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keyotos · 11 months

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kiss the girl

summary ⎯ five times dan heng has thought about kissing you, and the one time he actually does.

tana's words ⎯ i've been recently listening to kiss the girl (ashley tisdale version) and its cute and made me think of dan heng. and idk if this follows canon story or not bc im not at xianzhou yet lolz.

also ik the title says 'kiss the girl' but that's only bc i was listening to the song. reader is gender neutral.

tags ⎯ friends to lovers. pining i think. hurt and comfort (at the end). flustered dan heng. fluff i think.

THE FIRST TIME dan heng thinks about kissing you, he immediately pushes away the thought. it was out of character; it was outrageous for him to think of a friend that way. it made him feel perverted for even thinking of the action.

it was a sunny day. you two (plus march and stelle) were in belobog at the time and you guys were witnessing bronya's speech. all of you agreed the speech was marvelous, and you all felt a sense of pride for bronya.

your eyes were sparkling in the sun as you watched bronya speak, and dan heng couldn't help but become enamoured by your face. he looked away from his paper to peek at your awed expression.

at that moment, dan heng thought you were the most beautiful person he's ever seen. but he can't think that. he cannot. not only were you a fellow trailblazer, but you were also his friend. he couldn't risk one of his greatest friendships over something as minimal as this.

so, he pushed the thought out of his brain. he thought that it would be gone forever, but he was deeply wrong.

THE SECOND TIME dan heng wanted to kiss you occured while you two were gazing in the astral express. by this time, you two have left belobog, and are awaiting your next journey.

you chose to pass the time by 'star-watching,' a new term you created as a substitute to cloud watching. the activity is similar to cloud watching as you point out shapes that make beings.

dan heng told you that you were just pointing out constellations, you said that you wanted to pass on the technicalities.

so now, you two were star-watching. you kept pointing out absurd patterns, such as, "this one looks like svarog," (it did not) and, "this one looks like balls." of course, none of the constellations looked like either of the comparisons (dan heng was thinking about taking you to the eye doctor), but dan heng played along anyway. anything to make you smile.

at one point, the absurdities stopped, and you began pointing out real constellations. so many beautiful creations in the sky, yet the real beautiful thing was right next to him, continuously pointing out constellations.

you rested your head on your hand, mindlessly gazing out at the empty field of stars in front of you, "it's beautiful."

"yeah," dan heng mindlessly replies, not even realizing what he's just said, "it is," he finally says, looking at you.

maybe it's the light from the stars hitting your face, or maybe it was just your radiant beauty, but the urge to kiss you came up once again. subconsciously, dan heng knew the feeling would arise sooner or later. but that didn't mean he liked the feeling.

he wants to preserve your friendship so bad; but sometimes, the line drawn alongside friendship and love begins to thin. sometimes, the line gets so thin that dan heng fears that he'll trip and fall into you.

THE THIRD TIME dan heng wanted to kiss you was when you two were hanging out in his room. over the span of months, dan heng has learned to appreciate your being, and sometimes (he will never admit this) he feels calmer around you.

usually, dan heng didn't let other people be in his room, but it was different with you. for some reason, he liked it when you were in his room. sometimes, he finds himself wanting you to be in his room.

he was quietly sorting through his data bank while you were reading. it was such a calm and quiet moment; dan heng felt peace for once. there was music playing softly in the back, the room was silent, and the air was just right. it felt nice.

dan heng was too tuned into his data bank that he didn't hear footsteps coming up closer to him. it was only when he turned his head to check on you, that dan heng noticed you were right next to him.

you were right next to him, head nearly leaning on his shoulder, and you were so close to him. dan heng's heart was about to beat out of his chest, and he began to worry about the warmth that was rapidly spreading to his neck.

when you noticed dan heng's reaction, you thought you'd surprised him. you moved a little bit back, "sorry, did i scare you?"

"no, not at all. i was just a little startled," dan heng replied while rubbing the back of his (reddening) neck.

"that's like, the same thing as scared," you gave a low chuckle and moved closer to him once again, "you would know this."

"dunno," dan heng paused, "maybe i was too frightened to remember." when you laughed at that, dan heng swore he blushed all the way up to his ears.

"you are not funny," you gave him a slight shove that didn't really affect him. you leaned closer into the database, "what are you doing?"

you didn't realize how close you were to dan heng, your faces nearly touching. you were scrolling around his data bank while dan heng was trying to hide his rampant blush from your eyes.

dan heng stared at you while you browsed, taking in your close presence. you didn't seem nearly as tense as he did. you were relaxed, comfortable, you leaned into him. dan heng found himself staring longer than normal.

then, the thought, came in. the same recurring thought he'd been having for a long time: the thought to kiss you. he wanted to take you by the hands and pull you closer to him. he wanted to feel your palms and he wanted to feel you closer to him.

and this is the moment were dan heng realizes that he wants to be more than friends. dan heng realizes that he likes you; he wants you to be with him, he wants to feel you by his side. he wants endless star-watching nights; he wants to see you constantly.

and that is dangerous. not only would that ruin your friendship, but it would also endanger you. there's so much that would put you at risk.

"you should go back to your room," dan heng puts a gentle hand on your shoulder, causing you to look back up at him. your confused expression almost shatters dan heng's resilience, but he goes on, "it's late. go get some rest."

you keep the hand on your shoulder, "you too. don't stay up too late, okay?" the soft tone of your voice makes dan heng melt, and he almost wants to pull you back and ask you to stay. almost.

dan heng nods and you leave. he leans back on his desk and puts his head in his hands. what is he going to do?

THE FOURTH TIME dan heng wanted to kiss you was the night you arrived in the xianzhou. you (and march and stelle) were exploring the city and it's wonders while dan heng was treading carefully behind you.

you haven't had a full conversation with dan heng for days. you assume it was probably because you were snooping around his data bank, but he has never minded that before. you haven't got an actual chance to apologize either, because for some reason, dan heng is now constantly busy.

the four of you decided that you would split up to look around. march immediately went to stelle, so that left you with dan heng.

dan heng knew this would happen. he couldn't avoid you for too long anyway, even if he tried. he would always end up gravitating back towards you.

it pained him to not talk to you. he missed your voice, your jokes, your little touches. he missed your book talks, he missed the way you'd always be in his room, he even missed your nosiness.

you and dan heng were aimlessly strolling around the streets until you found a lively street parlor. they were selling food, and the aroma was absolutely divine. dan heng knew you immediately caught your mind on something when he saw your beaming face.

you still haven't found a correct time to apologize to dan heng, but that can wait for later. you just wanted to talk to him. "dan heng! we should try some," you beamed.

"okay. i'll wait over here," dan heng monotonously replied. your smile slightly faltered, dan heng thought the sight to be excruciating.

he couldn't still be mad at you, right? you had to apologize soon, because this silent is agonizing. you couldn't help the fact that you missed dan heng. you missed late nights and his warm touch. you missed his sarcasm and his gentle nature.

when you returned, you brought back one giant kebab that dan heng knew you couldn't finish. you'd probably have enough to share with the entire express.

when you took a bite of the kebab, you moaned with delight, and dan heng forgot how much he missed your smile. it all came rushing back to him, all the things he missed about you. you are right here, in his grasp, yet he still cannot have you.

after your first bite, you offered a second bite to dan heng. etiquette was all out of the picture when you were there.

originally, dan heng wasn't planning to eat. there were lots of problems at hand, and dan heng could not relax now. but you were an obstacle in his equation. how could he refuse you when you were practically bouncing on your toes, smiling, and looking at him with such mirthful eyes. saying no to you was like refusing a blessing from the aeons.

he took a bite out of the kebab, to which he nodded in delight. dan heng finished chewing with a delighted expression on his face, and your smile appeared once again. dan heng felt his lips creep up, and sooner or later, he was smiling as well.

he looked down at your happy expression, and he noticed that you had food on the corner of your mouth. dan heng usually scolded you for being slightly messy, but in this tender moment, there was no need.

dan hen grabbed a napkin from a nearby table and wiped the corner off your mouth off. he wiped the food off so tenderly that you would think he was tending to something delicate and fragile. and the gaze he gave you after. you nearly passed out. dan heng looked at you with such fondness and love that you gripped the kebab harder.

his mind hadn't registered what he just did before you quietly said, "thank you."

dan heng nearly malfunctioned. what he just did was criminal. it was a simple thing, however it was most criminal to dan heng. during that moment, all he could think of was your lips on his. the tenderness of his touch was his mind projecting how he would cup your face when you two kissed. all of it felt so wrong, but so right.

"no problem," dan heng blushed and avoided your eyes. "do you... do you think we should meet back up with march and stelle?"

"yeah," you looked down at the ground, slightly flustered, "yeah. let's go."

things were awkward. but at least things were okay. and that was all that mattered to you.

MARCH 7TH HAD speculations. you and dan heng were like a pair. you two were a dynamic duo, second to march and stelle, of course. you would always be seen with each other. when march "accidentally" stumbles into dan heng's room, you'd be somewhere in there as well.

so, why is it that whenever march barges into dan heng's room, you aren't there? why are you not with him? why is he "constantly busy" when he there is nothing to store in the data bank? something was up, and march was determined to find out what was happening.

"don't you think it's weird that we never see dan heng and yn together anymore?" march asked stelle while sipping on juice.

stelle huffed, "i mean, it's a little weird. but maybe they're both exhausted. we just got out of belobog and now we're facing more conflict in another world."

"yeah, but," march paused for dramatic effect, "i saw them together in dan heng's room a few days ago."

stelle furrowed her eyebrows, "are you stalking them or something?"

"what?!" march exclaimed, nearly jumping out of her seat. the scene caused stelle to laugh, "no. of course not, i can't believe you accused me of that!"

"so... you don't think it's weird that we never see them together anymore?" march continued.

"okay. i'll answer. it's a little weird. but whatever it is i'm sure they have a reasonable explanation for it," stelle said. "why are you asking about them anyway?"

"because," march drew out the syllables, "they're cute. i've been shipping them. and plus, dan heng hasn't really been acting like himself recently."

"yeah, but what are we gonna do about it? he hasn't really opened up to us about his problems... like... ever..." stelle trailed off, as if she tried to remember how many times dan heng has ever spoken about himself.

"don't worry stelle," march grinned, "i have a plan."

"i can't believe we fell for this," you grimaced in the closet you were stuck in.

march and stelle split up and told both of you that there was a group meeting in march's room. obviously, because the both of you thought there was something urgent, you rushed in there. you were prepared, only to be ambushed and pushed in a closet by march and stelle as a ploy to "make up."

alas, you knew you needed to talk things out sooner or later.

dan heng, on the other hand, was freaking out. you're close. you're so close that he can feel every time you exhale out of your nose. this closet had no space, so you were practically pressed up on dan heng.

the one thing he couldn't see though, was your face. dan heng wanted to see your face. he wanted to study you up close: he wanted to your skin with his hands, wanted to pull you closer so he can observe the way your mouth lifts when you smile. he wants so much, but he can have none of it.

"i think i can break us out," dan heng offered.

"do you think they're guarding the doors?" you chuckled. dan heng gave a small smile after hearing your laugh. it's ironic that you're laughing in this situation while dan heng's heart is about to burst.

"i think the both of us can take them," dan heng answered.

this is the most you two have ever spoken to each other in days. you missed his voice and you missed being so close to him. unconsciously, you leaned closer to dan heng. you would know his warmth from anywhere.

as you two try to find a good point to hit, your hands brush against dan heng's. the way his hand feels on top of yours just feels right. the way his touch is still so gentle; oh how badly you missed his touch against yours.

"i'm sorry!" dan heng quickly removed his hands from yours. he moved away from you as well. you wanted so badly to chase him: you wanted to come closer, to place your hands with his one more time.

but you didn't. you doubted the fact that dan heng wanted to be near you. with his recent actions, you were wondering if the two of you were still on good terms or not. you could mess everything up with one action; dan heng was the very last thing you wanted to lose.

when you two finally found a good breaking point, you both put all your body strength into prying the doors open. it took a few tries, but the doors finally opened. however, there were consequences. the closet fell down with the combined force of both your bodies shaking it.

before you two fell to the floor, dan heng grabbed your arm and pulled you underneath him in a quick motion. your heart raced against your chest; you were so close that you could feel dan heng's heartbeat as well. and to your surprise, his heart was beating just as fast as yours.

the closet fell on top of you, and dan heng shoved it off of the two of you in one motion. seeing him do that just made your heart beat faster, and you were sure that you were breathing faster as well.

dan heng looked down to check on you, but doing so brought him much closer to you. closer than he had ever been. if dan heng moved down a little bit more, he would be able to close the distance between your lips. the urge was tempting: he was on top of you, your faces were both so close to each other, and your breathing was rampant and quick.

"are you alright?" dan heng asked. his breath fanned your face and you stared right into his eyes.

"i should be asking you that," you breathlessly whispered. he was so close and you were about to burst.

"i'm alright," he leaned down closer, "don't worry about me."

you two were both in a daze when you found yourselves leaning closer to each other. dan heng cupped your face; he couldn't wait any longer. all resilience went out the window, because right here, right now, you were here. you were in front of him, looking as radiant as ever, and dan heng could close the distance right now.

his hands treaded carefully across your face, as if you were one-of-a-kind. finally, his hands rested against your cheeks, and he leaned closer. dan heng was so close to kissing you before a commotion entered the room.

"OH MY GOD!" march exclaimed before running out of the room.

you startled, and accidentally pushed dan heng off of you. you frantically apologized while dan heng brushed himself off and helped you up. you were shaking at what almost just happened. you almost kissed your best friend.

the distance between you and dan heng was wide. he made sure to stand exactly five feet away from you. his hands were crossed and he refused to look at you. dan heng was worried that if he got even the slightest glance at you, he wouldn't be able to stop himself from what would happen next.

you both quickly left the room with racing hearts, confused thoughts, and a realization that whatever just happened was a mistake.

WHENEVER DAN HENG NEEDS SOMEONE to help him with his wounds, you are always that person.

at first, it was for team bonding. before stelle came, you all would take turns patching wounds to build team trust. however, with dan heng, the only person that he'd let patch up his wounds was you. you used to tease him and tell him that he was like a dog in that way, but he always brushed it off.

you were always gentle with him; carefully touching up on cuts and bruises with bandages or rubbing alcohol. by no means were you any doctor, but you were tender and calm.

dan heng was wounded again. there was no reason for him to be wounded. the fight was tame; the enemies weren't extremely powerful or anything. but for some reason, dan heng surpassed the rest of the team with more cuts.

now, you two were in a small room together. luckily, it's more spacious than the closet, but it wasn't as big as dan heng's room. you and dan heng were both sitting on a table; you sitting criss-cross-applesauce while dan heng was sitting properly.

the both of you haven't talked ever since the closet incident. instead, you two have been sharing gazes, brushing past each other in halls, and staying five feet away from each other.

this was the closest you have been in a while.

you are focused on banadaging dan heng's cuts. your eyes are glued to his arms and torso; you refused to look up at dan heng. you couldn't look at him for two reasons: you were slightly mad at him for obtaining so many injuries and you still couldn't look him in the eye after the past situation.

dan heng sat in silence as you tended to him. he knew you were mad at him, and he felt awful. dan heng knew that he didn't need to sustain as many injuries has he had. the only reason why he had so many injuries was that he was trying to distract himself from his feelings. the closet situation had him questioning himself. given the chance, would he hold himself back or would he let his urges win?

"i'm done," you let go of his arms and started putting bandages away. dan heng didn't know you'd be done so quickly. he wanted to bask in your grace for a little longer. dan heng thought about pulling a stitch in order to get you to stay longer, but that just seemed weird.

dan heng knew he couldn't let you leave like this. there was too many unspoken words between you two; most of them, partially his.

during this, dan heng realized something. he realized that, even though you are still mad at him, you stayed with him. you didn't ask for march or stelle to help him, but you did it yourself. dan heng could be reading too much into it, but dan heng is tired. he's tired of longing for you.

and maybe, just maybe, if you'll stay when it gets difficult (like right now), maybe you'll stay when it gets hard as well.

dan heng decides to leave all resilience behind. for once, he doesn't calculate the consequences nor does he hold himself back.

you're about to slide off the table until dan heng pleads, "wait." he grabs your arm and holds you there with a gentle grip. you could slip out of it if you wanted to, but this may be the first actual conversation the two of you will have in a while.

dan heng takes your silence as an answer. "thank you," he says. he curses at himself at the simple response. it was anti-climatic. "i appreciate you," he adds on.

the compliment made you blush, even though it was very simplistic. you avoid looking at him and rather focus on tapping your fingers on the table. "no problem. it was nothing anyway."

you two remain silent for a few moments; you didn't want to leave in fear that this may be one of your few conversations. dan heng was trying to find the right words to say.

"i really do appreciate you. for being here. for always being here," he continues. dan heng realizes he sounds redundant, and he wants to slap his palm across his face. with you, he couldn't find the right words to convey his actions. saying, "i'm sorry," wasn't enough and saying, "i miss you," was too little.

"i told you. it's nothing. i'd do the same for everyone else," and you wanted to chide yourself for saying the last sentence. not true, because the only person who'd you really do all of this for was only dan heng.

"i think this is the longest conversation we've had in a while," you murmur to yourself.

"i know," dan heng replies. you jump back on the table, almost falling off. if it wasn't for dan heng catching you (yet again), you would've fell off. his touch sends electricity through your veins; his touch brings warmth to your body.

"hey! you need to watch your stitches," you automatically scolded him. your nagging was a normal occurrence, but this time, it felt rare. dan heng hasn't heard you nag at him for years (days), and he feels as though he can breath normally now.

"sorry," he pulls back. you're left shuffling closer to dan heng, not that you notice, due to your almost fall. you two were facing each other now; the distance was a lot closer than before.

you let out a small laugh at the situation. practically falling of a table was not a laughing matter, but you always found joy in those situations. sometimes, dan heng thought it was a bit strange, but he always valued your optimism.

"i'm sorry dan heng," you look back down on the table, "i didn't know going through your data bank would make you ignore me for days," you let out dry chuckle.

dan heng furrows his eyebrows in shock, "don't apologize. i don't mind you looking through the data bank."

you looked up after his reply, expression shadowed with confusion, "wait? really? so... why the radio silence? did i have something to do with it?"

"no! no, it wasn't you," dan heng quickly reassured. "it was me. i was the problem."

"don't have to tell me that," you smiled and bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from laughing.

"i'm gonna let that slide," dan heng smirked. it was nice, the way you two fell back into your normal routines once again. it was like all the tension that was previously there, simply dissipated.

"i missed you," you crossed your legs on the table, moving back to the criss-cross applesauce position.

"me too," dan heng replied. "i missed you a lot." he looked straight into your eyes.

you flustered underneath his gaze, "i probably missed you more. sometimes i dunno if i can survive without you," you joked. it was a joke, but occasionally, you find it to be true.

"for me, it's the other way around," dan heng mumbled beneath his breath. "i really missed you. and our late nights. and star-watching."

"you missed star-watching?" you astonishly asked. dan heng wished he could take a picture of your grin when he told you that he missed star-watching.

"i missed a lot of things," dan heng paused, "but i missed you the most."

"i'm sorry for pushing you away yn. i was just⎯ scared," time to rip off the band-aid, "when i'm around you, i just get so messed up. you're the only thing on my mind sometimes. everything about you just makes me⎯ breathless? speechless? you amaze me to the point where i can't even think of a word to describe you."

dan heng pauses and his heart is racing. you're looking at him as if you want him to continue, as if you want him to finally say what he wants. dan heng doesn't know that you want it too.

"yn," dan heng looks straight at you, "i have feelings for you. feelings that i think will overwhelm me at one point if i keep it all together. i never stop thinking about you, longing for you. i want you and i think i really want to kiss you," dan heng finishes. he fumbled on his words back there, because he doesn't think he wants to kiss you, he wants to.

"dan heng..." your face is hot. your body is hot. your breathing is fast-paced and you feel like you are about to be on fire. adrenaline rushes through your veins and you are sure you are not thinking straight.

you pull him in for a kiss, tugging him closer by his chin and kissing him passionately. you take that fire from your body and you pour it all into this kiss. dan heng is surprised at first, but then reciprocates your actions. while your hand is on his face, his hands slide to your hips, tugging you closer and holding you tighter.

you two kiss until you have to stop for air. when you breathe, the whole world feels like it's on fire as well.

"i feel the same. i can't stop thinking about you," you lean in for another kiss, "i miss you," another kiss, "i missed being with you," another, "i missed being close to you," another, this time a little longer, "but i really hope i don't miss this."

"don't worry," dan heng pauses, "you won't. i promise."

and after all of that, dan heng finally got to kiss you.

#tana writes (∗´ ᨔ `∗)#this was a monster to write #i got this finished in one day #dan heng x you #dan heng x reader #dan heng #honkai star rail #hsr #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you #dan heng imagines #the way it just gets progressively longer #im gonna need 3-5 business days to recover #PROMOTING MY STELLE MARCH / STARCH AGENDA!!! STARCH STARCH STARCH #can you tell it got worse at the end

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silliest-heartaches · 6 months

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Ohh my god DRINKKK!! Dude I love them sooo muchhh. I just love imagining them being head over heels for each other yet constantly denying their feelings, because of how they view themselves, yet still finding comfort and solace with each other. They are so. YES. PERFECT. AUGH.

SHARE MORE ABOUT THEM PLEASE!!!

And I love how you use they/them for Ink and she/her for Dream!!

GOD YEAH I LIKE THEM SO INCREDIBLY MUCH... tbh the main reason i started liking them was bc i was thinking abt them and how doomed yuri coded they were and. The worms Wormed in from there,,,,

I actually use he/they and she/they for ink and dream respectively but!!!!!! I love all hcs and interpretations of them for REAL. nonbinary people who are gay as fuck for real,, very inherrently queer ship regardless of how u see either of them i think...heart seeing them as t4t transmasc and transfem forever personally though so thats what i see em as hehe,, also in my head theyre both aroacespec (though the specifc kind varies from au to au though i do consistently see ink as ace and dream as demiaro :>>)

Im not sure how long these will be so...hcs under the cut lol

- okay well while in my mind while error is technically the First Entity ink sees that isnt just a normal entity, dream is like their First. Friend. you know. Like when error first saw him he was screaming and crying for the hills bc it was also his first time seeing another outcode so. that reaction BUT with dream she was more filled with gentle confusion... this is a bit after she unstoned in the apple incident but still was new to au hopping and naive to most danger so they became friends!!! Questionably so.

-to elaborate, when they first meet dream is still stuck on the ideals of toxic positivity and pushing through hardship no matter what... i think this is something they eventually grow out of and dream will eventually learn to see the need for balance eventually but one of their first disputes happens when ink is running low on ink and most of whats left are the Negative Emotions within him alongside the especially strong panic that he usually feels when they get like this... dream would try to comfort him and try to say that itll work out in the end no matter what and that they just need to push through and that itll be okay like normal comforting words because dream is an empath and can sense feelings right,,i feel like its comforting in some cases but when things get Really Bad and especially when the main reserves of feelings that ink has are Negative, they heavily override his normal sense of self and i imagine they get a lot more. Snappy.... theres also the additional hc thingy of ink also really overexaggerating his feelings and overplaying them a lot for the sake of trying to feel more intensely (doesnt work, just drains him faster and will never truly feel natural to him...personally think that ink feels a lot of disconnect from his feelings) which could be considerably offputting to dream (though before adding swap to the group she thought it wass normal because she had only seen the fake pretend nice joy of the village influenced by her aura and not Genuine Feelings)

I think eventually through the years they would learn a lot from eachother...like with ink learning to be more naturally charismatic and dream learning to see past toxic positivity and have his perception on emotions change for the better (ie in learning that having different emotions are okay, so long as there is a balance)

id do alot more hcs but tbh what it boils down to is: toxic codependent yuri. intensely up and down relationship where theres an insane amount of love and attachment but also a lack of self from the both of them because they are only able to see themselves as a Thing to the other. Also exes who turned out to be besties. Thry got together and broke up wayyy before blue (they casually tell him stories about it and for the parts that he does know about he is horrified for.) Oh and they share hobbies and do parallel play alot. dream is more music oriented and can play the cello and flute. ink can play the ukelele but hes more familiar with drawing and painting duh. Also they have a garden. they love growing flowers but their favourites are sunflowers. Also have writing sessions together. Also may/may not also have beautiful princess disorder. (The both of them)

im so sorry this is so incoherrent but erm. yeah im very normal abt them (half of this stuff comes from oc projection the other half is like. Mental illness while in the shower tbh)

#feysanity #drink ship #dream x ink #ink sans #dream sans #undertale #utmv #undertale fanart #headcanons #nonnies :>#fumbles :>

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stevieharringtonwifeguy · 1 year

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yknow we do a lot of like stevie realising she's transfem bc of a dare or like robin telling her about queer stuff and having a 'you can do that?' moment, but now im thinking of stevie who figures it out entirely on her own and doesn't know how to tell anyone. like she doesn't fully have the words and even with robin it's like. one thing to be gay but gender stuff is a whole other level and she has no idea where she stands on that

but like, stevie who used to play with his mothers makeup as a child, whose parents would laugh at his antics until he got too old to be so childish, time to act like a Real Boy. and every time he's supposed to act like One Of The Boys he thinks of how it felt when his mom would do his hair for him and comment on how alike they looked, and how much better that felt, and he knows that isn't normal, and he has to be normal

but after the upside down that really seems to matter less. nothings fucking normal anymore, why should steve be? so she starts branching out a little. breaks into her mothers closet again, tries on all the clothes she left behind when she went on her latest trip. slowly amasses a decent collection of makeup by going to several different stores over the course of months with the excuse of 'oh my mom/girlfriend sent me to pick up x'. she doesn't do the Whole Deal often, in case nancy comes over or later in case the kids suddenly ask her to drive them somewhere. doesn't do anything that can't be removed in like three seconds. and she's definitely never telling anyone about this. she doesn't know anyone who would understand.

after starcourt, she wonders about telling robin sometimes. like sure, stevie doesn't like men but she's still like. some kind of queer. robins the only other queer person she knows (and yeah, robin turning her down bc she was only into girls did sort of hurt, but it wasn't robins fault bc she didn't know, and also it turned out stevie just didn't understand what actual friendship felt like so it was for the best anyway), so if she can't tell robin who can she tell?

but something always stops her. robins technically never done anything that makes stevie think she'd be mean about it, but there's something like imposter syndrome keeping her mouth closed. like she's not the right kind of queer. like robins being queer the good and honest way and stevies just being some kind of freak. and yeah, she knows it's dumb to think like that and robin would call her a dingus if she said it out loud, but it sits pretty heavy in her heart

so it's not until after vecna, when stevies on the eddie shift in the hospital and eddie says, while high on possibly every drug in the world, 'man i spent all that time trying to grow my tits and bats ate an entire boob in under five minutes' and stevie goes ??? what???? and eddie, still too high to self-censor, makes some comment like yeah they weren't huge but that black market estrogen i got was finally working its magic, definitely had like an a-cup. rest in peace. and stevies like why were you growing boobs?? 'bc girls are supposed to have boobs, man, keep up'

and eddie passes out again like five seconds later, but stevie just sits there watching her snore with her heart about to beat out of her chest because. holy shit. she's not the only one. eddie might understand, might be able to help her, if she was able to grow her own boobs. stevie would love to grow her own boobs. she'd stuffed some socks down a bra once and they looked lumpy as hell but even just the suggestion of a bust had almost brought her to tears.

and suddenly, looking at the sleeping form of the first person stevie has ever met that she's ever had this so intrinsic thing in common with, everything doesn't seem so scary

#steddie #transfem steve harrington #transfem eddie munson #platonic stobin #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #t4t steddie

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cleromancy · 3 months

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to me i dont think that nonserious physical injuries are real to jason at all like they barely register whether they're on him or on someone else, but to tim things like little cuts and scrapes are 1. concrete problems 2. that he can do something about, so they light up the center of his brain that goes "TIMMY FIX"

and it sincerely doesnt matter who it is who has the scrapes like tim by default is going to try to fix anything he perceives as within his power to fix. thats who he is thats what he does. like yeah he probably wouldnt go out of his way to do it for someone super evil like sionis or someone he, personally, really hates like digger harkness or if he happens to be really mad at that person right that minute but otherwise. at minimum hes making sure *somebody* sees to their minor injuries.

and i just :chinhands: i like to think about jason realizing that tim cares by default about it when something happens like jason cuts himself while chopping vegetables. like jason blows him off and tells him to calm down and tims like a dog with a bone when he feels the need so like no actually you're going to sit down and accept your bandaid and neosporin. and jasons so baffled like tim im a grown ass 20 or 30 year old man i can get my own band aid. but just having someone consistently notice and care about small hurts that not even jason notices or cares about

and its once again literally not bc jason is special. its just that tim by default cares about people and jason is, technically, people. bc tim is not at all a subscriber to jasons school of thought that people ever stop being people, therefore tim is not going to ever think jason should stop being treated like a person. but theres jason understanding that cerebrally and then there's being regularly confronted with the fact that if jason is careless and burns his hand by accident tims going to make him put his hand under cold water because that matters to him. that regular, automatic care about little things not even jason cares about. and jason going from bewilderment to mild irritation to understanding to 🥺🥺 to. inevitably kind of wanting to get hurt on purpose just to get more of that and also just to test to make sure its not a fluke. They

#dc #jaytim #this does obviously coexist with stuff like tim kicking jason in the bols for revenge #also 'jason is，technically，people' is from his own pov like.#its specifically illustrating that he doesn't expect to be treated like anyone else or cared about like anyone else #Unless he specifically makes himself a problem and forces ppl to notice his pain etc #jaytim text

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yuukei-yikes · 2 months

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what girls say: im fine

what girls think: while everyone in kagerou project gets proper focus surrounding the horrors of their eye powers, takane doesn't so she can stay silly goofy but her eye power is possibly one of the scariest ones to have. takane's eye power puts her through a liminal horror no one pays attention to just because the only thing jin thought to make her say was "this rulesssss!!!" but imagine you wake up one day and everything you knew and loved and were, is gone and ur stranded in a place where your current existence is pointless and empty. you can be everywhere but also nowhere, and not only that but the "person" who did that to you made sure to erase everything about your disappearance. but then you find 1 person who is living proof of your past life being real and you find a tiny bit of power to influence reality through him which means you found a purpose to life again but that purpose is entirely some guy and he's just kinda the worst but you're doing everything to keep him sane because in return that keeps YOU sane. and through it all ene always says yay i dont even care im soooo unbothered im totally ok with this even though it's also said [glossed over/mentioned/never given consideration] she did spend one entire year [in which she never slept or paused like a human because she's not human anymore] LOOKING DESPERATELY for her physical body. yet she still says yeah this is alright😃 when as a human one of the things we knew about her is that she represses her emotions (takane enomoto ❤️s denial) basically i want to study her post str brain under a microscope and i wish all this had been actually explored because it's insanely interesting and a fun bit of horror genre to kagepro i think went to waste (we still get horror with haruka and takane's story as a whole but i just wish takane's side was more explored). takane enomoto is terribly overlooked as a character despite technically being the face of the project😡

#kagevinnie #takane enomoto #kagenalysis

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jade-len · 3 months

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no but seriously though, let's say that you've never read svsss and proceeded to transmigrate into pidw as either sqq or one of bunhe's random npc shixiong/shijie. is there anything you guys would've done different from sy?

personally, if i knew that bunhe was going to literally become the embodiment of toxic masculinity, a dictator who collects women as if they were some coins, and a man who's overall just the product of the abuse cycle... i would try my damn hardest to prevent any of that lol.

but, for me, i would not promote a harem or bingge's fucked way of thinking. even if i just transmigrated as some other disciple, there would be absolutely no way i would let bunhe turn into bingge (also because.. why would i let the entire sect continue to abuse him). and, probably not even really bingmei as well? i don't know, i would obviously still protect and befriend him, but i think i'd be much more stricter about teaching bingbing morals, good ethics, mental health, all that jazz.

like, we live in a time where we actually know better about that stuff! might as well pass down our 20th century knowledge, y'know? i know sqq loves binghe the way he is, but if i read pidw i would most definitely not like bingge's character due to airplane's wack writing

(cut under is just me rambling lol)

but if i were to transmigrate as sqq... honestly, it would go two ways for me. genuinely, i think (after the ooc function) i'd just run away from the sect and take on a completely new appearance using magic airplane plant bullshit, find binghe (because i know damn well the abuse wouldn't just stop there.. also because the system will probably still demand for me to be some sort of mentor), then be like that one cool teacher or older brother figure? i'd definitely be more of that instead of a proper shizun. idk, i'd just treat binghe as if he were my little brother

or, since binghe is still bunhe and thus hasn't darkened at all, i would maybe pull him to the side and say that i'm actually not his shizun. probably claim that the real sqq hated teaching (which was why he abused binghe) and kids, so he made a doppelgänger (me) to replace him as he goes to buttfuck anywhere else from here. since i would know of luo binghe's loyalty at least from never having read svsss, i'd tell him to respect sqq's wishes

this is so that binghe would at least know that i'm not shen qingqiu. because remember, in this alternate timeline i only know pidw instead and don't know if binghe would forgive sqq for all the abuse he suffered, so don't blame me for going that route! again, i know that the system would still probably require me to be his mentor for the abyss arc, so i'd have to still stay as bingbing pretty much gets an entirely new person as his shizun. but hey, would he complain? i don't abuse kids and thus won't ever hurt him. plus, i don't think i'd be able to constantly put on a mask and pretend to be sqq, the least i could do is have luo binghe know the "truth"?

look i know that that probably breaks the system's rules, BUT remember, you can negotiate with the system. "well, i'm not revealing my identity as a transmigrator or the system? i'm technically still 'shen qingqiu', im supposed to be a doppelgänger, a copy! remember? so i'm technically him." also, i don't remember any rules about running away and such for the new identity plan, just that binghe still needs a mentor to push him off. i feel like with enough negotiation, i would be able to do this (also yes i know that i wouldn't know about the system not being strict, but i feel like i would figure it out pretty quickly, considering that i bitch a bit and will find a way to back up my argument if I'm really insistent)

speaking about the endless abyss!! yeah no i don't think i would be able to push him off. i think i'd make it abundantly clear that i don't want to, but i'm cursed to "fulfill" a prophecy or something.. either through a bunch of metaphors and stories. or, since system never said i had to full on betray him, just that he needed to be in there, i'd kinda just. tell him to jump and that there was nothing else i could teach him or something. i'll be waiting, bingbing!

and finally: what about if binghe fell in love? ...honestly don't know what i'd do with that. i feel like i'd be more gege material if anything since i'm not super different in age with bingbing, so i'd most likely see him as a friend or younger brother instead of a disciple (and i'd definitely treat him like one too. sorry, i just don't think i'd be able to take my job as a teacher or anything seriously, nonetheless actually teach teach. mentor-ish or bro figure, yeah i could do that. responsible teacher? okay, now you're asking for too much). so maybe? maybe not? i don't even know if i meet binghe's standards (which, admittedly, is kinda low but you get my point). i'd probably wanna kiss liu qingge though lol

#also yes i'd probably punt shang qinghua #or rat him out if he doesn't reveal being a transmigrator #try to avoid like. hundreds of kids dying from the abyss opening.#this is not to hate on sqq of course #im just curious to know what other people would have done #svsss #mxtx svsss #the scum villain's self saving system #danmei #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #luo bingmei #shen yuan #liu qingge #luo bingge #pidw

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matan4il · 22 days

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hi quick question: what do u know about the lavender ai post that's circulating? i saw it on this fact checking blog i follow and they made it seem legit but im not convinced

Hi Nonnie!

Before I get into this specific subject, I just wanna tell you that for me personally, this war has been an eye opener about how little some "fact checking" sites are worth. I've read several articles on that type of site, which could have used some fact checking themselves. In some cases, they had author names attached to them, and when checking the authors out, it was easy to find that they were not free of bias themselves. So... yeah. Take "fact checking sites" with a grain of salt. Even journalists sometimes get it wrong, and they're held to higher standards, and have more personal accountability, than most "fact checking sites," not to mention that the latter often simply rely on a selection of journalistic sources, but sometimes without really taking into account which are reliable, and which aren't.

As for the lavender AI issue specifically, I heard it briefly referenced on the news, during a discussion panel, and it was brought up in the context of recent conspiracy theories about Israel. The panelists were so clear on how obviously false these all were, they didn't even really get into refuting any of them.

A bit like how, in the past, when watching panelists discussing antisemitic tropes reincarnated as anti-Israel lies, I saw them bring up the one claiming Israel set up a field hospital in Haiti after the earthquake in order to harvest organs, which is obviously a new version of "the Jews are bloodthirsty" without bothering to refute it, because to Israelis, it's evident that it's bullshit. Not only because we're aware that we're not actually those evil creatures, lusting for death and destruction, that the anti-Israel crowd likes to portray us as, but also because we know that the constant terrorist attacks here have made Israel a world leader in the field of emergency medicine (here's an example: even the antisemitic UN had to admit an IDF unit was the best medical emergency team in the world), so that's the actual reason we set up that field hospital, much like we use our experience to help others in basically every disaster around the world that's willing to accept aid from Israel (and sometimes we operate even in places like Syria, where technically, we're defined as an enemy state, so all of the aid had to be provided directly to private people, and while keeping their identity a secret, so their own government can't presecute them for receiving it).

Anyway, since the TV discussion didn't get into refuting what they clearly saw as an absurd, hateful lie, I went online in search of more info, and found that this news venturing into mainstream media happened in The Guardian, a British news source known for its anti-Israel bias, to the point where a female black, non-Jewish journalist of theirs felt the need to point it out all the way back in 2003, and in Nov 2023, a Jewish employee of theirs had published a personal piece about feeling unsafe there, and looking for another place of employment. But the source that The Guardian is quoting, is actually not a proper journalistic publication, it's an anti-Israel propaganda blog based magazine, which includes Israeli anti-Zionists and Palestinians, publishing in English since its audience is very much not Israelis despite claiming that they want to inspire change in Israel, and responsible for systematically vilifying the country and spreading lies about it.

If I, as an Israeli, thought that something was wrong with a system the IDF is using, and wanted to see real change in my army, I wouldn't go to a publication that isn't journalistic in nature, that doesn't publish in a local language, that most Israelis have never heard about, and that those who did, don't trust, because of its known anti-Israel reputation. That in itself makes me suspicious.

The IDF gave a statement in response to questions presented by The Guardian, based on the aforementioned piece. It's a bit long, but here are the main references to the claimed AI system Lavender (emphasis added by me):

Some of the claims portrayed in your questions are baseless in fact, while others reflect a flawed understanding of IDF directives and international law.

The process of identifying military targets in the IDF consists of various types of tools and methods, including information management tools, which are used in order to help the intelligence analysts to gather and optimally analyze the intelligence, obtained from a variety of sources. Contrary to claims, the IDF does not use an artificial intelligence system that identifies terrorist operatives or tries to predict whether a person is a terrorist. Information systems are merely tools for analysts in the target identification process. According to IDF directives, analysts must conduct independent examinations, in which they verify that the identified targets meet the relevant definitions in accordance with international law and additional restrictions stipulated in the IDF directives.

The “system” your questions refer to is not a system, but simply a database whose purpose is to cross-reference intelligence sources, in order to produce up-to-date layers of information on the military operatives of terrorist organizations. This is not a list of confirmed military operatives eligible to attack.

For each target, IDF procedures require conducting an individual assessment of the anticipated military advantage and collateral damage expected. Such assessments are not made categorically in relation to the approval of individual strikes. The assessment of the collateral damage expected from a strike is based on a variety of assessment methods and intelligence-gathering measures, in order to achieve the most accurate assessment possible, considering the relevant operational circumstances. The IDF does not carry out strikes when the expected collateral damage from the strike is excessive in relation to the military advantage. In accordance with the rules of international law, the assessment of the proportionality of a strike is conducted by the commanders on the basis of all the information available to them before the strike, and naturally not on the basis of its results in hindsight.

The IDF outright rejects the claim regarding any policy to kill tens of thousands of people in their homes.

Some things about the claims in that piece don't work out IMO. Like, the number of fatalities if indeed there's an AI system, which produced a list of 37,000 Hamas and PIJ terrorists, with an automatic green light to kill between 15 to 100 civilians per each, especially in the first months of the war, and even assuming they couldn't target them all during that period of time (we do know most Hamas units have been destroyed). There are about 1,500 terrorists in a Hamas battalion (source in Hebrew), and 4 are left in Rafah, so only about 6,000 Hamas terrorists are in the last area the IDF has not operated in yet. That would mean roughly 31,000 terrorists were accessible targets. Just for the sake of erring on the side of caution, let's assume 10 killed civilians per Hamas terrorist, instead of that piece's claimed 15-100 approved per target. This would produce somewhere around 341,000 people killed in the first months alone. Let's go even lower, let's say 5 civilians killed per terrorist instead of 15-100. That would mean 186,000 killed during those months. We are exactly 6 months into the war, and even Hamas' numbers (likely inflated) don't claim more than 33,000 as the total number of fatalities. The given numbers and directives in that so-called "article" just don't match the reality on the ground, but claim to explain it, and to prove that Israel is being callous with civilians' lives in Gaza.

I'll also add that the AI-based decision making described doesn't take into account the possible presence and harm to the lives of Israeli hostages held captive in Gaza. That's another thing that makes me doubt that piece, because the IDF commanders have repeatedly stated their commitment to bringing back all the hostages, and as many alive as possible, and Israeli soldiers more than once risked their own lives to get them out, whether it was living people, or the bodies of Israelis who deserve to get to be buried back home, with their loved ones there, as in tact as possible. This scenario only works if we assume the Israeli commanders and soldiers have no sentiment for the lives of their own kidnapped civilians.

I guess that's what the piece's aim is. To play on people's fears of AI determining whether people will live or die, and to paint Israel as an evil, unfeeling, bloodthirsty entity, capable of anything, including of the inhumanity of letting computers decide the fate of human beings. The ease and speed with which people believe this, and spread this notion, before anyone has verified that Lavender is anything other than a database, just like the IDF says, feels like a demonstration of how all antisemitic blood libels are spread.

I hope this helped!

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

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bestjeanistmonster · 5 months

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How did dc au sonic and shadow meet? Was it like Harley Quinn where they met while sonic was Nicky in Arkham? Where Harley was one of the only nice people there to ivy . Or was it like animated series where they just knew of each other due to reputation?

It was a mix of both!

Sonic and Shadow met like they did in the original batman animated series

Sonic had screwed up and gotten kicked out by Eggy onto the streets, leaving him to fend for himself so out of spite he goes on a solo heist to steal the ‘harlequin diamond’ from a museum

Telling himself that he’s doing it for himself and no one else but he’s doing it to like prove himself to Eggy (even though he technically ‘out’ he’s still very much brainwashed and doesn’t really have a purpose or sense of self besides serving Eggy in, so even though he was kicked out Eggman knows that when he calls he’ll just come running back)

Sonic was real stealthy, dodging laser sensors, security cameras and then using as tool to carve a circle in the glass case that had the diamond in it and he’s so close-

Then the alarm starts blaring like crazy and a black and red hedgehog slides into the room holding onto something and runs through all the laser sensors

And Sonic’s like wtf????

Then he's just like, "fuck it", breaks the glass steals the diamond and runs in the same direction as the guy with the security guards after them and he hears police sirens already from outside

He finds a hiding place and then he's face to face with the guy that tripped the alarm

"Nice job tripping the alarm, why don't ya turn on the bat-signal while you're at it?!"

"You think i wanted to get caught?!!"

"Coulda fooled me!"

They have a mini fight before security show up and they’re forced to work together to evade capture, they escape off into the night on Shadow bike (the only reason Shadow didn’t leave him behind was cuz he didn’t want this guy tattling on him if he got arrested)

They get to a temp base of shadow’s and catch their breath, Shadow recognises Sonic as Eggman's right hand and is immediately on edge but Sonic is like, "me and the Doc are kinda having a rough time at the moment, so im kinda on my own rn, im sure it’ll blow over though.” He said with a nervous smile

Now when they had physically fought earlier Shadow was surprised to see that this clown actually posed a bit of a challenge for him. Shadow usually didn’t care what people thought about themselves or others, but with Sonic being the only person he’s met to actually give him a good fight and to hear him talk so low of himself actually came off as an indirect insult towards Shadow and he would not stand for slander

So Shadow ends up saying smthn like, "Look imma be honest but you’re a bit of a doormat and squandering your potential so much that it's pissing me off a lil bit." Then takes him with him on a city wide rampage to kinda build up that self esteem and give the guy a bit of independence

And from there the rest is history

Nicky and Shadow met during the internship

The first was when Nicky had to ask him some questions about eggman cuz he was in group therapy with Eggman until Eggy killed the psychiatrist and wanted to know if there was something, anything that he could further ask Eggman about so he could use it to get Eggman open up more during their interviews

To get him to go away Shadow told him the little he knew

Then Nicky returned a week and a half later thank him

Nicky: Dr Eggman fessed up, thanks to you

Shadow: I didn’t do anything.

Nicky: (raises eyebrow) you told me about his grandfather

Shadow: that was barely information. I wouldn’t have even told you about it if you were going to be so smug about it

Nicky: (shrugs) eh like it or not you helped me (slips plant cutting into the food delivery box) everyone needs help sometime, and since you wanna wipe humans from the face of the earth…

Shadow: (picks up clipping) so what? You cut a *plant* for me? I could kill you with this.

Nicky: (smiles and walks away from cell) yeah. I guess you could.

Shadow:…

Nicky had read his file before talking to him and in the notes it said that Shadow felt more comfortable around plants due to the nature of his biology and abilities

Shadow has a cell in Arkham with zero plants around just in case he got out of that power restricting collar they made all of the inmates wear and raised hell

So Nicky giving Shadow that plant cutting was him doing Shadow a solid for helping him out with this even though there is a risk of that collar coming off and him breaking out, cuz if he didn’t manage to get it off Nicky supposed that he’d still feel more at ease in his cell with a plant around

Shadow didn’t realise they were the same person till prison roll call

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic #sth #sonadow harlivy au #jeanist answers

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choccy-milky · 1 month

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1. your fic is absolutely amazing. Have been bingeing it and I’m literally obsessed. The way you write just itches my brain in such a good way, literally cannot contain my love and appreciation for your work👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 cheers to you!!! Can’t wait to keep reading

2. As I was reading I found out you also deadass drawing the art to go w/ the fic?? Literally you’re living my dream 😭 plus your art is so so so well done!!!!! It’s added so much joy to my reading experience

Cannot wait to see what else you have in store!!’ Hope you have an amazing, AMAZING day, week, year, etc.!!!! 💞🙌🏻🫶🏻

OMG IM GONNA CRY 😭😭 BAHAHA U SENT THIS AT SUCH A CRAZY MOMENT cuz i just checked my ao3 comments and was down about a rude comment i got, and then i come to tumblr and like, a few mins later/literally AS i was venting about it, u send this BAHAHA your choccy senses were tingling. IM SO GLAD U LIKE IT THO AND THAT YOURE ENJOYING IT (and my drawings, even if youve defs seen spoilers by now BAHHA) hope u have a good day too, u defs brightened mine!! THANK UUUU💖💖💖

@kaviary-blog this looks so funny bc i censored u just to keep it (mostly) spoiler free BUT AW THANK U DAMN IM HONOURED THAT MY FANFIC WAS THE ONE TO MAKE YOU CRY?? IM SO HAPPY HOW INVESTED YOU ARE 😭😭💖💖 im also super happy with that chap and its so satisfying like you said to finally be able to tie of all those threads so IM GLAD IT WAS WORTH IT💖

@lovesicklovermia ONE DAY???? OMG. FIRST TWO DAYS NOW ONE?? ITS JUST GETTING SHORTER AND SHORTER. next thing i know someones gonna be like yeah so i took some highly experimental drug that lets me read at 1000% the pace of a normal person, and i finished ur fic in 2 hours 😍omg loved it!!!😍😍 BAHAHAHA but omg i totally see what u mean, they do HAHA. AND THANK U💖💖 IM GLAD UR LIKING IT💖

YEAH so in my fic fifth years are 16, and by the time things get....explicit....clora and seb are 17. im not against consuming media with teenagers depicted in sexual situations like euphoria or riverdale or w.e else bc i get that its fiction and these are just real things that happen so its fine to write about them, but their canonical ages of 15 was still too young for me and i wanted them to be 17 before it got the E rating (which is why clora and sebs birthdays end up being so close, bc i was RUSHING for them to turn 17 BAHAHHAA)

BAHAHA clora and seb secretly being together is like the most poorly kept secret in my fic, like im sure her parents technically KNOW, but due to old fashioned traditions and whatnot (and it being 1891) seb wants to be able to propose properly and with a proper ring, bc clive is intimidating and he doesnt wanna just be like "yeah so im dating your daughter and weve already fucked and i plan to marry her" LOOL he wants to do things properly and be with her with her dads permission(even tho its a bit late for that HAHA) BUT WE CAN JUST PRETEND. tldr its basically just out of some sense of chivalry on sebs side, a fear of her dad, and wanting to do things right LOL

ALSO WAIT OMG STOPPPPP I WAS LITERALLY JUST ABOUT TO POST THIS BUTI HAVE TO INCLUDE THIS NOW

YOU SAW MY POST AND IMMEDIATELY DREW THIS AS A RESPONSE WHILE IN CLASS?? BAHAHAHA IM ACTUALLY SO TOUCHED RN IM TEARING UP WTF THATS SO SWEET OF YOU WTFFFFFFFFF THANK YOU SO MUCH😭😭😭💖💖 (NOW PAY ATTENTION IN CLASS!!🤬🤬)

#ask #rude comment?? forgotten. coke zero?? SLURPED #the irony of drawing CLORA in class bc she would disapprove and want u to pay attention BAHAHAH

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oleander-nin · 4 months

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hi! for the yandere turtles, is there any chance of the reader de-yanderifying them over time? like teaching them healthy boundaries and stuff? love ur writing btw <3

Im not sure if this is was supposed to be a request or not, but since my requests are technically closed, I'm just going to answer it 'normally'. Sorry it took a while for me to answer, I was trying to figure out how to go about it. Merry Christmas y'all.

It got kinda long so I put it under a cut-

I personally think theoretically yes, but I will personally not write it(at this time. Feelings change or there mught be a good request idk). In no way, shape, or form do I think the yandere genre should be painted in a good light, and to me, this feels like it could be. The idea of de-yanderefying someone feels too close to the "I can fix them" mindset, and I personally hate that because to me, it seems like someone could try and argue that this behavior is more or less excusable. To me, this falls into the same area as "Yandere (Y/n)/Reader", which is another trope im uncomfortable with as it feels more like its being acted out for some reason. Obviously, I wrote one of those, so no, I don't actually think it's the same as actually being yandere or some other sick and twisted mindset in real life. Now I'm not trying to sit up on a high horse and condem people who like this trope, sometimes I think it's written well and I do like it, it's just not something I plan on dipping my toes in at this moment in time.

Now to actually answer the question, it really depends on both the scenario, how 'extreme' you're going with the yandere, how long it would take, and how much they're 'de-yanderefied'. Take Mikey for example. I usually try to portray him as delusional and someone who snaps once, and that 'snap' is what turns him fully yandere rather than just toxic. While you could definitely over time get him back to toxic, he can always snap again and he will never be considered a 'normal' relationship. You can only try and break down someone's inner personality so much, and if that toxicity is built into them like in most yandere fiction, I don't believe you could fully revert someone like that to meet societies standards of a normal, functional relationship. Although, this is fiction, so yeah you could definitely. It might just be hard to justify and plan correctly because of the mental hoops yanderes have to jump through to justify their immense abuse and toxicity.

Feel free to debate me on this if you have like, a vastly different opinion, but in my mind you can't really change someone? usually at least. Abusers abuse others and cheaters usually keep cheating. to me, someone who's 'de-yanderefied' is just a yandere waiting to snap again.

TL;DR - Yes, but I don't want to write it.

#asks <3 #tw yandere #cw yandere #also thankies for the compliement #it means a lot

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femmesandhoney · 3 months

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controversial, maybe, but im so tired of games where the romanceable options are ALL bisexuals. like, yeah, nice, but can we get just one lesbian? characters that are only romanceable if the protagonist is a woman, or a man? do they think we're going to get mad if there is locked off characters?? i remember jade empire, which is a questionable game in the romance aspect, but there's both straight and bisexual women on it: if you play as a female character, you have less options than the male one. WHY can't we have a lesbian version of this? of course, there's also a lot to do with the public that bg3 appeals to (men) but it is frustating. i just cant believe karlach and shadowheart AREN'T lesbians. like this is insane

karlach and shadowheart should have been lesbians like i feel it's almost really obvious that they're more into women and it feels like it wants to hint to the player that thats the case, but since the player can be a male and romance them they're "technically" bi. but they just so feel like lesbian women lmao, it's an insult that male characters can romance them tbh. i don't play too many games much less games like rpgs that allow romance, so i wasn't even aware some games had mechanics that limited romance options based on the players chosen sex, i think that's really cool actually since it also helps make the romance-able characters feel like real characters with personality and individual traits, such as their sexualities, that the player is "interacting with" and has repercussions on the players experience (in a neutral way).

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weebsinstash · 11 months

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so with a platonic yandere (or yanderes) how does it work, do you just never get the chance to have a romantic relationship, do they force/encourage you into one with someone 'approved' like a family friend or someone 'in the know' sort of thing, or do their feelings change or border on the romantic side as well?

Well, I find for me personally it often depends on the character themselves for like, what kind of relationship im looking for, or, yeah sometimes i just switch it up based on concept, sometimes i get a real specific idea that stays in my brain and I can go back and forth depending on, I guess, preference. It's kind of a recent-ish development for me to think of platonic yandere AT ALL since like 99% of the time my brain goes "well if they don't love you romantically or want to fuck you what is THE POINT"

And it kind of took me a while to realize that sometimes "the point" of platonic yandere can be that they technically "don't get anything back". If they scoop you up and force therapy on you, it's because they want to legitimately help you, not to say a romantic/sexual yandere wouldn't, but for a platonic one it's more I guess "selfless" because they aren't like, getting a spouse or a fuck buddy out of it. With a platonic yandere, they don't want you to hook up with that guy because, yeah they're jealous you're not spending time with THEM but its like, spending time watching movies or going to the park or playing video games, spending time with you as you, doing potentially anything, but also they have you up on this pedestal and the guy is just an insignificant little worm to them. He thinks he can date THEIR sister? Creep creep go to jail eat dirt go six feet under here's a shovel start digging

I can be so moody and contextual about the whole thing, like for example, I've been making a lotta posts about a purely platonic yandere Batfamily with Bruce as you know the patriarch and all that, basically becoming a father figure to you even if you're already an adult, where he is like emphatically "no, Reader is your sibling, S I B L I N G" and getting out the batbottle and spraying them like cats any time he may notice anyone in his house catching feelings for you, but i also thought about, (this is kind of an AFAB specific idea sorry) what if Damian specifically developed one of those weird "big sister when i grow up im gonna marry you" complexes and Bruce is NOT having it when suddenly Damian hits him with "but FATHER, if I'M Reader's husband when I come of age, then our offspring will be YOUR biological grandchildren" and Bruce finds himself sitting there suddenly vividly picturing you holding a fat little newborn with a big head of black hair and smiling up at him "dad come hold your grandson 🥰" and he's. He's gone, like, suddenly he can't see it any other way. OBVIOUSLY Damian is the perfect husband for you, Bruce is helping raise him? Who would make a better spouse for his adopted daughter than his ACTUAL son? Talk about keeping it in the family

In his eyes, his son would make a more than competent husband once he comes of age, especially considering not only is Damian his son but, extremely similar to Bruce himself; broody angsty genius with superhuman skills, intelligence, athleticism, etc. And if not Damian, isn't Dick lowkey his favorite child, and also, you know. Already an adult and not nearly as emotionally constipated 😅 Bruce can trust either one of them to take care of you, building off of a paranoia that any place outside his family and his home is fraught with danger and anyone who hasn't been explicitly vetted by him suddenly cannot be trusted in your presence

I keep finding myself drifting back to platonic yandere but only in like, almost extremely specific circumstances, like for real those age regression ideas i realized are coming from like DEEP places of trauma and rejection for me and feeling like I'm so permanantly damaged i literally need a do over and need to be all but remade from scratch, being helped when i was younger and at my lowest points in childhood, and I'll admit I've noticed most of these platonic yandere ideas usually revolves around aspects of family, fatherhood, childhood, etc. Like literally right off the top of my head, two characters who kind of got the platonic yan ball rolling were Stolas from Helluva Boss and Nolan Grayson from Invincible, both of them fathers. Of course I would absolutely let Nolan tear this ass up too though as you guys have seen, like i find the Viltrumite Reader concepts kind of keep fluctuating between "he wants to mentor you and then catches feelings" to "no he just wants to be your dad and Viltrum mentor and after your real family dies during some kind of monster attack he just straight up adopts you and moves you into his house and the government lets him bc, i mean, they need to keep an eye on you as a Viltrumite"

Of course I also like the idea of sort of a middle ground. You know, like, the yandere begins purely platonic without any sort of intentions but it develops into something deeper after they've already come to know you and you trust them, or even, they're actually totally 100% "a normal person" and something happens to you or them where they suddenly become yandere. Like imagine you know someone for like a couple years and then all of a sudden, they're acting differently. So I've also thought about, Bruce and Reader are work friends in the Justice League and his feelings begin as purely protective and platonic and he knows you for a decent chunk of time but when he starts getting to know you more personally, more details about you the person under the costume, maybe he eventually realizes he's getting extremely jealous watching you interact with other men and, maybe in the process of taking care of you his feelings change. You get wounded on the job and you don't have any family to help provide any care while you're still extremely weak and recovering and he's helping you and that's when he suddenly realizes "oh shit this line of work is so dangerous, he doesn't want you to die, he doesn't want anyone to die but like you most specifically, he doesnt want you doing this anymore" and maybe he brings you to the manor for recovery and you never wind up leaving

But typically yes, as you suggested, usually when I've picked a character to be a platonic yandere it's because I can see them being overly protective to the point they won't let you date at all, even if the specific reasons for WHY may change. Like hypothetically for some of the ideas I've had, Stolas doesn't want you to date or have sex period because he's kind of Goin Through Some Shit and this is kind of like his second go around of being a dad and him expressing some sort of trauma or guilt over Octavia and he sees you as His Extra Special Little Girl and you don't get so much as a kiss on the cheek with another person until like, he's had enough years with you to be satisfied with "your childhood" kwim. Or a yandere who declares themselves as your sibling not completely against you dating or all that but they just have EXTREMELY high standards. like lmao imagine, like, someone like Deku basically inserting himself in your life as your brother and you're like "ok fuck dude, who do you think WOULD be worthy of dating me" and he's just like "I guess someone like All Might!" Like bro that platonic obsessive little twink is NEVER letting you get laid, you suck off ONE dick and he's holing up in his room CRYING because "someone's defiled his baby sister and made her dirty" not in the sense that he like doesn't like you anymore or he's judging YOU but in his mind your "purity" has been tainted by someone else and the only solution is to like, kill/get rid of that person and "atone" by never letting it happen again, cause obviously by letting you suck that guy off Izuku FAILED YOU, and maybe at some point he snaps and you wake up from one of your mandatory sibling cuddle sessions and he's pressed way too closely to you as he declares he's the only one worthy of you and he's sorry he didn't realize HE'S the husband you needed

Really I'm just a creepy little freak and it can depend on how I'm needing or craving to feel accepted in that particular moment in time 😅

#GOD am i on this batman justice league shit so hard #i grew up with shows like teen titans and spiderman and jla #like god if yall follow my main blog weve been discussing how i probably have a cluster b personality disorder #and ive felt. so extremelt sad and broken. bc those can form from early childhood trauma #so lmao i keeo finding mysekf drift8ng back to thise age regression ideas where. i get fixed #i either get the care i needed as a kid or i get completely reset back to before anything ever happened #and raised in you know. a questionably psychotic protective little bubble #i have issues and apparently i will always have issues lmaoooi #yandere stuff #sinprompts

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