#wow ok TMI girl

[katnissgirlsmakedo]

logically i know that merlin was being made over ten years ago and that’s why it’s Like That but also i cannot help but be completely captivated by the Like That of it.

#actually i don’t think they have an excuse to be homophobic. cassandra clare was releasing tmi at exactly the same time #which is not something i’ve ever thought about before but. wow. #city of ashes came out the same year merlin premiered #huh. letting that sink it. the same year obama was elected. the same year i got my julie american girl doll #damn that’s crazy. also. the recession. which i must admit i forgot about. sorry i was busy with my american girl dolls idk #what the hell was this post supposed to be about how did we get here #wait city of lost souls came out the same year season five aired. in a post twilight landscape #but a pre-dystopia craze landscape. actually right on the cusp. has anyone analyzed that societal transition? we went from twilight to the #hunger games in like the same year. and then it was a weird mix of supernatural romance and dystopian teen movies for a while #and then of course the mcu took over everything and now we live in hell where there are no real blockbuster movies anymore #wow now i’m depressed about the state of cinema. not what this post was for. #whatever. my point was going to be this. has any interviewer tried asking anyone involved with merlin about It All NOW. like has anyone #tried to bring it up in the past nine years. i feel like if we tried again they’d have more to say #can some bullshit streaming service show cast katie mcgrath in something so she can be super famous online for like a month am #and she can say what needs to be said. i trust her #if EYE was in charge of some dumb show’s pr i’d cast one of these bitches just for this purpose #i can’t believe no one has thought of this #ok i’ll shut up now i know the post got away from me #beth.txt

[weebsinstash]

Ok so tmi (on the tmi blog lol) but the first day of my Cycle I had a dream that I had just given birth and I was holding my baby and I was goddamn euphoric even though the logical part of me was like “???? I am 22 and broke i CANNOT have a baby rn” and I woke up crying and called my friends like I WANNA HAVE A BAAAAAABYYYYY I WANT A BAAAAAAABYYYYYYYY so basically. Imagine. Miguel catches you in a moment of weakness. And he NEVER. FUCKING. FORGETS IT.

Oh wow girlie those period hormones grabbed you by the uterus and absolutely REFUSED to let go

NO BUT FOR REAL don't look at me but I've been thinking of a concerning number of ideas where it's like, "Reader suddenly realizes they may want a baby and is actually putting serious thought into it and Miguel finds out (bet your ass Peter B tells him, i can see him as a "well intentioned" platonic guardian/mentor figure who sells you out to Miguel the second he thinks you're doing something risky or he thinks it's for your own good) and Miguel starts making all these plans and preparations behind your back to have a baby with you" and obviously I like the extra juicy option of "he found out you got extremely depressed and tied your tubes or something because you either see no point in you having a kid/think it's too late, OR, Miguel was the only person you were looking at as a potential father and you either decide it wouldn't work out or he does something to hurt you and you lose trust in him" so like, the double whammy combo of him being hit with the news you basically walled off your fertility that he's kinda fantasizing about AND you blame him for it

You see him chokeslam Miles on the train and having all these serious anger and stress issues and you're like "hmmmm don't like that" and basically make the tubal ligation appointment that week (but, you know, he'll either interfere before you can actually get it or even reverse it later on)

Like. Ugh I'm not sure if I should go super into detail bc I feel like I want to put this scene in the YouTwo fic or in a different idea i have thats more centered around motherhood, but, picture he catches you in his monitor room one day after you've lost your home dimension, you're having a little more than just a small identity crisis, and he catches you having Lyla show you the model for your life, or what the algorithm had predicted your life was supposed to be like before your universe just magically poofed away. You're just staring at these holograms with tears running down your face and he occasionally catches you starting to reach out like you want to touch what you see. He comes to stop you because he already knows all too well where this could lead, you can't become tempted to break canon and go somewhere else, but you beg him to let you watch just a little longer

"I was supposed to get MARRIED! I was supposed to have a BABY! I was supposed to have a family!! It's not fair!!"

And he's in total agreement with you because, who even fucking knows why your universe suddenly destabilized and vanished. He sees you as this person who has so much promise and potential who had their destiny and future literally snatched away from them and now you're lost and confused on what you're supposed to do, like really he totally understands why you feel so aimless. But watching these holograms is like torturing yourself, and he goes to stop you when you just keep crying because this is basically sending you into a critical mental health episode

"Someone was supposed to fall in love with me... we were supposed to have a baby... would I have been a good mom? Would I have had a boy or a girl? Cant you at least let me find out what my daughter's name would have been?"

And it's like NOOOO you can't hit him with the daughter card, don't you see what you've DONE!!! Gets him right in the heart. Now he's got this massive soft spot for you, bigger than it already was anyways, and he can tell over time you're just really starting to, grieve the future you were supposed to have, falling into a depression. Peter B is hanging around with Mayday like he usually does as both men can tell you're really staring at his baby today and he offers to teach you how to hold her. you're standing there misty eyed twirling one of her little curls around your finger as her dad starts volunteering information to you, "you know she's about XYZ months old now, they aren't really talking yet at this age but they're really curious about their surroundings and--"

Miguel watches as you start talking about children and suddenly get this really really tortured expression and just say "it's not meant to happen" and or some combination of "it's too late for me" and gives him his baby back a little too quickly in typical "I am clearly leaving the room to go cry" fashion. Meanwhile Peter B is like 38 wondering why you think you're out of time or it's not supposed to happen

Miguel's working one day and Peter is trying to shove his phone in his face, "you know I think this is one of the BEST photos of Mayday I've ever taken, she's looking so cute here, you just GOTTA see it" and Pete just won't let up and Miguel finally looks just to humor him because the man is being unusually annoying and, it's a photo of Mayday, duh, but being held by you, and you're clearly looking down at her with watering eyes and the smallest little smile that says "I'll die for you" and Peter is just all 😏 as Miguel is 'suddenly' interested in the photo. "That's a really good photo of MAYDAY, right? 😏 I figured you would like it, that photo of MAYDAY 😏" and Miguel is just grumbling and grouchy bc he sees what this guy is tryna do, but he's still like ".... send it to me later, I'm trying to work right now"

It's even worse if you're a member of his strike force because you're constantly around him, Peter B, and Jess. Miguel just, idly wondering where you are and deciding to walk around a little bit and eventually finds that you're having some sort of conversation with Peter B and Jess and he can tell you look really weepy as the other woman invites you to feel her baby kicking, like, you could not more obviously be developing baby fever, and you ARE around that age, and ESPECIALLY if you live in Nueva York because it's like, YEAH you're still a Spider and YEAH you help the Society with stuff but. Your home universe is gone, your canon is gone, you're kind of. Free as a bird really? But you're also scared because, if someone was destined to love you, does that mean it technically isn't meant to be to fall for anyone else? You can't exactly hook up with people at the Spider Society because of canon or them already having relationships, and you don't exactly have identifying documents if you wanted to try and adopt

I think it'd really reach a stressful breaking point if you and the strike force go to another universe to fight an anomaly and Miguel catches you staring out into the crowd of people you just saved and he sees what youre looking at instantly and his heart sinks. Another you, another normal you, never bitten by a Spider, is standing there with her husband and her little sputtering baby, and he has to all but drag you away as you cry "it's not fair, it's not fair, why does SHE get a normal life!!"

Sidebar for a moment, I think that's probably also one thing that would be so INFURIATING about the doppelganger stealing your life story because THEY have a home universe and YOU don't. They take your life, they take literally everything you have left, your friends, your sense of community, your literal purpose. I've already decided on YTs motivations but could you imagine you finding out YouTwo actually has a decent life and maybe even a husband and kid of their own and you're just furious because they're basically abandoning their duties back home not only as a Spider but as a parent/spouse to steal what YOU have? You can't kill them because it would break their canon and kill like countless people but Miguel and the others would def let you beat the shit out of your evil double and get some of your anger out. Like. Jesus could you imagine Miguel kicks you out thinking you're the fake and after you're gone, YouTwo breaks canon and that's what exposes them, or theyre exposed when they eventually take a trip back home and get caught. The Society's regret, the guilt, the anger, just marinate me with the drama

But anyways back to Being Sad and Babycrazy, you go missing one day and Miguel has to decide what to do when he finally tracks your bracelet and you're back in THAT dimension again. He has to physically track you down using your bracelet's signal because you refuse to answer his messages and you're, in the home of the other you while she takes a brief nap, in the nursery, holding her baby. Miguel quietly climbs through the window and you're in a rocking chair and you've got her hugged to your chest and your eyes are closed and you sense him and, obviously cry because you know you have to leave. Unlike with the holograms he doesn't give you any leeway on this, putting his foot down that this has to end here, this cant go on, this is already so dangerous. And, you're good for him and understand, leaving the baby back in its crib as you and Miguel warp away. You're heartbroken but ultimately understanding when he has to disable your watch's ability to visit that specific dimension again, and you're obviously extremely depressed for a while, having multiple Spiders coming to check in on you as word spreads around that you aren't doing well

I can just see Reader becoming kind of desperate because the only options for a baby you really have left is to either 1. get a serious relationship, which you're scared of because you have to trust that person and who can you even pick, you're nervous about breaking canon or something, or 2. Get some random person to impregnate you so you can run off with the baby

Miguel gets a call from Peter B that you went to a bar and you're EXTREMELY wasted as you try to pick someone, ANYONE up and like, you have admirers for sure but there's enough decent people around to keep the creeps in line, clearly you are in a vulnerable state of mind right now, and Miguel gets to tote your drunken ass back home as you drunkenly word vomit all your feelings to him because, unfortunately for you, he has your trust, and you need comfort right now, and you even ask him about what being a parent was like for him. You encouragingly tell him he shouldn't give up if he still wants kids, you trying to be genuinely nice and not trying to imply anything, blubbering about how he deserves to still be happy and he's still got time, and here's Miguel who's practically tracking your cycles at this point, TOTALLY not going to use anything you say to him while you're piss-drunk against you

Especially if you add ABO into the mix and you have a Miguel who's either Alpha/Omega and is already babycrazy af and he sees you literally fucking YEARNING for it, like. You've got a 6'9" Alpha basically looking at you, his poor lil Omega crush, with the big yandere goo goo eyes and how you need all this love and support and stability and how you're in need of a proper husband and of course he's all too willing to volunteer himself for the job. Even if he's too awkward to come right out to you and say it, he'll be thinking in his head and planning behind your back ways to take care of you, keep you away from any drugs/alcohol (no more smoking weed with metro boomin Spiderman, you've gotta detox your body to have a baby! Also, different concept but, Miguel basically keeping you in a bubble to control all your meals and recreational activities and all of that so he can make sure you're perfectly healthy for a baby)

Don't let this man catch you slipping up! Throw you to the Spider Society and you'll come back pregnant 😭 he sees you so depressed and wanting a baby and it's like well, if your life needs new meaning, he can help literally make one for you 😏 he's been feeling protective and nurturing of you anyways, so, it's an extra benefit for him to think of getting to have both you AND a little baby of your very own ❤️

#yandere miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #yandere spidereverse #sinprompts #yandere stuff #godddd listening to light the city up reallt gets me hyped

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

this girl one time wanted to have sex with me and when i asked to use a condom she laughed it off and said it wasnt cool, and began to chip away at my boundary until i gave her what she wanted. she kept trying to get me to do things and i would say no, and she would continue asking anyway. in bed she said something like “you said you would” and that legitimately scared me, because it seemed like she was just blatantly lying to my face, or just forgot. then she called herself a succubus (A DEMON) and my gut screamed at me to be careful around her. sorry this may be TMI, but im anon so whatever, she said i could nut in her, which is the complete opposite of my original boundary. she was so sweet otherwise and communicated really good. except for when i texted her my concerns about being manipulated. she just became really defensive. im really happy im not “under her spell” anymore. i dont know what she was trying to do, but she could have hurt me really bad

its not tmi, its ok, you know me :p <3.. im sorry your boundaries were disrespected :( ill put my answer under read more cus its probly gona be long , this message had me contemplating some things..

IMO : sex is so tricky its been a struggle my whole life to understand how i feel about it & where my boundaries lie + allowing myself to express them so i understand the struggle u present here altho it's a different perspective.. some people use sex as a vehicle to gain power over others, by way of luring their partner into a state of vulnerability, i dont think that's something demonic necessarily i think it's usually more surface level than that. however

you do see a huge rise in the amount of ppl kind of, trying to personify the succubus nowadays? ppl have always wanted to be sexy but it's like different than the way ppl wanted to be sexy when i was younger. it got rly mainstream to have kind of a demon aesthetic if that makes sense? when i was younger this stuff was reserved for the relentlessly bullied & punished Goth and Emo kids.

but ok when i worked at spencers gifts in 2021/22 they had all these shirts of anime succubus girls getting choked and in bondage n shit, and these shirts were their best sellers they were outselling most the band tees and franchises like naruto.. and im telling youuu it was like, the youngest girls always buying these shirts, it made me so uncomfortable!! sometimes i would walk away and get my coworker to ring them up cus i was like nah im not selling a child that shit...but it really made me think like wow if i was in 7th grade and wore this shit to school it wou;dve been like wearing a giant KICK MY ASS!!!! target on my back but it's like, a popular thing rn.

and im not saying the bullying should return ofc, not the point. but it lead me down the string of thought wondering why this stuff is being pushed into the mainstream so heavily. sex sells i guess $$$ but yeah i think right now it's especially common to refer to yourself as a succubus if you're trying to feel a sense of power as a woman. because as a woman there are very few ways to gain power other than using sex. and many people want power! but i dont think most of them are demonic. just lost..

still its good u followed ur instinct to stay away from that girl because it is really cruel to manipulate someone in a moment where they've trusted you enough to be close to them like that.

yeah i think its rly rare for someone to be in some true demonic possession shit but i feel there can be dark things that linger *around* people who have weak spiritual armor and sort of, feast off their energy & create misfortunes around the person that generate bad energy for it to feed off of. but i dont think they have too much control over your actions like i would imagine for someone who's truly possessed. i feel a lot of ppl have these sort of ambient malignant attachments especially if they keep a lot of dark imagery & symbols around thinking it's just an aesthetic.

thas just my thoughts....really bored tonite so im typing a lot.... i love sex i think it can be so beautiful and restoring, it helps me feel so much happier in life to have good sex regularly i dont think sex or sexiness is evil. i just think its easy for ppl w bad intentions to turn it into this whole twisted ass mind game when it shld rly b so simple and natural and a loving connection that sets u free......be safe out there anon be discerning! protect you heart..<3

[missveryvery]

Would you ever play bg3 as Trelle?

I keep thinking about it.

But you have unlocked something I want to vent/ramble about, anon. Forgive me.

Here's a TMI/depression dump that you can skip if you like to get to the pertinent answer at the bottom.

I, myself, am getting some, idk, ptsd shit from the game from how much trauma they dump on you and how you have to check in on everyone and do things for them and no one is taking care of you or asking about your own shit. I'm in too deep at this point to not finish at least one of my playthroughs but there's different places where characters are really fucking with you in painful ways.

So after I finish one (1) I will need to take a fucking breather before I start another. It can be good to go "ok, do you see the red flags you missed here? All the things that made you uncomfortable that you ignored for affection/attention/"the greater good"/being a team player/"being a good person" etc? Do you see how you could recognize it happening to other characters but not yourself?" in the safety of a game, but the feelings and sensations it brings up are real.

I get really bad nightmares, but the difference between a normal person with nightmares and me is that my brain doesn't "let go" of them the way it's supposed to so I get the trauma without the cleansing benefits of processing that stuff your brain is supposed to do when you sleep. This is why I avoid a lot of content with bad endings or that are just too fucked up or upsetting. I avoid a lot of media period now, I can't finish shows because I'm afraid of how they'll end, that they'll end badly (even just in some unsatisfying way like it's just badly written) and I'll be residually upset for too long.

I did not realize how upsetting this game would be, I thought it would be more "Honor Among Thieves" fun in tone but it's relentlessly heavy, and your "accomplishments" are all "realistic" in a "you can only do so much way". You save the Grove and...horrific things still happen. Some of the people there are still exclusionary pieces of shit. Even Halsin comes to the city and starts going "wow everyone is so shitty to refugees here, maybe the shadow druids were right, this city should be razed to the ground" like my GUY. Your Grove that you led did all the same fucking shit. What are you talking about. Shadow druids would just do all this harder. The fuck are you saying to me.

I don't think there's a way to slap him and point that out?!?

All that said, Trelle could not handle the shit happening in that game. It is Too Much. There were very fucked up things in CH but Rodrigo wouldn't go "there" and definitely wouldn't linger there if he did. She is not built for that. She has fucked up things in her past but there's ways of handling those things in the delivery and part of that is not making it Everything Is This and It is Constant. Like the ratio of Clown Business to Worst Thing You've Ever Heard is different.

That's a big difference between bg3 and an actual dnd game is that the DM can feel out what the players want and adjust. If your DM is good, they are constantly tweaking to make the experience as fun as possible for the group. Sometimes that means your players want more fucked up stuff and less clown, sometimes it's the opposite. Sometimes what they want differs from day to day. Like "ok everyone wants to go shopping, it's shopping day" and sometimes it's "everyone is going to go nuts if they don't fix what's happening".

This all sounds like it's a bad game. It's not. It's a masterpiece of game making and writing. But it's demanding.

NOT TMI ANSWER:

if I "stayed true to the character" trelle would fuck up so bad, she would not be able to beat the beegees, that girl would not survive that experience even if she did somehow complete the bigger goal. Obliterated. Done-zo.

#bg3 #bg3 spoilers #bg3 meta #Halsin #ptsd #depression #night terrors #trauma #mental health #dnd #trelle #trelle surestep #critical hit

[sexisdisgusting]

as i was writting i ended up getting a little tmi and wow I actually told you my secrets bc i have never been open about this 😭 so tw // rape, lesbophobia, mysogyny, biphobia maybe? not sure.

hihi! i have a sort of strange question... do you perhaps have any insight about distinguishing between being nervous bc you're scared of men and being nervous bc you're into one 🧍🏻‍♀️?

I've been questioning my sexuality since i got a crush on this woman because the way i feel about her is like stg i never experienced with any man... so i kinda know the answer to that question but i also don't? because i have a hard time interpreting my feelings and im scared im just lying to myself. specially bc i have fantasised about men a lot throughout my life, in an obsessive and harmful way too. it was never about the man in it, it wasn't his body, it was how i could be worth a man's attention if only in my head, i could be the prettiest woman, have my worth. i had to "teach" myself to be ok with dick, bc being het is the normal way, the only way, I've been taught. and i think that contributed to every fantasy being uhm rape, i just couldn't imagine myself being into it bc i know i wouldn't do it, i wouldn't have sex with a man I wouldn't be into it. (🤮🤢 looking back this is all so yuck ew im sorry).

it doesn't help that i have a sort of low libido and am very closed off, so i don't have any experience. i have never been into the male physique (though i certainly tried to), and im pleased with the female physique but it isn't an intense feeling like so many people describe it to be.

so im so confused! is my crush on her the real deal and every other crush i had fake bc i thought it was what a crush was supposed to be ? in the sense that ok im a girl feeling stg for a boy so it MUST be a crush right?! even though i never wanted anything besides friendship... no kissing, no hand holding, no intimacy... but i do want those things with her...

so i get back to my initial question... getting nervous or disgusted or feeling nothing seeing a shirtless man, like specifically shirtless or half naked (ew if his dick is even emphasized through the boxers like im seriously disgusted)... what is the shortness of breath, do you know ?! i feel so stupid asking this but it genuinely makes no sense to me 😭.

specially considering that a lot of het women say they're disgusted by men's bodies? am i just another one, but bisexual?!

feel free to ignore this ! im not even sure you're the right person to ask but you're so sweet answering messages so 🥹🩷 thank you for reading (or not if the tws made u not want to <3)

i am so sorry it took me so long to get back to you, sweetheart! never would i ignore one of my dear anonitas, i love you soooo much

im so sorry about everything youve been through, and thank you so much for entrusting me with your secrets !!!

i dont have much experience with comphet, but i do have experience with performing for the male gaze, and its a truly alienating experience especially when youre unsure if youre even attracted to them, or not

it, like you said for many can become maddening and obsessive at times and can really make you confused as to who you are

i dont want to dictate your sexuality, but it does sound to me that youre more woman-leaning in your attraction, and the male attraction you explain seems to be comphet

i wish i could give you a better answer, but i really do wish nothing but the best for you, my love, and thank you for reaching out to me <3

id be happy if someone could hop in the replies with more experience and help our anonita out!

#asks #anon asks

[silasbug]

dream log Nr. -003

03/06/2022 (extracted from a chat, unstructured)

hade: (PMSing really hard since the previous night)

nah I think the dream drained me of my pissy mood lol

I eventually got so annoyed at myself in the dream because i realized i was PMSing

"why am I acting like a total bitch?!"

sheesh, it was exhausting

 .

Tuffi:

lol

that's kinda cool though

reflecting in a dream

 .

hade:

definitely

it was really interesting

and then I made people drink piss

now that was weird, dont ask

I dont want to think about it

it ended in people puking

 .

Tuffi:

uugh

why would you make people drink that LOL

what did they do to you? lmao

 .

hade:

so at first we were at an aquaintances place to play boardgames (So SO, I and them) and then an old classmate that sorta bullied me was also there (his name was Dominik from Quebec), the whole time I was so pissy and annoyed it was really unpleasant

so I realize why I am annoyed and go "UGH guys I'm so sorry I'm so pissy I'm on my Period and PMSing really hard" and it's chill but awkward because TMI but I wanted to apologize

something else in between I forgot

so we end up going to a bar but the dude is now a girl called Julia I think

 .

Tuffi:

the dude being dominik? he turned into julia?

 .

hade:

yes, he turned into a short skinny girl with long thick curly hair

looked like a coworker of mine tbh, but not the same name

anyways SO and Julia go to wait at the table while the aquaintance (Rebecca) and I go to get drinks at the bar

this dude comes up to us and rages about how someone he knew tried to sell them piss as beer and how it was almost indistinguishable but so shitty etc, or Rebecca tells me about a dude telling her this

so she gets her drink and goes to the table while I get the other 3 drinks

I order a radler for myself but I think like "I could save some money, and if it tastes the same?? who'll notice??"

so I ask for two empty glasses..

an.d go to the bathroom..

yeah idk what I smoked before I went to bed ok

 .

Tuffi:

new kink revealed?

 .

hade:

absolutely not

so I return to the table with two mugs of warm piss and my radler

sorry im trying not to cry laughing on the bus

god im getting looks

 .

Tuffi:

that sentence alone is gold, like

a golden shower

 .

hade:

one sec im almost off

 .

Tuffi:

sure, have fun getting off

 .

hade:

wow

ok anyways I plop the drinks down in front of them, hoping they wont notice

and they take a few swigs

at first they dont notice

then SO sticks his pinky finger in to taste it again

and the takes another smaller swig

and then they make a face

and suddenly start heaving

and make a run for the bathroom

and they puke their guts out

sheesh

and thats how I made people drink my piss in my dream

 .

Tuffi:

that's amazing

 .

hade:

I also just remembered the dream that came in between which was my mom shoplifting

god tonight was weird

#dream log #this was a wild one lmao #retrospective dreams

[solskens]

can i PLEASE get to kiss a girl soon

#me: still had hickeys/bite marks on me from making out with a girl #me: ..... i Want A Kiss #let me live okay also idk how to fucking initiate a kiss i almost got an anxiety attack #the first time a girl tried to kiss me after my breakup so i um. i Left. okay. #ANYWAYS TMI FOR THE INTERNET #i just want to kiiiiiss okay n i have some dates planned but they r like in so long timeeee n idk if they r date dates or lesbian hangouts #n anyways me? initiating a kiss? without freaking out? would love to see that happen wow #also do not read this as the can i PLEASE get a waffle vine not what i meant ok

[yanderecandystore]

Hey, I love your work alot you're an incredibly skilled writer and always look forward to seeing your notification pop up! Is it ok if I request Adrien pinning a male reader down while they're alone?

A Adrien solo headcanon? How fun, boo!

Sure thing.

Sorry boo, even if I really liked your idea I've been having a lot of headaches (sorry if it's tmi, but: Periods fuckin sucks-).

I hope you don't mind if I redo your ask another time, probably a better one shot than- Whatever the hell I was thinking when writing this XD

TW/Tags: bullying but like- That's no surprise lol- // mentions of past encounters // perhaps mutual simping? // short hc, sorry about that boo ;-; // Terrible quality for an headcanon

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

Sorry I don't have a title- [Yandere!Bully OC (Adrien) x M!Reader - Headcanon]:

You have been running around this place for quite some time now, Amaryllis Academy is quite big after all.

You suspected that someone like him would not have enough stamina to continue pursuing you like this. And the truth is that he didn't have enough of an athletic build to hold it for so long, he just changed his strategy.

You also weren't necessarily interested in exercising everyday, you could say that maybe you two have the same amount of stamina, the difference being that you decided to waste it all while trying to run from him- And he decided to plan a way to corner you.

No one can blame you for falling so easily to that, but let's be honest- You should have seen this coming the moment he stopped chasing you and started coming forward very calmly.

"Why didn't I stop running as well?" You thought out loud now that you find yourself in a no ways out situation, great, just great.

You were choking on your own air- Completely out of breath having a hard time bringing more oxygen to your lungs. You take a look back and notice who was walking in- Wow, how surprising.

"- Ugh, come on-" you were not really pissed off, or surprised, or even scared anymore, you were just tired of having to run from this guy. One would think that someone like him isn't capable of hurting a single fly, but those who doubted him would end up having a big wake up call- Just like you did.

Do you remember now? It was in a similar situation like this- You were cornered, out of breath, your legs were giving up and couldn't even fight anymore. The only difference from that moment to now was that there wasn't anyone else here, except you two.

No audience this time, this was the backstage and you two were the actors getting their costumes out. At least that's how he saw it, to you it was just like any other time he would bully you. How wrong were you to think that.

He didn't make any attempts at running at you, and as you tried to help yourself on the walls beside you, he clapped at your latest performance.

"- Bravo, Are you happy with yourself now? That you managed to make a fool out of yourself?" His voice wasn't as bored as he usually was, it sounded filled with sarcasm with a hint of true anger in it.

Despite that, you weren't sure what he was talking about. I mean- You know what happened, but you can't recall a single moment where you have made him so pissed off.

"- You tried your hardest to get me to this point, and congratulations- You did it-" Adrien was holding himself from lashing out as much he could, he was feeling humiliated and the fact you're so unaware as to way makes him want to choke you. Put his arms around your neck and force you to at least look at him when he is talking with you.

You tried to remember what could have possibly made him so desperate to get back at you, and as you do, you can feel your blood pulsating inside your skull- You can recall one incident that happened yesterday.

Yesterday, you were avoiding Adrien as best as you could, while also trying to make new friends that could help you get away from him for a bit longer. You started talking with a shy girl in your class, you thought that it would be easier to get to know someone who is mostly alone all the time then going straight to the popular crowd- Who would absolutely dismiss you or even do worse things considering Adrien's influence over them.

You started talking to a girl you thought to be an outcast just like yourself, maybe you two could have been friends- But that didn't last too long after you realized exactly why she would be so distant from other people, apparently she was one of those who were… A little too into other people's relationships, more specifically your relationship with Adrien.

She only started talking with you because of how much time you spent with Adrien, how suspicious it is for someone like him to be so clingy towards you. Her endless nagging was horrible but even worse was how she had planted the idea in her head that you two have been dating or something- You tried arguing that Adrien has done nothing but bullying you and distancing yourself from others, but she couldn't really listen to you, or even care enough to try.

You were heavily reconsidering your options, after all it didn't seem like you two would really work out together- But before you considered ditching her, Adrien had confronted you about walking around with her.

He was acting like his usual bratty self, keeping himself calm and still holding that stern look in his face, but the actual contents of his speech were a bit concerning- It sounded like he was really jealous of you hanging out with a "creep like her", as he said.

You tried calming him down to not create a bigger scene, but your new "friend" had pushed Adrien to end up bumping on you, which only made the situation to escalate.

Adrien took this whole thing as a plan you both created to make himself seem like a fool, this was just an attempt to get his attention and he fell for it- He got red and started yelling at you two, his threats sounding like barks.

That's why he was chasing you today, at least that's why you thought so- Although the truth was a bit deeper than that, dearest. That whole event didn't slip through his mind even when he was asleep, he dreamed about the incident- Although with a thin veil of something a bit… Uncalled for in his opinion.

In Adrien's head, the accident made it look like he was hugging you, which made him get flustered and panicky. He had a dream about the whole scene happening again, but without your friend and without any of the other students, it was very pathetic of him to imagine a scenario where you would be there for him, to get him when he falls, how wishful.

He blames you for such a dream, just as if he would blame you if he ever got a dream about you cheating on him- Regardless of how your actual relationship is currently.

His own delusions and anxious thoughts would get the best of him, and that's why you're in this exact situation- Feeling out of breath with no one to save you from Adrien.

You felt yourself almost lose your balance and almost hit your face in the concrete, but thanks to Adrien slamming your back against the wall you didn't need to scratch your face, at least that's a positive.

You didn't pay much attention to what he was saying, you were just kinda pissed off of having to deal with this brat's bs everyday. Although, you're very aware that Adrien can be a bit more than just a brat, sometimes you have to remind yourself of that- It wouldn't be pretty to make him mad.

Bullying you, hating you, liking you, loving you- All are so difficult to manage everyday, it's too much work for someone like him. It's exhausting overthinking about you every day.

"- …. Sigh- You're very annoying, very, very annoying…." all that anger that was previously in his voice has almost gone away, being slowly replaced with tiredness. Key word being "almost", he was tired but not over his own jealousy yet.

You didn't want to provoke him considering how, well- Dangerous this situation is, or could be if you do the wrong thing. It's a 50/50 chance of you finding a way to comfort him without him lashing out once again. Then again, nothing can prevent him from getting the wrong idea of your actions, so choose wisely your next move, dearest.

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

#yandere #sheep stuff #sheep's stuff #yandere oc #yandere bully #yandere oc x reader #yandere oc headcanon #yandere bully x reader #yandere bully x male reader #male reader #special delivery headcanons #special delivery request

[khaleesiofalicante]

Hei! Jeg leser endelig dette! Og jeg er så glad for at du er ferdig med rapporten!💙💚

"The angel himself. The motherfucker." Lexi!!

Raziel is a bro and I'm laughing my ass off😂

David really be an angel🥺💙💙

“Well, I could have looked like a blonde, white girl,” Raziel suggested. “But I thought you’d find that a little distracting.” (THE WAY I LAUGHED AT THIS 😂😂😂 He's not wrong tho...)

HES BEEN LIVING IN HER FOR 10 YEARS??? WTF?? But it makes sense tho

"My girlfriend could have died!” “Uh,” Raziel said. “I thought y’all broke up?” “Raziel, you are on thin fucking ice right now.” (dont tease with my heronstairs feelings bitch🔪🔪)

"I kinda messed up.” Yeah, no shit!!!

He's got a point... But really??

You idiot shit!! Even I know that!!!

“Go to therapy, goddamn,” I firmly support this.

Ok, now the Belial thing makes sense

“If I die,” Raziel said. “You will all die with me" (I already knew that but HOLY SHIT)

Transmissomancy really is strong..

Now I undestand the Selena's power thing!!

Raziel said homophobia is a sin everybody!!!!

“Yo, we are responsible for overseeing the entire universe,” Raziel said incredulously. “Do you really think we have time to bother about who is sleeping with whom?” (I will print this and wave it at the family dinner 💙)

“Besides, it’s not that angels are entirely…you know,” Raziel grinned. “My brother Gabriel is kinda fruity.” (I shit you not, I fell off my bed laughing at this 😂😂😂)

OMG it all makes sense now!!

You are all clowns here dudes..

You dont know shit Raziel!!

I mean... They are princes of hell?? They are obviously planing something?!?!

“I didn’t give her the rune,”  Wtf??

I NEED ANSWERS!!

WOW. THIS. WOW. WHAT? I'M SPEECHLESS.

“I was just telling Rafe we are going to find him soon and bring him back.” 💙💙💙!!

“It doesn’t matter if he is God himself,” Honeslty I'm a little scared of them in the good way

I dont know if I like this promise...

I'm with Max in this one. Because Magnus would absolutely do everything he can to get David back even if it kills him and NO!

Also I'm with him with the apology thing 😂

"I will drag his ass out of Edom if I have to do it myself.” THATS MY CONSUL!!

Dont tell me they wont believe Lexi!!

Oh, never mind. They did. THANKS MAGNUS!!

"Two dreams," Magnus whispered, mostly to himself. "Two battles." (OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, DOES THIS MEAN CLARY AND MAGNUS' DREAMS??)

I'm so glad she told them!! No miscommunication!

“All of this happened…technically…because of Raziel?” Yeah, basically...

The Idris Rune!! The dots are connecting!!!

Oh shit, Clary must feel terrible 🥺🥺

Uh,” Simon replied. “I kinda summoned Archangel Michael and bribed him to give it to me." “You know,” Emma whistled. “Sometimes I forget how fucking cool you guys are.” (yes they are😎😎)

I will repeat this until I die. Gigi is a godness. She has solve half their shit!!

YESS, let Max go jfc!!

TMI GANG 💙💙

Julian is still scary...

YESS. Tmi gang are THAT bitches😎😎😎

Jace and Lexi fighting over Cortana>>>

“I don’t need an oath to make stupid decisions,” Magnus pointed out. “I’m completely capable of doing that on my own.” (tsc characters: a summary)

Anjali!!!! 🥺💙🥺💙🥺

"I see you, Alec told his son quietly. I see what you see in her" OK, but the parallels with "I see your heart, and why she stole it" WOW. Masterpiece. Talented. Brilliant-

I live for Alec and Anjali interactions!!

Roman is the cutest. I rest my case 💙💙

The way Gigi's brain work is just awesome!!

Love those law breaking lil shits with my life 🥺💜💙

“But I was raised by the gays!” Roman pointed out. “Are you sure that doesn’t help with my case?” (OMG I CANT WITH HIM 🤣😂)

Sister Emilia is a queen. Two queens in a room is just too much for me!!!

Omg they figured the ingredients!!!

"They are all different,” HOLY SHIT.

OMG IT MAKES TOTAL SENSE!! Now they just need the ingredients for two princes of hell🙂🔫

The way I get happy with every David POV 💙💙

“Look at this. Remember I was here. Remember I love you. Remember I am coming back.” MAVID SUPREMACY!!!!

David really said ✨healthy relationship✨

“Love belongs among fools, David Beauchamp.” “Well,” David said. “Then I am dumb as fuck (first of all, I LOVE WHEN THE TITLE IS MENTIONED I JUST JDBDKJSOS. Second, I love David<3)

“I keep reaching out inside you. I try to find something. But there is nothing. There is nothing for me to feed on. You have nothing for me to offer.” BECAUSE HE IS DAVID AND WE LOVE HIM. HE IS AN ANGEL

“I’m not abnormal,” David said in a ridiculous tone. “I go to therapy. Maybe you should try that sometime.” (Everyone there should, honestly)

“I asked Max why he loves you. But I suppose the answer is rather obvious. Darkness does look for the light.” DONT TRY ME WITH MAVID SLANG🔪

"The love he had for Max was impossible." My son is such a simp 💙💙😂

“I’ll admit I don’t know much about the boy. I’m afraid his parents never let me babysit,” And why would that be I wonder....

“Oh, David. Haven’t you heard?” Asmodeus grinned. “All the stories are true." (bitch no)

"And even after all these years, and even after all that therapy, David flinched at the voice." I have a pen right here and I'm in the mood to kill someone🙂

Coraline!!!

“Very good, mon ange!” OMG OMG OMG OMG

That man makes me sick because it also happens irl and I just...

“Coraline Moreau,” Asmodeus shook his head and passed David a leaflet. “She has made quite a name for herself, you know.” (wtf???)

Jia knew!!!

"And the vision disappeared. Just like Coraline had, all those years ago." I.... I have so many feelings....

But there was no pain. Only peace. “Thank you,” (Ha! Fuck you Asmodeus!!)

“There was only one monster in that story,” David said. “And it wasn’t her.” (David is simply beautiful and amazing and I'm so happy he realized that!!) (I wouldn’t have had that same judgment and first tbh)

CLACE RIGHTS!! Fuck you again Asmodeus!!

Dont you dare mess with Chopin!!

“I don’t like shitty fathers.” Ngl, that have me chills...

They are walking into a trap?? That makes sense, why am I surprised???

Wow. That chapter left me speachless. I love it 💙 In other news, I hate chemistry :)

Ha det! Ser deg snart! Hvil også litt fordi jeg vet ikke hvordan du klarer å skrive så mange sider😂

ilysm.

reading your thoughts give me the same out of serotonin my stories give you.

ilysm.

actual footage of me reading your reactions after each chapter:

#lbaf #noah boo thang #and i didnt guess the language right oop #and yeah idk how i wrote so much either bro some sorcery

[takerfoxx]

So long as I'm getting caught up on all my stuff, here's the next installment of the Walpurgis Nights girls watch The Rebellion Story, this time stretching from Homura shooting herself in the head to her talk with Sayaka the vague-poster!

Reminder:

G=Gretchen

H=Homulilly

Op=Ophelia

Ok=Oktavia

Ca=Candeloro/Mami

Ch=Charlotte

...

=still screaming=

G: Turn it off, TURN IT OFF!

Ok, panicking: I got it, I got it! Off!

=TV winks out=

Ch: Sweet Christ!

=long pause, and then Gretchen gets up and runs off. Homulilly quickly follows=

Ch: This was a mistake.

Op: What. The fuck?

Ca: I should have known. I should have known it would go this way.

Ch: Candy, there’s no way you could have-

Ca: No! There was! I knew how bad it could get! I knew how far we could have fallen! I shouldn’t have let you guys see any of this.

Ok: It’s not your fault.

Ca: I still should have known. I should have at least screened this!

Ch: Yeah, one of us probably should have.

=another long pause=

Ok: So, uh, are we, like, done?

=suddenly Gretchen reenters the room, followed by Homulilly. They silently return to their seats=

G: Okay. Play it.

Op: Gretch, are you sure?

G: I need to know. I need to know what happens to her. I need to know if we turn out okay. Play it.

=everyone exchanges uncomfortable glances, and then look to Homulilly, who slowly nods=

Ok: Okay, if you say so…

Op: We’d better ease it with the commentary. I mean, this isn’t something we can-

G: No! Please, no. The talking…and the jokes…well, it makes it easier.

Op: Sure.

Ch: It’ll be kind of hard to find anything funny about this.

Ca: We can try to do what we can.

=they start the movie, and silently watch as Homura falls in slow motion, blood and brains spewing out. And then…=

Op: Wait, hold up! How is she still moving?

Ca: As I said, something like that won’t kill her. You would need to destroy her soul gem.

Op: So she can straight up just blow her own head off and walk it off?

Ca: So long as the act of healing didn’t use up too much magic, yes.

H: Okay, but why? Why would I do something like that?

Ca: Let’s find out.

…

Ok: Uh…Ooooh.

H: Oh. Really?

G: What’s going on?

H: I couldn’t get rid of the ribbon on my ankle. Every time I tried to shoot it off, Mami would just grow it back. So I tried shocking her so badly that she wouldn’t think to regenerate the ribbon long enough for her to be caught in the time-stop.

Op: By shooting yourself in the head?!

H: Clearly, I have a considerable amount of emotional issues.

Ch: You know, it’s really starting to concern me how you keep referring to her as yourself just now.

H: I apologize. I will try to differentiate between my alternate selves.

Ok: Oh great, now I’ve gone cross-eyed.

…

Ch: So…this is really uncomfortable. Again.

G: Is she going to shoot Cand-I mean, Mami?

Ca: I mean, there’s clearly a moral struggle.

H: Well. At least I didn’t turn out as a complete sociopath.

Ok: This is seriously gross. Can we just skip this part?

Ca: No.

Ok: But-

Ca: No.

Ok: Okay.

…

Op: In the leg. Well, I guess that’s not as-

Ok: HOLY!

G: What’s happening? What’s going on?

Op: Sweet flames, she’s…a ribbon monster? The fuck?

=pause, and then Charlotte starts laughing hard while Candeloro just sighs=

Ok: Charlotte! Explain! Now!

Ch: She did it! She actually did it!

Ok: Did what?!

Ch: You’ll see!

H: Wow, I am…I mean, she is just all tied up now.

G: Wait, Mami’s there? But I thought…then what was…

Ca: Oh, good grief.

Ok: Wait. Wait a second, you can clone yourself?!

Ca: It’s…not so much a clone as it is a puppet.

Ok: Since when could you do that?!

Ca: Um, well, I had figured it out a short time before our, um, deaths. I was training with Kyo…with Ophelia, and we were practicing with her illusion magic. You know, the duplicates?

Op: Uh-huh.

Ca: Well, she suggested that perhaps I could do something similar with my ribbons, since I could use my ribbons to form other objects. And, well…it worked.

Op: Ooooh. Okay, that’s actually kind of awesome.

H: I was fighting a copy the whole time?! How is that fair?

Ch: You can literally freeze time!

H: Hey, wait. How do you know that she could do that, Charlotte?

Ch: How do you think?

Ca: Like we said: our therapist suggested building positive associations around my change. We had to get creative.

Op: Oh, come on, that’s not fair!

Ok: Wait, you were the one betting on her!

Op: I’m not talking about that! When I do my duplicate trick all I can do with them is give Tavi a show! It’s not like she can touch any of them!

Ok: Babe. Relax. It’s honestly fine.

Op: All I’m saying I should be able to give you a lap dance while the striptease is going on.

G: TMI! TMI!

Ch: You, uh, do know that you can give her the lap dance and let your illusions handle the striptease, right?

Op: Do you know how hard it is to handle two kinds of dancing at the same time when you’re horny?

G: Please, I am begging you to stop!

…

Ch: So…I think someone owes me and Fee-Fee some talents.

Ok: Fight’s not over yet!

Ch: It clearly is…

G: You don’t know that! Maybe Homura will drop a hand-grenade to blow the ribbons up! Or maybe Kyoko will come to save her.

Op: Look, if other-me tags in, that’s an automatic forfeit. This is supposed to be one-on-one, and that clone trick is stretching things as it is.

H: Wait, wait, shut up. Wraiths? What are wraiths?

Ok: Dunno.

Ch: Did we miss something? I get that that nightmares replaced the witches, but what are wraiths?

G: Maybe…after I erased witches, wraiths are what replaced them!

Op: We should’ve just watched the damn show first.

Ch: Do you really think it’ll make things make more sense?

Op: Probably not, but at least we’d know about half of these names!

Ch: Jesus Christ, the fuck is that?

Ok: The sky wants to eat that giant walnut, apparently.

Ch: I can see that, but what does it mean?!

G: I think that’s an eye, actually.

Ok: An eye with teeth.

Ch: None of that answers any of my questions.

Op: Nope, this would still be just as weird even if we watched the show.

…

Ch: And here comes the rescue! Via…fire extinguisher for some reason. Sorry girls, Mami takes this.

Ok: Fine, fine. Thanks a lot, Homulilly.

H: Not my fault. None of us knew about the duplicate thing. I had her beat until then.

Ok: Wait, is that a sword?

Op: Guess it ain’t me with the steel chair, then!

G: Well, of course not. It’s a sword.

Op: That’s not…never mind.

Ok: It’s me! I’m coming in to save you!

H: I’m touched. But…why?

Ok: Because I had fifty talents riding on you, and you let me down.

H: Oh, don’t start.

Op: Wait. That ain’t your voice, Tavi.

Ok: Who else has a sword?!

G: Um, who is that?

Ch: Some kind of kid. Candy, do you recognize her back from before?

Ca: No, I really don’t…

Op: Wait, BEBE?!

Ch: Excuse me?!

H: Um…this is…a turn.

Ca: Don’t look at me, I’m as bewildered as you are.

Ch: Oh, so first I’m a creepy idiot doll, and now I’m a fucking child?!

Op: What is this, some kind of alternate universe bullshit?

Ok: I mean, basically. Uh, you okay over there, Charlotte.

Ch: Nope!

Ok: Wanna take a break?

Ch: Yes!

…

=everyone returns after half-an-hour=

Ch: I think I’ve figured it out.

H: Oh?

Ch: Butterfly effect. Like, okay, in this universe, Madoka somehow erased all witches, right? I mean, made it so magical girls don’t turn into witches anymore, right? And did it all through history, right?

H: Presumably.

Ch: So that means that there has to be major repercussions! Like, like, this girl doesn’t turn into a witch fifty years ago, so she doesn’t eat some random passerby, and that rando goes and marries someone that would have married someone else in the original timeline, so they have a completely different set of kids, so the kids they would have had originally don’t get born! So somewhere down the line, things got all screwy and I ended up being born a few years later!

G: Wow, that actually makes a lot of sense.

Op: I guess we’re all super-lucky that we got born at all. And that the rest of us ended up more-or-less the same. Um, no offense.

Ch: Right. That’s all it is. Different timeline, things happened differently, and I’m a little girl in this world. That’s it.

Ok: So…are you okay with this then?

Ch: Oh, absolutely not! But I can at least deal with it now!

Op: Bet’cha anything that good ol’ Bebe here still has a major crush on Mami.

Ch: Oh, God! Don’t even go there!

Op: I’m just sayin’…

Ca: Ophelia…

Op: Stopping, stopping.

H: Shall we continue?

Ch: Yeah, I guess. I’m gonna need major therapy after all this is over, though.

G: We all will.

…

Ok: Okay, I know this is probably a bad time to point this out, but Sayaka has style!

Op: I mean, you’re not wrong. Look at you, being all effortlessly cool! Not that you aren’t already.

Ok: Nice save there.

Ch: Haha, Sayaka’s got it right! Taking on Mami was a dumb idea. Speaking of which…

Ok: Oh, come on! That clone trick was dirty and you know it!

Ch: Oh, I’m sorry. Are you upset that she so happened to have something that counters Homura’s extremely unfair timestop power?

Op: She’s got a point. A bet’s a bet.

G: All right, I guess it’s official. Mami won.

=Candeloro smirks=

H; You don’t have to be all smug about it.

Ca: True. I don’t.

…

G: Wait…

Op: So, what, Sayaka knows what’s going on?

Ok: Of course I do! I mean, I’m the brains of the bunch!

=Homulilly coughs=

Ok: I heard that.

H: I didn’t say anything.

Ch: Well, finally some exposition!

G: I do sort of wish that she’d just tell Homura what is going on without being so vague about it.

Ok: Look, I’ve been pretty much on the wayside this whole movie. Let me have my monologue.

Ch: What’s she getting at though?

H: Oh.

Ch: Huh?

H: I think…Never mind.

G: What is it?

H: I just had sort of a realization, but I’d rather not say it now.

Op: Eh?

H: Hang on. Let’s just watch a bit more.

…

Op: Jesus, Tavi! No need to show Homura up like that!

Ok: Let! Me! Have! This!

Ch: That was pretty cool, though. Shwing! Stopped her cold!

G: Wait, so one of us is the…

=voice trails off=

G: Is it me?

H: Um…

Op: Oh.

Ok: Oh.

Ch: What? Oh, okay. I get it now.

Ca: I sort of put it together too.

G: What? What are…Oh.

=everyone looks at Homulilly=

H: Well, it only makes sense. I guess.

Ch: You don’t seem all that upset about it.

H: Well, at least I get to become my best self in this movie.

G: But…how though? I thought I erased witches or whatever!

Ok: Let’s find out.

Ch: If your other self can ever get to the point.

Ok: Shhh…

…

Ca: Wait, I’m the witch? Is that what she’s implying?

Ch: Pretty sure that’s just a red herring.

Ok: You know, it’s nice that Sayaka is actually being all sympathetic toward witches. I mean, it’s kind of fucked up, isn’t it? That even the magical girls that know the score still hunt down witches instead of trying to help them.

G: I mean, it can’t really be helped, can it?

Ok: I know, I just like that I’m saying it.

G: The Law of Cycles? What’s that?

Op: Probably whatever trippy business you replaced the witch stuff with.

H: Oh, now I’m finally just saying it out loud! Madoka erased witches. Took us long enough to get to that point.

Op: Wait, sacrificed herself? Only Homura remembers her? What?

Ch: Pretty sure this was all explained in the show.

Op: Well, that’s what we get for watching this first. Should we go back and-

Everyone: No.

Op: Cool.

…

Op: Oh, freaky!

Ok: Wait, so I’m the witch now?

Ch: Could mean that in this timeline you turned into a witch before Madoka did her un-witching…thing.

Ca: That is what you looked like. Right before you became one with Charlotte, I mean.

Ch: Er…

Ok: Phrasing…

Ca: Oh, for Heaven’s sake. It is literally what happened. You turned into a witch while we were fighting Charlotte, and then the two of you fused. Then I became a witch and fused with that witch. And then Ophelia became a witch and we all fused together.

Ok: Yeah, but the way you said it…

…

H: Where’d she go?

Ok: Clumsy? You have the gall to call me clumsy? Who just saved who’s ass, just now!

H: Cut me some slack, it’s been a long evening.

Ch: Y’know you still got blood and brains all over your cheek, right?

H: I am certain that Homura does not care.

Op: I am certain that Homura is about to blow the brains out of the first punk-ass that looks at her wrong right about now.

Ok: Headshots for everybody!

H: Except Madoka.

Ok: Except Madoka. She can be the token un-brain-slushee.

G: Gee. Thanks.

Ca: I’d like to just point out that Homura came very close to turning me into a brain-slushee, but changed her mind.

Op: I doubt she’ll let you off so easy a second time.

Ch: Easy. Hey, may I remind you who won that fight?

H: You’re not going to let that go, are you?

Op: Tell yah what. Losing party treats the winners to dinner at the Tradewinds. Fair?

H: Fair.

Ch: Seriously? With the prices they have down there it’ll be cheaper just to cough up the fifty talents.

G: Yeah, but onion volcanoes!

Ch: Hard to argue with that logic.

Ok: So…on a scale of one to ten, how badly is Homura going to flip out when she realized that she’s the witch.

H: I will accept nothing less than a massacre.

Ok: Cool. Just so long as it’s not of us.

Op: I don’t know. The way this movie is going I wouldn’t be surprised if this turned into a straight-up snuff film.

#WN Rebellion MST

[ohmysparkle]

Dearly beloved Sparkle, what is it you write?

Absolute nonsense.

Stories - very plot driven, actually developed stories. The work I write here will mostly feature male idols. Some of the things I write do not focus on the featured idol because that’s not the point of my writing. I don’t really like to say I write “for” NCT and Stray Kids because they are not the reason I write or what I’m writing for. I like to write funky stories and these are my little muses that I fold in according to what I want, but most of the time my stories I write about them.

Smut - ok I write lots of this. Guilty as charged. Female reader, because I am a woman and I want to write about the experiences I want to immerse in, based on my previous experiences and my fantasies, including all the things I am able to associate with my anatomy. I draw heavily on things I can relate to/experience, and I don’t want to misrepresent anything that I have no knowledge of.

I make stupid cat edits sometimes too.

Oh, great and beloved Mistress Sparkle, what kind of smut do you write?

I write involving several tropes and elements. I like to have lots of setting to any sort of sex scene, and sex isn't just about actions, as many people write. I like reasoning and justifying, delving deep into why people like certain things, why kinks are gratifying and fulfilling. The things we enjoy in sex aren’t just because they feel good. The most rewarding sexual practices answer to things that are fundamentally psychological. Degradation isn’t hot “just because”, getting choked and spanked doesn’t actually feel good as a stand alone activity - so why do they feel good in certain sexual scenarios?

Most people do things just on the surface, don’t really explore themselves and their feelings, or those of their partner. We live in a superficial world and never question the why’s and the significance of things. The majority of the smut I read is very exploitative, and replicates tropes because (and this is evident in the way it’s written) the writer has been told that X or Y trope or kink is good and they ‘should’ represent it as the peak of sex.

Sex is very poorly represented in this circle, and its always boiled down to binary sub/dom dynamics, aaaand that’s not what happens in the real world nor what I think is most enjoyable in fantasies. Sure, power dynamics are there, but it doesn’t always have to be center stage, nor does it have to be a zero sum thing. It’s all very fluid and flexible, and people unfortunately learn about sex in a way that’s very odd to me. So I try to show different elements that are realistically represented, with all of those emotional components that show us why something feels oh so good.

I primarily enjoy soft femdom. And no, contrary to what you’ve read, the end goal of femdom isn’t latex and whips and chains (even though that sounds great). I am comfortable with most kinks and practices, except those which are evidently immoral. I’m pretty open and I’m not going to act all puritanical and judge anyone.

However, I am very uncomfortable with scenarios where there would be a female insert in a very submissive role with harsh elements like bondage/restriction, impact play, and degradation. You can talk to me about it and we can talk about it in a conversation - but my issue comes with people expecting me to write this or demanding it. I don’t have to explain why, just refrain from doing so because I don’t like it.

Oh wise Sparkle, what groups/members do you like to incorporate in your writings?

For now, I’ve included NCT and Stray Kids. There are several members I like to include in certain things depending on the type of dynamic/scenario I can see them being compatible with. That means, I won’t write everything for everyone - except maybe Hyunjin because I could make all of my writings about my Mr. Sexy Spaghetti Man.

I won’t write for all members, especially not ones that are younger or that I don’t get creative vibes with.

Sparkle, why are you Sparkle?

Because the internet is where we have fun and I can’t be a cat in real life despite wanting to. But in all honesty, I think it’s cute and I don’t really want people to know of me as a person on here. I might have had some TMI slips here and there, like revealing my (formerly) very hot (pre-covid) face, but I don’t want anyone to know much about me here. There is only one person here who knows my name and it was an ACCIDENT.

Sparkle, can you tell us about yourself?

No.

Ok, maybe a little.

I’m in my early-mid-20s. I’m a former hot girl turned quarantine potato, honestly I used to be so hot. Enjoy your 21st year of life as it were the last because after that all of the hangovers and bad mistakes leave a scar on your soul and you’ll get wrinkly and less cool.

Other than my gorge k-boys I love all sorts of pop divas. I adore RuPaul’s Drag Race, cats, coffee (iced, bitter, and black, like my frigid heart), Britney Spears, history, economics, languages. I like nature stuff in general, plants, animals, things like kayaking and hiking when I’m not in potato mode.

My hobbies include crafts like sewing and embroidery, assembling miniature houses, watching freaky movies, finding cat memes, and crying.

I have a concerning obsession with horror films and zombies.

What kind of music does Sparkle listen to with her furry ears?

My music taste varies. It’s either the soundtrack of the life of an anti-war Woodstock hippie or a Studio 54 frequent Halstonette. 60s/70s/80s. I like R&B, soul, jazz (not that nyc white people elevator jazz, but the real jazz), disco, glam rock, classic rock, pop rock, whatever the hell you’d use to describe David Bowie and his unicorn space trips, that stuff Prince did that probably made lots of babies, and Queen.

I adore pop divas - Britney above all. I really like the Weeknd too.

K-pop isn’t what I listen to the most and there are veeeery few songs that I listen to and go “omg wow”. I actually enjoy girl groups more than boy groups.

Precious Sparkle, do you take requests?

Sort of/not really. Feel free to drop an idea/request and I’ll elaborate on it if it’s something I’d like to write. I won’t write everything. I also don’t like receiving a bullet list of steps to follow and what to include that are followed up by “when are you going to do my request?”.

Some of my series have been a result of requests, or I answer them as minifics. Maybe I’ll tweak some of the things you include.

That’s all folks.

#about sparkle the cat

[smutty-ki113r]

yes yes i am very sure that Ben loves u ! he snatched my phone out of my hand to look at the picture. I am almost certain he was blushing ( •̀ ω •́ )✧ hehe. he told me to tell u that u r gorgeous <3

I totally get what u said abt having trouble with believing love, red! I also have trouble believing that anybody could love me! Trauma yes u r right ig lmao

ALSO WTF HOW R U SO PRETTY?! MIGHT SNATCH U FROM BEN NGL 😘💕

oh yeah Ben completed the heart like... I wish I could take pictures of him man :< but he did and he was grinning ear to ear.

Oh god I have like a full pdf file with backinfo of my oc's and I need to update it again...(it's been only a month-) so uh sharing all of it would be kinda a lot. so here is a lil info abt my oc's: 8 clownis :> and then we have 3 mythical creatures and 2 robots but i don't count the bots as oc's since they r mostly just gadgets. my clowns r; as I said; based on clowndolls I either bought, made or got gifted. the mythical creatures have powers, 2 of them r based of drawings I made and the third is based of my comfort stuffie :> i'll keep it at that for now

OKOK i defintely think if u tell Ben u have trouble sleeping he will either stay up with u or "help u out" haha.

It went great with toby 🥰 maybe a lil tmi BUT well my crevix felt abused- but I slept like a goddamn baby. I slept 8 hours yay!!!

sorry for answering a lil late...i got my period and felt horrible yesterday. the pain was ok but my dysphoria acted up again -.-

I feel a lot better today :>

-🃏

DID HE SEE ALL THE PICS? I posted more cause people were boosting my ego and BRO it’s so hard to heal from those things. Cause if people actually do want to be with me it’s like do I trust them? IDK for you but for me, people used to lie about being in love with me, so now I am suspicious. Also cause wow, there’s a lot of people out there why would you choose me? Im actually super insecure about myself LOL im trying to work on it!

HE COMPLETED THE HEART????????? DEAR LORD THATS ADORABLE———grinning ear to ear i could cry!! from happiness obviously—————- side note: question; i am not sure how things work over there HAHHAH, but if Ben can see the pics and the fics are like my anon messages (like this one) there too?? Like can he for example read this? Just completely random cause i literally have no clue how it works over there-. ALSO since your’e with Toby lucky bitch i could strangle you, with love cause i love you so much does he ever talk about masky? 🤨 Cause I remember you tellin me he’s quite reserved. Hmmm. LOL IM SO INVESTED IN THIS SHSH

Thats so impressive, you literally have clown oc’s from the dolls you make. 😮 Thats a different level of dedication. AND YOU DRAW//?? Imagine the talent. What kinds of powers do your mythical creatures have??? I LOVE IT!!! I dont have oc’s per say, i just have like a book im writing, but that’s different i think?? Cause i get so attached and like one of my protagonists i fucking- i cant even describe. But I wrote an entire piece on that. LOL LMK IF YOUD LIKE TO READ IT

If I ever got in an intimate situation with ben I would get so so sososososos insecure. Like im such a simp ofc yes, and AGH SEX but also like,,,HAHAHHAJHA I HAVE SO MANY CONCERNS WITH MY BODY- regardless. I am so fucking PROUD OF YOU! Look at you- getting good dick sleep. NEVER TMI ON THIS BLOG 😌

Bro, we are literally SYNCING UPPPPPPP, I got my PERIOD LIKE TWO DAYS AGO AGHHHH. But ive been having dysphoria too, and i completely understand. Remember that you are valid, and you are in fact NOT A GIRL, and you never have been, and you never will be. Its literally scientifically proven that non cis people’s brain are literally different- you will always be just a person in my eyes. Gender is shit, fuck gender, it’s literally made up.

I LOVE YOU!!! I wish i could crawl over the screen like ben or smtg and give u a hug.

#🚹 #♠️ #💬

[selfcareparker]

yesss the letter format 💝💓💘💖💞💕💖💞💓 (lovely anon)

my dearest aria (a hamilton reference lmao),

i’m home alone (bc i wanted the house alone to get my head together after my brothers were mean to me 🙃) and i’m so hype LMAO but i’m watching chloe x halle’s tiny desk concert and honestly just vibing. (this is so random) besides zendaya like they are my badass black women role models. my one accomplishment would be to learn to body roll like them LMAO

oh nevermind i can’t have anything nice, my dad just came home 🙃 WHAT A WAY TO START OFF THIS ASK WTFFF

i’m liking tfatws, the second episode was veryyy intense imo but WANDAVISION IS SO GOOD😭 i knew it was going to be my favorite from the really old trailer but it’s really good and i promise it’s not just sitcoms, girl especially cuz you’ll have all the episodes already out- we were having to wait every week😭 BUT ITS SO GOOD I PROMISE HDJSHDJSH lmao reading this i was like “i- the episodes aren’t an hour long” but i feel that, it’s hard for me to watch tfatws bc they are an hour long and i’m like 😐 but wandavision episodes are less than 30mins bc I KID YOU NOT they have the damn 10 MINUTE CREDITS DHDJSJ no i don’t think we’ve talked about this b4 lol but it all depends on the series for me. i binged love island uk in less than a week bc i was so invested and LITERALLY LOVE IT but uh those episodes are like an hour and a half, but say i was binging tfatws (it’s so hard to type that ohmigosh) i honestly would not be able to do it bc of the intensity (you may be like what intensity but if you’ve seen episode 2 by the time you’re reading this.......... isaiah and the scene afterwards is all i have to say, esp me being black it was so tough :/)

girl you’re fine, as long as you’ve experienced it once hahaha i think the reason why it’s so important to my family (this letter feels so personal and extreme HSJSJA IM SORRY) is bc my grandmother loved it and in my family i guess it’s just important to us lol like my mom and dad love it too and we have the literal VHS tapes LMAO, but it only came up recently cuz my youngest brother was watching lion guard HAHA and he wanted to see the originals :) and fun fact (unless you already know) but there’s a lion king part 2 and 1 1/2 and i have all three ON VHS HAHAHA but i love lion king 1 duh (the og) but part two’s music and love story..... is so good. anyway. 🦁

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING DURING THE WHOLE MOVIE THEATER ENCOUNTER THING HAHAHA AND WHEN SHE WAS SAYING AWKWARD I WAS LIKE WTF THE NOISE LMAOOOO i don’t think there’s a better way to describe that whole situation than ZKDHDJSHAJAJSHDJSNAHA. yeah. yeaaaa at the cinemas (i like the word cinema more than movies 🥰) here they have chips (fries), some have ice cream, nachos, drinks, hot dogs, the cinema we were at had pretzels and like BURGERS I WAS LIKE HUH OKAY and ya know obviously popcorn but i don’t know why the theaters (or cinemas) here do that, it started a long time ago though like yearsssss

PLEASE i have the longest movie watchlist and uhh haven’t seen any of them JDJSKA (istg i use HSJSSKSH as a period - like . ) i’m still hype for cherry but very hesitant (idk if i can handle it) but i’m thinking about watching it in the next couple of weeks? i know it’ll take me forever bc i’m gonna have to keep pausing and shit but idk. i’ve asked around for very specific trigger warnings and time stamps so i REALLY know what’s coming (even if it spoiled the film a bit for me) but i do really wanna see it (i think? writing this now i’m not so sure lol) so whooooooo really knows lol, but chaos walking YES i was really excited about it :))) and about my friend uhh dude you don’t sound mean at all i was literally thinking the same thing but worse HAAKL idk what she was there for???? she bought my ticket tho so 💁🏾‍♀️ whatever

“SIMS ahh, BUNK BEDS ahh” had me cracking up lmao and you know my sims status JAJAHHAJ but i’m gonna become like you, saving every 5 minutes 😭 but that’s exactly what happened to me, i really didn’t know whether to shut it off or not but after 2 hours i was heartbroken lol i’m literally making a list of things i need to redo that wasn’t saved lmao

CAN I JUST SAY UR A MASTERMIND THOUGH??? UR SIMS GAME SOUNDS SO *chefs kiss* IM CRINE university is PAINFULLY long and LITERALLY I FEEEL THAT like you can’t do anything else without failing, i had my sim go to a party once for like a few hours and i felt so dumb afterwards like urgh he should’ve been studying LMAOO just cracking down on work honestly. UR NEIGHBOR!AU IN THE SIMS PLEASEEE i am very much in love with it, yes. (pouring rain has just suddenly begun where i am rn wow ok) i love that you put them on the same lot, that was really really smart and i love that ur living out your sexuality in the sims😭 i was abt to say “now you can say you’ve got experience bc of the sims” but ANYWAY IGNORE ME fhdhs THE ALIEN BABY DHSJSK i hope it’s not a dealbreaker for enisa. that’d be tragic. IM BACK IN UPPERCASE THO BC YES MAKING OUT IN THE SIMS IS SO HOT TO ME??? I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE STFU OH MY GOSH- all the stuff, whispering sweet nothings, and the making out, and JUST ALL OF IT!!! AM I TOUCH STARVED????? there was this time i made my sim just continue to woohoo bc it was turning me on big time. ANYWAY

half way through that i had to go to my grandmothers house (not the one that likes lion king, but uh hmm idk if you remember but i was talking abt my shit family so yeah that grandmother lol) so now i’m finishing this 🥴 and instead of chloe x halle i’m watching a tom interview lmao & if this takes me longer than 30 minutes.... imma cry

I REALLY WANNA ASK- IS IT BC UR GERMAN LIKE YOU CAN JUST WRITE OUT THAT LONG ASS WORD???? i mean i can’t write out supercalafrag- anyway, but that word is a bit nonsense, UR WORD IS A REAL WORD DUDE HDJSHS i love how ur like “maybe i mixed up these words” YEA OK.

lol i had to google what are waveformers lol (lol makes a comeback) and they look like curlers that you would sleep in (here we would call them curlers or uhm i forgot uhhhhhhh rollers i think) but ur fine when am i ever making sense?? i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌

H20 H20 H20 OH MY GOODNESS SHE BROUGHT UP H20 OK MY LIFE WAS H20🥲 I HAVE THEIR LOCKET NECKLACE AND (short storytime) when i was younger i thought they were american despite their accents (idk i was dumb) but then i figured they weren’t when lewis went to go study in america HAHAH ALSO FAVORITE COUPLE CLEO AND LEWIS UGH WATCH ME REWATCH THE SHOW NOW THANKS (also i hated elizabeth so much) but anyway back on topic, when lewis went to go study in the US i looked up where the show took place and all that good stuff and i found out they were australian HAHAH and that started my obsession with accents LMAO the uk :’)) (i’m proofreading AND AUSTRALIA IS NOT A PART OF THE UK LMAOO IM SOO DHSJSSHS) also it is now one of my many goals (besides the body roll HAHAH) to go to mako island (that’s what it’s called right??)

about music, i googled stormzy and i might listen to a song of his.. LOL I WANNA GIVE IT A TRY IMMA DO IT FOR YOU NFDVSFSG lmaoo the german rapper had me cackling (autocorrect once again being helpful and said raper and i’m like nOO) i mean we all have that one person. can’t lie, won’t lie. my one (IM SORRY BUT AUTOCORRECT HAD “MY ONE TRUE ACCOMPLISHMENT” SITTING AND READY HDJSJA I DONT EVEN TYPE THAT wHAT) person out of my white soft boy with brown hair and brown eyes type would beeeee pete davidson. love me some petey. i was gonna say rex orange county as well lmao but i don’t really loveeee him i’m just in love with his music... and wanna be friends with him..... so 👉🏾👈🏾 (i never do that fdshsh)

oh my goodness, i love tattoos too- GASP what are you thinking of getting 🥺 i want tattoos too but i’m too indecisive to figure out what to have & where. especially in my family... idk they aren’t frowned upon but my mom’s not applauding the thought lol, if i got one it would have to be meaningful but i am absolutely in love with (for example) ariana grande’s finger tattoos !! they’re so cute and simple :’) i don’t even know if i can get tattoos? my skin is... interesting. not in a bad way!! just like.... idk how to explain it??? keyloids run in the family & i got a piercing once and it got infected soo :/ the doctor also confirmed that if i wanted tattoos they couldn’t be in color so LMAO

ONCE AGAIN THIS WHOLE THING FEELS SO TMI DHSHSSJ IM LIKE OHMIGOSH SHUT UP SHE DOESNT CARE JESJSKS

in regards to you not sleeping, i wanted to mention that dumb bird, what was the reason it was up so early aT 4AM???? SIR WHO YOU CALLING TO??? also it’s 11:30pm and idk why i’m tired???

yeah i was never SUPER into justin so i don’t know exactly what albums you’re talking about lol, i do know yummy though.. but everyone did hahaha also i listen to so much pop 🙈 i mean maybe... idk what would count as pop and what wouldn’t. that new person feeling though.. i get that. it’s like who is this new person..? i kinda feel like that with taylor swift (i was never THAT into her either though so it’s like oh wait i didn’t know you from the beginning instead of hello old friend but you’re different lol)

about the concerts, thanks 🥰🥰 that’s so sweet what you did for your mom too, it’s nice seeing them so happy like 🥲 awh AND GLEE IS AND WAS MY LIFE FOR A V V LONG TIME, i’ve been meaning to rewatch it for the longest time lmaooo but i’m just so lazy and it’s such a commitment... i’ll have to get emotionally involved again and idk if i want that rn. but i have a friend on instagram and she runs a glee fan account and it’s such a big part of her life i really don’t think i could ever be THAT obsessed with something. like another one of my friends loves tom holland so much that she changed her mom’s name in her phone to what tom’s mom’s name is in his phone (that was confusing lol) and obviously i’m not judging them AT ALL, it just couldn’t be me lol

CONCERTS LOOK LIKE SO MUCH FUN 😩😩 LIKE THE EXPERIENCE AND THE FEELINGGG URGHSJS i wanna see a few people live like ari and chloe x halle and- hmm.... idk who else FJDSJ rex orange county i guess huh anyway, the experience just sounds so amazing and the atmosphere is just ✨✨✨ yeah

aria do it do it do it do it do it- watch hamilton!! but with subtitles bc you won’t catch half of the things they’re saying without them LMAO (me and my family watched it and they all didn’t like it bc they didn’t know what was happening lol) BUT DONT WATCH IT AT 4AM LMAO ITS LITERALLY 3 HOURS LONG

yes!! superior peter fics 🥺🥺🥺🥺 and it just shows how much of an incredible writer AND PERSON you are through your fics that you can turn a blurb into 2k....... like what.

LMAO the annoying thing, sometimes i feel like i’m bothering people (like right now HAHAH) but i think it’s my antisocial side being like yeaa no one wants to talk to you like you wanna talk to them :’) idk it’s strange!! sometimes i get really ✨insecure✨ and overthink everything LOL like is this too long, im talking too much, i’m swearing too much, oh lord i’m a pain, all that good shit lmao so that’s fun:))

ALSO YOUR BLOG IS SO FUN TO ME HAHAK LIKE ITS JUST YOUR OWN AND I LOVE THAT!!! like you talk about everything and anything on here lol,, and i say that bc what you said lmao how if i was someone else i would want to fuck me so bad😭 i honestly don’t understand how i don’t have people lining up though..... but if no one’s gonna tell you... then you tell yourself, period (and sometimes telling yourself is fucking yourself HSHAJKS OK NEXT)

ohmigosh the realization you had that you graduated last year and are going to uni this year🤧 but the fact that you had a teacher who LEFT THE GROUP CHAT bc she was mad at y’all i- 😭 but yeah about your maths (i always wondered why you guys call it maths and the US calls it math. like i know so many people out of the states, not just in the uk that say maths) teacher- i saw this post that said online school is looking a lot like dora the explorer😭😭 “you have any questions?” 🦗 “okay bye then” lmao and please i love when tests have nothing to do with what you studied like ??? thanks? sometimes i get scared that my teacher will somehow find out that i googled everything? or like my answer is too close to the answer sheet or something. i get sooo nervous lol but i’m already past that point of not being able to do anything myself DHJS i mean i’m still learning like i said!! read the question, read the answer. boom. now i know the answer to the question and i learned!

THANKS 🙈🥰🤧 idk how else to explain my feelings LMAO i feel it’s cool that you find my dance lessons and voice lessons cool so thanks :’)

oh god not headache season 😭😭 allergies are the worst like it’s not even funny. is headache season just when the seasons are changing or is it like... all throughout the summer? cuz i love the summer lmaoo i love the winter too but i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO

GIRL IF THAT BIRD DONT STOP CHIRPING- i am 100% convinced that it is the same bird trying to give you headaches and no sleep and it needs to stfu 😤 and pLEASE ur theme is adorable and pretty and cute but also it just feels like you? idk if i’m explaining this right or if it’s bc i’ve been talking to you for a bit but it’s cute but not innocent in a way that i’m surprised that you write smut and- yeah, that didn’t make sense!! but ur new theme is gonna look pretty too and as long as you like it, it’ll be amazing🥰

yessssss the fact that megan is gonna be ur pfp YES JUST YES

edit: ok i just need to 🥺😭 sometimes u make me wanna cry cuz i feel like you’re just a kind person. i truly mean this, the fact that you celebrate yours & others stretch marks makes me so 🥺🥺🥺 i honestly don’t know anyone who has said they want need more stretch marks and it’s just all very lovely to me :’)) OKAY IMMA STOP BEING SAPPY

#yes my fake tags are back #by popular demand #aka me #and look i have actual tags this time! #i’m seriously craving water ice rn....... huh #but it’s past midnight and i fr fr want a snack #aw man #i wrote that last paragraph while doing my tags yes #and i hope you become responsible for that anon’s orgasm #assuming they had one #and i saw your response to the tom thing and yeaa when they only look like that for something and it’s like aw bae be yourself #i’m gonna shut up now and find a snack but goodnight!! morning?? IDK #IF THESE TAGS END UP AS ACTUAL TAGS I AM SO SORRY HAHAHA #alright proofreading done and i’m gonna go eat cereal

okay i‘m on my way to a driving lesson rn and afterwards i have a zoom uni thing, and then another uni thing lmao. but hopefully i can reply to this in between because i‘ve been dying to talk to you since i got this ask dldjds💘💘💘 (i really like this heart. i had a 💖 phase for a while and now it‘s 💘 (seems like a very romantic heart but.... it is what it is idk dkddj)

^okay that was literally all i wrote before my lesson lmfao. just had the worst driving lesson ever dbdvsnylkxsksj i think i‘ve gotten too used to being good at driving and now i‘ve gotten too cocky with it 🥴 anyway i‘ve had such a stressful day and overall week but tbh i‘m already feeling better bc i can (indirectly) talk to you <333

omg i went to chloe or halle (i don‘t remember who out of the two)‘s instagram the other day and found out that they are not twins alejeleksjsksj but yes oh my god their voices are literally angelic and i can‘t wait to see Halle as Ariel (Arielle??)🥰 and omg it‘s literally 2021 and we‘ve only had......... one(?) black Disney Princess like it‘s about fucking time (I might be forgetting someone, I‘m not too familiar with the new Disney films, but as far as I remember there‘s only Tiana right? (who is literally a frog for 3/4 of the film 😭😭) so yes i‘m here for it too😌😌😌 (obviously she‘s not a cartoon like tiana ekdlek but she‘s a disney princess you know what i mean ddkjdh)

pfkejdj i‘m already overwhelmed with my parents i can‘t imagine having siblings too 😭😭 (sometimes i wish i had siblings but then other times (like after reading what you wrote dksjj) i‘m glad that i‘m an only child lmao like your brothers being mean to you and i remember when you cried and he was just like 👁👄👁 ok. like i’m totally okay being an only child sksjsj———and he doesn‘t listen to music 🤧🤧🤧 (although i guess that‘s good for you because at least he can‘t annoy you by listening to loud music that you hate dmdn)

okay okay i might watch wandavision then??? I‘ll definitely let you know!!! and yes omg i‘m loving tfatws (that really is so fucking hard to type omg) but same i totally get what you mean, i‘m not used to watching action series at all and every episode so far has been like a little movie so i‘m glad that i didn‘t wait until it was all out cause there’s no way i could binge watch that lol) and yes last episode was really intense. i‘m glad that marvel are talking about racism because (from what i‘ve seen) they haven‘t been the best in that department, and i‘m really curious to see what they‘ll do in the next episodes (curious isn‘t the right word but excited isn‘t the right wort either, like i‘m excited but in a neutral way ? i‘ll shut up dslsksj i hate that german has so many words that you cant translate because theres a really good german word that describes how i’m feeling but i cant think of a good translation ugh)

okay i absolutely need to watch lion king (and part 2 and 1/ 1/2 dksksj) AND hamilton, i might even do it soon 👀

BURGERS AT THE CINEMA? EBEEISNDBEKSK i‘ll come to the US just to go and watch a movie lmaooo, i think all the popcorn sizes and drinks are bigger as well, i‘ll come and watch chaos walking with you 😌😌 does next week work?

and yeah i‘ve seen posts with specific time stamps and trigger warning for cherry too so if you haven’t looked on tumblr yet i’ve def seen some! (but ive also seen some on twitter and yeah- i mean idk youve probably looked on tumblr but yeah- then there’s also imdb which doesn’t have time stamps i believe but quite specific warnings, mostly without spoilers!)

Tbh i don‘t think i would have even considered watching cherry if tom wasn‘t in it... (i’m personally fine with most of the triggering topics/things like for some reason i’m just stoic when i’m watching the most tragic films ever dldldldlbut the plot just... idk if it‘s for me you know? just entertainment wise?).... and even with tom in it i‘m unsure skeldls, i‘d totally get if you decide not to watch it but let me know if you do i‘d want to hear your thoughts! <3

SKSLSJJ my sims both finally graduated!! i think i played sometime last week, and i literally got the achievement/notification that i‘d been playing with this household for 24hours.... and that was BEFORE they graduated dldjdldkdksjjs

oh no my tumblr broke and three paragraphs of me talking about sims were deleted 😭😭😭

WAIT NO I TOOK SCREENSHOTSSKSK because i couldn’t press save so i knew they might be gone okay okay okay i‘m a genius

*move out

oh no idk if the quality is too bad to read... idk how good your eyes are dkdkdjjd (also sometimes it will be really bad quality for some but not for others so i hope that the you can see the pics in a normal/good quality)

Okay let me continue

OMG THE ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL STUFF IS THE BEST PART ABOUT THE SIMS DIDLDKJIkdkj i kind of miss how in the sims 3 they would be making out basically lying on top of each other if they were on a bed— but in sims 4 when they‘re sitting next to each other and everything that‘s definitely hot too 😌😭 or with hot tubs dkdkdk how one sim climbs on the other sim‘s lap before they woohoo (i used to make them skinny dip in the hot tub and then make out and woohoo so they’re like naked on top of each other even if you can‘t see anything- en e waysss)

Dkdkdkdj so @ Rindfleischet.. blah bla. so it‘s basically just loads of individual words put together/connected and that‘s a really big part of german. so yesterday i had an online Einführungsveranstaltung for uni (like it was a zoom meeting where they just talked about general stuff about the uni and i was really anxious before, idk why, but it turned out absolutely fine so) and that words consists of the two words Einführung (introduction) and Veranstaltung (event) which are also two individual words but you can make a new word (Einführungsveranstaltung, so in english that‘s basically “introduction event“ lmao) by combining those two words. there are obviously some rules like you can‘t just combine random words in a random order but you can basically make infinite words (technically). for example (i feel like i‘m teaching a class just skip this if you don’t care 🙃🙃🙃djdjdkdlns)

for example i could say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer (which is not underlined with red by tumblr because it is a grammatically correct compound word (i think that‘s what they‘re called?)) which is the words introduction + event + participant, so that word just means “participant of an introductory event“ but instead it‘s one word? i hope that makes sense? dkdkkdksks i mean it makes sense in german but idk if it makes sense to you cause idk if i‘m explaining it very well lmao,

(I just deleted a really really long paragraph that i wrote about gender in the german language and grammar, you‘re welcome slsksksj)

my capacity to think has now been used up for the week 🥴🥴🥴 i absolutely do not blame you if you just skipped over that part or can‘t be bothered to (re)read my awful explanation edkflsksjdjdj (again, i had double the amount of words but i just deleted it dkdkdlslsl but what‘s left lf my german lesson is probably confusing enough already😭i‘m sorry🥴)

so to answer your question LEJDKSKJ: it‘s really common to have long words in german, words that are just word+ word+ word + word made into one long word. obv rindfleischetikettierung..... is a very extreme example and it‘s normally just 2-4 words made into one! So yup i think that comes mostly from german and talking german and growing up here and going to school here and everything dmdfnsksx

i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌— YES. YES. Yes. I love that about us 😌😌🥰🥰/ I love us. Yes.

okay but your friend changing her mom‘s name into tom‘s mum‘s name (was that right? Dkdkdjh)—— so Justin Bieber once posted something where you could see that his Dad‘s number was saved as „Daddy Cakes“ (which, thinking back, sounds very weird ekejjej) and till this day I have my Dad’s contact name as Tata (which is serbian for Dad lmao), “Tata🍰“ in my phone because of it 😭😭😭😭🙃🙃🙃 it‘s not because of justin anymore like i‘ve just gotten used to it by now but at first i did it because of justin lol........ but nowadays i don‘t think i‘m THAT type of fan of anyone- like you know how people have fandom names (Justin‘s fans are the Beliebers, One Direction fans are Directioners (writing that hurt my soul💔💔💔)) and I wouldn‘t consider myself a fan of anyone like that. like even with tom i wouldn‘t call myself........ does tom even have a name for his fans??? Well if he does, I wouldn‘t call myself that. Like i used to be such a hardcore stan for any celebrity that i liked and now it‘s just... okay, i like em. (She says on her blog where she writes fan fiction about Tom Holland — WJDJEJDKELSKSKKSNSNDXB🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃)

Omg rex orange county!!!!!! I don‘t know that many songs like I‘ve only listened to the album pony, but i love it 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

thanks again for what you said about my fics/writing I‘m🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Pete Davidson Pete Davidson Pete Davidson I‘m-🥰🥰🥰🥰 and I can‘t explain why. But as blissfulparker said the other day (i don‘t want to tag her and make her read through all of this lolll) “I like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death 😍“ (or something along the lines of that) eskkejs okay pete isn‘t that bad, he looks quite good on some days but other days you‘re like... is this man alive? Like i don‘t want to be mean I love Pete so much The King of Staten Island is literally my favourite film ever (although it‘s not my #1 because of how he looks, but i mean he does look good) VUT ALSO

(Okay i was gonna look for a terrible picture of him but he really doesn‘t look as bad as people say??? like. i think he‘s hot. can‘t necessarily explain why. so that‘s that on that.)

i‘m not going chronologically right now (i just keep scrolling up to your ask and replying to whatever i see first sksksksh) so i might miss a thing or two that you said

Okay Stormzy, you really really don‘t have to dkdkdjd like i think you said you don‘t really listen to rap, and uk rap is a whole nother thing from us rap because of the accent i feel like??? (That sentence did not make sense) BUT if you‘re looking for a few songs that aren‘t like RAP rap, then I‘d recommend One Second (feat HER), Superheroes, Own it (which you might know?), ummm maybe the song Lessons?, he has a ton of Lion King references by the way dkdjdj for example in Rachael‘s Little Brother but that‘s like more RAP again if you know what I mean?😭 and it‘s also like 5 Minutes long and tbh i only started liking that song a year after that album came out lmao but Rachael‘s Little Brother is possibly my fav Stormzy song, then there is Shut Up which you absolutely need to listen to just for fun dldjdjd like it‘s just pure fun and also a little funny lmao, especially if you‘re not British (i imagine so at least) cause he‘s like shuTTTT up idk dldkdjdldkjdhdhfjfbfldlsksksks

Vossi Bop is one of his classics, and then maybeee - ok so there‘s Blinded By Your Grace Pt. 2 lmaoobdjsj it‘s very (Christian/) religious but i like it a lot even though i‘m not really Christian (at least not practicing or anything) so idk about your views on religion but i do like the song a lot just by like the sound lmao

Okay so again you absolutely DO NOT have to listen to any, especially not for me dlskdj but I really do recommend the songs Superheroes, One Second and Rachael‘s Little Brother (and all the other ones i mentioned but if you don‘t listen to a lot of his songs you should at least give these three a try <3333) also let me know some of your songs? 🥺 like i dont care who they‘re by but i‘d love to listen to some that you like and Recommend 🥰🥰🥰

Okay so skdjdjdjddhhddhdhjsk... I used to watch all of my series in German (like H2O) bc obviously they were on german tv so they were german- and i knew that most of these actors i saw on tv were american and i was always SO fascinated that they all learned german for this show??? Like I actually thought they were the people‘s real voices and that these English and American actors were learning german so they could re-record the whole ass show and do everything in german dkdkdldjdjjd... i swear I thought that until I was like 14 omg. And then the first time that I watched H2O in the original version i was sooo confused about their accents because to me all actors who spoke english were American?? I mean MOST of those shows are American so I wasn‘t completely off but yeah i was definitely caught off guard when I heard all of their Australian accents for the first time 💀💀😭😭😭

@ math vs maths, math actually makes more sense in my opinion. like you have the word mathematics, then the abbreviation would obviously be math... why would English people randomly add the s from the end??? Or maybe it makes more sense after all because it‘s like plural??? Now I‘m unsure dkdkdkdj but i do say maths because that‘s how i was taught to say it and i hear the word maths more than math but yeah dldkdjs i think math might even make more sense (okay i just tried saying math and maths is easier to pronounce but again tjat might just be me, oh god i‘ll stop talking about that disgusting thing (mathematics).)

not the crickets and dora LMAOOOSNSNSMDNBS yeah that teacher was... a lot. a lot a lot a lot didjjd but she kinda liked me so she always gave me good grades/marks but the people she didn‘t like..... ooft. OOF.

Fksksjsj idek about headache season like i just know that i get headaches from the sun and i‘m allergic to only one.. type of...pollen??? (I don’t understand the science of that whole pollen thing and idek if it’s called pollen in english i just know sex pollen from fan fics😔)and yeah we have this weird wind that makes a lot of people get headaches yeahd dkdkdj. i loved the i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO lllioool i love that i really do. i always struggle so much in the summer cause i never have anything to wear. i feel like i buy so many new summer clothes every year but when i end up looking for an outfit i don‘t ever find anything 😭 (so i just go naked— lmao jk jk) but i‘m generally not the biggest fan of summer so-

OMG THIS FUCKING BIRD ISTG, okay the first time i heard it i went to sleep at like 5 am, so the next day i was like let me go to bed earlier so the bird doesn‘t keep me up, so i went to bed at 4 am (🥲) and THE BIRD JUST STARTED FUCKING CHIRPING SO LOUDLY, so the next day i went to bed at 3 am AND IT FUCKING STARTED AT 3 AM and it‘s still there 😁 every. night.

and since you said you‘ve gotten used to my theme and everything (idk where this transition came from😭) so tomorrow (2nd april) we have our... wait what‘s an anniversary but for a month.? I think month is like mensus in latin OK NO THATS DEF WRONG DKDKDJ wait

So Tomorrow is our... mensiversary💘💘💘💘💘💘 or at least from the first time you sent an ask. i couldn‘t find it on my tumblr anymore because tumblr is a bit of a bitch but i remember the first thing you ever sent (in an ask) was something lovely about my writing and i always take screenshots of stuff like that, and i found it in my gallery. and i took that screenshot of your ask on the 2nd of march so i‘m assuming that‘s when you sent it 🥰🥰 i feel like i‘ve known you for a week not a month like how is it a month already????? (i mean this in a good way lmao but i really can’t believe that its been a month wtf)

omg no you make me want to cry because i just love you so much 😭😭🥺 but about the stretch mark thing it‘s just.. it‘s not even me trying to empower other women (or anyone else who has stretch marks) to shake off these dumb insecurities that the patriarchy and capitalism have instilled in us— ok no it‘s definitely that too lmao. But i mean I‘ve always loved stretch marks, i‘ve just always loved loved loved them so much so it makes me genuinely sad that people don‘t like them. so yeah. i dont really know how to explain it lol, like i‘m not (only) hoping that people realise that hating your stretch marks is giving the men and the patriarchy what they want per se- (that made no sense) it‘s just because i love stretch marks and think they‘re beautiful and also sexy. idk dldkdjls and omg the fact that you called me kind 🥺🥺🥺 like i don‘t really have a goal in life or anything, but if i had to choose a ‘goal‘ in life it would just be to be kind. (i‘ll end this here otherwise i‘m gonna talk about being kind for 30 more lines—)

And please. Do not ever feel like you‘re annoying me or sending too much. never ever ever. I get so happy when i see that you‘ve sent me an ask. No matter if it‘s a long one like this or just a short one where you‘re saying something about a post that i reblogged or something. I love hearing from/about you and talking to you 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

P.S: i‘m so sorry for the tags you‘re about to read they make even less sense than this post, also i reached the tag limit dkdkdj but i said some butterfly tattoos look tacky... and the next thing i said was since we‘re already speaking about Ariana- I DID NOT MEAN THAT SHE WAS TACKY dldkdjsj, i meant since you already mentioned some of her tattoos lmao

#lovely anon #<3 #ALSO I LOVE YOUR TAGS SM DKDJDKDL #i definitely (accidentally) didn‘t say something about every single thing you said #but this is so long already and i don‘t want to force you to read even more of my shite dldkdjsj #(i dont day shite i say shit but sometimes shite sound funnier) #*say #omg its too mate to speak english what i meant was i‘m sire i forgot to adress some of the things you said but i tried my best iwjwskb #omg adress (address? lmao) sounds so negative i mean i‘m sure i forgot to reply to some things- also *late not mate loool #omg ignore my whole german lesson i cant believe i actually wrote all of that wtf #but it took me like 20 minutes so i don‘t want to delete it 😭 #and omg i hope you got to re do everything that your sims game didnt save and that it all worked out the same #😭 #I NEARLY DELETED THIS ASK WITJ MY ANSWER OH MYFUCKING GOD MY FUCKING HEART #also i realised i didnt say anything at all about uni but i dont have any news like that Einführungsveranstaltung (😭) I went to was literall #just about schedules and credits and boring stuff mostly lmao #oh and tattoos!!!! it sucks that you might not be able to get the ones that you want/get any :((((( but hopefully you can at least get some #that arent in colour? 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼 #so my parents aren‘t that supportive either like they most definitely wouldnt pay for it (even though they pay for a lot of my stuff lmao) #but i think in the end they know that i‘m old enough and they can‘t stop me and they‘d accept it one day so they‘re definitely not THAT bad #maybe your parents will change their mind over time? :( #or maybe youll just get one one day and ig theyll have to get used to it lol #so i want a butterfly (thats the only thing that i‘m sure about) and there are a lot of butterfly tattoos that look really tacky #but speaking of her i actually really like ariana‘s butterfly! but idk if i want that much shading- i have a whole album with like 35 photos #of just butterfly tattoos lol- i‘ll stop here tho. ldkdkd #omg im rereading this all and it‘s so messy good luck dkdkkddl #my tags got messed up and idk how to fix it #wait did i reach the tag limit and you cant even see half of these? 😭😭😭 #i‘m so confused about these tags why are they not in the correct order? 😭😭😭 ily snd i‘m so sorry for dropping this post on you none of it #none of it makes sense.

[yikeswtfmate]

(1) New Message from Unknown Number

main masterlist // (1) New Message Masterlist // next part

Summary: Y/N is drunk and can’t remember her ex’s number.

A/N: Hello, it is I, the idiot who writes Social Media AUs when she’s drunk but is too lazy to put them in the proper format and just leaves them to die somewhere on her laptop

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Social Media AU - that’s a lie, it’s actually just texts in Word format 🤡)

Warnings: swearing, dumbassery

Unknown Number: Hey asshat so listen

Unknown Number: I kno we hvnt spoken since like

Unknown Number: High school but whateve idc

Unknown Number: U’re an asshle so I dnt even care that its like…

Unknown Number: 3 in the morning nvrmd

Unknown Number: Ive ben dared to txt my hottest ex by these evil witchS so

Unknown Number: Here u go

Unknown Number: At least u had decent abs so congrats on tht jfc

Unknown Number:  also u dnt get to complain abt this txt bc like

Unknown Number: u dated me for 6 months on a dare so U KNOW WHat this shuold feel like ya

Unknown Number: Wow dude that sounds like a dick move

Unknown Number: Seriously who the hell dates someone for 6 months on a dare?

Unknown Number: Doesn’t that only happen in movies though?

Unknown Number: hey bitchass dont act like u don’t kno what im talkinG abt

Unknown Number: Oh shit yeah, sorry. I don’t know who this asshole of an ex is but I sure as hell am not him

Unknown Number: Dude sounds like a complete waste of human space

Unknown Number: And I think I wouldn’t get to live it down if my friends would hear I did something that shitty

Unknown Number: Wait lemme ask Sam

Unknown Number: Nah, he says Steve would’ve beaten my ass if I were to do that so there u go

Unknown Number: m sorry who tf are u

Unknown Number: Bucky

Unknown Number: what kind of stupid name is bucky

Unknown Number: Shit man, u’re the one blowing up my phone at 3 in the morning, sending me weird ass messages when I don’t even know u and u dare say my name is stupid???

Unknown Number: Sheit srry

Unknown Number: Is been A long night

Unknown Number: nd week

Unknown Number: Actlly make thAt the whle entire fuckin month

Girl with asshole ex: Srry fr bothering u

Unknown Number: It‘s cool

Girl with asshole ex: Hey the witches ask if ure hot

Bonky: Yeah

Girl with asshole ex: WHAT THE FCK MAN AT LEST BE A LIL BIT HUMBLE SMH

Bonky: U wanted me to lie?

Girl with asshole ex: Fair point

Girl with asshole ex: They wnt a pic

Girl with asshole ex: Pic or it didn’t happen punk

Girl with asshole ex: Tht was nat

Bonky: What kind of party are u at that you can constantly text me?

Girl with asshole ex: Wanda’s place

Girl with asshole ex: Girls night

Girl with asshole ex: Getting hammered on wine BITCH

Girl with asshole ex: Also dnt change the subject

Bonky: I don’t even know your name

Girl with asshole ex: Why would I tell u my name I just want to see a suppsdly hot asssd

Bonky: You know mine and now you want me to send u a pic of me

Bonky: Bit of a disadvantage here babe

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: BABE?

Girl with asshole ex: Fine

Girl with asshole ex: BABE if I tell u my name will u send a pic of u so we kno u arnt a 60yr old perv

Bonky: I’ll think about it

Girl with asshole ex: Hey fuck u

Girl with asshole ex: Not fair

Bonky: How do I know you’re not the 60yr old perv?

Girl with asshole ex: Cuz she got big tiddies to prove

Girl with asshole ex: And that was wanda

Girl with asshole ex: So now u know my fridsn

Bonky: Still don’t know your name tho babe

Bonky: Also tell Wanda she shouldn’t give out this type of info to strangers

Girl with asshole ex: ure not a stranger anymore bonky

Girl with asshole ex: ure my babe nao

Bonky: I’m going to let that Bonky slide just bc u’re cute

Bonky: But I’m also going to stop replying until you tell me your name

Girl with asshole ex: U think im cute?

Girl with asshole ex: 

Girl with asshole ex: I mean u havnt even seen me but thats fair

Girl with asshole ex: Wand and nat say its true so ill believe u rnt lying to me rn

Girl with asshole ex: But I wanna see if ure cute

Girl with asshole ex: Wait why r u up st 3 in the mrng I mean we re drunk but wht r u doing

Girl with asshole ex: Babe u need to take better care of urself

Girl with asshole ex: Babe

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: BABE?

Girl with asshole ex: Ph shit ure actually ignoring me

Girl with asshole ex: I dont like this

Girl with asshole ex: I actually like talking to u

Girl with asshole ex: Pls stop ignoring me

Girl with asshole ex: COME BACK AND LOBE ME

Girl with asshole ex: Babe?

Girl with asshole ex: Fine

Girl with asshole ex: It’s Y/N

Bonky: Now, that wasn’t so hard was it? 

Babe: fcuk u

Bonky: I’m up at 3 bc we ordered pizza and decided it’s time to beat Sam’s ass in Mario Kart once and for all

Babe: Nd how’s that going for ya?

Bonky: Bitch has been beating us for the past 3 hours

Bonky: Thor is the only one getting at least close to him now so we’re about to give up

Babe: Wait shit how r u replying so fast if ure playing Mario kart tho

Bonky: I gave up two hours ago

Babe: Quitter

Bonky: Just gotta know which fights to pick babe

Babe: Heads up I might be fallin asleep soon

Bonky: Drink some water before that, maybe get some food in u as well to soak up all the alcohol and have an advil close for tomorrow

Babe: Ok MOM

Bonky: Hey Wanda willingly told me you have “big tiddies” so your friends don’t seem to be doing a good job of taking care of you

Bonky: Might as well let me do it so you don’t die tmrw

Babe: Ohhhh so u careeeee babe im touched

Babe: Kkkkkk Ill talk tu u tmrw ill be dead soon

Babe: Nd I do have big tiddies

Bonky: Good night babe

*

Babe: What the shit

Bonky: I see you survived

Babe: Barely

Babe: My head might explode soon and I feel like I’ve vomited for an entire lifetime

Babe: TMI sorry

Bonky: I’d like to point out I’m glad I don’t have to decipher your texts anymore and that you can actually spell properly

Babe: Fuck you Buckaroo

Bonky: I would also like to remind you that I have on good authority that you have “big tiddies” so don’t make me use that against you

Babe: I am going to kill Wanda

Babe:Ugh I need coffee

Babe: I’ll talk to you later

Bonky: I’ll be waiting for you babe

*

Babe: So

Babe: BABE

Bonky: Yes baby?

Babe: 

Bonky: Nah, you love it

Babe: Fine

Babe: You still haven’t sent a pic of you though. I might be able to rise Nat and Wanda from the dead if you do

Bonky: What do I get in return?

Babe: The promise that I will keep replying even though you might turn out to be an ugly orc?

Bonky: Not enough

Babe: Fine. I’ll keep talking to you until you want me to stop. Or until I get bored of you

Bonky: Eh, you can do better

Babe: What do you WANT?

Bonky: A pic of you in return

Babe: I’m not sending you nudes, perv

Bonky: If I wanted to see you naked and be a dick about it, I could’ve asked last night, don’t worry

Bonky: But if you’ll know how I look it’s only fair I should know how you look

Babe: That sounds reasonable

Bonky: I’d say it’s a fair exchange

Babe: Fine, you first then

Bonky: If you don’t send me a pic of you afterwards babe I will stop replying, just so you know

Bonky:

Babe: Did you type super hot guy with the most beautiful eyes in the world in Google or something?

Bonky: I’m touched but no. Sam took that photo at a work event

Babe: Bitch do you really expect me to believe this is you? That looks like a guy who just stepped out of a magazine, I highly doubt I would have the luck to text him instead of my ex when drunk

Bonky:

Bonky: Are you always this annoying?

Babe: …

Bonky: What? Do you want me to take a selfie with the fucking newspaper now? I read the news online babe, I’m not getting off of this couch just so I can buy a stupid newspaper to prove it’s me

Babe: Do you have one in a suit?

Bonky: …why am I putting up with this?

Bonky: Hold on

Bonky:

Bonky: It’s been 5 minutes, are you going to reply?

Bonky: You still have to send me a picture of you though, a deal is a deal you know

Bonky: Fine, I warned you

Babe: Shit sorry

Babe: Hi Bucky, this is Natasha

Bonky: Hi Natasha. Is Y/N alright?

Babe: Uhm how should I put this?

Babe: Y/N is crying right now and she can’t reply herself

Bonky: What? What happened? Is she okay?

Babe: Oh yeah

Babe: She’s just crying because (and I’m quoting here) you’re “so beautiful, it’s like all my wet dreams and fantasies have come together. I swear this is some cosmic joke, this is not happening”

Babe: I’m not sure if she’s laughing or crying now

Babe: But she keeps yelling at me that I have to send you the most perfect picture of herself that has ever existed or you will stop talking to her

Babe: I think she started crying again because “I will never live up to that level of perfection, he told me that I have to know which fights to pick”

Babe: Uh yeah so here

Babe: 1 Photo Attached

Bonky: Hey Nat, could you tell Y/N that I would like to talk to her now?

Babe: Sure

Babe: Hey

Bonky: Baby?

Babe: Yeah?

Bonky: You picked the wrong fight if you think “you will never live up to this level of perfection”

Babe: Oh God

Bonky: Stop being an idiot

Bonky: And listen to me

Bonky: I would really like to keep talking to you. Mainly because you’re an idiot who makes me laugh, but it’s also the fact that you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen in my entire life

Babe:

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes oneshot #social media au #bucky barnes social media au #bucky barnes au #social media #bucky barnes texts

[jisvnq]

OK SO LIFE UPDATE!!! So me and my mom have this tradition of getting coffee together every Saturday morning and since I just turned 15 and I’ve been asking her to teach how to drive since I was 14 she decided THAT SHES GOING TO TEACH ME HOW TO DRIVE EVERY SATURDAY TOO!!!!!AUDHEIEJENSJIWKSB- plus I really wanna get my permit so I can drive around my mom and stuff like a chauffeur AND TOO RUB IN MY OLDER SISTER AND BROTHERS FACE THAT THE YOUNGEST SIBLING GOT THEIR PERMIT when they just turned 15- and brother literally called my mom asking for help on his permit test like 2 or 3 years ago so if she doesn’t help me then that’s just favoritism and she proclaimes she doesn’t have favorites when we all know it’s ME.....jk jk (kinda) and this weekend my mom said she would take me too the bookstore since we didn’t get to go last weekend :( OH AND ON MY BIRTHDAY MY MOM, SISTER, BROTHER, MY SISTERS HUSBAND, AND HIS NEPHEW THREW ME A SURPRISE PARTY!!!! oh and even though I don’t have to tell you this I want to anyway because 1.) I’m ranting and 2.) I’m comfortable with you and I trust you!! Ok so for the couple months almost a year we’ve been living with my mom’s fiancé’s mom, his sister, and his sisters daughter (we nvr get along with each other) and everytime my mom puts in an application for an apartment or a house they never have room or something came up because of STUPID (ง'̀-'́)งCOVID but a week ago my mom put in another application which is also where her best friend who is also my god mother stays at with my god brother and sister (fun fact: my mom has been friends with my god mother since they were in middle school and now there both 43- like WOW and her kids are so nice like me and her son are 2 years apart and her daughter who I’m older than are also two years apart) so fingers crossed 🤞🏽 we get in!! Because I’m not really comfortable at where we are now because his mom is a HARDCORE CHRISTIAN and I’ve been talking to her about lgbtq+, BLM, and other things like that and everytime she says she doesn’t want me to be like the people in the lgbtq+ community because they’re gods enemy but newflash based on what she says I already am because I’m bisexual and this one time I asked her if she didn’t know me would I look like a boy or a girl and she asked me “do you wanna be a boy?” And I said no I was just asking and then she dismissed me telling me to put on some girly clothes and earring when I’m literally having issues with my gender I LITERALLY HAD A PANIC ATTACK AFTER THAT CONVERSATION WHEN I GOT BACK INTO THE ROOM I WAS STAYING IN and I can barybe in the same room with any of them without getting nervous or anxious because I’m not comfortable around them AT ALL, and this one time when I was somewhat comfortable around I told her that I had Social anxiety and depression and she told me to go READ THE BIBLE because if I do then I wouldn’t have that anymore and in my mind I was like: 👁👄👁- what? But anyways enough about that update me on your life and thingz- 🥺 anon

SCREAMS CUTIE'S LIFE UPDATE YES

coffee together every saturday help that is so cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺 anD YOU GET TO LEARN HOW TO DRIVE NOW???????? COOL?????????? and you had a surprise party 🥺🥺

i'm so glad you're comfortable with me and trust me oh my god 🥺 and IKR THOSE KINDS OF FRIENDS ARE AMAZING OMG (tmi my mom has this one friend from when they were in kindergarten and they lived just across each other so they always hung out together every weekend and they're still friends until now and they're 44 🥺🥺 they got married roughly around the same time and had kids nearly at the same time too skfjjs and we still go to visit them every weekend despite our houses being like quite far away lol)

sjdhfjd but that kind of thing? omg HARDCORE CHRISTIAN ?? pls i go to a catholic school (where i know a bunch of lgbtq+ people) and i'm pretty sure the point they're trying to teach in catholicism is to ACCEPT EVERYONE ??? and omg why's she there telling you what to wear and what to do when your own mother is literally fine with it ??????

AND YES THAT'S ANOTHER THING like my teachers once told my parents about me being so quiet and me shaking every time i'm told to present for a group and they just brushed it off, got mad at me when we got home, told me i shouldn't embarrass them like that, then they proceeded to tell me that people who have depression and anxiety are weak and they have weak faith in God so i should start reading the bible and pray instead... i s w e a r...

i'm literally part of the bible quiz group every year and istg i used to read that thing everyday, i go to a catholic school so we're always praying, but i swear when i begin shaking and stuttering like mad in front of people, nothing's helping me there. like ik it does for others, like one of our teachers who ACTUALLY TRIED HELPING ME WITH THIS SHAKING PROBLEM OF MINE, but idk it just doesn't for me and i'm sure it doesn't for others as well...

sometimes it just makes me wonder how some people think that just because this one thing this one way works for them, it'll suddenly work for every single human being on this planet omg 🤦‍♀️

cutie i love you and please don't feel forced to do anything by that godmother of yours... ik you probably aren't, but if that happens again i think you can tell your mother 🥺 like maybe tell her it's making you uncomfy so she could probably talk to her friend about it ?

#buzz buzz mail for z #🥺 anon #so much tmi but i need to get that out of my head somehow lol #also like the 2nd to the last paragraph on ppl thinking what works for then WILL work on others #there's some people ik thinking that aliens don't exist bcs other planets don't have what we have on earth like... #like what if we need oxygen and oxygen is deadly to them? what if we need water to live and our water is poisonous to them? #like what if that crazyass high temp in venus and its atmosphere is deadly to us but is what THEY need to live? #i'm just on my aliens exist for mfing sure agenda #and like what the almighty kang taehyun from txt said: #'saying there's no aliens in the universe is the same as scooping water from the ocean in your hands & saying theres no fish' #i WILL push my aliens agenda #also i just woke up and my conscience is still flying all over the place lmao #my brain fly fly high high or some shit idk whats up with me either

[knjnvrland]

Prank Wars - ch.5

> pairing | jungkook x reader

> word count | 3k

> genre | college!au, fluff, smut, angst

> warnings | swearing, alcohol consumption

> synopsis | College can be a stressful time in anyone’s life as it is, why don’t we throw a little prank war in the mix to make it harder?

> fic masterlist

> A/N | English is not my first language, I’m sorry for the eventual spelling mistake, please let me know if you find any! 

CHAPTER 5 - Yogurt

“Hey y/n, can I borrow a pen?” Jungkook was sitting across from you at the library, you just turned your case at him so he could grab whatever he needed.

There were a few of you studying for your exams on the shared table. Alice was already used to this new weird friendship between you and Jungkook, seeing as she met with you at the entrance of Yoongi's building the day she got back after your terrible date had happened, and you just ended up explaining everything to her, but the rest of the group was still very much confused and not really adapting to these new dynamics. 

Every time you and Jungkook had any type of friendly interaction, a weird look would be exchanged between the boys who happened to be near, this time it was Namjoon and Jimin. Namjoon was actually studying for a test, while also helping you out with yours, seeing as he still had his notes from when he took that class, but Jimin was just hiding out from Hoseok, as the older one had been texting him for hours now wanting to have an extra rehearsal that day.

“Why is Hobi texting the group chat asking where you are?” Alice was taking a break on her phone.

“I swear to god if any of you rat me out our friendship is over” Jimin’s desperation was made clear in the tone of his voice, and none of you dared to contradict him.

“Why can’t you just tell him you’re tired today?” You asked, pushing your laptop away from you to rest your eyes for a bit.

“Or maybe just tell him the true” Jungkook added “we can’t put up with his shit anymore” he then found a pack of gun in your case and took one out, not really asking if he could, and extending another one to you, which you took gladly. Jimin looked weirded out by the small interaction again, but didn’t say anything.

“He helped me out a lot last year, I can’t do this to him” he dropped his face on the table with a sight.

“But you also have a lot to do, just tell him the truth” you insisted “besides you can’t keep this up for long, he’s coming to meet me here in a few” at that both boys across from you widened their eyes.

“fuck, where can we hide?” Jungkook was already gathering his stuff.

“wait, you’re also hiding from him?” Jimin was quick to follow.

“Yeah, I told him I had a dentist’s appointment, now hurry, he can be here any second” Jungkook was already putting back his coat and grabbing his stuff.

“you can hide at the studio, I’m going there now, I can let you in” Alice took her chance to scape the extra studying she was supposed to be doing, and started packing her stuff.

“will Yoongi be cool?” Jungkook stopped his frenetic getaway moves. Ever since his prank, and specially after Yoongi heard what came after with your date, he was banned from the studio. Yoongi even went as far as changing the password for the front door, and refused to help Jungkook out with the music classes he was taking on the side, even though he promised he would.

“Yeah, we’ll grab him food on the way there, I can help you out, he was talking about needing you this past week anyway, this might as well be your best shot” Alice started moving to the door without looking back, and the boys shared a look before following her. They were halfway out when Jungkook turned around and ran back to you, dropping the pen he just borrowed in front of you and giving you a quick peck on the top of your head while saying a barely understandable ‘thanks’, you couldn’t even respond and he was already gone again.

Your brother gave you the weirdest look, at which you only rolled your eyes and slammed your notebook shut. “let's go to Jin’s, I need coffee, I’ll explain everything there”.

“Wow ok I wish I knew all that a couple days ago when I bumped into Ray” Namjoon was beside you at a small table in the corner of your older brother’s cafe.

“It's honestly not that big of a deal” you sipped on your latte, wishing it was still as warm as when you got it. The story took longer to tell then you expected because of the thousand questions Namjoon interrupted you with. “If anything it helped me realize that Jungkook is not that bad”

“Of course he’s not that bad” Jin took the empty chair across the two of you “but why is he not that bad, again?”

“oh my god it’s such a long story, ask Joon to update you later” you grabbed one of the scones he sat in front of you and took a bite “hmm that’s actually the best one so far”. It was becoming routine for whenever you dropped by, you’d be forced to try a new recipe.

“Right? I told Alice this was the best one, but she insists on arguing the pecan one is what should be on the menu.” He took a piece of it as well “see? It’s great! I’m a genius!” That being said, he stood up and disappeared to the kitchen again, only to pop his head back out “I haven’t forgotten about Jungkook, once these cookies are ready I’m coming back out and want to hear everything about it!”. You rolled your eyes and Namjoon dismissed him, the two of you being used to the gossipy side of your older sibling.

“As I was about to tell you” Namjoon continued “if you ever need anyone to beat him up-“

“I’ll ask Jin” you completed, and although annoyed, Namjoon couldn’t really contradict, you all knew that Seokjin was the one who putted more hours in his working out and was definitely the strongest of your friend group. “but no one is getting beat up, let’s just forget he ever existed”.

“It’s your call” Joon finished his iced americano in a gulp “but you and JK are good, right?”

“Yeah, I think we’re friends. The morning after I slept over I woke up to him making me scrambled eggs, I can’t really stay mad after that”. It was true, you woke up really confused, not knowing where you were, but your sense of smell was the one to remind you, first with the peach scent all around you, and then with the smell of fresh breakfast. You were surprised to see Jungkook at the kitchen, specially because he never helped when all of you got together to cook, and the sight of him in an apron, in front of the stove, humming softly to himself, was an image that warmed your heart and you couldn’t shake off of your head ever since.

“I’m glad, we were all starting to worry how far the pranks would go, Tae even started a bet” he chuckled “the strange thing is that he betted on you” at that you laughed out loud. The thought of Taehyung siding with you was not a frequent one on your mind. You were about to ask Namjoon what the actual bet was, when Jimin bursted through the doors of the cafe, startling a couple of girls in the table by the entrance.

“You!” Jimin pointed your way, and took four steps, if much, to cross the whole cafe and stand beside the table “You’re going to help me”.

“What now?” You were already dreading your next task. The last time Jimin requested your help with such urgency you had to pretend that you were his jealous girlfriend to get him out of a horrible date.

“Jungkook. I must kill him” he was out of breath as if he ran all the way to the coffee shop as he plopped himself down on the empty chair your older brother was just in a few minutes earlier.

“Ok I can’t deal with this again” Namjoon shoved the rest of his croissant down his throat “leave Jungkook alone” you could barely understand him, but you figured out what it was, as he took his book and moved to sit on the counter where Jin was now finishing up a few orders.

“I don’t know if you realized, but our war is over” you clarified to Jimin “no more pranks for me”.

“Oh but it isn’t” Jimin stole the rest of the scone you still had in front of you “your new bff-“

“not my bff” you interrupted.

“whatever!” Jimin was clearly not up for the banter. “that asshole that we let hang out with us sold me out to Hoseok and I just spent the last hour of my life filling up his and Taehyung’s place”

“and my brother is not the target here because…?” You stole back the final bite of your food.

“because he set me up with a freshman last week and I swear to god it was the best head I've ever-“

“ew okay TMI! How many dates can you even fit in your schedule?” You were honestly impressed.

“not important” he then tried to steal a sip of your latte and you just gave it all to him. It was cold anyway. “the point is, I want blood -or at least some very public form of humiliation- and I need your help”

You rolled your eyes but you knew that you could never say no to Jimin. “okay, what do I have to do?”.

You were outside the boy’s changing room. Every Monday and Wednesday you had running practice, and every single time you ended up bumping into Jungkook as he went to his swimming practice. It was so routine that you never even acknowledged it. But Jimin noticed it, apparently, as he texted you your sign.

Chim Chim: yogurt You: ? Chim Chim: that’s the sign You: you could’ve just said that Chim Chim: just go ffs You: ok ok You: but if I get caught You: you’re paying for my food for a month Chim Chim: just fucking go omg

You tucked your phone inside the pocket of your hoodie and carefully opened the door. You could listen the sound of the showers running, and a few boys talking on the room next door, but there was no one on sigh. You tiptoed your way to locker number 10 -of course his number would be 10- and was about to unlock it with the numbers scribbled down your hand when you noticed it was open. What an idiot, honestly. The door cricked as it opened and you stopped breathing, afraid anyone could hear it. But no, all the human noises still came from de other room. You opened the bag you had with you and quickly began shoving everything in the locker inside it. After a few seconds pondering -you couldn’t spend that much more time in there anyway-, you retrieved his bucket hat and his car keys, putting those back into the locker and closing it without locking it back, as if you were never even there.

Once you were out of there, you finally released the breath you were holding in, and texted Jimin to let him know it was done. Then you made your way outside the building to meet up with the rest of the dancers that were waiting in the cafeteria across the entrance of the gymnasium. 

“How did it go?” Taehyung was sipping on a soda can, while Hoseok scrolled through his phone and Jimin looked at you expectantly.

You set your bag on the table and opened it, revealing every single one of Jungkook’s itens of clothing, as well as his phone, wallet and house keys. “I left behind his car keys” you pointed outside the window, to a car parked up front that you knew was his “and his hat” you smiled triumphantly and highfived the three boys, taking your empty seat again.

Now it was all a matter of time as the three of you patiently awaited for the show. It was about 5pm of a Monday, and the cafeteria, as well as that area of the campus, was fully packed. It took longer than any of you anticipated, as you watched while Jungkook’s friends left the building laughing, but with no sign of the younger man. You were typing away an idea for a short story in your phone when you heard Jimin’s loud laugh beside you, startling you. Soon enough, everyone near you was laughing, as they all looked outside to a, you guessed, very naked Jungkook streaking across the street with only his hat covering what he could manage to cover with it, and car keys in hand.

Just as he unlocked his car, right before he got in and away from all the stares, jokes and, surely, people photographing his ass, he looked straight at your table -straight at you. You smiled apologetic and could see a glint of something in his eyes, although you could not understand what that meant. As Jungkook drove away, the three remaining boys congratulated you and each other once again, and Jimin stood up with Jungkook’s things to drive to the younger boy’s place and give it all back. Jimin had his fun, but he was not a terrible enough person to leave someone at our day and age more than a few hours without their phone. Besides, how could Jungkook check out the pics already being posted all over social media without it?

Once again, you felt a bit bad, but it didn’t last long as when you were leaving the cafeteria, you could already hear a group of girls sitting by the register commenting on Jungkook’s physique, and you could tell that the whole scene that took place minutes before would only bust up his reputation. You could understand why, the amount of sports the kid did really were showing, but just before you could let your imagination run too wild, your phone rang with a twitter notification. Yup, definitely a reputation booster. Jungkook would have to thank Jimin, after all.

The last few weeks of the semester went by fast, and soon enough your last week of classes was here. You had just left Hoseok final performance, the one that Jungkook, Jimin and Tehyung had been practicing with him, and went out to grab a few commemorative drinks. You were all a bit tipsy by them, with Jimin and Taehyung leaving the group table to dance and Namjoon off somewhere with a girl. The rest of you still on the table were making small talk to the best of your ability, trying to ignore the loud music coming from all around you.

“I’m going to get another beer, anyone want anything?” Jin stood up first, and all of you nodded, agreeing on another round.

“I’ll go with you” you had to stand up to let Hobi pass, and that’s when you noticed the whole room spin around. 

“Careful there” Yoongi held your arm, giving you support and helping you sit down again.

“Someone already had too much” Alice teased and you glared at her general direction, not really being able to focus.

“I can’t believe I agreed to this” you had your last big final in a couple of days, and could already tell the next one would be lost on you, you were never good at studying after a night out.

“We can go home now sweets” Alice extended her hand to hold yours across the table “I can’t have a late night today anyway” she turned to Yoongi to give him a pack on the lips, and then motioned you to stand up with her. Jungkook ended up helping you out, but you were not that drunk that you couldn’t walk straight, it just took you a while to get used to the change from sitting to standing. You locked arms with Alice while she ordered an Uber, and the two of you made your way to the front door.

Yoongi and Jungkook watched as you left, and soon after Jin and Hoseok came back with the drinks.

“Where did they go?” Jin took his sit back by Jungkook.

“They left” Yoongi took a sip of the fresh beer in front of him “y/n was drunk and Alice has to wake up early”

“Well, more for us then” the three man clinked their bottles and were about to chug them down when something buzzed under Hobi’s butt “what the-“ he took your phone from under him, which was buzzing with some unknown number on it “someone forgot their phone”.

“It’s y/n’s” Jungkook recognized your case straight away. It was a simple transparent one, but you had the habit of pressing flowers in the middle of your books, and then using them to decorate everything you own. And there it was, in between your phone and the case, a small turquoise dry flower. “I can drop by to hand her tomorrow” he extended his hand, but Hoseok was hesitant to give it away.

“How can I trust that this is not another one of your pranks?” He moved the phone further away from his friend.

“How could it be if I didn’t even know she was going to forget her phone?” He stated the obvious, at which Yoongi agreed, motioning for Hobi to just give it away. "I spoke with Alice about dropping by tomorrow to do my laundry anyway, the last machine in our building broke a few weeks ago and I’ve been using theirs”.

“That’s convincing enough for me” he gave Jungkook the phone, and the boy tucked it in his front pocket after setting it to silent mode.

They kept drinking for a few more hours, but ended up having to carry Taehyung and Jimin out as the two boys were too drunk to walk properly, and the night ended with a lot of babysitting on the older guys side, with Jungkook disappearing as soon as he could, along with Hobi, and Namjoon never returning from his escapade, Yoongi stood around to help take them to Jin’s place and just spent the night there. Because of the confusion, however, they didn’t see the many missed calls from Alice’s phone the next morning, with you freaking out on the other side.

>A/N | not gonna lie I really love writing the pranks. Have a nice day, wherever and whoever you are :)

TAGLIST | @w1tchcraftt​ @girlwiththeglittereyeliner​ @teresaisla​ @nctssidehoe​ @kawaiimusiccollection​ @nininek12​

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