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sachiko1309 · 5 months

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I will protect you - Part 2

Summary: After the kidnapping and rape of Lucy, the relationship between Spock and her strained, causing a big fight between the two. Both interpreting the actions of the other wrong. But what could be better than an honest talk and make up sex?

Word count: 3315

Warnings: overwhelmed Vulcan, make up sex, smut, Minors DNI! this contains adult content

Other notes: The extended mind meld is ssth that grew in my imagination. Just ignore or run with it. Thx 🥰

In honor of a good friend of mine: @mystery-star thanks for poking my brain to produce happy chemicals and therefore continuing to write 🥰

Part 1:

As Spock and I walked towards our cabins after our shift, I became more nervous with every step. I fumbled with my uniform with shaking hands. Straightened my belt, only to play with the clasp on my gun holster. I opened and closed it again and again, almost biting my lip to bleed. Spock suddenly stopped and took my hands in his. " T'hy'la." He ran his thumb over my lower lip and gently pulled it from between my teeth. “Your concern is unfounded.” I closed my eyes and let my head fall into his hands. “It is not. And you know that too.” I answered and took my hands away from him.

We walked on in silence until we reached my cabin. Spock naturally opened the door for me and let me enter. Once inside, he continued the conversation as if nothing had happened: “I know that my actions have caused you to doubt the strength of our relationship. It wasn't my intention to leave you alone. However, when I saw how unhelpful I was to you at that moment, I at least didn't want to overwhelm you any further. My reaction was misleading. Please forgive me.”

I looked at him for a moment and felt tears streaming down my face again. He immediately stiffened, but I took a step towards him and hugged him. "Oh Spock... Thank you for your apology really, but I know you only wanted the best for me. And I'm just as sorry that I overwhelmed you and offended you so much. It…” I trailed off, not sure how to express myself. “It was only… when you pulled away from me that Hanesh’s words suddenly became so real…. It was like what he said was becoming the truth... That you were leaving me." I held up a finger as he tried to contradict me. “No, let me explain. Every time I shied away from you; you left the room. And then when I felt like I was closer to you again, you completely separated from me. It suddenly made sense in my head. You decided you didn't want me anymore... And when you said it would be better for me if we didn't get closer... I just lost it. I'm so sorry, Spock. And I honestly don't know how I can ever apologize for that..."

“T'hy'la ...You don't have to apologize for anything. I should have realized what was going on with you. Knowing what Hanesh said to you and feeling how much, it hurt you. It should have been clear to me; you wouldn’t be able to react logical at all. What I hadn't considered was, how much it would affect me. I was firmly convinced that it wouldn't affect me to the extent that it did. And my inability to control myself made you think I was leaving you. It's entirely my fault.” Spock held me close to him, as if he needed to make sure I wouldn't disappear.

I shook my head vehemently. “Still, I shouldn’t have yelled at you and attacked you. That was wrong.” He let out a small snort. “It was completely illogical, but after all, you are only human. Besides, it would take a lot more than your hand to hurt me.” I leaned back and looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. “What does that mean now?” But I recognized one of Spock's rare crooked smiles on his face and immediately relaxed. He had teased me. "You stupid Vulcan." I growled jokingly, giving him a playfully angry look. “I could very well hurt you.”

Spock raised an eyebrow and placed his hands on my waist. “Oh, yes?” He asked challengingly. “Are you sure about this?” And out of nowhere he picked me up. I shrieked in shock and wrapped my arms and legs around his torso, eliciting a small laugh from him. "Oh yes, my little k'diwa doesn't need any help to defeat me." I punched him in the arm, which he only responded with a cocked head.

"You're so mean!" I said breathlessly, trying to get my heartbeat under control again. Spock, on the other hand, just held me and continued to look at me. I knew it didn't really take him that much strength, carrying me like that and that knowledge inevitably caused my thoughts to start rattling around in my head. And as he saw the blush slowly creeping onto my face, the smile on his lips became more sarcastic. "Mean? Are you sure that’s the right word?”

“Absolutely.” I blurted out, trying not to shift too obviously in his arms. But when his voice sounded directly in my head, I couldn't help but sigh contentedly.

“I can think of some other words that would be more appropriate.”

Every time I heard his voice in my head, it was like he enveloped me completely. It was like a warm, soft blanket that wrapped itself around me protectively and at the same time gently caressed my body. I tried with all my strength to fight against my own body, which of course shamelessly betrayed my excitement to Spock.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I muttered in my head, looking past him to the bed behind him.

“Of course not, Rom ko-kan.” Was the answer I received. And the sensuality with which he called me his good girl finished me off completely. Without even thinking about anything other than him, I pressed my lips to his.

A satisfied moan escaped my lips as I felt the grip on my waist tighten. How much I had missed that. How I realized in that very moment how much I needed him. In my mind-numbing excitement, I let out a small whimper and began tugging at his uniform. Spock understood what I wanted from him and carried me to my bed.

We landed more or less gracefully on the soft mattress. Spock's lips left mine, only to land on my neck. "Fuck..." I clung to him tighter as he began to place gentle kisses and bites on my neck. His hands left my waist and slowly moved under my shirt, testing how much I would allow. I let him rule freely, surrendering myself completely to his hands.

Without me really processing it, Spock freed me from my clothes. He left kisses all over my body, caressing every square inch he could get his hands on. His hands were overwhelmingly gentle while his lips were urgently hot against my skin.

I knew he was holding back because of me. That he didn't want to scare me. And yet I began to panic. Hanesh words ringing in my ears: I will always remain a part of you. I sucked in a sharp breath and stiffened under Spock's touch. He immediately let go of me, his hands fluttering towards my face. “Look at me, t'hy'la. You're safe with me, do you hear me? I won’t do anything you don’t want.” Instinctively I grabbed his hands and pushed them back onto my body. "Just do it." Was all I could manage, but Spock didn't move. Instead, I suddenly felt his presence in my head.

“K’diwa.” Let go. Let me guide you.” I did what he wanted me to do and gave up every barrier. A warm feeling immediately enveloped me. It was an incredible feeling to be surrounded by his love so deeply that I unintentionally started crying. "It is okay. Just let it go. I am here. I’ll protect you.” His voice was as gentle as a delicate plant and yet so confident at the same time. At the edge of my mind, I felt Spock's hands slowly moving over my body again, and this time my initial panic was replaced by desire. I wasn't sure if it were his feelings or mine, but it didn't matter. All that crossed my mind was the hope he would never stop.

His touch wasn't intimate in any way, but the deep connection I felt in that moment hit me a lot harder than I expected. I felt how my body began to react to him, how slowly the blood flowed to my cheeks, how my breathing became shallower. A deep rumble rolled through my mind and I opened my eyes. I hadn't even realized I had closed them. And what I saw took my breath away. Spock's gaze was focused intently on my body. His lower lip was trembling, his ears were a bright green. He fought his desire with all his might. Seeing him like that sent a new wave of excitement through my body, which of course he immediately noticed through his hands.

"It's okay, Spock." I didn't trust my voice at all, so I only managed a quiet whisper. But when he heard me, his eyes jumped to my face. His eyes flickering between desire and love. Between the desire to give in to his own excitement and the absolute need to protect me. If I had previously felt uncomfortable about my nudity, that feeling disappeared at that very moment.

I had never felt so good.

So damn sexy.

I reached for his hands, slowly pushing one between my legs while bringing the other to my face. Expecting to connect his mind with mine, he tried to put his hand on my cheek, but I held him tight. Looking deep into his eyes, I took his middle and ring fingers into my mouth. As soon as I closed my lips around his fingers, the expression in his eyes changed suddenly. The restraint was gone and pure lust was written on his face.

I began to slowly suck on his fingers, running my tongue playfully over them, knowing full well what it was doing to him. And sure enough, as soon as he recovered from his shock, I felt his fingers gently running between my legs. Another growl escaped him when he felt how wet I already was. I willingly spread my legs further in front of him, inviting him to explore my body further. And that's what he did. In a single movement he pushed two fingers into me, his eyes fixed on my face.

I struggled to keep my jaw relaxed so as not to bite him. Spock just looked at me without moving his fingers. With a whimper on my lips, I began to shift back and forth on the bed. Trying to make him understand that I wanted more. And finally, he moved his fingers. They gently massaged my sweet spot, dilating me for him. I arched my back out of reflex, but his hand in my mouth prevented me from getting far. With a smug grin on his lips, he pushed my body back and forced me to look at him.

"Uh... uh... Look at me." With a pop, he pulled his fingers out of my mouth and grabbed my chin. His natural dominance sent all sorts of signals through my body, causing me to tense around his fingers. “Damn…” He cursed as he clearly felt my walls trembling around his fingers. His thumb found my clit and pressed gentle circles on it.

That was it completely. I did what he asked of me, letting go of the tension I had built up and trusting him completely. When he realized I had let down my barriers, he started moving his fingers again. His thumb circled my pearl while his fingers massaged my insides, creating a steady rhythm.

I closed my eyes, my lips parted, and I didn't care what noises I made. A fire started between my legs and burned to my core. The longer he touched me, the hotter the fire became and threatened to burn me alive. “You’re doing so well.” His gentle voice praised me and wrapped me in silk robes. My legs began to shake, the first sign that I was close to my orgasm.

I felt the blood rush to my face, turning it a light pink hue. My walls began to flutter around his fingers, trying to keep them inside me. My head was completely foggy, his name a sweet prayer on my lips. I was so close to the edge now; I feared the abyss would swallow me whole. I clawed at his arm that was holding me, accidentally piercing his skin as my orgasm overtook me.

"So beautiful." He murmured and kissed my neck, my earlobes, and my chin. He slowly pulled his fingers out and placed his hand on my throbbing center. My breathing was still uneven and I tried my best to calm it down. Only then did I realize I was still holding onto his arm and immediately let go. "I'm sorry." I whispered as I saw the moon-shaped, red marks in his skin.

He didn't seem to mind because he simply took my hands and kissed each finger. “Don’t worry, T’hy’la. I'm willing to endure far worse for you." Then he let his hands roam over my body, caressing my sensitive sides and making me squirm under his touch. I felt the heat inside me rising again as he worked his way down to my breasts with gentle kisses, taking one hard nipple into his mouth and playing with the other.

My hands went to his hair and pulled. With a slight growl, a free hand disappeared between my legs and collected my arousal. “For all that is holy, you are so fucking wet…” It was rare for my Vulcan to curse, but my goodness, did it sound hot. I impatiently wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him close, eliciting a smile from him. “So needy.”

“Stop stalling me and finally fuck me.” Hunger, desire, and anticipation present in my voice.

“By your orders, my lady.” Reluctantly, he let go of me and peeled off his uniform before joining me on the bed again. He grabbed his member with one hand and leaned on one arm. He looked at me one last time and waited for my approval. Slowly he gently penetrated me. His shaft stretched me almost painfully, eliciting a soft scream from my lips.

"I'm sorry, T'hy'la." He apologized and started to pull away, but I held him with my legs. "It's okay. I… just… be careful.” I shook with a mixture of excitement and fear, but I knew he would never hurt me. So, I took a deep breath and tried to relax around him as much as I could.

"Of course." He murmured against my ear and began to move slowly, setting a deep, sensual pace. It was driving me crazy. Each time he pulled out and pushed back in, he stretched my walls and massaged me heavenly. I held on to his shoulders, my eyes narrowed. A soft moan escaped my lips. "Do that again." He encouraged me, breathing into my neck. "I want to hear the pleasure I give you."

"I never thought you'd be so human in bed..." I tried to keep my voice calm, but his deep movements made me lose my mind and another moan echoed through the room. My sentence made him smile devilishly: “In time you will learn what it means to be my wife. But now I will be nothing but your willing husband, serving for your pleasure.”

Wife.

I had never heard him say it before, but his words were poison to my patience. My insides longed for more as I enjoyed every inch of his wonderful member inside me. He took one leg in his hand and threw it over his shoulder so that he could now penetrate me deeper. Still maintaining his slow, sensual pace, he looked at me, "My pretty little K'diwa." He whispered. “All mine. My wonderful wife.” I knew he was a possessive man, but when I heard him say those words, it hit me on a whole different level.

"Spock!" I moaned his name and watched as his eyes fluttered shut, his hands trembling over my body. "Lucy..." He growled and I moaned his name. "I need more, Spock, please." Grabbing everything of him I could get my hands on. “What, K’diwa? Words, little one. Tell me what you want." He ordered, the Commander in him bursting out. He immediately corrected himself, realizing he was bossing me around. "More." I begged. "I want to feel you, I want you take me.”

He dropped my leg from his shoulder, leaned over me, and pinned my wrists to the mattress with his large hands. He quickened his pace, thrusting faster and harder than before, slowly increasing the speed at which he fucked me. He didn't let go of my gaze in case I pulled away. But I didn't think about doing that. There was no way I was going to stop him now.

His cock was now hitting my sweet spot every time he entered, causing more and more whimpering sounds to fall from my lips. I could see he was holding back his strength and swore to myself in that moment that one day I would tease him until he lost his patience. But now wasn't the right time for that. I was far too focused on the burning sensation that was taking over my body. About how much his self-control turned me on.

My walls fluttered around him and he let out a string of curses. "Spock... Please." I whimpered close to his ear. "I know, me too." He moaned into my neck, kissing, and sucking on the sweet spot behind my ear. “Hold on, T'hy'la. Just one a little longer."

My legs were shaking and I couldn't help it as the precipice of my orgasm pulled me over the edge. I arched my back, wrapped my legs around his waist and dug my nails into his hands, leaving red marks behind. His breathing became stiff as my pulsating walls pulled him into the free fall of his orgasm. I could feel his cock twitching inside me as he emptied himself inside me.

He slowed his movements and let us live out our orgasms before collapsing on top of me. He caught himself soon enough to avoid crushing me, but I could feel the weight of his body pushing me down. I closed my eyes and snuggled into his embrace. "I love you." His voice was a welcome caress after his sensual display of strength. He repeated these words again and again and slowly pulled out of me. Then he started kissing my body wherever he could, caressing me, holding me while making me feel safe.

“You did so well.” His warm breath caressed my stomach and gave me goosebumps. “I promise I will always cherish how you gave yourself to me. This means everything to me and I want everyone to know how much you mean to me.” He said and kissed all over my face. “I will love you until the end of time. And whatever challenge life has in store for us, I will protect you and guide you through it. You are now the only reason for my existence. And therefore, I will never leave you.”

I listened to his sweet ramblings and didn't fight back my tears this time. It was rare for him to speak such emotionally charged words, and with every word he said the attraction to him grew visibly stronger. And soon I felt as close to him as we had before Hanesh tried to destroy us.

"I love you." Was all I could muster before tears began to choke my throat. He took me into his warm embrace, head tucked under his chin, leg pulled over his waist, as he covered us with the warm blanket of my bed. "I love you more, my K'diwa." Was the last thing I heard from him before I fell into a deep sleep. The first deep sleep I've had in weeks.

#fem reader #smut #spock #spock x reader #spock smut #star trek #commander spock

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quandaryqueen · 1 year

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Baby fevers

Edward Nygma X Reader

So. I met and got the chance to hold my baby nephew today. My stupid female self is sending chemicals in my brain to get a child. Thoughts drifted to me writing the Riddlers' dealing with baby fever, so enjoy 💝

💚 Gotham

It's not normally what he thinks of, but he has dealt with children perhaps a few times in his life. For one, he was a reliable babysitter in his neighbourhood when he was a teen! Taught a few kids about setting things on fire-- oh-oh! There was Martin!

Children of his own though... Crossed his thoughts once or twice, but brushed it off after his mind drifts elsewhere. But upon seeing a baby with you, he began to seriously consider it. In hindsight the feeling is short-lived, it'll disappear eventually.

... he initially didn't want to hold your new nephew, but why not? He's being trusted by your cousin and so he does not see any reasons not to oblige.

"Such a curious little thing ooop-! Aheh, those are my glasses!"

Yes, those are his newly cleaned spectacles now smeared with baby finger prints... He forgives the little one, he can't blame the baby being fascinated-- curiosity is a great pathway for knowledge and knowledge is wealth!

His first instinct was to smile at the little babes, his curled finger gently touching the child's chin. Oh he wouldn't be complaining if he's assigned as babysitter, no sir.

He can't have a baby of his own... Yet... But he's happy to settle and watch your nephew with you!

💚 Arkhamverse

It's not what he typically thinks about, rarely or never at all. A child? From him? No. Absolutely not. Never ever.

...

God but why is he melting at the sight of you meeting your baby nephew for the first time and how you held him? And the fact your cousin's teased you you're ready to parent simply because you managed to hold the baby properly for the first time???

When your cousin turned to Edward and asked of him if he wants to hold your nephew, oh he tensed. Before the Riddler can respond, you were already passing the little lad to him, the fragile bundle in his arms who shares semblance from your family where he saw a shred of your appearance.

Your cousins were cooing at the sight of Edward being tensed, gently telling him to relax. You can't even begin at how Edward was at the verge of panic when the baby made a noise in his arms, and panic he did, looking over the mother and you with fear in his eyes. Soon, he began to settle into relaxing, subconsciously tilting his head to observe the baby in his arms.

When they had to take your nephew, Edward felt as though he'd stubbornly insist to hold it still... But he had to let him go because he just got into your cousin's good graces and he wouldn't want that to be revoked.

He's in denial about the baby fever. "Me? Sick with baby fever? You're delusional."

💚 Young Justice

Children... Yeah, no thanks.

First there's his childhood and its unspeakable horrors, probably some of them repressed for his own sake, then there's this fear wherein he'd become the pentapod monster he views his parents as a child and once jokingly promised the blood line ends with him.

And children? Oh lord, children. He fights them on a daily basis too. Those slippery little brats that fusses and screams and-- *shudders*

So yes, no thanks.

...

'Okay but can I still take a look at Y/N's nephew--'

He had made his stance clear that he isn't fond of children and he stands by it, and so you respected him and didn't let him hold the child at all. He was content of seeing it from a distance, but weirdly enough, he grew nearer and nearer when you held your nephew until he was draping an arm around you and sticking a finger out, hovering and hesitant to touch the babe.

Edward was a bit stunned when you held closer and lifted the little one just enough for him to be able to reach for Edward's finger and curl his tiny hand around it.

Let me tell you, Edward.exe stopped working.

Suddenly the thought of children does not seem to be so bad.

💚 Batman Unburied

Children are not his cup of tea, but he supposes they're great elbow rests. I mean, he tolerates them enough. You cannot leave him with a child, he might teach the kid some colourful words to surprise their mom's with.

You know how you are the favourite cousin of your cousin? Edward is taking that spot and become the favourite just to spite you and in result, he is going to one-up you. Baby gifts? Oh look at him, he would make the best uncle! Hospital bills? Tee hee, no problem! He just an annoying shit trying to one-up you, but that wasn't the only reason! He really does want to get accepted in the family, he loves you okay?

Oh he is bragging about being your nephew's favourite uncle when the little thing grows up, but when the time came to hold the child, he was backing up against a corner. He knows there's a certain part of him that's dangerous and he's scared of being entrusted to babies. Children at the range of toddlers, preadolescent and adolescents? That's fine! He can just hand them an iPod and he won't worry about a thing, but a baby?

It took time to coax him and get him comfortable to hold a child, most of what he needed were reassurance and he was a little convinced and hesitate, but not enough for him not to agree to hold the nephew. At first he was tensed, brows furrowed and eyes were looking over you and your cousin to ask whether he was doing something wrong... Then he settled on his nerves and began to appreciate the kid.

Huh... He wants to protect this thing and kill whoever dares to impedes his dreams.

Suddenly, his worries flushed away and his flamboyant act returns, he is now determined to be your nephew's favourite uncle and there is nothing stopping him.

"Aren't you a cute little thing? Ooh yes you are! Yes you are, look you~"

#edward nygma #riddler x reader #dc x reader #edward nygma x reader #dc x you #edward nigma #young justice riddler #young justice riddler x reader #gotham edward nygma x reader #arkhamverse riddler x reader #batman unburied riddler x reader

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dawnbreakersgaze · 8 days

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Your post about ur husband's new lightsaber just reminds me of when I bought my wife a 25th anniversary limited edition of the princess bride book with new illustrations. I kept hearing her in the other room gasping about the illustrations and how accurate they were, and hearing her giggle and squeal literally made my heart lurch with joy and happiness. I'm fuckin. So stupid in love with that woman.

~vulpesverda (sorry it's a side blog LMAO)

Ashskslakjhgjks this is so cute 🥺🥺🥺

Shit like this makes me so happy that love exists and that humanity is real and that our brains developed to require and need social interaction and comfort to produce certain chemicals and and and-

Your wife sounds fkn cute and yall are adorable ♡♡♡

#kay's answers #romance will never die idc what anyone says #im a sap

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k--havok · 1 year

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Happy STS! Share your favorite piece of meta-lore for your WIPs/books/stories! (by meta-lore I mean, inspirations, how you arrived at your vision, what drove you to form it into what it is today, etc, things like that!)

Oh I love this ask thank you so much!!!

I'm gonna blab a bit about Waking into Divinity as I've been having brain worms about it for a couple of days now.

So the story stemmed from a weird dream I had a long time ago, just like a lot of my WIPs. From there, it spawned from several different sources. Such as and they were roommates as that is a legendary video. There is only one bed is another because we are TRASH in this household. And you cannot forget the ever-present soulmates trope, which I have a love-hate relationship with.

I love the idea of soulmates but dislike a lot of the execution of said trope (looking at you, SJM!) I've read a lot of different posts made by detractors of said trope to see if I was the only one who had some qualms. Some of said posts were really stupid, but some had a lot of good points which I wanted to include and cover in my version of the trope.

And this is also why its not called soulmates in the story. it is called tal'rith, which is a different word in a different language and it basically translates to an "eternal bond." Tal'rith can be between siblings, between friends, a parent and a child, and even someone and their pet. I have a lot more complex ideas and details regarding tal'rith and I'll eventually make an entire post covering everything.

I know right now the craze is about fae and werewolves and before that it was vampires, but I've always enjoyed writing about demons. Probably due to my fanfic roots, but they're so malleable. White guy with horns and a tail? Your body-horror nightmare? Animal features? You can basically do anything you want. there is so much stuff to pull from, from different religions to media and more. Usually, demons are depicted as evil in most forms of media. I wanted to do a different spin on it.

Demons in the world of Waking into Divinity are not evil, but have a culture completely different to humans and a lifestyle that could be seen as blasphemous in one or more religions. They are atheists at heart; they do not really believe in a God or gods. Demons worship their Demon Lords, which could be seen as a "false idol" for sure. Or even monarchy-like. But in all actuality, I based the relationship on that of bees in a hive. If a bee does not like its home, it can leave at any time and find a new home. And other demon lords are fine welcoming outsiders as long as they swear a new allegiance. A demon lord who abuses his demons is quick to find themself alone with no one. And although demon lords are powerful, a lone demon lord is a weak demon lord, especially politically.

One major idea I yanked from an existing story is that the act of war or violence against others is outlawed in Gehenna. And it is an idea I got from reading the first Drizzt book. In the first book of the Drizzt series, in the first few chapters in fact, it talks about how in drow society, being caught sabotaging other families means a death sentence. However, not being caught, even if everyone knows you did it, is fine.

In the world of Gehenna, no one can outwardly attack another demon lord. It is outlawed. This ruling is incredibly flawed. One, as it came into being, all demon lords who did not agree to submit to Court would be put to death unless they decided to agree. This is... a bit counterproductive and hypocritical to say the least. Two, this law basically does nothing for all the other ways demon lords attack one another.

Cutting off food supplies, chemical warfare, such as poisoning water sources, stealing supplies/cattle, and secret assassinations? These issues are massive. and unfortunately, there can be no retaliation due to the laws in place. Self-defense of intruders in a certain territory is permitted if you can prove to Court that they were there for nefarious purposes. And even then, how could you prove that a demon's demon lord sent them to do these things and that a demon wasn't acting on their own free will? Quite a difficult thing to prove. And Court moves slowly as there are many demon lords and all get a say until a large enough majority has come to an agreement (still debating on how much of a majority is needed, I've been looking into some history to determine this)

Court being a bit inept I pulled from other media sources as well as history as, I mean... government being inept is practically everywhere nowadays. So take your pick.

I have babbled a LOT and I apologize I just have SO much to say as I've been digging deeper into the wider story and themes. A lot of the current political climate is also influencing this work, especially with the US supreme court, so there was quite a lot to talk about.

For now, TL;DR:

This story focuses on different forms of relationships we have during our lifetimes and how any of them can be described as "soulmates."

I also wish to deconstruct the soulmates trope while keeping the main characters in a romantic/sexual soulmate bond.

Demons here are not evil, but have a culture and attitudes that are antithesis to some cultures present in human society, most notably evangelical Christianity

Government oversight, hypocrisy, and anti-self defense attitudes are included in some of the themes of this story. These themes are pulled from media, history, and the current political climate happening in the US.

#writeblr #fantasy #demons #am writing #writers on tumblr #waking into divinity #shutuplanx #WID

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kstewdeux · 1 year

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@sometimes-icanstillhear-sitboy

InuPrompt 2022: Wish (11.11.22)

Summary: Kagome orders some cheap exercise clothes from the predecessor of Wish and learns some things.

“Why do I gotta be here? Why not use Sango?” Inuyasha huffed irritably as he shifted his weight. This whole thing was so utterly embarrassing. It wasn’t like he was an expert in fashion. Besides, whatever opinion he ultimately gave would be taken as an insult somehow. That woman could interpret everything he said to everyone else so easily but when it came to herself, Kagome might as well as have been blind. She could be so stupid. So willfully ignorant.

“You’re the one having to carry me around all the time,” Kagome called back - the sound of ripping plastic and the scent of chemicals erupting followed. Inuyasha gagged and had to repress his shudder.

“The hell are you doing back there?” he snapped irritably, “If that’s the clothes, I already say no. Cloth shouldn’t smell like that.”

“Well, sometimes synthetic fabric smells like gasoline at first. It goes away so keep an open mind,” Kagome called back, “I just thought that it would be better to wear something more practical and I’m tired of chaffing.”

Inuyasha laughed softly at that. He’d been wondering since the beginning how that stiff fabric and obscene skirt was working out for her. Far as he could tell it didn’t breathe and he’d seen the evidence of irritation himself. Still, if she wanted something more comfortable, he would’ve found her something instead of her ordering stuff from a magazine. Especially if he had known the magazine crap smelled like death. She probably thought that he’d get her something tacky but more likely, he would’ve scoured the earth to find a fire rat robe so they could match.

See, now that would’ve been cute and serve many purposes. Mainly, it would show the world that she was his and he was hers. That they were a unit in many interpretations of the word. Even if her understanding kept getting lost in translation.

Inuyasha smiled to himself and hummed. What a weird thought. Matching. But weirder still, the idea of matching with her made him very, very happy. Especially if they had kids one day. They could all match. Hell, if the kid didn’t have ears like him, they could use a bow to…

His smile faded and he quickly locked those images away where they couldn’t hurt him.

“If you wanted new clothes, I could’ve found you some,” Inuyasha huffed in frustration as he cricked his neck, “Still might. Ain’t no way chemicals are better for your skin.”

“They were so cheap they were basically free,” Kagome called back - her voice muffled by what Inuyasha assumed was a top, “Now I want you to think about how great this would work in battle. Able to move better. Probably run faster. Less me losing focus trying to keep my skirt from flying up.”

Snickering softly, Inuyasha had to admit he’d enjoyed that view often enough to know exactly what she meant.

“So you’re trying to be more modest?” Inuyasha offered with no lack of amusement, “If you are so concerned-“

“Well that too,” Kagome offered and Inuyasha made a face, “And villagers won’t be whispering about whether I’m a floozy.”

Inuyasha snickered at the strange term. He didn’t have to know the word to understand what she meant. Good little girls didn’t wear skirts that didn’t even go below the fingertips. Never accidentally showed off their beautiful, flat, flawless stomachs. Especially didn’t let men grab their bare thighs.

Inuyasha wrinkled his nose.

“So you’re covering up then is the idea,” he stated more than asked - disappointed at the implication that he wouldn’t be granted his favorite privilege anymore. Still didn’t explain-

“Again, why am I the one who has to cast judgment? This is a girl thing,” Inuyasha sighed heavily, “I’m sure whatever it is will be…”

Kagome began coming out and Inuyasha’s brain flatlined.

“Well Sango is a little more traditional. She already doesn’t approve of the outfit I normally wear and I don’t trust that she’d give me an honest opinion,” Kagome continued as she began smoothing out some of the wrinkles, “She’d just shoot it down.”

Inuyasha was not proud of the noise he made when Kagome fully emerged from behind the silk screen. Something between a moan and a whine. His knees turned to jelly and he promptly sank to his butt while the woman in question looked at him like he was insane.

That is, until her eyes widened in understanding and her face erupted in flames.

“They’re for exercising,” she blurted before blushing harder when she realized Inuyasha’s dilated amber eyes were focused on a very specific part of her anatomy, “Are you even listening to me?”

Inuyasha nodded absently while his chest heaved. Thank god the monk wasn’t here. Gouging a friend’s eyes out wasn’t something Inuyasha particularly fancied doing but if Kagome was going to wear something like that, Inuyasha was going to make damn sure he was the only man allowed to see her in all her glory.

God, how long had he wanted this? Permission, arguably, to look at her with next to nothing on. An acknowledgement that he had the right. Honestly, it’d gotten to the point where he believed she’d never catch the hints he’d dropped. There were only so many ways to interpret ‘I need you’. Only so many ways to demonstrate that he could be a good provider in every way. Making her medicine. Taking every blow meant for her in battle. Following her to a world that smelled like ass and going out of his way to impress her family. Doing everything they asked and helping them with whatever they needed. Sure, he royally screwed up where Kikyo was concerned but he hadn’t left Kagome once since he declared he’d chosen her. Not once!

But still, somehow, she hadn’t seemed to catch what he was throwing at her.

Until now.

Inuyasha let out another pleased moan as his heart melted. She knew. She finally knew.

Wish granted.

“I mean I know it’s tight,” Kagome mumbled as she quickly began moving backwards towards the screen, “But when it’s just us, I thought it’d be more practical than what I normally wear. The leggings…”

Blinking a few times, Inuyasha’s foggy gaze lowered to the shapely legs that were fully covered. Those he could definitely do without. He liked being able to touch her skin. Gave him a weird comfort in the midst of their day to day struggles. Made him believe, if just for a moment, that she really did trust him.

Kagome turned away from him and Inuyasha immediately changed his opinion. She could wear those all day and he’d never get tired of looking.

“People wear stuff like this all the time in my era,” the miko muttered miserably as she disappeared and Inuyasha let out a soft huff of frustration, “I just thought destroying these would be better than my uniform. I’ve gone through sixteen of them and they’re so expensive.”

Inuyasha would like to say he was listening or that he cared about the cost but the image of Kagome wearing what amounted to a skin tight suit was burned into his mind.

“Looks nice,” Inuyasha called out - wincing when his voice changed in pitch mid-word. That hadn’t happened since he was…well younger and growing. Although, technically something in him was growing at the moment so maybe that had something to do with it. But what did she expect? That top was completely transparent and…

Inuyasha let out another muffled moan and closed his eyes to revisit the memory.

A face peeked around the edge of the screen and she gave him a curious look.

“I have some others. Things I ordered. Maybe they’d be better?” she admitted slowly and eyes flying open, Inuyasha immediately perked up with almost childlike enthusiasm.

“Yeah. Yeah let’s see those,” Inuyasha breathed - his voice still doing whatever the hell it was doing. The innocent face he put on was both precious and disturbing. Since when did she give him a reaction like this?

Figuring this little fashion show would do wonders to her self esteem, Kagome unpackaged another top and squeezed it over her head. Size medium her butt. This tank top was basically a bra and exposed fat rolls that probably didn’t even exist. Heinous was too kind a word and the color was nothing like what had been advertised on the website. What was supposed to be emerald green was a strange combination of neon green vomit and mop water. There were no words to describe how utterly disgusting this color was and no way in hell she was exposing Inuyasha’s HD vision to this. For all she knew, those amber orbs could bubble and start melting out of their sockets from seeing something so hideous.

Squinting her eyes, Kagome pulled the fabric forward and found the pièce de résistance. A weird watermarkish pattern that looked like a kawaii sheep with anatomically correct squid tentacles. What was that?

“You can’t see this one,” she called out as she began trying to tug it over her head only to quickly begin wondering how she’d even gotten the stupid top from hell on. Somehow, someway this stupid piece of cheap nylon had fused itself to her skin or something. Much to her horror and relief, upon almost tripping over her book bag with the shirt over her face, a single claw was there. Effortlessly cutting through the fabric to help rid her of her veritable prison. It was so tightly on there, though, Kagome would’ve sworn she heard the vacuum seal pop.

As relieved as she was to be free, though, that second that poor excuse for fabric hit the ground, his lips were on hers. Which brought with them a whole new type of panic. His fingertips exploring every inch of her torso they could until they finally delved into her hair to keep her in place.

“Those are for me,” Inuyasha laughed almost playfully against her lips before his hands reached down to hoist her legs over his hips, “Only for me.”

As he quickly maneuvered so that her back hit the wall, Kagome’s eyes widened as her mind started to race. Especially when, after he secured her, his hands slid up to pin her wrists above her head. Yeah…this was moving way too fast and far too soon. There was still…well a skyscraper high tower of mess they needed to clear up before, well, any of this. And this wouldn’t and didn’t mean anything to him. He clearly had made some presumption or, you know, was just male and instinct driven.

Inuyasha’s lips began tracing her jaw before moving down her neck and she lost her train of thought.

“S-stop,” she finally managed in between little whimpers and moans. His reaction was immediate. Panting heavily against her skin, Inuyasha froze and went rigid.

Scared of him. She was scared of him.

“W-what?”

“I said stop,” she repeated. Inuyasha’s breathing hitched a few times before he took a step back and gently placed her feet back on the floor. His face, however, remained hidden in her hair. She could feel his breath coming out in fast uneven puffs. Ticking her hair and skin as he tried to get ahold of his reaction.

“I didn’t…” he tried - his voice cracking wildly as he pushed his nose closer and a strange whine worked it way out, “I just thought that y-you…”

Without further warning, he turned and hurried out of the room. It was then and only then that Kagome registered something wet sliding from her hair into her cheek. Running the odd clear liquid between her fingertips, she was far too frazzled to immediately recognize it but when she did, you had better bet she was throwing on the nearest shirt so she could chase after him.

Unfortunately, he hadn’t gone far and she nearly tripped over his body which was planted firmly just outside the door.

He caught her. Of course. But her life flashed before her eyes on the unexpected way down.

“Stupid,” he chided hoarsely as he quickly took a moment to wipe at his face, “Why’d you go and do that?”

There was a double question there. Kagome knew it. Inuyasha knew it. The remanent of the poorly made garment even a child couldn’t fit into knew it.

“You shouldn’t be out here,” Inuyasha huffed as he grabbed her arm and moved to roughly yank her inside, “That shirt is almost see through and-“

“I didn’t want you to go,” she offered sheepishly as he forced her to sit and then slammed the door shut.

“Well I’m here,” Inuyasha snapped much harsher than he intended before plopping down in front of her and glaring, “Happy n-“

His anger faded quicker than Kagome could blink as his eyes lingered on her throat.

“Now?” he finished lamely. A look of misery, longing and shame adorning his features. Furrowing her brow, Kagome made to speak before realizing what he was probably looking at.

A hickey. He had been rather…attentive.

Moving her hand to cover the bruise she knew was there, she was surprised when he reached up to gently grab her wrist- staring at the spot with the oddest expression.

“Don’t. Please,” he requested with a shuddering sigh, “Just don’t.”

“I mean, I’m going to have to cover it up if it is what I think it is,” Kagome mumbled in confusion before shaking her head and getting to the point, “Inuyasha, all I meant was that…we, um, can’t be doing…that.”

Nodding stiffly, Inuyasha averted his eyes and tucked his hands into his sleeves.

“Fine. That’s…that’s fine,” he agreed barely above a whisper before glancing at the futon and adding, “Y-you should get some sleep.”

“Inuyasha, what I’m trying to say-“

“You’re really useless when you don’t sleep,” he added a little desperately as his body curled into itself like a dog anticipating being hit by a newspaper, “And…and I don’t want to have to carry you everywhere. You’ve got two legs, ya know? And-“

“Inuyasha. Will you look at me?”

“No,” he huffed as he stared at his right knee, “Go to bed.”

“Inuyasha. Look at me,” she ordered firmly as her hand reached up to try to force his chin, “Look. At. Me.”

“No.”

With him not looking, he completely missed the split second decision that played out behind her eyes. The realization then pleased understanding.

What he did not miss was her suddenly straddling him and wrapping her arms around his neck. Stunned, confused and more than a little hurt, Inuyasha lifted his head only to find his lips being captured in a way that heated his cooling blood.

“I’ll only wear them for you,” she breathed before nudging his chin up so she could attack his throat, “If that’s what you want.”

Nodding absently, Inuyasha was too busy trying to breathe in a dignified fashion to worry about anything else. For so long, he’d assumed trying to start anything with her was a suicide mission. That Kikyo and his general jackassery had ruined any chance he might’ve had. But this…

This seemed to prove otherwise. Mostly. It was within the realm of possibility that she didn’t actually want him. That she was just trying to comfort him or something equally bizarre. She’d kissed him like that before after all. When he was injured and needing to be saved. Maybe he was turning and he didn’t even know.

When she hit a particularly sensitive spot, his back arched and a soft whimper passed over his lips.

“Now. I think we need a talk,” Kagome cooed as her fingertips moved to stroke his hypersensitive ears. It sounded like a proposition from his dreams but given everything, he didn’t really want this to end. The world liked to play cruel jokes on him. Give him hope then snatch it away. If he went along, if he agreed, he’d set himself up for more heartbreak and honestly, he didn’t think he could handle any more.

She pulled away. Clenching his eyes shut, Inuyasha tried to mentally brace himself for impact. After all, what she’d just done wasn’t like her at all. None of this was like her at all. Maybe he’d found himself in the arms of a succubus which overrode his judgment and gave him ideas he wouldn’t normally entertain. That made more sense than what was happening.

“T-talk?” he managed after a few moments before pulling her closer and resting his nose against the nape of her neck. The last thing he wanted was for her to say that he’d ruined everything. That her kissing him was just to soften the incoming blow. He could tell by scent alone that she’d been scared of him and he really didn’t want to hear her say those words out loud. To tell him she was leaving or that she didn’t trust him anymore or that...

“Well…for one thing, you were right. These clothes aren’t the best. I think this stupid shirt ripped,” Kagome admitted as she trailed her fingertips up and down his back, “And the seam of my leggings popped already.“

Letting out a soft groan, Inuyasha didn’t move and tried to hold onto his fairytale for a few seconds longer. At least right now, until she told him otherwise, he could pretend that everything was fine. That maybe she even loved him. But why would she after all the crap he pulled? Like just now. Talk about making presumptions. Even if she did love him, she probably thought he only wanted her because he was turned on. Lust was different than love. Yeah, sure, there’d been both but she wouldn’t know that and she was obsessed with Kikyo. It would take a miracle for her to figure out he would choose her in a heartbeat if things were easier.

But Naraku liked to play with his food. Had already killed one woman. Killed thousands others in ever more creative ways. Played on insecurities and, more importantly, doubt. And Kikyo, well, her opinion on whether he should die or not changed from one second to the next. Was completely unpredictable and he had promised to avenge her. To protect her…

And he’d already screwed up so hard where that was involved. He’d made too many mistakes and…

“But mainly I want you to talk because I love you,” Kagome finished softly as she gave his trembling body a light squeeze.

For the longest moment, Inuyasha’s breathing hitched as he waited for her to correct herself. To realize what she’d said and take it back.

But she didn’t. Quite the contrary. She pulled him closer and whispered the sentiment again. Unsure what was happening, Inuyasha slowly wrapped his arms around her waist and gently nuzzled her throat. A tense contradictory peace began flowing through his veins making it easier to breathe and making his muscles relax.

“I love you too,” Inuyasha offered hesitantly. Kagome hummed and pressed a kiss against his cheek.

It was almost beyond belief.

Maybe, just maybe, something in his life was simple for once. Easy for once. For the longest, he’d assumed any confession he made would be met with a long list of everything he’d done wrong. Being told that he was mistaken and have to live the rest of his life trying to prove he wasn’t. Have to fight like hell and bend himself out of shape to gain her trust. But there was no fight. No accusations. Just love. Beautiful unconditional love.

A lingering tear slid down his cheek. He held her closer and pressed a single chaste kiss against her neck.

“I…I’ll talk but...” Inuyasha trailed off into a breathy chuckle. A faint blush blooming across his nose.

“But I want to see the rest of that shit on you first,” Inuyasha mumbled after a long period of him breathing in her scent to calm his frazzled nerves, “And then we’re burning them all.”

“Deal,” Kagome agreed and Inuyasha felt the broken pieces of his heart begin to sew themselves back together.

And so, in between sessions of making up for lost time, they did just that.

#inu pockylypse #novinuprompt22 #fanfiction #fanfic #writing #inuyasha #kagome #inukag #inuyasha fanfiction #inuyasha fanfic #inukag fanfic #kstewdeux

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secretlywritingstories · 3 months

Text

I don't like taking pain killers. Mostly because I still haven't gotten great at swallowing those pesky pills, but also because I more so like to power through before resorting to ingesting anything.

It's a stupid thing really, because you should seek pain relief, if you're in pain but for me with a regular headache or period pains and I'll more likely just curl up in bed and rest while it sorts itself out. I know that's a very lucky position because for most parts that can handle it. The normal pain level I experience is none, and then on occasion I can have a mild pain, maybe a little annoying but rest and time can take it way.

Yesterday, I had a very minor "surgery" to remove two of my wisdom teeth. They did call it a surgery because it was the lower wisdom teeth in the jaw and those are always operated out, but it still feels a bit silly. I was advised to take a combination of paracetamol and ibuprofen about an hour later, as the anesthesia wore off.

My mouth was sore and cheeks swollen but the bleeding dried up quick and the pain killers kept me pain free, as long as I don't directly touch my cheeks or the area inside my mouth. It also made me google how pain killers worked for the first time.

I had a vague idea of how but it was still strange seeing it on the search page: when we are in pain or injured, a protein called COX2 releases chemicals called prostaglandins. These chemicals send a signal to your brain, telling you you're in pain. For some reason, it itched something in my (temporarily pain free) brain.

Because it's only really the brain that is pain free. It puts a damper on the experience of feeling the pain but the hurt obviously doesn't go away just by blocking those chemicals. You're not reacting like your body is programmed because of them. And it makes sense, you want to be comfortable, able to function, while healing takes place but it still feels strange.

Even now, nearing 36 hours after the surgery, I have been on pain killers. I'm due to take another round soon, if I feel the need, and I might because sleeping yesterday while the dose wore off wasn't exactly fun. Though I'm not sure mollifying the feel of pain will really help if I'm tossing and turning and bumping the area that's in pain.

Pain killers numb the feeling of pain. A clever trick we designed ourselves. Pretty freaking cool. I have no doubt that it's an actual life saver for those dealing with chronic illnesses/pain or having to heal from major injuries or illnesses. I love that they exist, so this is definitely not me trashing them or their use.

I am happy to use them right now, ease this already annoying period of healing and mandatory rest a little. But easing my reception of the healing wounds in my mouth have not magically sealed them back up. My body will though, another quite cool thing. Until it's further along, I'm happy to have the pain killers, even if the pills might cause me trouble.

#pain #pain killers #spilled thoughts #dentist #wisdom tooth surgery #personal

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stuckinapril · 1 year

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hey girl… may I ask for advice? sorry to dump this on you, feel free to ignore of course! I just don‘t know where to put this right now and it‘s been eating at me for the past two months

I met a guy around 8 months ago and we instantly connected really intensely and even fell in love in a really short amount of time (obviously all of that was based on very brief interactions and didn‘t have anything to do with actual love but it was still nice and i felt like something could grow from it), however due to our personal circumstances we decided to be friends. The last time I saw him was 7 months ago. We ended up making out that night. The next morning he made it very clear he didnt want a relationship and i didn’t either. We kept texting every day and i asked to see him again but when we finally managed to find a day to hang out he would cancel the same day because he wasn‘t feeling well mentally (which I would never judge or question because I have my bad weeks too) but this happened like 5-6 times and I felt like he just didnt want to see me again, or at least it wasn’t important to him right now. I involuntarily pulled back from our texting relationship over the summer because of work but still it was always me except for one time who was asking to hang out. Then I started actually pulling back because I was hurt from him rejecting me all the time. At this point it’s not even just about the romantic feelings, I feel like we’re not even friends anymore. I feel stuck, I feel myself wanting to pull back and I feel stupid when he rejects me being nice to him (we always tease each other but he used to be more caring and accept care from me too). I want to be there for him and let him know that I‘m not going anywhere (because i’m not, i want him in my life) but at the same time i notice myself falling into an obsession because of him being so inconsisent. Do you think I can take a step back without losing him and abandoning our friendship entirely? I don‘t want to make a big thing out of it because I know he‘s been very busy working but then again it‘s not too much to want to see him once in 7 months and I made time for him when i was drowning in work. I wonder what happened or what has changed for him. I just don‘t know where to put all of this care that I have for him

reading your ask gave me deja vu bc i went through every single phase you’re describing w my ex. hell, i was going through it as late as october. your feelings are valid. your feelings are really valid and raw and i deeply relate to every single thing you’re saying. but that’s why i need to bluntly tell you—there is no future friendship (or relationship, for that matter) to be maintained with this man. just trust me on this. i went through the “maybe we could be friends!!” phase too. i so badly wanted him to stay in my life too. it didn’t work. it won’t work for you either. you need to go no contact. absolutely cut him out of your life. you will not move on any other way.

how do i know this? bc that’s the only thing that really, truly helped me. you’re going to feel withdrawals at first. it’s literally like a dopamine fix. the moment you remove him from your life, the chemicals in your brain will go crazy. they so badly crave the presence of this person. but is what he’s giving you even a presence? y’all have literally not seen each other for 7 months. imagine all the other guys you could have met in that time. imagine the opportunities lost. 7 billion people in this world, and you’re stuck fixating on this person who’s giving you breadcrumbs. literal breadcrumbs. it’s seriously time to consider you.

but this is not sustainable. it’s damaging. it’s hard to believe, but this man is neither the cause nor the solution to your pain. even if he were prevalent in your life, this would not fix the root issue—which is that so much of your happiness is attached to this person. you’re dependent on him. you can’t need a person. you can want them, but you can never need them. you need to detach and find yourself. that’s what i had to do as well. back when i was going through the thick of my breakup, it seemed crazy to me not to have him in my life. i genuinely thought he enriched it. but if he was truly the only source of enrichment, did that mean i was living a full life to begin with? a person shouldn’t be the only reason i find my days exciting. i should be the only one responsible for my emotions—and if a person walks out, i should be fine. it shouldn’t consume me. that’s not healthy. that’s a problem.

i reiterate: it wouldn’t even matter if he was the best companion you could’ve asked for. the simple fact of the matter is you’re relying way, way too much on another person for happiness and fulfillment. this is something you need to go through alone.

you need to cut him off. i was in denial about this too. you may be for a while as well. but all keeping him in your life, in any capacity, will do is hurt you. this is not the behavior of a man who cares or wants to be helped. and people simply can’t be fixed. only they can give themselves the permission to be better. your only option—for the sake of you—is to walk out, endure the pain, grow from it, and fulfill yourself without needing someone else. i swear. i have been there so many times. that’s the only thing that will help.

#ask

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vlkodddlak · 1 year

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For shockwave!

15. Does this tf character ever make anything creative (e.g. writing, drawing, sculpturing)? If so, do they show other people what they’ve made?

16. What do you think this tf character’s opinions regarding humankind is?

THANK U FOR ASKING!! your ask game is super cool!!

im gonna go with tfp shockwave cause he's my fave. my version of him isnt that scary and evil he's just kind of a guy who likes to play around with science and engineering, doesnt know basic safety, and is bad at socializing. he's still kind of a cartoon type villain tho

15. ohh he's creative for sure. it's not always that obvious, but i do like to think that shockwave likes to create things for fun sometimes. about 98% of the stuff he works on are projects that will help the decepticon cause, but he does occassionally get a spark of creativity and decides to make something for himself. it's not art in a traditional sense, like poetry, music, etc, but it's enough to count as art (in my opinion)

the 'art' he creates may include stuff like: 1) creating little gadgets that have no practical use, they just look cool

2) playing with chemicals just to get some interesting reaction. like putting some liquids together just cause it makes them change colors in a pretty way or something

3) adding decorative designs to his creations, again, simply for the esthetics

ok ok i know these sound silly, but when you think about the fact that shockwave is a serious, 'logical' character and not someone artsy, these little actions DO count as creative! think about it!!

he NEVER shows others, tho. it's not that he's insecure about his craft, it's simply not something that he wants to share. i wouldnt say that the creative things he does are personal (he probably doesnt see any artistic value in his little projects, it's just for fun after all) but his art comes from feelings and thoughts deep within him that even he doesn't like to admit (like idk... the fact that he can be happy and enjoy something? no one should know that! 😡). basically, he's not comfortable showing his creativity to others, unless it's someone he knows for a long time and absolutely trusts, which isnt a lot of people...sigh hes so weird

16. oh he couldn't care less. like, fr. i mean if the decepticons want to transform Earth and eradicate all life including humans then he'll just... go along with it yknow? his main focus is helping megatron, it's all he really cares about....BUT! i do think that there's a chance he COULD develop some sort of care for humanity? i can't say it confidently, but i do think he would be able to connect with humans through his favorite things - science and technology!

human technology is WAY behind cybertronian one, but shockwave might find himself curious about it! well, to be specific, he would find interest in HOW humans came to their discoveries and research. humans are such a small, young species after all! how come they've done and discovered so much in so little time? (this is all relatively speaking lol)

of course, over time he would be interested in more than just human technology. he would also look into human history, art, language...probably anything regarding humans. if he's focused on something, he is focused A LOT. shockwave human hyperfixation real

eventually his slight interest for human science would turn into fascination and later... appreciation? maybe? it would take him a pretty long time and he would definitely need someone or something (preferably a human friend) to convince him to even look into human stuff, since he doesnt view humanity as anything important from the start... but yea! i like to think that this big purple mf would go from "humans small and weak and stupid and unimportant" to "humans small and weak...and kinda cool"

ahhh i can't believe i wrote so much omg.... embarrassing! 😞😞anyway yea shockwave is my fucking fictional fidget toy, whenever i'm bored i poke him and squish him in my brain

#transformers #hes so #AGHHH #hes my best friend..

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energyanon · 8 months

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*hugs* I'm glad you are sticking around. (Both here and everywhere.) Great to hear you have deep diving into astrology!! It's such a great tool :) What draw you deeper into it?

Me too, that damn brain of mine likes to be a vengeful bitch sometimes but I have given her the happy chemical, so she may rest now.

It’s actually a long story;

TLDR; basically I had a dream that set me off all things spiritual and finding a purpose in life

But the story is; while I was still in the deep deep stages of depression where nothing was worth it and I had 0 connection or belief in the universe, I had a dream. And this dream was that I was 50/60 frolicking about with a bunch of other older women in the country side and we were just a little community. We did all the things we wanted to do, we played, we nurtured the child parts of ourselves, we made dinners for each other. And the thing was there wasn’t a man involved in this, I wasn’t married or anything I was just enjoying sisterhood with a bunch of other women. And it was fucking freeing. Because we were only with each other there was no need to uphold beauty standards or be anything more than what we were or to act in certain ways we just enjoyed life and let the sun age us etc. and I woke up and I was like

Holy fuck. My whole life I’ve been feeling desperately unloved because I had that stupid little voice in my head that told me if I don’t have a relationship then I’m less than. And broken family etc didn’t help that feeling. So I’ve always searched for being “loved” elsewhere and in order to do that I’m a people pleaser and I have to live life in a certain way. But this dream was like.. actually no you don’t.. you can literally just BE there’s actually 0 rules in this world and if you aren’t harming anyone or harming yourself then nothing is that serious.

So then through that came this like.. intense spiritual freedom I guess where nothing was that bad, like all cares about what other people thought aswell just 🤷‍♀️ none of it matters. And I realised that I don’t want a life that needs to be successful what I actually want is simple, it’s just community.

And so I would say it was one hell of a spiritual awakening. And then I was watching a tiktok and it just so happened to be about Ariana grandes new BF and how his something or other is in her 5th house and I was like holy fuck is that how you read astrology, so I started to research it knowing now where to start, and like beyond personal planets and houses are the ASPECTS, and my god do the aspects make all the difference and then how the whole birth chart and those aspects play out with one another and then singleton planets and then asteroids which can show you your greatest trauma and it was all like holy shit tits we’re all connected.

And so that’s how it happened. And now it’s wild j went from 0 faith in the universe all together to seriously feeling like I’ve been placed on such a specific path and I can see how everything up until now has been apart of that path and I’ve always been protected and guided no matter how shit it was at the time

I’m currently desperately trying to find anything I can about Yods and it’s driving me insane I can’t find anything on how to properly read it in relation to all the planets aspecting each other.

anyway if anyone knows anything about Yods let me know cause I have two of those fuckers in my charts and I’m not sure how to read them

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slightlyaboveaverageiq · 1 year

Text

The Whisperer: Part 16 (Wally Clark Fic)

”You know tomorrow is Monday which means I have to go back to school right? It also mean you’re going to have to learn to keep your fingers out of me long enough to do my school work-“ My snarky remark was cut off as Wally angled his fingers just right and hit that spot inside me that made my toes curl.

“I’m sorry what else were you going to say sweetheart? I think you lost your train of thought for a moment.” Stupid smug bastard that he is I’m sure he had a smirk the size of the sun on his face but i couldn’t even comment on that because the hand that wasn’t in me was currently holding the back of my neck so I stayed face down.

“What you’re just gonna pull my pants down in the middle of class and finger fuck me? You don’t think that wouldn’t be a little obvious?” Knowing Wally I’m sure the thought had crossed his mind because over the course of the weekend I think the total amount of time he hasn’t been touching me in some sexual way is probably less than an hour.

“I’m a ghost sweetheart, they won’t see what I’m doing. It’ll look like you’re just sitting in your seat like you normally would.” He leaned down and licked a long stripe from the bottom of my back all the way up to my neck before capturing my earlobe in his mouth. “Besides I like the idea of making you cum over and over again in front of everyone. Of course you have to be quiet but you can do that can’t you?” I didn’t say anything completely lost in the thought of how if Wally would just hit that spot about 2 more times I would cum all over his fingers and how I could lick it off for him. Suddenly his fingers were pulled out and I whined at the loss. “I asked you a question sweetheart.”

“Fine yes I’ll be good just please put your fingers back in, God damn Wally you always-FUCK!” It was not in fact his fingers that entered me but his cock and he was going at a punishing pace.

“You’re so mouthy Mo, and while I love it you can always be snarky.” His sentence was followed by a harsh slap to my ass and I groaned. Here I was getting myself in trouble again and Wally had decided over the course of the weekend depending on how snarky I was he wouldn’t let me cum. I had already smart mouthed myself out of one before bed last night.

“ ‘m sorry.” I mumbled against the pillow tightening my grip on it as he hit my g spot over and over again. “Wally, I’m sorry” only it came out as a whinny apology because I knew by now he was just dragging it out because he wanted to torment me. His breathing was jagged and he wasn’t keeping a rhythmic pace anymore, he was holding his own orgasm back just to punish me. “Please Wally cum for me, come on Wally fill me up” three more calculated stroke and he was filling me as I screamed my climax into the pillow, something along the lines of Wally, fuck, and please in some sort of garbled mess. He pulled out and laid down pulling me to lay on his chest.

“I don’t want you to go back to school tomorrow, I just want to be able to touch you all day.” I rolled my eyes and smacked his arm.

“How oppressive, good job we’re going back about 300 years.” He looked down at me and kissed the top of my head. I understood though it almost felt like I had to be touchy Wally, I physically craved touching him like an addict with drugs. I know know cuddling reduces happy chemicals in brain and blah blah blah but they didn’t say that it would make you want to touch your partner constantly. “Wally we literally just got done having sex.” I caught his hand as he tried sneaking it to my pussy probably to run my clit through the mess he had made.

“I’m sorry baby, fuck I just love touching you. And kissing you. And tasting you.” I smiled and rolled so I was laying on him and kissed his jaw.

“I love you touching me too, I love your cock stretching me out and filling me up, you always feel so good in me.” He made a humming sound before pulling the blanket over both of us. “Oh my goodness did we actually wear you out this time?” He swatted my back.

“Shh it’s already 9 at night and like you said you have school tomorrow. And yes I am exhausted, I know it’s shocking.” I smiled up at him and saw indeed he did look exhausted. “Get some sleep Mo, I’ll wake you in the morning”

#wally clark #school spirits #rhonda #maddie nears #fanfic

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dirtbag-linecook-kyloren · 1 year

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also i have adhd so every time somone interacts I get dopamine related to this fic and that’s definitely helped writing

have a tidbit I just wrote because I’m having a weird brain day so it’s Sad Girl Writing (it’s just a chemical imbalance everything is fine I’m honestly getting a lot done for being what I call a numb brain day)

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His clock ticks on the wall as the rising sun imprints the shadow of his blinds on the far wall. From bed, Hux can pretend he’s stuck in a world out of time, that seconds falling away are just beats on a metronome, not the passage of his finite life on Earth but just rests in a song he’ll start playing when his part begins. Fingers twitch phantom notes, a combination of concertos he played, when he still had the time. There’s a keyboard sitting in the corner of his room, dust coating the plastic. It never had the right feel, so Hux stopped playing it. Hux took the day off to focus on his school work, gave his shift to Finn, but his alarm goes off anyway, phone ringing in the room. He’s been up for a few hours, laying just like this and staring into the middle distance. It feels like he should get out of bed, feels like he should climb into the shower and start his day, but his limbs are heavy and his mattress magnetic. How easy it would be, Hux knows, to hide under his blankets from the light of the day. He could curl into his sheets and disappear from the world, leave his phone across the room and let hours pass in a haze, only the beating of his heart and the breathing of his lungs to prove he’s even alive. How nice, he thinks, to just stay in place, pretend he is a statue and wonder if he’d be art, or simply decor. Still, he needs to silence his alarm, so he claws his way from the comforter and stands, trudges the few feet to his dresser and unlocks his phone. Since he’s already standing, Hux makes his way to the bathroom, eases the weight in his bladder and splashes water over his face. It’s not a full clean, but it pulls him out of this feeling a little bit, allows him to make his way down the kitchen and pull granola from his cabinets, pouring himself a bowl to eat dry because finding milk is too much effort. Ben bought him this, he knows. It’s an idle thought, something he sits with as he shovels toasted oats and almonds through his lips and chews. Everything tastes like dirt, but Hux knows that’s his mood, and not the food, so he keeps eating, lets himself get lost in the repetitive motion. Idly, Hux wonders how Ben is. Is he yelling at someone? Is he fine? Is the restaurant busy, or is today just a slow and lazy Wednesday morning? Out of the corner of his eye, the light for his answering machine blinks, reminding him that one saved message is in the cordless phone’s small data bank. It’s a relic, something Ben had made fun of his for bothering to have, but Hux is grateful for it, even now, even as it serves only to haunt him. Selfish, Ben had called him. Heartless. Too busy trying to leave the restaurant behind to think about all the things it had done for him. Hux doesn’t want to leave. He’s been dreading his last day, dreading saying goodbye to all his friends. But if his presence is killing Ben that much, Hux will go. In a trance, Hux sets his bowl down, going over to the answering machine and hitting play. The saved message is the only thing left to play, so Ben’s voice fills the room. “I hope your happy,” Ben’s voice slurs, just like it had the first time he’d heard it. There’s a rage in it, one Hux hasn’t heard in months. It feels ironic, for them to be back right where they started. He took the long way around, just to end up standing in the same place, nothing gained and everything lost. “All this fucking time you spent with me, and you couldn’t do one stupid thing for me. Couldn’t meet my fucking parents. I just wanted them to be happy for me, you selfish, heartless asshole. Do you know how hard it is, to see your face every day? How much it hurts to try and act like I don’t fucking know you? Like you’re just a stranger? Fuck, I can’t fucking believe you, you piece of shit, I hope you-“ And the voice mail cuts off, and it’s a moment before Hux realizes he’s crying. Tears run from his eyes to his cheek, dripping onto his thighs as he sits on the floor in front of the answering machine. He has a week left of torturing Ben, of torturing himself, and then they’ll both be free. Hux will be worse for the loss, but it’s a feeling he’s growing used to. So is the heaviness in his heart as his quiet crying turns to violent, wracking sobs.

(I had to cut out a spoiler but it was like a sentence don’t worry)

((I love making hux sad bc I get to use my own internal dialogue it’s a mess up there))

#hands off hands out #kylux au

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ratcandy · 2 years

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oooh so i am curious thogh are there any fanon interpretations of snatcher/conductor/grooves you do like? i also feel like fanon is kind of unappealing for a lot of characters too so that is why i’m asking

Though I haven't finished all of it I do love @/banyana's Beingverse characterizations of Snatcher, that is all very delicious to me and gets the brain chemicals to produce the Happy ones

As for Conductor and Grooves, uhhhmmnmhhhmuuhhhhhhh . Nothing specific is coming to mind I read a whole bunch of fics featuring the two of them a long while back, and some'a those were pretty good! There are points though that it just feels like whole separate characters are made, which I see little issue with given canon being lackluster as it is shkdjgh. Unfortunately I can't remember which fics were which :( To be completely honest though I am usually partial towards characterizations that lean towards canon, albeit "fixing" what GFB screwed up massively with the ending Hard to find that tho as most people reasonably don't want to touch canon shdkgJHKJH So in my own writing I will still make Conductor an angry pissbaby of a selfish old man even if I do MUCH prefer the Beta Conductor characterization (wherein he's more of an actual grandpa), but if I have to redeem him this bad boy's getting complexity and also will not be redeemed at the drop of a hat. Some sincerity and genuine remorse for his actions would be sick Basically I like characterizations that acknowledge the faults of canon but work with them as opposed to against them - but also doing so fucking Sucks in scenarios such as Grooves Winning and the contradictory mess that is whatever the game's message is supposed to be . so it's. I am just sitting here basically sdhgkLJH

I want it all to be fucked up but I want it to be fucked up and purposeful if that makes sense

also timepiece corruption real because otherwise how in the got damn do you actually excuse (repeated) attempted child murder for selfish and stupid purposes such as a movie award

#ask #hattytime #bear with me if any of this Doesn't make sense because it's 12:30am rn #thanks to canon being a Mess what I want from fanon is also a Mess #because I've already recharacterized and messed with everybody in my head . where I build off canon #so my version of the Guys is different from the next person's version of the Guys. and we're all here because we're all in denial #so what do. i dunno

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dantevhell · 2 years

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what are your top 5 insane amphibia episodes :o

Oooh thats a though question bc I never thought abt it. But well let's go!

Warning: this will be a big ass answer sor- SIKE I HAVE NO REGRETS!!

5 - BATTLE OF THE BANDS - ok it was a simple somewhat fluff somewhat angsty amphibia ep a really calm b4 the storm kinda of thing but made it was well made! Observing sasha's more profund mentality of "I need control, they won't want me if I am not in control, they won't need me if I am not in control" towards her girls and realizing that deep down all that she wants is for her girls to be happy, for them to succeed, God that was heartwarming. Toadie was the perfect and most unexpected character to teach her that but hey it was welcome!

This two pictures here made me insane.

JUST LOOK HOW LOVEY DOVEY SASHA IS LOOKING AT MARCANNE I WILL COMBUST AND-

4 - BARREL'S WARHAMMER - I remember being genuinely SICK genuinely CRAZY genuinely DEPRESSED after this ep bc I never related to sasha so hard b4 and my kin on her only intensified on this ep! Seeing and confirming that sasha was insecure abt being left out of marcanne's life and feeling like she needs to have control for them to want her oh boy that was delicious and what a ep to make the fandom crazy with metas!! Seeing sasha beggining to realize that her actions were what was leading for the others to abandon her and she's the only to blame for her decisions.... only for her to fall into that trap of self destructive behavior MAN that sure was something that changed my brain chemicals HELL YEAH!!

3 - THE THIRD TEMPLE - I was really excited for that ep bc we would not only get the girls SOOO waited reunion in amphibia after 2 YEARS but also we would gain a flashback when their first meet so i remember I spend the entire week only thinking about it! I really wanted to see how their dynamic would work as a trio and I was really excited to see if my predictions were correct (they were!). The tension of sasha and anne unresolved conflict and their long waited 2nd reunion, marcy finally encountering sasha after months without seeing each other, sasha and anne being unaware of marcy's plans with the king, MAN, THE TENSION WAS PALPABLE!

Also seeing sasha showing regret over her past actions with anne but unable to stop her already on motion plans was sure a good angst hoooho boy!

2 - ALL IN - it was way more that I expected it to be! Anne's speech about her how she didnt loved herself, her fight with andrias and sasha's fight with darcy, andrias reading leif's letter, andrias and marcy flashback, marcy escaping her dreamscape!!! WOOF THAT WAS A ROLLERCOASTER OF EMOTIONS REAAAALLY WELL ELABORATED!

I think if the story ended there and we didn't had that stupid "suddenly the moon is the enemy bc the prophecy is too literal" plot and we just skipped to them saying goodbye and having the timeskip I would have been happier but that's content for aaaaanother post.....

1 - TRUE COLORS - hands down the amphibia ep that made me the most INSANE AND MENTALLY ILL. Nothing will top true colors for me bc I spent months making theories with my friends only for it to be almost all throw away and the plot twists blow my mind! I genuinely didn't see marcy's reveal coming or her agreement with the king being going to other worlds so jesus! What a time! Marcy's speech was really impactful, andrias revealing his "true colors" was satisfactory in a way that was really anger inducing, sasha fight with anne and the begging of her redemption arc was soooo cool to watch and the animation in Anne's calamity form !! Wooooo I genuinely didn't know how to react after this ep I was feeling anesthetized a good few days!

#almost all of those revolve around sashas redemption arc hah i guess yall will never guess whos my fav of the trio #ANYWAYS HERE IT IS ENJOY IT!!!#thanks for the ask it was sooooo fun to think abt it!!! mwaaah #love sharing my insane brainworms and love for amphibia !#amphibia #dante speaks

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