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#maybe over a year actually
grumpygayming · 2 years
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Matterino
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stoopidstapler · 9 months
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SO IVE BEEN GOIN INSANE SINCE THIS TRAILER DROPPED. JUST. SIMON. SIMON. SIMON.
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machinerot · 4 months
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heartorbit · 3 months
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i'm sending this endless melody to a nameless you
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you want a new kind of guy, fine, i raise you: the lady i was briefly roommates with in college who once smoked a blunt at a party and then spent an hour confessing earnestly to me that she genuinely preferred reading detailed episode recaps over actually watching the tv show in question
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rainbun · 1 month
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They did it guys!!
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I know this is just a silly bad quality random screencap of a screencap that I found on facebook lol, BUT it's a succinct enough image to easily describe the concept in a quick/accessible way hopefully :
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(and of course, feel free to elaborate in tags, etc.! (especially elaborating about other senses as well.. can you "hear" in your mind just as well as you can "see"? taste? etc.) It's an interesting topic to me, as someone who's like a 4.5 at MOST lol. I'm curious what option will be the most common :0c )
#tumblr polls#hrmm... a little poll perhaps.. about a subject I find interesting.. since this image came across my facebook today#still really not feeling that well. no longer shaking violently and such but I still feel weird and weak much more than usual#They did say my markers for like infection or inflammation were elevated but that they werent sure of the cause so hopefully#it's nothing too serious. they did also say a lot of different things can cause that thing to be higher than normal but didn't go into spec#fics of what. maybe some of them are relatively benign or something. I still havent felt much back to normal since#I got really sick that one time though. I feel fine on and off but then little bouts of feeling weird and sick happen. hrmmm#ANYWAY.. looking for small ways to be productive. such as little doodles on evil ipad or editing game videos#or posting polls or cat pictures or some other like not very labor intensive things#I WISH I COULD FOCUS on writing HHRGGhh... I need to finish my game.. it would be so freeing.. a project that's been looming#over my head for like 5 years even though througouht that 5yrs I've probably spent a total of 3 months working on it lo.. ANYWAY#I still partially really cannot beleive that people CAN see stuff in their heads. There's always part of me that's thinking like. well mayb#e everyone DOES see the same exact thing but we just describe/conceptualize it so differently that we think we're talking about#different things when we're really not. But I have been assured by people I've talked to about it that they can GENUINELY really see#stuff in their heads like as vivid as an actual picture in real life or something. And the other senses are neat too. Like for exmaple I#can hear in my head much better than I can see imagery. I still CANNOT hear vividly like as if I were listening to actual music out loud..#but I think it's developed more than my sight. AND interesting how this varies the creative process. a friend I was talking to on the phone#said they write by literally just watching stuff play before them like a movie. where my process is COMPLETELY different. AND that affects#the content/what details we focus on as well as our individual styles of writing have differences that can be traced back to that.. hrmm
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oobbbear · 7 months
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HAPPY 1 YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO OUR LITTLE GAY WITCH STORY!!!
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animalinvestigator · 8 months
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happy 8 years
i will transform so i don't die
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sea-buns · 3 months
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I don't think I really got the Aelwyn hype until she stopped being a villain and threatened her way into becoming a middle school teacher surrounded by cats but I fucking love Aelwyn
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luchiaketchum-art · 5 months
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they got me in a chokehold
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mumblesplash · 3 months
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hi your sculk post has me frothing at the mouth
What if it WAS warm and comfortable and soft and cosy
What if it also smelled nice, released attaching pheromones like those pitcher plants do, or the goo tasted sweet to lure creatures in
What if it wasn't a smell so much as an absence of the dank musty cave air, and it was a welcome breath of something cosy and comforting that just made you want to curl up and sleep
And then the sculk is soft underfoot, and it feels like it might be wet and slimy but it's actually kind of velvety, in that slightly coarse alive way that a living animal is soft and warm
And you're so tired from mining and exploring and damn wouldn't it be nice to just have a lie down and rest for a bit
And it's so soft and comforting, a bit weird but getting more agreeable by the second
Wouldn't it be nice to just.... Rest your eyes, and your legs.... And everything..... And just sleep.....
OH THE THING ABOUT THE SMELL IS SO GOOD
i really love the idea of it just smelling distinctly like Nothing, or just fresh air, you know that smell when you’re outside on a clear night in the summer and it’s almost-warm but not quite, that’s a smell you’d probably really miss after a long enough time underground
also the sculk does this hypnotic little animation where the little bright parts flicker in waves that could be part of the calming effect as well
but like YEAH the more i think about the more i'm into the idea that dormant sculk would be comforting. sculk not only eats the essence of formerly-living things, it grows in the shape of the places it spreads to. if you think of a more typical concept of an overgrown post-apocalyptic city you probably imagine lots of disruption, trees and vines widening cracks in streets and buildings crumbling, but sculk doesn't do that. your home could be completely eaten and it would still be standing there, you could still walk inside. and chances are that's on purpose
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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year
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Hey! I love your writing so much so I figured I’d send a little request!
Could you doing something like Steve hase always noticed Eddie but Eddie is completely oblivious? With some first kiss/love confession?
OH ANYTIME!!! Thank you :) I am always here for pining and love confessions. The sappier, the better. The more nauseating, the better. The more I want to punch a wall, the better. I hope that happens here for you with this one! - Mickala ❤️
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Steve Harrington’s bisexual awakening was Eddie Munson.
He was 14 years old at summer camp for the last time because “teenagers just don’t go to summer camp, Steven.” Which was ridiculous because it was a summer camp for teenagers, but whatever, not worth arguing with his father about.
Eddie was there, hair longer than most of the other boys, floppy and curly like he was trying to grow it out but didn’t know how to manage it.
If there was anything Steve could do, it was manage hair.
So he walked up to him and offered to show him his routine.
Eddie laughed, honest to god tears falling from his eyes as he slapped his leg.
Steve just stared at him, not used to being laughed at, only with.
But Eddie seemed to sense that he was serious, so he calmed down, but kept a small smile on his face.
“Thanks man, but I can’t afford the shit you do. I just gotta deal with it.”
“I mean, you can have mine at the end of camp if you want. I’ll just buy more.”
Which felt like the right thing to say, but Eddie just looked down at the ground and shook his head.
“Nah. Don’t really need your charity, dude.”
He walked away before Steve could explain it wasn’t charity, he just really like his curls and wanted him to take care of them.
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It was hard not to notice Eddie at school. He made sure he was noticed.
Everyone said it was because he was a “fairy” and thrived off the attention, even when he was getting beat up.
One particularly nasty rumor said he liked being beat up.
So when 15 year old Steve heard all this, he obviously knew he couldn’t ever say a damn thing about himself or any interaction he’d had with Eddie.
Which was really just the one time he’d accidentally insulted him.
His hair was longer now, just past his chin. The curls looked a bit better, though Steve could tell he didn’t use any type of conditioner, and he tried not to let that bother him.
He watched him though, secretly, when he could get away with it. In the halls or the cafeteria was easiest since he could always say he was staring at a girl if someone asked.
The way he just always walked with his head high, his confidence unlike anything Steve had seen from anyone that wasn’t a jock, made Steve’s stomach flutter.
He heard Carol say “confidence is sexy” enough times to start believing it was true, and that was before he watched Eddie strut around the school like he wasn’t constantly being thrown insults.
He watched as Eddie formed his own little ragtag group of friends, all outcasts because of one thing or another, only building his confidence more.
He watched as Eddie started driving a beat up van to school, making a name for himself as the guy who would sell liquor out of the back on Fridays.
People still teased him, still beat him up, but they were giving him money for liquor for their house parties left and right.
Steve watched.
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Nancy was amazing, everything Steve wanted and everything his parents wanted.
She was going to have an incredible future, and encouraged Steve to work hard to have one too.
He loved her. He did.
But he still watched Eddie.
Eddie who was standing on tables in the cafeteria, giving speeches that honestly, weren’t that dramatic. Maybe if he was anyone else, people would actually listen.
Eddie who started dealing weed in the woods behind school a few days a week, admitting the liquor thing wasn’t for him when he saw how many idiot kids still got behind the wheel to drive home after the parties he supplied.
Eddie who was unapologetically himself in all the ways Steve wished he could be.
Nancy was beautiful, she was smart, she was determined.
But Eddie was like a forest fire, a small spark that ignited with just a small fan of the flame, his best qualities hidden behind the smoke.
And Steve wanted to burn.
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Steve graduated. Eddie didn’t.
He didn’t get into college, so his dad made him get a summer job.
Eddie didn’t really hang out at the mall, wasn’t really his scene, but he did come into Scoops occasionally, and apparently only when Steve worked.
His coworker, Robin, rolled her eyes when Steve insisted on scooping his ice cream into the cone, ringing him out at the register, and watching him walk out.
“Are you poisoning him slowly or something? Are you planning on doing something stupid? What’s happening?”
He never told her anything, just shrugged in response.
Until the Russians. Until their stupid truth serum made him spill his guts literally and figuratively in the mall bathroom.
Robin listened as he talked about every moment, every look, every doubt he ever had about his feelings. About how he loved Nancy, he did, but she would never be the one he thought of first when someone talked about a future, about love, about a life.
Robin listened as he cried, sobbed really, explained how he knew it would never happen, but it didn’t stop him from wanting.
She listened until she couldn’t anymore.
“Steve, you’re not alone in this okay? I’m…You know Tammy?”
“Thompson?” He sniffled, finally looking up at Robin.
“Yeah. I’ve had a crush on her for like, two years.”
“What? Really?”
“Yeah.”
“But why her? She’s kind of awful.”
Robin laughed, a real laugh, not a drug-induced one.
“Yeah, but she’s also kind of not.”
Steve nodded.
“I know what you mean.”
They were trauma bonded, sure, but they were also just bonded through life’s fucked up ways of bringing people with similar qualities and interests together.
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If Steve knew the next time he saw Eddie Munson would be when he was wanted for murder, a small part of him actually may have believed you.
Not because he thought Eddie was actually a murderer, but more because he knew what the town thought of him, and would have expected nothing less in the face of the unexplainable.
The three-time senior was kind of fucked if they didn’t figure this out, looking at a lifetime in prison for a murder he didn’t commit.
Steve focused on thinking about that anytime his mind wandered to how Eddie held a broken bottle to his neck, his other hand pushing him back, his leg between Steve’s to keep him there.
Robin pinched him when she could see his mind starting to drift. She was the best.
And as they worked to figure things out, and fight their way through Vecna’s curse, Steve managed to have actual conversations with Eddie.
They weren’t really ever completely alone, no one was while they were figuring things out and making a plan, but they still managed to talk.
It was enough for Steve. Enough to know he could maybe be friends with him when this was over and done. Maybe go to his graduation, maybe help him leave the town that was ready to burn him at the stake.
He didn’t expect it to be it. To be all he got.
So when he saw Dustin sobbing over a bloody body, he didn’t waste time. He had Nancy put pressure on the worst of the wounds, made Robin get Dustin out, he needs to go, started begging, pleading quietly with Eddie to just survive.
“You can’t let the fire burn out yet, idiot. Not now, not like this.”
Nancy didn’t acknowledge what he was saying, but he knew she knew.
He was tearing his shirt into pieces, makeshift bandages the only option for holding him together as Steve found a way to carry him to the trailer and through the gate.
It wasn’t easy, but nothing about any of their Upside Down trauma had been, and Eddie was worth it.
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Steve waited hours.
Then he waited days.
When a week had gone by, Wayne pulled him into a hug and practically begged him to go home and get some rest.
“Our boy will wake up and we wanna look our best when he does, right?”
He couldn’t really argue with Wayne, not when he’d let him sit by Eddie’s bed with him for days.
He didn’t tell Wayne about his feelings, didn’t really know if Wayne was a safe person to tell, but he figured Wayne knew anyway.
When he managed to sleep for a few hours in his own bed, shower in his own bathroom, and eat an actual cooked meal, he found his way back to Eddie’s room. The nurses no longer paid any attention once Owens and his government buddies cleared Eddie’s name.
He walked into the same scene he’d watched for a week now; Eddie asleep, hooked up to more machines that any human should have to, chest rising and falling slowly.
But Wayne hadn’t made it back yet, hopefully getting more sleep than Steve had been able to.
So he took the chair closest to Eddie’s head, gently brushing some of his hair from his face and reaching down to hold his hand.
Even like this, bruises and scars littering his body and face, he was beautiful.
His fire was still burning, Steve could see it.
He managed to fall asleep like that, holding Eddie’s less injured hand in his, head on the bed against his leg.
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A hand in his hair woke him up.
Expecting it to be Wayne or Robin, he blinked his eyes open and slowly sat up, ready for another long day of waiting.
But it wasn’t Wayne or Robin.
“Eddie!”
Steve resisted throwing himself at him, knowing he would be in pain, but he let his hands hover over him to show he wanted to.
“Hey Stevie.”
God, his voice was so nice. It was like actual music to his ears. He never wanted to go so long without hearing it again.
“How long have you been awake? Do you need the nurse? Pain meds? Where is the pain?”
Eddie chuckled quietly, small smile visible under his oxygen mask.
“I don’t really know but the pain is everywhere.”
“Shit, okay. Let me go get someone. I don’t even know who’s on shift right now. I don’t know how long I slept.”
“Stevie.”
“Yeah?”
“Calm down.”
Steve let out a disbelieving laugh, barely more than a huff of air.
“You almost died, Eddie! And you’re hurting. I almost-” Steve choked on a wet sob, his throat closing up as tears flooded his eyes.
“You didn’t though. You saved me. I’m here right?”
Eddie’s voice was barely above a whisper, and it clearly pained him to even talk, but he was doing it for Steve.
Steve suddenly realized there was far too much space between them, that if he wasn’t feeling the heat of Eddie’s flames against his skin, he couldn’t convince himself he was still alight.
He gently sat on the edge of the bed, taking Eddie’s hand back in his own.
“I almost didn’t make it in time. You were so pale, Eds. So bloody.”
“But you did. You made it.”
Steve took a shaky breath.
He knew he needed to say it. He needed to tell Eddie why he did everything he could to save him, why he hasn’t left his side except at Wayne’s insistence, why he was panicking so much now.
Eddie squeezed his hand.
“Stevie, you think I didn’t see you watching me? I started to think you were gonna kill me sometimes with how often you just stared at me.” Eddie took a few breaths, closing his eyes as he focused on what he wanted to say and not the pain. “I figured it out there. After Nancy. That’s why I came to Scoops so much. Loved that little outfit.”
Eddie was smirking at him and Steve let out a snort.
“I hated that thing. Robin did too.”
“Don’t think I didn’t notice that Robin never helped me when I came in either. It was always you.”
Steve couldn’t look at him, not while he was being seen so clearly.
“And all this? With the monsters and crazy people in this town trying to kill me? But you were the quickest to believe me. The one making sure I wasn’t going crazy. And then the one who got me out of there alive, even though I didn’t think there was any way I would.”
“Why didn’t you stick to the plan? You could’ve escaped with Dustin, been safe.”
“Because the world couldn’t lose Steve Harrington.”
“It couldn’t lose Eddie Munson, either.”
Eddie shook his head.
“I think you’re the only one who feels that way.”
“Really? You think Dustin could have handled losing you? Or Mike? He’s a shit, but he cares. And me? How was I supposed to?”
“Steve…”
“No! You don’t get to decide that you don’t matter to people. Everyone loves you and everyone would have been devastated to lose you. Wayne’s been sitting in this stupid plastic chair for a week waiting for you to wake up. You think he would have been okay with losing you?”
“Eventually, yeah.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“I’ve heard.”
Steve shook his head.
“How do you not see how much people love you?”
“I could ask you the same thing.”
Steve didn’t quite know what to say to that. It’s not that he believed he was expendable, it’s just that if it came down to someone having to die, he’d rather it be him. Not to play hero, but because picturing anyone else dying was too much to bear.
“You’re loved, too. Every single one of those kids love you like a brother. Robin would probably marry you if you had boobs. I was willing to die to keep you safe, Steve. How can you not see it?”
“It wasn’t just me.”
“No. I wanted all of you to be safe. But I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t the thought of you dying that made me cut the rope.”
“Why?”
“Because I watched you, too. All the time. I did things for your attention. I thought that was obvious.”
Steve shook his head. No way he was telling the truth. He constantly ranted about the popular kids, about how much he hated them and everything they represented. The hierarchy of high school continued into life and he wanted no part of it.
Eddie groaned as he adjusted a bit in the bed.
“I may need to continue this later, Stevie.”
“Yeah. Yeah, of course. Let me get the nurse,” Steve muttered as he got up.
The nurse bustled in only a minute later, followed by Steve, who thought through the entire conversation he just had with Eddie.
Did Eddie…like him?
No way. He couldn’t possibly like Steve. He hated the whole King Steve thing. He’d said so multiple times over the years.
But so did Steve.
He zoned out while the nurse asked Eddie questions and checked his vitals, thinking back to all the times he’d been watching Eddie in school.
How almost every time, Eddie had already been watching him.
How Eddie’s theatrics always waited until Steve was in the same room.
How Eddie glared at Nancy, even when she was helping him.
Steve watched as the nurse put a new bag on his IV pole, explaining to him that this would be a morphine drip that would probably knock him out for another 12-24 hours.
He watched Eddie nod along, past the point of caring what was happening and just wanting the pain to stop.
The nurse finally left, and Steve didn’t wait.
He walked over to the bed, leaning over Eddie.
“You are an idiot,” Steve said, leaning in closer to his lips, grateful that the nurse had removed the oxygen mask and replaced it with a small nasal cannula.
“Am I?’ Eddie asked with a smirk, the lids of his eyes slowly getting heavier.
“Yeah. And I can’t believe I love an idiot so much.”
Eddie’s eyes widened for a second before they started to close again.
“You gonna kiss the idiot or make him fall asleep without one?”
Steve rolled his eyes, but leaned in to place a soft kiss on Eddie’s dry and cracked lips.
Eddie smiled into it, but didn’t seem to have the energy to kiss back right now.
Steve pulled away and rested his forehead against Eddie’s, gently, like he would break if he put too much of himself against him.
“You owe me a good one when you’re not high on morphine, deal?”
“Mhm. Deal, sweetheart.”
Steve blushed at the name, but Eddie’s eyes were closed.
Wayne walked in only a few minutes later, eyes wide.
“The nurse said he was awake?”
Steve nodded from his spot in the chair, Eddie’s hand in his, fond smile on his face.
“Yeah, she gave him morphine so he can rest some more.”
“Good,” Wayne visibly relaxed. “He tell you he’s in love with you yet or do I have to keep waitin’?”
“Well, not in so many words, but, kinda.”
“And you? You told him?”
“I called him an idiot.”
“Close enough.”
Steve laughed. It felt so good to laugh.
Eddie’s fire had spread quickly, the smoke clearing away just enough to let Steve be engulfed in his flames.
Steve was burning, and it was everything he hoped it would be.
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writeouswriter · 2 years
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The curse has lifted (finally wrote more than like 10 words on something)
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sergle · 5 months
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me in the aforementioned "I talked about this earlier" convo
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puppyeared · 5 months
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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