#the shitposter goes on a tangent

[ashley-slashley]

tbh, the fetishization/sexualization of blonde women is really fucking bizarre and skin crawling. the tik tok user june rogers (they do drag as a 50s housewife), made a video months ago about the kinda history of the fetish of blondes. they pointed out that it could be rooted in some folklore, i don't recall where exactly, but western folklore, that blondes are inherently deviant, provocative, and hypersexual. and that in pretty much all art of cherubs or angels, they're all platinum blonde, which just makes this whole thing extremely creepy. now bring in how in a lot of movies we have the dumb blonde archetype, rather than being stupid, i've noticed a lot of blonde characters act more childlike than straight up stupid (there's a difference between the two concepts). now combine the hypersexual trait with the innocent trait, and being blonde. what does that get you? a naive, innocent, and childlike woman who is both a nymphomaniac and has absolutely no idea what sex is.

TL:DR: some smut authors fail to notice how unsettling writing a grown woman's room to look like a nursery is, while also failing to write any "innocent" readers to still function psychologically as a grown woman (just use Snow White as an influence ffs)

long analysis below:

i'm gonna take this to another level that applies to what i've seen in fanfiction (especially smut). a lot of fem "reader" characters all share similar characteristics:

long, blonde hair

pale

slim figure that looks like the "reader" would result in dying in childbirth, or the reader is severely malnourished

innocent

bedroom looks like an infant girl's nursery (pastel pinks, white teddy bears, bows/ribbons, lace, frills, and other things you would see at a baby shower or in a nursery) or the baby section of home goods

wardrobe includes just dresses, skirts, and lacy undergarments

has a childish attitude and way of life

i've already somewhat dissected the problematic history of the fetishization of blondes. likewise, the pale complexion falls under the "naive" and "innocent" categories. paleness can be associated with being pure and virginal, that includes light hair as well as a lack of melanin. the "reader"'s figure essentially being severely malnourished can be interpreted as looking like a victorian child - y'know, frail, skinny, easy to manipulate and overpower. the way she dresses is reminiscent of a little girl as well: frilly dresses, pattered skirts, bows, ribbons, lace, pastels, pinks and lavenders. onto her bedroom, you walk in and see the walls painted a pastel pink, decor white, soft, and littered with fantasy creatures (e.g. magical bears, unicorns, pegasuses, etc.). when i read a description like that, i think of a little girl and her nursery, not a grown woman and her bedroom. her attitude wraps all this up, she's spoiled, she's self centered, she has to have everything her way, she has no idea what sex is or what her sexual organs are. i get that this can be an escape for some women, but, to me, this is just really creepy if it's all sexualized. if i come off as a c*nservative, i'm sorry, and that's not at all how i meant for this analysis to be interpreted. i'm just stating my observations as a smut reader

#the shitposter goes on a tangent

[thebibliosphere]

What do you think Batman's coffee order is?

#batman shitpost #following this thought tangent to see where it goes

[d-dormant]

as much as i prefer the movie canon when it comes to maleficent and diaval meeting in the ruins, i find it kind of touching how in the novel she doesn't drive him out and instead just silently watches him preen and eat his corn right on the ground in front of her and eventually leave

#she treats him like a nature documentary and that's honestly so relatable of her #maleficent #maleval #diaval #also. tangent. in the novel she goes (as she looks at him): #'[diaval's] wings reminded her of the ones she had lost and she wished not for the first time that she had never allowed them to be taken' #the victumblaming! the self-hatred!!! i eat that shit up pl its so devastating how she believed that losing her wings was somehow her fault #anyway #maleficent films #maleficent x diaval #look mum i'm a content creator #shitposting

[leorathealien]

yama-chan? more like yama-san ahahaha because mountain

anyway get out of my house or i'll have to erase you from existence a third time and don't you dare bake any more cake

#see it's funny because (goes on a tangent about the history of the japanese language) #sims 4 #snowy escape #shitpost

[ghost-party]

I wrote these while substitute teaching. 😂 This is pretty much a shitpost, so please don’t take anything seriously. I definitely didn’t.

Eren: has a strong disdain for the current state of the educational system // always butts heads with admin // the loud teacher (when he’s quiet, be afraid) // will fight anyone who talks shit about his students // keeps extra hair ties in his desk

Armin: keeps the most meticulous notes and lesson plans // really puts his all into his classes // almost too passionate when it comes to public speaking, can sometimes get a little scary // has a classroom goldfish // most parents’ favorite

Jean: hates when students talk while he’s talking // the “hot” teacher, but he hates when his coworkers tease him for it // sarcastic, but he really does care // cries every year when his students graduate, but DON’T BRING IT UP

Connie: the goofball teacher // goes all out on spirit days and holidays, has a whole costume closet // his sub plans consist of watching movies // one of the biggest troublemakers in the faculty, absolutely will prank you

Marco: the sweetest overall, but he doesn’t let kids walk all over him // remembers students’ names and their likes/dislikes and extracurriculars years later // keeps small plants on his windowsill // Jean is his anger translator

Levi: the no-nonsense teacher // always trying to get his coworkers to clean the fucking teachers’ lounge // doesn’t give homework but expects work to get done during class // adopts a stray cat hanging around the staff parking lot

Erwin: the very professorial teacher // owns a ridiculous number of sweaters // always misplacing his reading glasses // teaches honors and AP classes // writes daily inspirational quotes on the board // can silence a room with a look

Hange: the “mad scientist” teacher // prioritizes students’ safety over their own // forever over-caffeinated // prone to rambling tangents // always prepared to go on a field trip // has a truly baffling organizational system, is never caught up

Miche: the laidback teacher // has the coolest ties, one for every occasion // kids call him “Mr. Z” // probably coaches a sport, maybe soccer // encourages good hygiene because teenagers because of his keen sense of smell

Moblit: anxious but highly organized // constant imposter syndrome, no matter how long he’s been doing this // has a hard time saying no when asked to help with after school activities // would do anything for his students // incredibly helpful

Nile: the grumpy teacher // NOT a morning person // never knows how to fix the printer, usually jams it // his pet peeve is texting during class // there’s a stick-figure drawing of him on a boys’ bathroom stall, probably with devil horns

Kenny: does not give a single fuck // smokes in his car during planning periods and lunch // seems like a total slacker but somehow stays on top of things // has to duck under doorways // keeps a swear jar on his desk, and it’s always full

Reiner: the cool teacher // big mental health advocate, always reminding students to take breaks and not stress // coaches a sport but also advises the writing club // a former jock with a sensitive side // always gets the most gifts

Bertholdt: the quiet teacher // very good at what he does, but public speaking makes him feel nauseated // keeps antacids in his desk // cozy sweater collector // tries to go to all his students’ sporting events and plays // never forgets lunch

Porco: doesn’t tolerate any kind of disrespect // overly competitive, even with students // acts tough but is actually great with kids // try to fight his students, and he’ll fight you in the parking lot (or at least try to) // keeps a comb in his desk

Zeke: the pretentious teacher // was (and still is) a hipster // strokes his beard when mulling over a question // sometimes sounds condescending even when he doesn’t mean to // stays up too late // please check his travel mug for whiskey

#attack on titan #aot #attack on titan headcanons #aot headcanons #eren jaeger #armin arlert #jean kirstein #connie springer #marco bodt #levi ackerman #erwin smith #hange zoe #miche zacharias #moblit berner #nile dok #kenny ackerman #reiner braun #bertholdt hoover #porco galliard #zeke jaeger

[vindickyoutive]

not even a shitpost but season 4 should have an episode with a similar format to a malcolm in the middle episode where when something insane happens, ryan turns to the camera & goes on a malcolm-like tangent about how fucking insane his life is.

#the boys #malcolm in the middle #ryan butcher #honestly it’d be such a funny way to pay homage #alternatively eric kripke u bastard make ryan turn break the fourth wall & call bullshit at every inconvenience #give that boy some personality

[soysaucevictim]

Had another silly tangent with the co-conspirator, stemming from him sending me this:

Me: i'm just thinking abt shit gymrat!virgil mighta sent to ro maybe a few years after the ckd dx when ro's got more of his shit together y'know since guy's on a low-sodium diet + has The Depression (and at that pt is able to shitpost abt it) Him: but sending it while roman is actively enjoying a grapefruit Me: granted… i'm stopping to think abt whether it'll fuck w/ ro's meds tho now i need to go look at that medications post to see if they say anything abt grapefruit interaction because gdi pharmacology is always fascinating olmesartan - looks like no bueno metformin - seems okay various diuretics - seems okay SSRIs - not a great idea adderall - more of an acidity issue right after than related to those pesky furanocoumarins so on safe side ro's probably not abt to be eating no grapefruit if anyone knowledgeable has anything to say abt it Him: Janus running into the room and ripping it out of his hand swallows the entire thing in one go to prevent him from whining Visible bulge in his throat as it goes down With roman drooling "that's hot."

#sanders sides #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #food/ #medication/ #(ckd referring to chronic kidney disease... which he got as a result of overtraining) #(among other things - he has some diet stipulations to go easy on his kidneys basically) #roceit #is a thing in this au

[wambsgansshoelaces]

hi! i’m the anon that called u numba one 🏆 just saw ur post about living with pcos and struggling with weight loss. i don’t have pcos, but i have endometriosis and a whole arsenal of ailments that would take forever to list. oh also im a wlw like u 😁i’m not the wisest person, but i will say that you have to be kind to yourself. even when you’re crying seven times in the doctors office. feel the disappointment, and the sadness, and know that it will not go on forever. sometimes being kind to yourself is allowing yourself to be sad without feeling weak for being sad. no one knows what’s going on in your mind but you, so let it flow freely. also you’re a fantastic writer,,, i literally have your notifs on and check your page everyday, and that’s coming from someone who’s been reading fanfiction for like 10 years. not many people can envision a scene so human and translate it into words as you do. your execution is flawless, but not clinical and robotic, it evokes warmth and real emotion. you give that freely to the general public of tumblr, and you should know we love you and your beautiful brain for it. i hope you find comfort in knowing other people like you are provided with a safe escape in your writing, if only for a moment. lord knows we do.

(ps, try intermittent fasting if you haven’t already ;))

(p.p.s. call me 🏆 anon )

anon will you give me a hug

I feel like you’re the older sibling I don’t actually have- tangent but my parents aren’t exactly the best people and I’m the eldest of all my siblings so you leaving this for me in my ask box genuinely made me cry. I’m so grateful that I finally have people who care and are so kind and thoughtful 🩷 I really will try and take your advice. It’s just that I’ve felt so upset and have had so much pent up depression that it’s just so difficult for me to not think I’m a horrible person just because I’m sad all the time if you know what I mean

and yes I’m wlw and still trying to come to terms with that yk? like I wish I could be loud and proud but I just can’t bc of what’s around me

and you have notifs on??? oh my god I’m so honored!!!! I need to stop shitposting… sorry for lol of the garbage you’ve seen 🏆…

what you’ve said about my writing is on god the nicest, most wonderful thing anyone’s ever said to or about me. you don’t understand what it means to me when you say my writing evokes emotion and makes you feel things. genuinely I have no words in response to that, I’m just so honored and just happy that you think so. coming from years of just a depressed state, I’d cling to any sort of media- tv shows, films, especially x reader fanfiction because it made it like I wasn’t actually suffering and that I have someone who loves me. I know nobody wants to read about this lol but genuinely (I’ve said that a million times already), genuinely, I could die tomorrow happy knowing that my work has made people feel better or made people just happy. I’m so, so, glad that my work is an escape for you. you’re always welcome on my blog, in my ask box, in my pms, whatever. I love you so so much 🫶🏽

(I’m really trying with food… my relationship is so unhealthy with it but I’ll let you know how it goes!)

#ask box convos #anon you made me cry #I literally love you so much #you don’t understand what this means to me #I love asks like these #you genuinely made my day

[cozymochi]

im so sorry people are being assholes in the comments of ur iz animatics :((( they bring such joy and are so well done!! forever grateful that you share you art <3 even if you decide to take them down i just wanted to let you know that you are appreciated <3<3<3 hoping your day goes well and you find small unexpected delights

I don’t plan on taking them down. That carnal part of me gets a lil’ joy when I still see nice comments anyway. It’s only been a year, but I still get comments! So that’s crazy.

BUT!!

Another fear I do have is the response if I do post again, and it’s completely different than what those 2.4k subs are expecting to see. I’ve already warned about it literally a year in advance, and then again very recently in multiple places. Idk why I SHOULD be uneased by it, but it’s not like IZ fans are quiet when it comes to their distaste when something changes. *cough.* It’s part of why I’ve distanced myself from that fandom (there’s a myriad of reasons but still).

Insanity incoming:

I don’t have immediate plans to make more animatics, they’re kind of long term thing to consider. Back when I used to make them I had NOTHING but free time and my biggest concern was feeding myself cuz my home environment was horrid and I had zero means of leaving since I lived in bum fuck nowhere! Since my last yt upload I moved out, was in a car wreck (not even 2 days in), my own car went through thousands of dollars in repairs, i got a job, went through a period where I worked nearly 100hrs for several months consecutively with hardly any breaks, and to think! It wasn’t and it’s still not sustainable. Things changed. And I do not want to go “home.” After being forced to visit family again a month ago I especially don’t want to go back.

The channel was literally a dumping ground. I got those 2k subs when I wasn’t posting for a year. So! You can imagine I might not be prioritizing a channel I only used as a dumping ground or in a state to make fully or even barely boarded videos and shitposts weekly or monthly. Idk what these people want from me schedule wise. I make $0 from it, and monetizing for a few cents isn’t worth it. I didn’t even get paid when I made thumbnails and assets for bigger channels lmfao. Yeah, I did do that. Wouldn’t know tho. Paid in “exposure” hurr hurr or “omg i need that money myself XDD cmon” whatever backwards excuse.

So what’s next in line but a bunch of strangers with fickle attention being passive aggressive and demanding I make more stuff when I say multiple times that I don’t intend to, and if I do (big if) it WON’T be what they came here for. They aren’t paying me. It’s not like I have a gajillion other things to be concerned about.

…Okay, that was a tangent.

Those few condescending comments make me just wanna outright cancel what iz stuff was left on the backburner. It was more like an indefinite hiatus until I can stomach finishing them. The files take up space anyway for the projects I’m actually interested in. Even if all of them are purely hypotheticals until I can get my focus together (which isn’t likely to happen anytime soon).

sorry about the TMI rant for a second but!! MAN!! It’s frustrating! If anything I could very well take them down. But, I won’t. Besides, for all I know some tiktok took some and it’s getting an exponentially higher amount of views anyway. I should at least keep mine…

It’s not like i don’t WANT to use it for actual new things, but the sheer pressure keeps me away. I get enough pressure to make animatics offline as it is. And if someone out there is gonna be all like “well who cares what those kids think” believe me, I get it and I promise don’t care. But at the same time it’s egghhhhhh. I delete the comments anyway.… however that doesn’t mean they still won’t bug me.

Considering all of the above it’s a miracle I don’t just take them down.

#cozy ask #Any of the condescending comments I just delete anyway. #i dont have the chops to be a ‘content creator’ or whatever robotic term people use nowadays #im not a content creator! #i just make shit then pin it on the fridge #i promise the annoying remarks are few and far between. its mostly just quoting the video or nice stuff #I dont even read them often. i just check if im bored or on accident

[lord-radish]

Top 5 Media Experiences of 2022

???

Snapcube's Ratchet and Clank 3 playthrough

DanganRonpa 1 and 2

Dar Williams

lord-radish

First of all, I liked all of her RnC playthroughs a lot. I loved it when she sold Clank for 640,000 bolts, and the tangent about Ratchet going over to someone's house and doing sideflips in front of them after chat tricked her into the boob glitch. Her ship voiceover for Going Commando was one of my favorite parts of those sections, I love how it became like defacto knowledge that it was the ship itself making those noises.

"uhh yeah can you get me one of those chiccy sandwiches please? thank you thank you thank you" is burned into my brain bc Youtube kept losing my place and I kept having to start that VOD from the start. The tangent about the clothes seller in Tools of Destruction comes from a goofy place and I love it. The first four streams go from strength to strength - they're incredibly entertaining and immensely quotable, even months later.

I watched a LOT of Ratchet streams this year. Never quite finished Crack in Time and beyond, but I saw the rest. And 3 is my favorite, because A) that was the one big formulative Ratchet and Clank game I played as a kid, and B) 3 is probably the funniest and most well-structured game in the PS2 era. I never knew because I had limited experience with the first two games, but it's no surprise at all that 3 was the first game with a dedicated writing staff after seeing the other two (which are perfectly great games in their own right).

So clearly I have a bias here. Penny seemed to have an absolute blast with this game, I remember her losing her shit at the Courtney Gears music video and she bought into Dr. Nefarious after being wary of him due to prior exposure to the character. That bias played a role in my enjoyment, sure, but it also just felt nice to see such a funny, cozy stream because I'm not used to that.

I've historically watched a lot of Vinesauce, Game Grumps etc. for like odd games and video game corruptions - I feel like even the more homey aspects of that content is steeped in irony and shitposting, with Game Grumps in particular being noticeably caustic. There's just as much laughing at the content creator for falling short at their sisyphean task as there is in sharing their victories, maybe even moreso. That's sort of been the cornerstone of how I consume game media. I've become very jaded and irony-poisoned over the years.

I think what made the Snapcube streams so special is that I was almost never laughing at Penny, but I was laughing with her. Yes, losing a bunch of lives can be frustrating and it can be funny to see someone react to that. But for every time Penny misses a jump and goes "Fuck!" with a small laugh or a bit of rage, there's an extended comedy bit she does that ends up being really funny and well-built, and it comes across as her having great fun with it too. I think it's that crowd work that makes her stand out the way she does.

That energy carried into RnC3, which was an incredibly nostalgic experience, and I enjoyed seeing her react to the game itself almost as much as I liked her own additions and embellishments along the way. The fact that she was playing such a nostalgic game was a bonus - personal memories or not, I was looking forward to entry #3 of like #8 of this awesome, entertaining game marathon I was enjoying so much. The nostalgia was still a huge highlight though.

Beginning to watch Snapcube streams as a whole was a highlight of 2022, but RnC3 just put a smile on my face like nothing else. The Sonic fandubs are really good, I absolutely saw those before I saw her streams, but these streams were what made me a Snapcube fan.

#top 5 #snapcube #long post #ratchet and clank #i actually found her stream content via jak and daxter. i both respect her decision to drop jak 2 and feel vindicated #bc while I think the story finds its footing by the end - I agree with her comments about the open world and the charm wearing off #i would still love a JnD1 style experience you know. I liked Jak 3 a bit more than 2 due to the gameplay improvements #even if the story isn't as good #quick note on the other name drops: I stopped watching vinesauce around mid-21 and game grumps had fallen by the wayside for years #but I've had a rough couple years and I made the decision to get back into them. not ideal but frankly I needed a balm #and nostalgic presences from the past was what I turned to #I want to move onto more content creators like penny. her streams really are such a breath of fresh air #it's like - there's a way of doing this content that I just haven't seen as much of outside of like hype fanbase moments and stuff #and I'd like to see more of that #like just really laidback enjoyable streams that are wholesome and have a high level of engaging elements to them #but which also say the fuck word and stuff. idk

[ashley-slashley]

tbh, the whole "let's put this beloved fictional hero against nazi zombies" thing is stale and should've just been kept a thing of the 80s and 2010s. like, we get it, nazis are the most universally hated group in history, but it gets bland seeing the same hate group be the antagonists in pretty much anything. same goes for using wwii as a setting for nearly every single war movie. if you interpret this as me saying to defend nazis and ignore them, i am not saying that - i'm saying it's just boring to see them be the antagonist in practically anything. i get it they're one of the most infamous hate groups in history, but, could we at least get variety in hate groups? there's other horrendous shit that's happened in human history before the 20th century ffs

#the shitposter goes on a tangent

[haljathefangirlcat]

I don't want to add all of this under the post I took this pic from, because I'm going to get nitpicky and long-winded and it would probably get really annoying for OP... and also because this is the "are you saying we piss on the poor" website, so someone would inevitably think I'm hating on either OP or Mary Reufle. Which I'm not, btw. I think the passage above says something really beautiful and tragic about humanity, and I'm thankful to OP for posting it, otherwise I might have never read it.

But it does remind me of a stupid pet peeve I've been trying to ignore since people on Tumblr started debating whether asexual sailors would be safe from the lure of sirens and other people started replying that, hey! Sirens in Greek mythology, especially the Odyssey, don't lure sailors by offering sex! They lure them by offering them what they desire! Which might be sex for some, but might be just some really great pasta for others!

... again, to avoid another obvious "we piss on the poor" moment: no, I don't actually have anything serious against jokes, thought exercises, and stories in that vein. Ace people belong in fun fantasy and/or mythology-inspired stories and story ideas as much as everyone else. And I'm well-aware you don't need my permission to write about a sailor saving their entire crew by being totally indifferent to sex or almost dooming them because some weird lady on a rock in the middle of the sea was loudly singing about being desperate to share cool frog facts with someone. Hell, I'd probably read both.

But anyway, the pet peeve I was talking about before going on that tangent is that the sirens do sing Odysseus' story to Odysseus, and it just annoys me so much, seeing people ignoring the fact that that's actually a thing that happens. Like, this is from Book XII:

"[...] the Sirens failed not to note the swift ship as it drew near, and they raised their clear-toned song: “‘Come hither, as thou farest, renowned Odysseus, great glory of the Achaeans; [185] stay thy ship that thou mayest listen to the voice of us two. For never yet has any man rowed past this isle in his black ship until he has heard the sweet voice from our lips. Nay, he has joy of it, and goes his way a wiser man. For we know all the toils that in wide Troy [190] the Argives and Trojans endured through the will of the gods, and we know all things that come to pass upon the fruitful earth.’"

... yes, this translation is taken from Perseus and is, unfortunately, in prose. Give me a break, it's not easy to find good poetic translations of the Odyssey posted for free online when I'm not even a native English speaker and to me "Odyssey translation" means "Rosa Calzecchi Onesti's translation from the '60s." The point is, the sirens try to lure Odysseus (and would definitely succeed, if not for the ropes-and-wax trick) by telling him that they know everything, including all that has happened to Odysseus himself and everyone else who suffered through the war of Troy.

And yeah, you could argue that the main draw for Odysseus (his greatest desire, to tie it all back to mythological shitposting) is knowledge itself, because he is that kind of guy. But the sirens don't give any details on their knowledge of all that is presently happening "upon the fruitful earth." They do, however, give details on their knowledge of the past -- specifically stating they know Odysseus' past. The same man who, if you remember, can't take Demodocus singing about a couple of episodes from the war of Troy without needing to hide his face due to being completely overcome by tears, yet has a piece of meat from his own plate brought to Demodocus as a show of respect and gratitude for his singing. Unlike his own wife, Penelope, who when hearing the aoidos Phemius singing about the same war back in Ithaca, asks him to change the subject to something less painful...

It's just. It's so painful and complex and wonderful and it makes me want to tear my hair out every time I think about it. And nobody ever remembers it when someone brings up the sirens and specifically the ones from the Odyssey! *screams*

Btw, now that I've had my nice little rant, please do me a favor and listen to the song Le Sirene by Vinicio Capossela. Because this Italian singer and composer? He gets it.

Here's a rough translation of the lyrics:

The sirens

Tell you about yourself

What you were

As if it were forever

The sirens

Have no tail nor feathers

They only sing about you

The man of yesterday

The man you were, two steps from the sky

All your life before you

All your life as a whole

They say, stop here

The sirens

Assault you at night

Created by the night

They kept all the faces you loved and now

The sirens have them

They sing them to you in a chorus

And you're not alone anymore

They know everything about you

And the best of you

It's a song of sirens

And you hear it in the regret

Of what you lacked

What you glimpsed and won't have

They give it to you

Only in song

They sing to you of how you came from nothing

And nothing you will be

The sirens are a night of beer

And the dawn won't come anymore

They're street ghosts coming in in gusts

They have the voices of sirens

Fill your ears with wax

To not hear them when it's evening

To stay firm

Tied to your routine

But if you listen to the sirens

You won't come home

Because home is

Where they sing about you

Listen to the sirens

They won't stop their singing

In the endless wake, they sing

All your life

Who you were, who you were, who you were

Who you were, who you were, who you are

Mnemosyne

Why go on until old age

Until you feel ill?

It's all already here

Stop here

You don't have anywhere to go anymore

The sirens

Don't sing the future

They give you what has been

But time isn't kind

And if you stop and listen to them

You'll let yourself die

Because the singing is neverending

And it's full of deceit

And takes your life from you

As it sings it

... also, if you know Italian or you don't mind running lyrics through an online translator (not Google Translate, pls, they don't deserve to be butchered like that) or you're just looking for new music to listen to, do yourself a favor and go listen to Capossela's other Odyssey-inspired songs from the album Marinai, Profeti e Balene. They are:

La lancia del Pelide (The spear of Pelides, and yeah, this one is actually about the Iliad)

Le Pleiadi (The Pleiades, from the POVs of Odysseus and Penelope, and a much deeper and more fascinating take on their relationship than either "Odysseus is a jerk who doesn't care about her because he has sex with other women" or "he's cool, she's cool, they're a cool power couple" could ever hope to be -- even though I do love the latter a lot, admittedly)

Aedo (Aoidos, set in the aftermath of Odysseus' killing of the suitors)

Calipso (Calypso)

Dimmi Tiresia (Tell me, Tiresias, set in Book XI, when Odysseus summons the spirit of the dead seer and receives a prophecy from him)

Nostos (Actually about the tale of Ulysses' final "mad flight" and death in the Divine Comedy, Inferno, Canto XXVI -- yes, you need to listen to this one, too)

... okay, yes, this post did turn into Vinicio Capossela shilling. I swear it wasn't the initial intention, it just happened. But you know what? I don't even care because most of the songs that make Tumblr users go "OMG THIS MAKES ME FEEL SOO UNHINGED 😭 TOTALLY FERAL 😭😭 WHY DOES IT GO SO HARD 😭😭😭" don't go even half as unnecessarily hard as the lyrics to Aedo and Nostos. So, yeah. You can thank me after lying on the floor like "head full. way too many thoughts" for an hour or two.

#long post #greek mythology #the odyssey #odysseus #sirens

[ikilledamanforthisurl]

Minami x6 you are okay boss everyone needs to recharge sometimes……. Im actually extremely head empty today so apologies if this is like just Entirely Words V_V But real real…… I wish there was more general discussion of Majima's relationship with his family because iirc it wasn’t even something he asked for initially but he gets it Anyways and now he just has to deal with it. But not only that it soon becomes somehow The Biggest Family in the tojo which leads now to Majima basically being responsible for like so much of the clan to the point where he’s constantly getting threatened because there’s no one else TO threaten anymore the tojo is in such shambles…. and well how are you expecting him to act normally and kindly in this sort of situation. I wish the games took it more seriously because I feel like at least w what we see of Nishida Majima's casual violence and abuse is treated a bit too Jokingly but like I get why he’s Like That. World is a hell the cycles just keep continuing forever! Also nah you’re okay for tangents I also actually love Majima a lot I just feel myself break out into hives whenever I have to witness fandom Majima Family stuff where a lot of it treats it as though it’s just like funny cutesy hahas and not like an Organisation of extremely violent and fucked up people who realistically probably don’t know how to really interact with each other and the interesting ways this could be shown. Like i love shitposts top but come on gang. Png

Also I hope you don’t take this poorly but I have no idea who Aratani is <///3 I couldn’t find him on the wiki and Im not super far yet in the yakuza franchise so you’ll have to excuse me if your points In Regards to majima family members which one actually is taken seriously and which one is not Im just nodding along. But YES real I loooveeeeeee the whole minor theme of like reputation and stories in yakuza…. I think Kiryu is the most notable example of this with how much reverence people put on his name and how it affects like important characters (nishiki most obviously but also Ryuji and the whole debate of “There can only be one dragon” etc) but Majima would definitely also have stories about him that would spread far and wide and it doesn’t matter if they’re true or even real at all because it’s the Image that lingers and that would affect the people around him too most importantly to this discussion Minami. Wants to be somebody ism IS real and i am shaking it around by the neck

Minami might be a lil side character goofy guy but he is my friend and ill put the work into developing him if i must. RGG hire me for my spin off game where you are a employee at Majima construction and you do building minigames and get to hang out with and get to know better Nishida and Minami respectively amen. And i hope the playlist making of one day goes well <33

FEAR NOT! i have pickture of the sulking wretched fiend.....

I'm afraid i don't have a screenshot of him not going on about his whole deal but he's literally patriarch-gunner personified....... Aratani (and most other M.Family men that i'll ever mention for a while besides Minami and Nishida) is a Dead Souls exclusive! i am currently watching a playthru of DS because i've already exposed myself to spoilers a'plenty cause idrc + i think having the most atrocious watchorder of Yakuza is really really funny. We've gone from all of Y0 shown to me by an ex > a lil bit of Y1 > Dead Souls > and then imma do either Y7 or Y3. i enjoy making things harder for myself

also ive had the exact same wishful thinking to myself....... sidecharacter spinoff game...... where u just hang out with them or some shit whatever. most loserific iteration being a Minami focused one because Who Even Wants That but i'll own it idc i have ideas. i have plans. the haters (rggstudios legal team) will sabotage me etc etc. i'd like to think i could have an okay shot at balancing the At First I Lol'd with the But Then I Serioused in a way that's satisfying 'cause both are integral to these characters to me. just like, two more seconds of thinking implications of Anything through would do this series Wonders

but sidetracking cause you mentioned M.Construction and its got me Thinking Again cause like.... i like the idea of balancing Nishida + Minami as opposites in many ways who clash and struggle to fit in with the other. they're not perfect opposites by any means but they function pretty closely. i like stressed, decent Nishida representing the side of the family involved with M.Con while lenient punk twat Minami is firmly planted in the Yakuza side. if Junior Leader is at all involved with a training position then that kind of helps prop up this idea a little bit.... though, ofc, there would be plenty overlap, having so many men on payroll practically requires you to make jobs for them, so it's not like the Family is divided into these two sectors or anything.... lots of mixing of shifts goes down no doubt. whether there is a method to this assignment is another story entirely (probably depends on each person's strengths, abilities, whether they applied for sitework specifically, or as punishment/reward)

(shit i made up territory) Minami is probably assigned to M.Con worksites often.... probably as punishment 'cause you already know this man got the 80HDeez he can't sit still and not cause trouble for the life of him. it both keeps him in one place and occupied while still holding over his head that he Fucked Up, Dummy. oh great, now I gotta deal with Nishida's bullshit (petty squabbling ensues in the office that's my setup to get the two to interact on a regular basis anyways.... there's lots of fun to be had with these two, but so little actually bridges them together. they're SOOO WORSTIES but they work on the other ends of the Family. one's at Oyaji's beck-and-call and the other is kept as far away from Oyaji as possible the millisecond he annoys him a lil too much. one belongs in finance and requires anxiety drugs while the other can't dress himself and needs rehab. oh my god theyre so (crushes them in my hands like putty

#ikildaman shut the fuck up #laughing at being called boss also. me? boss? you have contracted yakuza goon syndrome #i cant even say i hate it its kindof slay.....(guy whose faves are all gang goons #in a strangely beautiful irony Minami probably Does get stories told about him.. #theyre just not told with the fearful reverence that Majimas are #Majima basically crawled out of hell kicking and screaming and shrieking and killing. Minami is just a weirdo #(said with love) #everything u say abt Majima nd his Family are so real and true btw you get me you Get It #I NEED A SPOTLIGHT ON THE FAMILY MEN.... I NEED IT NEEOWWW #something beyond using them as plot and joke props. please #i need just one family man to be a Person a little bit. pleeeeeeease #i think Kido is like this a little bit but im not sure. looking forward to meeting him #Rikiya too ohmy god how could i forget

[nokillbananashelter]

Thread/comment derailment, by social space:

Facebook: comment is a brick of personal opinion from some guy you barely remember, that is only kind of on target with the OP, that’s 13 paragraphs of justification for being like “I don’t care about this and I don’t intend on changing and maybe you should feel bad for making me have awareness of it for one millisecond ”, it has 50 reply flame war under it and will be deleted in an hour. Or it’s your grandma asking how you’re doing

Reddit: some low effort joke comment with 800 REPLIES that’s now the top comment, pushes the interesting comments to the bottom of a pit, has nothing to do with anything, and is just full of more low effort jokes and people sayin shit like “BINGO you hit the nail on the head right there” or “this guy gets it”

Twitter: some feral rando with an anime girl profile pic replying “I can’t believe you want to watch babies die, what a piece of SHIT” under your tweet that’s like “I love egg, egg is my boy”, you later find out that person is a slumlord

Slack: lmao nobody uses the fucking thread function in slack

Discord, similarly: please use the “unofficial official fartbutt goat camp 2” channel to shitpost I am begging you we’ve made 10 of them already

Signal: Can We Fit a Whole Forum For One Friend Group in One Continuous Feed? Find Out in 458 Messages 30 Minutes From Now, When Your Question About Whose Going to The Thing Now Requires Skimming a Novella With Tie Ins to Several Other Novellas Being Written as We Speak

Tumblr: The most interesting and deep tangent you’ve ever seen about the history of some fundamental but mundane thing, that expands your world view and flips it upside down, just absolutely life changing, what the fuck, what the fucking fuck, then someone comes in 2 years later and body slams it with the funniest fuckin shitpost you’ve ever seen, which then goes into its own deeply interesting tangent, fanfic is made, fan art is made, a whole aesthetic is fleshed out, there’s suddenly entire groups of people whose whole tumblr is about the thing, there’s controversy, people are crying, you find out that the person who made the shitpost pretended to be a famous author once, and is now mysteriously missing but there are people claiming to be them, the post goes away for 2 more years until someone goes “huh, neat” and an entire digital archeological dig site is laid bare, which leads to the most interesting tangent you’ve ever seen,

[vihrago-a]

this whole book has to be a shitpost , its so funny

— im reading watchdogs stars and stripes. they push so hard the fact that aiden absolutely fucking HATES racists and would punch a nazi is so 1) refreshing 2) hilarious because jordi goes on a tangent about america giving a fuck abt its POC citizens and all aiden does is **sniffs** ‘ man i didnt think abt it that way ‘ I CANT

#OOC.

[somethhing-someethinng]

Midnight Thoughts #20

*sometime in prison idk*

Dream, sighing: Tommy you know I can KILL you if I wanted to, right?

Tommy, too tired to deal with this: Yeah? Well news flash! So could another person.

Dream:

Tommy: Or a mob.

Dream:

Tommy: Or a highly dedicated weed.

Dream:

Tommy: Point is, you ain’t special.

#dream smp #midnight thoughts #shitpost #mcyt #Mama Midnight Strikes Again #incorrect dream smp #incorrect quotes #i just i magine standing there and reevaluating his life chices #behind his mask #while tommy just goes off on the tangent #maybe this could end up as an au where tommy doesnt die in prison #cuz dream is too interested in tommys thoughts to actually kill him #i think i will write an au about it #dream smp shitposts #dreamwastaken #dream smp memes #dream smp funny #tommyinnit #tommy posts