#my heart is here fr

[bintturaab]

The last time I came for Umrah was 11 years ago, and being back in Makkah and Madinah is so emotional on so many levels.

Back in 2012, I remember ardently praying to Allah to let my parents accept my change as a Muslim, to let me wear the niqab, among many other things. Returning here for the 2nd Umrah of my life as a niqabi now, chokes my heart with so much emotion subhanAllah. Sometimes when I look at myself in the mirror, I can't believe that I actually get to go out like this, because of the years and years of fighting and struggling I've had to do for it. But alhamdulillah the end result always feels so sweet ♡

The last time when I was here, I made so much dua for my people, for my beloved companions, none of whom are with me anymore. None of them. The ones who still are here, the way they've become, it doesn't really count. Now I'm making dua for a whole different set of people, whose existence I didn't even know about the last time around. I love them all, but thinking back to the ones I started my journey with, it makes me feel some type of way that I cannot name. Somehow I'm back to square one, but having lived a few lifetimes in between.

I remember how 11 years ago, being able to visit the House of Allah and beseeching Him there with a heart full of conviction, literally changed my life when I returned, for the better. All the hardships, which were honestly so much worse than anything I have now, all went away alhamdulillah. It was nothing short of miraculous.

When I return this time, I hope my life transforms for the better once more, bi idhnillah. Somewhere between these years, I've lost all hope in this dunya. My heart is a different type of broken than it was before. But there's no way we could ever lose hope in Allah, when He is the source of all hope, عز وجل

{وَلَوْلَا فَضْلُ اللَّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَتُهُ وَأَنَّ اللَّه رَوُوفٌ رَحِيمٌ} ♡

#last day in Makkah I'm gonna cryyyyy pls no 😭 #already left Madinah and I'm never gonna be home anywhere else again #my heart is here fr #spilled thoughts #matters of the heart

[ruporas]

captain's warm hugs! (id in alt)

#opfanart #one piece #monkey d luffy #roronoa zoro #nami #usopp #sanji #my first nongun art in 8 kabillion years. i watched opla recently and it resurged smth deep within me... #idk who of my first followers are still here but one piece has been like T_T urgh. my beginnings... i love this series so much #LUFFY especially - zoro is my favorite but luffy is the heart of the show!!! inaki's performance was really fun and carried that same #vibrancy - it made me sooo happy to see... and in general the romance dawn crew has always been dear to my heart uuu... the la gave a lot o #good bits between the og trio but i def wish we couldv seen more with usopp & sanji too. but maybe.. if we ever get a season 2 :'D #anyway i love the straw hats steadily getting used to luffy's shenanigans and even liking it at some point. the warming up part of all thei #friendships is so dear to me and its just a natural blossom of comfort and trust. and some of these mfs are Touch starved fr.... #ruporas art

[hella1975]

noah kahan really said growing up in a small, bitter hometown is about the rage and the hatred that's been sung about many times before but it's also about love and devotion and the 'all three of us were drowning and we didn't know how to save each other but there was an understanding that we were all drowning together' of it all and knowing people so intimately yet not being able to help anyone and he's morally grey at best in a lot of his songs and objectively the bad guy in others and that's just how it is and it's about substance abuse and normalised crime and teen suicide and country roads and failed exams and leaving and being left and love and hate and love and hate and love and

#anyway. listening to orange juice again. like it's my fault #girls when growing sideways and view between villages and northern attitude and homesick and stick season come on #like new england must actually be called that for a reason bc you cant convince me this guy isnt actually secretly singing about england #like even when he sings about the WEATHER im like !!! this guy gets it fr!!! #IM TIRED OF DIRT ROADS NAMED AFTER HIGH SCHOOL FRIEND'S GRANDFATHERS AND MOTHERFUCKERS HERE DONT KNOW #THEY CAUGHT THE BOSTON BOMBERS TIME MOVES SO DAMN SLOW I SWEAR I FEEL MY ORGANS FAILING I STOPPED CARING ABOUT A MONTH AGO #SINCE IT'S BEEN SMOOTH SAILING I WOULD LEAVE IF ONLY I COULD FIND A REASON IM MEAN BECAUSE I GREW UP IN NEW ENGLAND!!! #or the entirety of growing sideways. divvied up my anger into 30 seperate parts keep the bad shit in my liver and the rest around my heart #r u even listening. what the hell #HONEY COME OVEERRRRRR THE PARTY'S GONE SLOWERRR AND NO ONE WILL TEMPT YOU WE KNOW YOUVE GONE SOBER <- sobbing #noah kahan #stick season

[2aceofspades]

can I just say how much I love these drawings, the leosagi brings me like 😭

Awwwee thank you so much!! 🤗✨ I didn't expect the leosagi ship to hit me so hard but gah-

It did. Welp heh 😅

Anywhizzle! Here's some more leosagi for y'all~

(:

#ace answers #acey doodles #the height difference is making my heart ache in the best way fr #i never thought i'd be drawing the bunny boy but here we are i guess hehe.. #they're dumb and i love that #:)

[reilliane]

I honestly wasn't expecting the Kazuha to rejoin my world even after being added in the friend list, 'cause you know, sometimes they're just there- in the list.

But boy am I surprised- in a good way! 'Cause omg I genuinely feel giddy PAHAHHADHSAJDH

The Kazuha wanted fungal spores this time :'))

Also yes, there's "TBC" because I did not include all of the shenanigans here, so there's going to be one more part!

(a very cute close-up of two adventuring anemo men utc)

#moonlitartem #genshin comic #kazuha #xiao #genshin fanart #seriously i cant help but love our interaction #heres to hoping they arent annoyed by my over use of capslock lmao i cant help it 😭 #also this 2p is very kazuha... i swear its uncanny #bcs 2p has a tendency to just vanish in thin air and i cant find them at ALL like seriously- #re-enacting his fugitive arc?? /LH #the next part is even funnier 😭 #im so flattered they rejoined my world tho lIKE FR MY HEART! ITS SOFT.

[noxious-fennec]

A redraw of an old thing because exam season is the only time i get creative energy ig

#but no fr i just came home from 2 consecutive exams. like consecutive as in one after the other in 2 hours #next week is all finals and theyre all like 2 hours 1 in the morning and 1 in the afternoon like bro #whatevs tho medical update THE MEDS ARE WORKING alhamdulilallah i feel im getting way more energy :) #2 years on immunosuppressants and at least 3 months of corticosteroids which means no salt :( BUT we are getting thru it #im cooking again :') #ok enough my life is not what you're here for. idk if cbeeduo at the end of 2023 *is* but idc #i just rly missed them yk and the vibes and the place i was in plus i have fun drawing them so suck it #i hope my good cbee mutuals enjoy this love yall #my art #dsmp fanart #cranboo #ctubbo #cbeeduo #fashion notes for the cool peeps still reading is i am dying on the hill that cranboo was decked in a 70s aunt wardrobe argue with the wall #also tubbo cowboy cus. like. look at him. #will probably draw tommy next i rly miss him. nothing big as always im a doodle kinda guy at heart #anyway xoxo love yall still here <33 #fennec.art

[tawaifeddiediaz]

something about the diaz home as a symbol of everything sacred to eddie.

something about the diaz home representing eddie's privacy and his life and by extension, christopher's, and that it's a constant, recurring motif of a life that he's built with his son. and it's always interesting to see that his home is always warm (in terms of lighting, color combos, etc etc) and welcoming, which feels so vastly different to the other two homes we've seen for him in eddie begins

something about the way he has to physically open the door to let people in to his life, and how many shots of that we've had of just him opening the damned door since. something about the way he physically lets shannon in in 2x07, or the way he braces himself with chris' encouragement before opening the door to ana in 4x08, or the way he happily lets carla in in 4x13 or the way he softens and smiles when he opens the door to buck in 6x12. it's in the way the only people we've really seen in eddie's home as "not guests" are the ones that he chooses to let in.

in that same vein, we can always tell when there's someone in there that doesn't quite belong. 5x11 is a prime example of this, and not just because of the episode title, "outside looking in." it's evidently obvious that the only reason taylor's in his house is for buck's sake, and maybe that's why we never see eddie actually letting them in. 5x03 is similar to that, in the sense that ana stays for three days with chris at the diaz home, but when eddie comes back, it's a metaphorical and physical mess that he's left standing in the middle of, alone.

and it's very, very interesting that we've never seen his parents in his house. ever. and yes, it could just be the fact that they rarely come to los angeles period, but i just think it's interesting in terms of eddie's journey with them, that the closest we've gotten to them physically being there is that facetime call with his dad, and that phone call with his mom - both of which happen after he goes back to texas in 5x17 where he point-blank tells his dad he's trying to be better for himself, and his dad meets him halfway. it only happens after his relationship with his dad starts improving.

i just constantly think of the diaz home front door, and now that i've thought of it, there's so many other moments that scream at me:

buck unlocking eddie's door in 4x14 and swinging it open to the party, and then later standing in the open doorway almost like he's protecting eddie and the life he's built in this one way because he couldn't protect him in the other way

buck unlocking eddie's door with his own key in 5x13, then bursting through yet another door to get to eddie, just to step in and sit with him in his grief - and how much that scene symbolizes that eddie may have built this life but it was after burying demons that later just crawled up through the cracks of his new home.

buck standing inside the diaz home after eddie gets home from therapy in 5x14 like this is a regular occurrence.

the way eddie's discomfort is visible in that split second scene we get of the police officers storming his home in 2x15

eddie asking shannon to leave through the back door because he may have let her into his life but he's not ready to let her into chris' and thus, he doesn't truly let her into his life - and actually, even the shot of eddie, chris and shannon at the end of that episode takes place outside the diaz home. which is...telling methinks.

eddie opening his door post-date in 4x07 to buck meeting him at it (always meeting him halfway), and just. the domesticity of it, set off by the warm lights, the discussion they have, and the looks on their faces the whole like

eddie opening his door to buck in 6x12, looking apprehensive for a second before he realizes who it is and his smile grows and eyes turn into heart-eyes and buck just pushes past him without waiting for eddie to step aside, only to go and swing his feet up on the coffee table like the diaz home is his, too.

there's so many examples but @sevensoulmates and i put this whole meta together because the symbolism in this tv show is off the charts

#zee rambles #meta #911 abc #911 on abc #eddie diaz #is some of this a reach? probably #do i care? no #because fr it's so bold of a motif to use the diaz home as a symbol for eddie and it's not just house is a home #it's also my home is my heart and you are my home and here's my heart #idk #it's a lot of things at once #there's a complete separate meta about the buddie implications of this all #and from a visual standpoint there's something about the fact that eddie clearly prefers lamp and warm lighting (as he should) #we rarely see overhead lighting used and that's just...that #long post #i should be writing my midterm rn but alas

[beanghostprincess]

Not to project or anything, but I think Nami would have a hard time actually realizing she's a lesbian because she actually has never trusted anybody enough to fall for them, and she uses flirting techniques to steal and get what she wants but she doesn't actually feel anything for these people. And she can admit that flirting with girls feels better and it doesn't make her want to puke, but perhaps it's just the fact that men fucking suck. It's not like she is going to ever fall in love, so it doesn't matter. Little flirting here and there to get the money she needs and all. But then Luffy happens. Arlong Park happens. And she's free and she has time to think about herself. She still flirts with men to get what she wants, but Sanji is more like a Golder Retriever and one of her best friends, so it doesn't even count. And then she meets Vivi.

And Vivi is a whole other world. She's a princess. She's mature. She has so much responsibility that it could crush Nami if that weight were to be put on her shoulders, so she considers Vivi to be the strongest girl she has ever met. She's also fun to be around. Extremely sweet and empathetic and it's one of the first times somebody shows so much empathy and compassion for her, sacrificing her goal to save Nami's life because she's sick. Falling for Vivi is extremely easy, but she's scared to do so because she has never actually trusted someone this much before and she has never opened up to a girl enough for her to be able to break her heart. But she knows she likes Vivi. More than she has liked other girls, yes, but they all made her feel this way. Vivi is just the one in between all of them. And it's not like flirting with men at all. Men are a tool she can use. Vivi is her whole dream.

Vivi breaks her heart by staying in Arabasta, but it's not her fault she has bigger things to take care of than them. They'll see each other again someday. And Nami now has the realization about liking girls but loving Vivi. And I think that's something beautiful to think about.

#she's just like me fr yadda yadda yes i am projecting my lesbian heart here #i mean i realized i was a lesbian in a way more fucked up way and it's a long story but yeah kind of like this #one piece #nami #cat burglar nami #lesbian nami #nefertari vivi #namivivi

[genericpuff]

me in the last couple days leading up to new rekindled updates:

me after rekindled updates and i see everyone's reactions and tags and theories which makes it all worth doing it over again:

#here we go to episode 46 #episode 45 was such a ride for me to write and draw fr #i'm so glad y'all liked it #i'm seeing more speculation than ever about persephone's character arc and it's filling my heart with so much joy #because y'all are already piecing shit together #you're just missing the last piece #idk what's gonna happen once it's found #but i know for sure the journey getting there is gonna be worth it #lore rekindled #lore rekindled comic

[personishfive]

in which goro is recruited

#my art #persona 5 #p5 spoilers #goro akechi #akira kurusu #joker p5 #a smaller gomic (goro comic). an appetizer. #like most of my comics there is no reasonable explanation that would lead to this taking place but its funny so i drew it. its the vision #also.2/3 of the comics ive posted here have ryuji in it which is weird bc i dont actually draw him that much at all. (im not very good atit #also ive noticed lots of artists that i genuinely really respect liking these.guys thank you so much i PROMISE i usually draw better than #this i just never post it. heart emoji #but fr thanks for all the support on the gomics. have you guys seen my animatic *gets killed by beam attack* #comics

[general-cyno]

More empty words. I swear to you the day will come when you have to pick between them.

#trigunedit #tristampedit #trigun stampede #trigun #vash the stampede #vash #millions knives #nai #myedit #mygifs #got out of postgrad class like. hey i should do smth foul so here we are #before someone comes for my ass i know exactly how much nai himself is to blame here #this parallel just breaks my liddol heart in millions (hah) of pieces #the consequences of the two most traumatized deranged dudes in nml's thinking they can fix each other fr #kept listening to sunlight or demise by unl1ke pluto while giffing and boy did it set the mood for this set #it's good btw i recommend it

[abrahamvanhelsings]

the hitch in van helsing's words when he says "i beseech you" im going to cry for real this time. it's not even simply that he knows how important it is that he gets arthur to trust him, that he's conscious of their duty to all living souls and lucy herself to do this to her and how difficult this will be physically and emotionally. it's that arthur now distrusts him, cries at him in anger - arthur, the man who looks like his lost son and whom he loves because of it. the man whose love and respect he may now never get back after suggesting mutilating lucy's corpse. he isn't just desperate for all the men in that room to trust him so they can give lucy peace and keep the living safe. that's the sacrifice of his father's heart splitting in two right there. wtf alan burgon.

#alan burgon owns my fucking life fr every time i think it can't get better and then he's on the next ep and it's like #*holding my heart in his hand* if i squeeze like this i can wring every single emotion you've ever experienced out of you all at once #i had to pause then relisten then pause again b4 continuing #of course arthur forgives him in the end! but vh doesn't know that while he's suggesting this! #he goes up to arthur and suggests cutting off the head of his fiancée and he has to completely depend on his powers of persuasion #(which are off the charts but that's neither here nor there) #what if arthur didn't want to come. he'd only be able to do to lucy what has to be done by dishonouring whatever trust arthur has left #and in any case arthur would always think him mad and awful and never forgive him for anything #i am back on my vh bullshit (i was never off it) yes im being overly dramatic abt it. don't care. #dracula #dracula daily #re: dracula

[breadhalfburnt]

for eel

#talking to the stars #my art #cj heart #chonny jash #<- jash tag for funsieeesss #but yeah…… gues who’s arting……. good afternight everone #but i’m just throwing this out here because idk if it’ll work with what i’m doing and i am far too attached to this now #late night feels fr

[luuxxart]

How had ryukitann got together? 🤔

sorry this is a little rushed, but in general i think this is the gist of how they’d get together

#persona 5 #ryuji sakamoto #yusuke kitagawa #ann takamaki #ryuann #ryukita #annkita #ryuannkita #PS SORRY IF IT SEEMS LIKE I POSTED TWICE. TUMBLR REALLY WOULD NOT LET ME INTO MY QUEUE I PROMISE #I remember trying to write fic for them and gave up #there are no non-E rated fics for these guys and that is so depressing man #I hold this ship so very close to my heart fr #it’s the only one that’s really survived from my first playthrough of p5 #bc before I was into Shu///ake I was huge on Shu///yuu and polythieves in general #then I kinda settled into what I like now as I got more into the fandom #aNYWAY THO THANK U FOR THE ASK #my brainworms are progressing #I can see some people thinking ryuji is problematic here and. yes<3 #I didnt have time or space really to like. make a bigger fallout before everything is resolved #so obviously intruding upon dates is not healthy but let’s just ignore that for my boi ryuji #long post #ask

[celticbotanart]

Been thinking about Bandori again lately, so I dug up some sketches I've done months ago; mostly because I didn't want to draw anything from scratch, but the sketches were good enough and I really liked them a lot already. The only one I drew from scratch is the one on the bottom right corner, to fill up that empty space and make the panel full~

I've noticed I really like to draw these two idiots interacting, which is kinda rare, lol. Interactions are hard for me to draw and I admit I kinda avoid it a lot. They're comfortable and fun for me to draw, especially in random wholesome shenanigans! I guess it's the platonic aspect, I'm not super fan of drawing/writing romantic stuff; I tend to enhance the sisterly relationship the characters already have canonically.

The main drawing here was inspired by an actual picture of Raychell and Risa (their VAs, to those unfamiliar) <3

Another thing I do is making Rei wear shirts of real bands, bands that I like. It's usually Within Temptation, because they are totally a band that would exist in the Bandori-verse; this time though, I made Rei wear a Yuki Kajiura / FictionJunction shirt, I LOVE that cover art so much!! It's another band/project I see existing in that universe!

commission info | patreon | kofi | twitter | bluesky

#Bandori #raise a suilen #wakana rei #chu2 #brazilian artists #my art #publicly posting ONE (01) fanart as a freebie treat #I'm not too keen on posting fanart publicly anymore as some of you might know but I sometimes open an exception for Bandori stuff #cause people are always so cute and excited in the tags when I post them!! It warms my heart fr thank you guys! <3 #also the post is a little on the longer side here cause I also miss talking about the pieces and the blorbos in the art description #the golden era of long ass descriptions on Deviantart circa 2009 #also Glaze is REALLY fucking up the drawings more than the usual sorry about the funky ass textures!

[variksel]

i know i talk a LOT about glenn and nick respectively and together on here but goddamnit i just relistened to the episode where they glenn meets nicholas after prison and i cant get how tragic it is out of my head. spending almost twenty years in prison to protect your son from harm, from having to most likely face being orphaned. spending all that time trying to escape with only him in your mind because he is all you have left after your wife died years ago and when you finally meet him again he looks at you with disgust and the son you once loved so much is effectively dead and buried. hes got a new dad who you KNOW, factually and objectively because it was ordered by a court, did a better job raising him than you did with your son. you did try but eventually you ended up repeating the patterns your own parents left in your life and thats not good enough. your son ends up in an objectively better position without you, without needing you anymore despite everything you did for him, and you can do nothing but accept all of that

"glenns not stupid, he knows morgans death affected nick. he doesnt want him to have to go through it again" and (ron): "your son.. sucks now" (glenn, grabbing him from the collar): "you say that shit to me one more time." and "this is the first time ive seen- [the sunlight]"

#can you tell who my favourite dad is. can you #UGH ITS JUST LIKE. ITS SO FICKIGN GOOD #it makes me scream genuinely im so giddy about it in aGSHVSHEBSKFKDJDK #wont tolerate no glenn hatred here btw genuinely i love that man with my entire heart! #he was the worst dad but like LMAODJSKD #no but fr #IMAGINE. losing your wife in a car crash #and struggling to raise your son alone now #for years #thinking (hoping) that youre doing a good job #only to find out you were not only a bad parent and someone else ended up raising your boy better #AND for that guy to also not have lost his (your?) wife #youd be thinking what did you do so wrong #youd be thinking maybe her death too wouldve been avoidable #and then you just have to. live with that. #MAN #dndads #dungeons and daddies #glenn close #nick close #nicky freeman #nick foster #jodie foster #henry oak #darryl wilson #ron stampler #dungeons and daddies spoilers #dndads odyssey