#what if billy was a real hamster

[minotaurbf]

i had a dream about jerma despite not knowing anything about him and never having seen any of his stuff

#it was weird as hell too #he was an actor and starred in some show where #he had a sister and they had to catch a mouse in some art installation #full of sculptures #the mouse was actually a hamster they just thought it was a mouse #and i also found out his real name was like billy or something. in the dream. what.

[eclecticqueennerd]

Confessions

Part 2

*Everyone in the group now knows your secret*

*Strong language, mild violence, angst*

“What an asshole. I’m sorry y/n, you do not deserve this.”

“It is what it is Frenchie. It’s not like I can go back in time and change what happened.”

“That explains some things now.” MM said as he got up to the fridge to grab a beer. He turns around and offers the two of you a bottle. Frenchie accepts but you decline. At this point, Kimiko is out of her room and was now consoling you, flashing you kind smiles. She begins signing,

“She knew something happened but couldn’t figure out what, just that you seemed… different.” Frenchie translates. Kimiko grins.

“Look y/n, I’ll be real with you. Don’t expect Butcher to keep you around now that he knows you’re a supe.” You nod your head.

“What do you mean he’s in love with her. Have you not seen the way he looks at her?” Frenchie protested towards MM. “and besides, we love you too and Grace kept you around so looks like you’re stuck with us, eh?”

“Wait, what did you say?”

“What? That Butcher can go fuck himself because we love you and you’re not going anywhere?”

“No, the part before that. You said Butcher loves me?”

“Well yeah isn’t it obvious?” Frenchie shrugged nonchalantly while taking a sip of his beer. You wracked your brain to remember all the interactions you had with Butcher, not one of them appeared to scream that he loves you. Sure, he didn’t get on your case as much as the rest of the boys, but you figured it was because you two got along so well. Frenchie could read the puzzled expression on your face, and he continued,

“He’s a lot nicer to you than any of us. You’re able to boss him around and make him do things. He still acts like a child, but he lets you do whatever you want to him, nonetheless. And… he never calls you cunt. You’ve noticed this before, no?”

“I noticed that he treats me differently than the rest of you guys. I just thought that it was because of our shared hatred of supes?”

“Y/n, you’re not an idiot, don’t start acting like one now.” MM spoke up after watching the banter between you and Frenchie.

“That fucked up asshole is in love with you.” MM leaned back in his chair and rested his hands on his stomach. The front door swung open, and everyone’s attention moved to Billy Butcher standing in the doorway. All eyes in the room went back and forth between you and Butcher.

“Righ’, see she told ya.”

“And she’s not leaving! She is our friend.” Frenchie raised his voice while blocking Butchers vision of you.

“Just got a lead on somethin’. Call Hughie and everyone get your bags packed, we’re going to Russia.” Everyone scrambled around the hideout while you stood up slowly from your place and asked quietly,

“Me too?” Butcher shot you a look of disdain while looking at you from head to toe.

“Go get your shit.”

*

“Oh, so you don’t have a problem with becoming a supe willingly, but you hate me if I'm forced to be one? You’re a fucking hypocrite! Then to bring Hughie into it!” You exclaimed. Butcher turned on his heels and spat out venomously,

“The little shit fuckin stole the Temp- V! It will be out of our system in 24 hours, unlike for you where you’re stuck being a supe cu-.”

“Hey look at this!” Frenchie exclaimed. You turned your focus to Frenchie who watching a hamster in a large glass terrarium. It started ricocheting around in the glass cage. Butcher pulled his attention to the metallic tube in the center of the room and pulled off the door. Fog filled the room as everyone was staring attentively at the open cryogenic tube. Out came a naked, bearded man.

Soldier Boy.

Your eyes go to MM, who had a look of absolute terror on his face. You saw that MM’s breathing began to quicken so you slowly approached him and placed a hand softly on his shoulder. His eyes locked onto Soldier Boy, watching him walk around the tube to step in front of Frenchie. Frenchie chuckled nervously, lowering his gun towards the floor. Soldier Boy tensed up and pebbles on the ground bounced as the floor began to shake.

“Frenchie!” Butcher shouted. Kimiko leapt in front of Frenchie as a blinding white light emerged from Soldier Boy. Everyone in the room ducked and once the light was gone, you were quick to examine your surroundings. Everyone was getting up from the blast, but you saw a wall was knocked down and, in the rubble, lay Kimiko.

You and Frenchie rushed over and inspected her injuries. Kimiko was unconscious and a piece of rebar stuck out of her abdomen. Frenchie tried to cradle her head, but you told him not to move her in case there was a fracture in her neck. You took off your shirt and placed pressure on the wound. You heard gravel crunching and looked up. Soldier Boy looked at the three of you on the floor. Your eyes lock with the man and he gave you a steely expression.

*

Hughie had his hand flying out of the van window, high as a kite, in the back seat, the 3 of you were trying to stabilize Kimiko’s wounds while Butcher was driving. MM and Butcher were bickering back and forth about who was at fault for Kimiko getting greatly injured. Butcher was of the impression that it was her fault for jumping in front of Frenchie, whereas MM was of the idea it was Butcher's fault that Soldier Boy was released. Fed up with the events that happened over the past few days, you spoke up and said,

" You know what Butcher? You're a real piece of shit.”

*I know I used contents of season 3 to which I do not claim ownership to them. I used them for the transition to more interactions between Butcher and Reader. Please let me know if you'd like to read more and thanks for stopping by! *

#karl urban #billy butcher #billy butcher x reader #the boys amazon #the boys #soldier boy #soldier boy x reader #angst #season 3 #frenchie #kimiko the boys #mothers milk

[tawneybel]

Note: Ten favorite monsters, part eight. Previous part. The Point is a seriously underrated movie. Catch it if you’re into stuff like The Phantom Tollbooth or Yellow Submarine.

1. Oblina from Aaahh!!! Real Monsters

Tbh, I didn’t really watch this show. Rugrats was and is my fave Nicktoon, so my first exposure to ARM was crossover episode “Ghost Story.” (That, “The Last Babysitter,” and Rugrats in general has great juvenile horror.) But I have a soft spot for female monsters that have “girly” features while still giving grotesque.   

2-4. Anglerfish-esque monsters

Dark spider spirit from Avatar: The Legend of Korra: Some kind of arachnid, anyway. Don’t let her teethies fool you. This lady will just yeet anyone spirited away into the Fog of Lost Souls, she hates people so much.  

Grand Fisher from Bleach: The Bleach Wiki describes him as “resembl[ing] a giant hamster.” Which is great. Didn’t even think of that. Rats aren’t the only rodents that can scary. But he’s included here because I love monsters that mimic victims’ loved ones.

Frogfish from The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie: SpongeBob has other anglers, like two cute ones from “Rock Bottom,” one of my fave episodes. As with Grand Fisher, I love how the Frogfish uses a biological dummy of sorts as a lure. In this case, its tongue. Bringing to mind the Alaskan Bull Worm. 

5. Old Dark Frog from Days with Frog and Toad

This and Bony-Legs were seasonal delights for teeny Tawney. The illustration where he's looming, nay, towering over a chilled Frog was so hair-raising.

6. Brain Eating Meteor from The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy

Pretty much exactly what it sounds like. Has one of the best villain songs ever. Thank you, Voltaire.

7. the Demons of Ignorance from The Phantom Tollbooth

It’s like with the Blue Meanies where I can’t pick just one! There’s the Terrible Trivium, of course. But also the barely-there-but-will-bring-you-fear Threadbare Excuse, draconic Two-Faced Hypocrite, etc. 

8. the Pointed Man from The Point

Trickster who sounds like a shaken clock. Tumblr sexyman candidate right there. 

9. Sadako Yamamura from Ringu

Screenshot’s from Ringu 2. The visage creeping after Mai as she climbs with Yoichi out of the well is based on the forensic reconstruction of Sadako’s corpse.

Localizations are hit or miss for me, but I’ll admit The Ring 2002 was more entertaining. However, I think Sadako’s generally a more interesting villain than Samara.

While Ringu notability took inspiration from Videodrome, it’s its own unique spin combined with Japanese ghost lore.

10. the Tingler from The Tingler

A literal spine-tingler, living on people’s vertebrae. Emits a cardiac, pulsating sound when free roaming and swells after gorging itself on fear. 

Note: Eventually, I will try reading the Ring series. I read more murder mysteries than straight-up horror. Might add other Aaah!!! Real monsters to future lists if I ever watch the show proper. 

#Oblina #dark spider spirit #Grand Fisher #Frogfish #Old Dark Frog #minors do do not interact #horror #monsters #monster #anglerfish #Brain Eating Meteor #Demons of Ignorance #Pointed Man #Sadako Yamamura #Tingler #Aaahh!!! Real Monsters #Avatar: The Legend of Korra #Bleach #SpongeBob SquarePants #Frog and Toad #Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy #Phantom Tollbooth #The Point 1971 #Ringu #The Tingler #Nickelodeon #Cartoon Network #Avatar #Harry Nilsson #The Ring

[thebreakfastgenie]

Tagged by @saltyfilmmajor! Thank you! <3

name: Sarah, I'm trying to make Genie happen on here but I'm not trying very hard pronouns: she/her in real life, online I don't really care but I will not know you mean me if you use anything else so it'll just be confusing for everyone where do you call home?: Boston, Massachusetts but also Maine so just New England favorite animal: manatee and orangutan cereal of choice: usually cinnamon toast crunch but I've had kind of a love affair with Reese's puffs recently. I usually eat a lot of cereal at once and then don't eat it again for like a year. visual, auditory, or kinesthetic learner: I'm what they call a "multi-modal learner" aka a special snowflake. I'm mostly auditory but significantly kinesthetic too, and while the tests always say I'm not visual there are very specific contexts where that's the best way for me. first pet: a hamster named Sunflower Seed (Sunny for short) unless you count fish. favorite scent: you know that smell you get when you put your face right next to the air-conditioner and inhale deeply? ...anyway, lemon. do you believe in astrology: absolutely not. I'm not even consistently able to have fun with it, most of the time it makes me grouchy. how many playlists do you have on your music service of choice: 3 on my main service (songs that I own on Apple Music) and 3 more aborted ones on Spotify (like three songs on each lol and I don't listen to them) which I hardly ever use sharpies or highlighters: highlighters, but depending what it's for, the colored sharpie are great too! song that makes you cry: I don't cry at music but No-One But You by Queen fucks me right up song that makes you happy: All You Wanna Do Is Dance by Billy Joel and finally, do you write/draw/create: yes I do!!! mostly write right now but I used to draw and I miss it

Tagging: @movietonight @orangefarmcat @majorbaby @youngpettyqueen @persianflaw @hamiltonsteele @proceduralbob @koboldkatalyst @old-wild-child @chrispineofficial @rescue-ram @imusthavebecomesomething

[asksoldieron]

SO-4: If I Hafta Have Paper Lace Crammed In My Head Every Time I Read This One Then You Do Too!

If there's a lot of engagement on this, this post is liable to get real long, beware before you expand.

I'll edit in the real art once I make some!

Welcome to the Engagement Lounge, for Meet Billie (SO-4) an instalment! Short comments can go in the replies, but there's a 475 character limit. Longer ones will need a reblog. Remember to @asksoldieron if you're reblogging someone else's reblog, so I can see it too!

Ha-ha, I'm going to make so many number-related typos and formatting errors. "Wait, is this #3 or #4?" It's #4, and Dr. Beetle owes Violet another dollar. Billie's whole name is Wilhelmina Roth, that's a Will Scarlet to keep Rob and John company on their adventures. Sometimes my little puns are so stealthy, I think I'm probably the only one who gets them. (See also "blue headphones with no wires and human teeth.")

So, of course, when I actually got around to writing this, I got "Billy, Don't Be a Hero" stuck in my head, on loop. It was not possible to pick anything else for the musical portion. And once I'd done three songs, I figured I'd probably end up doing all six with music. Hey, I wasn't able to illustrate them when I put them up, and my readers deserve some kinda bonus for their patience. (When I come back from this little break, there's gonna be an artsplosion.)

Billie's not fond of what they're doing either, but she's tougher about it. (I like my men injured and pathetic, and my women strong and competent but conflicted!) Greg doesn't mind as long as nobody hurts any animals. Erik isn't hurt, he's just... being kept in a box with all his needs being met like a hamster. He's fine!

You'll see the beginnings of the Cat Network later, when I have a little space for an important flashback. They did know Greg was willing to do this sort of thing, and, though you haven't seen it yet, Seth and Nicky used him for at least one emergency during the siege. But nobody knew just how much you could do with a silly god and a few friendly animals. People tend not to share information about gods, or write it down. There are often adverse consequences. You'll see some later!

Heehee, Erik tries to speak "Prokovian" (really Russian ala Google Translate, so you can plug it in and decode what they're saying) in this one. "Dobroye outré" is a little too French, but close enough that Mattie probably gets it, if he's listening.

And I had to go back and add the gumballs to this one! I knew they must have something, but when I came up with something that weird (it's for another pun, I just can't help myself!), I knew I had to foreshadow it a little. If they had a gun, maybe you'd just accept it, but gumballs... Anyway, John definitely doesn't want a gun. Nor should he have one. (I want to use them at least one more time, but I don't think I can in the most obvious place...)

[Back to the Site?]

#tin soldier and soldier on #instalment #engagement lounge #look at all the puns you can fit in this serial! *slaps the hood of the serial*

[neonkoii]

+ jane n jonathan borrow wills art supplies by sayin "hey can i use this for a bit ^-^" n then never give it back

+ jonathan n argyle drive down to la one night n stay for a week . joyce files a missin persons report . the two end up gettin arrested for shopliftin n thats how joyce finds out where they r

+ their neighbors dont like them much

+ will spends time at the skatepark . he cant skate . he jus goes there to sketch the other people skatin to practice anatomy

+ jonathan gave up photography after he left hawkins

+ joyce likes to teach jane different things to cook

+ they all share clothes . they dont have enough money to afford a lot more clothes, so they jus share . jonathan n joyce share shirts, jonathan n joyce n jane share skirts, will lets jane borrow some of his shorts, ect ect

+ everyone in the party has an older brother/older brother figure . mike has eddie, lucas has jason, dustin has steve, will + jane have jonathan, n max had billy

+ mike cannot draw for the life of them . he tries todraw a portrait of will n it looks really bad n max makes fun of him n hes all :[ but then will sees it n hes so !!!!!!!!!!!! bc its him !!!! mike tried to draw HIM !!!!!!

+ jane LOVES stuffed animals . she has a collection in like this net hung up in the corner of her room, n her bed is COVERED w stuffies . most of them r from hopper (he had them left after sarah)

+ dustin eats paper . its a horrible habit but he does . sometimes he eats plastic too . the party used to give him their trash after lunch bc he would straight up jus eat it .

+ lucas has an obsession w scented candles

+ lucas jus likes scented things in general . he will only use scented glue stricks but like the shitty kind . it drives max insane .

+ suzie n jane would b besties im not even jokin . suzie would probably b besties w the entire byers-hopper family . autistic to autistic communication

+ lucas n jonathan hold will hold grudges until their death days . lucas still hasnt forgiven mike fully for that one fight in s1 . jonathan has also not fully forgiven steve for 'nancy the slut' + the insults afterwards .

+ holly n erica get along some how ?? they bond over their hatred of their brothers /j

+ eddie doesnt know who jane is but he knows who will is bc mike wont shut the fuck up ab him . eddie looks at him like I Know What You Are

+ the wheelers tan vv easily, as do the hargrove-mayfields .

+ the byers dont tan but they get sunburned !! its really annoyin too bc joyce always forgets sunscreen n ofc the other three dont remember either

+ jason used to host sleepovers for the basketball team every night before a big game

+ mike picks up eddies music taste n it drives his family insane bc ted doesnt like music, karen only like pop, nancy mostly listens to classical music n gets annoyed by rock, n holly thinks its too loud

+ dustin had a hamster named mr figglebottom in the fifth grade . mike accidentally killed it n lucas panicked n flushed it down the toilet . dustin thought mr figglebottom ran away until will accidentally spilled the beans in seventh grade

+ eddie is gay n he is out . like it is public knowledge that this man is gay which is why everyone jus kinda avoids him . mike n dustin n lucas didnt know that before joinin hellfire . i dont think mike or lucas wouldve joined if they knew tbhh

+ mikes fave color is yellow . lucas's is dark blue . dustin didnt know the concept of a favorite color was a real thing

+ steve n mike r strangely besties ?? like steve goes to mike w relationship issues n mikes like "cool ??? i dont care"

+ mike had a small crush on eddie (like a celebrity crush . eddie thought it was cute but obvi didnt feel the same) until he watched eddie shove a tater tot up his nose

+ max doesnt like her hair color but lucas LOVES IT

+ been toyin around w the idea of ftm max ?? but anyway i think at some point max cuts her hair really short

+ joyce cuts all her kids' hair

+ jane was really excited when joyce offered to cut her hair bc !!!! shes part of the family now !!!!!

+ jason was actually really nice before everythin happened w chrissy . he would go out shoppin w lucas n the rest of the basketball team n he would pay for movie tickets + meals n he always made sure to get to know the team

+ mike n chrissy were friends (dustin n chrissy shared a class n had to partner up for somethin, but dustin was busy the only times chrissy was free, so he roped mike into doin the project for him)

+ nancy offers to rent movies from family video for mike jus so she can talk to steve n robin

SORRY THIS IS A LOT . AM CURRENTLY THINKIN OF MORE SO WILL SEND SOME LATER SOON AHSDJFKLDS

THIS this THIS THIS THIS!!!! you are always so real and true and correct but these are THE MOST correct dude

#I HAV A NET OF STUFFIES ABOVE MY DESK IN MY ROOM!!!!!!! i know exactly what u mean #rowe responses #shawn tag #save #fave

[inthiswhisper]

just some thoughts on 15x16....

continuing on this point — this episode felt like a giant metaphor for where dean’s headspace is in terms of billie’s plans for jack. and how young dean and sam are mirrors of older dean and sam, obviously, while travis is a mirror of jack and caitlin is a bit of a mirror of cas.

travis underwent ‘immersion therapy’ in order to face his fears after a hard life, which began after facing a monster sam and dean ‘saved’ him from. nothing helped him cope, so a doctor insisted he return to where he was traumatized and find healing in that. instead, the monster came back and finished the job, killing him.

while sam and dean believed travis when they were younger, dean didn’t believe caitlin, his sister, this time that it was actually the monster and not just travis dying by his own hand—

dean: i know it's hard, okay? but you said it yourself... this ‘immersion therapy’ was making things worse. maybe coming here... sent him over the edge. ... that thing, it's not here.

caitlin: you've changed. back then, you believed him, even before i did.

dean: well, this is different.

sam: dean, we don't know what happened.

dean: ... i know it's hard. but that has to be what happened, because that other thing, i killed it. i'm sorry.

—but when the monster almost forces dean to stab himself in the heart over failing travis—

dean: caitlin, i'm sorry. i just... i didn't want to believe you.

sam: dean thought he killed it. i mean, we all thought he killed it.

dean: yeah, well, i didn't, and now travis is...

sam: ... if we want to stop her for good this time, we need to figure out first what she is. what do we know?

caitlin: ... she plays with people. back then, she could've just grabbed travis, but he said she drew it out. lured him, made a sick, freaky game of it.

dean: she can look like other people, other things. just now, she looked like me when i was a kid.

—dean realizes the monster is real and that she was cunning. she lured travis in and played with him before setting up his demise. this is what reminded me of billie keeping jack on a need-to-know basis regarding her plan. it was a game to lure jack to his demise and fulfill her plan.

i think dean took so long to believe the monster existed while caitlin and sam didn’t because—

cas: well, i have my concerns, but… jack trusts billie, and i trust jack.

sam: but what about cosmic balance, cas? i mean, jack’s gonna kill god? what about amara?

dean: i have seen billie’s library, and i have spent time with her. 'trust’ is a strong word, but… i believe in her. there’s no one more committed to the rules than she is. she’s probably got it all figured out.

sam: like she had the ma’lak box figured out? all i’m saying is i wish we knew more.

—dean also believed in billie while cas and sam were skeptical. and then billie appeared in this episode—

billie: i visited jack in your bunker, gave him his final orders. the last step of his transformation.

dean: filling him up with your cosmic TNT so he can die. how'd you talk the kid into that one?

billie: i told him the truth. jack killed your mother, and all he wants is your forgiveness. and i surmise that the only way he can get that is ending god and freeing you from the... what did you call it? hamster wheel. was i wrong?

—revealing that she did lure jack, by reminding jack of his guilt. that sam and dean wouldn’t forgive him if he didn’t sacrifice himself and free them. and then comes the conflict—

billie: this is on you, dean. ... do we have a problem?

dean: no, i want chuck dead. ... i don't have to like every part of the plan.

billie: and your brother? ... i don't care why you've been hiding this from [him]. but i don't like loose ends, dean. ... i need to know that you've got your house in order.

—that dean is headed down the same path he was with travis. believing he was right, that he killed the monster, only leading to travis / jack’s demise. because, while dean originally thought god / the monster would be dead and jack / travis would live, god / the monster came in a different form — billie — who is after jack, hoping to kill him for her plan to be executed. and dean is willing to believe in the plan, which is why caitlin being disappointed in dean and saying he ‘changed’ must’ve struck me. he wouldn’t just let a monster win and stand by letting it. but because he’s desperate to be free of chuck, to be right, he’s turning his cheek and thinking he, sam, and cas have no choice. but they do, and dean changing his mind after he faced the monster i think might reflect that.

so, i have more thoughts, but i’ll leave it at that.

#this is a thing idk #supernatural #spn liveblog #15x16

[mlobsters]

supernatural s15e2 raising hell (w. brad buckner, eugenie ross-leming)

what's up with that chain, sammy

spn 14x20 moriah giving disney haunted mansion

i'll be honest, i don't really understand this souls from hell / ghosts combo situation. goofy fucking cg on the souls. ghosts of s1 monsters

ah yes, the hell-ghost all hands meeting

is rowena flirting with castiel again? asked the same question in 14x14:

14x14 no clue what the exchange (would say flirting but to what end, to make cas uncomfortable or actual flirting) between rowena and castiel was about.

great. ketch. very tan business casual and with some new wacky weapon. and i guess they're going to have a show-recognized moment of flirting between rowena and ketch.

oook. captions and script say she says "you!" but all i hear is "ew"

CHUCK So, how about the "Game of Thrones" ending? Pretty great, right?

choosing to interpret that as petty chuck shade because what writer thought that was a great ending :p

DEAN This mess... all the messes. It turns out that we're just hamsters running in a wheel our whole lives. What do we have to show for it, huh? Tell me you don't feel conned. God's been lying to you, Cas, forever. You bought into the biggest scam in history. CASTIEL You don't think I'm angry? After what Chuck did? After what he took from me? He killed Jack. But that doesn't mean it was all a lie. DEAN Really? CASTIEL Chuck is all-knowing. He knew the truth, he... he just kept it to himself. DEAN Well, now that his cover's blown, everything that we've done is for what? Nothing? CASTIEL Even if we didn't know that all of the challenges that we face were born of Chuck's machinations, how would we describe it all? We'd call it "life". Because that's precisely what life is. It's an obstacle course, and maybe Chuck designed the obstacles, but we ran our own race. We made our own moves. And mostly, we did well with that. DEAN Did we? I'll tell you what we do know. Nothing about our lives is real. Everything that we've lost, everything that we are is because of Chuck. So maybe you can stick your head back in the sand, maybe you can pretend that we actually had a choice. I can't. CASTIEL Dean. You asked, "What about all of this is real?" We are.

i mean, i can see where dean's coming from. going to start questioning everything you feel even when knowing someone was behind the wheel setting up every important moment in your life. and never knowing if you in fact had any wiggle room to make any decision or feel any feeling that wasn't preordained. think cas is being realistic slash optimistic, but also relatable how dean's feeling. if you can truly blame a singular being for sending you to hell for 40 years, killing almost everyone you care about, torturing everyone you care most about, etc -- all for god's entertainment? gonna be pretty fucking mad

spn 15x02 / nda by billie eilish

so fucking dumb and random but here i am watching and i'm like THAT SCREECHY NOISE! it's so fucking similar to the beginning of the song NDA. that song is the first in my main playlist so i hear the start of it more than normal (because often i'm obsessing over new songs at the end of my playlist so i won't have it on shuffle)

~this is why i can't watch a fucking episode in less than 3 hours sometimes~

just have to laugh every time osric chau pops up. get that bag, friend

DEAN Chuck said he was sending you to Heaven. KEVIN Yeah, what he said, not what he did.

????? okay

cut back to hell-ghost all hands. this plot is LITERALLY making me do this while i watch. didn't i just stick up for you, late seasons? they're not much worse than the other seasons, i said. are you trying to make me look like an ass??

ROWENA The dominating, analytical enforcer... you... and the pulsating, throbbing firebrand... me.

pulsating, ok. little more than i needed to know, rowena

this soul sucking thing with the showdown and the shooting ketch and playing the music like i'm supposed to be sad about ketch getting hurt... woof. and this kevin business is also so random and ridiculous. and i didn't like the amara plotline the first time around

i hope this episode is not an indicator of the season to come.

#supernatural #spnwatch #spn 15x02 #brad buckner #eugenie ross leming #spn clip #spn musical score

[wrecked-fuse]

 Harringrove for BLM piece for @awrble​!

(Angy!)Hamster!Billy!Harringrove!AU, Steve decided to buy a pet. He went to a pet store and found  a hamster with angry issues in "adopt me" cage. He took him and named Billy...

and Bonus -- Billy misses his human bod and tries to gain 6pack after running in hamster wheel but he is too fluffy and can't fight his hamster nature and eats all the almonds even when he starts feel sick lol

#this AU was inspired by ''Hamster'' art IYKWIM #what if billy was a real hamster #like... there's prince-frog but its prince-hamster w angry issues instead #lol #oh god i love this cracky au -- awrble you should draw them too!! #harringrove #harringrove for BLM #aaand.....i def would be angry too if i became a hamster out of the blue #stranger things #stranger things fandom #steve harrington #Billy Hargrove #stfh #wreckedfuse

[cherrydreamer]

Just imagine Billy and Steve sleeping over at Joyce’s after she hosts one of her semi-regular family dinners (where, of course, ‘family’ has nothing to do with blood and everything to do with love). The staying over isn’t the usual thing by any means; the boys have their own apartment now, a decent little place, paid for by Steve with one of the few trust funds that didn’t have too many strings attached, but he’d insisted on adding Billy’s name to all the deeds to make it theirs. Officially. And normally they’d both be scampering back there as soon as it was polite, once dinner was over and the plates were washed and all the pleasantries had been said.

But neither of them fancied the drive back last night. Not that they were really in any fit state anyway, not after Jon broke out some of his good weed and Hop turned a blind eye to the way the beers in the fridge were disappearing at a much faster rate than he was drinking them.

And anyway, staying over means you get to sample the delights of a Joyce Byers Breakfast Special. And while she might not be the best cook, she’s raised two growing boys and catered for a hungry horde of pre-teens after a twelve hour D&D campaign and she’s dealt with a grumpy Hop after a long night shift so. 

The woman makes a damn good breakfast.

“Morning you two,” Joyce greets them with a wave of her spatula, “Eggs and bacon or bacon and eggs?”

They both give a sleepy smile at the joke, taking their place at a table only just vacated by the others, a light coating of grease and crumbs not yet swept away.

Billy takes advantage of Joyce’s turned back to brush his hand over the top of Steve’s, just for a moment, and he can feel his heart aching with love when Steve’s smile grows even bigger at just that gentle, fleeting touch.

Billy pulls away just in time. Joyce turns around and places two heaped plates in front of them. Eggs, bacon, tomatoes, hash browns, the works. There’s more keeping warm in the pan. She knows from experience how much teen boys can put away even without a night of monster slaying behind them.

“You boys want juice?” she calls, two cartons in hand, “We’ve got smooth and...chunky?” she shakes her head and tries again, “Pulpy? The one with the bits, anyway.”

Billy looks up, a rasher of bacon peeking from his lips, and his cheeks bulging like a hamster, so Steve answers for him,

“Smooth please, for both of us.”

Joyce nods, about to pour, but Billy shakes his head and holds up a finger, other hand covering his glass. Joyce waits patiently until he’s swallowed his mouthful for him to answer, "Bits please."

Joyce obliges. Pouring one glass of smooth OJ for Steve, another of chunky, pulpy, bitty juice for Billy.

She’s just finished putting the cartons back in the fridge when there’s a knock at the door, and Joyce excuses herself with a wave. The moment she leaves the room, Steve leans over, eyes narrowed in suspicion and hisses, “What’s that about?” 

Billy immediately tenses at Steve’s expression, but he tries to hide it, grunting around another shovelled mouthful, “Whas’wha’bou’?” 

“That,” Steve points to the glasses of orange juice in front of them, “You like smooth, we always get smooth."

Billy gulps down his mouthful, fork already loaded up for the next one, “You like smooth,” he explains.

Because Steve did. Fussy little shit. He had some kind of aversion to anything chunky. He would only eat the smooth peanut butter, he cringed if he found too many blobs of fruit in his smoothies and god help you if you didn't mash out every lump in the potatoes.

When Billy looks up from his plate, Steve’s just staring, food still untouched in front of him, “But you do the shopping? And you always buy smooth.”

“Yeah...” Billy shrugs, “’cause...you like smooth? So I get smooth.” 

And it’s getting dumb now. The word 'smooth' doesn't even seem like a real one anymore, but Steve’s still staring at him with this dopey expression on his face, and Billy knows he’s missing something but he just isn’t getting it. And that never bodes well for Billy. It’s getting a little harder to swallow now, and he starts pushing the last of his eggs around his plate instead, “‘s just juice.”

“So you just...always buy smooth? Cause I like it best?” Steve’s still looking at him like Billy’s done something wonderful. There’s a grin flickering on his face, one that makes the corners of his eyes crinkles, and he pushes his fingers forward so that they rest on Billy’s.

“Well...yeah.” Billy starts to smile too, letting his fingers link up with Steve’s. He can still hear Joyce chatting away in the hall. He’s fine. They can have this “Smooth’s fine. It tastes the same. I just... like the pulpy one better. But you don’t so...” he trails off, unsure of how else he can explain it. Steve likes smooth juice, they get smooth juice. It never even entered Billy’s head to think about what he’d prefer.

But instead of saying anything, Steve slowly pulls his hand back from Billy’s and wraps it around Billy’s glass instead. He brings it to his lips slowly and takes a sip, and Billy can see how desperately he’s trying to hide the shudder. How his lips purse and his jaw twitches a couple of times before he pushes the glass away with a fingertip.

"I could... get used to it,” Steve says eventually, “It’s not too-” he winces again, and Billy smirks, pushing his glass forward once more, “Really, babe?”

Steve holds his gaze and sets his jaw as he picks up the glass once more. He raises it up and tilts it and the juice is barely touching his lip before he gags, a full body lurch that has him screwing up his face and making some horrid ‘cat-with-a-hairball’ sound right in the back of his throat before he shoves the glass away and shakes his head emphatically,

“No. No. Ugh. But...fuck it, Bill,” he wipes his lips with the back of his hand, scrubbing harder than necessary, “We’re loaded baby. Just buy both.” 

#harringrove #oh so dumb #as per usual with me #i GUESS there might be a little bit of angst #SOMEONE pointed out there could be #but in my head it was #fluff #and totally inspired by my husband #who started drinking 'juicy bits' OJ and Diet Coke #because it was what I liked best and he knew I liked to share #i never got him on to crunchy peanut butter though #cherrywrites #my writing #ficlet

[norahastuff]

Damn that was a good episode. To me it’s felt like there’s been this great sense of dread hanging over this last stretch of episodes, and in an odd way it’s almost a relief to have it brought to the forefront like this.

I think many of us knew that following Billie’s plan was not going to work out. She’s just another cosmic being, a greater power and thus her priorities were always going to lie elsewhere. Chuck’s motivated by the desire for power and by his ego and narcissism. For Billie it’s about rules and order. They see humanity as inconsequential or perhaps in Billie’s case, an afterthought. Hence why following her plan was never going to work. The importance of humanity - the idea that each human matters and is worth something - as well as free will are the two main themes this show is built on. It will take someone who loves humanity and values free will to be able to fix this.

We’ve known that Chuck’s been orchestrating things, but I found it interesting to see how exactly he’d been doing that. This season has put a lot of focus on Dean’s anger. Dean had it drilled into him since he was a child that he was not allowed to be weak, that he had to be the strong one. This resulted in him gravitating towards other unhealthy coping mechanisms in order to survive, and when whiskey and denial weren’t enough, he used anger. He cloaked his fear, sadness and confusion under layers of rage because he didn’t know how else to confront these feelings.

Chuck knows this about Dean, but he also has a very surface level read on Dean and who he really is. Sure he can use Dean’s anger to manipulate him, but that’s not all Dean is. We’ve seen from his tearful prayer to Cas earlier this season:

“I don't know why I get so angry. I just know…I know that it’s- it's just always been there. And when things go bad, it just…it comes out. And I can't -I can't stop it. No matter how - how bad I want to, I just can't stop it.”

Underneath the anger, there’s pain and vulnerability, and when Dean allows himself to feel those things and be honest with himself that’s something Chuck doesn’t really understand, and that’s when Dean becomes unpredictable. Chuck’s relying on the versions of his characters that he created, not really getting that they go deeper than that now.

The ultimate example of this is Cas. Cas seemed to exist around the periphery this week, but honestly that’s exactly what I would have expected in an episode that was about the main characters in Chuck’s book. Cas wasn’t supposed to play a major role in any of this. Sam and Dean were. Amara was. Jack had the biggest role of all, but Cas wasn’t supposed to be in this story, and Chuck once again confirms he was never supposed to be in any of the stories.

Cas defecting was the one wild card that led to all the dominoes falling back in season 4 (ok yes I’m mixing metaphors but you get my point.) That made him an interesting toy for a while. Wind him up and watch him go. I found Chuck repeating Cas’ greatest one liner hilarious. He had such contempt in his voice and I think he was partly annoyed he could never write a line as epic as the one Cas effortlessly came up with. Actually Michael mocked that line last season too, both him and Chuck doing their best impressions of Cat’ gravelly delivery of “I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.”

I have no evidence to support this other than how irritated Chuck seemed by that line and also his famously bad writing skills. I also maintain that Chuck had no part whatsoever in crafting the magnificent “Hey assbutt!”

Cas was definitely not supposed to be in that part of the story.

But Cas no longer interests Chuck. He doesn’t fit into the story he wants to tell and so Chuck believes he has no place in it. And you know what? He’s right. Cas doesn’t fit into this story because he exists outside of it. His choices were his own. That gave him a power that no one else really had, and I think Cas has felt the weight of this for a long time. He knows what it’s like to have no free will, he lived that way for eons, and he also knows what breaking out of that feels like. His unfamiliarity with free will and how to navigate such a complicated concept led to him making choices he’s never been able to forgive himself for. It’s made him feel profound pain, guilt and confusion about his place in the world, if he even has one.

And yet as he’s told us over and over again, he wouldn’t take that back for anything.

“What would you rather have? Peace or freedom?”

We know what Cas would choose. What he continues to choose. He told Dean at the beginning of the season that he knew what was real “we are.” I don’t know if it was wise for Chuck to confirm just how right Cas actually was about that. Cas has spent this whole season thinking he had no role, no importance in the grand plan, but as he now learns, he’s had no place in any of the fights…and yet he’s never let that stop him before.

As a sidenote, I’m not saying much about this because I’m curious about whether the show will address this properly next week but I wonder how this affects Dean’s view of Cas. I don’t think Dean fully believed him earlier this season when Cas reassured him that they were real. As much as he loves and cares for Cas, Dean has always felt insecure about his place in Cas’ life and what he means to him.

So when Dean discovered that he had in fact just been a hamster in wheel being controlled by Chuck, it’s not too much of a surprise that he would start to question his relationship with the angel who literally fell from heaven and into his life. Although I know after their purgatory getaway, they were in a much better place, I think there was still a part of Dean that didn’t fully trust that the feelings were real. There has been so much mess and pain in the past with Cas, how is he to know how much of that was Chuck trying to create drama and how much of it was Cas’ own choices? Well now he knows. It all was. Every time Cas chose him over anything (or anyone) else, it was real.

This episode raised a lot of questions about Cas. Now I just have to try sit patiently and hope next week will answer some of them.

#spn meta #15x17 #castiel #dean winchester #destiel #actually not really but whatever #just in case #my spn thoughts #god has a beard #free will's an illusion #spn s15 spoilers

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

The Rooster Sunrise motel and the roots of the narrative at the sunset of the story. A masterclass in Dean characterization

If I didn’t care / more than words can say / if I didn’t care / would I feel this way? / If this isn’t love / then why do I thrill? / And what makes my head go round...

This song plays as Travis comes in to check at the Rooster Sunrise motel - late in the night, later than the motel technically allows checks in. Metaphorically, this episode happens later than it should. Everything happens later than it should. Dean defeats the monster too late, after it gets Travis dead. They’re running a case when they should actually be preparing for the ultimate showdown against God. Dean tells Sam the truth about Jack too late. The very episode is “out of place” in the season - I mean, purposely so - because it gives us a “old style” hunting case in a season where hunting has lost its original purpose in the narrative but has taken a different purpose, as a sort of caricature of itself, as we’ve discussed about before.

This episode is a last. Okay, we haven’t seen the next few yet, but this episode has a specific function, and it is to be the last traditional hunting case of the show. It’s about the past, and that’s why it can happen now that hunting can no longer exist, not really. This season, we have never had real hunting cases. Fake ones, weird ones, ones that just felt off -- obviously because the story is no longer working the way it did before. Chuck’s “hamster wheel” has been fully revealed, and the narrative can no longer function in the old way.

And this episode happens as... a sunset, actually. Or better, both sunrise and sunset because it shows us, in parallel, the beginning and the end. The first case Dean and Sam work together, and what is essentially the last, at least the last with the traditional formula - a monster of the week, a motel, a gross place, a civilian saved, some choking, some yeeting across a motel room, you know how it goes.

(The elephant in the room is the sun/sunrise imagery across the show, especially relevant after the latest episode brought back the Gas’n’Sip logo, of course, but let’s talk about something else here.)

There are many echoes in the episode. 2x11 Playthings, a case in a hotel that involved children. 11x16 Safe House, where a case was run both in the past, by Bobby and Rufus, and in the present, and involves a monster’s nest and visions. Of course 1x18 Something Wicked, where they defeat a monster that targeted kids after an attempt when they were kids had failed to get rid of the monster for good, and where we also get flashbacks of them as kids. And many other little references and callbacks. A pretty major one (*rubs hands together*) is 10x19 The Werther Project, where something supernatural causes hallucinations that make the victim kill themselves; Dean also almost stabbed himself back then. (Cuthbert Sinclair again... bless.) Oh, well, the pilot itself, where Dean and Sam comment that they make a good team. And then Carver-era secret and lies, of course.

And 14x13 Lebanon. (Yes it gets its own paragraph...) Dean smashing the stone in the ring, making the monster disappear, parallels straight to Sam smashing the pearl, making John disappear. The other monster of the episode is John, of course, who drops the kids in some motel alone while he gets “out of reach” when Dean tries to contact him on the phone (callback to season 1, when they kept trying to call John on the phone and he never answered, not even when Dean was dying or they were in their old house in Lawrence and terrified). John only appears as an invisible figure driving the car, symbolically driving their lives (all this “killing God and getting free” is nothing but a mirror to getting free from John’s influence, right). Callback to 9x07 Bad Boys, where we also see a younger Dean and we also deal with the weight of the lifestyle John placed on him, in an episode that features a literal ghost of a parent. (Heck, we even had Dean stealing food - in 9x07 he was caught by a policeman and brought to the boys’ house, now Caitlin jokes about arresting him.)

As 1x18 Something Wicked, we are presented with how growing up among monsters and hunting cases impacted Dean as a kid. Interestingly, Sam tries to reassure Dean in both episodes, telling him that he was just a kid and he shouldn’t be too hard on himself. In 1x18 he had ruined John’s hunt and put Sam in danger (of course the implication is that John put them in danger by using them as bait and expecting a child - addditionally unaware of what was going on - to watch after a younger child), now that he didn’t tell anyone about the nest because it was too horrifying to share that with other kids (of course, he’d also been a kid and shouldn’t have had to investigate a child-killing monster, so the implication is again that John shouldn’t have left them alone and unable to reach him in case of danger. It’s so telling that the episode has Dean discovering the bodies of dead kids while Sam is playing with another kid - although, of course, the game also turns terrifying soon).

So it’s an episode that has it all: the ghost of John Winchester, the way Dean’s parentified role impacts negatively his relationship with Sam (the episode establishes a connection between Dean shielding Sam from the horror of the monster’s nest and Dean essentially shielding Sam from the horror of the latest Jack news, it’s always about Dean feeling the weight of a responsibility to Sam because he’s Sam’s caretaker, even if he ostensibily mentions Billie’s plan and stuff as the reason of his silence), and of course the theme of FEAR.

I’ve been screaming this from rooftops pretty much since I’ve been here on tumblr - fear is the interpretative key to Dean’s character. Since season 1. Since the beginning. (You’re scared. It’s okay. I understand. See, when I was your age, I saw something real bad happen to my mom, and I was scared, too.) Many posts have been written about how anger is a secondary emotion, when the narrative ostensibly had Dean be “angry”. Dean has dealt with fear almost his entire life, and this episode basically works as an asterisk to the season. Hey, we’re having everyone comment on Dean’s anger! Including Dean himself! He says he doesn’t know why he has these outbursts! Well, we do know. Little reminder here now... he’s scared. And he’s scared because he cares, because he loves so much, and when you keep losing what you love you are scared, scared of losing more and more, stuck in a hamster wheel of losing and losing and losing.

In fact, if losing Jack will stop the hamster wheel, he’s fine with it, because as long as they’re stuck in the wheel they’ll lose Jack again anyway, they keep losing everything over and over, Jack and Cas and everyone. In this episode he mentions funerals of hunters, friends, how they couldn’t even attend all the funerals of people they were close to. There were so many. They’ve always been so surrounded by horror and fear and death. He just wants it to stop. (Of course the plan cannot work, just like the immersion therapy method didn’t work for Travis. Well, poor Travis’ idea of facing his fears to overcome his trauma worked very well on paper, just like Billie’s plan seems to be the best option on paper, but we still have a few episodes still to see...)

This episode is an exploration of the motives of Dean’s behavior, and it spells them out very clearly. John’s abuse and neglect, the forced parentified role he had to take towards Sam since a too-early age, the nightmarish horrors he had to see (while shielding Sam from, which reminds me of the infamous scene about Max’s childhood...), the neverending chain of losses with its baggage of fear.

Dean wants - needs - to defeat Chuck, just like Travis needed to face his fears and overcome his trauma. Because Chuck means hamster wheel. And the hamster wheel isn’t just a theoretical lack-of-free-will thing. It’s not just about a philosophical/theological concept. It’s about the very real cycle of horror and fear and loss that Dean has spent his entire life in. It’s about a pile of dead children, both a metaphor for his brutally ended childhood and a very concrete example of what has been haunting him for so long.

His apparently “okayness” with Billie’s plan is not out of a revenge thing or lack of forgiveness towards Jack (of course we can add millions of words about Dean’s relationship with Death). His okayness with killing Amara is... well, only partly about punishing her for, as he sees it, toying with him. His anger is because he feels so much. If I didn’t care / more than words can say / if I didn’t care / would I feel this way?

#my spn thoughts #spn meta #spn 15x16 #spn spoilers #dean and trauma #dean and john #dean and fear #dean and anger #parallels #spn

[silyabeeodess]

FusionFall Headcanons: Mandy

Despite her own agenda, Mandy has never been one to simply let evil run rampant.  Earth is still her home, and any danger someone like Fuse poses to it is just as much a threat to herself.  With a steely determination matched only by her wit, she’ll make certain that Planet Fusion’s days are numbered.  

Several episodes/movies of GAOBAM like “Billy and Mandy’s Big Boogey Adventure” highlight Mandy’s ultimate goal for world domination and just how dangerously close she can get to it--a trait that carries over in FusionFall through her plans to create an army of her own during Mojo Jojo’s guide missions.  The main reasons she stops other villains rather than helps them is because she wants to be the main one in control with any sort of takeover done on her terms.  Meanwhile, episodes like “Scary Poppins”  would indicate that Mandy already has a large amount of power/influence in at least Endsville, but chooses not to use it as much as she could. Given that there’s little holding her back in this scenario, she might be weighing all of the potential risks such as the large number of heroes that would stand against her and that she personally may lack the strength to maintain her control were she to gain it.  Basically, she’s taking smaller steps that would fly under most people’s notice and bidding her time for the right moment to act.

Nevertheless, as villainous as Mandy can be, she has acted out of seemingly selfless desires before, her friendship with Billy being the most obvious.  True, Billy would make a decent pawn for her, but she’s also had to clean up a lot of his messes and has been shown to genuinely care for his well-being.  It was her plan that saved his pet hamster, Mr. Snuggles, when the two first met Grim.  She gives advice to Jeff the Spider and treats him well.  Even thought she’s not a fan of Christmas and didn’t believe in Santa until she saw him, her first plan was to go after the Head Vampire to save him and the holiday.  She even tried being kind to Mindy when she first moved to Endsville out of sympathy--before ultimately getting annoyed and telling her to shut up.  This fits her status as more of an antihero than true villain.      

Three traits Mandy seems to value most are intelligence, loyalty, and honesty:

She has respect for those who can match her wits even if they’re not always on her side.  We see this a small bit in “The Cracks of Fuse” when, after the player destroys her Hypnotic Charm, she compliments them before warning them that they “won’t be so lucky” in the future.  

She takes betrayal very seriously and it has been shown to hurt her deeply, as it did with Pandora in “Pandora’s Lunch Box.”  Her reactions to it seem to depend on the relationship the traitor has with her and their reasoning beyond the betrayal.  Mandy genuinely saw Pandora as a friend and hated being used, even if the result would’ve been convenient for her, so she had no issue locking Pandora away.  She threatened to destroy Billy in the GAOBAM/KND crossover special when he stood against her.  Meanwhile, the player in “The Cracks of Fuse” has more of a working relationship with Mandy and betrays her by Dexter’s orders in order to save people.  The closer you are to her and the more deep the betrayal, the worse she’ll retaliate.  If you stick by her side, she shows gratitude if only in passing comments.  This would also align with her deep love for her dog, Saliva, an animal known for its loyalty. 

As for honesty, don’t get me wrong, Mandy isn’t above deceiving others to get what she wants.  At the same time though, she often makes her intentions very clear.  If she hates someone, she hates them openly.  She makes her goals and boundaries known to all.  Furthermore, she’ll respect an agreement if she makes one--such as giving the player a reward at the end of “The Cracks of Fuse” despite her anger toward them.  Her hatred toward Mindy may also partially stem from this, given the latter’s behavior as a stereotypical popular girl/bully with a “fake” personality.    

Other than what I’ve said above, this bullet is pretty much based entirely on my own speculations and investment in a certain trope in a lot of current webcomics, so take with it what you will.  Even as an infant, Mandy has been shown to rarely, if ever, smile with a dark outlook on life. She’s also extremely intelligent for her age.  Fitting her personality and the supernatural themes in GAOBAM, I headcanon that Mandy might be an individual who reincarnated with her memories--likely on a subconscious level--from a terrible, previous life rather than moved on to the afterlife.  It’s probably the most extreme claim I could make for her and you all who’ve been following these posts know that I rarely come up with them without some canon basis, but it’s one that I just can’t easily shake the longer the idea sits in my mind.  She’s cynical of the world because she recognizes it as an awful place with awful people--and never would’ve had an infant’s naivety if she somehow already possessed early knowledge about the harsh realities in life.  As a result, she wants to be in a position of power at all times so she doesn’t become anyone’s victim.  She keeps her distance from others, yet cares about loyalty so much, because at some point in that past-life she would have already faced a cruel betrayal. This would feed into an insecurity/unwillingness to form real attachments, along with feelings of superiority.  Even if she would despise personally having an overly nice, happy-go-lucky nature, she doesn’t actively go after individuals who are themselves that way like Jeff: This fits a respect of genuine kindness/innocence while also recognizing it as a potential danger in a cruel world.  She would be more optimistic as a very young child, but with tempered expectations because of being given a second chance at life. However, her worst feelings would still continue to sink in as she grew and recognized everyday annoyances/evils others her age wouldn’t pay much attention to. Billy would only be able to draw so closely to her due to reaching out to her when they were so little and never giving up on that friendship, forcing her to accept him in her life.  Think of a more ambitious Six from Little Nightmares.  

Outside of the Mojo guide missions, most of Mandy’s own depict her as being an extremely effective Fusion Fighter if seemingly a little detached. There’s a strict approach to the way she directs the player, and she doesn’t let distractions or her own desires get in the way of her immediate work.  Due to the amount of knowledge she has on both Fuse and supernatural artifacts for these missions, one of her main roles in the war is likely research.

Her time spent with Grim already allowed her to learn a lot about the supernatural; however, she has also studied under/with Hex some since arriving at Devil’s Bluff.  At first, he admired her ambition and interest in magic. Once he realized how much of a threat and potential rival she could be though, Hex started being more careful with what he told her, treating her with caution.  Mandy is aware of this, and as such will try gathering information he would keep secret from her through other people. As of now, she’s unable to summon magic herself without the help of others or the use of objects despite the vast amount of knowledge she’s gathered.

The mission “Hands Off” hints that Mandy didn’t join the nano project solely to help with the war effort, as she slips up by referring to her allies as “slaves” when explaining the decrease/lack of nanos would make them weak.  Extending this to her nanos themselves, it’s likely she joined the with the intention of using them as a sort of personal army once the war is over.  Since they would think and act like her, she imagined the only thing she’d have to worry about is some of them possibly sharing her ambitions and trying to usurp her, and that she could easily outsmart the small doubles should the need arise.  Others would align with her goals and know they’d be in good standing if they followed her commands.  However, she didn’t count on just how much their IE Donor’s influence would also affect their creation.  Her plans haven’t really changed, but any Mandy nano with a strong bond to their IE Donor is a lost cause to her.    

#fusionfall #headcanons #video games

[bre95611]

HI! I’m finally rewatching 15x17 so I’m doing an in-depth(ish?) super stoned commentary! Hooray!

Before I get into it, I just really have to say, god I love this season so so so much. The writing has just been beautiful, and it has me EMOTIONAL af. Anyway. Here we go!

I always like looking at the Then/Now scenes. I feel they can ring some really important storywide context to the show. A great example of this is the Pizza Man montage. This episode it starts with the conversation from a  few episodes back with Dean and Sam discussing Jack killing God.

I’ve found the Dean/Amara relationship very interesting. After how it was played up in the 15x15 Gimme Shelter, always from Dean’s perspective in a joking manner. I believe it was @verobatto-angelxhunter that discussed the Big Married Energy it gave off, Dean teasing Castiel about a woman from his past. Season 11, as the beginning of the Dabb era, has been calling my name for a rewatch lately, especially with Amara being brought back. Its always been established that the connection Dean and Amara have was not something Dean liked. It wasn’t actual attraction. I’ll talk more about this later.

I have made some random posts here and there talking about the symmetry in endings between Season 11 and Season 15, I will also dig into this more later.

Saw a post about the amount of times “world” is said, want to keep track of that. I know there is a heavy Destiel attachment, and the second time it is said is during the Then sequence, Chuck’s dialogue from the episode with the tvs, talking about how its time to clear the board. (Want to look into Chess mentions this season, maybe even Dabb era as a whole? Because obviously there’s been a game going on at the cosmic level for quite some time). It doesn’t show the scene where Dean and Cas in the kitchen comes up on the tv where Chuck calls them “the world”. but it does have that section of dialogue as t screens are being shown, bringing that to mind.

Then we have Meg 2.0 as The Shadow, Cas is confused why he is being harmed since they’re on the same side. The Shadow makes their loyalty known. Keep this in mind. Will touch on this later as well.

Shit this is a lot for the episode not even starting yet. Below the cut for more!

God Amara is a QUEEN and I love her SO MUCH.

Sam tells Cas to “just get home” cause the Bunker is his FUCKING HOME

One thing I’ve seen brought up a lot is how Dean is always very action focused. Solve the problem at hand, “cross that bridge when we get to it” type of mentality. His plans always revolve around that. Cas and Sam are always very focused on there being another way, how there is always another way, especially when one oftheir lives are at stake. Sam calls him out. Sam wouldn’t care if Dean was saying that all the time if it were actually true, wouldn’t wonder if he ever got tired of saying it if they did only ever have one choice. TFW always subverts the problem at hand. Last season, their only shot of beating Michael was the Malak Box. Season 11 was soul bomb Dean, 13 was Dean saying yes to Michael. Ya’ll see a theme yet? Dean loves to sacrifice himself. Sam’s done the same exact thing, closing the Hell gates, letting out Lucifer. Cas’s whole thing in Season 6? They’ve all done the same things. over and over. Hamster wheel. Think of what made all those endings obsolete? What made them find another way, huh?

Fuck that paragraph went somewhere I wasn’t originally taking it, but still a good take IMHO. 

I’m loving the SUITS!

I really hope that Amara is not gone. I know I’ve seen some stuff that talks about why that has to have been her last episode, but whatever. Imma still dream. And I really might have to just write a fix-it fic after the finale about Aunt Amara and Jack hanging out. 

I just noticed world again (Dean to Amara: saving the whole world’s ass)

“You and I will always help each other.” That look on Dean’s face when she said that. Not  the face of someone enjoying being flirted with by and “ex-flame” or whatever the hell

Saw a post about the generational family story that was being told (I believe it was @occamshipper) that basically has Sam is to Jack as Dean was to Sam growing up (Dean is John and Cas is Mary, super awesome read, will try to find and link in a bit). This whole family arc is about breaking the toxic circle, being a better parent than your parents, found family kinda things. So how has Dean reacted to Sam in these situations? Most recently, I think, is season 8, with the Trials. Sam was sacrificing himself, he knew that, he was okay with it. Sam was suicidal by the end of it, and Dean does what he normally does with Sam and keeps him from finishing the trials, and season 9 starts with Dean completely taking away his autonomy again, allowing Gadreel to possess him. Dean was angry, he was disappointed, he acted like Dean, and that is the kind of treatment he gets from his “big brother” father figure. But Sam breaks through his treatment, tells Jack he is brave and validates him, and doesn’t try and take away his FREE WILL.

Sam continues the path he started on when he told Dean to stop as he continuously made excuses/explained why he had kept things from Sam about Jack. He grows!! I love to see it!! He does NOT give up his FREE WILL. Guys I’m loving it. These boys are actively making HARD decisions and we are seeing growth in real time. TFW in every form has...not really lived up to its name? Sure, the world gets free will, but the boys never do. And not just in situations like they’re told they can’t do something. I’m talking constant violations of each other’s bodily autonomy. Dean all the time with Sam, Cas when he takes down the Hell wall from Sam’s mind, honestly....mostly its Sam having it violated. But the other guys have to stop fucking with it. They all need a variation. Dean needs the Free Will to stop being his father’s soldier, to live his true non performative life. Cas needs to be free of his self doubt. Permission to be happy, not happy in and of itself. Jack needs Free Will to be a fucking toddler.....

Sam SEES it dude, he knows something isn’t right, and he’s the one that figured it out like, every other time this season, too. Jesus. Dean is so desparately caught up in wanting to get the hell OUT of the hamster wheel, he’s too blind to see how deep into it he is. The first plan ANYONE gives him, he goes with it. He’s literally followed Billie’s plan because of one of her books before, and what happened? Cas and Sam brought him back from sacrificing himself. 

I’ve really enjoyed how much Sam and Dean are fighting, honestly. Like, my spec for a while now has been that the brothers are going their seperate ways at the end of all this, the only way to satisfyingly bring an impactful end to their toxic codependency that they’ve been chipping away at for the last few seasons.

Guys I’m suuuuuuuper baked,

Dean says “Someone’s gotta be the grownup here” talking to Sam about taking Jack to do the final ritual. Dean is fully his father, talking to the “older brother” Sam protecting the “special child” Jack. Dean is not  breaking the cycle established by his father, going mad with rage over his circumstances

Jesus Christ the LOOK ON SAM’S FACE when Dean says Jack’s not family. I’m dead. He looks so broken.

That line though is.....hm. All through season 14 and 15, its been established that Jack is family, their kid. When Lily Sunder comes back to help get his soul, Dean makes comments about not making them go through what she did with her daughter, and again to Belphegor in 15 when asked who he was (after a fight between Dean and Cas no less, calls him “our kid”). So this is how far Dean has spiralled? This is how he is choosing to try and deal with knowing Jack will die? Denial of his importance?

“He’s not like you. He’s not like Cas.” Dean feels he holds a different relationship with Cas than he does with Sam. Just...sayin....

Jared’s acting is......truly just phnomenal.

Man, i feel like the music is off? and it makes me think its intentional, cause Becky says something about how there’s no classic rock? So foreshadowing? nah.

This really does feel like....the last real Sam and Cas interaction. It is heart breaking really.

Alright, I’m posting this now......cause I literally just got to the first commercial break.... So 

This is pt 1 I guess.

#spn 15x17 spoilers #spn 15 spoilers #spn spec #spn meta #my meta #my spec

[a-mandala-rose]

You Spin Me Right Round...

I’ve never written a meta post about an episode before, so with only three episodes left, I figured this is the perfect time to start. It typically takes me a few days to process and gather my thoughts, because much like Dean this season, I’m rather slow on the uptake. By the time I have something to say, it usually feels like the moment has passed. But what the hell. We’re three episodes from the end and I have FEELINGS.

To start, I’m going to back up a moment and talk about 15X16 (see “slow on the uptake,” above). Lots of fans, myself included, found themselves frustrated with watching what at first glance seems to be your run of the mill MOTW episode. A *good* MOTW, for sure, but still, with only four episodes left to go, it felt like we should be past this by now. In fact, “aren’t we past this?” seemed to be the theme of the entire episode and that alone should have clued us in that despite appearances, this episode was anything but just another MOTW. If that was too subtle, Billie’s pointed “you’re working a case? Now?” should have been a dead give away that we needed to look deeper. And many tried, but the most a lot of us could come up with was the brothers’ big emotional argument at the end and even that was a giant moment of “been there, done that.” Why at what should be a pivotal point in the series are we rehashing the same arguments we’ve been watching for the past 15 years?

Jumping ahead to 15X17 for a moment, we see Dean absolutely breaking down. He’s losing it. Imploding. Leaving aside all of the problematic comments about and to Jack (we’ll come back to that), Dean lays out the crux of the problem when he and Jack are talking in the Impala: he doesn’t know what’s real. Like he’s been saying all season, he’s lost the perspective to be able to tell what about his life has been his choice and what has been Chuck’s machinations. He’s stuck in Chuck’s hamster wheel. Going ‘round and ‘round. Repeating the same scenes, lines, hunts, and arguments on a loop. Wait…why does that ring a bell?

Back to 15X16 and NOW it makes sense. Why are we stuck in yet another MOTW episode? Why is Dean lying to Sam again? Why is he once again sacrificing someone he loves, leading them “into the meat grinder?” Why is he backsliding on all that great emotional growth we saw last season? Why is he repeating the same destructive patterns that thanks to Kaitlyn, we know he’s been stuck in since childhood? IT’S THE HAMSTER WHEEL. Round and round we go…but whose hamster wheel is it?

Back to 15X17, LOTS going on in this episode and I’m not going to touch on all of it. But some highlights [and these are in no particular order because 1) I’m scatterbrained as hell and 2) the fuck does it matter anyways, because as we’ve established, we’re just going around in a big ass circle here]:

We see some absolutely masterful manipulation by Chuck. Manipulating Dean in order to manipulate Amara because he knows thanks to their “bond,” she’ll never turn on Dean…unless he betrays her first…which brings us to two of the biggest points in this episode. First off, we learn that Chuck didn’t write the Dean/Amara bond, which, as many more brilliant meta minds have pointed out before me, mirrors Dean and Cas’ profound bond, which we learn at the end of the episode was also NOT written by Chuck (and in fact pisses him off quite a bit, to put it mildly.) This reminds us that though he claims to be omniscient, Chuck is definitely NOT omnipotent and while he may be able to control space and time, one thing he can’t control is human emotional bonds and relationships. And this friends, this is important. In fact, it’s everything.

Right before Chuck confesses that Castiel is, as Cas fans have long insisted, the very embodiment of free will (more on that later), Sam references Eileen, which, yes, is very sweet, but also...also, is a call back to their relationship, specifically, to Eileen’s fears that her feelings for Sam weren’t genuine. She wonders what about her and Sam’s relationship was real and what was Chuck, which we knew at the time was a mirror to Dean’s “What about all this is real?” The answer, of course? “We are.” And now we have confirmation: emotional bonds/relationships are REAL. They might be manipulated by Chuck, but they aren’t created by him and clearly, he can’t understand them. That’s illustrated several times in this episode. His reaction to Dean’s “icky” bond with Amara. His inability to "feel the love" of the angels she took him to see. His cold manipulation of his sister. The throwback to the way he threw Adam and Eve, his first human children, out of the Garden and then used their sons to further his own plans. His consternation with Castiel for not doing as he was told after he raised Dean from perdition.

Chuck doesn’t understand and didn’t create emotions. Which seems obvious wen you think about the fact that his first sentient children didn’t have them. Emotions are a specifically HUMAN creation and that is what makes humans so frustrating and incomprehensible to Chuck. It’s why he hates them. Not only are a few of them very disobedient pets, as a whole they've created something he cannot. What a blow to the ego that must be.

The second thing referenced by Amara and Chuck’s conversations about Dean is his betrayal of her. Chuck’s telling Amara that Dean is sending her to the “meat grinder” is not a coincidence. That language is a deliberate mirror to Dean accusing his alternate future self of sending Cas to the meat grinder in The End (That’s only one of several parallels Unity makes with The End. For a much more thorough accounting, check out castielslostwings’ Twitter thread.), which, as I referenced above, also parallels Dean’s willingness to send Jack on a suicide mission. What do these things all have in common? Each time, Dean is ignoring his own instincts, his own “moral compass,” in favor of a plan. In The End, he regrets his choice to say no to Michael…to veer from Michael’s, aka God’s, aka Chuck’s plan and is trying to recreate it by killing Lucifer/Sam. Now he’s following Billie’s plan, even though it clearly feels wrong to him. We can see that in the way he tries to distance himself from Jack. The way he tries to convince himself that Jack isn’t family. That he’s different from Sam and from Cas, even though he’s told Jack before that he IS family. Even though when he was angriest with Jack and distraught with grief over Mary, he still told Belphegor that Jack was “our kid.” We can see it too in the way he reacts equally defensively when Sam brings up how they’re about to betray Amara in 15X15 and again in 15X17 when we can see Dean flinch when she tells him they’ll always help one another. This feels wrong to him, but he’s doing it anyways because he thinks he has no choice.

Looking back over seasons’ past, the two ever-present themes in Supernatural have been free will (obviously) and found family. They’ve always been intertwined. We’ve watched time and time again as Sam, Dean, and Cas choose one another. But now we have those two themes coalescing more than ever before. Every time any of them chooses “the plan” over their family, shit goes sideways. And now we know it’s because, as Chuck has made pretty damn clear in his manipulation of Billie’s plan, he’s omniscient and he controls all time and space.  All plans are HIS plan.

But what doesn’t he control? Emotions. And the bonds they create between people. It’s in choosing one another that Team Free Will has always thwarted Chuck’s plan. Dean refusing to go down the path laid out for him in The End. Cas refusing to "hurt Dean Winchester." Sam refusing to reap MoC Dean. Dean refusing to shoot Jack in that cemetery. The boys refusing to hurt one another, again and again and again. The boys choosing one another again and again and again. And I think that's what Chuck really wants to break. Why he's so obsessed with getting his ending. This is what Becky was getting at in her critique of his story. Chuck doesn't understand his characters, because he doesn’t understand feelings. He hates this creation of humanity that has become more important to them and more defining of them than anything else, including him. So, he wants to conquer it. He wants to manipulate the situation to make his characters choose something of his divining over their emotional bonds to one another. Those bonds he didn't create and that he, in all of his omniscience and power, cannot sever.

15X17 confirms that free will is real. Cas chose to disobey. That wasn’t written by Chuck. And speaking of Cas, let’s look at our biggest two parallels of the season: Dean and Cas. (Sorry Sam. Sit this one out.) Cas, who Chuck has just identified as the epitome of free will. Cas who, once a mindless soldier, abandoned heaven’s plan. Who found his new purpose when he chose to become a father. Who follows his instincts over the plan because “something went wrong” and “the plan changed.” Versus Dean. Dean who has spent this entire season feeling trapped. Who keeps choosing “the plan” over his family and finds his cage getting smaller by the minute.

Back to 15X16. I asked before whose hamster wheel is Dean on? Dean says it’s Chuck’s, but that assumed that free will was a lie. Now we know it’s not. Free will is real and Chuck never even had to take it away from Dean. Dean gave it up as soon as he started following someone else’s plan instead of his own. Dean’s hamster wheel is of his own making.

There are so many more things I could say about 15X17. For starters, those chapter titles…are they referencing Chuck’s story? Or are they chapters in his death book, the one we saw in this episode and Chuck himself referenced? After all, Billie’s read that book, so she must have known “her” plan would fail. But she went down that path anyways…And speaking of Billie, I haven’t even touched on her or the Empty. The Empty says Billie wants “everything back where it belongs” with angels in heaven and demons in hell. Wait. That sounds familiar. Oh yes! My new favorite demon, Zack, said that in our other most recent “just a MOTW” episode. It seems Rowena wants something similar. Isn’t that interesting? And speaking of Rowena, if there’s one thing this show loves, it’s duality. Parallels. They’re everywhere…except, it seems, when it comes to the queen of Hell. Who will mirror Rowena? How interesting that we visited that empty throne room in Heaven last week…

BUT…the main thing here is this: Unity. This episode was about unity and now we have a unified Chuck and Amara. We’re going to need a unified TFW in order to defeat them. Because that is the key to defeating Chuck. Choosing one another…choosing our found family, the ones we’ve created those bonds with…again and again and again.

#supernatural #meta #Mandaladoesmeta #Season 15 #spn 15X16 #spn 15X17

[halo-jpeg]

Was wondering how Billy lenz and leslie (maby brahms? I dont wanna ask for too much u font hav too :) ) would react to an SO thta doenst yell or scream when theyre scared or startled, but instead the squeak like a hamster being stepped on?? Sorry if its a wierd ask i hav a habit of making squeak noises :) please and thank

JSKDMWKIDKWKDLWKFO C U T E YES

Billy Lenz, Leslie Vernon and Brahms Heelshire with an S/O who Squeaks like a Hamster when Scared

Billy Lenz

The first time he heard you squeak like you do is when he first revealed himself. Even before then, he knew he was in love with everything about you. He was confused when you didn’t scream. They always screamed.

The sound would prompt him to shrink into himself, to seem less intimidating. You sound like the hamster he had as a very, very young child. He had only one memory of the rodent- the time it had bit him. 

Billy would mimic the sound, giggling to himself at the spot-on impression. You’d think he was mocking you, but after a few more squeaks you would understand that he was simply amused, and that he didn’t seem to want to hurt you. 

He loves the little sound, so he’ll try to scare you whenever he has the chance, giggling like a schoolgirl whenever he is successful, and bombarding you in hugs and kisses to make up for the spook. 

After a while, he would start squeaking, too, when he gets scared. He’s a pretty jump guy, so it happens quite often. The other voices in his head makes fun of him, but for once, it doesn’t bother him. This is the one and only thing he loves about himself no matter what, because it originated from you.

Leslie Vernon

Your first encounter was when you were his chosen Final Girl- he hadn’t yet set his plan in action, but he’d slipped up when attempting to spook you and you’d run right into him. He hadn’t been expecting you, so his shout is what actually scared you. 

He’d go silent for a moment at the little sound, and then he’d smile and try not to laugh, apologizing for scaring you and introducing himself. This only made him fall more in love with you- it was even to the point where he didn’t feel like he could go forward with torturing you and your friends. 

He makes sure you’re never self-conscious about the adorable sound, making sure you know how adorable he thinks it is. He admires that you’re different from other people.

No matter how hard he tries, any attempt to scare you never results in a scream. He swears up and down that he’ll scare you so badly you actually scream; it’s his life goal. 

Every time he hears the sound he feels the obligation to chuckle since it’s so goddamn adorable. 

Brahms Heelshire

You had only left the Brahms doll for a split second, leaving the room and returning, and you had been more than startled when it wasn’t in the place you had left it. The sound you made almost made Brahms giggle, and that would have revealed his hiding spot inside a closet, slipping back into the walls. 

He’d move the Brahms doll regularily, every time earning that squeak- when you finally get used to the moving doll and stop being afraid, he gets a little annoyed and decides it’s time to show himself. He can do much better when he isn’t needing to slink around. 

The real Brahms makes you squeak in fear as well, until you hear his child's voice and put the pieces together. Acceptance comes soon after that, but you always pout at him when he spooks you. 

For someone who thinks it’s okay to constantly scare you, he gets rather annoyed when you scare him and get his panicked, high-pitched little girl screech in return. 

He doesn’t want other people to hear your squeak, it’s too cute for them- as a result, he’s always calling you throughout the day to make sure you’re staying alert! You can’t get scared, only he can scare you!

#billy lenz #billy lenz headcanons #black christmas headcanons #black christmas #behind the mask: the rise of leslie vernon #leslie vernon #leslie vernon headcanons #behind the mask: the rise of leslie vernon headcanons #brahms heelshire headcanons #brahms heelshire #the boy #the boy headcanons