#like- all the emotions i’ll be feeling i cant handle all of this

[dabislittlemouse]

I start freaking out whenever I remember that Touya’s backstory will be animated soon in the new season-

#we gonna see teen Touya 😭 #my poor baby #he deserved better #like- all the emotions i’ll be feeling i cant handle all of this #season 7 IS SO CLOSE #i cant believe it #dabi #touya todoroki #mha dabi #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #mha #bnha #todoroki

[ferrstappen]

Max the wag: are we the drama? l Max Verstappen Imagine

happy note: hello my loviessssss! How are you all? It feels like it’s been an eternity and I am so so happy to be back to writing and interacting with your great and incredible asks and everything <3 and I know I said this was supposed to be ready by Monday or so? but I started an internship and it's been harder than expected, but I'm getting the hang of it so be prepared for more works to come!

Probably tomorrow I’ll be posting a list of all the requests I’m incredibly behind but that way you know I got them and are on my mind and will be written <3 I also don’t know if you like the idea of starting a tag list? Please please let me know, babes <3 

ALSO I got an incredible request of the Max the wag series involving our boy Yuki AND I LOVED IT SO MUCH so it’s absolutely happening!

YOU CAND FIND THE MAX THE WAG SERIES HERE

summary: For the first time, Max and you find yourselves on the other end of the gossip.

Hungary Grand Prix, 2023.

Max wasn’t feeling like himself.

The car upgrades were supposed to be great, not to make him struggle and happy a shitty day, which meant shitty questions, passive aggressive press conference trying to not look so annoyed, but it didn’t help that the press was painstakingly working to get the worst angles with furrowed eyebrows and waving off strangers trying to aggressively approach him.

Of course, it didn’t help you weren’t there to hold his hand walking around the paddock, forcing his blue eyes to focus on your calming smile and the inevitable lovestruck expression plastered on his face. 

And yes, he was letting out the fact he didn’t leave Monaco in the best of terms. He’d grown accustomed to you tagging along to most races, but when you informed him you wouldn’t be able to make it to the last two races before summer break he didn’t take it the best way. 

Yes, Max understood you were needed at your job and deadlines were way more difficult to meet with changing time zones, bumpy flights and noisy paddocks and hospitalities, but it didn’t change the fact that he needed you and his selfish self really needed you cheering for him, even if you’d seen him win enough times already. 

In conclusion, it was safe to say he didn’t really feel like putting on a genuine smile or goof around with interviewers who’d ask the same questions while Christian tells him off for looking unapproachable. 

The only thing that turned the corners of his mouth was a WhatsApp attachment from you, Jimmy and Sassy sleeping with the F1 channel on full display on the TV. 

It wasn’t long until Twitter and Instagram fan accounts came to the conclusion you weren’t there with Max, creating a small discussion with some people arguing that it didn’t make sense you’d tagged along to places like Baku or Melbourne and not go to a race less far away and arguably one of the most popular tracks of the season, while other people defended you saying you had your own life apart from being Max’s girlfriend, you had a job, conferences to attend amongst other things, so it was ridiculous to expect you to be there for every race, no matter how much you loved Max. 

You don’t know whether it was the fact you didn’t post a story on Instagram celebrating Max’s win or the fact Max hadn’t been his best self, struggling with the car, losing control over the tiniest thing and just losing focus overall the fuel for some fans to start speculating about the status of your relationship.

User1: why hasn’t y/n  posted something about max?? she always does when she’s not with him

User2: something’s sus 

User3: no pls I cant handle another July break up

User4: max deserves someone who shows up for him! He arguably had the most difficult weekend of the season and she’s mia 

            User5: she’s always there for him and has a right to have her own life grow the hell up!

Belgian Grand Prix, 2023

Last race before summer break meant most people on the paddock were a turmoil of emotions between the desire for the weekend to be completely over and wishing to do the best possible job before the break.

Max convinced himself he was coming into the weekend relaxed, knowing he’d have to put his best strategies, talent and focus for Spa, but a few free weeks were right around the corner so he could recharge with you, staying in bed for the entire morning before getting up to get ready to go out, maybe arriving back to the apartment drunk and giggly only to regret everything during the morning, but with the knowledge you were going to do the exact same.

He was facetiming you when he came across lots of fans wanting his attention, asking for pictures, until someone asked for you and Max pretended he didn’t listen, not wanting to answer things about his relationship, and the woman that asked wasn’t even sharp enough to catch your face on full display on his screen. 

Had Max known the chaos it would ensue not answering the simple question about you, maybe he’d reconsider, especially since Lando and him jumped from the paddock to a helicopter waiting to take them to the closing night of Tomorrowland where Martin Garrix was closing the last weekend.

User1: *attached video* pls pls you HAVE to see the discomfort on max face when someone asked him about y/n something is not right with parents

            User2: we all know he never speaks about her thoo, im keeping my hopes up!!!!

User4: I’m calling break up and good cuz I never liked her always acted like she was too good for the f1 world and never communicated w fans

            User3: that’s called being reserved moron!!1 you don’t see other wags taking pics with fans except maybe lily bc she’s a pro golfer!!!

You were sitting on your bed when Victoria sent a thread on Twitter (or X? or Threads? it’s confusing) pointing at every proof and detail about your supposed break up, ironically asking if you had something to inform the family since Max hadn’t said anything. 

With widened eyes and unable to contain the urge to see what people were saying about Max and you, two hours later you were still reading gossip sites and didn’t even hear the door of the penthouse opening with both Sassy and Jimmy running away from the feet of the bed. 

“Is this the welcome I get?” Max’s voice announced his arrival, catching you by surprise and throwing the phone in the air. 

“Fuck, Max! You scared the shit out of me, I hate you!” You laughed, finally realizing he was right in front of you and kneeling on the bed to attach your arms around his neck, allowing Max to grab you by the thighs and spin you around while you left small kisses on his cheeks.

“What were you reading? You looked very focused,” Max carefully placed you back on the mattress before throwing his body and groaning at the feeling of his muscles relaxing.

“Did you know we broke up?” You questioned your boyfriend whose blue eyes opened as much as they could, eyebrows raised and slightly moving his head in confusion. 

Max was confused but still demanded an answer on what was going on as he watched the corners of your mouth lifting and quiet giggles leaving them. 

“Look, it’s full of theories because I didn’t attend the last races and after you went with Lando to watch Martin, some fans started drawing their own conclusions!”

“Are they insane? Speculating about other people’s love lives is so rude, and just because I didn’t answer a question about you which I never do? People are crazy!” Max exclaimed on an irritated tone, but quickly caught your eyes, making him realize the people commenting were doing the exact same thing as you, just on a larger scale. 

“Baby, I think this time we are the drama…” You stated before the bedroom became quiet.

It was just Max and you staring at each other, recalling every time you eavesdropped a conversation that clearly wasn’t meant for either of you to hear, or discussed different theories on who had cheated, who had broken up with whom, why some partners were so young or looked almost identical. 

“Schatz, I am not going to lie,” Max started with a frown and serious face before continuing. “I am very proud of us” After letting it out Max started laughing, his cheeks flushing and placing his hand over his mouth to try to stifle the sounds. 

“Baby, this definitely means we made it!”

It was bound to happen, you were meant to eventually become a source of spectacle if you enjoyed gossiping about other people’s lives so much. 

After laughing to the brink of tears, Max kissed your lips; softly, slowly and sensually, making it hard to separate but he stared right into your eyes and asked you in all seriousness: “Should we feed the gossip? Wouldn’t it be fun?”

#max the wag #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen blurb #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen au #max verstappen x you #f1 x you #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #max verstappen fluff #max verstappen fic #f1 fics #Max Verstappen

[holymolymacaroni]

“If I could love you I would” Damon Salvatore x reader

Tags: Angst, love, heartbroken reader, sadness, eventual makeup, reader is Elena’s older sister

“This is why I can’t be with you anymore, Y/N as much as I love you you will never be Elena to me, and I’ll only hurt you worse the more I stick around and pretend that you could take away all of those feelings I’ve felt. It does neither of us any good. I’m sorry I really am but I can’t hurt you anymore” Damon spoke as he dropped you off at your house as a sad look was framed on his face. "So....your choosing her, my own sister who's made it clear that she doesn't love you over me? Instead of the person who has only ever showed you love, kindness and happiness....t-this is it? Just like that?" You cried as tears couldn't stop forming around your eyes as you poured out your feelings "w-why can't I be good enough?" You asked as Damon frowned and looked away

“You are more than good enough Y/N, it’s just not that simple” he replied as he took a step closer to you, his eyes meeting yours “I know you understand why I can’t be with you anymore, you’re not stupid. It’s not that you’re not enough, it’s that you’re too much for me to handle right now. I need someone who can understand the person I am and the things I have to do, and you can’t do that. You’re too innocent, too pure. You deserve someone who can give you the life you want, and I can’t do that for you” he explained softly, his voice laced with regret "But I want you. More than anything else in this world. And that's the problem. I don't want to hurt you, but I can't stop myself from doing just that. It's not fair to you, or to me. We both deserve better than this." He took another step closer, his hand reaching out to brush a stray tear from your cheek. "I'm sorry, Y/N. I really am”

As he touched your cheek you couldn’t help but push his hand away from your face as anger and sadness clouded your judgment "Too innocent? Too pure? That's not what you were saying when you had me laying in your bed as you took my virginity Damon. I know more then you think I do but I know for a fact Elena will break your heart again and you know it.....why can't you just pick me Damon? Why are you and Stefan always fighting over Elena!? WHY CANT YOU FIGHT FOR ME FIGHT FOR THE LOVE I KNOW YOU FEEL FOR ME!?!" You yelled angrily as tears kept falling.

“Y/N, you’re right. I’m not perfect. And I did take your virginity because I wanted to, because you’re beautiful and amazing and I couldn’t resist. But that doesn’t change the fact that I can’t be with you. Not the way you deserve to be. I’m sorry, but it’s the truth. As for me and Stefan fighting over Elena, we do it because she’s the one who makes us feel alive again, who brings out the best and worst in us. She’s like a drug to us, and we can’t help ourselves. And as for fighting for you, I am fighting for you, in my own way. I’m trying to let you go so you can find someone who can give you what you want, someone who can make you happy, someone who won’t hurt you. I don’t want to be that person anymore. I can’t. I’m sorry” he said, his voice full of emotion as he took another step closer to me. "I know this hurts. But it's for the best. You deserve better than someone like me. Someone who isn’t me” he removed his hand from your face as he stepped back “I don’t expect you to understand darling, but you need too.”

“You don't know what I deserve Damon....everything you've told me about loving me and wanting to be with me until my dying breath was a lie... and it's all for Elena.....everything is always about Elena......everyone loves Elena....you, Stefan, Matt, EVERYONE!!!! What about m-me? What about me wanting love? What about me wanting you Damon? I can't just forget like you want me too....I-I love you Damon Salvatore I have since the first day I met you.....and I refuse to believe that you never loved me back.....but choose Elena I should have expected as such from you, your so far up her ass that you push anyway else away that could possibly love and care for you and it's all because you wanted what your brother had first....it's not that you love her it's you wanting to rip away Stefan's heart through her.” You spat angrily at him

He knew he shouldn't have said those things to her, he knew it would only make things worse. But he couldn't help himself. The pain in your eyes was killing him, and the thought of you loving him like that, it was too much to bear.

"Darling, you're right. I never should have said those things. I was angry and hurt, and I took it out on you. But that doesn't change the fact that I can't be with you. Not like this. I love you, Y/N. More than you'll ever know. But I can't risk hurting you again. I can't." He took a deep breath, trying to steady his voice. "I'm sorry. I should have just walked away from you, left you alone. But I couldn't do that. You're too important to me, and I don't want to lose you." He reached out then, his hand cupping your cheek gently, his thumb brushing away a stray tear. "I'm sorry. So very sorry. But I can't change who I am, or what I feel for Elena.” He spoke softly as the sadness that you felt coursed through him now.

“Just stop Damon, Just stop it okay I understand I'll never be good enough like Elena, I understand that you only used me as a distraction from her, I understand that no matter what I say or do you'll never choose me. I understand that Elena will always be the one I understand that you would do absolutely anything for her even if it meant losing your own life....I-I understand Damon but I wanted to be that person for you....I tried so hard to change myself to make you love me to make you want to pick me but I'll never be better then a second little measly option for anyone....it's all I ever am to you, to Stefan, to Matt to....to everyone okay. You just put it in big bold bright letters for me that I will NEVER be good enough....and for that Damon I'm sorry. My entire life everyone around me has always chosen Elena over me, of course they would she's the better, attractive, athletic sister and all I ever will be is the older sister who hides out in her room reading fantasy and romance novels wishing and hoping someone would finally see me....and I thought that was you Damon, but once again I'm clearly wrong.... once again Y/N another pat on your back for letting someone actually in thinking they could never hurt you.....” you spoke as you looked at Damon “I just wished you would I have told me this before I allowed myself to be attached to you over and over again” you spoke sadly as your heart finally broke all of your feelings poured from you.

“If I could love you I would” he sighed “I would do anything to be the person you deserve but I’m not. You have to face it Y/N as long as I’m around you, you’ll only get hurt” he spoke with a heavy heart, he turned and walked back to his car, his mind filled with images of your beautiful face, your smile, your tears. He knew he’d never forget you, never stop loving you. But he also knew that he couldn't be with you, not in the way you deserved. And so, he drove away, leaving behind the girl who had captured his heart, and the endless cycle of pain and regret that came with it. He felt a pain in his chest that was almost physical. He loved you, more than he ever thought possible. And yet, here he was, letting you go. It wasn't fair to you. But he knew it was the only way. He couldn't keep hurting you like this.

#damon salvarote #the vampire diaries #damon x reader #angst #love #Spotify

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

playboyy ep 12 stray thoughts

- “damn i hate myself” real

- first soong being cute 🥹🥹

- you know shits about to get emotional when the soundtrack switches to yoiyami

- “you called me a friend when you weren’t pretending to be nant” AND WHAT IF I LOSE MY MIND

- zouey and nont besties agenda

- OH GOD ZOUEY BACKSTORY wait noooooo

- i guess the evidence is staying hidden then like boy are they in their failvestigator era oh nvm they found something (that they already knew but still that’s more than they usually get

- promnont !!!

- hold on they finally showing zoueyteena. they can never just give a quick handy either always gotta be invoking the religious implications of a renaissance painting… good for them (yes i include the popcorn scene in this) also top zouey truthers this one was for you!!!

- what are you hiding under that tarp zouey 🤨🤨 i think it’s of nant

- hold on teena’s necklace lmao. is the t for troy no it’s for *too sleepy to finish the bit*

- NO GET A JOB!! STAY AWAY FROM HER!!!

- finna beat the shit out of jason lee give me 10 seconds i could take him out

- what does he mean by keep an eye on…

- oop that scarf zouey in his horse girl era

- THEY DOING WHAT TO WHO?!?!?

- she is not scared of them at all like two absolute kitty cats of toruturers MEKEKFKKRKRJFJFJF NOT THE DUSTERS I CANT

- the drop of sweat deserves an award for perfect timing and i’m being so serious about this

- AHH PROMNONT i can’t handle them being affectionate like it makes me lose my oh not the fuckass product placemntsjdjjdjdjrjrjjejdjr you know what i got me some promnont crumbs i’ll take it

- so i’m gonna see this scene expanded in fic later right 👀 i’ll give a million kisses to anyone who decides to do it

- they can never argue using simple sentences it’s always “i feel bad that you feel bad that i felt bad” and “im mad that you got mad that i got mad” and “if you have a problem that we have a problem than the problem is you’re invalidating my feelings” “i didn’t think you would think about me thinking” like besties….

- see but zouey was kinda right… why is he being made the bad guy, first and captain kinda pissin me off

- girl YOU got him expelled. captain needs to be fr

- NONT WITH THE BIG PANT CROPPED SHORT COMBO THATS MY MAN

- these college athletes are plain evil

- puen lowkey the only one in this show consistently talking sense. i hope he gets his licks back on these bum bitches cause i’ve had it with them

- the coloring the coloring the coloring the coloring the coloring the projection the projection the projection

- THE. HESS BOARD BEING PROJECTED PLAYBOYY SURREALISM FOR THE WON ONCE AGAIN

- captain talking big game for someone who took sneaky clips. hoping this shows growth on his part cause deep down im still rooting for him

- captain sweaty blow up the whole establishment i support you

- NO CAPTAIN THATS NOT WHAT I TOLD YOU TO DO THATS VERY MUCH MOT WHAT I JUST SAID YOU LITTLE BASTARD

- ooo the outro track finally making sense!! kejrjejdnjdj

- i love the when soong carries first

- oh more food, user @jeffsatyr i’m so sorry

- firstsoong enthusiasts we are so back oh there goes firsts fuckass dad

- captain needs to stop picking fights AND CAPTAINS A YANKEES fan i can’t defend him anymore

- puen fight back!!! he was going easy on captain cause he’s a nice little boy oh shit now aobs gonna kill captain isn’t he…

- captainkeenpuen enthusiasts don’t lose hope!!! we can still win!!

- aobpuen enthusiasts were so back

- THE COLORING THE COLORING THE COLORING

- the characters and 'accurately assessing the media their in' saga continues

- porsche looks like such a baby here. jump listen to porsche pls do not see him again

- cry by johannes bornlof is playing they fr pulling out the nuthphop ballads for the other couples today

- puen is my boy and i will lay down my life for him actually

- NONT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT IM GONNA WALHAT WHAT WYHAHW ok sorry yall him with the gun did sumn to me

- nont once again will not be caught slacking holding someone at gun point be damned AND ITS CAPTAIN WITB THE STEAL POLL?!?!?!?

- nont… i need to know how he picks outfits like did he want the color to match the gun????

- nont chuckling in the corner... i fear he’s lost it

- playboyy once again with the themes of tech and privacy

- captain is lucky puen is lowkey a pacifist

- nont and captain: torturing aob and puen for info about the murder, zoueyteena: painting time !!

- oh my god yall im getting chills like fr speechless i am so…

NUTH MY BABY BOY

- nuth coming through with his amateur directorial visions let’s gooooo

- nont being like “please do a little bit of torture, just for me, please 🥺”

- he playing the funeral violin oh it’s not ending well oh god

- jason lee you will crumble i am so serious about this count your mother fucking days

- nuth scurrying away in the back… also nont where is your marksmanship now

- puen keeps suffering tremendously and he doesn’t deserve a single second of it. free my boy he fr has never done anything wrong

- i think i was right and nuths screenplay is autobiographical

- THEYRE PLAYING AMBIVRLANT THOGUHTS AGAIN NUTHPHOP PIANO BALLAD ENTHUSAISTS WE STAY WELL FED

- nuthphop my beloveds i love them so fucking much you don’t get it no wait why he deleting them oh shit ! phop play shitty games win shitty prizes dawg

- welp

yall this might be one of the strongest eps in a hot minute i loved this one had me at the edge of my seat the whole time

#playboyy the series #playboyy spoilers

[mister-mickey]

Tim x Darry headconnons plz (like if they can get married or what is it like if they have an adopted child) SORRY TO ASK SO MUCH I just love this ship and its really my favorite one

THANK YOU🙏🏻

Omg tarry is my favorite pairing, I have made these little ship headcanons as well (tarry hcs)

BUT onto these ones

They mostly bond over being both the leaders of their respective gangs and over taking care of their younger siblings ❤️

They are terrible with emotions, communication between them is like pulling teeth 😭

They also have a hard time with each others siblings. Darry CANT STAND curly and is scared of Angela. Tim gets along with both pony and soda but anytime he gets them into trouble darry gets mad at him.

He’s really rather not piss his beau off

They’ve known each other since they were kids (thanks to living in the same area) but were never friends. It was only really after Darry got more involved in greaser stuff that they got along lol

Tim can’t cook for shit. He tries but it sucks so bad. Darry keeps trying to help him but Tim is unhelpable.

Darry is aware that Tim can handle himself, but still gets protective when ppl talk about him. Tim gets mad every time (but also does the same thing)

And omg I’m all the way into this list realizing that I did not answer the other part of the question so I’ll do that now

So for marriage (not legal for homos in the 60s sadly, so I’m sure it’s just a celebration among friends and family) it probably takes them awhile. I can’t imagine either of them really wanting to settle straight away. Maybe they’re in their late twenties/early thirties

Tim probably moves into Darry’s house after pony and soda move out (and after angie and curly are well off enough to be alone)

Tim probably stops gang life in his twenties, just because he gets older and more mature (and not cool anymore) darry stops once the others stop.

For the wedding, again, family and friends. Probably in the form of a cookout at their house. They get rings but I don’t think either of them wear them (they don’t seem like jewellry wearers. They probably keep them on chains around their necks)

Pony officiates lol. Idk I just feel like he would. Soda cries the whole time (Steve has to physically pull him off of darry)

I imagine dally and curly pulling some sort of nonsense at the wedding to piss Tim off (yes I’m choosing to keep dally and Johnny alive)

Tim’s gang isn’t really his family, at this point in his life, he probably doesn’t even know them anymore. So it’s just curly and Angela at the wedding for him.

Darry ofc is the one that people came to see (mr star of the show)

As for a kid, I’d like to say they probably wouldn’t have one, at least not for a while. They both raised their little siblings, they aren’t eager to do it again.

BUT it’s also cute to imagine them having a baby (especially because of how tim is canonically good with babies)

Idk where they got it. Maybe it was left in their doorstep, idk. Fact is, they have a child

Tim wants to be the cool dad but darry has taken that spot without even trying.

Baby adores darry because he’s strong and can throw it in the air ❤️

Tim is jealous ofc. He’s way cooler than darry, the baby just isn’t smart enough to see that yet

Baby still loves him a lot though 🌸

They’re good dads. Not perfect ofc, but they love the baby and the baby loves them.

Now as for the baby’s one million uncles and one aunt.

Angela LOVES the baby. Like, darry is worried she will steal it. She’s always trying to get the baby to say her name (baby calls her “Ana”)

Twobit is next on people taht are obsessed with the baby. I’m sure he has his own kids (seems like the type tbh) but the baby is DARRYS kid. He can’t wait until it’s old enough to be a bad influence on

Dallas is not allowed near the baby because Tim refuses to put the baby down when he’s around (he thinks dally will somehow corrupt his >1 year old and make it dally jr)

Soda is the best uncle by far. He and Johnny are very soft with the baby. Soda is, however, guilty of dropping the baby. He is no longer allowed to hold the baby.

Johnny is scared to hold the baby, but once it’s walking he will play (very gently)

Steve, curly, and pony are the babies worst enemies. Baby fucking hates them so much and it breaks their hearts.

Baby bites steve any chance it gets. Hits him, grabs his nose (which everyone else thinks is adorable but Steve sees it for the attack that it is) Steve has no clue what he did but the baby is his #1 hater

Baby doesn’t like pony. Wont even look at him. Pony adores the baby and this rejection hurts.

Curly and the baby tussle quite often. Baby loves yanking his curls (getting its grubbing fingers tangled in, as someone with baby experience, ow ow ow) if the baby pulls his hair, he pulls the baby’s hair right back. They are sworn enemies.

He loves the baby ofc but keeps a careful distance.

Baby grows up to be an okay kid. Can’t do anything without darry or tim finding out since they both know EVERYONE.

Idk someone name the baby my brain is mush

#the outsiders #tim shepard #darry curtis #curly shepard #dallas winston #angela shepard #ponyboy curtis #steve randle #sodapop curtis #johnny cade #two bit mathews #dim/tarry #the outsiders hcs #the outsiders headcanons

[marinaiguess]

the vocal themes from frontiers describe a specific theme on their lyrics and it gradually turns from fear to acceptance (i suppose) i’ll be talking abt these (in the order of their “appearance” in game): i’m here, undefeatable, break through it all, find your flame, vandalize.

(also spoilers)

i’m here is a lot about doubting and reassurance. it starts with sonic “leaving the life he knew before” “finding the truth of who he’s meant to become”, revealing a degree of uncertainty. despite the fact sonic has always moved forward, “to new horizons”, he “fights this fear, with his life”, fights the fear of losing his friends. but in the next pre-chorus, it seems like he can hear his friends (“don’t be afraid, i will be with you”) who are trying to reassure him and give him the strength he needs to keep on fighting. in the end, he still moves forward, but now he’s more assured as “the way ahead’s becoming clear.”

undefeatable is about a strong sense of confidence that overshadows the real emotions sonic is feeling (a topic touched by the next song as well). that’s mostly fear. sonic seems to be handling everything well so far, even saying that “think im on 11 but im on a 9, guess u dont really know me” which shows he really believes he is “undefeatable” and that makes sense, especially since he is in his super form for the first time since the beginning of their adventure and is certain the chaos emeralds will help him complete his mission (he doesnt know yet that the emeralds disperse after visiting a different island). however, he keeps repeating “face your fear” and it serves as a reminder to himself that he cant avoid this emotion. “i used to never know/this feeling’s just a ghost” is him trying to persuade himself that this fear is momentary and that he has to focus on the battle to keep moving forward.

break through it all is about accepting and overcoming the fear. sonic still tries to convince himself to keep the fight going (“dont look down”) but at the same time he’s calling out to his enemy (”show yourself”). that’s when he’s found most of his friends but has yet to find tails. he wants to end this and quickly, so he doesnt wait for the enemy to appear on its own. now he knows that he “cant hide from what he feels”, he’s still afraid but more determined (”no more compromise, this is do or die”) and ready to risk it all. half of the chorus is sonic’s friends hyping him up, telling him that he “wont fade out, cuz the fire in him never dies” and that he shouldnt stop cuz they have a mission. sonic has been listening to them and he knows they have been with him this whole time, so he accepts that they will be okay cuz they are fighting alongside him (”we wont stop until the battle’s won”) and until the end of the song, sonic talks on behalf of all of them. 

find your flame is about the ultimate disappearance of that fear. theres no fear overshadowing what he has to do (”take a seat, im on a mission”) and he’s carrying his friends with him in this one (”we wont back down”). sonic has surpassed his frontiers (”im here to go beyond my limit”), he is at the worst state possible (cybercorrpution) and is eager to end the fight, even more now that hes reunited with his little bro. (”i’ve been waiting for my moment to strike”). he has no inhibitions, he’s not restraining himself, he’s not feigning confidence but he is filled with it (all the pre-chorus indicates that). 

now, heres an interesting take (which ofc may be completely wrong but oh well): “will the whole world know your name/ when we dance with destiny?” is a line asked by sage, trying to understand sonic. “im never gonna stop believing” is tails’ response as he tries to prevent sonic from doubting himself. he is the only one who has been with sonic for the longest time, the only one who “has been there and has seen it”, sonic’s willpower and strength, so he reminds him that “he’ll find his flame” (it connects with the conversation sage and tails had regarding sonic’s abilities). and now, sonic is sure that this is “the end of the show” and that he’ll find his flame thanks to his friends. 

vandalize is about the aftermath. sonic was betrayed (”you promised to help me rebuild/you caught me off guard”) he is in pain. this whole adventure has left a mark, it has vandalized his heart. from losing his friends, to finding them, to not being able to save them, to having to find the chaos emeralds again and again while fighting the cyber corruption and then getting betrayed but also barely managing to make it out in one piece yet not being able to save everyone (rip sage). there’s no fear. just determination, certainty. and pain. even when the physical pain stops, the emotional damage (LOL) has been dealt. no matter what happens next, this adventure has left a mark on sonic.

#thats all i guess #(Not me singing bring you back while writing this down) #im bored to edit this further so #here you go people #what do yall think #sonic frontiers spoilers #sonic frontiers #sth #sonic the hedgehog #miles tails prower #sonic and tails #sage the ai #im here #undefeatable #break through it all #find your flame #vandalize

[thisdreamplace]

hiii!! dream hruu💗 hope ur having wonderful times and happy days☆I deeply apologize that isn’t an ask! but you helped me so so much so I wanted to share all of this with you so👯‍♀️

I’m not sure if this is even considered a success story and I read one of ur posts in this master list doc and I will qoute some of the things that changed me completely💗

( so I apologize if this is extremely long :P hahaha I never expected to be at this place ) I hope if some where in the same spot as me , maybe this can help some others♥️♥️)

When I first started I was very afraid , going through terrible times, low self worth, feeling like life was being done to me , losing friends and feeling like I wasn’t enough for anyone and they’re right for leaving me. constantly dominated by fear , anger and desire and despair. I felt like things are just a loop and I will never get through this bc “I don’t deserve it.” “do I deserve to even live in peace and harmony or even able to get through this or am I a terrible terrible person & forever will be… and how so”

until I stumbled upon ur page and others . Seeing others show how to help and care and things about intrusive thoughts, negative emotions etc. made me feel so less alone💌I felt so relieved and I decided to read I promised myself

“ I will never ever ignore myself ever again” “

your post indiff \ doing nothing helped me forever my gratefulness goes miles for you💗💗 when I first saw it was like “ DOING NOTHING WHAT!!!” lowkey terrified and scared bc in the face of the ego it’s a terrifying feeling. I was so hesitant to do it at first feeling like , am I just accepting that terrible thoughts and things will forever happen to me , always fighting every single thought I had. you wrote

“but what if, we actually did nothing ? just sat with it, and let it be ? well now what ? does that thing actually hold any power anymore ? nope. indifference starves the old way of being” - @/thisdreamplace

something inside me said “ give it a chance” so I decided to just do nothing allowing anything to come and go not holding onto anything just laying down and being. Not labeling anything but letting it flow. letting myself breathe and feel whatever I needed to getting it all out with time and love , as uncomfortable and as many tears ran down my face I decided that I’m not gonna hold onto this anymore. Letting emotions / feelings / thoughts rise and fall and rise again not arguing not running away, comforting myself and reassuring myself like you said “ I do care but not enough to do anything about it” and I felt so light and some days not still felt heavy as ever but I let go💗without forcing to let go or even wallowing, I let it stay as long as it needs to and then let it free beacuse it doesn’t have power over me it’s meaningless , but I’ll welcome it with love 💗💗♥️

kinda like sitting on a beach wave and letting the waves hit me no matter how hard the waves are I’ll continue to sit down 🌊🌊and enjoy the view

letting go and letting god. I struggled with this concept so much. “ WHAT?? LET GO?? NU UH….WHAT IF I CANT TRUST THAT.” “But what if it goes so well💗” letting go? what will happen to me… what will happen. but out of love I decided to let go little by little

“. i mainly do this all by allowing myself to surrender to whatever comes up, whether its in the 3d or within me. it doesn't matter. whether its beautiful or ugly, i surrender to it and know god will handle it, because god is on my side. i am on my own side. i definitely let go and let god — i practice trust in this way.”--@/thisdreamplace

this helped me , beacuse I was going through so much feeling deviated feeling like I was taking hit by hit. Heartbroken time from time or even the happiest I could ever be all I reminded my self regardless “ I am in the right place ♥️I am where I supposed to be “ or even “ I know god will handle i beacuse god is on my side “ or even just “everything will be ok” and walked on into my day💗 I choose things that made me so happy , so loved so sentimental , when faced with things or situations I let myself feel through it and comforted myself beacuse I deserve love at all times no matter what is the situation or even if it’s considered negative💗I didn’t give the negative emotions hate , I starved them from any negativity even as bad the thought , I fought it with love and patience and gave it the time it needed until I could move into the state I prefer.

one thing I used to do is I knew all of this and acted on it but, I was always in my room , never going out or even just doing nothing. Just isolated from the world beacuse I used to think that was right . I was always dealing with emotions and thoughts it happened all the time, I was so distraught I knew what to do but I’m so tired. Until I read this by you( it quite literally changed my life)

“i started to push myself out of my comfort zone and go do things in real life, rather than sitting in my room telling myself "i dont have to lift a finger ! if i just sit in here in my mind it will surely happen" (i got tired of telling myself that after 2 years of a rather stagnant-feeling life) so i said fuck it and started doing things. which only snowballed because then i got comfortable doing things. and now ive had so much fucking fun in my life in just the past couple months. i only say that because it still blows my mind n i am beyond thankful for my experiences this year !” - @/thisdreamplace

“take it step by step, little things that are out of your norm and you will see the way life responds to you so beautifully”-@/thisdreamplace

I was like so confused at first but then , I had this strong urge within me to just take a walk, something that was irregular I mean it’s freezing cold why would I? But it was so strong I was like yk frick it!! I took a walk expecting nothing but honestly just a good walk. I felt so much better or even some days the same but I started doing things that where considered “ out of nowhere” “irregular “ like taking a nice walk watching a movie , going outside and having fun, eating a new place and it has changed me 💗💗

( omg sorry if this already so long but these are some quotes that honestly changed my perspective)💗💗

“nothing that is in front of you at this moment, is an obstacle or something you need to pretend isnt there.”-@/thisdreamplace

“take what you have and let it be part of what guides you. make that your goal. feeling complete. (or whatever you want, really) when that is your goal, instead of your desire, you wake up everyday and make decisions based on your true self. not that egotistic urge for results.””-@/thisdreamplace

“life responds to you perfectly when youre just busy loving yourself and making the most out of each day. :') things just happen with ease and so beautifully. <3”-@/thisdreamplace

there’s so many more posts that helped me but this so SO LONG OMG, so I will end it off here. There’s are some others that helped tho :). “How can I feel like I’m god?” “Going back and forth” “no effort “ “for those who struggle” etc.

bless you dream you’ve changed my perspective and I will continue to follow this all. my gratefulness cannot be put into words. I’m beyond grateful 💗💗thank you so so very much my dear dream. I am wishing you forever and ever happy days , happy everything and lovely lovely experiences/dreams♥️have a great life 💗♥️♥️♥️♥️🫂- anon who types too much LOL

hiiii <3 i'm doing vvvv well, and i hope you are too ! sorry it took me a while to reply to this message, but omg. you are THE CUTEST. it seriously made my day opening this app and seeing this message from you !! it's so thought out and extremely touching. i appreciate you taking your time to write this to me. 🥹💓

first of all, i'm inspired by you ! i love reading how much you have overcome on your own, allowing yourself to feel those difficult things and not wavering for yourself, keeping moving forward despite it all. and i really love this bit, "kinda like sitting on a beach wave and letting the waves hit me no matter how hard the waves are I’ll continue to sit down 🌊🌊and enjoy the view" super real, and true. just letting ourselves flow along with the river of life... and enjoying the sights along the way :')

I LOVE YOU ANON WHO TYPES TOO MUCH 🥰 lmfao fkdjkfdk no but seriously, you have no idea what this messages means to me and how warm i felt reading it. you are so beautiful, and truly so deserving of all of the lovely things you're allowing yourself to experience now and to come. continue being open, continue waking up everyday and choosing to do things out of love. and once again, thank you so much for this message. it's truly so beautiful and uplifting. i hope you continue to have the happiest days <3

🫧🕊

[ssreeder]

THIS IS GOING TO BE AN INTERESTING READ SREEDIE BC IVE GOT VAVAVOOM BY NICKI MINAJ STUCK IN MY HEAD RN

hey handsome ;)

I’m back bc you can’t get rid of me ever <3

katara is so real for finding comfort in arbitrary routine. like I’m not following the politeness rules for YOU I’m following the politeness rules for ME so that I feel better >:(

ALSO what I think is really important to remember and usually gets lots in fanon, the fact that zuko like.. literally IS the face of the fire nation in the war for katara. like she has nobody else to project on OF COURSE it’s going to be fucking Rough to overcome her hatred for zuko when he’s literally synonymous with genocide for her. unless there’s somebody else she can realistically focus on (ie. the fire lord is too abstract a concept for her rn), it’s never really gonna get better AND YOU CANT BLAME HER bc how else are you meant to process fear and anger if you have nowhere to direct it (does this line of thinking mean I need therapy sreedie?? answer honestly)

OHOHO look at that sreedie. I’ve gone an anticipated katara’s own musings. I’m so psychic today.

also really depressing that zuko actually does canonically look like his father so like… katara isn’t exactly Wrong to imagine his face

aaaaaand he’s back to normal with the monosyllabic responses !! and anger !! he’s healing so well.

trust zuko to argue about the semantics of life saving lmfao

CRYING WHEN ANGRY IS SO FUCKING ANNOYING I FEEL YOU SO HARD KATARA

not katara accidentally predicting the zukka relationship out of anger T-T

NOT THE “I will be back” NOTE ZUKO PLS

SLAY AANG ILY AANG YOURE THE BEST ZUKKA WINGMAN EVER

ughhh FUCK OFF IROH just say you’re homophobic jfc

YES JEE I’m always in the I Love Jee camp so this is nothing new BUT YES CRITIQUE IROHS HANDLING OF ZUKO

jee is TOTALLY a literature nerd with all the analysis of implications of zukos outfit that he’s doing and I am so here for it

HAIR RUFFLES WIDNWLDNQPXBWFORN THE HAIR FRHDKWE AODKW I am completely calm and reasonable about this.

sokka is like “I’m so good at being subtle about being in love with zuko :D” and zuko is like WE JUST FUCKED IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY MAYDAYMAYDAY

LMAO jee is like FINALLY some drama to become invested in

I LOVE CULTURAL CUSTOMS AHHHHHH I’m such a goddamn nerd ohmygod

YAYYYY TOPH I love toph she’s a ride or die fr

nooooo now I’m emotional about jee. the whole being fire nation first and human being second is a really nice touch though, in terms of world building and reasoning behind why fire nation citizens are so committed to the war effort despite their own suffering bc of it

wait wait maybe I’m going insane rn but WAIT a moment please… so this is what I’m working with: when zukka got separated, sokka became like Both of them?? like they didn’t have each other to balance themselves out, so sokka adopted zukos personality (without the zuko skill set Unfortunately) and conversely, zuko like… Had Neither personality bc he was fucking Dying so he had other priorities. and now both of them are out of whack bc their personality divisions are fucked

OMG RASU telling sokka he groped zuko in front of everyone T-T he’s doing the lord’s work

ohohohoboho rasu knowssssss ʰᵉʰᵉʰᵉʰᵉʰᵉ

THESE BITCHES ARE ENGAGED OMG

DADKODA AND CHANGGGGGGG oh I’m so happy rn. I’m genuinely going to squeal when chang and zuko reunite AND FUCK IROH HE CAN GET FUCKED JEE GET A BETTER LEADER TO DEDICATE YOURSELF TO

anyways :D

I’m expecting zuko and chang to have the most magical long awaited airport reunion imaginable, and if these two bitches DONT hug I’m going to cut all your electrical wires and clog your toilets

KISSES XXXXXX

I have accepted I’ll never be rid of you, so I’ve stopped trying. <3

Haha, I think we could ALL use some therapy lol <3 but as for Katara I think she is allowed to be upset and dramatic because she is 15 and tired. So stop being an asshole Zuko.

I think both Zuko & Katara left that interaction feeling less than satisfied.

I love writing Jee as the man who notices shit. Haha. Why is his collar so high? IDK JEE WHAT DO YOU THINK?!

fucking love Jee

I’m a sucker for details, and unfortunately I can’t always get them all out into the writing but I wasn’t going to CUT (hahahaha GET IT??) the hair lore mwahaha.

Dude Chang and Zuko reunion is long over due but also I might be a dick and just bomb everything before Chang gets close

Why not right?

KISSSSSSESSSSS XOXOXO

#I saw your gossip girl ask and YEASSSSS BESTIE #fuck it I loved gossip girl #Chuck bass my beloved #I have a think for emotional bad boys I guess #anywayyy zuko and Sokka ARENT really bad boys though #a couple of dweebs #leekie i love you #& im always happy to see your brain popping off during the chapters #dude jee is really out there doing gods work #& everyone keeps calling iroh homophobic MAYBE HE JUST HASNT SAID ANYTHING YET #OKKKK??? #y’all need to leave my man iroh alone #he is flawed haha but DAMN #idk if I’d call him homophobic lol #(or maybe he is I’m dangling that pov right above y’all) #OK LEEEEEKKIIIEEEE #see you soon #leekie tag #liab #itf #ask

[kenonade]

stella maris reading log #1

its about damn time i start noting down how i feel when i read what i read. hell yeah. hopefully this makes me a better writer.

spoilers not really about the plot (bc honestly is there even a plot in the sense of a plot) but more about the language below the cut woooooo

tldr: book cool. writing insane. wtf. wtf. wtf. head ouchie. 越级打怪的后果就是头晕脑转 (dizziness is the consequence of attempting to read beyond my level). ooga booga man talk abt english

reading stella maris is so interesting because im just sitting here wondering like. how the FUCK did mccarthy accumulate all this knowledge about a variety of very distinct fields. my brain hurts. this is so much information. im learning nothing and learning everything at the same time. how the man managed to learn all this stuff and how he managed to put it together like this puzzle me equally intensely. its one thing to acquire knowledge. its a whole other thing to convey it in language so dense with information but also character. like, not to be that guy, but when osc does his infodumps i think to myself okay old man lets get you to bed. every time alicia opens her mouth i confront my intellectual inferiority and contemplate the meaning of life because it is alicia talking.

not to mention what the FUCK alicia. if only you’d have KNOWN. EUGH. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT.

my head hurts. the reason why im writing instead of reading is because ive already reached my reading breaking point where my eyes glaze over and the words go in one and out the other. its only been two hours. difficult language i can handle fine, verbosity is fine, i inhaled the ender stuff and only took breaks when osc pissed me off, but stella maris is information overload in a way that i’ve never experienced before. im like, texting three separate people all the time. oh i should vet this w my math guy. i need to show this to my psych classmate. this has to go to my orthopedics bestie.

i started this book saw the page number and went oh sure. its half the length of the passenger. the style means that it’ll contain less words overall too. i should be able to finish this on a three hour hsr ride. WRONG. i CANT. it’s TOO DIFFICULT. im running into roadblocks very similar to what i felt when i read the passenger: dont know place/name/context/big word. except im finding stella maris to be even more difficult because unlike some nautical jargon or random place in the midwestern usa that i can just look up, i cant. i think its impossible to even begin to comprehend all this math.

that’s definitely part of the charm of stella maris. the format of audio transcripts creates a much more intimate connection between the characters and the reader. the target demographic of this novel, though niche, is definitely not as niche as to comprise only of genius mathematicians with a burning passion for music and a hatred of psychology. the reader might be a master in one of these fields, but alicia outsmarts them in it along with all others. viewed through this lens, the reader is the doctor. the reader is the one who converses with alicia, trying their best to piece together a mind that is so extraordinarily genius and extraordinarily tormented. it’s a position of emotional significance. the reader sits through these audio recordings because they want to understand alicia. and to understand alicia is to love her. (this is a certified when i truly understand my enemy i love him moment)

all of that sits in stark contrast to western’s narration in the passenger.

i wrote an entire paragraph but tumblr fucking ate it. im pissed. its ok. for love i’ll write it again.

western’s narration is detached. it’s impersonal. mccarthy’s clinical and direct use of language alienates the viewer and prevents the formation of any sincere rapport, allowing only mild sympathy for western’s continued suffering. the reader is merely an observer, piecing together the life of a strange, curious creature through inference and deduction. nor is the reader meant to empathize with him. he’s the one who chose to abandon alicia, the one reckless enough to chose race car driving over his degree, and therefore the one who shoulders alone the responsibility of alicia’s death—or so he thinks. in a sense, because western is comparatively lucid, the detached narration becomes almost a punishment for the guilt he’s assigned to himself. he’s not the one in the mental asylum, afterall.

its interesting to me how mccarthy presents this duo to the audience. i have many Thoughts on alicia’s sexuality and stuff but i should finish the book before i synthesize those thoughts. anyway. thanks for reading 👍

#stella maris #cormac mccarthy #kenon.notes #honestly i think at this point i should start a book blogging tag #hm #kenon.reads #it’s cringe but it will suffice #ok this turned into a thing about #the passenger #also #book reading #english #????????? #how do you tag this stuff #idk

[veys-mood-of-mentalbreakdown]

Aaaaalright i feel like this would probably be perfect for r/amitheasshole but i couldnt be bothered to put it on reddit. But I’ll formulate it like i would if i posted it there (EDIT: tried to post it to r/AITA but it wouldnt let me cuz its over 3000 characters)

Am i the asshole for wanting to tell a birthday party guest to not come anymore

This weekend March 11th 2023 the body will be 19 years old, to celebrate this we’re having our first actual birthday party with friends. We’ve invited 5 friends and all of them are coming some of them also sleep over as they come from far. Including the person id love to tell that they arent welcome anymore, we’ll call this person K.

As i said before this is the first time we ever thrown a party, so we are understandably stressed to get everything perfect. We don’t ask for help of the guest because we want to get it all ready ourselves (which as of now we have succeeded in and almost have everything ready).

K from day one started complaining about everything and anything. First it was about alcohol. About if we had vodka, and if we had different vodka than a certain brand because they only like that kind of stuff. Then it was about food, constantly making a problem about the snacks ans foods we were getting, i would share screenshots but i cant for privacy reasons so i’ll put it down as a list

- will there be enough food?

Yes there will be enough food

- will it be cold or warm, we only like to have warm food for dinner

We will make sure there will be cold and warm foods and foods you can eat both cold and warm

- yea but will there be enough

Yes there will be enough

- snacks dont sound like food to me

We call it snacks because we’re going to get tapas like dishes, meaning many different kinds of food

- will there be enough??

Yes K there will be enough

- i just dont have a right feeling about this

About what? The party or the food?

- the food at the party, i have a bad gut feeling about this

She then also started getting upset about the people we invited to our birthday party and the fact some of them are system’s like us (she is fully aware we are a system) saying that she thinks it’s going to be too much to handle, which i can get, i just don’t understand why she didnt tell us up front and said she wasnt going to come instead of getting angry at us for it.

She then said it would be a rollercoaster of emotions for her, and wanted to have a moment where she could just talk to our host privately about her emotional baggage at our host’s birthday party, and ofcourse like the good friend our host is, he agreed to play therapist because he’s afraid she’ll leave and bitch about him to others.

We made a playlist for music for the party, inviting everyone that will come to add music so theres a bit of everyone’s music tastes, we asked if everyone could add party vibe music and asked to not add music sorts that are triggering to us or others coming to the party (we specified what triggers us and asked everyone to specify if they have any music that can be negatively triggering)

Full knowing this, K asked us if she can add Reggae and added a few too, knowing full well that this is one of the things that is highly triggering to our host as one of the big ab*sers in our life only ever listened to that stuff, they got upset when we told them rather not and then our host said “okay but not too many, 1 or 2” to satisfy her, knowing it would most likely cause flashbacks of some sort. She then said “you know what its your party” and deleted it from thw playlist under the condition that she gets to have moments at the party where she can listen to her own music, which fine by us ig.

She then said she wasnt sure if she was going to come after all because of all the things she spoke about before that made her feel uncomfortable and feel it might be too much for her weren’t fixed. So we said alright.

Then she said she knew it would be too much for her and said she was going to come later.

I really want to tell her in a polite manner that she needs to fuck off and isnt welcome anymore at the party, she single handedly made the pressure and stress so high and blames us for it when we told her we were handling it and it was stressing us out.

After which she also said “im sorry, i feel like im too much in our business”

So are we (am i personally) the asshole for wanting to tell her she no longer is welcome?

#did #osdd #did system #dissociative personality disorder #alter #dream smp fictive #dream smp #fictive #r/aita #am i the asshole?

[nonclassyparty]

firstly, tell me why i had that wooyoung shit figured OUT LMAOOO. I literally called it HAHAHA. the way i knew this fool was part of the fruit community

i love the idea that like this story and your writing in general continues to make me go, men ain’t shit fr. but then my tiktok has san getting scared while playing video games and mingi being called pink princess like 🧌.

reading this story with the prologue in mind is insane bc i get that technically no one has really done anything wrong yet ? per se. but san rlly is or ig…is going to be? a grade a asshole.

atp i can understand that sans not at fault (YET apparently) bc like, let’s be real LMAO the agreement was set in place and even y/n herself UNDERSTANDS it, she just continues to play into it bc of her feelings. i cant imagine how san ACTUALLY ends up fucking up (ig putting aside the fact that he couldn’t even be a friend or at the very least an acquaintance and help her w her assignment). like ik y/n probably WILL get mad but she doesn’t rlly hav the right to get mad at him for kissing that girl watever her name is cus she and san aren’t exclusive. but like regardless of the fact, i’m stil obv rooting for y/n bc she’s going through it and she’s being treated terribly by so many ppl for stupid reasons, esp w the knowledge that they all think so shallowly of her and don’t take into account any of her actual interests or experiences like damn.

AND THEN there’s like the fact that (entirely from context and my assumptions alone) y/n didn’t even outright SAY any of this or tell san how she felt until she wrote that letter AFTER THE FACT like ??? that’s INSANE like my brain is scrambling to finish the puzzle before i even hav all the pieces. like ik u said ur not sure about the ending but does san get the letter ? do we even see how he reacts to it ???? (i’m assuming she’ll tell wooyoung or hongjoong tbh)

ALSO i can’t get over the description of why yunho doesn’t like y/n like…damn, homie’s giving incel energy. giving nate jacobs wanting maddy to be a virgin energy (but not nate jacobs wanting maddy cus yunho apparently can’t handle high maintenance bad bitches). idk he’s giving very small peepee, in the closet, daddy issues energy and yeosangs got his own issues that we don’t even know about yet like don’t let me find out i’ll probably lose it.

i’m LITERALLY rambling nonsense and i’m at work rn. anyways amazing work ONCE AGAIN. i cant get over how you write and how you flesh out the characters. cant wait for my boy mingi to be properly introduced. let’s see how my emotions handle that.

-🧃

there is so much to discuss in this message hold on;

first of all, wooyoung being part of the skittles squad well idk how you got that right i'll be honest with you

this is exactly why when i write i have to stay away from atz content bc i went and watched the new wanteez eps today and i just cant write afterwards bc san is so fawking soft and precious how am i supposed to write him as a fuckboy that breaks hearts??? at one point i was like 'damn i shouldve picked someone else as the fuckboy for starring role' and not HIM😭😭

about san fucking up, it will happen in act 8 and i cant say anything else without giving away spoilers but yes! san never promised her anything, yn is aware of it and she knows where the two of them stand deep down but she just doesnt want to accept it (spoiler: that will basically be what the next chapter is about). also keep in mind that the story doesnt end with the letter, there are a couple more chapters afterwards 😭

YUNHO. WAIT NOT TOO MUCH ON HIM?? thats still my man but i wasnt really going for that sort of energy but now re-reading the part about him, i could see why it might've came off like that 😭. basically, with yunho i was going for the type of guy that doesnt like spoilt girly girls who care about makeup, clothes and are shallow, that only dates girls who, by his standards, have some depth to them and are sorta not-like-other-girls but in a pinterest cottage core aesthetic way (kjsghdjfhkfdj??? idk if that makes sense but he likes sweet girls who he can bring back home to his parents basically. its pretty much what svoh yn was) and yet he would still sleep with starring role yn without a doubt 😭. he was inspired by many guys ive meet in college

yeosang's storyline...im kind of nervous about revealing it tbh, also mingi will be properly introduced in the next chapter! as something much more than just boyoung's friend.

thank you so much for this message, i always look forward to yours in particular and theyre so fun to read. i really appreciate them. i hope you have a good day 💝

#🧃anon

[the-travelling-witch]

(i walk in, sighing while i set up a briefcase like the dude from the incredibles) i didn't spend 6 years going to school for psychology to deal with dottore but i guess i have to now. we cant just kill a dude and we all know he's joining in the teapot later so how are we handling this absolute shitshow mihoyo has thrown our w- (scaramouche in the distance: FUCK YOU) on second thought we're going to need more therapists

“we can’t just kill a dude” are you sure

i’ll rest my case, dottore won’t be a playable character just like la ice coffin over there, so we might as well get rid of him now jsjsh

but we do need more therapists, i agree

scara: …so she abandoned me because she didn’t deem me strong enough

kazuha: and how does that make you feel?

scara: i rejected humanity and sought out a plot of pure vengeance by stealing her source of power, rising to be a god of my own and recreating a possible war crime

kazuha: mhm, i can see why you would but i have the feeling you’re avoiding my question; let’s get back to your emotions…

#coffee & tea break #letter from: the lovely lunahorizon ✿ #kazuha is doing his best #for legal reasons most of this is a joke jshsh #also please excuse my poor impression of a therapist #kazuha #scaramouche #dottore

[rottingsparrow]

Part 2 (redo) of Reading Lore Olympus

I am doing a test to see if more people see this if I only review ten episodes at a time. It makes sense, I wouldn’t wanna read that much either. So here’s episodes 11-20, I’ll be posting 21-30 shortly after. Here’s part one again

Ep 11

Touch count total: 7 lmao

Cat. kitty cat

Artemis jumps to conclusions so fast

Did artemis’ bangs grow

Ope and its short again

It would be different it it wasnt noticeable but like the style changes too

Why does artemis not have scissors

How is her hair perfect after a slice

It looks like she is pulling her skin when she is taking her clothes off

Is she wearing a bra?? Bc if she isnt her boobs shouldnt be sitting like that

Oh she is now

“Demeter is such a helicopter mom” i mean yeah but also i dont think the mortal realm has.. Yknow internet

Eros is pink now idk if i preferred him as a light purple

Maybe like a mixture thats cool

Ep 12

Artemis like true form looks cool but so normal yknow

Inside!

“No wings i just vacuumed” quick rachel how do wings work

I do like the cut out in the back of the shirt for the wings

Artemis feels like the mom that is like “put on pants ur uncle is coming over” like huh?? Persephone is just not wearing pants

Youre just soooo pretty persephone omg

Eros and persephones colors accidentally get so close ugh

“I dont” look at her face its so. Yeah

Is yoga for sex or

Is he holding a necklace i thought he was pulling tears and i was so confused when i originally read this

Ep 13

Did aphrodite get darker

She definitely did esp in the panel where she says “psyche”

I know they are family of love but i do worry about the possible emotional incest that could occur honestly. I dont think it happens but it gets close

Ok so he passes the underworld so it goes olympus- underworld- mortal realm or am i dumb

The pig is so cute

How did she not realize her veil thingy fell off

Was her family abusive in the og story or was this just so eros would fall even more for her

When did he get the bow and quiver dont just say magic

Ep 14

The little switches in time got me confused the first time i read it

Oh boy he got an apartment

If i were psyche i would be scared deadass

“The ugliest creature youve ever seen” ok thats cool its fun

Ep 15

Listen. How the hell did she adapt to this bc if i went to a diff realm and all of a sudden there was like. Indoor plumbing i would panic the hell out of my mind

Like shes even wearing modern clothes

“I'm certainly not the pig” hehe i like the pig

Why does he not hang out with her when he isnt busy like

Hookup count is 2 now

Ok ok this may be stupid but what if he just made her go by a diff name

Also your mother needs therapy

I would want to leave too

“Do you trust me?” thats kinda guilt tripping ngl

“Maybe i could have visitors” no they literally are from a different time now

Like i get the “i cant tell her no” but just explain the modern vs ancient world but maybe she could go visit them idk

Ep 16

Why are they not confused i feel like they are ignoring this whole thing rachel created

No her sisters have a point why did he not give her a name not even his real one

Dont hold the blade there is a handle girl

“How could you not trust me?” i wouldnt either gotta be honest

Eros is so melodramatic istg

Artemis and persephone are not having it and like mood

Artemis is lighter now

Yknow if she kept a color palette with just base colors and then did lighting it would work better but maybe im a lil lost

“Hey i got a phone” put ur name queen

Q&A 1

I wasnt gonna put anything for this but “i focus on details and seek out references for anatomy” girlie do you wanna. Start doing that again

Ep 17

Why is he just crying he can leave

“Woe is me” shut up Persephone

No it would suck to be sworn to maidenhood without her permission but also i dont think she understands what unrequited love is

“No one will ever love me like that” they might yall just cant do things

“And thats ok” is it??

“Little tart” good nickname tbh

Her eyes went blue but that will never happen again

Dont throw her list away eros

Emergency contacts you just got a phone??

“Im paying for everything so i get to pick” stfu eros

We will never see her wear this again

Do we ever see her wear the same outfit i cant remember

“Was he just humoring me” i mean hes also prolly busy

I know everyone says it but i hate that apollo is purple

Ep 18

Stop thinking of persephone like that its so weird hades

“As if she would want me to have her number” its not a business card made for you man

How do kings get banned genuinely like this is so wild rachel please show me the societal norm and class systems here

Haha so funny zeus is harassing someone -_-

What job would he give her honestly

How does the economy work you cant say that resell on gems is shit and not explain

Hades wow forcing them to accept a check youre so cool

This is locker room talk and i quite literally hate it

Ep 19

If hades doesnt want to discuss his sex life he is valid i wouldnt want to especially not to family

“Ok i can be a little bossy” this is a surprise tool thatll help up later

They are being good brothers here tho

Ew not the locker room talk again

Like even if she was his age or whatever its literally so gross

Hera!!!

Ep 20

Lil kore is so cute

I like their interactions

She has a point its disgusting

However, i hate, like loathe, the miscommunication plot device. Answer hades Hera so i dont have to deal with this

Also zeus shut up you dont speak for hades

Hera should know that she is getting angry at Zeus and then misdirecting her anger its so annoying

“Im well aware im a fool” can you guys just talk please

#anti lore olympus #my opinion #lore olympus #lore olympus critical #random thoughts #lo critical

[mizata]

The final profession of love

Dear you,

It's been a great 2 and a half years and i know it's been chock full of ups and downs, but that's life innit?

I can confidently say with 98.9% confidence that there've been more ups than downs, but this is the culmination of every moment we've been together.

I've seen you at your lowest, and i've seen you at your best, and there's so much to love about you, no matter what state you're in.

From improving communication skills with friends and family, to stepping out of your comfort zones to meet new people or challenge yourself career-wise. There has been so much objective growth and it's amazing.

There are so many qualities about you that i admire, be it the discipline to wake up everyday despite mental heaviness, or cultivating healthy habits for food or exercise. This was always something that i lacked myself and i was hoping to one day achieve that same level of self-discipline.

I've learnt so much about other necessary life skills like managing money, maintaining some semblance of cleanliness in the room, and traveling pointers. These are things that i never handled personally and i am eternally grateful for the opportunity to learn this through my time with you.

As i type this my eyes are welling up (for the 15th time today) and i may end up ugly crying and yelling into the very blanket that we iron out every day, but i know that this was necessary because it would not be fair to you (and to extent, us) if i let this continue.

I want to hold on to my principle of never having to lie to you. Not just because it's wrong morally and it's not the way mama raised me, but because lying here is the blade that causes the most hurt. And you've been hurt like that one too many times. You've been through so many struggles (most of which you had to deal with on your own), and i do not wish to be another person who disrespects you as a person with very real feelings and emotion.

You are incredibly precious and i wish i could take that night back, but i cant.

I cannot claim to understand how you're feeling now, or how you will be feeling in time to come, but i know that it'll get better in time. I too am still figuring out how to move forward with all this and i can only pen this down and process this carefully. This would be the first time i've had let someone so close to me go under such circumstances.

As i sieve through memories and memorabilia, i am yeeted back to the time where life was a lot simpler. We were both in hospitals, we were both excited to learn about each other and bringing the best out of each other. I will always cherish the little moments of weekend mornings, the times we danced to various genres of music, the times either of us stood at the doorway when the other had to leave for work, the moments that made my heart flutter, and the constant expressions of affection towards one another.

We made many plans and discussed the future in so many ways, and i've tried to be the better man for you. Of all the times i have failed you, this would definitely be my greatest failure. The last thing i wanted to do was make you feel any less than what you are, but i know that had happened regardless. Nothing i say now will change that fixed moment in time.  

There are so many things i wish i could say irl.

I wish i could say all of this (and more) to your face as you (probably) start to tear up (and so will i) because i want you to know how special you are to me.

I don't know if i should send this to you or just leave this here for you to chance upon for fear of hindering your healing, so i'll err on the side of caution and just leave this be.

I hope we can be allowed to still be friends (despite the opinion of some that we should stay separate), but if fate decides otherwise, then i have to accept it too.

You've taught me to live a little more, love a little harder, and be a better person overall.

Thank you. For letting me love you.

May you always have minimal pee and maximul rest bbkeks.

[nvmwc]

Well. It happened. I did it. I have been able to push it off for weeks. I packed around my kit. I’ve paced in tears in the bathroom. Pushing it off, staring at my kit on the counter. Behind a locked door i paced for about 20 mins. A knock at the door broke the focus. “I’m taking off my makeup” i yelled. Staring into my own eyes as tears fell down. Then i did just that. Cleaned off my beauty, staring at the raw naked face of what looks and feels like a ghost. I put my kit back in my purse put some eye drops in and came out smiling. Engaged in laughter and tv, intertwined limbs. His legs over mine and hand in hand. Then it happened of course. I had too many emotions. Couldn’t handle them. I had my own worst emotion cocktail. Anger and sadness together. I can push it off longer when it’s just sadness. But sadness and anger? That’s always the mixture that gets me. I ran to the bathroom to punish myself, to punish the world around me. I dumped my purse out frantically. Snatched my kit up and went for it. I did it. Eight times back to back to back. Until the pain on my skin outweighed the pain in my heart.

I thought it was over after that. But i should have known better. It’s been years. But i should have saw it coming. I cant stop now. It’s every trip to the bathroom, every time someone isn’t looking, every small uncomfortable emotion. I cant stop. I am raw and welted and scarred. And i cant stop. It’s bad this time. It’s all i think about now. It is mouthwatering. It’s an immediate fix. Everyone and everything that is hurting me. It goes away as soon as it hits my wrist.

I can’t stop. I’m running out of space. I almost can’t hide it. We shower together every day. But i have to learn to contort my body. Learn how to bath without him seeing. If he sees he’ll make me stop. He’ll take my kit away. It’s the only thing that’s helping. It makes me feel better and i don’t want to stop. So i will figure out how to hide it. I’ll shower with my back to him. Hold my arm close to my body. Keep my sleeves long. I’m doing it at work now. I did it when i parked this morning. Every time I’ve gone to the bathroom. On my lunch. And tonight once I get to my car and the parking lot is empty, I’ll do it again. Then I’ll call him talk on my way home like every day. Park somewhere further away from home for a minute and do it quickly before i walk in the house. If i do it when i park at home, his phone will tell him I’m home and if i take too long he always comes out to greet me. Can’t risk that. I can’t stop. I won’t.

[bpbpskpskp]

what if i just.. gave up one day? what if i just stopped trying? things would get so much easier. but theres people who have expectations for me. im held on a higher pedestal. if i fall off my throne i’ll only be greeted by disgrace. if i just stopped what would happen? im scared to think about it. but everyone is scared of the unknown. we always assume the worst. what if things got better? there would be so much less pressure. the weight in my shoulders would finally start to life. what if, the moment i give up on holding the weight on my back, it’ll have been held up by rope the entire time? what if i didn’t need to shoulder that burden? i just want to stop. i can’t. i built a reputation and a house made of concrete, if i stop, it’ll all be for nothing. everything would be wasted. i don’t want to waste my parents love. i want them to have a reason to love me. i don’t want to be left behind. i don’t want to be forgotten. what if it’s better that way? what if everyone would be happier with me gone? what if im the thing that’s holding all of my friends back from their full potential? i have to be of use to make sure everything was worth it. if i don’t, they’re going to be so disappointed in me. i can’t handle disappointment. i can’t, i truly can’t. i don’t want to. i have to. im going to break under the weight of my own expectations. im going to crumble under the weight of a coin. i need to be better. i don’t want to burn out yet. im not a star yet. i can’t become a supernova if i was never super. im just 13. IM JUST 13. IM STILL A FUCKING CHILD. WHY CANT I UNDERSTAND THAT. WHY DOES NOBODY UNDERSTAND THAT. A CHULD SHOULDNT HAVE TO CARRY THIS BLAME AND BURDEN AND ALL THESE EXPECTATIONS. I DONT WANT TO DO THIS. I SHOULDNT WANT TO LEAVE YET. I SHOULD BE MAKING INAPPROPRIATE JOKES WITH MY FRIENDS AND LAUGHING AT THE STUPIDEST THINGS. I SHOULD BE HAPPY. I SHOULD HAVE FUN. ALL I HAVE IS BOUNCING AROUND FRIEND GROUPS. ALL I HAVE IS GROWING UP TOO FAST. I SHOULDNT BE CRYING MYSELF TO SLEEP EVERY OTHER DAY. I SHOULDNT BE LIKE ME. I SHOULDNT KNOW ABOIT MOST THINGS I DO, yet i still do. why? why is that? why am i growing so much faster than everyone else? i shouldn’t feel alienated. i shouldn’t feel left out. im supposed to have friends. im supposed to be caught up with my schoolwork. i should be diligent. i should be humorous. i should be bright. i shouldn’t have to repress my emotions. i shouldn’t have to be afraid of showing off. i shouldn’t be afraid of criticism. why am i like this? am i a monster of their own creation or mine? am i wrong? was i not supposed to be born? i was loved. i was cherished. i need to be better than this. i can’t be angry or sad. what’s there to cry about? my teachers are understanding, i hip friend groups because im friends with everyone, my parents love me, my siblings are normal. why am i weird? i was always the weird kid. what if i ruin my relationships by being me? i don’t want to be gone, but sometimes i want to disappear. i want to be gone, just to see if they would cry for me. i want to see if they actually cared or if they did it to make me feel better. i want to see their true colours. i want to know who i could have trusted. i wonder. i want to lose contact with people. i can’t. i want to.