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#unapologetically intimate
serpulalacrymans · 2 months
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yet another song that made me think about you
Ooh.. This one's really nice. Thank you for sharing. I like whatever genre this is a lot. It feels crispy, if that makes any sense? I, um.. It's also.. Kind of.. Helpful in a way. I guess. Educational somehow.
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healpimp · 5 months
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If you are ever in doubt wether my posts with demo and soldier interacting are boots n bombs or not i promise you it is intended to be fully and utterly homosexual
#They might not always be balls-slapping-the-taint deep in each other when i draw them#but i assure you its boots n bombs#i draw them like how masashi kishimoto draws naruto and sasuke#never not thinking abt the other when drawing them#like do i have to draw them cumming in every hole before you are convinced its gay. look at them barbara.#do you think its galpal time when i use the half-zatoichi as the sword that kills soldier.#do u think i chose the katna cus i thought it was the coolest sword. or my fav sword to use.#no. im a bottle bitch.#you think i use THE gayest sword in tf2. the one that can oneshot 2 specific classes if they also carry the sword.#just so you can assume its a best friend thing.#i use the half-zatoichi bc that shit is gayer than gay sex#like wydm they can kill each other in one shot. homosexual behavior.#theyve killed each other so many times now that they have intimate knowledge of each others bodies#they know what to aim for to kill them. how to ngle the sword just so.#cross faction icons.#the blood and gore and violence is a hyper masculine way of them baring themselves to each other without having to commit#the danger and pain and betrayal that awaits when theyre openly and unapologetically friendly and close w each other#the fact when they WERE open abt it they were punished#they had to choose between their job and their friend and without the staged betrayal#without the lies fed to them they would have chosen friend#and you know the job is important to both of them#enjoyable even#bnb CAN be loveydovey picnic at the park#but its not all it is#its the war where they tear each other apart thinking the other is in the wrong#its their fear of committing again#its their festering image of what the other did and the inability to even attempt to clear it up till its too late#and its the way they can bounce back from it#because theyre gay barbara theyre homosexual
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spaceratprodigy · 4 months
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one of my favorite things abt how faith reacts to max in fallbrook arc is her being directly faced with her own hypocrisy
#I am a faith apologist but also she's whack fr#like girl you haven't been honest about yourself or your past either 💅#she's very evasive when she's the topic of conversation#not that she outright lies but she avoids questions or answers as vaguely as possible#just because she kinda learned early in Edgewater the consequences of her trying to be truthful about her life#and how unglamorously people react#figured adopting the mysterious persona and isolating herself was her only option#because phineas was the only person she could talk to the only person who understood to some extent what she was going through#and to add to it..#her own history with violence and anger#and even tho she became a very numb quiet distant persom because of her own past#halcyon got it's hands on her and cut her deeply and awakened a certain fire in her for better or for worse#excluding how often she has to defend herself for a variety of reasons and how it makes her feel..#punching nelson (twice) + shooting hortense between the eyes + shooting tilda in the knee..#girl you're not exactly a great role model at having control over your violent tendencies either 💅#but there's something so raw abt her and max just.. knowing those feelings intimately.. and not wanting it for the other..#defending each other.. seeing the good in each other.. /knowing/ the good in each other..#understanding how messy and complicated they are and then understanding why and just ough bringing out the best in each other#reaching a point where they can breathe and heal and not be in such a spiraling pain anymore they can just be loved and be themselves#unapologetically. caged no longer. being harmed no longer. by others or by themselves. and taking it out on others no longer#anyway#what I'm saying is..#the call is coming from inside the house..#yes he had an entire revenge scheme and lied abt his intentions.. but like.. he's also holding a mirror up to her face#SORRY I just love thinking abt how complicated cap faith is lmao she's a very broken soul who is trying her best in an unfortunate situatio#the way she handles her own traumas and griefs just isn't pretty and that's a whole other can of worms she's constantly faced with#rambling#faith and max
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onewomancitadel · 3 months
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I also of course love in stories when you are presented with only two competing options, and neither are attractive solutions, and/or the conflict is in a stalemate because of it, but then the relief is that a third option is possible. The 'knot' is unravelled. Even better when the third option is a synthesis of those two ideas, which kind of retroactively transforms them too.
I also think this is a good way of looking at the mechanics of storytelling in general (e.g. with competing character motives, or things required to get you to the endgame). But I am always a fan of it because I love characters in impossible situations with solutions nobody could see yet, especially in fandom at a speculative level.
In the example of Adam and Eva, paradoxically what they were both doing was necessary, and it's only through both preservation and total annihilation that one nanosecond of transformation bleeds open.
More specifically, I was crying when Jonas had that one moment of hope. It was all that was needed.
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oldtestleper · 2 years
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Barry hbo literally makes me. bite snarl bark etcetera. insane fucking insane. this tv show is an essay this tv show is 10 essays. yes I’m very stoned right now and yes i truly believe this is a stupid good tv show
#i think what it explores abt violence & abuse & forgiveness & redemption is really intelligent and nuanced and coherent? i don’t know I#think I want to study bill hader under a microscope that is for SURE. i want to have him write responses of 150 words or more to at least 20#detailed questions about his opinions on things. in terms of his influences and sources and references and ideas and so forth I mean#i don’t know. people are like ‘wow that is not normal Barry is insaneeee’ but having been close witness to several cases of gaslighting and#emotional abuse. it was weird that he was saying it in such a forthright and unapologetic manner but what he was describing—the envi#envi​ronmental changes. the harming/killing of pets w a certain amt of plausible deniability; the goal of isolation and mistrust of other -#people; the erosion of the sense of self esteem; the sensation of one’s brain ‘eating itself’— are all overt & specific gaslighting tech -#techniques. the joke is that he doesn’t ‘know’ it as emotional abuse; he understands it as a#particular ‘technique’ of his job. hader is equivocating the violence of IPV to the violence of the military/people ‘following orders’/#‘killing bad guys’. all these forms of violence are in effect the same violence; & in that regard the rules of choice; self-determination;#guilt; forgiveness; and repentance apply.#it’s not a terrifically original idea* but I think the ways it /presents/ these ideas and deconstructs and explores them is really smart &#*that military/state/‘justified’ violence is allegorically/symbolically/materially related to interpersonal/(esp. qua)intimate-partner#- violence. anyway. like it’s been said before#in terms of being a rhetorical tool.#but like I said I think the value is in the nuance and critical consideration of the perspective. and the clarity of the message also#idk like I said. essays. also like I said I am quite high so. perhaps most of this is nonsense. however I’ve learned not to discount my#stoney writing too much. it got me thru last semester and ultimately also thru this one#antwayyyyy that’s enough of my thots. maybe I’ll make a real post later. I’m still having computer trouble so idk might be too hard :///#.txt#we’ll see.#barry hbo#I’m trying to keep myself entertained and my research muscles engaged so my brain doesn’t j fallow lol.
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griffworks · 8 months
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Woao thars a lot of tags
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allisonlol · 5 months
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Bsd characters with a s/o who does only fans?
a/n: omg hello?? i’m BACK. thank y’all for all the love in my absence btw…we hit 3k awhile ago and i didn’t say anything so TYSM❗️🫶🏻 here are some little hc’s to get me back into the swing of things. i chose a bunch of randoms!
warnings: mild sexual content, implied violence
BSD Characters When You Have an Onlyfans
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Dazai:
first and foremost lol
he is DEFINITELY down for this shit
you need him to take photos for you? he already has the camera open on his phone. you wanna record something with him? you blink and his clothes will already be on the FLOOR
i feel like dazai already has a thing for recording sex, so he loves it
i’m sensing a bit of voyuerism with the way he wants other people to watch y’all 🤨
also doxxes and hunts down the people who leak ur shit 🫵🏻❌
Chuuya
hmm mixed opinions on this one
like. chuuya doesn’t wanna control u or tell u what to do, but…
he is too possessive a man to be alright with u having an onlyfans
is embarrassed to admit this tho and will just be like “oh…okay” while avoiding looking you in the eye if u ever mention it
completely avoids getting involved with it…sorry but you’ll have to take ur own pictures.
don’t get me wrong, he likes to see them after and always think u look incredible!! chuuya just hates to imagine all the other men doing the same and worse to them
bro will hustle even more to provide enough money for you to get off the net 💀
Akutagawa
u had to tell him what onlyfans was and even then, he was like “erm…”
i feel like he doesn’t take it too seriously. at first almost considers it like instagram 😭
but once u ask him to help take pics for you, and he sees what ur (not) wearing, he’s suddenly like “what’s all this abt…”
let’s you continue to post but only if he can stand in the background of each picture with a knife 🔪
besides that, he doesn’t like being on camera for videos or anything. doesn’t feel comfy with u filming what he considers ur most intimate moments 👎🏻
Nikolai
don’t have to ask him twice!! this man is even more eager than dazai
becomes his goal to get you to the top 1% (and y’all get pretty damn close)
your photos and videos turn much kinkier once nikolai joins you
gets u new lingerie to wear for each photo set, buys u a bunch of toys, proposes new ideas for videos…might as well give this man 50% of profits
almost starts to take over YOUR onlyfans…makes an appearance in every post 💀
Fyodor
i’m unapologetic about this one
it’s an immediate and definite no
demands u delete the account and “respect yourself more” 🤨🤨
(covering up for his extreme possessiveness…he cannot stand any “vile men” looking at u)
u try to show him the photos on there and he shoves your phone away, talking some shit abt how it’s disgusting??
i feel like fyodor has one of those weird madonna-whore complexes…whole other thing to get into but basically he doesn’t even like to see sexual photos of u most of the time 💀
ur messing with his religious vibe!! don’t tempt him!!
taglist: @deadmitochondria @miycutie @chuuyasboots @shy-socially-awkward-intovert @beandaifuku @stygianoir @sonder-paradise @irethepotato @serenareiss @ashthemadwriter @mrsdostoevsky @creamygojo @disa-ster
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saetoru · 7 months
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sometimes it’s easy to miss satoru’s pure, unbridled excitement he has from anything affectionate you give him. sometimes it’s easy to be blinded by the smug comment or two—give him a kiss for no reason and he’s like “just can’t keep your hands off of me, huh?” or tell him you love him out of the blue and he’s like “aw, you’re obsessed, aren’t you?” or bring him something sweet on your way home and he’s all “always thinking of me, aren’t you? i am unforgettable.”
but he’s so, so excited, it’s almost palpable. almost tangible. you can almost feel it. you can practically touch it. you kiss him and he’s eyeing your lips hopefully for one more. give him one more. he wants one more so bad, he’ll even lean closer and tap his cheek to make the distance shorter for you, just so it’s easier. you tell him you love him and he’s teasing you that he definitely loves you most just so you can say no, i love you more than most. just because he wants to hear it again. he needs to hear it just one more time so he can make sure it’s true. you hand him kikufuku you got on the way home and he’s playfully demanding you hand feed him. he just likes the way your thumb is gentle as you wipe the cream from the corner of his lips. it’s tender, and a little more intimate than he cares to admit. more than he thought possible from something so seemingly normal.
it’s excitement, in a raw, endearing sort of way. he’s happy to be loved, so purely ecstatic you do it for no reason at all sometimes. sometimes it’s a kiss because he’s just so cute when he yawns. sometimes it’s a whisper of i love you, toru because it’s been silent for a bit and you wanted to fill it with something. sometimes it’s a slice of cake from his favorite bakery because he seems to be having a bad week. it’s never because he earned it. never because he had to work for it. never because he’s strong and capable and responsible and does what he’s expected to do. it’s just because he exists—because he’s there and you love him for being there and that’s all there is to it.
he always responds the only way he knows how—teasing you in that way only satoru can manage. but you love him unapologetically in that way only you can manage, and that’s why you know to give him more. to kiss him that extra time. to say i love you again so he can make sure. to touch him gently just so he can feel fragile for once. it makes him excited to be loved—it’s the best part about it.
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lizzieisright · 24 days
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I’m so not normal about how you write alpha!abby I need more😩
Palestine: what can you do
Thank you for your req, I've missed writing alpha!abby it was so fun!(although this one is sappy)
Fri(end)s
alpha!abby x omega!reader
Tags: dead dove: do not eat. a/b/o universe (female alphas have dicks), modern AU, hurt/comfort, "alphas and omegas can be friends!!" delusion, they really stretch the definition of friendship. No full smut but they get horny.
Inspired by "Friends" by V.
-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-
People say there's no such thing as a friendship between an alpha and an omega. You disagree. 
People just need to embrace the inherent lust that comes with being friends with your opposite and you can be great friends. Instead of fearing to make everything awkward when you both smell your attraction, you should acknowledge it and laugh about it. Be each other's ego boosters. It's not that hard. 
For example, you and Abby - you've been friends for years. It did start with Abby hitting on you, but she backed off immediately when you explained that you're not interested. Anyway, Abby stayed and asked to be your friend, and you agreed - Abby was cool and smart. It later became a running joke between the two of you where Abby'd jokingly hit on you just to get on your nerves or make you smile. 
That's pretty much how you overcame the awkward barrier: you started being honest with each other about everything. You formed a bond so intimate between the two of you that people often mistook you for a couple. You didn't mind. It wouldn't happen anyway, since Abby was a player. 
You had no idea how many omegas Abby's fucked in her lifetime, but you rarely saw the same omega twice. Abby kinda had a reputation around campus. She was aware of it, but what could she do? It wasn’t her fault her dick was good. And listen, Abby wasn’t an asshole, no one could catch her disrespecting omegas or talking who and how and when she fucked. People just knew. Well, it was hard not to know when her partners reeked of her after, but the point stood - Abby was a lady, not a prick when it came to privacy.
She fucked omegas that no one would believe to even have such dirty thoughts/time to fuck around/ability to feel sexual attraction or whatever reason insecure incel alphas kept telling themselves - and Abby always stayed discrete if omegas asked her too. Because that was how you got pussy, you fucking morons, not by insulting and being entitled. 
So Abby didn’t care that she had a reputation - she only cared if her partners felt safe and enjoyed themselves, and as long as it stayed this way, Abby was happy. 
And you knew all of this, because you were her best friend. She told you all of it during one night when you were drinking wine and you asked her about how she felt about her reputation. 
Then Abby asked about your deal, and you honestly told her that you didn't know: you loved the touch and flirting but you felt like you didn't have space for relationships. That you haven't met anyone yet who'd make you want to make an effort - of course Abby joked about her being the one and you laughed. 
“Well, if I ever need help, I'll come to you.” You winked and Abby laughed as well. 
It was easy between the two of you to what some would say, an alarming point where the boundaries of friendship became blurry. 
It wasn't a rare occurrence when you'd be at a party, pleasantly drunk, and then after what felt like an hour of dancing, you'd find Abby, sitting somewhere and sipping her whiskey, looking unapologetically hot in her muscle tee and jeans, and you'd get onto her lap, hugging her neck while she'd support your weight by grabbing your thigh. Her scent would get stronger and you'd smile into her shoulder, teasing her. Sometimes, of course, you'd find Abby with another omega already, her hands exploring and grabbing her partner, and you'd grin and go do something else. You always expect yourself to be upset, but strangely, you never are - Abby is your friend and you're happy she is getting some. 
Tonight is a little different. You're sleepy and horny and overall, want to feel someone's warmth and touch. So you find Abby and straddle her. She doesn't even lift a brow, just holds you by your waist and keeps you safe. Abby smells your arousal and chuckles, but you stick your tongue out.
“I fucking hate being an omega.” You say and start playing with Abby's hair while she is caressing your back. It's soft and cosy despite you being all horny. It's not flirty, it's not subtle: you two just love being close, and Abby radiates her presence, making everyone look away in fear of challenging her. Abby locks her arms behind your back and you arch into her.
“Yeah?” 
“Yeah. Wanna fuck so bad.”
Abby laughs and looks at you with her red eyes: she can't control it when she is drunk and has you on her lap. Abby smells your scent and smirks, her canines growing longer, her presence getting stronger, scaring other alphas away.
“Well, you know I'm always available for you.” You smack her on her shoulder and Abby laughs. 
“Don't fucking tease me, bitch.” 
“We can make out if it'd make you feel better.” Abby shrugs. You think for a second.
“Yeah. Let's make out. I bet you're a good kisser.”
“Five stars reviews, baby.”
You laugh, but Abby is already cupping your cheek and guiding you down to her level so she can kiss you. You go pliant when her warm lips touch yours: Abby is a good kisser. She is slow and gentle, but you feel the power and control behind her movements. She is holding you with one arm on your waist while she is grabbing your neck with the other one, her thumb stroking your jaw. 
It doesn't feel like you two are toeing on some kind of line you're not allowed to cross: it feels natural and normal, like you've done it a million times before. Maybe you feel this way because Abby is confident and knows what she is doing, but she also doesn't push you further. You're just lazily making out, her warm tongue is on top of yours, exploring your mouth. It feels good.
You feel Abby getting harder under you and you grind against her crotch just to be a little shit, and she stops kissing you. 
“And I'm a tease?”
“I love seeing you suffer.” You grin and Abby kisses you again, holding your hips down so you won't be able to grind anymore.
It's affirming, it's an ego boost: you love seeing Abby, hot and amazing alpha, being so weak around you. Abby loves knowing she is the only one who you allow to touch you - loves smelling how horny she can get you. So you keep making out and talking for the rest of the night, existing in your own little bubble. It’s beautiful. 
After, Abby takes you home and you cuddle in her bed before you fall asleep, Abby's strong arm pulling you close, her hair making a cloud of her scent around you, keeping you safe and protected. 
In the morning you wake up with her hard cock pressing into your thigh and you sigh - you want to sleep more, not being humped by a sleeping alpha. Abby shifts and grinds against you in her sleep, and your cunt throbs: you've never been so close to an alpha who is aroused. New experience, but this is Abby, and you want to fucking sleep.
You just shake her shoulder and she grunts, unhappy. 
“Come on, Anderson, you have a morning wood.” You tell her, still sleepy. Abby shifts and turns on her back, taking you with her so your head is on her chest and if you could've been bothered and opened your eyes, you'd have seen the outline of her cock under the covers. 
But you go back to sleep. 
So this is how your friendship is: you're so close there's almost no boundaries between you. You're not afraid to smell horny around Abby and you feel good about yourself when you smell her being horny about you. You're never upset about her hookups and she doesn't growl at every alpha who looks your way. It's perfect.
The smell of love comes early into your friendship, and you both tease each other about it, “can't believe you love me it's so embarrassing”. Abby is your closest friend and you love her, and you two are proof of an alpha and an omega capable of being friends. 
You're comfortable with each other to the point where you complain about your cycles and how fucking horny and unsatisfied you both are during this time: usually it's you who complains because Abby fucks through her ruts. You always tease her about smelling like her lucky omega, but Abby just smirks, still rut high. She looks deliciously dangerous after her rut and the smell of attraction grows stronger between the two of you. Usually Abby’d invite you for a bottle of wine after her rut ends and your drunk makeouts would get more passionate too, since Abby wouldn't hesitate to grab and knead your ass, making you grind on her cock. This is the only time when you let awkwardness fill the room: Abby doesn't control herself and you have to stop her before it goes too far. 
(This is the only time when your heart flutters and your hopes rise. This is the only time that threatens to ruin your perfect friendship. 
You know if you sleep with Abby, you'll never be friends again. You'll get territorial about her, and Abby doesn't need it - it's a question of incompatibility between the two of you. 
So you stop her.) 
But the universe doesn't like anything that is perfect - it's against her nature. The balance is in imbalance, and it tries to restore itself. 
For the last few months your heats have been getting worse - you’re stressed, you can’t sleep and you feel like shit. Your mood swings start to get worse as well - if before you’d just get a little sad and then fall down into the horny fog of a heat, now your mood stays longer in the sad space. It’s tiring.
And this heat hits you very hard. You're not horny, you're in pain and sad and it's hard to maintain your mind. You wish you were just horny - you could just bury your nose in Abby's hoodie that she always lends you before your heat and you'd keep fucking yourself until the heat wave would pass. 
You do bury your nose in Abby's hoodie, but it makes you cry even more. You feel so alone and so useless, like no one truly needs you and you'll never find your happiness, like you're bound to die alone. It's terrifying and makes you sob, and you can't be bothered to be horny because what's the point of it if you will be alone all your life? 
Abby:
u ok?
You scramble to your phone and cry harder: Abby cares. Abby knows about your last struggles with your heats and she checks on you.  You're not alone. 
So you call her.
“Doll, I'm not doing phone sex-” Abby says jokingly, but then she hears you sob loudly. “What happened?” Abby's voice shakes. “Where are you? Fuck, talk to me-”
You take a big breath before Abby'd worry herself into an early grave. 
“I'm fine. I'm home.” You sniff. “I just- It's so bad, Abby.”
“Are you hurt?” Abby is still worried. 
“No. It's a mood swing.” You cry again, feeling so broken. “I feel so fucking alone. And you texted me and I- sorry, fuck.” You wipe your tears and hug her hoodie, pressing the phone closer to your ear. You feel ridiculous - you know it’s your hormones talking.
“Hey, I'm here.” Abby says, trying to soothe you, but you cry harder.
“What if I end up alone? What if I never meet my person? I spend all those fucking heats alone and it's so hard, and I can't think of doing it for the rest of my life all by myself.” You fall into another fit of sobs. Abby is silent for a moment.
“I'm coming over.” Abby says, dead serious, and you suddenly sober up. 
“I'm in heat, Abby, you can't come over!” You sit on your bed, worried.
“I don't fucking care! You're hurting and you're alone, I can't let this happen.” You hear Abby rustle around. “Can you do something for me while I'm on my way?”
“I can try.” You say without any hope.
“Go drink some water and take a shower. And send me some pics so I know you did it, okay?”
“I'm so not sending nudes, Abby.” You chuckle without any bite. Abby huffs. 
“Go drink your water.” Abby ends the call and you stare at your phone for a second. 
You try to keep yourself together - you send Abby pictures of an empty glass and a hem of a towel when you're done, but it takes five minutes before your mood swings again. You shake and try to breathe through another spiral into hell, but it's so fucking hard. You get to the point where you start rocking back and forth like an anxious child, trying to self-soothe. You feel like you're in some kind of trance until you hear your doorbell. 
You fly to the door before your dam would break: you open the door to Abby who's panting loudly - she probably ran up the stairs. 
It takes a second for both of you to comprehend the situation before Abby throws everything on the floor and scoops you in her arms, and you break, sobbing into her chest and clinging to her shoulders. Abby's scent soothes you, protectiveness radiating from her while she holds you tight and kisses your head. 
“I'm here.” She murmurs and you cling to her harder. “I'm not going anywhere. I'll keep you safe.”
It takes five minutes of breathing Abby's scent for your hormones to calm down. You sniff before moving away, but Abby doesn't let you, still holding you. 
“How are you feeling?”
“Better.” You say honestly and Abby lets you go. 
Her eyes are red and she tries not to breathe too much, and you feel ashamed - she got here to comfort you but you stink of heat. Of course Abby reacts to it, she can’t help it, and now she will be stuck between taking care of you and taking care of you. It’s unfair to her. 
“I will take scent blockers.” You turn to go to the kitchen, but Abby stops you, gently holding your bicep. 
“No. It's not the heat. It's the hurt.” You wince: you know it's hard for alphas to smell hurt on omegas. “And I have pretty good self-control.” 
You chuckle and let Abby take her shoes off. She is in joggers and her favourite hoodie, looking cosy and comfortable. You want to cuddle her, and this is exactly what Abby does. She makes you drink another glass of water, feeds you a banana and takes you to your bed. 
Abby stops when she sees her hoodie on your bed like she didn't expect you to actually use it. (Like she totally doesn't use your hoodie when she is too sad to find a rut buddy). But Abby doesn't say anything and just tugs you to the bed, enveloping you in her arms and her scent. It's warm and beautiful and you bury your nose in her skin. 
You don't talk. Abby caresses you and kisses you head from time to time while you get upset again. 
“I fucking hate being an omega.” You sniff. Abby presses you closer, her scent gets stronger, reacting to your distress. “There's something wrong with me, I swear.”
“You're perfect.” Abby murmurs and you blink your tears away. 
“It's so hard, Abby. It's unbearable. With every heat I get more worn out and upset.” You cry quietly. “I will go on suppressants, I don't want to suffer like this anymore.”
Abby swallows. Suppressants are no joke, they ruin people’s health - that’s why they’re taken in emergencies. For everything else there’s scent blockers that don’t disturb cycles and don’t put people in danger. 
“We will figure it out. We will get you back into normal horny heats and you’ll complain about it to me, I promise.” 
It soothes you and you fall asleep, your scent slowly changing to your usual love scent, the one that Abby loves the most. 
Abby knows that sometimes omegas go through their cycle with a lot more pain than normal, but seeing you, the fucking light of her life, suffer like this is torture. She’d honestly prefer to hold herself back from fucking you because you’re in heat, and not wipe your tears while you tell her how scared you’re of ending up alone. 
Abby watches your calm face and caresses your cheek. If you only knew.
“I’ll always be here.” Abby murmurs, knowing you won’t hear her. “I’m yours.” She kisses your forehead.
When Abby moves away she is met with your wide eyes. 
Her heart stops. You’re silent, lost for words, but something starts happening: your scent gets stronger and Abby can see golden sparks as your eyes start to change colour. 
“Fuck.” You sigh. Your chest gets tighter and your cunt starts pulsing with need. “Ab-”
Abby kisses you roughly, pressing your head into the pillow and she shoves her tongue into your mouth, her hands gripping your waist, and now you’re lost in her scent and touch, arching and whimpering into her mouth. It feels amazing, you’re soaking your pants while you cling to Abby and relax under her, submitting to your alpha.  You’ve never felt so good during your heat and you want more. You buck your hips into Abby and she grinds her cock on your pussy, making you shudder and moan. The kiss gets messier, there’s a lot of spit on your chins, but you don’t care - you want Abby closer, you want her in you, stretching you on her cock, knotting you. 
“Abby-” You moan into her mouth and Abby growls. “Fuck me, please.” 
Abby growls louder and licks your neck, her canines brushing against your skin and you whine, desperate. But then Abby stops kissing you neck, stops moving and her grip on you eases. 
“Fuck.” Abby sighs into your neck. She smells how worked up and desperate you are, and she has to fight herself to not fuck you right now. “You’ll regret it. I’m not going to hurt you like this.” Abby rasps and your heart breaks. 
You feel rejected and the smell of hurt fills Abby’s nose. She looks at you and her heart breaks from seeing you cry, knowing she did this. You can’t just reject an omega during their heat - it messes them up and then they won’t be able to keep you in their lives after, too hurt and ashamed. 
“I want to, doll.” Abby tries to console you. “I really fucking want to, but I need you to be sober before we do anything. Look at me.” You obey and Abby kisses your tears. “I promise you, if you agree to this when this wave subsides, I’ll do whatever you need me to. For now we can keep kissing.”
It makes you feel better and you nod, tugging Abby down to kiss her again. You still are very horny and Abby has to pin your hips so you won’t grind against her, but you want to cum and you keep squirming under her while Abby tries to slow down the pace of your kiss. She is so gentle and careful, and eventually you melt and relax, the heat wave going away. It takes a solid twenty minutes of kissing and Abby holding you down before your head gets clearer. You break the kiss and sigh, relieved you’ve finally got a break. Abby looks like she has everything under control and she totally didn’t have to fight you and herself so you wouldn’t make a mistake. Her scent though tells you how much she has to restrain herself - it’s thick and heavy, aggressive, domineering. Abby didn’t lie when she said she wants to fuck you as much you want her to fuck you, and it makes you hormone-crazy heart feel better.
 “You weren’t lying when you said you have amazing self-control.” You murmur and brush Abby’s hair out of her face. Abby chuckles. 
“Are you feeling better?”
“I’m not all sex crazy right now, if this is what you are asking.”  You keep caressing Abby’s hair. She blinks a few times, but the red doesn’t leave her eyes. “Thank you for handling this so well.”
Abby smiles and kisses your cheek. The question hangs in the air.
“I’m-” You take a deep breath full of Abby’s pheromones and it messes with your head, but you try to find the right words. You don’t want Abby to feel rejected too. “I’m not ready to spend my heat with a partner.” I won’t be able to let you go if we do this. 
Abby does smell of regret, but she smiles at you. 
“Of course. But call me if you get upset again. I don’t want you to be alone.”
You nod and walk Abby out, kissing her goodbye. You lock the door after her and sigh, knowing what is ahead. 
You spend three days fucking yourself to a memory of Abby saying I’m yours. 
Only after you’ve recovered and got back to yourself you’re hit with a realisation that Abby actually told you she is yours. You try to find a way to justify her words, to connect it with your friendship and how close you two are, but even your levels of almost no boundaries can’t create a good excuse.
You were not meant to hear her. She thought you were asleep. It was her secret. 
So Abby didn’t say it to make you feel better or trick you heat-brain into calming down - her scent and touch already did it. There was no reason for her to say it unless she fucking meant it. You don’t know what to do. You never thought Abby’d be interested in something like an actual relationship with you.
Your perfect friendship was built on two opposing facts: Abby is a player, and you’re fine being alone until you meet your person. And now you’re not fine being alone because deep down you know she is your person, and Abby said she is yours without wanting you to know. 
You feel like you’re going crazy. You’re terrified of any awkwardness that will inevitably come with this whole ordeal. You know you won’t be able to hide your uncomfortable, shaking discovery from Abby - she is your best friend after all, she will know something is up with you. 
You manage to act normal for a week without Abby getting suspicious - you two are still flirty, but now when Abby touches you, you feel like she sets you on fire with how your cheeks burn. Now there’s a hidden meaning behind her touch - the one you were not supposed to know.
The song on the radio makes you break. 
Abby is driving you two to the Korean restaurant she found and wanted to show you, and you two sit in comfortable silence - Abby is focused on the road and you stare out of the window, taking the view of this part of the city, when this song comes on the radio.
You're in my head / I had plans for the weekend / But wound up with you instead / Back here again  / Got me deep in my feelings / When I should be in your bed 
Your cheeks burn. It is a weekend and Abby spends time with you, taking you, her best friend, to the restaurant. Does she want to be in your bed?
You and I go back to like '09, it's like forever / And you were there my lonely nights, yeah / Keeping me together / So wouldn't it make sense if I was yours? / And you could call me your baby / But we say we're just, say we're just-
You breath hitches. This song is stripping you of any kind of pretence. Your smell changes and Abby looks at you for a second.
Friends, just for now / Yeah, but friends don't say words that / Make friends feel like more than just / Friends, just for now / Now, I'm over pretending / So let's put the "end" in friends
“You okay?”
“Yeah, just remembered something.” Abby hums and doesn’t ask you further.
Friends are not supposed to get too close / And feel emotions that / We're feeling now, now, now / We ain't slowing down, down, down / But once we cross the line / There's no denying you and / I can never turn around, 'round, 'round / Know we'll never be the same 
You take a shaking breath when you think back to your heat, begging Abby to fuck you. Yes, you will never be the same. But you have a choice to make.
“This song is about us.” You chuckle nervously. 
“Really? Sorry, I didn’t pay attention.” Abby laughs, but starts to pay attention now, while you wait for the traffic light to turn green.
You and I go back to like '09, it's like forever / And you were there my lonely nights, yeah / Keeping me together / So wouldn't it make sense if I was yours? / And you could call me your baby / But we say we're just, say we're just-
Friends, just for now / Yeah, but friends don't say words that / Make friends feel like more than just / Friends, just for now / Now, I'm over pretending / So let's put the "end" in friends
Abby clears her throat. She doesn’t joke or flirt - she understands. 
“Yeah. It is about us.”
Abby doesn’t say anything more, but her scent gets a little spicy - she is nervous as well. You also don’t say anything - she is driving, after all. Not the time for this conversation. It’s the first time in your friendship when there’s so much thick, nervous tension between you. 
Abby parks the car and you just sit for a moment, feeling like you need to talk about it right now. Abby clears her throat again.
“So do you want to put the "end" in friends?” Abby asks quietly, not knowing why did you bring it up - do you want to stop being friends or do you want to be something more?
You chuckle, endeared by Abby’s nervousness - she is always confident and calm, you’ve never seen her like this. 
“You told me you’re mine.” You start, fidgeting with your fingers. You’re scared to cross this line and change everything, but you want to. “It made me happy. And very fucking confused, because- You know what I mean.” You cringe - you’re not going to include Abby’s sex life in your confession. “Were you serious about it?”
Abby lost any filter right after she heard “it made me happy”, so she just bursts, spilling all her feelings for you.
“I’m in love with you. I wanna marry you and have a fucking picket fence and a dog and two and a half children with you.” Abby says while her scent becomes ten times stronger with love. “You’re the one for me.”
You blink your happy tears away and look at Abby’s face, full of love and devotion. 
“Maybe we should start with a date?”
Abby smiles and takes your face into her hands, kissing you with so much love you can swim in it.
“A date sounds good.”
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ozzgin · 2 months
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Hai, beloved....❤️✨
I've liked your blog for a long time and I came here to make a request With the six Handsome Yokai, muehehe ~
With fem reader who is the wife of the Yokai (separately) and is a woman who turns out to be a beautiful and elegant Oni please...❤️💋
Of course! My apologies for the delay, it always takes some time to get back into the mood for a certain story. This will be a yokai harem week hopefully. :D I'm very glad you're still around, Strawberry. 💕
Yandere! Yokai Harem AU: Oni! Reader
Featuring the six demon boyfriends - now husbands! - and a female oni reader.
Content: female reader, monster romance
[Main Story] [Character Guide] [Boyfriend Headcanons]
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Murasaki
Murasaki needs time to accustom himself to any change in the relationship. You've gotten so close that you now wear his wedding ring, but strangely enough, he will be somewhat distant and shy in the first month after marriage. Mind you, he married you specifically because he cannot envision his life without your presence in it. Yet every time he glances at you, his cheeks burn in embarrassment, and he quickly looks away with a huff. It feels different. You're as beautiful as always, except now you bear the title of his wife. It's an intimacy he's never experienced before, making him nervous. Murasaki does not like uncertainty. How do people get used to it? Additionally, he will be extra protective and particularly caustic towards potential threats. You've had to hold him back from slashing a mere passerby once. "What're you looking at a married woman for? The road is straight ahead, asshole!"
Kiritsubo
Kiritsubo has always been a clingy and affectionate partner and you didn't think it could get any worse. Then you got married. On one hand, it has certainly helped his struggle of feeling insecure and inadequate. Can you blame him? You're stunning, often catching the eye of demons and humans alike. It was difficult to imagine someone like you would be pleased to have him as a partner. Yet here you are by his side, wearing the ring he's given you to tie the knot. He couldn't be any happier. A newfound sense of pride has flooded his entire being. Perhaps he is meant to be yours, after all. On the other hand, he's glued to your side even more so than before. You're married, which means you're basically one, right? It means you can be even more intimate. "Oh, you're preparing a bath for us? I can't wait!"
Suma
"Beauty and the Beast" is a fitting comparison for your relationship with Suma, and not just appearance-wise. You're elegant and well-mannered, while the yokai man is, well...nonchalant is one way to describe it. He is loud, carefree, and unapologetically violent. He loves fighting almost as much as he loves you. In the eyes of most people, you're an unusual pair. Despite everything, Suma can be very gentle, especially when it comes to you. And if he does get too enthusiastic, you're thankfully not as frail as one would believe. You are a powerful oni, after all. He's the kind of guy that will shout "This is my wife" so the whole perimeter knows not to mess with you.
Yuugiri
Yuugiri might just be the perfect match for someone of your status. He is equally good-looking, with androgynous features and distinguished manners. A perfect, charming husband according to many. He knows exactly how to sweep you off your feet and loves to spoil you with compliments. The snake yokai is very proud to have you as his wife. The downside to this is that he can be extremely jealous. If he suspects someone is trying to flirt with you, know that he is already planning their demise. He'll flash you a confident smile while pondering ways to torment the bastard. Don't worry, he will be equally ruthless if someone tries to get close to him instead.
Sakaki
Ah, Sakaki. Your very own gloomy husband, plagued by doubt and fear. Once again, an intriguing pair to outsiders. The depressed, melancholic yokai and his gorgeous, bright oni wife. Yet this is the very reason the demon has fallen in love with you: you're the light in his darkness, the hope in his despair. He proposed to you in the way most expected of him: a ring in one hand, and a noose in the other. "It's you for eternity, or death. You may seal my fate." Life with him won't change much after tying the knot. Although he might get a little more confident now that you have made things official. "Excuse me, you're flirting with my tomb partner. We'll be sharing a coffin one day; you don't stand a chance."
Sekiya
Sekiya will take forever to propose to you, mostly out of fear. Despite your best attempts to reassure him of your love, he is still very much crippled by the fear of rejection. What if you say no? What if you change your mind at the very last moment? You're an alluring, charismatic oni that could easily find someone better than him. His chances are slim. Thankfully it will tone down once you're officially married. He might even come out of his shell and dare to be a little more assertive. "That's MY ring on her finger, j-just so you know", he'll warn, proudly. (It was a jewelry maker asking you what style you prefer)
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sexlapis · 7 months
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꩜ mine all mine
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❀ : toji x female! reader
. synopsis : toji sees the reader’s rare soft side.
꩜ cw : s4w, short fic grumpy! reader, toji & reader are married, toji & reader have a daughter, singing, lullabies
.. wc : 593
-> a/n : i think this is kinda shit & cringe but we go on 🥁. mitski singing in a genius interview inspired this :)
masterlists
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*
toji has always known that you were not exactly…a ray of sunshine. sure, he isn’t either, but you are something else. you were not at all mean or unkind in any way but you are crazy, grumpy, passionate…a ball of fire some would say.
a resting bitch face, hot-tempered, unapologetic, loud…you weren’t exactly who people think of when asked to name a gentle, soft woman.
with the continuation of your relationship with toji, you mellowed out. after all, to be loved is to be changed. but you still had your moments (everyday) and you were still a little grumpy, passionate, crazy, rageful person. but toji knows how to handle you. and he knows you to be a loving person.
even with your pregnancy and birth of your daughter, you still kept your personality, not letting yourself lose your sense of identity in the trials and tribulations of motherhood.
toji loves his daughter, mina, the new addition to your small family and he’s glad to be at home, caring for the both of you for six months. he’s convinced this is what he wants to spend the rest of his life doing. living with his two favourite girls and making them happy.
but one thing he has noticed since mina had been brought home, is that you always insisted on putting her to sleep, without fail. you would also insist on putting her back to sleep if she woke up crying (much to toji’s disapproval). and somehow, you have her asleep in minutes.
he knows it is normal for mothers to want to be around their child, but rarely would he put mina to sleep. you would ask (demand) him to let you hold little baby mina and tell him he could go back to sleep, which he does after ten minutes of persuasion on your end.
toji knows you’re not telling him something, though he does not think that it's a deep, dark secret.
so one night, after you and toji go to calm a fussing mina and you telling (ordering) him to leave, he stands outside with his ear pressed to the door, listening in.
what he hears surprises him greatly.
you were singing.
grumpy, angry, hot-headed you was singing.
your sweet, soft voice billows throughout the room.
‘cause my love is mine, all mine
i love, my, my, my
nothing in the world belongs to me
but my love, mine, all mine, all mine…
toji hears mina’s crying quieten, hears he little babbles and giggles, and then silence. now toji knows how you get little mina to sleep. you beautiful voice soothes her, lulling her into a deep sleep.
despite what others may think about how ‘unsuitable’ your personality was, you were a good mother, a kind and loving soul, perfectly compatible with your daughter.
toji quickly and quietly returns to your shared room, not wanting to be caught eavesdropping. he didn’t want you to know he overheard your sweet melody. you were like a cat, if he startled you after that intimate moment, you would most definitely get angry and embarrassed and probably never do it again.
you walk into the room, satisfied yet tired. it was 3am and you just wanted to sleep.
toji opens the covers for you to climb into and you curl up in his big frame, laying your head between his chest. he holds you close, kissing your forehead to say goodnight. you’re snoring within two minutes and he admires your stupid drooling face, absentmindedly stroking your temple.
toji will keep this newfound secret to himself.
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chiliyue-archived · 1 year
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What His Kisses Feel Like
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Includes; Riddle, Ace, Ruggie, Azul, Jade, Floyd, Kalim, Jamil, Rook, Idia, Malleus, Lilia, Silver
Gender Neutral Reader
Not Requested
Tags; Lots of smooches <33 gets a little bit suggestive 😳 but it's all SFW and sweet!
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His kisses feel inexperienced and hesitant as though holding back but not by his own will. RIDDLE is afraid and unsure of what love may come with; however, He easily succumbs to your gentle touches, fingers cupping your cheeks as he pecks you carefully on the lips - perhaps even your cheek as well, carrying meaning that he has yet came to understand himself but one he's already intoxicated with.
A smooch that leaves you in a fit of laughter, a grin spreading on both your lips as he holds you close. ACE'S kisses you unpredictably, lips chasing your own with fingers holding onto your chin with a teasing gaze in his eyes. His words are dripping with mirth as he teases your cruely but gives in because he is just as touch-starved too. His pecks leave a fleeting feeling within your chest, a hidden shyness behind his kisses as he melts within the moment. You're kisses are some form of drug to him, making him chase you for more.
Greedy and somewhat messy are RUGGIES amongst privacy. He steals any moment to press his lips on your own saccharin ones. He playfully eclicts giggles from you as he nibbles softly on your bottom lip. A would smirk plaster itself on his face, admiring the growing blush in your face though he too adorns a growing red that reveals just how weak you make him. Exchanges his food for a kiss; each bite of his donuts is one peck tohis cheek. Sounds like a good deal, hm?
AZUL'S is filled with so many emotions in the moment. Shyness, as he shares an intimate kiss that leaves him flustered yet secretly begging for more. Uncertainty, as he questions if his lips are too rough or if he pulled away too quick, eyes gazing at your reaction for answers. Azul who- despite his experience with getting what he wants, finds himself stuttering and fuming at the idea of asking a kiss from you; his fingers tightening around his pen as he imagines how soft your lips are, and well he can't keep his eyes off it either.
JADE, who knows every little thing he can do to makes you become nothing but a flustered puddle within his hands. His kisses are seemingly innocent, pressing against your own before becoming feverish whilst gloved hands rest on the small of your back. When you pull away, you're practically huffing for breath and the while he remains unfazed other than a slight red hue on his cheeks as evidence. He kisses you on the forehead, brushing your hair out of the way as he bids you a good morning or night or simply just as a quick goodbye. Jade who chuckles softly whenever you request a kiss from him, but no worries, he will never deny you anything.
His kisses leave bruises unapologetically. FLOYD kisses you whenever he pleases, latching onto any exposed parts of your skin with fervor. He won't stop kissing you until your lips are swollen red or when slight blemishes are forming for his eyes to see. He is quite greedy in his approach, greedy hands kneading at you as he pulls you in a kiss that will leave you breathless. His pecks are but unpredictable, pressing against your face suddenly before pulling away to admire the blooming blush in your face; and honestly, Floyd wouldn't have it any other way.
His kisses feel like genuine butterflies are resting among your face, feathery and light that coaxes a series of soft laughter from both you and him. KALIM loves to kiss in such a manner, drawing his lips from one spot to another, words of 'I love you' playfully falling from his mouth with keep lingering peck. While he may be an unpredictable force, there is one thing that is certain; and that is his desire to spoil you rotten, including physical affection. He kisses you until you physically have to pry him off, a small playful pout coming to him. But so long as you're happy, he'll be as well.
JAMIL, who becomes terribly shy during the beginning stages of your blooming relationship. His face becomes a slight red at the idea of kissing you. He's unsure of what to do. Where does his hand go? Should he pull away, don't you need to breathe? Though that quickly becomes disregarded when you gently press a loving kiss to his lips, his hands finding its way to your hips. He can't quite place his finger to the emotions it eclicts from him, but he feels incredibly greedy towards the affection you give, soaking it in and returning a few kisses of his own. He increasingly becomes more teasing as he grows more comfortable, pulling and yearning for your attention. Any form of affection from his beloved is worth more than a jewel can possibly hold.
His kisses leave you giggling and playfully rolling your eyes from all the things he did. ROOK is a charmer by nature. His words are bittersweet, rising a blush to your cheeks as his lips press chaste pecks to the back hand. Gentle fingers would also grip your chin, sending you a playful smile as he closes the gap between you, coaxing butterflies to dance along the surface of your chest. His touch is so gentle, his kisses feathery and leave you slightly shivering. And afterwards his lips brush against the shell of your ear as he serenades you and leaves you weak in the knees.
IDIA, who nearly curls up into a ball when you go to kiss him. His face is becoming unbearably hot, the tip of his hair flaring as your saccharin lips press against his own. His fingers become fidgety, unsure where to go or what to do, so he settles on connecting his pinky with yours. His kisses feel inexperienced, a hint of want as he secretly desires for another kiss. So instead he does that thing where you press your index fingers together, making silly kissy faces intil he garners the courage to do the actual thing. After the first kiss, you might sometimes catch him staring at your lips.
MALLEUS, who is a quick learner. His kisses go from hesitating brushes to your bare skin to lingering and fervish as he becomes more accustomed to romance. His kisses can be a mixture of different things; heated, leaving you breathless and chest burning from the lack of oxygen, but it was too intoxicating to stop. Soft and gentle, a contrast to the stigma placed against him as his lips trail against your forehead, lulling you to a state of peace. Curious, as he observes the different reactions he can pull from you, your composed demeanor wavering from a single peck to your collarbone.
He leaves you stunned and incapable of forming coherent words. It's as though he's knocked off your feet, and perhaps he did - both figuratively and literally, his arms wrapping away your waist as he closes the distance for a sweet kiss. LILIA is all about leaving you guessing and anticipating more, leaving a trail of kissing amongst your bare skin only to giggle and leave you hanging for more. Those fangs of his nibble gently on your bottom lip, relishing the warm hues that rises on your cheeks and the goosebumps that are left from his hands hot trail.
His kisses feel as though you are fluttering through the clouds, feathery and light to your features. SILVER, who treats you as royalty, kissing the back of your hand, wrist, and temples with the utmost care. Silver, who becomes absorbed in your kisses, senses drowning out into a rhythmic pulse. He only pulls away to take a breath of air, breath heavy against your lip before repeating the action again and again until his lips are brushed with magenta, puffy yet still yearning for more.
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moonkissedvisions · 2 months
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Astrology observations! (Vedic, Western)
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Consider:
• These observations are based on my personal experiences, intuition and knowledge, not research. Use your own discernment.
• I'm not a professional astrologer. I've been learning Western astrology since 2016 and I started learning about Vedic only 2 years ago. Astrology is one of my passions since I was really young but I didn´t focus on it as a profession. You can ask me questions or send me a message ofc :), but I don't offer any astrological readings or give professional advice.
• This is meant to be fun and entertaining, so if I said something that you didn't like or that you disagree with, be kind and don't take it personal. These are just really general observations based on 3-8 examples! If you want, we can discuss anything here as long as you are respectful.
• English is not my first language.
Now let´s read!
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I never experienced true telepathy until I met a Venus conjunct Neptune man. He would look at my face and know exactly what I'm thinking and feeling, and he would be so understanding of it, even when it was something potentially hurtful to his ego. These people are psychic lovers and I'm afraid they are often seen with abusive people who take advantage of their unconditional love.
Mars-Saturn aspects in synastry is an indicator of only wanting to have sex with only this person, or could be that the couple can go for long times without being intimate and not feel like they need it.
This may sound obvious, but Ardra nakshatra people are the ones that feel so renewed by crying. They could heal A LOT by just a long crying session. And while others think "crying won't solve your problems" Ardra nakshatra people know this is so far from the truth. I am an Ardra rising and sometimes i tell my friends that i cried for hours to feel better and they are all like "if I cried like that i would feel so much worse but I'm happy for you" lol.
Hasta nakshatra men are such women worshippers. Hasta women are so maternal.
If i wanted good financial advice I would ask a Venus in the second house person. Specially women. Ik they are known overspenders but I had many good experiences with them.
In fact, I've seen some cases where people follow the advice of Taurus/2nd house individuals more often than other people's advice. They perceive it as being more valuable, I suppose.
Anuradha nakshatra individuals love movies about friendship and gore/horror movies. I think they like movies in general too.
Krittika nakshatra people are often perceived as "mean" or they say things that others take too personally? Idk but I know 3 cases like that. They are so unapologetic. The 3 of them were perceived as asexual too.
As a Swati moon I've always been obsessed with beauty, decorating, fashion and clothes, putting on creams, balms, perfumes and other products and it makes sense!
My obsession with beauty wasn't healthy tho. I suffered from mental illness and could see the slightest imperfection on my face. That's another thing about Swati individuals, they perceive every subtle, small detail and may become obsessed with stuff easily.
True crime documentaries are a Ketu woman´s best friend. Probably Ketu men as well, although what i observed from them is more of adventure movies, movies about survival or nature documentaries. Teen Wolf is the perfect Ketu people TV show. Criminal Minds too. And they were both created by a Ketu man.
I love Mercury nakshatra women's voices. They are also so funny and sarcastic.
I know three cases of people with a mix of tropical pisces/neptune and aquarius/uranus having lucid dreams/dreams they can partially control, and dreams about flying. They also rarely have nightmares but when they do it's not something happening to them but to other people, and they are there trying to help lol.
Rahu women or rahuvians in general could feel like they don't even understand themselves sometimes. They're so independent and hard to tame that they feel like they need something to "control" them or some kind of restraint, but nothing feels effective or worth it at the end. I observed in my grandma, a Swati moon woman, that she used to brag about how independent she was, refused to stay married, hated feeling restrained so much and then she ended up wishing someone took care of her, gave energy and time to her, took the lead for her. She doesn´t necessarily regret being someone unconventional and independent, but she recognizes that now that she is old.
Uttara Bhadrapada and Rohini nakshatra people like learning and are so curious about some aspects of sex, they may even want to be sexologists. Could also apply to Ardra.
Cancer women get a lot of hate for apparently no reason. I even heard people saying they hate Cancer women as if they knew all Cancer women in the world?? I think the most simple explanation for that is that Cancer represents a lot of what's a woman's nature and power which are erased in a patriarchy.
Everyone talks about how Aries people get over anger so easily and never hold grudges but I've actually seen the opposite. In a lot of cases they are worse than the common "resentful" water and earth signs.
Aries in general have a hard time apologizing. It's like they never did anything wrong, the others were just unfair to them. I know SO MANY examples of this unhealthy expression.
A nice observation now lol is that I've never met an Aries that didn't have beautiful red lips and cheeks.
I noticed a lot of Moon and some Mars people have a significant amount of moles/freckles. The Spanish word for mole is lunar lol.
People with Mercury/Saturn aspects or Saturn in the third house felt "dumb" when young. Because of it, they made a lot of efforts and worked hard to know stuff and be smart by reading a lot of books, watching a lot of documentaries and educational videos, playing general knowledge games, learning a lot of words and languages, taking a lot of classes, playing memory games, chess, and even researching cognitive processes and brain health.
I've noticed that many Sun dominant women have this lowkey unhealthy expression of not being good friends with other women/feminine individuals. They're the type to say women are a lot of drama or that they can't connect with them even though they don't have a specific problem with women. They may be friends with only guys, or feel isolated from women. They also used to want to be a guy or dressed/still dresses tomboyish (there isn't anything wrong with that). I think in a way it's completely understandable and even healthy! But some of them express a lot of internalized misogyny and unconscious projections that they can't or don't want to recognize. When their expression is healthy, Sun dominant people are totally the warmest, best friends. And just the type of person others need around and in their life.
Saturn in the 5th house people are often self-taught artists. Some people perceive them as boring because they can be really afraid of expressing themselves. They give a lot in romantic relationships and often don´t get the same in return but they want to keep going because they care about loving more than being loved.
Sagittarius people make good parents in general and they are so underrated as parents. They give their children freedom, make them experience fun things like traveling, and often spoil them in a good sense! They also teach them a lot of valuable things and make them laugh!
Virgos are the most considerate and thoughtful people. They remember stuff about you even if you barely know them and they barely know you. They give you what you need at the right moment. They remember how you make your bed, how you fold your clothes and then they surprise you with an act of service. They know exactly what to gift each person.
Saturn dominant people/saturn in the first house/conj ascendant could suffer from a lot of anxiety and overthinking. They also criticize themselves for irrelevant stuff and that's so sad because everytime I'm near a saturn dominant I can't get enough of their energy! There is something really pleasant about them. They are also giving, considerate and nice hosts/hostesses. They make people feel included and heard. I made a personal observation about saturn nakshatra men here (based in this video)
Ceres-ascendant aspects/Ceres in the 1st are the perfect homemakers.
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Thank you for reading! See you in next post :)
Here you can see my last pac reading <3
images from pinterest, dividers by @muruffin
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moronkombat · 7 months
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just wondering if you had any headcanons for Bi-Han 🙏
I'm doing soft Bi-Han because I can and i will be unapologetic about it
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SFW
Not one for public displays of affection towards his partner or really anyone. Bi-Han is a very hardened man and to show affection is to be vulnerable
That does not mean he does not show affection. He does but only in the comfort of privacy
In those private moments there are a lot of small touches. His fingers gently touching yours and hand holding
Intimacy for Bi-Han is much more meaningful when it is done subtly. He feels closest to his partner when he hugs them
To hug is to completely expose his midline, a place he has been trained to guard. He opens his arms and invites another close to him? It seems wrong but with you it is perfect
He also wants to hold your hand frequently. Not in public but when you two are alone sitting together, on a walk, or whatever you are doing his hand will always find yours
When Bi-Han loves it is with every fiber of his being. He doesn't half ass anything and he never would with the person he is in love with
I see Bi-Han as needing someone to even him out. Someone who is not as defiant and hotheaded as him but not someone totally submissive. His partner is the soothe to his burn but the soothing does not extinguish it. Instead, it completes it
NSFW
One word. Cautious or, dare I say, timid? Not to say he is shy in the bedroom but he is generally preoccupied with the thought of not being too much for his partner
Not to say he does not seek out sex. He does but and he enjoys it but he gets caught up in his own thoughts and the pressures he carries with him
He benefits from a partner that offers comfort and reassurance to him, to tell him that he doesn't need to hold back
Once given that cue, he doesn't hold back. He will spend hours in the bedroom with his partner
As vanilla as it sounds, he really enjoys missionary because he feels it brings the two of your closer together. He can practically feel himself melting into you
He does not reject other positions, however. No way would he never. Once he's shown all these new positions, he cannot get enough. He and his partner will change positions many times throughout their time in the bedroom
His preferred place to have sex is in his bedroom. It feels more intimate that way but it is not the only place Bi-Han will have sex
Somewhere quiet, like near flowing water is another preferred choice. It doesn't end near water, he also enjoys sex when in water. Careful though, sometimes the water starts to freeze when he really gets going
Loves to give oral and is quite the master at it, however, as much as he loves giving he also loves receiving
Bi-Han generally starts off as quiet and tamed during sex. He prefers to hear his partner's sounds than his own but he is still but a man. Eventually he gets just as loud as you
thank you for requesting bi-han! i typically always default to soft bi-han so if the peoples want the roughness you can always request it!
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Every Little Bit | Billy Washington x SexuallyConfident!reader
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Summary: Billy has never been the confident one in the relationship. So you endeavour to make him feel how he deserves | Word Count: | Warnings below the cut!
Links to my Taglists: General Taglist | Billy W Taglist
requested by @randomdragonfires, sorry it's taken me so long to get round to it 😅
Warnings: mentions of a bad past relationship, p in v sex, mentions of feeling inadequate, confidence issues, masturbation (f and m), cumplay, voyeurism, use of sex toys, overstim
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Out of all the guys she’d been with, Billy Washington seemed the most innocent-looking.
He had the face for it. With those big blue eyes, messy blonde hair and the irresistible way he would nervously lick his soft pink lips when he was anxious.
She wasn’t ashamed to say that it excited her.
In complete contrast to that, he was tall, broad, with a sharp jawline and a sometimes striking gaze when his eyelids were hooded. Sometimes she found herself just looking at his hands as he wringed them, how his long, thick fingers curled around each other, tucking into his palms.
He was a somewhat introverted guy, she found out. But it was endearing. He was a listener, when he was sober, fading into the background as much as a tall guy could, his eyes darting to whoever was speaking. But when he had a drink in his hand and some beer in his belly, he began to come out of his shell a little, yet still softly spoken. Choosing his words carefully to not draw too much attention to himself.
It was a shame, she mused.
She chalked it up mostly to his ex-girlfriend, who, from what she’d heard, had done very little to quell his nerves and insecurities. In fact, it seemed like she nurtured them, in order to perhaps feel better about herself.
That was the biggest crime of all. Forcing Billy to feel lesser than he was.
Than he deserved.
In their moments of quiet within his flat, legs tangled beneath the sheets, with his head pressed between her shoulder and chest as she absent-mindedly played with his hair, he would often say.
“Why the hell are you with a guy like me?”
The question didn’t come from nowhere. It was a familiar one, and asked often.
She never knew why he’d even ask?
“You could have any guy you wanted”
But she wants him.
What about that is so difficult to understand?
She quickly discovered though, that it was because Billy thought he wasn’t satisfying her.
So often had his ex expressed disappointment, with faked orgasms or huffs of annoyance, that Billy thought himself incapable of giving a single female pleasure.
She thought it was absurd.
The way Billy approached sex was another thing.
It was clear he wasn’t confident, unclear more so if he ever had been. He’d obviously had his fair share of girlfriends, had sexual relationships with most of them, but had never really allowed himself to be vulnerable with any of them intimately.
Not to mention, she doubted he’d ever divulged what he liked.
A people pleaser, through and through.
She knew he was only human. That beneath that good boy exterior there was something. Things he liked, but wouldn’t dare to ask for. Things he might have wanted to do to her, but wouldn’t say out loud.
It was a mission, to find out what made Billy Washington click.
Being unapologetically sexual was never an issue for her. Nor communication with previous partners (at least on her side anyway). Not that she was perfect in her opinion by any stretch, but she always, always, knew what she wanted. In her eyes, there was no need to be embarrassed about what you desire, or about telling that to the person that you trust and love.
Clearly, Billy’s trust had been shattered before she came into his life.
She looked up from her phone as she heard the front door, the clanging of keys in a bowl and shuffling of long, muffled footsteps.
A mischievous smile grew on her face as she laid atop his bed, in only his long t-shirt and nothing else, one hand pressed between her mid thighs to warm and comfort the hand that wasn't scrolling through her phone.
She heard his exasperated sigh and saw his sandy, blond hair as he turned towards the bedroom, halting on the spot as his baby blue eyes locked onto her legs first, trailing upwards to where the skin was covered by his shirt.
His cheeks were flushed. He'd obviously had a pint.
"Have a good time?", she asked warmly.
She saw him swallow thickly, his full lips parting to remember to breathe, "Mmhm".
Flopping her phone onto the bedside table, she rested her head in her palm, "What's up?"
Billy had to shake his head a few times to rid himself of what he thought was a trance, no doubt doubled by the little bit of alcohol in his system, "U-uh, nothing…" he murmured, pulling off his jacket  and stepping across the threshold.
"Were you uh…waiting up for me?", Billy asked with a hint of hope in his voice that was difficult to miss.
She slides off the bed, shuffling up to his tall, broad figure, having to crane her neck to look at him properly through her eyelashes. Billy shivers noticeably as her hands drift across his chest, her fingers teasing the skin of his torso through the thin fabric of his shirt.
Though they'd been together for some time, even Billy understood, there was something different about tonight.
"What if I was?", she replies, a teasing lilt to her voice that makes Billy's hairs stand up on end.
He presses his lips together, feeling increasingly pent up by the second, as if her touch is setting off a chain reaction inside him, and he is fit to burst.
“What if I was thinking about you?”, she muses in a low tone, smiling when she feels him tense under her touch.
“About me?...”
“Yeah”
“In…what way?” he asks innocently.
She thinks, feigning disinterest for a moment as she bites her lip.
“I’ve been thinking, that you don’t tell me what you want”.
She watches his brows lower a bit in confusion, “...what I want?”
“Mmhm”, she replies, “in the bedroom anyway”.
“Oh”
She smiled with delight as his cheeks warmed, the redness blooming over his face, making his deep, blue eyes gleam from beneath his sweeping blonde hair.
Almost in a trance, Billy's hands drift beneath her arms to her waist, sucking the large shirt she wore to the actual shape of her body. She watched his face as his lips parted.
Billy didn't know what to say.
"I, uh…"
"You can tell me, Billy" she reassured quietly, watching his breath hitch, and his chest move more steadily as her fingers brushed the skin beneath his shirt.
She stopped when his hands came to hers, to gently, but firmly, push them off him.
“Not tonight…” he whispered, so quiet she nearly had to strain to hear him, “...please”.
How he said it was so vulnerable, his eyes blinking quickly, that she knew and took the cue to not even go about asking what was really wrong with him. She suspected it was something much deeper, something that needed a lengthy explanation, and one that right now he couldn’t give her.
She gave him a reassuring smile, letting him know that he needn’t feel like he was disappointing her.
She thought with a warmth in her heart, that Billy had come home, wavy from only one pint, only wanting to be held, have her fingers stroking his hair until he fell asleep.
So tonight, without judgement, she gave him comfort.
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And would let him come to her when he was ready.
She loved mornings like this.
Lazy, hazy Saturdays.
The middle of the weekend. Leaving the stressful memory of Friday, flung headlong into the lull that Saturday offered, and without the threat of Sunday, knowing that the work week would just continue all over again.
With the bed sheets tucked around her idly, she scrolled through her phone with heavy eyelids, she could hear the faint tapping of the shower in the background and the occasional splash of water as Billy washed his hair.
The dust was illuminated as it drifted through the air, the atmosphere one a kind of homely, cosiness. The music from one of the speakers in the other room filled the gentle silence.
It was so domestic, she could only describe it that way. One that filled a space inside her that made her feel as if she could stay like this forever.
She thought of him, in the shower, water running off of him and his blonde hair all wet and pushed back from his forehead with his fingers. And for some reason, though they’d been together a long time, the idea of that still excited her.
It was useless to ignore how she pressed her thighs together.
It had been a few days since she and Billy were last intimate. And though she tried the night before, it was clear as anything he was in no mood for anything overtly sexual, favouring instead to bask in their closeness. She didn’t mind it. She would much rather him state if he wasn’t in the mood, than for him to push it aside, and struggle to keep the momentum going and be passionate once they were in the throes of it.
Because that would only fuel the inadequacy Billy felt.
And she wasn’t having that.
Tucking her phone beneath the pillow, she sighed as her hand slipped between her legs, finding herself already wet and wanting at the mere thought of her boyfriend in the shower. If she weren’t so pent up, she would have said to herself it was slightly pathetic, to be this aroused just by thinking about someone she saw everyday naked.
But she just couldn’t help herself.
She pressed her lips together, suppressing a sound that bubbled up there as her digits moved through her slick folds, her hips jolting slightly when her middle finger began to rub in micro-movements over her bud. Imagining it was him. His long,thick fingers…
She sunk further into the bed, the idle sound of muffled music in the background granting her the confidence to part her lips and let her quiet moans rumble in her chest.
With one hand pleasuring herself, the other slipped beneath her shirt to touch her own breast, again pretending they were his, large and calloused, gripping at her flesh hungrily, squeezing her nipples between his fingers desperately.
That dull buzz began to throb between her legs, and she paid more attention to her clit where she increased her movements.
Her head whipped to the doorway, her eyes flying open and breath caught in her chest, all movements ceased.
Her first instinct was to blush in embarrassment as Billy stood in the doorway, his blue eyes slowly drifting from where her hands were tucked and then to her eyes, absorbing the hedonistic and shy expression on her face.
Billy just stood there, clad only in his sweatpants that hung lowly on his hips, and the appearance of his body so unabashedly bared, the little trail of dark blonde hair leading down from his navel beneath the waistband, made that little buzz only ache tighter inside her. His hair was towel dried and pushed back off his forehead, the sandy strands darkened with moisture and laying messily on his head.
She wanted to say something, but nothing came out.
He saw her swallow nervously, seeing her not know what to do as he’d happened upon her in a very delicate moment, so lost in her pleasure that she had not heard him turn off the shower and open the door.
Her mouth went dry as she saw beneath his dark sweatpants, that he was undeniably hard, his erection pressed against his thigh.
Billy breathed steadily, his eyes flitting down once he realised she had stopped what she’d been doing.
His throat bobbed and he wet his lips as he spoke, “Keep going”.
Heat crawled up her neck to her face, and she was certain she was blushing furiously at what he’d said.
Never in their relationship had she seen him speak to her like he just had. All low and deep in his chest, with his usually gleaming, blue eyes darkened by his pupils expanding into the colour.
After she was sure she heard him correctly, she resumed her motions slowly at first, getting back into the motion steadily as she had before. Her head felt like it was full of hot air, once she saw Billy’s large hand slip past the waistband of his sweatpants and grip his length in his palm. Even from her spot on the bed, she saw the way he fisted his erection, his eyes fixed on her core, all wet and hot, peeking out from beneath the hem of his own shirt.
It felt so erotic, pleasuring himself when he was right there watching her, annoyingly far away where she couldn’t touch him.
A sound largely between a groan of annoyance and a moan of pleasure as her movements increased tumbled past her lips. And she was sure that she saw Billy’s eyes light up as he saw how irritated she was that she couldn’t reach out to him. To touch him as she so often couldn’t help herself from doing when they were intimate with each other.
“Billy...” she breathed, hoping that her tone of voice would be enough.
“Show me” his voice was firm, but with a waver at the end as his motions beneath his sweatpants increased, his chest all tense as his core tightened with pleasure.
Feeling her face all hot with both embarrassment and arousal, she pushed her ankles apart even more, doing as he said and exposing herself to him as he pleasured herself, finally sinking her fingers inside her. Her arousal audibly clicked against her fingers as she hastened her ministrations, trying so badly to achieve fulfilment herself.
But with him in the room, so far away but within reach, all she felt was that she needed him to give it to her.
Billy sighed, his pink lips parted as his gaze returned to her weeping arousal between her legs, seeing the effect he had on her without having touched her.
Using his other hand, he pushed the waistband slightly off his hip, pulling his length from its confines to show her the effect that she had on him.
She felt her insides clench around nothing, hungrily wanting him inside her when she saw him pleasure himself, his fingers wrapped around his cock and pumping in sure, confident movements.
She thought that if she closed her eyes and opened them again, he might take pity on her and just come over to the bed and fuck her, as she so desperately wanted. In all their relationship, she’d never been left wanting for him, ever. She’d always been the one to give to him, to give him pleasure, and in the bargain have some fun for herself, as she so often enjoyed feeling as if she was the only one who could give it to him.
And right now, she thought he must look utterly pathetic, not even having the energy to beg for him to fuck her.
The ends of his hair had begun to dry and she felt her tummy do backflips as he moved from the doorway towards her. Without thinking, she had slowed her movements, expecting him to have finally caved.
The mattress dipped at her ankles where he was knelt, but other than the brush of them against her flesh, he didn’t touch her, and he certainty hadn’t ceased the movements of his hand around his length.
Now, knelt over her like this, his tall form casting somewhat of a shadow over hers, she felt her walls flutter around her own fingers with excitement, desperate to be stretched to accommodate to his length that was so close to her.
“I don’t think I said stop, did I?”
She felt her mouth go all dry, the strands of his hair moving with every tug of his fist on his cock.
Billy looked down at her, watching with a sort of curiosity as she resumed, taking his words to heart. Wanting to please him.
She’d never felt so small in her life.
And, fuck, it was exciting to see this side of him.
He began to pump his cock in earnest, a slight pinkness to his cheeks from the effort, lips parted in hurried breath. He reached over, into the bedside table and threw the mini vibrator he knew was there onto the spot next to her.
She looked up in brief confusion, he wasn’t going to use it on her?
She felt entirely pent up, just wanting him to touch her.
“Billy, please…” she caved and begged, her face warm with slight humiliation at having to ask.
He batted her hand away when she tried to touch his torso, watching with a blank expression at the brief annoyance on her face.
“You can touch me when you cum”.
He had such a serious expression on his face, it was difficult to detect any sign in him that he was actually enjoying this.
She swallowed thickly and gasped when her other hand pressed the vibrator against her clit, pleasuring herself in two separate ways as her fingers continued to shallowly slide inside her with a wet, soft smack of her arousal. Having these two sensations at once was borderline overwhelming.
And part of her was flushed, that Billy was just right there, pleasuring himself while he watched her.
She closed her eyes, but Billy was quick to it.
“Look at me”.
She felt her core tighten impossibly, her movements becoming quicker and more needy as she neared that point of no return. The point where she would lose herself entirely.
And so she pressed the vibrator against her clit harder, using her slick to move it around in micro-movements as she canted her hips up to assist the friction there. Her eyes pulled up to him, and for some reason, looking into his eyes as he stared down at her instead of watching the way he pleasured himself right in front of her, was much much more intimate and erotic.
Billy himself began to breathe heavier, his chest moving erratically up and down, a sheen of sweat over his skin there, his grip on himself tightening.
“You close?” he asked breathily, feeling as if he was about to explode with arousal.
She nodded quickly, and without noticing circled the vibe around her bud, aided by how wet she was, “Yes - yes, Billy -”
She felt her hips shift down into the bed, thighs shaking as her orgasm rolled over her in waves. Her fingers dragged through her fluttering walls, the vibrator still buzzing incessantly on her clit as the numbness flooded her limbs, warmth flooding through her to the place where she needed him the most.
She wanted to pull the vibe away, overstimulation beginning to gnaw at her pleasure, but as soon as the thought crossed her mind, she looked up at Billy again when his other hand reached down and held her wrist in place. His eyes boring down into hers, just daring her to say something in response.
But she didn’t.
“-fuck, Billy-” she whined, her stomach clenching and unclenching in brief discomfort as yet another rush threatened to overcome her. Her lips hung open, and she wanted to shut her eyes badly, to cut off at least one feeling so that she could concentrate on the other between her legs.
It was too much.
She thought with a sort of bashfulness that she wanted to cum again purely at the feeling of his fingers on her flesh.
She felt moisture around her eyes, the pleasure so closely nearing on pain, but never quite overstepping that fine line between them. It was almost as if she could feel every erratic beating of her heart through her core, the second orgasm completely draining all the energy out of her.
Billy moaned loudly, partly cut off with a full body shudder as he tugged at his length to completion. The moan lingering on his sweet voice as he painted her pussy with his cum, sighing as he continued to pump himself, as if the sight of her covered in his spend was just too erotic to comprehend.
She flinched, her hips jolting upwards to meet him when he leaned down to rub the head of his cock over her clit and entrance, smearing his cum over her pussy, in a gesture that tugged at that pleasurable spot deep in her gut.
The only sound either of them were able to make were the tired remnants of moans on their hurried breaths.
When her heavy eyelids lifted to him again, she thought he looked like a piece of art. Broad and tall, his flesh tied with wiry muscle, subtle beneath the soft surface of his skin.
And for a moment, as Billy rode out his high that seemed to take everything out of him, they simply looked at each other as if something in the dynamic of their relationship had irrevocably changed.
There was something else in his baby blue eyes she’d never seen before. A shift.
Something inside him had been awakened, like he had enjoyed exerting a power and assertiveness over her that he’d never tried before.
He reached over, his palm pressing into the space on the mattress next to her head as he leaned over her. Her lips parted in surprise and pleasure when he dipped down and slid his length past her slick folds and slowly sank inside her, stretching her already abused and tender walls out around him, moulding her insides to the shape of him.
Billy sighed, his eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of her pussy gripping him hungrily, already clenching around his overly-sensitive cock. But as soon as his eyes opened again, his face now close to hers as he pushed inside her to the hilt, the hair at the base of him brushing against her clit, she raised her legs to hook around his hips.
And felt as if she’d seen someone else she’d never met before.
Her eyes rolled shut as his palm laid flat on her tummy, drifting up and taking the shirt with it, palming needily at her breasts as he began a mercifully soft and careful pace.
One she had no doubt would become more eager.
Part of her worried she wouldn’t leave this bed for a long while. The other wanted to smile, happy that Billy had felt comfortable and confident enough, finally, to demonstrate what he really, really wanted.
It seemed trivial perhaps to some, that a confidence, even sexually, could give so much power to a person and enhance the personality that was already there. To help them feel as loved as they deserved to feel.
She���d suspected for so long that he’d been hiding something. Something he was too nervous to ask for. Fearing perhaps that she would judge him.
But as he pressed his chest to hers, his hands snaking around her waist and her buttocks to push her body up to meet his desperate thrusts, she only felt relieved and undeniably happy, that she had been able to give him this freedom.
And she thought with a hint of selfishness…
…that she could get used to this.
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I’ve seen someone else mention this, but I also wanted to talk about this
The erasure of queerness in the movie is something I definitely did not expect.
Sure, it’s a love story between two men, but grab Alex and Henry and make them a man and a woman, the movie doesn’t change much. Maybe monarchy instead of being homophobic and racist now it’s only racist, and they hate Alex not because he’s a man but because he’s brown. They kept it a secret because of monarchy’s racism, but love triumphs at the end. That’s why the movie didn’t hit as hard as the book. The movie is just some forbidden love movie, rwrb is a book where the main characters are in a forbidden relationship, but it’s not the whole point of the book.
Alex discovering his sexuality, Nora being bisexual, whatever Pez had going on, whatever June and Nora had going on, Alex learning about queer history, the historical lgbt love letters at the ends of their e-mails, all the references to queer history and literature, THE SHELTERS, monarchy’s homophobia (yes, it appears on the movie but it’s really glossed over. It doesn’t show just how homophobic they actually are in the book), Alex stating how he knows more about himself the more intimate (both in the sexual and non sexual sense) he is with Henry, Luna being gay and unapologetic about it and being exactly Alex’s queer role model, even before Alex knew he was queer himself, THE FUCKING SHELTERS
I’m so so mad about the shelters being missing.
Henry and Pez made shelters for lgbt youth, so they can never feel as alone as Henry once felt, so they can always have a safe space so they know there’s nothing wrong with them no matter what the adults in their life might say, no matter what the preacher or their classmates or the right wing politicians in their tv might say, where they can find hope, and friends, and a home if they never had one before, or at least, one where they could truly be themselves. The shelters are, I would say, crucial to Henry’s character development. He went from hiding, believing being gay was “the most unforgivable part of him”, not even trying to come out because he just succumbed to live an unhappy life in the closet, to someone who’s out, living with his boyfriend and running lgbt shelters with his best friend so young queer people can move past all the things he felt and believed time ago, so they know they are perfectly normal and loved and safe in there, as long as Henry and Pez are there they’re safe, they don’t have to hide anymore.
Henry became the queer elder he needed in his life when he was younger. The lgbt adult who could tell him than it would get better, no matter how bad it was at the moment, no matter if he couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, because it was there, he just had to hold on a bit more. Than there was absolutely nothing wrong with him.
Another thing than I seen changed than a normal person might not notice, but I did, because im obsessed, is the karaoke scene.
In the book, it takes place in something resembling a gay bar (maybe not exactly, but it’s full of queer people), and look at this
Three rounds of shots appear —one from a drunk bachelorette party, one from a herd of surly butch chicks at the bar, and one from a table of drag queens. They raise a toast, and Alex feels more welcomed than he ever has before, even at his family’s victory rallies.
Look again
and Alex feels more welcomed than he ever has before, even at his family’s victory rallies.
This book is about about finding community, finding yourself, finding love and letting yourself accept that love.
Do you think Alex in the movie has felt “more welcomed than he ever has before, even at his family’s victory rallies” at any point? Has he been with another queer person in the whole movie, except Henry, at all?? Because Nora’ sexuality was not mentioned at all no references nothing and with the whole Pez thing everyone could see Nora as just straight
Henry and Alex in the movie are kind of without community, alienated from it, they are, in my personal opinion, the kind of gay people republicans would consider “good gay people” who “don’t shove it on everyone’s faces and just wanna be left alone” (in the rwrb universe where they exist and are real not actual republican people watching the movie). They don’t really take a role on the community, in the book, Alex and Henry being queer is an important part of themselves, again, Alex feeling like he knows himself better, Henry whole internalized homophobia, their shared interest for lgbt history and literature, Henry and Pez making the shelters, etc etc meanwhile in the movie Alex and Henry just happen to be gay and bisexual, but it’s no deeper than that.
And don’t get me started on creating Miguel, a queer character, and making him the one to leak the e-mails or smth instead of a republican candidate
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