#was the moment she ascended to favorite character status

[mad-madam-m]

kaede or lydia

Kaede.

#LOOK don't get me wrong I love Lydia #but honestly the moment 10-year-old Kaede shattered her piggy bank and hopped a train to Stern Bild to clear her dad's name #was the moment she ascended to favorite character status #and then shaming him into apologizing to her for lying to her for 10 years with just a glare #was the moment no one else was gonna touch her #Kaede's a good egg #Anonymous #M answers #meme me up Scotty #make me choose meme

[pokemoncreepypasta]

Forever Mine

[STORY SOURCE]

I live in one of those small towns with a big community. It feels like everyone knows each other, and parents would visit their friends and leave their kids to mess around with each other. Classes in school weren’t very large.

So when there’s news about a kid dying, it travels at god-speed. 

Everyone at school kept talking about the death of this girl who was probably a year behind me.

I didn’t know her personally. I wouldn’t have even been able to tell you her name if everyone wasn’t talking about her.

I didn’t want to pick up gossip about how she died. I decided to attend her funeral myself. Not because we were friends or anything, but I did want to show my respect for this girl and her family.

The local funeral home was within biking range of my house, so I set off.

I sat awkwardly as I noticed her parents. I’m not usually very good at picking up feelings from people, but I could tell that beyond their grief was disappointment and maybe even hostility.

They made me wonder what she was thinking about before she died.

After she was buried, I hung around the cemetery. I’d wished I brought flowers with me, but decided I’d give her some the next time I stopped by.

Around this time, I had been aiming to get a Sky Forme Shaymin, since it was one of my favorite Pokémon back then.

I had caught a wild Shaymin using the "Pokémon Modifier" cheat code. I was terrible at coming up with creative names. But then, I remembered the name of the girl and thought it would suit a Shaymin rather well.

“Skye.”

Little did I know that this would invite strange things to start happening to my game.

I wanted to keep this Shaymin in its Sky Forme whenever possible, so I planned on keeping it in my team 24/7, only playing during daytime, etc. I was a dirty cheater who liked putting illegal moves on my Pokémon, so I taught Skye to use Fly.

At the time, I didn’t know you needed to catch the Shaymin in Flower Paradise to receive the Gracidea Flower, so when I talked to the blonde girl NPC in Floaroma Town, I had no idea why she wouldn’t give it to me.

So I was stuck with a Shaymin that knew Fly. It was weird, and I never really grew all that attached to it. Eventually I boxed it, forgot I had it, and released it without thinking.

The next time I booted up the game, I got this message.

“The save file is corrupted. The previous save file will be loaded.”

My first instinct was panic. I didn’t have any time to think or process the initial message, because all my hours were gone. With nervous anticipation, I started up the save file to see what the damage was.

To my surprise, I found myself on an incomplete Seabreak Path. The south path to Route 224 was cut off, with a featureless Shaymin staring vacantly over the edge.

I checked my party, and found none of my team members.

Only a level 100 Dusknoir with the move Follow Me.

Very useful, I thought. I’d have to boot up my Action Replay to teach this thing Fly in order to get off the island later.

Checking my items, I noticed everything was gone, save for a single PokéBall and an Escape Rope. Neither of which seemed particularly helpful for getting me off this island.

Out of curiosity though, I decided to see if Shaymin would be at Flower Paradise. I started my trek north, lamenting the loss of my bike.

To my surprise, Shaymin was there, despite never having Oak’s Letter or triggering the cutscene with it. Its face was obstructed by flowers, but it seemed like its pink flowers were missing just like the one I saw before.

I spoke to the Shaymin, and a message appeared.

“I remember you.”

“But… You don’t remember me, do you?”

The wild Shaymin attacked, and my heart stopped at its name.

“Skye appeared!”

Featureless, like before.

I felt a knot in my stomach, not even caring about the game. Something was very clearly wrong with it, and I wanted to stop playing. But I decided I was already taking pictures of the weird stuff that was happening, and I wanted to document it in full.

Steeling my resolve, I went about my options.

Dusknoir only knew Follow Me, so it was useless to weaken the Shaymin.

Remembering the PokéBall I had, I tossed it at the Shaymin.

Most people would be ecstatic to catch a Shaymin with full HP in a PokéBall on their first try, but I got the feeling that the game was rigged. There wasn’t any triumphant music playing either, which didn’t help my feelings about it.

I tried checking my newly caught Shaymin, but my game froze upon checking my party.

Upon restarting the system and starting the game up, this message appeared.

“My heart is corrupted. Please save me.”

My save file was gone for real this time. The trainer’s name was “SINNER”.

I live in a pretty religious community, so reading this made me ill at ease.

Starting up the game again, I found myself in the Lost Tower, playing as a featureless Shaymin.

My only Pokémon was the same Shaymin, named SINNER, knowing Fly, Scary Face, Fake Tears, and Spite.

A text box appeared when I tried to leave the tower.

“Today’s the day.”

It pushed me back, preventing my exit. The only option I had was to ascend.

No random encounters happened, and all the trainers wouldn’t interact with me.

It went this way until I went to the top floor. I’m pretty sure there isn’t supposed to be a man and woman NPC standing in this spot.

"There’s nothing left to say.”

Interacting with them just prompted this text.

It was here that I noticed a staircase that wasn’t supposed to be there.

I found myself on the top of the tower. I stepped into a scripted event, and the Shaymin faced the edge without my prompt.

"It's a long way down... Are you ready?"

Hoping for some way out of this, I wanted to say “no”, so I could cheat my way out of the tower and get my game back to normal. However, upon selecting it, this text appeared.

"You've held back for long enough. It's time to go."

“SINNER used the Escape Rope.”

A battle started against the same Dusknoir as before. I was intimidated to go against a level 100 Dusknoir, but then I remembered its only move was Follow Me, so it was harmless.

I realized that if I let SINNER faint, I could go to the last Pokémon Center and escape the tower.

I used Spite, thinking that if I reduced Follow Me’s PP, the Dusknoir would use Struggle and OHKO my Shaymin.

“The wild DUSKNOIR used Follow Me!”

“SINNER used Spite!”

“But there was no target...”

Dang it.

Deciding to experiment, I came to the conclusion that there was no harm in screwing around with SINNER’s attacks until DUSKNOIR ran out of PP. I chose Fly.

“The wild DUSKNOIR used Follow Me!”

“SINNER used Fly!”

“The wild DUSKNOIR used Follow Me!”

“SINNER kept going and crashed!”

Not the KO I was expecting, but I took it nonetheless.

The game, of course, crashed as soon as my Shaymin’s cry played, leaving nothing but pleasantly ear-grating screeching sounds.

I decided to take a break from playing for a moment to process what I just witnessed. I had a lot to digest.

The only conclusion I came to was that ghosts are real and this was the same Skye as the girl who died. Which would sound insane if I didn’t have the pictures to prove it.

I choked back tears. I was afraid. Why did Skye want me to see this?

I wanted to put the game down and be done with it. But if she had a message to give me, then I felt like I had to see it through to the end.

I guess I vainly hoped she’d pass on and find peace if I listened to what she was trying to say.

Another message when I started the game up again.

“I can’t fly. I tried to.”

I found myself at Spear Pillar. The staircase to the Hall of Origin was in front of me.

My exit was gone, so I just went straight to Arceus.

A level 100 Arceus stood before me.  

Instead of sending out my Shaymin, it stayed in the field. It was now bleeding. Its status said it was fainted, but it was still able to battle somehow.

I felt cornered. There was no way a level 14 Shaymin could take on something like this. I tried to use Fly, hoping it would give me the same result as before.

“Can’t use that here.”

It wouldn’t let me use the move. Instead, I just outright try to flee.

“Can’t escape!”

“ARCEUS used Judgment!”

I braced for impact...

“The wild ARCEUS’s attack missed!”

...But was pleasantly surprised to see it miss.

“I’m not ready yet.”

The game made me flee automatically.

The screen faded to black.

“I’m not ready. I’m not ready.”

“I’m scared.”

When the screen faded back to the overworld, I found myself in the Distortion World. The portal that takes you back to the main world was gone, so the only thing I could do was explore.

I found another Escape Rope while looking around.

It was the only thing noteworthy I could find, so I started trying to think of ways to get out of here.

I tried using Fly, since SINNER still knew it.

“There’s nowhere to fly to.”

Figures.

Trying to test my other options, I went to my bag and tried using the Escape Rope.

Of course, the “There’s a time and place for everything” message still appeared.

Deciding to mess around until I got results, I went to give the Escape Rope to SINNER.

“Don’t suppose you know what to do with this?” I muttered.

The game crashed again, and it assaulted my eardrums once more. I sharply inhaled, wondering if I touched a nerve.

I took a deep breath and started the game again.

My character’s name was now Skye.

I started in Floaroma Town. The first thing I did was rush to the Pokémon Center to check on my Pokémon in the PC. Of course, they were all gone.

I’d grieve for them later, though. Maybe Skye would be nice to me and give them back.

While I was in the center, I figured it might’ve been good to heal the faint status off of the Shaymin.

Sure it is. Glad you can tell when something is suffering, nurse.

Heading outside, I talked to the blonde NPC.

“You should always give flowers to someone who has passed away.”

“It’s rude not to.”

“You got the Gracidea!”

I was suddenly feeling very guilty for not leaving flowers before.

Wondering if I could fix the poor Shaymin in my party if I used the flower on her, I went to try it.

“It won’t have any effect.” 

Of course not.

The blonde NPC turned into my Shaymin. I spoke to her.

“That won’t help me.” 

Yeah, I thought not.

At a loss of ideas on what to do next, I absentmindedly made my way to Valley Windworks and walked around in the grass.

A wild Sky Forme Shaymin appeared.

I sent out Skye, of course.

I chose the fight option, and the battle continued without me selecting a move.

“The wild SHAYMIN used Reflect!”

“Skye’s rage is building!”

“Skye used Cut!”

“She hurt herself in her confusion!”

The Sky Form Shaymin was knocked out in one hit, despite the game telling me Skye had hurt herself.

Back on the overworld, I found the mangled parts of the Sky Forme Shaymin lying in the grass. I inspected them.

“Please put me back together.”

It gave me another prompt, and I chose yes.

The screen faded to black.

And then Skye appeared again in a black abyss, with Skymin ears and flower. My trainer was nowhere to be seen.

I checked my party to see that Skye had changed again. Her cry sounded like a distorted mix of Shaymin’s two forms.

I went back to the overworld and was unable to move. Instead, a dialogue box appeared.

“Can you hear me?”

"Thank you for caring about me.”

"I can fly now.”

“Because...”

“I love you.”

My heart skipped a beat. My hands began to shake.

“You must care about me too, right?”

“So... I’m going to stay with you.”

“I won’t leave, not without someone who loves me.”

“Will you fly away with me?”

My shaky hands went to say no. I didn’t want to be like her.

"...”

“I’ll wait for you.”

“I’ll change your mind.”

“You’re mine now.”

“You’re mine forever.”

With that last line, the game froze.

The first thing I did was take the game out of the system. I decided to drop off all my Pokémon games at the nearest GameStop. I didn’t want her talking to me anymore.

So why do I feel like she’s still here?

#Pokemon Creepypasta #Pokepasta #Shaymin #Forever Mine

[nctasja]

CONSIDER ADOPTING... NATASJA’S FINAL FIANCÉE

name. utp.

title. princess of any country.

age range. 25-34.

relationship status. engaged to natasja magnusdottir, princess of iceland.

possible faceclaim options. lashana lynch, phoebe dynevor, ana de armas, sonoya mizuno, parveen kaur, josephine skriver, olivia cooke, kiki layne, jung hoyeon (on graphic); ashley moore, mishti rahman, alia bhatt, yaprak medine, melanie laurent, kelly gale, leigh anne pinnock, jasmine tookes, zoe kravitz, astrid berges frisey - really, anyone works, these are just some of my favorites at the moment! .

group. @highsocietyhq​

( natasja magnusdottir ), the ( alicia vikander ) fc would like a ( fiancée ) with ( any female fc ). the mun ( REQUIRES ) you to contact them before applying. [ princess of utp ]

basically i am looking for someone politically convenient for natasja to marry! she's known for arrangements, but i'd like to someone that she can at least get along with that understands her motives and can sympathize with her hunt for power. were they power hungry in their own country? did they lose the throne to another sibling? are they literally just down for anything? anyone could work, feel free to combine this with other wanted connections/adopts, as long as we can agree they can get along decently!

some things you need to know about natasja’s current plotline: first of all, she’s well known for her neverending list of engagements. she’s had 13 fall through since she was a child - this would be the lucky number 14! just a few months ago, her brother ascended to become king after their father’s recent death, and since then she’s been left sort of adrift. she won’t be able to challenge him for the throne until she’s thirty-five, so she has nothing to do except get her own life together before she inevitably becomes queen. and after she was accused of murdering her stepmother, she’s got a lot of cleaning up her image to do! your character would have to be alright with playing nice for the cameras and a lot of fake bullshit. 

please contact me if you’re interested! i am very open to any moving around and changing a lot of things - just let me know what you’re thinking! 

OTHER ADOPTS/WC’S THIS CONNECTION COULD FIT:

crown princess of morocco

princess of luxembourg

( elyse zollern ), the ( emma rigby ) fc would like a ( younger sibling <30 ) with ( toby regbo, hunter king, cameron porras, fc utp ). the mun ( REQUIRES ) you to contact THEM before applying. [ prince/princess of prussia ]

( catherine stuart ), the ( sasha luss ) fc would like ( cousins [ 20-40 ] ) with ( any half/white or white fcs! ). the mun ( REQUIRES ) you to read THIS before applying. [ royals of slovenia ]

( ireti olowu ), the ( savannah lee smith ) fc would like a ( 2 brothers & 1 sister [ 30+ ] ) with ( yahya abdul-mateen ii, winston duke, meagan tandy, any appropriate fc ). the mun ( requires ) you to read this before applying. [ royals of nigeria ]

( louise de saxe-cobourg et gotha), the ( merritt patterson ) fc would like an ( university friend [ 26-30 ] ) with ( laura berlin, eli goree, patti harrison, utp ). the mun ( REQUIRES ) you to read THIS before applying. [ title or no title utp ]

( aisling uí briúin ai), the ( margaret qualley ) fc would like a ( rival/enemy [18+] ) with ( sarah shahi, wakeema hollis, manny jacinto, utp ). the mun ( REQUIRES ) you to read THIS before applying. [ title utp ]

#hshqadopt #sort of #it's a wc but i wanted it to be rebloggable so legally it's only sort of an adopt #anyways <3 bring natasja's fiancee <3 #wanted connection #lashana lynch fc #phoebe dynevor fc #ana de armas fc #royal rp #royalty rp #rich kids rp #skeleton rp #established destiel

[julia-highstorms]

Undermount series: The Heir to House Nightbloom

Chapter 1 - Shocking News

Summary: The story revolves around Luxia (my MC), who has her life turned upside down when both her parents die and she’s back to Undermount, to live with her grandfather, Sir Emrys Nightbloom, a respected scholar and private professor to the most influential houses. Now, being an outsider to the elven society, she must learn its culture and traditions and how to fit in (or not). While falling in love with the heir to the Ascendent House, Tyril Starfury.

Author’s note: I am very excited with this idea and it had been playing in my mind for a while now, so I thought “what the hell!” and I am finally posting the first chapter here! I wanted to write a couple more chapters before start posting it because I know me and it will take me 84 years to post a new chapter 🤦 but oh welp. Maybe posting it now I force myself to write more regularly? Who knows. Anyway, sorry in advance for the lateness of upcoming chapters.

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Pixelberry Studios.

Rating: T (trigger warning: death, violence)

Pairing: Tyril Starfury x Luxia Nightbloom (F!Elf!MC) - read more about them here

Word count: +1.8K

___________________

Chapter 1 - Shocking News

The young lord leaned comfortably against his favorite armchair and looked outside the window, admiring the House Starfury Gardens. 

That was one of the few moments in which he could sit down with a book in his hands and relax. Just relax.

As Tyril reached majority, more and more responsibilities were passed down to him by his father - Valir Starfury, the current Lord Starfury -, which the young man accepted proudly. Sooner or later, they knew he would inherit that duty as Valir aged and his health declined, so it was only natural that his first born child would take his place as the head of the House. 

So, those rare moments of complete peace were always welcoming to the young man. Whenever he had a spare moment in his agenda, Tyril would lock himself in his study room to read and let his imagination run free. He firmly believed that few activities could bring him such joy as reading.

But today, somehow, he was unable to do so. He tried to pick up where he had stopped in the book, but was unable to focus. So he picked his favorite map and opened it. Sometimes, when he was unable to concentrate, he liked to open the old map and study all those places he had read about. Whitetower, Port Parnasus, Flotilla… Places he was sure he would never see in real life, only in his imagination.

But that proved to be an equally unsuccessful activity. The young lord did not know why, but he was feeling restless today. 

Finally giving up after his fifth frustrated trial, Tyril decided to just relax. He watched the scene that unfolded in the house's gardens through the large windows for a few moments, the world complete serene. 

He wondered to himself why the gardener was watering the plants when it was clear that it was going to rain soon. The sky was filled with dark and low clouds.

But his thoughts were soon interrupted when Adrina stormed into the room. He turned his face to his younger sister and raised a single eyebrow, surprised by that display of rushness.

"My dear brother, I've finally found you!" - she panted out of breath, her cheeks flushed. - "You won't believe what happened!" - but even before he could ask her what indeed had happened, she spilled it in a rush of words: - "Sir Nightbloom's son and daughter-in-law are dead and his granddaughter is back to Undermount!"

___________________

A week earlier

House Nightbloom was fated to great things.

At least, that was what Emrys Nightbloom stated and firmly believed. 

Those from that house were known to be great scholars, masters of a greater magic and undying loyalty, with generations and generations of tutors and professors who dedicated their lives to teach young lords and ladies of the nobler houses, gaining status and prestige through the centuries. 

They were one of the ancient houses, but had lost their importance through the years since the Great War, when Gustaf Nightbloom decided to flee instead of staying and fighting. But as Sir Emrys himself believed, better be an alive coward than a dead hero, because those that were able to move worlds were the alive ones. And that was what the past generations of the House Nightbloom had been doing since their embarrassing display during the fatidical war. They were great strategists and were able to restore some of their previous glory through the last millennia. 

They would never be a noble house - unless one of their descendants married a noble house -, but they attended that social circle closely. 

Sir Emrys Nightbloom was its current head and a very respected professor within the elven society, having taught some of the great houses' lords himself. Such as Lord Valir of House Starfury, the current Ascendent House. And his heirs, Young Lord Tyril and Lady Adrina. By this, it was easy to presume how old he was.

But Sir Nightbloom had never been ashamed of his age. In fact, he was very proud of it. He had lived longly and greatly, and was among one of the wisest citizens of Undermount.

And being that wise, he knew that he was doomed. House Nightbloom had no direct heir.

Of course it wouldn't cease to exist, but when he died - which he was pretty sure would happen sooner than later. It didn't matter he had been saying that for the last 30 years, he knew this year he would definitely go -, the House's leadership would pass on to his younger brother, Qildor, who wasn't much younger than him, but much less… wise. His hobbies were playing card games and drinking lots and lots of elven wine. Old Emrys was worried that his brother could bring shame and dishonor to the House Nightbloom again, after all those centuries of hard work from their ascendents.

If only his only son, Kal, hadn't decided to be an adventurer and leave Undermount… Sir Nightbloom would be feeling much more secure about the House's fate.

It was a cloudy Saturday afternoon, and the old man found himself in his garden - besides teaching, Sir Nightbloom's great passion was taking care of his collection of exquisite flowers and trees -, when Siveril, the butler, came running toward him.

"Urgent news, Master Nightbloom. I'm afraid they're disturbing."

"Well then, shoot!" - he said, not taking his eyes off of his majestic yellow hibiscus.

The other man nodded and stepped closer to whisper into his ear. Sir Nightbloom's eyes widened and he even let the pruning shears he was holding fall onto the floor, as shock spreaded through his body. 

"Are you sure?" - he asked after Silveril helped him to sit down on a bench. 

"I'm afraid so, sir."

"Both of them?" - the butler nodded. - "And… and… what about Luxia?" 

___________________

Everything happened in a blur.

One moment, she was laughing and talking with her parents, and the next moment, the small village they lived in, Riverbend, and their house was invaded and they were attacked by a bandit raid that took the lives of a dozen of villagers. Including her parents.

Luxia's mother promptly ordered her to hide inside the supply closet in the kitchen. She heard everything, her parents' cries as the blade slashed through their flesh, drawing out blood, while she forced herself to be as quiet as possible as they were being killed.

She crawled out of her hiding place only after she was sure that the bandits had left her house.

The young elf was found by Kade - her neighbor and childhood friend - and other villagers just hours later, after the bandits had been dealt with. The young human's parents had been killed too, but luckily, he was outside at the time of the attack.

The last two days went on a frenzy. The village's physician had examined her and stated that, although she didn't suffer physically, she was deeply traumatized. She had the vague memory of being asked if she knew about any relative she could have, and she told them about her grandfather in the elven city of Undermount, to the north. 

She still could hear their screaming ringing in her ears, and the scene she saw when she left her hiding place. She found her parents lying on the floor, both dead. There was so much blood, the furniture and walls were stained by it. Their bodies dilacerated. They were stabbed to death.

She kept staring at them, unable to move or to do anything. The neighbors' screamings and cries for help could be heard from outside as the bandits invaded other houses, but Luxia couldn't pay attention to any of it. All she could think about was that Mom and Dad were gone.

Now, two days later, she was again staring down at her parents' and other villagers' bodies. Kade's parents were among them. Luxia was lined up with the other survivors, paying their tributes to those who had lost their lives in that vicious attack.

Even though Kal's and Irin's corpses lied in front of her, covered by blankets, waiting to be buried along with others, she still felt numb and overwhelmed by all of those events. She was unable to let a single tear out.

The burial was long and painful, everyone helping and digging graves for the dead, and it took the whole day. Those who had lost their families were being taken care of by other villagers. A kind farmer took her and Kade under his protection.

She was left in one small bedroom by herself and her thoughts. The young elf lied down and tried to sleep, but she just couldn't shut her eyes. Her mind kept replaying the events of the past couple days again and again and endless questions popped up in her head.

How could that have happened? Could she have done something to save her parents? Should she have been killed with them? What was she going to do now? She had nobody. Of course, the people of Riverbend wouldn't throw her away and she knew a thing or two about medicine and cures… she could work with it.

She tossed around the narrow bed. Mom… Dad… What was she going to do? She already missed them. She felt so alone… 

And then. An idea popped up in her head. 

The girl sat up and looked over to the old desk across the room. Not thinking twice, she went over there, lighting up the candle and pulling a blank sheet of paper and a pen. And started writing.

Emrys Nightbloom. That was the name of her grandfather. She knew her father and he didn't see each other in the eye, but he was the only family she had left.

Although she had grown up in Riverbend, and she had few friends there, like Kade, they weren't her family. And she had been and would always be treated differently. Because she was an elf. Maybe, among others like her, she would feel less of an outcast. Although she didn't have much faith in it. 

Her grandfather and she were nothing but strangers, but still, she was positive that he would take care of her. He was family after all, and one thing she knew for sure was that the most important thing in the elven world was your House. Your family. So, she had to try something. 

That same night, Luxia sent away her letter. She didn't know exactly her grandfather's address, but she knew that just writing down the House's name meant something. Her father would often say that House Nightbloom had a sort of status. Hopefully, it was status enough to bring her letter to grandpa.

And so, only after three days she had sent her letter and had buried her parents, an answer from Sir Nightbloom himself arrived and he was taking her under his care.

Luxia left Riverbend that same night, taken by her grandfather's maid.

___________________

Tagging: @hellomynameisdevi @thequeenchoices @srta-give-me-my-jax-rl @soft-for-drake @ohsnapitzlovehacker @melodyofgraves @sitsoncornflake @keviriass @lady-kaya-duskraven @tealtranquiltatter @vanillamaa @my-remedy-is-euphoria @choicesloversstuff @tyrils-star  @lxdy-starfury  @caaliyahxx @choicesarehard @fireycookie @sophie-summer @dalishessence @choicesficwriterscreations  (and if you’d like to be tagged, just tell me 🙂)

#tyril starfury #tyril x mc #tyril starfury x mc #blades of light and shadow #playchoices #choices stories you play #playchoices fanfic #playchoices fanfiction #choices fanfic #choices fanfiction #undermount the series #luxia nightbloom #tyril x luxia

[akatsuki-shin]

Review: 天官赐福 Tiān Guān Cì Fú (Heaven Official's Blessing)

Notes:

(Very) long post ahead

Contains spoiler

This is my personal review and does not represent the entire audience, you are free to agree or not agree with what I’ve written here

Feel free to reply/send me a message if there are things you want to discuss

Summary:

The most beloved Crown Prince, pride of the Kingdom of Xianle with abundance of talents and achievements, Xie Lian, ascended to Heaven and became a martial god at the young age of 17 on the path to fulfill his dream "to save the common people".

Three years after his ascension, he saw his kingdom beginning to decline and in order to save his beloved country, Xie Lian defied the rules of Heaven and descended back to the mortal realm. Nevertheless, instead of saving them, his interference ended up accelerating the fall of Xianle, annihilating the once prosperous nation under the war of rebellion and a mysterious, horrifying plague.

The people who once praised and worshipped him day and night now condemned him, his devotees left him, they burnt his temples and divine statues, and Xie Lian himself was ultimately banished from the Heaven.

He ascended for the second time a short while later, but was banished once more very soon after. Since then, he lived among the mortals - surviving by collecting junks as he was now branded as the "God of Misfortune", the "Scrap Collecting Immortal".

800 years later, Xie Lian ascended again for the third time. Though having neither temples nor devotees, he accepted his responsibility as a martial god and carried on with his duties until one day, there came a certain, incidental encounter with a mysterious youth clad in red.

STORY: 7/10

TGCF overall is an (almost) complete, satisfying read with well-written twists and development.

Unlike the two previous MXTX's novels, the main pairing here (HuaLian) did not have to go through complicated misunderstandings and is a beautiful representation of love and devotion. Of course, this means there is a lack of conflict between them, but considering all the trials and tribulations the characters have gone through, this lack of conflict feels like a relieving fresh spring amidst the painful and exhausting journey throughout the entire five books.

The best and my most favorite plot twist is the Earth Master Ming Yi having been dead for a while, and the "Ming Yi" we know turns out to be the Black Water Submerging Boats, He Xuan. I'm the kind of person who always suspects characters, but even my furthest suspicion was "only" him being the Reverend of Empty Words, not He Xuan.

Truthfully, prior to reading this novel, I've seen Shi Qingxuan's "MING-XIONG, I'M SORRY x9999" post before without context, and I thought Ming Yi was going to die a tragic death because of Shi Qingxuan. Turns out it's kind of the opposite, huh? Nice one, really.

I also like how each character's "end" feels satisfying. Especially for the villains, they didn't necessarily have to die some tragic, vengeful death, but was provided with an ending that perfectly fits their background story and deeds. For example, in most stories, a character like Xuan Ji would be most likely be given some well-deserved punishment as her death, given everything she's done. But no, in the end she was given a reality check and was finally able to let go of her hundreds of years grudge. And then Qi Rong - I will talk more about him later on in the "Character" section.

One part I really love is the Extra Chapter about the Cave of Ten Thousand Gods. The chapter itself overall is mostly nonsensical and chaotic, but it was just so touching when HuaLian created a "Little Hua Cheng" statue to accompany Xie Lian's "Crown Prince who Pleased the Gods" statue, especially when this Little Hua Cheng statue gave Crown Prince Xie Lian statue a flower, and then Crown Prince Xie Lian received it, lifted him up and carried him in his arms. This one was maybe a bit biased because as much as I love the current HuaLian, I have a special soft spot for the young Xie Lian carrying, cradling the little Hua Cheng back then in the past. ;v;

Though, with all due respect, I must say that TGCF is actually below my expectation.

The biggest issue I have with TGCF is... What is Xie Lian's motivation? What drives him to move forward in the story? What is even the whole story's purpose?

I'm not quite sure how to word this properly, but let me give some examples.

When you read Harry Potter, you know immediately that Voldemort is the bad guy and he must be defeated.

When you read the Lord of the Rings, you know immediately that the One Ring must be destroyed to prevent Sauron from regaining his power.

Or, in MXTX previous works...

In SVSSS, it was clear since the beginning that Shen Yuan's mission is to fix the "Proud Immortal Demon Way" if he wants to survive.

In MDZS, it was clear that Wei Wuxian, together with Lan Wangji's, needs to unravel the mystery behind that fierce left arm. All of their past stories and WangXian getting together in the end are just something they discovered along the way, not the initial "motivation" that drives the character to move forward.

What about TGCF? The Xie Lian who ascended for the third time actually looks like he just wants to go along with the flow, carrying out his duties day by day with responsibility. When Bai Wuxiang later, later, later on appeared to haunt him again, it didn't seem like Xie Lian has any ambition to hunt him down or exact a revenge, just that he wanted to forget about Bai Wuxiang and never recall anything about him ever again. The main character looks like he's not being driven by anything, just...carrying on where the plot takes him? It's just missions after missions and whatever huge things happening in between is just something they accidentally passed by along the way.

At this point, the only purpose of the story I can think of is bringing Hua Cheng and Xie Lian together. The romance is great, I have no complain. But if it's just that, no need to jammed-pack 250+ chapters just to make two people getting together?

Speaking of which, I also think that the way new characters keep being introduced all the way to almost the final showdown of the story feels info dump-ish, because the background story needs to be dropped there along with the characters, but then most of these characters fade away immediately after.

For example, the previous Civil God before Ling Wen, who looks like he’s going to pose some real trouble, but then was easily defeated and was never mentioned again afterwards. And this is especially true for He Xuan; after such a huge arc where he committed such extreme things, after that he was barely mentioned again, even having his “strong impression” leveled down by the joke about him being the poorest Calamity and owing lots of debts to Hua Cheng.

Basically what makes TGCF a long story is because there are too many stories about the side characters in addition to the main characters that are dumped out of the blue instead of slowly being revealed along the way.

Though, I love how the story gradually unravels the "Four Famous Tales" because initially, I thought it wasn't something crucial, and I wished they could've done this for other characters, too.

There is a little bit of plot holes here and there, as in who actually cut open Jian Lan/Lan Chang's baby and made it a ghost, and for what? Even if it turned out that she just met a bad guy or nobody important, at least provide an explanation in one paragraph? Especially because important side characters like Feng Xin and Mu Qing are involved here, so I'm pretty sure us readers need some explanation.

And more importantly, how can Jun Wu become the Emperor martial god? There's no mention about him ascending, only that he annihilated a dynasty of gods before sitting on the throne of the Great Martial Hall. But how can he, like, emitted god-like aura and not some evil aura? Is it because he used to be a god? But he's a ghost? Explanation where???

The gags and comedies are pretty fun, but honestly, the more I read, the more they ruin the atmosphere and suspense, added with the uncalled PDA between Hua Cheng and Xie Lian even during the most important moments. Honestly, I was bored the fuck out of my life from the moment they start fighting Jun Wu with those divine gundams, and only start gaining interest again much later on when Hua Cheng dissipated into butterflies.

Not saying the story's bad. Just... It's not up to my expectation... Characters being inserted here and there with a bunch of background story, gags and a show of PDA being flaunted during crucial moments. And when Mei Nianqing started telling the truth about the Kingdom of Wuyong, that's just plain info dump right there, seriously...

CHARACTERS: 7/10

Interesting characters, but only a few bore a lasting impression on me. Other than the main characters, which are Xie Lian and Hua Cheng, the only side characters (minus Bai Wuxiang as the main villain) who left quite some impression on me were probably just Feng Xin and Mu Qing.

Pei Ming is okay, at least he is still memorable until the end, and his character improved, too.

He Xuan, after having been introduced with such extreme, after his arc is over, was easily forgotten just like that.

Mei Nianqing, is borderline Deus Ex-Machina with a huge chunk of info dump that could solve everything, then he stopped being useful for the rest of the story.

Shi Qingxuan... Honestly, he's almost annoying, too noisy. I don’t hate him (and I kind of like him initially), but the way his character was being handled and presented post-Black Water arc feels disappointingly lazy and he was just there to make the party more merry.

Xie Lian himself, as the protagonist, how do I say this... This is maybe due to the translator's writing style (not MXTX’s fault), but whenever he screams in all capslock, it feels too extreme and borderline OOC? Of course, the original novel written in hanzi couldn't have included capslock.

What's great about him, though, is that despite all he'd gone through, he can still retain a pure heart and could not be swayed to be evil, just as he himself said "Body in the abyss, heart in paradise".

Now Hua Cheng, he is overall a super interesting character and I personally love this type of male characters. But he seriously is way too OP, almost like the original Luo Binghe (Bing-ge) a.k.a. too ideal, too perfect, no flaws, always capable of easily finding a way out in every single peril. I only forgive him for being like this because he dissipated into butterflies at the end of the battle with Jun Wu, making me think "oh, finally he's actually not invincible".

Still, his devotion to Xie Lian is very well written, very well presented, and his "I am forever your most devoted believer" is just downright the most powerful line in the whole story.

Now I promised to talk about Qi Rong, yeah? I haven't the slightest idea why it is even necessary to have Qi Rong as the Night-touring Green Lantern. I mean, yes he is there to make up the number of the Four Great Calamities, but that was for the characters who live in that world. As the novel's reader, I don't see any particularly important roles there for Qi Rong other than being an annoying meme fodder despite his actually pretty-cool first foreshadowing and appearance? Even his issue with Lang Qianqiu does not seem to give that much impact on the overall story, it could've just passed simply being explained in several pages.

Though I'd say he's got the best character development compared to others. Instead of dying as some hateful villain, the way he ended up deciding to protect Guzi at the cost of his own life can already be expected from miles away, but still bittersweet and touching nonetheless - how this crazed, mental person could still love when being presented with such pure, innocent feelings to the point that he acknowledged Guzi as a his own son.

By the way, E Ming and Ruoye are cute, I take no criticism.

TECHNICAL ASPECTS: 8/10

I can't really describe this with words, but MXTX's overall writing technique has greatly improved since MDZS.

It feels more "solid" to read instead of scattered here and there.

The info distribution has improved (fewer info dump compared to before), the story's no longer switching between past and present all of a sudden.

Description of characters and environment are sufficient, the plot is progressing steadily.

Several issues I have with this aspect though, the Prologue being ten pages is just way too long, I don't think I need that much information being stuffed right to my face right from the beginning.

There are excessive use of "Turns out..." every single time an explanation is going to come.

"Xie Lian didn't know whether he should cry or laugh" is honestly has been used probably more than 50 times just in the last two books. Although I'm reading a translation, I'm pretty sure the original Chinese version is being repetitive with this phrase, as well, because the translators couldn't just whip up any other phrase from thin air and put it in someone else's novel.

Almost half of scene transition is always caused by some sudden, external disturbance like "All of a sudden they heard someone's coming", "All of a sudden X visits their room", etc.

OVERALL SCORE: 7.3/10

Worth to read, satisfying overall. The main pairing's love story is just so well written and sweet. As long as you can withstand the violence and gore, though. 😂

TGCF highlights perhaps one of the ugliest natures of mankind: Being nice to someone as long as they're beneficial, and immediately throwing them away once the benefit was no more.

Once that person does not seem to be beneficial anymore, everyone would leave them instantly, even turning on them and start spitting on them without even trying to understand the reason why said person "stopped being beneficial".

Both as a Crown Prince and a martial god, Xie Lian and the Crown Prince of Wuyong were praised, revered, worshipped by the citizens of Xianle and Wuyong respectively. Because they were always helping, always fulfilling the people's wishes. But how easily it was for those very same people to turn on Xie Lian and the Crown Prince of Wuyong when they encountered misfortunes, completely turning a blind eye to the laborious effort both characters have been putting to save them from annihilation, even if it was visible in broad daylight.

It is also worth to note another trait of mankind that this story underlines: To always find a scapegoat or blame others for one's own misfortune and failure - be it another human being, another group of people, the government, even the gods - after having taking their generosity for granted.

Which is why I think the true villain of the story is not Bai Wuxiang, but those citizens of the ancient Wuyong who were now nothing more than resentful spirits eternally burning within the lava of Tonglu Mountain - a well deserved punishment after what they did to their Crown Prince.

#Tian Guan Ci Fu #TGCF #Heaven Officials Blessing #HuaLian #Xie Lian #Hua Cheng #Review #Danmei #MXTX #Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

[meetthetank]

Cruciamen Chapter 11: A Touch of Honey

Rating: Mature Archive Warning: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Categories: F/M, Other Fandom: NieR: Automata (Video Game) Relationships: 2B/9S (NieR: Automata), A2/A4 (NieR: Automata) Characters: 2B (NieR: Automata), 9S (NieR: Automata), A2 (NieR: Automata), A4 (NieR: Automata), Emil (NieR: Automata), Kainé (Nier) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, genre typical violence, On the Run, Monster of the Week, 9S is a half demon, 2B and A2 are shapeshifter Dragons, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smut in the future, inaccurate depictions of medical procedures, Fantasy Biology, A2 is Nonbinary Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25104214/chapters/79358422

The art in the thick, leatherbound tome is unlike anything A2 has seen before. Great warriors, their mighty weapons, and the monsters they slew dance across the page and intermingle with the precisely placed text. They run their bandaged fingers over the linework and imagine the rough splinters of the carved woodblock. Each image is rendered with exquisite detail and transferred to the page with expert skill. The ink doesn’t even smear when they touch it.

The door to their sickroom swings open. A4 strides in, black curls bouncing with each step, carrying a basket of supplies and a plate of food. The dry beige stuff, “bread” and soft yellow stuff, “cheese” have been mostly replaced by fresh fruits, but there’s still small pieces of both hidden underneath. The nun regards A2 with a bright smile that makes her emerald eyes shine. For the past three days she’s greeted them this way, always the same smile, the same twinkle in her eyes. It’s weird, but A2 doesn’t mind.

“I didn’t take you for a scholar,” she says, placing her basket down and coming to their bedside. “Oh, no offense.” A4 scans the page open on A2’s lap, then sighs wistfully. “I always love this story. The Sword Saint is one of my favorite heroes. What about you?”

A2 blinks, their expression neutral. “I can’t read it. I just think the pictures are cool.”

“Oh.” The nun turns her head and makes a strange coughing noise. When she turns back her face is red, making the smattering of freckles across her cheeks stand out.

“What?”

“Nothing!” A4 yelps. “Just ah-... Dry throat is all.”

“Okay…” A2 mutters.

“What’s your favorite picture then?” A4 asks, eager to change the subject.

Their expression lightens a bit. “The weapons.”

“Oh, really?”

A2 nods. “Yeah. Never seen some of these before. They look cool.” Their fingers trace across an image of a wicked looking serrated blade. “Back home, the elders said that weapons told stories. I never believed it as a cub, weapons couldn’t talk.”

“Interesting,” A4 muses. She looks at them, lying in bed, clearly bored out of their skull. Their leg bounces under the covers, their eyes dart around only to settle on her face for a few moments, then find something else to be interested in. The book is long forgotten, and A4 guesses that sitting here telling stories would be as ineffective as trying to get them to change their bandages regularly. Then,  suddenly claps her hands together.“I have an idea!”

They close the book and tilt their head to the side. “Huh?”

“I bet you’re tired of walking around the infirmary. I could take you around some of the other buildings, if you’d like.”

A2 grumbles to themself. Though they feel better after walking with A4, they despise being led around like a lost cub. Not even the prospect of new scenery will change their attitude.

“There’s lots of sculptures and art, and even relic weapons I could show you,” she says with a coy smile.

That… gets their attention. “... When are we going?”

“Whenever you’re ready, I think.” 

A4 offers her hand out to A2 to help them out of bed. They wrap their bandaged fingers around hers and allow themself to be pulled up. Though the sharp pains and aches that ravaged their body have dulled, they still wince and hiss under their breath as they stand. Parts of their skin, particularly in their shoulders, elbows, lower back, and legs, feel too tight, as if their bones are a tanning rack. A4 places a worried hand on their shoulder. They give a dismissive wave but don’t reject the touch. 

“I’m fine,” A2 says, forcing themself to stand as tall as they can. “Just a bit stiff.”

The nun sticks by their side as they leave the infirmary. A2 grumbles that they’re not about to fall over, but A4 remains adamant that she’s here in case they need some support. They glance around at the other rooms that happen to have the doors open. There aren’t many other patients housed here; A2 counts at least three or four patients and one other nun. This place must not get many visitors, or much outside aid for that matter.

The sun blinds them temporarily as they step onto the worn path that leads from the infirmary to the rest of the convent’s grounds. Straight ahead is an old stone chapel, decorated with symbols and iconography A2 recognizes from the book they were reading. Immediately left of that is a building similar in structure to the infirmary from which other nuns come in and out. The scents of unfamiliar foods drifts out of the open windows, and A4 giggles when A2 stares at the building as they pass.

As they approach the living quarters and the chapel, A2 notices a distinct change in the atmosphere around them. There’s an energy in the air that sends a chill up their spine, something unseen that makes the downy feathers beneath their hair prick up. 

A4, noticing their tension, puts a hand on their shoulder.

“What is that?” they ask, stormy eyes darting around in search of a threat. “Something’s weird here.”

“It’s the blessed grounds,” A4 explains. “The area surrounding the chapel and our dormitory have been consecrated to ward against demons and other creatures.” 

A2 nods along, not understanding at all. At least this place has some kind of protection. The only thing preventing an invasion is The Bog to the north and dense woods to the south. A fence or stones would be preferable, but a magical barrier will do, they suppose.

A4 brings them to the chapel first. She stops in front of the heavy wooden doors with A2 by her side and clasps her hands together in front of her chest. Though she mutters a prayer in a language A2 does not recognize, they can tell the words are full of reverence. She bows her head, makes motions across her body with her hands, then leans forward as far as possible in an exaggerated bow. A2 stands and stares, unsure if they should be following along or not. They fold their hands clumsily, only for A4 to giggle at them once again. Heat floods their face and they cross their arms over their chest with an indignant huff. 

She pushes the doors open much more easily than A2 thought she would. Cool air laden with fragrant incense rushes out and rustles their hair. There’s barely any light inside, only the sun’s rays and a few candles illuminate the interior of the old building, but it’s enough for the colorful glass windows to shine in brilliant greens, reds, and blues. They follow A4 with their head on a swivel, trying in vain to take in everything around them. Each window has an image inside it of different colored glass, giving the depictions of strange beings and holy figures an otherworldly quality. In between each window are statues depicting all manner of weird and awe-inspiring creatures. There are many beings that seem to defy the laws of nature, each one brandishing instruments of war such as swords, spears, and great shields. One winged creature with a long, featureless face that ends in a point unnerves A2. Despite it having no eyes, it seems to stare at them. 

“What are these…” A2 murmurs, finding themself staying close to A4.

“Angels,” she explains, slowing her pace to match A2’s

They shiver. “I didn’t think they would look so…” So much like demons? They don’t dare say that aloud. “... Monstrous.”

A4 giggles. “Angels and other heavenly bodies aren’t from this world.”

“Oh.” They scuff their shoes against the stone floor, feeling a little silly. Of course they wouldn’t be from this world. “Where are they from? Has anyone seen an angel before?” 

They don’t mean to be rude, they’re only curious, but the frown that sours A4’s soft features makes them rethink asking questions like that again.

“We call their world Paradise,” she says, forcing her expression to be neutral again. “There are a number of thinkers that theorize that it’s somewhere high above the clouds or among the stars. The few times we have seen angels, they’ve descended from the sky.” She sighs and thumbs the fabric of her dress. “It’s... been a long time since anyone has seen an angel. The last recorded sighting was during the time of the Hellwalker, thousands of years ago.”

A2 hums and searches for anything to change the subject. A statue close to the small altar catches their attention. An armored human, or something that used to be human, holds out his arms as an angelic warrior erupts from his split chest. Though graphic and morbid (the scene sends chills down A2’s spine), none of the more gruesome details are rendered in the stone. Even the human with his chest agape seems to be enraptured by the holy warrior emerging from his decimated body.

“Wh-” 

They stop short of asking about the sculpture, but ever observant, A4’s head whips around to face them. She looks from their face to the statue and back again, easily piecing together the question A2 was about to ask.

“This was Saint Agustus, an Ascended,” she explains. “Exceptional people of the Faith are sometimes chosen by the Bishops to give up their body to an angel. They become holy vessels of divine will.”

A2 only nods along, watching as A4 clutches a charm that dangles from their prayer bead necklace. They can’t make out the shape, but it looks like a similar design to what the statue of Saint Augustus has tied to his belt. Before A4 can catch them staring they avert their eyes, making sure not to linger on anything for too long. The last thing they want to do is make this sweet nun feel like she has to educate them on every aspect of the Faith.

“The weapons look cool,” they say in a desperate attempt to avoid any prying religious based questions.

It seems to work, as A4 smiles. “They are, but the real ones are even cooler.” For the first time since coming into the chapel, she looks genuinely excited. It’s infectious; A2 can’t stop themself from grinning as well. “Would you like to see some?”

All A2 has to do is nod once for A4 to grab their hand and lead them through the chapel and down a stairwell. A few other nuns scowl at her but it doesn’t seem to bother A4 in the slightest; in fact she seems to smile wider once she does notice. That little act of mischief from the woman A2 thought was a good and pious girl makes her smirk, just a bit.

Another set of oaken doors separate the basement of the chapel, used for storing unused furniture and holiday paraphernalia, from the Order’s armory. The array and variety of weapons is impressive enough, but the decoration and detail on their ornaments is dazzling. Each sword, spear, axe, mace, and bow is embellished with holy symbols, geometric designs, and mosaics of brilliant gems and stones. A massive sword in a glass case catches A2’s eye. Its intricate lattice work and inlaid jewels outline the polished and gilded blade. It’s ostentatious and far too gaudy for their tastes, but A2 can’t deny that it’s impressive.

“That’s Teresa’s Ecstasy,” A4 explains. “Or, a replica of it.”

“Cool…” A2 says, staring at the sword with wide, awestruck eyes.

A4 goes around and gives a little lesson on each weapon or replica and who used it. Teresa’s Ecstasy might be the largest and shiniest, but the brutal headsman axes wielded by Holy Executioners would be their choice out of the lot, hypothetically. There’s a pair of swords that look strangely familiar to A2, two serrated black iron swords devoid of the elaborate decorations or the others. A4 explains them to be the favored weapons of someone known as the Sword Saint.

“This is what I take into battle,” A4 says and takes what A2 thought to be a censer off of a rack, but it is adorned with the wicked blades and spikes of a flail. “I burn a sacred herb inside that emits a smoke that suffocates demons.”

She demonstrates her skills with several wide sweeps and a downward strike to finish. A2 steps back to give her room to swing the flail. It almost looks like a dance and it astounds them that A4 doesn’t lose control of the weapon and smack herself in the face with it. It's enchanting in a way they didn’t expect, and they find themself watching her with enough intensity that when A4 catches them staring, her face flushes red and she falters, allowing the golden chain to catch on her arm. She sputters a half explanation, half apology as she hangs the thurible back on its rack. 

A4 clears her throat. “S-so. Which one would you pick?”

They can’t help but smile. Her question carries the same excited innocence that a child has when asking a friend what their favorite lizard is. A2 scans the racks and shelves filled with weapons, relics, and replicas. Most of these are far too flashy or strange for them to latch onto, but there is a rack of simple wooden weapons. At first they mistake them for harmless training weapons, but one catches their eye. They pick up a heavy dark oak club with spikes crudely hammered into the rounded end. It’s hefty, top-heavy, yet well balanced and cruel. They give it a practice swing, then a more powerful one and smirk at the simple brutality of the spiked club.

“This one. If I didn’t have my sword, of course.”

She giggles. “I thought you might pick the Club of Saint Gertrude.”

A2 decides that Saint Gertrude had good taste. They set the club back in its place with much more reverence than before. 

The pair don’t stay down in the armory for very long. An older nun whom A4 refers to as Sister Beatrice (who also lingers behind them as they leave) scolds them for playing around with holy relics. A4 tries to defend herself but quickly absconds with A2 in tow before the old woman could get too angry. As they exit the chapel and A2 has to walk past the statues and windows once more, they can’t shake a certain observation of the convent’s art and iconography that sticks in their mind. Everything here, despite being holy and images of purity, is very... sexual. Even the people or demons being skewered or torn apart have expressions of pure ecstasy and pleasure. They shove the thought away as they and A4 exit the chapel and the fresh air fills their lungs.

Along with the calming scents of grass and the woods, something else catches A2’s attention. A savory smell, like searing meat but not as sharp or oily, drifts from the building A4 had identified as the dormitory. It’s a wholly unknown scent to them, but it makes their mouth water nonetheless. Thankfully that building is A4’s next destination. 

Since there’s no ritual she needs to perform for entering the living quarters, A4 walks right through the much less ornate wooden door, holding it open for A2. The entryway is sparsely decorated: only wide, featureless windows that let in natural light and potted plants of various kinds sit among neatly lined pairs of boots. Other belongings and clothes sit on small tables and vanities near the door: several woven black shawls, prayer beads, and simple leather satchels. It’s hard to tell just how many nuns live here, but A2 figures at least twenty based on how many pairs of boots they can see. 

A4 leads them through the halls of the dormitory, which is relatively uninteresting aside from the different paintings of what A2 assumes to be saints that adorn the walls every so often. The smell grows stronger and stronger until they reach a large, open kitchen and dining area. Well-used pots and pans hang from the rafters, a pot of water boils on an oven with a small cookfire crackling inside, and plates of breads and cheeses sit on the center table, ready for lunch time. 

The young nun bustles back and forth, checking on the pot of something she calls “pasta” that boils on the stove while A2 idly examines the different foods lying about. Some of them they recognize, like cloves of garlic, from the witch’s house. Others they have to sneak a bite of to decide whether or not they like it. Most of the powders and dried plants are far too strong, and it takes all of their self control not to vomit after biting into a thin stick of… something.

A2 finally comes to the loaves of bread that have a white decoration on top of them arranged neatly on a tray. While A4 fusses with organizing some utensils and complaining about how messy one of the other nuns is, A2 picks up a small loaf. It’s much softer than they expected, and denser. It must be a different kind than the ones A4 brings them. It crumbles easily when they roll a piece between their fingers. The white decoration turns to a sticky liquid when they touch it. Cautiously, they take a bite.

It only takes two bites for A2 to eat the whole loaf. 

Whatever this is has to be the sweetest, most amazing thing A2 has ever put in their mouth. It reminds them vaguely of honey, a rare treat back home, but with so much more added to it. They taste a bit of fruit and some of the spices they had sampled in there as well. Suddenly they feel like they’ve been missing out on so much of the world, a feeling that causes tears to well up in their eyes. 

A4’s laughter snaps them out of their religious experience. They try to wipe their eyes as nonchalantly as possible, but the nun sees right through their ruse.

“I never thought anyone would react like that to my baking,” she says, smiling from ear to ear.

“Y-...” A2 looks at her with wide eyes, “You made that?”

“Yes,” she giggles. “It was one of the first things I learned to bake. It’s sweet bread.”

A2 thinks they might like this place after all. They reach for a second loaf only for A4 to smack their hand.

“Hey! Save some for the rest of us!” she scolds them, but the smile plastered across her face lets them know there’s no malice at all. A4 leans in close to A2 and drops her voice to a whisper, “If you cooperate with your treatments and behave yourself I can sneak you some.”

Her excitement is infectious. A pleasant warmth rushes through A2’s body as they laugh with her. “Okay, deal.”

...When was the last time they felt like this?

They don’t linger in the kitchen for very long. A4 tugs them along by the hand once again, eager to have A2 meet her mentor at the convent (or to get them away from the food). She says this is the final stop of their tour, which comes as a secret relief to A2. Their legs and arms are starting to ache and despite eating an entire loaf of sweet bread they want to lie in bed for a few hours. Even walking through the dormitory halls takes the wind out of them. They try to hide it as best they can, but A4 gives them a concerned look when she hears them wheeze.

The final stop turns out to be the dormitory’s infirmary. Why the nuns have their own separate medical wing confuses A2, but the group seems eager to keep outsiders away, considering all the strange looks A2 has been on the receiving end. The room is devoid of people aside from two older women. One wears the same plain black dress and white headscarf that the other nuns wear. She hunches over a much more decrepit woman, dressed in a black robe with an intricate geometric pattern on the front, denoting a higher rank, and tends to a wound on her face. As A2 walks closer, they can smell a harsh potion similar to what A4 has been giving them to clean their sores. 

“Sister Margaret!” A4 calls and waves, then bows to the older old woman. “Good afternoon, Mother Superior.”

“Good afternoon, sister,” both women answer in unison.

A2 gives a shaky wave, standing behind A4 as if this tiny woman would protect them from awkward social encounters. 

“Is this the girl we rescued from the Bog?” Sister Margaret asks, only sparing a glance at A2 before turning back to the wounds on Mother Superior’s face.

They’re about to chime in with their usual response to that assumption, but their words catch in their throat as Mother Superior turns to face them, allowing A2 to see the full extent of her disfigurement. 

Her eyes are gone. The only thing that remains are her eyelids, sewn shut, and two circles of thick scar tissue over them. Sister Margaret gently dabs a sharp-smelling cream over the wounds. 

“Speak, child,” Mother Superior says, her voice severe but worn with age. “Does my penance frighten you?”

“P-...” A2 stammers, their aloof personality vanishing in an instant, “Penance?”

“Mother please.” Sister Margaret playfully taps her elder on the shoulder. “Don’t scare the poor girl.”

A4, Sister Margaret, and Mother Superior chat while Maragret finishes up with her treatments. The three women all seem to get along, from A2’s perspective, but A4 and Margaret seem far closer. A2 lingers on the edge of the group, waiting for and dreading when attention turns back to them. All the while, they can’t stop looking at Mother Superior and her wounds. The word “penance” echoes in their head over and over and over. They see an iron mask sitting beside the matriarch and swallow a lump forming in their throat.

It isn’t long before Mother Superior stands to leave. She waves her goodbyes, A4 and Sister Margaret bow in return, and the old woman hobbles out of the infirmary, leaning on a wooden cane for support and navigation. 

As soon as Mother Superior exits the room, Sister Margaret claps her hands together and approaches A2. “Now! Let's take a look at you…”

This woman has no sense of personal space, A2 thinks. She pulls at their lips to check their teeth, runs her wrinkled hands over their scales and bandages, digs through their hair like she’s looking for ticks, and holds their eyelids open to examine them. They let out a low, annoyed hiss, but allow the old nun to pick them apart like an experiment.

“Looks like you’re doing a good job so far, 4!” Sister Margaret praises. A4 beams with pride. “Keep up with fresh fruit as her main diet, change the bandages daily or more if needed. How are you feeling? Be honest, girl.”

“Uh- I’m not…” They stop, unsure if correcting Sister Margaret about their gender would cause problems. “I’m... still sore. Get tired easily. Get sick if I eat too much.”

Sister Margaret and A4 nod in exactly the same way. “Well,” Margaret begins, “Rest, walks, and a proper diet should put your humors back in check. Don’t keep your condition a secret, there’s no room for the sin of pride in these walls.”

A2 nods, then suddenly chokes on their own spit as Margaret grabs at their upper arm and squeezes their bicep. 

“Hooo boy!” she hoots, giving their arm another squeeze, seemingly pleased by how hard the muscle is. “She’s something alright!” Margaret turns to A4, whose face already begins to flush red. “I’ll say this, if she cleaned up, she’d be a snack and a half!”

She laughs at the red faced A4, while A2 stands there with the blank stare of a confused cub.

#nier automata #nier #nier automata fanfiction #A2 #fantasy au #fanfiction #tank in the real

[skullhaver]

It's 2021, and I'm watching Buffy for the first time.

The Virgil on my Buffy journey is my long-distance girlfriend, who has loved the show for years. We just finished season 4, and I wanted to write about my favorite episodes so far. I suspect some of my faves are beloved by most fans, but others are weird, personal picks. Buffy fandom, please don't come for me.

I thought this post would be short but I was wrong.

Hono(u)rable Mentions: "Band Candy" S3E6 and "Halloween" S2E6

Both these episodes have fun premises where the Scoobies run around Sunnydale after it was upended by zany, chaotic dark forces. "Band Candy" is fun for devil-may-care teen Giles. "Halloween" is fun for 18th-century-ditz Buffy. These are both very good, and are the sorts of episode I can imagine happily rewatching in the future. I just have more to pontificate upon for the other episodes on this list.

10. "Ted" S2E11

I can’t say I enjoyed this episode, but it did take me for a wild ride. Probably nobody else has strong feelings about this weird story where Buffy's mom dates a stereotypical cheesy family man, who turns out to be a controlling abuser, who turns out to be a robot. I remember shouting at the screen, "Did Buffy just kill a human man?? Is it okay in the moral logic of this show for Buffy to kill a human if he's a direct physical threat to her??" I knew Buffy would have deeper stories than the monster of the week formula we'd seen so far, but this early in season 2, I had no idea when or how that would happen. This was the episode that finally taught me that Buffy is largely not interested in moral ambiguity, or in exploring what it means to be good or bad. Except for season-defining exceptions like Faith and Angel, evil characters are simplistically, essentially evil. But it was wild to believe for a moment that Buffy murdered her mom's abusive boyfriend and would have to live with the consequences.

9. "Helpless" S3E12

When Buffy tries to be genuinely scary, it succeeds with aplomb. The premise of this episode is dumb and contrived ("Giles has to remove Buffy's powers without her knowledge for a seeeecret test by the Watcher's Council") but the chase and fight in this episode are some of the most tense and spooky scenes of the whole series so far. Buffy's vulnerability makes the stakes feel real in a way few other episodes manage. And Buffy's victory is all the more satisfying because she can't punch her way out of this problem, she has to be smart and creative. The fridge horror, of course, is that Giles would endanger her like this in the first place, but that gets sorted out over the emotional arc of the next few episodes.

8. "I Only Have Eyes For You." S2E19

Another spooky episode, this one a classic ghost story of forbidden love ending in murder - but with the twist that the ghosts possess people's bodies to have them reenact their final moments. I love stories about breaking a doomed-to-repeat cycle. I love weird shit like the snakes manifesting in the cafeteria. And I really loved the choice to have Buffy and Angel come to understand their feelings about their own relationship by embodying these ghosts - especially how they embodied different genders than their own to better fit the "roles" of the haunting story, thus subverting the expected pattern. I found this episode clever, poignant, and effective.

7. "Who Are You?" S4E16

"Faith and Buffy switch bodies" is a wild premise, but the real joy of "Who Are You?" is watching Sarah Michelle Geller being an extremely talented actress for 45 minutes, portraying a totally different character. Watching Faith confronted by kindness and love from Buffy's mom, Riley, and her friends, then getting launched into an existential crisis over it is so great. Also, I just dig a good church fight.

6. "Hush" S4E10

As stated above, love an episode that reminds me that these people are talented actors! Featuring demons that render all of Sunnydale unable to talk, we get to watch great physical comedy right next to tense, silent fight scenes. The visual creepiness of the Gentleman and their straight-jacketed weird little helpers is hard to beat. "Hush" is such a clever episode that it ascends monster of the week status to become almost Twilight Zone-esque. Also, for the first time, Buffy sees Riley doing his Initiative thing, and Riley sees Buffy being the Slayer, but they can't talk about it?? That's good shit.

5. "The Wish" S3E9

Both "Something Blue" and "The Wish" feel like the writers decided to use fanfic premises on their own show... so obviously I like them a lot. But getting to watch a dark timeline AU with interesting world-building and attention to detail, a hilarious and horrifying Cordelia POV, AND a smirking kinky vampire Willow? Hello?? And the fact that the Wishverse comes up again in "Doppelgänger" (another truly fun episode) only improves my opinion. I imagine this is the kind of episode fans simply love coming back to.

4. "Restless" S4E22

This David Lynch-ass dream sequence was a weird choice for a season finale, but an extremely ambitious and cool episode. I should say up front that I love David Lynch-ass dream shit. There were creative and well-executed scene transitions as characters moved seamlessly from one dream room into another. Several memorably neat shots - Willow running between endless curtains as she tries to get onstage, Buffy alone in a vast desert with a weirdly high camera angle. And I got myself all excited thinking that the First Slayer would maybe become a different kind of antagonist - maybe not even fully revealed in this episode, or maybe an Id-like aspect of Buffy herself. But I forgot Whedon gonna Whedon, so the First Slayer had to be someone Buffy could punch in the end. And the First Slayer is sadly yet another primitive-themed, emotionally-stunted character of color for this show. Most of her lines in this episode are literally voiced by a white woman speaking for her, and of all the dumb quips to make, Buffy had a line about her hair being unprofessional? Also, I'm a lesbian, so the fact that the most explicit act of intimacy between Willow and Tara this show has allowed us to see occurs in Xander's horny dream sequence... it’s unforgivable, Joss. This episode was one of my favorites ever, deeply marred by some bad writing choices.

3. "Lovers Walk" S3E8

Spike, perhaps the best non-Willow character in this show, is back in Sunnydale, a hilariously heartbroken mess of a man, hell-bent on getting his former girlfriend Drusilla back. (Drusilla left him for a fungus demon.) So Spike breaks into a magic shop to get ingredients for a love spell, where he runs into Willow, who is getting ingredients for a de-lusting spell, because she is worried she and Xander will be too thirsty to behave appropriately in public with their actual partners, Oz and Cordelia. This is a hilarious moment just to exist. This is all the episode needed to do to satisfy me. But the fact that Spike then kidnaps Willow, and it ends with tragic stakes of everyone's relationships coming apart, not to mention me genuinely thinking Cordelia was dead for a minute there - wow. Chef’s kiss. The episode is balanced shockingly well between Spike being an ominous villain, and being the sort of lovable semi-evil (more gremlin-like) side character he'll become in season 4. What a wild ride.

2. "Graduation Day" S3E21-22

I'm counting this two part season finale as one because it's my list and I'll do what I want. "Graduation Day" feels like a quintessential Buffy episode executed to perfection. It has Buffy reaffirming her position as a moral heroine, sacrificing her own blood to save Angel's life even when she thought she had to kill Faith to save him. It has Buffy and Faith (or Buffy/Faith, as I prefer to think of them) getting to square off in a dramatic, tough fight. It has a lot of Mayor Wilkins, a character I truly adore for some reason. Nothing like a public administrator who plays mini golf in his office, wants you to chew with your mouth closed, and will kill a graduating class of high schoolers to gain immortality. The catharsis of the whole school getting to fight back against evil, instead of just Buffy against the world - a real joy. This episode misses the top spot for two reasons. "A special vampire poison and the only cure is the blood of a Slayer" is too contrived for me to let slide, and also I had to see Cordelia and Wesley kiss.

1. "Becoming" S2E21-22

Buffy’s season finales really do have good stories and satisfying payoff. First off, Buffy starts this episode by punching a cop and fleeing from the law. Later, Spike also punches a cop. A.k.a., Buffy said blue lives don't matter. Second - I haven't gotten a chance to comment on this yet, but all throughout season 2, evil Angel is such a joy to watch. As regular Angel, David Boreanaz makes exactly one face ("I am a kicked, angsty puppy") and bless his heart, it gets so tiresome. As evil Angel, he is so expressive, dynamic and terrifyingly creative in his badness. And I love his weird threesome energy with Spike and Drusilla. But also, it's so hard to watch Buffy suffer as she deals with her evil boyfriend doing evil things. Her ultimate choice in this episode, to kill Angel even as Willow's spell restores his soul, gave me some real big feels! Also, this episode marks the first moment of Willow doing big, plot-shifting magic on her own, solidifying her transformation from computer nerd to witch! 

Also, shout-out to the many good smaller moments in this episode: Spike making awkward small talk with Buffy's mom, Buffy constantly dunking on Principle Snyder, and Giles being tortured by visions of Miss Calendar (RIP Miss Calendar, I was your biggest fan.)

"Becoming" is an excellent season finale and the kind of Buffy episode I imagine I will want to re-watch in the future just for nostalgia's sake.

#buffy the vampire slayer #guess i will tag this and just engage in pvp if it happens #buffy fandom in 2021 i don't know you but please be nice #this was fun to write #i guess i do like this show!

[mousehole5000]

more tgcf chapters 143-173 lets goooooo

PEI MING BOO HISS except actually okay he’s mostly funny i think but still boo hiss

“hey who’s this guy who’s really pissed at you?” “oh thats my sword. i broke it.” alright then!

i think i need to go back and reread the banyue pass arc bc im still confused as to whats going on with banyue and pei su

“Banyue dropped from the sky with two pots raised. Without a word, she plummeted with the mouths of the pots facing down, trapping and detaining the shocked Ming’guang and the roaring Ke Mo within.” - THATS MY GIRL

“It must be known that, to heavenly officials, it certainly was more than natural for kingdoms of the mortal realm to fight and annihilate one another; the acts of these plays progressing on endlessly. But when it came their own turn, it was often hard to let things go. If one must stand in the same court as the one who annihilated their own kingdom, and that man cavorted in the heavens, exceedingly flashy, then it must be vexing.” - hmmmm!!

“I’ve spoken too many words in this lifetime. What are you referring to?” - okay to be fair thats a mood

okay its nice to get some pei ming backstory and its funny that he and xie lian are bonding but also still whenever pei ming interacts with a female character my hackles rise like a cat lol

“Xie Lian watched as Banyue thought really hard before cheerfully pulling out a few long, wine-red scorpion-snakes, and putting them into the bubbling pot.” - THATS MY GIRL

“Although “smell” was something colourless and formless, the instant Banyue removed the pot cover, it was as if some mysterious physical object had twisted all the air around the mouth of that pot. The group stared at the sight within the pot for a long time. Their pupils reflected an endless, bottomless darkness; like it could pull them into the abyss. No words could describe the sentiment expressed within their eyes. A moment later, Xie Lian patted Banyue’s shoulder and gave a thumbs-up.” - like father-figure like daughter-figure. amazing.

“However, what if one day mortals discovered something completely new that ran faster than horses? Then, when this new invention overtook horses, worshippers of this heavenly official who controlled horses would inevitably decrease. Such heavenly officials, flashing by like shooting stars, made up the majority of the heavens.” - obsessed with this, genuinely. life and change. worship and its purpose. my religious studies diploma on my wall is screaming at me rn. ALSO i am once again thinking about celebrities

“...” It was only then that Pei Ming seemed to notice, and started to contemplate this question. A moment later, he answered, “A habit. In a dark, creepy place like this, isn’t it normal to hold women in your arms, to comfort them and calm their fears?” “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t scared,” Banyue said.” - BANYUE I LOVE YOU. I MISSED YOU SO MUCH. god this takes me back to every college party i ever went to

LING WEN BACKSTORY????? shoeseller chosen for godhood bc she wrote a political essay and got arrested...... and now she’s face to face with the official who appointed her..... do go on.....

“Ling Wen laughed out loud, seeming to be enraged, and her voice dropped. “Very well! You said I couldn’t reach that high. Then, might I ask you: had the prominence of the Palace of Jing Wen at its peak ever reached even the knees of my Palace of Ling Wen??” - GET HIM!!!! BOO HISS JING WEN

“Compared to you, I’m not that bad,” Ling Wen said. “You’d personally order me to stay in the Palace of Jing Wen until midnight, then turn around and say I shamelessly hang around ‘til late to harass you. Words murder without form; I was much nicer responding with blatant violence.” - ling wen im love you..... also this bit... feels Real

BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN BLOOD RAIN!! FLOWER PETALS TRANSFORMATION!!! see hua cheng? look as how cool it can be when you leave the story for a little while!! bc then you get to return and make an entrance!!

“Not only can you bring forth bloody rain, you can also make flowers shower. I didn’t know that. How fun!” - cute!! and in that moment we were all xie lian

“Everyone was stunned by his deed, and Ling Wen arduously gave him a thumbs-up. ”Ol’ Pei, what a man!” Pei Ming gritted his teeth. “WELCOME!” - aww three two tumors buddies!!

okay yin yu is here and xie lian did the equivalent of asking someone when the baby is due only to find out theyre not pregnant at all. then rong guang taunts yin yu and no one says anything. i do love the amount of awkward moments in this book tbh sometimes there are no words.

“All around was sand and mud crushing at him, exceedingly suffocating. The sand and mud was also moving endlessly; the feeling was like he was swallowed into the stomach of a giant monster, and that monster had also eaten a bunch of other things besides him, tumbling everything in its stomach, trying to digest” - ooooh creepy!!! the red string thing... is cute.... also xie lian being able to see hua cheng’s butterfly vision by looking directly into his eye is kinda cool. and obviously homoerotic.

“Are lower-ranked heavenly officials below other people?” Quan Yizhen asked. “No,” Yin Yu replied. Were they not? It was obvious that he himself didn’t believe in his own words, and Quan Yizhen also noticed. A good while later, he said bluntly, “I don’t like it here.” Yin Yu said nothing.” - im having emotions. and then yin yu also saying he doesnt like it there either.... also idk how this scene is going to play out but as much as im enjoying quan yizhen being an icon i can also possibly see how yin yu could eventually get to the point of “i am tired of being nice. i do just want to go apeshit” even if he really cares about qyz. it happens </3

“Indeed,” Hua Cheng said. “Half a year later when Quan Yizhen actually ascends, he won’t find it so funny anymore.” “Can we watch that part too?” Xie Lian asked. “We can. Hold on,” Hua Cheng replied.” - quan yizhen king of taking things literally. also why did this turn into hualian having a movie night

jian yu seems like the kind of asshole who would purposely give someone regular soda when they specifically asked for diet soda. god yin yu is really having a bad day i really feel for him in the whole situation with the brocade immortal

awww okay at least jian yu tried to take responsibility. im still mad at him tho that was objectively a terrible idea. god this whole situation sucked :(

“Rocks and earth crushed at them from all around, forcing their bodies to press tightly against one another, their faces brushing, their ears warm. Although it wasn’t the right time, a thought flashed through Xie Lian’s mind: “‘To die buried together’ doesn’t feel so bad.” - okay... im kind of emotional.... gay people....

okay obviously these murals and the prince of wuyong have some connection (im guessing pretty direct) to xie lian and are important but everytime they start analyzing one i feel like im back in art history class fhadskfhskjdhf not that thats a bad thing!! i liked art history a lot tbh

“Don’t worry, they’re not human,” Hua Cheng said. “It’s precisely because they’re not human that we have to worry, alright….” Xie Lian thought.” - goth ghost bf problems

xie lian: well, there is one person i trust more than anyone else, someone who’s first in my mind hua cheng, oblivious: oh :/ xie lian, also oblivious: what? hua cheng: you shouldnt trust so easily its dangerous xie lian: oh. haha. yeah. well. wanna,,, know who it is? hua cheng: its :) fine :) it :) doesnt :) matter :) but of course you can tell me if you want to gege xie lian, internally: well now ive made it weird hua cheng, 5 minutes later: actually i need you to tell me. right now. its totally for your security me: gay people smh

“As they suspected, he had been captured by Qi Rong. Although no one was bound by ropes, there were balls of greasily green ghost fires hovering over every one of their heads.” - completely off track but anybody else remember the great green globs of greasy grimy gopher guts song

“Could there actually come a day when Qi Rong was embarrassed that someone might see the manner in which he ate? Before Xuan Ji entered, she put Guzi down. Guzi, ta-ta-ta, ran in, rushing straight to Qi Rong’s side. But when he saw him, he pointed his finger. He cried, “Dad is eating bad things in secret again!” “I’m not!” Qi Rong retaliated.” SCREAM IS QI RONG LEARNING THE POWER OF LOVE NOOOO also god that poor man whose body he has im starting to doubt if he’ll ever be free jimmy novak flashbacks

everytime we get another ghost king power somewhere someone should be writing hua cheng the cyborg bf in a high tech futuristic au i think thats the only other potential setting that could truly capture this wild ride

“In truth, throughout history, there was no man in the world who didn’t love bragging. A breeze could blow the handkerchief of a brothel girl into a man’s hand, and he would turn around and say the most beautiful of renowned escorts had fallen in love with him; holding shoes and wiping benches for the emperor’s mistress’s uncle’s grandson’s cousin’s mistress would for sure become him being an important administrator at the residence of royal relatives, raising his status. Thus, men who didn’t brag were a rare species.” - SCREAM this is going in my favorite tgcf quotes folder god... mxtx come here let me shake your hand

read the story of rain master yushi huang’s ascension. why am i crying. also this bit im crying again me with my stuffed animals “Thus, while Yushi Huang was cultivating at the Temple of Yulong, every time when she went to seek water and passed that door, she would rub the head of that ox. The door knocker soaked in her essence of life, and when the Rain Master ascended, the ox ascended with her.”

okay thats enough for now i have 7 more chapters to book 4!!! woo!!!

#tgcf liveblog #bedtime now but im excited to be moving on #mouse mumbles

[histoireettralala]

Joachim Murat: his youth in Quercy.

His steps often joined those of Napoleon. Born 250 years ago in Labastide, Marshal of France, the king of Naples remained, all his life, attached to his native land. His native village now bears his name: Labastide-Murat.

Published on August 29, 17 at 16:05, in ActuLot

Joachim Murat en uniforme de sous-lieutenant au 12e Régiment de Chasseurs en 1792 (Age 25), by Jean-Baptiste Paulin Guérin, 1835

His name will later be inscribed on the Arc de Triomphe de l'Etoile. On April 5, 1791, three young people from Quercy (Murat, Bessieres and Ambert), appointed by the Lot Directory to be part of the King's constitutional guard, whose creation has just been voted by the Legislative Assembly, take the road to Paris. Coming from a family of small social status, Murat will reach the highest military glory thanks to the Republican wars and the prestigious imperial epic.

He was born on a causse with unexplored abysses

Joachim Murat was born on March 25, 1767, at La Bastide-Fortunière, a village in the Causse de Gramat. This physical environment has a certain connection with the future King of Naples' life and character. “La Bastide, a small village on the high plateau, looks like a fortress commanding the country. This majestic appearance amidst the drought, the almost desolation of the limestone soil which unexplored abysses hollow out in some places is the very image of Murat's life, a life full of contrasts where the good and the worst intertwine, where the peak honors and glory are next to disasters, mentions Marcel Dupont in his work on Murat. The sometimes violent wind is still a striking image of the marshal's mind, always filled with clouds and where hopes, vast projects, fury and annihilation collide day and night. Here is summarized in a few strokes, the prodigious and fatal destiny of this horseman who would have no equal to descend like a windstorm on the enemy troops.

His mother Jeanne's favorite child

Yet he seemed destined for a peaceful existence. Murat comes from a family that has lived in the town for more than three centuries. They are hard-working peasants, exploiting poor soil in harsh winters. How could a king arise from this modest environment more conducive to the development of country virtues than to warlike exploits?

This required the ardor of his youth, which will never leave him, but also the revolutionary upheaval. His father exploited the lands of "a few enlightened minds" in the village. Not being the owner, he is the manager, receiving earnings proportional to the crops. These are certainly satisfactory because the couple have a large house in the center of the town. This is the mother’s domain. The ground floor has been converted into an inn and the floor is divided between the family apartment and a few rooms for passing guests. This energetic woman who runs the inn is a caring mother. The good Jeanne Loubières, whom he will adore all his life, in fact, makes of the youngest of her eleven children, her favorite. By her constant presence, her desire to provide Joachim with an education, that goes beyond that of his environment, she will shape this son to the point that he will never forget his childhood.

With his curly hair and cheerful face, he's a rowdy kid, sometimes a brawler, as it should be to be respected in this country where endurance is proof of character. His time at La Bastide-Fortunière school made a good impression on his teachers: he is an average student but whose qualities of camaraderie and friendliness are recognized. His loving mother, who has deep religious feelings, thinks that the day will come when young Joachim will enter the Orders and may be parish priest of La Bastide.

His great pleasure is to lead alone the horses to the village trough. At the age when a horse seems formidable to a child, Joachim, who has an unusual vigor, already knows how to subdue them.

An amazing ability to lead

These predispositions did not arouse any suspicion among his parents who obtained a scholarship to send him, at 10 years old, to the Saint-Michel college in Cahors. He will stay there for 8 years. It is there that he will have as a comrade Jean Bessières from Prayssac, a future Marshal of the Empire. An unwavering friendship is born between these two men who would become close to the emperor.

Far from La Bastide, the young Murat discovers unknown horizons which open up new appetites for him. His intelligence is real. But as soon as he crosses the threshold of the class, he takes a singular ascendancy on his comrades, even develops an astonishing capacity to lead. How to blame him? If he goes too far for his age, he knows how to repent, implore and become very sweet again.

His whole life, he will use these weapons. Many contemporaries believe that he is completely sincere. Going from anger to tenderness, from elation to dejection, he is already and will remain, impulsive, even excessive in everything. Not without kindness and generosity.

At 20, he joins the cavalry

At the age of eighteen, he joins the Lazarists' seminar in Toulouse. But wearing the cassock does not make the seminarian. And this handsome young man of 1.85 meters, with a pleasant smile, already leads, outside the establishment, a private life the "good fathers" ignore. Here comes an important moment in Murat's life: his military engagement. It is allowed to think, with Jean Tulard, that after a quarrel, our too fiery seminarian was excluded from the University and dreading his father, takes advantage of the passage of the Cavalry of the Ardennes regiment to sign up for, he says "a life that does not displease him". In fact, the new Chasseur is "thrilled". He quickly stood out for his ability to train the most reticent horses and quickly became sergeant*.

For the simple rider, the days are repetitive and gruelling. After an early awakening (at six o'clock), you must groom sick animals, currycomb and brush them before preparing fodder, water and oats. It is only after this daily work, at ten o'clock that a soup is distributed. Then the upkeep chores of the stables. Strict rules still from the Ancien Régime! Because already Parisian ideas are swarming in the garrisons.

Giving free rein to his temperament, his need to be a leader, Murat, who places a lot of hope in the new ideas, takes the lead of the discontented men of the Regiment. This behavior is little appreciated by his leaders: he is put on permanent leave and expelled from the army. Humiliated, he decides to go back to the Lot. We are in 1789.

Delivery Clerk in Saint-Céré

Very badly received by his father who cuts him off, he returns to Saint-Céré where he is hired as a delivery clerk. For a few months, he was enraged, champing at the bit with impatience, convinced that his place is not here. The villages are buzzing. He became aware of the real state of France, of the mounting demands of the campaigns. Murat takes advantage of this return to his native land to attend and participate in public meetings of local clubs.

The past winter has been harsh and long. The harvest was poor. Lack of food and unemployment strike everywhere. Castles see their dovecote burned down. " Here will be hanged the first inhabitant who will pay the rent to the lord," says a poster from a Cahors merchant. It’s the revolt. Louis XVI summons the Etats Généraux on May 1, 1789 in Versailles. In 1790, for the Fête de la Fédération on July 14, each department must appoint two to three delegates. You can imagine that Murat is volunteering! The sympathetic, sweet talking but proud young man speaks. And it is in Lotois dialect that he expresses himself in cafes, wishing to reach the greatest number. The Revolution is born: Joachim Murat, who is part of the Third Estate by his origins, tries to change public opinion according to events. Every Sunday, he goes to Cahors: he listens, he harangues the crowd. He is on the Montfaucon list and is chosen to represent the Lot department.

The republican patriot leaves for Paris

Murat, 23, can go and explore the capital. It’s the consecration.

A new man is born. After a secular mass celebrated by former Bishop Talleyrand, speeches on the Champ de Mars ignite the crowds. One hundred thousand Parisians came to celebrate the first anniversary of the Capture of the Bastille. A year later, returning to the army, he is appointed to the King's Constitutional Guard, to protect but also to monitor Louis XVI. Indignant, the protester manifests a flawless patriotic commitment, calling himself a "pronounced republican", facing "this hideout of royalists who gravitate around the king". But the wind turns, Robespierre falls. His revolutionary passion almost interrupted his meteoric career. Bitter and worried, he is put on leave and returns for some time to Quercy, "wanting to become a simple plowman again".

Aide de camp

Skeptical about his future, then dejected, Murat quickly reacts, helped by the deputy for Gourdon, Jean-Baptiste Cavaignac, who encourages him to return to Paris. It is on the night of 12 to 13 Vendémiaire (October 5, 1795) that Murat is put in contact with the First Consul who needs him. He orders him to save the Convention threatened by the royalist riot. Forty cannons are placed by Squadron Leader Murat around the Tuileries Castle. Three hundred royalists will be killed. The government of the Republic is saved again. As Tulard points out: "From now on the star of Murat will merge with that of Bonaparte". No more depression, finally power and glory.

Promoted Bonaparte's aide-de-camp, he leaves for the Italian Campaign, direction Marengo. There, "his clothes will be riddled with bullets", but they will know victory.

He becomes Napoleon I's brother-in-law

In 1800, he marries Caroline, the First Consul's youngest sister, becoming the brother-in-law of the future Napoleon I. This marriage will give Murat an outstanding position among the marshals of the Empire. Quickly, he is invited to move to the Château des Tuileries and becomes part of the close entourage of the new master of France.

The rouser of men from the imperial epic will remain kind to his family at La Bastide. Coming from a small inn in Quercy to fly with his squadrons across Europe and into Egypt, Murat seems like a legendary character. Chateaubriand will devote long passages to him in the "Mémoires d'Outre Tombe". He will be admired by Stendhal, Dumas and Balzac. Three words characterize the King of Naples: ardor, ambition and panache. If he remains the most magnificent rouser of men the imperial epic will produce, he will invest much into the Lot whose deputy he will become in 1803.

And he will show kindness for his whole family. Especially for his mother, for whom he will show a deep attachment: he sends her rosaries blessed by the Pope.

The portrait he has done of Jeanne in 1792 will never leave him. It will be with him, in his homes, in his tent during his campaigns and in Naples, in his palace. He will build a castle for his "La Bastide family" in his native village, modeled on the Palais de l'Elysée, where he had resided as governor of Paris.

The King of Naples dies executed on October 13, 1815.

By André Décup

[Translation is mine.

Note: I translated by ‘sergeant’ the grade of Maréchal des Logis, which is its equivalent in the cavalry (and nowadays in the Gendarmerie).

There is no right translation for “entraîneur d’hommes”, I hope “rouser” doesn’t seem too weird in English.]

#napoleonic #joachim murat #newsletters articles #2017 #anyway i love him

[athingthatwantsvirginia]

As in Debbie Harry

PART FOURTEEN OF THE DO YOU SEE HER FACE? SERIES

Pairing: Jess Mariano x Original Character (Ella Stevens)

Warnings: implied sexy times, plentiful pop culture references

Word Count: 4.2K

Summary: Jess and Ella have a frank discussion, then go see a live performance of some angry music.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Gilmore Girls is often a very sex-negative show. There are many examples of the sex-negative narrative through the series, such as when Lorelai implies Paris is “the bad kid” for losing her virginity, or when Lane gets pregnant with twins the first time she has sex with Zach. In “Keg! Max!” Jess tries to pressure Rory into having sex while in a bedroom upstairs during Kyle’s party. In my opinion, that scene seemed a very clumsy (and, honestly, out of character) attempt to convey Jess’s inward situation outwardly without using words. It is a very difficult scene to watch and it is Jess’s worst moment in the whole series by far. With this chapter of my AU, I am in no way trying to trivialize that scene or be an apologist for that kind of behavior. It’s unacceptable in every way. Consent is extremely important, and should be clearly given by everyone involved each time they have sex.

Instead, I wanted to create a more positive representation of teen sex. Sex is a normal part of life, and people should not be shamed for having it. I wanted the conversation between Jess and Eleanor to be realistic and beneficial. And I wanted the morning after to be positive too. I wanted it to be clear that they both gave consent during the initial conversation and right before they actually had sex (because giving consent once does not mean giving consent forever). I wanted them to be safe and comfortable. I wanted them to make an effort to communicate with each other. Also, I personally think the show has a detrimental attitude towards virginity, especially considering how much slut-shaming there is, the incident with Paris being only one example. Virginity, in my view, is just a social construct, but that’s a conversation for another time.

In my AU, Jess does not pressure anyone into sex, and he never would. It’s monumentally problematic of Gilmore Girls to brush off the incident in “Keg! Max!” the way it does, so I wanted to make sure I addressed it before any sex happened in this story. It’s important to recognize problems in our favorite content and learn from them. So, I hope this chapter sends a better message about teenage sex and consent. And I hope I got my ideas across in this note. Please feel free to message me any time if you are going through something, want to talk, or anything else. I am always here. You can learn more about consent and find resources for sexual assault survivors here.

Legs crossed, warming both her hands with the to-go cup of tea from Luke’s, Ella listened intently as Lane gushed about Dave Rygalski. They sat in the gazebo, school bags forgotten on the old wood below them. Stars Hollow High was finally closed for fall break, a whole week off to celebrate Thanksgiving and prepare for the odd, torturous month until the sweet release of winter break as well. Lane was thinking out loud, trying to formulate a plan to get Dave to her house on Thanksgiving. Schemes involving classical Biblical guitar and stuffy outfits were being discussed when Rory finally arrived from the bus stop, binders in her hand and her Chilton skirt hitting her knees as she walked.

“Ah, if it isn’t my favorite Catholic school girl!” Ella called as Rory ascended the steps.

Rory scoffed. “It wasn’t funny two years ago, and it’s not funny now.”

“Humor is subjective.”

“Not in this case. You’ve reached an objective lack of humor.”

“Hey, not even Rory Gilmore can bend such universal rules,” Ella shrugged, smirking. Rolling her eyes, Rory plopped down between her two friends and blew out a tired breath, a tight squeeze on the small bench.

“Man, that boyfriend of yours is a bad influence. The heightened snark makes the two of you such a sorry lot,” Lane said.

Ella’s wicked grin only widened. “The snark existed well before Jess came along. I think it’s more my old age that’s making me bitter.” She paused, taking another sip. “Really Rory, I could paint your shoes. Your mom could hem your skirt. I think it’s time to make waves in the antiquated dress code community.”

“Expulsion’s just what I need six months before graduation,” Rory grumbled, digging around in her yellow backpack for her pager. There were fourteen messages from Dean. She let out a frustrated growl.

“Dirk Squarejaw again?” Ella asked, sympathetic.

Nodding, Rory sighed and put her head to Ella’s shoulder. “He just won’t shut up about that kiss with Tristan. I swear this all would’ve been easier if he’d ended up actually going to military school.”

“What do you say we throw off our men and just ride off together, Thelma?” Ella said, uttering a dreamy exhale.

“If only, Louise.”

Clearing her throat, Lane nudged Rory with an elbow and raised offended eyebrows.

“And, once you snag Dave, you’ll be part of the feminist killjoy club, too,” Ella said pointedly, smirking.

“You’ve been listening to too much Bikini Kill,” Lane said, cracking a smile.

“No such thing,” Ella retorted. “Revolution girl style now, baby.”

The three of them descended into a sprawling conversation of Thanksgiving plans, along with a rather colorful anecdote involving Rory’s Chilton frenemy Paris. No matter how exuberant she sounded, Ella couldn’t help but think she would get along well with Ms. Geller. A pleasant tingling had spread within Ella since leaving school, the bell finally chiming in seventh period trigonometry. The feeling always came along with breaks, and it was nice to be with Rory and Lane, chatting in their familiar, breezy way. Everyone was growing older, getting busier, getting boyfriends; it was rare the three musketeers got a true moment to themselves. Eventually, Lane had to go to Bible study, eager to get in good graces with her mother, to allow Dave to provide a musical holiday accompaniment.

Autumn brought early nightfall, and the light was just beginning to wane when a decrepit AMC Ambassador screeched to a halt in front of the diner. And Ella found herself not even surprised when Jess stepped out of the driver’s side, the keyring around his finger. A smirk crossed her lips and she scoffed a little, looking over at Rory, who shot her a suspicious glance.

“He’s back behind the wheel, huh?” Rory asked.

Ella’s face fell a little. “Oh, jeez, I’m sorry-”

Waving a dismissive hand, Rory only shrugged. “That accident wasn’t his fault.”

Letting out a breath of relief, Ella gave Rory a side-hug and another grin. “You’re the best, Gilmore.”

“Second only to you, Ella.”

Glancing over at Jess, Ella rolled her eyes. He leaned against the car, gazing at her. His hands shoved in his pockets, hair gelled up, a leather jacket over his Clash t-shirt. A blush almost rose to her face at the sight of him, but she bit the inside of her cheek and smirked wider instead.

“You need something, Mariano?” she called smugly, and Rory chuckled at her side.

Jess shrugged. “Just didn’t want to interrupt.”

“Oh, how polite of you,” she shot back, then looked over at Rory in askance. The brunette nodded and gave her one last hug.

“Lunch tomorrow?”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Ella replied, gathering up her stuff and shaking her head in disbelief as she approached the car, and the boy next to it. “Where’d you get the rust bucket, Mariano?”

“Whatever, soccer mom,” he retorted.

She narrowed her eyes at the insult to her station wagon. “You’re on thin ice. Where’d you even find this?”

“Gypsy sold it to me. Not so pretty, but I got a good deal.”

She nodded, placing her hands on the back of his neck and lacing her fingers together. His arms came to rest around her waist. Ella glanced back around him to the car. “Ah, I wouldn’t write her off too quick. She’s got good bones.”

“Wait to look on the bright side, blondie,” he said, kissing her cheek.

“As in my hair or as in Debbie Harry?” she asked, expectant. “There is a right answer.”

Jess snorted. “Debbie Harry. How could you even ask?”

“Just checking,” she smiled, pressing her lips to his. For a moment, she was caught up, and the kiss deepened. But then she remembered they were still standing in the center of town, and she pulled away as her cheeks heated up.

Jess chuckled at her blush as she took a step back and cleared her throat, running a hand through her loose hair self-consciously.

“Shut up, James Dean” she warned playfully, narrowing her eyes. “With this car? I think you’ve reached caricature status in public opinion.”

“Don’t type-cast me.”

She continued despite his mock defense, ruffling his gelled mess of waves. “You’ve even got the hair to match.”

Rolling his eyes, he swatted her hand away and pouted, trying to fix his look. “Just for that, I’m not letting you pick the music. And I’m not telling you what we’re doing for our surprise date tomorrow night.”

“What? I wasn’t aware the stakes were so high!”

Jess rolled his eyes again.

Before she could do any more damage to his cool exterior, he retreated back into his driver’s seat. Laughing wickedly, she came around to the passenger side and threw her bag in the back.

“I think it’d be perfectly fine for the date not to be a surprise. Where are we going?” she asked, hoping to lure it out of him.

“Somewhere,” he replied flatly, not phased.

Smiling wider at his secrecy, she threw a glance at the diner over her shoulder as he rolled away from town center. Punk blasted through the radio, and she turned it down just slightly so they could hear each other. Jess shot her a teasing glare, but said nothing about it.

“Y’know,” she said, “I’ve worked at Luke’s for three years and in all that time combined I didn’t make enough money to buy a car.”

“And what are you implying?” he asked, feigning innocence.

Ella only scoffed, taking his free hand in hers. She could feel the scar, where they’d pulled out the stitches.

.   .   .

Nowhere. It had been a long drive to nowhere in his car. But, Ella supposed, nowhere could be a kind of somewhere, anywhere. Eventually, though, they’d made it to Hartford and Jess turned back. The frigid sky was darkening to a deep, late autumn blue, and Luke was adding him to a Saturday night at the diner every time he came home past midnight. Upon arriving back in Stars Hollow, it was around ten, the shops were closed, but Jess didn’t want their time to end. Away from town, he felt lighter, easier. Everyone wasn’t watching him. Ella wasn’t the doe-eyed princess like Rory, and she didn’t have overbearing parents like Lane, but the townspeople still looked at him with plenty suspicious eyes when they walked hand-in-hand out in public.

Instead of Luke’s, where watchful figures persisted, they landed in Ella’s bedroom. He felt his muscles relax at the scent of lavender, sitting on her bed and leaning his back against the muraled wall. She laid next to him, shoes off but still fully clothed, atop the knit blanket. Joni Mitchell played a mournful tune over her turntable. Her candles were alight, and Jess would have felt sleepy if it weren’t for the book in his hands. Jess devoured A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, another gloomy tale (shocking) Ella had given him. She said she always read it around Christmastime, and he was beginning to see at least once reason for her Grinchy tendencies. And Ella held Anna Karenina in front of her. It was not her first foray into the Russians, but she had never been too thrilled with them. Jess seemed to believe this one would win her over. A few chapters in, and she doubted it.

“Jess?” she asked as the clock ticked nearer to eleven.

“Hm?”

“Are we gonna have sex?”

Choking for a second in surprise, Jess cleared his throat. He scoffed out a chuckle. “What, like, now?”

Ella laughed, shoving his arm playfully. She sat up and faced him, flushed and anxious, though her voice was even. “No. For one, my dad’s still awake. But, I just mean...we do pretty much everything up to having sex, but we’ve never had sex. We’ve been together for almost three months. I just figured we should talk about it.”

Shutting his book, Jess crossed his arms over his chest. “Has anyone ever told you that you have a talent for subtlety?”

She rolled her eyes. “My bluntness is at least half my charm.”

“‘Charm’ is a pretty strong word.”

Launching a teasing pillow at his face, Ella giggled. “I’m trying to be serious here, Mariano.”

“Okay, sorry. Go on.”

“Okay. So...sex.”

He bit his lip to fight off a smirk. “Yes?”

“Well, have you had sex?” she asked.

“Yeah. There was one girl back in New York. Tara. She was nice, I guess. But it wasn’t a Nora Ephron type deal or anything.”

“You like Nora Ephron?” she interrupted, brows furrowed. Not incredulous, only perplexed.

He narrowed his eyes momentarily but ignored the interjection. “I dated her when I was a freshman and then she moved to Albany. Then, your best friend Shane-”

“Fuck off.”

“Not a chance. But, the answer is yes.” Then, after a pause, he furrowed his brows. It occurred to him what a gray area that part of her past was to him. “Have you?”

She nodded. “Hm-mm. A couple times.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah,” she said, smiling shyly at the way he tilted his head. There was no judgement in his voice. “Right after my mom died, I went to a couple parties...Well, not parties. They were more like get-togethers. Anyway, I got super stoned. This kid Brian smoked with me and we just sorta…did it. There were a couple more parties that year. Rinse. Repeat. Eventually, I started working more and just stopped going.”

“And you never-”

“No, never got together with him,” she answered before he even had to ask. “I never had a ‘relationship’ with anyone. Never had sex with anyone else. It was a good thing, though, I think. Being with him. At the time, I felt so shitty. For just a little while, it made me feel better. He’s a nice kid. Plays for the marching band. Sometimes sex is just sex, y’know?”

“Yeah, sometimes,” Jess agreed. “But...with us?”

Running a hand through her hair, Ella felt her insides flutter at the look he gave her. It was almost….open? Not quite, but almost. “Well, do you wanna have sex with me?”

Swallowing dryly, Jess nodded and hoped he didn’t appear as flustered as he felt. “Yeah. Yeah, I do...Do you wanna have sex with me?”

“Yeah,” she said, nodding casually. It felt odd, talking so frankly with him. But it wasn’t uncomfortable. In fact, it was exciting. Would it feel different with a boyfriend? She bet it would.

He cleared his throat, doing his best to hold her hazel gaze. “Good, then. That’s good.”

“I think it is, yeah.”

Bringing a hand to his shoulder, she pulled him in for a short, sweet kiss. And Jess’s heart felt light, relieved. Sometimes, Ella was challenging, she was complicated. But, when it was just the two of them, without all the noise which surrounded their daily lives, it was just so easy. And he could remember no other person he’d ever felt so at home with, who understood him so completely. And when she pulled away, he could still feel the ghost of her lips on his own.

“Alright, I’ve got to finish this chapter,” she said, grabbing her book again and shifting next to him, her back against the mural and her head coming to rest on his shoulder. When she cracked open the pages to her marked place, Jess following suit, she sighed. “This book is excruciating. Why would anyone read this recreationally?”

“You really wanna talk excruciating, Stevens?” he wagered, eyebrows raised as he looked down at her. “Need I remind you of Finnegan’s Wake? And don’t even get me started on this so-called Christmas book.”

“It is a Christmas book,” she argued, gesturing down to the Betty Smith novel in his hands.

Jess shook his head. “Just because Christmas happens in a story doesn’t make it a Christmas story. This is the Godfather debate all over again.”

She sighed once more. “You're never gonna convince me The Godfather isn’t a Christmas movie. Give it up, James Dean.”

“Only like fifteen minutes of that movie takes place at Christmas, my god, how many times-”

.   .   .

Just before official closing, Luke came back from Doose’s with supplies for Thanksgiving to stock the back room. The diner was to stay open on Thursday, and Luke would feed traditional turkey dinner to whoever stepped through the door. The past two years, Ella had worked all day, eating with Luke, Lorelai, and Rory during down times. The year before, she’d also gone to her aunt’s house following her shift to see the kids. But, with Fiona moved in and engaged to her father, the obligations had changed drastically. She was still working the morning shift, but was due home no later than two. Her older brother was coming, along with her aunt, her aunt’s husband, and her nieces.

Cleaning the counter with lemony disinfectant, she watched her boss trudge through the diner with heavy bags to the stockroom. Luke declined her offer to help carry things, as she had known he would. Instead, she was to keep closing.  The clock ticked rhythmically on the wall, and the anxiety for the approaching holiday mixed in her stomach with excitement and pleasant nerves for what the evening was to hold. Jess had slipped out the door around lunch time with the blue vest in the pocket of his leather jacket, telling her he’d be back around nine. And he still wouldn’t budge and tell her where they were going for their ‘secret date.’ But it wasn’t as though she didn’t know why. He hadn’t been able to treat her during their first date, and every date since had been more of a casual hang-out, or a mutually-arranged affair. He still wanted to show her what was, in his opinion, the first date she deserved. So, she wouldn’t argue too much. When the bell over the door sounded, Ella smirked before she even looked up to see him.

“Ready to spill your guts, James Dean?” she asked immediately as he came and sat at the counter in front of her.

Jess scoffed. “Eager much?”

“Jackass much?”

He rolled his eyes. “Are you almost done?”

Nodding, Ella threw the rag in her hand into the dirty bin below the counter. She could hear Luke rummaging around in the back still.

“Hey Luke?” she called.

He came out with his hands on his hips, baseball cap in its rightful place as always. “Yeah?”

“I’m finished out here. Alright if I clock out?” she asked.

Luke eyed his nephew suspiciously, who looked back at him with his usual smug smirk. “Only if Walmart’s favorite stock boy doesn’t keep you out too late.”

The expression fell on Jess’s face and was replaced with furrowed brows, mouth set in a thin line. He’d managed quite a many few months keeping the secret from Luke, until he’d got his car. It was only after Luke accused him of prostitution that he finally came clean. And the teasing had been relentless ever since.

“Don’t worry,” Ella said, smiling as she went to the kitchen to clock out and hang her apron.

With Ella out of the room, Luke pointed a finger at his nephew and took on an accusatory stance. “No drinking, no smoking, no-”

“No drugs, no five-dollar street corner sex, I got it,” Jess interrupted begrudgingly.

Luke grunted in annoyance and rolled his eyes, but said nothing more as he went around to the cash register and started to close it out. Emerging from the back, Ella smoothed her hands over her simple black dress, then pulled her sleeves down over her hands nervously. Suddenly, she wondered if she wasn’t dressed for wherever they were going. She wished she had asked earlier.

“Okay, time to spit it out,” she said, rounding the corner of the counter and grabbing his hand to pull him up. They walked towards the door and she donned her peacoat, taking her shoulder bag, emptier than normal without all the school contents.

Jess smirked. “But what if a blindfold is part of the plan?”

“No fucking way.”

“Hey!” Luke piped up from the register at her language. The attempt at scolding was half-hearted, though.

Rolling her eyes with good nature, Ella followed Jess out the door. “Sorry. Night, boss.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Luke said with a small smile, waving a dismissive hand at the two kids.

Once outside, Ella could see her breath in the night and she was glad she’d worn her thick black tights. Her Doc Martens crunched the orangey piles of dry leaves noisily as they descended the front steps and made their way across the street to Jess’s car. Before they could get in, though, Jess stopped in his tracks and turned to her, leaning against the car doors.

“I’m waiting,” she teased, eyebrows raised impatiently.

After reaching in his pocket momentarily, Jess went to tuck a strand of hair which had fallen from her low bun behind her ear. Then, he revealed a set of ear plugs in his hand, and Ella’s brow furrowed though her smile widened in nostalgia.

“What’s up, Houdini?”

“Figured you might need these. Since we’re going to see the Distillers and all.”

“Are we?” she asked, taking the earplugs from him.

Nodding, Jess brought the tickets from his pocket and held them up for her to see. She broke out in a grin.

“Not bad, Mariano.”

“Yeah, I know you’re more into melancholia, but you were listening to my CD the other week. So, when I saw they were coming to Harford, I figured...” he trailed off humbly, shrugging. “And we’ve been together almost three months and I still haven’t seen those famous Eleanor Stevens dance moves.”

She chuckled, flushing slightly. He could smell her rosemary scent as she leaned closer and rested her hands on the back of his neck. “Don’t know if you’re ready for that. They’re deadly.”

“In more ways than one I’ve heard,” he quipped.

“Shut up,” she said. “This is awesome, Jess. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

And she brought him in for a kiss, smiling into it. Jess could feel his shoulders release their tension. He hadn’t known if she’d be happy. They were one of his favorite bands, and he’d heard rumors of their coming to town when she’d chosen them as her angry music weeks earlier. Though he wasn’t big on signs, he thought maybe the universe was telling him to share the experience with her. Let her in. It didn’t make him any less nervous, though. It was always there in the back of her mind, that worry she would realize what everyone else in the town already had. That he wasn’t good enough for her. But as he felt her hands in his hair, warmed by her touch in the cold November air, he couldn’t help but forget his fears for just a moment.

.   .   .

Mid-morning light streamed through the small window into Ella’s cramped bedroom. Her cacti sat on the dresser, soaking up the sunshine, as Jess and Ella slept soundly on the mattress. Wearing a big KISS t-shirt, Ella turned over in her sleep and faced Jess, his arm draped over her tightening slightly. A shirtless Jess lay beneath the whitish blanket next to her, snoring softly. His jeans and t-shirt were strewn near the bed, along with Ella’s dress. Still pumped full of adrenaline after the concert, Ella had crept through the house the night before to make sure everyone was asleep, then snuck Jess through her window. And their first time together was even better than she’d imagined. Sweet and a little awkward and wonderful, reminding her almost of their first kiss months before. And, afterwards, they’d stayed up talking for hours, with a fair amount of teasing from Jess over the t-shirt she’d decided to wear to bed. KISS was perhaps her biggest guilty pleasure.

Upon a soft knocking on Ella’s creaky white door, Jess began to stir. He cleared his throat and rubbed at his tired eyes before fully waking, becoming aware of his surroundings. Then, a voice came from the hallway outside.

“Ella? Fiona wants to take us to Doose’s to get Thanksgiving stuff!”

Sitting up slightly, Jess saw Ella was still deep asleep.

“Elle? Wake up,” he said, shaking her shoulder gently. It took at least thirty seconds before her eyes finally fluttered open.

“Hm?”

“You gotta wake up. Someone’s at your door,” he said quietly, hastily. Another knock sounded on the wood, and Jess glanced up, biting his lip.

Taking in a sharp breath, Ella nodded and her hazy eyes blinked harshly awake. The knocking on the door was persistent now, and her brother called her name a couple more times. She gestured for Jess to move to the corner near the dresser, out of view of the door, as she rushed over to open it. Poking her head out, she kept the door almost shut so only her face could be seen.

“God, Adam, knock louder, would you?” she snapped tiredly.

Adam took a step back at her irritated tone, squinting behind his glasses at her behavior. “It’s not my fault you’re too lazy to get up on time.”

“Didn’t realize we had an appointment scheduled,” Ella shrugged, trying to make her tone lighter.

Shrugging back, Adam began to walk off. “We’re leaving for Doose’s in fifteen.”

“Fine,” she grumbled, shutting the door loudly as he walked away.

“Wow, you’re not a morning person,” Jess remarked, a sardonic twinkle in his eye as he spoke from behind her. When she looked back, he was almost fully dressed already, buckling up his belt. “I gotta get back. Luke’s gonna be pissed.”

“Oh, fuck, you’re right,” Ella sighed, running a hand through her messy locks. She didn’t know why she hadn’t thought about it sooner. Sometimes Jess seemed so independent, so out on his own, she forgot how much Luke had invested in taking care of him.

Jess only shrugged. “My fault. I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I’ll tell him I was reading at the lake and just dozed off.”

“You don’t have to do that,” she said immediately, shaking her head.

He came over to her and put an arm around her waist, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “It’s fine. He’ll be less mad at both of us. Win-win.”

“You think he’ll buy it?” she asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

“I have my ways.”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, whatever, James Dean.”

Chuckling, he pecked her lips and took one long look at her. Before he could help it, or worry about feeling stupid, he smiled down at her. Crooked and sincere. And Ella smiled back.

“I had a good time,” she said.

Jess nodded in agreement. “Me too. The best of times.”

Sighing lightly, she rolled her eyes. “How do you always manage to bring up Dickens?”

“It’s a gift and a curse.”

And even after he pressed one final kiss to her lips, disappearing out the window and down the street, she couldn’t seem to wipe the smile off her face.

#jess mariano au #jess mariano imagines #jess mariano imagine #gilmore girls au #gilmore girls fanfiction #jess mariano #jess #mariano #gilmore girls #jess mariano x oc #gilmore girls oc #original character #original character stories #luke danes #rory gilmore #lane kim

[ixchel-sketch]

TITLE: Christmas Puppy GENRE: Crime & Romance FANDOM: Mayans M.C. SHIP(S): Coco & Original Female Character  STATUS: Complete LENGTH:  2, 861 words

@fcundwings​ asked for #24 from here for Maya and Coco (alt. timeline) “Buying animal-proof fairy lights, confusing their S/O, but it all makes sense when there’s an ENTIRE puppy in their living room on Christmas day.”

There wasn’t much that Maya and Coco shared when it came to growing up but one thing that the both of them shared was a streak of shitty holidays. It was usually a challenge to get Coco to open up about his past and she’d long since given up on trying to pry anything out of him. His mother had apparently been terrible, una sucia, and even with her second generation conversational spanish she could put enough together to understand what he meant. Coco had never really had much of a Christmas before his time with the M.C. and rooming with Angel, and even then the actual day had often been spent alone when most of the guys had a girl or family to spend their time with. 

Maya’s family had always been a mess as well, but the tight budget she grew up on was nothing compared to the cruelty that Celia had shown her son. Her parents may not have been able to provide her much but at least they had tried. She’d had birthday parties and sleepovers...even a dog. Weeks after the conversation and she still couldn’t quite get over a story that he finally felt comfortable enough to share about how things were for him as a kid. Though she’d managed to keep a straight face at the time. 

“So...you ever had a pet?” Maya had been laying with her head in his lap while music played in the living room. There was a whole tray of pizza rolls cooking in the oven and the two passed a joint while lounging and waiting for the timer to go off. 

Coco shrugged and leaned his head back so that for a moment he was looking up at the ceiling instead of down at her. One of his hands which had been idly playing with her hair stilled before resuming his actions in a more controlled fashion. “Had a dog, not for very long though.” 

“What happened?” 

“Got hit by one of my mom’s johns.” The joint is held to his lips for a long inhale, and for a moment she thinks that’s all he had to say. So she stays quiet, nearly holding her breath in the hope he might add more. “Bitch was pissed, said it was my fault for letting him get out.”  

“Oh.” Maya stayed silent before pushing herself up to sit curled up at Coco’s side. His  expression was far off and she had a feeling if she gave any sort of condolences it would just push him away. In an attempt to stop the mood from getting dark she tried her best to find a relevant non sequitur. “What’s your favorite kind of dog?” 

He side eyes her for a moment, surprised at the way the conversation turned. “I never really thought about it. The fluffy kinds I guess.” 

Her eyebrows shoot up and it's a challenge to stop her jaw from going slack. The image of Johnny Coco Cruz curled up with a small furry puppy is almost too much for her to handle. To stop the grin from teasing her lips she directs her attention to playing with some of the hair at the base of his neck, appreciative of how long he’s let it grow. Coco leans back into the touch with a sigh, any tension from the earlier memories draining away. “But do you like dogs?” 

“What kind of question is that? Of course I like dogs.”

“Then how come you don’t have one?” 

As far as she knew Coco’s landlord didn’t have any rules against pets. His house wasn’t big but  it was more than she’d ever dreamed of having, and much more space than she really needed. But staying there was fulfilling in a way that vending and attending festivals couldn't quite match and despite her reservations Maya had become comfortable in his space. Though not enough to give up travelling just yet. 

“I just never thought about it. It’s not like I’m home a whole lot.” Maya’s hand lowers from carding through Coco’s hair so that she can snake her arm around his shoulders and place a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. His lips quirked up into a half smile before he wasted no time pulling her even closer, nearly into his lap. The arm that had been resting along the back of the couch settled against her lower back and his hand sank into her shorts pocket to cup her ass. 

“I kinda like it here though.” She muttered in between kisses, one of her legs swinging across his lap so she could properly straddle him. A thrill going up her spine at the soft groan that Coco lets out against her neck, rolling his hips up against her in a slow teasing motion. 

“I like it when you’re here.” 

She smiles against his hair as Coco continues to nip and kiss down her neck, nosing the strap of her tank top aside and pressing an open palm to her breast as Maya arches against him. The next time he moves his hips against hers she makes sure to grind back down onto him, eliciting another noise and pushing their ascending lust closer to desperation. Right as the tempting thought of slipping off her shorts and having her way with him right there enters the brunette’s cloud of thoughts, the alarm on the oven dings and signals that their forgotten snacks are finally done. 

“Fuck…” Coco complains, leaning back against the couch as Maya bolts upright with the alarm. Her anxiety and his PTSD always in competition for who is more alert. 

“I’ll take out the tray and meet you in the bedroom?” Her heart is still racing but logic fights to the surface, hunger not nearly as important as what they had just been doing. 

He agrees, giving a quick nod as she rises from his lap and heads towards the kitchen to perform her task with the added goal of not burning herself in anticipation. They’ve only been together for a few months, split up by weeks where she’s out of town or days where he’s doing some kind of business for the M.C. It makes their visits all the more sweet, and provides just a bit of justification for the two locking themselves away for days at a time. By the time she gets back to the bedroom her top is crumpled up in her hand and the top button of her shorts is undone. 

“¿Ya no tienes hambre?” His eyes were dark, tracking her across the room as she entered, slipping off her shorts and climbing over him once more. The warmth of his palms caused shivers to race up her spine as they settled on her thighs, thumbs smoothing over sensitive skin. 

“Nah.” Coco answers, pulling Maya down for a kiss as they resume their earlier actions. It doesn’t take long before the tent in his boxers is pressing insistently up against her thigh. The air between them gets hot and thin, leaving them panting between kisses and his hands caress and grope for any purchase as she arches against him. Black painted blunt fingernails leave only the lightest marks up his back and before long Coco is leaning so he can shimmy the boxers off his hips and legs. Maya follows suit with her own underwear, tossing them off to an empty corner of the room and enjoying the way he lets out a small huff of arousal at the view. After she climbed back on top one of the hands that had been gripping her thigh moved to slip a couple of fingers inside, feeling how wet she was. “Damn you feel good.” 

Her answering moan cuts through the space between them as Maya rocks against him, enjoying the feeling of his fingers stretching her, his thumb finding her clit and rubbing small circles against it. It doesn’t take long before she’s nearly shaking, thighs clenched around him and her own hand fumbling to make him pause so she can finally move and lower herself onto his cock.  Coco nods wordlessly against her shoulder and reclines, groaned when she places an open palm on his chest for balance and tightens around him. There’s some added pleasure to the sense of control in their position and she sets the pace, encouraged by Coco’s harsh pants and occasional grunts. His grip on her waist tightens, urging her to move faster until her orgasm tears Maya’s attention away from everything else in the room except him. The brunette doubled over, crying out into her lover’s shoulder as his thrusts became uneven and he followed close behind. Maya pressed a kiss to his lips one more time before rolling off to curl up at Coco’s side, the pizza rolls on the kitchen counter completely forgotten. 

After that Maya didn’t think about the conversation they shared for months. It wasn’t until Coco asked her if she was going to be in town for Christmas or whatever that the beginnings of a plan started to form. It takes just a few more randomly timed queries for her to figure out whether or not her present is actually a good idea and not just her constant underlying impulse to finally get a dog. However once she brings up the potential of it to Leticia there seems to be no more room for debate. It was no longer just a present for Coco, but also something that her and Letty would be able to bond over. A harmless secret that brought them closer. 

“I haven’t seen Leti come out of her room in a couple days.” Coco remarked as Maya rabidly opened a box of fairy lights. She’d never had the experience of owning a christmas (though she preferred to call it Yule) tree before but her Jewish mother had always decorated their porch with tiny blinking lights. Now she was decorating theirs with ones that would be safe against small canine teeth that would be freed to roam the house soon. 

“She has a test after the break.” Her face heated with the lie and she couldn’t meet his eyes. It was pure luck that he hadn’t become suspicious of their scheming up until this point. 

“She told you that?” 

His tone is full of disbelief and Coco comes to sit behind her and she automatically regrets not coming up with a more realistic excuse. Not to say they hadn’t been working on fixing Leticia’s grades since she moved to Santo Padre but… Maya tries to keep her voice steady even as his warm palms land on her shoulders. She absolutely does not jump (just a little).  “Yep.” 

“Hm..” For a moment she’s worried that he’ll press the issue. Or worse, go and confront Leticia about the fib right away. Instead Coco reaches past her to pick up the line of tiny bulbs going around the tree. “I thought you liked them blue and white ones?” 

“I do. But they were old, like half of them didn’t light up anymore. And these are more...festive.” Really it was the only color scheme left made in sturdier materials. The yellow, green, blue and red fairy lights were lifeless in their tangled judgement, but her excitement at actually being able to pull off the surprise rivaled any guilt that she had over lying. 

"Well you didn't have to do any of this. Not that it's not nice." Maya turned to place a soft kiss on his lips and giggles against him as Coco pulls her forward until she's nearly cradled in his lap. She gets a better read of where his mind is at as his arms circle her waist to hold her against him. 

"Leti is still home though," She muttered, her face hot from more than the earlier fabrication. It seemed like whenever the two of them got enough time together it usually ended with them wearing significantly less clothes than when their time began. And it was a point of pride for Maya that in all that time Leticia had not caught them in the act once.  Though Coco's hand rubbing circles on her back nearly caused her to forget her point. "She could come out of her room."

His ministrations didn’t stop there though, his other hand snaking through her hair to cup the back of Maya’s neck and pull her back into a kiss. Coco didn’t seem nearly as bothered by the danger of his formerly estranged daughter catching them heavy petting in front of the Christmas tree. Perhaps he was just cocky enough that the challenge of getting caught was more a thrill than abject turn off. Either way he moves them so that now he’s looming over her, her back pressed against the couch and she gasped loudly against his shoulder. Maya’s legs loosely pressed into his sides and his eyes go dark when she pulls him closer, one of her hands caressing his chest in invitation. His voice tight with lust. “Then you’ll just have to be quiet.” 

She grins and wraps her arms around his shoulders to pull him closer, the tangle of wires and bulbs forgotten in a heap somewhere in the midst of their affections. He goes back to press a trail of kisses against the side of her throat, nipping at her pulse without leaving too much of a mark. The way that his breath switches from silent to steady and heavy huffs against her skin sends shivers running up Maya's spine.

"Me encanta tus besos," He chuckles a bit at her ever improving spanish but places another open mouthed kiss on her shoulder in answer. For the hundredth time that day she's grateful she chose to blow off the festival to spend time with him. "Feliz navidad." 

Maya had expected some kind of reaction, whether a legitimate laugh or roll of his eyes but instead Coco goes still. At first she's not sure what's caused the sudden change, deep dark eyes going alert and darting to look off in the distance. "You hear that?"

She doesn't have time to answer, mind struggling to come out of the fog of arousal he'd created when the realization of what he'd probably heard slams into her. Coco is already on his feet and halfway to the door of Leti's room before Maya has time to stop him, the soft cursing and pleas coming from the other side of the door gave a bad impression and she can’t blame his suspicious reaction. 

"I told you ---the fuck?" 

Her heart almost stops with the sudden rush of anxiety. At least that's how it feels with Coco standing in the doorway with an unreadable expression on his face and Leticia’s room tossed as though a small tornado came through. One of the pillows Maya had bought her to decorate is strewn across the room as well as papers and anything else that the puppy in the middle of the room could get it’s mouth around. The soft thump of the it’s tail hitting the floor was the only sound that anyone made, Leti’s eyes wide and her jaw hanging open. It’s obvious what happened from the steam that’s still coming out of her bathroom and the towel wrapped around her head. The teenager’s shoulder’s slump when her eyes lock on Maya’s and she shrugs in a silent my bad. 

“Shit, okay, okay. This is my fault.” She’s not the bravest person and the way that Coco’s intense gaze swings in her direction for further explanation makes Maya feel like she needs to hide. Fighting past that, the brunette takes a deep breath and turns to face him. “Merry christmas! We got you a puppy!” “You did what?” “Remember a few months ago when I asked if you liked dogs, then a few weeks later when I asked if you ever thought about having one?” “...Sure. I guess.” 

“Well,” The brindle coat terrier perks up from where he’s been sitting, completely oblivious to the tension. Strolling over to pick him up so that Coco can look into it’s small brown eyes. He still looks surprised but the edge to his stare has softened, one inked hand coming up to rest on it’s small furry head. “I know he’s not exactly fluffy but…” 

He takes the chubby puppy into his arms, eyes a little bit shiny though neither Maya or Leticia would dream of commenting on it. “Nah, el es perfecto.” 

Finally the expression on Leticia’s face relaxed and she went back to her frustration at the mess that had been made of her room and Maya knew she was going to have to get her another throw pillow in apology.  But even that annoyance didn’t seem to distract from the rare moment of peace and joy that was shared between the three of them. Unable to resist any longer Maya wove her arms around Coco and pressed a kiss against his shoulder, grinning through her own misty eyes when he returned a kiss to the crown of her head. 

“You still gotta name him.” 

#mayans fanfic #mayans smut #johnny coco cruz #coco cruz #ixchel ortiz (original character) #i needed to get this finished #because it it NO WHERE near winter holidays #so i was not vibing this by the end tbh

[lemon-writings]

Hamish Update: Hamish Pt. II

Genre: Adult literary fiction // Status: Rewriting // Progress: 53,548 words

Pt. I

I’m back with chapters IV-VI! Hoo boy, is it an event.

Chapter IV

Epitaph: “The things that go unsaid are often the things that eat at you--whether because you didn't get to have your say, or because the other person never got to hear you and really wanted to.”-Celeste Ng, Everything I Never Told You

This is the chapter where we meet Ofelia! She is one of my favorite characters to write for. She is beautiful and wonderful and a goddess and I adore her. (I’m reading myself for filth through the character of Ofelia because she is literally both my type and the woman I’ve always wanted to be.) Ofelia is the Queen of Roasts.

There are also some confrontations between Hamish and his mother, which I live for.

Excerpts: 

First of all, I love Ofelia. Ofelia Bello, if you are free this Thursday, I’m free to hang out any time. Again, Ofelia Bello, if you are on Thursday, I’m free to hang out. Please.

She’s a goddess. Literal goddess.

She looked at me, eyes large and all-seeing, more like fire opals set into the bronze of her face than eyes. I felt as though she were seeing into the very essence of my being, judging me like a god. Ofelia was one of those people who would never be referred to as mortal. She was Prithvi; she was Freyja; she was Persephone. She was anything but mortal, made of fire, flowers, and knowledge.

And a savage. She’s That Bitch every moment of every day, even when she has her “perfect daughter and sister” persona on. And when she doesn’t? Well...

“You could fight back,” she said. “You could make yourself known, reveal who and what you are. Scream, I’m a person, not a thing.” Ofelia fixes the wisps of hair arranged around her face into a perfect frame. 

“I’m not a fighter,” I said.

“No,” Ofelia said, watching me carefully. “You’re a runner.” She uncrossed her legs and stretched them out. “He doesn’t like fighters. That’s me. That’s my brother. He loves runners. If you can confront your issues, you won’t stay for long.”

Hamish confronting his mother when she dismisses his childhood trauma is honestly *chef’s kiss*. Writing my characters being savages is one of my favorite things to do, right after dramatic, floral descriptions of women. 

(TW: referenced child abuse!)

“Ungrateful for what? My nightmares? My feelings of abandonment? My hatred of authority? Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me, mother. Without yours and father’s amazing parenting, I would’ve grown up to be a well-adjusted adult.”

And the trademark Soft Moment of the chapter. 

(TW: death mention!)

“Don’t die,” you whispered, hot and damp against my face. “Please don’t die.”

“I won’t,” I promised you, so open and honest it felt like I’d cracked open my ribs to expose my child’s-heart to you like a blossoming flower. 

The tension between all the characters has increased so much in this chapter and tbh the anticipation is killing me, and I know what happens in this book.

Chapter V

Epitaph: “At parties I point to my body and say This is where love comes to die. Welcome, come in, make yourself at home. Everyone laughs, they think I’m joking.”--Warsan Shire, “The House”

This chapter begins with Hamish and Horacio in an interview about their “relationship”. There’s something lovely about the way that Horacio and Hamish talk about each other, even if it is built on half-truths. Then we’re introduced to Leon, Ofelia’s brother, and oh boy. Oh boy. Is that a wild ride.

This is also the chapter where Hamish begins planning how he’s going to get Claude to confess to the murder, via a PowerPoint presentation. Yes. Yes, good.

Excerpts:

The first is when Horacio is asked when he knew he was in love with Hamish. It’s just... soft. As a former theatre kid, this really is the dream.

“No,” I said, tearing my eyes from you. “We were in Theatre 101 together, and he was reading Doctor Faustus and playing all the parts. He was jumping around and doing different voices, being really dramatic and having the time of his life. It was the first time I’d seen him act young instead of like a wistful old man.”

I didn’t tell her that you’d been wearing a black hoodie with the moon phases printed on it, the strings following you as you leaped from place to place, sticking your tongue out when you fumbled a line, your tongue stud glittering in the lights. It felt too intimate to share with the world. When I saw you in the lights, being a goofy young man for even just a moment, in your purest state of adorable in your glee, my heart expanded well past the confines of my too-tight ribcage.

Here’s Horacio’s mention of his past ex-boyfriends, because he can hardly believe that he is in a semi-functional relationship with anyone, even if it’s fake.

(TW: sex and abuse!)

It was simple symbiosis: I was a parasite, and they were the hosts, defending themselves against me with violence. I don’t think any of them ever loved me, just loved using me while I would use them, trying to nibble on their scraps of affection between beatings and the rough sex.

Leon is... a lot. He’s sort of obsessed with masculinity, like someone who watched Fight Club without really realizing it’s meant to be satire and wants to punch whoever talks shit about him.

Leon was one of those guys who either believed he was better than you or you weren’t worth his time. Sometimes, in his more complex moments, he would believe both at once; at his most simplistic, he would believe neither. 

The further I go in this work, the more difficult it gets to pick excerpts!

Chapter VI

Epitaph: “Even still, we run. We have not reached our average of 57.92 years without knowing that you run through it, and it hurts and you run through it some more, and if it hurts worse, you run through it even more, and when you finish, you will have broken through. In the end, when you are done, and stretching, and your heartbeat slows, and your sweat dries, if you've run through the hard part, you will remember no pain.”--Lauren Groff, The Monsters of Templeton

Hamish gives the presentation. It goes about as well as you can assume. Now that Genoveva and Claude know he’s onto them... it’s game time. There is so much plot that happens in this chapter that I can’t really mention much of it, other than this being the point where the work goes from a slow-building horror to more of a thriller. It’s a major turning point and climax. Whoo!

Also, Ofelia and Horacio bond, which is awesome! I love the dynamic between them. They have the sort of friendship where you can tell that they really enjoy each other and their company.

Excerpts:

Most of these are from the portion where Ofelia and Horacio are talking in the woods because 1.) it’s the least-spoilery part of this chapter and 2.) their friendship is one of the most light-hearted parts of this work. Please, allow me to indulge.

Ofelia isn’t necessarily a “bean”, but she’s still babey. I adore her.

Ofelia gave me a mysterious look, full of night sky and brilliance, then added a crescent of a smile. She began climbing, one foot and then the other, effortlessly lifting herself up the branches as if she was built to do nothing but ascend trees, her tights protecting her modesty from me as I struggled up after her, unused to the climb. 

And then Ofelia describes a dream of mine every wlw: going a group of young women and becoming the modern Sappho. 

“I think I’ll buy a house somewhere by the ocean. Live with a group of girls who love books and pictures. Become my own Sappho, create my own Lesbos.” 

Then there’s this astute observation from Horacio about how Hamish views himself. Hamish doesn’t have a very good self-image. At all. Then again, neither does Horacio. 

You’d make yourself into an object sometimes, a cyclone of emotions and pain, held together by frozen flesh and string. 

So that just about wraps up these chapters. IV-VI really is the most intense part of this work, and writing it is is just as intense as the chapters themselves. 

Songs:

The music is mostly what I’ve been listening to while editing this post, since I already wrote these chapters, but they’re still jams

Your Love (Deja Vu) - Glass Animals

In the Heat of the Moment - Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds

Blood In the Cut - Seattle Sessions - K.Flay

Peach Scone - Hobo Johnson

That’s all for now! Part III will contain the falling action/the part where it gets Real.

Tell me if you’d like to be added to the tag list! :)

#wip: hamish #writing update #writing project #amwriting #writeblr #tw: abuse #tw: death mention #tw: sex #i adore Ofelia so much #and Horacio #these characters are terrible awful people. i love them so much

[tsarina-anya]

( JODIE COMER, SHE/HER, FEMALE ) HEAR YE, HEAR YE! Allow me to introduce KATARINA CECILIA OLDENBURG of SWEDEN. The 26 year old PRINCESS, DUCHESS OF NARKE  is known to be AMBITIOUS and QUICK-WITTED , but rumors about court claim SHE can be MANIPULATIVE and CUNNING when crossed. Only time will tell where their interests belong. Penned by CLAIRE ( gmt+11 + 22 + she/her ). 

THE BASICS

Name: Katarina Cecilia Oldenburg

Age: 26

General physical description: Cascading blonde hair, light green eyes and a face of an angel creates a beautiful picture. With a smile that could charm anyone, Katarina is considered a gorgeous Swedish princess.

Relationship status: Unmarried

Current family: Sister to the current regent of Sweden. She understands her role is to marry well and further the power of their kingdom. Half sister of the King of Sweden.

Relationship with men: Katarina sees men for their uses. She sees them as easily manipulated and easy to control with a bat of her eyelashes and a sweet smile. She does respect powerful and strong men. Most men are seen as objects to the woman though, a mean to secure the life she craves. 

Relationship with women: Women are allies to Katarina bu

Job: Princess/ Duchess of Belkinge

Dress style: Katarina wears her hair down most of the time, which was considered wilder for the period of time. Dressing between dark and light colours, the woman uses the colours that emphasise her looks and weild those to her advantage. 

A BRIEF LOOK

Languages: French, Russian, Italian, English, Swedish.

Favorite pastimes: Hunting, riding, reading

Hobbies: Riding, studying languages, stitching (though she is not very good)

Favorite foods: Chocolate, rich fruits. 

PERSONALITY

Strongest positive personality trait: Charismatic. Katarina is a warm, charismatic woman. Her smile is enchanting, and she charms people with her personality and wit within moments. Well versed in language and communication, Katarina always enjoyed befriending visiting dignitaries and conversing about nations across the sea. 

Strongest negative personality trait: Manipulative. Katarina uses people and manipulates them to receive the means to her ends. She manipulates with a smile and a warmth that leaves many people oblvious to the fact that they are being manipulated and coerced by the woman to do her bidding.

Sense of humor: Outwardly, Katarina has a boisterous sense of humour and can often be seen laughing and indulging at banquets. Inwardly however, Katarina has an incredibly sarcastic and dark sense of humour. Few have seen this side of her, however.  

Temper: Katarina has a cold temper. Outwardly, she will not show her true emotions. However, if she is crossed or angry her anger would turn to ice. She becomes cruel, vindictive all without expressing her temper outwardly. 

Consideration for others: Katarina sees many people as a means to an end. While not outwardly cruel, the charismatic woman uses people to acheive her ends. Many people close to Katarina are chosen for their degree of usefullness. 

How other people see him/her: Katarina is outwardly beautiful and incredibly charismatic. She is warm and wins people over easily. They would view her as slightly adventurous due to her hobbies, however, she has a feminine grace. 

Opinion of him/herself: Katarina believes she can gain whatever she wishes through her limited experiences with people. She wants everything, and she isn’t afraid to manipulate and coerce to get what she wishes. 

Other traits, especially those to be brought out in story: Flirtatious. Katarina finds amusement in flirting with men to acheive what she wishes. She’s found that there is nothing a small and a bat of her eyelashes won’t accomplish.

AN ENDING

Ambitions: Katarina always wanted to ascend and become a queen. However, since her country was conquered by the King of Norway, her ambitions have changed course. Instead of being one queen of many, she wants to be the queen to whatever ultimate victor shall surface.

Philosophy of life: Hidden and patient, Katarina is in no hurry to reach her aims. 

Most important thing to know about this character: Katarina will stop at nothing to get what she wants, which is control and a proper throne to call her own. She may be patient with it, but she will eventually get what she wishes.

#gphq.intro #katarinaintro #hit me up to plot or like this and i'll slide on over into your dmsss

[sk-salazar]

Here are my favorite things and some amazing observations about “Change Your Mind”. Needless to say, there are spoilers.

💖 Those cute rainbow caterpillar bois that Pink brought to Homeworld. And the image in my head of them chasing the Pearls. 😂 Someone needs to draw that.

💖 That DejaBlue pun.

💖 Connie standing up to Mama Blue and using her strict parents to her advantage.

💖 Steven standing up for his support of fusion instead of just giving Blue an empty apology.

💖 Blue realizing that she was wrong to use her emotional manipulation powers on her loved ones all these eons. And her comment about Homeworld failing Pink instead of Pink failing Homeworld. So many kids who defy the status quo need to hear this.

💖 Blue hiding the kids in her hair loop.

💖 The symbolism behind Steven throwing off his Pink Diamond getup and putting on his own clothes to confront White. (Maybe they’re just more comfortable, but I feel like there’s a clear message there.)

💖 Blue saying, “She prefers to be called Steven.” Even if she didn’t use a male pronoun, I can see a message here of accepting your trans kid and defending their chosen identify. Even if it causes a strain in your marriage.

💖 Connie’s courage (again!) to stand up to Yellow. Everyone kept blaming Connie for “blowing Steven’s chance to talk to White” because she fused with him. And Connie’s statement about changing the rules for everyone was the best clapback to that. Steven knows he’s right. Steven knows that servitude is wrong. He knows that denying who you want to be and not loving who you want to love is wrong. So if he is to confront White Diamond, he must do it on his terms, not hers.

💖 Yellow crying of her own volition.

💖 Connie’s “face-off” pun and all the hand puns about the ships. 😂 And Bismuth wanting to uppercut an upper crust. The writing for this episode was 🔥.

💖 Steven saying “GASP!” instead of actually gasping. 😂

💖 Lapis’ and Peridot’s new forms! I’m so in love with Lapis’ palazzo pants and golden sandals! She looks like she has so much more personality now. 💙💚

💖 Peridot saying, “Who needs thumbs?” even tho they’re the reason humans are an advanced species. 😂

💖 Steven’s observation about all his forms. Pink represented the “flight” response and Rose represented the “fight” response. Both of which are primitive responses to conflict. Meanwhile, Steven represents using logic and compassion to foster dialogue. He’s the most ascended form.

💖 Blue saying, “In order to fix [our family], we must admit that it’s broken.” Here, she voices the most common fear of those people who always push back against progress.

💖 Yellow telling Steven to #TakeAKnee . I see what you did there, Sugar Woman. 😏

💖 Yellow having the courage to tell White that “we need to talk about us”. (I love all the throwback references in this episode! One of which is this line, which is a throwback to the episode about Greg and Rose.)

💖 Steven telling White to “let us in your head” or to “get out of your head”. To be “in your head” means that you’re self-centered and unconcerned about the world around you. Again, that 🔥 writing.

💖 Amethyst’s owl pun. 😂

💖 Steven fusing with all the Crystal Gems to save them. Not only was it a great idea in an emergency, but it’s a great plot device. It gives us the answer to our questions about who all the Steven fusions are, thereby making it easier to wrap up the show sometime in the near future.

💖 The new fusions!!! Rainbow Quartz is a posh twink, Sunstone is a positive, 80’s rapper-esque cool dude role model for kids and Obsidian fucking Te Ka.

💖 Rainbow Quartz blowing a raspberry, Rainbow Quartz blasting off with a literal rainbow trail, Rainbow Quartz’s “two stones and one bird” joke. Just, Rainbow Quartz. 🌈

💖 The Crystal Gems forming a cheerleading pyramid to form Obsidian and Pearl doing a Swedish Alps move.

💖 That badass fucking shot of Obsidian’s multiple arms. As well as that epic music they played for her scene.

💖 The Crystal Gems’ new forms. Pearl has completely thrown off that flimsy veil thing that all Pearls have. (Which is a symbol of servitude to her.) And now, her outfit is a lot more conventionally human. (Maybe a sign that she wants to pursue Mystery Girl?) Also, the Star is on her back, representing her putting her past as a Crystal Gem behind her. Now, she’s just Pearl and she just wants to live her own chosen purpose.

Garnet has both red and blue in her corset. After Ruby and Sapphire spent time apart, Ruby realized that she liked being with Sapphire while still being herself. Maybe Sapphire came to the same conclusion. Maybe they both came to the conclusion that they’re not two halves of a whole. They’re two whole beings in one pair.

💖 Bismuth loving Connie enough to make her a custom non-Rose Quartz-themed sword. I love how much she loves and protects the new crew.

💖 The Great and Lovable Peridot declaring that she’s Homeworld’s savior.

💖 As unnerving as it is, I love the way White tries to mess with Steven’s head. She talks about Yellow’s, Blue’s and Pink’s impurities making them dependent on each other. (Essentially, colored diamonds are created because of impurities.) And also how Pink surrounds herself with outcasts in order to be considered normal or good. I don’t agree with any of her statements, but you’ll often hear bigots use the same kind of logic to justify their worldview, which really makes this show hit home in many ways. I have to admit, her words kind of messed with my head, too. For a moment, I had some intrusive thoughts, wondering if I believed what I believe so that I could be “the best of the worst”. I snapped out of it really quick, mind you. But this was an incredibly effective speech.

💖 Amethyst calling White a dirt wad. 😂 She has NO chill.

💖 Again, White Diamond being an absolute villain when she says, “Now I’ve removed all their flaws. Now they are perfect, now they are ME.” This could be an interpretation of God. He sees free will as a mistake because his creations choose NOT to glorify him and NOT to be molded in his image. So many awesome sneak-disses of real people in this episode. 😎👏🏼

💖 Yellow Pearl’s silly Pink Steven line turning out to be foreshadowing. 🤦🏻‍♀️

💖 The palpable representation of self-love in the form of Steven adoring his own form. Also, there’s a throwback to Rose Quartz saying, “Every time you love yourself or you love being yourself, that’s me loving you and loving being you.” Steven really is Pink’s ascended form. The song in the credits is from Pink to Steven.

💖 Rose Quartz and Pink being gone for good. So many stories have characters that come back to life and it seems like death loses meaning nowadays. As much as I love Rose, I’m here for her never coming back. Especially because that represents Pink/Rose/Steven growing and moving on. Just as we never go back to our old, naive selves, neither should Pink.

💖 Steven being equal to White in power, apparently. She was shook with that scream of his! And he took his sweet ass time walking towards his meat suit. That’s power right there.

💖 White saying, “I only want you to be yourself and if you can’t do that, I’ll do it for you.” A perfect representation of people nowadays forcing people to deny their true identities through draconian laws, unwritten social codes and bigoted statements.

(“You do not look like this, you do not sound like this, you are Pink Diamond” = “If you have a penis/vagina, you’re a man/woman.” “That gender doesn’t exist.” “Men and women are supposed to be with each other because...reproduction.” “You can live together, but don’t call it marriage.” Etc, etc.)

💖 The best line in the whole show: “I AM a child. What’s your excuse?” What a sweet, heartfelt way to remind us of the pilot episode, when all this magic got started. 😭

💖 White Diamond interpreted Pink’s “impurity” as warmth earlier. All this time, she thought that being “perfect” meant being detached, cold, unsympathetic, overbearing and cruel. But she becomes more likeable and multi-faceted when she absorbs Pink’s warmth/light. Without it, she’s a creepy, aloof puppet master. But with it, she becomes the same old White that the Diamonds loved. She changed quite easily, so that indicates to me that she felt the need to remove her emotions to become a more effective leader. (Kind of like how people with broken hearts often vow never to love again.) There should be a future exploration on this. Did she remove her own emotions? Did she do it in order to detach herself from grieving for Pink? Or did a higher, more eldritch power do this to her? 🤔 Either way, Pink’s warmth is the antidote to all forms of frigidity. For all that guff about her perfect white light penetrating everyone, she sure got shown a thing or two. 😁

💖 Apparently, Pink Pearl is okay-ish. She probably still has the trauma of being taken from Pink and having her eye cracked. But she apparently has no memory of being controlled. I was so tormented for the last month, wondering if poor Pink Pearl was screaming for freedom, trapped inside her own body. 😢

💖 Steven’s throwback to the song he sung to Lars and Sadie when they were stranded on the island. “If you let others just be whoever they are, maybe you could let yourself be whoever you are” is a throwback to “Let Yourself Just Be Wherever You Are”. It’s also a perfect message to people who rely on bigotry and forcefulness to serve as their whole identity.

💖 Sadie’s green hair. 💚 What a look! And Greg is such a good guy that he’s allowed Sadie and her band to play his song. ☺️ Also, her literal mic drop when the Diamond mothership lands above her. 🤣

💖 The way our perfect cinnamon roll always brings people together. The way he introduces the off-colors to the Diamonds like it’s NBD, like there hasn’t been eons of bad blood between them. And the way White is willing to say hello to them first. What a good grandma. ☺️ It’s funny that earlier on, White said that Pink inspires others to be their worst selves. Yet whenever Steven does stuff like this, it inspires me to be my best self. And many other fans too, I’m sure!

💖 Lars being kind to Lion. ☺️

💖 The off-colors and corrupted-now-uncorrupted Gems finally getting their happily ever after. ☺️

💖 Jasper still retaining a scar of her corruption. Because no one ever comes back unscathed and that little detail makes this story so much more real to us. Also, the way Amethyst explained everything to her, even after the way Jasper had bullied her.

💖 Yellow throwing up some deuces as the mothership was blasting off. 😂✌🏼 There is hope for these Diamonds after all.

💖 Steven’s closing song. What a perfect message to sum up the entire episode. 😍

#steven universe #pink diamond #pearl #rose quartz #amethyst #lapis lazuli #yellow diamond #blue diamond #peridot

[devilgem-archive]

heya!! do you mind if i ask a bit abt ur kyokoswap au?? if u dont wanna thats fine but any info/hcs u have abt it wld be cool bc the au seems rlly neat!! tho again if u dont wanna def no pressure ^^; have a wonderful day!! :D

VIBRATES EXCITEDLY i’ve been waiting 50 years for someone to ask about this!!!!!kyoko magica is one my oldest and most developed aus, i’m more than happy to answer this!

aside from minor adjustments to better fit each character’s arc, the story itself follows canon’s exactly! starts with kyoko having a dream about mami, ends with mami tearing apart kyokami in a new world. ofc a lot of the girls’ original traits remain in tact. kyoko is more like her pre-tds self, kind but ditzy and reckless, mami retains her ladylike grace, homura her overprotectiveness and so on…i always prefer leaving aspects that makes characters…themselves in swap aus if u get me? or maybe that’s just me

KYOKO

swaps with madoka. madokyoko or kyokami, as i like to call her!

a simple christian girl with a plain, ordinary life. kyoko had everything she could ever ask for: a loving family, supportive friends, amazing teachers- just everything! all of that changed when she meets a mysterious blonde girl in a post-apocalyptic setting in a dream…and that very same girl appears in her life the very next day!

while she has a kind heart, she is known to be fiery and unreasonable at times. this temper was usually displayed in heated confrontations with mami

the sakuras used to be rather poor. their financial status improved when the akemis stepped in to assist them, and the two families had forged a close bond ever since

eating is practically her hobby. still hates wasting food and will call out anyone who does so

is a d@ddy’s girl through and through. her father is wise and caring, so she often seeks him out for advice

her wish varies from time to time. in the first timeline she wished to save a cat she named Amy, while others had to do with wishing one or all of her friends back or to be able to defeat walpurgisnacht etc. her final wish was to erase all witches from the past,present and future with her own hands, which caused her to ascend to godhood and leave no trace of her existence in the new world.

kyokami felt lonely when she first realized she had no way to get in touch with her loved ones on earth. it felt even strange to be god herself…she’d always been a girl of faith yknow? she eventually embraced her fate as the composer of the universe, and is perfectly happy in bring salvation to magical girls all over the globe.

ophelia is the witch of abandonment. unlike gretchen, who desires to save the world, ophelia wants to destroy it. kyoko’s faith in humanity died the second ophelia was born…and the all-powerful wudan witch stops at nothing until this cold and cruel world is nothing more than barren wasteland

MAMI

switches with homura! her nickname is homumami, but she’s usually mamicifer to me

i like to call her moemami (or moemi???) in her ‘moe’ phase

was orphaned at the age of 6 when a fatal car crash killed her parents and left her paralyzed from waist down. the hospital had practically been her home since, until she was officially discharged yeaaaaars later

used to wear her hair in drilled pigtails, complete with colorful flower clips that surprisingly correspond to her future friends’ colors. in later timelines she would let her hair down and replace the childish clips with her signature bronze ones.

used to be wheelchair bound before contracting. learned to utilize her healing powers so she could walk again; she used crutches and ribbons to assist her during the early timelines. in later timelines, she fully healed her injured spine the same time she changed her personality

she had a big crush on sayaka in the past…something she’d rather forget. it still flusters her

her wish ofc was to redo her meeting with kyoko sakura

her birthday falls on may 1st. more abt it here

mami has a major sweet tooth.

candeloro is a miserable witch, literally shackled with chains of despair, forever alone in this nightmarish prison- her eternal pity party. although she comes off as aloof at first, her true nature warm and inviting, almost needy even.

she has her own set of ‘clara dolls,’ known as delightful dolls. there’s four of them, each resembling the girls of the quartet but represent the hostess’/mami’s worst aspects: vexation (kyoko), disgust (madoka), cruelty (sayaka) and love (homura)– the youngest doll is the least favorite and looks suspiciously a lot like the good-for-nothing’s dolls (see sayamura for the answer)

HOMURA

switches with sayaka. i lovingly dub her sayamura

was kyoko’s friend from childhood. they attended the same catholic elementary school together before mitakihara middle school.

sported her ‘moe’ appearance pre-contract. after making her wish, she ditched the braids and glasses in order to look ‘cooler’ (@ which kyoko wld say she always looked cool in her eyes

kyoko had been her knight in shining armor for as long as she could remember, and homura really wants to repay that by protecting her as well! she is also hella gay for her bff 

her wish was to have the strength to protect others

her shield is very similar to the one seen in the original madoka manga, though it lacks the hammerspace storage. her firearms are formed via magic

her desire for kyoko, self loathing and jealousy are big big factors to her inevitable demise.

homulilly here is a mix of her nutcracker and mortal world forms. each and every one of the clara dolls still exist along with lotte, luiselotte, liese and lillia.

love is in fact, one of homura’s dolls; because homura and mami cherish the same person deeply, their feelings intertwined and therefore ‘share’ ai. post-rebellion, ai continues to pose as one of the delightful dolls and attempts to revive homura’s memories behind mamicifer’s back

SAYAKA

switches with mami. her nickname is mamisayaka here!

ghost and lonely are big inspos,esp for oktavia

came from a rather well off family, so she never really needed to worry about provisions when she was left on her own. still, all the money in the world could never fill the gaping hole in her lonely heart

knows how to play the violin

her parents and kyousuke and hitomi all perished when a theater collapsed on itself. old wounds reopened when madoka left her to live life her own way

is the ideal big sis! cheerful, sporty and has good grades…For A Sayaka. beneath the facade she’s a depressed slob who doesnt take care of herself as much as she should. its oke as long as she hides it all with a smile :)

oktavia von seckendorff is very highkey based off lewis msa; deadbeat-esque familiars, an abandoned mansion/concert hall labyrinth and a disembodied glass heart, which sits at the very bottom of her lagoon- that kind stuff. those she falls in love with, whether romantically or platonically, are never to leave her- she wont be alone, never again. one condition must be fulfilled in order to kill her successfully: stay. if she’s truly feels content, she will accept death without fail.

MADOKA

swaps with kyoko. kyodoka has a nice ring, doesnt it?

used to be exactly like the sweet and well-meaning canon!madoka in the past, a key difference was she would resort to stealing and breaking other rules to keep herself and her parents and little brother alive.

her mother was a businesswoman who wanted to take a more innovative approach to her work. alas, this would cost junko her entire career and the kaname family became penniless

madoka wished for her mother’s dream project to become reality. just as ur familiar with canon!kyoko’s story, it backfired horribly. disowned from her family, her mother became an alcoholic, dad gets pushed around and baby tatsuya doesnt understand whats going on. days later…press f for the kanames and madoka’s broken heart.

is vile, absolutely vile. can be sweet in one moment then violent and emotionally manipulative in the next like the two-faced bitch she is

rarely uses honorifics to address people anymore, unless she’s playing sweet to get something out of someone. uses ‘-chan/kun/san’ for those she sincerely cares for; she didn’t call homura ‘-chan’ before she began sympathizing with the latter

has a minor problem with booze and tobacco, namely the latter.

she loves loves loves melons!

knowing the value of being frugal, madoka hates wasting things that could be put to better use. she can be kind of a cheapskate in some sense, though she's sane enough to avoid resorting to ridiculous extremities.

kriemhild gretchen is exact the opposite of canon!ophelia. this towering witch continues oh so obsessively reaching for what she cannot; that one faraway glimmer of hope sitting at the endless skies of her labyrinth she calls paradise. shes stubborn as all hell, and will not let herself be destroyed UNLESS one convinces her the world is already a happy place in no need of saving

NAGISA

nagisa is nagisa.

the same charlotte that ate mamisayaka’s head is now a bapy that lives with her post-rebellion

her wish remains the same: to have one last cheesecake with her mother

not much to say here

thats all i can remember from the top of my head! if you want me to elaborate further, pls ask me @mahoutrauma!! 

#pmmm #askies #anon #kyokoswap au #trash aus #headcanons #if only i put effort in my writing assignments as i did with this

[thatwitchrevan]

Okay so here’s my general impression of Endgame, aka what I liked and didn’t like. This post has ALL the spoilers (or at least a lot of them.)

Things I didn’t like:

Carol’s parts in the movie were way too brief. I understand this movie was mainly about sending off the original Avengers but I really thought there’d be more Carol!!!

I also wanted more Valkyrie.

Steve’s ending was...not at all satisfying to me. Seeing him as an old man was jarring and the way they did the scene felt cheesy and if they expected me to be happy about him going back to live with Peggy I’m...not. It’s not that I don’t like Peggy but I literally haven’t been invested in their relationship since the end of The First Avenger. At least not romantically. Steve’s scenes with Peg in Civil War were good and I was heartbroken when she died. I like her as a character. But I’m so far from convinced that she was the great love of Steve’s life that he was always meant to be with. If that’s the case why wasn’t there more than a literally five seconds foreshadowing that he’d go back? I liked the scene where he saw her in shield hq and they should’ve left it at that.

Because here’s the thing. Not only has Peggy not been upheld as The Significant Person in Steve’s life, but he has other people that are right there in 2023 that he should give a second thought to. All the surviving Avengers, for one, but particularly Bucky and Sam. You’re telling me Steve loves Peggy SOOOOO much after not seeing her for over a decade and not having been in a relationship with her for much longer, that he would abandon his best friends without ever telling them he wasn’t coming back, RIGHT AFTER they had just come back from the dead and he’d mourned them for five years??? really??? nah absolutely not. There isn’t any way in hell Steve Rogers would ditch his best friends for his ex like that. Are you kidding me. I hate it. 

Natasha?????? Didn’t get??? a funeral??? SHE SHOULD HAVE A STATUE. A MEMORIAL. She sacrificed herself for a CHANCE to save the world and she gets nothing except a few solemn words between Avengers? why didn’t they at least give her and Tony a joint funeral are you fucking kidding me all the same people could’ve come. 

Don’t tell me Fury wouldn’t speak at Nat’s funeral. AND CLINT. AIUDNUDNAUIDND

The fact that instead of resetting the timeline (which I understand why they couldn’t do that) they brought everyone back five years later with all the consequences of millions of people disappearing from existence temporarily is fucking with my head and given the way everything was handled in this movie I highly doubt it’s going to be satisfyingly addressed in future ones. Like listen - May lived without Peter FOR FIVE YEARS. That’s just an example.

I’m really really really sad they didn’t bring Loki and our original Gamora and Vision back. They didn’t even really discuss it. Thor said NOTHING about wanting his brother back. I don’t even think he said he missed him?? We spent this whole hiatus thinking about if and how those characters might also be revived and Endgame gave only the barest shrug in response to those questions and hopes. Those characters’ stories got NOTHING satisfying to tie them up. I’m so disappointed.

The fact that Nat didn’t get to see the massive team up at the end makes me emo.

Things I liked:

Morgan Stark is absolutely precious and I love her and I too would tell all the Avengers to fuck off and let the world continue to burn in order to protect her.

Seriously I haven’t been able to get over the fact that they gave Tony and Pepper a beautiful baby girl. The pure happiness I felt when realizing that TONY HAD A CHILD was...unparalleled. I literally cannot. He loves her SO MUCH. He wanted her SO MUCH. He wanted to be a dad, and a good one. and he was. He was the best dad. i’m crying. 

“I love you 3000″

Morgan is an absolute angel 

NAT NAT NAT my baby my love

she’s so fucking sad the whole time. her expression when they killed Thanos and realized there was nothing left to do destroyed me. And post time skip??? her crying over her sandwich and smiling at Steve with ALL the sadness in the world in her eyes and trying to keep up with being an Avenger even though it kind of feels like there’s no point anymore, because she HAS to? you can see her survivor’s guilt. She knows the world’s already ended and she’s one of the ones who has to go one. She knows her best friend lost his family and is out there losing himself too. She knows half of her family is never coming back. I can’t handle how sad she is or how strong she is for going on anyway. She’s amazing.

and it KILLS me that she died but if it had to happen I’m glad it was the way she wanted. she saved the world one more time.

Bruce was so good the whole time. I love seeing him and Hulk coexist, I love his nearly ever-present sweet little smile, how much he appreciates what and who he still has, how he’s still trying to be optimistic. Bruce has been through a lot, including suicidal depression, and here he is doing his goddamn best and SMILING. I’m just?? so proud and I love him he’s come so far.

I love all the tender little moments??? Nebula and Tony playing tabletop football (and the way he very calmly, non-judgmentally says ‘you don’t have to do that’ when she thinks it’s a fight at first) and taking care of each other (she lets him have the rations?? covers him with a blanket?? is this fanfic that I wrote in my dreams??); Bruce reminding Thor how he helped him when he was in a bad place (and his goddamn smile when he says it, so full of love and care?? Bruce adores him and just wants to help him I cry); Steve trying to cheer Nat up and them just being friends; Rhodey and Nat being buddies and looking out for each other; Rocket and Nebula holding hands; Tony crushing Peter in a hug; Carol meeting Peter and giving this kid she just met a smile and their whole exchange...I could go on. Just Avengers being friends and loving each other and being wholesome and overwhelmingly platonic?? aijdnauidnhuadn

And also painful as fuck like see: the ENTIRE scene between Nat and Clint before she throws herself off. Particularly the forehead rest and how they go right into fighting each other (again). THEY’RE BEST FRIENDS AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH.

Thor talking to Frigga again was???? Everything. I love them both so much. Especially how she told him to stop being who he’s supposed to be and be who he is.

Also the fact that Korg and Miek and Brunnhilde are still there for Thor even after five years of being in a Depression Cave? amazing. 

Nebula is so important. My love for Nebula has grown with every one of her appearances and this movie gave me so much of what I wanted for her....character growth, making new friends, tender/ funny scenes, getting to see her relax. Her reaction banter with Rhodey was great to see. Just the fact that she’s loosened up enough and learned to trust enough to joke with these people and be friendly with them, even if she is still Nebula about it......im love her. And she genuinely became an Avenger like she was just as determined to fix things as the others and she didn’t hesitate to shoot alt Nebula to protect Gamora. She’s fucking perfect lots more Nebula please.

Let’s talk about the big fight scene. 

as soon as I heard “on your left” i was freaking THE FUCK out.

Sam is a dramatic magnificent man and I love him. 

and Steve!

guys he finally fucking said it

they assembled guys

ALL of them 

(except nat)

jainkjandknadkjandkjandkjadn 

and my FAVORITE part of the Battle was Wanda

She went ALL OUT on Thanos and I just enjoyed it so so so much

Carol was also amazing and I think I ascended when she took that headbutt without a flinch...without even blinking...GODDESS

and the team up?? “don’t worry, she has help” I DIED Y’ALL 

for a moment I was in badass female character heaven where all was right in the world

Rescue was particularly awesome I’ve been waiting for that for YEARS and she was AMAZING

And seeing Shuri, Okoye, and Valkyrie acting as Avengers was!! good shit

and alright I’m heartbroken that Tony died but again, it was the way I would’ve wanted him to go. He saved the world one more time! and at least I got to see him with a fucking infinity gaunlet

watching Thanos die not once but twice was. extremely satisfying.

SAM. IS. FUCKING. CAPTAIN. AMERICA. (no not like that. I mean also like that but. you know what I mean.)

a lack of end credits scenes is the best way to pour salt in the wounds of me.

but I did cry at original Avengers bit of the credits. particularly Scarlet and Robert’s.

#marvel #avengers spoilers #endgame spoilers #avengers #engame #griffin watches things