I came back to my house in Tokyo because I'll packing up for a move.
while I was at it, I wandered around at Shinjuku 2-chome which is famous area as gaytown.
but this town put an emphasis on commercial, it isn't working as community that exists in daily life and it can't be safe space.
walking in Japan, I didn't used to see rainbow flag is raise at shop, also I could only see one even this gaytown, that's why one of the reasons I've been longing for overseas.
わたしがクィア表象がどれだけ重要かということ、そして特にaroの人々の表象がもっと増えるべきだと気づいたのは、主人公がaroaceのYA小説、Alice OsemanのLovelessを読んでから、そして映画の若草物語(2019)を見てジョーをaromanticのアイコンだと思ってからだ(ちなみにこのジョーのクィアリーディングはSounds Fake But Okayというずっと聴いているポッドキャストで熱く語っているのを聞いてそう思った)。最近では二次創作の力も感じることが多くある。そしてこの本を読んで、自分の好きなジャンルで、恋愛至上主義に対抗することを明言している作者が書いていて、自分が読んで育ってきた本たちと同じ言語(わたしにとっては日本語)で書いてあって、自分みたいな体験や感情をその中に見出せる作品に出会うことの意味がさらに深くわかったように思う。セクシュアリティをポイントとして本を読むときにこんな体験ができる作品がこの世に溢れている人が前よりさらに羨ましい(所謂(男女の)ラブロマンスって共感して読む人がいるものなのかずっと疑問に思っているけど、これを考え始めるのはわたしにとってふりだしに戻るみたいなことかもしれない)。
“Pride” has been seen as “joy” or “celebration” for most people. So maybe I must talk expectedly about those. However I want to talk from the weakness of myself. I can’t avoid it to tell my truth. The joy and pain always lives together inside me. If I just hide the one side, it’s same as telling a lie. I’m not sure how honest I can be, still I’ll try my best.
When I used the word “pride” in general, I think I used as “arrogance”, “vanity”, or any similar meanings. It was unacceptable for me to say in a positive way, because I thought it was inappropriate to show it. The society where I came believes in hiding their emotions. I was one of it. Even if it was about queer’s “pride”, I couldn’t find myself there. First, I thought I was heterosexual/romantic until resent. Second, most images of “pride” were telling “love”. But this “love” was not about a person who is aromantic or asexual. It was full with romance and sex.
Self-hate made more difficult to receive it. I can’t say I’m proud of myself. I know I have toxic, violent, apathetic feeling in me and I had acted like that to many people. Sometimes it was words. Sometimes it was physical. Sometimes it was avoidance. And the worst thing is, I sometimes felt pleasure and didn’t doubt about it. This was based on my self-unconfidence and my fear. Being alone had been contemplated as tragedy and worthless about my life. Since this,I tried to hide my ugliness from everyone, from me. So I continued it. It was a spiral. When I realized what I have done, it was too late. My shape inside me had became hideous. I made it that way. How can I use “pride” when I’m like that?
I knew the word “aromantic” for a long time, but I hadn’t thought that I was one of them. Even I started to consider it, I couldn’t believe myself and my answer because of the unconfidence. So I decided to find it from others. I try to meet other asexual/aromantic and queer people in London. Initially, I couldn’t speak to anyone, but I communicated with them little by little. They didn’t have an actual answer. However, talking with them let me feel the connection to the world. They were not my friends or family, but they shared many emotions and thoughts so I shared mines too. That healed me deeply. Everyone had a different journey and it illuminated my pieces of life unexpectedly. I found my pain I did’t notice, my loneliness in my life, my messy feelings, and my joy inside me. Those pieces had made me to discover myself.
I had realized that I was giving up to find connection to someone in my life. And I also found out that I always wanted connection. I thought I had no problem in me but I wasn’t. For a long time I believed I need punishment to destroy myself so I could stop the spiral, but what I really needed to do was accepting myself so I can face the truth and live in this world. No one told me how to do that. If I knew it, I could’ve found more joy in my life.
When you search the meaning of ”pride” in dictionary, they’ll show this:
1. a feeling of pleasure and satisfaction that you get because you or people connected with you have done or got something good
2. your feeling of your own worth and respect for yourself
There is still suffers in my daily life, and it’s even more painful than before. But I know I have “pride” inside me. If I could tell about it, considering all of these meanings, I will answer to be myself including my weakness. The certitude of my sexuality is not important. I want to face and carry my every sin and my wound to be myself. And because of my “pride”, I need to resist what’s happening in my world. They are telling lies and wrong ways to connect with someone. I don’t want anyone to get in the spiral like me. That’s the way to respect myself. Maybe I’m not strong enough, but I know I can. Because I know my “pride” always lights and leads my journey of my life.
性別が、ない!インターセックス漫画家のクィアな日々 | NO GENDER! THE QUEER LIFE OF AN INTERSEX MANGA ARTIST (2018)
dir. Shôgo Watanabe
Up to the age 30, Sho Arai lived as a woman, but was found to be intersex after chromosome testing. Sho now lives as neither man nor woman, and creates essay manga based on the changes their body has undergone. Sho has been dispatching messages on how to live to young readers who are also struggling with their gender identity. Sho lives with their assistant, Koh, a young gay man who they met 10 years ago at a vocational school where they teaches manga. Koh has himself debuted as a manga artist and come out publicly. When Sho reveals the inner state of their mind on camera, their relationship moves in an unexpected direction.
(link in title)
rinasonline: This one is dedicated to all my queer gyaru babes ! This Hell gyarupi remix ft. @minachanxx is out nowww ✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻
うちらのクィアぎゃるべびちゃんたちに向けた曲だよー!!! @minachanxx と作ったThis Hellのギャルピremixきいてねー♡
Published by Steve Lawrence and edited with Peter Hujar and Andrew Ullrick, Newspaper was published in New York City between 1968 and 1971.
Newspaper was a wordless, picture-only periodical thatran for fourteen issues and featured the disparate practices of over forty artists. With an editorial focus on placing appropriated material alongside new works, the periodical sought to codify a visual language of high and low culture that represented contemporary society in the late 1960s. While largely overlooked in art-historical discourse, Newspaper showcased many of the most revered artists working in the United States at the time, as well as an emerging coterie of queer artists.
The mid to late sixties was a flourishing period for artists experimenting with new media formats such as books, records, and magazines to create or distribute their work. Newspaper was one of the first artist-published tabloids of its era, preceding Andy Warhol’s Interview and Les Levine’s Culture Hero, both of which debuted in 1969. However, in contrast to other tabloids, Newspaper focused strictly on images.
At a time when photography was not being exhibited regularly in galleries, Newspaper provided an alternative exhibition space for the medium and some of the era’s greatest photographers. The publication’s large size and unbound format encouraged readers to take it apart and hang its pages, which was how Newspaper was installed at the Museum of Modern Art’s influential Information show in 1970.
This is not to say that Newspaper only existed within the narrow confines of the art world, far from it. It lived within (and shared contributors with) a robust network of underground and queer periodicals like The New York Review of Sex, Rags, and Gay Power, among others. Yet, unlike many of these tabloids, Newspaper has largely disappeared from the discourse around underground magazines, queer publishing, and artists’ periodicals.
All fourteen issues of Newspaper are compiled in this volume for the first time.
Featured artists include: Diane Arbus, Art Workers Coalition, Richard Avedon, Clyde Baines, Sheyla Baykal, Peter Beard, Brigid Berlin, Richard Bernstein, Ann Douglas, Paul Fisher, Maurice Hogenboom, Peter Hujar, Scott Hyde, Christo and Jeanne-Claude Javacheff, Ray Johnson, Edwin Klein, Yayoi Kusama, Gerald Laing, Dorothea Lange, Steve Lawrence, Jeff Lew, Roy Lichtenstein, Frank Mercado, Duane Michals, Jack Mitchell, Forrest “Frosty” Myers, Billy Name, Stephen Paley, Warner Pearson, Jurgen Warner Piepke, Charles Pratt, Joseph Raffael, Mel Ramos, Lilo Raymond, Ruspoli-Rodriguez, Lucas Samaras, Alan Saret, Bill Schwedler, Leni Sinclair, Norman Snyder, Elizabeth Staal, Stanley Stellar, Terry Stevenson, Paul Thek, Andrew Ullrick, Andy Warhol, William T. Wiley, and May Wilson.
(質問2)これまでの取り返しのつかない失敗をあがない、二度と繰り返さないための方法、その一歩として、「Queers in Palestine」(*2)からの要求に応答することが可能です。その第1項は、「イスラエルの資金提供を拒否し、イスラエルのすべての機関との協力を拒否し、BDS運動(*3)に参加してください。」という要求です。
TRPが2017年〜23年に協賛を受けたアクサ(AXA)、2020年・21年・23年に協賛を受けたヒューレット・パッカード(HP/HPE)は、パレスチナの市民社会からボイコットが呼びかけられている企業です。AXAとHP/HPEにとって、TRPはよい評判を得るための絶好の機会ですが、それで血塗られた手を拭うことはできません。ジェノサイドと共にあるプライドなどありえず、TRPがピンクウォッシングに協力すれば、プライドを売り渡し、パレスチナ殺戮に手を染めるに等しい事態となります。日本と世界のLGBTQ+コミュニティーズを背景に得てきた力を持つTRPが、両企業からの協賛を絶つことには重要な意義があります。パレスチナのクィアと人道の危機からどうか目を背けないでください。
2024年において、そして、AXA、HP/HPEがイスラエルのアパルトヘイト政策を支援してパレスチナでの人権侵害から利益を得ることをやめるまで、たとえ両企業から協賛の申し出があったとしても受けることはないと誓約してくださいますか。