Tumgik
#he was probably so lonely in those years before he died
roger-paladino · 1 year
Text
Feeling so normal about Roger before I passed out I started writing a full timeline for his life
7 notes · View notes
rosie-writings · 28 days
Text
For Just a Moment I'm Whole Again
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Request: anon—ghost!Reader falls in love with Colby
Summary: ghost!Reader finds out that her twin flame is Colby who was born decades after she died, and upon meeting him for the first time, she needs his help to usher her on to the afterlife to be free from the purgatory she roams.
Warnings: ghost!Reader x Colby smut, Age Gap, Bittersweetness, light Angst, Fluff, and Twin Flame relationship
Words: 6.6k
No Y/N Use
Title from 'Calcutta' by Sleep Token
A/N: Technically, Reader is 19 while Colby is 27, however she died nearly thirty years before he was born, so who's older?
Tumblr media
I stopped crying about it a few years ago.
Maybe a decade or two, I wasn’t quite sure. It’s not that I was upset about how I died, I almost forgot the pain of it all, I was upset because out of everywhere I could have died, it was in a house. 
A lonely house.
After I died, apparently my friends were too traumatized to keep the house, so they sold it. I tried to get their attention. Everyday I tried to convince them that purgatory was real and they forced me into it by leaving. What was I supposed to do alone in a house that no one wanted to buy because a death occurred?
When I found out that they also rumored to their realtor that it was haunted, I wanted to slap the lives out of them. Of course it was haunted; that was your best friend trying to get you to look at me for once before I could never see you again—
I cried for years.
No one bought the house.
I slept in the king sized bed in the room upstairs alone and cold.
There was a hotspot in the middle of the house. 
The house was built upon a particular mineral that ushered in traveling ghosts, and the convenient vortex in the center of it aided their arrival. Occasionally I met other ghosts and other inhuman beings that couldn’t care less about me. They probably had millennia of experience navigating the afterlife’s purgatory on earth while I was only a couple decades old.
I think I died in 1971. I couldn’t remember. 
The day this house was bought, I thought I was saved.
Instead, major renovations took place. They ripped the nostalgic wallpapers off the walls and tore out the carpets that my human and ghostly feet were all too familiar with.
”How about you chose an actually appealing pint this time, motherfucker,” I spat at the contractor who walked right through me in the main hallway upstairs. I rolled my eyes and followed him into the primary suite.
Today was the day they renovated my bedroom.
”I wonder how many years it’s been; you look fucking weird. Do all men have that silly ass haircut or something now?” I asked as I sat on top of the ladder in the middle of the room. “Thanks so much for bringing your tool batteries in here. You don’t need those do you?” I felt their powerful buzzing. I felt the electricity waving through the room and I sucked it all up.
With every minute that passed, I felt stronger and stronger, until.
”Oops—“ I sighed in boredom as I knocked a paint can off the top of the ladder.
The worker whirled around with wide eyes and basically looked at me in mine, but he saw through me. I rolled my eyes again.
“You humans are all the fucking same. God, I was so damn embarrassing as a human. Can’t you at least try to talk to me? I’m so fucking—“
His co-worker called his name and walked in the room.
”What the fuck have you done?” The second shouted. White paint pooled on the concrete below me.
”At least you didn’t put floor in yet—“
”It just-It just fell! I didn’t even touch it! I put it up there like 20 minutes ago and-and it just fell!” The second worker grumbled and picked up the emptying can.
”They said there was some poltergeist activity in this house which is why it took fucking 50 years for it to be sold again.”
50 years?
My lack of heart nearly fell through the floor. 
I sat on the ladder looking through them this time. 50 years? I was stuck here for 50 years with nothing to do? No one to talk to? I wanted to cry. Ghost cry sessions weren’t as satisfying as human cry sessions.
I had to get out of here.
I had to—
I stole the energy from all their equipment, but it was still not enough. Even with the electromagnetic energy pulsing through my spirit, the hotspot wouldn’t take me. 
“Come on,” I grumbled. I looked through the vortex and saw spirals and spirals of unveiled spirits traveled through this purgatory called earth, and yet none would grab on to me. What was beyond? “Please! Take me! Get me out of here!” 
I broke down crying again. 
This was the biggest chance I had in order to leave and not even it was enough.
I curled up in the middle of the floor there and cried until I fell asleep.
Later, when the sun was high in the sky and the house was vacant, I woke up. 
As I stood, I appeared in the master bedroom so I could sleep in the bed—
“What the fuck?” I asked to nothing.
The walls were white, the flooring was finished with deep warm floorboards, and the bed frame was a plush cream color with a creamy duvet. 
“They did this fast. I wonder how long I was asleep for.” There was a dresser, two nightstands, and a desk that all matched in a deep brown, practically black, wood finish. “We go 50 years in the future just to be completely devoid of all color. Jesus fuck.” I curled up in the bed regardless. “Oh my god,” I moaned loudly. “Actually, I take all that back. I will give up any color in my life to feel this mattress if only for a second. This is how technology should be used, oh my god…” 
I don’t remember finishing my sentence, I fell unconscious again.
I woke up to the sound of voices. 
I shot to the foyer in a blink of an eye and I saw a family. A mom, a dad, three kids, and a dog, and I nearly cried on sight.
”Hello! Oh my god, yes thank everything good and mighty. You bought this house? I’m not alone anymore!” The dad walked through me. “I’m so excited—Oh my god your dog is so cute!” I fell to my knees in front of the Husky and it howled a talking fit at me, and when I raised my hand to pet it, it ran away from me so fast that it slid across the floor on its nails. “I’m not that scary, I don’t think,” I sighed and stood up again.
There was a girl, probably fifteen or sixteen, who walked right past me with something in her hands.
”Oh what’s that?” I asked as I followed her. The rectangle in her hand illuminated back at her like a TV screen and her thumbs furiously typed on some kind of keyless keyboard. “Holy shit! Is that one of those phones that all the futuristic movies talked about? We have them in the real world now?” I nearly screamed. I plopped into a vacant barstool next to her. “I would have loved that,” I grumbled. I devised a plan to steal it from her in her sleep and play with it all night. 
I watched as she turned it on again.
”A passcode?” I questioned and I was ready to memorize it, but suddenly a blue light scanned down her face and it unlocked by itself. “Now that’s—“ I got out of my seat and backed up from her. “That’s weird. Can that detect ghosts?” 
“Come on! Let’s go in the pool!” I gasped when the younger boy ran right through me and out the backdoor. I smiled when he cannon balled in the pool out back. 
“Lukas! It is 40 degrees outside, get your ass in the house now!” His mother screamed, and I laughed.
“Oh yeah, they put so many cool pool toys in the chest out there,” I told him as I stepped foot outside. “You would love them in the summer though. It’s pretty cold—“
I must have walked too far out of the house, because in a blink of an eye, I teleported back in the middle of the vortex.
”God help me,” I sighed, and I started to devise my game plan to get into that girl’s device in the night.
It wasn’t easy. 
The moon was high in the sky, and I walked in the girl’s bedroom cautiously. Not like she could see me, but I could make noises and I didn’t want to scare her.
Her phone lay on the table next to her bed with a cord coming from it, and she slept soundlessly next to it. I picked it up. 
It illuminated to life and I gasped. I read the time and date.
2:35am, December 20, 2021
”Oh.. my god…” I whispered slowly.
2021? That wasn’t a real year. It had been 50 years that I was—
How was I going to get out of here? I needed out. First I needed this girl’s device. I grabbed it, and when it scanned my face, it said it was the incorrect Face ID.
I pointed it at the girl cautiously, and after a few recalculating aims, it unlocked. I brought it back to me and saw so many colors I didn’t know which to tap first. The entire screen responded to my touch.
I flicked through the squares on the screen and with each one, I read more and more paragraphs about people. It looked like the news or something. I couldn’t believe how amazing this device was at taking photos. 
“I don’t understand,” I whispered. The squares where it seemed like I could communicate with other people intimidated me; I didn't understand who I was talking to so I tried to get out of it and go back to the original place where all the squares were. I accidentally swiped and it moved the screen and I tapped out of it. That was how you got out of it, got it.
I found another app that was red. I clicked it. This time photos with short captions were the only things I scrolled through. After a second, I clicked one to make it larger, but instead, it brought me to another screen and a video began playing.
The audio was so loud and clear, I gasped and tried to figure out how to silence it. The girl disturbed next to me. The button I clicked turned the volume down.
A video played of the same photo I clicked on—
Those weren’t photos, they must have been paused videos or something. I watched and listened and it was actually entertaining. After the video ended, I clicked another.
And then another.
And before I knew it, the sun peeked over the horizon. The time read 7:30am. I had been watching these videos for five hours. 
I put the phone down and walked out of the room. 
I would have loved 2021.
I did it again the next night.
I sat there on the floor against the nightstand and watched more videos. 
Video after video, I started to remember the names of the people who posted them. I didn’t remember the rabbit trail I went down; recommended video after recommended video led me to one that made me stop my jumping around.
It was a video of two idiotic boys messing around in a haunted house.
Now, I never was into haunted or spooky things when I was alive, and being dead now, I would say that I had a pretty large say in and experience in what these boneheads talked about. 
I didn’t expect them to be so respectful. And considerate, too.
I watched as they talked to spirits in the house, and it was startling to watch humans interact with us spirits from their perspective. I forgot that that was all they saw.
I forgot how limited I was when I was trapped in my human skin.
How silly they were; it didn’t matter that they would have been seven years older than I was. Most of the people were children on YouTube, and they were the worst of them. 
Sam and Colby certainly made me laugh, and their means of communicating with ghosts even more so. 
There were some videos that scared me.
I liked the two a lot, and I didn’t want them to get hurt or manipulated by demonic forces. I had seen demonic forces firsthand, and humans were stupid enough to summon them. If I was afraid of them, humans definitely should have been.
The way they assumed everything was as sinister as they did made me laugh the most because the majority of spirits communicated with them were teasing them and cracking jokes. The boys took everything too seriously, but that was why they were so good.
They cared.
But one of them, Colby, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of. It was like I knew him. Warmth spread through me, and for the first time since I died, I was overcome with the need to leave. The pull teased me, beckoned me. 
I was over forty years older than him; I would have never met him, so how did I know him? 
Why did I need him?
I needed someone who cared about me like they did for spirits. I needed a human who cared to come in and help me. Certainly there were other humans out there who could help me like Sam and Colby, but they definitely weren’t as loud or had as much faith as they did in their capabilities. 
I would be lying if I said I didn’t cry when that family left the house two days later. It wasn’t because I would be lonely again but because I couldn’t drown myself in Sam and Colby’s videos. 
Or in Colby’s appearance and voice.
Hopefully someone else would stay for a week and I could use their phones to watch YouTube again.
Two weeks later, the house was booked again.
I finally learned that the house I was trapped in was turned into something called an AirBnb and I supposed that it was a house rented like a hotel. 
The same routine spun into effect.
A new visitor spent the week here, I drained their batteries in everything they brought, I drowned myself in YouTube (to be honest, I drowned myself in the force that was Colby’s voice), and spent endless time spinning around the house in boredom wondering when the human chosen to save me would come.
They would come and help one day, I knew it.
Tumblr media
The front door opened. 
I was out of the bed in a flash and appeared in the foyer to see the new visitors. Two men walked in the house, and I wondered what on earth they were up to for arriving near two in the morning. 
It was three years after I first learned what YouTube and social media was. I was ingrained in the politics, culture, society, and hyper-communicative world that was 2024. 
I toed the fence. I couldn’t decide whether I wanted to stay here and live as a free spirit in 2024 forever or be taken into the next spiritual realm. I knew I couldn’t stay forever, and with every year that passed, I felt the fabrics of my spirit being taken away into nothing. 
I needed help.
When I came spirit to face with the two new visiting men, my entire world flipped upside down.
I knew them.
They were the ones with the YouTube channel. 
They were—
”I know we said we would do some stuff before we go to sleep, but I literally—“
”No, I know,” the other sighed. “I’m so tired too. We got here a lot later than we planned.”
”We should just sleep then wake up a bit earlier than we planned to have more time to do what we couldn’t now.” The other nodded lazily.
”Yeah, we can do that.”
”Night, Colby,” said the blond one as he walked up the stairs.
”Night, Sam,” said the one I stood next to in between the foyer and the living room.
If I had a heart, it would have pumped loudly in my ears, and if I had a tongue, it would have dried up. Ever so slowly, I turned and looked at Colby as he pulled things from the backpack he had placed on the couch. His back faced me. 
And I couldn’t control myself, the intrusive thoughts won. I wondered what he would do if I—
At the sound of his water bottle crashing into the hardwood floor, Colby whirled around with wide eyes and watched as it rolled to a stop.
“What the fuck?” He whispered. I gasped when he walked through me. I turned and watched as he picked it up and placed it back on the table. He watched it.
With a smile, I didn’t take my gaze off his face as I knocked it back onto the floor. He took two steps back. 
That was when the realization dawned on me. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. When I felt him, when I was near him, it made sense. The pieces shoved together painfully.
“Uh… Sam?” Colby called. 
“What?” He called cautiously as he came from his room. “What’s wrong?”
”I—I swear to god, this water bottle fell off the table deliberately. Like someone knocked it over, twice.”
”Really?” He asked hesitantly when his feet hit his floor. At this point, they both stood in front of me and I crossed my arms in boredom. I was nearly as tall as the two; they were a lot smaller in person.
I was tall for a girl; almost five foot nine.
He placed the water bottle back down.
I stared at it. Humans were so dumb. I watched their anticipation knowing full well I wouldn’t satisfy them. 
“What is happening, I swore it happened and it’s not now which means it’s not like the table is slanted or something.”
”That’s weird,” Sam said. 
“You can go back to bed, sorry—“
”No, you’re fine, stupid,” Sam laughed as he went back.
Of course when he was halfway up the stairs with his back turned I yanked it off the table. Colby already left to the couch though, and so when Sam turned around quickly, he froze when he realized Colby was completely out of reach.
”See? I told you!” Colby cried.
”Oh shit… Yeah I have no idea how to explain that.”
”Wanna get a rem pod and the camera or something?” Colby asked.
“Maybe if something else happens.”
”Okay, okay,” Colby said, and I watched in surprise when Sam walked back to his room. They must have been tired then.
That didn’t mean I couldn’t mess with Colby until he went to sleep.
”You guys are idiots,” I said as if I expected a response. “Are you actually staying up or are you—oh,” I gasped when he turned around and walked through me before I could react. He picked up his bag and walked up the stairs. I sighed. 
“That answers that.”
I peeked around the door. Colby stood in his room. I watched as he situated the things from his backpack. Those were some fancy cameras, small ones for that matter, and it looked like he charged the batteries. My eyes couldn’t pull from his skin though. He only wore his black jeans.
He turned towards me and I watched as he walked to the desk in his room. I intently focused on his face and his tattoos. He was so pretty. But he looked so different. I walked into the room and stood at the desk with him.
”What are these?” I asked and I touched the devices on the desk. Then, I gasped as his hand went through mine. My hand paused and I tried to feel the warmth. What would have been my hand burned with warmth, and I didn’t pull it away. 
Colby froze in his place and stared at his hand. It burned cold.
But then he turned from the table and went back to the bed.
Now, never once in my life have I snooped. I’ve never pried, intruded, or watched anyone when they didn’t think they could be perceived. But I couldn’t leave his room. I froze in my place as I watched when he pulled his pants off. I couldn’t focus on anything else except his body. The way he moved, settled in the room, got in the bed, and plugged his phone in; every decision and every thought process was so painfully human.
I liked him a lot. Too much.
I wanted him to know I was here too. 
The last time I tried to communicate with humans was with my best friends after the accident happened. After, their realtor was a bitch. There was a medium who was more so a dumbass who came to communicate with me. I scared her, and perhaps that went wrong. That might have been why it took so long for this place to be renovated. 
I needed to talk to Colby. I wanted him.
I never wanted anyone as badly as I wanted him.
I stood in front of the desk where the devices were strewn about, and as he read his phone, I touched one of the devices. 
I recognized one. It was a radio of sorts. One of the mediums who tried to communicate with me used it. Perhaps they were here to try to talk to me anyway.
I turned the spirit box on.
Immediately, Colby sat straight up in his bed. His phone was forgotten on the sheets. I laughed and watched as his confused eyes scanned the room.
”Hello,” I laughed. Then I used energy and found the word on a channel—
Hello
Colby looked around the room.
”Um, hi?” He said.
If I had a body, I was pretty sure the feeling I had was akin to my heart falling out of my ass.
“I know who you are, you publish on YouTube, right?”
I know you
Colby’s face turned with distrust. 
“What—Are there actually spirits in this house?” He asked. I rolled my eyes.
”Obviously. You’re so dumb. I thought you know how to talk to us—
Duh…
He scoffed and his shock turned into an amused expression.
”What’s your na—“
Don’t be stupid
He stopped talking and his eyes widened.
”How do you know me? I’ve never been here.”
”You literally have 11 million people watching you on YouTube, don’t be silly,” I sighed.
You make videos
”You’re seen my—“ He gasped and thought for a moment. “How old are you? How long have you been here?”
For a long time
”I’m supposed to be nineteen,” I sighed.
Nineteen
”Nineteen—Holy shit wait, someone—the owners said a nineteen year old died here in the 70s—“
”That was totally me.”
Me
Colby looked at the spirit box on the table and I smiled.
“Yeah,” he gasped nervously. “Are you the only spirit in the house?”
”Only one that lives here, anyway,” I scoffed.
Only one
”I’m sorry you’re alone.” I froze. 
“What did you say?” I asked quietly, timidly. Silence. It defeated me. 
It had been over 50 years since the accident and in all that time, no one apologized.
No one said sorry about my death or that I was alone. Not a single person had the empathy. Colby stared back at the spirit box. His eyes fell from it. He looked around the room in thought.
Suddenly, the urge ever too heavy came over me. 
I glided straight over to him and I sat on the bed.
He shot up with his eyes wide. 
If I had eyes, he would have looked right into them.
”Are-Are you on the bed with me?”
”Yes,” I confidently said and tried to use all my energy to tell the spirit box—
Yes… On this bed…
”Holy shit,” Colby whispered. 
I felt the way his heart skipped.
The way his skin lit on fire.
I moved forward, and when I did, his skin fell cold.
”Did-Did you just touch me?” 
“I’m on top of you.”
And it was true. I straddled him. I held his face in my lack of hands, and the warmth coursed through me like an electrical current. I needed him. He tethered me back into reality; the human world. That urge and that desperation to move onto the spirit realm died the moment I touched him.
Top
”You’re on me?” He rested his weight on his hands behind him. When he pushed his hips forward, a gasp left me because I felt the pressure. 
Familiarity.
“I remember you, Colby. I know you, we knew each other—‘
Colby
”Why did you say my—“
I know you
“You know—oh shit,” he gasped. My vision hazed. My perception of my surroundings grew blurry as if I was about to sleep.
Heat coursed my body, and I held onto him to keep from falling asleep.
”You feel really good,” I gasped. I didn’t think about this.
We knew each other
“What?” He gasped as his body went rigid. Sexual things were so far from me. I figured that when I moved onto the spirit realm, more doors to explore sexuality would open. I never came across another human I viewed as desirable like him. 
I never came across a human or spirit that felt as familiar as he was.
I knew he already had two female ghosts who liked him and messed around with him.
Good
”What’s good?” He gasped again. This time, it sounded like he was more breathless than anything.
”You.”
You
”Is that you making me feel like this? Are you touching me?” I moaned when I thrusted against him over and over. “Holy fuck—I just got so… What am I even doing?” Colby sighed more so to himself and then he laid himself back down against the bed. I gasped when he moved through me. 
I looked down at him as his forearm rested across his forehead. His face was flushed and eyes were closed in thought.
I couldn’t deny the pressure under me. I knew he was painfully hard under me, but I had no intention of leaving or letting him do it himself. I looked down and couldn’t look away from his body. It was on fire, and the pressure in his underwear grew and grew.
I wish I could feel him for real with my hands and my skin. 
“Holy fuck,” he moaned this time, and I moaned as well. He sounded so good like this. “I feel so crazy. Please tell me this is you doing this to me and not me—“
”I’m doing it. I’m touching you, Colby. Let me touch you.” Colby moaned again and again as I thrusted against him. 
It’s me
His eyes shot open again.
Let me touch you
“Fuck, okay—holy shit—okay you’re-you’re actually real.”
”Yes,” I laughed. “I want to see you feel good.” 
“If you’re actually real, get off of me and make me stop feeling like this—“
I was on the other side of the room in an instant. Colby sat up with a flushed face. 
“What the fuck,” he whispered. I felt as the arousal in his body diminished. “And…” He mumbled hesitantly. “And if you’re real, get on top of me. Turn me on again.”
I blinked and I straddled Colby’s lap. 
“Holy fucking—ugh.” And his head tossed into the pillow and eyes rolled back.
”Fuck,” I gasped as I watched him throw his arm across his mouth to conceal his moans.
Immediately, his arousal built again, and I thrusted against him over and over.
”You’re making me—Oh my god, don’t stop please,” Colby gasped. 
You feel good
”Fuck,” he gasped.
He looked up at me and I swore he saw me. He didn't look through me, and I wished I could touch him.
Kiss him.
”You’re going to make me come.”
“Oh my god yeah, I want to see you come,” I mumbled. I would resurrect myself from the dead just to kill myself again if he knew I said that so I tried to hold in the energy. I didn’t want the music box to pick up on anything.
I tried to pull his underwear down. It was too difficult, too heavy. I was too tired. My gaze flashed around the room.
His phone. 
I focused my energy on his phone and took the energy from it. The strength boiled and boiled in my being until I opened my eyes and watched as the waistband of it ever so slightly pulled back.
”Oh my fucking god—“ Colby gasped, and I cried out in surprise when he sat up straight and kicked himself away from me. “You-You fucking pulled—Are you trying to take my underwear off? Oh my god—You’re fucking real. You really are—“
“Colby it’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you I want to make you feel good—“
Don’t be scared
”What?” He gasped and whirled his gaze to the spirit box.
Make you feel good
“I’m—“ he paused. He looked around the room. “I’m not scared. I can’t believe you’re communicating so well with me.”
”I’m taking power from your phone,” I said towards the spirit box.
This cell phone
Colby looked back to the spirit box.
”My phone?”
Using energy
”Oh, you’re taking the energy from my phone? Let me plug it in so you can take as much as you want—“
Yes
”Okay—“ He groaned as he leaned over and plugged it in. He left it on the table next to the bed. I didn’t give him another second to say a sentence. I pushed down against him and he drew in an uneven breath. “I can’t believe I can feel you.”
”Can you feel this?” I grinded down on him, and his arm caught another moan behind his mouth.
“Holy shit—I think I felt-I felt that. I’m so—oh my god!” I pulled at his underwear again, and this time, I pulled it halfway down. “I’m so…” He sighed into a moan, and I felt the way heat traveled down his body. His temperature rose, and I couldn’t look away. Not a second passed that I didn’t utterly consume the image of his real life human body under me.
I pushed again and again, and before his hand could reach into his underwear, he gasped a rather louder moan and spilled in the fabric. 
I quickly tried to pull it back again, and this time, his underwear pulled halfway off. 
“Oh my god—“ I gasped as I watched the rest of his fluids cover his stomach.
”You just fucking—You actually took them off,” he gasped breathlessly as he gathered himself together after his orgasm.
Pleasure washed through me as well, but it wasn’t as tangible as it used to be when I was alive. I was on fire, and I wanted more, anything more, but it was impossible here.
Then the tug.
I wanted to move on.
It was as if this window of pleasure piqued my interest, and I knew that if I moved onto the spiritual realm, I could live again. I wouldn’t be trapped in this purgatory.
Colby was so cute though. He was familiar; he looked like he was mine. We were each other’s. I wanted him to myself, but there was no way I could take him with me. He needed to finish living as a human first.
Then maybe I would hunt him down and rescue him from his purgatory so he wouldn’t have to live like this for 50 years like me.
“Did you leave?” Colby whispered.
”No. I’m right here.”
Here
“Okay,” he sighed and relaxed into the pillow. “I can’t believe I just had sex with a ghost—wait,” he gasped and looked around the room. “Did I fuck you? That’s so—What the fuck…”
“No, I just touched you. I wanted you to feel good. I can’t feel good until I move on.”
No… For you… I don’t feel good
”What?” Colby gasped. “You don’t feel good?”
”I can’t.”
Can’t
”Oh, because… Is sex only for human bodies then?”
”No,” I said, and reminded myself to be concise for the spirit box
No
”When I escape I can feel something again.”
When I escape
”You’re trapped here?” Colby gasped. The gears turned in his head and excitement welled in me.
”Help me out, please.”
Help me
”Help you do what? Do you need to move on?”
”Yes! Help me to the spiritual world.”
Yes
”Where do you need me to—”
Spirit world
”Holy shit,” Colby whispered. “You want me to help move you out of purgatory? Is that what this house is for you?’
”Yes!” I exclaimed. 
He understood!
Yes
”Well then I’m getting up and telling Sam.”
If I had a body, I would scream and cry for joy.
Also, if I had a body, it would burn alive at the sight of Colby cleaning himself up, so I left the room and waited in the hallway with welling excitement. 
“You’ll actually use the spirit box and not make me look like a freak in front of him, right?”
”Yeah, I’ll talk to him,” I laughed.
Yes
”Good,” he scoffed as he pulled on clothes. 
“I promise.”
”Dude, that’s crazy if it’s true.” I watched as Colby told Sam what had happened and conveniently left out the part where I touched him. If he didn’t want Sam to know, then I wouldn’t expose him in that way. “Let’s see if she actually communicates as accurately as that,” Sam said as he turned on the spirit box. “Would we need to try the Estes?”
”Maybe we can,” Colby sighed. “There was a vortex downstairs, did you see it?”
”No I didn’t actually,” he gasped. “Do you want to do Estes there?”
“I’m getting bored,” I grumbled.
Let’s hurry it up
”Whoa!” Sam cried when the box spat those words out at him.
”Yeah,” Colby laughed. “She isn’t very patient.”
“Are you trapped here like Colby sai—“
”Yes!”
Yes
”Oh my god.”
”I told you!” I watched the boys as they grabbed their things. “Let's do it now.”
And as they walked through me towards the staircase, I froze with realization upon feeling Colby's body. It ached with excitement, nervousness, and…
Longing?
I followed them and listened to his heart and the rushing of his blood. Something tuned to desperation flowed with it. 
It would have been much easier for me to navigate life as a human if I could feel someone’s physical attraction to me like I could feel Colby’s. I didn’t think that was possible, especially since he couldn’t see me. For all I knew, they could still be on the fence about believing that I existed.
But I couldn’t deny the way he felt. The way Sam felt. Sam didn’t hear me or feel me the way Colby did, but I could tell by the warmth of his palms and the racing of his heart that he didn’t linger in denial anymore. 
“I’m not even sure how to start this,” Sam said as he sat in the chair. He volunteered himself to be under the Estes method so that Colby could lead the interaction. I stood next to Sam in the middle of the vortex; the darkened mirrors holding endless hypnotizing space hung on either side of us. 
“I know, it’s fine. I’ll figure it out when we get there. I’m pretty sure I just encourage her to move on and she uses energy or something. We’ll see.”
Sam pulled the blindfold down. Headphones placed over his ears. 
I felt the energy from the spirit box shrill to life.
“Did you follow us down here?”
“Yes,” I said quickly. “I’m here.”
“Here,” Sam’s monotone voice spoke for me.
“Okay good.” Colby’s voice softened. I wanted to leave, I wanted it more than anything, but I also wished I had more time to listen to Colby, to be close to him. Every time I was near him, I zapped with electricity; a desperation I never knew. What would it be like if I was human? If we knew each other back then? What would it be like if we were born at the same time in the same state?
“Why are you afraid to move on?”
“I—All this time I wasn’t afraid, I just didn’t want to leave the human world, but now I can’t leave you. I want to stay with you, Colby.”
“Oh wow…” Sam muttered. 
“What?” Colby said quickly.
“That was a long—Those were a lot of words,” he laughed sheepishly. “Um…” I repeated what I said but paraphrased it to make it easier for the box to pick me up. “I wasn’t afraid of it.”
“You aren’t?” Colby gasped. “Why haven’t you—”
“Missed people.”
“Oh, I see.”
“Let me stay with you.”
“What?” Colby paused this time. “So you didn’t move on because you missed people and now you want to stay with us? Is it because you haven’t talked to anyone except for us—”
“No,” I grumbled. “I want you, Colby. No one else.”
“You, Colby.”
“Me?” He whispered. “Why do you want to stay with me? You can’t do that. You need to move on–”
“I wish we had time together then you would understand.” I wished that I could cry like humans did at that moment. I cried, but no pressure relieved me.
“We could have had more time.” Colby’s body froze as he stared in shock at Sam. Or maybe he stared through him. He wanted something to look at; he couldn’t see me. I wished I could reveal myself to him, but I didn’t know how.
“Why do you want us to have more time?”
“Because we would have been together. I could have actually probably loved you.”
“I would have…. I didn’t catch— Love you.”
“I would have loved you…” Colby whispered. “It’s too late,” he told me, but the quietness of his voice sounded like he figured it out for himself. 
“I can see you again, Colby.”
“See you again… Colby, dude it keeps saying your name.”
“I know,” Colby spoke absentmindedly. He looked like he was in a trance more than Sam was even though he rocked back and forth in the Estes method. “Are—Do you know me?”
“Maybe in a past life. We can find each other in the next.”
“Past life.”
“Holy shit.” His voice was quiet and I wanted nothing more than to hug him. I stood face to face with him in the blink of an eye. 
“I will see you soon, Colby.”
And I kissed him.
He blinked quickly and warm surprise flooded me when he licked his lips once.
“See you soon.” He didn't know what to say. I felt the tension in his throat.
“Don’t cry. Now tell me to leave and then you can find me when you’re done living here.”
“Help me leave.” Colby shook his head.
“No–”
“Please help me, Colby. I need to go on. You can’t stay here forever. I’ll be able to see you still and you’ll be able to feel me until one day you’ll see me for the first time. Well, for the first time in this timeline. Isn’t that exciting?”
“Please help me… You will still… I didn’t hear—Oh, You’ll still feel me.”
“I—I don’t like—”
“It’s okay, don’t be scared.” I stood in the vortex again. “Help me leave. I’ll see you later.”
“Don’t be scared. Help me leave.” 
“Okay,” Colby said as he shook himself out of it. “It’s alright, you can move on. Spirits leave this house, move on to the next life.”
That tug returned, but now it was unavoidable. The mirrors lulled me into a beckoning trance.
“Move on and be free from this house.”
The mirror pulled me in, the house was unreachable now.
“Love you.”
As Sam pulled off the blindfold, Colby’s eyes darted towards mine from where I traveled through the mirror, and from the look on his face—the pure focus on me, drift of his tear filled eyes across my face—he saw me.
Then all I saw was light.
Tumblr media
A/N: I took a much needed break. Not to info or trauma dump, but my mom moved about four hours away from me a week ago, and I only found out three weeks before that. After helping her move, it's been pretty hard for me since we've only ever lived at most 10 minutes from each other. Thanks for being patient, and I'm going to hop back on that writing grind because I miss it!
Also, Comment if you would rather read multi-chapter fics on Tumblr or Ao3. This will help me navigate where to post if I do not cross post.
✧˖*°࿐
Taglist (Comment to be added):
@a-random-google-user
@graceciesiels22
@honestlybabymiracle
@xxsecretscenekidxx
@thedeadlynights
@glittervame
@rockwyu
@worldlxvlys
@benbarnesprettygurl
283 notes · View notes
steddieas-shegoes · 1 year
Text
“Hey, Wayne said you refused to talk to the therapist.”
It was day 34 of visiting Eddie in the hospital, and there was finally a light at the end of the tunnel. If Eddie would talk to the therapist, he could be released into Wayne’s care.
The therapist spent two hours with him, and apparently got nothing more than some sighs and eye rolls.
“I didn’t like him.”
“Well, we can get you another one.”
“I don’t like them either.”
Steve rolled his eyes.
“You haven’t even met them yet.”
“I just know I won’t,” Eddie said as he crossed his arms, hissing when he rubbed against the bandages still covering most of his torso.
“Do you want to stay in the hospital forever?”
“No.”
“Then why can’t you just talk to the therapist? You don’t have to tell them everything, just how you’re feeling now.”
“I don’t want to.”
Steve was trying not to get frustrated. He promised Wayne he’d try to talk some sense into him patiently. It was proving to be harder than he thought it would be.
“What is it that you don’t want to tell them?”
“That maybe I did kill Chrissy! That maybe if she had just gone home or I told her no that she’d still be alive! Maybe Vecna would have gone to the next victim and I wouldn’t have to be here in pain!” Eddie was breathing heavily, his heart monitor beeping more rapidly the more he spoke.
Steve didn’t visibly react, though he wanted to. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold Eddie, turn back time and pretend that it was possible that Chrissy wouldn’t have died, let Eddie live his life not knowing these horrors existed.
He wanted to be able to scrub the memory of carrying Eddie’s limp and bloody body from his mind so he could go back to his regular nightmares of him dying, not the man he-
“Sorry.”
Steve’s thoughts came to an abrupt halt when Eddie spoke his apology so softly into the room. It was a direct contrast to how he’d been before, and it was startling.
A thought occurred to Steve, one he hadn’t thought of in at least two years, but felt right now.
“You know, I used to be kind of friends with Chrissy. Not close, but we talked.”
Eddie stared at him curiously, probably wondering where this could be going.
“It was funny. It didn’t happen until I wasn’t popular anymore. I guess that just shows she was a great person.”
“Yeah. She was.”
“I remember I was sitting alone eating lunch. Jason and his crew weren’t there and she walked up to me and said ‘let’s be lonely together for today.’ And I guess that was our thing, being lonely together. It sounds stupid.”
“Doesn’t sound stupid to me.”
Steve looked up and saw Eddie’s wide, wet eyes staring back at him, silently begging him to continue his story. Maybe he needed this.
“It happened a few more times and then we ended up hanging out a few times before graduation. We actually,” Steve paused and bit his lip. This would give a lot away and may end up making things worse for Eddie, but he wanted to believe it would help. “We bonded over our crush on you.”
He let it sit in the air for a moment, eyes refusing to look back up at Eddie.
Until he felt a hand on his.
“You both had a crush on me? Me?!”
“Don’t tell Robin, but she was the first person I came out to. Accidentally. And it wasn’t really coming out so much as admitting I thought you were cute.”
“You thought I was cute?!”
“Well, yeah! Always playing with your hair and doodling during class. Helping the freshman find their classes. Giving those speeches. You were brave.”
“Steve. That’s not bravery.”
“It is when everyone is willing to hurt you because of who you are.”
“I barely ever actually got beat up. Words are just words.”
“We both know that isn’t true.”
Eddie nodded, swallowed, then sighed.
“Yeah. I just didn’t want anyone to feel like me.”
“That’s why we had a crush on you!”
“Well, that’s nice that you bonded over that.”
Steve didn’t like the sudden change in his tone. Like he’d liked hearing the story, but now he realized it didn’t matter.
And maybe it didn’t.
Chrissy was still gone. Eddie still had to watch her die a terrible death.
They were both still traumatized.
But Steve still had a crush on Eddie that wouldn’t go away no matter how much he repressed it.
And maybe that part of the story was something that could change for the better.
“Robin told me I’m an idiot.”
“Yeah, she tells all of us that often.”
“But this is about something specific.”
“What is it?”
“Well, I never got over my crush on you. And instead of saying something about it, I just thought I’d forget about it eventually.”
Eddie blinked at him.
“Chrissy once dared me to ask you out. She said when you graduate, I should do it. Just take the risk.
She was pretty sure you were into both anyways.”
“She was right.”
“Yeah, she usually was,” Steve nodded. “But the problem here is you haven’t technically graduated yet.”
“No I haven’t.”
“You could, though.”
“Maybe.”
“But you have to get out of here first.”
“I see what you’re doing, Harrington.”
“What’s that?” Steve smirked and reached out to move Eddie’s hair away from his face.
“Bribing me to graduate with promises of a date.”
“Is it working?”
Eddie sighed. “Unfortunately.”
“Good. So you’ll talk to the therapist tomorrow?”
“I don’t have a choice, do I?”
“You always have a choice, I’m just hoping you choose you.” ——————————— When Eddie walked across the stage two months later to get his diploma, Steve was giving him a standing ovation.
He ignored his original plan of flipping off Principal Higgins, he didn’t want more eyes on him than he already had.
He ignored it because now he had a new plan. He was gonna walk off the stage, throw his cap in the air, and then kiss Steve Harrington.
Part 2: Prologue
2K notes · View notes
suki-daydreams · 7 months
Text
You're Glowing
Tumblr media
IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED S2 THE HIDDEN INVENTORY ARC OF JUJUTSU KAISEN LEAVE RIGHT NOW !!
summary : a year after the failed mission with involving riko amanai, yu haibara died on a mission, and geto left gojo to pursue his dream of killing all non sorcerers. you along with gojo, nanami, utahime, and shoko try your best to cope with everything that's going on. gojo wants comfort, but he also wants to be alone. so, he should go be lonely with you.
tw : mentions of geto losing weight, mentions of the world 'kill', a gun is used in this
info : past arc gojo x reader, reader is a sorcerer, angst, comfort, fluff, gojo satoru x reader, teen gojo x reader, lonely gojo, reader ily, reader same age as gojo, soft gojo, cuddling, reader is also best friends with gojo, suguru, and shoko. reader is an ex assassin. angst to fluff
this is not a geto x reader! or gojo x reader x geto they are best friends - this is only a gojo x reader thank u <3
suki's notes : inspired by the song This Side of Paradise by Coyote Theory (づ。◕‿‿◕。)づ ... i've been writing SO MUCH baker reader x gojo. needed to twist it up
this is really fucking loooong because of the buildup my bad y'all
enjoy ~
___
You are the only person Gojo would allow himself to become vulnerable with.
___
Nanami passed out exhausted on a hospital bed. Overwhelmed Shoko sitting on a chair. Utahime resting her head on a desk. Yaga rummaging through papers to file. And Gojo... is no where to be seen.
You are a 3rd year.
You had been trained to be an assassin since you were 6. Your whole life you had been killing people for those who are too weak or too much of a coward to do it, and you'd get paid A LOT.
But, you became a jujutsu sorcerer because you didn't want to be a murderer anymore. So, you started fresh as a first year at jujutsu high when you turned 15 to come to clean living and so you could protect non sorcerers. Hoping it would be enough for all the lives you've took.
You had thought, oh I got trained at a young age. I'm probably more experienced, I got this. Your first year went great, you made friends and many memories. Everything was going great! Until your second year and third year came around.
You were quick on your feet and silent too. There are very few people who are faster than you. You had heard of Toji, known as the sorcerer killer and many other names, he was one of the best assassins. And, he was one of the rare people who could sneak past you.
When Riko got assassinated, you were there with Geto.
Gojo told you to leave with Amanai immediately while he handled Toji. You trusted Satoru, but he was sleep deprived, exhausted from keeping his technique on for days and nights.
"He has a heavenly restriction!" You yelled to Satoru before leaving with Geto and Amanai. You escorted her until you and Geto were forbidden to walk any further. When she finally realized she wanted to live for herself. She was shot in the head. You registered what happened in less than a second.
You turned around to take action and leaped towards Toji, but he was fast. Too fast. The assassin had already come up behind you and hit you straight in the nape. Knocking you unconscious.
And when you woke up, everything was already over. You weren't quick enough. If you didn't let your guard down. Amanai would still be alive.
When Yu died, you were one of the firsts to find out- besides Shoko of course.
But, when Geto massacred the village, you were the first to find out.
It crushed you.
Because you were the first and only person Geto talked to about his change in morals.
~
"Y/n.." his voice was soft. You and him were grabbing a snack in the cafeteria after somehow managing to run into each other at the dorms past midnight.
"Yea?" You replied, grabbing a bag of chips.
"What do you think about.. non sorcerers?" He asked, you hummed.
"Well.." you said, "I don't know.. it's complicated."
"How so?"
"First of all, I don't blame them for not having cursed energy, that's just simply how you're born. It's genetics, passed down from generations. It's out of their control. But, when I was an assassin I just saw them as weak, they paid me to do the things they can't or because they're too much of a coward to do it, sounds pretty worthless- know what I mean?" you said, "but, sometimes as a sorcerer, I feel under appreciated? I don't know how to say it.."
You looked at him, "we save the world, we save non sorcerers, and they don't even know. They live everyday like usual while we place our lives on the line to defeat a curse.. to make sure a curse doesn't kill another innocent person. At least when I was an assassin, I was paid as a reward, but non sorcerers-"
"Curses comes from them." He said, you tilted your head.
"What?"
"Curses come from negative emotions, emotions from non sorcerers-"
"I would say they come from all humans, including sorcerers, not just non sorcerers, Suguru," you replied, he looked away mumbling a quiet 'whatever'. You reached up and put a hand on his shoulder making him flinch at your touch.
"Suguru, why are you asking me this?" You asked, he sighed and crouched down making you step back from his sudden change in position.
"I think.. I'm starting to hate them.. y/n," he whispered.
"What?"
"I said I think-"
"I heard you!!" You whispered yelled, "Suguru, you were the one who said that non sorcerers need protection, and we, the sorcerers, are here to protect them!"
"I know, I know..." he said, "but, that's changed."
You crouched down and looked at his features. He lost weight, he hasn't been eating, and hasn't been sleeping either. You were worried, something was bothering him. Something changed him. So, when he said that he hates non sorcerers, you knew that was the thing that was eating him up.
"After Riko's death and now Yu's... seeing how they died for non sorcerers because they're weak and can't do anything for themselves-"
"Suguru, they can't see curses, they don't have cursed energy, they can't do anything-"
"Listen to me y/n," he said putting a hand on your shoulder, "if non sorcerers didn't exist. There would be less curses."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm trying to say.." then he stopped. What he wanted to say was, "I'm trying to say that I want to kill all non sorcerers."
But he couldn't bring himself to say it, not with you.
He cleared his throat, "I'm trying to say that, I still haven't recovered from their deaths. Riko and Yu dying for non sorcerers- and they don't even know. This enrages me. They don't know the sacrifices we make just to make sure they live another day."
"Oh, Suguru.." you said and hugged him making his eye's widened at your sudden action, "I'm sorry. Losing people is hard, but it makes you stronger, it makes you more of a fighter!" You said, pulling away with a big grin.
"You never let me finish my answer, so I'll just say it right now," you said, he nodded, "though, I do feel underappreciated.. at times... What keeps me going is seeing kids smile while playing with their friends at a playground. Families gathering around dinner tables to be together. Friends laughing with each other at the mall!" You said, then your eyes softened at him.
"Seeing them happy, seeing them smile is the reward, knowing that they live another day because I have strong friends who protect them, I am there to protect them as well. And in return, I get to live to see another day with my friends. The people I cherish the most," you said.
He stayed silent, his eye's stared into yours, you saw nothing. No change in expression, no change in his eyes, no change... in his heart..
"You know, I was planning on quitting this year," you said.
"Really?" He asked, you nodded.
"I was planning on quitting being a jujutsu sorcerer. I couldn't take it anymore. I was going to go to a normal school, get a normal job, live a normal life, but Satoru killing all the curses by himself? I couldn't bring myself to leave," you said, "he would be more busy and overwhelmed."
"That's why?"
"Yes! But, I also look forward to seeing everyone again after a mission. You and Gojo, keep me going, even when you guys aren't with me... know what I mean?" You asked, he nodded. "Plus, I swore to become a sorcerer because I've taken so many lives, and I feel like protecting innocent is the only way I can make up for it. Y'know?" You asked.
"You must really like Gojo if you stayed to be a sorcerer so he didn't bear the burden by himself."
You blushed, "... not just Gojo.. You, and Nanami, and Utahime."
He chuckled, "yeah, sure." He smiled but you didn't miss how it dropped quickly.
"Are you.. okay?" You asked, he cleared his throat then stood up making you follow his movements.
"Yes, thank you.. Y/n. For keeping me company," he said, "you promise not to tell anyone what I told you?" You smiled.
"I promise! If you need to talk to anyone, I'm always here for you. I always will be," you said cheerfully. He gave you a small smile before waving goodbye. You both parted in the opposite directions to return to your room.
___
A couple days later, while you were just about to enter the gates of jujutsu high after returning from a mission, Yaga called you in an immediate hurry.
"Hello?-"
"Y/n- you need to see me as quick as possible... it's.... it's about Suguru," he said, you ran. You ran past the gates, past the forest, the hallways, to get to Yaga's office. You were scared.. did Suguru.. die? What happened? What did he do? Where is he?
You burst into his office to see Yaga pinching the bridge of his nose. He said nothing, but dropped down a file on his desk. You walked over and picked it up.
Your jaw dropped, your heart sank as tears brimmed your eyes.
"S-...Suguru.. did... this?"
"Yes."
Geto Suguru's residuals were traced all over a massacred village of 112 people. 112 people, including his parents. From this, we can conclude that Geto Suguru is the one that annihilated the village. Geto Suguru is expelled from Jujutsu High. He is to be killed on site or captured and executed at Jujutsu High.
"No, no, no, no, no," you said, your hands trembled and you dropped the file. Your hands immediately went to your hair and you yanked on the strands, "this isn't real. This.. isn't Suguru-"
"I'm afraid it is," Yaga said then sighed, "I don't know why he did this either."
Then it all hit you.
You knew.
You knew, but you were too dumb to see.
He told you.
You didn't see.
You didn't know.. at least.. then you didn't know.
"It's all my fault," you whispered. Yaga placed a hand on your shoulder.
"You-"
"Did you tell.. Satoru?" You asked cutting him off. He sighed and looked away. "Did you tell, Satoru?" You repeated firmly.
"No. Not yet. You're the first one who knows about this."
"Suguru.. why? Why?" You repeated and crouched down. The lump in your throat burned as you tried to blink your tears away.
No no no no no no no. This isn't happening. This isn't real. Wake up.
"I will tell him when he returns from his mission," Yaga said, "go get cleaned up. Go rest. Again, you're the first person I've told about this."
You didn't say anything. You just walked out.
This... is all my fault.
___
And, that's how you got here. Nanami passed out on a hospital bed in the corner of the room with a hot rag on his forehead. Shoko dozing off on a chair. Utahime sleeping at a desk. Yaga sitting at a table with stacks of papers while typing away on his laptop. You were on a sofa, staring at the ground.
Yaga informed you that he told Satoru about what Geto did. He also told you that Shoko had run into Geto in the city and she called Gojo. Gojo rushed to the city as quickly as possible to confront Geto. With that Geto bid goodbye. Gojo was supposed to kill Geto. But he couldn't.
He summoned all of you to the room you're in right now, you were just waiting for Gojo.
You couldn't bare to see Satoru. After all, you could've saved Suguru. You could've saved Satoru's best friend. You could've avoided all of this, if you never left Geto's side, to make sure he didn't feel alone, to make sure his ideals stayed the same.
You tried thinking of something else, so that your tears would just go away, but they wouldn't.
You killed the best friend of the man you loved.
The door slid opened and you stared at your feet. It was Satoru. You felt his gaze on you, but you didn't bother to look at him. You couldn't.
Yaga cleared his throat and stood up, waking Nanami, Utahime, and Shoko up from their slumber, "you all.. are aware what happened to Suguru and what he has done."
Everyone nodded.
"What do you guys think of this?" Yaga asked.
"Well, I think it was dumb how he wanted to become a cursed user," Shoko spoke up, you applauded her in your mind for being the first to talk.
"I don't know.. how I feel about this," Utahime said.
"If anyone has something bothering them talk to each other," Yaga said, your heart sank. "You only have each other, that's all you really need," he said, you tried to swallow the lump in your throat.
You hated crying in front of people. You hated being vulnerable. You were trained to bury it deep down or hide it from others.
"I don't know why Geto did this.. I don't know why he changed. But, if anyone of you have something that's bothering you, speak up right now."
"Why are you asking us this?" Nanami asked.
Yaga clenched his fist, "I don't want to lose anymore students. I don't want any of you to turn out like Suguru." He said, "so, if there's anything, tell me, or tell someone else, I don't care. Just don't.."
He sighed, slumping back in his chair.
Everyone's souls were crushed.
"I'll let you know when we have classes. Dismissed," Yaga said, everyone got up.
You pushed yourself off the couch, but your knees felt weak.
This is all my fault..
Then suddenly, all the tears you had been holding back... all the frustration you hid...
..had poured out.
You immediately fell to your knees. Everyone gasped as you collapsed. You were quick enough to catch yourself by planting your hands onto the floor.
Gojo's eyes widened.
"Y/n!!" Utahime yelled rushing over to you. You cried and wailed while clenching your fist.
"It's my fault!" You yelled.
Everyone stopped, then you sat up with tears running down your cheeks- eyes glued to the ground.
"Suguru... talked to me.. about hating non sorcerers," you whispered, as they stayed silent, "he asked me what I think of non sorcerers, I told him that sometimes I feel underappreciated, but seeing them smile with their loved one's is what keeps me going."
Utahime came to your side with a hand on your back, Shoko knelt down and pressed a hand to your forehead.
"You're burning up-"
"He then told me that... if there wasn't any non sorcerers.. there would be less curses. He told me that Riko's and Yu's death changed him," you spoke, "he said that, they died protecting the weak and it enraged him because non sorcerers don't know the sacrifices us sorcerers have to make."
"I... knew," you whispered, "he covered it up by saying that he just hasn't recovered from Amanai's and Yu's death and that's why his view on non sorcerers changed. But, I was too dumb to see that, I was so dumb and believed the lie... when he revealed his true self to me," you said, then looked up at Gojo.
"'Toru... I'm so sorry.. I could've saved your best friend, but I'm so stupid. I-" you covered your face in your hands and cried. Gojo kneeled down and pulled you into his chest.
"You are not responsible for his actions, Y/n," he whispered you sniffled into his chest.
"I could've done something. I could've changed his mind. I could've saved him, 'Toru-"
"Look at me," he said pulling away from you. He wiped your tears as you sniffled. "You couldn't have changed him, you couldn't have done anything, he chose how to live his life- people like that, you cannot change." He said then leaned forward.
"Why.. didn't you tell me?" He asked.
You wiped your nose, "he promised me not to tell anyone.."
Gojo smiled, it was a sad smile, but he tried to make it look as happy as possible, "you always keep your promises, come here," he said then embraced you once again.
Your phone began to vibrate making you pull away, you slipped it out of your pocket and your eye's widened, "it's... Geto.."
Everyone gasped and you answered it, "Suguru?"
"Hey Y/n," he said in a cheery voice, "I wanted to say goodbye to you before leaving, wanna meet up?"
You looked over at Yaga and he nodded, "uh- sure.."
"Great! I'll text you the details," he said, then he hung up. Your phone chimed with a message from Geto, he had sent you the location and time.
"What does it say?" Utahime said
"It's a park," you said, the held your phone up for everyone to see.
Bestie Suguru Blue Rose Park. At the bench by the lake at 4 pm. Don't be late
Yaga summoned you after you had gotten ready. You decided not to wear your jujutsu uniform but some oversized sweatpants and one of Satoru's hoodies with sneakers.
"Y/n, we are going with you," he said, you blinked at Gojo standing behind him.
"Uh-"
"We won't intervene, I'm just going to record your conversation. This machine only works within a certain radius. I'll just put a mic on you, it's strong enough to pick up Geto's voice, try not to talk too loud," he said, you relaxed.
"Stay hidden then," you said, he nodded.
"And... Y/n.." he said, you tilted your head, "you... are going to have to kill him," he said.
Your eyes widened as you stepped back.
Gojo jumped, "whoa, whoa, whoa," Gojo said standing in front of you, shielding you from Yaga's view. Yaga pinched the bridge of his nose again.
"Unfortunately, I have to report everything involving Geto to the higher ups, they demanded that Y/n kills him." Yaga said then sighed and held out a gun. You stared at it. "Y/n is the most capable of killing him."
"I..."
"Just take it, for protection.."
"You think he's gonna hurt me?" You asked, Yaga sighed.
"You never know."
You took it from his grasp and tucked it into your waistband making Gojo look at you.
When you were an assassin- you were one of the best at handling a gun. You had shot many people. In their heads, their hands, arms, legs, shoulder, torso, you name it. But shooting your best friend? Are you capable of doing that?
You tucked the mini microphone on your shirt underneath your Gojo's hoodie. Both you and Gojo sat in the backseat of Yaga's car as he drove you to a building by the park.
"Gojo and I are going to be in this building on the 4th floor near the window, but you won't be able to see us. If anything happens, we will run out," Yaga said, you nodded.
Yaga gave you a gun, Yaga came with you by the higher ups command. But, also because he didn't want to lose another student as he said. He hid his feelings in his actions.
You fiddled with you fingers and Gojo rested a hand on your head, "you sure you're going to be okay?" He asked, you nodded. And, he pulled you into his chest once more before letting you go.
You gazed around the park and finally saw Suguru sitting on a bench. He didn't bother to turn around and greet you, you joined his side and sighed.
"So.. cursed user now?"
"Yep... I found how I wanted to live my life, that's all," he said.
"You killed... a lot of people.. Suguru."
"They were holding these two little girls captive. I had to do something, Y/n," he said, "wouldn't you have done the same thing?"
"I would've freed the two little girls without killing the whole village," you simply stated. He laughed.
"You wouldn't kill the whole village? I find it hard to believe that."
"How so?" You asked.
You knew why. Assassins don't wait, they take. Even if it means killing people who you weren't even assigned to kill. You had become a sorcerer but you haven't abandoned some of your assassin ways. You choose to act first with violence because that's simply how you were trained.
Shoot first, ask questions later. But, some people won't be able to answer because they'd be dead.
Geto did nothing but smile.
"I take it you brought guests with you?"
You gave him a small smile, "yes, but they won't intervene unless you try to hurt me or something."
"I would never."
"You also never said I couldn't bring anyone, so that's your fault," you said sticking out your tongue, you found it strange how you were able to joke with a murderer who was once your best friend right now.
He laughed, then you both stared at the lake.
It was glimmering in the suns golden light as kids by the park near you and him laughed while chasing each other around.
"I know you probably think you could've changed me or saved me, Y/n," he said, "but trust me, the Geto you knew died when Riko did."
You looked at him then looked back at the water, "it's weird.."
"What is?"
"I've known you for years, you're my best friend. Your presence feels so familiar to me, yet I feel like I don't know you at all," you said then looked up at him.
"I'm your best friend, huh?" He smiled, "I thought that would've changed already."
"It hasn't."
He sighed, "you know when you told me you were planning on quitting being a jujutsu sorcerer?" Your eye's widened.
oh no.. gojo is listening to this...
You cleared your throat, "yeah.. what about it?" You asked.
"Do you still feel that way?"
You laughed, "no, idiot! Who's going to protect all the non sorcerers when you try to kill them!"
"Well... Satoru.. duh," he said, you smiled.
"No.. I won't leave Satoru," you said then cleared your throat, "I don't want him to bear the burden of being the strongest all by himself," you whispered looking up at Suguru, "I'm not the strongest, but I just don't want Satoru to feel alone.." you said, Geto squinted his eyes at you.
"I mean your technique is pretty powerful and you're trained assassin, so you could come 2nd to him."
"No, then I'd take your spot," you said shoving him lightly, he chuckled.
"I'm not in this anymore, so go ahead," he said, then let out a deep breath, "he- Satoru told me that my dream is impossible. But I told him that- if I was him, my dream would be possible," he said, you stared at him, "if I had his power, my dream of eliminating all non sorcerers would become possible, isn't that right?" He asked
You sighed and leaned your head back, "I guess.."
"What?" He asked gazing at your bothered face.
"I really shouldn't be... saying this. But.. you're strong, Suguru. Your dream is possible with you being you, don't question your strength," you said, his eyes widened. "You and him were supposed to be the strongest... you think he left you behind, don't you?" You asked.
He sighed, "it's not what I think. It's what he did."
"Do you think he wanted to leave you behind?" You said, "he didn't intend to. But, when he was here with us we had so much fun and everything was normal."
"It's not that Y/n. He became the strongest and I grew to have a different ideals from him and decided to take action, that's all," he said, you sighed.
"You love Satoru, don't you?" He asked, you jumped with your eyes wide.
"Uh-"
"You're always covering for him even in our conversation just now. You stayed as a sorcerer so that you could help him, even if you exorcise just one or a few curses- you do it so Satoru doesn't get the mission and become more busy. You blamed yourself for not helping me when you had the chance because if you saved me- Satoru wouldn't have lost his best friend. Is that right?" He said looking you straight in the eye. Your hand twitched.
"Uh-"
"You don't need to admit it. I'm sure you've questioned your feelings for him a couple times- I'm sure you're questioning your feelings for him more right now, but everyone saw it, even Shoko," he said.
"Can we talk about something else?" You mumbled.
He let out a small laugh, "sure, anyways. I've pretty much said everything I wanted to say, is there anything you want to talk about?"
Then it hit you.
I have to kill him...
"Uh.. why did you want me to not tell anyone about the conversation we had that night?" You asked putting your hands in your pocket, you felt the handle of the gun and wrapped your hand around it.
Kill him.
"Because it would worry everyone. And, I knew you would keep the secret," he said. "You're the one I trust most."
Your heart sank.
Shoot him. You've done this so many times.
"It still doesn't make sense why you didn't tell anyone up until now. Why did you only tell me?" You asked.
Kill him, Y/n
He raised a brow, "are you stalling?"
Just kill him, Y/n.
"Damn..." you said leaning your head back, he raised a brow.
It began to rain with sunlight peaking through the clouds. Golden rain. The smell was nostalgic and this scenery is something you'll never forget. With the lake sparkling, rain hitting every surface in view, the golden light shining down on everything.
I can't do it..
"I'm supposed to kill you," you said, "I'm the one who's most capable of doing it." You took the gun out of your waist band and held it in your lap. He stared at the weapon then back at you. "An assassin like me would surely be capable of killing someone with no remorse or feelings."
"Or.. at least they thought I was the most capable..." you mumbled, then looked up at him, "unfortunately.. I can't kill my best friend," tossing the gun into the lake. No one was around anymore, they all left because of the sudden rain.
"I'm sorry, Suguru, I can't help but think that if I talked to you a little more and spent a little more time with you- you wouldn't have turned out like this," you said standing up, he followed your movements.
"I told you Y/n. I started realizing all of this when Riko died, you're a little too late now," he said, you gave him a sad smile.
"I guess we're enemies now."
"I guess so too," he said then held out his hand for you to shake. You smiled and engulfed him into a hug.
"Goodbye, Suguru... thank you for the best 3 years of my youth," you said, he wrapped his arms around you. You stayed like that for a while. Enjoying his presence because this would be the last time you would ever be in his arms again. Then you finally had the courage to let go.
"Thank you for saying goodbye to me and not leaving with nothing said," you giggled and gave him a sad smile.
"See you, Y/n."
"Goodbye, Suguru.."
With that. You both parted ways going in the opposite direction.
___
You walked back to Yaga and Gojo in the rain, but then you saw Shoko and Utahime standing behind them outside the building, they must've joined while you were talking with Suguru.
"Are you.. okay?" Utahime asked, you gave her a small smile while handing Yaga the mic that was once attached to your shirt.
"I don't know.. I want to go home."
The car ride back was silent almost deafening. But, it was a comfortable silence. Everyone was grieving, but you had each other. You hoped Nanami was doing well, he was the only one who wasn't there, yet you didn't have the energy to see him when you arrived at Jujutsu High.
Approaching Gojo on the stairs, you sat next to him and smiled, "how are you doing?" You asked, he shrugged.
"Fine, I guess.."
"You don't have to lie 'Toru," you said brushing his hair back. He looked at you making your heart skip a beat.
"Thank you.. for checking up on me," he said, but then looked back at the ground, "but, I kind of want to be alone right now."
You immediately pulled away from him, ignoring the ache in your heart, "of course, 'Toru," you said standing up.
"If you want to be lonely, you can always come be lonely with me," you said, "just come to my room if you want. You don't need to knock or anything." You said with a smile, he gave you a weak smile back. You turned on your heels and your grin that you had put on for Gojo dropped instantly.
The journey to your room felt like forever. You walked those hallways so many times with your friends, but by yourself- you never realized how long the hallways were. How many turns you had to take to get to the dorms.
~
Gojo was still sitting at the stairs leading to Jujutsu High, he didn't know long he was sitting there exactly, but it must've been a while. His legs were spread while he rested his cheek in the palm of his hand "how are you holding up?" Yaga asked, he scoffed and kicked a rock.
"Well, I'm here."
Yaga sighed, "do you want to quit being a sorcerer?"
Gojo sat up right, "no, surprisingly. I found how I want to live."
"And, how is that?" Yaga asked.
With a deep breath Gojo sighed, "I want to become a teacher at jujutsu high to make sure the next generation become strong intelligent sorcerers who reset the Jujutsu world. Instead of hiding like the higher ups."
"It's possible," Yaga said, Gojo threw his head back.
"I know it is. How long have I been sitting here?" Satoru asked, the sun had already set and when he sat on the stairs the sun was bright in the sky.
"More than two hours."
They stayed silent for a while until Yaga spoke up.
"... have you.. checked on Y/n?" He asked, Gojo's eyes widened.
~
And that's how Satoru found himself sprinting through the gates, the hallways of jujutsu high to your room. He totally forgot, he was so overwhelmed with everything else, he forgot about you.
He cursed at himself for pushing you away.
He stopped at his room to change into a fresh pair of pajamas then resumed running back to you. Once he made it in front of your door he let out a deep breath.
"Just come to my room if you want. You don't need to knock or anything."
He placed his hand on the knob and twisted it open. Your room was clean, neatly organized. He remember the time you told him that if your room was messy- you'd go insane. He shut the door quietly behind him.
There was moonlight peeking through your window and rested ontop of your body, bed, and parts of your room.
You were on your bed, curled in the fetal position with your head buried in the pillows. As he made his way over to your figure- he didn't miss how your jujutsu uniform was thrown in the trash. Your skirt sunk deep in the bag with your sweater barely hanging on the rim of the trashcan. You had thrown it away making him nervous.
Were you going to quit being a jujutsu sorcerer for real? He remembered Geto mentioning it in your conversation with him today.
He cleared his throat and diverted his attention back to you, "hey Y/n-"
"Ah!" you said sitting up at his voice. You wiped your tears away and flipped your tear-stained pillow to the dry side, "Toru! Hi! Sorry, I didn't hear you," you smiled, "is there something wrong?"
"Yeah," he said.
"Oh.. what is it?"
He pointed at square at your chest, "you trying to hide the fact that you were crying."
You shrugged, "I mean you scared me."
"So?" He said, then sighed wiping your wet cheeks, "just be yourself."
"I'm just not used to people seeing me cry," you smiled as he took off his sunglasses and placed them on your nightstand.
"You can cry around me, Y/n," he said, staring straight at you with those gorgeous blue irises. "Can I.. be lonely with you?" He asked, you gave him a small smile.
"Of course-"
He tackled you onto the bed, burying his face into your neck.
"Why didn't you give up being a sorcerer and live a normal life?" He asked, you leaned your head back and stared at the ceiling.
"I.. swore to myself that I would become a sorcerer to make up for all the lives I took," you said, "I also didn't want you to become more busy than you are now."
"Thanks for not leaving me," he said, you smiled slightly.
"How are you doing? Do you want to talk about anything?" You asked, he sighed.
"I think if I say anything, I'll just cry."
"Let it all out, 'Toru, it's just me and you anyways. There is no one else."
He looked up at you because of your words. The things he'd do for you. He'd give heaven to you, he'd move mountains for you, he'd do it all. Yet, he couldn't save you from the pain. If he just saved Geto, he could've saved you from the pain you're experiencing now.
He buried his face in your neck.
"I'm sorry, Y/n."
You buried your fingers in his white strands of hair, "for what, Toru?"
"I'm so sorry. I blame myself.. for not being there for Geto, if I didn't go on so many missions maybe he wouldn't have changed, maybe he wouldn't have-"
You didnt expect it.
HE didn't expect it but he choked on his own words and began to sob into your neck. Holding you so tight you could barely breathe.
"I'm so sorry."
You wrapped your arms around him, "Toru.. enough with these 'if I did this', 'if I did that'," you said, kissing his head. "I know it hurts, but you can't save everyone including the people closest to you. You heard what he said, he changed when Amanai died. You and I were both there, we couldn't do anything. So, it's not just your fault, it's mine too. Or maybe, it's none of our faults. Just don't take the blame by yourself, okay?"
You didn't care if you were letting yourself go and showering him with kisses. This is what he needed, this is what you needed. You let him cry into your neck a little more as tears rolled down your cheeks.
"This is out of our control. It was bound to happen. There's nothing we can do."
He pulled away suddenly and turned his face away from you to wipe his tears, you grabbed his wrists to stop his movements, "you can cry around me, Toru," you smiled, mocking him a bit. He laughed as you grinned.
For some reason everything felt alright with him by your side. Your room wasn't so cold anymore, there wasn't silence that slowly killed you, crying seemed better when he was there. You didn't feel so lonely anymore.
"Are you.. going to quit being a sorcerer?" He asked, joining your side in bed. You sighed.
"No.. I don't know yet. Why?"
"I have a dream, that I want you to be apart of," he said, you rolled onto your side and stared into blue eyes.
"I want to become a teacher at jujutsu high," he said.
You blinked, "why?"
"I want to raise the next generations to become strong intelligent sorcerers who fix the Jujutsu world. Instead of hiding like higher-up cowards," he said and looked you straight in the eye, "and I want you to do it with me."
Gojo grabbed your hand and began to intertwine your fingers together.
"You see.. Suguru's 'awakening' really showed me all the flaws in the structure of the jujutsu world as well as the higher ups leaving you to the task of killing Suguru proved my point, they're cowards. I don't want the next sorcerers to become like Suguru or those old geezers," he said then cupped your cheek, "I want the kids to turn out like you."
"I... love you, Y/n.." he said, your eyes widened, "I always have, since our first year."
"You're strong, capable, caring, reliable, sweet, smart, fierce, and selfless," he said then smiled, "kids like that don't sound so bad, huh?"
You couldn't help but bury yourself into his chest and cry a little more, "do you mean that?" You mumbled, he smiled and wrapped his arms around you as you looked up at him.
"I mean every word with my whole being," he said.
"I'll do it, Toru. I'll do it all with you, you're the only dream I seek," you said, then kissed his jaw, "I love you- mph!!"
He slammed his lips into yours and pushed you onto your back, pressing himself more and more into you while his hand cupped your cheek. Gojo pulled away to gasp for air and leaned his forehead against yours, "thank you for not leaving me. Thank you for making sure I don't bear the burden of being the strongest by myself. Thank you for tackling this dream with me," he said, "thank you, y/n. Thank you. There's so much happening right now."
Gojo pulled away to look you in the eye, "when I'm with you. I'm not so lonely anymore." He said, kissing your nose as the moonlight peeking from your window brushed against your facial features.
His stare made you squirm a bit, "stop staring. I probably look disgusting right now." Messy hair, tear stained cheeks, drool around your mouth, swollen puffy eyes.
But, even in your worst time, he always saw the best in you. He paid no attention to your messy hair, tear stained cheeks, drool, and swollen eyes.
He gazed at the moonlight lighting up your skin, your hair, your beautiful eyes, and glossy lips.
You sniffled as he cupped your cheek slowly and pressed a soft kiss to your lips before pulling away.
"Darling, you're glowing."
~ end
___
Gege was asked, “since Gojo is aware of his good looks doesn’t he want a lover?” and Gege responded with, “I don’t see gojo being sincere to a particular woman” it was translated as, “I don’t see Gojo settling down with a particular women.” what he actually meant by that is- he doesn’t see Gojo letting himself become vulnerable with a women. but, I also 100% think Gojo would be a whore too yknow so this is all about you- being the only person in the world who Satoru would let himself become vulnerable with.
suki's notes :
I want this to have a part 2 of you and Gojo meeting Megumi and Tsumiki with headcanons of moments you and Gojo had gone through while raising Megumi and starting your journey as a teacher at jujutsu high
Sounds cute, right? (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ ✧゚・: *ヽ(◕ヮ◕ヽ)
anyways sorry this was long as hell. i hope this did NOT disappoint. I will be sad I worked on this all day T~T
but u CANNOT tell me this last part w/ u and gojo did not represent This Side of Paradise. read the lyrics ;3
hope y'all enjoyed it ! have a great night/day <3
EDIT :
SO MANY PEOPLE LOVED THIS- I THOUGHT THIS WAS GONNA FLOP
THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT I WORKED RLLY HARD ON THIS
THANK YOU
THERE WILL BE A PART 2 - you and gojo raising and meeting megumi and starting your journey as teachers :3
I DO NOT KNOW WHEN PART 2 IS COMING OUT - WORKING ON IT RN
607 notes · View notes
lathalea · 4 months
Text
The Shrieking Monster
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨ This is a gift for @babe-bombadil as part of the @whiteoliphaunt 2023 exchange. ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨ Happy New Year everyone! 🥳
Tumblr media
Relationships: Thorin Oakenshield & Dis & little Fili & Kili Rating: G Warnings: family fluff Author's notes: A story set in the Blue Mountains about Thorin trying to be both a ruler and a good uncle at once. Young Fili and Kili are making it a tad difficult in their own cute way. Special thanks to @naryaflame for your linguistic help with a name :) If you prefer, you can read this fic on AO3.
Khuzdul: Thorinuldûm - Thorin’s Halls, the settlement of the refugees from the Lonely Mountain in the Blue Mountains Amad - mother
Tumblr media
1. 
It was a perfect morning. Thorin stretched and yawned, settling himself on his favourite chair in the kitchen. The air that whiffed into the dwarven stronghold from the outside felt warm on his cheeks and smelled like spring. As he sipped his morning tea, that strong, aromatic blend Dori bought in Bree, his sister appeared at the threshold. She gave Thorin a bright smile and, seeing her steaming mug on the table, she sat next to him. The lazy silence of the early hours of the day was soon broken by the appearance of two dishevelled pebbles, one with a thatch of golden hair, the other – with his hair as brown as a bear’s fur in winter. After the mandatory morning hugs, Thorin readied breakfast while Dís prepared her sons for the day, humming to herself. Thorin could not stop himself from smiling. His sister was probably already thinking of her visit to the market. She adored going there in the morning, especially on the days when the merchants arrived with new goods – and today was one of those days. Thorin sighed. As much as he wanted her to have a very much needed moment of respite – his sister-sons were quite a handful, to put it mildly – he was painfully aware of what it was going to mean to him. Half a day of having his eyes around his head and his ears pricked up for any unusual noises they may create… or worse – the ominous silence. In the past, there was only a handful of moments when he and Dís realised that the boys went completely silent. It never bode well. 
This day, however, started with the pitter-patter of the boys’ bare feet, chatter and laughter, and the clatter of their bowls as they ate their oatmeal. Dís reminded them to behave while she was gone, and left for the market. Fíli seemed very content about this state of things, knowing well by now that staying with his mother’s brother meant visiting various places in these halls, like forges, or assisting Thorin in other exciting ways. It was different with Kíli – his loud wails of protest at being so cruelly abandoned reverberated against the walls of their home. Thorin imagined they must have followed their mother through the corridors of Thorinuldûm for a long while. Her Little Bear, as Dís called him, was still too young to understand the connection between Mommy leaving, and the sudden appearance of candied rhubarb or his favourite cream toffees.
Distracting Kíli from his misery was not easy, but Thorin managed it by offering to take the boys for a new adventure. Their big blue eyes shone as he told them they would be going to the lower levels of the city together. It was a real treat – Kíli had never been there before and Fíli visited them only a handful of times.
Thorin had a mind to visit the Engineers’ Quarter and show the lads around while discussing some technical issues with one of the water engineers. And so they began their adventure. As they descended down the wide stone stairs Kíli stumbled and yawned, so Thorin decided to carry him the rest of the way. Soon Little Bear began snoring in his arms, and Thorin attempted to ignore the fact that his own tunic was becoming gradually soaked through with his nephew’s saliva. He also started suspecting that the moniker “Little Bear” must have surely come from the fact that Kíli seemed to weigh more and more with every step, like a true bear.
“At least he is not crying,” Thorin muttered to himself, and kept on walking. Thank Mahal for silver linings.
As they arrived at their destination, however, the situation got worse. The Engineers’ Quarter was a crowded place that smelled like tar, coal, and burned leather. Not minding the much larger adult dwarves in their soot-stained clothes who carried – or carted – their wares from one place to another, curious Fíli began rushing between them, oblivious of the chaos he was creating. He took a look at the wheelwright’s workshop here, and then he had to see the toolmaker’s booth there; he then insisted on seeing how parchment was being made, and attempted to find the place where they manufactured those shiny cogwheels. If not for his golden mane, Thorin would have lost his nephew at least a couple of times. Brór, the water engineer he had a meeting with, joined Thorin in the chase for the high-spirited boy. Instead of looking at the water supply pipeline blueprints and trying to fix a problem with water pressure, they ended up unwillingly playing a hide-and-run game to the delight of the onlookers. Seeing your own king running back and forth through the great cavern with one giggling pebble strapped to his chest while chasing after the other one must have been very amusing… for anyone but him, Thorin thought with resignation. His resignation grew even more when he noticed Fíli climbing onto a tall work table… and jumping down onto a heap of coal.
When Thorin finally caught the runaway, they were both out of breath. Although it was rather Fíli who caught his uncle – the boy ran into him and clung to his left leg as if a throng of orcs chased him.
Fíli raised his teary-eyed face to Thorin and sobbed out, “A monster wanted to eat meeee…”
“A monster? Here?” Thorin’s brow furrowed.
It took him a while to reassure Fíli that no monster was going to eat him. In turn, Thorin promised to get rid of the said monster that apparently lurked in a nearby chamber, and shrieked at him. He left his nephews in the care of Brór who tried to look solemn, but his twitching lips betrayed him. Thorin grunted and entered the chamber, carefully looking around, adjusting his eyes to the dark surroundings. And then he saw two glowing points of red. And heard the shrieking.
2.
When Thorin returned to Brór, Kíli was fast asleep once again. Leaving Little Bear in the engineer’s care once again, he took Fíli’s hand and led him to the entrance of the dark chamber. When they opened the door, they both heard the continuous shrieking now. His nephew stopped and refused to walk inside, covering his ears and closing his eyes.
“There are no monsters here, Fíli.” Thorin reassured the boy. “See for yourself.”
“Nnoooo…” muttered Fíli, hiding behind his uncle.
“Do not be afraid,” Thorin added. “Nothing will hurt you here. I promise.”
On the bench by the door stood a lantern. It took him a moment to light it. With the lantern in hand, Thorin crossed the threshold and approached the nearest lantern that hung on the wall, and then another, and another. Soon, the whole chamber was bright as day, each lantern giving off a pleasant yellow glow.
“You can come in now,” Thorin smiled encouragingly.
With his ears covered and his eyes set on the shrieking, wobbling entity in the middle of the chamber, Fíli shook his head.
“This is not a monster.” Thorin stepped towards the huge bulbous shape that made so much noise. He placed his hand on the top of the strange shaking thing and added, “This is a washing barrel.”
Fíli blinked and took a good look at it. The two red glowing points did not look like a pair of evil eyes any longer. Those were two ball-shaped lanterns standing on top of the… thing. That shrieking noise now seemed to sound like a couple of cogwheels that needed a bit of oil, and not like a monster’s screech. And the arm that seemed to reach out to grab him before, turned out to be a cast iron lever.
“A… barrel?” Fíli looked at his uncle and took one uncertain step towards him and the strange contraption.
“Correct. A barrel that washes your clothes,” Thorin explained in an even voice and at the same moment the shrieking stopped. “Look, it has just finished the washing cycle. Let me show you how it works. First, you open this hatch, like so… Watch out for the water! These clothes are clean, they only need to be wrung out and dried.”
As he spoke, Fíli slowly started closing the distance between them, his eyes becoming wider and wider.
“... but if you want to wash your clothes,” Thorin continued, “you need to put them inside, here, and add some soap suds. Then you close the hatch, pour some water here, crank this lever a few times, do this, like so, and wait for the washing barrel to finish its work!”
Thorin kept on talking until Fíli seemed to be completely in awe of this new piece of machinery, his fear completely forgotten. He peppered his uncle with tons of questions: how many cogwheels were there, how many times one should crank the lever, what the barrel was made of… and so on, and so forth. When they left the chamber, there was a big smile on the boy’s lips instead of tears. 
On their way back home Fíli exclaimed, “This was the bestest adventure ever!”
Thorin thought that sometimes being an uncle happened to be quite rewarding. Even if his tunic was still wet from Kíli’s sleepy drooling.
***
His attitude completely changed less than half an hour later, when his nephews disappeared. Both of them. At once.
Stumbling over several painfully angular wooden toys, Thorin searched the boys’ bedroom. Nothing. He even looked under their beds (twice!), but there was no sign of the boys anywhere. They weren't sitting in the common kitchen nor searching for snacks in the pantry. Nor in Dwalin’s rooms where Kíli liked to play hide-and-scare with the big warrior. There were nowhere to be found – not in the rocking chair by the fireplace, nor even in Balin’s study by that large desk where Fíli liked to play so often. Thorin closed his eyes. If he did not find his nephews before Dís returned from the market, his sister would have Thorin’s own head on a spike. The wrath of dwarf-women was ten times fiercer than the one of dwarf-men. In the case of his little sister, the number was much higher, at least a hundred times. And Thorin would do everything he could to avoid being on the receiving end of it.
There was no time to lose. He recruited Dwalin, Óin, and Halkatla, Balin’s wife, to the task of finding the boys, but they returned empty-handed. No one had seen the boys since their early lunch. Then, they were supposed to take a nap, and Thorin remembered their yawning as they closed the door to their bedroom behind him.
And now they were gone. Kidnapped? — No, impossible, Thorin thought. Dwarves cherished their children like the greatest treasures they were, and no one else was allowed into Thorinuldûm. There were no goblins nor other dangers here either. It felt as if the boys magically disappeared in a puff of smoke. Thorin looked around the wide corridor he stood in, but he found no traces of the missing boys.
“Have you checked all of their favourite places?” Halkatla asked, her red-and-silver braids clinking as she turned her head towards Óin.
“Aye, we did,” he nodded. “Not a sign of them.”
“Those wee rascals! I bet they are up to somethin’.” Dwalin said. “They remind me of us. Remember that time, Thorin, when we were around their age or so, and half of Erebor was lookin’ for us all day long?”
“It would be difficult to forget it,” Thorin admitted. “We wanted to avoid another boring lesson with our tutor…”
“...and instead we went to explore the mines! What a shame we lost our way,” Dwalin grinned and nudged him. “It was fun!”
“Aye, fun on an empty belly. If only you had not forgotten our food,” Thorin replied, relieved that his nephews had a proper meal at least.
“If only ye had not forgotten that map ye were supposed to borrow from your father’s desk,” Dwalin chuckled.
Before Thorin could form an adequate riposte, a mousy-haired dwarf approached him.
“M’lord, Master Brór says that the pipeline is fully functional again,” the messenger bowed.
Thorin gave him a nod of thanks. At least he brought a piece of good news. Master Brór was a skilled engineer, and the way he handled Thorin’s own sister-sons…
“Either way,” Dwalin continued, “we had a real adventure on that day, hadn’t we, Thorin?”
A thought appeared in Thorin’s mind. Master Brór. An adventure.
“There was one place where we have not searched yet,” he turned to his companions.
“I am listening,” Halkatla tilted her head, reminding him of a curious raven.
“The Engineers’ Quarters.”
***
Master Brór was more than happy to receive words of thanks from Thorin in person for fixing that pipeline issue once and for all. Despite Thorin’s hopes, he had not seen Fíli or Kíli since they left the Engineers’ Quarters with their uncle earlier that day. Dwalin muttered a curse under his breath.
“Well, that’s it. I’m goin’ to check the workshops,” the warrior said.
“I’ll take the ones on the left, you take the ones on the right,” Halkatla followed him.
“Let’s go,” Dwalin replied, his voice trailing off as he walked away. “And those wee cave bats would better be there or I swear…”
Master Brór addressed Thorin, “I will spread the word as you requested, my lord. Someone must have seen them, I am certain of it. They could not have simply disappeared.”
Thorin agreed with him and began his own search. The rocks could not have swallowed them whole! Magic was out of the question as well, there had to be a logical solution to this! Thoring pulled at his short beard in frustration. Wandering through the area and looking for any signs of his nephews in places they visited earlier that day, he wondered if Óin had any luck. The healer was waiting at their home in case Fíli and Kíli returned there on their own. Perhaps the three of them were already sitting by the fire, with Óin telling the boys countless amusing stories, while Thorin and his companions were checking every nook and cranny on the lower level, going out of their minds with worry. He raised his head, listening to a peculiar sound and trying to figure out its source. It sounded like… shrieking. It was not at all difficult to recall Fíli’s eyes shining with fear, awe, and then curiosity at the sight of the washing barrel.
Without thinking, Thorin turned his steps towards the chamber that housed the “monster” Fíli had been so afraid of not so long ago.
When Thorin arrived at his destination, the door was ajar. Thorin could hear the shrieking very well, but there were other sounds too. Very familiar sounds.
He took a deep breath and shouted, “Dwalin! I found them!”
***
When Thorin stepped inside the chamber, the sounds became even clearer. One of them he identified as uncontrollable giggling, and the other one, slightly muted, sounded like: “Woooo! Woooo! Wooooo! A carousel! Woooo! Faster, Fíli! Woooo!”
Thorin breathed out a sigh of relief only to be struck by a pang of dread a moment later.
Fíli stood by the washing barrel, cranking the lever, grinning from ear to ear, and laughing. Kíli was nowhere to be seen, but his enthusiastic shouts seemed to be coming from inside of the barrel. Inside, not outside. Thorin swallowed; he considered screaming in terror, but something told him that this was most definitely an example of behaviour unworthy of a king. It took him a moment to melt the ball of ice that was forming in his stomach. He closed the distance between him and the barrel in a blink of an eye.
Thank Mahal, the hatch was open. Inside, Kíli sat with his back against a wall of the large metal container inside the machine, surrounded by various articles of laundry, with a happy grin on his face, and a stray sock on top of his head. A wave of relief washed over Thorin.
“Uncle Thorin! Uncle Thorin!” Fíli exclaimed. “We’re playing carousel! Want to jump in?”
Thorin did not.
“It is time to return home, boys,” Thorin simply said, taking Kíli out of the barrel. His clothes were damp and he smelled like those violet flowers Dís liked so much, but other than that, he looked happy, and what’s more important, he was in one piece – just like his older brother.
“But uncle...” Fíli started.
“Your amad will be home soon. Do you not want to see what she bought at the market?”
“A sugar horse? She promised!” The boy recalled his favourite treat.
Holding Kíli firmly against his chest with one arm, Thorin held out his hand to Fíli.
“Let us go and see,” he said with a smile as his nephew’s tiny hand grabbed his.
There would yet be time for scolding and for a conversation about not sneaking out anywhere alone, but for now, the only thing that Thorin wanted was to safely bring his little rascals home.
He only hoped they would manage to reach their halls before Dís returned.
***
When Dís crossed the threshold of their home later in the afternoon, she was greeted by complete silence. Her sons were nowhere to be seen, which was very suspicious. They were always the first ones to run to her and see what she brought them this time. She expected Thorin to welcome her and help her unpack her basket, as usual — but he was not there either. Was this that ominous silence she dreaded so much whenever her boys were executing another of their silly mischiefs? Not really. It seemed as if their home was empty… until she heard a familiar sound coming from a nearby chamber. Dís put the basket on the floor and tiptoed deeper into their halls.
The picture that unfolded before her eyes was the last thing she had expected. Her brother was half sitting, half lying on the sofa, his legs stretched out in front of him, his head resting on the backrest, his eyes closed. Fíli was cuddled up to his uncle’s side, his hair tousled, making her think of a skein of golden yarn. Kíli lay on the opposite side of his uncle, his head resting on Thorin’s lap and turned towards her. He had his thumb in his mouth. Dís could clearly see the darker stain of drool on her brother’s trousers and stifled a giggle. 
All three of them were asleep, of course. And all three of them were snoring in perfect unison. If she closed her eyes she could almost imagine that she had a working sawmill in front of her.
This scene was too adorable for Dís to interrupt it, so she decided that she would let her three boys sleep a little longer. There was no harm in a little nap, after all. Besides, she was tired, and there was still some space left on the sofa…As she drifted off to sleep beside them, her last conscious thought was: “Why do all three of them smell like my lavender laundry soap?”
Tumblr media
💙💙💙 Read it? Like it? Spread the love and reblog it! 💙💙💙
📜 Searching for more stories to read? Check out my masterlist!📜
Do you like my writing? Would you like to read more? Feel free to show your support by having a Ko-fi with me! Thank you 💙
Special taglist (once upon a time you requested to be tagged in this story): @gwen-ever, @oaken-dick, @fizzyxcustard, @shrimpsthings, @cassiabaggins
General taglist (let me know if you'd like to be added/removed): @I-am-the-raven-queen @ruthoakenshield @asgardianhobbit98 @justfollowtheroad @therealpizzaplanetdeliveryguy @fizzyxcustard @shrimpsthings​ @dark-angel-is-back @sherala007 @anyaspidergirl-blog @jotink78 @rachel1959 @saltwater-in-the-afternoon @linasofia @legolasbadass @bitter-sweet-farmgirl @yourqueenunderthemountain @reblogunderthemountain @guardianofrivendell @elrawienthewhite @xmly-xo @mrsdurin @nelleedraws @beenovel @vee-vee-writes @mcchiberry  @dumbassunderthemountain @errruvande @laurfilijames @emrfangirl @s0ftd3m0n @lilith15000 @kami-chan1512 @ragsweas @enchantzz @aduialel @myselfandfantasy @thewhiteladyofrohan @middleearthpixie @i-did-not-mean-to @blairsanne @fckmini @clumsy-wonderland @wormsmith @mailinsblogofstuff 
188 notes · View notes
teyamloving12 · 1 year
Note
Bbbyyyy💕💕💕👀 Neteyam fic… all imma say is Neteyam fiiicc!!! 🔥🔥🔥 God damn i almost passed out reading it, that’s how good it is
Pleaseeee write more of him, i’m even gonna beg for it ❤️
Taking what is His
Tumblr media
Warning: NSFW content (MDNI), cheating, arranged marriage, angst, breeding kink, angry!Neteyam, etc.
Pairing: Neteyam x Omatikaya!Reader
Synopsis: You were Neteyam's first but your parents promised you to another man. Like hell Neteyam will allow that to happen.
A/n: Your wish is my command sweetheart. Have some possessive Neteyam. 500 followers special!
You were Neteyam's but that "cunt" came in your life. Your relationship flourished beautifully before he left for the Metkayina clan. Distraught took over your soul. You mate-to-be was leaving. Would he come back to You? What if he found a woman more beautiful than you could ever be? Those were the question your younger self would ask herself.
It's been 8 years ever since that day. Probably he is living happily with a woman. No! You couldn't think about him. You had a mate. You didn't like him very much, he tries to be the carbon copy of Neteyam and continuously failing after you begged him to stop. He showed you off to his friends as you were his trophy and a prize that he won. Neteyam would never.
You went to the Tree of Souls praying your Neteyam, the man you truly love, would return to you in a safe conditions. You visited the Mountains and sat at the cliff waiting. About to give up, one day you saw ikrans flew to the west, towards the village. Your eyes widen, your Neteyam was finally back. You rushed down to the village. It was true. It was him. He looked different, tattoos were found on his stomach and face also with his arms and legs.
He was a warrior here and a warrior at sea. His handsome demeanor struck you unlike when you were with Ka'wan. He was good looking but could never compared to Neteyam. The girls beside you looked at him in awe stating how he become even more handsome. You walked away from the crowd, thinking Neteyam could never love you again. Maybe he had changed. Maybe he was not the same Neteyam 8 years ago.
Neteyam went straight to her grandmother's hut. "Where is she, grandmother? I have looked everywhere!", he asked in a panic. " She is a woman now, Neteyam. Do you still expect her to live with her parents?", she asked, making him realized what was happening. " So where is she?", he asked again.
" Do you see the hut over there?", she pointed. He nodded. "You will find her there but I warn you you may not like what you will hear.", Neteyam looked confused but heeded his grandmother's words. On his way, he saw a man exiting your hunt. Who was he?
You were cleaning up your hut until you felt a presence behind you. "Tìyawn, I have returned back to You!", he said hugging you from behind. Your Neteyam was here by your side and you smiled widely. He let you. He watched as you scanned your surroundings. "Neteyam, I'm so happy you're back but you can't stay here!", you whisper-yelled. Neteyam as angry, he was finally back yet you were pushed him away.
"What is wrong, ma syulang?", he questioned. "Neteyam I don't know how to say this but you can't call you yours anymore for I'm promised to someone.", you explained. That explained the man that walked out of your hut. He was furious, he backed you up to the hut's wall. You were scared. He grabbed you by your chin forcing you to look at him.
"So after I nearly died at the Metkayina and kept you in my heart for eight fucking years, you had the nerve, the enfrontery to mate with another man!", you trembled in his hands. Tears stung your eyes as he continued to shout at you. You tried to push him off you.
"Neteyam, please!", you begged. "It was my parents! They hoped you would come back earlier but they feared I would be lonely for the rest of my life!", you yelled back, Neteyam finally calmed down, letting up of your chin. "What! I'm the son of Toruk Makto, a mighty warrior yet they had no hope for me!", he yelled before tried to calm himself. He looked at you lovingly, backing you up towards the bed.
You fell on the bed and Neteyam crawled over you. He kissed your neck and then headed for your cheek and then your lips. "You were mine then and you are still mine now.", he said with your bottom lip touched yours. You closed your eyes and smiled remembering your sweet memories when you were teenagers in love. You loved him but Ka'wan was still a person.
"Wait! We can't do this, Neteyam. Ka'wan-", you tried to explain but you silenced you with her finger. He slowly tried your top. "You're as beautiful as I remember.", you kissed from your chest to your stomach and paused at your loincloth. He looked up at you for consent which you granted. He grabbed for his loincloth and pulled it out.
"You and I are meant to be.", he said sliding himself into you. You squealed as the pleasure of the man you truly loved was inside of you. You pulled him in for a kiss. This was meant to be. "Ma'Teyam, I'm yours.", you said. He thrusted inside of you. "You're mine, my mate, the mother of all my children!", he said as he rammed into you like a mad man. He grabbed your hips allowing him to go either further.
"I gonna make you get birth to MY children, not his!", you tried to push him. "No--ahh-- I will be a shame to my family--nnmgh-- the village people will talk!", you said through your moans. "I am future olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya, no one will have a word to say of you.", you felt your cunt giving wetter by his words. "Move your hips, tìyawn! Eywa made us for each other.", he stated with each thrust touching your womb. You grabbed the soft sheet on the bed, you closed your eyes from the pleasure overwhelming your body.
You felt your pussy clench around his cock. You came inside of you. You moaned from ecstasy. You wrapped your hand around Neteyam as he fell in your chest. "You are my woman, the mother of all my children, Tsahik !", he said. "We are meant to be, Ma'Teyam.", you whispered, not caring Ka'wan was the man you were promised to.
786 notes · View notes
Note
Idk if this is Hunger AU canon or my own personal fanon but
one of the "calling cards" that the Watchers used in Evo was bedrock
bedrock is unbreakable by a player
perfect for trapping the player you're using as a Watcher incubator
and the texture looks rough af
when you get desperate you often try to do stuff to escape even if it's impossible, right
so what I'm saying is
probably one of the last things player!Grian did was tearing his hands to shreds trying to break bedrock out of sheer desperation
which makes all the passages in your fic where he's staring at his hands even more *gestures vaguely*
(idk why I typed this out in this format but it felt right so I'm going with it)
MAN OKAY THIS IS SUPER COOL i especially adore how youve connected it with the way i keep having Grian stare at his own hands???? which ftr is smth ive only just now realized i do all the time AKDBWKDJKSSJ this is JUST like the scarian jaw kisses thing HELPPPP 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 but thats such a cool thought!!! And utterly angsty i love it >:]
Its also made me realize i dont think ive ever actually told yall what did happen during that interim where Grian was captive as a Player before he died and became a Watcher, so buckle in i guess as i try to explain this one to yall (obligatory cws for captivity, parasitism, violated autonomy, body horror, and major character death discussion)
Yknow the world borders the life series has?? It was like that, but tiny. Maybe a couple chunks' worth of space to move around in. He spawned into a savannah biome and the Watchers specifically in charge of keeping an eye on him (pun intended) penned him in with the borders, implanted the specially-coded larva, and then retreated back just outside the server's barrier code to, well. To Watch.
So post Evo dragon fight the Watchers convinced Grian to join them without telling him what that entailed. They then proceeded to whisk him away to the server cluster's dev crystal, which is where the remnants of this Watcher colony made their semi-permanent home. There, held together basically only by the Watchers' ability to manipulate code, they had Grian make a brand new server.... and immediately trapped him in it.
He spent a year there slowly dying, eaten from the inside out by a parasite that was collecting his memories, copying over his stats and personality, with very limited space and resources to get by with. I know he built a tiny house out of acacia, but it never got any bigger than a starter base. He lived off of mostly bread and the meat from a few animals that spawned in with him; he primarily used stone tools, because those were what was most readily available. It was a very terrifying and lonely year, where all access to the outside world was cut off, and he was meticulously watched over to keep from dying while the larva inside him continued to grow and destroy him.
The Watchers were mostly hands-off in terms of interaction, but they did do regular check-ins to ensure the larva was alive and that there was no danger present to its host. Hostile mobs were carefully warded off, and Grian spent most of his time alternating between begging them to let him go (they never responded), trying to figure out ways to escape (it never worked), and tending to baseless chores just to keep from going out of his mind as his body grew weaker and weaker and more unstable around him.
I have a lot of feelings about this tbh, bc its just such a bleak scenario to think about-- trapped in a tiny cage with something killing you from the inside out, and your captors wont even talk to you about it properly. Being left otherwise to your own devices, with the terrible, lingering knowledge that, even if it was under duress, you still agreed to this. The fact that, after a certain point, after your questions and pleas are summarily ignored and brushed aside, you finally realize: you aren't meant to survive this. You are going to die.
A juvenile Watcher's first meal are the emotions during their host's last few moments. Grian was no exception; he cracked his way out of his own ribcage, and, without meaning to, amplified and feasted on Player!Grian's agony and terror as he died. With their memory codes finally disconnected, Grian had to watch himself through the eyes of a stranger as his terrified consciousness dissolved and his body fell apart into nothing more than loose strings of code.
Only then, still weak and flailing and helpless, was he was brought into the colony proper, in order to teach him how to be a Watcher. It wouldnt be for another few years before Grian gained the strength, control, and insight required to make his desperate escape. In total, i wanna say he spent somewhere between.... 4-6 years??? with the colony against his will. It would take another 4 for him to finally scrape together the courage to contact Mumbo and finally ask him for an invite into the Hermitcraft proper
One of these days i do plan to write that reunion, actually, which i'll add to the series as another prequel just like all the words that i forgot to say, which takes place roughly 6-8 months after Grian finally joins Hermitcraft. And if yall want to read an absolutely fantastic fic that deals with the moment Watcher!Grian was born and Player!Grian died, you should absolutely check out my friend @raichett 's fic Divergency, which ive pretty much canonized bc it REALLY hits the nail on the head for that situation.
Okay this got a lot longer than i meant it to sidhskdjej also those timeframes are a little squiggly bc i havent fully settled on where they fall on the general timeline. I wanna say Grian had been a Watcher for abt a decade by the time Mumbo got him onto Hermitcraft, though, so thats the loose timeline im working off of when i talk abt this :] anyway thanks for giving me an excuse to write this all out!!! while your idea about the bedrock isnt necessarily canon, i absolutely ADORE it and can totally see Grian just tearing up his hands while scrabbling against the world border.... utterly heartbreaking we fucking LOVE to see it. Thanks for sending in your ask!!! I always love seeing what you have to say about hunger au!!! :DDD
78 notes · View notes
piichuu · 7 months
Note
happy 1k again, tuva <3
i’d like to request prompt number 4 w fushiguro megumi 🙈💗 can’t wait to see what u’ll write !
thank u ૮₍ ˃ ᵕ ˂ ₎ა (and mb have fun w it hehe)
♡ MEMORIES OF LIFE - FUSHIGURO MEGUMI
WARNINGS: fluff, gn!reader
WORD COUNT: 749
NOTES: thank you sm for this request saki <3333
PROMPTS: 4. “don’t cry for me”
Tumblr media
the light of the sun breaks through the windows during this cold autumn evening, bringing the last bit of warmth before it’s time to finally accept that summer truly is over.
the warm season has brought you more than it took, one of those being fushiguro megumi who is now sitting on the couch in your living room. your head is resting on his shoulder as you have finally begged him to tell you about his life, to open up to the one person who’s gotten to his heart after years of building up a wall.
his voice is a little raspy after the amounts of hours he’s been stuck in a classroom, having to talk to a few classmates. that in itself has been enough to exhaust the dark haired boy, but that won’t stop him from finally being honest with you.
“i honestly don’t remember a lot from when i was younger, but there are a few things i remember. do you really want to hear it all?” megumi looks down at you who’s eyes are already stuck to his face, intently listening to every word he has to say after keeping quiet about his past for such a long time, even after you had been ranting about every single life change you’d been going through during your childhood.
a nod of your head is all he needs as confirmation before continuing to speak. “i remember that my mom died when i was young and that my dad left not soon after. i don’t know who he is, but i just have that strong memory of everything i felt back then. it was pretty lonely,” he sighs while leaning back against the cushion.
“after my step-sister’s parents disappeared too, we kinda just had each other. it wasn’t really difficult being without my dad, i don’t really think he ever truly cared about me. and even though i don’t remember my mom well, i still feel this strong bond to her, you know? she was my mom after all and if she hadn’t died, life would probably have been much more different, but maybe tsumiki wouldn’t have become my step-sister…”
megumi goes quiet for a few seconds, now looking down at you who’s eyes are closed while listening. one of his arms is wrapped around your middle and he pulls you slightly closer. “and then, gojo came and pretty much took us in as if we were his own children. he raised us both and helped me become a jujutsu sorcerer. he’s definitely annoying, but if it weren’t for him, i have no idea where i would have been right now. he pretty much saved both me and tsumiki and i’m really happy that he became my father figure.”
when you don’t say anything as he finally finishes his story, he leans his head against yours, hoping to get something out of you. but what he can hear is a sniffle, not words. in an instant, his eyes grow wide and he cups your face to get a better look at you who now has tears dropping down your cheeks.
“i’m sorry, i’m just happy that everything is better for you now, and i feel so sorry about that you had to go through all of that, losing both of your parents, that your dad didn’t have enough balls to stay and take care of you,” you mumble as megumi gently wipes the tears of your face with the pad of his thumb. a light chuckle escapes his throat as there is a ghost of a smile on his face.
“don’t cry for me,” he speaks while you lean into the warmth of his touch. “i’m not sad about it anymore, i have gojo, all of my friends and you now. i barely ever think about it these days, so don’t worry about me, alright?”
you nod and put your arms around his neck. megumi is a little taken aback by how you cling onto him like this, but he soon wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you onto his lap where the two of you stay for the rest of the evening, just holding onto each other while he has to continue to tell you that there is no need to feel sorry for him. that won’t stop you from doing just that though, but it is thanks to you that he finally gathered the courage to talk about it, so maybe it’s all okay.
Tumblr media
TAG LIST: @moonmalice @nobody289x @timetobegone @satoryaa @libbyistired @q2iepie @becsmarvel @classytbitch @h4nman @thisbicc @playboicartina @fuckimgenderfluid @nerdiel-has-no-braincells @awkwardaardvarkforever @chilichopsticks @satohruu @sad-darksoul @cjm-cookiethief @scaraslover @isagikisser
if you want to join the tag list, fill out this form <33
Tumblr media
193 notes · View notes
five-rivers · 2 months
Text
Just One Day (Chapter 1)
During times like this, Iroh glimpses what Zuko could have been if Lu Ten lived.  
It’s easy, almost painfully so, for Iroh to see what he himself would have been.  He wouldn’t have had any reason to change, after all, and he had already been old by the time he’d breached the walls of Ba Sing Se.  But for Zuko?  That’s harder.  
Zuko had been a child, still forming, still being formed, when Lu Ten died.  Zuko’s training would have taken a very different path, if he had been allowed to remain a mere cousin to the crown prince.  
Looking at what could have been for Zuko is like looking into a kaleidoscope.  Even within the confines of the royal house, there are a thousand paths Zuko could have walked.  A diplomat, a priest, a soldier, a scholar, an artist, an advisor.  A spy.  An assassin.
It’s the way Zuko pours himself out of the ventilation shaft, utilizing a economy of motion that could be called graceful that does it.  The utter silence of his movements, the color of his clothes, the brightness in his eyes…  Yes.  Iroh sees what Zuko might have been.  What he might have been used for, in another world.  What even Iroh himself might have been encouraged.
But if Iroh would imagine that world, he might as well imagine any of the dozen others that have crossed his mind over the years.  That countless myriad of what-ifs set on him like a spirit plague.  If he imagines that world, he could instead picture kinder ones.  Ones where the war was over, where Zuko was happy.  
It was immaterial.  What mattered was the here and now.  Here and now, Zuko is none of those things.  Zuko is an exile, a desperate one, chasing after a rapidly narrowing beam of hope that had more in common with the lure of an angler-shark than anything good.
“Uncle?” asks Zuko, voice quiet and rough.  Burnt.
“My apologies, Nephew,” says Iroh.  “You must forgive an old man his woolgathering.”
Zuko’s pinched expression says that no, he doesn’t have to do that and probably won’t.  “You have to focus if-- if we’re doing this.  You can’t be distracted when Zhao is looking over your shoulder.”  His tone is angry.  At least, that is how most people would interpret it.
“It’s alright, it’s alright, I’ve made sure we’re alone.  We’re as safe as we can be.  In the meantime, food!  And more importantly, tea.”
Zuko scrunches his face into an expression that is both delightfully teenage and undoubtedly painful.  His face is covered in bruises and small cuts.  “Uncle…”
“You may wrinkle your nose, Prince Zuko, but every person in the world has at least one virtue, and Admiral Zhao’s is excellent taste in tea.”  He smiles as he sits down and reaches for the pot.  “Although, I am sorry to say that his virtue is a very lonely one.”
Sadly, this does not get the laugh Iroh was hoping for.  Zuko’s scowl may, however, become slightly less pronounced.  He also, once Iroh sits down, falls on the food like a starving man.  He might very well be.  Iroh’s position on the ship and in Admiral Zhao’s retinue has the unfortunate requirement of being in Zhao’s presence, or that of his trusted subordinates, most of the day.  This means that he cannot help his nephew nearly as much as he would like.  
So.  It is, in fact, very likely that this is Zuko’s first meal today.
Although, Zuko is quite capable of theft, when it serves his purposes and sense of honor.  Maybe he is just being a teenager.  Teenagers are hungry.  
Iroh would ask, but he doubts he would receive an honest answer, either way.  
Then, Zuko stops, mid-bite.  “Uncle,” he says around a dumpling, “have you eaten?”
Then again, Iroh is, perhaps, not a bastion of honesty himself.  “Of course!”  He pats his stomach.  “Have you ever known me to miss a free meal?”
Zuko squints at this, then looks back down at his food.  He doesn’t start eating again.  
“Do you ever…” he starts, before pursing his lips together.  
“Yes?” prompts Iroh, hopefully.  
“Do you ever wish,” says Zuko, quickly, the words tumbling over each other, crowding to get out of his mouth, “that you were someone else?”  He freezes, then, jaw clenched tightly, as if he fears that he has spoken out of turn.  
“No,” says Iroh, glad that, at least, this is a familiar fear.  “No.  Prince Zuko, I do not regret my decision to be with you.”
“That’s not what I mean,” says Zuko, clearly frustrated but keeping his voice at a near whisper.  “I mean…  Do you ever wish that you weren’t-- That you didn’t--  That you were a, I don’t know, a poet, or a priest, or a-- a normal person.  Somewhere.  Someone who didn’t… didn’t have to…”  He shrugged.
Iroh blinks.  Not a fear, then, perhaps.  Well, if Zuko wants to stop his hunt, to disappear from the eye of the Fire Nation and more importantly the Fire Lord, Iroh will do his best to make that happen, and with a glad heart.  Although, it would have been far more convenient if Zuko had his change of heart before he snuck onto this ship…
“I suppose all men do so at times, especially men of power.  Otherwise, why would there be so many stories of kings and lords in disguise?  Why would there be actors, or the masks of the Fire Festival?  I confess, even I have, hm, occasionally pretended to be someone who is not Prince Iroh of the Fire Nation, General and Dragon of the West.”  He paused.  “Do you wish for such a thing, Nephew?” best to not use his title and remind him of the responsibilities attached to it.
“I… I have, uncle.”  He looks up, alarm clear on his face.  “Not permanently!  Not forever!  Not-- Not even for very long!  But sometimes…”  He looks down again, a blush spreading across skin that is alternately pale, scarred, burned, bruised, and scraped.  “I wish,” he says, very quietly indeed, “I could be someone else, anyone else, just for a day.”
In that moment, Iroh can see all the things that Zuko wishes not to be, not to have.  He wishes not to hurt, not to be hurt, not to have this weight upon him, not to have this duty, not to be banished, not to be so far from home, not to be part of this war, not to have these memories, this history, not to be betrayed over and over again.
Although, that is probably not the way Zuko is thinking about it.
“But just for a day,” says Zuko.  He swallows.  “Just for a day.  I know my duty, Uncle.  I love our people.  It’s my honor to serve them.”
Ah.  Perhaps Zuko is not, quite, ready to run away with him to become nameless, faceless Earth Kingdom peasants, then.  Well, Iroh always knew this was going to be, how should he put it, a work in progress.  Or, no, that probably wasn’t the best way to put that.  He’d have to think on it.  
Metaphors took a lot of work that the youth of today just didn’t appreciate.
Iroh put his hand on Zuko’s shoulder and squeezed it as tightly as he dared.  “I understand, Prince Zuko,” he said.  “But I hope that someday, the spirits will grant your wish.”
Zuko blinked hard, then went back to inhaling his meal.  A few minutes later, he was climbing - practically levitating - his way back up into the vents.  
Iroh leaned back, sighing.  They really shouldn’t make those things as big as they did.  
.
Zuko crawled to the bend in the ventilation shaft that he’d been sleeping in while Zhao sailed north.  It was near the showers, so while it was unpleasantly damp, it was warm and he could sometimes overhear the officers talking.  
He curled up, tucking in his knees and pillowing his head on the small bag of necessities he’d been able to put together.  He should sleep.  He needed to sleep.  
But to sleep, he’d have to forget all the stupid things he had said to his uncle.  What had he been thinking?  Ugh.  He’d hit something, if that wouldn’t give away his position and therefore his presence.  
Well.  It might not, at that.  Ships were noisy.  Still.  
Still.  
Still, he hadn’t been lying.  But he knew better than to just say things like that.  That’s what got him exiled in the first place.  
He forcefully closed his eyes.  He would sleep.  He had to be rested, to break into the north pole and capture the Avatar.  
.
The sun slowly rose over the arctic horizon, waking all of the fleet’s firebenders, even if for only a moment, depending on their shift.  In his stateroom, Admiral Zhao woke slowly, and called for his aides to brief him.  Decks below, General Iroh, already awake, ran through a set of katas he had not yet taught his nephew.  In a ventilation duct near the officer’s showers, a teenage firebender gasped, coming awake all at once.  But this teenager wasn’t Prince Zuko.  Prince Zuko wasn’t on the ship.  Prince Zuko wasn’t anywhere.  
In the ventilation duct, Kuzon of Hing Wa sat up.  
.
(The moral of the story is ‘don’t make wishes when you’re in a spirit tale.’)
76 notes · View notes
Text
𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐋𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫/𝐃𝐢𝐞𝐠𝐨'𝐬 𝐃𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞...
Tumblr media
Being Luthers daughter would be rather boring
You never knew who your mother was, Luther had been with a few women on missions and one day you appeared on the doorstep. They DNA tested you and you and Luther were a match
(Yes I'm aware in canon Luther is a virgin until he goes to some furry convention but shhhh, its for the story)
Because he was on the moon, you didn't get to see him for so long
You became adjusted to being raised by Grace
You, like your father, had been born with special abilities. You didn't find out for years what it was but as you got older you discovered that you had the power of telekinesis
When Luther was around when you were younger, he was a very boring dad
You'd be grounded instantly for the tiniest things
There were very few times you had fun with him when you were much younger, he rarely ever had time for you
Then he had to go to moon and that was the last time you saw him for years
There were very high expectations for you after being raised by Grace, Reginald and Pogo for 4 years while your father was gone
Reginald decided to train you, even called you number eight
Grace never referred to you as number eight, only ever by name
You were taught by them so you were very smart
They kept you inside, not many people knew of your existence, only those you lived with knew about you
Once Reginald had died, you met the rest of your family
And you were also reunited with your dad
He was much bigger when he came back, but so were you
When he saw you for the first time he was rather shocked
"(Y-Y/N)? Is that you?"
"Well.. yeah. Thought you might recognise your own daughter."
"O-oh, you're just so much... older."
"Thats kinda how aging works, dad."
As boring as he was as a father, you were so happy to be reunited with him
Once you started talking to Klaus though, you were wreaking havoc constantly
You got to meet Allison and quickly sensed something between her and your dad, which was weird considering she was your aunt
It was probably nothing.. right?
Diego didn't exactly like you in the beginning because you were Luthers daughter
He quickly learned to love you once he learned you weren't like Luther, he loved to team up against your dad with you
He always took you out and let you do things your dad never let you do, doing all this just to spite your dad and it worked
"Diego! I told you she wasn't allowed to have that!"
"No shit, that's why I did it"
You just stood in the corner laughing, thinking of the next thing you'd get Diego to do for you
Meeting Five was... strange
He was impressed by your smarts compared to Luther
You didn't ever get a chance to properly bond with Five, yknow with all the saving the world stuff
Your dad didn't really like you being around Viktor, he thought that if you tried bonding with him he'd spill your secrets and even reveal your existence and put you in danger
You had never actually left the house so once you met your uncles and they let you out of the house, you were ecstatic
Once you got to the 1960s, you felt so lost and lonely
You'd never been by yourself before, it was terrifying for you, you had always been with someone
You had to try find your way around a world you'd barely ever explored, eventually you learned how to navigate yourself and be by yourself
Well not entirely by yourself, when people found some strange teenage girl wandering around by herself, looking scared to death they took you to an orphanage and you stayed there for 2 years
People never wanted to adopt teenagers, especially not when they were nearing adulthood. Until one day when you were called into a room to meet someone
It was your dad, he had somehow figured out where you were, you soon learned he had found out because of his boss but you didnt care, you were just overjoyed to see your dad again
He took you back to some random store, where you were reunited with your family, you couldn't have been happier to finally see everyone again. Though you didn't know your family that well, you loved them more than anything and when they saw you, they leaped to hug you.
You had to attend the family dinner with your dad, uncles and aunt
You just sat there awkwardly throughout the whole experience, Reginald was shocked to learn he had a grandchild and was further shocked by your intelligence
You demonstrated your powers to him and began to recite things he had taught you, he kept you behind after the dinner to talk to you
Luther was very opposed to this idea but allowed it to happen
When you were at the farm and the battle began, your father was purely focused on protecting you. As the bullets flew through the air, he picked you up and used himself as your personal shield. Your eyes were ringing from the sounds of the shots and he covered your ears for you
You were terrified, you'd never really been exposed to this before. The only time that you had experienced something like this was at the bowling alley and at Viktors violin show but even that didn't even compare to what you were experiencing there.
Once all the commission was wiped out, you were in the barn, watching as Diego had a heart to heart with Lila until a shot rang out
Diego collapsed to the floor, the handler stood in the doorway with a gun and suddenly
She fired it at all of you
You collapsed to the floor
Then Five reversed time and you then had to travel back to your original timeline.
Well, you thought it was the original timeline
(Not gonna do HC for season 3 in this because there's already so much for Luther)
𝐃𝐢𝐞𝐠𝐨, #2
Tumblr media
Diego is a funnish (???) dad
You came from a one night stand that Diego forgot about
Nearly a year later, Al called him to tell him a 3 month-old had just been dropped off at the gym and it apparently belonged to Diego
Though, as soon as he saw you, he remembered the hook up because you looked just like your mother will small resemblances to Diego
He was scared to be a dad, his father was so cruel, abusive and distant
Diego didn't want you to be raised with the same hatred that he had for his own father
He's a busy guy, you were mostly raised at the gym with Al
You were also raised by Eudora, she was like a mother to you
But any free time Diego had, he was determined to spend with you
He loved you dearly, he lived for you
When you were much younger, around 4, you had wandered out of Al's sight and watched your dad training
You were inspired by watching your dad train, you wanted to try too
Diego heard some small grunts and looked over to you
There you were, mimicking the sounds and punching moved he was making, his heart melted
But he was very mad at Al for letting you wander out of sight
After seeing you, he decided to start training you
You had lots of fun with your dad
You went to public school, your dad couldn't afford anything fancy
If you ever got detentions, Diego would just laugh, he found it hilarious
When he was with Eudora, she encouraged you to be a good student, you rarely listened but you truly loved her so you did try
Then your grandfather died, which meant Diego had to attend his funeral, but he didnt want you staying at the gym for too long by yourself and decided to take you with him
That's when you finally met the rest of your family, they were rather shocked to learn Diego had a kid
When Eudora died, your heart broke, you just cried, cried and cried
Diego attempted to comfort you but it didn't work too well, you really did miss her
You were used to being around Klaus, your dad often picked him up from jail when he got in trouble or would find him on the side of the road and take him back to your place
Klaus was fascinated to know that he now had another niece, he bonded with you quickly and took care of you when Diego was gone
Well, he tried to take care of you, he more messed around with you whilst Ben reminded him to be gentle and responsible with you
Klaus was your best friend, you didn't get along with a lot of people at school and Klaus was your escape from that
He was so funny and eccentric, he was way better than all the kids at school. Diego didn't think the same, he thought Klaus was a bad influence on you but you never cared
Meeting the rest of your family was certainly strange
Luther didn't exactly like you but fuck him, he was annoying anyway so you didn't care
Allison liked you slightly more because you reminded her of Claire in some ways
Your dad didn't let you speak to Viktor, the most you could do was give an awkward wave
It was strange to finally meet your family, but you were happy you did
(Sorry loves, I'm not gonna write much for Diego because I've already done something pretty much exactly like this in the past)
(A/N) : Hope you enjoy reading this, I really hate it but i hope you guys like it!
Taglist: @book-place @shefollowedthestars
240 notes · View notes
sunny-speaks · 10 months
Text
Smartass
Characters: Academic Rival! Ren @14dayswithyou x reader
Okay, but I have been an academic rivals to lovers stan for far too long, y’all don’t understand…
So like, this au would totally have redacted still the same as Canon! Redacted, he’d just be like… more open to the MC? And it’d be in an academic setting??? Like he developed some self-esteem solutions and got more confident in being himself, still having subtle mannerisms of character traits you enjoyed… but more him
Like… he went to therapy so he could be better for you before you even knew him, cause you said some bullshit like they were no good looking guys in the world who didn’t have therapy, cause there’s nothing hotter than a mentally stable guy. (i mean, you’re all here because you love a stable guy, right… ;] )
But yeah, now you just know him as that snarky ass, dark-haired with pink tips ‘genius’ in your university ‘psychology in modern media’ class.
Warnings and whatnot: lolol NSFW implications so minors DNI, a decent amount of swearing on my part, I'd say?
Another flawless assignment completed for you. Whoo! It was a nice day to be smart!
To be fair, you had pored over that goddamn presentation for hours before going to sleep, so if you hadn’t done well, you probably would’ve bust a pipe over some unlucky guy’s head.
You grinned seeing the big 95 on your paper. You spent so long detailing the moral complications between the character relationships as you gutted the root problems for each of the character flaws and how that showed in their bonds with others.
Unfortunately, you had the (dis)pleasure of being seated to [REDACTED], the class self-proclaimed genius. 
God, you hated him.
You were pretty sure you hated him more because he was so stupidly hot. You could clearly see his chiseled stone abs when he wore those clingy, black compression shirts! And paired with gray fucking sweatpants?
He knew what he was doing… And it was to mess up your game!
I mean, seriously, what was the lecturer doing, seating you next to this second coming of Michelangelo?! It’s almost like she had something personal against you!
(the lecturer was in fact, very for the both of you getting together. You both were smart, maybe you’d find a way to increase [REDACTED]’s grades…)
You never noticed him all that much in the beginning of the year. He brooded in his own corner, never noticed by anyone in those dumb black baggy hoodies.
But the minute he sat next to you, all of a sudden he realized he was hot stuff???
Okay, sure there, bro. He needed to chill out.
All of a sudden, he went from a lonely loser, to some hot genius within like the span of a day.
You didn’t get it.
But to be fair, you didn’t remember telling your good friend Moth how you started having things for hot but smart guys and guys who could actually stand a battle of wits… But that was for [REDACTED] to remember, and you to forget.
He leaned over your shoulder, a lazy smirk gracing his features. “95, not bad, angel.”
Agh! That stupid nickname! It was supposed to be something intimate, something reserved for lovers and such, but he insisted on using it to berate your grades!
He slid his paper over with a big 96 on it. “But not good enough.”
Of course. He had to have known that he was doing an in depth character analysis on the teachers favorite character and played to all the teachers preferences in the character and was spouting self-servient bullshit!
…But his presentation was well done, you had to admit. Normal people wouldn’t notice because you pay an unhealthy amount to any flaws in his looks, but he must’ve studied hard, he had huge eyebags during his presentation…
How would you know it’s because he thought your frustrated face was so cute when you kept thinking of ideas for your presentation that he completely forgot he had to impress the teacher to impress you?
Honestly, [REDACTED] cared more that he was on your mind in any way, even if that was because he acted like a ‘suck-up’ because he was too busy watching you.
“Hope you haven’t forgotten the many times I’ve beaten you academically, [REDACTED]. Or are you losing your memory because you’ve been sitting with a godsend this whole time? Sorry, didn’t mean for my heavenly powers to warp with your memory.” You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms.
“Then, you’re sure living up to your title, angel.” He snorted and went back to looking towards the front before muttering something under his breath. “...But your presentation was good, dork.”
In shock at the compliment, you stood there with your mouth open.
He glanced back over at you, “What? Is it so hard to believe that you did well on our midterm presentation?” he huffed to himself in disbelief before a grin made its way to his face. “Sitting there with your mouth open? It’s like you want someone to kiss that dumb look off your face.”
He thought the comment would shake you out of your stupor, make you come back with a feisty comment.
But no, you sat there, thinking about all the implications of that statement. …What if he kissed you? But he has so many piercings… He has a tongue piercing, snakebites, honestly, your mouth would feel like a jewelry store with the amount of silver in it…
But he looked like a fuckboy, would he be good at kissing?
Wait, hold up, no, no, no. Dude, you gotta remember…
He was a loser up until now.
If that’s the way he’d been his whole life, he’s probably never even kis—
And if that realization wasn’t enough for you to drop your jaw, nothing ever would.
[REDACTED] could only stare at you in mild surprise as your mouth opened… even more. He slowly blinked at you, a mock-scandalized look on his face, “What, you really want someone to kiss you that bad? You volunteering to be kissed, angel?”
You immediately let go all thoughts of kissing that gorgeous jerk in favor of heat rising to your face, “Nope. I’m good.”
He pushed and prodded a little more, “What, you never kissed anyone before?” He actually wasn’t quite sure. The early years when he didn’t know how to hack anything and couldn’t follow you were blank spaces in your life to him.
You muttered a curse under your breath and turned away from him without denying his question.
Although you couldn’t see it, his whole face lit up with hope. Oh, he was going to be your first kiss! He couldn’t wait! He internallly coughed at his eagerness.
He had to court you first before the two of you could become anything.
He looked back at your lecturer who had been picking on students who had to read out full paragraphs of their analysis on a TV Show that followed the messy plot of a coming of age, romance drama.
And also, clearly, leaving the two of you alone. He hushedly whispered to you, “Wait, are you serious, angel?”
You grumbled into the palm of your hand before slowly turning to him, “unfortunately… yes. I haven’t kissed anyone yet. But turns out this university is full of jerks and dumbasses…”
You paused. Well, maybe not all jerks and dumbasses. “Guess there’s a couple guys in the music department that are cool.”
Murder flashed through [REDACTED]’s mind thinking of you asking them out before putting on a strained smile, “So where do I fit in, hm?”
“I dunno…” You hadn’t put too much thought towards [REDACTED]. Sure, he was hot. But he was kind of a prick.
But he did respect your gender identity…
And he never went too far, making sure he didn’t cross any lines or boundaries…
And he gave you that academic rival that you’d been search―
…Oh my god.
He was your academic rival.
You loved rivals to lovers… Was this a sign? You got a hot rival, who respects you, your boundaries, your intellect and he was hot?!
Okay, maybe you had dreamed about him on a couple of weird occasions, but dreams don’t mean anything!
Is what you would say if you were in denial.
Oh dear, did you like him?!
You gave him a quick once over, looking at all the piercings on his ears and face as your eyes trailed to his shirt which clung tightly to his skin, all defined abs and muscles on display.
Hold up! Were those body cutouts on his top around his hips that you saw?! Fuck, those were hot…
Your eyes trailed a little bit lower to his pants… and shit, he was packing… There was no way in hell he was allowed to be that big, in height and in… length.
Ugh, your thoughts made you shudder a little. No way you were thirsting over a guy you were just fighting.
…But it wouldn’t be the first time, that’s for sure…
Okay, so maybe you had not-so-subtly eyed your seatmate like he was a piece of meat.
But he enjoyed the attention! He loved you drinking him up like he was just a pretty thing. But he was your pretty thing… Some random girls keep trying to ask him out, but he doesn’t want them. He wants you. But most importantly, he wants you to want him too.
“What, cat got your tongue, sweetheart?” He teased, using something other than angel as a nickname.
“Wh-Whatever, [REDACTED]. Shut up.” You rolled your eyes and took your attention off of him before whispering something under your breath.
“Angel, you gotta speak up.”
You grimaced, “I guess you go into the alright department. Luckily for you, you’re the only one there. You seem to be the only one I know who’s cool enough to handle me around here.”
He blinked, looking at you in subtle reverence, “A whole department for me, angel? Thank you.” He laced it with an edge of sarcasm but internally, he couldn’t have been more happy. 
He was the only one there that you tolerated! The only one you liked.
You. Chose. Him.
312 notes · View notes
k-slla · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
Before you continue to reading I'm letting you know that in here is a major spoiler for Spn se15.ep20 - you've been warned 🥲
Warnings: all angst this one, show level violence, death
WC: 2,222
I am sorry, but kind of I am not- I've cried a lot writing this and I hope that you will too..🤍
All mistakes are mine!
My Masterlist
Enjoy!
Tumblr media
You sat at the library table, staring at the working voice recorder placed on the table in front of you. You didn’t even know what pushed you to do these recordings. Maybe you wished, deep in your heart, that somehow  some version of Dean from an alternate universe would find them. All that sorrow, grief and pain that you went through from losing a soulmate of your world, should probably have some effect on them, too, right? He wouldn’t be the Dean you’re talking about right now, but he’d know that in some other timeline he was loved, he’s gone and you’re missing him, a lot. You wanted to hope so at least.
Maybe it was just to get those feelings out that were burning your insides like acid. Even if it was the same story told by you every day. Maybe it was just your way to deal with losing him.
Well, whatever the reason was, you had no one you needed to explain yourself to. 
Some days it was just maddening, being all alone in the Bunker. Sam had left a long time ago. He didn't forget Dean, but he definitely moved on. You stayed put, you couldn't take the needed step to move out or to try move on. All connections with Jody and Donna and even Claire slowly died off and there was no one left for you to go to other than the recorder now waiting for you to speak your mind. Perhaps that was just your fate. Who could change that?
Tumblr media
“Hey, Dean, it’s me. Today is..” you sucked in a quick breath. “Today marks the full year that you’ve been gone now.” You continued quietly. November 19th. You couldn’t believe that it’s already been a year without him. “Each day getting closer to today, it has gotten harder for me to climb out of bed in the morning. Every morning when I awoke, I looked beside me in bed and you weren’t there. You haven't been there for a year and I miss you, Dean. I miss you so much.” You thought you had already shed all your tears, but no - they still kept pouring every morning, day and night. 
“And I miss Sam, too. I know that I’ve probably said it a million times before, but…Well, Sam moved out of the Bunker not long after we gave you..” Following words scraped your throat like thorns. “..the burial. And I completely understand that. He didn’t want to stay here anymore. I can’t blame him. I couldn’t leave and now it’s just lonely here. He begged that I’d let him take Miracle with him. I know how much you loved that pup. I miss him, too. But believe it or not, Sam left me the Baby for now. I did tell him that this was your legacy, your father's legacy and he agreed that when the day comes, Baby would be left to his eldest.” You smiled through tears that were silently running down your cheeks, thinking of Sam someday having kids. 
Something that Dean never got to enjoy for his own. Talking about everything over and over again eased you in some way. Even if it was for the day.
“I still have a hard time thinking about that night. Nightmares even. That was supposed to be your last hunt. We were almost out. And…And it was your last hunt.” 
Tumblr media
You and Dean did have dreams. Big dreams for your future without Chuck, monsters and hunting. You never told anyone, but you and Dean were very close to trying to start a family. 
You definitely had hoped for a little Mini-Dean. Both of you were so excited, when you had all your late night pillow talks about family and kids, thinking about names even. He would've been an amazing father, you were absolutely certain of that.
“What am I supposed to do now?” Your voice broke. You figured that if it wasn't for you talking to this recorder on a daily basis, you'd probably go mute. You and Sam texted, very infrequently, once a month or so. He gave a promise to Dean, to look out for you, but it wasn't his fault that you were the one drawing back from him. Even with a text a month, you still felt like you were hanging over him like some shadow from his past, clawed to his back, keeping him from moving on. And you didn't want that, so you’d rather not speak at all. 
“What am I supposed to do?” You repeated with a whisper. You still hunted sometimes, if you had the energy for that or if it happened to be close to you. But it was a rare sight. You did some odd jobs, just to have some money for food to keep you going. But you didn't need much. Meal a day was enough to sustain you after all the hard work of sitting at the library or sleeping. 
Honestly you felt like you were fading away staying in the Bunker. But also there was nowhere for you to go.
“We were so close. So close, Dean, to get to our dream…and still…” You couldn't stop the tears that were now free falling. Memories of that night forced themselves into your consciousness. 
Tumblr media
A simple routine vampire hunt. You had to admit, you were a little bit nervous, but still, there were the three of you together, so you knew the chances of anything happening were slim. But there were more vamps than you all had expected and it turned out to be a struggle. You were all battling for your lives there. Everything happened so quickly. One second Dean was fighting with one of them, the next moment he was across the room, pinned against the post.
Sam quickly took care of the vamp who had attacked Dean, while you fought with one on your own. Sam came to help you out, and when you took a look around, you saw all the headless bodies laying around. Neither of you didn't even realize at first that Dean hadn't moved after the attack, not before he called out to you. “ Y/N, I- I can't..” 
Sam reacted first and ran to him. “Hey! Hey, hey, don't move, Dean. We'll get help for you. It'll be okay.” Dean took a few quick breaths in. “No, Sammy. It's…I think it's pierced.. right through.” He looked at his stomach and your eyes followed, and you saw a tip of a metal spike coming through.
“Dean! No, no, no…please no! Sammy, help him!” You yelled hoarsely, while your hands traveled all over Dean's body, trying to find the best way to get him off there.
“No, Y/N, sweetie. No.” Dean remained calm when he looked at you. “You can't move me. I'm sorry. I don't think I have long left…” He spoke quietly, a few tears running down his cheeks. You stood in front of him, barely able to stay up as he brought up his hand to your cheek. 
“I love both of you. So much.” His eyes shifted between you and Sam. “Please..Y/N, can I - can I talk with Sam for a second?” You nodded and shut your eyes tightly, fighting tears. “Of course, honey.” You let go of him and walked a little bit further to give them a moment. 
You sat down on the ground and looked at the brothers, who were now saying their goodbyes to each other. This wasn't how the hunt was supposed to end. This wasn't how everything was supposed to end. It was too soon. Just a simple vampire hunt had turned so quickly into this nightmare. 
With his last strength Dean was holding onto Sam's shirt. “You’ll have to look out for her, Sammy. For me. She'll need you out there..” You heard Dean say quietly. “And-” Dean's voice had started to quiver. “I love you so much, my baby brother. I-I need you to tell me…” he took a deep breath to steady his voice and looked Sam straight in the eyes. “I need you to tell me that it's okay. I need to hear that from you, Sammy.” Both of them had tears silently streaming down their faces. “I’ll look after her, Dean. I promise..” You knew how much it hurt for Sam to say the following. “And it's okay, Dean..It will be okay.” he tried to smile through his tears. 
You saw how Dean looked at Sam. His baby brother, he’d taken care of almost all their lives. They've had all their fights over the years, differences on what's right or wrong, or how to save the world, but ultimately all that what was now left there, was love. The same, unconditional love that they've had for each other from day one.
Dean let go of Sam and looked at you on the ground. You knew what was coming and you were not ready for that. “Y/N, please..come here..” he was out of breath just a little. “Dean, no..” you were bawling and protesting against saying goodbye to him even though you still dragged yourself up and to him. 
“I'll be outside for just a second.” Sam moved a few steps back, to give you two a moment alone. You held onto Dean's shirt, keeping yourself from collapsing. You were shaking all over your body from the shock. Even now, standing face to face with him, you couldn’t look Dean in the eyes. “Baby, please look at me.” You shook your head and sobbed loudly, fingers clinging tighter onto his shirt. “I can’t, Dean!” 
Dean reached for your cheek, holding it softly and whispering. “I need you to…I need to see you..” You took a shuddering breath and finally gathered strength to look at him. You didn’t want to think of what’s going to happen tomorrow. All you could do for now, was to cherish the time you had with him. Even if it ends way too soon, you had to be happy with the time you had together. Not every hunter is as lucky as you and Dean were. You had to take everything from that moment that you had to say goodbye to Dean. 
For a little while, both of you stared at each other without saying a word. In his eyes you saw acceptance of what’s to come. He had already made peace with his fate. Now there was only left for you to do the same.
“You are beautiful, Y/N.” he smiled weakly. “I’m sorry..for leaving you, but I know you..” He closed his eyes for a second to take a deep breath to keep going. “I know you’ll be alright, but baby, you have to stop hunting..please promise me, Y/N, that you’ll get out.”
“Dean, I can’t…not alone..”
“Yes, you can.” His hand faintly squeezed yours that was still locked in his shirt.
You moved closer to Dean to rest your forehead against his. “Well...I don’t want to.” you sniffled.
“You have to, sweetheart…Tell me..it’s okay..you have to tell me it’s okay..for me to go.” he spoke fast but the words were quietly fading on his lips. This was it. 
You turned your head towards the door. “Sammy!” Turning back to Dean, you kissed him for the last time. “It’s okay, Dean, you can..you can let go..I love you.” Very faint smile appeared on Dean’s face as he saw Sam beside you again. 
“No bringing me back this time, Sam.” He wheezed out. “We’ll see each other again soon enough.” You rested your head on his shoulder and felt his whole body slowly starting to relax. Dean leaned into you and with his final breath, he quietly whispered into your ear. “I love you, Y/N.” 
From the corner of your eye you saw Sam break down on the floor. He sat there for a minute while you still held onto Dean. A moment later, Sam got up and pulled you into his strong embrace when you were still struggling to breathe. “We- we got work to do.” You sniffled and let go of Sam, sudden numbness taking over you. 
Tumblr media
You didn't know how long you were sitting there, thinking about his last moments. You had no idea what time it was. Day or night, it started to feel all the same to you. 
Your brain had blocked out mostly everything after the goodbye. You knew you helped Sam with Dean and the pyre, but there were no emotions there. You were numb. Your moves were robotic. Both you and Sam stood by Dean as long as the fire was out. He wanted to get you away from that but you refused to leave. All you could think of while you were standing there, was that there was no one, nor will there be anyone you'll love more than Dean. 
“I love you, Dean. I'll speak to you tomorrow.” You whispered your last goodbye for the day before you turned off the recorder. Every day has become the same to you. You knew that one day you'll see him again and that was all that kept you going. Knowing that Dean was still waiting for you was all you needed to move forward.
Taglist: @jackles010378 @cevansbaby-dove @alternativeprincess94 @deanwinchestersgirl87 @il0vebeingdelulu
55 notes · View notes
mafiasliege · 18 days
Text
I dare you to let me go
(this is part 4 of my fic! Enjoy reading!)
Part 3 ↓
JAMESON
October is the best time Jamie had been to Scotland. Over the years, he'd visited vantage many times. It was built on a coastal cliff not too far from a lovely cove. The pleasant sunny days right before winter starts were the best. The beaches were perfectly warm and cliff-jumping into the water was a wonderful activity. At least, those are the inputs the Viscount Branford offered, except the cliff-jumping part, that was all Jameson. Branford had actually advised against it, which Jameson did not heed to, of course.
His relationship with his father may be tragically non-existent now, but his uncle made up for some of it. He'd never admit it, but he would have loved having him in his life growing up.
He'd landed in Scotland two days ago. And on the third, he'd started feeling lonely on his own and decided to dial up a redheaded Viscount who happened to be in Scotland too.
"You outdid yourself today" Jameson said, draining the last of the scotch and gesturing two fingers at the bartender.
"I did. And it looks like you can outdrink me. Tell me, was that your way of indirectly congratulating me for absolutely trouncing you at motocross?"
"In my defence, I may have underestimated you."
"And why is that?" Jameson's uncle raised a brow that reminded him too much of Grayson.
They must be worried, he thought, and then,
Stop it.
"Because you're an old man" he shrugged, to which they both ended up laughing. The drinks might be to blame, too.
7 seconds of silence died when Simon asked, "Why are you here, nephew? Surely it's not only to spend time with "an old man," as you put it."
To that, Jameson said nothing. Until a word stole his attention.
"You show up completely unannounced, and without your beloved heiress in tow, which makes me think there was a squabble, perhaps?"
"It's none of your business" he retorted with controlled fury.
"And yet I am here."
Maybe it was, in fact, the drinks, but Jameson told him everything. His uncle listened patiently. He didn't offer Jameson any advice, and at the moment, that was exactly what he needed.
After Jameson was done talking now than he probably ever did in his life, simon spoke, "are you staying at Vantage tonight as well?"
-------------------------------------------------
Jameson made it back to Vantage sometime around sunset. He always noticed, it looked so beautiful from the castle towers, or the cove. He'd considered proposing to Avery there, but then things had turned out the way they were now. He had left in such a hurry, he wasn't even sure he'd taken the ring with him, or at least hidden it away.
He couldn't hide anything from Avery, if he tried. That wasn't the problem now, though.
Now she just didn't care enough to look.
He parked the convertible in the garage built in the massive yard in front of the castle, alongside several other vintage cars that were too beautiful to be real. He discovered his affinity for vintage cars at an auction, where one of the items open for bidding was the 1962 Corvette Stingray he drove just minutes ago. The garage was huge, and a newer addition. It became a necessity because of the random thunderstorms he'd witnessed there. It was by the seaside, after all. The weather changed by the hour.
"Jameson?"
He could recognise that voice anywhere.
No. That can't be right.
He turned around to see a blur of brown hair and a worried face, and before he knew it, he was enveloped in a hug.
"You're okay" she said, much like she was trying to reassure herself. It felt nice to be hugged by her, but it was overtaken by the feeling that it took him flying off to another country for her to hug him spontaneously. So he pulled away.
He could get a good look at her now. She looked like hell. Disheveled hair, like she'd been running her fingers through it. Movements of her body that screamed exhausted. Puffy eyes from lack of sleep.
Or crying.
Jameson had seen and lived every kind of hell there is, but Avery crying made his heart break a little more every time, even when he thought it was already broken. By her, no less.
Don't fall for it. Resist it.
"Why are you here?"
"You suddenly disappear out of nowhere, you inform no one, fly off to god-knows-where on your plane you told no one you had. I was worried as hell" she fell a little short on breath, which made that last part sound even more distressed than it was. Her voice was rough too, like she had a cold. Or as if she'd been shouting.
His breath stuck at a mental image of a panicked Avery wandering around looking for him. It was so contrary to the distant, disinterested woman he'd sadly gotten used to.
If only she cared so much before.
"When did you come home?" He retorted, pushing away his thoughts, and a crumbling desire to comfort her.
"Jameson-"
"When?" He repeated.
Avery swallowed, "Eleven." He scoffed. Of course she showed up 4 hours after she was supposed to. Again. "I'm sorry, okay? I really am. I got held up by the-"
"See, that's the thing. There's always somewhere that need visiting or something that needs fixing or someone that needs saving. And you've put it above me, above us, every single time."
She seemed taken aback, and a little pale.
"Everything at both the foundations depends on me, Jameson, everything."
"So did I. But not anymore."
Avery looked even more pale now. And scared, more scared than she looked the many times people had tried to kill her. He felt a slight pang of guilt, looking at her scared expression.
You have nothing to feel guilty about.
"What is that supposed to mean?" She whispered, a tear rolling down her cheek. He pushed back the urge to wipe it away. He hated being the reason of her tears, even though she'd been the reason for so many of his. He sucked in a long breath.
"It means we can't be together anymore."
38 notes · View notes
britcision · 4 months
Text
In honour of a combo Wednesday and then post-midnight Yule, have a WIP Wednesday friends! We haven’t seen Sam for a while and Hanukkah was early this year (finished on the 15) but we are here now!
This chapter’s already gotten intense as hell for Danny and Jason with Lady Gotham but we’ve been tragically without our resident fashionable goth (sorry not sorry Bruce) and we are definitely still a muppet movie, so enjoy Sam-Miss-Piggy creating some extra chaos behind the scenes 👀
No promises about how regular these updates will be because again, plot chapter, I like letting those drop without spoiling the reveals too much, but we shall see
——————
Chapter 18 part i So That Just Happened
Back in her own room on the other side of the country from Gotham, Sam Manson reclined back into giant, coffin shaped body pillow her beloved girlfriend had given her when they moved and contemplated her phone.
The brand new Wayne-chat was blowing up satisfactorily, although apparently Tim was a massive stalker too. That was probably a good thing; it meant she hadn’t actually nuked Tuck’s chances with his nerd-crush. Now they could bond over their mutual stalker tendencies.
But, did that make her revenge less effective?
It wasn’t like she was actually out to ruin his life, but she’d kinda like to leave a mark. Something that would make him think twice about letting her think he and Danny had fucking died in Gotham in her absence.
Or. Well. Gone radio silent in Gotham, which was probably actually worse because if they were dead she’d know exactly where they were.
The Wayne chat were all pretty sure Tim and Tucker were together too, and Sam’s new best friend Babs had even pulled up the feed from their living room tv somehow. Sam wasn’t exactly the tech wizard Tucker was, but… after seeing that, she disconnected her and Val’s TV from the wifi.
And settled in to remote watch Tuck get his ass kicked at Spiderheck, apparently. At least for a little while; until something else on her phone caught her attention.
It was… almost funny. While she knew she was a whole two timezones away, she’d never really felt left out before. Like maybe she should have stayed on the east coast…
Not that she regretted it, of course. She had a good job, a good school, a wonderful girlfriend who’d been so excited to get into a good school and really go to town on the business department.
(Apparently there were posters of Val’s face in the ethics classrooms. Sam refused to ask if they were golden example or dire warning.)
She was just… a long way away. Even a long portal away, and… being back with the guys, even in Gotham, made the quiet of their comfy little apartment seem lonely.
Huffing, she turned and traced her fingers through the leaves of her mimosa plant on the windowsill beside the bed. They curled gently shut at her touch, and made her smile. Just like always.
She was happy to be home. She wasn’t technically liminal enough yet that it was her haunt, but… well, for all the jokes Val made, Sam had to admit she’d put down roots. She loved her job at the greenhouses, and her internship at the botanical gardens.
She loved scaring the hell out of the dudebros in Val’s business classes who thought ethics were a waste of time. She loved sharing messages with Jazz about the boys, laughing that even three hours ahead, Tuck and Danny still couldn’t get up before them.
She was kinda considering texting Harley about Timblr too. Not like, for any particular reason; if Tim’s family weren’t gonna embarrass Tucker enough, Harley probably wouldn’t either. She’d probably think it was adorable.
Or, y’know, worrying evidence of obsession. Psych types worried about stuff like that, usually.
Sam was kinda also considering sending Harley Jazz’s number. Jazz might still be skating just on the neurosurgery side of the line, but she’d always been big into psychology. Big enough to try and double major, and only drop to major-minor after the third pre-exam meltdown.
And she could use having someone else do the shrink bit on her a little more often. Although really, for that Sam should make her a professional appointment; friends didn’t ask friends to psychoanalyze their overprotective pseudo-sisters. And Jazz could use more friends.
Jazz could use a transfer to a specialty that would let her sleep once in a while, a more stable supply of fresh ecto, and about six weeks in a meditation retreat to get the accidental telepathy under control, but more friends would be good too. And less stubborn insistence on her second try for double majors.
Maybe the switch to psychiatry full time would be good for her? Or psychology. Sam was a little fuzzy on the difference, which one Jazz was minoring in, and which one Harley did.
(Jazz’s current second major was neurosurgery, which Jazz insisted was totally less taxing alongside a neurology major because it was the same body part. She was the only person in her class attempting the double major though, so.)
Humming tunelessly to herself, Sam flicked back into the group chat. Babs was still sharing the feed… brows drawing in, Sam frowned at the little spider figures still fighting to the death. Now, she wasn’t as big of a gamer as she used to be, but she was pretty sure Spiderheck didn’t actually offer red berets.
Snorting a laugh, she flicked back out of the chat and opened a new one, adding both Jazz and Harley. All it needed was the perfect name… something that would grab both of their attention.
Obvious. Child’s play.
Snuggling back into her coffin pillow, Sam grinned down at her phone screen.
Danny Has A Boyfriend chat was live.
——————
And in at the last minute, Jazz! We’ll see if she shows up in person this chapter, I’m hoping it’ll be the last big lore dump before the first plot arc begins but We Shall See…
Chapter 20 is right around the corner though, and I like my divisibles of 5 so I miiiiight shoot for that Red Hood Reveal then… 👀
Tag List: @welcometosasakiworld @someonebored0100 @stealingyourbones @starkcravingmad @frostedthroughghost @akikkobara @rainbowbunny0159 @littlefeather345 @violet-catsarelife @serasvictoria02 @wolfjackle @blacksea21090 @secretdestinywerewolf @anime-hipster-the-amazing @undead-essence @skitscratched @blackroserelina @snoodly-boop @mayoota-blog @xysidhe @little-apricot-the-writer @chaoticmistake @the-legal-shipper @bun-fish @aroranorth-west @demon-cat-goes-woof @perfectwastelandcreation @onyxlightdragon @larks-and-katydids @peachesandcreamfemboy @jesus-camp-the-sequel @may-rbi @mothman-the-mothman87 @viyatrix @stargirl1331 @thedepressedrobin @skulld3mort-1fan @rootsmudge @ravenshadow17 @cankoking @phantom-dc @mentalcarebear @magic-pincushion @redamancyardor @lyra689 @itsparadoxlacuna @alcorbearson @asphyxia778 @why-must-i-be-like-this @tkiesai @greenpyrowolf @frivolous-pastel @honeysuckletook @adorkable1291
54 notes · View notes
redbootsindoriath · 11 months
Text
Okay so I, like most Silmarillion fanartists, draw the Fëanorian twins as looking like...well...kids.  The book says they were the youngest in the family, and we all went, “Okay then they’re children.”  Which...yeah, that’s fair.  They really just seem to be chilling most of the time, which makes them seem a bit more innocent than the others.  But rather early on in my time doing Silm fanart, I thought about how funny if would be if they looked way older than their brothers.  But I never did anything with the idea.
Well, after finishing the Fëanorian Week drawings this year I was thinking about how I don’t really draw many Ñoldor due to not having headcanons about many of them.  And you guys know by this time that I love a bit of good angst, so I looked at the twins and said, “...ooh goody” and gave them a big old revamp.  (The drawing is of Amras and Maedhros, by the way.  For one thing, I’ve said before that I don’t like drawing identical twins. And for another…we’ll get into that in a second.)
Tumblr media
Real quick, for those who aren’t super familiar with the different pieces of source material we have from Tolkien: in the Silmarillion both twins survive most of the story until they die together in the same battle near the end of the book. However, in one lone version of the story, Amrod dies when the ships are burned at Losgar.  Okay so.  That’s what’s been published, from here on out it’s just headcanon territory.
I think Amrod did die when the ships were burned.  Elves are spiritually a bit...different...so I expect twins have a particularly strong bond.  Amras wasn’t really able to handle the death of his brother, and went a little bit weird in the head.  He believed that half of his own soul died at Losgar, and half of Amrod’s still lived inside of him.  For the rest of his life, he answered to Amrod’s names, his own names, and Ambarussa, and signed his name and managed accounts as any of them as well.  He refused to acknowledge Amrod’s death and became irrational when any of his brothers mentioned it, so eventually they played along.  The story spreads that there were two of Fëanor’s sons that guard East Beleriand, but they are unsocial and rarely seen together.  People will report having seen one or the other of them but no one can tell the difference (in reality, this is because there is only one that is still alive.)
It’s uncertain who all knows about Amrod’s death, even among the Ñoldor that came with Fingolfin.  Most of the Sindar and Silvan elves don’t know.  Probably no humans know.  Anyone who does know doesn’t talk about it, and all everybody else knows is what they're told, and this is why in most versions of the story they both survive until Sirion.  For a while you’d see one or the other of them out hunting or going to war, and you just assumed the other was doing something else.  But then after Sirion no one ever saw either one.  Therefore, they obviously both died in the same battle.
Anyway, that’s just the version I came up with.  I don’t know if I’ll keep it, but it makes Amras a much more interesting character.  And that let me come up with a more visually interesting design, much older than I used to draw them.  Whether this was always the way they looked or a change that Amras went through after arriving in Middle Earth I haven’t decided yet.
176 notes · View notes
vivalarevolution · 2 years
Text
𝓜𝔂 𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻'𝓼 𝓚𝓮𝓮𝓹𝓮𝓻
Tumblr media
Aegon Targaryen x Sister Targaryen Oc  
Summary: Rhaenerys loved her siblings, especially her brother, whom she was willing to steal from under green's nose to keep him safe.
A/N: It’s not my best work but I hope you all gonna like it nonetheless.
English is not my native language. Sorry for any mistakes.
Part 2
Tumblr media
Rhaenerys was Rhaenyra's younger sister. Born a year later, she was nothing that her father had imagined. Until now, she remembered his words.
-The maester said it was a son, he had to be. How he kicked, how energetic and strong he was- Viserys had repeated through most of her childhood years.
The woman tried to ignore how much his words affected her, but eventually she began to live with them, transforming them into her strength. She was stubborn, temperamental, and clever, winning her place among the royal court , but her heart remained the same. Kind and loving to those who she loved.
Her older sister and she were inseparable. They were a rock and peace for each other. When their mother died, when their dear friend married their father, or when the world forgot about them the moment their younger siblings were conceived into the world. They clung to each other as if they were eachother last bit of hope.
Only then did Viserys begin to notice his second daughter. He began to notice her dedication, her kind soul and hardened spirit. He tried to be supportive as Rhaenerys stared blankly at the wall after hearing the news that she would never be able to have children of her own, tried to treat her as equal to the older Targeryen, unconsciously loving her more than ever before.
The princess did not show it, for her subjects she was a tough and self-confident woman, but inside she felt defeated, lonely.
Many men followed her with their eyes, not hiding their lust, but she stubbornly pushed them away, knowing that she would not give them what the lords wanted most - an extension of their legacy.
However, there were also those whom she let into her bed. Ser Criston or Harwin Strong were the ones her heart cried out to, but the white-haired woman ignored her feelings each time, eventually pushing them away to watch her sister take them into her chambers.
Over the years, she had finally accepted punishment from the gods.
She had no choice but to start living with it, because the curse had no intention of disappearing from her life anyway, so Rhaenerys turned her bitterness into love for her family, which grew drastically quickly, bringing with it equally drastic changes.
Her younger siblings spoke to her very often, and despite Rhaenyra's silent objections, she had nothing to say, watching the love she once received passes to her younger siblings.
Ageon probably loved her the most. She was the first person that did not instill in him the obligation to reign, or didn't beat him when he did something inappropriate. As it used to be for her older sister, the violet-eyed princess became a peaceful haven for the boy.
He often dreamed of her as his mother or lover. She was all he needed, making him a better and more decent man.
But when she disappeared for six years, hiding in Dragonstone with the king's eldest daughter, her uncle and their children, the white-haired man began to return to what his mother's upbringing had created, to the drunkard who slept with another woman every night.
When she found out about it, she wasn’t furious but disappointed and she didn’t even knew in who more, herself or the fair-haired prince.
Tumblr media
Sitting on the great bed, in the royal chambers, the silver-haired girl tried not to cry. Seeing her dying father was hard for her. Rhaenerys was convinced that Viserys had become a living corpse, and his great suffering was evident in his uncover eye.
Holding him by the hand, he told him about what was happening on Dragonstone, staying longer in his presence than Daemon and Rhaenyra, who left her alone with her parent for a moment.
She felt as if everything was starting to fall apart, and the sight of her brother only confirmed it.
Entering his room, she found a real mess. The smell of alcohol wafted through the air, and the prince himself lay on the creased sheets, snoring. The white-haired woman approached him, looking at his body from above, unconsciously combing his silver strands, as she used to do when he was still a child.
Aegon muttered under his breath as he tucked his face into the pillow, fearing that Alicent had decided to pay him a visit again.
-Aegon - the woman said, her velvety voice immediately recognized by the young man.
Frowning in consternation, he opened his eyes to see the Trageryen in front of him who had haunted his dreams too many times.
-Rhaenerys?- he asked in a hoarse voice, trying to force himself to awake.
-I came back - she informed him, walking away from the prince's bed, when he decided to get up.
Violet-eyed man grinned, hugging her tightly. Snuggling against her body, he hid his head in the crease of her neck, inhaling the familiar and soothing scent that surrounded the princess.
-I missed you - he confessed, overjoyed at the presence of his beloved sister, but she did not answer -What's the matter?- he asked confused, looking at her purple irises- Why are you looking at me like that? Rhaenerys please don't look at me like that- he whispered, seeing the same emotions that the queen often looked at him with.
-What happened to you?- she asked, touching his cheek, which was slightly flushed.
-You weren't here. You left me, and my mother still demands more of me. I can't handle it, you left me alone -he complained.
-Will you drink yourself to death with a prostitute by your side every time I leave you alone? - asked the daughter of the king - Aegon, I will not be with you all my life - the white-haired girl replied, catching his face in her hands to look him straight in the eyes.
-I'm sorry -he said, and the first tears began to run down his face.- I'll stop, just don't leave me, please- he croaked, falling into her arms.
Rhaenerys wrapped her arms around him tightly, kissing his temple, she stroked his head with her free hand, motherly rocking him from side to side to soothe his brother, if only slightly. 
-Now, now - she whispered soothingly -There are things that need to be taken care of, Aegon, then I'm all yours - she added, and her younger brother squeezed her body tighter in an act of silent objection, but the silver-haired woman knew that no matter how much he would not like it ,the young man will agree to anything, as long as she will be around him.
Staring at the wall opposite them, she struggled with her thoughts. She felt as if she were faced with a choice between her sister and her brother, whom she loved too much to gain one at the expense of the other.
And oh, how quickly and unexpectedly she was told to make that choice.
Tumblr media
As she ran through Kings Landing, the woman was desperately searching for the white-haired man.
The king is dead. This words still echoed in her head like bells, pounding in her ears.
She stayed in the capital because of her younger siblings, only to become a prisoner of the castle the next day.
She and Rhaenys were furious and deaf at Alicent's offer to convince them to join her and her son. And when an opportunity arose in the form of a gap created by a white worm, they both fled out of the Red Keep, hidden behind wide hoods , hiding in the large group of people.
-Wait- said the princess.
-We don't have time for this Rhaenerys - the old woman said.
-I know about it -purple-eyed replied immediately- But Aegon is not in the castle, I have to find him.
-What for? He is to become a king, and this will create a conflict that can not be avoided anymore - said the white-haired woman- This may be the cause of your death, do not be stupid.
-Free the dragons, free Aegarax and Sunfyre - she ordered firmly, ignoring her words. -Trust me -Rhaenyra's sister said, grabbing her hands.
The late king's cousin merely nodded before moving forward, straight to Dragonpit, when she walked in the opposite direction, begging the gods to be on her side. Capturing Ageon was the best and most risky solution. The prince was the last pawn needed to start a civil war, and Rhaenerys intended to take him away and hide him away from the queen.
Holding the paper in her hand, she looked at it uncertainly.
According to the written message, her brother hid in a temple in the city center, so she, having nothing to lose, trusted a stranger who, to her surprise, left many clues for her.
When she was not far away, one of the prostitutes showed her the direction and the side entrance, as if knowing what the woman had came for.
The white-haired princess entered the stone building. Taking off her cloak, she began her search in a seemingly deserted temple.
-Ageon - said the princess - It's me Rhaenerys. We have to get out of here as soon as possible, we don't have much time.
As if on command, the violet-eyed man left the stone altar, looking uncertainly at his sister, who, seeing him, ran up to him quickly.
-White worm said he would take me to the ship- he informed her -I will disappear from here and Rhaenyra will become queen.
The woman frowned in concern. There was nothing in her letter about the boat or the disappearance. Suddenly, a soft growl fell from her lips, and her eyes darkened with anger.
The white worm probably made the game, and the prince was the grand prize. The one who gave more won him and the rest of the seekers.
-I don't trust him - Rhaenerys said -Aegon, you will come with me. We will fly to Dragonstone. Do you understand? -she asked, taking his hand.
-But our sister, she will kill me- he said- Let's just run away together somewhere, far away- added the fair-haired man.
-Nothing will happen to you - assured the young woman - She never wanted to kill you, your mother inculcated it into your head, if your coronation happens, the war breaks out Aegon and many heads will fall from many necks.
The young man, still scared, nodded understanding as he let his siblings lead him forward. The princess thought she had time, but the sight of unfamiliar men heading towards the temple had led her out of her misconception .
The siblings hid behind one of the massive pillars. The woman pulled a dagger from under her coat, grasping it firmly in her hand, while the other held her brother's hand.
Stepping slowly, she guided her and the prince's movements next to her. The two twins looked around for Aegon, and when they had gone far enough, they took the opportunity by sneaking to the door.
-Quick - Targaryen whispered, looking from side to side.
-Princess- a male voice called her. Rhaenerys stopped. Hiding the violet-eyed man behind her, she was looking confidently at Ser Criston's dark irises, accompanied by Aemond -Prince, your mother looking for you -he added, shifting his gaze to the man behind her.
-He's not going anywhere - she threatened, gripping the blade tighter.
Suddenly, the twins came out from behind their backs.
The white-haired girl looked away from one place to another. After a moment she closed her eyes, trying to calm her breathing.
Dragons can tell when their bonded riders need them.
Suddenly a loud roar spread around, and a shadow covered the square on which they were located.
Dragons are not foolish creatures.
Aegarax descended from the stone structure, landing next to Rhaenerys and Aegon, carefully watching the people in front of him with his eyes.
They can tell the difference between friend and foe.
Opening his mouth, he let out a loud scream again, and then a fire appeared in the back of his throat. The white-haired woman took the opportunity to drag the would-be king to her reptile, quickly climbing his back together with the young man.
-Sōvēs! (Fly) - the blonde said loudly, and the animal rose heavily, destroying parts of some buildings around them.
The black beast soared above the ground as it flew through the city.
The rider looked back, the King's Landing receded farther and farther away, to become only a blur. As two more roars spread through the air, she breathed a sigh of relief. Rhaenys wth her dragon and Sunfyre flew near them.
The women looked at each other and nodded their heads in silent understanding. The white-haired girl closed her eyes, feeling the adrenaline leaving her body.
Aegon grabbed her hand, squeezing it as tightly as they had been a few moments ago when they were on the ground, then he kissed her cheek, hiding his face in her neck.
-Thank you- he whispered, but she heard him anyway.
Rhaenerys joined their hands together in response, nestling against his torso. They were safe...for now.
734 notes · View notes