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dandylovesturtles · 5 months

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havin' all these Splinter and Leo thoughts. augh.

this is partly the fault of @/turtleblogatlast's post about Leo just wanting to make Splinter proud.

post-movie

...

Seven days post-invasion, and Leo is feeling (relatively) pretty good. Sure, he's still on a truly ridiculous amount of painkillers and he can't walk two steps without collapsing, but he's able to stay awake and talk to his family and considering where he thought he would be right about now, well... that's everything.

So yeah, he's feeling pretty good. He just finished his lunch of soup and a protein shake, warm and a little drowsy while he listens to April talk about some of the more ridiculous conspiracy theories that have started spreading on the surface. Donnie's tinkering with one of his smaller inventions while he listens, Mikey is nestled in Raph's lap, and everything is calm and cozy in their makeshift medbay.

And then his dad walks in and says, "I would like to talk to Blue, please. Alone."

And suddenly Leo doesn't feel so good anymore.

"Aha, wait," he says quickly, reaching out and grabbing April's sleeve just before she rises from her chair. "Whatever it is, you can say it in front of everyone, right?"

Splinter shakes his head. "This is a conversation I think it is best we have in private." He makes a shooing motion at the others, and April pulls her sleeve from Leo's fingers with a helpless shrug.

"See ya in a few, Leo," she says, then walks out. The others look from Splinter, to him, then back to Splinter, and one by one they each get up and shuffle out, too, with their own hasty farewells.

Traitors, every single one of them.

The door closes, and Leo finds himself alone with Splinter for the first time since coming back from Staten Island. Or at least, the first time he can remember. He was pretty out of it the first few days; most of what he remembers is muddled and confused. And embarrassing. He cried a lot more than he'd care to admit.

Splinter hops into chair April was sitting in and pulls it closer; he has to stay standing to be anywhere near eye level with Leo. He wishes he could read Splinter's face, but his expression is giving nothing away. Sometimes it's easy to forget he spent a not-insignificant part of his life as an actor, until something like this happens.

Leo decides to speak before he can. Head him off at the pass, or something.

"If you're going to yell at me, just remember my eardrums are already damaged."

Which is true - turns out being 1, too close to an exploding alien spaceship and 2, getting punched in the head repeatedly by an alien very mad about said exploding spaceship is bad for the ears, even when you don't have outer ears like a human. So super loud noises are a bad idea right now, and thus Leo cannot be yelled at. Flawless logic; maybe he can keep using that every time he gets in trouble.

For the first time, his dad's expression shifts, just a little. A deeper frown, a heavier set to his brow.

"You think I came in here to yell at you?"

Leo feels his stomach twist. Does he have to spell it out? "I mean, didn't you? That's usually what kicking everyone else out is leading up to."

"I see..." Splinter is still unreadable, looking a little too intensely at Leo. "And what do you think I want to yell at you about?"

He really does want it spelled out. Leo suddenly realizes that there won't be any yelling because this is his punishment: to admit everything he's done, to speak all his sins for his dad's ears. Lay it all out in his own tongue and show that he understands, really and truly, the depths of his screwups.

Oh, he understands. He understands it so well he may choke on the words.

"...For losing the key," he says finally, and it stings on its way out. He hasn't talked about it since it happened; every time he tries to say anything to the others, they shush him, saying, "It's okay, Leo, everything is fine now."

It's not okay, and everything isn't fine, and this is when he finally hears about it.

Finally, an identifiable emotion on Splinter's face: horror, dawning clear and present. And Leo doesn't understand that, because doesn't Splinter know he lost the key? He was there for that conversation, wasn't he? Leo's memories of that day have grown a little hazy between the drugs and the recovery and the fact that thinking about it for too long makes him go fuzzy around the edges, but he's pretty sure he remembers Splinter being there. He flicked popcorn at Leo's head. He probably should have done more than that; maybe then Leo wouldn't have made such a mess of things.

Splinter doesn't say anything right away, just stares at Leo with that horrified expression, and the silence is so scary that Leo starts filling it without even thinking.

"I was kidding about the whole... not yelling at me thing. I know I deserve it. I mean, I was fooling around, doing what you and Raph told me not to do, and I doomed the whole world doing it! Some leader I am, right? And I know I'm not exactly your favorite son to begin with, and that's fair, because I keep letting you down, but this is definitely my worst screwup to date, and you yell at me when I don't close the fridge door all the way or throw balls around the TV room so why wouldn't you yell at me for destroying the planet, right...?"

His voice peters out at the end, too hoarse to continue. That's the most words he's strung together over the last week, and for the first time he's glad for his injuries, for stopping him from spewing any more embarrassing word vomit just to fill the air.

Splinter is still looking at him with that same horrified expression. If anything, he just looks more upset, which means that Leo at least accomplished his goal.

Leo's waiting for the yelling to start, but when Splinter finally says something, it's, "You think I have a favorite son?" throwing Leo for a loop once again.

"Uh, yeah?" he says, because that's all there is to say. He's always assumed it's Donnie - the "funny one", the one who fixes Splinter's TV when it's broken, and the only one of them likely to get a real job and move out of the house. But even if it's not Donnie, it's gotta be Mikey, or Raph. His brothers are amazing and talented, and all Leo has ever been good at is winning the Lair Games.

Splinter closes his eyes a moment, and when he opens them his face moves back to a more neutral expression. "I do not have a favorite son," he says, firm and serious. "I love all of you just the same."

Leo thinks that can't be true - if it is, he feels bad for the other guys. But he doesn't think he can just say that, so he says, "Yeah, Dad, of course," instead.

Splinter looks a bit crestfallen. "You don't believe me?" he asks, and shoot. Leo has no idea how to respond to that.

"...I know you love us," is what he says. And that's true, it is! He just doesn't know how his dad could like him as much as the others.

Splinter's expression turns sad. He reaches out and lays a furry hand on Leo's arm, careful of his bandages and all the many wires he's hooked to. "You think you doomed the world?"

"I lost the key," Leo repeats. "It was all my fault. It's why I had to..." His voice fumbles over the words, and he revises. "It's why it had to be me."

Splinter's mouth twists. He climbs out of the chair and onto the mattress, careful not to jostle Leo as he settles down on his knees.

"Blue," he says softly, gently palming Leo's face this time. "None of this was your fault."

Leo's stomach twists again. He thought he was being punished, but somehow this is worse.

"Yes it was," he argues. "I lost the key," for the third time, "and... and I ignored the order to retreat, and got Raph captured, and and and, I ignored the guys and tried to force our way into Metro Tower, and it was me who told Donnie to try to fly that stupid ship, and because of me Mikey had to-"

"Leonardo," says Splinter, sharp, and Leo goes silent. His dad looks devastated, but he keeps his hand on Leo's cheek, brushing with his thumb, and for the first time Leo realizes his skin is wet. Splinter sighs heavily, his entire frame seeming to droop with the weight of it.

"Leonardo," he repeats, softly this time. "You did not doom the world."

"But-"

A furry finger on his lip quiets him.

"You did not doom the world," Splinter repeats, once again firm and serious. "You did not take the theft of the key seriously, because you did not know what it was, the threat it represented. But it was the Foot Clan who chose to use that key, fully knowing what evil it would unleash. That is not on you, my son. The responsibility falls squarely on them."

Leo doesn't know how much he can believe that - isn't it their job to stop the Foot Clan? But Splinter looks so sure as he says it, and his hand is still tender on Leo's cheek, and for the first time a little bit of doubt seeps into Leo's heart, telling him that maybe, just maybe, this wasn't all his fault after all.

But still...

"Even if that's true," he says, with heavy emphasis on the if, "everything I did after that-"

"You are young," his dad interrupts. "You are inexperienced. You are learning. And the amount of growth you showed us all, even over just that one day... You shined as brightly as I know you can."

Again, Leo's stomach does a twist - but it's a happier one, this time. Splinter's voice is sincere, leaving no room for doubt, and Leo can almost, almost believe that this is true, that his dad has believed in him from the very beginning. Has seen something in him, whatever it was that led him to make Leo the leader, that lead to him putting trust in Leo.

He just wishes he felt like he'd done more to earn it.

"You did not doom the world," says his dad again. "You saved it. But, it never should have been like that to begin with. You should never have been facing down such a fierce foe so young, especially as alone as you boys were. And you-"

His voice becomes choked up, and Leo's heart lurches.

"You... sacrificed yourself to save us all. I... I am your father, and I... could not protect you."

He's crying. His dad is crying, and Leo feels panic, reaching out to try and stop this.

"Dad-"

"No." Splinter holds up a hand, giving his head a hard shake. "All I ever wanted for you boys was to save you from the sacrifices asked of our family. And yet I could not - and for that, you paid dearly. You almost paid the ultimate price, and we almost lost you forever."

A thick knot forms in Leo's throat, and he can barely get out, "I'm okay, Dad, I'm here."

"Yes you are." Splinter squeezes his shoulder desperately. "You are here. You are safe. But that doesn't change that it should not have been you to begin with."

Leo watches in dawning horror as Splinter steps back, then kneels over on the mattress.

"This is why I came in here, Blue. Not to yell at you. To apologize."

He presses his forehead against the sheets.

"I am so sorry that I could not protect you."

He's crying. So is Leo, openly now. He reaches out for his dad, fumbling for his shoulders and urging him to straighten up.

"No, Dad... This wasn't your fault!"

"But-"

"No! It was just... it was just a really, really shitty thing that happened, okay? It was the Foot Clan, and the Krang, but it wasn't- it wasn't..."

Splinter raises his face and looks at him, and suddenly the words he's been trying to get Leo to believe for the last several minutes barrel into him and Leo crumbles.

"...I didn't have to do it," he says.

"No." Splinter gets up, coming closer. "You had nothing to atone for. You did it because you are brave, and you are kind, but this was never yours to fix."

Leo sucks in one harsh breath, then another, and then he's sobbing harder than he ever has in his life, and his dad hugs him tight, his arms warm and his fur soft where Leo buries his face in his shoulder.

All the feelings he's pushed aside - the ones he didn't think he had the right to feel, because he'd had to do it, he had to make up for his mistakes - bubble over, gripping him with grief and despair but also relief, that he's still here to cry and be hugged by his dad.

"I was so scared."

"I know."

"I thought I wouldn't see you guys again."

"I know. We thought we had lost you, too."

"I just... I didn't know what else to do... I couldn't let him... I couldn't..."

"Shhh, it's alright. It's over now. We're all safe."

Leo hugs his dad back, as tightly as he can with his injuries, and sobs and sobs until he's all out of tears. And all along, his dad tells him he is safe, he is good, and he is loved.

Later, Leo feels even better than he had before.

#dandy fanfiction #rottmnt #rise leo #rise splinter #this is probably the most self-indulgent thing I've written in like #A WHILE #I hope this is coherent at least lol #as usual I have no idea how to end anything #god this is sappy but whatever #I AM CRINGE BUT I AM FREE

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lumiink · 1 year

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posting fanart for my own fanfics on main (again lol), don’t even worry about it. sometimes you gotta visualise something while you write.

#tgcf #xie lian #tgcf au #tgcf fanart #in the loosest sense #fanart #im giving up on all pretense of being chill #ill probably do it again #cringe is dead #long live whatever the heck it is im doing

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baylardian-1 · 9 months

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lil horse deity siblings!

Celestia and Luna and their brother who was conceptualized to be named Cosmos but imma call him Atlas :3 While his sisters control the sun and the moon respectively, Atlas controls the planet in its constant rotation. Unlike Luna and Celestia, Atlas prefers to remain out of the spotlight and doesnt care for politics, so he wanders the world pretty aimlessly. he's a daydreamer and while he plays crucially important role, he's ambitionless and carefree.

#he's mad cringe and embarrasses Celestia and Luna whenever he visits #lil hippie dippie boy peace and love!!!#My Art #My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic #MLP: FiM #Celestia #Luna #Atlas #Cosmos #Alicorn #his horn is weird the rotation of the planet spins with the lil floaty ball in his horn #hes probably the most gifted ironically haha #very Whatever about his magic capabilities

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toasterfired · 1 month

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Made an mlb au when i haven't even watched the full show and only certain episodes and some of the specials . very non-sensical with many loosely connected thoughts rn

Text for marinette:

Crochets/Sews/Thrifts

Rather quiet/shy until interest is mentioned

So clumsy/unlucky that she over prepares/plans everything

when plans fail, stressed out and becomes more controlling as a result

insecure over relationships with people

Text for felix:

likes reading sappy romance novels (wants to be suave biker boy so bad but it's just his type not his inspo)

Chat noir is free reign weird girl era

thing that bites

super curious as chat noir

too curious.

#my art #miraculous ladybug #miraculous fanart #miraculous au #rewrite au #marinette dupain cheng #felix agreste #felinette #it still counts if its slowburn and for 99% of the time theyre just like wow this is my bestest friend <3 #this is me accepting my cringe doing whatever i want era and i think. their silly weird girl potential is so high #very inspired by other ppl's felix interpretations and a lil mix of felix pv and canon #things will probably change as i actually watch the show maybe (thumbs up)

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feelo-fick · 7 months

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i had a vision last night. smile. ^_^

#its taking me so much effort not to cringe at myself #SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!!!!#I DRAW WHAT I WANT!!!! FUCK YOU VOICE IN MY HEAD!!!!#anyways.#i should probably have a wip tag but whatever #ANYWAYS ANYWAYS.#prismo the wishmaster #scarab is there too but hes tiny im not counting it #prohibitedwish #... yeah #“i dont go here” *has billions of fanart ideas*

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angelbitezzz · 6 days

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Recently read Tilikum by Llama_Goddess on Ao3 (check out the link it's so good) and it gave me some interesting brainrot ideas

Fic under the cut

A day dawned like any other for Sans. Get out of bed, work various odd jobs, slack off at said odd jobs, and get home to sleep some more.

Today was a new gig—Janitor work at the local aquarium. It was good, easy work. He'd been all sorts of things in his time both underground and now on the surface, so he was largely left to his own devices practically since the first day.

Some kid spilled one of those themed ice creams on the floor in front of one of the siren tanks. Big attractions, those guys. Not quite human, too physical to be a monster, they sort of floated in this odd in-between state of natural existence. Word was that the song of one would easily lead you to your drowning death. It was a good thing that glass was thick and soundproof, otherwise any of the ones held captive would likely jump at the chance.

Sans mopped away at the spill slowly, dragging out the task. The place was closing for the night soon, he certainly didn't want to be redirected to something else when he had such an easy job right here. A whistle leaked from between his teeth, some song he'd heard on TV earlier in the day.

The room was empty now. With the evening settling in and closing time within the hour, no one had come by to this one since he'd gotten here. Probably since this specific siren didn't seem a fan of performance, or being seen. You were lucky to get a glimpse of it if it was feeling curious on a given day, or so Sans had heard.

He wrung the mop in the bucket and set about just mopping the entire room, still whistling away. But a chill ran up his spine, halting his movements.

The unmistakable, burning feeling of being watched.

He turned his head slow, pupils sliding up along the glass he stood next to until they connected with a bright purple gaze that seemed to peer right through him.

The siren.

It—She? She floated right there, hand pressed against the glass. Her pupils were blown wide open, though they dilated just a little when their eyes met properly. There was something curious about the look on her face, so human if not for the subtle shine of fine scales along her brown skin. Dark hair drifted around her face, some kind of kelp braided into it at certain spots, that same stuff even braided and tied together to make up the cloth she was wearing around her chest. Did sirens care for modesty? He didn't know. Her lower half was that of a fish, something tropical he hadn't bothered to learn the name of. Powerful muscles twitched the end of the tail, keeping her afloat in the same position with ease.

He wasn't sure when he'd stopped breathing. It seemed like time itself had stopped when he realized he was being watched. Was this typical of sirens? Did the gaze of one paralyze as much as the song?

No, that couldn't be the case. Otherwise they wouldn't bother with displaying them at all.

When he didn't react behind meeting her gaze, she seemed to relax just a little. Her eyes slid along his form, taking in the details of his Janitor's uniform and the bones that were visible.

"huh. you're, uh, curious, i guess?"

Sans wasn't sure why he was talking, it wasn't as if she could hear him. But the way his eternal grin moved with the speech seemed to fascinate her. She lowered herself to be more at eye level, both hands against the glass. He slowly put his mop back in the bucket and turned towards her, tugging at his gloves to pull them tighter before stepping closer. The siren didn't move, only followed every movement with that same burning gaze.

"heya." Sans gave a little wave, the way the kid had taught him.

The siren waved back, copying his movement exactly. Then she did something new—she pointed at him. He pointed at himself.

"me?"

She nodded and did something else, crossed her hands over her chest in fists, only the index and middle finger half extended. She bumped them together at the wrist, tapping the fingers to her shoulders and sliding them down to a point at her mid-chest. When he responded with a blank stare, she repeated it. His head tilted.

"now what does that mean...?"

The siren only did it once more before she seemed to give up. She made a recognizable motion this time, both hands in fists together and turning down as if snapping something. He almost frowned.

"that a threat?"

Her face broke out into a wide smile, revealing teeth sharper than he expected before she was laughing on the other side of the glass. There was no other explanation for what she was doing, she was laughing, entirely too amused by his reaction as her shoulders shook. His grin widened a little at that. Well, at least someone here was having fun?

The siren seemed to recover from her fit and gazed at him once more, pupils dilated again. Then they flickered up—an alarmed look flashed over her features before she was suddenly gone. There was a flick of her great tail and then she had twisted away into the kelp and seaweed populating her tank, only the waves of the greenery giving away how fast she'd moved. Sans glanced backwards, feeling oddly like a kid caught doing something he wasn't supposed to when he met the fascinated stare of a fellow janitor.

"hey, paul. uh. somefin the matter?"

"....I didn't see a damn thing."

The older human just turned and walked out, grumbling something about working here for too damn long just for a newbie to get the attention of one of the shyer sirens. Whatever that was about.

When the intercom crackled to life to announce the night's closing, Sans cast one last glance at the tank as he retrieved his bucket and mop.

The siren was nowhere to be seen.

#art #my art #digital art #doodle #undertale #sans #sans undertale #undertale au #siren au #im not tagging this under the fanfic inspiration's name only cuz thats the name of an actual real life orca whale #ANYWAYS HI i got a little inspired #cringe fail janitor catches the attention of unknowable sea beast #whatever will he do #(probably some free willy type shit actually)#fanfic #self insert #selfship #i based her tail off the dorado fish but its not super obvious unless i draw a colored ref lol #this was mostly for shits and giggles

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cerise-on-top · 19 days

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heyhey!! just wanted to say your works are amazing and i love them so so so SO much aagghhh!!

now onto the request— what if,, what if reader knew a ton of languages like nikolai does, and they call their s/o pet names in those languages. an example would be,, maybe if they knew french they would say 'mon chéri' or perhaps they picked up romanian at some point and would call them 'dragă'

the characters i have in mind are price, nik, alejandro, & rudy, if that's okay !! (´▽`)

sorry for the super long ask, lol :')

Hey there! Thank you, that makes me really happy to hear :D And don't worry about sending longer asks, I really don't mind ^^ Also, that request is really cute! I love reader speaking several languages and being a sweetheart in all of them :D

Price, Alejandro, Rodolfo and Nikolai with an S/O who Knows Many Languages

Price: I think he knows quite a few languages himself, being a captain in the SAS and all. Not nearly as many as Nikolai, but he probably knows a good three to four languages, so he likely wouldn’t be entirely clueless when you call him something along the lines of mon petit chou fleur. While he won’t understand every term of endearment you call him, it does warm his heart to hear you speak a language he doesn’t know. It flows off your tongue very nicely and he just loves listening to you. Depending on what kind of language it may be, even the profanities sound nice. Although whenever you want to get his attention, just to call him something in a language he doesn’t understand, he sort of expects it to be some cute pet name. Will always smile at you, even if you were to call him your albernes kleines Kaninchen. Retorts with a pet name in one of the languages he speaks. Sometimes he does feel the urge to learn a new language, just for you. Or maybe you could learn a new language together? Practice with each other and just have a good time overall? He might bring up the idea at some point.

Alejandro: Like Price, he probably knows a few languages himself. More than the average person, but not nearly as many as Nikolai. So probably three to four as well. However, because he knows Spanish there’s a good chance he can derive most words in a Romance language. Call him something along the lines of giliw and he’ll always retort with some embarrassing pet name in Spanish. Yes, he knows several languages himself, but that doesn’t mean he won’t almost always revert to Spanish anyway. Pretends that you’re using your languages against him and calls you a traitor. And, as is the rule in your household when you’ve betrayed him, you will be held accountable. Lots of chasing through the house. Will “interrogate” you to get you to tell him what you said. Call him a term of endearment in Spanish and you won’t ever hear the end of it. No matter how many times he hears you call him guapo, he always gets that goofy grin on his face. Might research embarrassing terms of endearment to use on you in any other language. And yes, his goal is to find a language you don’t speak. Once he’s found one? He’s not gonna let you live it down. He’s bested you, and that’s all he wanted.

Rodolfo: You’d actually have to call him by his name if you want his reaction since he usually just tends to block out people speaking a language he doesn’t know. Why bother trying to understand someone like that? It’s not like he’ll learn the language overnight anyway. Rodolfo knows about three languages, so not as many as Alejandro. But he knows English and Spanish, which means he can communicate in most places anyway. He thinks he knows enough languages since learning one takes roughly an eternity and he doesn’t have the time for that anyway. Call him Cục vàng and he’ll just look at you as though you’ve grown a second head. You’d have to tell him what it means and then he’ll smile. While he will always appreciate a good Hartlam, he might look at you confused until you tell him you love him. Might not always retort with a pet name of his own, but will mix it up among the languages he does know since he doesn’t wanna seem too stupid next to you. Will also sometimes look up new terms of endearment in languages he doesn’t know so he can surprise you, but might get a bit shy since he might botch the pronunciation a bit. But he tries, and that’s all that matters.

Nikolai: He canonically knows eight languages, so there’s a good chance he knows what you’re saying. Even when you’re saying something in a language he might not entirely know, he might be able to derive the word from a language he does know. Although he may love any pet name you give him, he especially loves any Russian ones since he’s very attached to his country and his native tongue. Goes absolutely wild whenever you call him radnoy. There’s just something so sweet about you calling him something nice in Russian, doesn’t even matter if you botch the pronunciation. Will always give you a hug and a kiss to your forehead since he will always be reminded of how much he loves you. But even a simple min søde skat will get him to smile, even if he has no idea what it means this time. Because of you he might be inspired to pick up some new languages along the way, maybe even ones you don’t know so you can get the same treatment he does with you. Whenever you speak a language he doesn’t know he gets heart eyes for you. You’re just so gorgeous, you’re just so very smart. However, at some point he will just start speaking Russian to you, even if you don’t know the language. He won’t say anything mean, he’ll just tell you how precious you are and how much he loves you.

#cod #cod x reader #john price #john price x reader #price x reader #alejandro vargas #alejandro vargas x reader #rodolfo parra #rodolfo parra x reader #cod nikolai #nikolai x reader #I wish I knew more languages than I actually do #I'd love to be at least trilingual. I suppose one of these days I shall learn another language #I've already started the same one twice but I never got too far since something always came inbetween #Oh what I'd give to be lovey dovey with someone in three languages #I wish I still knew Italian. I learned it in school but I never needed it again #I also had Latin. If you give me a dictionary and some time I could probably translate some sentences still #or maybe not. it's been three years now #but I suppose being cringe in German and my own dialect is just fine #I've always loved speaking my dialect to my best friend who only knows English #I've also always loved texting him in said dialect #“Your impossible to Google translate German” I love that guy so much he's so silly #I will never cease my silly dialect!! that's why there will be plenty of König to go around :-) I don't care. he speaks my dialect #gonna hit y'all with a good old Servas griaß di #König is my little Barbie doll: I make him do whatever I want #sorry this derailed into König again. I just love shaking and rotating him violently in my head ^^

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puppyeared · 4 months

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i feel like. theres designing a character with certain themes and motifs in mind, and then theres making a gijinka for the water bottle on my nightstand

#me when im the only person on the bus wearing a mask: i should make a furry plaguesona #its hard to explain bc. most of the time i try NOT to give my characters a 'strong' theme like making their whole design around #one thing like apples or even broad stuff like baking or cottagecore.. idk if its partly for flexibility or because i cant imagine them #making it their whole personality. not bc i find it cringe or overblown but more like ive learned to associate design with character depth #i had a cutesy uwu persona for most of highschool because i thought it would make me more. likeable? easy to remember? since #memorable character designs are easy to recognize. and one way of doing that is simplifying it with a theme or symbol so you form an #association. but since im a real person its exhausting keeping up that appearance all the time and denying myself things when they dont #fit my 'aesthetic' or 'theme.' i think ive grown past that bc i just collect stuff because i think it looks cool and dont let myself dwell #on how it might 'fit' with my image. but i cant help feeling bad doing it to my own characters bc it feels like im making them too one #dimensional. despite knowing that theyre not real and design alone doesnt reflect depth i cant help feeling like its wrong #despite that i love seeing motifs because it feels like it reflects the characters soul and paradoxically gives them depth. it makes them #interesting to look at too and honestly its pretty fun combining things that fall under a similar category when designing #i struggle find a balance between those two things #actually this reminds me of noelles christmas theme.. i dont remember her saying anything abt liking christmas despite a lot of #her design and character tying back to it. it makes me wonder if she would have feelings about that or doesnt think abt it too hard #or if its like a matching family shirts situation and shes just going along with it??#maybe i should just do whatever i want with my character designs since theyre not real and im thinking abt it too hard #although. this probably has something to do with deep seated identity issues huh #yapping #oc talk #oc

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carcinized · 2 years

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going to be 100% honest. ppl who hate literally every single person who watches or makes minecraft content are the biggest fucking red flags. like if u hate dream or something? valid. wanna harp on tommy? i mean like fine. that’s ur opinion yaknow? but when they go No. ALL minecraft youtube and minecraft is Bad. every single 7 year old who plays it is racist and Bad. like okay mx no critical thinking skills i hate children . youre probably an asshole

#if u think it’s cringe fine if u think it’s whatever fine. but when they go ITS AXTIVELY BAD . no??#not much of a reason to post this #just kind of annoyed. i havent even seen anything but im sure it’s out there abt techno rn #though out of every mcyter he was the most loved by the outside community. bc he was just fucking awesome like that #u couldn’t hate the guy. he was amazing #but im sure there’s someone out there being a fucking asshole bc they don’t know #and i just. big red flag if ur celebrating a fucking DEATH not knowing shit about them or their life #im General if ur an asshole about shit u don’t know about ur. probably an asshole. like.#idk #tobin talks

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shimmershy · 5 months

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What does kin mean?

The meaning can tend to vary depending on who you ask, but it generally means (TLDR:) identifying with a character in some way. Although it originated from the term "otherkin", which means identifying with an animal/another species, the way it's typically used in this context refers to "fictionkin".

Many people use it to describe simply relating strongly to a character and don't really see themselves as the character in any way, but it was originally used to describe identifying as the character in a spiritual/psychological way. To clarify, it doesn't mean that you think you literally are that character right now, in a physical way etc. It's more of an identity thing. (I could go more in-depth on what that means, but I'm going to assume that's more information than you're looking for.)

It's kind of a Tumblr/internet culture thing, but I'm not very involved in the community or anything because it's more of a personal thing for me specifically, so. I really don't feel like the best person to ask if you have any more questions. I apologize if that's too much information for such a simple question; I guess it's a bit complicated to explain.

#ask #anon #anonymous #i feel embarrassed dumping all this information here out of the blue like i know more than i should.#especially with this being the kind of thing a large number of people find weird or 'cringe'. but whatever.#like i said it's more of a personal thing to me so i don't ever post about it and probably won't in the future unless asked about it.#which i am not opposed to because AS YOU CAN SEE I really like going on and on about things.#it's taking all my restraint not to type up every single piece of irrelevant information i have on this topic right now.#please please please don't send me mean asks or anything related to discourse or whatever after this. I'm just a little guy.

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thebronzeermine · 7 months

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This is also old but like

I love this book an unnatural amount

#the secret history #charles macaulay #tsh #tsh donna tartt #tsh fanart #it should probably be henry but whatever #enjoy anyway #henry winter #donna tartt #I am hiding this in the tags #I didn’t know how to write Greek very well #maybe I’m cringe #yes this is a lot of tags #treating tumblr like ao3 right now #homoerotism

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tsunael · 3 months

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“… no wounds, nor the presence of any poisonous substances.”

Tsuna stood in the threshold of the sick bay, twirling the rounded gem hanging from her horn’s tip. It was Kan-E-Senna who bid her welcome when she arrived, looking thoroughly out-of-place in Twelveswood furs when surrounded by nothing but heat and sandstone.

The room smelled of death and disinfectant. The siege of Ala Mhigo had left it wanting in supplies, but certainly not in bodies. Tsuna’s expression merely darkened.

“Is he well?” She asked, foregoing the pleasantries of seeing a familiar face.

If Kan-E-Senna was slighted by the lack of manners, she did not show it, instead she merely shook her head on the negative, softly inclining to the prone subject of their musings. “His condition has yet to change,” she said, trailing off as if hesitant to unveil the situation, “... Though, I do not expect it to.”

Meaning: he hadn’t awoken since the collapse. The chirurgeon had advised against moving him so soon until they find the cause, despite the Scion's fervent wish to see him back to The Rising Stones for succor.

Tsuna hinged not on that of which she already knew, but the fact that it would continue.

“Why!?" she barked. "If you know something– tell me! Please.” There would have been a cutting edge to Tsuna’s voice had she not warbled as she said it. The padjal did not deserve her misplaced ire, but she was the only wall she could scream her uncertainty to. “All of these alchemists and chirurgeons– all the testing– what were they all for?”

Kan-e-Senna sighed, soft. “I myself examined Thancred. Reach out as I may, I could not sense in him the spark of life that is his soul.”

Tsuna brought her hands to her chest, curling them in just to hold something as she stared, suddenly breathless. Who could have possibly done such a feat? No mortal of their era held such power-- to pluck a soul from an unwilling body should not be possible. Her mind swam with questions and caveats– what came from her lips instead was denial. “That can't be true.”

The Seedseer’s patience was vast, and her empathy, boundless. “You have inherited A-Towa-Cant’s will. I bid you to seek him out yourself, though I fear you will arrive at the selfsame conclusion.”

Tsuna wanted to protest, to argue she held no such proclivity to aethersight, nor academic knowledge of aetherology, but the moment her thoughts drifted to the padjali man who first gave her the pearlescent stone did it begin to warm her chest. Like a heart’s beat it pulsed strong and true to remind her of what she was.

It moved her to act. She crept to Thancred’s side where he slept, and lowered herself to sit upon the edge of the mattress. The spell began as soon as she lifted her left palm but ilms from his chest. There was a small apology for the intrusion of what she was about to do, and then a familiar warmth began to ripple through her. It reverberated up her spine and spread to her hand, and then she began her search for him.

Aether moved from the earth beneath her boots, out through the tips of her fingers, slowly probing for a sign.

His lungs yet moved with breath, but they filled so shallow that it should not have been enough to sustain him. She closed her eyes to the feeling welling within her, concentrating harder as she rounded his heart. It, too, beat with the rhythm of life, and carried out its biological function of moving the humours as it was designed, but that was all. There was something missing. The spark that Kan-E-Senna spoke of was simply not there.

Before her was a body that was moving on its automated course, nothing more and nothing less. It was a vessel; a husk of a man.

Tsuna’s meditation ended, and she withdrew her aether with a pained gasp. She felt her eyes prick with the emotion settling thickly in her throat. It was just as Kan-E-Senna said, and she hadn't needed a crystal to tell her as much.

“I’m sorry, Seedseer,” Tsuna finally whispered. “I should not have doubted you. Thank you for looking after him.” Tsuna looked first to his folded hands, and then to the padjal at the foot of his sickbed who smiled softly in equal parts brief and rueful.

“I should have come sooner. I’ve been trying to find the time with everything happening when I should have been making time for you-– and for him-–”

“Tsuna, please.” Kan-E-Senna shocked her first with her own name, and then talked her down with all the gentleness reserved for a fretting child. “Although he is stable there is naught else you can do for him now but to carry on. There is still more I need to speak on regarding the nature of his condition, but I believe it is something every Scion that was affected should hear…”

Why the lot of them doubled over with pain, why they heard a voice, and why it was only Thancred succumbed to the call.

The padjal excused herself to make contact with the others, and Tsuna was left with such information and her morbid company. A part of her was glad for it, for the tears and hand wringing were able to begin in earnest without fear of coming apart in front of her esteemed mentor. She took a shivery little breath, cursing the Gods as hot tears escaped her eyes, and carved a wet path down her face. They wetted her lap, and she could do naught to stem the flow.

As much as she hated him, he did not deserve this fate. After all he had done, and more, Nymeia had no reason to spin his thread in such a way. Moreover, the subject he asked to broach with her before the Alliance’s meeting would be left unknown. What had he wanted to speak to her about? She ruminated over a chewed lip. Had he known something?

Thancred looked as if he were asleep– and for all accounts– he was. He was asleep, but he did not dream. Out of three long years of knowing, it was the first time she had seen him vulnerable. It was the first time she was able to look upon him in the way she was meant to.

He looked younger, she noted, when bereft of his customary scowl. The lines on his face had softened, and for once he looked to be his age of thirty and four.

Softly, she sniffled, and reached out her hand again, hesitating on the last ilm. Her fingers curled and retracted in finding the motion improper, for she was not searching for his spark this time but instead to sate her own wonder. Gently, respectfully, she brushed the soft hair from his face, moving to cup the hard line of his jaw.

His skin was as ice– and it was as she feared. She entertained a living corpse. Tsuna took her hand away, burned for her curiosity, to finally leave him to his peace.

She was going to find the thing that was doing this

and she was going to break its heart.

#lmao hi #ooooh my cringe be upon you #he looks like a wet cat and I don't think these came out very well but whatever #I've been thinkin a lot about kan e senna lately because I love her and I remembered she was the one that found out what was wrong #personally I think tsuna should backhand mr. exarch shrimply because She Would Do That and also It Would Be Very Funny #and he'd probably cry about it afterwards-- oh :(#my writing (derogatory)#gpose #ffxiv spoilers

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