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quidfree · 3 years

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can you Please write the scene with bakugou's piercing SGDHEFEH the concept is too funny to me !!!

anon you’re lucky 報復性熬夜 is a concept i am firmly attached to so here i am at 1 am rattling this off instead of getting my beauty sleep. please excuse the standard of writing as a result

by the second day, katsuki is seriously considering agreeing to todoroki’s earlier and ambiguously sincere proposal that they play i spy.

he doesn’t know what it is about this particular job that’s so unbearable. no, scratch that- of course he knows what’s unbearable; it’s sat right next to him on a too-small chair in their too-small room staring impassively out of a too-small window. but he’s been thrown into so much shit with icyhot you’d think he’d developed some kind of immunity by now, the way vaccines microdose you on viruses so you can resist the real thing. call katsuki an antivaxxer, he guesses, because he has overdosed on todoroki ever since he met the asshole and he’s still not ready for how far up the wall he’s driving him when they’re stuck together for two straight days without a breather or any contact with the outside world.

cards on the table: stake-outs aren’t his thing. he does them just fine, fuck you very much, but he doesn’t like ‘em. why would he? they’re some ungodly blend of extremely boring and extremely tense, where nothing happens right up until way too long into it and then everything goes to shit unprompted. it’s rare he ever gets called in on jobs like this- people tend to assume he lacks the temperament for it, for one, and for another he’s too useful to lock away for days on end. it’s only because their suspected target is so insanely volatile and dangerous that it’s the two of them waiting for her to show her ugly face- no one else is even allowed in the perimeter. which is fucking fine, but he just wishes the cops would get their shit together for once and actually have the proof ready by the time they call the pros in so he doesn’t have to wait before he goes in guns blazing. instead they talked some bullshit about how critical of a stage this was and blah blah fifteen years of (obviously mediocre) work had gone into setting this trap, etc etc. the point is that it’s led to katsuki stuck in the world’s most disgusting little apartment, staring out of a splintered window for two-going-on-three days with no one but the world’s most annoying prodigy to keep him company. the place is such a dump they’re sleeping on mats in sleeping bags. it’s like fucking UA summer camp, and at this point he’d take the kidnapping over the waiting.

day one wasn’t so bad, right up until he realized there would be a day two. day two is bad from start to finish. they’re supposed to take turns on watch but there’s fuck all else to do except sit on their phones, and katsuki can only quote tweet so much dumb shit before he gets bored. he can’t talk to anyone outside because of confidentiality bullshit, and there’s no point checking work shit when he can’t do anything from where they are. so it’s either silently watching the warehouse or talking to todoroki, and todoroki is a fucking terrible conversationalist.

the thing with icyhot is this: katsuki doesn’t hate him, okay. like, he hates him, but also not really. they’re, at a push, maybe, sort of, friends. verging on close ones. not that he’d say so, but after the amount of dramatic self-sacrifices and final stands against a joint enemy they’ve endured he can’t really muster the energy to argue otherwise. todoroki’s tolerable, sort of maybe. usually katsuki borderline likes working with him, because if nothing else he’s good at what he does, and they know each other too well to be anything but in sync in the field. if they were doing almost anything else he’d be relieved at the choice of pairing.

they are not, however, doing anything else, and todoroki still fucking sucks at talking like a normal person. when he’d woken katsuki up for his shift of night-watch he’d loomed over him ominously like a fucking ghoul and said, voice belying no humor: “do you think plants can feel pain?”

there’s fucking nothing to talk about. anything interesting is essentially vetoed because it’d inevitably distract them from the whole intent observation thing, and katsuki hates small talk on a normal day but especially when todoroki’s doing his ‘alien attempting earth dialect’ bit and asking him about weather or the tokyo transportation system or whatever. so they just sit in semi-silence and occasionally go on very stupid tangents katsuki is glad no one can witness and remain overall bored out of their fucking skulls.

by day three they’ve already exhausted i spy and also the alphabet game and hangman, and katsuki draws the line at tic-tac-toe. todoroki looks implacable as always but his eye has started twitching a little. katsuki tries to think of literally anything that could plausibly take up their time and not take their eyes off the window, comes up short. twister is not a good idea even ignoring their lack of a board. shop talk is so very tempting, but he’s not losing this villain and wasting two days’ suffering because they get carried away on some long-winded discussion, so that’s not an option either.

“how’s your ear?” todoroki says, and at first katsuki thinks he’s really fucking lost it if he’s started asking after the wellbeing of his individual body parts, but then he remembers the last time they saw each other katsuki was throwing himself into the path of some jackass with a trumpeting quirk who nearly blew out his eardrum, so he guesses half ‘n half’s not entirely insane yet. he shrugs, shifts in his chair.

“fine. couldn’t hear shit from it for like three straight days, though. and my balance was fucked.”

“it hasn’t scarred at all.”

“yeah. lame place for a scar,” katsuki says, flexing his fingers absently. they’re all of them more roughed up than they were at UA, but talent and good healers have kept him mostly intact, give or take a few big nasties like the time he got gutted in first year or his near loss of an eye around graduation. privately he suspects genetics have dealt him a good hand, what with his gene donor’s perfect skin, but then todoroki doesn’t have that excuse and he’s not scarred anywhere ugly except the obvious, though katsuki could point blind to most of the nasties he’s accumulated under his suit.

not that he thinks about what’s under todoroki’s suit. god, he needs to get out of here.

“i don’t know,” todoroki is saying now, thoughtful. “a lot of people have ear-scars, no? from piercings.”

“that’s different,” katsuki says, immediately contrarian, even as he thinks about it. by the warehouse a truck stalls, but then moves on, lessening his momentary excitement. “most people don’t let that shit heal. unless you’re a moron there’s no point getting a hole jabbed through your ear if you’re not sure you want it.”

“would you?” todoroki asks, mildly curious, and taps his ear where katsuki can see him in the window’s reflection. “get a piercing, i mean.”

“what’s it to you?”

todoroki rolls his eyes at him like he’s being pointlessly difficult, which he maybe is a little. “i don’t know. i think it would suit you.”

“yeah?” katsuki sniffs, mollified and trying not to show it. it’s always a mistake to let icyhot know when his obvious ploys are working. “been thinking about it?”

“i can hardly sleep at night for thinking about it,” todoroki deadpans, which makes katsuki scowl and stomp down on the extremely unwarranted flush crawling up his neck in response.

“fuck off. i guess i’d do like one or two.”

“really? you always say no to tattoos.”

“that’s different. i don’t trust some asshole to draw a fucking infinity sign on my knee or whatever. sticking a hole through an ear is hard to fuck up, and you barely register it after. if you get a shitty tattoo you have to think about it all the time.”

“if it’s easy then why don’t you have any?” todoroki asks, but he sounds genuinely curious more than like he’s trying to catch him out, so katsuki thinks about it honestly.

“don’t have the time. ‘s not like i can really afford to pencil in an afternoon to the nearest parlor or whatever just for that.”

“i read you can pierce your ears with a needle.”

“i guess i haven’t fucking thought about it that much, then,” katsuki grumbles, forever irked by todoroki’s smart mouth. problem solver his ass. the guy goes around making problems for everyone.

they sit in silence for a beat, watching the breeze rattle the wooden planks barricading a window opposite them, and then he thinks needle, and does some very quick mental arithmetics to reach the conclusion that todoroki is probably also landing on, judging by the way he blinks when katsuki briefly glances his way.

he thinks about the job, and how close he’d come to throttling todoroki during i spy, and the great dawning nothingness ahead of them for fuck knows how long still. at the very worst, they have to start moving with a needle in his ear.

“pass me your medikit.”

todoroki does, but when katsuki unzips the pack he shifts. “it’d be easier if i did it.”

“it’s not rocket science,” katsuki mutters, considering the needle critically before glancing back out of the window. “'s not like i give a shit about precise location.”

“i’m just saying i wouldn’t have to go in blind. and you can keep watch while i do it.”

“or you can keep watch while i do. same shit.”

todoroki only shakes his head, because unlike some people who shall not be named he is not so incredibly psychosexually attached to offering help where it isn’t wanted. “fine.”

katsuki eyes the window, squints at his ear. tissue’s the best bet- he thinks he could probably manage cartilage fine, but on the off chance they have to drop everything and run he doesn’t want to accidentally snap a bone and start the fight inconvenienced. lobe it is.

“wait,” todoroki says, just when he’s focused, and then reaches over without removing his gaze from the window to press two fingers to the needle, tip going blisteringly red-hot before he releases it. cauterised. their kit’s sterilised anyway, but katsuki grunts his begrudging thanks, repositions himself.

“wait,” todoroki says again, and this time katsuki can’t help but turn to glare at him where he’s still watchfully staring outside.

“fucking what, icyhot?”

“two seconds,” todoroki promises, gaze flickering his way for half a second with something like self-effacing amusement before he turns his eyes dutifully away and reaches his other arm around to pinch his ear, which flares cold so quickly katsuki hisses even as his cheeks heat. fucking weirdo.

“could’ve just said,” he mutters, ignoring his not at all jumpy pulse to refocus on the task at hand as todoroki does that obnoxious lip-twitch thing that means he’s smiling internally.

physics dictates that he keep his wrist at an angle if he wants the needle to come out right, so he does, braces and jabs. it goes so easy he almost doubts his own success, not even the slightest twinge of pain ensuing. he twists for good measure, removes the needle, watches tiny beads of blood emerge from the piercing.

well, that was anticlimactic, katsuki thinks, retrieving an anti-bacterial wipe for the needle, and then pauses, staring at the window.

“motherfucker.”

“what?”

“what the fuck am i supposed to put through this?”

todoroki’s mismatched eyes go gratifyingly wide in the window, and for one spectacularly braindead moment two of the world’s most outstanding pro-heroes stare at one another in a shitty broken window with equal amounts of retroactive dismay.

“um,” todoroki says, or as close to ‘um’ as todoroki will ever say. katsuki wishes dearly he was still of an age where he could throw him through a wall. then his eyes focus elsewhere, sharpening with what could pass as professional focus but is mostly naked relief. “um.”

um in-fucking-deed. by the warehouse, a door has just opened a sliver.

“you owe me a fucking earring,” katsuki declares, but so fast it lacks any aggression, already halfway out the window by the time he finishes speaking, atrophied limbs reviving with an ecstatic chemical burn as fresh air hits their faces.

god. if he ever gets stuck on stake-out duty again he’s sleeping by himself under a parked car or some shit.

they make disgustingly quick work of the fight, in the end, days of pent-up frustration and skull-numbing boredom leaving them so bursting with power that it’s almost embarrassing for the villain, but when the first kow-towing police officer reaches them full of praise and suggestion that they handle another job he has queued up they chorus a ‘no’ so violent the guy actually jumps.

todoroki’s not so bad, katsuki thinks fondly, watching his face slide into frigid blankness with absolutely no idea of how shitless he’s scaring the officers around them. it’s almost enough to make him forget to kick his ass for the enormously shitty banter he’d had to endure vis-a-vis his still-bleeding ear throughout the entire tragically short fight.

almost. not quite. who even knew there was a ‘gay ear’?

#qui parle #qui ecrit #anon #todobaku #bnha #tdbk

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justwriting34 · 5 years

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The Umbrella Academy. Netflix’s (new) hit show, or well I think it’s a hit, but I am not a great judge of shows. It’s my type of show. It’s crazy, without shoving your face in the crazy. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, while still having serious moments. It has a talking monkey, seriously, could you think of a better show? It has romance, just not enough that you feel like a kid after the perfect Halloween score. It has action, just not so much action you’re in a slaughter house, or a b rated action movie with ½ price Bruce Willis. It has time travel, that realizes that time travel doesn’t make sense. And damn it, it has the talking monkey.

How can anyone not love a show like that? I sure have to like it. The show didn’t give me much of a choice. And it isn’t like some shows that Stockholm Syndrome you into loving it. I loved it at first sight, because of the monkey. We get it, you must be thinking a lot about the monkey, you love the monkey, we get that. First off, it’s a monkey butler, that’s a very different thing. And don’t go quoting me saying that I was only referring to him as the monkey or the talking monkey or even a talking monkey. It won’t work. I won’t listen even if you are right. Which you might be. And honestly, I don’t really like the monkey, well no more than any one likes a talking monkey. I mean come on we all have a soft spot for Curious George and that monkey doesn’t even really talk, the man with the yellow hat, just makes us think we can understand him. That monkey could just be talking about throwing poo all the time and we would have no way of knowing that. But no the talking monkey butler, bet you didn’t think I knew that, can tell us what is going on. But that monkey butler is not my favorite character, or even in my top ten. Which is something special considering there are only a little over ten characters in the show.

No, my favorite character is Klaus, though I am probably more like Vanya then I would like to admit, but I’ll circle back to that in a moment, let me take a moment to talk about my favorite character Klaus. Klaus is the crazy fun that I wish that I could be. Not the drugs part, don’t do drugs kids, stay in school, ok now that I have that PSA (brought to you by the crazy rantings of a girl behind a computer), out of the way, I want to take a moment to do an appreciation paragraph about the wonderful Klaus.

Klaus is the crazy we all need in our lives. He makes the world seem just a little bit different, a little more interesting. He adds perfect comedic timing to the group, and he does it at just the right time. So, yeah Klaus is freaking amazing. Oh, and as an added note he looks great in a skirt.

See an appreciation paragraph. Now, onto Vanya. I see myself in Vanya, a lot more than anyone would like to admit. Hold it. Freeze. Yes, I mean you too. Don’t think about what I just said too much. I had a normal childhood. Well, normalish? But really, when you think about it, don’t we all have a few messed up things about our childhood. One or two things that give us that special little quirk. That little oddity, that would make people tilt their head. Yeah, well I had those. But for the most part I am normal. My childhood was normal, and my parent’s well they were as normal as parents can be. And I am not saying there aren’t a few things that my parents did that made me a little messed up, but isn’t that life. You’re a kid and you see things that your parents did wrong, even if it just one or two things, and you vow to do things differently, so then you screw up your own kids in a unique and different way, well that’s me, and that’s what I believe, but I may or may not still believe in the Easter Bunny, my traps are going to get that monster one of these days, so you probably shouldn’t take anything that I believe beyond face value.

Anyway, that got off topic, I mean I have no idea if there was even a point to all of that rambling, you know I have heard people call my writing pedantic before, and I never agreed with them until just now. I mean, I ended up talking about my plans to catch the Easter Bunny and not stay on the topic that I am supposed to be on. And now I am being pedantic about being pedantic, that takes a new level of crazy, or narcissism. I just love my writing so much, or maybe I just love to write so much.

Stopping that, and going back to the topic on hand, Vanya. Well, really, the topic is why Vanya and I are so similar. It’s simple really. I apologize for existing to. I never really thought about it that way before though. I just assumed I was apologizing for things that I should have done better, but no I have been apologizing for existing. I didn’t even realize that I was doing until there was that line about apologizing just for existing. Which is weird because, I always wanted to be an actress, ever since I was little, but I as I grew up, instead of still wanting to be in the spotlight I wanted to disappear. But this isn’t about that, not really anyway. We will spin back to why it is a little important in a moment.

But let me first say this, if I could draw I would. I would draw a kickass picture of Klaus in a skirt, maybe I would even add the talking monkey butler, yes, I know his name is Pogo, but give me a little credit for this bit. If I was good at outfits and designing and such nonsense I would cosplay as Mother. I know I just threw a curve ball or whatever the comic equivalent of that is. But you must love mother’s style. I mean it’s a classic elegance you can’t beat that. Well, maybe except for Klaus and a skirt, but I’m a girl and I can’t pull off a skirt like Klaus. Truth be told I only really have three talents.

First acting. As I’ve said before, being an actress has been my goal since I was very little. My problem is auditioning, and auditioning seems to be a very big part of the whole thing of being an actress, so in this case that talent seems a little bit useless. That talent in this case would be useless, most likely, in this case no matter if I could audition or not. Of course, like many of the other things I say hold onto that most likely because, of course, I will be coming back to that. Now my other two talents seem to be much more important now and much more important with why I started writing this in the first place.

The second one, as you hopefully, noticed my mediocre ability to write. I have seen that I have the smallest ability to write something that is readable and at least entertaining enough to keep you occupied, while doing menial tasks. Such as, but not limited to, using the bathroom, waiting at the dentist office, waiting at the DMV, procrastinating on doing any work that is much more important than my writing, that work seems hard and you really don’t want to start on a weird time or whatever else excuse you’re using the moment. And besides all that I’m almost done with this one, I think, I never can tell with my ramblings.

Last talent that I seem to have been bestowed is my vivid sometimes overused imagination. Now, what do you get when you have a writer with too much time, a laughably vivid imagination, and an extremely engaging and wonderful little show?

If you guessed a fanfiction with the author, no let me get this straight, I need to make sure that I get this right, a persona of the author, playing a major part, I would like you all to give yourselves a pat on the back, for the ones who didn’t get it right let me say you should stop reading this right now. Who my kidding? You’re not going to stop reading this. You aren’t going to go start your task they need to do. The dentist hasn’t just called you. And honestly you probably still have about two hours to wait at the DMV. Oh, as the right ones have guessed, this is a giant, wind bagged, and yes pedantic, way of introducing the fact that I have decided to put my writing of my Umbrella Academy fanfiction out not the real world.

Now, about five disclaimers though most of the people that I am addressing in this disclaimer had already written me, I’m sure, five Twitter messages ten emails, and twenty-five mean spirited letters, and have just ignored this disclaimer. And I know, this feels like the disclaimer to a medicine commercial, half the people aren’t paying attention, a quarter is going to still get upset when it happens to them and the last quarter are paying attention, but it doesn’t pertain to them. Also no one really watches regular tv that much anyway, they all have Netflix, free product placement.

First disclaimer, this is only based on the show. I bought the comic and I plan on reading it, I just haven’t had the time yet. And if I get interest, I may write one like the one I am currently writing with all of the information from the comics. Secondly, I’m doing this for fun, so please take it easy on me, if you like it, tell me, if you don’t tell me, if you think there are a few things I need to fix tell me, just do it nicely. Remember my writing may seem like I am a hot and legal combination of Klaus and Number Five, I am really just a Vanya at heart, so be delicate.

Thirdly, if either dark horse or Netflix asks me to take it down, it’s down without questions. I would hate for someone to not do the same for me.

Fourthly and lastly, promise, if Netflix and the writers want to take my twist on the story, let me a least fail at auditioning for a character that is basically me.

So, I hope you love my writing as much as I love Klaus, and the show, and hope you are a little more interested in it than I am in butler monkey.

Oh, and one more thing, I am going to be writing in both first person and third person. Me, or the character who I fantasize about being, is going to be told in first person. And scenes my character is not in will be third.

This is the opening for my blog which anyone who likes fanfiction, Umbrella Academy, and/or crazy rantings that might actually make sense, check it out. http://umberllacoverage.home.blog

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#the umbrella academy #umbrella acedmy #klaus #i love klaus #I'mVanya #Fanfiction

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kingdomofbretonxrpg · 3 years

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Congratulations, Steph! We are delighted to welcome Taney Hana to beautify (and sleep with) the citizens of the Kingdom of Breton. Please complete our after acceptance checklist. We are looking forward to seeing you develop her! Please send in her blog within 48 hours.

Out of Character

Alias: Steph (or Natty if you already have a Steph)

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Age: 31

Timezone: EST (US)

Anything else? I’m a teacher so while I will likely be extremely active this month that will change Aug. - May. Though I anticipate I should still be able to meet activity requirements, if that changes I won’t ghost, I’ll communicate what’s going on.

Character

Name: Taney Hana - She does not use her last name, but if she needs one: Derrien (you can change that if you’d like)

Birthdate and Age: 17 April + 31 years old

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Faceclaim: Rooney Mara

House Affiliation: Anjou

Profession: Owner of a exclusive private tattoo parlor, Asmodeus, Artist + Tattooist

Claim: Unclaimed

Children: None

Designation: Dominant

Sexuality: Identifies as “sexual” but we can call it pansexual if we need a deeper label

What is their symbol?: Has a sword with roses tattooed on the back of her right arm, but she has a lot of tattoos, so she’ll usually also wear earrings, necklaces, and rings with swords. If she’s wearing any shield symbol it would still have swords paired with it.

Kinks: Everything.

Anti-kinks: Taney’s never tried anything she didn’t enjoy and is open to trying anything 3 times before giving up on it. However, I’m not willing to write any play with bodily fluids other than blood; pretending to be adult/parent-child/step-child, incest, stepcest, etc.; pretending anything involving being a minor or assaulted. If the mun writing opposite wants to post a canon that their character came over and they pretended they were in some professor-student ‘give me an A if I xyz,” then they have my permission to godmod.

Biography:

There comes a time in every person’s youth when they go from playing with toys and being carefree to learning about the real world and worrying about something or other. For Taney, that happened a bit earlier than it had for everyone else. Her father was less than discrete when it came to cheating on his claim. Those submissives weren’t all completely competent, either. When it came time to put him in line, the man was nowhere to be found. His claim was left home alone with Taney and her older sister, Whitney. The shame of it all seemed to be unrelenting, taking a major toll on the girls’ mother. As submissive after submissive from every city he ever took a ‘business trip’ to seemed to pop into their lives looking for Master Derrien - some of which had children, it was Whit who took on the responsibility of raising Taney. It was saying a lot. Taney had always been a handful and as she went into school it was of little surprise that she’d be in near-constant trouble those first few years. At first, she wouldn’t stand for anyone speaking ill of her father, then her mother, then her sister or herself. Eventually everyone got what she was putting down, but nevertheless, it forced her to grow up.

When she was fifteen, nine years later, her father turned up for an unannounced visit. With no words exchanged about her mother and the obvious arrival during that transition time between school and when she would get home from work, Taney would later look on that moment and think that she should have known things were going to go down hill. Taney had already changed a bit and become very independent as that was the only way to survive a friendless childhood where your family name was known all too well. She took to sketching, drawing on herself in class, rarely doing anything she was told. Bad behaviors only made worse when, in these secret visits, her father tried to convince her that she could go live with him in the City of Lights with a new mother that would love her very much. He went on about it and tried to explain arranged claims to her, it wasn’t the first time she’d thought about love and the dom/sub dynamic, but she had learned right from wrong. It also helped that Whitney didn’t seem to be buying into a word he said either. Pulling a knife and lighter, she kept on her person in case she ran away and needed it, Taney stabbed his hand and lit his sleeve on fire. The punishment for the attack was both literal and social. People either admired her or feared her and, with some unwilling therapy, she was lucky enough to face long term repercussions for the attack- mostly because it led to the delayed punishment of her father.

With money running low, Whit joined her mother and had taken up a job at Castlebrac while Taney bounced around from school to school. Simply put, it wasn’t enough to cover their father’s debts and mother’s habits. Once Taney was of age she made the decision, albeit one her mother and sister would deem to be ungrateful, and dropped out of school to complete a general education degree and get out of dodge. Taney had very little knowledge of the ‘real world’; she had practically no ambitions. Nevertheless, the desire to walk away from Breton and never look back seemed more appealing than anything else. So she waitressed, did an office admin gig, played guitar in a mediocre cover band for weddings, this and that, until she’d saved up a decent amount of money. Moving to California for a while she lived on the streets and sold her body for drugs and money. State by state and country to country, she said she’d try her luck in some place new and always did put in a decent effort- at least at first. Taney worked as a bartender, tattoo artist, mechanic, technician, and drug dealer as she made her way around the globe, a young woman consumed by wanderlust and living in hostels or cheap motels until the money ran out.

Taney arrived in New York at twenty-four and it would be the first place she managed to live a whole year. Something about putting down roots encouraged her to spend every bit of strength to stay sober and clean, smoking and drinking remaining her only vices. Noted as short tempered but sweet once you got to know her, Taney was the hostess at a bondage bar in the city called Paddles. Though her everyday look wasn’t as rough and tough as it used to be when she lived on the streets, she still had a very particular air about her- especially when she was at work, and sometimes when she’s not- particularly in the bedroom. Her ability to flirt (or taunt) people into curiosity led to two things, a career change back into sexwork and an unaddressed addiction to something more taboo. However, after an unsavory interaction with a famous client, the company offered an exorbitantly large settlement, giving her an opportunity she never thought she would have. The settlement meant more than an opportunity to travel or leave the job, it was her ticket home.

Feeling like the runaway gig was officially a bust, she tried to reach out to her family in Breton. Whit was the one that told her their mother was ‘gone’ and left it at that. The bitterness of being left behind never sat right with Whitney and the chasm between the sisters only grew when Taney offered her part of the settlement as a way for Whitney to find her own path. Whitney agreed to take what Taney was offering, claiming that it would help her settle some debts. Then, while Taney decided how she wanted to make her way back to Breton, she got a call from a member of House Anjou. Whitney was missing, debts certainly not paid and when she’d been told her mother was ‘gone’ it was a similar scenario. Taney settled into more traveling rather than going back. Maybe a part of her was looking for the family that abandoned her- or she’d abandoned. All the while she honed her craft as a tattooist, growing a clientele through social media and word of mouth. After half a decade of tying up the loose ends her family left behind, Taney bought a small shop with a two bedroom flare over it. Breton, despite all the bad memories she’d had there, was home.

Asmodeus didn’t open as soon as she’d bought the place. Taney had a lot of work to do fixing it up and used this as an excuse to ‘come back quietly’. For the most part she assumed people didn’t remember her, the little sister of the ruined family. Everyone except her had some sort of track record. That wait was spent coding her website, posting promos, and perfecting her watercolor technique and improving her skills in the other styles she had learned in her travels that clients may want. There were some circumstances in between that truly changed her life, a gaslighting non-committal relationship where she saw the person she thought she could open up to show their true colors, casting doubt on her trust in the concept of love and commitment once more. Taney truthfully knew she wasn’t the typical person to catch feelings for. She was promiscuous and happy about it, volatile and reckless, and eccentrically honest. There were just two people outside of her family that could claim to have ever known her beyond the surface and she’d wholly burnt those bridges upon her departure from their respective cities. In her stubbornness refusing to become shackled by societal norms and labels. Though she’s very obviously happier than she’s ever been, she still struggles with her health, including sex addiction, and trusting people- let alone letting anyone in. Many have tried, no one has succeeded or come out unscathed. Be careful what you wish for, if you’re curious to get to know her, she’s likely to pounce- as she’s equal parts sarcasm, quick wit, and horny as hell… a place which she’s inarguably the Queen.

#bretonaccepted #taney hana #rooney mara #accepted

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thephantomprojectionist · 7 years

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Long Review: Death Fighter (2017)

"What's the matter, never humped a rock before?"

While every other martial arts fan was watching the long-awaited Boyka: Undisputed IV a couple weeks ago, I was getting my hands on a more low-profile release called Death Fighter. I regret that decision, now. While looking up lower-profile movies has served me well in the past, it led to a disappointment this time. After having its release pushed back repeatedly for several years, this film finally reveals that it has little more going for it than a supergroup of karate stars and a few surprises. While there are some things that I like and admire about this one, I have to admit that it’s just too plain to hang with its more substantial competition.

The story: A renegade FBI agent (Matt Mullins) teams up with an ex-military mercenary (Don Wilson) to take down a dangerous kingpin (Gigi Velicitat) in the Thai jungle.

Ensemble casting is so common now that it’d almost be a bigger surprise to feature less than four prominent names in an action movie, but Death Fighter certainly secured an iconic draw. In addition to XMA champ Mullins and kickboxing hall-of-famer Wilson, the cast packs two more legends in Cynthia Rothrock as one of the evil lieutenants and the late Joe Lewis as Mullins’ doomed partner. Throw in rising genre staple Jawed El Berni and you can see why I had such high hopes for this. However, the utilization of its stars is the main reason I’m unhappy with the film. Only the acrobatic El Berni delivers approximate to his reputation; everyone else is in trouble.

Matt Mullins: I’ve been waiting for this guy to step up and become the next Scott Adkins ever since I first saw him in Adventures of Johnny Tao. With Death Fighter being technically his first vehicle in 12 years, I thought it’d be the stepping stone he needed to get people at large to notice him…but now, I have doubts about his potential. Matt shows off his martial skills just fine, but jeez, are both he and his character ever bland! Mullins comes off as a Ken doll, and is absolutely unremarkable beyond his fight scenes. Adkins is no master thespian but at least he can create a memorable character, whereas Mullins barely creates an impression. Were it not for Matt’s physicality, anybody could’ve played this role.

Don Wilson: The opposite of his younger costar, Wilson is charismatic but totally unprepared for the movie’s style of action. Choreographer Patrick Tang favors a flashy, acrobatic style of fight scene, but Wilson isn’t about to change up his usual grounded game for anybody. Though Don’s brawls feature significantly less slow motion than his regular fare, they’re noticeably slower and less creative than anybody else’s – giving the impression that everyone had to go at half-speed with the old man.

Joe Lewis: Speaking of old men, the late karate god is in decisively poor shape. I know Joe was in failing health at this time in his life and thus excuse much about his utilization, but he still seems poorly-placed in an action-packed film like this. He briefly beats up a henchman and engages in a shootout before being killed off only a few minutes into the movie. Whereas his previous role in Kill ‘Em All seemed like an appropriate sendoff to the grandmaster’s film career, this almost seems like an unwanted obligation.

Cynthia Rothrock: Having previously stated that she’d like to do at least one more Hong Kong film in her life, I’d hoped that the similar style of this picture might be the opening Cynthia needed to remind the world that she’s an action legend. Not so. Rothrock seems awkwardly cast in her supporting role, playing second fiddle to a performer less charismatic than she (Velicitat), and like Wilson, her two fights leave a lot to be desired. Her dream match against Don is particularly disappointing, featuring some cruddy camerawork.

Nevertheless, the picture has some noteworthy redeeming traits. Despite my complaints about some of the fighters’ individual performances, I’m still generally pleased by the action content. Though he doesn’t properly distinguish himself from other performers who utilize the tricking style, Matt Mullins is well-matched against Jawed El Berni and the various Thai stuntmen, making for occasionally nice showdowns. However, the film’s trump cards aren’t any of its advertised performers, but rather two hitherto-unknown costars who just about blow their cohorts out of the water. Chiranan Manochaem is introduced as a dramatic performer and potential love interest to Matt Mullins, but explodes onto the adrenaline scenes with some impressive fights, making her arguably the best-utilized performer of the bunch. Less of a character but definitely the best onscreen fighter is Prasit Suanphaka, playing Don Wilson’s near-stoic sidekick. I’ll be really disappointed if this guy gets lost among the masses of stunt guys in Thailand, because he’s one of the most versatile and unhinged performers I’ve lately seen leading a fight scene. With a brawling style that’s a fair mix of Tony Jaa and Jackie Chan, he’s one guy who should definitely been in more movies.

Other positive things I noticed include the refreshingly layered participation of women in the action scenes. I recently wrote an essay on the depiction of women in martial arts films, and it seems as though the filmmakers were thinking along similar lines regarding exceptionalism. Chiranan Manochaem soundly dismantles any demure expectations you develop about her character leading up to her first fight (demonstrating that women can be action participants and supporting stars at the same time), and Cynthia Rothrock’s otherwise disappointing casting as an enforcer helps level the field between the sexes and makes the sight of women fighting men less extraordinary than filmmakers often perpetuate. A subplot involving human trafficking isn’t handled with as much gravitas as I’d hoped (it takes a backseat to the personal revenge angle), but it isn’t played for titillation. Not only that, but – for the first time I’ve ever seen in a U.S. production – the kidnapped women are rescued by another woman. These are small touches, but the effect they have on the presentation is noteworthy.

If there were only such aspects to consider and the handful of weird B-grade moments (e.g. a kid thinks it’s funny when a murder victim’s blood pours onto his head), the film might yet manage to shine a little. Disappointingly, the technical presentation keeps viewers from properly engaging with the story. While the movie can get its plot from A to B, choppy editing frequently gives a strained feel to conversations, fight scenes, and montages. The presence of some naturally pretty scenery merely draws attention to the lack of standout cinematography. Also, the movie’s tone can shift so drastically at times that it can be like watching two different films: it favors a refreshingly optimistic outlook wherein characters develop genuine bonds and manage overcome personal problems, but it can quickly turn around and become quite grim, like the rather gratuitous throat-slitting scene. This film wasn’t rated by the MPAA, but I can see it getting one of those ironic R ratings based on just a couple of scenes. (For the record, it’s gotten a 14^ rating in Canada.)

Outright lack of quality isn’t Death Fighter’s failing point so much as mediocrity. While a movie like this would be a decent watch in most circumstances, the amount of talent involved makes it all the more disappointing when you see how little the filmmakers did with their resources. It makes me fear for the career of Matt Mullins: Rothrock and Wilson subsequently showed themselves prepared to shape up in The Martial Arts Kid (produced after this one but released earlier), and the sheer amount of movies coming out of Thailand assures me that I’ll probably see Manochaem and Suanphaka again, but Mullins probably had a lot riding on this for his prospective solo career. He’ll always be able to find stuntwork and supporting roles, but if this is all he can do when the spotlight’s on him, I have a feeling that it won’t grace him many times more. However, responsibility for the picture’s quality ultimately falls on the filmmakers: to the extent that director Toby Russell wasn’t hampered by producers, he’s demonstrated that he needs more practice in producing a standout karate film and, for the time being, should stick to documentaries.

Death Fighter (AKA White Tiger) (2017) Directed by Toby Russell (Cinema of Vengeance) Written by Lawrence Riggins (Replicant) Starring Matt Mullins, Don Wilson, Chiranan Manochaem, Gigi Velicitat (The Mark) Cool costars: Prasit Suanphaka, Cynthia Rothrock, Jawed El Berni (Ninja II: Shadow of a Tear), Joe Lewis Title refers to: The official title could refer to virtually any of the above-mentioned performers, whereas the working title refers to Matt Mullins. (Don Wilson: “Sometimes, it takes a stubborn tiger like you to get a reluctant lion like me to fight. And you’re white.”) Content warning: Kidnapping, implied torture, violence against women, extreme violence Copyright Vision Films, Inc.

#film review #martial arts film #martial arts films #matt mullins #don wilson #cynthia rothrock #gigi velicitat #joe lewis #prasit suanphaka #chiranan manochaem #thailand

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funamuseawritings · 7 years

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Could I be boring, and request a thing of Sol, Elux's head angel, exploring the heaven, and checking everything is in order with the other angels? I know it's a really open ended request, sorry!!

It was another busy evening in the world resting upon the darkened clouds. The thunder crackled as lightning flashed, dancing all around the land below them, giving a beautiful show to those who paid attention. A few angels had geared themselves up properly for another investigation around the atmosphere, making sure to keep clear of any enemies trying to invade. Elux, after all, never enjoyed intruders, and nobody can visit them without permission unless they want to be beaten to a pulp by their well-prepared guards, unless your name was Fumus, the one god allowed on stage without question. Sol, on one hand, wasn’t a part of the investigation crew today. Nor did she have to do paperwork. Nor did she have any formations to organize. Nor did she have to kiss Elux’s shoe for the seventh time today, yet at least.

War had ended a long time ago, ever since Reficul has kept extremely quiet down below. People have gotten severely suspicious of her silence, not a single soldier or demon ever peeked their out from those clouds. For angels, it’s extremely difficult to get past those harsh winds and rough cycles, as it could tear apart their wings from their bodies and break limbs from how intense it was, but demons had a much easier time due to constantly being exposed to the weather. So it would make sense for them to keep coming. Maybe Reficul has finally surrendered and doesn’t want to lose anymore units, but Sol, not even Elux have a final decision on that. As cunning and manipulative this heaven is, they are professional at what they do.

Sol slowly arose from her seat at her desk, excusing herself out from her office and from the side building from the castle. She gazed along the roaring clouds from down below, idly floating off and away from the building and off to the work shop. Gazing softly over, she could see that Mars was working with the evening crew for investigation, but considering their sterned faces and how eccentric he looked, he was probably talking about his bird obsession again. Sol chuckled to herself at the sight. Dear Elux, did he love his birds.

As the seraph landed, she glanced upon the moderate sized building, with a bunch of advertisments thrown along the sides of the building, talking about sales, certain discounts, and under rated and mediocre models of equipment being buy two, get two free. A soft smile crossed her face; seems like Mercury has having trouble with the customers again. While she was a great engineer, she was also terrible with customer service, and her aggressive attitude doesn’t help her at all in the end. She often scares customers off, but she’s also the best person to fix your equipment first try. If something’s wrong, she’s the one to go to. Most of the time, common customers either have to suck it up, or just enjoy her anger.

Gingerly opening the door, Sol peeked her head in, not seeing Mercury first, but rather, Luna. Sol widened her eyes in mild surprise. “Oh, Luna, it’s really nice to see you.” She spoke loudly, Luna looking a bit startled as her attention was called for. “What are you doing here instead of Mercury? You don’t work here; you work on the interrogation and discussion center, don’t you?” Sol tried to reassure the shy angel with her warming smile, which seemed to work as her shoulder became less tense as she shifted in place.

“U-Uhm.. Mercury said she was working on something, s-so uh, she called me over to temporarily be in charge while she’s in the back? I-I should be asking why you’re here, Sol..” She occasionally averted eye contact, but it was much less than what it would be with a stranger. Sol tapped her chin in thought. What could Mercury possibly be working on? ‘We don’t need strong weapons right now, nor do we need improved armor…’ She idly thought, before tilting her head at Luna.

“Do you know what she’s working on?” Sol inquiried, as it was followed with Luna shook her head.

“She just said that it was going to be the discovery of a lifetime.”

“Can I go see her?”

“U-Uh, she told me nobody s-should go back there right no–”

“Luna, please? You know I won’t do anything irrational. If you keep hiding it, you’re going to make me worried.”

Luna swallowed the knot in her throat, not really sure to do since she was pushed. She nervously tapped her fingers together, before her voice nervously cracked. “O-Okay… J-Just don’t blame me if Mercury gets mad at you.” She croaked, gesturing over to the door that led to the back of the building. Sol nodded her head with a ‘thank you’, and offered Luna up for dinner later for her troubles. Luna shook nervously as Sol slowly left the front room and ventured into the back. The hallway was very cramped and cluttered, with a bunch of small storage rooms stuffed to the brim with random junk. Mercury was always a horder, and always had shit stuffed into places, somehow managing to fit everything in such tiny rooms.

As she approached the back, a curtain laid across the end of the hallway. Sol gives a firm knock to the corner of the wall, before peeking through the curtain. All she sees is a startled Mercury who protectively goes over her current work and hisses. “Who is it?! What do you wan– Oh, Sol, it’s you. Welcome.” She corrected herself, slowly leaning up, shoving her goggles up. “It’s good to see you, but I could’ve gotten a warning first.”

“Sorry, I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

“I’m doing great, actually! I have some exciting news.” She gained a mischievious grin onto her face, before pulling her body away from her work. Sol approached slowly to the side of the table, observing over the object that laid before it. It was a type of weaponry, almost almost like a gun, adorned with crosses and with the symbol of their military that everybody wore on buttons; a star, and wrapped with a vibrant red ribbon to represent Elux’s willingness to draw blood. If the gun was set onto its butt in the ground, the end of the barrel would reach to at least Sol’s chest. It was impressive in size, compared to the normal guns, sure, but what caught Sol’s eye the most was how the barrel was set up. It had a rough twist near the base, where the ejector and extractor was. Surely, that made it unable to use bullets, so what was its purpose…?

“What’s that for?” Sol muttered, thinking aloud. “Surely, it’s not just a gun. I know you’d make something more interesting than that.” She snided, both of the seraphs chuckling at such a witty response.

“I would show you, but it hasn’t worked yet.” Mercury smirked. “But I’m trying to figure a way down to the surface without literally dooming ourselves to eternal damnation.” She proudly leaned over her invention, petting it as if it was her child she’s put so much dedication and work into. “We can’t go around it, so the only way is go through it. Our gear doesn’t protect us, no matter how much stronger we make it… So why don’t we just blow apart that shield they’re oh so proud of?”

Sol chuckled softly to herself. “Are you planning for an invasion?”

“That’s what the boss asked for. She hates that damn devil so much, she just wants rid of her. Too much trash in their castle’s basement, they said.”

The two angels looked at each other once the devil was mentioned, before their eyes parted ways to look to the side. Silence had awkwardly slipped its way into the conversation, their lips sealed, as if almost for a moment of silence in respect of what’s happened.

“… Hey, Sol.”

“Yes, Mercury?”

“Do you think she’s ever gonna come back?”

Mercury looked a bit concerned as she stared back at Sol. Sol tilted her head, furrowing her brow for a moment. Yes, everybody does miss her. She was a very good soldier, and a very good friend, especially to the black haired seraph herself. As Sol took a moment to think about just what to say, she finally spoke once more.

“That girl… She’s the devil now. She can’t come back. It hurts my heart to say, but Lord Elux would never allow it. Besides, she’s betrayed us and everyone here. We can never forgive her, especialyl if Lord Elux says not to.” Sol admitted it loudly, though her voice full of mournfulness and rue, practically every word she spoke dripping in it. Mercury frowned a little more, though didn’t say much more. She knew Sol was right, and all it did was hurt. There was nothing to be proud of here.

“But…” Sol started once more, catching Mercury’s attention. “We can always hope. Lord Elux is very stubborn, but they might just change their mind.. If they don’t, well..” Sol gained her smile once more, but yet, it had a cruel edge to it, much unlike her gentle, but stern nature. “The devil… She must be suffering down there. She was our friend once, and there’s nothing we can do to save her. Why should we let her suffer? Shouldn’t we, as friends, put her out of misery?”

Mercury gazed upon Sol for a moment, before gaining the same smirk back. “Yes. You’re right. How inconsiderate of us, my apologies.”

#HOLY CRAP THIS IS LONG #mod syake #sol (mogeko)#mercury (mogeko)#luna (mogeko)#elux (mention)#reficul (mention)#implied murder #lore building #casual #the gray garden #mogeko #funamusea #deep sea prisoner #request #Anonymous #sfw

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schpiedehl · 7 years

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An open letter to Hamilton (etc) fan artists, Re:whitewashing

Hello. Time for another ill-constructed rant on probably already well-tread ground. Specifically whitewashing in fan art (even more specifically Hamilton art though this could be applied to any fandom) and when it is ok. lol jk it’s never ok. PLEASE NOTE: I am an (amateur) artist. I am not ragging on artists because I “don’t understand how hard making art is,” “how hard artists work,” or what have you. These are legitimate problems of representation in fanart (that I have witnessed firsthand) and this is my earnest attempt to elucidate these issues. Feel free to interact with this post as you see fit. I am always free for debate if you disagree, would like clarification, or have anything to add.

+Look out for those embedded hyperlinks for more content

Preface: I am a member of far too many fb Hamilton groups. Sometimes people post their art, apparently forgetting that when you post things online you open yourself to critique. Hilarity ensues.

I often see Hamilton characters (generally portrayed as original Broadway cast members - Lin-Manuel Miranda, Okieriete Onaodowan, Anthony Ramos, etc.) who have been horrifically whitewashed - complete with lightened skin, bizarrely red or light brown hair, lightened eyes, and so forth. The most common defenses for this misstep, from both artists and fans, are personal style and apparent inability to approximate accurate skin tone (“I tried but skin color is hard”). Here’s why both of those excuses are utter bullshit.

1. Personal Style:

A lot of things in life are open to interpretation and all art is inherently interpretive. But the racial and cultural identity of a real life person is not one of these interpretive things. [PAUSE: before anyone says that this is precisely what Hamilton is doing with its casting, don’t.] First of all, I get it, personal style is important to art. Some people trend toward realism while others prefer more abbreviated, abstracted, and/or cartoony styles and part of that is selecting stylized color palettes, interpreting color in new and inventive ways, and playing with light, value, line, form, etc. This is NOT what I am talking about. It is entirely possible to honor a person’s background using relative or approximated shading/tone/coloration and to create beautiful art in the process [example: Chris Vision’s color series]. This little rant is specifically directed at people who "attempt" to depict Hamilton (etc) actors/characters using realistic/semi-realistic color palettes (as in, how they appear irl, accounting for abstraction, drawing style, etc) but fall short when it comes to depicting the actors, particularly in regards to racial background. You can find excellent examples of what I mean at Calling Out Whitewashed Hamilton Art and I’m positive you can find far too many examples in this and many other fandoms simply by scrolling through the tags on Tumblr and Instagram. So without further ado, lightening a person/character’s skin in fanart is racist. There’s really no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Foremost, the practice of editing a person of color to appear more European (skin, hair, eyes, even facial features) intentionally erases the cultural, racial, and ethnic background of the person in question. This is incredibly disrespectful to the actors who portray these characters and works to undermine what Hamilton as a whole is trying to build. If Hamilton is trying to reclaim American history for People of Color, stripping the racial, ethnic, and cultural backgrounds from the actors represents a rejection of conceit and, perhaps, even a form of appropriation. It is as though “fans” are saying that they want the art that is made by and for POC while simultaneously rejecting the distinctly racialized aspects of that art. When artists depict Lin!Hamilton as white, they are rejecting the Nuyorican background which Lin brings to the character in both writing and performance and projecting faux whiteness upon the character. In doing so, whether consciously or not, they are rejecting the actor’s race as well. Lin is beloved because of the art that he makes which allows many fans to look past his racial and cultural identity rather than accept it as an intrinsic aspect of both the man and his art. Moreover, the ubiquity of this whitewashed art also reveals a lot about what “fans” find visually appealing and acceptable - e.g., the Eurocentric standard of beauty. Whitewashing in art represents not only a rejection of POC’s culture but, obviously, their physical attributes as well. Dark skin is lightened and or whitened, hair is often straightened and/or lightened to a light brown or red hue (with the exception of Laurens, whose features, hair in particular, are often feminized as a form a queer fetishization but that is a rant for another day), and features are changed to appear more European. Often, depictions of characters are changed so much it is nearly impossible to tell that the art is based on any particular actor. In addition to being, again, extremely disrespectful to the actors, this further perpetuates the extremely harmful notion that beauty only exists in European features and sends a direct message to POC fans that their appearance is neither beautiful not accepted by the fanbase of a piece of media that was made by other POC specifically to appeal to them. This seems especially true of dark skinned black individuals who are often completely stripped of the melanin in fan art, further driving home notions of ingrained cultural colorism and anti-blackness. With Hamilton in particular, it is fine to “change” a character’s race if and only if you are depicting a character as a different actor. For instance, while Lin!Hamilton is Latino, Michael!Hamilton is a black man and depicting Hamilton as such, while uncommon among fan communities, is better than fine [*the lack of art of dark skinned actors is another point of contention. Not only are dark skinned actors frequently whitewashed, many are ignored altogether]. Depicting Michael!Hamilton as light skinned or white, however, is obviously not fine. Having established that lightening a character’s skin or depicting them with more European features is inherently racist, the claim that whitewashing is a stylistic choice is invalid. If you make the “stylistic choice” to depict a POC as white, you are racist. End of story. And if you want to do better but find yourself wanting to draw Lin!Hamilton as white, remember that this guy existed and just draw him instead. It’s not that hard. 2. Technical Difficulties:

One of the most unfortunately common excuses for whitewashing in fanart seems to be that, for some reason or another, artists have difficulty accurately approximating actors’ skin color so they presumedly just make something up, This results in Lin!Hamilton and Phillipa!Eliza looking a bit like Snow White, Oak!Mulligan looking a little tan, and so forth. As an artist, I understand that approximating realistic skintones can be rather hard, especially with traditional mediums, but it is glaringly obvious when artists don’t put in any effort. With traditional mediums such as paint, markers, or color pencils, artists can blend to create the colors which accurately (or as accurately as possible given the limitations of certain mediums like watercolors) approximate actors’ skin tones. If the colors dry lighter than intended, the artist generally layer and blend more to achieve a better approximation. If they then scan their image, they can use a photo editor to fix or correct any mistakes. It might not be the easiest to find good matches (speaking from experience, there aren’t a ton of good warm brown toned markers and thus a lot of blending is sometimes required) but, as previously stated, it’s generally easy to tell when someone at least tried to get close to a correct skin tone. With digital art, it’s even easier. Fact: Nearly all art programs have a nifty eyedropper tool which can be used to pull color swatches directly from a reference picture. Even MSpaint has this function. By pulling multiple swatches from a variety of reference images (to account for different lighting conditions), an artist can build a relatively accurate gradiented palette for skin tone. It’s really that simple! And if an artist notices that the color isn’t quite right, it’s nothing a few tweaks to hue and saturation can’t fix! If my tone seemed a bit sarcastic/passive aggressive in that last paragraph, it’s because it totally was. I see this excuse so much more often than I see any other excuse for whitewashed fan art and it is incredibly frustrating but also, as an (extraordinarily mediocre) artist myself, it rings incredibly inaccurate, especially for digital art. I completely understand that it sometimes takes a lot of time to get used to a medium but when an artist’s color palette is literally limitless, there is absolutely no reason (aside from personal, possibly subconscious/implicit but no less real, biases) for an actor/character to be depicted as white/light skinned when they are not. As previously discussed, that is disrespectful and harmful, and really only serves to make the artist (and those that support work) look like a jackass. And look, if you find yourself making whitewashed art, it’s not as though it is impossible to change. When someone criticizes your whitewash-y art, don’t get defensive. Don’t claim that it’s your style or that you don’t know how to color POC. It looks and sounds really fucking ridiculous. Instead, evaluate your art and place it into a cultural context. Take it as an opportunity to improve. And maybe also take the opportunity to learn a little about yourself and your biases. This wasn’t meant to be a call out post and I’d like to end this on a positive note so here are a few wonderful Hamilton fan artists who are worth a look: terror-in-a-dream zzzoehsu linmanwhydididothis mikiprice thegentlehoneybee dorothywonderland maeng

#hamilton #lin-manuel miranda #fanart #fan art #whitewashing #racism #longpost #rant #daveed diggs #Okieriete Onaodowan #phillipa soo #alexander hamilton #anthony ramos #lams #discourse #Renee Elise Goldsberry #john laurens #michael luwoye #jasmine cephas jones

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ourmrmel · 5 years

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Mel Feller Looks at High Dollar Days off in Your Business

Let me start by posing a question, would you pay somebody $10,200 to ‘hold down the fort’ while you had a day off? If this sounds like an expensive day off to you prepare to be shocked: there are far too many business owners who pay this kind of money to non-performing employees for little more than having somebody in the office while the owner rests or goes on vacation.

As a business and executive coach, I see several instances daily. In fact, I recently spoke to one business owner who was on the verge of closing his doors. He cut almost every expense he could; he even considered operating out of his home. This owner’s wife went to work every day. The leader worked hard every day. However, one expense this owner refused to cut was the salary of an ‘employee’ that had not made a sale in over two months.

There comes a time when ‘nice person’ turns into ‘soft touch’. This employee was taking advantage of an owner, who was too weak to terminate the services of a chronic non-performer. For a person to draw a salary yet steadfastly refuse to do the actions that lead to results is, in my book, fraud. If a person will not do the actions, and will not either begin doing the actions or resign, this should be a criminal offence, to me, it is taking money under false pretenses. Heck, I even had to fire my ex-wife because of her nonperformance.

If this sounds like an extreme case to you, it is not. Although most business owners would not allow an employee to go two months without making a sale, many will allow team members to turn mediocrity into a career path.

While they may not pay $10,200 for a day off, these owners still pay huge amounts for the luxury of time away from the office. Any money paid to non-performing employees is totally wasted. In addition, if you are paying people like this ask yourself, “Why am I doing this?” Is it because you are too weak to fire them, lack the skill to lead them, or because you ‘need’ them because not having them means you have to perform more? Think about it, all of the aforementioned things are costing you big dollars! Never the less, none of these are valid excuses for holding onto non-performers.

In our coaching, Coaching for Success 360, I show business owners how much profit they lose by not having their team size at optimum level – at least four of your expenses are around $50,000 per month. A team of five will be more than $100,000 more profitable per annum than a team of three at the same level of income. The team size, however, does not refer to just the number of people on the team.

To get this extra profit, all team members must produce approximately the same income per month. This means that your team must be consistent performers. It also means that as a leader you must become obsessed with building a winning team, not just a sales team of a specific size. All people on your team must perform.

Instead of working with people who show no signs of improvement, the business owner who paid a non-performer $10,200 for no sales would have done better had he put that money into hiring advertisements.

Had he done twenty “First Interviews” with potential winners each month, he would have been able to part company with somebody who clearly will not do the necessary actions to succeed and give an opportunity to an enthusiastic recruit who would.

The trouble is this business owner had hardly done a “First” Interview all year. Without the hope of fresh people joining the team, he held onto a ‘no-hoper’. The result: the business was devastated.

So the next time you reach the end of the month and see that one or more of your people have not performed to your standard ask yourself, “If I keep this person, am I paying big bucks just to have a day off?” I want you to be honest. Then act.

Why Use Mel Feller

Mel Feller is a business coach who helps individuals make the transition from full-time employee to successful entrepreneur. A grandfather now, Mel Feller started his coaching business in 1990 to help other parents, employees and individual entrepreneurs deal with the sometimes-overwhelming prospect of starting a new business while still running a household or a job. Prior to raising his family, as a single father, Mel Feller spent over two decades as Top Producing Real Estate Agent, corporate trainer and workshop leader and Chief of Staff to a United States Senator. Today Mel Feller offers a wide range of programs and services - from individual coaching, to seminars and keynote speeches. To contact Mel Feller, please visit his website http://www.melfellersuccessstories.com

Mel understands how to help people create momentum for change in their life and how to break through the barriers holding them back. He is a big believer in taking concrete steps forward every day. Mel was stuck and more than once and so he knows firsthand how hard it can be to change your life to pursue your dreams, but he is living proof that it can be done.

It is his mission to help you get into the life you dream about, to convince you that you can make a living doing what it is you want to be doing, to help you feel like you are living your purpose and in congruency with your values.

“Truth telling, honesty, and candor: I loved you Mel Feller! You have so much energy and knowledge! I truly hope I get another opportunity to be coached by you. I see myself a little clearer now, and it’s not so bad.”

Lisa Mathews

“Mel Feller you added more value than we can possibly see right now. Mel Feller, you are warm, inviting, and accommodating. Thank you for coming alongside us in this transition!”

Vanessa Cavanaugh

“Mel Feller the best education session that we have attended in many years! Thank you so much — I am very excited to put everything you have taught us into practice!”

Michael Randolph

“Mr. Mel Feller, Thank you, thank you, thank you for giving a marvelous keynote at our Symposium! While we have not yet collected the official feedback, the unofficial feedback was that You Were a Hit! I heard nothing but compliments regarding your presentations. Thank you for making such a positive impact on our attendees! ”

Lyle Cunningham VP

"Mel Feller uses his humor, compassion, and direct nature to help bring out the best in me. Mel Feller is committed to helping me live...I mean, really live, life to its fullest."

Jose Rodriguez

Mel Feller Links

https://www.instagram.com/mel.feller

https://ourmrmel.tumblr.com/

https://www.pinterest.com/cfs360/

https://twitter.com/melfeller/following

https://wordpress.com/page/melfellerinternetbusinessinnovations.wordpress.com

https://dribbble.com/melfeller

https://biggerpockets.com/forums/79/topics/49008-larry-goins-bootcamp

https://txbusinessdb.com/p/mel-feller

https://xindex.com/c/12031660488/mel-feller-financial-services-group-inc

https://buzzfile.com/business/Coaching-For-Success-940-569-9260

https://melfellerrealestateinnovations.wordpress.com

https://myspace.com/mfcfs360

https://goodreads.com/user/show/86266194-mel-feller

https://mfcfs.contently.com

https://alignable.com/wichita-falls-tx/coaching-for-success-360

https://quora.com/profile/Mel-Feller

https://about.me/melfeller

https://independent.academia.edu/MelFeller

https://medium.com/@mfcfs360

https://melfellerentrepreneurialideas.wordpress.com

https://about.me/melfeller

https://thecoachingoffice.com

https://quora.com/profile/Mel-Feller

https://linkedin.com/pulse/reflections-journaling-mel-feller-mel-feller

https://creonline.com/finally-my-first-deal

https://etrainingguide.com

https://reitips.com/open-letter

https://thecoachingoffice.com/testimonials.html

https://fortunebuilders.com/student-success-old/testimonials/page/9

https://agrandpaslove.blogspot.com

https://plus.google.com/u/0

https://youtube.com/channel/UCk_zDXJgadnWwmab0PhaIkQ/videos

https://linkedin.com/in/mel-feller

https://challengesinlife.com

https://melfellersuccessstories.com

https://melfeller.com

https://melfellerbusinessblog.com

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