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bg-brainrot · 5 months

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Day four of Astarion x Rogue!Tav winter fluff for the BG3 Winter Holiday Challenge!

Prompt: Mulled Wine

Featuring: Astarion x Rogue!Tav

Series: Fits into Love at First Knife, AO3 link here

Premise: Astarion walks into you making mulled wine. He doesn’t understand why you must ruin wine for the sake of winter. When he refuses to see your point, you find another way to show him.

Tags: POV Second Person, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Fluff, Holidays, Alcohol, Kisses, post-cannon

Word count: ~1k

“Darling, what are you doing to that red wine?” Astarion walks into the kitchen, turning his nose up at the concoction you’re stirring.

“I’m making mulled wine,” you say, turning to smile at him. “What do you think I’m doing?”

He gives a single sniff and turns his lips down into a grimace. “My nose tells me that you’re ruining a perfectly good bottle of wine.” You drop the smile and give him a glare.

“What do you mean ruining?” you ask, incredulous. “I’m following the instructions that Gale gave me to the letter. Though I guess I am skipping over some of his longer-winded tangents…” A quick glance over at the notes on the counter confirms your accuracy.

The vampire shakes his head at you and walks up to the stove where you’re still stirring. “I have no doubt that you’re executing it perfectly, dear. You’ve made poisons that require more finesse than this. However, adding all of those spices– and oranges? What was wrong with the original wine?”

“Nothing was wrong. I just wanted to make something seasonal,” you say, feeling the need to defend your creation. You look down at your mixture, at the various pieces of seasonal flavors swirling as you stir, and you’re almost positive that it will taste perfect on a cold winter’s day like today.

“Why not a nice buttered rum? I don’t mind if you torment the rum.”

You roll your eyes at this, knowing full well now that this line of questioning was meant to be entertainment for Astarion. He was likely just bored and wondering why you were spending so much time in the kitchen. “I don’t want buttered rum. Why are you so against mulled wine– when was the last time you even had mulled wine?”

A moment of silence passes between you, and you turn away from your pot to look at him, suddenly fearful that you accidentally struck a nerve you hadn’t meant to. However, he just looks pensive, a single finger tapping his chin thoughtfully. When his answer finally comes, he just says it with a sense of awe, “You know, it’s likely been over 200 years.”

“Oh,” you respond, pursing your lips. You gesture at him with the spoon you’re holding. “Maybe it would be like a brand new experience?”

“It could be,” he responds, and while there’s some hesitation to his tone, he does sound more amenable to the idea now. He wafts the steam from the pot toward his nose, as if a better sniff might change his mind. Instead your lover physically recoils and places a hand over his face. “Gods, what are these spices?”

“Let’s see... cardamom, cinnamon, and star anise,” you recite, looking back at the paper Gale wrote you.

Your lover makes a face at you before he chokes out, “Star anise? That’s where the pungent smell is coming from. Darling, as the resident connoisseur of scents, you should have asked me for your spices.”

“Ah,” you breathe out, understanding dawning on you. You point the spoon at him excitedly, “I got it!”

“Got what?” he says, staring at you blankly. You can feel his assurance in your ability to make mulled wine deteriorating by the second. No matter– you know how to fix this.

Scooping up a bit of your brew in the stirring spoon, you blow gently on it to cool it down and hold it out to him. “Try it.”

“Oh no,” he immediately says, taking a step back. “I refuse to be your test subject.”

“Fine then, let me try it first.” You sip the mulled wine out of the spoon, savoring it on your tongue. It’s sweet, it’s spiced, and it tastes just like cozying up to a fireplace– your face breaks into a wide grin at its rich flavor. As you suspected, the star anise only gives it a subtle note, none of that strong licorice smell it typically has. Astarion wouldn't remember that after hundreds of years away from drinks like this. “Mmm, it’s perfect.”

Astarion looks at you for a second, as if waiting for your composure to crack, your body to convulse with disgust. When nothing happens, he only asks, “What does it taste like?”

“Would you like to try it?” You’re beaming at him now, absolutely certain that this will change his mind about mulled wine.

He still seems cautious, probably wondering if this is all some ruse devised by you and Gale.

Sensing his worries, you scoop another spoonful for yourself, take a drink, and close the distance between you. “Mmm mm,” you say to him, behind closed lips.

“What?” the man asks, raising a single eyebrow at you.

“Mmm mm!” you repeat, pointing to your lips, which you’re emphatically puckering at him.

Your request clicks in his head a moment later and he can’t help the laugh that escapes him. “My love, have I told you that you’re utterly ridiculous lately? Because I feel like you’re overdue.” Nevertheless, he takes a step forward, placing his hands on your waist and pulling you close as he meets your pursed lips with his.

The kiss, much like the mulled wine, starts off sweet but quickly comes with a kick of spice. Astarion’s tongue traces your bottom lip and you open your mouth to allow him in. One of his hands finds your face and angles it to deepen the kiss, locking his mouth with yours to try to keep the wine from spilling.

You feel a few trickles of liquid fall down your chin, but you find that you don’t mind– in fact, the only thing on your mind is the way Astarion’s tongue is relishing the mulled wine. The vampire gives a low hum as his tongue circles yours, tasting the liquid fully. He has yet to run away in revulsion, so you’re pretty sure he likes it. Or at the very least likes kissing you.

When he finally pulls away, a bit short of breath, his lips stained with wine, he gives you a smirk. “I think I finally understand the appeal of mulled wine.”

“So does that mean you liked it?” you ask him, equally breathless.

Astarion swipes his thumb down your chin, wiping away the wine that dribbled down before bringing it to mouth. He gives you a dark, lidded look as he licks it off and gives a rumbling hmm. “I’m not sure yet. You’ll have to give me another taste.”

It’s slow going, but you enthusiastically ensure that your lover gets his fill of mulled wine.

#astarion #astarion x tav #fanfic #rogue + rogue #astarion x reader #bg3holidayfluffle23

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bengiyo · 2 months

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Cherry Magic TH Ep 12 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

Last week, Achi went to a different city to help set up a new office. There, he had to work on his social skills to bond with the new staff, and succeeded through the power of his good nature and soccer. Karan and Achi stayed in touch the entire time they were separated, and Karan visited twice. Achi hesitated about coming out, but was rewarded when the new team was completely supportive and only asked about his partner so they knew who to contact. Meanwhile, Jinta talked Min into not giving up on an audition, and Min said he loved Jinta. We left on Achi losing his powers in a very satisfying bed scene and afterglow.

Achi really lucked out with Karan.

I'm so proud of Achi for managing to complete this project and earn the confidence of this team.

Ah yes, a finale. It's time to meet the parents.

Boss, don't remind me of the no dating rule.

Pai is such a supportive friend.

NOT THE BALLOONS SOUNDING LIKE GUNSHOTS

Damn, Mom, why you gotta dunk on your own son??

It's fine, she's definitely cool with it. She already put them to work and doled out advice.

I love Karan so much. This man recorded Achi expressing love in the Northern dialect, and Achi agreed so he wouldn't have to say it often.

It couldn't all be cherries on tablecloths. Looks like Karan is maintaining continuity with his Japanese counterpart's family.

Achi's mom hugging Karan is something that can be so personal.

I will never get over Jinta wearing sunglasses over his glasses.

Yes, let's model good fan behavior with the artist. They only jumped because they thought Jinta was trying to kidnap Min and then calmed down. They're even fans of Jinta's book!

Absolutely love that Karan is not withholding his feelings from Achi about how his mom might be homophobic.

AN 8 HOUR DRIVE? Are we going to Dallas???

Give that man his reward, Achi!

Welp, I knew it was too simple with Karan's mom. She very smoothly shoved them into a closet.

I'm glad it's the sister having this conversation with the mom.

She said her piece and counted to three!!!

Karan being a little brother makes so much sense every time.

Look at Tay Tawan acting. I know the mom and dad turning around so quickly is a bit unrealistic, but I like the aspirational nature of it. It could be this easy if we tried hard enough for each other.

Of course he proposed. I love this man.

You know he's had that ring ready for a while!

COME THROUGH, ACHI!! MUTUAL GAY PROPOSAL!!!

Wow, that was everything I hoped for and more out of the family stuff.

Whoa, did Jinta reveal he popped that cherry?

Oh, it's also the symbol for Min's group.

Aww, Rock has a fan!!

Pai is definitely shipping Rock and the fan.

Save the date!!

Well well well, Cherry Magic Thailand. Good job being explicit about marriage equality.

Okay, I like the reference to the pens.

I'm okay with Rock and Pai getting to date.

These two are very good at the aesthetics of an onscreen kiss.

Final Verdict: 9.5, This is Now My Default Version. I did not expect to come out on the other end of this liking the Thai version more than the Japanese live action, but here we are. Minus episode 8 (which I will pretend doesn't exist), this was perfect execution of the core premise and strong regard for the character dynamics. This show earned every moment, and managed to deliver a satisfying finale for the whole cast. It's been a long week of finales, and I like how good so many were. TayNew getting back together was not something I expected, and I'm so thrilled that they delivered such a strong outing. What a time to be a Cherry Magic fan. I'm excited to keep reporting on the anime and then talk about all three shows.

#Ben watches #cherry magic #cherry magic th #cherry magic thailand #cherry magic! thirty years of virginity can make you a wizard?!#30 sai made doutei dato mahoutsukai ni nareru rashii #thai bl #bl series

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theliterarywolf · 3 months

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Hazbin Hotel

The little pilot that could, the runaway hit with the simple premise of 'What if Sinners Could Be Redeemed, What Kind of People Would Want That, and What Kind of People Would Oppose?', now turned into an Amazon Original Animated Series. Sharing the same platform as Invincible and...

Uh...

Hm.

Anyway, this series has been a long, long, LONG time coming. To the point that we had people theorizing that the whole thing was a scam or that it would never come out.

I feel like those people could use a lesson on how time-consuming animation is, but I digress.

The point is, the series is out at last: debuting with four episodes on Amazon Prime with the rest of the season scheduled to come out weekly.

And what is there to say? Was the premiere worth the wait? Are these sinners doomed to burn in obscurity? Was watching these first four episodes a Helluva chore?

While it would be easy for me, as someone who has followed the 'Hellaverse' since the premiere of the original Hazbin Hotel pilot all those years ago, to just gush over the fact that all of these beloved characters have transcended the online space to mainstream screens, such flippant praise would be a disservice to my fellow creators.

Thus, to go about things in a bit more of a refined approach:

Hazbin Hotel (the series) takes the conventions of what was established in the pilot and refines them down into a more serialized story. The core premise is still the same: Charlie Morningstar, the idealistic Princess of Hell, daughter to fallen angel Lucifer and Adam's original wife Lilith, is taking it upon herself to end the qualms of Hell being both overpopulated and a target of Heaven's yearly extermination bloodbath by establishing a sanctuary for sinners to redeem themselves. The titular 'Hazbin Hotel' (originally the 'Happy Hotel').

Of course, such a premise in a literal den of sin and inequity is easier said than done and, so far, the series is doing a good job of showing Charlie learning that redemption isn't as easy as singing songs and making nice.

Though, rest assured, there is plenty of singing to bear witness to. Of course, with a cast of Broadway's finest, it's to be expected that the musical accompaniments will be just as much as a feast for the eyes as the colorful, unique character-designs.

Though, sometimes, those character-designs aren't able to shine as much as they should, which leads into my first critique. Which, considering there are only two, stands as a testament to the work Spindlehorse and BentoBox have accomplished her.

In the first two episodes (this issue seemed to have been fixed in episodes 3 and 4), there are countless instances of characters having odd shadowing. It has the unfortunate consequence of the characters moving like they aren't a part of their environment. Of course, again, this seemed to have been fixed for later episodes, so hopefully it doesn't show up again.

Back to the music: standout pieces, thus far, are Adam's taunting "Hell is Forever (Whether You Like it Or Not)", "It Starts With Sorry", "You're a Loser, Baby"... I'd also point out the bombastic duet between young upstart overlord Velvette and arms-dealer overlord Carmilla Carmine, but I forgot the name of it.

However, this leads into my second critique. During "Happy Day in Hell", Charlie's 'I Want' song (because every princess needs one), her girlfriend and main confidante Vaggie is back at the hotel singing her own additions to it. And everytime she sang, I just wanted to scream 'Can someone PLEASE tell this bitch to emote?!' Let it be understood that I know what the direction was: Charlie is being bombastic and bright and happy singing out her dreams and goals while Vaggie is lower, more realistic, and deadpan.

However, its the way that they had her new VA execute that direction that could have been a bit better because it doesn't stand out in the best way. Which is a shame, because later on when we hear Vaggie in both her duets with Carmilla and her love ballad to Charlie, her voice does wonders. Though, I have seen some people say that it might not be the same VA, which would be weird: why would you hire a Broadway VA and then just swap them out?

Other elements of note: Episode 4 is definitely my favorite so far, I gushed about the direction and delivery of the "Poison" sequence here, Zestial is one of my new favorite Hellaverse characters, I need merch of him pronto, and...

Oh! One final note:

Back when the original HH (the series) trailer and promo material was coming out, I had a slew of anons in my inbox bemoaning how the series is yet another 'Heaven is actually evil' plot. Yet, after watching these four episodes (episodes 1-2 three times each, twice since I had early-access and once more when the series premiered proper), the series narrative is less 'Heaven is evil and Hell is just misunderstood' and more 'Angels are fallible, demons are fallible, the notion of a status-quo is as fickle as rice paper but you have to do more to change it than sing about good vibes'.

Final Rating: 8/10

#Wolf Watches #hazbin hotel

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 7 months

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Okay, quick Taskmaster liveblogging this week. I’m fucking exhausted after a long and shitty week at work, I got home from work just after 7 PM, made myself some food, and I am now very pleased to get to sit down with a meal and the new Taskmaster episode. I do not have the energy to do what I sometimes do with these, which is take notes constantly through the whole episode. But I know I’ll want to say some things about it. So I will use this document as a thing to write down quick little things when they occur to me occasionally, rather than trying to cover the whole episode. It’s nice to have this back in my life for nine more weeks (well, eight more now, I guess).

Thoughts on Taskmaster s16e02, written as I watch it:

- I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: the funniest introductions are the ones where Greg pretends that Alex is right-wing for no reason.

- “Best sign” – I’m amazed that wasn’t taken already. You’d think Taskmaster would be out of the one-word ones, which is why they have to use “most < adjective > < noun >”, instead of just “most < adjective >” thing or “best < noun >”. But there’s still more stuff to do. I like that one, open-ended enough to leave room for interpretation, but still some solid boundaries they’ll have to stay within.

- It feels a bit like cheating for Sue Perkins to use her celebrity stories to garner points against people who just can’t compete with a story of the time Claudia Winkleman helped her steal a sign from the BBC. But I did enjoy that one.

- God, do I ever want to go to the British Library with Sam Campbell and steal shit. I think he wins in terms of aspirational stories, I’d rather rob the British Library with Sam Campbell than rob the BBC studios with Claudia Winkleman.

- I have seen the first three seasons of Meet the Richardsons (did not watch season 4 this year and I think I’ll probably leave it there, but I’m not sorry I watched it), and it’s definitely not the best show in the world, but one of my favourite parts was how cool that pub looked. That’s aspirational, it’s exactly the sort of thing I’d do if I had the money that they have. Make a full pub in your backyard where you can get the nice feeling of a pub but without the drawbacks, such as people you don’t know being in it and having to commute there and back (particularly bad, after drinking). Fucking lovely. The Jon Richardson I got attached to from radio 8 Out of 10 Cats/early Catsdown hasn’t existed for a long time, and that’s probably for the best and I’m glad he’s gone off to be happy even if I don’t find him as entertaining anymore, but I did enjoy seeing that pub in Meet the Richardsons like an example of success. Good for him. Nice prize, Lucy. You’re right, there is a warm feeling to it.

- Sammy C bringing his own equipment to the tasks. Following on from a couple of things he did last week, establishing a pattern of him doing things as a bit, because they are comedic, but also they happen to possibly give him an advantage in points. As someone who is backing him like he’s a sports team to win this season, I approve of this pattern.

- Listen, strange women standing around in Chiswick pulling on facsimile swords is no basis for a system of government. But I don’t know, maybe we should let Lucy Beaumont try running the UK for a year and see where they end up.

- I thought I wasn't going to do screenshots in this episodes, because these posts take so much longer when I stop to copy screenshots. But I have to say, the first proper laugh came from Sue throwing away the comment "I mean I want to go Widdicombe", then stopping, realizing what she'd just said, and you can watch the answer hit her:

Aw, I've just remembered the existence of that panel show hosted by Sue Perkins with Josh Widdicombe and Richard Osman as team captains, Insert Name Here. Slightly flimsy premise, uneven guests and execution, but three people who are so good at being on panel shows that it entertained me all the way through anyway.

I watched that show about 2 years ago when I was mainly into panel shows and thought Josh Widdicombe was a brilliant TV comedian who just happened to make not-great stand-up - now that I'm more into stand-up than panel shows, that flaw seems more significant than it used to. Also, I've given up on The Last Leg because they've gone all pro-monarchy but also if I'm honest they've been leaning toward the bland centre for a while (though I maintain that it had some years of being much better than that). But there was a time when Josh Widdicombe was one of my favourites of all these comedians, I still think he's very good on panel shows, so I'm enjoying his little cameo here (I did guess that Widdicombe was the answer as soon as Sue said "Devon", because what the hell else is from Devon?). Nice to honour both the first Taskmaster champion, and the first two-time champion.

On the subject of Sue Perkins and Josh Widdicombe existing in the same universe, aside from their endearing panel show Insert Name Here, remember that time when Sue Perkins went on The Last Leg wearing a Patti Smith shirt and one time she messed up her hair for no reason and I had to save that as a gif because I think it might be the cure for female heterosexuality?

- Watching this task for the second time, now that I know the answer. Obviously the foot that says “Greg” is a reference to Josh getting Greg’s name tattooed on his foot during season 1. “Devon” is where he’s from, as he talks about every time he’s on TV. But how does he make his hair smart? Is it just a reference to the fact that for a long time he was known for a particular haircut? Am I forgetting about something in the Josh Widdicombe canon (I say “forgetting” rather than “not knowing” because I have seen a hell of a lot of the things he’s done, including hundreds of hours of The Last Leg, arguably too many hours of The Last Leg…)? You’d think it would just be a reference to something he did on Taskmaster, like the tattoo. The main things Josh Widdicombe did on Taskmaster besides get a tattoo, I think, was count beans and fail to guess the rules of Alex Squash.

With Diamonds Come Bears was such an opaque club that they had to put it on the screen for us to understand it even once we did know the answer, but apparently the letters kind of line up. Then there’s that family tree showing how he’s descended from royalty, which he worked out from Who Do You Think You Are, and now talks about it every time he’s on TV.

- Interrupting my list of Widdicombe clues to say, why did Sam Campbell say Katherine Ryan has nothing to do with hair but “Bob Mortimer, that’s hair!” One of those people has objectively more hair than the other, and it’s not the one he described as “that’s hair!”.

- Did no one think before setting this task to check that Julian Clary has heard of Josh Widdicombe? That was pretty funny, watching Julian Clary walk around being unable to finish a task because he doesn't know Josh Widdicombe's name. Come on, Taskmaster, the small and nasally man with the short hair got a tattoo for this show. He does not deserve to have an entire task set up to emphasize the fact that Julian Clary doesn't know his name (he does, it was quite funny).

- Alex Horne, before this season started (paraphrased because I cannot be bothered to look up the actual quote): One contestant in particular put me in my place.

Julian Clary: "What sorts of people enjoy this show? Is it students?" "You're interesting, aren't you? Would you call yourself a charismatic man?"

- Susan Wokoma declaring that sexy dog subverts stereotypes made me laugh, Julian Clary referencing his dead art teacher very much added to that. I've watched most of the second task by now without stopping to write much because it's getting late and I'm tired, but that was fun.

- Lovely titled drop from Susan Wokoma. Very well delivered "Hell is here." She was kind of the quiet one last episode, is definitely making more of a mark this time.

- Look, if I wanted to be pedantic, I could make the argument that Sam Campbell's picture was much better than everyone else's and showed off artistic skill that clearly the others do not have, even though Sue Perkins' drawing was quite amusing, and therefore Sam deserved the five points alone. I mean, technically it was the best cheeky picture, not the cheekiest picture, and no matter how cheeky Sue's picture was, it wasn't as good a picture as Sam's. And if Sam Campbell loses this whole season to Sue Perkins by one point, I will absolutely be repeatedly making that argument that he was robbed in this task. But okay, fine, the idea of Sue Perkins making a dick joke is amusing. And yes, I'm aware that I'm watching Taskmaster wrong.

- Secret task gets mentioned again. I think the funniest option would be if it does exist, but it's useless. Like if there's a secret task somewhere telling them to do something huge and difficult and time-consuming and they have several months to do it and they have to bring it to the studio to complete it, and someone does do that, and then it's worth like half a point. Yeah it's a joke they've done before, but not for a while. They've used the idea sparingly enough in recent seasons so I think they could bring it back.

- Lucy Beaumont doing mischief by being an unethical fake psychic pretending to communicate with the dead to swindle people is a bit of a weird light given that I now know she does genuinely, literally believe in ghosts.

- Hang on. Hang on. Are they allowed to do that? They can set tasks for each other? A genuine first in a Taskmaster history, I'm almost sure. Susan Wokoma is out here re-inventing the game. I kind of want to know if anyone else in Taskmaster history has tried to affect one of their competitors' games and been told they're not allowed to, because if so, that's not fair to them that Susan could. But if she was the first person to think of it, then fair play to her.

To stop watching Taskmaster wrong (like a sports fan) for a moment and start watching it right (like a comedy fan), God that was funny. Watching Sam Campbell stand up and sit down and be so earnest about it and genuinely engaged and find a workaround to draw extra mice for extra points, while knowing it was all for nothing, was very funny. It's Widdicombe counting beans again. It's the thing I think they should do with the secret task. It's really funny to watch someone try hard when we know something they don't.

- After pretending to smash up Alex Horne's phone, I waited for what Sam Campbell would say, as he's had great lines throughout this show so far. But actually, I think leaving the room after saying nothing was the funniest thing he could have done. Solid instincts there.

- Sam Campbell threatens to make a prank phone call. Julian Clary writes prank longhand letters. The generational divide, everyone.

- Well, normally in my posts, I start out writing relatively little about things, and write more and more as the post goes along, so the things I write about later in the post get expanded on way more than the earlier things. This one is the opposite, because as I said, it's late and I've gotten more tired as it's gone along.

So I've finished the episode. I enjoyed the live task. I do always like the "do something while keeping eye contact with Greg" tasks. The main thing I have to say about that live task is... I don't know if this is quite the hardest I've laughed at season 16 so far. But it's definitely the longest. As in, I'm exhausted right now, I worked long hours today and long hours yesterday and it a few really stressful days and a long week and it's fairly late and I feel like my brain is fried, and for reasons I definitely cannot fully explain (if pressed, I could explain maybe about 20% of why this happened, at the most), this exact frame made me laugh uncontrollably for several minutes:

I just paused the video, stared at the screen, and could not stop laughing. There's a cat my lap the looked annoyed about it. Every time I tried to play the video again and move on with my life, I'd look at some new part of it and keep laughing. I took a screenshot so I can have it forever. The 20% that I can explain about why that happened does, again, involve using the word "earnest" to describe Sam Campbell's expression.

I also enjoyed Sue and Julian drawing the same thing (people who are older than the other contestants and also more famous than the other contestants and also gay are on the same wavelength as each other, apparently). And I liked Lucy Beaumont's peas.

I also enjoyed them bringing in another NZ task as the tiebreaker. Well done to Sue. I always like watching the rote memorization tasks, mainly because that's a skill I enjoy practising myself and I like to see if I can beat the contestants at it. I used to know pi to lots of places, back in high school, but I couldn't do that now. Could I memorize more digits than Sue did in the same number of seconds? Don't know, and am not awake enough to try it right now. Some other time.

I'm now going to sleep for a number of hours with two digits in it. Maybe three.

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my-emily-gilmore-era · 2 months

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Gilmores prove life doesn’t end after 40

By Deseret News Feb 7, 2005

UNIVERSAL CITY, Calif. — There's a certain irony in the fact that the WB — the network that targets teens and twentysomethings — has the two most believable, most well-rounded characters in their 60s on television.

And Richard and Emily Gilmore, as portrayed by 61-year-old Edward Herrmann and 60-year-old Kelly Bishop, have been an integral part of "The Gilmore Girls" since the show began 100 episodes ago.

"I know the WB is known as a young network and viewed, I think, a little bit too much that way," Bishop said. "This show is multigenerational. And, frankly, it's not about my own ego, but I wouldn't be inclined to watch this show as a viewer if it weren't for us, because I'm going to identify with an older person. I'm not going to be watching shows about teenagers because I've been there, done that."

In a medium that places such a high value on youth, the elder Gilmores are such an anomaly they're almost alone.

Herrmann replied with humor to questions about his "elder" status. "Let me get out of my wheelchair and dance," he said, affecting a truly elderly voice.

"That's kind of wonderful, too, that we're still alive," Bishop said. "And, what, 60 is the new 30, right?"

Well, maybe, but Richard and Emily have never had to act like teenagers to get airtime on "Gilmore Girls." They're not simply saccharin grandparents, they're complicated people living imperfect lives.

"It's interesting. It's wonderful," Herrmann said. "I mean, these people are lively. You don't die after the age of 40."

The Emmy-winning actor said the show's writers have "done a wonderful job with Richard."

"He's a fellow who's gone through a number of changes. . . . There have been a lot of plot lines for him, which I find true to life. So I haven't been bored at all."

The premise of the show is that their daughter, Lorelai (Lauren Graham), got pregnant when she was 16 and decided to keep and raise the baby on her own. Which, not surprisingly, drove a wedge between her and her parents.

A wedge that remained until Lorelai's daughter, Rory (Alexis Bledel), was a teenager and Lorelai had to turn to her wealthy parents for financial help to send Rory to private school. That reopened the daughter-parents relationship and gave Richard and Emily their first chance to really get to know their granddaughter, but it's a rift that's never been entirely healed.

"What I look for at the end of the tunnel is the reconciliation between (Richard and Lorelai) in some way," Herrmann said. But when he has raised the issue with creator/executive producer Amy Sherman-Palladino, "She said, 'Not yet. We can't. There's a wonderful tension between the two that you want to try to maintain.'

"So it's great fun. And, actually, (executive producers) Amy (Sherman-Palladino) and Dan (Palladino) have given us really good stuff to do this year."

Good stuff that culminates Tuesday (7 p.m., Ch. 30) as Richard and Emily renew their wedding vows. The couple, married almost four decades, have been separated since last season. Not separated by much — Richard moved into the pool house — but their relationship had deteriorated badly.

"I love the idea because I think that those of you who are in long-term relationships will realize that you have, of course, that initial love/lust and all that," Bishop said, "and then it settles down. And then it kind of hits a point sometimes in a relationship where you're really bored with the other person and kind of think, hmmmm.

"And then out of no place and for no particular reason . . . you look at the person one day and you are so in love with them all over again."

It made for some great material for Bishop and Herrmann. Over the 99 previous episodes, they've done comedy, they've done drama, they've had surprises and they've always come across as real.

"The palette is rich. There's a lot of stuff to talk about," Herrmann said.

"I mean, almost to slapstick," Bishop said. "I finally got to do physical comedy climbing out of the basement window. (Richard accidentally locked Emily in.) That was so much fun."

And she loves playing a woman who's not exactly a caring, nurturing mother/grandmother. Emily Gilmore loves Lorelai and Rory, but she expresses that love in a manipulative way that drives her daughter crazy.

She's at it again in the 100th episode, using Rory's father, Christopher (David Sutcliffe), to try to end Lorelai's romance with Luke (Scott Patterson) — a relationship she doesn't approve of.

"I've gotten some really nice, vicious things to say to people," Bishop said, "which I always enjoy. . . . She's a piece of work, but, yeah, I had a lot of fun this year. Amy gave me some really nasty things to say."

Sherman-Palladino is amused at how Bishop — "one of the nicest people in the world" — takes so much joy in playing Emily, who is not. "I just love that she's so excited that she gets to be horrible to people."

But Bishop said she doesn't always understand viewers' reactions to the character.

"I'm surprised. People seem to really like her. And I haven't figured that out yet, because I think she's just horrible," she said. "I love playing her because she's so mean.

"And every once in a while people say they identify with her and I say, 'Why? I'm glad you're enjoying my performance, but you don't have to like Emily. Because I don't particularly like her. I like playing her.' "

#Gilmore girls #emily gilmore #kelly bishop #richard gilmore #edward herrmann #amy sherman palladino #lauren graham #lorelai gilmore #stars hollow #article #interview #personal

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semper-legens · 5 months

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171. The Sleepwalker, by Robert Muchamore

Owned: No, library Page count: 312 My summary: A plane breaks up in the air, plunging into the ocean with no survivors. The government is quick to suspect the worst, looking into terrorist links. And in the midst of it all, they get a phone call from a scared boy, alleging that his father had something to do with it. Now Lauren Adams is deputised to find out exactly what this kid knows, and quickly. They won't have the clearance to follow this hunch for long. My rating: 3/5 My commentary:

I've gotten my hands on the final four CHERUB books as a job lot, so expect them to come at a bit of a faster rate until I'm completely done with them. That said, more CHERUB! I'm amazed that I still remember this series as well as I do. Like I've been saying as I go through them, I'm finding them a lot less easy to enjoy than I did when I was a teenager, both for normal and unavoidable reasons (I'm an adult, these books are not aimed at me anymore) and for more troubling ones (the simplistic explanations of complex morality questions, the casual bigotry on display). Nonetheless, I still think that this idea of a teen spy network is interesting enough to warrant these books' existence. The problem is in the execution, not the idea, which means there's still enough here that's interesting to me that I can carry on with it. So, let's get into the Sleepwalker.

Unusually, this is a book that's about Lauren. She has the A plot, while James is stuck in a B plot that doesn't really go anywhere. (More on that in a bit.) Unfortunately, this isn't really the most riveting of CHERUB missions. Lauren and Jake are going in to talk to Fahim and get more detail about what he knows, but they're not really in deep cover - they're literally just going to ask him. Lauren gets to show off a cool head and just why she's one of the youngest black shirts ever. She's composed, makes good decisions, is ethical, and generally has a good head on her shoulders; this in contrast to Jake, who makes some serious schoolboy errors on the mission. But it's not as action packed as James' missions, or the past missions where we've seen Lauren deployed. It is good to see Lauren showing the maturity to get put back as senior agent on missions again after her misconduct punishments, but this one was sort of underwhelming for me.

James, meanwhile, is doing work experience in a fast food place. The premise here just felt contrived - the conflict is that other kids have gotten the more vaunted positions, so James is stuck at the fast food place with his ex-girlfriend. But like, the CHERUB staff are supposed to be good at understanding the dynamics between their agents, surely they can see that this is a bad idea? They end up getting close to their coworker, who has a sh--ty boyfriend, which leads to a fight. James and Kerry get yelled at over it and assigned punishment, but they've hit it off again, leaving Kerry to hit on James and James, surprisingly, to turn her down out of loyalty to Dana. I just…I didn't come into this series for the domestic lives of teens, you know? I don't care. Get back to the missions. All this will-they-won't-they feels jarringly out of place.

And now, for the elephant in the room. I've spoken before about how the CHERUB series more often than not falls down when it tries to address social issues, and the main plot of this book is a really good example of this. Lauren is investigating an eleven year old boy whose father is potentially involved with the loss of an aeroplane, which was brought down killing everyone on board. The kid's name is Fahim Bin Hassam, and he's of Arabic descent. The plane crashed on September the tenth. Obviously, people assume that terrorism was the reason behind the crash. As it turns out, it was actually a faulty part supplied by Fahim's father - he's a smuggler, but not a terrorist. Interesting twist, right? The problem with that is that Hassam is the exact stereotype of a controlling Muslim father. He's gotten rich through crime, beats his wife and son, kills his wife when he suspects she's going to the police, wants his son to be brought up in Abu Dhabi with his relatives where he will get a strict education, is casually misogynistic and exploits his cleaner, and hates how 'westernised' his son has become despite not exactly being the most devout or traditional himself. It's not a subversion of stereotypes about Muslim men if it then plays into every single one of those stereotypes at the same time. Hassam is given no redeeming features and no humanising moments, no nuance. He's a crook and a bad person, plain and simple. And that's just as much a stereotype as portraying him as bringing down the plane in a deliberate act of terrorism would have been.

Next up, an anthology of queer writings through time.

#The Sleepwalker #Robert Muchamore #bookblr #book blog #book blogger #3

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eastgaysian · 1 year

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I’ve tried to right this ask twice but tumblr keeps EATING IT but maybe third try will work. Anyways you’re right about Yellowjackets I’m 100% behind you there. I didn’t pick up on the racialized stuff but it’s definitely there and you make some good points. At best it’s thoughtless writing. And I already had gripes with the supernatural elements because they don’t feel well integrated to me and they feel kind of unnecessary. Additionally I have some other gripes with general writing/character development. The premise is interesting and the bones of something good are there but I think the execution is pretty mediocre. It’s fun to watch and it’s not bad, it has its moments, but it’s not on the level of something like the Terror. Which is fine! Not every show can be the Terror. And I also COMPLETELY agree that trying to say something interesting and failing is better than saying nothing, I’m a huge supporter of failed creative risks because that’s how you get good creative risks. But I do feel a bit, as caden romanroydinnerparty put it, “themes-baited”. Anyways I mostly just wanted to say you’re right about everything and you put into words a bunch of stuff I couldn’t so mwah 😘

personally i think they should change tv so every show is either the terror or succession. but maybe that's just me

i hate to say the show is 'overhyped' because i do enjoy watching it, and i understand exactly why people like and are invested in it, but yeah i did feel kind of let down... the bones of something good are there! but they're not quite fleshed out enough to cohere into something satisfying and the show feels unfocused as a result. like there's individual things i find fun or cool, but they're individual things that weren't expanded on or connected to each other. that shot with lottie in front of the deer antlers was fun. the shot where shauna sees jackie and it's actually callie was fun. Would've loved if those factored into a real consistent overarching motif or something

honestly my first approach to most media is to look at things from the lens of race or colonialism, and succession is a notable exception because the show has a clear focus that's Not race or colonialism. but yeah i understand why it might not immediately jump out to someone. again i'm not cancelling the show it's just like... more instances of me being disappointed by what feels like thoughtless writing. it wouldn't be so disappointing if i didn't think there was real promise :/

#mingbox #love u brenna 💕 unbelievable tumblr tried to censor this ask. smh

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dans-den · 1 year

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Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves Review

Hey what’s going on everyone?! It’s Dan here and today I’ll be reviewing Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves!

Warning!: May contain some spoilers!

I’m not gonna lie to you guys, March has been Medieval March Madness for me. March is my birthday month and I’ve been going to the Medieval Renaissance Festival, then I saw a Jousting show and now I'm watching D&D movies. I even bought a mug at the Jousting show. I enjoyed all of it, now I just need to play actual D&D and it’ll all come full circle. Honestly this movie looked dope when I saw the trailers and seeing the actual movie, the trailers are different from the actual movie, but in a good way.

When I saw the trailer for this movie, I was under the impression that it would be about taking something from the Red witch lady or stealing something from her. I was under the impression she would be the main focus of this film but it turned out that was only half the battle. Turns out the main focus of this film is Edgin Darvis (Chris Pine) breaking out of prison and reuniting with his daughter, Kira (Chloe Coleman). However, she’s been manipulated by Forge Fitzwilliam (Hugh Grant) into thinking her father abandoned her and now Edgin has to gather a group of misfits like an amateur wizard, a warrior lady banished from her tribe, and a shapeshifter to go and save his daughter all while taking Fitzwilliam and the witch down. You’d think that would be an average movie premise but the way they executed it, is awesome. This movie is better than I would have expected and it does go above and beyond in terms of VFX, witty writing for the characters, the action, even the acting flowed well bringing these characters to life.

Let’s start with the VFX, I think these effects are better than what Marvel is pumping out nowadays on Disney+ or even the Modok memery. I loved the effects in this movie and they did an excellent job bringing the fantasy world creatures to the big screen. The magic was done well too, it didn’t look cheaply done and it was all smooth transitions. The VFX doesn’t really have any bad moments or times where it looks janky. I know the budget is like 150 million but that’s money well spent on the visual effects.

The cast of this film did a phenomenal job with their roles. Each character had their chance to shine in one way shape or form. I will say the least amount of character development I saw was from Doric, but even she came to her own conclusion about humans and how she originally felt about them. Though I will say that one of my nitpicks about this film is the relationship between Simon and Doric, they do have a history together and at the end where they consider revisiting that, felt a bit underwhelming despite this being from the amazing growth from Simon. One of my favorite characters in this film is Xenk Yendar who is a Harper but also a Paladin. He’s someone who takes everything literal and it's funny shit, he’s like the Knuckles of the group (he’s with them for a single mission which is a shame).

I will say that for the writing, it’s hilarious, witty, charming, and above all fun. The writing pokes fun at certain movie cliches as well as narration to sum up the plot or situation. The writing works especially with Forge since he’s more of a comical villain. He does have his ruthless moments but I feel he was written to be more of a comedic relief villain, kind of like Modok but actually funny and written to be a real threat. There are times where I feel the movie’s writing is a bit meh but honestly those are blink and you miss it moments that I can forgive. I did feel the final battle was rushed a little but like I said it doesn’t bother me that much though I did wish there was more build up to that final battle.

Overall the movie itself was definitely one of the better movies I’ve seen by far this year. While Paramount shows can suck major cheeks at times, I will say their films are bangers. D&D is a fun game and the fact that they brought it to the big screen in the best way is great. I know there are other D&D movies dating back to the 2000’s and I heard those weren’t as great but I am glad that this one was done so with fun writing and great effects in mind.

Rating this film I’d give it:

8.5/10

I highly recommend seeing this film, it’s a fun time for everyone even if you’re not into D&D or fantasy. I hope more fantasy or D&D related stuff takes notes from this movie while improving on the weaker areas. That’s all I got for today

See ya!

#dans den #dungeons and dragons #honor among thieves #eone #hasbro #fantasy #movie review #paramount #paramount pictures #role playing games

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waheelawhisperer · 11 months

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Okay lads and lasses, time for me to share my thoughts on Volume 9 of RWBY's 9th episode. Just this one and the finale left to go and I will finally be done.

Content warning for this post and episode: suicide.

So far the writers have killed two members of Team RWBY and replaced them with facsimiles meant to imitate their former selves and had another one kill herself on-screen while her teammates stood and watched. Before we begin, let's pour one out for Yang and Blake, cruelly struck down before their time and replaced with Yikes and Boring.

No content warning this time. Hopefully that's a good sign, but with this show and company, who even knows?

So I guess that’s Summer reading a bedtime story to Yikes and Ruby

At least we know what her voice sounds like now. I’m assuming the fact that she has an actual model and VA means she’ll be somewhat relevant in the last two episodes of the Volume and possibly going forward

Lmao Yikes and Ruby have bigass heads did they just stick their adult heads on child models or something

Jaune: “I don’t understand”

That’s nothing new for you buddy, being clueless has kind of been your gimmick for a while now

Great the paper people are back except now they’re fucking rocks

You’re not winning a rock paper scissors game like this guys

White Knight shippers are feasting this Volume god damn

Oh goodie everyone’s hugging Jaune

Why does Yikes have a big fucking grin on her face when her sister just fucking killed herself

It’s like the writers saw the people saying “Yang doesn’t care about Ruby” and thought “Wow that is a fantastic idea let’s use that”

If there was anything left of the character we once knew as Yang after last episode, it's gone now

No but seriously why did we go from Ruby drinking suicide tea while everyone stood there and stared to nobody being allowed to grieve openly to everybody being happy and huggy and comforting FUCKING JAUNE

Seriously Miles you're still not beating the self-insert allegations here can we please go for one fucking Volume without the character you voice upstaging everyone who actually matters

When this episode first aired, I saw people saying that we needed a scene where the characters actually got to fucking respond to Ruby killing herself in front of them, which really stuck with me because it was one of the rare instances of even diehard fans being critical of the show. When the cult members start questioning things instead of making excuses for them, that’s when you know you’ve fucked up.

Anyway I agree that having a scene where the characters actually got to process Ruby’s death instead of instantly running for the Tree and finding the gem people so everything could be about Jaune again would’ve helped smooth this storyline out a bit. The “suicide is an improvement, actually” aspects of it still make the premise fundamentally shit but they could’ve executed on the fundamentally-shit premise better here.

This scene is cute out of context honestly but in-context it blows

I think they’re trying to convey that seeing the gem people is supposed to be a source of hope – the gem people came back “better” after Ascension – but that doesn’t really work for me when the show has been hammering in the message that Ascension takes away who you are. Some core remains, but the memories are gone and you become something new. What Jaune and WBY know right now is that anything that comes out of the Tree won’t be the Ruby Rose they knew. By the rules the show has established thus far, Ruby is dead. Ruby wanted to be dead. Ruby said she didn’t want to be Ruby Rose anymore and took steps to make that happen. Neo gave her the tea thinking it would erase her from existence. Neo made an effort (successfully) to break Ruby to the point where she wanted to be erased from existence. Ruby drank the tea assuming it would erase her from existence. The show has equated going to the Tree with, at minimum, a death of personality throughout the season. Ruby. Fucking. Killed. Herself. She wanted to die.

I know this show is going to cop the hell out because it would never ever have the balls to actually grapple with the ramifications of the main character offing herself but God am I not looking forward to seeing it

Like I don't see a way the narrative can spin this choice without either killing off the main character for realsies (they won't, they'd never have the nuts for that) or presenting suicide as a solution to your problems.

Anyway as soon as you accept that suicide is the solution you can warp to the Tree I guess

Finally Yikes shows some reaction to her sister’s death

The message here is apparently “accept it when people close to you kill themselves, this is totally fine actually”

“We’ve done everything we can” like what, Weiss? Ignore her pain all Volume and then stand there and stare for 20 seconds while she drank poison in front of you?

You don’t have to welcome shit, Weiss. Your friend/sister/teammate or whatever the hell she is to you at this point just killed herself. You don’t actually have to be happy with that. Fuck this Volume for insisting you do.

Great question, Yikes. At least someone is acknowledging the implications here.

It's fine, Boring will soothe away your tears and the shippers will go wild

Blacksmith lady’s back again. Is that Little’s mask she’s shaping?

The cop-out’s already starting. Wonderful.

Well we finally found the way back home (maybe). At least this shitshow is almost over.

The Curious Cat is definitely a cat. Beefing it in front of others and then pretending nothing happened and you meant to do it all along is, in fact, peak cat behavior.

Throw some shade, Weiss.

Oh, so the Cat tried to use Alyx to get to Remnant somehow.

So all this time we’ve been thinking Alyx sacrificed Lewis, but instead she may have sacrificed herself

If the Cat’s telling the truth, that means Lewis wrote the book and portrayed Alyx as a hero and erased any mention of himself

The Cat’s implying they killed Alyx, but I wonder how true that is

Anchor Arms Neo is so funny to me

Looks like Cat-Neo is going to be the final boss

Lmao the fucking zombie Rubies this shit is too funny

I cannot take Cat-Neo seriously as a threat at this point

Oh that was fucking cruel poor Jaune is getting torn apart this Volume

Just stomp on his trauma why don’t you lmao

Weiss adds insult to injury by blasting him off the Tree, but sadly most likely not out of the narrative

Ruby found Summer’s weapon. Guess we’re getting Summer info next episode.

This episode felt more like the first part of Episode 10 than an actual episode in its own right not gonna lie

The first half was shit and the second half was forgettable, reversing the trend of the last couple episodes

Overall rating: BLOWS A BAG OF DICKS/10

#rwby

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littlealeta · 2 years

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Can anyone tell me what people see in this new season of Rick and Morty? Yeah I haven’t seen any episodes in their entirety (only a few clips like I said I would) and I have been researching information about it because OCD won’t let me get away from this piece of crap but I really don’t see what all the rave is about with this season. I may or may not have women’s intuition but this overall season just sounds weird. Each episode just sounds mediocre like I have yet to see an actual decent episode even season 4 had a couple of decent episodes. Maybe Solaricks is probably the only one close to decent. I know it’s too early to tell but so far, this ranks below season 4 for me and maybe slightly above 5 (5 was all around mediocre and had some of the worst episodes in the show and I didn’t even watch episodes 2, 4-7)

To me, this new season just doesn’t feel like Rick and Morty while also suffering from some of the same issues seasons 3-5 had. The only good things I would say is that there are still jokes, it’s not entirely unfunny. They have good premises but poor execution. They at least have plot and character development without getting rid of them or insulting the audience. Jerry is an actual character from what I heard of. Rick is a bit more caring and emotional than he was last season but he still feels very off. I don’t mind Rick getting nicer but he just seems overall soft especially with his family almost like a goody-goody. And this is RICK we’re talking about. Rick may have a caring and loving side but soft is the last thing I would use to describe him and I just don’t see why he would get to this point especially this soon. Not to mention Rick’s overly soft attitude also makes him less compelling as a character and more like what Jerry used to be, just a doormat to his family’s bs.

I was hoping that Morty’s new codependency in the season 5 finale was just character bastardization that the writers were eventually going to take back but no. Solaricks and Rick: A Mort Well Lived are continuing to double down on this with Morty craving affection from Rick, showing lots of open affection, and having separation anxiety from him.

It’s like the writers are trying to do the innocent child and hardened adult relationship in the way that it is almost always done. Just all around wholesome and loving. Now there are characters that kind of started out like Rick such as Joel from The Last of Us or Gru from Despicable Me that were asses to their adopted kids in the beginning just like Rick did with his grandson but unlike Rick, Joel and Gru actually had believable buildup to being nice to the children. But what did Rick do to earn Morty’s attachment and being nice to Morty? Sure he had buildup to start caring for his family but as far as being wholesome to Morty? Barely there and mostly the result of the shallow crow arc. What reason would there be for Morty to start being attached to Rick? Sure he always cared for Rick deep down but he was never this lovey dovey or attached to him up until now. Rick spent a day with rebounds then all of a sudden, he’s changed? Not only is it out of character for Rick to want to spend time with someone trying to improve him and then openly admit that he’s fucked up but it’s also rushed. The crows told him to save a couple of aliens and then partnered up with him for anime adventures. How in God’s name would this change his relationship with Morty?

Look, I don’t have a problem with Rick and Morty’s relationship becoming more wholesome somewhere down the line. I love this trope wholeheartedly and I would love to see it in Rick and Morty. But it’s just so cheesy because they are doing this too quick with no buildup or reason to it. If they really wanted to do it, take notes from how Last of Us and Despicable Me did with their irritable, cold protagonists warming up to their children.

They also brought back Rick’s OPness when I thought after destroying the finite curve that caused him to be this powerful/smart in the first place were the writers getting rid of this flaw but ig not. :(

It just feels like the writers are writing Rick and Morty in a way that they and/or the fans fantasize. With Rick and Morty having a more loving relationship, Rick being an all-powerful God who can conquer anything, all the pointless cartooniness. People need to understand that this is 2022, not the 1960s. Cartoons have been starting to branch out from weird absurd looney tunes esque gags for decades now with even Disney branching out of it and Rick and Morty was one of those cartoons with cartoony elements like Rick getting buff with Summer being rare/almost non-existent and the absurdities of the sci fi being the main point of the show. Even when it did get cartoony, because being cartoony isn’t its main identity, the cartoony aspects were more for a joke AND they also had a purpose to it. They didn’t use cartooniness to undermine and automatically get rid of conflict conflict like seasons 3-6 do. The cartoony stuff in Night Family were just there just to be there. They had no point to them and I don’t think a lot of them were even played for jokes.

To me, I think that it’s because the writers are writing in a way the fans fantasize and also they could be giddy because season 5 was so weak for a Rick and Morty season. I also noticed this in the Sonic fandom with Sonic fans who hate Modern Sonic games praising the movies to high heaven despite them actually being pretty mediocre.

Rick and Morty isn’t a show about a loving grandpa and grandson relationship nor was it a show about a terminator who can conquer anything. It’s a show about a super smart broken scientist struggling to learn to care for his family. He was never supposed to be OP and its core identity was never to be cartoony at least in the way things like Looney Tunes, SpongeBob, or Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs are. The writers need to look at what the show is and not what it should be to the point of immediately changing its identity to make it look like almost a completely different show.

You can really tell that the creators are hands-off with this show because of how unique this particular season feels. It’s been going in weird directions since season 3 so yeah it’s partially Harmon’s fault but I thought season 3 was an oopsy and that they were going to learn from their mistakes but I also heard Justin Roiland quit helming the show around season 4.

It’s clear that Rick and Morty fans can eat pretty much anything up so I don’t think that changing the show back to its original identity would hurt it too much.

#rick and morty #season 6 #note i don't usually like cartoony gags but at least it's always been a core identity of the stuff i mentioned and not #something that suddenly came up later on #ik y'all probably thinking i'm overanalyzing a show whose motto is don't think about it #but it just feels too off for me to enjoy now

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annisthree · 2 years

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Prologue: Choice

series masterlist // next chapter

Pairing: Cassian Andor x Original Female Character

Word Count: ~5k

Warnings: Explicit language, canon-typical violence, angst

Summary: War leaves you broken and disillusioned, especially if it’s all you have ever known. You learn not to own too many things, not to make any plans, and not to get attached to people. But that deceptive sense of safety always eventually crumbles, and when you can no longer hide behind your walls, you are forced to face everything you have been so carefully repressing.

In the midst of a war, Marla and Cassian find that the Empire might not be the most terrifying thing they have to confront. Both endlessly devoted to the Rebellion, both living on borrowed time - they will have to learn that running away isn’t always the best solution.

A/N: This is the first story I've written in forever. I'm a nervous wreck.

Cross-posted on AO3 (same username)

// Revised on 5th Jan 2023. I made some small changes to one scene; the plot remains the same, I just polished some things up ;)

'South entrance is all clear. We're ready to advance on your mark.'

'Any signs of trouble?'

'No, looks like the intel was legit. How's security?'

'We've breached the system, cameras are looped. They won't know what hit them.'

'That's what I like to hear. Okay, Team Alpha, you're in. Bravo, stand by. Good hunting, everyone. '

The sound of heavy rain made it nearly impossible to communicate, so they relied on their earpieces. Water was pouring down everywhere, soaking their clothes and getting into their eyes, which made the task more difficult than it should have been. Nevertheless, Marla knew where they were going - they went over the blueprints dozens of times back at the base. They had been camping here for hours, giving her more than enough opportunities to plan their route properly.

They chose to set their temporary camp - more like a couple of crates and a bunch of speeders covered by a canvas - on a hill directly overlooking the weapons factory. The thick forest provided good enough cover, and the high ground would be a tactical advantage for their snipers, should things go south.

They'd been there for three, maybe four hours, and the sun was beginning to set (not that it mattered; the thick clouds hanging over the valley made it barely possible to distinguish the day from night). There hasn't been much Imperial activity, apart from one convoy of heavily armoured trucks that came and went at the exact time they expected it to, further confirming the validity of the information they had gathered in the weeks prior to the mission.

For a place advertised as the Empire's gift to the hard-working citizens of Malastare, it sure as hell looked more like a prison than an actual workplace. At least twenty heavily armoured troopers were patrolling the outside of the facility at all times. Marla wondered if they cared more about keeping people out or keeping them in, forced to work inhumanely long hours and contribute to manufacturing the very weapons that could later be used to execute their friends and families.

They wouldn't be there today, though - a tip from one of the Rebellion's sympathisers helped them schedule the attack during one of the periodical maintenance shifts. Every couple of weeks, the factory workers were to vacate the premises and let a group of droids inspect and repair any faulty machinery. Their informant had also supplied them with a blueprint of the facility and a very high-level overview of the security. Anything more detailed they were able to deduce during the several hours they had spent observing the factory, which also helped them find an access point to the security cameras. This, in turn, had allowed them to hack into the system and put the signal on the loop - instead of turning the cameras off completely, they manipulated the output so that it would show the same one hour of footage on repeat. A bit risky, but it could buy them some time.

Their job was fairly straightforward - they were to sneak up to the southern entrance and get in (with a bit of help from Chor'datta, a Twi'lek engineer who was the closest thing they had to a tech specialist). Then, the three of them would have to make their way around the factory, preferably without raising any alarms, plant charges in several strategic places, and then promptly get the fuck out. Easy enough, especially considering that the factory would be mostly empty, save a small group of repair droids and maybe a couple of guards.

From the corner of her eye, Marla saw Chor'datta and Travner (assigned to the team as backup firepower, in case they did trigger an alarm) getting ready to advance forward. She shot them a quick, confident glance, took one last look at Saw and the rest of their group, and then began to make her way towards the southern entrance.

She sensed something was off as soon as they entered the facility. Just a gut feeling, but a strong one - one of those that makes you stop in your tracks without a tangible reason.

And she was right; the suspicion was quickly confirmed when they almost bumped into one of the facility workers, who was carrying a large crate towards the main factory hall. Luckily, Marla spotted him before they got noticed and immediately pulled the rest of her team into a nearby supply closet.

'That did not look like a maintenance droid to me,' whispered Chor'datta, her huge eyes widening even more.

'Seems like the intel was crap after all,' Marla murmured, reaching for her comlink.

'Everything all right down there?' Saw's voice cut through the silence. Marla prayed the durasteel doors were soundproof enough to prevent them from being overheard.

'Yeah, no. Not really,' there was no point hiding her frustration. 'This place is full of civilians, Saw, something must have changed, or we were lied to. We'll sneak out the way we came in. Cover the exit.'

She was just about to turn off the comlink when Saw spoke again.

'Wait. Did anyone see you?'

'We almost bumped into one guy, but we managed to hide. I don't get how this is-'

'Good. You are to advance as planned. Make sure to stay undetected and contact me as soon as the charges are ready. Is that understood?'

Marla could barely see her companions' faces in the darkness, but the entire room was humming with tension. For a moment, the only sound in the room was that of little water droplets hitting the floor, creating a small puddle around them. She wasn't sure if her shaking was due to being drenched and cold or if it was anger. Probably a bit of both.

What kind of an order was that? Did he not hear what she'd said?

'Commander, I'm gonna need you to repeat that,' she hissed.

'Don't be stupid, Marla. This isn't duelling pistols at dawn; this is war. There are always some casualties. Your orders are to distribute the charges and get out without being seen. We can talk about morality some other time.'

'You're kidding, right? Saw, there are people-'

'-people who would surely understand this place needs to be destroyed, no matter the cost. If you attempt to warn them, you will get spotted, and then the plan goes to hell,' Saw's voice suspended for a moment. 'You have your orders, Lieutenant. If I don't hear an explosion within the next half an hour, I'm sending in the second team.'

Marla narrowly resisted the urge to punch her fist into the wall and start screaming. Face heating up and jaw clenching painfully, she drew a long breath, directing all of her energy into trying not to say something she would regret. It felt like hours before Saw spoke again.

'Lieutenant? Do I need to send in another team?'

'No, sir. We're on it.'

As they sneaked further down the corridors, Marla became increasingly aware of two things. First, her breath was twice as fast, far from the steady, confident rhythm from the beginning of the mission. And second: both Chor'datta and Travner were practically on the verge of throwing away their weapons and storming out the nearest exit. They were rookies, both of them having only joined Saw's cell a couple of weeks ago. Marla, on the other hand, had the benefit of prior military training and the experience of fighting with the Partisans for over a year. She knew Saw was no stranger to controversial tactics. He could speak for hours about the cause and how they were the only chance to stop the spread of the Imperial virus. He had incredible natural charisma and could make everyone he spoke to feel like they were the most critical part of the Rebellion. His fiery speeches helped ignite the coldest hearts with hope and determination. She always knew it was a powerful gift - and now, she was beginning to see how treacherous it could also be.

Well, too late for second thoughts. She would have a chance to confront him afterwards, to yell at his stupid face and tell him exactly what she thought of his orders. For now, she clenched her fists, turned around to throw a confident, calming (and absolutely fake) look at her companions, and continued walking down the corridor.

They managed to plant five out of six charges without any significant issues. Their informant might have been wrong (or lying) about the maintenance shift, but at least the blueprints were accurate.

The last device needed to be planted on one of the load-bearing walls in the primary storage room, right in the heart of the factory. Saw wanted to ensure all the weapons were destroyed, and collapsing the whole structure seemed like a perfect way to achieve that.

That is until they learned that there are people inside.

Marla quickly brushed off the thought. If they backed out now, Saw would just send in another team to finish the job.

'Okay. Do your thing, Chor'datta,' she said, pointing a the wall. The Twi'lek retrieved the explosives from her bag and moved in to mount them in place.

And then they heard a quiet click, followed by a low, raspy voice.

'I wouldn't do that if I were you.'

Within a split second, Marla turned around and pointed her blaster at the source of the unfamiliar voice. She was now facing a young human male dressed in blue coveralls - the same guy they had almost bumped into before. This time, though, instead of carrying a box of tools, he was pointing a gun at her.

'Since we're out here giving out life advice,' she sneered, the smugness in her voice intended to cover up the unease, 'I'd strongly recommend dropping this thing before you hurt yourself.'

The man let out a short huff of laughter, but his expression quickly became unreadable again. He was fully alert, his dark eyes surveying the faces around him.

Something about that probing stare made Marla uneasy. What was he trying to do?

Each second of silence only deepened her reservations. Something was off about him - how would a factory worker even get a blaster? And, perhaps more importantly - why?

Meanwhile, the stranger's gaze shifted from their faces to the unarmed explosives, where it lingered for a moment before returning to Marla.

'I see. Judging by the subtlety of your tactics,' he paused, pointing his chin at the explosives, his eyes still locked on Marla, 'I'm guessing you're one of Saw's people? They warned me you've been sniffing around recently.'

'Wait, I don't-' Travner's dumbfounded question came before Marla could react. She almost rolled her eyes.

'Look, I appreciate the effort, but you're in my way. I had been working on this cover for weeks; I'm not letting you blow it up. Literally,' the stranger motioned his free hand towards the explosives while one of his eyebrows quirked up slightly. 'As to my blaster,' he looked back at Marla with a barely noticeable smirk, 'I'd be more than happy to demonstrate my skill.'

The four of them just stood there for a moment, silence so tangible it was almost suffocating. Marla and the stranger were still staring down the barrels of each other's guns. Chor'datta froze mid-movement with an unarmed explosive in her hand. Travner was standing the farthest away, silently assessing the situation and slowly trying to inch his hand towards his blaster.

'Listen,' Marla snapped, feeling more and more frustrated at the unwelcome interruption. 'It seems to me we have the same goal. Let's just drop the weapons, we'll finish our job, and we can take you with us on our way out.'

'Are you out of your mind?' he growled, losing for a moment the mask of composure and confidence. 'Do you know how many people are in this factory? How many civilians?'

'Eliminating this factory will be a huge blow to the Empire's-' Marla started subconsciously reciting Saw's arguments, only to lose all of her confidence mid-sentence. Yes, he was annoying. But he wasn't exactly wrong.

'Which is exactly what I was sent here to do. My plan, however, involved some actual strategy instead of just mindlessly blowing everything up.'

'Look, we're wasting our time,' Marla tried to match his confidence, fully aware of her companions' faltering courage. 'We all need to get out of here, fast. Stop playing a hero, and let us finish our job.'

In response to her words, the man visibly tightened the grip on his blaster and took a step in their direction.

'You're free to leave once you hand over the charges and the detonator.'

Marla let out an annoyed growl, trying to mask the tension building up in her body, 'Are you really going to...'

'Hey! Stop right there!' a sudden shout made them all shift their attention to the door and the frozen silhouette of a Stormtrooper peering from the corridor.

It only took moments for the Stormtrooper to fall unconsciously to the floor with a loud thump that was surely heard on the other side of the building.

'So you really do know how to use it, huh?' Marla murmured, pointing her chin at the stranger's raised gun.

She saw him tensing up and opening his mouth to say something, but it suddenly drowned in the sounds of sirens. Then, everything happened at once. They heard a loud thump of dozens of armoured boots, louder and louder with each passing second. The sirens were still blaring, hurting her ears, drilling a hole in her skull.

And then they heard voices just outside the open door, and soon enough, the corridor outside became swarmed with white-clad figures.

She knew they were substantially outnumbered, but the narrow entryway acted in their favour - as long as they could keep them from crossing the threshold, the Stormtroopers would be slowed down, cramped in the crowded corridor outside.

Marla and her companions found cover behind stacks of crates scattered around the storage room, ducking in and out in a frenzy, almost matching the tempo dictated by the steady blare of sirens.

The remnants of the rain on her forehead now began to mix with sweat. She heard Travner's frantic groans from across the room and saw Chor'datta curled behind a crate, hugging her rifle with her eyes closed tightly shut, flinching with each gunshot that tore the room. Looking down at her hands, Marla saw her knuckles turning white, fingers clenched tightly around the gun.

They managed to take down about a dozen stormtroopers, but they kept coming in, waves of white armour pouring in from the corridor.

'Everyone down!' she heard Travnor yell, and immediately glued her back to the steel crate she was hiding behind.

What followed was a deafening blast of the explosion, tearing down the room. For a split second, Marla thought someone had activated the charges, and the entire factory was caving in over their heads. It took her a moment to open her eyes again, only to discover the room mostly intact but for a gaping hole where the doors - and the Stormtroopers - used to be.

She knew the painful ringing in her ears would not subside for hours, but admittedly the thermal detonator seemed to have done the job. The sirens were still on, but there was no more running, no more blasters pointed at them - only bodies, a pile of white armour speckled with red.

'Everyone all right? We need to move. There's gonna be more of them any minute.'

Marla threw a quick glance at the stranger - who seemed breathless but otherwise fine - then at Chor'datta, still frozen in place, curled up behind her cover, staring ahead with wide, hollow eyes. Travner was the only one who got hit - his left arm was limp and soaked with blood. Noticing her stare, he gave her a faint smile, 'Nothing a bit of bacta won't heal. Come on.'

She took one more moment to inspect him and finally gave him a short nod.

'Okay, let's go. Chor'datta, hey, get up.'

'She's in shock,' the stranger declared as Marla rushed towards the Twi'lek.

'Come on, get up. We'll be out of here in no time.'

There was no indication that Chor'datta heard her. Marla sighed, reached out and grabbed the Twi'lek by the arm, dragging her to her feet, 'You'll be fine,' she murmured, pulling her towards the exit.

They stopped in front of the mysterious new guy. He didn't say anything, yet the heaviness of his stare and a growing feeling of guilt in Marla's chest made her look away.

She took a deep breath and balled her hands into a fist.

It wasn't her fucking fault. This had to be done.

Then why do you feel so guilty?

'Well, so much for subtlety,' the man's bitter voice sucked her back into reality. 'Go ahead, do your thing,' he sighed, looking at the explosives stacked in the corner.

'What do we do about the civilians?' she asked, her voice much less confident than she intended. Not wanting to waste time, she started making her way across the room and preparing the charges to be planted.

'When did you start caring?'

She threw him an irritated look over her shoulder, not bothering to respond.

'With the emergency protocols in place, the whole facility is on lockdown. The civilians would be all gathered in the main production hall. If we managed to get there, we could let them out and leave through the northern exit.'

'How likely are we to get everyone out before getting caught by more troopers?'

'Do I look like a tactical droid? I don't know. There's a chance we get everyone out safely, and there's also a chance we get blasted before we even reach the production hall.'

'Sounds great. Travner?' Marla sent the man a quick inquiring look. He nodded, grabbing a rifle with his good hand. She briefly glanced at Chor'datta, but the Twi'lek was still not responsive. 'Good,' Marla said, setting the remote activation on charges and standing up. 'Let's go.'

The stranger was already peering out into the corridor to ensure they were free to go.

'You. Got a name?'

The man turned around to her, a trace of amusement in his features.

'Captain Willix. You?'

'Lieutenant Reid. These are privates Travner and Chor'datta.'

The Captain nodded in their general direction and returned to scanning the area. Then, with a quick gesture, he signalled them to follow, and Marla briefly considered arguing with him for assuming command - but she decided against it, knowing full well he had a better understanding of the factory's layout.

The main factory hall was located at the far end of the building. The heavily armoured doors were locked - luckily, the Captain seemed to know his way around the factory's security ('That's why you gather intel before coming in guns a-blazing'), so they were able to break in without further noise.

The hall was vast and dimly lit. In the centre, there were numerous rows of production belts, each constructing different weapon parts. Throughout the room, they could see several separate workstations; some of them covered with stacks of blueprints, others littered with random tools and odd-looking appliances. There were also some bins filled with discarded materials and parts in the back.

Most workers stayed exactly where they were when the alarm started; some still held their tools, even though the production belts had stopped. They were clearly very different ages, some probably not old enough to order a drink in a bar. Most of them were either human or Dug, but you could spot an occasional Gran or a Rodian.

One thing they did have in common was the terrified looks on their faces. As soon as they entered, Marla felt the weight of roughly two hundred eyes staring at them with apprehension and anticipation. She quickly realised she had no idea what to say or how to get them to move.

'All right, everyone,' the Captain interrupted the unbearable silence. 'This place will soon be blown to pieces. We're gonna get you to safety, but you must follow our lead and stay low.'

Not a single person stood up, the only sign of them understanding the Captain's words being a couple of hesitant looks thrown between some of the workers. Silence blanketed over the hall.

'Why?' they finally heard a low, hesitant voice from the back of the hall. 'Why are you doing this?'

The Captain looked as if he were about to say something, but then just sighed, rubbing his forehead. He then turned to Marla.

She felt her whole face tensing up, suddenly lost for words. Her ears were echoing with Saw's fiery speeches, all of them at once, suddenly so meaningless and empty. Somehow, she doubted these people would care about the Rebellion, the cause, the war. They were doing what they could to survive, to protect their families, even if it meant supporting the Empire.

'We need to go, now,' the Captain finally said, his voice conveying urgency and determination.

Marla didn't know if it was his confidence or the workers finally realising they had no other choice, but one by one, the people started getting up and hesitantly heading their way. The silence turned into the sound of dozens of shuffling feet, low murmurs, and a singular, faint sob. Reluctant as they were, they seemed to understand the gravity of the situation, and soon enough, they were ready.

Marla shot a quick glance at the Captain, who responded with a nod. One last look at all the people gathered around them, and then she started making her way out the huge reinforced doors to scout ahead and ensure a safe passage.

Marla barely remembered anything from the events that followed. There were the brightly lit corridors, there was a blaster in her hand as she carefully led the way, and there was one security guard that fell to the ground before he could see her. There were the open doors and the sound of dozens of people rushing outside. There was rain, once again tapping on her skin, briefly making her feel as if she had never gone inside, as if the past hour had never happened.

And then, there was a blast of the explosion behind them, the entire structure collapsing with a loud whimper. Most of the workers have already dispersed in the forest, but you could still hear some distant voices, now filled with dread and sorrow.

For a moment, the four Rebels stood in silence. Marla felt nothing. The sudden lack of urgency left a hole she wasn't yet ready to fill, afraid of what her own brain would conjure up as a response to what had just happened. The cold rain was almost calming, clearing her face of ash and sweat, making her vision blurry and filling her ears with a steady rhythm.

As the minutes went by, she saw Travner sitting down on a nearby tree trunk, inspecting his injured arm as if he had just noticed the wound. Soon after, Chor'datta bent over by a nearby rock and began vomiting profusely, her entire body shaking. The Captain stepped to the side, hunched over his comlink, emphatically explaining something to whoever was on the other side.

Marla was still absentmindedly admiring the cloud of dust dancing in the air when they heard footsteps. She immediately reached for her blaster, seeing in the corner of her eye that the Captain was already pointing his own gun at the source of the sound.

'Took you a while. I was just about to send in the second team,' Saw's raspy voice reached them before he appeared from behind a small hill, together with a small group of Partisans.

He took Marla by surprise, even though they were supposed to meet in this exact spot. Gradually recovering from numbness, she inspected his face. He was projecting coolness and confidence. No trace of hesitation, no questioning, no 'good job for saving these civilians'; no 'you were right, that was a good call'. As if they hadn't almost majorly fucked up.

It didn't take much for her to start feeling again, and when that happened, it was as if the floodgates opened. Everything came back to her with a renewed intensity, like a blow to the stomach that made her sick and dizzy with the sudden shift.

'You sick fuck,' she spewed out, lowering her blaster and clenching her fists instead. 'You sadistic, two-faced bastard.'

Her voice came out much shakier than she wanted it to, louder and louder with each word.

Saw's face stiffened, his eyes piercing her intensely, 'I saw you decided to disobey your orders. You're lucky you managed to carry out the mission, but you could have compromised the entire operation. I will not have you go rogue like this again,' he paused, raising one of his eyebrows. His next words were much quieter, calculated, meant to hit where he knew it would hurt most. 'I should have known you were too soft for this.'

That was it. Her mind went completely blank as she charged forward, fists ready for impact. It took several of Saw's men to restrain her.

He laughed sharply, the mockery ringing in her ears.

'You're acting like a child. You're angry, I get it, but stop making a fool out of yourself. You can do better than this.'

Marla attempted to free herself again, fueled by a newfound wave of ferocity. Unsuccessful, she gritted her teeth in anger and frustration.

'You're a good soldier, Marla. You just still have a lot to learn. One day you will understand why we sometimes need to make difficult choices.'

'I have nothing to learn from you,' she hissed.

Saw paused. The contrast between the two figures was almost comical - he was standing silent, proud and confident in his stillness, while Marla struggled to catch a breath, her face red and contorted with anger.

It took a moment before Saw spoke again.

'Very well. I can see I was wrong about you. Goodbye, then. I hope one day you will come to your senses.'

For a moment, he just stared at her, carefully inspecting her face. Finally, visibly disappointed, he shifted his gaze to Chor'datta and Travner, anticipating a declaration - but they weren't even looking at him, their faces painted with resignation and surrender.

After a long moment of silence, Saw nodded slowly and let out a short sigh.

He waited another minute before signalling his men to release Marla. She stumbled and briefly considered resuming the charge, but the urge to get as far away from him as soon as possible was stronger. She resorted to sending him one last hateful look and then stepped back and turned around. Behind her, she could hear the Partisans retreating back into the forest.

Once again, it was just the four of them. Her companions were standing to the side, eyeing her carefully as she steadied her breath, the silence suddenly heavy and uncomfortable. It felt like the world stilled around them.

'I'm done,' murmured Travner finally. 'This is not what I signed up for. I'm going back to Coruscant.'

'I'm done, too,' echoed Chor'datta, her voice still shaky but determined.

Marla nodded silently, staring down at the mud beneath her boots. She was drenched, but the coldness of the rain was somewhat grounding, helping her disconnect from the guilt and the anger. It felt almost calming, watching the raindrops disturb the stillness of the ground, listening to the rhythmic tapping on the rocks.

'What about you?' the Captain's voice reminded her of his presence.

She slowly raised her head as if awoken from a deep slumber. Yeah, what about her? She realised she was on her own for the first time in months, with no one to put a gun in her hand and direct her to the next battlefield.

The only thing she knew for sure was that she was not done.

'I guess I'll find another way to be useful,' Reluctantly, Marla decided to meet the Captain's gaze.

Perhaps it was the exhaustion, both physical and mental, but she suddenly no longer cared about feigning confidence. When she slowly raised her head, everything was painted in her eyes: all the tiredness, resignation and doubt.

Looking up at the Captain for the first time in a while, she noticed his demeanour altered as well. He was still a bit tense and somehow detached, but there was something kinder, something softer in his eyes.

'You're a pretty decent shot, you know?' he noted rather laconically. A small, slightly cocky smile crept onto Marla's face.

'Oh, that was nothing. Wait till you see me pilot an X-wing.'

He returned the smile. Marla noted this was the first time his expression didn't seem carefully calculated.

'I would like to,' he said after a moment, quieter and softer. 'And I'm fairly sure we could find a place for you in the Rebellion. If you want to.'

She gave a short laugh. In response, the Captain cocked one of his eyebrows, no sign of amusement on his face.

'Oh, you're not joking. Listen, I just got out of one cult. I think I'm fine for a while.'

'So what's your plan then?'

Marla furrowed her brows, all the amusement leaving her, 'That's... I'll figure it out.'

'You don't have to figure it out on your own. We don't exactly sign any contracts; you can leave when you please. But if you really want to be useful, this would be a pretty good starting point.'

She thought about that for a second. Standing against the Empire alone, albeit poetic, wasn't exactly practical. The truth was, she could do much more if she was part of something bigger and more organised.

'Do you really think they will have me?'

'We don't really organise castings. It's the Rebellion, not the Red Guard. If you can hold a blaster straight - and I believe I saw you do that - you will do just fine. If not, we sign you up for kitchen duty. We don't really have the luxury of being picky.'

'You're really selling it well. I'm not surprised you're so desperate for people if you're the one in charge of recruiting.'

He let out a short laugh.

'I don't really do this too often,' Was that a trace of embarrassment she heard in his voice? She couldn't really tell for sure.

'Well, then I'm that much more honoured, Captain Willix,' she teased him. 'Okay, fuck it, why not?'

He nodded slowly, a small grin not leaving his face.

'Good choice. By the way,' he paused for a moment as if to consider something, 'it's Captain Andor. Since it seems we'll be working together from now on.'

'Oh. Well, I'm still Lieutenant Reid. Marla,' Captain Andor nodded at her again. 'So, what happens now? I suppose you have a ride off this rock?'

'That depends,' he smirked. 'How do you feel about stealing some TIE fighters?'

**A/N: **Hope you liked it!

This might be long-ish. I'm hoping to post weekly, but I can't promise.

I did my best to scan this for mistakes, but 1) English is not my first language and 2) I don't know anyone who could proofread this, so I can't promise all of it will make sense. Do let me know if you spot something silly.

I am equal parts terrified and excited. Also, I know the summary sucks - that was probably the hardest thing to write, and I'll be really surprised if that encourages anyone to read this. Either way, I had a blast. I forgot how much fun this is.

(Are you as hyped for the show as I am?)

#cassian andor x original female character #cassian andor #star wars #star wars fanfiction #fanfic

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bengiyo · 2 years

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I love your commentary on every show you watch! I have started watching several shows because of it :) I have a question: how do you handle a show not going the way you anticipated? How can one react to it and not be swept away by the online fandom breaking down? (It's ok if you don't have any answers, it was just something I have been thinking about after being a mostly a bystander in fandom for several years. I hope you are having a nice day 😊

Thank you for taking the time to read my silly little thoughts. Sometimes a show brings out a lot of big ideas in me, and sometimes I'm just giggling at little stuff. You can tell when I'm tired and watching a show, because my commentary might be a bit pat.

I think the healthiest way to deal with a show not going the way I anticipated is to question my base assumptions in the first place. I ask if the show ever promised me something I was hoping for, and then I'll ask why they chose to go some other way with it.

I think the most recent example of me breaking with the primary online reaction was with I Promised You the Moon. I understood that Oh-aew and Teh were not a perfect couple, and that Teh's fundamental insecurity was an intrinsic part of his character. I also appreciated a story about a couple that was always going to struggle. So, when I see fans deeply upset by the drama that unfolded there, I appreciate that they're connecting with the characters and aching with and for them. I focus my feelings on what's next, and hope that those fans can see the mistakes Oh and Teh made, and hopefully avoid them or manage them more effectively in their own romantic endeavors.

I think it's also important to build my own fandom niche of perspectives you can appreciate and enjoy. I think the KP fandom is too broad to reasonably be part of the entirety of it. It's the same with big fandoms like superheroes, Star Wars, Star Trek, etc. They're too old and too popular for me to allow mass frustration or mass praise to color my experience too much, because I don't know exactly where everyone is coming from. I interact with fans who are vibing the same way I am, and avoid talking about things I know I'm not vibing about with fans. This happens with people I've known for years. Someone who is ride-or-die with me on one show may have a hard line about another show that isn't a line for me.

Right now we're seeing some of that with The Eclipse and Love in the Air. There are a few distinct approaches to those shows that will inherently color the viewing experience. With the Eclipse, I find that one must engage directly with the politics of the show to appreciate the relationships because these characters represent much of the political action happening in youth protest culture in Thailand.

With Love in the Air, I've approached the show as work from a survivor and a kinkster who is working through things in her writing. It allows me some emotional distance, and so I treat her characters like I might a stage play rather than real people; they are meant to fill a thematic role in the conversation being had. So, I think it's okay to reject the core idea that "people who have built up walls after trauma need someone to break them out of it" as well as the idea that "good relationships can have bad/terrible starts."

For me, I think I judge a work based on its execution of its core premise. I don't ask romcoms to be super serious, and I don't ask psychological horror to be slapstick. So, if a show is frustrating me, it's usually because of genre-blending not going well, or some latent cultural theme I'm not fully connecting to going over my head. When that happens I'll do some reading about what the intent may have been, or just politely drop the show. There's enough entertainment that I won't let a few disappointing shows define my experience online.

Also, the filter button is strong. I will not watch TharnType for a variety of reasons, and so I filter it. I have never once said that I think TharnType is bad. I just know it isn't for me. Being able to look at something a lot of people are saying is really good or really bad and saying, "Ah, I don't think that's for me," and then going about your life is extremely liberating as a fan. I don't need to moralize my tastes.

Thank you for your question. It gave me a bit to think about, and I am glad I took the time to write out vaguely how I engage with fandom.

#answered #fandom life #mynameisnotthepoint

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lunarmote · 1 year

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Why you should watch “extreme” films

(image from Enter the Void, Gaspar Noé)

I would consider myself a pretty open person when it comes to viewing art. I try to be aware of the expectations and lenses through which I view pieces and let go of what a good piece of art “should” be like. This does not mean I like everything I see. It does mean that I usually do not turn down a chance to watch a movie because it has a strange premise/storytelling method/genre.

In discussions with people about films, I find quite often that I will suggest a piece of media which has gore, nudity, or a controversial theme as a component, and have it immediately be rejected or dismissed on the basis of that. I have never really understood this attitude since the moment I decided to acclimate myself to film culture because of the idea that I can’t know my true preferences unless I give the vast majority of films a try.

This holds for nudity, overt sexual content, gore, violence, and “dark themes” including: themes of mental health, films depicting depravity and paraphilia, rape, suicide, ambiguous endings where nobody wins, etc.

Nudity

Let’s start with nudity because it’s the lowest-hanging fruit. It’s old news that films that offend typical American sensibilities are a bit different from films that offend (e.g. French) sensibilities. For some reason a lot of international films with uncensored body parts appearing on screen, make the fact that they show on screen the one talking point. (Ironically, in the 3 months that I had Netflix I couldn’t help but notice almost every episode of some popular show, including Black Mirror, had to have a heavily implied sex scene.)

What’s stranger is that nude is associated with erotic. If the director is not particularly well-liked, the film is charged as “exploitative,” e.g. exploiting the female body for the male gaze. I think the degree to which a film is exploitative is highly depend on context and execution, not on whether it has unclothed bodies per se.

The response is often some kind of squeamish arousal.

Gore and violence

Not much to say about violence for now; there are a ton of debates already on whether anti-war films can truly be anti-war films.

Dark themes

For this section I do have a director in mind and that’s Darren Aronofsky, the director of Requiem for a Dream and Black Swan. I was asking myself why Aronofsky is so successful (other than him being a masterful storyteller), and thought it was because of his mastery of visual storytelling. Horror seems to be excusable when it is accompanied by brilliant cinematography, when the sound-mixing is top notch, when there is enough exposition to make you sympathize with the character’s moral failings.

Anything else, which includes:

Movies with a shitty character

Movies where a character’s backstory apparently doesn’t justify their actions

Movies in which a “bad” character does not receive their expected comeuppance

Movies where you don’t know enough about the characters to revel in their payoff or their victimization or revenge (see Michael Haneke’s Funny Games for a deconstruction of this)

...are not seen as redeeming themselves of their dark subject matter. Quotidian grittiness is not appreciated and is seen as null, pointless, exploitative (violence must serve an end, otherwise it is exploitative — I actually agree with this, but probably not for the most obvious reason).

Bizarre, “weird” stuff

The strangest category for me to write about. My two examples are Jumbo and Titane, which both contain objectophilia. The same thing about these movies is that the fact that they contain something is distinct grounds for their rejection as unserious or too weird to be worth watching. You go into My Strange Addiction with the preconceived notion that everything featured on the show is a strange addiction; same for these movies. I think this kind of thinking can lock us in. Maybe I’m different in that I’m curious about everything and my immediate thought on something like Jumbo is “How would that even work? I want to find out.”

The expectations we have for films

Here’s the thing I find confusing about our attitudes towards films. It’s absurd to me that we have certain subject matters and content we deem as “extreme” simply because of a tradition of not seeing them on the big screen, while in real life they are incredibly common and justified without effort.

Nudity. Changing into and out of your pajamas every day. Not erotic. When nudity is shown on-film, it automatically attracts either positive or negative attention; rarely is nudity allowed to just be.

Long takes where a character sits in an environment and does nothing. (I wrote about this in my post on Sofia Coppola’s Somewhere). Incredibly common. Charged to death of “pacing issues” when put in films.

Senseless violence and death. Michael Haneke’s oeuvre centers around this, setting up a fake hostage thriller which the viewer expects to go one way and make it completely frustrating and anti-thriller-like to watch. It’s frustrating because the killers never receive their comeuppance. And you never even learn anything about the killers anyway so you don’t get the thrill you expect.

What does this say about our relationship with media if it’s supposed to be a creative, escapist force, when in fact, a lot of us expect it to conform. To a series of beats?

#gaspar noe #enter the void #art analysis #opinion #aesthetics #michael haneke

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ecargmura · 11 months

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A Magic Steeped In Poison - Book Review

AAPI heritage month already passed, but I’ll be reviewing a book written by an Asian author! Well, I chose to read this book not because of the special month, but because I wanted to read more books written by Asian and Asian American authors. I think my fondness for Asian authors stemmed from me liking manga and also Tablo’s Pieces of You.

I found this book when I was book shopping in Walmart. Yes, I shop for books at Walmart. I held off from reading it for a while since I had other books to read. When I finally got to it, I was excited.

Fortunately, the premise of the book is good. Magical tea magic with Chinese mythology? How unique! I am an avid tea drinker, so I was immersed in the world Judy Lin created with tea magic having the power to do anything from discerning truth from lies, peering into the future, etc. It felt like I was a Shennong-shi in this alternate reality of China.

The main character Zhang Ning wants to find a cure for her poisoned sister, so she decides to head to the capital where they are holding a tournament for tea magic apprentices, shennong-tu, in order to become acknowledged by the Princess. However, the catch is that she’s actually not a true apprentice and that she’s only taking her sister’s place because competing is the only choice she has. However, she still has a vast knowledge of tea magic and capable, which is why she’s still able to survive in the tournament.

What I love most about this book other than its premise is Lin’s detailed writing. She is very detailed when describing things and it helps me paint a visual picture of what the world, food, characters, and tea all look like. Her flowery descriptives are amazing to read. Despite her flowery words, I think my favorite portion of the story was when Ning was healing Ruyi, the princess’s handmaiden. Inside Ruyi’s body contained a very grotesque three-headed snake that could be or could not be a spirit. The way Lin described how it looks and its movements really grossed me out. I commend Lin for being able to write beautifully.

While the premise and writing style are strong, it doesn’t mean it’s perfect. There are many flaws in the overall writing execution. The story starts off with Ning on her way to the capital. I sort of wished the story started a bit before her travels, precisely, the moment she had realized she had poisoned her sister Shu. All the moments of Ning mentioning she had poisoned her did not compel me as much since it was more “told” than “shown”.

The tournament was a bit of a miss for me. Tournaments story arcs in general can be a hit or miss. Especially in manga, they’re either a hit or a miss, depending on the execution as they can be a rinse and repeat of the same thing but written by different authors. How was this tournament arc? It was a bit of a slog to read, honestly. I think what it lacked was more distinctive characters? Like, I wanted to see a rival for Ning or someone who’s always one step ahead of her and pushes Ning to her upmost potential. It was interesting, but given that 90% of the story focused on this one tournament felt like a bit of a let down. However, I did like the sudden twist at the end of it.

The characters that aren’t Ning are quite interesting. Lian’s sassy; she’s my favorite. Princess Zhen has something going on with her handmaiden Ruyi and I love it. Kang’s a bit iffy for me. I do like how they’re all essential for Ning to develop and none of them seem out of place or just there for a need of a minor character.

The ending of the story definitely shows the need for a continuation. There is a sequel, A Venom Dark and Sweet. I’ll try to buy it when I can after I take a break. While I want to read it, I’m dreading over the fact that the last few chapters was building up for a revolution arc. In all honesty, I dislike revolution arcs. I just feel like they’re the same thing. MC gets dragged into revolution, teams up with people to stop the big bad, big bad turns out to not be the big bad and there’s an even bigger bad behind the big bad, and biggest bad gets destroyed and everyone lives happily ever after. I think reading Mockingjay made me dislike revolution arcs. I just hope this one won’t be rushed like how that book kind of was.

Overall, I give this book a 4/5. I think it’s a perfect representation of the capabilities of what Asian-American authors can do! The book industry is rough for us Asians and I’ll support them by reading more AAPI books! If possible, give me a recommendation! Also, let me know your thoughts on this book if you have read it!

#a magic steeped in poison #Judy I. Lin #The Book of Tea #duology #review #book review #YA books #asian authors #asian American authors #ecargmura #arum journal

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frauleinandry · 1 year

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finally finished engage. it was... certainly a game alright. what it did well, it did well, but when it did things badly, it did them badly, and unfortunately, the latter overshadows the former.

tl;dr I’d give it a 6.5/10 overall. the gameplay was solid but had a couple of really irritating aspects that dragged my overall experience down, and the less said about the story, the better.

so, let’s start with the plot, since that’s the worst thing. it’s... bad. very bad. and no, it’s not bad because it’s not a bleak tragedy filled with morally grey characters and interesting ethical conundrums. after three houses (which I love btw), I wanted a stupid, light-hearted game ala awakening. engage’s story also isn’t bad because it was made to be child friendly (although I do find that a dubious decision, given how much the game caters to old-school FE fans, and the typical themes that normally appear in fire emblem games). steven universe is a great example of a show that’s child friendly, yet still tackles some dark content. in fact, while I admit I only watched the first season, she-ra is also a good example of children’s media that handles very similar themes to engage.

no. engage’s story sucks purely because it’s poorly executed. everything interesting about alear is dropped after like 3 chapters, the pacing is god-awful, none of the lore is utilised to its full potential, the characterisation is all over the place (*cough* zephia *cough*), and the dissonance between the genuinely awful stuff happening (like the near genocide of elusia) and the cartoonish dialogue and characterisation is jarring. for scenes like, say, lumera’s death, the game is trying to make me feel things, but it doesn’t, because there’s absolutely no substance or development behind anything. it’s like IS tried to make a family-friendly story without actually understanding how to do that, and the result is a hot mess.

like. there is a couple of parts that did stand out, such as alear being resurrected as a corrupted, the time travel stuff, sombron’s past, and the way lumera and alear’s adoptive relationship is treated like it’s just as important (if not even more so) than alear’s blood family. most of those elements are completely glossed over though except for the adoptive family stuff (which is one thing I think engage’s story actually gets right). like, sombron’s whole deal with him not caring about elyos because it’s not his homeworld is really interesting! why was it just an off-handed comment in the last chapter instead of a running theme of his character?!

ultimately, I think engage’s story would be significantly better if the game wasn’t trying to be serious. the premise is dumb!! let the game be silly! ditch the war stuff (initially, anyway), and just have it be alear’s goofy misadventures travelling through the kingdoms collecting rings. let ivy and her retainers essentially be team rocket. let the cutscenes be hammy. let lumera be mission control, and actually develop her relationship with amnesiac!alear. then, at around the midpoint of the game, introduce the four hounds, and have them be the knights of cerebus. alear’s almost collected all the rings, but then the hounds take over from ivy (who bore no genuine ill-will towards alear), and lure them into a lethal trap. they take most of the emblems, and lumera sacrifices herself to save the main character.

*takes a deep breath in* okay, now that that ramble is done with, let’s move on to the characters. they’re... not great, either. most of them are just one trope, and that’s it? sure, fire emblem casts are always going to be a bit tropey, but in engage, 95% of the playable cast has one gimmick which completely defines their every interaction. like, the cast of awakening gets accused of this same thing, but every character also has a bit of something else to them. in engage though, outside of celine, what you see is what you get. like, none of the supports were offensive or anything, and a few were cute/funny, but nearly all of them had no substance. it also really doesn’t help that there’s no paired ending (and ergo no reason to get A-supports), and support grinding in this game is dreadful.

that’s a perfect segway to the next segment - the gameplay. while it’s polished, and there are a lot of things it does really well, it’s got a couple of major flaws which makes engage more of a birthright than it is a conquest. for one, grinding anything, in general, is awful. the game is clearly catered for either iron man runs or for the players to ditch units as they get better ones. while this is subjective, speaking as someone who likes to use all the units they can on a first playthrough to get supports/etc, keeping all my units usable was a pain in the goddamn ass. who on earth thought basing the skirmishes on your highest-level units was a good idea?! the only way to level up weaker units is via the arena, which has very limited uses. the same issues pop up with getting money/supports - since the former requires you to do skirmishes which you can’t complete with your weaker units, it ends up with you getting over levelled (and who wants that?). support points only building from adjacent units was also an awful decision - it was fine in the GBA games when each character could literally only max one support each, but not in a modern title (especially given how bland the cast is - they need all the screentime they can get).

still, outside of that, most of it is pretty good! I was worried the emblems were going to completely destroy the difficulty, but they were balanced perfectly. enough to turn the tides in your favour, but not enough to make everything a cakewalk. emblem ike, lyn, and byleth were probably my MVPS - tanks are a rare luxury in such a player-phase-focused game, and byleth’s utility is just too good. speaking of difficulty, I’ve got to say, this was the first FE game I’ve found genuinely challenging in a while, which is great! i love three houses, but it’s a bit of a cakewalk, especially on a new game plus. engage though consistently kept me on my toes. the map designs were pretty good on the whole too - while they weren’t quite conquest tier, they’re some of the best in the franchise. I admit I still dislike the character art style, but the animations were a huge improvement compared to prior games. the map visuals were neat too - clear, concise, and with none of the murkiness that plagued the 3DS games/three houses.

I do have a couple of other pain points though. I found the somniel infinitely more tedious than the monastery - the rewards are worse, and the way you need to go to it after every map if you want to maximise its potential is a pain in the ass. at least you only really need to visit garreg mach once per month. tbh I think the base camp in three hopes actually did things best - good rewards, a simple layout, and bonus worldbuilding/character stuff that was completely optional. sommie is great though - he’s the best mascot character I’ve seen in a looooooooong time. one of the other dampeners was how player-phase-centric it was. this is purely subjective, but given how many reinforcements appear in this game, I wish there were more than two useful tanks. finally, I think the soundtrack was very generic by fire emblem standards. the music is normally brilliant, but I can’t think of a single song that stuck with me.

#fire emblem #fire emblem engage spoilers/#review tag

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