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paperstarwriters · 3 months

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Billowing Fabrics

ouagh. I wouldn't typically post a fic like this lmao I feel like it's kinda underbaked so to say? but deadline is coming in and I don't have the leisure to leave the fic to just bake in my WIP file like I do with other fics 🥲 Not a bad thing neccicarily but if the fic isn't as perfectly polished that's why lol.

anyways,

Pairing: Muriel x reader (romantic)

Warnings: N/a

Summary: You've accidentally made one of your sweaters a little too big when you were trying to make it bigger and slouchier for yourself. Muriel finds your work and takes it upon himself to fix the worn down sweater. Not for any particular reason no, no... he just found a sweater that seemed to fit him....

Vesuvia Weekly Prompt | Masterlists | The Arcana Masterlist

Word count: 1,426

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The objective is a complicated one, but it was supposed to be simple with the aid of magic.

The spell is a simple one, but the objective you want to achieve has made it overly complicated.

You wanted a longer sweater for the upcoming months something long on the lower end with equally long sleeves to tuck your hands and legs into when it got particularly cold, turning yourself into a ball of soft fabrics—a sponge of soft fabrics when you inevitably leaned against Muriel.

There were a handful of well failed attempts that you've since set aside to mess around with later with the help of some borrowed yarn from Portia , or attempts that near destroyed the sweater you were working on. Thankfully the bunch you've targeted using, were either sweaters that have already been worn to bits and a handful of cheaply bought sweaters for more experimentation.

From the various failed attempts you have one sweater that ended up with sleeves so long you could use it for a scarf. Another attempt stole fabric from the sleeves to lengthen the torso portion, and one of the attempts had simply made the woolen material far, far, far too thick to work with. Each were an interesting discovery in their own right of course, with the latter one in particular being added as a possible adjustment you would like to make to your end result. Not as thick as the material at hand of course, but something akin to that amount.

Beneath your fingers the well worn fabric of one of your more damaged sweaters stretches and expands. Fabric spills over your lap, as threads twist and turn growing thicker or longer depending on your desires, and as the light finally dims from it's passage through your fingertips and into the very fibers of the sweater you find yourself with a substantially larger and thicker sweater, fluffy and soft, though a little too big around the collar, and the sleeves seemed a pinch too loose. Practically perfect though! You promptly turn your attention to the target sweater you're intent on changing setting aside the successful practice to join the other attempts and work at slowly expanding the sweater. It doesn't take long before your sweater is now larger and comfier and fluffier around you, and very eagerly, you dash out of the hut intent on showing off your new creation.

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Muriel returns, to the pleasantly warm confines of the hut. You're still outside, having gone on a quick trip to the marketplace, to go grab some groceries intent on getting the most important goods before the worst of an upcoming snowstorm hit. Snow wasn't exactly common in Vesuvia but on the odd occasion a wash of cold weather sweeps through, sometimes bringing snow, sometimes only bringing ice. While Muriel felt far more comfortable than most in the cold chilly temperatures, he knew full well he wasn't exactly a good example of an average citizen and though he knew how to manage his way through frost and snow, getting extra groceries was always a good help.

Extra cuddly items like sweaters and blankets couldn't hurt either.

Noticing the pile of thick fabric materials Muriel pokes his way through your failed attempts. You very eagerly showed off your brand new sweater, or well, old-ish sweater with brand new measurements. Made to protect even better against the cold beneath a water and wind proof cape. While you had tried to explain your process to him, bouncing around with glee at your success, Muriel found it difficult to imagine how you had been able to change the fabric to somehow create more of itself.

His hands stop at the sight of one sweater, well worn, and almost tearing at the seams. There's a little hole around the chest, and the sleeves seem to be moth-bitten, and he wonders how long you've had this. It's a much bigger size, clearly a victim of your testing for your sweater, and as he holds it up into the air to inspect it more, he finds it to almost fit his own size.

Tugging the fabric over his head, Muriel is greeted by a wash of scent. You've worn this sweater a lot surely. Perhaps as casual wear at some point of time. He recalls dimly seeing you wear it around the hut on the odd occasion, and though he feels slightly bad, he takes a moment to appreciate the feeling of being wrapped in something that smells so strongly of you.

When he finally pulls the sweater down, he finds the fabric fits him like a glove. No slouchiness or poofiness that you seemed so fond of in your own sweater, but it fits him, and it fits him well, even if there are a few odd holes amidst the seams.

Muriel takes off the sweater, setting it aside atop of your shared bed before he goes digging in the shelves of your stuff. Portia had lent the both of you some yarn at some point, if he recalled, perhaps he could patch a hole in this.

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Muriel returns home a little later than you, and though you're curious to see what he's done while you were out helping Asra and hauling groceries, the question escapes you when you actually see him. Patched with little hearts Muriel wears your old and tattered sweater, the one you made a little too large for you, but perfectly fits him.

And when he walks in the door, he stops, stares, and drops the knitting tools he's likely borrowed from Portia.

And in typical fashion, his face grows pink

"Is that my...?" you barely finish your question before Muriel sputters his reply.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't.... There were a bunch of holes in it and...." Though you try to hide it, try to bite your lips and cover your mouth to hide your grin, there's no mistaking the delight and glee that fills your cheeks, as you grin. Just seeing it Muriel seems to grow worse, face growing redder and redder. "I... Uh.... I didn't ........... It was just there.........and I just thought..........."

You don't say anything, no longer finding any need to hide and instead unabashedly grinning from ear to ear, pleased as punch at the sight of Muriel wearing your clothes. It fits him so nicely, you're almost upset you hadn't thought of doing so yourself.

He goes quiet in reply, staring down at the floor as smoke seems to puff from his ears, while Inanna rolls her eyes behind him and starts headbutting him in through the door. He scrambles to pick up his things at the gesture closing the door and keeping the chill from filling your little home.

Still he tries not to look at you. And yet you can't help but poke and prod.

"Is it comfy?"

He almost jumps at the question. "I.... Yeah. It's really soft and....." His mouth snaps shut with a faint click of his teeth, as he returns to busying himself with putting away the tools Portia let him borrow.

It's just a few tools, in any other scenario, he'd just set them on the shelf and sort it out later, there was no need for him to hem or haw over any container to put them into.

He just doesn't want to look at you right now, doesn't want to see the grin you have at seeing him in your clothes or at what he almost—

"and what?"

He doesn't have to reply, but you both know he will anyways.

With a soft and tepid voice, Muriel turns to just glance at you from the corner of his eye. "It..... It smells nice."

He doesn't say "it smells like you," but you both know that's what he means, and though you can't quite manage a pout around your grin you still lift up the sleeves of your sweater, and open your arms up to him.

"Aww, could you help me make mine smell nice as well?"

And though red faced, and still blushing, Muriel finally turns to you with a smile. How could he not? The prospect of a hug far too enticing, though he still tries to look away to hide it.

Curling up into your arms as his own come up to wrap around you, the both of you find the overwhelming warmth... Pleasant.

Outside it's frigid, icy and cold.

Inside, it's toasty and warm beneath your blanket like sweaters, and the feeling of being totally engulfed the presence of each other.

#x reader #reader insert #Muriel x reader #Muriel the arcana #Muriel #the arcana muriel #the arcana muriel x reader #the arcana #Muriel the mountain man #Muriel the hermit #muriel of the kokkhuri #muriel arcana #muriel the hermit #vesuvia weekly #borrowing clothes

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xaharadesert · 3 months

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ASMR Artists (Modern AU)- Headcanon

Arcana Characters (Main 6)

A/N: I am so tired

❤️Julian❤️

Plague Doctor Takes Care of You (You Have The Black Plague) ASMR Roleplay

He starts his channel as a joke, but has fun with it and decides to keep going

Besides, a little extra income is more than welcome for a med student

None of his videos are serious; they’re all ultra specific and completely ridiculous

Minimal tingles, but people most watch him because he’s funny anyway

🧡Portia🧡

Hair care & gossip ASMR

No one knows whether the gossip is real or not

(It is, but it’s so elaborate that people assume that it can’t be real)

Teaches people how to take care of their curls

Pepi can always be heard in the background

Does lots of hair brushing and various styles; her videos are super calming and great to fall asleep to

She makes lots of compilations by request because most of her videos are on the shorter side

💛Lucio💛

Mukbang ASMR with super expensive foods

Only does livestreams because he likes to suddenly make really loud noises to jumpscare his audience

He’s mostly famous for controversies and being a troll, so the quality of his content does not really matter

A lot of people start watching him because he’s an attractive white guy and they’re willing to defend him to their last breath

Also gets a lot of hate watchers, but he still makes money from the interactions, so he doesn’t care

💚Muriel💚

Story time ASMR, usually beside his fireplace

Asra talked him into it, but Muriel ends up liking the sort of limited social interaction where he doesn’t actually have to see anyone face to face

He never shows his face, but he gets more than enough fans from his voice alone

He usually reads children’s books by request, but sometimes he reads longer ones for parts of a series

Ends up way more popular than he intended: people sponsor him to read their books in his videos, and he’s a bit worried he’s gonna mess up somehow

Sometimes collabs with Nadia on books with lots of female characters (she’s great at voices)

💙Asra💙

Soooo many magic roleplay ASMR series

Fairies, merpeople, vampires, sorcerers, etc, he’s done them all

Big fan of wood soup

Doesn’t do a lot of actual magic or witchcraft in his videos because it feels disingenuous to make up readings for a large audience

Usually adds a disclaimer just in case

Always has themed makeup, nails, and hair, and always looks gorgeous

Barely uploads because he’s got a dozen other hobbies, but when he does it’s usually a couple hours long

💜Nadia💜

Personal attention ASMR

Skincare, makeup, and hair brushing are her favourites, but she also does affirmations whenever she’s having a hard day

The videos are for her as much as they’re for her followers, since she’s super busy single-handedly running her own business

Likes to use her platform to bring attention to current world issues, and usually has segments at the end of her videos to shout out specialists and dedicated activists for her followers to check out

Preaches about mental health, but reminds her followers not to close themselves off from the world around them

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favficbirthdays · 8 months

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Happy Birthday

Muriel (10th September)

The Arcana

#the arcana #the arcana muriel #muriel the arcana #arcana muriel #muriel arcana #muriel #fictional birthday #september #september 10th

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totallyy-not-charlie · 1 month

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The idea of a very dramatic Muri in a dark setting holding a chicken was beyond too good for me not to draw

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evisen · 2 years

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wanna hold him in my arms so bad

(tumblr got me banned for some time but i haven't drawn anything anyway so)

#the arcana game #the arcana #muriel #muriel arcana

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thearcanawearcrocs · 5 months

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As a poly person myself I find the potential dynamics of an mc who is dating two or more of the main 6 fascinating so I’ve decided to rank them. For simplicity’s sake I’ve decided to only do the dynamic of an mc dating two of the main 6 for now but I’m happy to make more later if people are interested

Asra and Nadia

Interesting but I see them more as friends

I think they would both be eager to provide mc with anything they could possibly want

Nadia clearly values Asra’s opinion and they have a mutual respect and friendship

I think they could pretty easily share mc

4/10

Asra and Julian

These two have a lot of history together

I think it would be fascinating to watch them rekindle their old relationship but this time with more healthy and open communication and under better circumstances

Julian and Asra bonding as two people who have given everything to keep you alive/bring you back

Overall I really enjoy this one

Lots of potential for angst

9/10

Asra and Muriel

Childhood besties who only have each other for so long and now they are both dating the same person? Absolutely

I love the idea of mc dating both of them

It makes a lot of sense for them to become a triad

I think it would be a very positive experience for everyone involved

10/10

Asra and Portia

This would be fun but I personally don’t see a lot of romance coming with it

Asra and Portia would be adventure buddies and drag mc across the earth to show them the world

I think Faust and Pepi would get along

3/10

Asra and Lucio

Now this is fascinating to me

These two do not like each other at all in canon and have had almost no positive interactions

However I find the idea of them strangely compelling

I think it a world where mc chose Lucio it would be neat to watch Asra struggle to put aside his own feelings about Lucio to keep his apprentice close

It would get messy but honestly that’s part of what makes it interesting

7/10

Nadia and Julian

Another one that I think would come fairly easily

Nadia and Julian have chemistry in canon and I don’t think either one of them would object to mc also being in the mix

As countess Nadia can afford to take care of two partners

5/10

Nadia and Muriel

This one’s cute

Nadia who lives to shower her loved ones in gifts and luxury vs Muriel who struggles to believe he deserves basic comfort

You can’t tell me Nadia wouldn’t love to slip away into the woods from time to time to get away from the stress of her work

Also Nadia proving herself to be nothing like Lucio as a leader and taking steps to correct the issues in the city that hurt Muriel most

9/10

Nadia and Portia

I mean yeah absolutely

The two of them already fall in love in routes where mc doesn’t choose either of them so why wouldn’t they also fall in love in a route where mc did?

The trust and affection they already have for one another would be a pretty solid foundation to add mc to

10/10

Nadia and Lucio

I mean they were once married

Nadia would hold Lucio to his word and encourage his efforts to make amends for what he’s done wrong

I think she is one of the main 6 who would be able to forgive him fully with enough time and if she saw him putting in real effort

I also love the idea of her knowing Lucio the way he was before dying and being able to truly see and appreciate the difference

Lucio seems to harbor no real ill will towards Nadia either and I think they could make peace with one another

7/10

Julian and Muriel

The loudest most dramatic man you know breaks down the door of the most introverted quiet guy in existence

This can only end well

I think that they honestly would end up getting along but it would take a while

They would balance each other out in some respects

I think they would also eventually bond over trauma. They both lost their families at a young age, were both hurt by Lucio and have permanent physical marks of that trauma, and both struggle to see themselves as worthy of good things

If they don’t kill each other in the first month I think they could be great together

8/10

Julian and Portia

I mean they’re siblings so

I guess mc could just be dating both separately but that still feels weird to me

0/10

Julian and Lucio

I love these two together a lot

Julian “I only consider others and never myself” devorak meets Lucio “I only consider myself and not others” morgasson

It would be so incredibly messy

They will absolutely hurt one another but I think they may also help one another grow a great deal

They are both very dramatic and passionate and would play off one another well

10/10

Muriel and Portia

This is cute

I think Portia would be incredibly understanding

Her constant optimism and belief in those around her would be very good for Muriel I think

Also they are both animal lovers which is important

7/10

Muriel and Lucio

Oh god no

I don’t think Muriel ever could (or really ever should) forgive Lucio for what he’s done to him

I love Lucio but what he did to Muriel is beyond fucked and I truly could not see the two of them ever being able to be so much a friends

Could be an interesting dynamic to play with in a dark fic though

1/10

Portia and Lucio

Lucio would be like her silly little guy

I think Portia would be fine with having him around

Lucio would think she was a lot of fun

Portia is the character who was hurt by lucio the least and so I believe she would be one of the first to be able to forgive him

6/10

#the arcana #arcana #lucio #count lucio #the arcana lucio #muriel #the arcana muriel #julian #julian devorak #the arcana julian #the arcana nadia #nadia satrinava #portia devorak #muriel arcana #asra arcana

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mjart12699 · 1 month

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Love how Muriel went from “I’ll be a coward if it means keeping MC safe” to “I’ll be exactly how people saw me, how I saw myself, a monster, to keep MC safe” in his reversed end

#the arcana #arcana game #the arcana headcanons #muriel arcana #muriel of the kokhuri #the arcana muriel #muriel the hermit #artists on tumblr #the arcana au #the arcana muriel fanart #muriel x mc #muriel 🧸🌿#muriel the mountain man #muriel x reader #muriel the arcana #muriel #Muriel of the Khokuri #late night thoughts

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hexgirllovesyou · 7 months

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The only time Muriel smiled a bit to Julian

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pinesepia · 1 year

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The shape of these dudes

#alpine #muriel #alpine the apprentice #muriel of the kokhuri #muriel the arcana #muriel arcana #the arcana #the arcana game #art #illustration #artists on tumblr #ibispaint x

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totally-not-here-for-the-smut · 8 months

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Can't stop thinking that after what some of the M6 went through, trauma must have taken his toll on their intimacy. I have some headcanons about how the M6 handle their trauma in smut-fluff situations. Idk, it seems "wrong" to just ignore the fact? We didn't often get the chance to read some trauma-handling that isn't "oooh I couldn't stand the idea of sex but ☆magic love☆ healed me in just one thrust!"

Please note: Not meant to be realistic, let alone feticize it, it's just something that resonates with my idea of them. I'm no professional and didn't experience first hand most of this but if you did and doesn't rub you right please let me know and I'll try to do better.

So here's my headcanons about ~

Handling Trauma

Muriel ♧

Muriel doesn't mind nudity per se. Being shame about it something tied to social modesty, and him being a mountain hermit, it feels kinda natural to him.

But seeing entwined bodies? That's awful for him. The touch, the musle tension, the groping and the expressions, the sight of skin and flesh bending under his hands and a body pressed under him... no.

That's too much, too similar to wrestling for your life. He can't stand it.

... which is very difficult, given that he'd want to hold you tight, drawn his loneliness into your scent and be one with you.

So, you started slowly. Lights off (easy thing in his hut), you touching gently his chest, tracing his features with the lighest strokes.

He touched you as if you were a bubble ready to burst. His caresses were like leaves falling on your naked body, barely heavier than his warm breath on you.

Way later, the two of you discovered that he enjoyed using his lips way more than his hands - that didn't brought anything horrible back to his memory. Your -and his- bodies became maps to be traced with kisses and lingering sighs of desire.

He wanted to see you come, for he needed to see that those body of his was capable of giving pleasure and not just pain. You had to lie still on the furs of his bed, tights spread open to not make him feel chocked between them, your hands in his hair like a breeze.

Coming under his tongue left you shaking, grasping at the furs for comfort. You hurled in a ball, with a racing heart and short breaths that made you look so beautiful in your fragility that he couldn't help to - finally- lay beside you, taking you between his arms.

It's not like that night solved everything, but now the darkness of his hut is heavy with your moans. He still can't bear the sight of your body writhe against his, but now his hands knows all the mountains and valleys of your body, tracing the paths he came to know by heart. Now your curves melts into his, as the patience you took to know each other carved them as water on stone.

Does it work? Idk, I'll keep adding to it if I feel like it does

#i'm not great at this but i hope i did alright #muriel smut #muriel fluff #the arcana game #the arcana muriel #the arcana #muriel arcana #muriel the hermit #muriel x reader smut #muriel x gn!reader #muriel x mc #the arcana smut #trauma healing

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thatdeadidiot · 7 months

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"ran into the dude who chopped my arm off and offered him a drink" normal things Culler has said to Asra who groans so loudly into his hands it alerts the neighborhood watch

#my art #muriel of the kokhuri #muriel arcana #culler #the arcana game #culler is out here like. oh dude same trauma? lets be friends #and muriel is like. you are literally a victim of me being the scourge in the coliseum #and shes like. okay?? does this mean we can still be friends or-

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paperstarwriters · 3 months

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When Things Go Wrong (Feat. Inanna)

I know the larger trend is to lean comedy, but I couldn't help myself lmao. Also oof, the fic ended up with a lot less focus on things going wrong and a lot more focus on repair. Whoops lmao Pairing: Inanna & Reader (Platonic; familial), Muriel & Reader (Platonic, though could also be viewed as romantic)

Warnings: slight angst, hurt/comfort, Reader deals with feelings of inadequacy, Inanna acts a lot like Muriel.

Summary: Inanna had lost her pack once before, but here, she found a new pack with you and Muriel. It's small, but it's hers, and she will do what she can to protect every member of this little pack. So, when things go wrong, she has to fix it.

Vesuvia Weekly Prompt | Masterlists | The Arcana Masterlist Word Count: 4,085

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"And? When it all goes wrong, what will you do?"

When Inanna was a pup, she would have flashed her teeth in a terrifying snarl, gnash her jaws and howled her answer: "Fight! I would fight, I will fight!" But that is the bark of a child, of a pup, though she knows many grown wolves who would yowl the same sentiment.

Perhaps she shouldn't treat this as if she was somehow wiser. After all, it is wise for a wolf to solve problems with their fellows in a wolfish manner. The predicament occurs when you're dealing with a not-wolf-pack. Two strange magicians with one that too often loves to leave the pack and explore like an overeager puppy, while the other stumbles around occasionally like a newborn. Of course, then there was the snake, mischievous in the same way their wandering puppy magician was, and yet somehow much worse from their small intimidating size, and ability to slip behind and between and into things, without other people knowing. It's terrifying sometimes to see a snake and fear for your life only to realize it's your friend, covered in mud, intent on scaring you to death.

There were others as well, the tall slim bird-man. who sometimes had the face of a bird with cold unblinking eyes which he could somehow remove and leave on a wall, with his own raven friend who freaked out at the slightest inconvenience. There was the soft one, with her tiny little cat, who blinked and "meep!"ed at random intervals and fascinated Inanna to no end, unless she got angry which made her far more terrifying.

There was the wispy one, dressed in spiderwebs with an owl by her side. Inanna liked the owl, for their conversations, but she could never get around the sight of it turning it's head all the way around to stare her down. She's tried it before, it's very very hard to do, and yet the owl can do it without even blinking. Not to mention how irritatingly silent she can be sometimes as she flies around them.

Ah, but in short, they were an eclectic bunch, and though they didn't stay as closely together as a typical pack would, they were close enough, visiting often and being kind to each other. Especially her familiar, and the stumbling magician-ling. Muriel rolled his eyes at the title she gave you. Magician-ling, as if you were a newborn magician. She knew that wasn't true, but she thought it was a fonder title than, the undead. Muriel certainly seemed to prefer it.

Muriel certainly seemed to prefer you.

She remembers the delight in watching the two of you grow close, how you seemed to open the floodgates of connection and re-established his ability to find solace in a pack, to have friends, to have fellows he could rely on. Perhaps not fellow wolves, but someone at least. After he grew close to you, suddenly he was eating with others, suddenly he wasn't so alone anymore. And neither was she. She loves you for that, for giving her a pack to be with again, even if it was more spread out, and even if there were sometimes where they'd end up alone again, it was a little pack she found herself a part of all over again. Her pack. Her home.

And as you spent more and more time sleeping in their den, sharing Muriel's warmth, and cuddling up with her, she found her delight as a member of a pack of three. Muriel was happier with you to, so, so happy as his face grew soft, and his smiles grew wide, and when he did his chores, or wandered through the forest, you would sometimes jump up and delight her in a game, in a chance to chase, and jump and throw and catch, and sometimes, Muriel would join in too, and like a pair of wolves chasing after an agile deer, she would hunt you alongside Muriel peppering your face with kisses instead of bites when they inevitably found and caught you.

It was fun. It was happy. Small as you may be the three of you were a pack, which was why she had to fix this.

She knows why it happened, why you left so suddenly, and she's ashamed to know she had a paw in your sorrow large and clumsy as she was, she had knocked over your inkwell onto your book. You had been working on that so intently, staying up so late... too late in her and Muriel's opinion. It was the source of so many of your disagreements, and when you found it soaked in ink, all you did was cry.

She didn't mean to. She really didn't mean to. Her tail hit the bottle when she saw you finally taking a break and it just spilled all over the pages. And in that moment, you didn't dare to even look at her.

"Don't follow me," you had told Muriel with a frightening look in your eyes. You didn't say the same to her, though Muriel tried to argue for her to follow regardless.

"They don't want to be bothered," he insisted. "I... I think they just need to take a breather."

She could tell, in the way that familiars could, that more than anything, he wanted to defy that request. Instead, with his dexterous hands, he tries to salvage your work, to clean up the mess that she made, that she's helpless to fix, that she would only ever worsen if she even dared lay a paw upon it.

Still, she had to do something.

Muriel doesn't call after her when she slips out the door. The sound of wood creaking open, the sound of it slamming shut after was unmistakable, but he says nothing, despite that deep connection that would have allowed her to hear him despite the distance. He's silent, and though her chest pangs at the thought of leaving him in that state, she knows finding you, and fixing her mistake would surely bring you back, would surely fix his mood. So she tracks you down, the agile deer she's caught many times before, following your familiar scent, the familiar prints you leave in the forest around you, and finds you far far far away, crying, and gasping, panicking in that way she's seen Muriel do so many times before.

And in that way she's done to Muriel so many times before, she curls around you, lets you rest your head against her pelt, and quietly speaks, though she knows you can't hear.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. "I didn't mean to."

You lean into her touch, sob into her fur, and don't accept her apology, unable to understand a word she speaks. Her distress, is visible, is audible and you try to sniffle and pat her but you're too caught up in your own distress to try and console her. He licks at your tears, wiping them away like she's seen Muriel do with his hands, and you giggle at the feeling. She doesn't intend to make you giggle, but she keeps licking over and over again, if only to hear you laugh instead of cry.

"Inanna!" You bat her away, as gently as you can manage, and it pains her to be unable to tell you the same things Muriel does. You sound so sweet when you laugh, so why must you cry? Why cling to the sorrow she's given you when all she wants is to make you smile?

She wishes you could understand when she says how sorry she is.

Still, she curls around you, tucks her head atop your lap, and tries to keep you warm, to keep you company as you struggle to terms with the mistake she's made in you. At the very least, you sweep the tears from her eyes, and you fix her with a sad and tired look, like a puppy denied her mother. A pup denied her home.

Inanna knows she is giving you the same stare.

"I'm sorry Nana," you mumble perhaps in reply to her own sorrow, and she presses her face further against you, agonized at the idea that she has made you sorry. That you feel the need to apologize at all. Was it not her mistake that made you cry? Was it not her mistake that sent you running?

You lean in, and bask in the feel of her fluffy pelt, rubbing your hands against her fur, in that soothing manner that all you humans so loved to do. She basks in the feeling, the soft and tender feeling, and presses herself further into you, as if it would grant her more. It's greedy perhaps, but it seems to soothe you as much as it does her, as tears slowly dribble, then drip to a halt.

And you look to the forest your soul somewhere far away. And you look the spitting image of Muriel before you came into his life.

And she wonders what happened to you, when you made their life better...had... had they been making your life worse?

She nudges her face into your stomach, hoping and praying that you would get the message. She is curious, she wants to hear your thoughts. She does not want you to be alone in whatever suffering she and Muriel had left you to endure alone.

You look down at her, and as if by some miracle you smile and hear her silent plea.

"Do you ever feel like you're not what you're supposed to be?"

And Inanna curses the fates, the heavens and the moon who guides her. Curses that she was given such a wonderful pack to be a part of an eclectic mix of creatures big and small who all share that connection of affection with each other, who, though not often can sit at the same table and eat their shared catch together, and share whatever meal they've caught in their hunts. She curses that she's been given such a tiny intimate loving pack amidst the larger one, and that she is powerless to protect either when she cannot bear her teeth at the problem.

She wishes, again, begs and pleas to the very moon she just cursed that you could understand her once more.

"I do not understand," she would whisper in sad sorry sound "I am what I am and you are what you are, what is incorrect of our existence?"

And you look down at her, and twist that smile into a pitying thing. With a hand on her jaw you rub at your cheek and chuckle as she allows you this minor cruelty, forcing one eye shut, as she stares with the other.

"You're so tame Inanna, so kind. People say wolves should be fiercer, scarier than this. You seem almost more like a dog sometimes."

It's another cruelty that she must allow. If you could hear her, she would bear her teeth, scold you for thinking such cruel terms, as if others' thoughts could make her any less the wolf she is. But you would not hear her words, and you would not know her anger was not at you. Her jaws remain shut, though she could open them to remind you of her nature. And she leans further into your touch, to inform you of the rest of her.

She can be scarier, she can be fiercer, to her prey and any threat, but only a foolish wolf would bear her fangs at a pack-member in need.

"Inanna, did you know me when I was alive?"

She stares once more, eyes turning up to observe you from where she rests in your lap. She knows you now, and you are alive now. Is that not enough?

Again that sorrow pools in your eyes, sags over your shoulders and brings pains to your fingertips as you clutch at her fur. She wants to whimper to whine in pain but her silence is her gift to you, and an urge to listen to more.

She is here to fix, perhaps this is more than her mistake, but she has caused you pain and she wishes to know how to fix it—if she could fix it. The job seems grander and grander with every word that falls from your lips, every twist of your expression in pain and sorrow, and she is left helpless at her inability to talk to you as she so wishes.

"I knew more magic then, right?"

She tries to nod. It's true, before your death you knew far more than you knew now, but then you had seemed so unhappy as well. Wouldn't you be pleased to let go of such sorrows?

"I wish I still knew all that magic."

It clicks then, and she wants to speak. She begs for the ability to speak.

"Asra mentions it sometimes, how I used to be smarter, stronger, more capable."

"I wish I knew more magic too," she wants to say. "I wish I knew how to tell you that you're enough."

"Does Muriel ever mention it? How it would be nice if he didn't have to cover for my clumsiness all the time?"

"I wish I could tell you how much we love you."

Inanna does what she can. She shakes her head furiously, as she's seen you and Muriel do many times before, and she bears the brunt of dizziness that the movement brings. She wants to tell you that you're wrong, she wants to tell you that you are loved, she wants to tell you that to her, newborn as you are, you are just as powerful as the you of that past, that you had magic that your old self never could have reached. You had the ability to bring people together, to make a pack from a crowd of such different animals.

You had the magic to give her a pack again.

A pack of her, you, and—

"Are you okay?"

Muriel! Inanna leaps up, and she wonders at how she hadn't thought of it before. In a manner reminiscent of the day she first truly got to know you, she rushes behind Muriel, forgoing telling him what he needs to do in favour of telling him all that you were suffering alone. Muriel, she knew was clever. He'd know what to tell you, and he could speak for her too.

And yet when they turn to look at you, when she drags Muriel by his clothes yanked from between her teeth, she catches sight of your eyes growing wide, of your brows drawing down and your own body retreating from the both of them.

"Ah, sorry," Muriel tries to say. "I know you said not to follow you, but Inanna sounded distressed and—"

And you looked at her as if she had betrayed you. Hot tears building up on your face as you look away and try to hide, to hide from the both of them, of course, but to hide from yourself, she thinks as well.

"I'm fine. We're—Inanna and I were fine," you speak, around a mouthful of your own flesh and clothes. She can hear the shudder of your throat the warble in your tone, and she knows it is not merely from her keen ears that the sound carries through.

Muriel fixes her with a look, concern worry and curiosity, but when he whispers to her, in a voice only the two of them can hear, he asks her not to tell him. Not right away at least. She knows. She accepts, she never would have even if he didn't ask.

"Nana... Inanna wasn't fine."

You go still for a moment, back straightening, as if you're about to turn, before you burry your face deeper into your lap an attempt to hide more shame. Still the source of your sorrow, Inanna curls up beside Muriel, intent on doing the same.

"I'm sorry," and you sound so, so small.

Was this what he meant? When Muriel once fussed over his towering size. You sound so small, smaller than a bunny, smaller than a squirrel, you sound as if you could be held between her jaws and locked behind her teeth, and if she held you like she held a pup, she would have to take extra care not to bring you any harm.

It sounded like even before starting, she had already failed.

"It's not you," Muriel clarifies, shuffling close to lean against you. He starts with a hand on your shoulder, gives you ample time to shrug it off before he comes in with the rest of himself, pulling you into his embrace, into his affection and care.

And Inanna watches as you relax, suddenly wishing she was more like you.

She is a member of an eclectic pack of many different animals, but one mostly made of humans. Maybe she could take better care of you all if she traded her fangs for a form like yours. If she traded her fur for your skin.

She curls up beside you, trying to amend her inadequacy, and your hand finds her fur, stroking once more, calming even more.

If she can soothe you like this, then perhaps it isn't so bad.

"Inanna wanted to talk to you, but you can't understand what she says."

You say nothing, but you look away from the both of them, and Inanna understands. You still long for that magic so far out of your reach, you still long for the spells that you once had before your demise. She's sorry that she had stood between you and your goal, sorry that she had ruined your hard work to achieving it.

"She says she's sorry," Muriel says, and you sigh, shoulders sagging, as your hand returns to her fur.

"Its okay Nana, it was an accident I know."

"no, no, not only for that," she whispers.

"Not only for that," Muriel says.

"I'm sorry you think that you are lesser now than you were before"

"She says she's sorry that you think you're lesser now than you were before."

"I'm sorry that you think you are inadequate"

"She's sorry that you think you're inadequate."

"I'm sorry that you think we don't love you so much as you are now."

"She's sorry—" and Muriel falters, words dying on his tongue. "Do... do you not think we love you as you are now? Do you think we'd love the you from before... more?"

"It's not.... I know you didn't even really know me then" you try to argue back, but your voice warbles and cracks and though you try to deny it, it's clear the feeling was there. "But I... I was such a skilled magician before. Asra tries not to mention it but.... but I hear it sometimes. In the way that they speak.... they look so sad, so disappointed, as if they're upset that I'm not like that anymore—and I know that they're probably more upset that I've forgotten them," you're hiccuping now, gasping for air, that your lungs deprive yourself of a self harm that mirrors your words, cruel bitter things, where you pretend as if it's foolish for you not to be so hurt. "It's just that... I... I ... It'd be nicer wouldn't it? If I wasn't so clumsy, and if I knew all those spells. I'm sure I knew a spell to understand familiars once, I could've talked to her—I could have talked to you Inanna. And I just... I thought that maybe if I studied a little more I could do it again. That you know, maybe I could do other things too, and you wouldn't need to help me so often.

"I just feel like there's just so many things I can't do anymore. So many things I don't remember how to do, that would be so, so helpful."

And Muriel speaks exactly what Inanna thinks, without a word of encouragement from her side. "Do you think you aren't really helpful right now? Even if you aren't helpful, it doesn't make you any less...wonderful."

With his dexterous hands, Muriel slips your cheek into his palm, cradling your face, as he shuffles around you to make it easier for you to turn to him, to make it easier for him to wipe away your tears, to make it easier for him to tug you into his chest, let you sob into his shirt as he holds you tight. Inanna nuzzles up beside you, rubs her cheek against your shuddering ribs, and though it's hardly the same as the affection Muriel gives you, she hopes you can feel it too.

"You've done so much for me. For Inanna too. You remember how you told me that my past doesn't define me? The same applies to you, you know. You're amazing now, what does it matter how skilled you were before?"

"I don't know," you sob. "But... gods, it still makes me feel like I've somehow failed. Like I've grown worse over time instead of getting better. I should be getting better, shouldn't I?"

Muriel opens his mouth to say something, but grimaces at the thought. Inanna knows. Inanna knows full well what he's thinking, and she speaks for him, before he chooses silence.

"I... um... oh... Inanna says that.... no pup learns how to walk without stumbling, and.... and that no hunt future hunt will be better if the current one is successful. And.... and she says that even if she fails to catch her food, she is no less a wolf. And... and that applies to the both of us."

Muriel's face turns a little pink at the mention, and you turn to look up at him, your own hand coming up to mirror his own, cradled on his cheek. As you ask with your heart of concern, "You think you're not good enough?"

His brows dip though that pink colour doesn't go away. "I should be saying that to you, you know. You already know so much magic..."

"And you know so much about the forest, about life."

Muriel scoffs, eyes growing dark. "I know a lot about ending it."

"And a lot about healing it. Even without magic, you know how to mend wounds so well."

"And even without as much knowledge as before, you know how to do so much." You scoff at his retort, and Inanna buts her head against you, something Muriel is eager to translate. "Inanna agrees."

You roll your eyes, at their shared agreement, and smile. Muriel smiles in turn seemingly satisfied with this outcome, but Inanna is not convinced.

She speaks through Muriel, wagging her tail as she squirms into the space between the both of you, hoping to curl up around both of you and emphasize her points.

"Nanna!" you yelp

"Pfft." Muriel swats at her tail, likely stuck in his face. She doesn't regret a thing, only that it makes him slower to speak. "Inanna, oof, Nanna says that she loves you by the way."

"Both of you. I love both of you."

Muriel stubbornly refuses to voice the latter part. She swats her tail against his face again. "Hey! Okay, okay, both of us she says."

"You are my pack."

"She says we're her pack," and Muriel further translates. "She says we're her family."

"Inanna..." You open your arms, and let her into her lap, showering her with affection and cuddles, hands scratching and petting and fluffing and rubbing. "I love you too Nanna!"

From the side Muriel watches with a small smile on his lips as Inanna peppers you with slobbery kisses, and before he dares lapse into any feelings of isolation, Inanna twists, intent on pulling him into this pile of affection and play, as for the first time in a long time, she shows her love for her family the way a wolf does best.

So perhaps she cannot fix her pack's problems by bearing her teeth. She can fix them with play and affection with kisses, and with help. She's not alone anymore. And neither are either of you.

#familiars screwed up #but she also fixed it in the end lmao #x reader #reader insert #Muriel x reader #Muriel the arcana #Muriel #the arcana muriel #the arcana muriel x reader #the arcana #Muriel the mountain man #Muriel the hermit #muriel of the kokkhuri #muriel arcana #muriel the hermit #Inanna #Inanna the arcana #the arcana Inanna #Inanna the wolf

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