Appreciation 5
This one is very rough, and it doesn’t hit any beats quite right, but I’m pushing it out anyway. “Apples/Warehouse shenanigans” is the prompt, and what came to me in response was a version of the conversation that’s the primary component here (hence the title, sort of), which I’ve shoehorned into a semi-frame... ideally it would have become an actual story, but time zips along, and the story-pieces didn’t. (I should note that this little thing takes place in a world where season 4 never happened except for the Warehouse came back; after that, so did Helena.)
The appreciation proceeds, in any case, and earlier came four days’ worth of same: “Architecture,” “Bridge,” “Worry,” and “House.”
Voice
Steven Connor, Dumbstruck: A Cultural History of Ventriloquism. New York: Oxford UP, 2000.
[M]y voice is not something that I merely have, or even something that I, if only in part, am. Rather, it is something that I do. A voice is not a condition, nor yet an attribute, but an event.... [T]he voice always requires and requisitions space, the distance that allows my voice to go from and return to myself.... My voice can be a glove, or a wall, or a bruise, a patch of inflammation, a scar, or a wound.
****
Myka enjoys spending time in the Warehouse office. She likes it when she’s alone, naturally, and she’s perfectly fine with Pete, as long as he isn’t acting out; with Steve; and even with Artie, though in that case she’s always on alert, trying to perform as perfectly as she can.
She enjoys being there with Helena, of course, and in that case, too, she’s always on alert, trying to perform as perfectly as she can... but what she’s attempting to enact is less clear. It isn’t “Warehouse agent,” because she knows she accomplishes far less, work-wise, when Helena is present. For a while she’d tried to pretend otherwise, but holding the falsehood in her head made her feel like a fraud. And given their history, Myka doesn’t want anything fraudulent to intrude on their deepening accord.
But as much as Myka enjoys any time she spends with Helena, she has discovered that spending time in the Warehouse office space with Claudia is differently, maybe even commensurately, enjoyable, for it is also something very like therapeutic. This is because Claudia—when she is genuinely engaged in a project—talks. Her voice hums incessantly as she talks and talks and talks: to herself; to various screens; to deities, oracles, and ghosts; even to Mrs. Frederic, whom Myka usually presumes is absent and yet of course might not be... then again, she might be one of the those deities, oracles, and/or ghosts, based on Claudia’s mutterings.
In any case, the vocal chaos paradoxically soothes Myka. She knows she’s not being invited to participate in the conversation—or the “conversation”—so she’s free to absorb or ignore as she pleases. It’s how she imagines people who like a television on in an empty house probably feel about that sound: it’s there, it gives the space a sounded shape, but it creates no obligation.
Today, she and Claudia are working, companionably, with Myka silent and Claudia not, when a sharp question from the doorway upsets their yin-yang balance: “What are you doing?” asks Helena.
“I’m—” Myka starts, but the question was clearly for Claudia; Helen has marched to stand beside her, and she is looking down judgmentally at what Claudia is holding in her non-mouse hand.
Claudia looks up at Helena, looks down, then up again. “Eating an apple,” she says. She takes a bite and crunches away at it.
A defiant move, given the expression on Helena’s face, and Helena certainly seems to have read it that way: “Here?” she demands.
“You’re watching me do it, so I’m pretty sure you know the answer to that question.”
Again, defiant (or at least careless), but Helena calms, if only infinitesimally. “Isn’t that... unseemly?”
“It seems like I’m eating an apple, so I think it’s at least seemish. But I don’t really know what your Victorian-offended words mean, so maybe?”
Helena crosses her arms and nods severely at the apple. “Doesn’t it seem a bit... cannibalistic?”
“No? Because I’m not an apple?” Claudia’s tentative now, perplexed, and Myka can’t blame her.
“Given the architecture that surrounds us,” Helena says, freeing her arms to perform an all-encompassing swirl.
“Did you get hit in the head?” Claudia asks. “Maybe with an apple? No, wait, that’s Newton. No doubt you did a lot, but you didn’t discover gravity.”
“Entirely apocryphal, that. And he didn’t discover anything. How could one ‘discover’ a fundamental force that acts at all times upon every body on the planet? At any rate you needn’t worry about my head. What about yours?”
“I’m fine. Or I was until you called me a cannibal.”
“I called you no such thing, but in any case, I was making reference to the known affinity of this facility.”
Claudia squints at the fruit in her hand. “This place isn’t made of apples. And even if it is, I’m not made of Warehouse. Am I?”
“As Caretaker-in-training?” Helena asks, a muse of a question.
“Did Mrs. F swear off apples?” Claudia counters.
“I have no idea.”
“So you’re saying that if she didn’t, she’s a cannibal?”
“That is not in fact what I am saying. Did you not hear me utter the words ‘a bit’?”
“‘A bit?’ Isn’t that what British people say when they mean ‘you’re bathing in the thing’?”
“A bit and a bath being entirely dissimilar, I—”
“Here’s what I’m doing: never eating an apple again. Happy now?”
Helena smiles. Serenely. “Of course not,” she says.
It’s such a completely Helena response that Myka, who’s been trying to stay out of whatever this is, inadvertently contributes a small “hmph” of laughter. Helena gives her a look, one that doesn’t quite contain a wink. But it could have.
“Is there any pleasing you at all?” Claudia demands, and is that another look Myka receives from Helena? She resolves to ponder it later, as Claudia says, “What is it now?”
Helena, still serene, says, “The adage about the doctor.”
Claudia snorts, then offers Helena a big-eyed, sentimental blink. “But I love Dr. Calder. Don’t you?”
Helena bows her head—a “well played” nod of concession. “Of course. But I believe ‘the doctor’ is in this case a synecdoche for the medical profession.”
“Synecdoche, schmenecdoche. Which it turns out is hard to say... anyway, it’s the doctor. That’s what that daily apple keeps away,” Claudia says. “Queen Myka of Literalism, back me up on this.” Myka scrambles in her head for a way to resolve a synecdoche-versus-literalism battle to everybody’s satisfaction—scrambles also to resettle herself after Helena graces her with an “I know I’d win” lift of lip—but she’s saved by Claudia pushing on with, “And Dr. Calder’s the doctor as far as I’m concerned.”
“Consider a compromise,” Helena says. “For health purposes, you might eat an apple every other day. Ideally in some other location.”
“Location, location, location. But what if one of those other days is when Dr. Calder’s supposed to be there?”
Helena offers a little frown. Is she getting rankled at Claudia continuing the joke? “Perhaps adages aren’t edicts, darling.” The little condescension of “darling” suggests maybe so. “That is, perhaps they don’t behave as artifacts do, compelling a particular outcome.”
“Here’s another one: perhaps Warehouses aren’t made of apples, compelling you to call me a cannibal.” She looks down at her snack. “I don’t even like apples all that much, so no loss. Myka gave this one to me. Cannibalism-enabler,” she accuses, and she tosses her semi-eaten apple at Myka.
Myka wishes her reflexes weren’t so good: now her hands are sticky, their damp tackiness taking up space in her head even as Helena turns to her, apparently ready to spar. “I really don’t think you want to pursue this,” Myka tells her.
“Or perhaps I do,” Helena says, with a dangerous glint in her eye.
Claudia seems to have glimpsed the glint and determined that whatever danger it portended outweighed any benefit to watching what might play out. Backing away—as if letting Helena out of her sight would be dangerous in itself—she says, “If an apple was enough to set her off, Myka, you’re on your own.”
Helena watches her go. Then she says to Myka, with no glint and no hint of combativeness, “You seem less than pleased to have that in your hands.”
“It’s kind of mangled,” Myka says. “She doesn’t eat apples very precisely.”
“Are cannibals known for their precision?”
“I have to side with her on this one: I don’t think she and the Warehouse are made of apples.”
Helena smiles. “In all honesty, neither do I. But twitting Claudia is.... I’m sorry, but it’s entertaining.” She’s not wrong, but Myka can’t help frowning a little. “Don’t worry,” Helena says, “that isn’t my primary purpose. Ideally, I’d like to make her think.”
“About the Warehouse?”
“About who she is in relation to the Warehouse. Is, and is becoming.”
Myka finds Helena’s investment in Claudia sweet, but truth be told, a little overwhelming—and if it seems that way to her, Claudia surely finds it several orders of magnitude more so. But maybe the fact that they’re kindred genius spirits creates an easier bridge that Myka can’t sense? “Helping her with that becoming... it seems like a pretty noble goal.”
“Haven’t we established my lack of nobility?” Helena asks, and her increasing ability to speak lightly of that terrible, terrible time is yet another reminder that things are—and are becoming—different now. “There’s a bit of self-interest as well. Or rather, interest that is selfish, with regard to her future. Given that I myself was intended to be Caretaker. Until.”
This revelation levels Myka, who struggles to keep her reaction from showing. You should have known. Helena’s connection to the Warehouse has always seemed so strong... Myka has attributed it to her having simply been there for so long, even as she hated her imprisonment. In inadequate response, she begins, “I think that would have been...” An infinity of ways to finish that sentence, but the first one that comes to mind is “perfect.” But that seems a damaging thing to say, so she starts again, with “I’m glad you...” Now she wants to say “told me,” but that sounds selfish. She settles for a question: “Have you told Claudia?”
That seems to startle Helena. “Heavens no. She has no need to think about that sort of might-have-been.”
“I’m sorry you have to,” Myka says.
“Well. At this moment, I prefer the situation as it stands.” She tilts her head down at Myka. “Or sits.”
A low-grade giddiness that’s been swirling in Myka’s head since Helena invaded the office begins to ramp up its intensity. Years ago, she’d felt a quivery exhilaration begin to overtake her every time she was in Helena’s presence, every time she witnessed Helena being, whether with Myka alone or in any combination with others. She’d resisted it, then, as much as she could, but now there’s no need to fight it. If it’s a threat, it’s to Myka alone.
Helena chooses that moment to turn decidedly unthreatening: she reaches out and briskly plucks the apple from Myka’s grasp. It’s a considerate gesture, one clearly intended to save Myka the trouble of dealing with the mess; she should probably say a generic “Thanks, I appreciate it” in response.
But she can’t. All she can think is that now Helena’s hands are sticky too, that if she raised her own hands and caught Helena’s, now, they would join and hold, sugar-stuck, juice-wet.
She stays still. It’s not time yet. Not yet. (Yet. Yet. Yet.) But every new detail Helena shares is an intimacy, a small weight added to what Myka knows, added to what she wants, tilting the scale an imperceptible bit more toward resolution. Every new detail, that is, helps the resolution resolve...
“Unless you wanted a bite?”
Myka’s eyes rise from the hand that’s now extending the apple toward her to find a lifted eyebrow. A challenge?
Helena lowers the eyebrow and smiles, releasing the tension.
Not quite yet.
END
Note:
I was also thinking about the idea/problem of if somebody’s eating an apple in the Warehouse, they probably can’t smell any apples other than the one they’re eating, and that might offend the building—it might think the eater’s trying to appropriate its approval thunder. Or maybe it would get into a perfume competition with the actual apple, thinking that that apple was being the thunder-stealer, expressing its liking for the person... I was also wondering about varieties: like, does the building personalize the apple smells depending on which one(s) the person it likes tends to favor? Or it just Granny Smiths all the way down? What I’m really asking, I guess, is some variations on “how does the Warehouse deploy its weirdo aromatic ‘voice’?”
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Just wanted to plant an idea if you wanted a bit of fuel: Mahiru asking Yuno to come to her cell before everything goes down.
Edit: I forgot the ask didn't say it but this is part of Kyanako's incredible Order Of Attack AU!
Didn't mean for this to become a mini Mappi study but here we are ✨ Thank you for the request! I fully intended to write them hanging out, but it's more right before they hang out lol. Went a bit on-the-nose with foreshadowing, but isn't that the fun part? It has become Emotional Over Mahiru Hour...
I kept things vague, but TW for mentioning her boyfriend's state of potential self-harm
Mahiru tried not to act superstitious, she really did. As much as she loved the idea of little luck charms, or avoided easy signs of misfortune, it was easier to keep quiet about such ridiculous things.
Maybe catching a bride’s bouquet meant no guarantees; maybe there was no real harm in stepping underneath ladders, maybe a coin tossed into a fountain had no real magic to its wish. However, the one thing she knew for sure held power was a lucky presence. Being in the right place at the right time could alter everything. And today was the right time for something. There was this waiting in the air. The prison had been holding its breath. Mahiru knew it was time to release it all.
“You must be so lonely, why don’t you let big sis Mahiru keep you company?” She beamed at Amane.
She often recalled the good fortune that she and a certain young man had crossed paths on the university terrace. She used to laugh with him about the wonderful coincidence of bumping into each other outside of the bakery, then the convenience store.
Though she’d never spoken about it to him, she was also grateful for many occasions where she walked in on him at the precise moment to talk him out of something reckless. She always told him that they’d do everything together. He didn’t need to be alone anymore.
“I wish to be alone. I need peace of mind to think.” Amane turned away from the cell door.
It was a good thing, too. Mahiru’s smile wasn’t as convincing as she said, “o-oh. Of course.”
She made her way around the panopticon, hearing Fuuta pace his cell in anticipation. He must have felt it too, this holding of breath.
Or perhaps not. He turned down her offer for a bit of company, including a few more colorful words than Amane had. Mahiru just apologized for bothering him and headed back to her cell. She wasn’t sure where Mikoto was at this hour, but she didn’t feel like smiling through a third rejection.
She shook her head back and forth. She wished the motion could rattle the voices inside, she wished she could shake them all away. With her arms secured in place she could no longer cover her ears. She used to hum to keep them at bay, but lately they’d been too loud to stifle. They just kept on talking.
Their words told her the two were right. Nobody needed her company. No – nobody wanted it. Being together hadn’t helped her boyfriend. In fact, being together had been the very thing that got him killed. No wonder Amane and Fuuta wanted to avoid her.
So then, this was for the best. She would rather deal with the brief sting of refusal than stumble in one day to find them hurt… or worse. As much as she tried to avoid the superstition of it all, the voices reminded her that her very presence could mean life or death.
“Mappi, are you alright?” Mahiru hadn’t realized a tear had slipped down her cheek until she hurried to swipe it away in front of Yuno.
“Hah, I’m fine! Just fine.” It was impossible to fool her, Mahiru had learned, but that never stopped her from trying.
At least she always spoke tactfully. “Rough morning?”
Mahiru shifted her arms in her uniform, making a small sound of agreement.
“Can I do anything to help? What if I stay with you for a bit? I can do your hair, and…”
The voices were right. Amane and Fuuta knew it, too. Presences did hold power, and Mahiru’s was cursed.
But she would sound foolish admitting such a fear to Yuno. She'd heard plenty from the voices about how stupid and airheaded she was, there was no use in getting the same lecture from someone as grounded as her.
Mahiru managed a weak protest, unable to explain her real reasoning. Yuno was insistent. She didn’t give much of a choice. Could she feel the strangeness of the prison, as well?
At last, Mahiru allowed her shoulders to sag. Yuno was lucky. And kind. Having her nearby would do her good. Amane and Fuuta would be alright. Mahiru had tried spending more time with them after verdicts were announced. Now, she made a mental note to pull back. If her love couldn’t save anyone, at least she could spare them from her curse. They would be safe.
“Yes. Please stay. The truth is... I don't want to be alone.”
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so I have seen the new trailer for the live action ATLA adaptation and I think I'm actually feeling more optimistic about it. Generally when an animated product is adapted to live action, I want to see something new in the production and storytelling that justifies why this story benefits from being re-created in a live action format, while still maintaining the overall heart and spirit of the animated original. Most of the disney live action remakes, for example, have failed to meet this bar.
Where I'm feeling a little more optimistic with the ATLA remake is because the format almost necessitates some pretty significant structural changes to the story. You can't take something like season one of ATLA, which was incredibly episodic and designed for Nickelodeon syndication in 30 minute blocks, and stitch it into eight hour-long episodes on a serialized, binge-watching style platform like Netflix without making changes. You just can't.
What I'm hoping they do with these changes is that instead of trying to frankenstein the story together, they pick and choose which elements matter and which do not. And then I want to see the storylines they keep get greater focus and more elevation than they received in the original. One of the benefits of a remake is that you already have the finished project to build off- you know what matters, you know what doesn't, and you can work with that to craft a tighter story while giving appropriate expansion and depth to elements of it that might have been overlooked in the original. The way Suki and the Kyoshi warriors have been billed and marketed gives me a lot of hope for this- when Bryke were first creating ATLA, they had no plans for Suki to be anything more than a one-off character, but she ended up Sokka's endgame love interest. The new show has the benefit of already knowing this.
Same thing applies to characters like Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee. We already know where their storylines end up, so they have the opportunity to expand and deepen all three of them without worrying about making things up as they go or maintaining any sense of mystery. And they have a lot of opportunity to play with Ozai's character too, given they don't have to keep him in the shadows for two whole seasons anymore- we already know he's a hot older version of Zuko, that reveal happened in 2007. Since they don't need to hide his face, they can actually show a lot more of him a lot earlier in the story. Again, I'm hopeful for this given that the trailers seem to be showing a lot of extra scenes with the Fire Nation characters and Azula and Ozai are both featured on the promotional poster.
Now, will I like the changes they make? That's an unknown. I might. I might hate them. We'll see- but at least it seems like there will be changes that, hopefully, will serve to justify why this remake deserves to exist. I do not want to see a shot-for-shot recreation of the animated series. I can already watch the cartoon.
That said, I still want to see the spirit of the original preserved. So far I like what I'm seeing from Netflix- the world looks pretty good, the animals, while obviously CGI, look faithfully rendered, the costumes are miles better than what we saw in the 2010 movie (though I have my reservations about the saturation of the blue in the water tribe coats), and the characters all look pretty accurate to their animated counterparts. The lighting is dark because lighting is dark in every show these days, and I'm not 100% on the color palette. But I was glad to see some of the humor has been retained in the trailer- we see Aang running into the statue like in the opening of the cartoon, Sokka has a few one-liners, and the shot with Momo was cute. I'm a little worried Iroh's humor won't translate well into live action, but we'll see what they do with that (I imagine they'll have to cut back on some of the slapstick, Saturday-morning-cartoon antics anyways).
I like most of the casting too, from what I've seen so far. Dallas Liu looks like he's gonna be a great Zuko, Kiawentiio I already knew from Anne with an E and I think she'll be a perfect Katara, and I think Ian Ousley will grow on me as Sokka. His line reads sounded good in the trailer. I'm a little concerned about Gordon Cormier, he looks the part perfectly but he is so young and I felt like his delivery in the trailer was just...lacking a bit. But I need to see more of him to really judge. And I love the casting of Elizabeth Yu for Azula, I love that she looks like a tiny baby. No one will mistake her for the older sibling in this version. And of course the adult cast I'm not worried about at all.
(bully any of these children online btw and die by my sword)
Will this show be good? I don't know. But I hope it will at least justify its existence to me as more than just a nostalgic cash grab. That's what I'm looking for first and foremost.
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