@madcatdaderpydrawer-blog I have an animation idea. Not that I'm very good at animation but I can't stop imagining this whenever I hear this section of this song.
- lunar first online. Happy alongside Eclipse.
I was your baby. Your first born
- Lunar with moon in back ground.
The hot girl in your comp sci class
- Lunar getting suspicious of eclipse. Moon whispering lies.
And I was Darwin's prep school dream
- lunar helps defeat Eclipse
Bred born and raised to kick your ass
- Lunar living a happy life with Sun Moon and Monty. Center stage was happy face.
I fell for circuit boards. Rocket ships. Pictures of the stars
- Moon traps lunar
If you could only be what you pretend you are
- lunar reaching out for Moon.
When I said take me to the moon. I never meant take me alone
- lunar drowning in lava.
I thought if mankind toured the sky. It meant all of us could go
- lunar latches on to Monty's hand. Close up of him crying.
But I don't want to see the stars if they're just. One more piece of land for you to colonize.
-Monty smacks lunar. Downloading him.
For us to turn to sand
- Monty sun and Moon popping up with evil faces.
Because we're so fucking mean. We're so elitist. We're as fucked as any church
- lunar going through a bunch of bad shit.
And this bullshit west coast dogma. Has a higher fucking net worth
- Lunar going into the bedroom and spotting the star.
I bit the apple 'cuz I loved you
- lunar lifting up the star.
And why would you lie
- Luna gets angry sad with star in hand.
And then I realized. You're just as naive as I am
- either Moon or Monty flashback saying this.
You're so traumatized it makes me wanna cry
- lunar yells at Moon Monty and sun. Zoom out to room.
You dumb bitch
- Lunar says these while flashbacks of good times. Degrading into what actually happened.
I loved you. I loved you. I loved you it's true
- says this as Traveler realizing that there are horrible.
I wanted to be you. And do what you do
- lunar looks at Sun Moon and Monty while cry screaming.
I lived here. I loved here. I bought it it's true
- Lunar says the first two lines and then activates the star. Causing everything to be sucked in like a black hole. Monty Sun and moon either running towards him or running away.
I'm so embarrassed. I feel abused. I feel so used. I feel so used
- asks the star this before thrusting it into his chest.
Take me to the moon
- wakes up in a black void of a reset world. Looking around before starting to cry uncontrollably with the sob in song.
Because I feel so used. I feel so used
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Bianca and Nico used to switch clothes as kids because Bianca liked pants when she was playing (no scuffed knees!) and Nico liked twirling around and making the skirt swish swish.
Hazel looking through old photos of Nico and Bianca that Hades saved, then popping off to the nearest shop to put something together, showing up hours later in front of the Hades cabin in a pressed suit that's just a little on the big side. Her hair is slicked back into a low bun, scrunchie making some threats beneath her hat.
Nico leans against the doorframe. "You look interesting."
She hands him a dress bag. "Get dressed, doll. I'm taking you out on the town."
With an amused grin, he takes the bag. "Does this surprise come with the right jewelry?" He gestures to his hole-worn, bedhead, sleepless form. "A girl's gotta look right in mixed company, you know."
She snorts and pulls out a silk bag. "Would I ever do you wrong, kitten?"
He rolls his eyes but disappears back into the dark of the cabin. It's a few minutes before he remerges, shadowy tendrils clingy to his neck as the wisp and weave his hair into a soft braid. Most of them dispel away in the low light of the slowly setting sun.
He spins around and pulls his hair to the side. Pulling the necklace out, she clips it around his neck. The pearls look nice against his skin. His thumb slides against one.
"Oh, they're real," he murmurs.
"Of course they're real!" She looped their arms together. "I'd never let my best filly hop around with fakes." He rolled his eyes. "I'm not a crumb, Nico." She flicked his cheek. Then tugged him off to the nearest shadow. "Now let's shake a leg and go have a bang!"
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I was joking a while back that the actor they have playing KDJ for the orv movie was too handsome for him and a friend who's read orv was like "KDJ is actually secretly attractive!!" And I just felt my soul leave my body right then
SIGHS...
Okay. Buckle in. I'm gonna finally actually address and explain and theorize about this whole...thing.
I'm not gonna cite any exact chapters cause it's like 11:30 and I've got an 8 hour drive in the morning but I'll at least make an approximate reference to where certain things are mentioned. Also, this post is just my personal interpretation for a good bit of it, but it's an interpretation I feel very solid about, so do with that what you will. Moving on to the meat of things:
There is one (1) instance in the web novel that I know of which describes specific features of Kim Dokja (especially ones other people notice). This takes place when members of KimCom are trying to make Kim Dokja presentable to give his speech at the Industrial Complex (after it's been plopped down on Earth). This is when they start really paying attention and focusing on Kim Dokja's appearance since they're putting makeup on him; I still don't think they can interpret his whole face, but they can accurately pick out and retain more features than usual. If I remember correctly they reference him having long eyelashes, smooth skin, and soft hair. These features can be viewed as (stereotypically) attractive.
Certain parts of the fandom have taken this scene and run with it at a very surface level, without realizing (or without acknowledging at the very least) that this scene is not about how Kim Dokja looks. This is, in part, due to not realizing or acknowledging why Kim Dokja's face is "censored" in the first place, and what that censoring actually means. I think it's also possible that some people are assuming the censorship works like a physical phenomena rather than an altered perception.
I'll address that last point first. The censorship of Kim Dokja's features is not something as simple as a physical phenomena. It's not a bar or scribble or mosaic over his face. If that were true it'd be very obvious to anyone looking at him that his face is hidden. But his face is not hidden to people. They can look at him and see a face. If they concentrate on his eyes, they can see where he's looking. They know when he's frowning or grinning. They see a face loud and clear. But what face are they seeing? Because it's not really his, whatever they're seeing.
No one quite agrees on what he really looks like. And if they try and think about what he looks like, they can't recall. Or if they do, it's vague, or different each time. We notice these little details throughout the series. Basically, Kim Dokja's face is cognitively obscured. Something - likely the Fourth Wall, though I can't recall if this is ever stated outright - is interfering with everyone's ability to perceive him properly. This culminated in him feeling off to others; and since they don't even realize this is happening, they surmise that he is "ugly."
Moving on to the other point about what the censorship means: To be blunt, the censorship of his face is an allegory for his disconnect from the "story" (aka: real life, and the real people at his side). The lifting - however slight - of this censorship represents him becoming more and more a part of the "story" (aka: less disconnected from the life he is living and the people at his side). The censorship's existence and lifting can represent other things - like dissociation or depersonalization or, if you want to get really meta, the fact that he is all of our faces at once - but that's how I'd sum up the main premise of it. (The Fourth Wall is a larger part of the dissociation allegory, but that's for another post).
So you see, them noticing his individual features isn't about the features. It's not about the features! It doesn't matter at all which features got listed. Because they could describe any features whatsoever and it would not change the entire point of the scene. Because the point isn't what he looks like. The point is that they can truly and clearly see these features. For the first time. They are seeing parts of him for the first time. Re-read that sentence multiple times, literally and metaphorically. What does it mean to see someone as they are?
This is an extremely significant turning point dressed up as a dress-up scene.
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P.S. / Additionally, I'm of the opinion that Kim Dokja is not handsome, and he is not ugly. He is not pretty, and he is not ghastly. Not attractive, nor unattractive. Kim Dokja isn't any of these things. More importantly, Kim Dokja can't be any of these things. The entire point of Kim Dokja is that you cannot pick him out of a crowd; he is the crowd. He's a reader. He's the reader. Why does he need to be handsome? Why must he be pretty? Why is him being attractive necessary or relevant? He doesn't, he doesn't, it's not. He is someone deeply deeply loved and irreplaceable to those around him, and someone who cannot even begin to recognize or accept that unless it's through a love letter masquerading as a story he can read. He is the crowd, a reader, the reader. He's you, he's me. He's every single one of us.
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I was thinking about how the run away with me au Robin and Steve "should we get divorced?" conversation comes about:
Theyre about 23 and Robin comes home in tears after another break up. The reason: Robin had asked her girlfriend of 8 months, Lorraine to move in with her and steve. Lorraine assumes this means steve is moving out and when Robin clarifys that no Steve is staying, he's an important part of her life theyre married for chists sake. Well Lorraine doesnt take that well, says she isnt going to spend her life playing second fiddle to Steve.
This isnt the first time a relationship had ended for either of them because a partner hadnt been able to accept that Steve and Robin were a package deal. Things had been especially rough for them romantically in the first couple years of their marriage. It wasnt until a particularly awful screaming match between Robin, Steve and Steves first real boyfriend, that they were able to admit their relationship was incredibly codependent and unhealthy. Steves boyfriend had been upset when Steve had cancelled on him for the 3rd time in a row because of a Robin Emergency™️ and decided to confront Robin about it while Steve was in class. Things escalated quickly when Steve came home early from class to find them arguing and immediately took Robins side. The argument and Steves relationship ended with a slammed door, a lot of tears and a new rift in Robin and Steves relationship.
It took a lot of long conversations with Carina and Marjorie, Steve working through his toxic masculinity enough to go see a therapist - He and Robin made a deal that theyd both go talk to someone about, you know almost dieing "do you think me being fucked up by what happened at starcourt makes me weak steve?" "No of course not!" "Well then why would it make you weak?" - and a summer spent apart (Robin taking an internship in rome to study latin) for them to sit down and have a long conversation about boundaries and ground rules for how they would navigate their relationship as well as dating in the future.
Steve and Robin agreed to both take a break from dating while they worked through their respective traumas, and figured out how to navigate their relationship in a healthy way. Things werent easy, the both of them occasionally backsliding into unhealthy behaviors, more than a few nights where one of them spent the night with Carina and Marjorie in order to have space from eachother. But eventually they get their shit figured out and decide to brave the world of dating again. Steve and Robin both have their share of flings and short lived relationships but nothing so far seemed to stick. That is until Robin met Lorraine.
Lorraine was funny, sweet and a little bitchy. They had immediately clicked after being introduced by some mutual friends from school. Robin really thought things with Lorraine were going to work out. Steve and Lorraine had gotten on like a house on fire, she had slipped into Robin and Steves dynamic easily, trading jokes and light hearted jabs, cooking breakfast together on days Lorraine would stay at their apartment. Robin had fallen hard and fast, she thought she had finally found someone who accepted that her and Steve were a package deal. So 8 months in when Lorraines lease was ending Robin (with agreement from steve) asked Lorraine to move in. Things don't go to plan. Robins dreams of a future with lorraine are shattered. She goes home broken hearted.
After Robin has cried herself out, her and steve cuddled together on the couch Steve is the one to broach the topic. Robin immediately bursts back into tears before he calms her back down again saying he doesnt want a divorce but he also doesnt want to hold Robin back, doesnt want to be the reason she cant find happiness. Robin replys by saying if anyone is holding the other back its obviously her, steve gave up everything to protect her afterall. Steve calls bullshit -years of therapy and he can finally say that word without cringing- says he would do it all again in a heartbeat, that she doesn't owe him anything. They stay up all night talking about it, about what the both of them want from their futures. Neither can see a future without the other. they're platonic life partners, one day they'll find their someones who can accept that and if not well, they'll always have eachother.
Of course they do find their someones in the form of a charming if infuriating metal head and a brilliant, sweet, and badass reporter. Through trial and error the four of them figure out how to navigate life together. They all live happy ever after.
Robin and Steve celebrate 30 years of marriage with divorce papers. They'll always love eachother but now they dont need a marriage to keep eachother safe. They dont need a marriage to stay as platonic life partners. They have eachother and they have Eddie and Nancy. They have everything they need.
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Lmk what you think! I'd love to have someone to scream with about this AU and bounce ideas off of :D
Tagging by request <3 @ramyayaya
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