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darkpoisonouslove · 3 years

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Winx Club Season 8 Thoughts Part 1

Here I am! The latest season of Winx. Can’t believe I made it here (especially after I sped through seasons 6 and 7). I am kinda excited about this because I am finally getting to watch the second part (I have seen the first one) and I think that after season 7, it really can’t get that much worse. Also, I am now used to the idea of the art style even if I still despise it completely and passionately. So let’s do this!

8x01:

- Who thought this art style was a good idea? And why did they have to bring the band back? That was so unnecessary. But at least the song in the opening isn’t bad.

- So... Bloom is the main vocalist but they just leave Musa to write all the songs? Didn’t think that could get more unfair and yet it did. Also, love how they changed the art style but Stella is still acting as immature as she has since season 4.

- Kiko is actually being acknowledged in the second minute? Please, tell me that will last after the lumens.

- Oh, wow, the plot is already starting? I am actually pleasantly surprised. Took them only two minutes.

- Ugh, not Obscurum! Pleaaaaaase!

- Lumenia is the star that lights Solaria? Does that mean it is the first sun of Solaria? Okay... That’s actually kinda cool.

- Oh, great! The one with all the info has amnesia! But actually, that might be a good idea because not everything is convenient for damn once! Edit: And Timmy and Tecna are back to being inventors! *happy sob*

- How is a scare supposed to trigger memories? By inducing a flashback of traumatic events? That’s cool but fear can also cause memory blockages. So idk about that. Lmao @ Kiko with that hammer, though. You might have the right idea, Kiko. We’ll come back to you once Twinkly gets annoying.

- The dissonance between the maturity of the Specialists’ voices and their FUCKING FACES! It is unbearable!

- Oh, Kiko is hitting on Twinkly? XD Jk. He just wants to cheer her up and it’s actually really cute. Almost makes up for them totally ruining his design.

- Not a song number! I am forewarning everyone that I will be skipping all of those.

- Omg! A scene of the Specialists talking? About their own stuff?!??! And them messing around with each other (read: mocking each other (and especially Nex)). We haven’t had that since... season 4? It was sorely missed, THANK YOU!

- Riven is back!

- And Knut is back! But wtf is up with Griselda’s voice? Also, how did they change her design the least, yet still totally ruined it? I cannot comprehend that! Lmao at her gestures at Knut, though!

- The memories of Twinkly actually looked pretty scary and traumatic. I can’t believe I am saying this but this season is doing a decent job so far and even more than that.

- Dammit, why do I have to suffer Butterflix again?

- I was gonna say that that was quick but the thing actually reappeared. That’s... pretty nice. Could be used to such a great advantage! And it was actually Stella’s spell that worked and not Bloom’s? They gave up on their obsession with Bloom to make this make sense? Um, yes, please?

- Okay, stealing starlight sounds like a rocking plan as soon as they explain well why the hell that is the goal here.

- Yeah, Stella, you are so damn cautious! Girl, you’re almost as impulsive as Bloom. (But XD @ “Caution is our middle name... More of a nickname, really”)

8x02:

- Twinkly: Where am I? Me: At Alfea. Shut up!

- Why does this show have such an aversion to letting Kiko sleep in peace, dammit?!

- Flora has a plant that takes care of other plants? Omg, that is so cool! And we’re finally seeing her care for the plants in her room again! This season is already better than seasons 6 and 7 combined.

- Stella could just use magic to shrink down that enormous suitcase.

- Omg, they’re spending time with their boyfriends again instead of just screeching at them for no reason whatsoever? Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Why are Winx mad that the Specialists didn’t tell them about Riven? What would it have changed? They still would have been shocked. And why the hell is Musa yelling at Riven? They broke up! He doesn’t owe her a schedule of his every waking moment! I hate this reaction.

- Why... are the outfits gonna let them travel in space? I mean, can you imagine how cool they could have looked in spacesuits?

- Wow, that’s a lot of pink. But that IS the Winx aesthetic to differer from the aesthetic shown in you-know-what.

- Why is the queen ruler of all the stars and not just of Lumenia? Otherwise, the star lore is pretty cool. I have to say that the whole thing with the rivers reminds of the Underworld a lot which is an interesting parallel to dwell on.

- Stella is pretty amazing in this already indeed!

- Oh, the crystal monsters. I remember those. They were really annoying. And I am not a fan of the upcoming transformation upgrade.

- Did the Specialists follow them there? Not the most unshady thing they’ve done but at least they’re helping. Also, I would like to point Netflix’ attention to the way their weapons look! Take a close look!

- OH MY GOD! Someone had a smart idea here! They are actually handling themselves even though their powers aren’t all that effective! Riven is saving Musa and being awesome! This is good enough to make me cry, wtf?

- Ooh, damn! Love the way Valtor’s mark showed up and how actually bothered by it they acted! That was cool and really created a good atmosphere!

- They saved the river AND they actually talked about the sneaking around in a (mostly) mature manner? And they resolved the conflict? RIVEN IS COMMUNICATING?????? This season is a fucking treat so far! Except for Musa being a goddamn primadonna!

- Valtor’s new design is also pretty close to his original one and yet... just NOT. IT!

- Cosmix time. Okay, the visuals are actually quite pretty (I especially love the fact that they look transparent at first; I have a feeling there’s a nice symbolism to this but I’ll have to think about it a bit more). The song isn’t bad either but it’s a little repetitive,

- They probably could have done better with the name than “star yummies” but it isn’t quite so bad. I mean, we’ve seen worse and this is pretty minor considering that they’re doing pretty well with almost everything else (so far and I hope I am not jinxing this).

8x03:

- Okay, the name sounds dumb but it’s accurate.

- I have to say that I saw the twist with Obscurum coming even if I was only clicking through the episodes when I first watched this but now I want to see if it was foreshadowed. Him saying he wants to rule Lumenia still isn’t enough foreshadowing but it does raise the question of why Lumenia specifically so it’s headed in the right direction at least.

- Nice move, Stella! And, omg, did Flora just use something that’s not vines? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am getting really hyped up over here.

- They’re thinking! They’re actually instantly adapting to the problems that they are facing! Man, this is even better than season 1! HOW? Not that I care. Just don’t let it stop!

- So Valtor is actually using starlight to buff himself on a magical level? And in season 1 they said that starlight was the purest source of magic (4kids). Is this... continuity between the first and the latest season??????? I am literally tearing up over here because I never believed this moment would come but it has and it is beautiful!

- Not a fan of the Valtor and Obscurum dynamic because it is just... a big no again, just like his working relationship with the Trix (except I can’t decide if this is worse because Obscurum is afraid or if s3 was worse because Valtor was leading the Trix on about *gags* you know (don’t make me say it)). Love the castle in the stars, though! So cool (even if it is also so very impractical).

- Man, Twinkly really is just a stand-in for the pixies, isn’t she? Same bravery and complete and utter uselessness balance.

- Stella is fucking shining and I am loving it! But did Obscurum just say “erase them”? You mean... this has actual stakes? And Bloom’s projection of the Dragon Fire makes sense because Cosmix is light-based? Musa is using an attack that basically acts like an earthquake except without the damage aka... safe for usage? I am going to pass out from happiness. Like, you don’t even know.

- THEY ACTUALLY LOST?????? And they are not giving up but... coming up with a plan???? That is smart??????????????????? I am in love with this season for now.

- They powered the core! And that will now cause Valtor to make a shift in his strategy! This season is actually dynamic! Goddamit, yes!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!

- Obscurum to Valtor: “Something more intimate? You, me...” ... Why is he hitting on him? Bleh. But damn! The trap dimension has so much potential!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Oh, song time. Goodie. Why is Obscurum acting like he has the dancing plague? And, for fuck’s sake, why am I getting Christian Grey vibes from Valtor? Ugh! *shudders* Please, no! But he is actually taking Winx seriously and coming up with countermeasures? Um, yes, I will take that!

- Ugh, why are they having classes again?! I hate that part!

- Sky, you know where they were! But I actually kinda like the change to have Bloom be the one that doesn’t have time for dating instead of having her sulking over Sky being a prince and having royal duties the whole time.

- What do you mean that Griselda doesn’t know what is going on? This is not Griselda!

- Tecna, watch what you’re putting in your damn potion! I know Musa fucked up but you could have checked what she handed you!

- Aww, Tecna throwing a dance party to cheer Musa up was so cute! And look at Stella dragging all that luggage up the stairs on her own! She is precious (and devoted to fashion but this time in a not so annoying manner... so far.)

8x04:

- Dammit, why is Obscurum the first thing I see?

- Okay, it’s pretty cute how excited Bloom is. And all the rest of Winx helping Sky while at the same time judging him for not being better for Bloom and putting more effort in it. This is just the dynamic! I love it!

- Musical food? What the hell, Musa?! But lmao at the Sky and Flora moment there. And Musa and Layla’s reaction to his words. But he was right. Flora was the only one being useful.

- What picnic under the stars? There are no stars! It’s the middle of the day!

- Oh, why the drama now? Bloom also forgot their date in the previous episode because of her mission. Sky is doing the exact same rn! Hypocrisy much?

- “Your Great Malevolence” and “Your Vileness”? I don’t like Obscurum but his decorum is amusing at the very least.

- But if a star has to be attacked before it will alert them that they need to go there, they won’t be one step ahead of Valtor. They might be able to catch up with him but they are still one step behind him.

- A moving star. That was actually a cool idea although I am not sure how the hell that is supposed to work.

- Why have those lumens never heard of music? But damn, I am actually happy that they made the band plot relevant (for all of 3 seconds). At least make it have some purpose.

- At least Bloom actually also supported Sky while attacking him. She is literally the definition of mixed signals here but that’s better than her just being plain mad.

- Can they use the music to capture the star yummies in a trance? That would be nice and it would justify having the band in this season.

- Stella is having the time for a selfie while actually being super effective and handling that part of the mess on her own? Yes, please! Where was that in the previous seasons?!

- The thief is not “trying” to attack. He is attacking! But damn, Brandon made some good moves there! Are you telling me that we actually get to see the Specialists doing their own missions again plus a really cute parallel between Brandon and Stella? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love it!

- They’re being pulled in a black hole? Holy shit! This season is actually getting intense! And it makes sense? I am shooketh! Can Stella save them with her light, though?

- Oh, nvm! They’re gonna do it together. Eh, that still works I guess.

- The Specialists were really working as a team here and I have missed seeing that so much! It’s great to have the show acknowledge them again. It could have only been better if they didn’t look like first graders.

8x05:

- Oh, now the whole starship is being pulled into the black hole? That is actually cool! They are maintaining the tension for more than three seconds and they are showing how things actually function? Well, there’s a big surprise.

- I am glad that they are actually solving this but why couldn’t Stella generate stardust herself? She is the fairy of the sun, the moon and the stars. It would have been really interesting to see her do that and this season’s theme is right up her alley.

- Valtor’s failure is kinda amusing. But I feel a little bad about Obscurum because he literally has to walk on eggshells around Valtor. No one should have to be put through anxiety like that.

- Ooh, zero gravity plus invisibility device? That is so cool!

- I wish Bloom and Sky would have talked about their little drama with the surprise, especially because there was no need for it since the delay actually helped make things even better and much more romantic. And I am also not all that sold on the Beauty and the Beast vibes I am getting from this.

- Why is Musa acting like that again? Riven is trying to be supportive and take interest in her music. I know that he ran away but obviously something happened.

- Good thing that Riven is being competent while the rest are busy partying. He did pretty well considering that he just intercepted a planned heist and he wasn’t prepared.

- Aren’t you supposed to drift in space instead of fall as if there’s gravity?

- I am a little done with the ship being threatened yet again because it can’t move without the stupid core but I really want to see how Winx are gonna save it now that the ruby is stolen.

- Maybe if they try something else other than generic blasts they may be able to defeat it.

- Valtor was the one that summoned the black hole? And he is getting low on magic juice? That kinda makes sense now that he doesn’t have Dragon Fire anymore.

- O-kay. That strategy was semi logical. Not the best they have done but it could have been worse.

- Selfish? He is trying to save a whole planet! It wasn’t like he was stealing it for the money! No, I get it that his actions weren’t okay but Musa is being a bitch to everyone. And what she just said to Riven. She is refusing to give him a second chance but is acting like she’s the one who is making all the compromises here!

8x06:

- Why wouldn’t he be allowed on Eridia? Oh, he really fucked up the core.

- Oh, shut the fuck up, Orion! It is your fault it didn’t work because you were the one who broke the core and now it can’t hold the light!

- Flora is really rooting (whoops) for abandoning the core. Nice one! How the fuck does she think to save the plants without fucking light?!?!?!?!

- Can I throw Orion in the black hole? HE is the one who fucked the whole thing up because he didn’t know what he was doing and now he is yelling at them that they don’t have a plan! Even though they agreed to help him instead of throwing him in jail!

- At least Valtor is adapting to the situation on the go and coming up with new strategies. But Orion is such a fool. He is desperate but why didn’t he consider the question of why the hell Valtor would care? Obviously he has beef with Winx which puts him at the not-so-trustworthy column.

- Man, Riven is right. Orion is a damn actor and very good at playing them. That isn’t his problem, of course, but the Winx’. I just wish Musa would think instead of pout the whole time.

- Shut up about the goddamn plants, Flora! You can’t save them in any longterm way without fixing the core of the planet first!

- DO NOT make “starsome” a thing. It sounds ridiculous. It doesn’t even make sense!

- Riven is actually discussing how he feels with the other Specialists? And they’re having fun (even if it is at his expense)? Why does Musa refuse to see how much he’s changed? I hate the way they are just trying to make more stupid drama!

- You do not look like big lumens to me but okay. Twinkly has a serious crush on her friend, doesn’t she?

- Yes, we all know that Tecna is a genius. And that is why she doesn’t become pray to stupid love drama when there is no reason for any!

- How the hell was Stella supposed to know if it will actually be safer? She said it looked safer! There is a difference! Also, they are only now wondering why Orion left them on their own!

- Now you guys are screwed! But wtf, why did Tecna just covere her eyes instead of... trying to do something like the rational person that she actually is! And you have to love how they only had Flora and Stella arguing so that they will have to come together to save the rest giving the illusion that they are actually undergoing some development. But hey! An episode without a musical number!

8x07:

- What is this now? Are they trying to make us sympathize with Orion by showing some remorse on his part? It is not working!

- They made Obscurum a cheerleader? He seems to be suffering from Stockholm Syndrome, though he is not exactly a prisoner or hostage of Valtor’s. But still. There is some kind of similar vibes.

- Cool! They revealed that the star yummies are actually corrupted lumens. That was a pretty clever idea, not gonna lie. And it is totally on brand for Valtor which is also great.

- Well, I don’t see you, lumens, fixing the fucking core yourselves so you might wanna start appreciating the fact that they’re trying! They didn’t know the core was broken and wouldn’t hold the Cosmix light!

- And how do you plan on saving them, Orion? You have no idea what you’re up against and you just betrayed the only people that cared about helping you!

- Why is Twinkly not being corrupted like all the other lumens? They are different in some way that was never explained but it was already implied that the corruption works on ALL of the lumens! So what gives? Except obvious plot convenience, of course.

- So Flora actually tried something else and didn’t go for the vines at all? I am shocked... but appreciative!

- Why aren’t the plants answering? Are they too dead for words? But that spell was actually pretty cool! They made a little sun that also has nature powers added to it to shine on all of the plants at once! That was so clever and actually pretty creative! I love it!

- The nature defeating technology theme is a little misplaced I would say considering the way they fix the problem with the broken cores of the stars later on.

- Wait! Winx were transformed when the robot caught them. Why did they have to transform again and when did the transformations disappear?

- They didn’t actually fight the thing! So far their powers have been used very little for actual battle and a lot more in creative ways to restore the balance of the stars. That actually makes a lot of sense since that was what the Cosmix was for! I like it!

- Did they just make a magical sun out of Stella’s powers by boosting her energy? This was awesome!

- Why did they think Orion was the one that changed the lumens? They know that Valtor is the one working with Obscurum and commanding them! That was such a stupid guess and for what? To give Obscurum some kind of “witty” line for his entrance?

- Orion does have cool inventions but for being a genius creator he is being a fucking dumbass! Oh, now you want to be “united” with them. After you almost got them killed and your planet fucked over big time.

- Musa is gonna give Orion a third chance but she’s gonna keep being a bitch to Riven, huh?

- Wizgiz’ redesign is giving me nightmares. Why is he teaching them something that they have been doing literally since season 2 and just did not three minutes ago?!?!?!?! And why are Knut and Kiko painting the yard pink? Really? Just so that Winx can show what they have learned even though they’ve known it for about seven years now?!?!?!?!

- Submarine star? That sounds rocking. But wait, they are using Sirenix in the next ep? Why don’t I remember that? I have watched this... I think. Yes, I have. I remember the stupidity and Nex and Layla having a moment. So why don’t I remember Sirenix?

8x08:

- I thought Valtor was on the scene and then it turned out he was just in an illusion. *sigh* And why can’t he just go himself? He is not doing anything this season. Just sitting on his ass and bossing Obscurum around. It’s just... not Valtor at all. And what’s this obsession with fucking up Andros every goddamn time he shows up?

- Aww, Winx are being so adorable and supportive! Nex, too, though that is OOC. But I can’t understand why Layla didn’t just pick up the phone and tell Nex that she needs him to stop calling so that she can focus. What is so hard about that?

- I like this version of Stella’s fashion obsession. It feels a lot more natural and isn’t overtaking the whole group and the show.

- Well, they didn’t ruin Theredor and Niobe’s designs! That’s something. And Ligea looks pretty much the same as well. I don’t understand why they felt the need to fuck up Winx and the Specialists’ designs but okay.

- Why are they making Layla unable to remember three sentences? She can do much more than that and she has always been the most capable one of Winx and an exemplary princess.

- Oh, so they already mentioned that the queen’s brother disappeared exactly when Valtor showed up (How tf does she even know that? The flashback that was shown later plus the fact that no one seemed to know Valtor was back before Winx saw his mark in 8x02 contradict that.). That and Obscurum saying he wants to rule Lumenia plus Valtor’s obvious knack for corrupting and changing everyone that’s working for him, spill it all out.

- Pretty sure no one at that party cares about Twinkly but whatevs. As long as she isn’t on screen to be annoying.

- Nex transformation time!

- Sirenix is back (never has that ever happened before) and I hate the redesign even more than the original. Didn’t think it was possible. They have also fucked up the transformation sequence and made it more boring. Nice move!

- Why is Layla refusing to talk? Coming forth about her feelings is gonna make it better. I like that Nex is actually being sensitive here even if he never naturally changed to become like that and they are just writing him wildly OOC. But he was so much of an asshole that I prefer this tbh.

- How the fuck do Sirenix powers have no effect on “a creature of darkness”? They went on the Sirenix Quest to defeat Tritanus who was definitely a creature of darkness! The writers don’t even know what they’re saying anymore. At least they left Winx handling the shark even if their powers aren’t working on it. If they’d sent Nex after it and Winx after Obscurum, it would have been too convenient.

- I like the fact that they managed when their magic was useless against the enemy. At least the writers are being a little more creative in the battles by making them rely more on strategy rather than on their powers. I can accept generic blasts and beams if the idea is that that makes their magic so useless that they need to find a creative solution.

- Nex is rooting for teamwork? He really has changed. I just wish they would have shown that instead of just jumping the gun like that.

8x09:

- Why didn’t they try trapping the star yummies in a morphix net? Or something that Tecna made with her magic? Or figured out a way to close the portals that let the star yummies come and go?

- They’re gonna make THAT a problem? Breathing underwater without Sirenix? Not like Layla has been able to breathe underwater continuously throughout seasons 2-5 without the need for Sirenix. AND she also taught the others how to perform the spell. This is such a non-problem.

- They also changed the Sirenix spells, didn’t they?

- They have been in tougher predicaments. I hate how they keep making Layla despair without a reason because she has always had a damn fighting spirit.

- Oh, look! It’s the anemone stupidity. And how is Stella supposed to wake up when she is under the influence of the anemone sting? You could try a spell if you want to wake her up, Flora!

- You’d think the lumens of Andros would know their fucking princess!!!!!

- What was the big idea with rushing out of the cave if Layla didn’t have a plan? Also, she was the one that figured out the anemones attacked when they were provoked, yet she kept attacking. Stop fucking attacking them! It’s only making things worse! Jeez, it’s not so hard to figure out that you shouldn’t antagonize them.

- So the Andros lumens sing but the Peripla ones have never heard of the existence of music? Pretty damn solid. Also, they just sang the same melody the whole time even after Layla asked them for something extra beautiful.

- How the hell did she fill the morphix with air? Did she pull all the water out in the morphix shielding and only left the oxygen atoms inside to make up oxygen molecules? This somehow doesn’t seem normal but anyway.

- So what unspelled the shark? The light of Gorgol? The living star? The starfish star? They are really starting to fuck up this season.

- Love how they never said how many years old Andros is becoming!

- Why did they make the trap dimension look like a pinball machine? What was up with that? And why did Gravity Falls do it so much better?

8x10:

- So now Alfea is having an anniversary as well? And why the fuck is Twinkly only asking now about the meaning of anniversary when they already were at the anniversary party on Andros? And they really made “starsome” a recurring slang? I hate it.

- Why is Faragonda letting the students organize the anniversary? Also, not a fan of how these latest seasons are making Griselda and Faragonda look not so fond of each other. They definitely felt a lot more in sync in the first seasons.

- Lmao, love how Winx are roasting themselves. But I cannot believe that no one has said anything about Helia’s ugliest haircut... yet. They couldn’t have possibly fucked it up more after the season 4 disaster and they somehow did! Fucking spectacular! And why is Riven wearing a scarf? When the fuck have you seen Riven with a scarf? This is ridiculous!

- Love the way Flora and Helia just decided that they will be matchmakers now! But I do think that they should first try figuring out why Musa can’t forgive Riven before deciding she will trust him.

- Why didn’t Twinkly just sit on Riven’s shoulder instead of plopping herself down right on top of the controls? The zero gravity dancing was actually pretty cute but Musa could have tried just dancing with Riven. Or at least they could have said something about why she feels like she can’t even dance with him (because she feels him unfamiliar anymore or something).

- Hypsos looks so very familiar but I can’t place it. Reminds a little of Amentia’s kingdom tbh.

- I cannot believe that the Twinkly and Lumila storyline will actually have a bearing on the real plot. How did they manage? Though, I suppose I should be happy about that.

- Turning a constellation into an actual monster was a damn good idea! Although, the writers sort of implied that Valtor has the power level of a god which has not been supported by the narrative. He was such a stronger villain in season 3.

- So... what did they do? Did they send the Hydra through the portal that the star yummies use? I actually remember it being a bigger threat and harder to defeat. Is this really the end?

- Oh, look! They can reverse the star yummy corruption with the power of love! Cut to the wedding (of Twinkly and Lumila).

- I said wedding, not a fucking concert!

- Musa, I don’t even know you anymore! Since when doesn’t she want to be the center of attention! She was literally mad at him because he hadn’t called aka paid her attention! Besides, she’s a singer (which you couldn’t fucking guess from the fact that Bloom is the goddamn vocalist!). What do you mean that he exposed her? Those are just some outlined images projected! She is a lot more exposed when she sings on stage! This is so goddamn stupid! Season 2 Musa would never.

- And why are they making Flora and Helia fuck up their own sync over Musa and Riven? They should just not meddle and keep their own relationship in harmony!

8x11:

- I am so glad we’re getting rid of Obscurum soon. I have had it with him! “Go undercover as one of [Winx]”? What the actual fuck?!

- Why is the trap dimension a goddamn gaming universe? They are truly wasting its potential! And why not just shove Winx in there?!

- Flora and Helia have never had a disagreement before? Come again? And now she’s saying they never even had different opinions on anything? That is so totally healthy, you know. And the implication that that is how a relationship should be. Wow! Fucking spectacular move!

- Just don’t make Winx fight over the Flora and Helia situation! And that was a perfect example of why they don’t need to agree on everything.

- At first I agreed with the opinion I have seen floating around that the emogix are too specific but this is the Magic Dimension. They have teleportation. What is so hard to believe that they have code that can quickly animate specific actions with pre-coded visual parameters about every separate object in the animation?

- I want to see Griselda react to that fireworks explosion!

- That was the big talk? At least they said that disagreements are not inherently bad but still. This was just a damn non-closure to a damn non-problem.

- Well, Obscurum’s plan isn’t so bad but Winx have already not been welcomed by lumens. It isn’t so original.

- Why are Knut and Kiko coming along all of a sudden? Oh, that’s right! Because those lumens are ogres like Knut. How convenient!

- I don’t know what’s so hard to understand about the fact that the lumens obviously believe that Winx have come to steal their treasure and that is why they’re attacking them.

- Tecna needed an analysis to tell that the lumens think they’re enemies and want to steal their treasure? They said that! REPEATEDLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Was the core broken accidentally or on purpose? I missed that part but I don’t think that Valtor has caught on to the fact that breaking the cores will make it much harder for Winx to save the stars. Also, why did he never try to steal the Cosmix light that the Winx put in the dark cores? That would have been an interesting plan!

- Well, Convenient Knut is being awfully convenient! As was planned.

- So now the crystal is actually gonna serve as a core? Wow, what a cop-out.

- You’re telling me that Obscurum was actually the one that thought of the idea of breaking the cores on purpose? This season is really doing Valtor dirty. I just... I can’t watch. Why do they have to be like that?

- Also, he’s only now figuring out he needs to get rid of Bloom? He had that figured out at the beginning of season 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

8x12:

- A wishing star that hasn’t been seen in almost a 1000 years? And he needs Cosmix to get near? How is enhancing his powers going to get him closer to the star if the problem is his darkness? What, is Cosmix gonna conceal his dark powers? Somehow, that doesn’t make sense. But damn, at least this thing is protected from dark powers so that malevolent wishes won’t be made.

- Bloom has her priorities in check and Sky comes third? After Vanessa and the mission? That is a nice change of pace, actually.

- Why doesn’t Bloom just use her goddamn magic?! It would have been so much easier! It’s hers! It’s not like she is forbidden to use it.

- Lmao, Obscurum is acting as if Valtor actually cares about him. And he thinks he’s evil? Wow, that’s cute.

- Is it me or does Vanessa look so much thinner than she used to? Not a fan of that.

- You’re telling me Bloom never made an album for her parents before? But I love the fact that they are sharing and Bloom tells them that she loves home more than anything. That was actually something that the show could have used about 4 seasons ago.

- Why do the Earth lumens look like Roman soldiers?

- Anyone else feel like the transformation of the star yummies into bigger entities is legit based on Pokemon evolution? It really operates the exact same way Pokemon evolution does.

- They’re mentioning the queen’s brother again? In what is not foreshadowing but a plainly obvious non-twist.

- Musa is really disgusted by the star yummies? They actually look pretty cute and fluffy to me. Kinda cuter than the lumens even. Not to mention that they can face monsters and whatnot but they can’t make themselves touch the star yummies? Some Guardian Fairies you are!

- Valtor feels like a nervous teenager about to introduce himself to his crush. What the hell were they thinking?

- I like the designs of the dark giants where the writings on them are concerned. They look like rune rings around their torsos and arms and I actually love the idea of that.

- The scene with Bloom and her parents was pretty good. I love the way she compartmentalized the situation and managed to be on all the fronts she needed to be on even if she had to ask for backup to do it. It was awesome!

- Valtor finally decided to show the fuck up! Halfway through the season! Love how Stella is sassing him! A little surprised that he knows her name, though.

- I don’t think that hugging that last form of star yummy evolution is gonna work. Might be a too big concentration of corrupted lumens in order for the hug thing to work.

- Goblin yummies? Oh, no. Stargoyles. Wow. Okay.

- I love the dilemma that Valtor presented! Bloom really can’t be in two places at the same time! I would be very interested (as I was the first time) if I didn’t know how this ended... aka in disappointment.

8x13:

- Backstory time! What the hell do you mean that Valtor’s life force was drifting through the universe? For years? After the Dragon Fire - that literally made up his whole being - was extinguished? And how the hell was he brought back with the power of the stars? Wtf?

- Bloom, it’s really not that hard to figure out that Obscurum is the queen’s brother! I guessed that the first time I watched this and I didn’t even know she had a brother because I had been clicking through the episodes!

- If Obscurum really thinks that being Valtor’s minion is better than being in the shadow of his sister, then she must have fucked up big time! And I mean, really big time!

- So the artificial cores are not supposed to be that small? That is just a prototype.

- I have a question - how fast do the Specialists’ ships travel for example? Because Twinkly says that she’s traveling at the speed of light but I doubt that the tech can go so fast. Aka my train of thought was what if there are planets in the Magic Dimension that are so far from one another that the people can never meet because the tech doesn’t travel fast enough? Since that seems to be the common method of transportation rather than teleportation which could totes solve that problem.

- I really wish someone other than Sky would be protecting Mike and Vanessa. And wasn’t Valtor saying that only he can stop the Stargoyles? “Cause the Specialists just got rid of all of them. At least the dark giants truly seem to be unstoppable.

- I was so hyped when Bloom said she’d give Cosmix to Valtor! It would have been so interesting to see how they would defeat him if he had Cosmix as well. But they just had Cosmix reject him? Because it has sentience apparently? That was such a fucking cop-out! Just commit to your best ideas goddammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Why is Twinkly getting the artificial core to the Specialists instead of the other Winx? They need it inside the sun! Not on the surface of the Earth.

- Wtf? Didn’t Bloom send Twinkly towards the Earth? She is inside the Sun! What was that maneuvering?!

- So the dark giants would have been defeated when the sun was fixed anyway? Meaning that Bloom could have chosen to go help Winx and that would have solved the dilemma aka there was no actual dilemma, except she didn’t know that? Man, what a bummer!

- Poor Vanessa. Had her birthday almost completely ruined!

- Wasn’t the queen supposed to be powerless? But that moment was so emotional there! And I love the fact that she acted as an example to the lumens to have them freeing the star yummies and helping them change back. Does that mean that the part with the stars is over for this season, though?

- Not a goddamn concert again! Come on! Dedicate the song to your mom, at the very least!!!!!

- Where is Valtor? This doesn’t look like the castle amongst the stars. What happened? Oh, and you’re telling me he has no more magical energy?

- What the hell do you mean that the Trix have power like the power of the Winx? Icy’s power is literally an opposite of Bloom’s!!!!! What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I have been so confused about this ever since I first watched it over a year ago! But at least the Trix were imprisoned separately this time. Someone in this goddamn universe finally had a smart idea!

Part 2 is here.

#winx club #winx bloom #winx musa #winx layla #winx flora #winx stella #winx tecna #winx sky #winx riven #winx nex #bloom x sky #layla x nex #winx valtor #winx obscurum #winx twinkly #winx club season 8 #review #thoughts #part 1

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bbq-hawks-wings · 4 years

Text

BBQ gripes about fanon Hawks

Not even gonna put this in the character tags aside from the spoiler one I use just for the anime-onlies on my blog. I'm salty. I just wanna vent. I want to keep the general character tags fun because it was awful when I went looking for new content and found so much Not Fun material a while back; and I don’t want to become what I hate. Basic point - my blog, my vent, and unless it’s reblogged (which you are welcome to if you like) this post dies here.

Please know this isn't a callout post or me claiming that others are being fans of Hawks "wrong" because they disagree with me. I am a huge proponent that (with very few exceptions) fiction and fandom should be free to be enjoyed, reinterpreted, or otherwise indulged in however the individual fan prefers; and if I don't like it, I let them have their space and go do my thing elsewhere and leave them alone (hence why this not going in character tags). I just have been annoyed with the rampant mangling of Hawks' canon personality/characterization - that is, confusing common fanon interpretations of him with how he’s actually written/portrayed and then getting angry (like, actually-angry-spilling-into-publicly-dragging-real-people, not just disappointed) when he acts like canon Hawks in canon. Non-canon is open season and by and large has my blessing, it’s just frustrating when it gets dragged into discussions about the manga.

This has been going on a long time, but I just want to get it out of my system in my personal space. All this is, is my "Overthinking Tumblr blogger Shakes Fist at Cloud" moment.

#1 Hawks is a sociopath/unempathetic.

I just... I... You can't be reading the same manga I am if you genuinely come to this conclusion about who he is in canon. A man with nothing to gain by looking like this when considering the depths of the suffering inflicted on others that he bears some amount of responsibility in...

...cannot be called unempathetic.

"But he killed Twice and Best Jeanist!"

Twofold counterargument to this one, starting with BJ - we don't actually know he's dead. There's a body, there's a disappearance, and we have no idea wtf happened, but we also don't know wtf happened. It's drastically ooc for Hawks to murder someone in cold blood. For someone who places emphasis on speed specifically "because when two sides keep fighting and won’t give up, someone eventually has to die" it makes no sense for him to not have had a plan and simply ambush a man in his own home - this goes doubly since he was in contact with the HSPC and had time to "premeditate" anyway.

And as for Twice: Hawks ran out of options. He wanted to detain Twice and keep him from escaping and helping the MLA. He was able to do so when alone, but the moment Dabi cornered him Hawks had a choice to make - probably die in the fight and let Jin go or make absolute certain he can’t and still probably end up dying because he's in bad shape and still probably won't make it out of this, regardless. I don't need to harp on this - it's been said a couple different times now by several people. Even in 266 when Dabi initially ambushes Hawks, Hawks thinks to himself that he’ll carry Jin out of the building to keep himself and Jin safe before Twice retaliated and Dabi literally forces Hawks into a corner.

Jin's loss was a blow, but the chips on the table being wagered are human lives, not feelings. Up until that point, Hawks did everything he could despite the weight of his decision. Human life is human life, and Jin’s life isn’t more important than the may more who will be saved by quashing the MLA’s revolution. Simply equating “could kill someone” with “unempathetic” is fundamentally flawed, and mistaking someone who is pushed to kill despite every attempt to avoid it as unempathetic and even sociopathic has missed the point to the extreme - the mere fact he avoided lethal force for so long alone proves he possesses empathy.

#2 Hawks is a compulsive liar.

He is a good liar, but he does not like lying. He does twist the truth, but always when forced to keep a secret. Even then, his lies are predominantly spun from truth and omitted details instead of outright fabrications. He doesn’t gaslight, and he doesn’t make up stories/details if he can help it.

When Hawks told Endeavor his dreams for the future, that was the truth. When he told him he thought he was cool at the hero billboards, that was the truth. When he tells Tokoyami to focus on his strengths instead of merely covering his weaknesses to be a better hero, that was the truth. When Tokoyami asks Hawks for his weakness and even why he took him on as an intern in the beginning just to ignore him, he tells him the truth. When he tells Jin he "doesn't belong in a cage" and that he considers him a good person, that was the truth. When he recognizes he’s profoundly wounded Jin for deceiving him for months, he tells Jin the truth. When confronted by Dabi and he doesn’t need to lie anymore in this fight to the death, he tells him the truth despite not actually needing to in hopes to learn the truth behind Dabi and Shigaraki.

I don't have a better segue, so I'll just mention that a lot of folks who believe this also believe the next point.

#3 Hawks is unapologetically emotionally manipulative.

The context makes a huge difference and we need to look at when and why he manipulates others as well as the fact that he does.

At the hero billboards, Hawks plays the heroes on stage as well as the crowd. He's trying to shift the mindset of, "oh yeah, just another hero ranking" to "wake up, mf's, things are changing and you better be ready to change, too!" Rocking the boat is a huge no-no in Japan. Despite being part of his “persona” there is still real social risk involved with this move but one that he deems necessary to turn heads and get gears turning. This is not just an elaborate ploy to get under Endeavor’s skin, but an effort to reach a wider audience while he has them captive.

He does use the public crowd around him and Endeavor before the Hood fight as an excuse for its appearance, but the original intent was to mentally prepare Endeavor for what was potentially (and proved to be) the fight of his life without outright telling him so he could maintain his undercover status. When he realizes he’s part of the reason for Endeavor’s permanent scar and life-threatening injuries, he feels remorse.

He lies to Jin to get information out of him, but linking back to #2, when calls Jin a good person and offers him a way out, he’s telling the truth. He does feel guilt for having to manipulate an otherwise well-meaning person and betraying them, especially given his long-running history of being used and the ongoing issues he suffers from because of it.

When he meets up again with Endeavor to drop his clues about the League’s movements, he squirms when he realizes the interns don’t know him well enough to know he’s blowing smoke because he does NOT want these kids to actually buy what he’s selling. This espionage mission is hard to navigate, and he has to tread carefully lest he setup the dominoes in the wrong places.

This is all to make the point that Hawks is more than capable of emotionally manipulating people, but it’s not in his nature or something he does to any and every person he comes across just because. We haven’t had much opportunity to see him operate outside of the HSPC’s orders which is where the bulk of the instances of his manipulation comes from - those orders requiring him to operate covertly and thus, by nature, necessitate lying, manipulation, and strategically withholding information.

If anything, when he’s making an appeal to someone else as his own person - not as a hero on a mission- we actually see a level of vulnerability and transparency we don’t otherwise catch.

Though it’s technically canon-adjacent and not necessarily canon in and of itself, in My Hero Academia: Team Up Mission where he works with Bakugo and Midoriya he operates on a level of transparency with them we’re not used to seeing; and my theory is he took it as an opportunity to operate without ulterior motives and build report instead of bucking back against “training up the next generation of heroes” like he initially did with Tokoyami.

Which now actually segues better into the next point.

#4 Hawks never lets people get close to him.

There’s a surprising amount of evidence that Hawks wants the ability to be an open book. Back at Team Up Mission, the restaurant staff note he regularly takes people he likes to their establishment - so we’re basically told outright this is a special place to him reserved for enjoying himself and only people he likes get to share it with him - so we already know what that says about how he sees those two despite their sparse interactions. We already know he’s taken Endeavor there when Endeavor made no move to input as to where he wanted to have the lunch meeting.

Though he kept Tokoyami at arm’s length initially, we have at least three canon instances of him sharing personal interactions with him with other canon-adjacent indications he cares for and values his intern. We’ve readily established that while Endeavor may not consider himself close to Hawks, Hawks does hold Endeavor as near and dear to his heart. While his only mission regarding Twice was to get information out of him, he still made a genuine effort to help and save him because he wanted to and considered him a friend despite the circumstances.

We still don’t know very much of Hawk’s past, his personal relationships outside of work, etc.; but despite the HPSC’s extensive efforts to strip him of his identity he not only possesses a faceted, complicated personality but seems to want to share that with others readily when and in the ways he’s able. Getting into the truly squishy, vulnerable parts of him may take a while, but on a scale of closed to open, he seems to lean towards open.

#5 Hawks is hopelessly in love with Dabi and will abandon everything up to this point for him.

This isn't to throw general DabiHawks shippers under the bus. Most of them know VERY well at this point that canon has sunk that ship, and they're just having fun with it at this point - and you know what, power to you! They look great together! In another life, the character chemistry could have been incredible. There’s a lot of great DabiHawks shipping content I thoroughly enjoy despite not shipping it myself.

It just isn't canon. It never was and never came close. Even now, with the Endeavor reveal being very much imminent, Hawks' view of Dabi is one of a lying, malicious, callous, murderer. Though he’ll likely be crushed at the revelation of what Endeavor’s done, that doesn’t equate to him defecting (especially not immediately) and falling into Dabi’s arms.

And Dabi hates Hawks just as much.

Again, this is not anything against the ship or the shippers - just an annoyance I have with some who were so wrapped up in the ship they were genuinely mad when the ship sank and they dragged that frustration out into the real world against real people when canon didn’t align with fanon.

Ships are some of the most stupid things to rail against creators and fans over, and the amount of harassment they receive now over shipping has me ripping my hair out when I know it’s a mere fraction of the total pool of shippers who are frothing at the mouth while the rest are super cool and happy doing their own thing and keeping to themselves.

Ship what you want, regardless of “validating evidence” and have fun. Don’t make it others’ problem when it isn’t canonically validated.

#6 Hawks is a dirty cop.

Only half upset with this one because it comes down to the nuance and lack of precise definition of this phrase I have a problem with. Lots of people hate cops for very real, legitimate reasons. Police forces - being a voluntary, government-employed force enforcing government rule - are notoriously prone to corruption of every kind.

It's implied the HPSC is itself corrupt, though to what extent we don't know. (Granted, buying a young child from his family to raise as your personal puppet is pretty high up there.) By continuing to follow orders from the HPSC and not vehemently fighting back, many see him as reinforcing a corrupt institution and at least partially liable for their continued hold on society.

Fair enough, but... The issue I have with this is it reduces Hawks to his job.

I believe a huge chunk of this take comes from my experience as an armed service member spouse, but it's easy for me to empathize with a guy

Who was promised the moon for himself and his family in exchange for his service not realizing what was actually being asked of him

Is praised outside the organization for "being a hero" and "upholding this country's core values" while first-hand witnessing the corruption of it when inside

Is viewed as a cog valuable only in services rendered instead of being treated like a human by said organization and worked into the ground because of it

Is frustrated by the insistence to keep the status quo instead of improving procedure/infrastructure/environment because egos need to be padded over real, human problems being solved

Has his autonomy or otherwise ability to operate under his own judgement restricted in favor of maintaining organizational control at the cost of effective action

Has DEPENDENTS who rely on his continued work to provide for them and is thus unable to refuse an order, even when it's morally reprehensible and even outright illegal

Whose cries, both those calculated and desperate, to the organization (who have placed themselves as the sole resource he can turn to) for help (even for his own body/mind) fall on deaf ears until he breaks to the point of becoming unusable or dangerous - and even then minimal effort/responsibility is taken in favor of keeping him functioning in the organization as long as possible.

Hawks fights back against the HPSC constantly. He raised concerns over letting civilians suffer to get him in with the League of Villains and then still defied orders by reducing casualties to zero. Despite orders to keep his mission top secret, he's informed Endeavor of his motives/movements independently from the rest of the heroes. He had long refused to take an intern (read: fresh meat for the machine) to train until this year, and even then sought to minimize his encouragement of Tokoyami for as long as possible until he realized Tokoyami was made of the real mettle people needed in a hero and not just another youngster endangering himself on a pipe dream.

He even takes initiative to keep his personal to-do list from the HPSC to a minimum by squashing problems before they come knocking asking him to fix it for them. He knew of the League of Villains and anticipated the escalation of their movements immediately after the USJ incident as well as has a network of informants and connections with local police forces to stay in the know.

His methods for apprehension of criminals are, and continue to be, to react and detain them so quickly they can't retaliate or endanger others in the struggle, thus minimizing human loss and injury despite the insinuation the HPSC has told him that gloves are off in the current situation.

He might be "a cop" depending on the definition we go with, but he isn't a dirty cop. He doesn't plant evidence. He doesn't shoot first and ask questions later. He doesn't blindly take orders. He largely doesn't see "villains" as dirt under his shoe but as people pushed to extremes. He's a morally convicted individual trying to rebel within the system instead of tearing it down outright. He may be wrong in the assumption, but he genuinely believes he can do more on the inside of the system than outside.

#7 Hawks is a manwhore.

Ok, this one is not serious and actually just to end this all on a lighter note after ranting until I'm blue in the face.

I'm 100% guilty of this myself. Something about that chicken makes me and many others salivate - either for themselves or to watch him with someone else. We love dressing him up slutty, portray him as flirting unashamedly, and placing him in as many overtly sexual scenarios possible.

The best part about all of it, though, is that it’s almost the exact opposite of how he dresses/conducts himself in canon. His clothes are loose fitting and high-coverage. He’s personable, but never gives any indication he’s romantically/sexually involved or interested in anyone. The asscourse is real only because we cannot confirm either way due to his baggy clothes. His overall figure/body shape has been hinted at, but only recently confirmed; and his jacket had to be literally be burned off to get a good look at the pattern of his shirt under it!

~~~~~~~

And with that, I release the frustration and move on.

Enjoy fanon as much as you like - even I do! Just be aware of where canon and fanon diverge, and definitely don’t take the difference out on real people. Please also be aware of how others hold their favorite characters dear before flooding the general tags with negativity and creating a hostile environment for them. People latch onto their “comfort characters” for a plethora of reasons, and when they lose that character to the plot, the fandom, or otherwise, they should still be allowed to grieve and celebrate what they had in a safe environment.

Retaliation in response to others coming against your favorite is also not acceptable behavior. It sucks, but the most mature thing to do is step away from the general fandom, stick to blogs/spaces you know are safe, and let the storm blow over. Comfort characters do not justify mistreating real people no matter how much they may mean to you.

When “canon gets it wrong” is where fanfiction and pockets of the fandom community comes into play. Leave those people alone and let them be. For those who aligned themselves with canon, they are not free game to take personal frustrations out on. Leave those people alone and let them be. Unfollow the people/tags you need to for your own sake and others’, and the fandom will be a better place all around over time. Venting belongs in controlled spaces away from the rest of the fandom and with enough warning for those who not only don’t want to endure it but who for their own safety shouldn’t.

Fandom is a community, and healthy communities do not endorse members lashing out when they don’t get their way.

#spoiler!hawks #let's talk hawks

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beansthembo · 4 years

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I need to do a bit of a vent about the new Star Wars movie. Spoilers below.

I’m having some trouble processing what happened. If you’re reading this, you probably are interested in my opinion on it, and you probably also know that I was a big fan of The Last Jedi. By no means was it a perfect movie, but it took the chance of distancing itself from the rest of the series by springing off of what was established in TFA and building something new. A lot of people weren’t too pleased by this, and there are plenty of legitimate criticisms, but being completely transparent, I can’t listen to most critics of it because most of the people I know in real life who didn’t like it are racist or misogynistic.

TLJ tried to introduce people to the idea that, in reference to the new canon, just because it’s new and different, doesn’t mean that it’s bad. Kylo’s/Ben’s line, “Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to,” finds meaning in this, though a bit extreme. TLJ was going to learn from the past films and move on, for better or worse. TROS is determined to wallow in its past. As a lifetime fan of Star Wars, I can’t bring myself to hate it outright, like many vocal critics of TLJ, but I find myself severely disappointed by the decisions made in it.

I’ve honestly spent too much time composing those last paragraphs, as if I’m a legit critic or reviewer. I’m just kind of going to present my nitpicks and criticisms as they come to me.

So, first a few nitpicks:

-The opening crawl seems... poorly composed to me. The first line is “The dead speak!” Correct me if I’m wrong, but they don’t usually use exclamations in the opening crawls. I know I just spent the last couple of paragraphs defending new ideas, but the opening crawl always seemed as though they were meant to present information formally from a neutral perspective. Not a major criticism, but it did bother me a bit.

-What happened to Kyle’s TIE Silencer? I mean, it could’ve been destroyed in the previous movie, but I don’t really remember that happening. Either way, it seemed to me that they made the decision to make his ship more similar to the Interceptor, as, like, a ‘safer’ choice, but I don’t see why they couldn’t have just had the same ship.

-The Falcon has a round dish again? You know, now that I’m thinking of it, the dish may have been blasted off in TLJ. I just was surprised by that.

I may add to that list later. the actual problems I had were:

-Rey is sort of obsessed with ‘earning’ Luke’s (and Anakin’s) old lightsaber. Which has been repaired, by the way. She doesn’t actually ‘own’ it, even though she’s been using it for the past two movies, she’s just been borrowing it from Leia. I was really looking forward to seeing her make her own (or already have her own) lightsaber, which she does, but she waits until the end of the movie to show it off. And it’s rad as hell! Wtf? why couldn’t she have been using that the whole time! It’s one of my favorite lightsaber designs now and they show it for a whole two seconds!

-They finally give Snoke a backstory, and it’s... that he was Palpatine’s puppet the whole time. I’m gonna say, not the worst backstory they could have done, but they really tried to make him just not matter at all. I mean, yeah, the way he was done off with in TLJ was pretty unceremonious, but I always felt that meant that the real big bad was meant to be Kyle all along. Instead, the Skywalker saga becomes the Palpatine saga. I’m not opposed to the concept of Palpatine surviving and attempting to resurrect the Sith, but that’s something I’d expect from a novel, not the main story of the final movie in the franchise. And, honestly, regardless of whether or not Snoke was secretly Plagueis, I always thought he was supposed to be some other ye olde sith master, not just some sort of failed clone(?)

-Kyle rebuilds his fuUcking helmet. Why? What purpose does it serve? He doesn’t even wear it most of the time. The longest period he wears it is when the First Order officers comment on it. He’s just being dramatic. Which, I suppose, would be in character, but after the scene in which he shatters it in TLJ, it seems pointless.

-Another nitpick, but when they expand upon Rey and Kyle’s ability to connect through the force, it seems a little... disjointed. I do like that they took the time to expand upon that, even though I thought Rey closing the Falcon’s ramp on him at the end of TLJ was symbolic of her cutting him off, the way they presented it seemed, well, off. Like, it makes sense if you take it at face value, but if you start to think about it at all, it sort of... weird. I dunno how to describe it. Like, they interact with each other’s environments, but can’t see what they can interact with until they interact with it, and they can trade items, and... yeah.

-The big one... Rey’s a Palpatine. Her father was Sheev’s son. (When did that happen, huh? Who’d want to get with that wrinkly mess?) Why the everloving fuck couldn’t Rey just have been Rey? Why did she have to be related to someone existing in the franchise already? JJ’s going around saying that this was his plan the whole time, which is bull fucking shit, because otherwise they would have communicated this to Ryan, and I’m pretty sure TROS was originally going to have another director in the first place, and ALSO I’m pretty sure JJ did say at some point that Rey’s parents only mattered to her. While I’m on the topic of fan theories and origins, nobody in the movies was ever concerned about who Snoke really was. They knew who he was-the Bad Guy. Nobody ever cared who the Emperor really was in 1983, so why was Snoke’s death and non-explained origins such a big deal? I have more conflicted thoughts than I can even put down, so i’m gonna move on.

-Oh, before I forget, they just completely write off Rose. She’s present, but they minimize her screen time. I get that a lot of people didn’t like her, and there are some valid criticisms of her that aren’t completely rooted in racism and misogyny, but I never found any problem with her. I actually felt she was pretty relatable. She meets a hero, trips over her own words, and then learns why you should never meet your heroes. Disillusioned, she’s about to turn him in but they come up with another plan, and together they visit a world full of people she joined the Resistance to get away from. I’ve got that same feeling about those sorts of things-while I do enjoy a decent amount of privilege, I still, you know, fight against the system that gave it to me. And I can’t stand to see people abuse others just because they don’t have that privilege, so hearing her speech about wanting to punch a hole through that city did mean a lot at some level. Then, at the end, when she’s like, “this is how we win. Not by fighting what we hate, but saving what we love,” I can even relate to that. It’s when, like, you explain to a kid how you hate something, and they jump on the bandwagon, and get real angsty, and then you’re like, “no no no that’s not what I wanted you to learn!” It’s hard to describe it with my rapidly deteriorating attention, but I never thought she was a bad character.

-DJ wasn’t in it! I mean, he wasn’t the most important character, but I still wanted to see him again.

-They have this fake out where they pretend Chewie was dead for a whole 20 seconds. I totally called it, too-the ship he was supposedly in blew up (or rather, Rey blew it up with force lightning accidentally), but since he didn’t die on screen in front of us, I knew it had to be a fake out. And it seems like the only reason for that was so they can find out that Hugs was the traitor, who is only betraying the First Order to see Kyle lose, which I mean fair, but then he’s unceremoniously killed off by the new big officer guy who we’ve never seen before but was supposedly one of the Emperor’s top men. I don’t think his name was even mentioned in the movie-or if it was, it had zero staying power. Also, they have this part where Threepio had his memory erased for a while before being backed up by Artoo. The lead up to it was very dramatic- Threepio’s generally been a comic relief character up to this point, and now he’s got to give his life for the cause (He had a translation of some Sith runes in his memory, but his programming prevented him from saying the translation aloud, and his memory needed to be wiped in order to access it), but as soon as his memory is wiped they do not give two shits that one of their best friends basically died right in front of them. Then Artoo brings him back and still no one cares.

-Poe and Finn do have a nice dynamic in the movie, but then we find one of Poe’s exes and he starts flirting with her and its like no Poe your husband’s right tHERE POE DON’T DO IT (and don’t dismiss this as shipper nonsense because John Boyega and Oscar Isaac both wanted FinnPoe to be a thing and acted through the movies like it was already don’t you say this is the first you’re hearing of this)

-The way that Rey defeats Palpatine is by crossing lightsabers in front of him to deflect his lightning?

-Reylo is canon NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (Insert the gif of Vader yelling no at the end of ROTS)

-Also why does it always have to be a planet destroying superweapon? I know legends did that a lot but there doesn’t always have to be one for there to be stakes.

I think there was other stuff, but my brain is too scattered at this point to make any more cohesive thoughts. I mean, there was a lot of stuff I did like about it- Lando’s back! And i think Wedge is too, but he was on screen for about a second and a half, so I couldn’t tell. It was confirmed that Leia had force training, and even had a lightsaber! And I do like that they’re taking some inspiration from Legends, but I’m pretty sure Dark Empire was not one of the most popular series’ from it. I also did like Ben seeing a vision of Han; It’s not entirely clear if it was a force ghost thing (I am of the belief that Han was at leas a little force sensitive) or if it was just Ben sort of coming to terms with his actions, but the scene was pretty well done in my opinion. Also, Rey taking the name Skywalker at the end. That was nice, like she chose her family.

Now I just remembered a couple of things-Finn was basically confirmed to be force sensitive, but the way they did it felt very ham-fisted. Like, they weren’t like “he felt a disturbance wink wink nudge nudge,” they were like “HERE IS SOME SUBTEXT THAT ISN’T ACTUALLY SUBTEXT SEE HERE” like they never outright say it but it would have been less insulting if they did. Also, they introduced a force healing thing, which has been a more of a thing in the games, but we’ve never seen it on screen before. But like, Rey dies at the end and Ben brings her back and then [REDACTED] and then he dies, even though, like, a lot of things. I don’t know I’ve been typing for way too long I need off.

Anyway, it felt good to vent, thanks for reading if you did. I give TROS 6.5/10.

#Star Wars #star wars spoilers #the rise of skywalker #the rise of skywalker spoilers #vent

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makeste · 5 years

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BnHA Chapter 177: Construction Site Clash

Previously on BnHA: Deku confronted Gentle outside of a tea shop. Gentle sprang into action and revealed his quirk: elasticity. Basically he’s Monkey D. Luffy but instead of making himself stretchy and bouncy, he can do it to anything he touches, including the ground and even the damn air. Deku charged at him and promptly got flung waaaay back, but Gentle and La Brava realized how strong he is (and La Brava recognized him from his batshit insane fight against Todoroki in the sports festival where he broke all off his fingers just to prove a fucking point) and tried to run, not wanting to go toe to toe with him. Probably a good call, because after getting bounced into the air, Deku -- thinking about Eri and Jirou and everyone else who’s been looking forward to the cultural festival -- unleashed his new long-range Delaware Smash: Air Force attack. Then he grabbed Gentle by the collar and flung him into a fucking building. Damn, Deku.

Today on BnHA: Deku has a weird conversation with Gentle while the latter dangles from a construction beam. Gentle tries to reason with Deku and explain how his plan is somehow going to be a win-win situation for everyone. Deku calls bullshit and then lies and says the authorities are on their way, so Gentle cheerfully leaps back into action and starts using his quirk to springboard all over the place Gran Torino style so that Deku can’t get in a clean shot. He then tries to drop a giant steel beam onto a hapless old man, forcing Deku to jump in and save him. While he’s occupied, Gentle and La Brava take the opportunity to flee. We get an update on the time -- it’s now 8:45 a.m., t-minus 15 minutes to the start of the festival -- and then we cut back to Deku, who gets real mad and lifts the beam with only one fucking hand while aiming another air gun attack at Gentle with the other. La Brava is all “oh shit this kid doesn’t give up” and says that she’ll have to use her quirk.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 202 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

you guys. it’s February 3rd 2019 and I’ve just watched the worst, most mind-numbingly boring Superbowl in history. wtf was that. BnHA please help me wash the bad taste out of my mouth please and thank you

lmao oh my god

do you guys remember that scene from Avengers where Bruce Banner wakes up in an abandoned building and Harry Dean Stanton thoughtfully gives him some pants. for some reason this reminded me of that. “well then, son, you’ve got a condition”

now La Brava’s running over from a nearby roof and she’s all “DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT POPS”

she says they’re just shooting a film, and she’s asking him to let the neighbors know as well

well this is the most transparent lie of all time

(ETA: or is it just transparent enough to work!)

and even she’s thinking that it’s probably not going to buy them much time and that their plans have basically been foiled and they have to retreat

and now we’re cutting to inside of the building

on the one hand, it’s a cool setting and conveniently empty so that no one will get hurt! but on the other hand, this looks like the perfect place for someone to land the wrong way on a rebar and get accidentally impaled. please no one get impaled. we had enough impalings in the last arc

Deku’s thinking grateful thoughts about Mei and flashing back to when she gave him the details about his new gloves

yeah I’m just going to post this, not even gonna try and sum it up

(ETA: might wanna think about using a different font in the future if you want to avoid any confusion when typing out the word “flick”, Jaimini)

she sure knows a lot about his OFA capabilities, huh? thankfully she’s the type who gets so caught up in whatever she’s currently focused on that she would never in a million years note the many, many similarities between Deku’s quirk and All Might’s

also, interestingly, Deku is thinking a “thank you” to Mina as well!

because he apparently incorporated her “special dance training” into his attack?? omg what. “dance-off, bro. you and me”

Gentle is such a wacky fellow he might actually do it too

oh my lord

see what I mean

also hush, Deku. it’s called “flair” okay?

now Gentle is grinning like a loon and saying that he’ll execute his plan no matter what. “this is my resolve”

your resolve is stupid, Gentle. there, I said it. I love you but you lost this one pal. stop trying to attack a bunch of teenagers who are just trying to have a fun and wholesome time at school

Deku’s yelling at him. “you’re no gentleman!”

wow, harsh Deku

now he’s asking what Gentle is planning

meanwhile La Brava is hopping the fence and entering the construction site, and this overly trusting man from earlier has been completely fooled

lol she should just make something up. “uh...” [okay, just be cool, La Brava. just pick something reasonable] “...Animal Planet.” [nailed it]

now she’s sprinting over to where Deku and Gentle are and getting ready to film again

lol

so Deku is telling him that the school is on high security alert and the alarms will sound even before he can get in and he’ll definitely be caught, and on top of that the festival will be called off

this motherfucker is genuinely trying to negotiate with him lmao

Deku’s all “THAT’S EVEN WORSE” and Gentle is all “lol yeah I guess” omg

and now he (Gentle) is all “well, so that’s my plan, now if you don’t mind I’d like to get back at it”

oh snap

well at least he’s a better liar than La Brava

uh oh, Gentle is activating his quirk again it looks like

he’s springboarding off the floor and shouting “BEGONE, STUDENT OF U.A.”

outstanding use of the word “begone”, Gentle my good man

anyway, so he’s bouncing around and Deku is watching and trying to predict his movements

and Gentle is getting ready to springboard again

that probably isn’t good for the building

-- oh for fuck’s...

so all that time training with Gran Torino was for nothing?

wtf, now what??

did he just get hit? what’s going on

Gentle is saying “if you can use an air bullet, allow me to counter with an air barrier”

wait, what? so is the idea to reflect Deku’s attack back on him?

oh wait. or did Deku just walk into an elastic patch of air and get bounced back? is that what it is?

La Brave is telling Gentle that they need to retreat, and yeah they really should

but instead, Gentle is removing a bolt from one of the beams

did he do that with his bare (well, gloved, but you know what I mean) hands?? just like that? either this construction is shoddy as hell, or else this is the single most unrealistic thing I’ve ever seen in this manga about kids with superpowers and bird heads and astronomical high school entrance exam budgets

anyway, now he’s bouncing on the beam and it’s vibrating

he says he can’t consciously deactivate his quirk

interesting. also potentially pretty dangerous and certainly inconvenient

but objects turn back to normal given a little time

and that’s what’s happening with this beam oh snap

well but I mean, as soon as you manhandled that screw loose -- did he use his quirk for that? is that why it was so easy? -- it was pretty clear what you intended to do

and by the way, dropping a steel beam onto a 16-year-old is pretty damn metal for someone who’s supposedly a gentleman villain

oh shit wait

damn, dropping it onto an unsuspecting old man who’s not even a fighter is even more metal

but thankfully Deku is Deku

nice, Deku

now he’s getting all outraged and “DID YOU JUST TRY TO DROP IT ON THAT INNOCENT OLD MAN”

oh, Gentle

c’mon, Gentle. c’mon. you tried to kill a dude. just admit it. that was not nice

(ETA: is La Brava still filming all this?? did the cops eventually get this footage? Gentle’s gonna be put away for attempted fucking murder. sorry dude)

now the old dude is finally running away, and meanwhile Gentle seemingly intends to just leave Deku here...?

ffff now he’s making the crane bendy??

and he’s telling Deku he’s sure someone will find him. lol what the hell is he going to do

Deku’s thinking to himself that they’re going to infiltrate the festival at this rate, and he has to act

omg yay we’re cutting back to 1-A!

lmaooooo Kaminari really didn’t end up sleeping a wink, huh. he was so hyped up

BAKUGOU, PUT ON YOUR T-SHIRT!! WE MADE IT JUST FOR THE OCCASION!!

I wish I could read what they say underneath the A? Toko’s shirt seems to start with “BN” (if they say bnha I s2g), but Momo’s shirt looks different. maybe an error though

(ETA: so as we eventually learn, they say “A Band”, and the delightful story behind this exceptionally creative name is the topic of today’s omake!)

the dancing team is also getting dressed, and they’ve got their own special costumes which are cute but I’m not gonna post the panel because Mineta is ruining it. how come no one ever drops a steel beam on him

Shouto is wearing one of the class A t-shirts, so I guess the staging team is rocking those too

anyway he’s asking where Deku went, and Aoyama says he went to buy rope

and now Shouto’s “is my boyfriend in danger” senses are tingling

this is a reasonable concern because as we all know, if you leave Deku alone for more than five minutes he will inevitably run into a villain. in hindsight they never should have let him leave

meanwhile Aoyama is already thinking about backup plans, oh damn

fully serious, if you combined Aoyama’s ingenuity with Mina’s they’d make a pretty unstoppable team. these kids are creative as fuck

ohhh, Gentle was just using the crane to launch himself and La Brava into the air towards U.A.

damn, dude doesn’t even care that Deku supposedly put out the alert. he says that if they make it in even with U.A. on the lookout for them, his name will become even more recognized

what are you trying to accomplish though, dude, in all seriousness? do you know what’s going to happen if U.A. suffers another break-in after all of the security measures they supposedly put in place, and after they insisted on holding the cultural festival despite police objections? they’ll be fucking shut down is what. this will be the third villain incident in less than six months. people are not going to be happy about that. best case, they’ll be allowed to stay open but with a ton of restrictions in place. basically you’ll make it harder than ever for them to do their job, when right now the world needs them more than ever. they’re raising the next generation of heroes here, and this is a post-All Might world. so maybe just cut them some slack, jesus christ

and now we’re cutting back to Deku, straining under the beam

come on Deku, you got this. powerlift this bitch

LOL OHHHHH SHIT

WHY DIDN’T YOU JUST PUT IT DOWN YOU NIMROD LMAO. “LOOK AT ME, I’M DEKU, ALL MIGHT’S SUCCESSOR! I CAN LIFT STEEL BEAMS WITH ONE HAND AND FIRE AIR CANNONS AT VILLAINS WITH THE OTHER”

oh damn. and it seems we’re finally going to get to see La Brava’s quirk! about fucking time. bring it

BONUS: what should we name the band?

“Electric Spark Kids”, Kaminari? really?? you really do just blurt out whatever the fuck pops into your head huh. (actually tbh this is my favorite name out of all of them)

Tokoyami has a fucking obsession with banquets. I really want to know how he ended up latching onto this out of all the “___ of darkness” things he could have possibly chosen. fwiw I did find out there is a song called Banquet in the Darkness which I haven’t actually listened to because the album art alone is frankly terrifying to me and I somewhat regret having looked this up

there is also a band called Ore, though I assume it’s intended to be the English definition of the word rather than Bakugou’s intended meaning. but it just goes to show you that it��s impossible to be original anymore no matter what you do

and then Momo is just... it’s a band... representing class A... band... A... band... A Band? and Jirou is just like OMG THAT’S THE GREATEST IDEA EVER despite the fact that it clearly is the most half-assed idea anyone has ever come up with. she just loves Momo that much. and is also desperate to stop the boys from coming up with any more suggestions lmao

by the way I just want to say that all of the kids are absolutely adorable in this sketch and it’s easily one of my favorite omakes for that reason alone. so stinking cute omg

#bnha #boku no hero academia #midoriya izuku #gentle (bnha)#la brava #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #makeste reads bnha #I honestly don't know why todoroki is the only one going 'but guys where's midoriya'#it's like they haven't learned a damn thing #something important is about to happen and deku's missing?#what are you all waiting for #sound the alarm #spoiler alert: it's villains #some villains are up to no good yet again and deku is involved because of course he is #maybe one of these days they'll figure this out #in the meantime you keep honing those instincts shouto

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ialreadyreadthatfanfic · 5 years

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Charles Xavier Is A Huge Dick: The Movie

or,

X-Men: Dark Phoenix

Hey, if you haven’t seen the movie yet and don’t want to be spoiled, you probably should stop reading!

I watched the new X-Men movie. Not only I’m that annoying cinema-goer that sits behind you and mocks the movie audibly during the seance, oh no, I’m also that annoying cinema-goer that comes back home and makes a bitchy tumblr post about the movie.

But, guys, that was so bad.

First off: I’m convinced that upon reading the script, James MacAvoy and Sophie Turner instantly lost the will to act, because we’ve all certainly seen far better performances from both of them.

My other theory is that the director simply told them not to bother, because this was, as far as I can tell, a deliberate franchise-killer.

The scene-by-scene description of the train-wreck under the cut for the curious.

PROLOGUE

We open the movie with the scene where young Jean Grey and her parents are in car crash, because Jean Cannot Control Her Powers. The kid survives; the parents aren’t so lucky. This scene is generally inoffensive, if predictable.

From now on, young Jean Grey behaves like a kid-shaped robot. Someone please write her better dialogue.

Charles Xavier arrives at the hospital, confirms her parents are dead, somewhat unenthusiastically delivers some well-worn platitudes and whisks her away to his school.

Hey, mutant powers are like pens. Especially the ones you can’t control, because sometimes pens go on a rampage and stab people in the eyes, you know, unintentionally.

(No, seriously, they went with that metaphor.)

TITLES - BACK TO THE FUTURE - or 1992, I guess, one cheer for 90s nostalgia

In effort to remind us humans that as a species we did some cool things on our way to ruining the planet, we watch the launch of a space shuttle.

Suddenly Houston, we have a problem. A sentient solar flare or something is attacking the brave astronauts! Oh no! Who’re we gonna call?!

Charles Xavier!

Like literally, the Mr. President of US of A calls Charles Xavier, like Chuck, are you watching the TV rn?, and Xavier’s like, already giddy with anticipation, Why yes, Mr. President, I see you are in a spot of trouble, and Mr. President’s like, Sooo, Chuck, I literally HATE TO ASK, BUT... and Xavier’s like, practically bouncing with glee, BUT OF COURSE, X-MEN TO THE RESCUE!!!

So Chuck sends off his chicks. Nominally, the team is under Mystique’s command. There also Hank, and baby-faced Storm, and even more baby-faced Kurt Wagner, oh yeah JEAN, she’s there too bc PLOT, and Scott was along too. Did I forget anyone?

I forgot someone, didnt I?

OH YEAH, the Quicksilver was there too. Considering how cool he was in earlier movie(s?), it’s kinda sad that he’s largely inconsequential here and I forgot about his existence about halfway through.

Charles calls Houston on the Cerebro like a huge showoff he is, and the X-Men proceed to rescue the astronauts from weird-looking space cloud (which is of course the Phoenix Force, or whatever comics call it). There’s some cool looking scenes here where X-Men use their powers, but they’re just window dressing for the main plot:

Charles Xavier is being a huge dick, backseat driving this mission through Cerebro and not trusting Mystique’s judgement.

BTW, Mystique might be the only character in the movie who behaves like a sensible person, which is why she’s not there for very long.

Anyway the scene goes like this:

Mystique: we saved ALL BUT ONE astronaut! Coming back for that one guy is super risky and probably will only lead to more deaths! I’m cutting my loses like sensible field leader!

Prof X: OH NO YOU WON’T get back for that one guy or the whole mission is a failure!!!

Mystique: WTF??!! That’s crazy, we will get killed!

Prof X: But it’s better to throw away our lives than have less than 100% record on rescue mission, because if we give humans even slightest pretext, they will instantly revert back to hating us, see? The President will stop taking my calls, people will want to arrest us for property damage, and neutralize our powers and stick us in prison for mutants.

Mystique: ...seriously, why am I on your side again?!

Prof X: Just have Kurt take Jean to the shuttle and she’ll hold it intact while he looks for the guy! Raven, I want to remind you I can bitch at you telepathically anytime, anywhere, for the rest of your life!

Mystique: DAMN YOU FINE

So they do it. Kurt manages to rescue the guy, but not Jean. The shuttle blows to bits around her. We are supposed to be sad for 2 seconds there, but then the Phoenix Flare swallows her, she survives, X-Men return to Earth with the astronauts and are showered with praise from adoring masses who stand there with cutesy sings to welcome them upon landing. Whatever.

Jean has a conversation with Scott where they mack on each other and she reassures him She’s Never Been Better, Really, I Feel Great After That Traumatic Experience, and Scott is like, IDK but okay?? I guess??

And Hank checks her out too, and her power is OVER NINE THOUSAAAAND, but Jean’s like, chill, I feel greeeeeat, so Hank’s like, the only problem with this situation is that I need to design a better power-meter!! Ha ha!

Meanwhile, back to plot A, where Charles Xavier continues to be a huge dick. Mystique calls him out about his control freak thing, Charles responds by being a sanctimonious asshole because it’s not like he ever learns or grows as a person in these movies, you know, and Mystique basically throws her arms up and storms out, which is a good representation for audience reaction at that point. Her parting shot is one of like two good lines in the whole movie:

Mystique: And anyway, as far as I can see, the women saved the day again! Maybe you should think about renaming us X-Women!

The movie will shortly repay her for that, don’t worry.

Some other things happen. Creepy aliens looking for Phoenix Booster covertly invade Earth. Mystique goes to Hank and says, hey so Charles is being a huge dick and a total control freak. I’m kinda fed up with him, maybe it’s time to move out and start living our own life? To which Hank is like, IDK Raven do even have a life outside X-Men, and I don’t want to move out of my lab, and Mystique is like, ugh okay I’ll stay.

Jean gets upset at the party and pushes some people over in midst of Phoenix breakdown, which makes everyone panic. Charles notices that her power is now OVER 9000 and he can’t just go and fuck around in her mind anymore, so the logical solution is to use Cerebro to do that anyway.

It turns out that Phoenix thing not only amplified Jean’s power, it also dissolved mental blocks Charles put in her mind to hide a terrible truth from her: her father survived the car crash. In fact, with her powers, she can find her father right now! Jean, in midst of her generic emotional crisis, blows out of the school to do exactly that, because she feels alone and misunderstood and betrayed, man.

It turns out he willingly gave her up and I guess hates her because she caused the accident by putting her mother to sleep while driving. Jean is pretty upset and about to smite the whole neighbourhood, when the X-Men arrive.

This is how X-Men discreetly take care of their business: They suit up in their official uniforms and take their official super-advanced jet and land it on the street, so everyone around will know what’s up. The only thing they were missing while confronting Jean was the transparent with the word INTERVENTION.

Jean freaks out, X-Men try to fight her, they all cause maximum collateral damage possible, there’s police, Mystique tries to talk Jean down, Jean semi-accidentally kills Mystique by pushing her over and impaling her on some wooden debris.

It’s all very badly written and feels utterly cheap and is a total waste of character. Frankly, the scene made me angry and not much else. But since the whole movie revolves on the fact that everyone is an idiot, Mystique didn’t go there anyway, I guess.

Anyway, it furthers three things:

Plot A, Charles is reaching new heights of being a huge dick wherein he goes to sprout platitudes at Hank, who predictably doesn’t want to listen to him and lashes out, to which Charles reacts very maturely by being OFFENDED, because Raven was HIS sister, OBVIOUSLY he’s the MOST injured party here! (No, seriously, he pretty much says that).

Plot B, Hank needs to be a bigger idiot, to which we will come back in a moment.

Plot C, Jean Grey is now Public Enemy Number One and all people are back to hating humans! The President literally stopped taking Xavier’s calls, people want to arrest X-Men for property damage, neutralize their powers and stick them in prison for mutants.

Oh, and aliens are tracking Jean to get the Phoenix Power or whatever.

Jeans next move is to go visit Erik Lehnsherr, who is living like a hobo in Genosha with a handful of like-minded mutants. She wants to ask him for life advice, I guess, because when Charles Xavier is being a huge dick and hiding your memories of your childhood trauma from you without your consent, Magneto is the only alternative.

Too bad she wants advice on Not Killing People With My Powers When I’m Kinda Upset With Them. It’s unsurprising that Erik Lehnsherr, who spend his whole life Deliberately Killing People With His Powers Because He Was Very Upset With Them, can’t really relate.

This upsets Jean further, and she demonstrates that by attacking US soldiers who came to Genosha to arrest them and doing her best to kill them. Then she flies off to drink in a bar, where an alien picks her up, because it wants to show her the whole wide world or something.

Let’s come back to plot B for a moment, which is Hank being an idiot. Hank is very distraught and wants to kill Jean. So Hank goes to Magneto.

Hank: I want to kill Jean and I need your help with that.

Erik: Wait, what? Why?

Hank: She killed Mystique!

Erik, already frothing at the mouth: ...let me grab my I’m Being A Huge Idiot Helmet, Hank, and we can commence the business of killing.

So the aliens are pitching their “Let’s Re-Create The Earth In Your Image” campaign to Jean, which can be done only in a New York townhouse, specifically in a very special bedroom (...oh hey, I didn’t pick up on that creepy vibe until now!).

Jean is largely convinced, because in this movie characters just go back and forth as the plot demans.

So both Charles and Erik with their lackeys track down Jean, and have a huge fight in front of the above-mentioned townhouse, with lots and lots of collateral damage while they debate who is right. Before that, Erik has the second good line in the movie, which is used to rightfully call out Charles:

Erik: You’re always sorry and there’s always a speech. But no one wants to listen anymore.

Anyway, X-Men and the mutants beat up each other, Erik gets into the house and fails to kill Jean, then Charles gets in the house and tries to talk down Jean, which is followed by perhaps the most genuinely disquieting scene in the movie, in which Jean uses her telekinesis to destroy the wheelchair and force Charles to walk up the stairs.

They have an exchange that is supposed to be hopeful and heartwarming and so on, but by this point I’m fed up with this world movie.

Jean rejects the aliens’ campaign, so the alien head honcho attempts to suck out the Phoenix Dust out of her, and partially succeeds, but is interrupted midway and knocked out. All the mutants are arrested, put into special shackles restricting their powers and put on a train which is going straight to special prison for mutants.

Don’t worry, we’re in the last stretch.

Aliens need the rest of Phoenix Macguffin, so they ambush the train. There’s a big action scene, everyone is fighting the aliens, there are a few cool shots but beyond that I’m blanking. In the end Jean awakens, wipes the floor with the aliens, and when the alien head honcho tries to emotionally blackmail her into not eviscerating its hide, she grabs it, flies up into the sky and explodes them both.

Much sad. Very sacrifice. Such tears etc etc etc.

AN EPILOGUE, FINALLY

The situation returns to the status quo, except some people are dead.

The humans were about to lock up mutants in a prison like five minutes earlier, but nobody mentions that. Guess everyone forgot about that.

As far as I can tell, nobody except X-Men noticed that Earth was about to be invaded by aliens.

The school is renamed after Jean Grey.

Hank is the new headmaster. On his desk, a cheesy nostalgic photo of Mystique.

Charles, despite seemingly getting a pass on his dickishness on every turn in this narrative, is Worn Down By His Losses and retires. He occupies his time by brooding morosely at a cafe in unspecified European-looking country.

Erik finds him there. He is disproportionately cheery, like a man who after decades of pining finally is in a place where he can bully his longtime crush into a reluctant chess date, which he proceeds to do.

Camera pans up, to the sky. The sky gives us Phoenix Force-shaped wink.

THE END

#x men #xmdp #dark phoenix #review #spoilers #nebra original #my stuff #charles xavier is a huge dick the movie #jean grey #charles xavier #erik lehnsherr #mystique deserved better

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per-ineptia-ad-astra · 5 years

Text

Star Trek Episode 1.12: The Menagerie, Part 2

AKA: Talosian Boogaloo

Our episode begins with a recap of what happened last episode: Spock gone rogue, the Enterprise heading to Talos 4, mysterious transmissions, etc, etc. After the titles, we’re back in the hearing room, where they’ve re-convened Spock’s trial, although they’ve now pared down the participants to just Kirk, Mendez, Pike and Spock. Everyone else who was there for the first part is just going to be left on a cliffhanger. Mendez reiterates that viewing transmissions from Talos 4 is strictly against Starfleet policy, but Spock tells him that the screen is now being remotely controlled and the transmissions are just going to keep coming anyway, so they have no choice but to view them. Although they could try leaving the room so they don’t have to look at the screen. Just a thought.

After Spock gives them a Previously On My Court Martial, the screen comes on again, and we see Pike waking up on a bed in some kind of strange cell. The walls are made of stone bricks but it appears to have been built into a cave, and beyond the transparent front wall of the cell a long rocky corridor stretches forth. Pike wastes very little time in attempting to bash the wall in shoulder-first, but it absorbs the impact with only a slight wobble.

Before he can make any further effort, a door slides open nearby and a quartet of Brainheads—the Talosians, presumably--appear and approach Pike’s cell. Pike starts talking to them, introducing himself as Christopher Pike, commander of the space vehicle Enterprise. Yes, that’s what he said, space vehicle. Well it’s not technically wrong, I guess.

Pike tells them his crew has come in peace, and demands to know if they can understand him. Instead of replying to him, one Talosian starts talking--telepathically--to another as if Pike can’t even hear them, which is the most annoying thing, I hate it when people do that. Specifically, he (...she? they? zie? I have no idea) remarks that “the specimen’s intelligence appears to be shockingly limited.” Wow. Rude. The Talosian leader, referred to as Magistrate, responds that this isn’t surprising since it was so easy to bait the ship here in the first place, and that they can read in Pike’s thoughts that he’s only just now starting to figure out that the encampment was an illusion. They continue to stand around making smug comments about how primitive Pike is while he tries to talk to them. But despite how primitive they find him, he seems to be more adaptable than their other specimens, so they’re ready to start “the experiment.”

Back on the Enterprise, a small group of officers, including Spock, Boyce, Number One, and a red-haired chap who was with the landing party, have convened to discuss just what they’re going to do about the captainnapping. Currently Spock is giving a presentation, in which he hypothesizes that the inhabitants of the planet live underground and manufacture all their living needs down there, because the surface of the planet doesn’t have enough vegetation or animal life to support any kind of civilization. So, as they too have now worked out, the survivors were an illusion all along. A perfect illusion, Boyce bemoans, down to every detail. Well, I don’t know about that, Boyce. I mean one of them was wearing makeup. That really should have been a tip-off.

But the danger is clear to them now. The Talosians can create illusions out of people’s own thoughts, ones that seem completely real to them in every way. That’s going to make it pretty difficult to go up against them. Spock warns that if they attract the Talosians’ attention they might find that their psychic powers are strong enough to easily kill them all. But, as Redhair points out, they can’t just leave Pike down there for the Talosians to have their way with him. Since their hand phasers didn’t bring down the door, he suggests they use the ship’s own power against it, which he says is powerful enough to “blast half a continent.” One would hope he’s exaggerating because if the ship can do that they might bring down the door, alright, but they’d probably be killing Pike and everyone else down there along with it. There’s a reason the usual response to a hostage situation is not to nuke the entire building.

Number One agrees to this plan, though, so the group disperses to go set to work. Back down in the caves, one of the Talosians is reporting to the Magistrate that they’re all hard at work probing Pike’s mind—just his mind, thankfully—and they’ve found excellent memory capacity. The Magistrate notes that Pike has a recent memory of having to fight to save his own life, which they’re going to use now, but give him “something more interesting to protect.” In his cell, Pike is examining the walls for weakness when his surroundings suddenly shift, and he finds himself on a planet surface, looking up at a pink and purple sky with a giant moon hanging on the horizon. Dominating this vista is a large castle beside a waterfront. As Pike stands there going wtf, a woman runs up to him, saying that they must hurry and hide themselves. Pike protests that he was in a cell just a minute ago and now he’s back on Rigel 7 and what’s that about? He reckons that means this is all another illusion pulled out of his memories. This is all happening as it happened back on the real Rigel 7, down to the unseen growling thing that seems to be approaching—except for the woman. She’s new.

As Pike and the mystery woman run towards the castle for cover, we pull back to the present, where Spock comments that this was “a brilliant deduction by Captain Pike.” Well, I don’t know if I would go that far. Once you’ve learned that the telepathic aliens who’ve captured you can create perfect illusions, and you find yourself suddenly in an impossible reconstruction of your own memory, it’s not a big leap to figure out that the telepathic aliens probably did it. Spock goes on to explain, just in case anyone hasn’t realized it yet, that the Talosians could indeed create any illusory world they wanted for Pike, and that even knowing they were illusions would not make him experience them any less vividly.

On the screen, Pike has figured out that the mystery woman is in fact Vina, just with longer hair and a new dress. He finds this quite odd, but doesn’t get the chance to interrogate her at length because the growling thing has found them. It turns out to actually just be a dude in standard barbarian getup, with a shield and a spiky handaxe. Who is growling.

Vina urges Pike to attack the miniboss over there while he can still swing a surprise round. Pike protests that this isn’t real, but Vina says he has to kill the guy just like he did before. This might all be an illusion but Pike is still gonna feel it just the same if he gets an axe through his chest.

After stomping around a bit, Mr. Snarly finally catches sight of Pike, so any possibility of Pike getting a sneak attack is now gone. Instead he shoves Vina out of the line of fire—the line of axe, if you will—and picks up a nearby mace and shield that’s just laying around. The two have at it, swinging weapons around like two people not used to swinging weapons around.

[Image description: A set of stone stairs between an archway leading up to a balcony. A man in heavy furs and a helmet, carrying a shield, is advancing on Pike, who is crouched on the stairs holding him off with a spear. Behind Pike a woman in a white dress with long blonde hair is cowering.]

A Pike holding a pike.

Eventually Mr. Snarly chases Pike and Vina up onto a nearby balcony. Pike gets pushed off, leaving Vina in the clutches of Mr. Snarly. In desperation, Pike picks up a nearby dagger and throws it at Mr. Snarly, somehow scoring a perfect hit and impaling the guy in the lower back despite all the thick fur in the way. That’s quite implausible impressive, though it doesn’t kill Mr. Snarly. It does attract his attention, though, as a dagger in your back is prone to do, and he proceeds to jump off the balcony to get at Pike—and lands right on top of a big vicious barbed thing that Pike holds up just in time. And that’s the end of Mr. Snarly. 500 XP for Pike!

The scene then dissolves and suddenly they’re back in the cell—both Pike and Vina, though now she has short hair and a shimmery silver dress. She promptly throws herself onto Pike, but then draws back as she realizes they’re being watched by the Talosians, who turn and exit back into the elevator without a word. Creeps.

Back in the present, the hearing room screen suddenly goes blank all by itself, to the surprise of Kirk and Mendez. Spock says this is because the Talosians know that Pike is getting worn out, and sure enough, the guy is asleep with his head slumped forward, thus far the only movement the actor has gotten to perform. The Talosians, Spock says, have a vested interest in Pike getting back alive. He suggests they take a break so everyone can catch a nap. Mendez and Spock have yet another brief bout of verbal arm-wrestling, which predictably goes nowhere. So they take a recess and come back after the break.

As everyone heads back into the room, Kirk’s voiceover informs us that they’re now only an hour out from Talos 4. Luckily for them Captain Pike’s gripping adventures fit remarkably well into a television episode format, so they should have plenty of time to finish watching before they get there.

On the screen, Pike is questioning Vina, asking what her whole deal is. She says she’s there to please him (gross), and when asked if she’s real she says she’s “real as you wish.” Pike calls that one out as the vague non-answer that it is, but Vina’s not any more forthcoming. He guesses that she’s there to get a reaction out of him for the sake of whatever this whole experiment is. While Pike muses out-loud on this, Vina tells him that he can live out any dream or fantasy he wants, and that she can be any woman he’s ever wanted. Vina. Vina, you’re creeping me out here. Please stop.

Mercifully for all of us, Pike is currently less interested in living out sex fantasies and more interested in not being caged up and experimented on by a bunch of psychic jerks, so he tells Vina that the best way for her to please him is to give him some information about how he can fight back against the Talosians. She won’t, though, only saying that he’s a fool, so Pike goes “well you’re not real anyway, nyah” and stalks off. But only about two feet away, there’s not much room to stalk in there.

Up on the planet surface, the Enterprise crew have brought up a seriously big laser and aimed it at the door. They start the countdown and then all run off and hide behind some rocks to watch the show. It’s an impressive show, including a lot of eye-watering flashing lights, but no matter how high they crank up the power, the door won’t budge. Eventually they have to shut it off, leaving them with no sign that anything happened at all, despite all reasonable expectations. But as Boyce points out, they can’t actually be sure of that—the Talosians’ psychic powers are so OP, they could have actually blasted that whole hill to kingdom come and they just can’t tell. Well, that was a productive use of time.

Back in the cell, Vina, evidently tired of being ignored, finally says that maybe she could answer some questions for Pike. But only if he’ll pick a fantasy for them to live out together. Pike is only willing to go as far as “perhaps” but that’s good enough for her. So he asks just how much the Talosians can control people. Vina says they can’t actually force him to do anything, only trick him using the illusions, and punish him if he doesn’t cooperate. They’re not completely all-powerful, then—good to know. As any good gamer knows, if it’s got a weakness, you can find a way to kill it.

When asked, Vina gives some backstory on the Talosians. Evidently they used to live up on the surface many millennia ago, but there was a great war that wrecked the planet so badly it’s only just starting to become able to support life again. The Talosians that managed to escape underground found that living in caves forever is really boring, so they worked on developing their psychic powers to compensate. As Vina explains, though, this was their downfall (well, their second downfall). Once their powers got so great that they could start living out any fantasy they wanted, they stopped doing anything else. Stopped building, expanding, creating, or maintaining their own society. Just sat around all day, dreaming up fake lives. Kind of like having the internet, but even worse.

Having specimens like Pike around is really great for the Talosians, Vina explains, because when they create illusions for him to live out they get to live vicariously through him, feeling his emotions and seeing new experiences. That’s why they’ve got a whole zoo down here, brought back from all over the galaxy. She doesn’t explain how they were brought back. The Talosians seem either unable or unwilling to leave the planet, so did they just have to lure all of their specimens to them? That would indicate that all of those specimens are actually from species advanced enough to have space travel, yet the presence of any other sapient species in the zoo is never mentioned. This would seem to lead to one of two conclusions: either there are other sapient species in the zoo and Pike and Vina just don’t care enough to give them any thought, or the Talosians got really lucky and managed to lure Space Noah’s Ark over to them.

If the Talosians have been keeping all these specimens around for years, Pike works out, they must have been doing what zoos usually do with their animals—breeding them. That indicates they intend to breed them some humans, too. They’ve now got a male specimen, so where are they going to find the female one? Vina protests that Pike made a deal with her about this question-asking business, but Pike says he doesn’t have to hold up a deal with a person who doesn’t exist anyway. Vina tells him that actually she is real, as real and human as him. They’re like Adam and Eve, she says. Oh boy.

Before she can elaborate on that, though, Vina starts writhing around and screaming in pain, begging not to be punished. Then she vanishes, leaving nothing but an empty dress behind. Pike turns to see the Magistrate, who’s been watching them for a while now, and who promptly skedaddles back into the elevator. But like, in a smug way.

Back in the hearing room, Mendez asks Pike if this means he was captured as breeding stock, just in case anyone in the audience doesn’t know who Adam and Eve are. Kirk questions why, was it just to maintain their zoo? Spock says there was much more going on. Then we go back to the footage. Thanks guys, really needed that little break there, very vital for the ongoing plot.

Pike has gone back to leaning on the walls in the hopes of finding a weak spot, when he sees that a glass of blue liquid has come through a panel. He tries to break through the panel, but he’s far too late and it’s now shut securely again. Nothing left to do but check out that glass. The Magistrate, who’s come back again, tells Pike that the liquid is a nourishing protein complex, good for when you’re working out a lot. And they actually say this with their mouth, the first time any of the Talosians have deigned to communicate verbally.

The Magistrate says that if Pike doesn’t find the protein complex appetizing, it can appear to be any kind of food he wants. What if, Pike asks, what he wants is to go on a hunger strike instead? The Magistrate replies that if Pike doesn’t cooperate he can be punished. Seconds later, Pike is writhing about in a landscape of flame and boiling mud, screaming dramatically. Then, just as quickly, he’s back in the cell. The Magistrate says they drew this experience from a fable Pike heard in childhood. I presume they’re talking about Hell, but really it could be a lot of things. Muspelheim, for example.

So if Pike doesn’t do what he’s told he’ll be put in time-out in Hell, which is pretty bad. But he wonders, why not just make him feel irresistibly hungry? The Magistrate doesn’t answer, but Pike works it out himself: that’s not within their power. They can construct imaginary environments that provide certain kinds of stimulus, but it seems that directly forcing people to feel specific sensations is a no-go. But the Magistrate warns that if Pike doesn’t drink his supper they can draw even worse punishments from his mind, so reluctantly he downs the contents of the glass. Then he gets up and abruptly makes a charge for the front of the cell, causing the Magistrate to briefly step back in alarm.

What follows is two completely separate conversations happening at once. Pike is focused on the Magistrate’s reaction. In that moment, he says, he was only thinking about how much he wanted to hurt the Magistrate, which makes him wonder if the Talosians can’t read through ‘primitive thoughts.’ Meanwhile the Magistrate, stubbornly ignoring everything Pike is saying, tells him that a human ship really did crash on the planet, but in reality there was only one survivor, badly injured. They fixed her up, found her ‘interesting,’ and decided they would need to attract a mate.

Pike finally caves to the subject and notes that the Talosians seem to be trying to make Pike feel protective and caring towards Vina. The Magistrate says this is necessary for propagation of the species. So apparently, despite how advanced the Talosians would like us to think they are, the only way they can get a baby out of a couple of humans is to get them to physically have sex with each other. I mean, we don’t even have to do that anymore. On that note, the Talosians got really lucky that both of their ‘specimens’ turned out to be cis and straight, and evidently still in full possession of all baby-making capabilities. Imagine how gloriously Pike could derail this whole stupid thing just by saying, “Sorry guys, got something to tell you...” My enjoyment of this episode would skyrocket.

The Magistrate says they only want Pike to fall in love with Vina because they want their specimens to be happy. Pike immediately dismisses that as a lie, which seems fair, since so far the Talosians’ attempts to make Pike ‘happy’ have involved sticking him in a ten by ten room with a single hard bench, constantly threatening to punish him horribly if he steps out of line, occasionally providing him with a single mouthful of liquid for sustenance, and standing right outside loudly insulting him for kicks. You guys would never get AZA accredited at this rate.

So Pike naturally enough assumes they have ulterior motives. He thinks that maybe they’re trying to get him to genuinely bond with Vina so they can establish a family group, maybe leading up to a whole community. Hopefully they’re planning to get some more specimens in the mix there or that human community is gonna face some serious problems. On his way out, the Magistrate says that Vina has been properly ‘conditioned,’ which enrages Pike, who says that if they’re going to punish anyone they should punish him because he’s the one not cooperating. The Magistrate smugly notes that Pike is feeling protectiveness and, now, sympathy, which is just what they want. Then they swan off again.

I don’t know if I would consider getting a human to feel sympathy and protectiveness to be much of an accomplishment though, to be honest. I mean, humans can feel sympathy and protectiveness towards animals, plants, inanimate objects, fictional characters, Animal Crossing villagers...it doesn’t take a masterwork of manipulation, is what I’m saying.

Pike stands there glaring after the Magistrate, but a moment later the cell fades out and he suddenly finds himself in a soundstage with some trees on it—sorry, I meant, some beautiful and verdant parkland, of course. Nearby is Vina with a blanket and picnic basket, and also, a couple horses. Pike recognizes the horses as his, the ones he was telling Boyce about back in Part I, and takes a minute to happily pet one and feed him some sugar cubes. Pike’s held out in the face of being offered any kind of wild fantasy he wishes, refusing to buy into any illusion he’s been given, but getting to see his beloved pets, now, that’ll make him immediately give in a little. Which I consider to be easily the most realistic moment in this entire story. If you wanted me to buy into an illusory world, putting my cat in it would probably be your best bet.

This all seems to be a scene from home for Pike, home in the most ideal possible sense, and Vina tells him he can stay there. Pike protests that neither of them are really there, that they’re being held in a cage, a menagerie—two for one title drop there, woo! But Vina reacts very badly to any mention that this is all an illusion. Pike keeps trying to get information out of her while she sits there begging for him to just go along with it.

Eventually Vina says that it’s true the Talosians can’t read through primitive emotions like hate. I’m not sure why hate is a more primitive emotion than anything else. I could understand how any strong enough emotion could overwhelm sensitive telepathy, but no, it’s just hate, I guess. Personally I think hate is kind of an advanced emotion. I mean, do you think animals feel hate? I don’t think so. I think it’s something we invented.

Problem is, Vina says, it’s impossible to keep that hate going for long enough to really do anything. “I’ve tried,” she says. “They keep at you and at you, year after year, tricking and punishing. And they’ve won. They own me.”

Keep in mind that if Vina was really a survivor of that crash, that means she’s been here for eighteen years. Eighteen years alone with no contact except for figments of her imagination and some aliens that view her as nothing more than a primitive animal. Eighteen years of being held captive by beings that can make someone live through the most nightmarish scenarios they could possibly imagine as punishment for any transgression. Eighteen years of constant psychological manipulation and torture. Pike’s frustration with her unwillingness to help is understandable but it’s hardly any wonder that Vina just wants him to cooperate so that the hell she lives in, that she’s given up any chance of ever getting out of, could now at least become a little more bearable. We only get a glimpse of what that hell must have been like for her, but that glimpse is absolutely horrific.

Pike comforts her, because you’d have to be pretty damn hard-hearted to not react to that little speech, but Vina says he doesn’t fully realize what’s going on. She says that the Talosians picked Pike specifically because they read her mind to know what her idea of the perfect man would be. In other words, he was hand-picked to be someone she couldn’t help but fall in love with. Really, they searched her mind for the ideal man and came up with this dude? Vina. Vina, honey, I don’t mean to judge, but you could do so much better.

While the Talosians watch from their cave monitor, because they’re skeevy bastards, Pike says that he’s been attracted to Vina as well from the moment he first saw her in the camp. When you thought she was eighteen, ya creep. He says she was like “a wild little animal.” Pike...Pike, I don’t know where you learned to compliment women but you clearly need to go back and take the course again.

Vina says that she thinks she knows now why Pike hasn’t been brought in by any of the illusions; they’re all things that he’s experienced and is familiar with. A person’s wildest dreams, she says, are about things that they can’t have. Pike being a starship captain means he always has to be formal and honorable, so he must be yearning to cut loose. Wow, thanks for giving the Talosians free tips on how to psychologically manipulate humans, Vina.

Sure enough, the Talosians promptly change the idyllic scene, and Pike finds himself dressed in ornate clothing and sitting by a poolside while Vina—now appearing as an Orion woman with green skin and dark hair—dances with the accompaniment of a few guys playing music that I can only describe as ‘stereotypically exotic’. And that really is the same actress, Susan Oliver, who had a long career as an actor, director, and aviator, but mostly now gets remembered for a few minutes of dancing around with green paint on.

(A fun fact about this scene is that they had to experiment a lot to get the green makeup right, but when the film first came back from editing, the green was barely visible. So they tried another makeup, but that didn’t show up any better. This went on for a while before they found out that the guy in the film lab had been assuming that the green color was a mistake that they would want corrected, and had been hard at work undoing the makeup artist’s hard work. That’s the only fun thing I can come up with about this scene, though.)

Apparently Pike’s wildest fantasies also include a bowl of fruit and a couple of incredibly sleazy guys sitting next to him just to round things out. Luckily for him, all this is being observed not just by a bunch of smug jerk aliens, but also by the court martial attendees watching it on the screen in the present, while he sits there unable to leave or say anything or even turn around. And yes, the scene cuts back to the present, just in case anyone might have forgotten about that. Kirk even asks Pike to confirm that that is Vina as the Orion slave girl, for no reason I can think of except to just embarrass him. Mendez muses that “[Orion women] are like animals—vicious, seductive. They say no human male can resist them.”

Excuse me, I need to just step away from my computer for a moment.

[distant sounds of a head banging against a wall]

Okay, I’m back. Where were we? Oh, right. This.

The sexy dancing goes on for longer than is frankly necessary—although really, any amount of time at all would be longer than is necessary—while Pike sits there vibrating in place before he can’t stand it anymore and flees through a nearby door. Beyond is a series of, guess what, more caves. As Pike looks around for an exit he finds that the way back is now gone, nothing more than a solid stone wall. And then Vina, still in green, appears behind him, holding a torch.

What happens next is left to the imagination—probably for the best there—as we then finally return to the Enterprise, where a landing party is assembling. Number One and Spock give the rest a grim briefing: they’re hoping to beam down to the inside of the Talosians’ base, but there’s always the possibility that the Talosians could manipulate what the transporter officer sees and cause people to be beamed inside solid rock. Gee, the transporter sure is fun. Number One says that, given that lovely possibility, anyone is free to back out now without judgment, but no one does. No one ever does when someone gives that ultimatum, come to think of it.

So they all get on the transporter and prepare to head off, but when the switch is hit, only two of the six people actually go anywhere: Number One and a red-haired female crewman who’s been around but hasn’t been named yet. Or, as Spock hilariously declares rather loudly, “THE WOMEN!”

The transporter operators fumble desperately with the controls, but to no avail: the women are, indeed, gone. Specifically, they’ve gone to Pike’s cell. The inside of his cell, unfortunately. Pike is evidently still inside the illusion doing I-don’t-want-to-know-what with Vina because he’s just standing there staring into space while Vina has her hands on his shoulders. Upon seeing the new arrivals she screams, “No! Let me finish!” and storms away.

While Vina sulks and the other two women realize that no one else got transported with them, Pike re-enters reality, and promptly tears open the redhead’s landing jacket. No worries, though: what he’s after is the phaser she’s carrying. He takes Number One’s, too, but to his frustration neither phaser seems to be working. Neither is Number One’s communicator.

So Pike adopts a new strategy. He stands over by the panel where the food-drink came out, drops the phasers in front of it, and begins loudly talking about how he’s imagining beating up the Talosians, filling his mind with that most primitive of emotions, hate. Meanwhile, Vina moves on to picking on the other women, sneering about how the redhead is “a fine choice for intelligent offspring” and that “they’d have more luck crossing him with a computer” than Number One, who somehow has already figured out that the Talosians are trying to breed humans from Pike. Number One fires back that Vina was an adult crewman on the crashed ship eighteen years ago, meaning she should not be looking quite so young and sprightly anymore. Yeah, you really get a sense that Number One is logical, emotionless and detached, by how her response to one half-baked insult is to immediately go, “Oh yeah, well you’re OLD.”

The whole argument is derailed when the Magistrate comes back to tell Pike that since he’s been resisting Vina, they’ve brought him two more women to choose from. Great. Lovely. Look, I, uh...I don’t really want to examine the practicality of breeding humans too much, y’know, but...I don’t understand why the Talosians are so focused on Pike and only Pike here. When they only had one human on hand, and wanted a lot more humans, trying to get more humans out of that first human makes...sense, I guess. But now there’s a whole ship up there of some four hundred humans (and one half-human), and they’re completely ignoring all of them except Pike and two women that they only brought down to entice Pike some more. Sure, they’ve decided Pike is the ‘prime specimen’ or whatever, but he’s only one guy. If you want to build a whole community, you’re going to need a lot more genetic diversity—not to mention the additional skillsets offered by the rest of the Enterprise crew, that the Talosians themselves clearly don’t have, and the fact that having so many more extra specimens means your whole plan isn’t ruined if one of them dies or is infertile or refuses to get with the program. This plot is obviously incredibly ethically wrong, but it’s also just incredibly stupid on a practical level.

The Magistrate proceeds to inform Pike that both women have qualities in their favor: Number One is really smart, and the redhead is young and strong. Also apparently she’s been crushing on Pike for some time but considered him unreachable and is now realizing that that’s changed. Sure, because any woman’s first thought upon suddenly being imprisoned to use as breeding stock would be “oh cool, I get to screw the captain now.” That’s ever so realistic.

Pike is still yelling at the Magistrate about all his hateful thoughts, but the Magistrate puts a stop to it by giving him some kind of mental punishment, presumably another trip to hell. They smugly tell the assembled captives that wrong thinking will be punished and right thinking will be rewarded. Then they flounce away.

Sometime later, everyone’s sitting around looking glum—or taking a nap, in Vina’s case—when Pike sees the panel in the wall start to slide open. The Magistrate is making a grab for the phasers Pike dropped there earlier. But this time Pike is ready. He pounces on the guy, hauling them out into the cell, pinning them to the floor, and grabbing them by the throat. The Magistrate responds by making themself appear to be some kind of big hairy thing with tusks, but Pike is undeterred and hangs on, threatening the Magistrate into dropping the illusion. So then the Magistrate says that if Pike doesn’t release them they’ll destroy the Enterprise. Vina says they can do it, by tricking the crew into working the wrong controls, but Pike thinks they won’t.

He tries the phasers again, but they still don’t seem to be working. So he turns the phaser on the Magistrate. He’s guessing that the phaser did work and the Magistrate just illusion’d over it, but they’re probably not going to be able to do the same thing if Pike shoots them in the head. The Magistrate gives in and, sure enough, a big hole suddenly appears in the front wall of the cell. Well, fancy that.

Everyone makes their way out of the hole, Pike hauling along the Magistrate with a phaser still pointed at their head. Back in the present, the screen goes off on its own. Spock, for the first time during all this, seems unsure and worried, especially when Mendez comments that “it seems the Talosians have deserted you.” He asks them to just wait a moment, but the screen still remains white. I feel for him. It sucks when you’re trying to give a presentation but the projector’s just not cooperating.

Mendez asks Pike for his verdict, but Spock begs his former captain to signal for a wait instead, telling him it’s a chance for his life on the line. Kirk questions what Spock means, exactly, by all this ‘chance for life’ business, since all that we’ve seen indicates that ‘life’ with the Talosians means being kept caged and treated like a zoo animal performing for amusement. You know, Kirk, that’s a mighty good point. We’ll get back to that later.

Spock insists there’s more to it and tells him to watch, but there’s nothing to watch. It sure is a pity Spock has completely lost his ability to explain anything himself and can only rely on the screen to do it for him. Tragic.

With no more footage forthcoming, Mendez pushes again for a verdict, and Pike votes with a single long beep: guilty. Mendez himself votes guilty as well. Attention turns to Kirk, although with two guilty votes it doesn’t much matter what he says now. Still, there’s quite the dramatic chord when he votes guilty as well. Although it’d be pretty hard to not vote that Spock was guilty right now. I mean, he put in a guilty plea. They know he did indeed take the ship to Talos 4 because they’re on the ship and it’s going there right now. Spock may (or may not, it’s debatable) have good reasons for doing what he’s doing, but it’d be kind of ludicrous to call him innocent of the charges.

After the break, the bridge calls in to say that they’re entering orbit around Talos 4. Spock says that the Talosians are controlling the ship like they did thirteen years ago. Uh. The Talosians didn’t control the ship thirteen years ago, though, did they? They tricked the people who did control the ship into going there, but there was never an indication that they could actually control the ship directly. You might say they were just controlling it via illusions again, except they can’t do that because no one is actually flying the ship right now. It’s still computer controlled. So what’s going on here, Spock?

Spock’s not forthcoming about this but he says they’ll see the answer as to why right now. And sure enough, the screen comes back on. Man, all that drama about whether the record would keep playing, and voting Spock guilty or not, that sure led up to something, didn’t it. Here they are, all still in the room. Watching the screen. Why did it go off in the first place? Nobody knows.

On the screen, Pike and co take the elevator back up to the surface, where it turns out that the giant laser cannon actually did blow the door clean off, and took out a bunch of the surrounding rock, too—the Talosians just put an illusion over it.

Pike orders Number One to contact the ship, but it seems she can’t. The Magistrate gloats that their escape attempt was futile and actually they wanted the prisoners to get up to the surface. Oh, fuck off. If they wanted the humans on the surface, they could have taken them to the surface at any time. There was no need for an elaborate charade of pretending to be taken prisoner. This punk just got their ass handed to them and is too terminally smug to admit it. “Yeah, this was our plan! We wanted you to do this all along!” Bullshit.

Anyway, the Magistrate says it’s time for the reclaiming of the planet surface to begin, once Pike chooses a lady. Pike says that he’ll stay with Vina if the Talosians at least send Number One and the redhead back. Number One then drops this stunning line.

[Image Description: Number One, a white woman with long dark hair wearing a blue landing party jacket over a gold uniform shirt, saying, “It’s wrong to create a race of humans to live as slaves.”]

REALLY, IS IT? I NEVER WOULD HAVE GUESSED. Man, Star Trek really coming in with the hard-hitting moral lessons here. So cerebral! I’m in awe.

To prove her point, Number One has set her phaser to start overloading, which will kill all of them. The Magistrate is, for once, quite thrown by this sudden determination to die rather than live in captivity. Pike tells Vina and the Magistrate that they still have time to get back underground before the phaser goes off, but Vina says that if they all really find it this important, she’s staying with them. After all if the Talosians have any human beings left they’ll probably just keep trying this whole thing all over again. And poor Vina may well be thinking now that going out in a phaser overload is preferable to more time as a captive under such awful circumstances.

Before anyone can get vaporized, though, a couple more Talosians come up in the elevator. Apparently they’ve got some information from the Enterprise records that they’re here to deliver to the Magistrate telepathically, though not before getting in yet another dig about how crude the humans are. The Magistrate is stunned at this new information: that humans have such a hatred for captivity that they’ll choose death instead, no matter how pleasant the captivity is. Yeah, we really hate captivity. Not so much, of course, that we won’t subject lots of other humans to it if it’s convenient for us, but, y’know.

At any rate, from this information (wherever they got it from—was there just a subheading in the Enterprise archives about How Much We Hate Captivity, Boy We Really Do?), the Talosians figure that using humans for their slave race is never going to work because they’re just too violent and rebellious. Since the humans are no use, the Talosians are going to let them go. Oh. Well okay then.

Pike is annoyed that they’re not even getting a “sorry we kidnapped and tried to enslave you” or anything, but one of the Talosians points out that without a slave race, the Talosians are condemned to die, so Pike should be happy with that. Oh sure, blame it on the humans. You were the ones who got yourselves into the situation where you needed a slave race to survive. You have only yourselves to blame.

But apparently humans were the Talosians’ best shot, as they were unable to find any other species adaptable enough for the purpose. Pike wonders if there might be, y’know, some middle ground between survival by slave race and extinction—trading, perhaps—but the Magistrate says that humans would eventually pick up the Talosians’ illusion powers and destroy themselves too. That’s a remarkably confident prediction. How do they know humans are even capable of developing that power, or that they would react in the same way to having it?

Oh, never mind. Pike’s done with these idiots and ready to get back to the ship. All eyes then turn to Vina—who says she can’t go.

Up in the transporter room, they’ve suddenly got power again, and the helm is responding once more. Oh, I guess the Talosians did have control over the ship? Since...when? It seems to be enough for them to transport Number One and the redhead back up, at any rate. But not Pike just yet. He’s still down there talking to Vina.

As dramatic music plays, the illusion fades away from Vina, revealing her TRUE FORM: an old woman with a couple scars and a hunch. Hideous.

[Image Description: Vina, an old white woman with stiff pale hair, a scar running across her face and another under the corner of her mouth. She is wearing a shimmery white-gray garment and her right shoulder is hunched up close to her ear.]

Vina says the Talosians found her in the wreckage of the crash, horribly injured, and were able to save her, but because they had never seen a human before they had “no guide to putting [her] back together.” So they were able to figure out human anatomy well enough to restore a dying crash victim to full health, while somehow also not being able to figure it out well enough to make the human look right—even though the Talosians are pretty human-looking themselves and, one would think, would have a decent idea of where all the arms and legs and things go at least. Of course, given that all we can see is Vina’s face and some of the shape of her upper body, it’s rather hard to tell what the Talosians even did that was supposedly so bad. Maybe we’re supposed to imagine the rest of her looks like a Necromorph, but as it is, you’ll forgive me for not dropping my jaw in horror at an old woman with a hump.

Pike, however, seems to be considerably more squeamish, and stands there gaping like an idiot. The Magistrate tells him that they had to show him that Vina did in fact honestly want to stay behind, but they’ll give her back her “illusion of beauty” and “more.” I mean they psychologically tortured her for eighteen years, but we can probably trust them with her welfare.

So Pike returns to the ship, and when asked if Vina isn’t coming with, he says, “No, and I agreed with her reasons.” Oh, you agreed, did you? Once you saw her “true form” wasn’t attractive to you, you realized it was better for her to stay with the aliens that tortured and enslaved her. God forbid she should walk among humans again. She might drive people mad!

The Enterprise heads out, and in the present, the screen goes white again—presumably that’s really the end this time. Kirk gets up, shares a long look with Spock, then turns to say something to Mendez—but Mendez promptly disappears. An image of the Magistrate then appears on the screen, speaking telepathically.

The Magistrate says that Mendez never left the base—he’s been an illusion ever since the shuttlecraft. Having heard from Spock what strength of will Kirk had, they were afraid that Kirk would regain control of the ship, so they made this illusory court martial to distract him. Well if that was the case, why the frell did Mendez keep trying to end the court martial? You’d think they would want him to be extending it as much as possible instead of constantly saying he wanted it stopped.

Anyway, the Magistrate says Pike is welcome to come stay with them for the rest of his life, where he can live in a virtual world instead of being stuck paralyzed forever. Kirk wants to know why the hell Spock didn’t just explain all this to him, because after all Kirk is always down for breaking Starfleet regulations if the Right Thing To Do is on the line. But Spock says that he wouldn’t have Kirk facing the death penalty too. Uh, he kind of is, though? Because it’s his ship so he’s responsible for everything that happens on it? Did we not go over this? I think we went over this.

At that moment, though, a message comes in from the real Mendez, saying that they received the transmissions from Talos 4 also, and in light of how important Pike has been to the service, they’re going to drop the death penalty thing this one time. And Spock is off the hook. Oh, well, that’s super nice of them. I guess the only thing left to do is ask Pike himself if he wants to go.

Pike says yes, so Spock takes him off to the transporter room. Kirk, left alone in the room, is shown an image of Pike—young, healthy Pike—returning down the elevator hand in hand with Vina. “Captain Pike has an illusion, and you have reality,” the Magistrate says. “May you find your way as pleasant.” And there we end.

There is so much going on here I don’t even know where to start. The ending that Vina gets is, quite honestly, an outrage. It’s presented as an utterly obvious fact that her appearance means that staying behind on Talos 4 is best for her. Did anyone consider that maybe if they brought her back she could be treated by human doctors, who, y’know, generally have seen a human or two in their time and might be able to help her a wee bit more than the clueless aliens? Even if not, even if they could do nothing for her, why the hell shouldn’t she come back? It can’t be that she’s somehow unable to leave, such as from some kind of medical issue that only the Talosians can treat, because she outright says “everything works.” It’s an ending that pretty bluntly says that for a woman, being disfigured is such a horrible fate that it’s better for her to remain a captive of the aliens that imprisoned, tortured, and attempted to breed her to make a race of slaves, than for her to live with other humans. Some enlightened future this is!

It’s a bad enough for a character of any gender, but it’s hard not to see it as being directly related to her being a woman, because we have a male example to directly compare it to: Pike. Pike’s appearance after his accident helps demonstrate his condition but it’s otherwise pretty much incidental. No one ever comments on it. All the focus is on his quality of life--which it should be in that situation, but no one ever talks about Vina’s quality of life. So for Pike to consider going to live in a virtual world with the jerkass aliens he has to be completely paralyzed and barely able to communicate with anyone, but for Vina, well, she doesn’t look nice anymore, so that’s basically just as bad, right?

Not that the whole question of going to live with the jerkass aliens is itself not weird as hell. The idea of choosing the virtual world isn’t so much the problem. I mean, I spend way too much time playing video games to call anyone else out on their decisions in that regard. If this was some neutral situation--a planet or machine that naturally generates these illusions, or that the Enterprise had stumbled upon aliens with this power accidentally, maybe, for Pike or even Vina to choose to live there because they felt their quality of life in the real world was no longer good enough, that would be an understandable decision. But we’re not talking about that. We’re talking about the aliens that kidnapped five people, put them in cages and treated them like zoo animals, tortured them for not obeying, and intended to breed a race of slaves from them. Did everyone just forget that?! Vina outright described being tortured for eighteen years by the Talosians. Why would anyone remotely be okay with the idea of continuing to live with them? Why would you trust that they genuinely had good intentions for Pike and Vina now or that they’ve become definitely reformed in the past thirteen years? Why are we expected to treat this as an unambiguously happy ending?

I acknowledge that there were limitations when it came to writing The Menagerie--they had to work with an existing story which wasn’t written with the later framework in mind. But they didn’t have to frame that story in the way that they did, which, I’ll be honest with you, I did not find that great. It starts out interesting enough, with this whole question of what could possibly be going on with Spock, and what’s so terrible about Talos 4, but once they get to the actual court martial it just peters out. They keep trying to maintain tension in both storylines, but all the drama in the present one falls flat because it’s meaningless. Periodically the screen will stop or Mendez will go “I’ve had enough of this!”--and then nothing happens and everything carries on as it was. Then at the end it turns out Mendez wasn’t real and, despite Talos 4 apparently being SO DANGEROUS that it warranted the only death penalty in the Federation, Starfleet is like “oh okay yeah no it’s fine” and that’s the end of that.

Why not just...I don’t know...present the story as a flashback? Why go to all the trouble of setting up circumstances of letting them view the footage on a screen in a way that’s so weird the characters straight up have to say “hang on this doesn’t make sense” just to get the audience to accept it? Set up a situation where the present day Enterprise crew is dealing with something a little like the Talosians and have Spock go “oh we encountered something like this once” and Kirk go “oh tell me about it” and then at the end Kirk somehow gets an idea of how to deal with the current situation because of that story. Or maybe someone makes contact with Talos 4, maybe they’ve changed their minds and want to ask for help after all, maybe Vina’s changed her mind and wants to go home, but Spock has to relate the story because no one else knows what’s going on. Hell, maybe Spock and Kirk just meet Pike in a bar and he’s like “hey Spock remember those dumb aliens we met that one time!” There’s lots of potential frameworks that would be less overly complicated, and less prone to setting themselves up to an unsatisfactory conclusion, than the one we got.

The Cage was infamously rejected because the executives thought it was “too cerebral.” What, exactly, they thought was cerebral about it is a mystery to me. Was it Pike fighting a snarly guy in a fur hat for five minutes? Was it the bit where a woman in green body paint dances sensually while a lot of men ogle at her? Was it the giant laser? There’s so many amazingly cerebral things in this story, it could have been any of them. But whatever their reasons, I, for one, can only say I am glad that they did reject The Cage and that we got the show that we did instead.

TREK TROPE TALLY: None once again this episode--unsurprisingly since we only saw two main cast members and they just sat in a room the whole time. Next time we’ll be enjoying intrigue and Shakespeare references galore with The Conscience of the King.

#star trek #star trek the original series #star trek season one #1.12 The Menagerie Part 2 #recap tag #star trek TOS recaps #1.12 The Menagerie Part 2 recap

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purrincess-chat · 6 years

Text

Midnight Rose CH1

Hello! Here is the first chapter of my JuleRose story for my fantasy AU! It technically goes along with a few prompts from the JuleRose June calendar, and I will warn you now, this is a sad story (for now anyways), so come chapter 5 don’t expect a happy or even bittersweet ending like A Merman’s Heart. The ending of this one is kind of a wtf moment, but that’ll make sense when we get there. No one dies (who isn’t already established as dead from the beginning), so don’t worry about that, but this story isn’t as cheerful as Within the Garden Walls, okay? I say this with full transparency so no one gets their nose into something they don’t want. You’ve been warned. Proceed with caution.

Read on AO3

Chapter 1

Rose didn’t like to cause trouble.

She was a good girl from a well-off family, and she bore her title with grace and propriety. Of course, this didn’t mean she was stuck up, in fact, she was quite the opposite. Wherever she went she did her best to show everyone kindness and fairness, and as such, she had friends in many different walks of life. Working women, nobles, and even a few peasants for Rose never really saw herself as being above anyone else given the circumstances of her birth, and she sought to treat everyone with respect.

It made her one of the most well-liked bachelorettes in town, and many sought her hand in marriage, though she had yet to find a match that suited her. Most tempting was a prince in a neighboring kingdom, but she was reluctant to leave behind her friends and family, so she had declined him for now. They still wrote each other letters from time to time and remained good friends.

It was a rather bemusing situation that she found herself in with so many men asking for her hand in marriage and yet none of them quite convinced her to take the plunge. How could someone so eligible have such a hard time finding love? She absolutely adored the idea of being with her true love, but the truth of the matter was that she just hadn’t found that person yet, not that she let it get her down. No matter how bleak her love life looked, Rose strived to live every day to the fullest, brightening as many faces as she could with kind words and service. She’d come to know everyone in town quite well this way, and new faces didn’t go unnoticed by her. Which is why when a mysterious new girl moved to town, she was the first to know.

Rose first spotted her in the market picking up some herbs and fish, and after a moment, she realized that it was a face she’d never seen before. It was against her personal code of conduct to allow someone to go ungreeted, so she approached her with a sunny grin.

“Hello,” She said, stepping in front of her as the girl sifted through the fresh sage.

“…” The girl seemed to startle a little upon being addressed, and she mumbled what Rose supposed was a greeting.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you around before. My name is Rose; are you new to town?” She asked, and the girl flicked her gaze around as if looking for an escape route. Coming up empty, she simply nodded, hoping to appease her. “That’s so awesome! Do you need help carrying your groceries home? Which direction do you live in? I’d be happy to walk with you.”

“Ah…” She averted her gaze, covering her mouth with her fingers a little.

Why was she so interested in Juleka’s life? Had she been acting suspiciously? Did she suspect Juleka’s secret? She wasn’t used to people talking to her so much, and she suddenly missed her quiet village back home where most people left her alone in peace. Moving to this town was already risky enough, but Juleka couldn’t stay at her old home any more. The people there had become too wary and had she stayed longer, things could have gotten dangerous.

This girl seemed nice, but Juleka knew that underneath her cheery smile was someone that could never accept her for who she truly was, and when you lived a life like hers, it was better to keep your head down and avoid making connections with people. Doing so would only cause her more trouble in the end, and the last thing she wanted was to be discovered.

“I’ve got it. Thanks,” She said quietly, but Rose didn’t seem to hear her because she took the bag off Juleka’s arm and draped it over her own.

“So tell me about yourself. Where are you from?” Rose continued as Juleka debated just leaving her purchases and making a run for it, but she really needed that lavender for her latest…project as she’d call it.

“It’s a small village. You’ve probably never heard of it,” Juleka replied, attempting to distract herself with shopping to no avail. Rose was quite persistent much to her annoyance.

“I have friends from all over the place just try me,” She insisted with a proud glint in her eye, and Juleka suppressed a sigh knowing that it would be easier to just cooperate until she was satisfied.

“Étoile,” She answered finally, and Rose tapped her chin in thought.

“I think I have heard of it actually,” She said thoughtfully. “Isn’t that the place where they burned a witch coven 15 years ago?”

Juleka felt her blood run cold at the mention of that day, but she hid her fear behind an emotionless mask. She’d learned a long time ago how to conceal her true feelings to save her life, but that day was a particularly sore subject.

“Yeah.” She said flatly, examining a potato and concentrating on remembering the things her brother asked her to pick up. “I don’t really remember it much cause I was just a little kid.”

“It must have been awfully frightening, but I bet you felt safer once they were dead.” Rose shuddered at the thought, and Juleka trailed her thumb over the ring on her finger with a frown.

“I really don’t remember.” She shrugged.

“Oh, I guess it’s for the best then,” Rose pursed her lips but didn’t stay down for long. “Do you need someone to show you around town? I’d be happy to give you a tour!”

“No thank you,” Juleka shook her head and quickly added, “I’m actually staying with my brother who has lived here for a while, so he’s already shown me everything I need.”

“Oh really? That’s awesome! Who’s your brother?” Rose was really beginning to grate on her nerves, but she knew better than to let her temper flare up after what happened last time, so she played along throughout the rest of her market trip until they made it back to her brother’s apartment.

“Hey, you should come to my house for tea some time,” Rose offered, handing the rest of the bags off to Juleka.

“Uh, I’ll probably be busy for a while, settling in and whatnot,” She said just wanting this interaction to be over.

“Oh, right.” Rose winced, knotting bits of her dress in her fist. “Well, don’t be a stranger, okay?”

If Juleka had her way they’d likely never speak again, but she offered a nod and pushed the door open with her back effectively closing the door on that relationship as she made her way up the stairs. Luka was napping on the couch when she entered, but she made no effort to be quiet as she slammed the bags down on the table in the kitchen and began rummaging through the cabinets to put everything away.

“Julie, you’ve always been the quiet one. Why all of the noise now?” He groaned after a while, shifting onto his side.

“Sorry, I’m just annoyed,” She mumbled, and he sat up with piqued interest, stretching an arm above his head.

“What happened? Are you okay? Do you feel like you’re gonna-”

“No.” She cut him off abruptly, stuffing the vegetables into the fridge and slapping a fish down onto a cutting board. “I’m fine just some chatty girl at the market.”

“Yeah, there are a lot of those around here,” Luka said dismissively, retrieving the carton of milk from the fridge and taking a swig.

“She brought up the night mom died,” Juleka stated as she cleaned the meat off the bone for her lazy black cat who laid in the window in the living room, and Luka paused momentarily before closing the milk and returning it to its spot.

“And?” He cocked a brow. “How’d you handle it?”

“It just reminded me that I’m not exactly welcome here,” She growled, eyes burning, and Luka placed a hand on her shoulder. “You’re lucky that you ended up mortal like dad. You don’t have to worry about hiding your secret from the world.”

“No.” He nodded, pressing his lips into a firm line. “But I do have to worry about my baby sister being burned at the stake for something she can’t help.”

Luka placed his hands over hers and gently removed the knife, setting it aside as Juleka buried her face in his chest. He held her tightly, petting her hair and whispering soothing vows of protection until her shaking ceased. Penny left her perch to join them, rubbing against Juleka’s legs and purring until she stooped to pick her up.

“I’m surprised this old hag is still alive,” Luka remarked, scratching behind her ears.

“Familiars live as long as their masters do, so hopefully she’ll have many more years left in her life,” She said matter-of-factly, kissing her forehead and setting her on the counter next to the plate of tuna she’d cut up. “Besides, she’s one of the last things I have that Mom gave me.”

“Are you going to practice in the woods tonight?” Luka asked, rubbing an apple on his shirt before taking a bite.

“Just a few protection spells to cast on the house,” She said with a nod, leaning against the counter while Penny munched away happily.

“Be careful,” Luka instructed solemnly with a pointed look, and Juleka flashed him a sardonic grin.

“Aren’t I always?”

#miraculous ladybug #julerose #juleka couffaine #rose lavillant #julerose june #my writing #midnight rose #fantasy au #luka's there too

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led123123 · 4 years

Text

https://youtu.be/LJOKAHGZLs0?t=414

damn.. I gotta sell my old cpu too..

I should sell it

I’m gonna.. stick the sticker.. with transparent tape.. and.. like.. I need pendrive for printer..

wait.. I have wifi in laptop.. so I can try printing with wifi..

I never used this printer

I can do that over wifi with laptop.

but I guess the printer needs to be turned on.. because I can’t see it on my laptop

I guess it’s turned off

I need to test the printer

https://youtu.be/jz5UbEjR9Ys?t=74

I told you.. I was thinking about.. “investing”.. in amd.. jesus..

their.. share value is probably rising a lot now again..

https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/AMD/?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAALqlly1c3x_R_JaV2YA7U_SBDEumtiABVa3vZhprk0izxN4yMZGCIxeTsa_Q5yecnhyuC3lNlo41sYc84EpDPmDx3l7HcVG1XmPWUacDE9Hb-tUq7HPHHe0hQEBeSsIm7v7kK9bpkdic0XL7vmygC6lzpjzM0YTbS-ZcV4QNtvVH

lol.. they knew about this 3 months ago already?? last time it was 50 now it’s 80

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC60YCQKHFyySHLRt0vPKdjg/videos

she lost like.. a lot of money on bitcoin.. xD

so like. my.. guess was right.. to invest in amd..

I mean.. relatively a lot.. because she said that she lost her job and has money for like.. 6 months or something

so it sounded bad

https://youtu.be/QWQxTK52uOU?t=115

https://youtu.be/QWQxTK52uOU?t=101

https://youtu.be/QWQxTK52uOU?t=128

she must have bought it late

https://youtu.be/QWQxTK52uOU?t=209

I don’t have any experience.. but.. to me.. like.. charts like.. I think that they don’t say much about company. it’s more important if the company has good products and how well it’s doing against competition

supermarket chain built a 2nd supermarket in my town.. and.. like.. they have a another supermarket near.. so they’re competing with them.. and.. like.. all the smaller shops.. won’t have as much profit I guess.. I woke up yesterday.. and their car.. was playing music at 9 am and announcing their 20% discount day.. it was so annoying

I don’t mind this as much when it’s not as early.. jesus..

https://youtu.be/jwzn3-8zfq8?t=83

so like.. my amd call was good

https://youtu.be/vHwZQp166UM?t=35

kayley was a “freelancer”

https://youtu.be/vHwZQp166UM?t=59

https://youtu.be/vHwZQp166UM?t=66

https://youtu.be/vHwZQp166UM?t=261

cryptocurrency..

she didn’t buy low..

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34?t=71

I dont know how people can made decissions based primarily on charts.. I think that everyone is just buying based on charts..

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34?t=233

https://youtu.be/EbhgjbjY3IY?t=40

https://youtu.be/EbhgjbjY3IY?t=224

https://youtu.be/EbhgjbjY3IY?t=320

https://youtu.be/EbhgjbjY3IY?t=516

she’s casting spells to keep the evil stock goblins away

one like a day keep the evil stock goblins away

omg.. that’s a new update..

it’s taking a lot of time

50 minutes..

https://youtu.be/q4FwKFk658c

https://youtu.be/Cq_tZbkr3N4

https://youtu.be/Cq_tZbkr3N4?t=67

https://youtu.be/Cq_tZbkr3N4?t=78

https://youtu.be/52hFeYzoeXU?t=17

https://youtu.be/xG2JDB34rzE?t=65

https://youtu.be/Ygw7xlgeJr8?t=1365

https://youtu.be/Ygw7xlgeJr8?t=2016

what the heck.. this is the mode where you can have same heroes on both teams

no that’s an illusion

https://youtu.be/Ygw7xlgeJr8?t=2059

https://youtu.be/Ygw7xlgeJr8?t=359

https://youtu.be/Ygw7xlgeJr8?t=475

australia, bulgaria

I had time to clean dishes and cook pasta..

now I’m back and there’s 1 minute and 30 seconds left

I was hungry so I grabbed red prince.. it feels.. like.. the taste I mean.. feels.. like it’s still not ready to eat.. it feels green..

I should wait like.. more time.. like few more weeks

why are they selling them.. why wants to buy these apples..

it feels like this one still needs like.. 3 weeks

it’s green under the skin.. and has like.. green color.. like.. it shouldn’t have that much green color.. that just means that it’s not ready

this one was too green.. maybe the next would be better..

the next one.. also is a bit green under the skin. but.. not as much.. and the center.. looks like it’s more ready to eating

it’s not as green inside as the previous one

I would say.. that they need like.. 3 more weeks..

that’s like.. I don’t know if picking up apples early makes any sense.. like.. they won’t get attacked by bugs.. but.. they’re not gonna.. like.. grow..

so like the apples has.. like.. this thing that is attached to the tree.. and it’s like.. kinda dry and thin.. and it gets all the substances it needs though that??

https://images.app.goo.gl/nciP64Pu11KiryEN9

https://images.app.goo.gl/eactHx1vqBKv8Srb9

stem

https://youtu.be/HDE2O7PVaWY?t=29

I don’t think I would ever eat a green apple.. never tried.. like..

they become yellow later right??

I used to eat yellow apples.

who would eat a green apple..

https://youtu.be/HDE2O7PVaWY?t=73

doesn’t look that bad

this one

https://youtu.be/XAu-fobaL7g

apple parts

https://youtu.be/XAu-fobaL7g?t=133

https://youtu.be/w9kI1_i6cpE?t=60

ok lets watch this trash

https://youtu.be/-VFED66ljVs?t=128

https://images.app.goo.gl/tJ9W7VomdtbdxYJN8

I didn’t see the loba voice actress before

https://youtu.be/hwNjJLxIHMA?t=362

jumpu

more voice actors for other languages

https://youtu.be/-q1MCeWH0Lo?t=67

https://youtu.be/-q1MCeWH0Lo?t=104

it looks like he either has anti aliasing maxed out.. or he’s playing on 1440p or something I don’t know

https://youtu.be/-q1MCeWH0Lo?t=181

that’s her real accent?? she’s from scotland??

https://youtu.be/-q1MCeWH0Lo?t=36

she’s is

https://www.youtube.com/c/RagTagg/videos

he is from scottland too

https://youtu.be/JAKSn5nD-EY?t=473

https://youtu.be/JAKSn5nD-EY?t=519

this doesn’t look like.. I don’t know.. like.. anti aliasing looks kinda.. I think

https://youtu.be/JAKSn5nD-EY?t=552

I mean.. the other video looks smoother.. maybe because scaling from 1440p

https://youtu.be/-q1MCeWH0Lo?t=89

looks a lot smoother

I could like.. up the settings.. maybe.. maybe I need to set higher settings..

https://youtu.be/8JJ65HQ_rT8?t=867

it looks the same

is it better to play on 1440p scaled to 1080p??

https://youtu.be/ltnlX3xMTOs?t=44

baka.. = ...

https://www.rd.com/article/supermarket-apples-10-months-old/

https://youtu.be/-q1MCeWH0Lo?t=249

I’m actually.. replacing phoenix kits for battery cells.. because I don’t really get to use the kit.. and I need cells to keep my shield full.. I’m not gonna keep trading with less than 150 hp..

because that makes me vulnerable for a very long time because of low hp.. and if I get third partied then I have no time to heal up..

if I get third partied.. it leaves me like.. caught with my pants down.. if I keep poking with like.. 115 hp.. and I get shot once.. for 47 hp lets say.. then I’m left with.. eee.... like.. 70 hp.. and I hear other squad being right next to us.. I don’t even have 1 second to pop a phoenix kit..

https://youtu.be/pa8ybvIvebM?t=19

another old video??...

https://youtu.be/GKFPSS4yc2s?t=87

r99 is back??

https://youtu.be/GKFPSS4yc2s?t=96

wtf

I still didn’t get banned.. I’m gonna get banned next time they check my text chat logs.. do they only save the logs from the game that I get reported??

why can’t they just.. like.. mute the.. censored words.. f*cking idiots..

instead of banning me

https://youtu.be/GKFPSS4yc2s?t=429

what’s its hitbox..

https://youtu.be/GKFPSS4yc2s?t=456

she’s not very short

almost like pathfinder. so like.. big hitbox

https://youtu.be/GKFPSS4yc2s?t=616

this map looks trash af

a car.. the map isn’t even big.. this car was the worst idea

r99 is back.. they already had.. new smg.. hemlok out.. 2 smgs.. now.. but it’s easier to find light ammo.. but it shoots faster.. so uses more ammo so takes more space in inventory..

but ammo is a lot easier to find

https://youtu.be/-VFED66ljVs?t=130

https://youtu.be/5EqSQetCTug?t=136

https://youtu.be/CfZSf3mUu3M

https://youtu.be/CfZSf3mUu3M?t=28

map looks the worst

https://youtu.be/CfZSf3mUu3M?t=98

damn

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=20

they’re trying to make the characters too realistic..

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=27

she looks weird in this suit..

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=78

that’s a big deal

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=162

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=225

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=488

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=634

hemlok was supposed to be removed

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1015

that one dude.. headshot me with whole burst one time..

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1116

it’s not good map for a car.. it’s too small and there’s too many obstacles..

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1169

it wasn’t bad.. I mean.. yes.. tbh.. in early game.. people have like.. usually like blue shields.. 75 hp.. so.. yes.. in lategame sentinel is not a good weapon to have..

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1253

wingman hop up is useless

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1272

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1309

omg thank god..

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1320

omg. they finally made this game playable

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1322

omfg

https://youtu.be/7wAxp6aqa9o?t=1328

omg..

why are they set that high damage per tick before..

https://youtu.be/4b8_q9eMcJ0?t=27

it looks disgusting..

I’m getting back to different game

that’s a lot of damage for evo 4 shield

https://youtu.be/4b8_q9eMcJ0?t=329

maybe I increase mouse sensitivity.. it looks like he has really high sensitivity

maybe I just.. increase.. I mean.. I could try.. increasing sensitivity and reducing ads sensitivity

https://youtu.be/4b8_q9eMcJ0?t=498

lvl 3 ring.. only 5% damage

https://youtu.be/4b8_q9eMcJ0?t=584

his sensitivity seems pretty high

https://images.app.goo.gl/hMwm3pC9janz3uJC8

https://youtu.be/r3QjNv9K36k?t=165

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs?t=68

lol

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs?t=175

not reloaded

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs?t=230

these last 3 shots were good

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs?t=277

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs?t=176

no reloaded.. xD

https://youtu.be/FkXf-kd2aos

https://youtu.be/V84YY9VVCiE?t=101

I still have no idea where he is.. lol..

https://youtu.be/lyeyG8VXxOs?t=237

https://youtu.be/PgedopvFPwI?t=114

https://youtu.be/PgedopvFPwI?t=128

https://youtu.be/PgedopvFPwI?t=666

https://youtu.be/PgedopvFPwI?t=681

his edges also look really smooth..

is this because he’s playing on 1440p or.. because of high anti aliasing settings

no.. my image quality doesn’t look that bad.. it looks worse when I’m moving.. lol.. when I’m not moving then it looks good

that must be the settings

“radeon boost - reduces resolution during motion.. to increase performance”

but I don’t have this option on..

omg I really had my sensitivity so low?? I increased it a lot higher now.. and it feels normal

previous was slow

this one feels a lot more of what is should be

I had lower resolution before.. so like.. when I switched to higher.. it needs to be adjusted again..

I increased again because it didn’t feel that fast

https://youtu.be/FkXf-kd2aos

this was on lower resolution

chrome crashed on me.. too much ram used

lol stray.. lol.. he also.. was like.. “it’s lagging..” people were saying that he had too many tabs on chrome opened..

his computer was lagging..

I had too many tabs opened..

but it was working fine.. I just opened too many tabs.. it was working fine with hard drive page file so page file on hard drive works normal

my mouse sensitivity was really slow.. I increased it like.. 3 or more times.. I don’t remember exactly.. before it was really slow..

https://youtu.be/XcmojY2vxJM?t=13

https://youtu.be/-dtS76NxmPg?t=103

never seen like.. people say that

https://youtu.be/-dtS76NxmPg?t=204

she has nice skin color and.. I like how her skin color and her hair look together

that was like.. good lighting.. it’s usually the lighting playing a big role how everything looks

https://youtu.be/-dtS76NxmPg?t=234

lighting changed

https://youtu.be/hwNjJLxIHMA?t=34

I can flick faster with faster sensitivity. it feels a lot better for controlling.. aim

it’s not like.. slow so I don’t need to drag mouse across entire mousepad.. and faster

I used to have high sensitivity on low resolution too.. but.. I changed resolution.. and.. I didn’t know what sensitivity to set.. what value

https://youtu.be/hwNjJLxIHMA?t=77

he has good sensitivity. I increased mine.. like.. 3 or more times.. and now I realize that it was really slow

https://youtu.be/hwNjJLxIHMA?t=86

his sensitivity is pretty fast

I don’t know how I could play on a lot lower sensitivty..

I need to sell this cpu.. it was a mistake.. I didn’t realize that I need more threads..

https://youtu.be/hwNjJLxIHMA?t=290

these maps looked really good.. the new one.. it’s just..

it looks like this.. other map.. from different game.. something.. like..

hyper scape

https://youtu.be/94RCi3bKggQ?t=210

catapulting is stupid

paladins is better

https://youtu.be/94RCi3bKggQ?t=245

super tall buildings are stupid.. pubg maps are really good

https://youtu.be/hwNjJLxIHMA?t=422

this is kinda.. the sensitivity that.. I had before changing resolution

but mine was like.. actually higher.. I guess.. but it was too high

or I had mouse acceleration on I don’t know

because idk how old that that clip

https://youtu.be/litHbKaFMN4

https://youtu.be/litHbKaFMN4?t=13

this one was actually not bad sensitivity.. but ads sensitivity feels.. maybe a bit too.. high.. I think I had like.. I set higher ads sensitivity.. then I think

instead of 1 I had like.. 1.2 or 1.3 maybe even

https://youtu.be/litHbKaFMN4?t=14

but this one looks quite fast

it looks quite correct speed

https://youtu.be/litHbKaFMN4?t=41

ads maybe was too fast.. maybe I set ads too fast.. I don’t know

I think that they were changing these options few times

https://youtu.be/q4FwKFk658c?t=75

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs?t=39

this mouse sensitivity also seems good

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs?t=51

this one feels really natural

like. correct speed value

and ads is not as fast as before

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs?t=114

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs?t=178

it’s fast but not impossible to control ( the ads speed)

https://youtu.be/BN5me-2CZWw

https://youtu.be/Ob3-aNX5pUQ?t=221

https://youtu.be/Ob3-aNX5pUQ?t=283

https://youtu.be/TfzPzMi2M6g?t=31

https://youtu.be/o-OrWu4KFrw

https://youtu.be/o-OrWu4KFrw?t=52

https://youtu.be/o-OrWu4KFrw?t=182

https://youtu.be/zoJ4kDanGCY?t=1170

wr also died.

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs?t=46

this sensitivity is good.. I still don’t know if I need to set is higher or is this one enough

https://youtu.be/t3xrS3ojTDs?t=148

lol

https://youtu.be/YM7nJvnNnzQ

that’s also.. hebrew right??

https://youtu.be/wJVPLGNSSJ0

I’m alone..

https://youtu.be/8FQkEm_XTy8

https://youtu.be/i5PJ6Cwy7mQ

omg what a crazy game..

this sensitivity is so easy

but I was playing music so I can’t upload..

r-99.. loba.. infinite ammo

omg. this program broke again..

what the hell

omg it’s so much fun playing

f*ck my game didn’t record again.. why.. is this garbage not working normal

why the f*ck is it not recording..

what a f*cking trash..

I don’t know.. maybe.. it was because of this.. crash.. because I ran out of ram I really don’t know.. maybe it was because I was using too much ram.. I guess..

jesus..

with chrome 32GB is like.. 64 is minimum..

imagine having 64 on laptop..

I had to much fun playing first time.. but it didn’t record.. I’m gonna kill these idiots.. it happens all the time.. it’s because of ram.. I think

when was the last time this happened to me.. I don’t know..

I won.. 2nd game.. wait.. first game.. I had rambo teammates too.. but.. we didn’t win..

oh. nice skin of the new hero

I need to rank up again

some teams are really bad

it’s fun

good that it’s not too cold

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34?t=14

“decent red day�� xD

I though red can only be bad

it can be good if you wanna buy

I’m bad at controlling r99 recoil

damn this was so much fun.. playing.. and this car.. is just.. xD such a.. it’s so funny.. especially with giblartar as driver.. this giblartar makes me laugh he’s funny..

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34?t=63

red day means... like.. I don’t understand.. like.. a lot of market violatility?? but if it’s red.. then... like.. you can’t make a profit.. unless you.. buy low sell high

if you buy low.. that’s an opportunity maybe that’s what she meant

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34?t=87

I don’t understand buying “stocks” based on charts.. that’s a russian roulette.. I guess..

how much she lost??

6k?? omg..

https://youtu.be/Th6AfCWdK34?t=234

6k. xD

she must have bought a lot of shares

I feel kinda.. “detached”..

from real world.. I don’t how else to call it

https://youtu.be/pDhTrvq3Oog?t=18

she sounds like a kid who is learning how to talk

https://youtu.be/pDhTrvq3Oog?t=75

invented english

https://youtu.be/pDhTrvq3Oog?t=92

https://youtu.be/pDhTrvq3Oog?t=154

if I’m alone.. and.. I play game.. then I feel detached.. and..

https://youtu.be/VT5n6ipGGyA?list=PLjzSBgd8kSOV5TM60Vq2jHeSeH2hbikay&t=328

princess lia?? that’s from star trek right??

why so many people subscribed to her.. like.. she doesn’t make like.. she’s not making.. like.. colaboration videos with anybody on youtube

https://www.youtube.com/c/SSSniperWolf/videos

she’s just a reactor.. she’s just over reacting

all she’s doing is making reaction videos

that’s so f*cking.. all she does is making reactions

she doesn’t make videos with.. anyone new..

and only reaction videos.. reaction after reaction after reaction chain reaction

https://youtu.be/hOC-lSVlF9s?t=5

and like.. I was watching on low resolution.. I guess.. maybe.. I don’t know.

or she just has.. like.. too much lighting.. or too blurry camera..

because her videos... look blurry.. they don’t look sharp..

https://youtu.be/BJpUSd6OBiM?t=31

blurry

https://youtu.be/BJpUSd6OBiM?t=113

she’s like.. recording in like.. 1080p or something.. and.. scaling.. so it looks blurry.. after scaling..

her background has too much light..

there’s too much light..

and my eyes are just.. like.. I’m wondering if I’m going blind when I look at how blurry her video is

https://youtu.be/BJpUSd6OBiM?t=173

too much light too white background.. and.. blurry

https://youtu.be/VT5n6ipGGyA?list=PLjzSBgd8kSOV5TM60Vq2jHeSeH2hbikay&t=898

she was talking about her anxiety in this video.. when she was playing.. I was like.. that’s like.. similar to how I was feeling.. and I’m.. still feeling like that

https://youtu.be/QJ87793QXes

https://youtu.be/QJ87793QXes?t=46

https://youtu.be/QJ87793QXes?t=115

there’s nothing else to do

https://youtu.be/xG2JDB34rzE?t=36

omg.. not a giblartar.. it randomed giblartar..

“club”?? xD lol

gay clubs in apex legends.. new feature

“gay club”

https://youtu.be/8FEHZDGp2Nk

fucking trash..

I’m starting to feel better.

maybe I had to open window.. for more air..

I needed to just open window maybe..

one dude did 3k damage in my game

damn.. I died.. million times..

3k damage..

https://youtu.be/8FEHZDGp2Nk?t=794

I’m feeling.. not as bad.. because I opened window.. I guess

I don’t know.. I guess it’s because I opened window

it was because I had closed window..

0 notes

amidalogicdive · 6 years

Text

I was tagged by @geekgoddess813 who was interested in hearing what I would say lol. IDK why, I'm such a pleb asdfghjkl XD hahaha! But, I did it for you!

Instructions:

To celebrate a year of FFXV and the end of the first year of updates, let’s spread the FFXV love! I haven’t seen a tag meme like this for FFXV yet, so I decided to make one. If you see this and want to, copy/paste this list and share what your favorite things about FFXV are.

Favorite Chocobro:

Oh, my god, this isn’t fair, so I can’t say Nyx?! Lol, ok no seriously. If Noctis counts, he’s my favorite. If it has to be one of the other three, it would be Ignis. I’ve always loved Ignis and (fun fact) before I was a huge NyxNoct shipper, I was an Ignoct shipper. If ya look back I have a few Ignoct fics...that I still need to finish. >.<

Favorite Guest Party Member (including Ravus and Libertus from DLC):

Oh damn, this is hard. This is really hard, I’ve deleted my response like three times cuz I keep on going ‘oh but what about…’ Ugh, do I have to pick, can I plead the fifth? Ugh fine…

Ravus - Because I loved getting more backstory on him. This poor boy was so wronged, and while he did come off as an ass, everything he was doing was for Luna.

Aranea - Girl got some sass and I love it, she was fun to listen too and I’m glad she was tossed into a DLC as a guest party member. We needed more Aranea in FFXV

Cor - Damn son, I love this man here. I need to know more, I want more backstory. Seriously, he got the respect of Gilgamesh!! GILGAMESH TALKS ABOUT THIS LITTLE IMMORTAL LION! *flails*

Yeah, I couldn’t pick :P

Favorite Minor Character(s):

Can I pick two? CAN I?! Biggs and Wedge - Ok ok, they weren’t in it a lot but I loved them. They were funny and their loyalty to Aranea was just, ugh. I really liked them and I wanted more of their back and forth, especially with Aranea lol. When she asked them to drive a train into a daemon-infested city - which was basically a suicide mission for all they knew and they are just like, oh that's all? Yes boys, yes!

Favorite Villain:

This is so easy, frikin Ardyn ‘Trash Jesus’ Izunia. What, you didn’t hear me, let me repeat: ARDYN ‘TRASH JESUS’ IZUNIA. Ok, let me explain something here. This boy, this BOY WAS SO WRONGED. He did everything that was asked of him, and what happens? He gets fucked over by his brother, the crystal changes his mind and the gods - not only do they turn against him, but they won’t even let him pass on into the afterlife. Dragonbutt needs to get some balls, but damn son, you did nothing! You caused this problem to happen!

This man had 2000 years of suffering, hatred, and betrayal built up inside of him and he went off the deep end. Like he said, it wasn’t even about Noctis. He was just the poor sap that was born to be the King of Light. This was revenge against a crystal that denied him and the gods that turned their back on him. And you can see it, you can see he’s still hurting, you can see there is a good man that’s been tainted by thousands of years of torment. When he tells his story to Noct, you can see the pain, and when Noct beats him, you can see that he thinks Noct’s going to do the same thing the Gods, Crystal and his brother did. Erase him. I love this trashy man, and I can’t wait for this DLC.

Favorite Kingsglaive Character:

No Surprise: Nyx. Do I really need to explain why? He’s an amazing, cocksure, humble, hurting little ball of fire that fights like the daemons and just makes my heart do weird things in my chest. This man is so frikin badass, even the Kings had to bow down to him and let him take charge. This dry sense of humor and self-sacrificing nature is just asdfghjkl and though all of it he never forgot who he was and what he was fighting for. Like he said, his life means nothing but giving a future to those who wanna see it is everything. Oh, baby, your life is everything, and he deserved better, damn it.

And don’t even get me talking about the fact that three, THREE frikin people put on that ring (four of you count Luche, but eh…) and all three asked the Kings for their strength and two of them for sure (Nyx and Ignis) offered to sacrifice their life and only NYX FRIKIN DIED.

No, don’t get me started - cuz we are talking more salt then the dead sea here… >.<

Favorite Astral/Divine Being:

Funny thing, I have always loved Shiva since like FFVIII. She’s my Queen, I bow down to her… but before I realized that Gentiana was Shiva, I was in love with Gentiana. When I saw her in clips before the game came out I was thinking: Woman I don’t know who you are, or what your role is, but please I love you. Her being Shiva, my Queen, my everything… that just made it even better. Lol, so obviously - Shiva.

Favorite Character Overall:

Noctis. He is a very self-sacrificing and strong character who goes through a lot and honestly, finds his courage and self-worth. I think he had a lot of issues before, I think he was depressed and didn’t feel like he was right for the throne, and he was just playing a part. Once he was out there, once he realized what had happened and that he was now King, things changed. He because braver, and stronger. He started putting his trust in others as much as they put their trust in him. He realized that he didn’t have to do things and save people for the recognition, just doing was enough. You can see the impact that it had in comrades, where people (just random NPCs) talk about a boy or four boys in black who saved them, or helped fix their car or did some random act for them and how much it meant. He goes from a kinda sheltered boy to a King who knows what sacrifice is. I love his change, and how he keeps going. Like he told Iggy, they can’t stop, they have to keep going or everyone who sacrificed their lives for him, it would be pointless.

Noct is a good boy. :3

Favorite Weapon:

Nyx kukri that you get in Insomnia, oh don’t act like you’re surprised lol. Noctis always has them on him and I use them a lot.

Favorite Location:

Omg, so many people are gonna disagree and be like: What?! *flails* - I like Altissia lol. It was confusing at first, but now I know my way around pretty well, and I love the 3x exp from the hotel. >.>

And I love the arena and gambling lol, and that was the first time I head the whole “this place is so romantic” “And you're here with us, all three of us, you are a lucky man” and about died. Lol

Favourite Quest/Questline/Hunt:

The fishing questline. Hush, don’t laugh at me… I honestly really love fishing in this game and I loved the fishing questline with Navyth.

Favorite Boss:

Ardyn, lol. He’s such a shit and I love to listen to him shit talk Noctis as they fight. Ifrit was a good fight too, so kudos to that fiery SOB. lol

Favorite Monster/Monster Family/etc:

Tonberry, I’ve always loved Tonberry with their cute little lanterns and their stabby frikin knifes. They are small, cute and ruthless. It's like that scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail “Aww it's just a little Bunny Rabbit…. RUN AWAY RUN AWAY!!” Yeah, Tonberry! :D

Oh, and Coeurls. Just cuz I like cats and much respect for something that can one-shot me with lightning from its whiskers lol.

Favorite Song:

Please like I can pick just one… So like here are my top whatever:

Nox Aeterna: So short but so much emotion. Nox Divina: Badass summoning music, yes, please! Noctis: It was not what I was expecting, and it was a very pleasant surprise! Prayer De Luna: This is just asdfghjkl she’s got a beautiful theme and ya gotta respect it. Dewdrops at Dawn: So beautiful, simple and just all the feels. Just makes me think of the people seeing the sunrise after such a long time, or for the first time for some… and realizing what Noct gave up for them. Somnus: The original, the beauty that it is. This song is a godsend, I love it and I love her voice.

Favorite Boss Theme:

Does Somnus Ultima count? I mean its basically the second part of the... fight? Damn, I love that song! Ok if not, Magna Insomnia is epic, and love it. Also, Hellfire, damn that opening (the first like 18 seconds) sounds so ominous like wtf did I get myself into here lol.

But honestly, all around this soundtrack and all of the music is epic - honestly, there is no song I hate, except maybe Stand By Me - but only because it makes me FEEL THINGS PPL SJHAFKLHSJ!! Just kidding I love it too. ;-;

Favorite Non-Episode DLC/Update/Event:

Assassin’s Festival was awesome and I want them to put the whole roof thing into Lestallum full time so we can run up there and have fun lol. Think of all the NPC’s and shit they could put up there and quests they could add. Yes, please lol.

Favorite Episode DLC:

Ugh, ok. It’s a toss-up.

I love Episode Ignis because it adds so much to the story and the alternate endings, yes, please. I love that SE made the end of this game so transparent and said that the ending of the main game was simply an Alternate Reality, something that could have happened. Now they start tossing in all these other endings and you realize that one choice, one thing did differently could have changed the whole outcome of the game asdfghjkl. I know some don’t like it, but like Episode Ignis said: Possibilities. And I love those possibilities.

That said - Episode Prompto, and him finally finding out who he was, dealing with it and coming to terms with it. Finally having the courage to tell his friends, look this is what I am. Not only to see them accept him but for him to accept himself… it was great!

Other Favorites of Note:

I love:

flying the Regalia, except when I crash and kill them all.

hitting the breaks when Noctis is sitting on the trunk and seeing him getting all pissed off.

the fishing and I need to catch them all.

the shit talking they do while fighting

the new character switch during battle and the geeky things they do and say.

just driving around and listening to the soundtracks.

the pics that Prompto takes.

Idk, there is so much to list. I mean is it a perfect game? No. But do I love it and do I enjoy playing it? 100% Yes.

Anyway, I sometimes like all the plot holes that they leave all over the place. Perfect for me to build a fic around and let my own imagination inspire me. I haven’t loved a Final Fantasy game like this in a long time, and I'm glad that I do. It made me meet some really nice people and fall into a perfect little life raft of feels that makes up the NyxNoct fandom!

So, let's see what y’all gotta say now. I tag (and you don’t have to do it lol especially if you already did!): @prettyprompto @aithilin @courtingdestruction @grimmvertigo @jazzraft @midnightpyres @rsasai @argent-the-moderately-useful @ghostl0rd @ignoctgirl @cardigan-carm @glaivenoct @nicolareed @nicrt @stylishchocobutt @bezier-curve

#thanks for the tag!#look I tag ppl too #logicdive rambles #yay I finished it #this was fun lol #ffxv #ffxv talk

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