#these are much better for me to answer rn bc they dont take up as much tjme!!!

[louscartridge]

Hello, how are you?

I loved your sturniolo fic and was wondering if I could request a fic idea

I was wondering if you could do a Sturniolo Tripets x sister!reader where they are quadruplets and she is on her period and she gets really painful cramps and her brother comfort her and try to make her feel better.

a/n- ANON ILY YOU LIKE SHARE A MIND WITH ME OR SOME SHIT BC IM FR ON MY PERIOD RN OMG ILY!! i feel like some of this is kinda cringy but idk. also im good tyty and ofc you can request!! you can always request unless my requests are closed tysm for this!!

i do not give permission for my fics to be posted claiming to be yours, translated, or posted on another platform without credit

cw- none?

slowly waking up you roll over and turn your phone on. the bright light hurt your eyes so you quickly turned it to the side and turned the brightness down. reading what time it is you groan. you woke up sooner then you usually do.... unless, your on you period. once you realize why you woke up when you did you jumped out of bed and knocked on nicks door a few times before going to the bathroom.

nick tiredly came out of his room rubbing his eye getting used to the light. he didnt know why or who knocked on his door until he heard the bathroom door loudly shut and realized your door was open. he walked over to the bathroom door and lightly knocked on it. “what do you need from the store?” nick knew the drill by now 

“i have pretty much everything i just need some tampons- like the variety thing” 

“ok ill be back”

“what are you guys shouting about?” matt askes nick

“y/n is on her period. i gotta go to the store” nick answers going back to his room to get changed.

matt waited for you to come out of the bathroom sitting against his bedroom door.

“hey matt”

“hey y/n, do you need anything?” 

“food would be great.”

“on it! nick left already by the way.”

before matt went to make you food he woke chris up. matt knocked on chris’s door first to see if he was awake. when he got no answer he opened the door. 

“chris” matt said turning on chris’s light next to his bed. “chris” he said louder shoving his shoulder.

“mmmm what” he groaned. 

“y/n is on her period im gonna make her mac n cheese, nick is at the store, and you! christopher are gonna make her snickerdoodles- nope dont look at the time, your helping”

groaning you turn over on your side. hugging your stuffed animal. your stomach already hurt so bad. you turned music on in an attempt to distract you, but it didnt seem to work. you could always go downstairs and get a heating pad, but your stomach hurt so bad you didnt even wanna move.

as if nick read your mind he came into your room with a bag. 

“hey sweetheart.” he says sitting on the edge of you bed taking somethings out of the bag. “i got your tampons” he says as he puts them on your nightstand. “i also got you some waffles there downstairs in the freezer so just let me know if you want them, and i got you tea and some gummy candy too” he puts your tea and candies next to you on your bed. “oh!” “i also put your heating pad in the microwave, figured if you didnt need it now you will sooner or later.”

“thank you” you replied patting his shoulder in the middle of each word.

“stop-”

“chris dont drop them!”

“oh my god, im not trying to!” 

you laugh as you hear your two brothers down the hall slowly getting louder.

“open the door” matt whispers to chris

“chris dont drop them!” chris mocks. “if i open the door i will drop them!”

“just hold the plate with one hand”

“nick i know you can hear us just open the door!” chris kicks your door stretching out the end of his sentence with a sigh. 

letting them in, nick laughs “okay okay”

“you two make a mess” you joked

“yes but well clean it up.” matt insisted

“you mean y-”

“chris dont even” 

chris changed the subject “i got snickerdoodles! for you!” he sang putting them next to the drink and candy nick got you.

“and i got mac n cheese!” matt sang back putting the bowl on your nightstand. “oh wait and this” matt threw the heating pad on your bed. 

“oh my god!”

“the microwave went off so i assumed you needed it”

“yes thank you thank you!”

watching trevor enter your room, you ask, “can we watch a movie?” you pat your bed giving trevor the ok to go on your bed.

“sure” both nick and matt obliged. nick sat on a bean bag in your room.

“only if i can have some of your candy!” chris shouted, lying next to you.

#chris sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo x reader #nicolas sturniolo #nick sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #the sturniolos #the sturniolo triplets #sturniolo triplets #sturniolos x reader #the sturniolo triplets x reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #the sturniolos x reader #x reader #reader #x you #x yn #x y/n #yn #y/n #ff #fanfiction #fanfic

[aq2003]

it is literally canon that Martha stayed with Ten even though she knew he didn’t love her back. she stayed because she was in love with him. you can think whatever you want in fan spaces, but staying with him for love is exactly what she did. Ten was an ass to Martha in so many ways during this season, I think he coped with being the object of her desire (and even bragged about it to Donna).

sorry i'm putting my foot down here. anon we are watching different shows because in the very first episode ten is uncomfortable and shuts her down the minute he catches that martha has an interest in him. he (as stated by david tennant) spends nearly the entire season unaware of her crush. "i don't think he's [aware of her feelings for him]. i don't think he'd do that otherwise. i think he gets aware as the season rumbles on" — but even then, he still has that line in sound of drums where he goes "it's like when you fancy someone and they don't know you exist" to her. you could interpret this in either one of two ways, either he's trying his hardest to ignore her crush and is acting like it doesn't exist, or he honest to god still does not know. and when we're talking about a character that has a famously long history of being not involved in romance or being unaware of standard romantic conventions, the fact that he isn't aware of how she feels (however long that may be, but we know it extends over a majority of their time together) makes much more sense than... i dont even know. going out of your way to make someone fall in love with you but the moment you think she's in love with you you go "what the fuck! don't do that! back off!". like??!? and as someone who has been the object of an unrequited crush from one of my close friends before, it's difficult to look back on this person without thinking about it or feeling guilty over it. this is exactly what the scene with ten and donna reads like to me; they're talking about the relationship ten and martha had and he brings it up bc it's been directly on his mind (he's fucking tactless about it but being tactless is like one of his primary personality traits!). it's one of the reasons she left him! it's the reason why he rejects donna initially before finding out she wasn't interested in him! i'm not trying to say that their relationship was healthy or that s3 ten did nothing wrong or whatever but god will you all kill him for the crimes he actually committed

as for martha, i feel like you're misunderstanding the point i was making about her and i already got into arguments in two separate posts over it so i'll just leave it at "if you think her crush is her only personality trait and the only reason she chooses to stay with ten is /thinking he'll eventually fall in love with her back/ then please get well soon". look at shakespeare code when after ten compares her to rose and says he'll take her back home she sarcastically goes "great!" or at the beginning of gridlock when she goes "ever heard of the word 'rebound'?" (i could write another long post about this line but that's not the point rn) - she isn't having a good time! she knows ten isn't treating her very well! but the reason she doesn't want it to be "just one trip" isn't bc she's romantically pursuing him (which is the point i specifically took issue with) or even bc of her crush, it's bc she knows ten is grieving—he lost his home planet, his people, his kind-of-girlfriend and just needs someone with him and SHE KNOWS THAT! BETTER THAN HE DOES! look at family of blood: she's asked why she's his companion and she answers "because he's lonely". she KNOWS he needs her and as a character established from day 1 to be someone learning to save people for a living i don't think it's a massive stretch to say that she's not 100% in it for herself. if you take the show at face value, it's saying that martha is straight up wasting the years of her life and isn't getting nearly as much out of her friendship with ten the way he is with her. this extends to multiple areas of their relationship. and forgive me if i'm being too fucking bold but "thinking whatever you want in fan spaces" is a mentality you treat shipping with, not "analyzing the character writing of a writer first and foremost known and praised for his character writing"

#maybe i'm a victim of projecting or whatever but i dont even fucking care at this point ive watched series 3 #THREE separate times to try to get what the 'ten was leading martha on' take was saying and every time it made less and less sense to me #sorry. if this makes me pretentious or a haver of bad takes but i will die on this hill specifically #dr who #10 era #girl this post is so long and stupid i need someone to turn me into an oyster or perhaps shrimp

[bambuwu-writes]

Hi boo! 💕 Whenever you want and can think you could do a hc for (let's act surprised) Tsumugi, Omi and Tsuzuru when they are super whipped for their s/o?? like, i want them to love us so much ugh no shame asdfgh take care as always and sending you a big muah! 💕

Emi my bestieeee! <3

Tsumugi

omg he’s so SAPPYYYYYYYYYYYYY

come get your man he’s legit talking to the flowers about you

“I’m so excited for you all to grow up big and strong :))) Once you’re all ready I’m gonna take you to meet someone :))) They’re very nice, I hope you like them!” BABE THESE ARE PLANTS,,,,THEY ARE NOT COGNISCANT OF THE FACT THAT THEY ARE GOING TO BE IN A MINIATURE BOUQUET

he is SO precious tho… i feel like in terms of love languages he’d be really into gift giving and quality time

so at least once a week you two either go out for coffee or make some at home and cuddle up in the garden for a nice and slow morning

he also has this really cute habit where, instead of giving you a kiss on the cheek or something, he’ll just kinda softly smoosh his face against you..what a weirdo [read: what a cutie :”””)))]

if you happen to dislike alcohol he absolutely doesn’t mind, but if you do like having a sippy sip every now and then, he is a great person to drink with

azuma and homare loving bringing home nice wines for the adults at mankai to sample during nights in, and guy is always willing to mix a drink or two for his friends

as much as he loves verbally expositing essays about theatre when he’s tipsy, he also becomes a TOTAL cuddlebug its vv cute <333

if you have to get up to grab some snacks or hop into the bathroom real quick, you will come back to tsumu looking the sliiightest bit mopey

he j wants to keep his hands on you :((( make sure you’re still right there with him :((( uk he loves you soooo muuu- OOO you brought pretzels yaaay :D!!!!!! [SILLY BABY,.,.HOLD HIM PLEASSSEEEE]

makes you really nice fluffy omeletts the morning after to make up for anything embarrassing he might have said the night before…. if you give him a little ‘good morning’ peck on the cheek he will brighten up considerably tho.

Omi

He,.,he’s kinda obsessed with giving you forehead kissies.,,

Like, he will not leave the dorms, nor let you leave without a forehead kiss, makes him feel safe :)

if you do it back to him he will go to the akigumi groupchat and literally tell them he’s found his future spouse. they cant bring themselves to clown on him. [banri clowns on him the tiniest bit but thats just bc he knows omi is being so honest rn that it makes the kid tear up a little. fuck man, you cant just go and prove love is real to me like this? ewwww???]

he has,,, ok DONT laugh, but…he has burned food bc he was thinking ab you…EMBARASSING right???? [he’s so cute wtf i cant even write this with a straight face ]

not a day goes by where he doesnt either text you or tell you in person how handsome and pretty and cute you are [EURGJK,,,he’s sooooo…]

you will find yourself wondering if he even knows what he’s doing to you…[answer: he DOES WTF WAUUUUGH,,.,]

ok he does this little thing…where like, when he hugs you from behind he’ll always say this precious little ‘hey :)’ so he doesnt scare you [SOBBING..GIMME A MINUTE…], and then he runs his hands up your back, over your shoulder blades, and down your arms before snuggling into the crook of your neck [im gonna SCREEAMM,,,HOW IS HE LIKE THIS…]

loves playing low romantic music while he’s cuddling with you [i’m currently back on my hozier kick and wauughg,.,good music..] and if you start singing along? god help this man i dont even think he’ll be breathing so he could hear you better..

baby him PLEASEEEEEEEE THIS MAN NEEDS SOME CARE AND TENDERNESS IN HIS LIFE…

gets all smiley and giggly when you baby him :”) turns out he really melts when someones taking care of him… he will pull you in for cuddles and you will not escape [he will begrudgingly let you go if you really want to, or need to get work done]

Tsuzuru

Gives you kisses on your temple! It just felt so right the first time he did it and it stuck!

Ok ok, i swear this isnt creepy, i promise i swear i pinky promise!! He really likes just snuggling his face to the nape of your neck, his lips pressed against your shoulder bc he really likes how you smell. It really calms him down.

Like he has stolen your clothes before so he could have you around even when,..,uk,,You The Person weren’t around

he is so used to being in a household of siblings so he thought sharing hoodies and stuff would come natural-WRONG WRONG WRONG DEAD WRONG

he looses his fucking marbles when he sees you in his clothes he is fucked up fr, god spare his SOUL if you swipe a pair of his shorts or sweatpants…he’s gonna have to actually turn away from you for a second to collect himself

like woaaaoww,.,.,.mine?,.,,mine??? like,,not in the objectify-y way but,..,,.omg mine???

MINE?????

cooking for you. 25/8. it will never end. so much yummby food,.,.,thank u tsuzu,.,.

fr like every single time you see him you’re getting fed SOMETHING like if you’re hanging out in the dorms? apron ON stove ON pan BUTTERED. if you meet somewhere outside? you’re either going out for a snack or he came with some food packed w him

he’s such a little weirdo too, like, if he’s in an affectionate mood there is a 62% chance he will lean in as if to give u a kissie and then fucking noms on your earlobe

ITS THE SILLIEST WAY HE KNOWS TO EXPRESS AFFECTION AND HE LIKES HEARING YOU GIGGLE I DONT KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU?????

#a3! #a3! act! addict! actors! #tsumugi tsukioka #a3! tsumugi #a3! hcs #a3! headcanons #tsuzuru minagi #a3! tsuzuru #a3! omi #omi fushimi #tsumugi tsukioka x reader #a3! tsumugi x reader #a3! x reader #omi fushimi x reader #tsuzuru x reader

[awetistic-things]

hi! i'm prof dxd autism, and i know you support self dx. i have some struggles understanding it, bc i guess,,, black and white thinking and i just,,, its very hard to make that connection, bc like, i want to support it but like theres also like, bad experiences with people claiming autism to weaponise something or all the news about fakers which might not even be true but like. im at the point where this is my view:

i support self suspecting a diagnosis, but not self diagnosis bc i think there needs to be some degree of seperation. like you can research one condition but have another, so self suspecting and accommodating is a good thing, but self diagnosis isn't because you don't have like, the full picture, and you need someone else to analyze it, so self suspect, not diagnosis. (sorry if not clear im kinda out of words rn)

but i also recognise that that view isn't really correct anymore, but im having trouble changing it so i guess what im asking is do you have any account to follow/things to read to support self diagnosis so i can change my views. totally cool if you dont want to tho. anyway bye! have a nice day. sorry.

hi 👋🏼

i can't find any specific blogs, but i do have a few things to say:

getting out of the black-and-white thinking is difficult, and i appreciate that you're trying to do so

self-diagnosing in general can be life-saving (when done right, which most of the time it pretty much is, regardless of what you see online) whether it comes to autism or breast cancer. so often, people get passed up and can't get what they desperately need due to discrimination within the medical community (and every community) so they have to take matters into their own hands

a lot of the time even when people go to get evaluated for autism, the doctor is the one who says they "suspect" the patient has autism and then don't give a diagnosis at all (happened to me three times before I got officially diagnosed) there are so many autistic people who go to get evaluated and get straight-up turned down right to their face, which usually leads them to self-diagnosing because there’s nobody willing to actually ‘analyze’ them in the first place (/nm, this reads as passive aggressive i think, but that’s not my intention, i promise /gen)

even if you are officially diagnosed there’s no telling that you’ll get any ‘analysis’ information after an evaluation (most of the time it’s just a paragraph or two) which is why self-diagnosing can be so incredible, because that’s when you get to analyze your own behaviors and traits and work through your internalized ableism so that if you do end up getting a diagnosis you’re not blindsided and have (hopefully) already accepted the fact that you are autistic

essentially what i’m trying to say is that so, so, so many psychiatrists and psychologists have internalized (or fully conscious) prejudice which heavily affects their analyzations and makes self-diagnosing so often times necessary

honestly, i think self-diagnosing is the first step in acknowledging and accepting that you’re autistic

i think many autistics who were officially diagnosed and were surprised by the fact that they’re autistic should look at it from a self-diagnosed autistics point-of-view

and by that i mean actually taking the time to forget whatever your doctor said about how you operate and instead analyze your life, because it’s yours, and nobody knows it better than you (especially from a 30 minute evaluation in a converted supply closet)

sorry if any of this came off as aggressive, it’s all genuine and i do very much appreciate you asking me this question and i hope my numerous different answers helped somewhat :)

#autism #autistic #actually autistic #asd #autism spectrum disorder #on the spectrum #self diagnosed autism #self diagnosing #self diagnosed

[onlyswan]

Hi arttttt❤️🫶❤️🫶❤️🫶

How are youuuu??? I missed you sm😭❤️😭❤️

How have you been omg!!! I feel like I missed on a lot of stuff lol

I LOVED THE NEW DRABBLE😭 it’s so fucking cute ahh jungkook and oc are the cutest!!!

AND???? THE END ??!??!??!!!!! ART???

What the fuck is going on!!!!!😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I am so excited for whatever that beautiful mind of yours will bring next!!

I’ve been busy with uni (when am I never busy with uni smh) and I finish this long ass term on the 28th of December ugh I’m so excited to just be done with these 6 courses that I am taking.

As for the year-end survey I’m going to answer the questions (even if they’re a bit hard😠)

what is your favorite/s from the drabbles i've put out this year (second in which collection)?

I’ll give you my top 5 drabbles from this collection:

1. in which jungkook wants you all to himself (and bam) and you buy him flowers

This one never fails to make me smile

2. in which jungkook is giving up on you but you have so much love left to give

This one^ killed me but I love it

3. in which you make jungkook’s world spin and you tend to… make him a little too dizzy.

I read this like 1000 times I love it so much

4. in which jungkook can’t sleep, and he can’t stop kissing you either.

This one made me giggle and kick my feet

5. in which a shameless ex-lover makes your bad day worse and jungkook can’t help but to go wherever you are.

me 🤝 oc

themes, lines, paragraphs, or scenes that stood out to you?

art i’m not gonna lie to you these type of questions are the ones that I get on my exams 😭

For the themes ? Idk I just like soft fluffy things 🫶 so soft it makes me wanna throw up

and I like angst (ONLY SOMETIMES PLEASE)

I think this line from in which a shameless ex-lover makes your bad day worse and jungkook can’t help but to go wherever you are. is cute

“aigoo, why are you so messy?“

for scenes I think this one is funny

“ow- ouch- baby! what the hell? what was that for?”

with doe eyes struck by headlights, he gapes at you in surprise as he rubs his poor shoulder that was slapped without warning.

and if it is not too much to ask- who is your favorite character, oc or jungkook?

Not answering because I love them both DONT TRY ME😠

which year/s would you like to see more of from 2017 to 2023?

I really dont mind anything! But I feel like 2019 jungkook is just ❤️‍🔥 and 2022 too oof.

and which season (spring/summer/autumn/winter)?

I’m a winter girlie so obvi winter

I think that’s all of the questions! I had fun answering them haha (even though they reminded me of my literary criticism course 🥲) I am so excited for what the new year is going to bring!! I love you art I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a happy new year!!!! I hope that 2024 will be an amazing year for you!

Love, 🥨

PRETZEL ANONIE MY BABY LOVE I MISSED UUUU SO MUCH 🥺🥺🥺

i’ve been doing much better since my break from school started !!! i really needed this for the sake of my sanity. hehe this is why i love the holiday season :P

AND THE NEW DRABBLE YESYESYHDJSHDFJJD IHHH IM SO GLAD YOU LOVED IT 🤭

as for the ending… no comment for now bcs it’s so fun seeing y’all freak out <3

goodluck with the rest of your term plssss don’t forget to take care and enjoy your well deserved break after 🥰

OOP YOU SAW THE SURVEY

your top 5 i loveeeee 🥹 also you’re so real for the #5 i think this is the first answer it was mentioned. i’m blushing and giggling just thinking about it rn likejsjdhsjdf

i had to search for which drabble is the scene with the ouch and IM LAUGHINGDHDHFH I FORGOT ABT THE LIP PIERCING DRABBLE. oc’s humor >>>

Not answering because I love them both DONT TRY ME😠

i’m sorry for my fault 😞 i bow my head down again

I had fun answering them haha (even though they reminded me of my literary criticism course 🥲)

this is so funny i’m sorrydhdhsjdhjshf 😭😭😭 i’m a literature girlie through and through i fear. but fr thank youuuu so much for answering i had fun reading your answers too :") hehe you made me smile a lot. i love you sm and i hope 2024 treats you well and brings you an abudance of everything nice in life 🩷 happy holidays!!!! please eat lots of yummy food too hehe :")

#art’s post office ☁️ #🥨 anon #onlyswan year-end survey #to make art smile :d

[kenobster]

I haven’t seen you post anything on ao3 since July, did I miss something??? (referring to your zero notes zero kudos post)

No, you didn't miss anything on my ao3. I've just been going through an Anakin whump phase on my tumblr lately (with answers to asks and miscellaneous posts and fanart -- some of which I already deleted when they got 0 notes, including a fanart I posted today. So even if you go looking, you wouldn't find all of them). So because of that, whether or not it's true, it personally feels like ppl aren't interested in certain things I'm excited about (tho the like.... three or four people who have shown interest, tyvm). And I'm really grateful to everyone who has read my fics on ao3. If I didn't have that huge bewildering amount of support to fall back on, I'm sure I'd be a lot worse off. So I greatly appreciate that. And at the very least, if all else fails, my mom will show support for all of my posts/fanart/fics lmao. Anyway, so I'm well aware lots of ppl dont have those things to rely on, so I'm hella not trying to take them for granted. ❤️ I'm very grateful and feel very lucky that so many people have said such kind and heartfelt things about my writing.

But there are certain things I still carry a lot of shame for liking. No one could ever make me feel ashamed about 5PE, but my biggest dream is to one day draw Anakin dubconnishly sucking Palpatine's dick. And my favorite fic universe to fantasize abt rn is the Vader Mpreg one. And those are things I do feel ashamed for liking at times. So when those are the things I post (currently on tumblr) that get 0 attention (esp when other things are getting attention), it sorta starts to reinforce the shame I'm already feeling.

Like, I spent 8 hours yesterday drawing that fanart I posted (which I deleted a few minutes ago). I skipped dinner and stayed late at work for 2 hours on Friday to finish writing this post on my work computer (bc my personal pc crashes if i try to make tumblr posts). Did I make either post to get notes? No. It was fun for me. Just the process of it was fun for me. I enjoyed myself so much!!! Totally worth it.

But do I regret posting them publicly instead of just keeping them for myself and my friends? ... Honestly, yeah, I kinda do.

Probably people did like the posts but are afraid to be seen liking things so dark and deranged. And like, that's okay, because I'm brave, I'm super brave, and I will be the first to post any deranged content out of any group of people. But I have limits, too. And if people are willing to read 5PE or shadow AU but not willing to read about Vader's uterus, then I start to feel less brave. :/ And I start to become demoralized over other things too.

Like, I was set to post chapter 10 of 5PE this weekend, but I haven't been able to work on it. Every Shadow, being less dark, is even harder to work on. Because if my perception is that ppl find me sick and grotesque and deranged for my most fucked up ideas (that's my perception, not necessarily reality), then it hurts to have my tamer content be supported instead.

Is that fair to yall? No, not at all. Am I trying to guilt trip anyone? Absolutely not. It's just a current unfortunate reality that's bumming me out, and there's not much anyone can do to change it. I just gotta let the feelings run their course.

Anyway thanks for reaching out anon. I feel better having been able to air all of this. Though I'll probably still step away to some extent (how long? who knows. The depressive episode will decide. But prob not for that long.

#sorry for mistakes i typed this on my phone #answer #anon #CW dubcon

[scarrletmoon]

tumblr ate this ask but i still got the email for it?? anyway thank you @unadulteratedkr ily

@unadulteratedkr asked: FOR THE FIC WRITER ASKS: 3, 12, 14, 18 (SPECIFICALLY GLASS HOUSES 👀) , 25, 37, 39, 42, and 45 obviously you don't have to do ALL of them, but I fucking love ask games and want to know ALL THE ANSWERS

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?

i use a lot of repetition? i focus a lot on how sentences sound so there's a cadence i like to follow, which means i end up saying the same thing in different ways which is kind of annoying but it's been my style.........forever 🥲

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you?

i dont think so? mostly it's been me discovering kinks i didn't think i'd ever be into bc i only started reading E fic last year. i have discovered that i can be into pretty much anything as long as it's written well!

14. Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer?

yes. off the top of my head, the only age gap fics i'd read are from friends/writers i trust. same with tentacle fics too, i think? and most iffy tropes although i can't think of any rn

18. If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would it involve?

i started writing one that was accidentally inspired by that one episode of Bob's Burgers where Bob's been on a waitlist for this fancy turkey and finally gets it, except this time it's Ed and Stede and Ed wants this fancy ham that'll take like, a 5 hour round trip to get, and Stede offers to drive. and then this happens bc i'm incapable of writing them as not being wildly horny for each other

“Have you?” Stede snapped out of his daydream, a little alarmed now how easy it had been to drift off while he was still driving. “Have I what?” “Dreamt about this.” Stede’s heart galloped in his chest. It was a miracle he could see the road at all, with his head full of the rumble of Ed’s voice, the heat of his body, his fingers light on Stede’s hand, no longer guiding but following the movement. “Why do you think I was so eager to drive you?” One of Stede’s favourite sounds in the world was Ed’s laugh, especially now when he was especially relaxed, warm and effortlessly, hypnotically alluring.  Stede circled his thumb over the head of Ed’s cock, shivering as he caught the pearl of moisture there, and Ed gasped. “Fuck.” Stede could feel the way his thighs tensed, the twitch as the fingers of his free hand curled on the seat. Stede could hear his breathing too, his panting growing heavier with every long, languorous stroke. This was usually the point where Ed got impatient, started bucking his hips or whining, but he was surprisingly patient. Watching Stede’s face through heavy-lidded eyes. Waiting for more. “Did you decide to behave for me today?” Stede flicked his eyes to Ed’s face and away. Ed’s expression was distractingly rapt, even in Stede’s periphery.

25. What other websites or resources do you use most often when you write?

merriam-webster thesaurus is my best friend

i'll also use One Look occasionally if MW isn't quite cutting it

oh also the color dictionary my beloved

37. Promote one of your own “deep cut” fics (an underrated one, or one that never got as much traction as you think it deserves!). What do you like about it?

maybe it's good that no one read it bc i didn't get it beta read but take from me my lace was so fun to write. i wasn't going to rest until i'd put stede in those laced trousers from ep6, but sluttier

also i get why people dont read it bc it's a christmas fic but Last Christmas has my fave dom Stede outside of PB

39. Is any aspect of your writing process inspired by other writers or people? If so, who?

god, all the time. the porn wars with stephanie made PB so much nastier than it could've been. @unadulteratedkr has the most incredible suggestions as a beta reader. @oatmilktruther makes me want to be a better writer bc they're so brilliant. and then for some reason i also take my fic writing cues from bexless, at least for longform?? thanks unholyverse

42. Have you ever received a comment that particularly stood out to you for whatever reason?

i got so so lucky with PB where i'd get such touching comments from several people, including @lokigodofsex and @oatmilktruther who kept me writing (also Holy Man on ao3, i hope you're doing okay 💖💖💖)

45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic?

oh boy um everything? i finished a long form project for the first time in my entire life (i guess, not counting the time i wrote a "novel" when i was like, 13) and that really forced me to get better at continuity, character development, balancing an extended cast of characters and just writing smut in general. i had to end it before i could post all of it but i learned a lot 💖

#ask meme #scarrlet answers #thank you for this 🥺

[zhongrin]

I am glad ya are <33 and yes I am!! (Help;; already fainting at the thought of Baizhu and- 🏃💨)

This your man?

This sounds great ngl IFJEISVEIEOSBSB

imagine merman Zhongli whoa-;; ❤️

And oh, I understand now OFBSKKSBSJ we stan hoarder Zhongli <33

I always ask ppl before I send them drabbles cuz I don't wanna make anyone uncomfortable 🥹 and dw, I only send drabbles when I feel like it - won't pressure myself <33

HELP FODHSHSISJSHSJ Baizhu makes me a mess already enough, and my love for Baizhu isn't comparable so Nawh, only Baizhu it is ❤️

Ahh I ✨ see ✨

I would say he kinda is (my bestie even hcs him as a very jealous type omfg), but he doesn't need to worry - he is the only one for me ❤️

Umm I wanna ask what language these pet names are, I doubt they're English, are they? Care to translate? 🤸💞

And cjdjsvwksojaja read this post before I write this ask here! And idjfbsj ITS SO CUTE. HELP. MY ZHONGRIN HEART.

I'm kinda shy when it comes to collabs and matchups and stuff heh;; I only feel kinda comfortable when it's from my mutuals 🏃💨

Omg Rin you're a menace for calling Alhaitham "babe" just to fluster him, and I absolutely love that, 10/10 <33 ❤️

Nodnod yes yes for me Alhaitham seems like the type of guy who doesn't use pet names that much cuz he thinks your name is already so beautiful<3 💞

Mmm I would call Baizhu often "my sunshine" cuz he brightens up my life day by day just by simply existing <3 not too often "Bai" though (cuz I for myself get flustered by it ????? HELP DONT JUDGE ME DKDJBSKSOA) and only if it gets serious or sum then I call him by his name heh (when I am totally lovestruck then I even call him "my everything")

But Baizhus pet names for me um.. I brainrotted with my bestie bout it and she said he would totally call me "my angel" - cuz 1. I often get called that by my friends, 2. she said he would surely see me like a gift from the Gods themselves - like an angel yk? 🏃💨 (Flustering myself rn OFHDJWJWB), sometimes also "my dear", or when it gets serious "Dresvi" or when he is real bold and when he wants to see me becoming a blushing mess for the whole day - then by my real name heh. (Maybe even with a "my" infront of it)

My favorite dates? Honestly every date I get to spend with Baizhu, doesn't really matter where or when <33 but for a proper answer: spending time together on our favorite spot, often watching the sunrise / sunset, stargazing - or a picnic on it.. maybe even taking a stroll around Liyue Harbor or sum heh (I'm a simple person 🤸❤️)

What about you, dear Rin? <333 💞💞

(hELP Rin I also enjoy reading your answers sm, it's so cute how ya are gushing about your hubby's!! Please continue <33 and my asks make you smile?? OMG HELEOSHJSJ I am so so glad aaaaaa 💞💞❤️❤️💞💞🤸)

baizhu and ayato fighting over the adorably blush dresvi.... hehehe both has their own attractiveness and will woo you with different ways methinks. ayato sees baizhu giving you flowers and he goes off to send you ten large bouquets straight to your doorstep. baizhu sees ayato kissing your hand as a goodbye greeting and now he does that AND offers you his arm so he can escort you everywhere <3 oh fair maiden, who will win your heart? ;)

that's my man alright look at him isn't he majestic. he hides in his hidey hole most of the time, it's v cute i swear i'm not insane

look at how derpy he is????

also hsldkfjslkdjf merman zhongli.... ouffffhhasjdklajsd he hoards pretty shells and rocks and gives me gifts. how can i not love him 😭

jealous baizhu makes sense bc i think he would have this innder fear of not being enough for you and he's afraid you'll find someone better ;w; pls reassure him and give him all the pats and kithes and reassurance <3

ah yes some of them are indo and chinese hehe

'xiànɡ ɡonɡ' means 'hubby' / 'husband'. 'yang' is shortened form of 'sayang' which, translated to english it's like 'darling' or 'dear'!

'lǎo pó' means 'wife', and 'tiánxīn' is a chinese pet name, kinda like 'sweetheart'. 'nik' is... how do i describe it uh it comes from 'nonik' which is a cute way to call a female young girl, but it also can be used as a cute nickname for a guy to call a girl (my dad calls my mom that irl hehehe)

ah i see, no that's totally understandable!! do whatever you're comfortable to do! and i'm always happy to gush over our selfships anyway hehehe

yk what, al haitham would probaly tease me back by calling me a petname BUT from a different language. like ancient sumerian or something (that 20 languages fluency is coming in handy). and he would refuse to translate it for me bc he's secretly a menace >:T

...... does that mean when you say goodye to baizhu you'd say "bai bai bai"? ...... g-get it? bc bai sounds like bye and- /is shot

calling them by their full name when it's serious is such a nice trope hahahah (if i call zhongli "rex lapis" he immediately knows it's serious hsldfjklsdj)

"my sunshine" "my angel" "my dresvi" omggggg i also can see him calling you 'my flower' or 'my violetgrass' (ykyk bc it's his ascension mats hehehee)

NO BC SAMEEEEE i feel like with zhongli he would drag me out to nature a lot (i'm an indoor person most of the time but i love tagging along with my friends if they want to go outside and explore nature) so yes!! strolls in liyue plains and by the docks or seashores would be something we do a lot!! that, or us visiting teashops or eating outside while listening to storytellers or operas... otherwise if i really really don't want to go out that day, we'd just cuddle at home and cook together in the kitchen hehe

with al haitham, there's a lot of indoor dates lol if sumeru has a book cafe with a good coffee, we'd both frequent that place every week lol he would be reading and i'd be either reading along with him or occassionally feeding him food while he's reading about complex physics things lol

(DON'T MIND IF I DO OH GOD THESE ANSWERS ARE GETTING LONGER AND LONGER HELP HLADKJFLSD)

#rin answers #rin is having tea with: dresvi 💚 #rin selfships #zhongrin #meitham

[geroya]

(not sure if this will make sense bec im sleepy i apologize in advance if it's incomprehensible but) i CANNOT stop thinking about xiomara in contrast to zoe. like, specifically about how she's zoe's double but fiercely, viciously wants to live in spite of her existence as a doppelganger being regarded as an error, an anomaly, a bad omen, A Thing Which Was Not Supposed To Happen. & how she is both zoe and not zoe, where they both may line up perfectly and also where their motivations and methods (and, extension, morals) for achieving their goals or simply going through the world diverge. additional tangent -> doppelganger according to wikipedia (I had to look it up to make sure i wasn't confusing i with another word jfdfdhfdj<3) is a "biologically unrelated look alike or body double". thesaurus dot com defines doppelganger as "ghost" and the suggested synonyms are "apparition" "double" and "spirit". which makes me think of associated words -> copy? clone? shade? reflection? shadow? inverse? or, perhaps, zoe 2.0? 2.0 not meaning copy in this case but updated version, new version, Next Generation version. and how any of these interpretations could re-contextualize both the original and the doppelganger (or not). would any of these be applicable to xiomara? also (bonus normal question fdjskfjdsk) what is her favorite food if she has one? (if it's different from zoe's) *KEESES* !!!!!

THIS MAKES TOTAL SENSE JO DONT WORRY & IT IS SOOOOOO !!!!

re ur first tangent. ME TOO ME TOOO OH MY GOSH like my brain just keeps running it over and over and over and over. & like, how you said, the way xiomara wants to live so fiercely, so viciously in spite of her status as a double, does it make her like zoe still anyway? & DO xiomara and zoe keep going back to that? do they both look at their hands and go: oh. i'm just LIKE her. & does it make them sick or angry? does it encourage xiomara to distance herself further from zoe by doing things differently and zoe QUITE LITERALLY distancing herself from earth?

xiomara is literally a twisted take on zoe's bright hunger for love and her desire to be recognized, to be seen.

it also just. keeps bringing me back to kya & my head hurts TOO much rn to go off on THAT tangent.

re ur second tangent !!!!! which has me even more !!!!!!!!! (IN ALL CAPS <3)

ALL of those words are fucking. BOUNCING AROUND IN MY HEAD.

ZOE 2.0 LIKE YOU ARE- IM SHAKING. the idea that you cone back from one of THE most harrowing experiences of ur life & your double is THERE & she is THE better you. the better version of you. and the idea that everyone might agree with that. not just strength, power, etc, but she's the better friend, the better sister, the better daughter. sick to my fucking stomach. it's so good bc it works. it fits.

& oh my gosh i forgot bc my migraine but i didnt say it on here, i told beloved nina. that for xio's name, i had the thought that like. what if she found kya's journals (i literally just said i wasnt going to talk about her 😐) xio found journals from when kya was pregnant with zoe & was planning what to name her. & if you remember, kya thought having zoe after keme would fix her postpartum depression. she talks a bit about zoe in these journals being the one to fix it, the one she's hoping & praying will help her make it all better, will be better than keme. & in reading these journals, not only does xio come to WANT the family that existed then (with kya & jiahao, with ximena & yiska, with gran gran, with keme as a big brother), but she falls in love with kya as a mother, & is like. well since ZOE wasn't able to fix it. look at what ZOE's birth did. SHE wasn't the baby who ended up fixing it for kya, but if it had been ME, if it had been ME, maybe i would have been the difference. i would have been better, i would have saved our mother. she would have stayed, she would have loved us, she would have --

and THOSE journals are where xiomara finds her name.

so to answer ur question !! yes! i do think that the idea of xiomara being the 'updated' the 'better' version of zoe DOES fit her. is it true? im not 100% SURE. i think it's contextual, i think it's whoever you ask tbh. i also think that the words like 'reflection' and 'shadow' fit. 'ghost' and 'apparition' are SO much fun too <3

AND FOR UR LAST QUESTION !!! WHAT'S HER FAVORITE FOOD?

have not given it MUCH thought but it IS different than zoe's. she did not get to experience eating ximena's food before the older woman died so she can only fall back on false memories that live in her head of zoe eating it as a kid. however, i think she finds she likes roast chicken and rice. & mangoes <3 also eventually, keme's cooking. like. who WOULDNT....

#☼.txt #inbox #ahaura #jo #specular tag #long post #JOOOO #SPINNING HOLDING MY HEAD GOING CRAZY ABOUT XIO #ALSO I HOPE /MY/ RESPONSE MADE SENSE I AM STILL DEALING W MY MIGRAINE FROM YESTERDAY HEHE #BLOWING U KEESES

[unlimitedhorsepower]

Tagged by: @thevoiceofthanatos​

Favorite color: warm bright yellow, mustard yellow & old gold, and just yellow in general. its a good colour. it makes me happy

Currently reading: idk, probably star trek fanfic my friend @rubbertplant​ was writing to give my opinion on it. i often read through my own stuff too lol, like whoah i wrote that??? ADHD has taken everything from me including my capability to read though, for real. ive been thinking of trying to listen to some audiobooks recently though, this cannot continue... its just that i also have no ears disease so idk how well that would go. determined to try though

Last song you listened to: havent been listening to music so much bc ive been playing videos instead but my last.fm has all my spotify listens so itll stay up to date on whatever i listened to last. currently seems to be “please play-bite” by pinocchioP. i often just let spotify play me whatever it recommends anyhow so theres variance. and i only started this account like a few months ago max so its not really a full picture of my music-listening

Last movie (in theaters): its not really a movie, but if it counts, the first ginga nagareboshi gin stageplay (recorded and released in finland in theaters with subs)

ginga was always huge in finland for some reason. idk. the anime is so violent though that i got really afraid of bears for some reason. theres so much blood... i never read the manga either i just knew of the anime and partook in my share of wolf roleplays (dogs were uncool! so i didnt do dog roleplays. iirc that really was my reason).

heres some funny wolves from my wolf rp days

2010. one of the first things i coloured digitally... i painstakingly cleaned the scanned pencil lineart with a mouse

2011. i had gotten my first drawing tablet as a birthday/xmas gift and practiced a ton around this time (more than just wolves lol)

Last series I watched: trigun stampede. even changed my phone bg into vash... but millions knives is probably my favourite. he just does everything wrong and makes his life worse. and everyone elses life too bc he sucks. but hes multifaceted so hes also my meow meow and whatever. i hope a ford explorer drives over him

if it counts though, ive seen some star trek TOS episodes and movies because my friends have been watching them. im not super into it but its always fun to hang. i also dont watch a lot of stuff. i dont even know what i do. guy who doesnt read or watch things but listens to jerma videos on youtube without actually looking at them while i “draw” and “write”

Craving: food honestly. i should cook something lmfao. i also want soda so bad but i dont have any. id make some tea but its disgustingly warm in my house so i only want cool drinks. could kill for a nice milkshake or a smoothie rn i think

Tea or coffee: tea... im the only finnish person who doesnt drink coffee for real. also got really into loose leaf tea bc i befriended a chinese lady who is really into tea and has a tea shop in the city near where i live

Currently working on: drawing this and trying to think how i want to do it. somehow want to incorporate flat colours and maybe shade his body naturally, and make the blood look realistic instead of flat colours... hmm not sure yet what i want to do

other than that im trying to proofread the chapter of my ryanyuri fanfic i already published because theres a lot of typos and strange sentences in there but its been a chore bc my body breaks down when it gets too warm smfh... not looking forward to when my apt goes over 30 degrees celsius it is unlivable. im also trying to complete a “lookbook” of my tnb sims. but i always start huge projects that take three million years to complete and im really slow lmfao

Tag people you’d like to get to know better: i could just ask these questions from everyone i talk on discord with. fuck my friends i know irl or otherwise, only asking people who r my friends through tumblr. no need to do this though. also this isnt probably meant to be answered so long-windedly... thats just me. i cant answer with one word i gotta write an essay. heres three tags though @basslinegrave​ @vita-divata​

(record scratch before 3rd tag) and @rubbertplant​ bc they were streaming a game in discord when i started typing this and i was like hey wanna do it and they were like yeah

i expect replies on my desk by 5pm TOMORROW!!!!get to work!!!! no i jest, do it or dont, i dont mind either way, just if you feel like doing this. if you see this and want to do it feel free to consider yourself tagged. godspeed

#gabriels ramblings

[woolydemon]

Rule: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @wumboskywarp thankies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Relationship status: single and not particularly looking for anyone

Favourite colour: PINK !!! I love pink so so much <:]

Something I want right now: Uhh I want ranch almond crackers. Maybe a pizza I could go for a pizza rn. Snacks and meals in general.

Song stuck in my head: I've got several songs stuck in my head and they're currently Ego Rock (vocaloid disease), Experimental Film (h*r and tmbg disease), and Roll With Me (orion experience disease)

Three favorite foods: OH THIS IS SO HARD I LOVE FOODS. uhhhhh rn the top 3 for me is Rice Noodles (the thick chewy kind, esp with like beef and bok choy. delicious stuff), Chicken Nachos, Ice Cream (isnane abt ice cream, my family always hated when I ate all of it sjdhfkjf). was almost tempted to list a 4th one, sorry I love meal

Last song I listened to: Uh. To cite my previously mentioned tmbg disease I was listening to Don't Let's Start by tmbg ajdhdkdhdkjf

Last thing I googled: RICE NOODLES. SORRY. MEAL ON THE MIND AJDHDKDJ. Ok before that I looked up "hipstef" which is misspelled "hipster" bc i was checking to see if I am myself a hipster. I'm not, I'm just pretentious

Dream trip: I'd like to go to the one boba shop near my university campus rn does that count. Meals and treats on the mind

If you had the opportunity to [safely] become a cyborg via body upgrades, would you take it?

I'm a transformers fan, transgender, and have body pains. what do u think is the answer

im actually not gonna tag anyone bc i dont want to jhdfsfghj feel free to go for it though and say i tagged u ig. i dont care

#sorry it took me a while to get to this ive been busy with assignments and didnt want to let this distract me jfhdhjkg #also im just shy #anyway i think all ppl are going to get out of this is the fact i lvoe eating meals #rando thoughtz #<- using that as a text post tag

[shingogf]

And in celebration of my newfound drive to suddenly post and expand upon my (superb) opinions on my fav pieces of media, i must also say this: i dont rlly agree with the "hehe but its fun to imagine william had 0 motive to murder cuz hes just built diff lol!" affirmation like...yea ok but do u realize how dull and utterly boring that is from a writing pov. Scott cant fuckin write a linear story nor can he model humans to save his own life and has to pull 1000 books out of his ass to fill in the gaps and even THEN it still aint enough. So i can take the liberty to think about the what ifs.

Not negating the existence of serial killers that had a seemingly normal and uneventful upbringing doing what they did later in life at all, that IS a possibility. Theoretically the likes of dahmer and bundy could be put into that category (tho we'll never know for sure but i digress) so yes people who weren't abused or didnt go through major trauma can STILL commit heinous acts.

BUT i still think, for the sake of storytelling and character flavour, that it is infinitely better to say (this is fuckin fnaf lore we STILL dont have a clear answer of who was first nd i've seen many ppl who have diff interpretations when it comes to details cuz duh😑) that evan died FIRST and that was the beginning of william's downward spiral. Just imagine, an already unhealthy mind having to process such immense amounts of agony and grief. It's only logical he'll eventually snap and do something awful. And that only makes his folllowing actions all the more impactful and infinitely more fucked up.

I wont dive rn into the backstory of william that i made and how everything clicks into place when adding up the already known fnaf lore, but just the mere fact that he already by no means was a "good" person and suffered from untreated mental illness and then one of his OWN kids kills ANOTHER ONE OF HIS OWN like. USING HIS OWN CREATION. Can you imagine. That ultimately would make his already egotistical ass think "wow! life fucking sucks and if i cant have shit then no one will!" and thats precisely why he kills charlie afterwards, making her his first victim ever. And that was the only non premeditated murder bc it was done completely on impulse, he saw a chance and took it after henry berated him for his erratic behavior that resulted from evan's death bc it was causing up trouble at work and in their business relationship, so mans simply drove away angrily, saw charlie conveniently locked out of the restaurant and did it in a sick act of revenge that held nothing but pure pent up rage. And after he saw that he could even get away with killing his best friend's kid, he wanted to see just how much he could push it. This also makes sense when u think of when henry says "a wound first inflicted on me" at the end of fnaf 6 bc it implies charlie really being william's first murder and a personal one at that.

AND i have to say i also completely disagree with the whole william offed his wife and yeeted her into ballora theory. Not only would it throw more suspicion on william cuz at this point he had 6 victims and ppl deadass KNEW it was him, but i firmly believe mrs afton skeddadled sometime before elizabeth died. His fuckin marriage fell apart alongside everything else following evan's death in 1983. I believe ballora (just like how circus baby was modeled after elizabeth) was made as an homage to his wife and because it was clear the only family member he felt badly about was michael for obvious reasons. In my mind william always goes for victims he isn't emotionally involved with and actively avoids killing close ones (the only exception to the rule being charlie bc 1. it was done entirely on impulse and i believe its the only crime he regretted at least in the moment and 2. i dont think he was necessarily emotionally involved w charlie despite obvs knowing her, if anything i'd argue HENRY is more emotionally involved w william's kids bc he's a much more mentally healthy person than he is) a.k.a the double life serial killer if u will (think keith jesperson) like he literally cared abt his family in his own weird ass ways, he never wanted evan or ELIZABETH to die.

#t shirt that says under no circumstances should you ask me about william afton #.txt #mine #fnaf #he is just so silly. so goofy i have so much to say abt him. #rotating his fucked up psyche inside my mind like one of those 3d digital models on interactive screens at museums💜💜💜 #like idk if yall realize how FUCKED this is henry was one of the last remaining ppl in his life and when he just u cant be here leave lol #mf SNAPPED

[thewickerking]

i think its a bit silly (awful. its awful) that as i stsrt focusing on planning to connect with family (my salvadoran family as well as my dads family on the other side of the country) the family i actually have access to falls apart. there used to be seven people in my house and now there are four. none of those three are better off they are mostly worse and im terrified that none of these three children are going to be able to avoid living horrible lives. i don't think theres a future where my brother lives past 20 something and also doesnt go to jail. i genuinely cant see anything that stops either of those things from happening and its horrible. my aunt is testifying against my mother in court and my grandmother learned people were going to take my cousins away from my mother and she ran without a word and wont stop calling my mother to whine about how hard she has it. My mom isnt answering her calls. my moms bfs family has been shittalking behind our backs and something. really fucking shitty they did has come to light (will not elaborate) im just. exhausted. i want to connect with family and with my cousins living with us that was happening and fuck. fuck. just. they were loved. so so much here and they can never come back and it doesnt matter whats fair or right or just and fuck. my dog is scared of fireworks and she stayed in the room my cousins were in because she loved spending time with them. my sisters favorite word is the name of one of my cousins and they dont get it. they dont get that theyre never coming back. fuck. it feels like theres no light at the end of the tunnel. i cant even imagine recovery from what happened this weekend and i wasnt around for any of it until today. normally i can imagine myself a month after something bad happens and know itll get better but i do think it only gets worse from here. obviously it will get better for me personally im going to college and im excited but i genuinely cant think of anything in the world that would break my mother more thwn whats happened. i literally think my brother dying would've been easier to handle than this. and i doooont want to specify too much bc personal details and like. one of the worst things thats ever happening to my family rn and no one knows what to do other than what weve done already which is a short term solution to a very long term problem. i cant do anything and i cant even be reassured someone else is doing something i cant because no one knows what to do and my mom hasnt even told everyone yet. we had aquarium tickets. wild waves tickets. they were signed up for summer camps. we were doing everything and now theyre with strangers and are probably going to slowly enter a downward spiral of life repeating the cycle of my shitty fucking family and any attempts on our end to rescue them from that were fruitless. fuck. at least we vaccinated them. thats literally all i can say. anyways im going to bed ive been crying all day and i have work tomorrow

#sorryyyy for the long vent posts i literally havent done anything but work and cry today (sometimes both!) #.ares #vent #ask to tag

[chronic-gastro-illness-culture]

hello , i would like to request a second opinion related to doctor visits and the sorts if possible , if this doesn't follow up any of the rules or this is too personal of an ask to answer feel free to delete it /gen , some possible cws before i go further : mentions of doctors / tests , food mentions so , last year i had to get some emergency tests done bc the meds i got for my problems didn't help at all , aside from this i was suposed to have regular doctor checkups wayyy before this time but a certain family member has beef with my doctor and usually refuses to take me (i am 19 but i don't have a job at the current moment) a different doctor from my usual one prescribed new meds after this , i only started to take them a few weeks ago bc we couldn't read the doctors handwriting , thing is , i don't really know if they are working :/ , i have been having flare ups again , and some days they have been pretty severe , aside from the meds a family member insists i take this homemade remedy (homemade yogurt) bc someone we know claims it cured them , the issue is that any milk derivates fucking hurt to eat , and this "remedy" is no exception , so for now i am stuck between thinking i should wait more time to see if the meds really work or if i should get a second opinion with my usual doctor (aside from my family insisting the yogurt thing will finally be my cure) , i feel guilty for how much money my issues cost but rn i am almost in too much pain to care , i don't know what to do

im gonna apologize in advanced bc im rlly not that great w ‘delicate’ situations tbh but im gonna be real w u n say that between denying u access to a doc n forcing u to eat food thats a known trigger for u raised hella red flags n sounds like abuse

ik that docs n meds n appt can be hella expensive esp if u dont have proper or any medical insurance but if ur family rlly was only worried abt the cost theyd be working w u to find a remedy that isnt as expensive . instead ur being cut off from someone who can actually help u n r intentionally making u sick w this misguided belief that the homemade yogurt will make u better bc it worked for someone else

if i were u id lay a boundary down- if its safe for u to do so -n say ‘im not eating the yogurt i wanna give the meds a try’ or smth like that bc if ur eating smth that messes w ur guts it will be harder for the meds to work

idk what ur being treated for or what meds ur on but when i got put on protonix for my gerd i also had to change my diet n get rid of food that could trigger reflux that way the meds could work the way theyre supposed to . the same sorta thing works w diabetes n metformin . if someone w diabetes takes metformin they r supposed to watch the sugar n carbs n wtvr they eat n the metformin flushes excess trigger food out . the less of the trigger food a person w diabetes eats the less the pill has to flush out

normally ur supposed to start taking meds n adjust ur diet n after everything heals up or u find a dosage that works u then u start slowly introducing more foods into ur diet w exceptions to trigger foods . but if ur eating trigger foods while trying new meds it would be hard to tell if they r working or not

if u want a 2nd opinion thats up to u theres no harm in getting more opinions n getting more info n more perspectives can help u make a more informed decision when it comes to ur own personal health care . if u trust that doc n feel better w them bc they know ur history w ur digestive disorder then go for it . maybe they can tell u what to expect when it comes to how long the pills take to work what side effects u may have maybe they can find smth cheaper for u to try etc etc

but tbh the rlly alarming thing here is ur family/family member n their behavior . having a chronic illness sux but there is no one who suffers more then the person w the chronic illness . it would be great if there was some magic pill or remedy thatd make it all go away but it isnt . yeah its a pain in the ass . yeah it sux having flare up despite ur best efforts to manage symptoms . yeah it sux to have dietary restrictions n being That Person who has to ask if their food is safe or cooked correctly . yeah its expensive being chronically sick getting meds seeing docs getting tests for diagnosis or just symptom management . but ur family should be there supporting u thru it instead of making u feel guilty n denying u access to a doc n making u eat smth that hurts u .

wtvr u decide to do i hope one or both of ur docs r able to help u find meds that do work . the inbox is always open if u wanna vent or scream into the void or give updates etc etc

#anonymous #digestive disorders #chronic illness #stomach problems #abuse mention

[imsoglitter]

Hi kate! Idk if you’ll see this or answer but I wanted to send bc I’ve been following u for awhile and see u as sort of a big sibling/mentor that reminds me that it gets better and one day everything will be okay :’) do u have advice on how to move on? I’m femme and had my first ever kinda relationship w a butch and it was nice but they abandoned me on my bday celebration after blowing up on me saying that I was too high maintenance, materialistic, sparkly, and pink and my emotions were “too much to process” and “my presence was unhealthy” 6 months later they’re engaged to another femme who is more slow living and earthy. sucked a lot bc from day 1 they said I WASNT too much and that they would never leave. Idk I’m not sad I dont wish I was the soon wife but I’m convinced now that I’ll never find anyone bc all butches/mascs at the end of the day want that & I’ll be alone 4evr. I noticed all of my butch/femm couple friends are kinda same the same (earthy, natural, no glitz or glamour, etc). Feeling v high femme camp antics essay rn and having trouble coping. I tried changing my aesthetic and being minimalist but it put in deep depression so idk what to do. I’m unlikeable to all the ppl I’m attracted to but fitting in to be likable makes me want to kms. Any thoughts or ideas?? Hope this doesn’t come off as trauma dumping 😖

Hi anon! I don't know if I'm the right person to answer this bc I'm definitely a lazy femme who doesn't have the energy to be high femme, and the advice I'm going to give you is something you've probably heard a million times before.

If someone dislikes you enough to dump you on your birthday, you are better off without them. This goes for any other special occasion as well. The first time I got dumped, they very politely waited until I got back from a special trip I was on so it wouldn't be ruined, and I'm really glad for that. It made everything amicable and we're still penpals to this day. It sounds like your ex was bad at communicating the problems they were having in the relationship, given the blowup, and reacted pretty immaturely tbh. That's not the kind of person you want to spend your life with. (I'm also very wary of people who get married after less than a year of knowing each other, but that's a separate issue)

Honestly the best advice I can give you, and you're probably going to hate this, is take a break from looking for a sexual/romantic relationship. Focus on the other relationships in your life, whether they're with friends or family or even coworkers. And spend time with yourself. Definitely don't change everything about yourself to be with someone because you're going to have to live with yourself your whole life. The most important person to like you is going to be yourself. If you want to change think about expanding rather than dumping everything and picking something new.

And on the topic of finding someone who will love you the way you are, your best goal is to be patient, and to take action when you feel ready. Don't settle with someone who tolerates you or you'll end up like my parents (bad). And if you feel like there's potential, don't be afraid to make the first move. Pining is fun until it's not anymore so it's better to skip that part sometimes lol

Practical speaking here's my advice:

Delete your dating apps for a while

Get yourself a vibrator

Go to the movies by yourself

Pick up a new physical hobby like gardening or woodworking or cooking, something you can touch

If you hate your new hobby drop it and try something else

Try a new restaurant you've never been to before

Go for a walk/sit in a park weather permitting and birdwatch

And if you're seriously suicidal, take inventory of yourself and see if you can come up with a plan to avoid that headspace. Therapy and meds helped for me, but the main thing was moving out of a toxic environment. Plus I'm not stupid enough to pretend that therapy fixes everything all the time

I guess I'm saying you should date yourself, but trying to not make it sound super corny lol. I hope this helps and I hope you can figure out how to get out of your rut. I'm rooting for you!

[inactivedoesntexist]

thank you sm liv i love you 😭 (if this takes a while to get to you it’s bc i was trying to word it in the least confusing way LOL) ok so basically! i start college next year and this friday, our dorm request/application form opens up and we need to fill it out asap. the issue is im basically in a crippling trio friendship rn 😭😭😭 with me, by best friend, and the third friend. theres only two people to a room and me and my best friend really want to room together (not just because we're closer but we both think that our personalities would work better sharing a room if that makes sense). it wouldnt be a big deal to tell our third friend that we want to room together but me and my best friend found out from someone else that our third friend feels like we're distancing ourselves from her and that she feels left out (i just wanna clarify that this isnt anything on purpose, we just never see each other at school anymore because of different schedules and stuff). sooo the problem is that our third friend feels left out and me and my best friend dont know how to bring up that we want to room together without hurting our third friends feelings 😭 so basically i just wanted to ask you how we should bring up the dorm situation without being mean?? ive talked to a few different people about it and they've all said something like "just be honest with her" but me and my best friend feel like horrible people tbh 😭😭 ANYWAYS thats all. if anything doesnt make sense i will 100% clarify for you dw and thank you anyways for even taking the time to read this and respond. like seriously i love u!!!

fjdkals anon ily too, thanks for trusting me and respecting my opinion enough to ask me for advice! i hope i can be somewhat helpful but you have to do whats best for you. <3 im gonna put a cut so my response can be long but it isnt taking over everyones dash lol

first of all, congrats on starting college!!! i have to be honest, this is a time where lots of friends do grow apart or friend groups go their own ways because life just kind of naturally flows that way. you may not know youre distancing yourself but again - life will naturally push and pull you from people and sometimes it will be forever friendships and other times people will fade out of your life a bit. i have plenty of people that used to be my closest friends that now i barely speak to because life has just taken us in different directions but there are no hard feelings and still so much love there. i think you just have to be honest with your third friend though and just say that you feel like its best for both of you to room together as the reasons you told me in your ask above. :o

i hope that makes sense? im kind of answering as i read here..

i know that hearing 'just be honest' is not really what helps right now... i agree that it would be helpful but that isnt going to take away your anxiety around the situation.

i think you don't have to be brutally honest but you do need to sit down with your best friend/roommate and talk about your approach beforehand and set some boundaries if things escalate. you can nicely explain this and anyone who respects you and your choices will not cause a scene over you doing whats best. i have plenty of friends that have lived in and out of being roommates but its all mutual that we can live where, whenever and respect that we're all still a group of best friends. ya know?

did this help? do you want anything more specific?