#we did end up getting food from my fave place and i have leftovers for tomorrow | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blazedgraysons · 3 years

Note

babe can u bless us w some new years smut w papi gray ?

oml i’m sorry it took me so long to finish this but of course, angel!! lmaoo let’s start the new year out with some hate sex with gray.

warnings: so i guess the words papi gray triggered something in me because i don’t really know what this is anymore. anyways hatefucking, a smidge of choking, some dirty talk and the return of my fave: cocky fuckboy grayson. anyways hope you like it bby <333

New Year’s had never been your favorite holiday. Too many blacked-out people in a bar, all with high hopes for the year that come quickly crashing down the next day along with their hangovers. Plus, it doesn’t help that you’ve been puked on two NYEs in a row.

It wasn’t like you had a personal vendetta against the holiday, just the older you got, the more you wanted to spend New Years' at home. So you ended up creating your own traditions: Indian food, shitty beer, and rewatching your favorite chick flicks.

This is why you were so surprised to find yourself outside of a huge party this year. Your two best friends had dragged you with them, explaining how they didn’t want to ring in New Year’s without you.

“I look like a disco ball.” You groan as the three of you walk in, Ali and Stella confidently leading the way.

“You look hot.” Ali assures, smiling in what you figure is supposed to be a comforting way. She had been the one to invite the two of you tonight, and a part of you feels bad for your miserable attitude, knowing that she just wanted to spend time with you.

“Warning: Dolan at 3 O’Clock.” Your other friend, Stella, whispers into her red solo cup, and you can feel your bad mood return. Turning your head slightly, you can see Grayson Dolan walking in with his entourage, already acting as if he owns the room.

You can hear Ali snapping at Stella, reminding her how they agreed not to point him out tonight, but all you can focus on is how arrogant Grayson looked.

The two of you had never gotten along, a wrong first date leaving each other permanently on the other’s shit list. Despite your disdain for another, the two of you ran in the same friend group, so you saw each other more often than you like. At this point, everyone knew to keep you two far away from each other unless they wanted a whole night of insults, fighting, and yelling.

“Remind me why you two hate each other again? It’s been like two years.” Stella asks nonchalantly, tilting her head as she holds up her drink.

“We just do. He was a dick on our date. Some people aren’t meant to get along.”

“Aw, you two just need to kiss and makeup.” Ali coos, fixing your hair.

“More like fuck and makeup. So what if you had a bad date. The two of you still have this weird sex thing that needs to be figured out.” Stella interjects.

“I do not-“ Your friends start laughing at your loud objection, watching as your face grows hot in embarrassment.

“I do not want to fuck him!” You hiss, hiding your face from nosy onlookers.

“Why not? I would; he’s fucking hot.” Stella whispers, gesturing over to him. All three of you look over at where he’s standing against the kitchen counter, laughing loudly with his group of friends.

You hated to admit it, but she was right: he really was super attractive. He’s simply dressed in jeans and a black t-shirt, denim jacket finishing everything off. It’s nothing special, but you hate the fact that he still somehow managed to look better than everyone else here.

He looks over, smirking when he sees your little group staring at him. All three of you turn away, doing a horrible job at trying to look inconspicuous. Your back is turned towards him as you fix your hair and smoothing out your dress. Ali’s eyes light up suddenly, and she’s whispering to Stella before turning back to you.

“Stella has to pee; we’ll be right back.” She rushes out while dragging Stella to the nearest bathroom. Before you can protest, Grayson’s taking their spot.

He’s chewing his gum obnoxiously, and you can’t help the way your eyes focus on how his jaw moves with every bite.

“Didn’t think I’d see you here tonight, Y/N.”

“Yeah, I was just leaving. Decided it’s not really for me anymore.” You get out, moving past him to walk to the door. You figured you can just call an Uber and text your two friends you were feeling sick. Before you can make it past, he grabs your arm to stop you.

“C’mon, it’s the last day of the year. Can’t you be nice to me just for tonight?” He asks, eyes shining with mischief.

“ Don’t you have some other girl to mess with?” You yank your wrist back, walking off as he follows you.

“Why? You jealous.” He asks, and you know that arrogant smirk is painted on his face.

“Over you? Hardly.” You keep moving until he says something that has you stopping in your tracks.

“Did you wear that dress for me tonight?” Your jaw clenches, annoyance washing over your body. However, you figure two can play this game, so you turn around, walking towards him with a flirtatious expression on your face. He’s looking down at you, appreciating the way your attitude has done a complete 180. You wrap your arms around his neck and bring his face towards yours, leaning in as if you’re going to kiss him.

“Fuck you.” You whisper, mouth millimeters away from his. You turn away, turning to look at him over your shoulder one last time. The irritated expression on his face and his clenched jaw should’ve warned you that you were playing with fire. Still, you simply keep walking forward, choosing to look for Ali and Stella.

Maybe you could stay a little longer to see how this plays out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fuck Grayson Dolan.

At this point, you weren’t sure if you were angrier at him or if you actually wanted to fuck him.

All you know is he was pushing every last button.

It started with constant flirting - just with everyone else besides you. You knew Grayson was a tease, but you swore he had given every girl at this party his signature charming smile. The one that screamed, 'I'm Grayson Dolan, and you're the only one here for me.' You had pretended like you hadn’t seen red when he leaned down to whisper a joke in some girl's ear, winking at you when he notices the way your eyes had narrowed and your lips were puckered.

It only got worse when he decided he needed a refill on his drink, coming up to where you were standing in the hallway. He slyly placed his hands low on your waist, pressing up against you to squeeze by even though you both knew that there was more than enough space.

You were in the middle of debating on whether or not you should finally leave for good this time, figuring you shouldn’t have to subject yourself to this torture when you still have leftover takeout in your fridge.

“Hey, we need to talk to you. Can you meet us in the upstairs bedroom in like 5 minutes?” Ali appears out of nowhere, blonde curls messed up as if she’s been running her hands nervously through her hair. Stella just nods casually, and you look at the two of them suspiciously.

“What are you two planning?” You ask.

“Nothing! Upstairs. Five minutes!” Ali assures, kissing you on the cheek before walking off again. You can tell she’s drunk, smelling the lingering vodka shots on her breath. However, curiosity gets the better of you, and after five minutes, you’re slowly walking up the stairs.

“Ali? Stel?” You call out, getting nothing in response. You keep walking until you reach the end of the hallway, closed door in front of you. You open it, greeted with the sight of Grayson in front of you.

“What the fuck?” You both exclaim, the door closing behind you. You jangle the door handle, cursing under your breath when you realize it’s locked.

“We’re not letting you out until you guys kiss!” Ali calls out.

“You guys got 20 minutes until midnight.” Stella laughs, both still holding the door tightly to keep you from breaking through.

“Oh my God, we’re not fucking 12. This isn’t 7 minutes in heaven.”

“Less talking, more frenching!” Ali yells, giggling loudly as her heels slowly click away.

You roll your eyes, “You two are the fucking worst.” You kick the door before sliding down against it, tilting your head against the door.

“Your friends are weird.” are the first words out of Grayson’s mouth, and you roll your eyes.

“They mean well, they’re just really … stupid sometimes.”You get back up to your feet and start knocking on the door, hitting it with your palms, anything that could hopefully get a passerby’s attention.

“Can you stop banging on the door? It’s annoying.” Grayson mumbles out from where he’s sitting up on the bed after five minutes of your obnoxious knocking.

“I’m sorry, did you want to spend New Year’s locked in here with one another. I’m trying to get out.”

He leans back down on the bed, covering his eyes with his arms. “You realize it’s locked; we’re stuck in here. No one’s coming up here for a while.”

You hate to admit it, but you know he’s right. With only 20 minutes until midnight, everyone’s going to be downstairs, not wanting to miss the main event. You walk over to the dresser, sitting on top of it as you pull out your phone to find someone to text for an emergency rescue.

“We really should just sleep with one another.”

You nearly drop your phone in your lap from his sudden outburst. “I think that’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard.”

“Why not? I think you’re hot; I know you think I’m hot. Stop- don’t try to argue with me; I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I’m not paying attention. Let’s just get this over with; clear start to 2021.” He looks over at you, raising an eyebrow.

You roll your eyes, “I’m not sleeping with you Grayson.”

“What, scared you might actually like it?” He pushes himself up off the mattress and stalks over to where you’re seated on top of the dresser. You start to feel uncharacteristically timid, not knowing how to react under his dark gaze. You don’t say anything, just watching the way his eyes rake over your entire body slowly.

He takes a deep breath, “If I kiss you right now, will you let me?” You wait a second before throwing on caution to the wind, and nodding, deciding to give in to whatever tension is growing between you.

He leans down, softly kissing you before coming back to gauge your reaction.

“If you kiss anything like the way you fuck, this is gonna fucking suck.” You whisper, smiling at the way his face drops. He pulls you into him, forcing his lips onto yours roughly. It’s messy, teeth clashing into one another, noses bumping, and you love it. You didn’t want softness, you didn’t want intimacy, you wanted Grayson to let out everything he felt towards you.

He starts to roughly mark down your neck, leaving dark marks, and you whimper, desperately pulling his jacket off his shoulders. He leans back slightly, pulling his shirt over his head and your mouth falls slightly. You take in all the deep contours and ridges, not even missing the way he flexes briefly.

“Like what you see?” He rasps out, pants growing tighter at your open arousal.

“Just because we’re fucking doesn’t mean I’m another one of your fans. I still fucking hate you.” You pull your dress off and spread your legs slightly on the dresser. You mentally thank Ali for forcing you to skip wearing a bra because the way Grayson’s face zeros in on your bare tits has you whimpering softly. He moves even closer to you.

“Doesn’t seem like you hate me right now.” He whispers, eyes darkening at the dark spot growing on your underwear. His arms are on either side of your thighs as he’s standing in between your legs. You can feel the heat coming off from his body, close enough that you can pick up the subtle nerves in his energy under waves of excitement.

“Whatever.” You’re trying your hardest to remain unaffected, calm under his intense gaze. Still, between the lack of touch and the way he’s looking like he can’t figure out how he wants to ruin you first, you start to squirm.

He pulls roughly at your underwear; you watch as his biceps bulge until the fabric falls apart in his hands. Whatever facade of calmness you were trying to maintain flies out the window. You swallow deeply, eyes wide as he tosses the ruined underwear over his shoulder with a cocky smirk. The smug look on his face is enough for you to snap back to normal and return to your usual backtalk.

“Watch it, asshole. Those aren’t cheap.”

“Trust me, I’ll buy you two more to make up for it. Now shut up; you talk too much.” With that, he’s leaning down and sucking your clit hard.

You’re not quick to compliment Grayson, but you can admit he’s incredible at eating pussy. He genuinely sounds like he’s ready to die in between your legs, quietly groaning to himself with every suck and lick. Your breath hitches at the imagery, and he’s slowly licking up your slit, savoring the way you taste for him. He gives you a few more licks before he starts sucking at your clit again, and you can feel yourself growing closer.

“Fuck, Gray- I’m about to cu-“ Before you can finish, he’s pulling away and smiling up at you with shiny lips.

“Fuck you.” You practically spit out, and he just laughs shortly, amusement barely hidden in his face.

“Before I make you cum, I wanna hear you ask nicely.” He’s leaning into you again, lips hovering yours, mirroring the same position you had him in earlier. You push his shoulder, hoping to give you some distance, but he stays firmly planted in place.

“If you think I’m gonna beg for your sorry excuse of a dick -“

He cuts you off, fingers slipping inside you, and he starts curling his fingers, your back arching into his touch. With how close you were to your orgasm, you’re falling apart in a matter of seconds. You start whimpering out his name, and he stills all his movements, thumb hovering over your clit.

“Beg.” He demands, and neither of you misses the way you tightly clench around him from the change of tone in his voice.

You stare at him long until he lightly brushes your clit, reminding you of what you’re missing in your stubbornness. You sigh dramatically before swallowing your pride and saying:

“Grayson, fuck me.” He stares at you pointedly, and you sigh again.

“Please, Gray. Want you to fuck me, please.” You whisper. It’s not a lot, but he knows that’s probably the most he’s going to get out of you at this moment, so he just smiles proudly and starts moving his fingers again. The coil in your stomach starts to grow tighter, and your toes curl when you start cumming all of your fingers. You cry out, nails scratching down his stomach as he continues to move his hand to work you through your orgasm.

He leans back, sucking up everything on his fingers before unbuckling and taking his pants and underwear off. You were glad he had made you cum before because he was big, bigger than anyone you’ve ever been with before. He brushes his dick over your entrances a few times, tapping his dick lightly on your clit. You whimper slightly, and he winks, arrogant persona back in full force.

“You’re still a dick.” You whisper, no real sting to your words.

“Yeah, I know.” He strokes his dick lightly before sinking in, and both of you moan out from the initial feeling.

He starts snapping his hips relentlessly, not giving you time to adjust to his pace. Your eyes begin to roll back, only able to focus on the wood digging into your back, arm wrapped around your waist, and dick ramming roughly into you. You’re moaning out constantly, nothing able to come to mind to express how good he’s making you feel.

However, Grayson is starting to get frustrated, not satisfied with the way you’ve laid out in front of him. He picks you up, holding you close to him before dropping you carelessly on the bed. Before you can say anything, he’s twisting your body around, so you’re on all fours in front of him and is sliding back into you, taking you from behind. You’re arching underneath him, allowing him to reach you even deeper as you moan out. He’s practically fucking you into the mattress, and from your constant sounds and ass jiggling in front of him, he’s releasing a guttural groan.

He places an arm next to your head while wrapping a large hand around your throat, lightly cutting off your air. His body is entirely over yours, encasing your entire body in his large frame. It all starts to get to be too overwhelming, and your mind starts to go blank from the pleasure, pulling at the railings to get away from how hard he’s fucking into you while also leaning back into him to get more.

“Stop running; thought you wanted to see how good I can fuck you.” He moves his hand to slap your ass, and his dick jumps from the way you start squeezing around him. He rubbing your ass, ready to spank you again, when the both of you stop from loud screams coming below you. You both hear yells about countdowns and New Year’s and Grayson’s leaning down, rutting himself into you before whispering in your ear -

“How much you wanna bet I can get you to cum before midnight?”

10!

You didn’t think he could go any faster, but his movements pick up, hitting your g-spot with every movement of his hips.

He brushes his fingers against your lip, watching as you slowly take them into your mouth and start sucking. You don’t miss the way he lightly swears when you lightly nip at the pads of his fingers. “Fucking brat.” He mutters before he’s wrapping his hand around your throat again.

He moves his hand, going back up on his knees so he can hold you still as he keeps thrusting into you.

With the way he’s gripping your hips and pulling you back into him, you already know you’re gonna be bruised with his fingerprints on your hip tomorrow.

You start to fall forward, and all you can think about is how badly you want to cum.

He starts rubbing at your clit, and you swear you can feel him deep in your stomach, knowing that he’s going to be responsible for your limp tomorrow.

“If only I knew earlier that all I needed to do to get you to shut up was to fuck you properly” were the words coming out, and you hate yourself for moaning out louder at the way he says it.

You can tell he’s starting to get close by the way he starts slowing down, choosing to grind his hips slowly into you.

You haven’t stopped moaning, volume picking up until you’re practically sobbing into the pillow. You briefly think how grateful you are for the screaming in the living room when Grayson smacks your ass hard before groaning in your ear, “Fucking cum, Y/N.”

The tight feeling in your stomach snaps, and a small spurt of wetness releases, you squirting into his dick and thighs. You practically collapse forward, suddenly exhausted, and it only takes a few more thrusts before Grayson’s pulling out to cum on your lower back.

Happy New Year’s, Y/N.” He whispers in a cocky tone, pride in how he practically has you reduced to nothing underneath him.

He covers you in a blanket before getting dressed and walking back out to the party, not even bothering to hide his self-satisfied smirk when his friends ask him why he missed the ball drop.

#cole write something under 1k challenge #sorry this took forever #grayson dolan #grayson dolan smut #grayson dolan drabble #grayson dolan blurb #grayson dolan x reader #grayson dolan x reader smut #dolan twins #dolan twins smut #dolan twins drabble #dolan twins blurb #dolan twins x reader #dolan twins x reader smut #blazedwritings

301 notes · View notes

apriorisea · 4 years

Note

Angst with yoongi or jungkook. Their girlfriend having a hard time but they didn't think it was smt serious so they weren't there for her and just focusing on work. She didn't say anything to them, just trying to deal with it alone but it's just keep getting worse. She lose some weight, always tired and not so cheerful like before. Eventually they realize it when she faint in their arms (i am sorry it's really long i hope you write smt like that, you are one of my fave writers 👍💜)

--Hi! As usual 😅I apologize that this took so long! Thank you so much for the idea and for your sweet compliments---I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it! I hope you enjoy 💕💜

“The Problem”You x Yoongi

“You really didn’t have to do this,” you say, smiling as you lean across the center console to kiss Yoongi’s cheek. Your smile grows bigger as you see the pleased expression cross his face and add: “But I’m really glad you did.” He turns his head and kisses you firmly. “I love you,” he says softly. “I’ll take any chance I can to be with you.” He rests his hand on the back of your neck, playfully holding you in place. “In fact, why don’t you just blow off work today, come with me instead?” You groan, leaning into his arm and brushing your lips against the inside of his wrist. “Don’t tempt me.” He smiles. “I’m sorry I can’t pick you up tonight. Do you want me to send someone?” “No.” You lean forward to ask for another kiss, smiling when he gives you what you want. “I’ll just see you at home tonight. Try not to stay too late, okay?” When he smiles an agreement, you give him a wink and climb out of the car. “Love you!” You’re still smiling when you enter the building, and just before you settle in at your desk, you pull out your phone: This was a terrible idea…you better just come back and get me ;) His answer comes just as you are opening your email: Perfect. Let’s just drive and drive and drive, yeah? Two seconds later, he adds: I LOVE YOU. Grinning, you don’t even read the title of the email before you open it. The happy mood evaporates immediately. It’s 8:32am on a Monday morning, and your boss is already fuming. The project you and your team had put together had apparently not met his expectations and the deadline to turn in a new, better proposal was by the end of the day. Feeling your stomach twist into knots, you turn to scan the office for your coworkers—meeting the eyes of one of them, you exchange nervous looks. It’s going to be a long day.

“He’s just not going to be happy with any of this,” Coworker #2 says, tipping back in his seat irritably. “None of it.” Another team member, Coworker #3, pushes a strand of hair back behind her ear. “That’s a cheerful outlook, thank you.” “You know the mood he’s been in lately,” he says darkly. “This feels like a head hunt.” Glancing at your watch, you struggle to catch your breath. It was 1:36pm and the three of you had been working for hours on a new project proposal. 25 minutes ago the boss had sent a warning email, his tone none the happier. “What do you mean a head hunt?” He throws his arms in the air exasperatedly. “You know, like, looking to fire someone to get over his bad mood.” Your other coworker slaps his arm. “Stop it!” she says, genuinely angry. “You don’t know anything about anything. He’s not going to fire anyone over this stupid project!” The door clicks shut as the fourth and final member of your team walks in, holding a coffee cup. “He knows enough,” he says, sipping his drink. “Word on the street is that we need to downsize and almost anyone could be the target.” Your anxiety increases at his presence and arrogant words. “He’s not going to fire a whole team over a minor-level project,” you say coolly. He fixes you with a look. “You’re right. All he needs is one scapegoat.” Taking a deep breath to stay calm, you give him a look. “Well then, let’s spend more time working and less time talking, huh?” He eyes you but doesn’t respond, slinking slowly into his seat. Your attention is soon turned to other matters, but you never really lose the pit of nerves that his words had opened. It sits there, festering like an open wound, demanding your attention even when you refuse. By the end of the work day, you are exhausted, mentally and physically, and by the time you reach your apartment, you are an anxious mess: the inside of your lower lip is raw from the constant worried chewing and your head is pounding from the stress. As you climb the stairs to your apartment, you think about the day: your team had managed to complete a rough draft for the new project proposal just in time, and, though he wasn’t thrilled, your boss had agreed to give you the rest of the week to complete it. You bite down on your lower lip again. It’s not terrible, but it’s also not great. Reaching your front door, you’re suddenly frozen by the sound of your coworker’s words echoing in your mind: “All he needs is one scapegoat.” Your stomach twists and you force another deep breath before you can open the door. Stepping out of your shoes, you drop your bag to the ground and survey the apartment: there’s a basket of laundry sitting in the corner of the living room, waiting to be done, and a few dishes still in the sink. Releasing a slow, even breath, you try to let the familiarity of home calm you down. The team had worked straight through lunch, and you vaguely realized that part of the reason your hands were shaking was because you hadn’t eaten since your piece of toast this morning for breakfast. You open a cupboard door, but as soon as your eyes land on the coffee mugs, your heart races as you hear it again: One scapegoat. You trusted that particular coworker about as far as you could throw him, and the two of you had been at odds constantly lately. I wouldn’t put anything past him, you think, and your stomach lurches. You shut the cupboard and head for the sink. Sick of hearing your own thoughts, you turn on the TV after you’d finished the dishes and settle in to fold some laundry, trying not to think about the gaping hole of worry eating its way through your stomach. I just have to do the best, you think. I have to be the best member of the team. Then I’m untouchable. Halfway through the basket of laundry, you hear the door unlock. Yoongi comes in, looking slightly disheveled though his frown fades at the sight of you. “Hi sweetheart,” he says quietly, lining his shoes up next to yours carefully. “Here, I’ll finish that. I meant to do it last night.” He presses a kiss to the top of your head and joins you on the floor, reaching for the shirt in your hands. His presence washes over you and you take a truly deep breath. “It’s okay,” you say, tipping your head over to rest on his shoulder. “How was your day?” He sighs, and there’s so much in that simple sound that you forget all about your terrible day and turn to look at him. “What’s going on?” you ask softly, reaching up to smooth a strand of his hair back. “Long day. Taehyungie’s having a hard time lately, Jimin’s back is giving him problems…Namjoon has a bad case of writer’s block and we still need 4 more songs to even make a mini-album.” He folds the shirt and stacks it carefully on top of the others, then reaches for another. “We’re not sure if we can make the Australian tour happen.” “Oh no,” you sympathize. “How come?” “Venue availability, travel….basically everything.” He pauses in between shirts to rub his forehead tiredly. You kiss his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I know how important that tour is to you guys. I’m sure something will work out!” The laundry now finished, he sighs again and sits back against the couch. Reaching out to pull you into his arms, he kisses your temple. “We’re going to figure it out,” he agrees. “But I’m going to be working a lot these next few days. Probably into the weekend,” he adds, waiting for your reaction. You cuddle against him. “It’s okay, baby. Do what you need to do.” “I love you,” he says softly, tipping your chin up so he can kiss you. “How was your day? Have you eaten already?” The question knocks the wind from you. “Oh. It was fine. I…I already ate, yeah. Sorry.” You push out of his arms so he can’t feel the way your heart races at the lie. “Do you want me to make something?” “Nope.” He gets to his feet. “We still have leftovers from last night. I’ll just have those. What did you have?” You stack the folded laundry back in the basket and ignore the question. “I forgot about the leftovers. Hope they still taste good.” “There’s a lot left,” he calls from the kitchen. “I’ll pack some up and you can take it for lunch tomorrow.” You feel your stomach squirm. “Thanks.” You push the laundry basket back into the corner and cross your arms over your stomach, watching him as he moved around the kitchen, reheating his leftovers and packing yours for lunch tomorrow. Tomorrow. You think of your boss’ anger, the work left to do, your coworker’s sinister intent……Your hands go cold. Yoongi brings his food into the living room, sitting on the couch and gesturing to the spot next to him. Some of the feeling returns to your fingers as you climb up next to him, curling up close and resting your head on his shoulder. “Next week,” he says in-between bites. “We’re going to have date night every night for the whole week.” You smile, grateful for the way his presence and words melt your icy worry. “That sounds amazing.” “I mean it,” he insists around a mouth full of food. “Every night. We’ll go to that movie, get dinner at all of our favorite places, stay home and finish our show, go for a drive…anything we want to do. Anything you want to do.” Turning your head to kiss his shoulder again, you say quietly, “I love you, Yoongi.” He finishes eating quickly, hopping up to rinse his dish off and returning to you quickly. Through a yawn, he asks, “Are you ready for bed?” With your mind so full of worry, you hadn’t been looking forward to a whole night of tossing and turning, but when he extends his hand to you, you realize everything would be okay. Putting your hand in his, you nod. “Yes.” When you’re both settled in bed, he wraps his arms around you, pulling you back against his chest. Leaning down to kiss your neck, he rests his head against yours gently. “So I’m thinking one night we get burgers,” he murmurs, his lips brushing your ear. “Pizza for our Netflix night…” “Mmm.” You close your eyes, letting his soothing voice lull you into a calm. “We definitely need to do sushi one night.” “Agreed. For our big fancy date night, let’s go to that nice restaurant with the giant steaks!” You can’t help but laugh at his enthusiasm. “Whatever you want to do. I just want to spend time with you.” He hugs you close. “I love you, sweetheart. Sleep tight, okay?” And with him there to keep you safe and push the worries away, you actually do.

The next morning, you hear him get up extra early, but you’re too exhausted to stir. Before he leaves, he kisses your forehead gently. “Have a good day, sweetheart,” he whispers, and then he’s gone. Your alarm goes off at the usual time, but when you pull your phone to you, you see a screen full of texts. Feeling your stomach lurch, you scan through them: 11 of them are from your coworkers, already panicked about the project. 1 of them is from your bank, reminding you that your payment for student loans was due next week. You set your phone down, heart pounding, and try not to panic. You wish Yoongi were still home. But he was already gone, so you roll out of bed, get ready as quickly as possible, and force yourself to answer a few texts as you head to the kitchen for breakfast. After a little bit of coordination, you and two of your coworkers have a plan for the day—the third one (the problematic one) hadn’t responded yet. Just as you open your fridge to hunt for some food, you get a private message from your closest coworker: Watch out for SJ, she wrote. I’ve heard he was talking about you the other day during lunch. Your stomach flips. I knew it. You shut the fridge hard, ignoring the ache in your guts. Pulling on your coat, you grab your bag and take a small breath. You wouldn’t let him get you today. As you leave the house, you pull out your phone and send Yoongi a text: Is it just me, or is this the most Monday-feeling Tuesday ever??? You’re about to tuck the phone back into your pocket when it buzzes. Eagerly awaiting your boyfriend’s message, you look at the screen expectantly— And find another text from your coworkers. It brings you back to earth immediately. Your stomach is in knots all the way to the office.

“Just as long as her name is on it,” your coworker says dramatically, his voice clearly too loud to be a whisper. Steeling yourself, you look up from your computer. “My name is on what?” “Section 5,” he says unabashedly. “What’s wrong with section 5?” He raises an eyebrow. “Isn’t it obvious?” “Stop being such an ass,” Coworker #2 interrupts, rolling his eyes. “What’s the problem?” The Problem sighs. “Section 5 is the epitome of what was wrong with the last proposal.” “According to who?” Your hands are balled into fists in your lap, hidden away from sight. “The boss, obviously.” “Oh, he told you that? Personally?” You stand your ground. “Last I knew, he didn’t even remember your name.” His cheeks flush. “It was obvious. So I just want to make sure that your name is on it, so he knows who to credit when this falls apart.” “It’s not going to fall apart!” interjects Coworker #3, smoothing her frazzled hair back into a ponytail. “Don’t even put that into the universe!” “You’re welcome to re-work it,” says Coworker #2. “You clearly have the time,” you add coolly. The Problem doesn’t answer, pretending to suddenly be preoccupied with something on his phone. The tenuous silence returns. The four of you work until lunch time—until 5 minutes before official lunch time, actually, because if you had to spend even 5 more minutes in the same room as him, you were going to murder someone—and as you put your laptop to sleep, you realize how hungry you are. “Here,” Coworker #2 drops a packet of pretzels on your desk. “You like these, right?” You nod. “Thanks.” He gives a faint smile, reaching his arms above his head in a huge stretch. “Don’t let him get to you,” he adds, jerking his head towards the door after The Problem. “He sees you as a threat because you are the most competent person in the whole department.” You smile. “I’m trying. But this is just more motivation to get this project sorted—then I can go back to ignoring his existence.” Coworker #2 laughs and reaches out to fist-bump you. “Amen,” he agrees, then grabs his empty-coffee mug off the table and leaves. Feeling a little lighter now that the you have the room to yourself, you open the packet of pretzels as your stomach growls. You manage to eat 7 before your phone goes off. Coworker #3: SJ’s going to eat lunch with the Exec Crew today. Such a suck-up. You set the packet of pretzels down and reply: Is the boss going? Coworker #3: Of course. He’s probably going to offer to pay and everything. The weight settles over your shoulders again. You remember the disgust in his eyes, the thinly veiled threats about your job—”And now he has the perfect opportunity,” you whisper to yourself. “He really is going to do whatever he can to get me fired.” As if the universe had heard you, your phone buzzes with another text: it’s an alert from your bank, reminding you about the bills coming up soon. I can’t lose my job, you think, feeling the panic rush through your entire body. Ignoring the reminder, you open Yoongi’s text thread. Any chance you’ll be done with work early today?? It joins your last still-unopened message. You stare at your phone for a full minute, hoping to see his return text as it comes in. It doesn’t. You think about the leftovers sitting in the fridge in the break room and your stomach flips. Pushing the half-empty packet of pretzels away from you, you reboot your laptop. “I have to work harder.”

You sink into the last empty bus seat, closing your eyes against the pain thundering through your head. It’s 79 minutes past quitting time and you hadn’t even had a chance to look at your phone since lunchtime. You pry your eyes open and fish for your phone, taking a small breath before unlocking it. Three messages from Coworker #3, four from Coworker #2, and one sarcastic one-liner from The Problem. The pounding in your head increases. 32. From the time your team resumed its work after lunch until you had all finally left the building, The Problem had made 32 pointed comments towards you. “You don’t even have seniority, you know that, right?” “We talked about the project at lunch. What a shame you weren’t there.” “Last quarter’s numbers weren’t ideal, that’s what he told me. There’s a lot of dead weight in the company, especially in our department. Especially on our team.” Rubbing the back of your neck tiredly, you leave the text thread without replying and open the next new message. It’s another bank reminder: the deadline on your payment was coming a lot sooner than you remembered. How did it get to this point? You stare out the window blankly. I used to love my job. What did I ever do to get this target on my back? You open your phone again, navigating to your text-thread with your boyfriend. He still hasn’t read either of your earlier messages. You must be busy today. Still no answer. You turn back to look out the window, ignoring the pain in your head and stomach. After almost missing your stop, you trudge towards your apartment, your mind too full to pay attention to anything else. They talked about things at lunch. They must have talked about ME at lunch. He’s going to get me fired. You bump into someone and don’t bother apologizing. He is actually actively working to get rid of me. Why? Fumbling for your phone again, you send a private message to Coworker #3: What does SJ gain by getting me fired?? Her return message comes as you are unlocking your door. You force yourself to get inside and out of your shoes and coat before looking at it. Coworker #3: You’re obviously the biggest threat in the department. You know he’s looking for a fast-track promotion. If he can get rid of you, that’s one less hurdle he’ll have to jump. You okay? He was such an asshole today. Dropping your bag on the floor angrily, you move to the kitchen, hunting for the bottle of aspirin. Everyday* you correct. But he’s crazy. If our project tanks, he’ll go down with it. You down three tablets without water. Coworker #3: He thinks he can weasel his way out of it, obviously. Coworker #3: But anyway, don’t worry about it. We’re going to be fine. You doing okay? Did you even get a chance to eat lunch today??? You pause at this, setting your phone on the counter to pull open the fridge. Leftovers, milk, fruit, vegetables, eggs, kimchi, yogurt…You feel a pain in your stomach and can’t decide if it’s hunger or something else. Your gaze un-focuses as you stare, and suddenly all you can see are bills and numbers. The pain in your stomach grows and you slam the fridge shut. I can’t lose this job. I have too many bills to pay. If I get fired, I’m going to be so far behind on every single payment. I CAN’T lose this job. The buzz from your phone causes an immediate anxious reaction to jolt through your whole body: your chest feels tight, your heart starts pounding, the pain in your head feels blinding, your stomach flips. Forcing a deep breath, you slowly reach for the device again. The knot in your stomach immediately untangles as soon as you see the name on the message. Exhaling roughly, you open Yoongi’s message eagerly. Yoongi Hi sweetheart. I’m sorry ~ so busy today. And I’m going to be home late tonight. :( Your relief fades quickly. YoongiAre you okay? How was your day? Glancing at the time, you feel the knot retie with a vengeance. When your boyfriend said “late,” he meant late. “He won’t be back before midnight,” you whisper to yourself. The apartment gets a little smaller around you. Trying to push the darkness away, you ignore his questions: I love you. Be safe! Locking the screen, you turn back to the fridge. Holding the device close to your chest, you stare at the door. Replaying the images of what the fridge held, you tried to convince yourself to eat one of them—but with each mental picture, the knot grew tighter and you felt like you were going to throw up. Turning away from the fridge explosively, you wandered into the living room. You realized suddenly how much you’d been relying on Yoongi’s presence to help ease the current of tension that was flowing nonstop through your entire body. Now, faced with the prospect of hours without him, you had nothing to distract you but the fear. You watch Netflix (the volume up loud in an attempt to drown out your own thoughts) and play mindless phone games until 11:15pm. Your entire body aches with exhaustion and stress, but you still spend five more minutes staring at the front door in vain, waiting for him to come back. Eventually, you get slowly to your feet and trudge down the hall to the bedroom. You spend extra time washing your face, delaying the inevitable, but when you finally crawl into bed you’re exactly as distraught as you had expected. Not even the white noise machine can help you tonight. You toss and turn for hours, watching the clock on your nightstand tick past midnight. Every time you close your eyes, you’re bombarded with visions of bills and loans and banks and evil coworkers and your angry boss. You see papers stamped with bright red lettering: TERMINATED. The Problem’s words echo constantly. You manage to fall into a light, troubled sleep, and find yourself stuck in the dream-version of the day’s lunch. At the exact moment that your Dream-Boss and Dream-The-Problem turn to you in unison and say “YOU’RE FIRED” you startle awake. Glancing at the clock, you realize it’s 2am and you’re still alone. Squeezing your eyes shut tight, you feel the hot tears build underneath your eyelids and fight down the urge to call him. You struggle for another 20 minutes before sleep finally takes you. Five minutes after you pass out, he comes home.

The next morning, you startle awake at the sound of your alarm. Scrambling to turn it off, you realize that you can’t move easily. The panic eventually gives way to relief: you’re tangled in Yoongi’s arms, wrapped tight in his hug. Carefully, you manage to reach out an arm to shut off the alarm, then shift gingerly so you’re facing him. He stirs a little, his embrace tightening reflexively, and you give-in: burying your face in his chest, you give yourself the 10 snooze minutes. Now that you’re wrapped in his arms, all the things that had kept you awake seemed distant and tiny. For the first time in the last 24 hours, you feel the pain in your stomach fade. But too soon, your snooze alarm goes off. It’s time. Taking one last deep breath in his circle of safety, you gently untangle yourself from his grasp, unable to keep the faint smile off your face at his sleep-mumbled complaint. What I’d give to be able to stay right here, all day. But… I need this job. I’ve got to fight. So instead, you gently stroke his hair until he falls back into his deep-slumber. Realizing how late he must have gotten home, you fight down a pang of disappointment: he’d be asleep for a few hours more. Just what he needed, definitely, but you would be long gone by then. Pulling yourself together, you manage to get ready quietly and quickly, mentally preparing yourself for the day ahead. You plant a soft kiss on Yoongi’s forehead before you go, drawing a last bit of strength before heading out to face your dragons.

10:00am. You feel your phone buzz in your pocket but ignore it. You’re sitting sandwiched between Coworkers #2 and #3, The Problem on the far end. The boss hasn’t spoken for the last 5 minutes. Finally, he sighs. “I’ve come to expect much more from this department,” he says, meeting your eyes seriously. “This new proposal…it’s better. But is it really what it ought to be?” The Problem jumps in before you can even blink. “No, sir, I completely agree. It’s not up to standards. It—” “I think it can be fixed,” your boss continues, speaking over the other man easily. He meets your eyes again. “But it is going to take a lot of work. For example, the proposed direction in Section 4 seems a bit messy.” The Problem is nodding. “Team Leader was in charge of that section.” Coworker #2 stiffens next to you. “No, she wasn’t,” he snaps. “I-I mean,” the flush creeps up his neck. “Sir, our team worked together on each section and each proposal. Of course.” You don’t look over at The Problem. This is exactly what you had been expecting. “Of course, of course,” The Problem simpers. “But, obviously, we follow the direction of our project manager, don’t we, sir?” Your boss raises one eyebrow at you. “Well?” “We all worked together on this proposal, sir,” you say calmly, though your insides are twisting together again. “And, obviously, no part would have gone through without full consent from the entire team. Right?” you direct the question to The Problem, but don’t bother looking at him. He clears his throat. “We follow your inspiration, team leader.” You hear Coworker #3 hiss under her breath next to you. Your boss is studying The Problem carefully. Finally, he looks back at his tablet screen. “Sections 4, 7, and 10 all need some re-working. Can you have it done by tomorrow?” The tiny bit of satisfaction you felt at realizing none of those sections had been your assigned responsibility bleeds away at the deadline. Tomorrow?? Your head aches. After a moment, you realize he’s waiting for you to respond. “Absolutely, sir,” you agree steadily. “We will work hard.” “I expect nothing less,” he agrees. “Make sure it is as streamlined as possible. We want no further problems going forward.” “Yes, sir,” the three of you parrot together; The Problem’s answer is more drawn-out and sickeningly sweet. You don’t look at him as the four of you leave your boss’ office.

7pm. 2 hours past quitting time and the four of you were still holed-up in the conference room together. The Problem gets to his feet loudly, heading for the door. “Where are you going?” demands Coworker #2; his hair is messy and out of place, his glasses slightly askew. “Smoke-break,” he answers. “Can’t be in this room for one second longer.” He lets the door slam shut behind him. Coworker #3 rolls her shoulders out. “Funny,” she says darkly. “If he was in this room for one second longer, I think I’d rip his stupid little head off.” Coworker #2 turns to you. “I don’t know how you managed to keep your cool all day today, honestly. I wanted to punch him in the mouth 3 times in that meeting alone.” You sigh and sit back in your chair. The atmosphere in the room had changed as soon as The Problem had left. “I just want to finish this project,” you say honestly. I have to be the best possible, so there’s no room for judgment or complaint. “The sooner it ends, the sooner we can get away from him.” “I know where he parks his car,” Coworker #3 offers helpfully. “It would be such a shame if his tires got slashed somehow…” You share a small grin with her; a grin that fades as you realize how long it’d been since you smiled. The muscles in your face ached from the simple gesture. “Here,” Coworker #2 plops another bag of mini pretzels in front of you. “Snack break! Better eat now before he comes back and turns all our stomachs…” You scoff humorlessly. Staring at the bag of snacks, you feel your stomach twist. The last thing you wanted to do was eat anything right now, but then you calculate how long it had been since you’d eaten anything. Oh. That’s probably not healthy. Opening the bag, you pretend not to notice how much your hands are shaking. I need to eat a little, you convince yourself. Every part of you is tired and aching. How much longer can I go on like this? Until this is over, your stubborn side kicks in. Until the danger is passed. Until you know your job is safe. Suck it up. You manage to eat ¾ of the bag before The Problem returns and, just as your coworkers predicted, as soon as he’s back in the room you’re no longer hungry. Pushing the pretzels away angrily, the four of you return to silent, tense work for another 2 hours.

You climb into bed at 10pm that night, too exhausted to be kept up by worries. By tomorrow it’ll be all over. You vaguely wonder if you should be more worried about how much the dark edges around your vision are growing. The last thing you feel before falling into a dreamless sleep is how much your stomach hurts. You’re startled awake at 12:03am. “Sorry, sweetheart,” you hear Yoongi’s voice permeate the darkness. Seconds later, you feel his arms wrap around you. You roll over immediately, snuggling against his chest. “I didn’t mean to wake you up,” he says hoarsely, pulling the blanket higher up over you. “I’m so sorry.” You shake your head. “Are you okay?” He sighs, a heavy and weary sound that goes straight to your heart. “I’m fine.” “Liar,” you accuse gently, hugging him a little tighter. “What’s going on?” “Just busy. We’re working hard. Same as usual…” You press a kiss to his collarbone. “I know. You need to get some rest.” He crushes you closer. “I love you, sweetheart. I’m sorry I woke you up. You must be exhausted, too. Let’s get some rest, both of us, yeah?” “Okay,” you breathe, already feeling your eyelids growing heavy again. “Goodnight, baby.” He spreads a few soft kisses across your face. “Goodnight, my darling girl.”

The next morning, your alarms go off at the same time and you struggle awake together. You’re both moving too slow, so you’re almost late, but he still insists on driving you to work that day. On the way over, you don’t talk much, but he holds your hand over the center console like usual and that keeps you steady. When he pulls up in front of your building, you lean over to give him a kiss. “Have a good day, Yoongi,” you say, but your attention is already on what awaits you inside. “You too, sweetheart,” he says, but he doesn’t let go of your hand. Studying you, he frowns a little. “Are you sure you’re okay? You seem a little pale—” You power-up a false smile. “Don’t worry. I love you!” You press another kiss to his cheek and escape under this pretense. When you get out of the car, he reaches to roll your window down to call after you, but just then his phone buzzes so he abandons the idea and answers as he pulls away. You don’t turn around to watch him go, but your heart still flips when you hear the car leave. Staring up at your office building, you feel a sudden rush of dizziness and have to shut your eyes for a moment until it passes. The last day, you remind yourself. I need this job, I need this job, I need this job. You walk into the office and see Coworkers #2 and #3 sitting at their desks already. #2 is on the phone, but he gives you a bright smile as you walk past. “Hey! Are you—” Coworker #3′s voice falters as you move past her seat. “Whoa, are you okay?” You hesitate only slightly. “What?” She’s frowning. “You look really pale,” she says, lowering her voice slightly. “And have you lost weight?? You—” “I’m fine.” You feel the tips of your ears burn: if The Problem heard talk like this, it would be yet another way he could take you down. “Just tired.” “Are you sure? If—” “Positive,” you cut her off again. “Thanks. Plus, today’s the day, right? After this, things will be better.” Your stomach aches at the reminder. I can’t fail. “We better get to work!” You attempt cheerfulness and fail miserably. Coworker #3 gives you a furtive look, but doesn’t bring it up again. The Problem walks in exactly on time, sighing dramatically before flopping into his chair. Leaning back in his chair, he looks around the room, his gaze landing on you. “Well, here we are. I hope everyone is confident in their individual work…?” He lets it hang in the air. Coworker #2 sets the phone down too hard, already irritated. “I’m sure we’re all confident in both our personal AND our group work. Right?” He stares at The Problem until the other man is forced to look away from you. He pastes a sickening smile on his face. “Of course.” “Then let’s get started,” you say, trying to keep your voice devoid of any emotion. “We’ve only got 8 hours left.”

Hour 1: The four of you work in silence. The Problem gets up twice to refill his coffee, making much more noise than is necessary. You get another text from your bank. Hour 2: A portion of Coworker #2′s work didn’t save correctly. The ensuing meltdown leaves you frazzled and The Problem gleeful. Hour 3: The Problem sneaks away and is later found chatting in the staff room by Coworker #3. She doesn’t tell you everything he was saying, but the pit in your stomach knows well enough. Hour 4: You make sure everyone triple saves their work as lunchtime nears. The Problem goes on another secret mission but returns deflated: the bosses are having a private lunch and he was not allowed to join. The secret satisfaction you feel at this fades as he critically looks over one portion of your work. You skip lunch to continue working. Hour 5: Somehow, The Problem’s attitude has gotten even worse since lunch. He snarks and sneers and reluctantly helps Coworker #3 on their joint section. While they’re bickering, Coworker #2 sends you a file: it’s a list of incidents and complaints that he’s preparing to send to the boss and HR. You manage a tiny, real smile. Hour 6: The Problem finally directly challenges you on a portion of the project that you’ve worked on. Backed by both of your other coworkers, the three of you manage to shout him down. He works half-heartedly on his assigned portion. Hour 7: Your stomach hurts so much. Every time you take a small break from the work in front of you, it feels like it’s going to swallow you whole. You force yourself to drink some water, but it sloshes too uncomfortably in your empty stomach. Your head aches and you feel unbelievably tired. Almost there… Hour 8: Fifteen minutes before the deadline, you save, double-save, triple-save, and back-up the project to 3 different locations. “It’s finished,” Coworker #2 says, leaning back in his chair and rubbing at his eyes violently. “I guess,” scoffs The Problem, getting to his feet. He locks eyes with you. “Hope you feel good about it, Team Leader.” Without waiting for a response, he turns on his heel and heads for the door. “See you guys in there. I’ve got something to do.” Out of the corner of your eye, you see Coworker #2 add something to his list. “Ignore him,” Coworker #3 encourages; she clearly is still very worried about you. “It’s going to be fine. I think we’ve done some good work here.”

The walk from your shared office space to the boss’ office isn’t very far, but by the end of it, your legs feel like jelly, your heart is pounding, you’re short of breath, and your head is screaming. You sink into the nearest chair, trying to convince yourself that you were fine. Your stomach aches. The meeting is short. The Problem tries 3 times to throw you under the bus, but at this point, you and your other two coworkers are prepared and unified. By the end, even your boss seems irritated with The Problem—at least, you think that’s what is happening. You can’t really be sure anymore, to be honest: your vision is going slightly blurry, the dark edges growing, and you feel incredibly light-headed. 45 minutes past usual quitting time, your boss gives you a solemn nod. “Well done,” he says seriously. “This project is much better and more what I was expecting. Thank you.” The relief washes over you and you feel weak. “Well done, Team Leader,” your boss adds, then gives Coworkers #2 and #3 a smile. “Now go home and get some rest.” It might be your current physical state, but you swear he gives The Problem a slightly disapproving look. It must be real, because The Problem is the first to leave, disappearing without another look at any of you. Somewhat numb, you get to your feet with the other two, following them out of the office. As soon as the three of you are out of sight of the boss’ office, Coworker #2 gathers both of you into a giant hug. “We did it!!!! Oh man!” He releases you with a huge exhale. “We should celebrate! Dinner? Drinks? Meat??” Coworker #3 gives him a look, then tilts her head towards you meaningfully. “I think I’m just going to take our brilliant Team Leader home.” He turns to look at you, and even in your fuzzy state you can see the look of concern that crosses his face. “Oh, right. Yeah. Let’s get some rest tonight. We can celebrate tomorrow!” You manage a smile. “Sounds good. G-good job you guys.” Coworker #3 loops her arm through yours securely. “It’s all because of you, oh fearless leader!” she quips. “Let’s go!” Sitting in the passenger seat of her car, you try to relax; the last thing you wanted was for her to have to walk you up to your apartment door. So you fake a brighter smile, thank her for the ride, and hop out before she can offer to help. You turn to wave as she drives away, gritting your teeth against the way your head starts spinning, but wait until she’s gone before you move. I did it. You think as you slowly climb the stairs. I made it. I’m not going to get fired. Things are going to be okay. Your stomach flips and you have to pause for a second: Don’t throw up, don’t throw up, don’t throw up. You wait until the feeling passes. I just need to get inside. Lie down for a while….maybe…maybe eat? The house will be cool and empty and calm. Empty. You realize you hadn’t texted Yoongi all day. Now that things were over, you could finally relax around him, tell him the truth. You stumble on the last step, nearly face-planting but saving yourself at the last second. Just need to…lie….down. You punch in the door code, push it open, step inside—and are startled to see Yoongi sitting on the couch. “Baby—” he gets to his feet, a smile on his face, but it disappears when he sees you. The surprise is too much for your already-battered body. You try to step towards him and everything goes dark.

Fortunately for you, he was already moving towards you when you crumpled; he managed to catch you before you hit the floor, cradling you carefully against him in a state of controlled panic. You wake up as the EMTs are loading you into the ambulance, and the only thing that stops you from freaking out is the sound of his voice. “I don’t think she’s eaten for a while,” he’s saying as he climbs in next to you. “She’s overworked, overtired—Maybe dehydrated? I don’t—” “It’s okay, sir,” one of the medics says. She gives him a small smile. “She’s going to be fine.” “Yoongi…” you mumble, his name getting lost in the oxygen mask over your face, but at that moment he turns to look at you anyway. Exhaling in relief, he leans down to press a kiss to your forehead. “It’s okay, sweetheart,” he reassures you, brushing your hair away from your face. “I’m here.” Something about the combination of your complete exhaustion, the motion of the ambulance, the oxygen mask, and the warmth of Yoongi’s presence lulls you into a light sleep. There’s a transfer from the ambulance to the emergency room, from gurney to hospital bed. There’s several people in scrubs and masks that look you over. You vaguely feel the prick of the IV in your arm. You’re asked a lot of questions and you give a lot of answers you can’t remember, but eventually, you’re left alone. Almost. Taking your hand, Yoongi leans down to kiss your forehead again. “You’re going to be okay,” he says softly against your skin. “Oh, baby, I’m so sorry.” You shake your head weakly. “You don’t have to apologize. I—” “You’re extremely dehydrated,” he cuts over you, tightening his hold on your hand. “I don’t think you’ve slept well for days. And you…you said you hadn’t eaten for—since Monday?? Sweetheart, I….” he’s getting worked up. You squeeze his hand. “It’s not your fault.” Exhaling shakily, he meets your eyes. “Why?” “Well—” you suddenly look at him. “Wait. Don’t you need to be at work right now? What about the tour problems? And Tae? And Jimin’s back. And—” “Stop.” He finally pulls a chair close to the bed and sits. “I only need to be here right now. With you. This is where I should have been for the last few days, then maybe we wouldn’t be here right now.” You close your eyes in embarrassment. “I’m sorry.” Pressing the back of your knuckles to his lips, he shakes his head and murmurs. “Don’t say sorry. Let’s just talk. Tell me everything.” So you do. You tell him all about the project, The Problem, your boss, your coworkers, the bank notifications, everything. “And I just got so worked up over it,” you finish tiredly. “I didn’t want to talk about it. And then I knew you were busy, so I didn’t want to bother you….and things just got out of control.” He nods slowly. “I should’ve paid better attention,” he says quietly. “We were both too wrapped up in our own things. Never again, I promise you.” He reaches up to brush your hair back again. “I will do better at my job of keeping you safe and healthy and happy, okay? I promise.” You’re too tired to argue so you just nod. Smiling, he reaches up to kiss you softly. “And in return,” he adds, stroking the side of your face, “You have to talk to me. About all the things, all right? Especially the ones that make you worried and want to stop eating. Can you do that?” You nod again. “I think I can manage that.” “Also, you have to promise to do whatever it takes to stay healthy, okay? I can’t live without you,” he smiles. “So it’s your responsibility to take care of the most precious thing on this earth. Understood?” You roll your eyes but fondly. “I love you,” you say quietly. He kisses the tip of your nose. “I love you more. Now, let’s get you some rest so we can go home and snuggle. Okay?” You laugh lightly and agree.

When you’re finally released from the hospital, Yoongi insists on pushing your hospital-mandated wheelchair out to the waiting car. He wraps an arm around your waist and basically carries you to the backseat, helping you in before shutting the door behind you both securely. He holds you close on the ride on home; you rest your head on his shoulder gratefully. The babying continues when you arrive back at the apartment: he scoops you into his arms and carries you all the way up to your place, commenting in a displeased voice: “You’re too light, babygirl. You need to stay healthy.” You give his neck a squeeze. “Whatever you say,” you agree, resting your head against his shoulder. At his light scoff-laugh, you smile. “I’m just trying to live up to my promises!” “Sure, sure.” As soon as you reach the apartment, he takes you straight to bed, settling you in your spot and tucking the blanket around you securely. Kissing your cheek, he says, “Now. What do you want to eat? Anything you want, baby.” “Um….” you pretend to think hard. “Maybe…kimbap? BBQ? Pizza? Soup?” At his humored expression, you grin. “Everything sounds good!” “Then everything,” he says, kissing your lips softly, “is what you shall have.” While you both wait for the food to arrive, he never leaves your side. You cuddle against him, watching mindless TV and drinking from the water bottles he keeps pressing into your hands until he’s satisfied. He insists on feeding you the first few bites of food until you finally rebel, accepting his kiss happily instead. The two of you eat in relative silence, and you realize just how hungry you are. Tipping your head over onto his shoulder, you say softly, “I’m sorry I worried you.” He turns slightly to kiss your temple again. “You’re safe, sweetheart. That’s all that matters.” At that moment, your phone goes off. Your knee-jerk reaction is panic, but it immediately fades as you remember that everything is over and Yoongi is there next to you. Still, you take a small breath before reading the screen. The smile spreads across your face slowly. Yoongi glances at you. “What is it?” You turn the screen towards him: Coworker #3: YOU GUYS. SJ just got transferred to another department!!!!!! He can never bug us again!!!!!!!!! Yoongi grins with you. “That’s great news.” He kisses you again. “See? Everything is going to be fine.” “You’re right.” He clears the almost-empty food containers off the bed and when he climbs back in, you snuggle into his side automatically. He wraps his arms around you and presses a few soft kisses all over your face. “I love you so much,” he says in between kisses. “I’m so proud of you. You did it.” “Yes,” you agree, feeling your eyes close all on their own. I did.

#Anonymous #bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts clean imagines #non-smut #BTS #REQUESTS #ASKS #apriori sea imagines #apriori sea requests #bts imagine yoongi #yoongi #suga

82 notes · View notes

blackcoffeeandblankpagess · 4 years

Text

Random Life Updates/Thoughts

helloooooooooooo humans

Got into Eugene last Saturday, my mom officially left yesterday morning (had to drive her to the airport at 3am yikes!), and the past 6 days have just been a blur of moving

I LOVE my apartment. It has a giant balcony area which is by far my favorite part and something I really prioritized when searching. Especially with working from home I really wanted a space of my own to get outside. I really was going into this place pretty blind, obvi I couldn’t tour it and I only had a few pics to go off of, no concept of sq footage or layout, but it really truly feels pretty perfect. Once I have everything together I’ll post some pics :) still waiting on furniture orders and random little things

My mom and I picked up a few lil plants since I have the space outside and they make me so happy??? We got basil and mint and I am planning to buy lettuce at the farmer’s market. And my mom got me lavender as a surprise ! Currently drinking water with lemon and my my basil in it now, so good

Have been being v chill on the running the past week. Last Wednesday aka a week ago was when I got my beloved parasites 🙃 which, up until monday when I started taking the oregano oil, made running SUPER painful since my stomach hurt so bad. Have been being gentle with myself and resting more on the formal movement, especially since my days have naturally been so full with moving activities (lugging heavy furniture up stairs is no easy task lemme tell ya). I had planned on running today but it was rainy and cozy and I was tired so I just did some strength training and yoga and it was nice! being less of a maniac and developing an ability to listen to my body is nice!

^^also re: worms, feeling totally normal now, apparently the oregano oil is truly the move!

I honestly feel really, really good mentally. It sounds counterintuitive but I know it’s because I’ve been so busy. I literally have not had time to stress over the dumb shit my brain chooses to obsess over.

^I think this season of life is going to be really good for me.

My roadtrip with my mom was really great. I love that I can say that. We have an extremely close relationship but we also very quickly end up screaming at eachother on any given day, conflicting personalities let’s say. So basically everyone who knows us was like ....you guys are gonna go on a 2 week roadtrip together are you nuts?? I firmly believed it would be fine because we have very similar travel styles which tends to be the main point of tension on any trip with other people and I was right! It was good! Honestly I think it was my fave cross country trip I’ve taken (I’ve driven coast to coast 5 times). I also think a big part of that was that I worked really hard to push away the intrusive thoughts about food and squash that anxiety and just be present and enjoy the trip which is something that has been SO hard the past few years especially. It makes me really hopeful for future travels. Also...our route was just so fking cool ugh

Have a lil over a week before orientation and 2 before classes start and I am soooooo glad I got here with time to spare because my days have been FULL and I still have a lot to accomplish, but starting to feel like things are semi under control

Today it was rainy and cozy, I just baked a loaf of pumpkin bread because I am willing it to be fall, I have leftover thai takeout from when my mom was here for dinner, I’m on my couch in sweatpants with a candle lit and ready to just CHILL the rest of the night and I am happy. Boy am I happy.

#personalposts

32 notes · View notes

surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #324

“i'll sharpen my knife upon the stone made from the ruin of a dead god's throne / listen to these words as my seeds are sown: it's time to amputate the infected zone”

What is the last game you played on your phone? Pokemon GO. Do you give people personalized ringtones? No. Does your phone screen have any cracks? No. What makeup products are you wearing, if any? None. How would you describe your skin tone? Very pale. Do you have your full birth name on Facebook? Yes. What is your least favorite fruit? Probably cherries. How often do you walk around barefoot? Whenever I'm in my house or another person's who prefers shoes off inside. Would you need to sleep with someone before considering marrying them? Nah. Do you think people look up to you? No. How often do you have trouble sleeping at night? Every night. Do you ever rehearse conversations before you have them? YEP. In my head, at least. Can you name five current world leaders? No, haha... When taking a cab, do you talk to the driver? Cabs aren't really a thing here. I've never been in one. Do you always read the book before you see a movie based on a book? No. What is your favorite urban legend? The Jersey Devil. Mothman is dope and super creepy, too. I love cryptids, period. Are you an elitist (even a little bit) when it comes to anything? What? No, because I hate people like that so much. What type of fabric is most comfortable for clothing? I dunno, I don't pay attention to this. If you wear one – bras with or without a wire? With, so long as they're not poking out and stabbing you... If you wear one – are you able to find cute bras in your size? Definitely not. What length do you like your shorts to be? You'd have to pay me some big bucks to see me in shorts, period. Have you ever cut off jeans or other pants and made them into shorts? No. Have you cut the sleeves out of T-shirts to make tank tops? I don't think so, no. What was the last disappointing movie you saw? *shrug* What was the last disappointing book you read? Even bigger *shrug*. Do you ever watch compilation videos? Of what? Rarely, but if I do, they're generally old Vines and stuff. What was the last thing you rolled your eyes about? Probably something stupid on Facebook. Do you like Hellboy? If so, do you prefer the old movies or the new one? I have no thoughts on this. Favorite Disney character who isn’t royalty? Dory! Do you have a lot of people whom you don’t talk to all the time or see all the time, but still consider to be your friends? Yeah, like friends from high school and online childhood ones. Do you typically do your make up the same each time? Or do you like to change it up often? It's just about always the same. Do you enjoy making surveys as well as taking them or do you just prefer to copy, paste, fill out, post? The latter. I don't make surveys. Have you got a significant other? How are things between the two of you? If not, what was your most meaningful/long term relationship and how did that come to an end? I don't. My longest and deepest relationship was with Jason, and he ended it when my depression became too much for him to handle. Have you spent much time in a vehicle lately? What for and where have you gone most this past month? No. I've barely left the house lately for obvious reasons. Has it rained yet this year where you live? How about hailed? It's been raining like crazy lately. A few mornings ago, it also hailed very heavily for a few minutes. What is your favorite thing about Mac computers? I like the sleek, clean look of them. What is your favorite thing about PCs? They have more power for playing games. What are some errands you need to run soon? None. Well, we have a Wal-Mart order to pick up I think tomorrow, and I'll probably ride with Mom. What color was your high school graduation gown? Red. It was between that and navy, and I was really hoping for the latter, but it lost the vote. The red was so obnoxious. How many graduation gowns have you worn? One. Are your parents’ dreams for your life different than your own? I don't think they have their own specific "dreams" for my life. They both want me to create my own future that makes me happy. Have your dreams for your life changed? Definitely, over all the years. Would you ever want to learn sign language? Not especially, but it'd be cool I suppose. What’s the last thing you had for dinner? Chicken tenders, I think? Or was that the night before? Have you ever performed a solo dance in front of a crowd? No, but I almost did. At my old dance studio, the high school seniors had the option to a solo, and I was working on one to "Coma White" by Marilyn Manson, because it was and still is a song I really feel in regards to my mental health and many medications I "have" to be on. I was doing fine, but I stopped when I realized I just really was too nervous as a dance competition approached. Have you ever sung a solo? No. What was the last job you had? Deli worker. For two hours. What was your first job? Sales associate at GameStop. Who was/were your favorite coworker(s)? I never really had one. At what age did you start experiencing sexual attraction, if any? I don't know. Probably my freshman year of high school is when my levels of attraction to people reached a sexual and not just romantic level. Have you ever split open a rock with a hammer, to see a geode inside? UGH no, but I so wanna find one of those one day. What states have you lived in? Only North Carolina. S.O.S., get me outta here. What is your favorite thing about the month in which it is now? You start to see some flowers blooming. Who were your best friends in high school? I had a decent group of close friends, but I was closest to Hannia. I wish I still had contact with her. ^Are they still your best friends now? No. She deleted me off Facebook at some point. Do you live near the mountains? No; they're on the western end of the state, and I live on the opposite side. Do you live near a beach? It's about two hours away. What is your favorite beach that you’ve been to? I don't have a fave. Do you collect seashells? Nah, but I like picking them up and looking at them. My sisters and I used to collect them, though. We have a plastic container of them somewhere. If you were to start a new collection, what would it be? I desperately want a cornucopia of Markiplier merch, sobs. Is there a certain place or store you especially hate going to? I don't like going to most stores, really. I'm an online shopper. When was the last time you made plans with someone? October of last year. How long do leftovers usually sit in your fridge? Depends on the food. They tend to stay in there a bit too long, though. What is something you do for other people that shows you care for them? Offer to listen to them and always be a source of support and love. What was the last animal/pet that you met? Kinda recently, someone in our neighborhood was walking their German shepherd, and Mom chatted with the lady for a bit while I listened. Is there anyone in your life with whom your opinion changes on frequently? No. Have you ever kept a journal? Do you currently keep one? Yes, on-and-off during multiple periods of my life. These surveys are like my journals now. Is there a certain song or band who remind you of specific people? Yep. Motionless In White and Black Veil Brides, Jason. Pink Floyd and Evanescence, Sara. Metallica, Mom. Van Halen, Dad. Etc., etc. How often do you style your hair differently from how you normally style it? Never. Have you ever found out that you have been sleep walking? No, I never have. What’s the last thing you promised yourself? I don't know about promised. I take those so seriously, even to myself, that I hesitate to make them. Have you ever tried making something from one of those short cooking videos? How did it turn out? No, but my friend once tried making that "muffin in a cup" thing and it was absolutely horrid. Very eggy. When was the last time you had to wait in line for longer than a few minutes? Good question. Going into places is so rare nowadays, so it's hard to encounter this issue. Well wait, maybe at a fast food place? Idr. Have you ever written a review for a product you bought online? No, but I should do that once I actually use my own money to buy from small businesses in particular... if I had something good to say, anyway. I'd feel bad trash-talking a product. Do you ever interact with any brands/companies online? No. Is there anything you seem especially sensitive to, such as sounds, smells, etc? Smells, yes. What was the last thing you had the urge to do? Read, even though I didn't do it. .-. Is there anyone you feel that takes you for granted? No. Do you ever read the comments on social media posts? Sometimes, particularly if I have strong feelings about something. What was the last “good” thing to happen to you? My PHP therapist felt confident enough in my progress to step me down to three sessions a week versus every weekday. Last awkward situation you were in? Thankfully it was a one-on-one session, but the same aforementioned therapist was asking me questions that really stumped me, so I kept going very quiet as I thought and felt awkward and dumb. He's brilliant at his job. Think of the last time you were sick – what were you sick with? I think the last issue I had that qualifies as "sick" was a double ear infection from Hell itself. That was like two years ago. How do you think your life would change without social media? I'd be incredibly bored, but I, among I think most others, would be more positive and have a more realistic outlook on life. Social media highlights the best times in our life, and I do feel that that has had a negative effect on pretty much everyone. I don't at all believe social media is bad in essence, though. It's a wonderful way to stay connected. What was the last thing you wanted to buy, but couldn’t afford? I can't afford a new terrarium for Venus for probably a while, being without a job and all... How do you get your news? Facebook, haha. How often do you drive? Never, right now. My permit is long expired, and my vision isn't up to par to renew it. If you had to go (back) to school and completely change your career path, what would you choose to study/pursue? I guess biology? Are there any TV shows you constantly quote or know almost every line to? No. What do you think about lizards? I adore lizards; they're all so cute, big or small, and truly little dinosaurs. They're beautiful and so vast in appearances and behavior. Is there anything that people assume about you that isn’t true, and that you find very irritating? Not that I find irritating, no. How would you rate your “detective” skills? Uh, what am I "detecting?" I'm pretty good at digging online if I'm really hunting something down, I guess. Have you ever done consumer testing (testing products before they come out on the market)? If not, would you ever want to? No; I wouldn't be opposed, depending on the product. Have you ever received anesthesia or morphine? Both. The one time (I'm aware of) where I had morphine oddly enough did jack-all, though. If you had to choose which video game to be in, which would it be? Hmmm. Maybe like, Shadow of the Colossus, living in the beautiful garden on the top of the shrine? With the deer, the birds, fruit, just its general beauty... That would be awesome, especially with one other person, especially an s/o. Just the two of us in a gorgeous land. Between the two, would you rather live in a place where it’s only night or where it’s only day? Only day, I suppose. Vitamin D is very important, for one thing, and it always being dark would definitely affect my depression. And what about the flowers blooming and being able to take pictures? :( Sleep would still be possible by just closing your shades and stuff. Is there anyone that makes your skin crawl? Maggots, bot flies, parasites, patterns of small holes, etc. Do you like it when people are affectionate with you? Yes. If we're at least friends, anyway. I'm a very affectionate person. Have the past few days been bad, good, or neutral? They've been pretty all right. If you had to be an actor/actress in a movie, what genre of the movie would you be best at? Probably as an insane villain in a superhero movie or something. Are people more likely to tell you to tone it down or to speak up? Speak up. I'm a mumbler. I can be too loud sometimes too, though, particularly when I'm excited. What’s the last thing that you procrastinated? Now. Emerson's birthday was last month and I still haven't touched her pictures... Out of fire, earth, water, wind, light, and dark, which element appeals the most to you? Dark. What’s your favorite color on a vehicle? Burnt orange, pink. The last pain that you experienced, was it physical or emotional? Physical. What was one of your favorite songs as kid? I liked lots of pop songs. When’s the last time you tried to get revenge, if ever? Never. It's not something I chase after. Do you like Taylor Swift? No. What’s your favorite Disney Channel movie? The Haunted Mansion, I think. That's a Disney movie, isn't it? If you met your favorite celebrity, would you be calm or star struck? I'd be a deer in headlights, stuttering and stammering over ways to thank him and crying like a bitch. I'd be super embarrassed, but I absolutely hope I get to meet him one day. Do you ever have to do yard work? No. Is your school close to your house? I'm no longer in school. Do you have any live versions of songs in your music software? Yes. Did/do you listen to Britney Spears songs? Yeah, I like her. What shorthand do you use the most? Probably "lmao." What album is the current song you’re listening to off of? METAWAR. In your opinion, what song is the most overplayed right now? I wouldn't know; I don't listen to the radio. Are you in a band? No. When I started high school though, I wished I could be a guitarist in one. That's one reason I started taking lessons, haha. Does your favorite band have a male or female lead singer? Male. Have you ever been to a Broadway show? No. Do you prefer group or individual work? Individual, by a long shot. I work much better alone. Could you ever complete a 500-piece puzzle? I think I have before. I used to love puzzles. When was the last time you rode in a limo? Damn son, never; what could possibly give you the idea I could afford to ever do THAT????? Do you take naps daily? Almost every day, yes. Do you still make Christmas lists? Yeah, because I'm asked to. Do you watch the show Dexter? Never seen it, no. Are you currently using a blanket? Yes. My feet are cold. How long is the song you’re listening to? 4:06. Is your mom or dad the older parent? Mom, but only by a year. Did you ever listen to Avril Lavigne when you were younger? Who didn't? I still listen to a couple songs. When was the last time you changed a light bulb? Not all that long ago when Venus' lamp bulb died. How often do you clean your car out? I don't have my own car. Did you ever buy NOW ("Now That’s What I Call Music") CDs? My older sister did, yes. What color (mainly) is your computer? It's black. What is in the back seat of your car right now? In Mom's car, idk. But there's usually some stuff back there. What is your favorite episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.? Never watched it. Last person’s house you were in? Besides my own, my older sister's. Who is the last person you sent a message to on Facebook? My friend Chelsea. We were catching up. Were you an honor roll student in school? Yes. Do you have a tan? HA. Are you someone’s best friend? Yes. <3 What do you think of when you think of Australia? Huntsmen spiders. *shudders* Favorite gemstone? Of the basic ones, rubies. If we're talking of all of them, even the obscure, then dragon's breath opal. I'd LOVE to have a ring of one of those. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? Almost always the drive-thru. What color is your mom’s hair? It's all gray now. Does your first memory involve your dad? No. Biggest annoyance in your life right this minute? My social anxiety. Do you like watching a bonfire? Yeah. Fire is mesmerizing. Do you ever get flu shots? No, but I really should. Once the Covid vaccine is accessible to all though, I'm getting it for the protection of my immunocompromised mother.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''affluenza'' by 3teeth

3 notes · View notes

coffeeandcalligraphy · 4 years

Text

Summon Away | Writing Update

Hey People of Earth!

The day has come! I am finally writing an update on the fifteenth and final chapter of Moth Work, which I wrote about a month ago!

Summon Away is probably the shortest in the book at just over 1800 words, and also one of my faves because it’s so?? tender?? I wrote it in one sitting and couldn’t have asked for a better end to this book. Here’s a scene breakdown:

Scene A:

Harrison sees Lonan for a soft moment early in the morning, free of the stress of Eliza lmaooo. They have a super tender moment, however there’s this strange tension to the point where we know something isn’t exactly right.

Harrison moves the scene along by saying he’s going to grab a pack of cigarettes from a gas station down the road. From the context, we can probably tell this is true, except he ain’t coming back. Probably the most sweepingly dramatic moment I’ve ever written and I’m here for it loool. This is my soap opera moment where Harrison essentially leaves Lonan to have his new relationship with Eliza, despite his concern, because he’s gotta make a decision that’s healthiest for him and that’s called character development folks!!

Did I break my own heart breaking up my OTP :) yes!!!

Scene B:

This is a really short half scene where Harrison locates his mother who doesn't live far from Eliza’s apartment.

Scene C:

Harrison and his mother sit outside on her balcony and he reflects on his decision to split (literally a trend that all my Fostered characters are yeeting away from each other oops) while watching people below engage in some form of a relationship with one another. So much drama!!

The chapter gets its title from a Nothing But Thieves song (why would it not at this point), Tempt You (Evocatio). I was struggling to title this chapter because I needed something that fit the vibe, and had actually tried to use the concept of an evocation to title a chapter for this book previously to no avail. However, after revisiting the Wikipedia article for an evocation, I came across the definition of “summon away”:

The Latin word evocatio was the "caIIing forth" or "summoning away" of a city's tutelary deity. The rituaI was conducted in a miIitary setting either as a threat during a siege or as a result of surrender, and aimed at diverting the god's favor from the opposing city to the Roman side, customariIy with a promise of a better-endowed cuIt or a more Iavish Tempie.

I thought this concept of “summoning away” sounded slightly contradictory (the word summon brings images of a coming forth of some sorts, while the word away sounds like the opposite at least to me am I making this more *metaphorical* than it is perhaps) and I really thought the chapter strangely fit the above definition, hence my choosing!

Excerpts:

This is kind of torture because I dearly miss writing the boys interacting as they’re not with each other in Feeding Habits the angstttt:

“What is that?” Harrison asks, pulling back a barstool with one hand, while pointing at the mug with another.

Lonan glances up, and the two mutually analyze each other. Lonan’s puckered skin, how morning makes his eyelashes papery, like wings. He wonders what Lonan sees in him—for a moment, it’s all he wants to know.

Lonan knuckles the mug over and Harrison picks it up like he’s holding an eyeball. The tea is hot, though Lonan hasn’t seemed to mind, and its flowery perfume burns Harrison’s throat. Lonan pulls the mug back to him when Harrison’s done, and takes another sip.

“I still have no idea,” Harrison says, and to his shame, studies Lonan’s face for a bite wound.

“Earl grey.”

“Sounds fancy.”

“It expired four years ago.”

Harrison gasps, and Lonan almost smiles. And for a moment, Harrison almost forgets where he is. What happened at this counter just a few hours prior. With Lonan, it almost disappears. They could be back at the cabin, needling through the woods on that first day they tried to get rid of the dark room. They could be in the water, shielding, yet simultaneously pushing each other under. They could be dancing to no music in a tiny bathroom or driving for carless miles in the tarnish of rain.

This is my very overt metaphor that I bullshitted to title this novel that ended up working being very overtly injected into this book !! :))) but imagine this part with a sepia filter and it’s actually a silent film with captions oh:

“I found this article,” Lonan says, and turns the paper over. It’s not very long, just a small corner of the entire page, but Harrison sees the title, all bolded, Summer’s Dreaded Pesk: 10 Facts About Moths. He leans in closer to read it.

The facts are almost all useless to him—that moths like sweet things, that there are thousands of species, that many don’t eat, but what sticks out to him is the last: how they’re attracted to light. Harrison skims the text with his fingernail, reads something about light traps, and tries not to think of how unfortunate it all is—to move toward light and then stop moving altogether.

He knows whatever he will say will keep him here, in this sun, on this barstool, reading the newspaper about moths, sitting next to Lonan, drinking his tea, never knowing what flavour it is. Harrison inhales, and on his exhale, unclasps the chain and drapes it around Lonan’s throat.

When the angel hits Lonan’s chest, a sound comes out of his mouth that Harrison thinks is almost animal. Harrison’s hand lingers on the back of Lonan’s neck when he clasps it, feeling the pulse of Lonan’s heartbeat, even from all the way up here.

Lonan clutches the angel when Harrison pulls back, and he doesn’t let go, even when Harrison rises.

“I’m going to grab a pack of cigarettes,” Harrison says. “Is there a gas station around here?”

“Just up the road.” Lonan’s brows furrow.

“Do you want anything?”

“I don’t think so.”

Harrison nods. Then he steps back, away from the kitchen, and slips his shoes on, one by one, more carefully than he’s ever done before. He knows Lonan looks at him. He knows what’ll be in his eyes if he looks up—and so he doesn’t. Harrison checks his jacket pocket for his car keys, and when they jangle, he turns toward the door.

“How long?”

Lonan’s voice makes him jump.

“Pardon?”

“How long will you be gone?”

Harrison frowns. “I’m just grabbing a pack of cigarettes.”

So Harrison’s reaction to everything being white and gold is my reaction to modern decoration loool this is just CNF at this point:

Harrison buys the pack of cigarettes. And then the gum. And then he finds his mother.

She isn’t hard to locate. A quick question at the checkout counter, and he finds out the apartment complex near the public garden is only a fifteen-minute drive away.

It’s just as he pictures it. A white building, with a white lobby, the bricks white, the carpets white, the tables white. In little places, there are bits of gold, in place he doesn’t think gold should be—lining the keyboard the security guard types at, on the edges of every window so it’s only visible when the sun flashes.

And at last, here’s the final paragraph of the book!!! angst!!

His mother reads. Harrison watches. A father and son down below, who take turns walking their golden retriever. A food stand vendor that hands a stack of checked tissues to a mother wrangling four small children. A couple who take photos in front of a fountain, how he can almost hear the mechanical click of their camera from fifty feet up. Something stirs inside of him, at the thought of Lonan back in that golden apartment, and he only realizes what it is much later, when his mother is heating up something spiced and leftover in the microwave. The feeling like being buried alive and wanting to do it again just so someone can pull you out. A loneliness he sucks on until his mouth sores.

And there it is!! This book has been so much fun to share with y’all! Thanks for reading these updates and for all the love for this novel. I haven’t written anything for book two in a while, and am now feeling nostalgic to do so, so keep an eye out for more Moth Work related endeavors! For now this is the end!

--Rachel

#writing #writingupdates #writeblr #writerblr #amwriting #mothwork #fostered

36 notes · View notes

blarrghe · 4 years

Text

I got tagged by @oediebees, thanks, these are fun! and I’ll tag umm @lavellanhunter @serphena @midnightprelude if y’all feel like it

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?

curly hair don’t care (I don’t brush my hair I comb it in the shower sometimes...the comb is blue)

2. A food you never eat?

Meat, dairy.... a bunch of things that hurt my tummy (except I eat them anyway oops)

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?

I run pretty cold. Poor circulation lyfeeee

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Hangin with the bae learning about ancient history because we are nerds.

5. What is your favorite candy bar?

like chocolate bar? I can’t eat chocolate and it makes me sad. I bought a vegan white chocolate bar at the health food store a while ago for like 5$ it was good but like. it was also five whole dollars.

6. Have you ever been to a professional sporting event?

NHL game once. There was a fight on the ice and then in the stands XD

7. What was the last thing you said out loud?

“Love you, bee” yes we are very cute thank

8. What is your favorite ice cream?

Stop asking me about things I’m not allowed to eat waah. I bought vegan icecream and it made me sick also lol so literally just. let’s go with rainbow sherbert. (it used to be cookie dough ice cream stop doing this to me)

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?

Water

10. Do you like your wallet?

My best friend and I bought matching star wars wallets a couple years ago and we both still use them so yeah. it’s got the millennium falcon on it and it came with a keychain that I eventually gave to a kid at work.

11. What was the last thing you ate?

Leftover veggie stir fry with black beans! I made it yesterday and it was pretty good if I say so myself.

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

I haven’t bought any new clothes since like, October?

13. The last sporting event you watched?

uhhhhhhhhh does walking by a soccer game in the park count

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

I make it with salt and nutritional yeast! and sometimes garlic too. Highly recommend.

15. Who was the last person you sent a text message to?

Actual text? Coworker.

16. Ever go camping?

As much as I can! Went every summer as a kid, and last summer went on a month long cross-country camping roadtrip. Probably won’t get to go again for a while though.

17. Do you take vitamins?

I buy them and then forget does that count

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?

I can count on one hand the number of times I have gone to a church service. And if you discount funerals then I’m pretty sure it’s...2? (and if you wanna do the thing and make it synagogue then still only for the holidays and not in years and years)

19. Do you have a tan?

Pretty sure I am actually incapable of having a tan.

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?

I probably shouldn’t be eating either. Homemade pizza with flatbread and vegan cheese is pretty good tho.

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?

Not usually

22. What color socks do you usually wear?

I just have a large collection of various cute patterened socks with like, cats and stuff on em. Current faves are the ones that make my feets look like sharks =]

23. Ever drive above the speed limit?

speed of traffic but also, I don’t have a car so.

24. What terrifies you?

ummm the feeling you get when you’re stuck under water and think your gonna drown isn’t very fun.

25. Look to your left what do you see?

pillows, cart thing with books on it, closet.

26. What chore do you hate?

changing the cat litter kinda sucks

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?

Uh. Australia, I guess?

28. What is your favorite soda?

I’m a big fan of buying random overpriced weird flavoured drinks so probably like, the blue jones soda or something. But realistically, cream soda and gingerale.

29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

I don’t have a car so. I also don’t get fast food much tho.

30. Who was the last person you talked to?

The boy!

31. Favorite cut of beef?

Literally no idea haven’t eaten it in over ten years

32. Last song you listened to?

Currently listening to “If The World Was Ending” by Gracie and Rachel, I don’t even know if I like it yet it just came on my spotify release radar thing.

...

yeah it’s aight.

33. Last book you read?

Last book I finished was the Silmarillion. Currently working my way through Jewel’s autobiography, some book on mindfulness, and Unfinished Tales.

34. Favorite day of the week?

Honestly I’m a big fan of Sundays. They’re my bread day.

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?

Probably. Let’s not find out.

36. How do you like your coffee?

Cappuccinos are my fave but usually just strong with oatmilk and a little sugar.

37. Favorite pair of shoes?

The knee-high boots I have that lace up the back, especially since I got undue flak for em once and the spite makes it better.

38. At what time do you usually go to bed?

Time is meaningless.

39. At what time do you normally get up?

See above.

40. What do you prefer - sunrises or sunsets?

Both are nice!

41. How many blankets are on your bed?

Currently just two small soft throw blankets because it’s been hot af. One is a spiderweb one I bought in the halloween section and the other is star wars lmao.

42. Describe your kitchen plates?

Like, four matching ones that we never use, two matching ones of a different pattern, one random blue one, and a bunch of takeout container things I reuse.

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?

Nah depends on the mood. Wine is good, ciders are good, some beers are good, and I used to bartend so making fancy cocktails is also sometimes good.

44. Do you play cards?

Only when camping and it rains.

45. Can you change a tire?

On my bike sure. Someone taught me how to change a car tire once but I wouldn’t test it.

46. What is your favorite province?

Probably British Columbia.

47. Favorite job you ever had?

The one I have now! Teaching/counselling at an elementary/jr. high school :)

48. How did you get your biggest scar?

Don’t really have any big scars. I do have a small one on my face from a kid at my old job.

49. What did you do today that made someone happy?

Had some quality hangs earlier, watched a movie, cuddled, etc.

#there were only 49 I feel cheated #tag meme thing #about me #blarghe

5 notes · View notes

sunshine--temptress · 5 years

Text

Niall/Reader NSFW (Kinda, this is soft)

This was originally posted on 'Irishprinceniall', I am reposting here because I deleted this blog. Enjoy 1.5k of Niall being a tease. (For the people who also read my Narry fics, don't @ me, I know I ended one of my Narry fic the exact same way a while ago...oops!)

°•°•°•°

You had a very long day, a good friend moved in her new house and you had spent a few hours helping her clean everything, so she could finally install her new furniture. The night before you had barely slept and after spending hours cleaning the inside of cabinets you were finally home. All you wanted was food, a hot bath and cuddling with your boyfriend. You texted Niall asking if he was done in the studio and asked him if he could bring back your fave pizza on his way back. As you waited for him you prepared yourself a nice relaxing bath. You opened Spotify to find your relaxing bath playlist, lit up some candles and dropped one of your favourite bath bombs in the water.

The water felt nice and your muscles were thanking you for finally giving them a rest. You were almost asleep when you heard Niall coming home. Slowly you rose from the bath, dried yourself and put on a tank top and one of Niall's old pairs of joggers. They were soft and Niall loved you in his clothes, even ratty joggers. You decided to let you hair in the messy bun you had done to take your bath and made your way downstairs to join Nial in the living room. You knew he would be there since you rarely used the dining room unless you had guests over. You slouched next to him on the couch, and pressed a sweet kiss to his scruffy cheek you liked so much.

"I missed you," you murmured against his cheek before grabbing a slice of pizza.

You took a bite of pizza and moaned, not realising how hungry you were before. Niall looked at you and smirked. You rolled your eyes and took another bite, moaning exaggeratedly loud this time.

"Do you need some alone time with your pizza, babe? Do you want me to leave?" asked Niall, laughing at his own joke.

"Would you mind if I said yes?" you replied and Niall poked your thigh with his finger.

"I love you."

"I love you too," you said, keeping your eyes on the pizza, then you looked up at Niall, trying not to laugh you added, "oh you were talking to me."

"You're a little shit, you know that?" he asked and you nodded, trying to look serious but failing miserably when a grin appeared on your lips. You turned your head to the side and kissed Niall's cheek again.

"Don't be jealous, you know I love you almost as much as I love pizza," you laughed when Niall pouted.

"I'll remember that."

You laughed and spent the rest of the dinner talking about your respective day and Niall told you his second album was officially finished and he would be free all summer. You were so happy about it. It never bothered you Niall had to travel a lot, you knew exactly what you were doing when you got into a relationship with him but the idea of having more than just a few days together was making you very happy.

Once you finished your pizza, you took the leftovers back in the kitchen while Niall was finding something to watch on Netflix. When you came back to the living room you smiled when you saw Niall had chosen John Wick, it was one of your favourites, and he was ready to press play. Niall opened his arms for you to join him on the couch. You lay next to him and he closed his arms around your shoulders, holding you tight against his chest. Your head was pillowed against his shoulder and your hand made its way under his t-shirt, tracing slow circles on his tummy and playing with his chest hair.

It felt so great to be in Niall's arms and you slowly felt sleep creeping on you when Niall untied your hair to play with it for about thirty minutes into the movie. You loved having your hair played with but it always made you fall asleep fast. Niall noticed and he paused the movie.a

"C'mon, let's get you to bed love, we can finish the movie tomorrow if you want."

You nodded and let Niall help you get on your feet. Not letting go of your hand he lead you to your bedroom. Niall fluffed your pillow and helped you out of your sweatpants. You smiled sleepily, Niall was such an attentive boyfriend, you really didn't know how you had gotten so lucky. You took your place on the bed and watched Niall get undressed and made grabby hands toward him, making him chuckle. Niall climbed on the bed and he took you in his arms like he had done on the couch. His strong arms around you and your legs intertwined. You closed your eyes and sighed loudly. You felt so safe in Niall's arms, there was nowhere you liked to be most. Niall pressed a kiss to the side of your head and you giggled when his beard scratched your skin.

"I love you," he whispered directly against your ear, "I love you so so much. You make me happy," he kept whispering, his hand drawing circles on your back, "I don't think you know how happy you make me."

"I am so lucky to have you. You're so sweet and intelligent and pretty fit too" Niall added, "I've wanted you the first time I saw you, you're the one. I will always love you."

You loved when Niall was doing this, just whispering sweet things, sometimes he was singing until you fell asleep or if you were particularly stressed he would just remind you all the reasons why you didn't have to be. Always finding the right words to encourage you. Niall kept murmuring in your ear, his beard lightly scratching your cheek and you shivered.

"You like that, don't you? My beard against your skin, against your neck and your chest when I kiss my way down," Niall whispered and it sent another shiver down your spine.

This had rapidly taken a turn you were not expecting at all but you nodded.

"You like it against your stomach and on your thighs, between your thighs when I press kisses all over them."

You swallowed thickly and rubbed your thighs together, a move Niall didn't miss.

"You like this? You like it when I tell you everything I would do to you? I bet you're getting wet right now," he said and a small moan escaped your throat. You were definitely getting wet and feeling less and less sleepy. You wanted to turn your head and kiss Niall or push him on his back and have your way with him, riding him until your thighs burned but you also wanted him to keep whispering so you stayed still.

"If I slipped my fingers inside your underwear I'm sure I could easily push them inside of you, could I?" Niall asked and you nodded again.

Niall had barely said anything but your breath was getting shallower and your clit was aching between your legs and you tried to rub them together again but Niall was faster than you and stop your leg by putting his hand on your thigh.

"Maybe I should do just that. I don't know if you deserve it. You did say that you loved pizza more than me," he laughed.

"Please Niall," you begged because it was getting too much. You needed him now. You needed him to touch you.

"Please what?"

"Touch me," you replied, opening your legs wide, "I need it. Please."

You tried to turn around in his arms, trying to rub yourself against his thigh but again Niall kept you still with his hand.

"Not yet love, but I can keep telling you how much I want you," said Niall, rolling his hips against you, making you feel how hard he was already. "I want to taste you, I love the way you taste and all the sounds you make when you sit on my face." Niall let his fingers trailed up your thighs and you moaned again.

"Or maybe I could pin your wrists above your head and fuck you until your begging me to let you come. So many possibilities, what do you think baby?"

"Please," you whined, "I need it, please."

Niall sighed and kissed your cheek.

"You said you were tired babe. You had a long day, we should sleep and we can do that in the morning," Niall said.

You let out a frustrated sigh and pouted.

"Don't pout baby, I know you enjoy this as much as me," Niall replied and you tried to glare at him but he only smirked in response. Niall was right, you did enjoy when he was working you up like that, edging you until you couldn't take it anymore, your orgasms were always more powerful.

"Oh and don't try to slip your hand down your panties once I fall asleep because I will know if you do and then I'll have to punish you. Do you understand me?"

You nodded and closed your eyes waiting for Niall to close his eyes and fall asleep. It only took a few minutes and as soon as his breathing evened out you slipped you hand down your panties, already feeling the skin of your ass tingling with the promise of a good spanking.

#Niall imagine #Niall imagines #Niall x reader #Niall x you #Niall Horan #Niall Horan fic #Niall Horan fanfiction #Niall Horan fluff #Niall Horan smut #my writing

121 notes · View notes

emiliachrstine · 4 years

Text

for @iron-parkr: this one-shot has been sitting in my drafts for a few weeks. I wanted to make rewrite it but couldn’t think of a different idea. It’s not my fave but I really love these two together. My first Jackie and Maggie one-shot! Sorry it’s not the best, I haven’t written anything for Jackie in a while!

“Have you spoken to Dad recently?”

Jacqueline stared blankly into the fridge, the particular smell of expired food assaulted her nose. Her eyes fixed on the culprit. A container holding leftover pizza the team had ordered almost two weeks ago. It had been sitting in the fridge, completely forgotten during the whole Accords fiasco. “No, I haven’t,” Jacqueline responded, having remembered that Maggie had just inquired about Tony. She pulled the container out from the fridge and disposed of it in the trashcan.

“When was the last time you saw him.”

The question made an ache form in Jacqueline’s throat. She turned back to the fridge and pulled out a beer. The last time she saw Tony was at a rundown motel in Berlin. It was the location Steve had given her, the place he would meet her once he returned from Siberia. Tony managed to track her, no surprise there. And the following conversation--it was actually a bitter argument--was enough to bring tears to her eyes. Her words to him which were brash and incredibly harsh, made her suck in a quick breath as she recalled them. She took a moment, taking several deep breaths, then turned to Maggie, who was sitting at the kitchen island, Jacqueline was caught off guard by her wide eyes. “Berlin.” She finally answered and unscrewed the beer cap. “Last time I saw him was in Berlin.”

The answer was incredibly vague. Jacqueline couldn’t even look at Maggie when the words left her mouth. The teenager watched her Aunt closely, she looked exhausted and, she wouldn’t say it out loud, but she looked like absolute shit. Jacqueline had just gotten back to New York a few days ago. Last Maggie had heard she was being detained in Virginia to be questioned by Secretary Ross about Steve’s whereabouts. Pepper pulled some strings and got Jacqueline released. Maggie tapped her fingers against the counter, the topic of Steve was poking at her mind incessantly. “Do you know where Steve went?”

Jacqueline stared down at the bottle, tracing her finger along the rim. A sudden wave of nausea washed over her. She closed her eyes and swallowed back the discomfort. “No.” She raised the beer to her mouth and took a drink when a warning blared through her ears. Jacqueline quickly pulled the beer away, the liquid spilling out of her mouth. “Fuck!” She turned to the sink and spit put the drink, thankful that she didn’t swallow any of it. The fucking baby. She thought to herself as she poured the beer down the sink drain. How could she fucking forget?

“Are you okay, Aunt Jackie?” It wasn’t like her to waste a drink like that.

Shit. Jacqueline placed the empty beer bottle in the sink and slowly turned, her fingers wiped at her mouth. Should she tell Maggie about the baby? Logically, there was no point in keeping it from her. Maggie was smart, it won’t take her long to put the pieces together. Still, Jacqueline didn’t know what she was going to do about the pregnancy. But she knew that she didn’t have much time left if she wanted to go down a certain route. Another round of nausea came over her, it was stronger this time. The dizziness followed soon after. Jacqueline pressed one hand against the counter behind her, the other rested against her stomach.

Come on, kid. Please calm down.

The sight worried the teenager. “Aunt Jackie?”

Fuck. “It’s okay, Maggie” When she opened her eyes, the sheer concern on Maggie’s face was almost enough to break her. “I’m pregnant.”

Okay, that wasn’t what Maggie was expecting to hear. “Oh my god,” the words fell past her lips, giving Maggie no time to stop them. A ghost of a smile appeared. “You’re pregnant?”

Jacqueline saw the smile and the faint glint of excitement in her eyes, but she only shook her head. “Please, don’t get excited.”

Maggie’s mood immediately deflated. “Oh… I didn’t know you and Steve were planning on having a kid.”

“We weren’t.”

“Oh.”

That’s why Jacqueline looked so tired. Maggie couldn’t imagine the amount of stress she must be under. With Peggy’s death, the Accords splitting the group, and Steve going on the run, it was amazing how she has managed to keep herself together. Then, a sharp pang in her heart. Steve should be here with her. They should be going to doctor’s appointments, getting the nursery ready. There was so much that had to be done… and he wasn’t here. She felt her stomach sink. “Did Steve know?”

Jacqueline nodded. “I told him when we were in Berlin.”

The sickening feeling in Maggie’s stomach soon flared with anger. “He knew you were pregnant and left anyways?” The teenager was up on her feet, eyes ablaze and adrenaline coursing through her veins. She was already angry at Steve, then to add this on top of it all. “What the fuck,”

“Maggie, please,” Jacqueline tiredly rubbed a hand down her face. “I don’t want to get into it right now.”

Maggie exhaled and allowed herself to calm. Another time then. She walked around the island and went to stand next to her Aunt. “I’m sorry.”

“God,” Jacqueline wanted to cry, she really did. But everything felt so numb. She was too tired to cry. “I’m so scared, Maggie. I don’t know what I’m going to do or if I’m going to keep it. I just don’t know what I should do.”

Crossing her arms over her chest, the teenager casted a timid glance at Jacqueline. “You’re great with kids,” she hesitated but relaxed when she saw her smile a bit. “You’re great with me and you have been ever since I was a kid.”

“You’re different.”

“How?”

Jacqueline looked over at her niece and huffed out a laugh, “You’re not my kid, Maggie. You’re Tony’s. It’s different when it comes to my own child.”

“Well, you’ve always been great with me and I turned out great, so I think that says something.” Despite being her Aunt Jackie, she very much became like a mother to Maggie, long before Pepper came into the picture. Jacqueline took the young kid to the park and zoo, often took her shopping for new clothes and shoes. Maggie even went with Jacqueline and her father John up to Lake Oneida on their annual camping trips. She was very much Jacqueline’s kid, in every sense of the word. “Who else knows about the baby?”

“Steve, Alex, Sharon, my mother… and you.” She gave Maggie a small nudge in the arm that was followed by a smile.

Maggie returned it, feeling a little special that she was one of the first few to know. “Dad doesn’t know?”

“No, I wanted to tell him in Berlin but the last conversation we had ended with me telling him to fuck off.” And Jacqueline was quite sure that she and Tony wouldn’t be speaking any time soon. Everything was still too fresh, too raw. She didn’t have the stomach to face him, not right now. “The fewer people who know, the better. If I do end up keeping this kid, I’m gonna need to protect them. Ross is already suspicious of my relationship with Steve and if he finds out I have a kid… who knows what he would do.” She huffed out a breath. “The first kid to be born a super soldier, can you imagine what they would want to do?” She could feel Maggie tense. “Especially with the Accords, no, he’s not getting anywhere near my kid.”

Maggie couldn’t help but nod her head in agreement. “I’m gonna make sure he doesn’t get near this kid.” This baby was going to be part of her family. A little cousin, something she’s always wanted. “I know you’re scared but you won’t be alone. You have your mom, Alex, and I know things are tense but you have Dad too. And you have me,” she finished with a bright smile. “I’ll babysit for you and I’ll charge you a small fee.”

“What, I don’t get the family discount of a free service?”

Maggie shrugged, “Listen, I expect to be paid for any service I may provide.”

Jacqueline laughed, this time it was a genuine, hearty laugh. Something she hadn’t done in a few weeks. She wrapped her arm around Maggie’s shoulders and pulled her close. The teenager wrapped her arms around Jacqueline’s waist, her head snuggled against her chest. For a moment, Jacqueline thought about what it would be like to hold her own child. To feel their arms wrapped around her in a tight hold, to feel all the love they had to offer. It made her stomach jump with excitement. The first time it’s happened since finding out she was pregnant. Maybe this could all work out. It wasn’t going to be easy but Maggie was right. She wasn’t alone. She had people who will be more than happy to help. To help keep her kid safe and protected. Even though the situation between them wasn’t ideal, Jacqueline knew that Tony would do anything to make sure her kid was safe. No matter what transpired between them.

She rested her cheek on the top of Maggie’s head and squeezed her a little tighter, “Love you, Pip.”

“Love you too.”

#ch:jacqueline lewis #crossover:maggie stark #ros***#i hope i did maggie well #i'll cry if i didn't #i love her so much

5 notes · View notes

scruffyhappaboreherder · 5 years

Text

On the Basis of

Aroace ficlet for my other fave SW ship, Finnrey, to go with the one I did for rebelcaptain. Modern AU, college AU, teacher/student involving another ship mentioned but not shown.

Finn stopped to check himself in the hallway mirror before he went out the door. Maybe he looked funny in the Hawaiian-style shirt featuring the college mascot, even (especially?) combined with rough linen trousers, but he was hoping it would make Rey laugh, so that was all right. They were both recent thrifting finds she hadn't seen yet.

He stopped on the way to her place to pick up their usual huge order of Chinese. Rey lived in a quiet neighborhood out of delivery range of most of the campus restaurants; he lived just off campus. Friday nights were frenzied and raucous, even during the summer, and somehow watching movies with Rey as part of a class on the history of military films had turned into regular movie nights.

It was just for fun: Finn's major concentration was in military history, and Rey was planning to specialize in British history, with a minor in film and a sideline as a textile historian if she could get away with it. So she liked to watch films with period costumes, where period was any time before the 1990s. Maybe she'd get a paper out of it somehow. In the meantime, they both got to unwind and keep moderately current on pop culture, or deepen their knowledge of the classics.

He biked over to Rey's with the takeout in the basket, bungeed into place in case of dooring or lose rocks or any other hazards. He paused after a few blocks to get on the sidewalk long enough to stow the shirt in the basket too: it wasn't breathing as well as he'd hoped, and he didn't want to spend the whole night in a sweaty shirt.

Once he was on her doorstep, he pulled the shirt back on. While he was seeing nothing but the inside of his shirt, he heard the door open.

"Let me help you with the—oh," said Rey. Apparently she'd heard him arrive, or seen him, and not waited for him to ring the bell.

"One second. Just trying to avoid a wardrobe malfunction," he told her.

"That shirt is a wardrobe malfunction all on its own. I think my eyes are burning." But she was smiling as she undid the bungee cords and grabbed two bags of food. He wheeled the bike into the foyer, locked the door behind him, and grabbed the other bag.

They sat down at her little kitchen table. Two plates were ready and waiting; they served themselves family-style. Rey ate with chopsticks; he went with plasticware. In between bites, they caught up on department gossip. The TA for the class where they'd met had actually succeeded in getting a visiting professor to go out for a drink with him; Rey was less shocked that Poe had managed this than that he wanted to.

"It's maybe not the smartest move," Finn conceded. "But it's not like Professor Skywalker is on his thesis committee or something. So it may raise some eyebrows, but it'll pass."

"I don't know. Jessika and Karé told me that Professor Holdo was kind of torqued off." Rey grabbed another dumpling and stuffed it into her mouth. "And she is on his thesis committee. So who knows."

Finn grimaced. "Well, shit."

"Sometimes I wonder if it was a good idea to make friends with the graduate students," Rey added. "Maybe we'd be better off not knowing about all the gossiping and politics."

"As opposed to finding out about it when we were already graduate students? No way," Finn countered. "Did you ever hear the saying that the politics in academia are so vicious because the stakes are so small? I think we may be seeing that in action."

"Because politics in the rest of the world are so kindly right now," Rey said irritably.

"You got me there," Finn admitted. "But let's not talk about that. What are we watching?"

"Not talking about that might be a problem. I got that Ruth Bader Ginsburg movie."

"The documentary, or the other one?"

"The other one. I just want to kick back and watch something from when women wore dresses and skirts all the time. But not completely crazy frou-frou impractical dresses."

"Got it." He surveyed the table. They'd emptied most of the containers. "Want me to do cleanup while you start the movie?"

"Sure. Thanks." She went into the other room, and he got up and started pitching the empties into the trash. Leftovers went into the fridge, and he washed the dishes even though Rey had said before that he didn't have to. It made him twitchy to know that they were just sitting there unwashed while they were watching a movie.

When he was done, he followed Rey into the living room and sat next to her. She hit play, and he watched with only minor moments of secondhand embarrassment as the movie unfolded.

"Thanks for not being like that," Rey said, after one of these.

"Hm?"

Rey hit pause. "All hormones and backseats."

Finn waved vaguely in the direction of his bike. "You can't have that problem when your main mode of conveyance doesn't have a back seat."

Rey smiled. "I was thinking, though ... we could snuggle. If you want."

"Um, okay. Like how?"

"I want to be the big spoon."

He grinned at her. "I can work with that." He stood up, and she stretched out on the couch; he laid down in front of her, and she put an arm around him, gently tugging him closer. They watched like that until the movie ended.

#finnrey #all my faves are aro and or ace for pride #idk why #my fanfic #my posts #i might write a coda for this one #it went in a different direction than i expected #so i stopped there #also because i'm captain last minute #the end of june came sooner than i expected

5 notes · View notes

onebrokegirlworld-blog · 4 years

Text

Ok, I have to admit, I have a obsessive passion for Disney! Movies, theme parks, trivia, memorabilia, you name it, I’m there!

This obsession started at a very young age, and even extended that obsession to getting one of my first jobs at Disney, working as a merchandise acquisition manager for The Disney Store in the early 90s in British Columbia when, what we affectionately call “The Company”, was setting up Disney Stores throughout Western Canada.

Sadly, I left The Company after a short but extremely enjoyable tenure, I’d go back to The Company in a second!

Why am I bringing this up now? Because it’s been snowing where I live in Maple Ridge, British Columbia. It’s been snowing A LOT! A lot more than we usually get in just a few days. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE snow! But <sigh> I do long for the forthcoming days of Spring with it’s warmer climes and blooming season. But right now, it’s cold and wet. And checking The Weather Network, Anaheim CA is currently a nice mostly sunny day at 17C degrees today.

So I’ve found myself armchair vacationing in my favorite place on the planet, Disneyland!! The original! Never to be duplicated, theme park that set the tone for generations of individuals and families to come. And having been a part of the traditions of the Walt Disney Company, I’m proud to say that I was a part of the magic.

So speaking of traditions, I’m going to segue into some little known trivia about the Walt Disney Company and Disneyland. I would venture to guess that there are millions of trivia facts and websites out there that have tons of trivia tidbits. I’ve probably read all of them!

The feral cats at night, the exclusive Club 33 (booze IN Disneyland anyone?? LOL), secret scents pumped into public areas to entice or enhance your experience, Walt’s secret on site apartment, secret menu items, the story behind Jingles the horse on King Arthur’s Carousel, the list goes on and on!

So I’m going to share some of the lesser known ones and some of my all time faves!

The first, traditions has two meanings in the Walt Disney Company. One, when you get hired by Disney, you go through an orientation process called “Traditions”. It’s where you learn about The Company, it’s history, values, all the groundwork that you, as a new employee (a Cast Member) need to share the magic with our customers, which we call Guests! <Insert Be Our Guest song here LOL> Disney makes use extensively of movie and theatre terminology in it’s references to almost every aspect of The Company.

The second part about Traditions are things that The Company does differently from everyone else that set them apart. And let’s face it, Disney is HUGE! And they wouldn’t be that way if they just followed everyone else’s lead. Traditions are tried and true processes or procedures that make The Company so successful time and time again. They are all based on simple principles that Walt himself thought were important and differentiated the way he did business from everyone else.

When you work for Disney, everyone, from the CEO to the entry level Cast member, wears a name tag. It always just has your first name on it. This was something that was important to Walt. He disliked being called Mr. Disney and encouraged everyone to use first names only. It imparted a casual feeling in The Company and helped to make everyone feel that they were part of the same family. The name tag has same shape across every branch of The Company and it’s appearance only varies dependent on what branch of The Company you work for (The Disney Store, Disneyland, Walt Disney World, etc etc etc LOL)

K, my niche that I fell in love with was theme park secrets. Every time I go to Disneyland I load up on theme park secrets and try to seek them out. It’s like a treasure hunt that makes, for me, the experience more enjoyable and rewarding... plus I’m a history nut anyway!

So, a couple little known Disneyland secrets..

One, the test brick wall.

During the construction of Disneyland, Disney Imagineers (an affectionate title of anyone involved in the creative processes of Disney) built a wall of bricks just off Main Street USA on the east side of the street, just past the locker area.

When Disney Imagineers were testing facades for Main Street USA, they tested two brick combinations, a very straight and symmetrical construction, or a more rustic haphazard looking assembly. The symmetrical look won out but the test wall is still there.

There is a lot of speculation as to why the wall was left there, some say that it would have cost more to take it down than leave it up, others say that the Imagineers left it there as a homage to future Guests as a part of Disneyland history.

My next favorite Disneyland secret, Doritos were invented in Disneyland!

It’s true! And talk about a match made in heaven! Yes, the ‘other’ finger lickin’ good treat we love was invented right in Disneyland.

in 1955, one of the original Disneyland restaurants, Casa de Fritos (owned by the predecessor of the Fritos brand) also sold tortillas, Fritos were insanely more popular (remember this is 1955 and the US is still barely getting it’s feet wet with international foods) and at the end of the day, the unconsumed tortillas were simply tossed.

Until one of the chefs decided to come up with a tasty, cheesy seasoning blend, fry the leftover tortillas and serve them as a snack. The Guests went mad for these salty-savory snacks and as they say, the rest is history!

More about the story is here,

http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2013/08/the-man-credited-with-inventing-doritos-had-the-chips-sprinkled-over-his-grave/

Ok here’s my last for today, it’s not a big one but it’s pretty cool!

If you ride the Monorail in Disneyland (the current model in use in 2020 was built by Bombardier in Quebec, way to go Canada!), you can ride in the cockpit!

There’s no special fee, or secret handshake, and this is a perk you can get without being an annual passholder, is when you get to the departure platform, ask the platform Cast Member if you can ride in the cockpit, that’s it!!! It’s a little known secret and with other guests simply wanting to get from A to B and back to A as fast as possible, this is a special Disney moment that gets overlooked.

If no one has made the request before your trip, the Cast Member will walk you right to the front cockpit door (whilst everyone else waits to get on and wonders why YOU are so special), enters a code on the door ans swoosh! It opens to a very spacious and simply cockpit with bench seating along the windows and a pilot at the controls. You simply need to just ask and the pilot will show you the controls and let you blast the horn at the right moment! And then you can sit back and enjoy the ride from a very unique vantage point!

EVERY time I have asked to do this, I have been able to ride up front! The same works for the Mark Twain riverboat. Just as one of the dock Cast Members to ride in the wheelhouse and just the like monorail, you’ll get to enjoy a classic Disney attraction from a viewpoint that not many Guests get to see!

Well, that’s if for today! As we say in The Company, ‘Have a Disney Day!’

-jenn <3

#Disney Disneyland Cast Member Disney Store Walt Mickey Backstage

0 notes

lafillederenard · 6 years

Note

all the questions!

Thank you, Kate! I’ve been going through these slowly for a while now. Here are the first 50 questions to the ask post found here: x

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

I pour more milk than is needed and feel wasteful when there’s milk leftover in the bowl. Sometimes I drink the milk and feel better. Usually I don’t even eat cereal though? I’m a wakey wakey eggs and bakey gal.

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

Love that crisp cold winter air! Sure would like to feel it sometime soon! Right now at school, it’s almost like I can feel the weather slowly shifting to cold winter air weather.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

I often just use scraps of paper that are handy. I’ll use a pen or pencil if I’m switching between reading and writing. And I’ve used my phone a couple of times.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

I like really sweet and flavored drinks when going out for either. For coffee from scratch, I like to add a lot of creamer, preferably flavored.

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

I used to be more so before. Now, not so much, but it has become a habit for me to smile with a closed mouth for pictures.

6: do you keep plants?

I try to, but it never seems to end well. 2 of my 4 succulents I had in my dorm room were stolen recently when I left them out. The other two I’ve been ignoring. I’m much better at taking care of my virtual plants on the app Viridi.

7: do you name your plants?

I’ve named a couple of my real plants, but I don’t really care to for the most part. Most of my plants in Viridi have a stupid meme name.

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

Music and writing. I haven’t been journaling as often as I used to, but I still consider it a big way I like to process my emotions: by writing down as much as I can.

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

Yeah. I get self-conscious though, sometimes even when no one is around to hear.

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

I like to sleep on my stomach, and can pretty much only fall asleep that way. But I sometimes switch to my side during the night.

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

I don’t know if I can think of anything specifically that actually really applies so I’m just gonna pick some stuff…. High school friends will probably laugh if I mention how we all agree I have pretty good aim with my vomit….and college friends, well they call me the Cheese-It Harpy. Friends, let me know if you’re reading this and you think of something else.

12: what’s your favorite planet?

I don’t have a favorite planet. I’m very appreciative of space and I know basic astrology with the planets, but somehow I just don’t have a fave.

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

I did my friend’s hair up pretty and she liked it and another friend liked it.

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

It’s gonna have vines on the walls outside and there’s a courtyard maybe and the apartment will have yellow painted walls and the window will look out over the street and we’ll put up lots of string lights and small plants. I really want to make those tiny tiny gardens with the little benches in them and stuff. And the kitchen sink will usually have dishes in it bc I’m/we’re not people who wash our dishes right away. There will be original and purchased art on the walls.

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

So apparently CalTech astronomers think there might be a big planet way out past Pluto, technically in our solar system.

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?

UM I love all pasta but I will pick lasagna as my favorite almost all the time. I really love a baked ziti covered in mozzarella tho

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

So I don’t really want to dye my hair, but if I did, legit I would want it to be opalescent (silvery-white with pastel colors). Opals are my birthstone, and you bet that my hair would look like that if I was a Crystal Gem. But I don’t really think I’d be able to pull that off irl.

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

So yeah, so my CV squad is always gonna remember me throwing up into the cup holder of the RENTAL car. My college friends…there’s probably so many but I’m blanking and can only think of when I spilled the cappuccino….or when I was tired and they put plastic lizards on my head and I got emotional bc I felt loved LOL. Idk help me out here guys Idk why I’m forgetting. I need to write down more of the things I do.

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

I keep a writing journal at all times, and it’s basically a regular journal/diary where I write what happened, how I’m feeling.I also have a gratitude journal. I try to write in there as often as I can about things I am grateful for on that particular day, like compliments I may have received, or nice things that happened.

20: what’s your favorite eye color?

Brown. Almost everyone I’ve ever crushed on has had brown eyes. Brown eyes are beautiful!

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

Favorite bag??? I don’t use bags, lol. I got my backpack. I’m not terribly attached to it.

22: are you a morning person?

Nope! My sleep schedule may be really messed up, but either way, I love being up and doing things at night. I really like to take my time waking up in the morning; I’m pretty slow about it.

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

The thing I usually end up doing is bumming around the computer, tumblr and all. My favorite thing, though, would probably be to watch a really good movie or two, or to gather a pile of books and read through them all, like I used to do when I was little. I also really like to sleeeeeeep

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

Not really. There are some things that I just don’t talk about with anyone.

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

I’ve broken into very few places. One of them is the toilet paper dispenser in the slightly scary bathroom downstairs in the campus center.

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

This is basically all my shoes, as I kinda just find one pair of shoes I really like, and wear them every day until they get destroyed. I really liked my San Antonio Shoes that I wore to band. Several people complimented me on them. They seemed to fit really great. They were some good shoes. If I ever have the money, I might buy another pair sometime. The pair I had were bought ridiculously under-priced at a thrift store.

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

I really like fruity gum. Fruit Stripe is my favorite chewing gum, but my favorite legit bubble-blowing bubblegum is the cotton candy bubblicious. It’s blue and super sugary and I have distinct memories of times when I chewed it, or wanted to be chewing it but was chewing something else, lol

28: sunrise or sunset?

Sunset is my favorite time. Since I do a lot at night, it’s not really a sad symbol of my day ending, but the night beginning. Whereas if I am seeing the sunrise, that probably means I’ve stayed up all night, which probably was questionably smart to do….

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

I have a friend who kisses my hand to show affection, and I think it’s really cute and nice.

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

I’ve never had any bone-chilling moments — no ghosts, home intruders, etc. But I have been genuinely scared of whether or not me and my family would be okay.

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

I don’t really like the look of fuzzy socks, but I like how it feels to go to sleep in them. I prefer not to wear socks to bed, but my feet get cold often and I can’t fall asleep if my feet are cold. I’ve got a growing collection of socks with foxes on them, but I kinda prefer to wear plain socks. I feel like it’s immature to wear colorful socks.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

I can’t recall anything exciting happening. We’ve gone out for food. Had a microwave macaroni party…

33: what’s your fave pastry?

Ooh. I can’t think of anything specific. I like stuff with cherries, or maybe like a cheese danish. I’m not picky!

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

When I was really little I had Silly Bear. He was purple or something, and wore a jester’s hat, I think. I used him to make my brother laugh for the first time. Then I had Maple the bunny. She was the most beautiful bunny, until we put her in the wash and then the dryer. Now, I have my fox. It doesn’t have a name, it’s just my fox. I’m sorry to say that my fox went in the dryer, too. My mom told me it would be okay, and it wasn’t. It’s fur is all messed up, but it’s still cute and I love it. Makes me wish I had kept Maple the bunny. And yeah, I sleep with my fox most nights.

35: do you like stationery and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

Ughhhh yeah my favorite is designer notebooks that are all pretty. Blank paper is enticing to me. I used to really like pencils that were colorful or had designs on them, too, but I’ve actually made the switch to pens now. I never thought I would switch to pens because I make so many mistakes, or I used to. I prefer my pens to be comfy and write nicely, rather than to look good. Pencils that write nice and dark are very important to me. But yeah I love stationery, and I always have to visit the stationery aisle whenever I go to the drugstore.

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

So lately, I think my mood has been sort of like Norah Jones or Corinne Bailey Rae. Kinda soft and sad, but nice. At least, that’s how I want my mood to be. Less the sad part though, just kinda soft and nice. Tryin not to stress out over finals.

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

Definitely messy, but an organized messy. I want to know where everything is, and I want to be able to function and move around in the room, but I love having little figurines and papers all over my desk and stuff.

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

Well, as an English major, I have many grammar pet peeves. I hate it when people put recyclables in the trash. I dunno what else…

39: what color do you wear the most?

I wear a lot of blue because it looks good on me. Matches my eyes. I am gaining an increasing number of maroon-/burgundy-colored clothes. I don’t like to wear gray clothes.

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you?

I don’t wear jewelry. Let me tell you about my Two Cats On a Couch instead. They’re made of painted wood; two cats, one striped, and one in some kind of clothing. They are on a red couch with white dots and yellow flowers. The cat in the clothes is me, and the other cat is someone to talk to. My mom found the cats at a thrift store and said she got them for me because she wanted me to always have someone to talk to. They were the last gift I ever received from her, as she gave them to me shortly before she passed away.

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

One of the last books I remember liking a lot is The Mysterious Benedict Society by Trenton Lee Stewart. I read it about four years ago, and it was meant for a younger age group than mine even back then, but I remember it really resonating with me. It also totally hyped me up for a good test experience when I was about to take the SAT, because I read about the kids taking the test in the book right before I went to take the SAT, and it made me excited to rock a test.

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

I wish I had a favorite shop, but I don’t get out much and I usually take things to go places. There are several coffee shops in the area, but the independent ones are kinda new and kinda less comfy, and more minimalist, at least from what I’ve noticed. I can tell you about Norm’s, though, because I could definitely say that it’s a favorite spot of mine. My larp club at college, AOKP, goes to Norm’s every other Thursday or so. We have this big table in the corner that we usually sit at. I steal crayons from the basket on the front counter. My friend once left a big pile of sand in the bathroom because she didn’t clean herself off before we left the beach. I’d say that Norm’s has become a special place for me.

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

Alice, this one is you! The last time I really watched the stars, alone or not, was when we went to the beach to watch the sunrise. That was a good time.

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

Thanksgiving break was emotionally rough for me, but there was one afternoon when everything seemed really pretty, and the sun was real good, and all the plants were good, almost like they were giving off a vibe, and I just sat outside for maybe an hour and wrote in my journal, and started to feel really calm and good. I don’t even remember what I was thinking about, I’d have to check in my journal. That time just felt really good, from what I remember.

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

I would say that I do try to intuit a lot of things, but I maybe have a hard time trusting myself or what I’m feeling. I’m trying to learn to recognize when I’m ignoring a feeling that is telling me to do or not to do something.

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

I like this joke, cuz English: A rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

I don’t think people should be eating balut (duck embryos), and I’m pretty sure the smell alone of coconut shrimp has the power to make me throw up in an instant.

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

I think it is the same. I just kinda always am afraid of, instead of a comfy life, being alone and not having money or food and not being okay. Especially the alone part.

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

I really don’t buy or even use CDs anymore, since I was little. We didn’t have internet in the house when I was a kid, so all the music we listened to, we played on a boombox. It could do CDs and tapes. My mom had a small collection, and we rented a bunch of stuff from the public library. The sound on the boombox got messed up eventually, and by that time I had access to the internet, so now it’s streaming and Youtube.

50: what’s an odd thing you collect?

I have a collection from, like, late elementary and middle school, of pencils that I used until they got really heckin small. I’m talking, you can barely write with the dang thing. One of these pencils is a colored pencil that is one of the best shades of my favorite color (neon orange) that I’ve ever seen.

#ask

1 note · View note

kinetic-elaboration · 7 years

Text

October 8: Art Festival ‘17

Ah this weekend. This weekend was so exhausting. And I have to go to work tomorrow and a part of me is looking forward to it because I am very much a creature of habit and I miss my routine and my regular hours, but another part of me just low-key dreads it because I feel like I was waiting a million years for my vacation and now it’s over and it’s like where did it go?! Also I hate getting up early. I don’t have a literal sleep deficit but I still feel like I do.

Overall...I enjoyed this year’s art festival. Some of my favorite artists from last year weren’t there, and in general I thought there was less weird stuff this year--less mixed media or large-scale art or just “wow what is this strange thing” stuff.

There were some very striking/memorable things. Nicario Jimenez was back--he was my favorite last year and this. Also Eugene Perry, another one of my faves from last year. There was one fellow (Matthew Leavell) with gigantic brightly colored space plants and an artist team from Richmond with some very disturbing metalwork sculptures that I loved. Victor Edwards was exhibiting probably the most comfortable chairs I’ve ever experienced in my life and I want one except where I would put it. Also I don’t want to knock photography/paintings/jewelry/sculpture because I saw amazing things in those categories too: C.W. Banfield’s photography (I wanted a print of an enchanted-looking forest but I also want to not spend all my money so), and Zbigniew Chojnacki and Mary May’s jewelry, for example. Bryan Yung was another artist whose work I would have gotten a print of if I had infinite money. (Well I mean if I had infinite money I’d be buying originals but still.)

Also I felt like this year there were more artists willing to sell to people who aren’t very rich. Last year there was literally no affordable jewelry. I know because I love necklaces and will splurge (within reason, like $100 and under) for something I really love that is in a style I will definitely wear. And only maybe 3 or 4 painters/photographers who were selling prints in addition to their original work. I think I picked up a Halloween card for my mom from an artist who worked with paper. But generally if you weren’t willing to drop a grand or more there was nothing for you. This year, pretty much everyone who could sell their work in smaller/cheaper form was doing so. I mean obviously if you make giant statutes or furniture, it is what it is. But there were a lot of things I could have afforded and that was nice.

Anyway, still, all told, it’s been such a tiring weekend.

The last two days have been good, I’m not saying I didn’t have fun. I just feel like I kind of haven’t stopped in the last 48 hours.. On Saturday, my mom and I went to the arts festival in the morning, looked down the first row of booths, had lunch (at the cafe place where we had the staff luncheon a couple of weeks ago--the food was better this time and I still love the atmosphere), went down a second row of booths, and then went to the tea store and then to get some ridiculously rich ice cream. Took the bus back to my apartment, sat around a bit at my parents’ hotel with my dad, watching the news and not moving, then went out to dinner at the Italian place. Even though I wasn’t terribly hungry but I have lots of leftovers for tomorrow so that’s good. Also went grocery shopping.

Today we were supposed to take it easier but really we did not lol. We started out looking at the last row of booths, then took a break to get some sub-par iced coffees at the B&N bookstore, and then re-visted some of the best booths and got some art. (I got a print from ZL Feng, an artist I’d really liked last year but hadn’t bought anything from, and my mom and I both got space-themed mugs from these folks, and I also picked up a magnet from Elginia McCrary.) We got sandwiches for lunch and then took a walk through cw and finally ended up going home on the last bus, around 5:30. We all went out to an early, easy dinner, and then back to my apartment to get some chore stuff out of the way. And somehow now it’s past 9:30 and I still gotta shower.

#the year 2017 #2017: rl

1 note · View note

seraphichan · 7 years

Text

the first lines of my last 20 fics

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 fics (or however many you have altogether) and see if there are any patterns. Then, tag some of your fave authors.

tagged by the ever lovely @kiokushitaka ! thank you <3 (and sorry this took me so long - i am the worst)

i’ll tag @mongoose-bite @generatorcat @pinkheichou @fairylights101 @agent-2-6 and anyone else who might like to give this a go

Reciprocate

There weren’t many things that surprised Moblit anymore. Working under Hange had made him immune to the shock of the uncertain and unknown. But that didn’t mean there still weren’t some things that managed to catch him off guard.

Like when Levi said

“Sure.”

Moblit was joking when he had asked if Levi wanted to go out drinking with him. He expected a curt “No”, accompanied by a disgusted scowl, as that was what anyone else ever got. Even Erwin, on those rare nights he wasn’t cooped up in his office, was rebuffed time and again.

Alow/Lethargic

Jean had planned to go to the gallery. It was opening exhibition night for him and a handful of other students. It was bad manners - and bad self-promotion - not to go, but Jean was so fucking tired from finishing the projects in his showcase, and then setting them up, that he decided: Fuck it. He was going to go to bed. He would have been dead on his feet had he gone anyway.

He was enjoying some quality shut-eye until his dorm door slammed open and jolted him awake.

“Sorry.”

That was Levi’s voice. Jean would recognize it anywhere. He was almost always with Eren; they were near inseparable as a couple.

Defile/Hummock/Slough

“Alright! Everyone line up! It’s time for lunch!”

There are screams and shouts and what sounds like a herd of tiny buffalo as the kids abandon whatever they are doing on the playground and run towards Petra and Levi. Once they are all in order - or as orderly as a bunch of first graders will get anyway - Petra marches them inside, single file. Levi stands to the side and counts them as they pass.

Twenty...twenty-one...twenty-two…

Levi frowns. They’re missing one.

(oops, this got waaaaay long, so check out the rest under the cut~!)

Cartographer/Orientate

For all the hell they went through, the defeat of the titans came quickly enough. It was...odd. The world as they knew it had effectively come to an end and they were left with nothing but the question

“What now?”

Eren looked at Jean. He didn’t have an answer for him. The walls were gone, taken down bit by bit, titan by titan. Eren was so tired. He wanted to sleep, but at the same time he felt too restless to do it.

“Well,” Armin piped up from between them, “we spent so much time fighting to live. Now we can actually do it.”

Pittance/Factoid/Junket

Mike did well. Levi half believed he had punched Erwin after all. And Erwin took his supposed beating quite gracefully. Whoever that Hange person was, they knew how to write a speech. It made Erwin sound noble for persevering through this hardship, and it gave him a chance to reiterate his intent to clean up crime in the city, should he be elected.

Of course, Lobov dealt with that in a press conference of his own. He came on a mere hour after Erwin, slander dripping from his tongue.

“--a fake attack meant to get him sympathy votes and nothing more--”

If Lobov hadn’t already shelled out the money, Levi would have been worried he had actually figured out it was fake. But, as it was, it just made the statement hilarious to Levi.

Tatterdemalion

The trek up the mountain was as arduous as he remembered, but Erwin was prepared for what was at the peak this time.

Or so he hoped.

The price for a spell was not clear cut. There was no starting cost based on the nature and power of it, or how it might be used. There was only estimation and uncertainty.

The first time Erwin came he did not realize this. He had brought a sack of gold, thinking that currency would be an acceptable currency. Levi - or The Tiny Witch as most people called him, though Erwin was certain he shouldn’t call Levi that to his face - had sneered at him and told him to leave. Perplexed, Erwin went back down the mountain. Was it not enough? He returned a few days later with double the gold and was met with the same reaction.

Eighty-six

“The usual?” Hunk asks him when he comes in.

Lance supposes he should be more concerned that he has a regular order at the fast food restaurant on the college campus, but considering the perks - frequent discounts on his food and access to the company’s private, password protected wi-fi so he gets faster internet - he can’t seem to find a reason to be concerned at all.

“Yeah,” he answers, digging out a few crumpled bills from his pocket and laying them on the counter.

“Rough day?” Hunk asks as he takes the money and taps in Lance’s order.

Ambiguous

Levi’s phone pinged and he dug it out of his pocket, tapped at the notification and opened his email. It was an e-vite to Erwin’s birthday party. Hange already knew Levi was coming - he had helped them book the hotel for the occasion just a few days prior - but he supposed this was his official invitation. He replied with a Of course I’m coming, you shitstain, then scrolled to the bottom in search of the most important information.

What the fuck to take.

He had asked Hange to list some ideas so he could attempt to get a decent present for once - he was abysmal at gift giving, tending to go for things that were boring and practical over exciting and inventive.

Levi stopped scrolling when he saw “gift ideas” and pursed his lips in disappointment when he read the message:

Bring something nice! :)

Hyperbole

Levi sneers at the bowl Kenny sets before him. “This looks so bad it’s already giving me the shits.”

“Listen hear, you little cuss, you said you were hungry so I made you dinner.” It’s only defrosted and reheated leftovers of some questionable casserole the old lady downstairs made Kenny nearly a year ago, but still. It’s something. “And it looks just fine,” Kenny grumbles.

“If I eat it, I’ll probably die. Do you want to kill me?”

“Getting close.”

Vaticination

Erwin should have seen this coming, but hindsight, as they say, is twenty-twenty.

The plan was: the more decorated officers he brought, the more admirable the Survey Corps would seem, and the more funding they would potentially get from the nobility. Of course the plan didn’t work if all of his most decorated officers were either too anti-social or too in-your-face.

Widdershins/Snaffle

There was the sound of a doorbell and Armin lifted his head, watched as the security guard swung around in his chair and looked at the monitor on the desk by the door. He stood and pressed the button, and in walked Armin’s dad.

“Hello,” he greeted the guard, “I received a call about Armin Arlert?”

“You the dad?” the guard asked.

“Yes,” he smiled. “Erwin Smith.” He held out his hand.

Napery

When Erwin came home Levi was ironing the table linen.

It’s not as if that never happened, but normally the only time it did was after washing them and before using them, which was only around the holidays. It was August now, nothing of note in sight for months, so Erwin immediately knew something was wrong.

“Levi?”

Levi’s shoulders twitched and he put the iron down, but he didn’t turn.

Flack

Levi was halfway through his cup of tea when a man - taller than Erwin, how even? - knocked on the back door and let himself in to the tune of Erwin’s mother cooing “Mikey!”

“Dee,” he greeted in return.

“How have you been?” she asked.

“Good, thanks,” he said quietly, smiling at her. His gaze flicked to Levi. “This the short son of a bitch you mentioned on the phone?”

“Oi,” Levi huffed.

Brachiate

There are many questions Levi could ask at this moment--

Are you okay? Do you need help? Who’s going to pay for my window? How did you manage to throw yourself through my kitchen window in the first place?

--but all that comes out of his mouth is:

“The fuck?”

Ignoble

Exude confidence, Levi reminded himself. He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders, sat up a little straighter in his chair. Act like you’re supposed to be here.

Because he certainly didn’t feel like he did. Everyone was walking around like they had been birthed in their Armani suits, five dollar coffee cups in their hands along with the silver spoon.

Levi, on the other hand, couldn’t stand coffee, and, even if he could, certainly wouldn’t pay that much for it. He wasn’t exactly dressed for success, either. Sure, he was in a suit, but it was an ill-fitting one. It belonged to his uncle that he hadn’t seen in years. It smelled like smoke and everything was too big. He had to hike the waistband up to his ribcage in order to get the crotch to fit right, and the arms and legs were so long that he had to fold the extra fabric up and in and pin them in place to get them to stay.

It had him feeling like he was still ten, despite just turning thirty.

Watershed/Transpicuous

“Tell me - what was it like aboard the Rogue?” Erwin asks.

It’s not a loaded question by any means, but Jean can make it one, depending on his answer.

“Armin’s doing fine,” he answers, deciding to risk it.

The air stills immediately. Hange stops flipping through the book in her hand and Levi sits up straighter in his chair. Mike glances to Erwin who nods at him, then he pops his head into the hallway to make sure no one is around before closing the door with a clatter and locking it.

Jean swallows. He is so dead.

Sarcasm

The buzzer for their door goes off and Mikasa jumps.

“Annie, the door.”

“Ignore it,” she says, continuing to lick and bite up the inside of Mikasa’s thigh.

Another, longer buzz sounds, and then Mikasa’s phone starts to ring.

Annie sighs and releases Mikasa’s skin from between her teeth, presses her face into the bed. “Persistent fucking...I swear if it's--”

“Hello, Jean,” Mikasa greets over the phone.

Annie growls and rolls off the bed.

Munificent

It starts small - a kiss to the cheek before he leaves for work, flowers at his desk when he gets there. Before his stomach can even growl for lunch he gets a special carryout delivery from his favorite Turkish restaurant. In the afternoon another bouquet arrives, this time accompanied by a box of chocolates - imported chocolates that Eren knows costs well over three hundred dollars.

When he leaves at the end of the day, instead of taking the subway a car is waiting for him outside to take him home. The ride is longer because of rush hour, but the interior is cool and comfortable in a way that the subway definitely is not, and there’s a bottle of champagne he can sip on as he waits.

Eren knows his face is red, can feel his ears burning - when the car pulls up to their high rise apartment complex and he gets out to follow the path of rose petals on the ground that lead into the foyer and to the elevator, which, instead of its normal smooth jazz jingle, plays the first song they ever danced to as he rides it up.

Retrospective

“This is the faculty art show. Shouldn’t you be out there mingling, Eren?” Levi asked.

Yes, he should be, but how could he when his pants were pitched like a fucking circus tent?

This was his fault, he supposed. He forgot it was opening night or else he wouldn’t have taken Levi’s suggestion that morning to wear a vibrating plug all day.

Eren jolted and gasped as Levi increased the setting.

“Shh,” Levi cooed, “or they’ll hear you.”

Unreconstructed/Occam’s Razor

“...of unreconstructed bias, but if we applied the principles of Occam’s Razor to the platform of business, we could project...Erwin are you listening?”

“Not really,” he admitted.

Hange sighed. “I need you to try and pay attention for me, please. If I’m going to be a TA for Professor Arlert, I need to get this presentation in order.”

“You’re not going to get his attention until he gets an eyeful of his sexy art man,” Mike said.

#tagged #my fic #snk fic #and that one lone #voltron fic #i hope all the links work i didn't do a double check on them

3 notes · View notes

shiroe-is-my-baby · 7 years

Text

Arguments

Summary: First argument with Shiroe

W: Self-insert, slight angst?, fluff near the end, slight nsfw mention?

((Didn’t want to focus too much on the bad, but I did want to make some angsty disagreements. Or in this case just high emotions lol might write a few fics like this for other faves?))

Shiroe and I hardly ever have arguments. Usually, I’m the one who starts them, but only when I’m extremely upset or emotional. He knows how I am and never tries to escalate the situation. We’ve never really but heads before. Ever since we began living with each other, though, there will be days when we don’t want to speak to each other. Those are the days when one of us has had a bad day. We are usually good at reading each other fairly well.

Shiroe hardly ever comes home in a bad mood. When he does, I try to steer clear of him and only talk to him when he approaches me. Although, usually I can get him to sit down and relax, which will unfold into a conversation. Or none at all depending on his mood.

Today was one of those days, only this time neither of us kept quiet.

Shiroe came home a little late today, which I didn’t think anything of. A lot of times he stays later, and it doesn’t worry me too much. But when he comes home and immediately goes into the bedroom, I know he’s in a sour mood. He never stops to talk to me if he’s upset. He usually goes into the bedroom, changes and takes a shower.

I don’t mind this. I know that he needs his space, and I try not to bother him when he gets like this. Although, today I had been missing him a lot. I had my own terrible day, and all I wanted was him. Knowing that he was in a mood, I waited for him to get settled onto the couch before I snuggled close to him.

“Hey love,” I said with a soft smile.

“Hey.”

His words were short, making me sigh internally. This was bad. When he gets like this, I know that I can’t bother him too much. He’s never snapped at me or anything, but I just don’t want to get into an argument with him. I know how he likes to cope with things, but… I really wanted to relax with him. Enjoy the evening that I couldn’t before.

“How was work?” I asked, trying not to sound like I was prying.

“Fine.”

He sighed softly, leaning his shoulder against mine. That was a good sign. He was trying to show affection without actually showing it. That was always a good sign. I smiled a little bit, not pressing into him any further.

However, I did probably talk to him more than I should have. But I’d been home alone all day, wanting his attention but not being able to get it. I was excited to be able to have him home, and I found that I was trying to talk to him more than he would have liked.

“What do you want for dinner, babe?” I asked.

“I don’t know… I’m not really all that hungry.”

“Okay, that’s fine. I’ll just cook something. Or maybe I’ll call something in.”

He nodded along with my words, his eyes fixated on the TV. It wasn’t anything all too interesting, but he always acted like this after a stressful day. Like a zombie. “Do you want some tea?” I asked, “I’m kind of on the mood for some.” Shiroe shook his head, not saying a single word in response.

I chuckled, smiling softly as I stood up from the couch. It did bother me a bit that he wasn’t talking to me, but I had to keep reminding myself that he just wasn’t feeling very well. That still didn’t make me feel any better. I too hadn’t had a very good day, and I really wanted my husband to help me with that.

Sighing deeply, I started the tea and scrounged the fridge for what I could cook for dinner. Shiroe usually doesn’t care what I make, but on occasion he’ll help me pick something. When he’s unsure, I’ll usually call something in or cook something that I like. But because of my own sour mood, I didn’t feel like making anything.

This meant I’d have to order out.

I ran through the lists of take our places in my head, really not wanting anything fast food related. Tapping my foot, I waited for the tea while I contemplated the options. Shiroe needed to at least give me something or he won’t be eating tonight. Which, knowing him, I’ll listen to his whines about being hungry later on.

Smirking at the thought, I peaked my head around the corner and looked at his head from over the couch. “Babe! Do you think that you’d-” Before I could say anything else, I heard a loud sigh and saw him turn his head to look at me sideways.

“Can you just leave me alone, please? I really don’t want to talk! Can’t you just shut up!?”

I blinked, halting my voice and widening my eyes innsurprise. Shiroe has never yelled at me before. It felt weird and a little scary. I swallowed, feeling a lump starting to form in my throat. I was conflicted on whether I wanted to cry or scream back at him.

Which, I ended up doing both.

“I’m just trying to figure something out! You don’t have to yell at me!”

“Well, you see I’m not in a good mood! I just wish you’d leave me alone!”

“Fine! You want me to leave you alone, asshole?! Find yourself something to eat then!”

I stomped off towards the bedroom, watching his eyes follow me. He didn’t say anything as I slammed the door behind me with a loud thud. The action shook the wall, no doubt alerting the neighbors. I honestly didn’t care. My blood was boiling and I was breathing heavy. I had never gotten so angry at him before like that. It felt wrong and gross.

Throwing myself onto the bed, I tried to calm my racing heart. Hearing Shiroe yell at me was something I didn’t like. He’s never raised his voice to me at all. Granted, he didn’t scream. Just yelled a little bit. But that didn’t make it feel any less strange.

I heard him loudly sigh, and then there was silence after that. I wasn’t sure if he was going to chase after me or let us both calm down first. He’s usually good about letting the situation settle before he says anything. I didn’t want to see him right now anyway.

Neither of us really spoke to each other the rest of the night. I stayed in my room and Shiroe did his own thing. I only left the room one time to grab something to eat. When I came out, Shiroe wasn’t in the living room. I only assumed that he was in the office. Which was fine.

I didn’t really care if he ate dinner or not. After he yelled at me, I wasn’t going to show him any attention. There’s food in the pantry and he’s a grown adult. It sounded petty, and probably was, but I was still upset.

Shutting the door behind me, I climbed back into bed and started to eat my leftovers from the night before. It felt strange eating without him. I almost wanted to go find him, but then I stopped myself. I breathed a soft sigh, letting my eyes wander over the TV.

It was just our first argument. Nothing more than that. But I realized how much I hated being mad and upset with him. I never wanted to feel this way again. I’m sure that Shiroe felt the exact same.

It wasn’t until after I ate that I heard shuffling behind my door. There was a gentle knock that made me jump in my seat. I bit my lip, sitting up on the bed and listening for the voice that followed next.

“Hey… can I come in?” Shiroe asked.

“Sure.”

I sat on the edge of the bed, meeting his gaze as he slumped in the door. He shut it softly behind him, looking at me with the eyes that I had seen before. He looked upset with himself and apologetic. I folded my arms over my chest, trying not to look too gentle. I wanted him to think I was still upset for just a little longer.

“I… uh…. here.”

He placed something in my hands, and immediately I started giggling. I tried so hard not to have a reaction, but I thought it was absolutely adorable. He handed me a bowl of my favorite ice cream with chocolate syrup on top to spell out ‘I’m sorry’. It was so cheesy, but I loved it.

Placing my hand over my mouth, I laughed and cut my eyes at him. “You think junk food is the way to make me forgive you?” I asked. Shiroe shrugged his shoulders, rolling his eyes at my comment.

“I didn’t want to just come in and say I’m sorry. I figured you’d want it.”

“I’m just kidding, babe. Thank you.”

He sat down beside me on the bed, not saying anything for a second. He looked down at me, placing his hand on my knee affectionately. “I’m really sorry,” He said, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. I hate seeing you cry, especially if it’s because of me.” He sounded sincere, not able to look at me at first.

Scooting a little closer, I started digging into the ice cream with a small smile. I wasn’t going to let it go to waste. Damn him and knowing my weakness. “It’s okay… I know you were having a bad day. I kinda pushedbyou a little too hard,” I said, softly, scooping a spoonful of ice cream into my mouth.

“It doesn’t matter. You were just trying to talk to me. I shouldn’t take it out on you.”

“Yeah, but I let you take it out on me in other ways. Just don’t yell at me like that again.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

He smiled, lifting my chin a little bit. I felt my cheeks turning red, and I quickly looked away to eat more of the ice cream. Honestly, the ice cream alone would have been enough. But knowing that he did this just to make me feel better was really sweet. Even if it was extremely corny.

Shiroe softly kissed my cheek, wrapping his arm around my waist. Leaning my head on his shoulder, I breathed a soft sigh and took in his scent. This was so much better than being mad at him. It was stupid of me to even try. I didn’t want to have this feeling reoccur, but I knew that it wouldn’t. Shiroe and I were better than that. Our relationship was better than that.

“I love you,” He said.

“I love you too, babe.”

I softly kissed his cheek, feeling his head turn and lips brush against my own in response. I hummed against them, tilting my head and pressing a little harder against him. Just like that, we melted together and kissed softly. After a few more seconds he chuckled and parted from my lips, his hand shifting to run through my hair.

“What’s so funny?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing. You just taste like ice cream.”

I laughed, rolling my eyes at him. He leaned back down for another kiss, this time deepening it just a bit. I parted my lips to taste his tongue, an involuntarily moan escaping my lips. They curled into a smirk, and I slowly pulled away from him once again.

Shiroe raised a curious eyebrow, knowing that my look couldn’t be any good. I trailed up his jawline, moving up to whisper into his ear. I heard him swallow audibly at my seductive tone. That only made my smirk widen.

Even though we had argued, I knew that we would make up. We always did during little disputes, and this time was no different. Although, the way we made up was slightly more… interesting.

#self insert #self insert writing #self ship #my writing #Shirey #fic #fanfic #fluff #slight angst #arguments #I don't like writing arguments

1 note · View note