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#(and i don't keep an archive of them somewhere... so i don't have old ones. i also don't do it for iac because that's too much work
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BGT 15/04/2023
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undreaming-fanfiction · 2 months
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I don't even have a clear storyline in mind for this, but I just really, really want to see a modern AU with Eddie as a detective who investigates the Harrington Pharma company. The company is huge and looks clean on paper, but Eddie has a nose for these things, he knows something is wrong. He knows that Richard Harrington ran some sketchy trials and some of Wayne's friends have lifelong health issues, Chief Jim Hopper included.
The company looks almost impenetrable, but Eddie digs. No detail is too small for him. He crosses paths with the owner's son and a board member, Steve Harrington. Eddie despises him. A fucking rich kid, making millions out of other people's misery. His public appearances are well rehearsed, but Eddie knows his type. A shallow, pretty partying douchebag who hasn't had to work a single day in his life. His PR manager Robin Buckley seems way too decent to work with such a bunch of assholes, but Eddie's seen what money can do to people. Either way she's corrupted too.
He meets the younger Harrington several times. The handsome young man is not openly hostile, but he's condescending, bitchy and he looks at Eddie as if he were dirt. "Good luck with your efforts," he sneers when he sees Eddie digging through the public records of Harrington Pharma. "But maybe get a real hobby instead? I hear golf is nice." Eddie wants to murder him.
Eddie cooperates with an investigative journalist, Nancy Wheeler, who keeps all her cards close to her chest, but she still points him in the right direction several times. He collects evidence, partners up with the public prosecutor Joyce Byers. He even meets her son, Jonathan, who is able to get the most damning photographic evidence. No one fully trusts each other, but that's okay. Harrington Pharma is their shared enemy and that's enough.
One day, Eddie makes a mistake. He sneaks into the Harrington Pharma archives and miscalculates the guard shifts. He's stuck hiding under an old desk for hours, he's slowly losing hope, he has no way to contact anyone, his legs are cramping and he's exhausted, but then he hears a familiar voice talking with the guard.
"Hi, Tommy. All good? How's Carol and the kids? That's wonderful to hear. I just need to verify some records for dad, it's not a big deal. Have you had your smoke break yet? You can go, stretch your legs. I'll be here for at least half an hour."
Shit. It's Steve fucking Harrington. Eddie tries to stay still and will his muscles to cooperate, and he thinks he's doing a great job, but then-
"You can come out now. He's gone."
Eddie freezes. How the fuck does he know?
Harrington's voice is quiet, urgent. "Damn it, Munson! You have ten minutes tops before he comes back, so stop playing hide and seek with me!"
He manages to get back on his feet, uncertain and wobbly, and when he sees Harrington leaning over the desk, he's half ready for a fight. But the other man doesn't make a move, doesn't call out to anyone. He just hands Eddie a folder, some of them are the files he selected, but some are new. "I added a few that you missed," hisses Harrington and leans into the corridor. "I'll go first, get Tommy to focus somewhere else. You run to the right and pray to anyone willing to listen. And most importantly," he says, and shit, Steve Harrington can sound serious if he wants to!, "I never saw you here. You heard me come in, used the opportunity and bolted. Clear?"
Eddie just nods. He watches as Steve extends his arm, probably grabbing Tommy by the shoulders and leading him to the other end of the building, he sneaks as far as he can and then he madly dashes for the hole in the fence he made earlier.
The files are it. With all the evidence Nancy, Jonathan and Eddie collected, Joyce can finally take that dark empire down. Eddie is there every day, watches the trial, but then he hears that there are two witnesses for the prosecution from inside the company itself.
It's Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley.
He sees Steve give him a wink from the stand and he wants to kiss the man. Eddie hears all of it in the following days - how Steve used to date Nancy Wheeler, but then her best friend Barb Holland died due to a mishandled drug trial for her condition by Harrington Pharma. How Nancy broke up with Steve, but even with no chance of rekindling their relationship, he vowed to stop his father for good. How he worked in the company for years, climbed the ladder, managed to make enough connections to get his friend Robin Buckley the position of a PR manager. How she helped him to keep up the charade until the very end.
When the Harrington empire finally falls, Eddie watches quietly as Steve embraces Nancy, whispering to her that she did so well, that Barb would be proud. "We finally did it, Nance. We're finally free."
And then, before Eddie can disappear, Harrington is walking towards him, the mask finally off. He looks younger now, his smile is genuine and Eddie can't help it, his traitorous heart is telling him that this is the single part of the Harrington case he'll never leave behind.
"Hi," says Steve. "I...uh. I just wanted to say sorry for all the nasty things I said before. I had to for my cover, but...I just want you to know, I really appreciate what you did."
Eddie just stares at him, blush forming on his cheeks and a crush blooming in his heart. "I'm pretty sure I just butchered your career," he mutters. "And you're thanking me?"
Steve shrugs. "I mean. I'm out of job, I'm a known whistleblower now and my dad's lawyers will probably try to sue me. So that's not great. But if you want to ease your conscience...take me out for a coffee?" Another wink, another squeeze around Eddie's heart.
Eddie fakes a deep sigh and takes Steve by the elbow. "I don't think a single coffee is going to get rid of all my guilt, but it's a start. Maybe a lunch tomorrow would help my healing process?"
Laughing, Steve nudges his side. "Anything for your peace of mind, Eddie."
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copperbadge · 5 months
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What do you mean by digital cleaning?
It's something I've been working on more this year because I had a bit more travel than usual so couldn't do actual home cleaning, but I always take a couple of days in the Month Of Cleaning where I'm focused on my digital life. It's good to make your physical home a comfortable place for yourself, but it's also good to recognize that we have "digital" homes that need attention. And often this is at least less physically demanding, so it's good to keep it in your back pocket for days when you're mentally okay but physically too tired or sore to do more of that kind of work.
In the shortest possible terms, digital cleaning is just making sure that your phone, computer, socials, and other digital "presences" are organized in a way that you find helpful, and that you take a moment to either answer those messages you've been putting off or give yourself amnesty on doing so.
This tends to make a lot of people extremely anxious in a way ordinary physical space cleaning doesn't, so I'm going to put the rest of it behind a cut...
So when I say digital cleaning, I refer to stuff like going through my likes on Tumblr and clearing them out, going through my drafts and turning them into queued posts, answering my asks. I spend time in my email inboxes, either responding to messages or removing them. I am not an "inbox zero" kind of guy, but I like to keep the read-but-not-answered messages to a minimum, and towards the end of the year that usually means a clear-out and amnesty. I clean my Google Drive -- delete old files I uploaded for others, move documents I'm no longer using into an archive, move documents I want to work on into a central work folder. I go through my catch-all folder on my hard drive and organize it; I sort through the year's photos and organize those, partly to archive them and partly because I make a scrapbook from them each year. I don't usually have a ton of tabs open but often have more than I'd like, so I go through them all and either read, bookmark, or get rid of them.
I look in my phone's file tree to make sure I delete files I don't need (mostly menu downloads, Restaurants Stop Making Your Menus PDFs Challenge 2K24) and I sometimes go through each app on my phone, make sure I still use it, and make sure it's set how I want it. If this sounds like a nightmare, bear in mind that I very rarely put apps on my phone to start with -- I think my mother has more apps open at any given time than I have apps on my phone ever.
Everywhere I clean, I look for files named things like "notes" or "deal with" or "random" and move them all into one place so that whatever is in them, I can sort through it and make sure it goes somewhere permanent. Logins go in the login/password spreadsheet I keep, addresses go into my contacts, story notes go into a "fiction scraps" file, random thoughts either get moved into a journal file or put into drafts to become Tumblr posts, etc.
If this sounds like I might have some kind of compulsion disorder, I get that; when I explain my digital hygiene systems a lot of people look at me like I'm spouting a mad but harmless conspiracy theory. But it's something I used to have to do periodically even before I created National Clean Your Home Month, because otherwise I could never find anything, and everything was just...harder. As I once told a boss who admired my organizational skills, "It was this or endless chaos."
Putting addresses into my contacts list means I always know that the addresses I have for my friends are up to date. Putting logins into a spreadsheet means that five minutes spent now will not result in five weeks of procrastination later because I can't find the login and can't do anything else until I do that. Going through my email and archiving old conversations means not only can I find them easily when needed, I don't have to look at them the rest of the time. Sometimes I even go through my various wish lists and remove old/purchased items, or clear out all my "save for later" carts.
There's no doubt this is stressful, but like every part of NaClYoHo, it's broken down into smaller tasks; I don't have to look at my computer and organize everything on it all in one day. I can answer a few asks, then sort photos (something I find very soothing up until the moment I Don't), then read and delete some emails, then I'm done for the day. I can spread "answer or file all your work emails" out over a couple of days. I can maybe empty out my Likes but just turn the ones I actually want to reblog into drafts for now and deal with them later in the "drafts" phase of cleaning. And if I don't manage to empty out my inboxes, at least they're emptier than they were.
I'm struggling this morning with having put a bunch of physical cleaning on the to-do list but not feeling physically up for it, so I did what I felt capable of doing (measuring cabinets for new shelf liners mainly) and later today I might sit down and start building this year's photobook. Or not -- I have to code Radio Free Monday, sort out a prescription and possibly go pick it up, plus a very full day of work and a couple of afternoon appointments I can't shirk, so today may simply be a "get through the day" kind of day. That's okay too; some days the spirit is willing but the schedule is full.
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frogchiro · 1 year
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As mentioned before, my brain has been consumed by Welt ever since I started playing and now please have this little fluffy thirst with him ;;
fem!reader, nsfw but it's really mild, like nothing explicit happens, nipple play and breast sucking >< very fluffy and sweet, possibly ooc Welt, age difference (reader is in her early 20's), reader has a past
!also possible spoilers on the prologue of the game!
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OKAY SO, I imagine this taking place right after departing from Herta's Space Station with the Astral Express. After the disaster at the station you, Himeko, Welt, Dan Hang, March 7th and the newly acquired member of the team, Caelus, set out on a new journey to a planet called Jarillo-VI to possibly learn more about the Stellaron and Aeons.
You were really lucky to join this lively group of so many different personalities, even more so to being able to call them your friends! A life of a mercenary wasn't an easy one, especially since you had to do the dirty work ever since you were barely a teen. It sure had it's moments especially as you got older, being able to wander and see all what your world had to offer, fighting bandits and monster was a thrilling experience for sure! But after years of doing so it quickly became a mundane thing to do, the thrill of adventure gone and replaced with it being more of a (very strenuous) chore to keep food in your stomach. With no one to come home to and with the very few 'friends' you made it quickly became...depressing and frankly, empty.
Everything changed when you met the charming Lady Himeko during one of your journeys. To be perfectly honest you still don't know how it happened; one day you're slaying another monster and on the other you're standing in this brilliant intergalactical train to explore the unknown of space with a group of people who call you their friend and you can finally call that someone too.
But...you'd be lying if you said that you didn't have favorites. Something about Welt and his specific kind of charm made you swoon and his kind heart and old soul only sealed the deal.
But back to present. During the journey to Jarilo-VI all of the members of the team scattered around the train. Caelus was in the main hall looking in fascination into the vast endless space, March was probably somewhere causing trouble, Himeko was busy reading, Dan Hang was probably in his room looking through old archives and Pom-Pom was grumbling something under their breath about 'an unruly pink girl'.
And you? You were staying in your room, deciding on lazing around in your comfy bed before the new big adventure on the unknown planet; something was telling you that there would be much more trouble than any of you thought.
Just as you were laying around and almost falling asleep, a quiet knock reverberated through your otherwise quiet room.
'Come in!' you loudly said, thinking it's maybe Caelus with a question or perhaps March with one of her 'genius' ideas, but it was none of them.
It was Welt, standing just on the threshold of your room, looking tired and quite worn out. Your sleepy eyes widened slightly at the sight of the older man and immediately called him over to sit with you on your bed. What concerned you even more was the lack of resistance from the man, on a normal occasion you'd be elated to see that your partner was finally getting comfortable enough to be more open with his feelings without the 'but it's inappropriate !' talk.
Just the sight of the brown haired man in such a state made you upset so you immediately slid in next to him when he sat down with a heavy sigh. Your hands gently brushed through his graying hair and made their way down to his strong neck and shoulders to massage them a bit and relieve some of the pressure.
The deep pleased rumble coming from Welt's chest was enough of an answer but your massage was soon enough interrupted by the man turning around, broad shoulders moving and soon he was facing you with your face cradled gently in his warm palms, rough with calluses from years of fighting.
You allowed yourself to relax even more, your head feeling heavy again as your eyelids slowly closed again before quietly asking the one burning question:
"Hey love, not that I'm complaining but...did something happen? You're usually not this affectionate", you chuckled slightly and Welt released a amused sigh himself.
"Yeah, guess I'm not huh? It's just...eh forget it darling, nothing important anyway." Welt looked down again while still holding your face, his thumbs gently caressing your cheeks now.
You moved closer to him, your full breasts almost touching his chest with how close you were, and it was your turn to take his face into your hands to make him look at you, a slight flush spreading on his pale cheeks.
"Weeeell, something clearly is bothering you, I can see it clear as day Welt. I'm not going to pressure you into saying it but I see that something is on your mind and not in a good way." You words were accompanied with one of your hands moving up his cheek to his hair where you combed through it, the gray streaked hair soft under your fingertips.
Instead of replying, you saw Welt moving his hand from your exposed thigh, to your tummy before slowly dragging it upward your side only to rest on your shoulder where he slowly slipped the thin shoulder strap from your nightgown down and leaning in slowly to lay a gentle kiss on your neck before moving your your collarbone and shoulder.
You let out a breath at the warm affection from your boyfriend, your hand still in his hair while the other was now firmly placed on the bed to keep you up in your position.
Soon, you felt Welt move down from kissing your shoulder to the beginning of the swell of your breast while maintaining eye-contact with you, his beautiful golden brown eyes half-lidden and dimmed with love.
You decided to move into a more comfortable position and while still cradling Welt's head to your breast, you moved back to lay on your back against the mound of pillows nestled on your bed allowing Welt to cuddle to your side and continue his insistent affections.
A slightly louder breathy moan was let out when Welt started to mouth and lick at your pert nipple before finally closing his mouth on it and suckling, his eyes never leaving yours. You looked down at the man sucking with a content hum and noticed that the formerly tense muscles started to relax in your hold, his face also starting to become more and more lax, a serene far-away look in his eyes.
You let out a quiet pleasured sigh as you let the older man suckle as much as he wanted while still cradling his head and combing through his hair. Whatever it was that was troubling him could wait just a moment longer, Welt finally relaxing in your hold and you did not wish to upset him just as he started to enjoy himself.
You'd address it after Welt felt ready and after your nap. Your eyes slowly closing and breath relaxing, lulled into sleep by the gently tug on your nipple and Welt's quiet hums.
As long as you had each other, you knew everything would be fine.
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ailendolin · 3 months
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You know what I would have loved to see in an episode? Alison going into full research mode to give (some of) the ghosts more closure.
The Captain
We know from the Button House Archives book that a photograph of Havers was found in the commanding officer's belongings. I would have loved to see Alison find it in some old drawer, frame it and place it in the Captain's room (perhaps via suggestion of one of the other ghosts since she wasn't there when the Captain revealed his death). And maybe, because she realises how important Havers was to him, she starts looking into Havers's life after the war just so she can tell the Captain what happened to him and if he found happiness after all.
Thomas
Thomas obviously knows what happened to Isabelle after his death but I think it would have been lovely if Alison had searched for the letters he sent her before that fateful day. Because it's one thing to realise Isabelle has always loved him and quite another to see it with his own eyes. Isabelle keeping his letters would be proof that he'd meant something to her, even after his death. And perhaps there is a poem attached to one of the letters - a genuinely beautiful love poem - that Alison publishes for him so that he and his love that wasn't meant to be will never be forgotten.
Robin & Humphrey
I don't know how realistic it would be for Alison to find records of Sophie post-plot but I think both Robin and Humphrey would be grateful to know what had happened to her. So maybe Alison discovers a marriage certificate with Sophie's maiden name (because she obviously would not call herself Sophie Bone after running away) or a record of a christening that implies that Sophie has found happiness after all. Or, if your want to go down a darker path, a record of her being caught and sent to prison (or worse). But whatever her fate, at least Robin and Humphrey would no longer have to wonder about it.
Julian
I don't care how but Alison should have found a way to get Rachel to Button House. Perhaps via promoting it as an event location specifically to her and her party - and Rachel, thinking visiting the place might give her some closure, agrees to host an event there. The specifics don't really matter. What does is that Julian finally gets to tell her how sorry he is, and how proud of her and everything she's already achieved.
The Plague Ghosts
Those of you who have read my fics know that I headcanon Nigel having a sister in a neighbouring village. I don't think it's unrealistic to assume that some of the Plaguers have left loved ones behind, either because they lived somewhere else or they survived the plague outbreak in the village and left afterwards. They're bound to wonder about what happened to them, just like Robin and Humphrey are about Sophie, and I just like the idea of Alison finding some old church records about the Plaguers' friends and families and surprising them with it.
As for Pat, Mary, Fanny and Kitty I think all of them have already found some form of closure. Pat's family still visits every year. Mary lost her husband when she was still alive and probably had no children. Fanny died where she lived so she knows how the rest of George's life went and must have seen her children regularly as well. The same goes for Kitty. She's seen Eleanor marry and have children of her own, not to mention that Alison has already found documents from her time.
But for the others, the ones mentioned above, Alison could have provided some peace and closure with her research, and I think that would have made for a lovely plot for an episode or even stretched over a whole series.
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givemea-dam-break · 1 year
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a/n: part 5 of my lockwood x reader enemies to lovers!!! i did not expect it to get to this many parts, but you all seem to love it, so i will not disappoint! thank you @superpositvecloudshipper for giving me inspiration for an idea :) this one is a little less violent in terms of cases than the other parts and focuses more on emotions - ngl it got me in my feels
warnings: minor descriptions of death, lots of emotions, very minor injury gn reader
full series collection: here
You should turn the case down. You should turn to Lockwood right now and tell him no, refuse to go and just let him, Lucy, and George go themselves, but you can't open your mouth. It feels like your body has been locked into place, unable to move as you listen to the woman in front of you explain what's going on in her house.
"My nieces were visiting the other day," Miss Loren, a frail woman despite only being in her thirties, says, "and, while they were playing out in the back garden, they started screaming. When I managed to get them inside and calm them down, they told me they saw a ghost - a young girl, not much younger than you. She didn't make any move to hurt them, nor has she tried to since, but even I can sense her. The whole house... smells like evil, if you know what I mean. She's lurking, and I'm worried she'll harm the girls."
Lockwood nods, offering her a reassuring smile. "Of course. If you're happy with it, we'll come round tonight to scout out the house and get rid of her. Do you have somewhere to stay tonight?"
Miss Loren nods, brushing her hands over her jeans. "Yes, I haven't been in my house for a few days. Here's the key."
She reaches into her pocket, pulls out a silver key and passes it to Lockwood. With trembling hands, she takes a sip of her tea. George is watching her closely, not because he's concerned but because of one of the few rules in the house: no one can eat the cake or biscuits until the client has, and Miss Loren hasn't touched the plate of assorted biscuits.
"I best be off," she says. "If you could give me a call in the morning, I will come meet you back here and organise payment."
Standing, Lockwood smiles a little brighter. "Thank you. I'll show you out."
The two disappear from the living room, and it feels like a thick blanket has been removed from your head. You can breathe a little easier.
Lockwood returns a moment later. "So! We've got a case."
"I'll head to the Archives," George says, shutting his notebook with details from the meeting. "I'll be back for four. That gives us enough time to get there, right?"
"Should do." Lockwood glances at his watch. "I'll head to Satchel's, pick up some bits and bobs. (name), Luce, do you guys mind oiling the chains and packing the bags ready?"
Lucy nods, but it takes a minute for the words to register. Slowly, you nod, too.
"You okay, (name)?" Lockwood asks, frowning.
"I'm good," you say. "Sorry, I'm a bit out of it. I've not had any tea today."
He doesn't seem overly convinced, but with one more concerned glance at you, he grabs his coat, throws it on, and slips out the front door. George leaves shortly after.
In the basement, Lucy plays music from an old stereo as you both sit on the ground, cleaning and oiling all of the chains you own, picking and choosing which you think will be best for the case. It's boring work, but you don't seem to mind it today. It helps keep your mind moving.
"You know, you don't have to come on the case if you're not comfortable with it, right?"
You look up at Lucy and frown. "What?"
She shrugs. "Your reaction back there. Something's up. You don't have to tell me, but you don't need to come along. I'm sure we can manage it by ourselves."
"No, it's fine," you say. "I, uh, I have a feeling I'll be helpful with this one."
She looks confused, but she doesn't push the topic any further which you appreciate.
You've only been with Lockwood and Co for a few weeks now, since agreeing to join their team, but already you're starting to bond with Lucy. She was hired shortly after your fallout with Lockwood, which feels like years ago, so you never really harboured a grudge against her. It made it easier to become friends with her, and also makes sharing a room a little less awkward. In fact, you've spent a few late nights together talking about your lives, your interests; just anything that came to mind.
So you're grateful that she's learned when to lay off a topic that makes you uncomfortable.
There's comfort just sitting with her, cleaning the chains as music blares so loudly that you've probably damaged your eardrums. It's different from what Lockwood makes you feel, a soft candle offering up comfort in a dark night whereas he's a raging fire, brightening up the room and giving you warmth. Two very different feelings for two very different reasons.
And, so you go, cleaning the chains, dreading the case to come.
--
"This shouldn't be too hard," Lockwood says. "George?"
George stares up at the quaint house before rubbing his glasses on his jumper. "Shouldn't be. If it's a Type Two, it's very weak, but I'd say it's a Type One. If what I found is right, a girl died here a few years ago - she was maybe about thirteen. Fell out of the tree in the back garden and broke her neck. She died upon impact, seemingly."
Lucy frowns. "The source could be anything, and could be anywhere."
"Not anywhere," you murmur.
Without thinking, you approach the fence at the side of the house, reaching over to the lock on the gate and pulling it free.
"(name), what are you doing?" Lockwood asks. "We need to scout out the -"
You push the gate open, striding into the back garden. Miss Loren has no kids of her own, but her nieces visit regularly, so there's a slide there, along with a climbing frame and swing set. Toy cars are strewn over the ground, but none of that is what you're interested in.
Lockwood catches up to you momentarily. "What are you doing?"
"Saving you getting all of our things out of our bags."
The tree in the back corner looms over you, casting a large shadow in the light of the sunset. A rope swing hangs from one of the branches, so old that it has cinched the shape of the branch, and a sad smile grows on your lips. And, there...
Carved into the bark are two initials that have your heart squeezing with agony. Your fingers brush against the haphazardly scratched letters, and you can hear faint laughter in your ears, the squealing of young children playing around.
"(name)...?" Lockwood says. His voice is cautious.
Before you can be dragged into your grief, you crouch down to the ground, slipping your crowbar out of your bag and hacking it into the ground. You don't have a shovel, but this is the best you've got until you can make the dirt loose. Soon enough, you're digging with your hands, soil embedding itself under your nails as you go deeper and deeper.
Your fingers scratch something wooden, and your heart sinks. With a struggle you pull it out, holding the little box in your hands.
It's nothing fancy, just a little jewellery box bought from a craft shop, covered in faded pen drawings. You kneel there, looking at it for a minute.
"What is it?" George asks.
Before you start crying, you stand, tearing the silver net out of Lucy's bag and wrapping the box in it. "Time capsule."
George frowns. "How did you know -"
"I had a feeling," you say, shoving it into his hands.
Lockwood's looking at you funny, but you won't meet his eyes. "We should wait here a little longer, see if the ghost appears. We don't know if we got the wrong source."
And you do so.
You sit there, obediently, staring at the tree unmovingly. In the darkness, it looks like a monster, stretching its horrible arms out to grasp you and whisk you off into the night. You almost wish it would.
Someone sits beside you, silent for a moment before saying, "You knew the girl, didn't you? Those are your initials on the tree."
It takes all of your strength not to cry. Lockwood's hand reaches for you, and it's only now that you realise you've been picking away at the skin around your nails. Your cuticles are bleeding in places. His hand is warm, comforting, and his fingers thread through yours, squeezing softly.
"She was my best friend," you say quietly. "I used to live in that house just next door. We'd spend most days together, hanging out and playing. We even joined Rotwell together."
"I didn't know you worked for Rotwell."
You shrug, swallowing the lump in your throat. "I left after... Her source, we made that just after we'd both turned thirteen. Time capsules were all the rage, remember? And we wanted to have something to remember each other by if one of us found it later in life. She..."
Tears cloud your eyes, and you're glad that Lucy and George are on the other side of the garden, keeping readings on the temperature around the tree.
"We were climbing that tree one day. We used to do it all the time, and we didn't think it would be any different, but... She lost balance, and she fell. Her parents weren't home, and mine were at work. The newspapers say she died on impact, but she didn't. I didn't call an ambulance soon enough. I sat with her, held her in my arms as she -"
It's too much. The tears spill, burning your skin as they make their cruel descent. It feels like your chest is caving in, destroying your heart and your lungs and every single blood vessel. There's a heavy weight on your shoulders, slowly crushing you.
Lockwood's arms circle you, pulling you into him as he murmurs, "It wasn't your fault, okay? It was not your fault. You were a kid."
By now, you've lost all semblance of your pride, and the sobs come openly. You clutch onto him like a lifeline, the only thing keeping you rooted to this world. All of the feelings you've spent years burying are coming back in tidal waves, filling up your lungs until you can't breathe. Guilt, grief, agony, rage. They all return tenfold.
You've spent years waking up from nightmares, watching that moment replaying over and over again. Sometimes, she speaks to you in those final moments, telling you she loves you or saying how much she hates you for letting her die. It's eaten you alive in the years since, but it became manageable.
Not anymore.
Lockwood continues his chant, telling you that it's not your fault as he holds you to his chest. The sound of his heartbeat, the steady thrum of it, is something you eventually manage to pace your breathing with and, after what feels like years, you can breathe again, though you hiccup every now and then.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he asks softly. "If I'd have known, I would've let you stay back."
Sniffling, you say, "You never would've found the source if not for me. You would've been hopeless."
He laughs quietly, and it helps ease your tears a little more. Still, you hold onto him tightly, glancing up at the garden.
"Where are Lucy and George?"
"They left," he says. "I think they wanted to give you some space. There's been no sign of the ghost."
You don't have the energy to be embarrassed at their seeing you crying hysterically. "I'm okay now."
"No, you're not."
"Yes, I am." You move to sit up, but Lockwood's arms keep you close. "Lockwood, I'm fine."
"I might not know a lot about girls, but I know that 'I'm fine' means the absolute opposite."
Groaning, you settle yourself in his grip, listening to his quiet breathing. You're grateful for him, in all honesty. The way he holds you so carefully, how he's let you cry for so long and ruin one of his shirts with your tears, it makes you realise how much you truly appreciate him.
He's always tried to keep you safe during these cases in the past two months, always willing to sacrifice himself for you. And while that makes you eternally grateful for him, it means nowhere as much as this: him letting you grieve without embarrassment or judgement. You suppose it's because he, too, has had too much to grieve, but maybe he never had this support.
"Her name was Aiva," you murmur. "She was always joking around. She was top of the class while we were in school, and she was set for being important at Rotwell's. She had Sight, like you, but it was her smarts that got her places. I would've followed her anywhere."
Lockwood's head rests atop yours. "I'm sorry you lost her."
You stare at the box wrapped in the silver net a few feet away. How you wish you could open it and skim through the photos and memorabilia within.
A soft kiss on your temple, gentle and barely noticeable. "Let's get you home then, shall we? I'll make you a cup of tea, just how you like, and I'm sure we have some doughnuts left over from our last delivery from Arif's."
A small smile tugs your lips. "That sounds nice."
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cho-aaacho · 7 months
Text
Self-diagnosis
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Masterlist I Archive of Our Own
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Warning ⚠️ : Romance, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Love Bites, Licking, Sucking, Touching, Multiple Kiss, French Kissing, Locker Room, Alternate Universe - College/University, Squeezing, Hugging. (It's probably 18+ so I put a warning)
Summary : Leon asked you how to kiss, saying that it would “Heal his mind from being depressed."
Words : 1,828
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You were seated in class, spacing out while gazing boredly at the whiteboard. It has been almost 30 minutes since you were waiting for your professor. But you didn't find that old man anywhere; guess he's forgotten about his schedule and is somewhere.
From the distance, you could hear a familiar voice. Laughing and murmuring about something, you couldn't catch up with what they were talking about. But you already know who the voice belongs to.
A minute later, Luis and Carlos unexpectedly entered, their laughter alluring the atmosphere and filling the space in your mind. With a smile, you welcomed them to join, ready to hear some gossip from Carlos.
Step by step, the two approached you.
Luis, a man with silky smooth hair, gently winked at you as you gave him some space to sit beside. The scent of his expensive cologne filled your nostrils.
Carlos set a caramel donut on the table. He licked the caramelized donut off his mouth while smiling and supporting his chin with his palm. He noted. “Hey, you want to hear something funny?”
“You guys have something new to share?”
You've always heard the same story over and over, and Carlos will keep telling it whenever his eyes met yours. But you always enjoy listening to him because it helps decrease your stress levels.
So… this one will most likely be the same story again.
But, judging by Luis' expression, you're not sure. Who knows, they can surprise you this time. These men are full of surprises.
“Chris,” Carlos said, laughing as he shook his head. “He gave Leon a romance novel!”
Oh, okay, that's new. Leon was reading a romance novel. That's rare! And he got it from Chris? It's ultra rare!
But… what's so funny about Leon reading a novel?
Maybe he’s attempting to relax by reading something smooth; the last time you saw him, he appeared frustrated and gloomy. You can’t see a light in his eyes, and he ignores you every time you ask him to eat ice cream.
When you looked at him, you noticed a new minor detail about him, such as a dark circle around his eyes or the fact that he had lost his appetite!
He lost the swimming competition to Luis. And of course, it’s hurting his pride. Leon is always full of himself, and being defeated by someone like Luis is frustrating.
Damn you, Luis!
Luis grinned and gently tapped your shoulder, observing your confused expression. "Hmm... it appears you don't understand, eh? Okay, I'll assist Carlos in reconstructing the whole story. But keep it in mind; it would probably hurt your stomach due to laughter!"
Luis rubbed his hands together and pressed them to his cheek. His eyes twinkled for a moment, and a smile spread across his face. As a code, Carlos raised his eyebrows up and down.
When Luis starts his storytelling, you can detect excitement in his voice and the way he attempts to hold back his laughter whenever he mentions Chris, Jill, or even Claire. As Carlos struck the table repeatedly, Luis waved his hands in the air, trying to calm the situation. He looked at you teasingly after he finished the storytelling, attempting to interpret your expression.
“WHAT? Leon did that? Hell, yeah... I’m so glad Jill didn’t hit him in there.”
He giggles. “He almost passed away!”
“Leon deserves that.”
Leon is so silly. Yes. He's probably the stupidest man in this town.
Well, how could you tell? He asked everyone he met about how to kiss, saying that he wanted to do it just like in the novel; he even asked Jill and Chris about that. It’s so random for someone to ask something like that. People might think Leon is insane.
You mocked. "Luis, you should check his brain; maybe an algae stuck on his brain and he lost its function."
Carlos laughed. "He probably didn't have one!"
Carlos continues the story with humor, and he can’t stop mimicking Leon's voice whenever Leon asks someone those silly questions. Luis nodded, perhaps as proof that the story was real or because he didn't want to disappoint Carlos.
After 20 minutes of chit-chat and eating a caramel donut, you felt drowsy; your head was clouded, and the gloriously blue sky above didn't help your tiredness. Luis' voice was also very relaxing, and it made you sleepy even more.
One notification from your phone vibrated the table in front of you; your nap was disrupted. Carlos stared at you for a minute, trying to figure out who the hell changed your expression from sleepy to surprised.
But he was distracted when Luis offered him a chocolate pie with ice cream on top and a caramel macchiato; who could refuse such an offer?
“Are you sure you don’t want to eat chocolate pie with us?”
You glanced at Luis and replied while yawning. “I’m sorry. But I’m so full right now. I also have a class after this. That damn professor, where is he?"
"All right," he mumbled as he stood in front of the door, Carlos peering over Luis' shoulder.
He added. “Tell me if Leon is doing something stupid to you, and I’ll smack his head with a newspaper.”
The two vanished through the door, still talking about Leon's stupidity. That guy. Who the fuck wants to practice kissing after reading a novel? He must be in a desperate state right now.
"Funny..."
You raised your head, reading his message again as if you didn't want to miss them. The message is a typical Leon message in which he apologizes for neglecting you these days, promises to treat you to ice cream, and invites you to meet him in his locker room.
You replied to his message with a grin on your lips. Maybe you can have a wonderful time with him and mock him about that story until he flushes. Who told him these days to disregard you? He must pay for it!
"Well, maybe I can help you, Leon."
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The locker room is a long walk from your class, and you're tired of going there, but that stupid Leon always asks you to meet him there. In your eyes, that locker room was nothing more than a random room filled with chlorine, wet food, and swimsuits, not to mention a large photo of Prof. Albert Wesker in his prime. Leon was always in that locker room following a swim lesson with Prof. Wesker.
Your head is now flooded with Leon and the entire fake scenario you created. You couldn't stop giggling as you walked down the corridor, which shocked Claire when she noticed you.
Now here you are. You smirked as you turned the doorknob, only to be greeted by a familiar face. Leon rose from his seat on the bench and looked to feel the need to punch everything around him.
Before saying sweet words, he grabbed you with his arms wrapped around your waist, slid his lips between your shoulders, and whispered in a raspy voice. "Oh, I'm waiting for you! Listen, I apologize for my recent attitude; I probably hurt you and talked nonsense."
"Well... that's a surprise." You then tease him with your comments. "What's up, sweet boy? Did you get yourself into trouble again?"
"Nope, it's more complicated than that. Something went wrong in my head. I had no idea how to cure it."
He tightened the grip and sniffed your scent. Leon had never held you like that before, which surprised you. He used to hug you, but this hug felt different on your body. Something strange about him piqued your interest.
The way he breathes or talks between your shoulders is out of character for him. He tightens his grasp on your waist and massages your back gently while burying his face between your neck and shoulder.  "I'm sorry if I have scared you."
"Leon... are you okay?"
"I'm not sure if I'm okay; my mind is blank right now."
He interrupted his words and let you out of his arms. You could see him now. His eyes became red, maybe because of crying. The dark circles were gone, but there was still a tired look on his face.
It took him a while to speak. "Someone once told me that if you have pain in your heart, you need a kiss from someone."
You surprisingly blinked your eyes shut. Did he think of that? You didn't know whether he was innocent or stupid.
"Who told you that, Leon?"
"A romance novel I read from Chris."
Yes. He is stupid.
You sighed and massaged your temples. Once again, you stare at him in confusion. "And you really believe that?"
Carlos and Luis were right. This guy is simply foolish. You might be wondering what Prof. Wesker thought when he discovered his student's idiocy. Well, Leon was so good at sports other than that... It's disheartening.
But... perhaps this is a good moment for you to tease and play with Leon. You can tell this story to Luis and Carlos again. It would be the talk of the entire university. Who knows if Leon will realize his stupidity?
"Oh, so what do you want? You want to kiss me, sweet—"
You couldn't finish your sentence, as Leon had already pinned your body to the door and pressed his sweet yet delicate lips against yours. It wasn't a bad move; it was a nice and tender kiss, which made you feel lightheaded when he kissed you back.
He rubbed your chin with his thumb to ensure the kiss, allowing you to feel his embrace even more. To be honest, it feels wrong, yet you were loving it when he did it. Later, he began biting your lower lips, tasting his tongue inside your mouth, and counting your teeth. You reached for his shoulder and lightly squeezed it to get a better feel for him.
"Ahh... Leon... mmh..."
After two minutes of trying to breathe, he slipped his hands down to your waist and groaned softly as you breathed heavily on his face. Leon smiled between kisses because your little sweet mouth sent forth a little whimper. His hand slipped inside your blouse and rubbed his fingertips across your stomach, moving higher and higher until he found your bra.
"Mmh... Leon... stop..."
He breaks the kiss and whispers seductively. "What about this?" He kisses you again and places a slight lick on your neck, sucking and biting it until it leaves a red mark. You squirm in pleasure, trying to hold back a moan.
He added. "Let's continue this in my apartment. Because if Prof. Wesker finds out we were making out, he'll probably kill us."
"Prof. Wesker? Hmm… he wouldn’t kill us. He would send us between hell and heaven."
He laughed and kissed your nose. "Okay. But just as a reminder, I might go wild after this because, damn, your lips are so tempting."
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rubydubydoo122 · 17 days
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In every universe Jason Peter Todd dies young. It’s a fate sealed across the multiverse. Maybe he could hope that there’s one universe where he doesn’t. aka, Jason, Dick, and Bruce go multiverse hopping, and are not having a fun time. (Ps, when I started writing this fic I hced Jason as Latino, but I don't really believe in that hc anymore, so just a heads up if you don't like that hc)
TRIGGER WARNING -> Child Death (it's Jason)
A child was gone. A child was gone. A child was gone. A child was gone. A child was gone. A child was gone. A child was gone.
Seven children were gone. And another one was about to die. And another one and another one, with every new reality they went to, because that was the pattern. 
It wasn’t just Jason dying. It was Jason dying as a kid, unable to grow old. None of his counterparts would grow old.
None of them spoke. It was like they were frozen in time. Except he knew they weren’t frozen because his knees were trembling and he had to clench his fists to keep them steady. Before he could tell what he was doing, Jason was moving. 
He could tell who was comforting who. If he was clinging to Dick to keep himself from floating away or if Dick’s vice-like hug was to make sure he wouldn’t turn into smoke right in his arms.
Finally, it was Bruce who broke the silence, “We should find somewhere to rest. Maybe sit this universe out.”
And honestly, Dick and Jason were too worn out to realize it wasn’t a very Batman thing to say. In fact, it felt a lot like the Bruce they both knew in their childhood. The man that didn’t have Batman bleeding into the person he truly was– Bruce.
Though now that they were relatively back to their senses, he took his time to look around. The magic was strong in this universe. Specifically soul magic.
The sould didn’t feel like they were on a separate plane, like how he learned with Ducra. It felt like each and every soul had the ability to pass through the veil and take on a form in the physical world. Like if everyone had the ability to summon their own version of the All Blades.
They were in some sort of museum. Except, It didn’t feature dinosaurs or WWII artifacts. No. It seemed to feature winged skeletons, but attached to humans. Except they weren’t really attached. As far as Jason could tell, the anatomy didn’t really line up for the back of the ribs to connect with the wings. Though Jason could feel the connection between the wings and the skeleton that ran soul deep.
Bruce smoothed out Jason’s hair,  “Come on, lets go.”
As soon as they got outside, they realized what was different about this universe. There were people with wings. From the shape of a falcon to a songbird, from the wing of a dove to a vulture. He could tell that each and every set of wings was a reflection of that person’s soul. It was their soul.
He thought about Bruce. Maybe his wings would be some sort of Eagle. Strong, sharp, intelligent. Though, those are more qualities of a person, not a soul. And an Eagle didn’t really seem to fit Bruce. You can’t really describe a soul with words. It’s just an energy, a vibe. 
What would Dick’s look like? Dick, a man who was born to fly. Him having Robin wings felt a little too on the nose. He had to have giant wings that drew eyes and signaled comfort. Jason couldn’t really think of a specific wing that would portray that. Unless his wings were unique, and unlike anything anyone has seen.
He wondered what his wings would look like. Would his soul, a soul strong enough to wield the All-Blades, have giant wings that were majestic? Or was he too broken? Would his wings only manifest as a few measly feathers. 
They got to a motel, and the receptionist noticed them immediately, “Oh! Mr. Wayne! I didn’t expect anyone of your status to ever stay somewhere here.”
Bruce gave her one of his signature Brucie Wayne smiles, “It was the closest place.”
She looked from Dick to Jason and gave him a soft smile back, “Rough night out?”
“You could say that.”
She handed them a key, “The room’s on the house. After all you and your sons do for the city, it’s the least we could do.”
Bruce looked a little confused, “Are you sure? I have enough money–”
“Yes, yes, please. I insist. You and your family are the Guardian Angels of Gotham. My boss would throw a fit if he realized I made you pay. Now go! Rest! It’s the least you could do.”
“Oh.” Bruce took the key, “Thank you.”
As soon as they got to the room, Dick face planted onto the colossal bed (For the wings? But sleeping with those seemed like work). Then he rolled over and started pushing all the sheets to the middle. Like he used to do when Jason was visiting the Titans. 
Dick was the type of person who didn’t sleep with any blankets, whereas Jason bundled himself like a burrito. Jason could sleep without them– his time on the streets and in the league made that a necessity– but when given the choice, he’d take the protection and safety blankets provided. 
Of course he knew he could trust Dick to catch him when he fell, or to protect his back, but it took a while for Jason to trust Dick like that . He remembers, way back in the beginning, he used to sleep on the giant couch in Titan’s tower, which slowly turned into sleeping on the ground in Dick’s room. Then to the opposite end of the bed with a pillow wall separating them. 
There was that time, it was a couple nights before Dick left for space. Jason had went to Titan’s Tower after Gloria Stanson died and the whole situation with Fellipe Garzonas. And Dick, he just held him in his arms. Leaning his cheek on top of Jason’s curls. Not saying anything, and just holding him. He didn’t ask any questions. He just gave him comfort.
It was hard for Jason to trust people like that. Trust people enough to be vulnerable around them. Though once Jason trusted someone, nothing they did could break that trust. Sure, they could disappoint him, like Bruce and Sheila, or even in some ways Talia, but he still trusted them with his whole being. Even if he knew Dick didn’t trust him. He probably didn’t see Jason as anything more than a… coworker, or a person who took the face of a kid he maybe used to care about, Jason trusted Dick more than anyone else in the world. He was his big brother. 
Jason rolled himself up in the blankets and scooted until his forehead was slightly touching Dick’s shoulder. Dick immediately melted relaxed That couldn’t be right. Maybe he was just really tired.
Soon he could hear Dick’s breathing even out and knew he was asleep.
He thought about how Jay from the Alley, and Baby Jay would never get that big brother. How the Robin Jays barely got close enough to really know Dick as a brother before they died. Even he didn’t really have the rights to call Dick his brother. Not as much as Tim or Damian, or even Duke. Quality over quantity, and by the time Jason truly opened up he died. They all died.
Jason knew there were infinite realities. He knew there were many realities where he lived, but there had to be equally as many where he died. Maybe even more.
Maybe by coming back to life, he caused one of these many Jasons to die. Maybe that’s why they were on this multiversal adventure. The transporter device is trying to find a reality where his soul fits. Maybe it doesn’t fit anywhere anymore.  
“Can’t sleep?”
He shrugged. Jason knew Bruce would notice he wasn’t really asleep. He was Bruce, he couldn’t not notice. He was somehow simultaneously the most observant and the most obtuse person he knew. 
They sat in the silence that always felt so loud between the two of them. Sometimes, Jason felt like they were the tides and the moon. He knew Bruce was always trying to reach out to him, but in the end, the gravity of Gotham will always be greater than Jason’s. 
He heard Bruce shift in his seat, “Do you… do you remember those nights we’d stayed up all night in the library reading poems?” 
Jason nodded. Of course he remembers. Most of the poems he’d been telling all the versions of himself had been from those nights. 
He also remembered the reason they were up all night. Most of the time it was because they had run into someone he used to work for. He could never sleep after being so starkly reminded of his past. And it was near impossible to build up the guts to get in a bed those nights. 
He remembers sitting in the papasan chair in the library feeling like a bird. He remembers Bruce sitting on the far end of the couch, because even then, he knew. Of course he knew. 
He remembers them going back and forth reading poems they thought the other would like. He remembers watching Bruce’s eyelid get heavier and heavier with each blink, but he still stayed up with him. He doesn’t remember falling asleep, but when he woke up, the poetry books they’d been skimming through were left on the coffee table with green flags marking the poems Jason had liked and orange ones marking the ones Bruce did. Though the only ones Jason ended up memorizing were the pink ones, which both of them enjoyed.
“I never told you, but I used to do that with my mother. Not staying up late, but we used to sit in the Library after I had come home from school, and we’d– we did that too.” 
Jason didn’t really know what to say to that. ‘ Was anything we did original to us?’ or ‘ I special enough to you to the point where you let me share what you once had with your mother?’.
In the end Jason didn’t say anything, because Bruce continued, “Remember the poem ‘Still I Rise’ , by Maya Angelou?”
He nodded. It used to be his favorite. He remembered finding it the first poetry night he and Bruce spent together. Jason had read it first. And almost every poetry night they had they would come back to that one. They both had it memorized.
“It used to be my mother’s favorite too.” 
Jason could never forget the way Bruce read the poem to him. The way he seemed to not just read the poem, but express it. 
He always found it interesting that Bruce, a white man, could resonate with that poem. Though now that he thought of it, Bruce always read it like he was recalling a memory. So maybe Martha Wayne, a Jewish woman, helped him understand.
“Though, after the first time you read it out loud to me, I could only think of that poem being yours.” Bruce paused like he was debating saying something, and seemed to ultimately decide against it.
Jason didn’t know what to say. He had too much to say. Too many thoughts and feelings and actions that float around in his mind but never make it past the layers upon layers of thorns he uses to hurt people. The thornes he uses to protect himself. 
He wanted to tell Bruce to stop playing with his feelings, but he also wanted Bruce to hold him like he held the boy who was long dead. He wanted Bruce to stop using old memories like a carrot on a string just out of reach. He wanted to tell him of the nights he yearned for Bruce’s voice to lull him to sleep through the pattern of the stanzas. He wants to smack Bruce upside the head and tell him that he’s no longer the boy who died and that he’s still the same person. He wanted to scream that he was here and that he hates the person he’s become. Except he wasn’t sure if he hates Bruce or himself.
He couldn’t stand being in the same room as him. He missed him even though he was two feet away. He hated him because he loved him and that love would never be enough. He just wanted to call him Dad, and not worry about Batman taking that away.
In the end all Jason could say was, “‘s our poem.”
He heard Bruce shift, “Is…is it still our poem?”
Jason nodded, Now more than ever. There were nights, he remembered, during the league, during his early Red Hood days, even now, when the only way he can fall asleep is by reciting poems. Bruce’s voice almost lucid in his head. So when Bruce started speaking he had to remind himself that Bruce was really there. Reciting the poem for him.
“You may write me down in history; With your bitter, twisted lies; You may trod me in the very dirt; But still, like dust, I'll rise; Does my sassiness upset you? Why are you beset with gloom? ’Cause I walk like I've got oil wells; Pumping in my living room. Just like moons and like suns; With the certainty of tides, Just like hopes springing high, Still I'll rise.
“Did you want to see me broken? Bowed head and lowered eyes? Shoulders falling down like teardrops, Weakened by my soulful cries?Does my haughtiness offend you? Don't you take it awful hard; ’Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines; Diggin’ in my own backyard. You may shoot me with your words, You may cut me with your eyes, You may kill me with your hatefulness, But still, like air, I’ll rise.
“Does my sexiness upset you? Does it come as a surprise; That I dance like I've got diamonds; At the meeting of my thighs? Out of the huts of history’s shame; I rise; Up from a past that’s rooted in pain; I rise; I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide, Welling and swelling I bear in the tide. Leaving behind nights of terror and fear; I rise; Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear; I rise; Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave; I am the dream and the hope of the slave. 
“I rise. I rise. I rise.”
Jason didn’t remember falling asleep, but he certainly remembers waking up. Because it felt like his soul was being– he couldn’t even describe it. It just felt like his soul was in trouble, but not his soul. It was like it was being ripped out of Jason’s body–
The Jason of this Universe.
He sat up, and realized he was seeing double. Nope not double, there were two Bruces and two Dicks. And an ten/eleven year old Tim, and Stephanie. 
So the stalker probably stumbled across them, and their Jay must’ve gone missing, so they came to them for help. Except their Jay couldn’t be dead because Bruce Dick and Jason were still in this universe. 
Tim, tilted his head like a bird, “Is your arm glowing a normal thing for you?”
Jason looked down. His soul marks. Except Jason didn’t feel any evil entity near him . Was… was Jay being hunted by an Untitled?
Dick, the older one, replied “No.” At the same time Bruce replied with, “Yes.” 
Jason closed his eyes. He’s never been the best at astral projecting, but hopefully trying to track his own soul would make it easier.
The museum.
He made eye contact with Steph who looked bewildered, and spooked all at the same time. So she was probably their witness, 
He stood and headed towards the door, making a motion for everyone to follow, “What’s happenin’, Blonde?” 
“They- They took Jason and it’s all my fault.”
Jason snapped his head back because usually Steph was not one to be so open while being self loathing, “Oi, cut the guilt. Knowing myself, Jay probably chose to get taken rather than you. So tell me what’s goin’ on. And I want a story, no self loathing.”
Steph stepped into pace with Jason, and took a deep breath, “I was helping this kid, she needed help, but she wasn’t trusting me enough to help her. So…so I showed her my wings.” She said it like it was a bad thing. 
He guessed it could be, showing your soul to a stranger, but people flew around with their wings on full display, as far as Jason could tell, it was fine.
“Hm, I dunno if my Bruce has told you this yet, but we’re from a different Universe. One where only birds and bats have wings. I don’t really know the Socio-political climate here. What’s… why was it wrong to show this kid your wings?”
Tim ran up to Jason’s other side, “Wings are a physical manifestation of your soul. There are certain wing types that are super rare. And because they’re so rare,  they’re made to be… a spectacle. People who have mythical creature wings, like, Dick, are you ok with me using your parents as an example?”
Dick, the younger one, gave a wistful smile.
“Mr. Grayson had these huge dragon wings, and- and Mrs. Grayson’s wings were absolutely beautiful! They were Psyche’s wings. Do you guys have the myths of Dragons and Psyche in your world– Nope, I’m getting off topic. The more… I wouldn’t say pure or good, because you can’t really describe a soul with words, but usually your wings mirror your soul, and if you have more mythological wings, the more… magic your soul has. Though, if you’re not careful about who you show your wings to, you’ll probably get trafficked if you have pretty ones. That’s what Jason told me.”
Jason nodded. Then stopped in his tracks as the realization hit like a bus, and spun around, “The receptionist called you,” he pointed at Bruce, “And you,” he pointed to Dick, “the ‘ Guardian Angels of Gotham’ . Does that mean you’re really… ”
They nodded. “I have Powers Wings and Dick has Virtues.”
They were angels . He was literally standing in front of angels . 
Jason turned around and continued walking while whispering  “In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. ” under his breath. He touched his forehead, his chest,  his left and right shoulders and then brought his hands together, “Amen.”
That also meant they didn’t have secret identities, but he was in the presence of angels.
Dick– not the angel one– cleared his throat. “So, you… also have angel wings, Steph?”
She nodded, lip wobbling, “But I didn’t notice there were other people in the alley, and like Tim said Jason said, when you have special wings you get taken and– and before I knew it, Jason was jumping down into the Alley, spreading his wings and telling me to run, and- and he got taken.”
Bruce, the literal angel, face looked conflicted between proud and worried, “He spread his wings? He doesn’t show them to anyone .”
Angel Dick made a pinched face, which meant Dick The Angel knew what wings Jay had. God, he was probably– he probably had songbird wings or something. If he had any other wings, he probably would have a mental breakdown.
They walked through the doors of the museum, as Tim tugged at Jason’s sleeve, “Why are your hands glowing?” 
The feeling of his soul being chiseled out chip by chip became almost overbearing. “Kinda… kinda like your wings, but I got swords instead.” He placed his hand to his heart, to keep it from bursting out of his chest, but it wasn’t working. “Timbo… do you also have Angel wings?”
He nodded, “I have Dominion wings. They’re not as cool as Jason’s though.”
Tim was a literal angel too. And… if these traffickers targeted people with special wings, he couldn’t let Tim and Steph wherever those traffickers were. He couldn’t let another Tim watch his brother die “Alright, I have a really important task for you and Steph.” Jason crouched down so he could be face to face with them. “Whenever I use my soul sword, it takes a lot of energy out of me, cus it’s ya know, a sword that comes from my soul. Do you guys have gatorade here? Specifically lime green.” they both nodded, “Do you also have Arizona Iced Tea, Space Rocks– not pop rocks, there’s a difference– Sour gummy worms, but they have to be the Candy Works Brand, and those strawberry hard candies that grandmas always have–”
“The ones with the gooey center?”
“Yes! Those! Along with the butterscotches they usually have on them too. I need you two to find all of those things. Then I need you to mix the drinks and the gummy worms together, but not the Space Rocks or the old lady candy. Then, I need you to put an old lady candy in your mouth and chant  ‘Acres of All, give All strength.’ Keep chanting until you’ve dissolved three candies each , ok? It has to be three strawberries, three butterscotches.” They nodded again, “And then, once you’re done with the old lady candies, you have to throw the pop rocks into the gummy worm drink, and say, ‘ soul replenisher’ until all the bubbles from the Space Rocks fizzle out. Make sure to take your time. If you rush it, my soul will become very weak.”
Steph and Tim nodded solemnly, “We won’t let you down, Giant Jason.” and they ran off to go find the ingredients.
Jason stood up and walked deeper into the museum, where his astral projection went, but all it led him to was the center of the museum. He could feel his own soul. He could feel the evil presence nearby. They were close enough to where he could summon the All Blades, but he kept them away. Not yet. There had to be a hidden door somewhere. 
He paused in the middle of the room. There were wings with feathers preserved in resin. 
Seraphim Wings. 
All three sets of wings were open wide, they weren’t curled in to veil the angel like they were supposed to. They were spread open. They looked wrong . Then he saw the plaque.
The wings of Thomas Wayne. The first Seraphim in centuries. Seraphim feathers hold special healing qualities that are even rumored to be able to heal fatal wounds. These feathers lose their healing ability after the Seraphim dies. 
Jason felt his blood run cold. This… this was worse than the case that held the suit he died in. This was a dead soul on display– no. This was a trapped soul. Never to be set free. Never to be at rest. 
Dick frowned, confusion slowly making way for horror, “But, Tim said that… your wings are your souls.”
Jason grabbed his Bruce by the elbow before he could fall to the ground.
“Bruce–” He wasn’t sure which Dick said it to which Bruce, but Angel Bruce cut him off.
“I had no say in it. I can never forgive Alfred for it, but this Gotham, this world , it isn’t just magic. It’s also cursed and corrupt. It was the only way he could keep me from living a life in a fighting pit or a cage.”
Angel Dick’s eyebrows scrunched up in worry, “ Br –”
“What about…” Bruce peeled his eyes away from the taxidermy of his father, “What about Mom?” 
Angel Bruce looked away.
Jason could hear his Bruce’s jaw click shut, “You’re a grown man now, capable of protecting yourself. Why won’t you–”
“Don’t you think I tried ?! They came after Dick! I’m trying my best here! And I know my parents would rather have their grandkids safe than their memories honored. I have to pick and choose my battles. It’s not just about doing the right thing, it’s a war against evil . And my parents not being put to rest is a small loss compared to what’s necessary for my kids, and maybe even grandkids, to live in a safer Gotham.” Angel Bruce was looking at Bruce firmly. Eyes narrowed in that way that left no room for argument.
This Bruce was a Protector's Angel. This Bruce fought true evil. And Jason could feel all the Untitled-Like beings crawling around nearby. There was no hoping for redemption when it came to them. This Bruce killed, but it was nessasary. These evil beings would stop at nothing to get what they want.
Jason shifted and walked over to a patch where the stone floor looked off. He lodged his foot into an odd looking cobblestone, and suddenly the ground under him disappeared.
No stairs. Just free falling. Which was good for people with wings, but Jason didn’t really have those. 
He summoned one of his All Blades and stuck it into the wall to stop his fall. 
Angel Dick came diving down, before catching sight of Jason hanging and stopped. “Don’t scare me like that!”
Jason almost slipped off his sword, because, holy mother of Christ, Angel Dick had his Angel wings out.
Jason regained his grip, and positioned himself so he was sitting on the blade like a seat. 
There was the sound of grapples and suddenly Bruce and Dick were hanging next to him. Followed by Angel Bruce floating next to Angel Dick.
Bruce frowned at him, “Didn’t you say the Blades burned up your soul?”
“Only when I stab truly evil things.” He gestured downwards.
Angel Bruce’s expression darkened, “I’m going to head down, and do some recon, you four, wait for me to come back.” And he dove down.
Dick anchored his foot into his grapple, so he was no longer hanging by his arms, and gave a questioning glance to Jason, “Magical soul swords, huh?”
Jason, instead of answering to Dick’s passive aggressive question, shifted on his makeshift seat and rested his head in his hands. He felt like his intestines were entangling within themselves forming a tapestry that read the words, ‘Something was wrong. ’ Something was really really wrong. And he could feel how close Jay was. It was like if he reached his hand through the wall he would be able to grab his hand. Except, Jason couldn’t do that.
Angel Bruce came back up, “I couldn’t see Jason, but there are cages filled with children lining the perimeter of the substructure. There seems to be bidding going on. ART Dick and Bruce, you two sneak around and open the cages while Dick and I will guide them to safety, there are three more exits to the North, East, and West. We are currently in the South exit. Jason…just, try to find my son.”
Jason nodded. He just didn’t know if it’d be in time. With each second he felt like more and more of his soul was being plucked away until he was left raw and pink.
Bruce gave him a nod before grappling the rest of the way down. Dick squeezed Jason’s ankle and followed Bruce’s lead. 
Which left him with the Angels. 
Angel Bruce looked at Jason, “Thank you, for making sure Tim and Stephanie were safe. I know you don’t actually need the gatorade-tea-candy potion.” 
Jason looked at the knee of his pants. They had rust color stains. Blood. Of different Jasons. That were on him because he was too late to save himself. “I just didn’t want them seeing anything they shouldn’t”
Angel Dick floated closer to Jason and cupped his face, “I don’t know what you’ve been through these past couple days, or months, or maybe even years, but just know that you are the most resilient person I’ve ever known. And that I care about you so much.” 
Something about that tightened the knots in his stomach. “I’m not the kid you want to say that to.” 
Angel Dick smiled, and shook his head, “It’s something I know holds true throughout each and every Universe. You’re my little brother. And nothing can change that.”
And with that, the Angels dove down.
Jason shook his head. He’s not the Dick he wants to hear those words from. He knows those words will never come out of his brother’s mouth.
Well, he wasn’t getting any more info by astral projection. Time for the good old fashion way. 
If Jason Todd in this Universe was a son of Bruce Wayne, known to be the Guardian Angel of Gotham, he was probably being kept somewhere secure. Not with any of the rest of the kids who were being trafficked. He would also be up for a secret bid. One that only people with jets filled with money and power could participate in.
He scaled down the wall and lowered himself to the ground in a relatively bold way. Bold enough to catch eyes, but with enough menace to avoid weapons. Just like old times.
He scanned the crowd. A crowd reeking of Untitled energy– it wasn’t everyone, but a solid amount. 
Though there was one who stood out the most. 
Jason kept his hands in his pockets as he strode forwards. Hands in his pockets meant he had something to hide. Striding forwards with his chin slightly down, but his eyes fixed on one person, meant he had prey.
He loomed over the man. Close enough for him to feel Jason’s presence, but not to the point where they were touching. He spoke low, “Rumor has it you have some of the best Wings Gotham has to offer. Most of what I’m seeing here, I could find in Metropolis or New York.”
The monster of a man didn’t flinch, but he did shift and turn his head to Jason. Good. “What typa wings ya got?”
Jason smirked, in a way that didn’t reach his eyes and tilted his head while he stared through the man, “What makes you think I have any?”
“Whadarya, a cop? Everyone has wings, and I swear if–”
“What if, I told you mine were ripped away slowly. Feather by feather. Skin from bone. Bone from my very being until I was left nothing but a husk of who I used to be. Go ahead. Try to kill me. Though, believe me, you’ve never fought a man who’s already dead.”
The man’s eyebrows deepened, “Stay for the real show. It starts in thirty minutes, after all the wannabes leave.”
Jason slipped back into the shadows without a word. He tracked Bruce and Dick opening cages, and the Angels fly into and out of the shadows. It was a slow process to make sure no one noticed, though they were making good progress. To the point where there were only three cages they hadn’t gotten to by the time the 30 minutes were up.
There was the sound of gunshots as the man he was talking to earlier held a gun to the air and stalked to the center of the room, withering vulture wings visible. “Scram! Or the ceiling won’t be the only thing with bulletholes in it.” Just to prove his point, vulture wings grabbed the nearest person and shot them in the head.
There was the sound of wings rustling the air as the uninvited guests left. Followed by a couple more gunshots.
Vulture Wings turned back to the remaining crowd, “Well well well, my friends, you’ve just made it to the afterparty, and should I tell you, you’re in for a real treat tonight.” the room erupted into cheers, but died down as soon as Vulture Wings put his hand up. “Now, Now. Before I show you the Good I’ve got stalked up, I’ll be giving you a disclaimer. This one, is not for sale.” a rumble of Boos chimed throughout the basement, “Hold on! Hold on! You’ll all get something out of this. Donny! Bring out the feathers! And Tony! You know your que.” Donny brought four bags to Vulture Man, “Now, we all know our dear Guardian Angels of Gotham. Of Bruce Wayne and his Protectors Wings. And of Dick Grayson and his Virtues Wings. Though, there’s another Guardian Angel. One who’s wings we’ve never seen. There are certain people who theorize that the little one is just a late bloomer, or that he’s not an Angel so to stick with branding he keeps his wings hidden.” Vulture Wings let out a laugh  and unzipped one of the duffles, pulling out a singular, pristine white feather. One that seemed to have an ethereal glow to it. “Boy were they wrong.”
There was the screeching of old hinges being unlocked above them. Something– someone was being lowered from the loft.
A Seraphim.
Angel Jason.
He was hanging by his arms, and his legs were bare. All broken and bruised. His wings were next to bare. Most of The feathers had been plucked off, leaving a spare few that were stained red with blood. Two sets of the broken bare wings were curled in to shield his body and face. The last set were hanging at a painfully unnatural angle. 
“No. No! ” He couldn’t pin down the emotion in Angel Dick’s cry. Rage? Fear? Grief? Vengance ? 
Doesn’t matter, because either way, all hell broke loose.
All the Tainted Wings started lunging for the duffle bags filled with feathers, taking down anyone who got in their way. 
Angel Bruce was busy trying to make sure the duffles didn’t end up in the wrong hands, while Angel Dick was trying to make it to Angel Jason, but kept getting pulled back anyone with Tainted wings who were also trying to get to the Seraphim.
Jason had to get to him. He-he promised Angel Bruce, He he couldn’t let an Angel die.  
Jason summoned his All-Blades, and began slashing and stabbing, with only one thing in mind.
How could they have seen something so holy and defiled it?
He could feel his soul burn up with every Tainted Wing he banished, like a fire that was slowly simmering out, but he couldn’t make himself care. If he had to lose his soul in order to save an Angel , someone who’s soul was probably worth trillions of his, he would do it. He would do it in a heartbeat.
Suddenly, Angel Jason jerked down. 
The rope he was hanging from was fraying. 
Jason’s eyes snapped to Dick, who already had his grapple out and was flinging himself towards the Angel. But he was bodyslammed off of his trajectory. Angel Dick was surrounded by Tainted Wings, desparately trying to shake them loose so he could save his brother. And both Bruces were occupied too.
And Jason… Jason wouldn’t make it to him in time.
He watched as the rope snapped. He watched as the Seraphim fell, seemingly in slow motion. He heard a shout come from Dick, though he wasn’t sure which one. 
He was sure everything had frozen when Jay made contact with the ground.
An Angel had fallen.
Something had slammed into Jason’s head hard, and for a second, he didn’t see the broken wings of an angel. He saw the tattered yellow cape of a Robin. He saw a face that was tinged blue with Hypothermia. A mouth filling with blood from a punctured rib. A neck bleeding out. A Lamb to the slaughter curling in on himself. A doll.
Jason thrusted his Blade into a stomach, as he got back onto his shaky legs. 
A fallen Angel.
Angel Dick rushed to the Seraphim. Mercilessly taking out anyone who was in his way. Jason took out anyone who got too close to the pair. 
Angel Dick cradled Angel Jason in his arms. “Jason… Jason, can you, can you stay awake for me? Please?” Jason knew he was gone, deep in his being, but Angel Dick continued, “Please, Jason. You can… just rant to me about that one story? Like you always do. The one… what was his name, Icarus? It was Icarus right? And spring? It was spring when he fell. It’s not spring right now. And you don’t have– why would anyone have wings made of wax, that’s just stupid. And whoever wrote that story was dumb, because obviously the higher up you go, the colder it gets, so the wax wouldn’t melt, it would’ve frozen and gotten hard. Jason.” Dick shook him and one of his wings stopped veiling his face, “Jason. It’s not spring. You don’t have wings of wax, your–your wings are mine, and- and my wings are yours. You’re my wings. And you can’t– Jason! You asshole, wake up!” Dick smacked his face but it didn’t do anything, “You promised. You promised we could fly together after– after you told Bruce. You promised we’d fly together, and I promised I would teach you. If you can’t fly then I can’t. I can’t. If you’re not next to me, I’m not going to fly. I can’t fly. Don’t you understand? You’re my wings. I can’t fly without my wings.”
Jason realized no one was attacking them anymore. Which was a good thing because he was pretty sure if he stabbed one more Tainted Wing, his soul would completely disappear. 
He felt his knees go limp and his head spin. 
Dick Grayson, the last Flying Grayson, a man who’s feet were probably in the air more often than they were on the ground– something that had to be true across the multiverse, because if it wasn’t that wasn’t Dick Grayson– couldn’t fly because his brother couldn’t. Because it wasn’t Dick’s wing’s that were his soul, it was his family. His family was his soul. His family was his wings. And he couldn’t fly without his wings.
A pair of hands grabbed his face and it took him a moment to piece together that they belonged to Dick. His brother. He immediately rested his forehead into the crook of his kneck, trust be damned. Or whatever complicated feelings that ranged between them, be damned.
Everthing turned white around them, and he was pretty sure he had passed out, until a voice spoke. 
A very familiar voice. 
“You have mastered the All-Blades?”
Jason could feel the very blades in question retract back into his soul as he turned his head so he could confirm who he was speaking with, with his eyes, “Oh. Hi Talia. Yes.” 
And then he passed out.
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fauxfickle · 2 months
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We now return with your regularly scheduled and all too familiar feeling of malaise and the search for "The Great All American Pizza Show!"
So it's been a little under a month since my last post and I've been skimming through commercial compilations from the LA area. I've found some cool YT channels that archive old ads from that area but I obviously don't have anything to show for it. The ads are either too early or too late to be part of this campaign which is a bit frustrating. Something I neglected to mention last time was that I was also looking through Colossal Pictures demo reels to see if they had a snippet of the animated commercial but of course, there's nothing. There seems to be a cutoff point in the early 80s as most demos only show things from that far back. I was able to find some obscure, silent, avant garde, sci-fi film possibly connected to Colossal but I don't think that'll help me much.
Colossal had some sort of "meet the crew" type video where all the employees said they're names but only their first name so I can't really track them down or anything. I'll keep looking, I didn't look all too hard as I was kinda at my wits end at that time looking through ad comps for hours.
I took a bit of a break for a while before reading through the old Pizza Times newsletters from Dec 79 - May 80. The May 1980 newsletter had some cool info about commercials and news features filmed at the various stores. Some of these aren't technically part of TGAAPS campaign but ehhhhhh I don't really care. They're part of early PTT history and I wanna see them damnit!
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Let's go through these starting with Citrus Heights. The Citrus Heights section is loaded with info regarding lost media, 3 in fact! Sacramento's Channel 40 (KTXL), which has since been bought out by FOX in the mid 80s, did a Newsplus at 10 feature on the cyberamic systems at the new store during it's opening week. If we consult the ever so useful Chuck-E-Pedia, we can find that this feature would have been shot and most likely aired on Christmas week of 1979. A perfect pin point set of dates to look through! Next, Chuck was seen in the lead up to the United Cerebral Palsy Telethon which also gives us some idea of where to look. Finally, a TV commercial was filmed, possibly with TGAAPS slogan. Bob Wilkins' ad agency produced it but I couldn't find ANYTHING regarding this company. It's mentioned on his wikipedia but not named, and a even his own website doesn't mention anything about it. It's surprising that someone who seems like a local celeb in there area could have an ad agency that goes almost entirely undocumented.
Next, we move to Sparks, Nevada. Channel 2 (KTVN) filmed a feature on the store for the PM Magazine. The store was visited by reporter Keith Hirshland. Now I'm actually pretty sure I've found this dude! I found a local online article talking about him and the timeline works perfectly. Assuming this was filmed in early 1980, Keith would of been still fresh out of college with a degree in journalism and around 23. He also says he grew up running down the halls of the KTVN office. As a little aside, I'd just like to say don't bother this man or anyone/company mentioned in any of my posts. The last thing we need is to scare off these people.
This last little piece of lost media probably has the best chances of being found out of all the rest. Ben Wattenberg's 1980, from what I can find, is a dry, uninteresting TV news segment hosted by an equally dry and uninteresting host, the neo-conservative Ben Wattenberg. Ben Wattenberg's 1980 itself seems to be almost entirely lost media as only a few stills, episode descriptions, and TV listings exist online. However, this show was on PBS which no doubt has it somewhere in it's archive. What's better is that that there not only an exact date of when the episode will air, but also the name of the episode itself! One user on taptalk was able to find a TV listing which unfortunately doesn't lead anywhere and isn't archive on the WayBack machine. Luckily people actually said the name of the supposed episode which would of been "Silicon Valley: The New Entrepreneurs". We can also find evidence of it in a newspaper from that June 15th.
I sent e-mails to KTXL-40 and PBS on 2/24, so far no responses. I'll wait a little longer and in the mean time look for more leads and contacts. As I said before, don't bother these people/companies. I don't want them to be swamped with calls and e-mails and clam up on us. Bye for now!
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yuseirra · 3 months
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Hello~ I have something to say because there's been something that's been on my mind, leaving me very depressed and concerned for the past couple months. I've been trying my best to be cheerful and uplifting but it's hurting me so much I just can't stand it...I have to be true to myself and let it all out, I feel like a stone's being pushed onto my chest, and I won't feel better without addressing it somewhere, so please pardon me, okay?
I'd been drawing a lot of project moon's fanworks earlier, remember how there's been an incident regarding limbus company and the artist being fired and whatnot? and then there's this stuff going about how fingers are drawn in maplestory, I have no idea about the details but something happened in arknights?? too? I don't play that game but still, well I'd been seeing a lot of these stuff happen for the past couple of months and since I come from a country where that's directly being taken place, I saw a lot of it happen firsthand except for some recent ones, it made me to go terminate my twitter which I had for a decade (I think I had it since 2013 or 2014. not that it matters now anyway, but I miss my friends I had there so much.)
I'm really hurt. It pains me so much to see people dig up a tweet someone's made several years ago using some kind of data crawler or archive and decide to get the mass to bring down a person over it, a person has many sides, how can you determine how exactly someone's feeling about something? and how can it lead to things like death threats, how can people be so eager to make someone "pay", I understand that people can be frustrated over some things, but where's the limit of these things? I felt so threatened and scared and upset, nothing bad's happened to me in person. All I've experienced is kindness and I am very grateful about it, but I can't say I'm not affected. Seeing a lot of things going around secondhand's been enough to put me through a lot of stress.
Some of my videos regarding projmoon's works had been very popular, you may have seen them if you're in the fandom! I used to be very proud of it. Now I'm upset and scared and I am pained, why can't I be as proud of them as I used to be, I put all my love into it back then. It's a terrible feeling. I have mixed feelings about having it up on my channel.. there's a part of me who love my works a lot.. and is happy about it having been able to give a lot of people joy. People have been enjoying it, and they've all been so kind about it. And then there's another part of me wishing I never made it in the first place because it really hurts and I'm reminded of these incidents whenever I see them. Which is such a pity, since I did a really great job with those. I'm still getting new comments with people telling me they are so impressed and all I could think about now is the.. all the, I don't know what to call all that..,
I'm scared that people might come after me and accuse of me being someone I am not, try to dig up my old tweets and find me problematic for doing something unfavorable for the fandom(not that I've said or done anything harmful in the past, I'm sure of that..I've ALWAYS tried my best to spread love when I could. I am confident about that.) maybe I'm being full of myself. Maybe people don't care about me or my works as much and I'll be okay but I have no idea how things will play out. I've been holding out till now, no one can say I didn't try..the fact that I've been keeping my works up there, I've been trying very hard to be strong in my own way (but at the same time I also felt like a coward for remaining in the status quo)
earlier I saw yt recommending me that library of ruina is getting a switch edition and I get reminded of all these stuff, I can't bear it. It hurts me so much. I've been holding this all in by myself since last july, maybe I'll have to take the videos down to make me feel better, but I'm not sure if I'll be safe that way. I deleted my twitter and now it comes to this, I won't delete my tumblr though. I love my experience as yuseirra and I'm happy for all I've received. I wish I could continue feeling that way, I want to believe in people, I want to care for them, and I don't want to think people will try to come after me and hurt me over the choices I make. So let me be strong, whatever I do, I'll do my best to be that way.
Thank you very much!! Lots of love!!
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foone · 1 year
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Hi I'm Foone Turing. I've been here a while but never really did an introduction post, so...
Hi. Yes, that's my name. I'm an asexual trans enby (they/them pronouns), I'm married, and I'm both older than you expect and younger than you expect, depending on what you know me from. I'm a writer and programmer. I'm better known on Twitter, at the moment. I'm well known for being severely ADHD and I'm also on the autism spectrum, somewhere near ultraviolet. I live near Oakland, California, USA, but I grew up on a farm in the south. I'm a furry, but I don't have a fursona yet.
I'm big into retrotech stuff, especially floppy disks. 80s and 90s PC stuff mainly, but I have a passing interest in everything else. I loves me some weird tech that you have no idea ever existed. I'm also big into analog media. VHS tapes, laserdiscs, that sort of thing.
Fandom wise, I'm a Trekie from way back, primarily in the TNG/DS9/VOY/ENT era. I haven't yet gotten into the new stuff, and I have only a passing knowledge of the original series. I'm also a big fan of Babylon 5, Red Dwarf, and Doctor Who (4th doctor, and new who doctors 9,10,11). I watch a bunch of British panel shows: HIGNFY, Mock the Week, Nevermind the Buzzcocks, 8 out of 10 cats (primarily the countdown spinoff).
I am a Big Hater on crytypocurrentseas and AI art. I used to be famously mad at the JWST, but now that it's in space and functional, I've calmed down. They just need to rename it and I'm golden.
I'm currently splitting my social media presence across three sites:
* Tumblr, obviously. Shitposting, jokes, queer stuff, and queer joke shitposts are all going here.
* mastodon: I'm putting my tech stuff here. Teardowns, building new death generators, fun historical weirdness.
* Twitter: formerly my primary platform, but now I just use it to keep in touch with people and make fun of the impending collapse of Twitter.
Stuff I do and have done after the readmore.
(I'm on mobile now but I'll get back to this on the desktop and add more links)
* I run lettuce.wtf, a webcam showing a lettuce to see if it will outlast Twitter. (My money is literally on the lettuce)
* my long running site The Death Generator: a tool for making fake video game screenshots, with user supplied dialogue.
* I run some Twitter bots, one of which is more popular than me, and all of which will need to be migrated soon: Gay Cats, WinIcons, Print Shop Deluxe, and Every Clue Line.
* I got Microsoft 3D Movie Maker open sourced
* I got rickrolled so hard that it ended up on national TV
* I ran doom on a pregnancy test
* I have made many horrible and weird keyboards. Keyboards with hair, keyboards which write poetry, keyboards that take 5 hours to say "hello world", keyboards with randomly placed keys, keyboards with 7 toggle switches instead of buttons, and many more.
* I tear down random electronics and try to figure out and explain how they work. (originally on Twitter, but moving over to mastodon now)
* I pissed off the FBI on more than one occasion. They tried to get me fired, they delayed my wedding by over a month, and they mentioned my 4chan nickname in a federal trial.
* I used to work for 4chan. I was a moderator and coder, I created /rs/ and /r9k/, and I convinced moot to destroy the original politics board (for obvious reasons). Things went further to shit after I left, but I am still glad I left. Oh and I also inadvertently prevented the creation of the 4chan dating/meet up site by being too ADHD to actually complete development of it. You're welcome.
* I ran a windows 95 machine for the maximum amount of time. There's a bug where it crashes after 49.7 days of uptime, so I let it happen. I livestreamed the end on YouTube.
* I've done exhibits at the Vintage Computer Festival on the history of floppy disks and optical discs.
* I've worked with the Video Game History Foundation (and others) to preserve old games and game development resources (source code and such). I'm big into archival!
* I wrote a really famous Twitter thread about the surprising way our vision works, which is still circulating in screenshots (including on Tumblr!) something like 5-6 years later.
* I made my old apartment play the Zelda Ocarina of Time shop music when you walked I the door.
* I run the Tumblr animefloppies, collecting screenshots and GIFs of floppy disks in anime.
* I run several other sub-tumblrs for collecting weird things, but I'll have to link them later.
* I am technically a speedrunner. I did the TAS of Duke Nukem 1, episode 1, and a joke speedrun of Solar Winds, where I beat the game by ignoring every single possible objective and just flying to the end, which takes over an hour.
* I used to make games. Some of them are available for download.
* but it still do, too: I'm working on a (currently unnamed) game about managing a dairy farm. Both the developers have ADHD. This is going to take forever before it comes out, if it ever does.
* I'm currently working on three books. Two are compilations of stuff previously twitterized, one is a novel:
- Always Screaming Forever: non-fiction, stories about my career in the tech industry and various other tech/science/history stuff I love ranting about.
- The Other Side of Screaming: fiction. My short stories.
- Mundane Kaya Sona (placeholder title): a linguist gets pulled into an FBI investigation into a car crash. An unknown language leads to the discovery of a wizard living in a forest in Oregon, and an interdimensional plot to smuggle nuclear weapons to another world, and break a cold war stalemate we (the planet earth) didn't realize we were in. I've been working on the setting for this story since I was about 7 years old, and I'm excited to finally get it out of my head and into yours.
* I'm probably forgetting like 5-10 major things I've done but ADHD is a hell of a drug. I'll add more as they come to me.
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sui-imi · 9 months
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[OLD Q&A] Roo answers some stuff
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Hello! A month or so ago, I had Roo answer some questions on twitter. I decided that it'd also be good to archive most of them here, so you guys can learn a bit more :] (some of it is kind of important?? i think... haha)
Click here to read the original tweet and all responses.
NOTE: answers are in character! Therefore, all questions below were answered by Roo! (undereats!sans)
Qs & As under readmore! (warning: long post)
[names listed below are twitter users' URL.]
[Q from LazeroFox] Is there any place that you can’t really go? Like an au that’s destroyed-
[ROO] depends. if you know an AU's coordinates, the bike can create a portal for you. and when we receive orders, the customer's details are automatically sent to our phones.
[ROO] but if an AU's destroyed, it'll either send you to the void, or it won't create a portal at all.
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[Q from mmm99tunas] Does Roo ever get a break? What does he spend his hard-earned Gs on? (aside from gallons of BBC sauce)
[ROO] oh yeah. i get loads of nap time inbetween rounds. just punch in some random cords, hide somewhere and snooze a bit. it's the easy life.
[ROO] (though technically that's not allowed so don't tell my boss)
[ROO] as for my G, usually i spend it at grillby's 2. it's hella good.
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[Q from Malina_Vivvivu] Is there a place Roo hates delivering at :∆?
[ROO] hah... haha... hahaha....
[ROO] the doodlesphere, for one. and those evil sanses. i feel like i age 10 years everytime they're on my delivery list.
[ROO] why are they so violent?? they're the ones who ordered the food???
[M] They like playing before eating ((:
[ROO] is it playing or bullying??? i swear, it's like they only start when i arrive...
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[Q from bl4ck_st4rs] What do you do if you mess up someone’s order? (pick up the wrong one or spill/drop it)
[ROO] woah now. i would never mess up a valued customer's order like that. who do you take me for?
[ROO] but if i did...
[ROO] you just gotta grovel. make 'em think you're gonna die if they don't forgive you. not that i'd ever mess up.
[* He looks shifty eyed.]
---
[Q from sweetnad_uwu] Hi Roo! The traveling moped u have, the only way anyone can get one is if they work to the same company you do? Or is there any other way to get it?
[ROO] hiya. and yep. gotta be a UE driver for the magic bike.
[ROO] the boss is REAL good at keeping track of 'em. they've never left a bike unaccounted for, and they always know when i "accidentally" break mine.
[ROO] feels like they're all-seeing or something. freaks me out.
---
[Q from AnnoyingFox20] dear roo,if you met an actual a person that charming and wise,nice,so caring do you consider to be your bf in your life? 😏😏😏
[ROO] sorry pal. spot's taken.
[* He's fiddling with a bottle.]
[ROO] his name's arbiter. he's real chill, owns the condiment hall. sells the best bbq sauce in the multiverse.
[* It seems he's mistaken 'bf' for 'bbq finder'...]
---
[Q from ZippyDoZane] Zane: Do you deliver to far off kingdoms? Also eh heh heh if you do could you stay for a bit? I got board games that we can play. The king will give you a big tip if you do eh heh heh.
[ROO] "UnderEats - if you can order it, we can deliver it!"
[ROO] ...that's not actually the slogan. it's actually...
[ROO] "UnderEats - tip the drivers, and they'll be your best buds!"
[ROO] ... so what time should i come over?
---
[Q from jasper2450] Have the bad guys ever wrecked your motorcycle?
[ROO] (cough) er... technically THEY didn't wreck it. but if they force me to use it, it's kind of their fault right??
[ROO] i mean, i always tell them, "don't make me use my special attack". and what do they do? they make me use it.
[ROO] so yes. it's their fault.
---
[Q from KaylaTSkeleton] is there anywhere roo likes delivering to?
[ROO] any AU where i can deliver food without being put in a whacky situation is good enough for me.
[ROO] i'm fond of underswap right now. swap papyrus is a real pain in the coccyx, but if i snitch to blue, it always pisses him off. hehehehe.
[ROO] plus they always tip well.
---
[Q from zeni_zetty] have you ever get Chase by simp???...
[ROO] huh? who? (what's a simp???)
[ROO] i mean, i HAVE been chased before. but i don't remember anyone specifically, except those bad sanses.
[ROO] ...do i even WANT to remember?? don't chase innocent workers please...
---
[Q from necropathy_] Do you have any destinations/AUs that you don't mind/prefer delivering to?
[ROO] underswap, outertale, dancetale, that Alphys in the void... [A/N: the alphys is ALIVE by tatatale]
[ROO] and uh... horror AUs. well, they don't really order. but sometimes food just. slips out of my bag whilst i'm passing through.
[ROO] uh. don't tell the boss. we have this whole non-intervention policy, so...
---
[Q from SolarPhoenix7] I know you probably deliver a lot of different foods, but what's your own favorite dish?
[ROO] anything bbq flavoured is delish.
[ROO] by the way. you ever been to grillby's 2? their burgers are to die for. tho honestly i could eat just about anything and enjoy it.
[ROO] as long as it's not mtt food. no idea how they own so many stores across the multiverse. 0 stars.
---
[Q from Greedy621] Hi! Do you ever getting weird requests other than food delivery?
[ROO] the app is only designed for food delivery, so not particularly. but it does has a messaging feature. which is used... creatively... by some people.
[ROO] if anyone ever sends you a pic on there, don't open it. i promise you it's not worth it.
[G] Ok, now I’m curious what kind of pictures have you saw to made you give this advice.
[* He looks like he's remembering something unpleasant...]
[ROO] sorry, client confidentially. trust me... you REALLY don't wanna know.
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Qna Answers!
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Ever since you mentioned that you do darker art besides stardew I've been super curious! Is there anywhere we can follow your work?
NOPE! this is more or less the first time I had much of a social media presence, I did make an Instagram when I was around 12 but I lost the password to it, and honestly... It's best I never find it...BUT I would like to post my other art somewhere! Let me know what social media I should use If you have ideas and I'll go make one! :D
I could use Instagram again but I haven't heard too many great things since I left.
What’s your favorite thing about Stardew? Do you have any other games you’d like to make comics about?
I love the fishing and mining aspect of the game! that and the mini-games. You'd think it be the socializing aspect with what I make but there's just something satisfying about making progress in the mines or getting that impossible to catch fish.
I don't usually have a lot of money to spend on games so I tend to go indie but I also never expected to be making art about Stardew so not really. If I like the characters, I might make comics about them but this is the first time I've done comics about games ever so maybe in the future.
Who is your least favorite bachelor and bachelorette
This was a really hard question to answer, I don't have a least favorite bachelor or bachelorette, I just have favorites. The main reason why is because I've either met people who are like the bachelor's or I can relate to them on a personal level so it's hard for me to dislike anyone BUT THATS A COP OUT ANSWER so I really pushed myself to find something to not like.
I'm gonna get torched but Elliot- gifts are super expensive to get, I know I can just give neural gifts but it's a bad habit of mine of going for the loved gifts and my guys got EXPENSIVE tastes or gifts that aren't easy to get BUT It fits his character as it implies he came from a more luxurious lifestyle. (if the Victorian clothing wasn't a big enough hint) but again, I don't dislike him, he has a lot of comedic potential!
I'm gonna get MURDERD for this one, Leah- I CAN NEVER FIND HER. Her pathing and my pathing NEVER collide and I keep forgetting she goes to the beach to draw sometimes so I never go there and I go to the wiki to find where in the WORLD she is at and 99% of the time is in the cortege but I can't get to her because I don't have 2 hearts yet because I don't run into her unless I remember to look in the saloon IF shes there BUT again, I do not dislike her...I dislike her pathing and that's on me for not thinking ahead. Plus this problem goes away once I DO have 2 hearts.
Whats your favorite crop and who’s your favorite bachelorette?
Coffee! (gee what a surprise 😅) I just love it when I can get one seed, grow it, and then harvest it and multiply my coffee crops by a huge amount! It's not worth much but it's just a satisfying crop to have.
Maru- not exactly a popular pic but I had a lot of friends who were 10X smarter than me growing up so Maru just naturally reminds me a lot of my closest friends, THAT and she's easy for me to bump into in the clinic.
(I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED IT 💀 but I think it said-) What software do you youse and what do you recommend?
I use Krita, and couldn't recommend it more! (scroll down more to the archive and there are more details about it)
and a UGEE tablet BUT I got it as a free gift. So far I haven't had to replace it yet and has lasted a good amount of time (my old ones lasted a year until I had to replace it) so Idk if I can recommend it and it's kinda expensive. (for me anyway) I'm honestly dreading the day something happens to it and I have to get it replaced :(
It costs about $60usd right now
Question Archive! - stuff I was asked before here for you to find :D
(some of it, the rest is tagged with #ask)
Whats your chickens name (the chicken in your pfp)?
Tudee-chi or Tudee for short!
Got any advice for perfection?
This website apparently! That and the Stardew Wiki
Okay I have to ask: favorite Bachelors and Bachelorettes?
Alright! Here's a tier list from Favorate to I'm chill with them!
Do you think that the male and female farmer can co-exist as a pair of chaotic twin siblings with joint ownership of the farm?
And I don't see why not! It's more fun that way
Sorry to bother, but can i ask what you use to draw?
Not a bother at all! I love answering questions!!! I use Krita
Who is your favorite stardew Bachelor?
Harvey! and for the dumbest reasons...Harvey ended up being my favorite bachelor for 2 main reasons
Sorry to bother but do you happen to have any tips/advice on drawing bodies and heads??
I ABSOLUTELY DO!!! it's no bother at all
What you need to keep in mind is that a lot of my advice is a suggestion and what I'm comfortable with-
For the future, this will be a question archive of things I'm asked to keep it easy to find once the Mega pin post is ready!
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deramin2 · 23 days
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My Ace Shadowgast Fics
As a disabled gay ace writer, Shadowgast is a really compelling relationship to me, and one of the only times I've seen a demisexual character portrayed very well, especially in a relationship. I write them non-sexually for those interested in fics like that. I tend to write them somewhere between a QPR and romantic and could be interpreted either way as you please. They just are what they are together. For International Asexuality Day, I thought I'd share some of them. Most of my fics are very short.
CAT
Words: 4,228 Chapters: 1/1
After the events of Campaign 2, Caleb Widogast builds a legacy as a teacher and legal activist against the corruption within the Cerberus Assembly. His relationship with Essek remains complicated but strong. An important constant in his life, even when they're apart. Then literally the plot of PIG (2021) with Caleb instead of Nicolas Cage retooled for Critical Role: A reclusive Caleb's cat is stolen and he'll stop at nothing to get her back. To do so he must return to the underbelly of the high-profile life he burned out from. Major spoilers for PIG + an explanation of the often very subtle plot. However, knowledge of the movie isn't necessary if you don't mind spoilers. Major spoilers for Critical Role Campaign 2 epilogue.
Essek Invents Ambient Music
Words: 720 Chapters: 1/1 (Includes playlists for two ambient albums that inspired the fic at the bottom.)
Essek and Caleb develop a magical synthesizer and Essek develops ambient music as an artistic hobby.
Love Is A Multicourse Soup Dinner
Words: 901 Chapters: 1/1
Beau talks to Caleb about his relationship with Essek as they prepare a soup dinner.
Essek’s Mobility Aid
Words: 797 Chapters: 1/1
Essek reckons with chronic pain when he's unable to float to avoid detection. He and Caleb develop a new way of using magic as a mobility device that's less detectable. Together they teach both techniques to other disabled people.
Essek's Secret Closet
Words: 123 Chapters: 1/1
Caleb helps Essek keep a little slice of his old life.
Caleb's Fancy Magic
Words: 1,001 Chapters: 1/1
Essek contemplates Caleb's casting style and what it can teach him about his own path forward.
Something Is Fundamentally Wrong With Me
Words: 3,664 Chapters: 8/8 (Last chapter is a playlist to go with the fic.)
When Essek and Caleb have an accidental encounter with strange mushrooms in Aeor, they find themselves both transformed and hallucinating, and it becomes unclear what is and isn't real. As they get through it together, they become introspective and reflect on their relationship and trade poetry. A Long Essek fic. I wanted to write a Shadowgast fic that was very intellectually and emotionally intimate, but non-sexual. If you love queer poetry and song snippets, this fic is full of them, and there are references at the end of each chapter with links to the works where available.
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siriannatan · 6 months
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Seven Seas of Chaos and Mystery - ScottJimmy
This was once upon a time going to be longer, but I had and still have too many projects going on so for the foreseeable future it's going to be here. Maybe one day…
But here are some notes I had:
The Bad Boys are pirates converted into seafaring adventurers/mercenaries/ explorers three-man crew of the Mistake. On one of their trips, they save a merling, Scar, from the aftermath of a pirate-navy battle happening over his home. When they hear he knows their old captain - the famous pirate Martyn, captain of The Littlewood, they decide to let him stay with them so that they may help him look for what happened to Martyn. No one has heard of the pirate in several years but the navy is still looking for him so he must be alive somewhere.
On the way Scott just about might fall in love with the ship's doctor and cook - Jimmy.
Joel is in charge of the 'crew' of driftwood golems and Grian is the 'captain' and navigator.
The last thing Scott remembered from before passing out was explosions and the smell of gunpowder and fire and screams. Human screams. And then nothing... And now there was the pain. Making him sit up with a growl and look around the room in panic. Where was he? It looked like a medical facility, and there was a pretty human...
"Slow, slow, it's okay, I'm a friend," the very pretty human said, turning to face Scott with his arms raised.
"Where am I?" Scott asked, glancing at the door. Escaping was probably a bad idea, he had no idea of the layout or how many or how dangerous humans there were onboard. The gentle swaying made him assume they were still on the sea. That was good. He'd be in big trouble if he were on land now. Really big trouble.
"We're onboard the Mistake... A ship me and my friends travel on, we found you near a battle between pirates and marines," the man explained, calmly, not moving an inch towards Scott. "I'm Jimmy. I promise we have no intention of hurting you but as this ship's doctor, I'd recommend you stay here until you've recovered. You do heal fast but your wounds are still pretty bad," he added as Scott thought what to do now.
"Okay, I'll stay for now," Scott agreed, he could easily escape if the crew tried doing anything shady. "You can check my wounds," he added and tried to relax as Jimmy approached with fresh bandages and other medical supplies.
To his credit, Jimmy was very careful when removing the bandages and checking stitches and cleaning wounds that didn't need those. And was even prettier up close. Scott could not fight the urge to brush some errand hairs off his face. To get this one endeared to him for security he told himself.
"Can I get some fresh air once you're done? It will help me heal faster," Scott asked just as Jimmy was about to ask him what he was doing.
"As long as you can actually walk and don't plan to do anything harder than walking and let me stay with you just in case, I don't see any reason to force you to stay here," Jimmy said with a tiny smile. "Though, I probably should get you a fresh shirt before we go anywhere."
Scott didn't really need any shirts but whatever got him some good proper fresh sea air. "Want to keep the show all to yourself," he joked, not quite meaning to say anything but Jimmy's blush getting darker was worth the slip-up.
"Wha... No, it's to keep the bandages safe," Jimmy stammered but his hands stayed steady as he finished the bandaging. 
Scott chuckled a bit. Pretty and cute. What an interesting human. He thought as Jimmy left to get Scott some fresh clothes. He didn't lock the door, not that Scott had any intention of leaving the room. The cute doctor gave him no reason and as he already thought, there was a chance he'd get lost or run into someone he shouldn't. He did decide that if he ended up having to sink the Mistake, he'd keep Jimmy as a cute souvenir. Scott was familiar with multiple ways to keep him from drowning. But for now, while waiting he checked his fins and scales. The fins were mostly fine with a few little scuffs and scratches. His scales though were probably what worried Jimmy the most. And they honestly worried Scott too. Could he even shift to his other form or was he stuck in land mode? He could still swim like this but not as fast as he would prefer to.
"I'm sorry, I don't know much about treating merling," Jimmy apologised as he caught Scott inspecting his wounds when he came back. "And here, should keep the bandages protected," he added and passed Scott some clothes. "I'll wait outside..." he mumbled and left before Scott could mess with him anymore.
With a sigh, the merling inspected the clothes. They were likely Jimmy's considering the light blue of the shirt the doctor wore and what Scott was given matched pretty closely. And even though Jimmy was not the most built individual he was a fair bit taller than Scott. Most of merling's height was their tail, okay, and if that was out he'd be the tall one. But at the moment Jimmy being taller was a good thing. It meant his clothes were just big enough on Scott to not bother his fins.
Moving was a different thing. It hurt a... bit and Scott maybe thought about calling for help a couple of times. He didn't but trying to walk was a big failure that ended with him on the floor and Jimmy rushing in to help him
With Jimmy's help. After some convincing that fresh air would help. Scott finally got his fresh sea breeze. And it did make him feel a lot better. Better enough so he could probably stand on his own but he kept that to himself. He enjoyed Jimmy's help. So instead he looked around the Mistake. The pirate flag instantly caught his attention. He was about to ask about it when the ship shook. 
"Hide under the deck," Jimmy said already moving up the stairs next to the door. Scott of course ignored his 'request' and followed.
"...did the Marines find us? How the hell are we..." sandy blonde, a short man with a colourful feather in his hat. The captain? Yelled, clearly panicking as he, Jimmy and one more, also shorter man, stared at three apparently marine ships in the distance.
Scott heard about marines. Martyn didn't like them. Jimmy didn't seem to like them. Martyn, back then. And Jimmy now was nice to Scott. And he had a vague memory of those sails from before he passed out. Scott did not like marines. So he leaned on the railing, glaring at the distant ships, ignoring Jimmy trying to pull him away. "Owen? Could you help me a little?" he asked his friend.
Soon marines had different problems from the Mistake. Tentacles of a massive kraken. Owen. Scott's good friend. 
As soon as marines were 'occupied' Mistake's crew came to life. Literally. The other short pirate, brown hair with a green streak summoned kind of clones of himself out of nothing. The clones moved to get the ship moving away as fast as it could as Scott waved at the kraken.
"Wha... Where... Scott?" Jimmy asked staring at the marines trying to flee the kraken.
"Owen. My friend," Scott grinned. "Do you know pirate Martyn? He's a friend," Scott smiled turning to watch the commotion on the Mistake.
"He's our old captain, actually, we're kind of looking for him," the captain said. "Want to tag along?" he asked with clear ulterior motives. Scott was aware that being able to call Owen and his other friends for help was very interesting to humans.
"Sure," he shrugged. He was a big merling. A wounded one yes, but he could take care of himself. And if he was to sink the Mistake he'd like to keep Jimmy. He was pretty cute for a human after all. And he was a bit curious about where did Martyn ran away from him to.
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nimata-beroya · 1 year
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I have like a month that I don't do this (oops! 😅), but I remembered today! So, here's an old fic of mine (well not that old, but anyway, I'm doing self-promotion here). Yet another story where Alexsandr Kallus get whumped. Why is he so whumpable? I don't know, but I have a blast writing making him suffer. Of course, that's it with the corresponding comfort at the end, especially if it's Zeb who gives it 😉
Enjoy!
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Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars - All Media Types
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Words: 1897.
Relationships: Alexsandr Kallus/Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios
Characters: Alexsandr Kallus, Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios, Ezra Bridger
Additional Tags: Whump, Whumptober, Day 1, Bound, au where kanan lives and ezra stays home, star wars xtober extravaganza 2k21, swxt 2k21, Prompt: Bound, Hurt Alexsandr Kallus, Established Relationship
Series: Part 1 of Star Wars X-tober Extravaganza 2k21, Part 2 of Rebel Hearts
Summary: After a solo mission to the planet Dela goes south, Kallus finds himself in a tight spot. The Spectres go to his rescue but the actual saving turns out more complicated than expected.
AN EXPLOSIVE SITUATION
An explosion at a distance distracts Kallus from the cramping muscles on his shoulders and back. As the concussive wave rattles the complex, he forgets for a moment the deep ache on his legs and arms aggravated by the stress position he’s forced to be in. He’s sitting on the floor with his legs crossed and his wrists and elbows cuffed behind his back. A thick collar around his neck is connected by a short bar to the cuffs around his ankles and forces him to hunch forward. The bent position makes it difficult to breathe deeply. Kallus concentrates on taking measured breaths.
An alarm for intruders goes off somewhere in the base, and Kallus groans. He’s not afraid of the torture promised by the Imperial captain who visited him earlier, neither he’s of dying. To have lost the opportunity to say “I love you” to Garazeb one more time before dying doesn’t desolate him as much. He’s petrified of what the commotion means. There’s no way for him to be certain, and yet, his instinct tells him that the Spectres are committing the great stupidity of rescuing him. He just knows is them. Nobody else would risk their lives to save him.
He ordered D4 to leave him behind and get away in the Glimmer with the information gathered in their clusterkriff’d mission. Kallus told him not to come back for him. Thanks to his programming, D4 is beyond sentimentalism and affection, which often get in the middle of what needs to be done. Kallus’ life is worth the sacrifice as long as the Rebellion gets what it needs to defeat the Empire. 
The sound of a blaster fight grows louder and louder. As best as he can, Kallus looks at the ray shield trapping him in the cell and the shadows beyond it, revealing the fight going on at the end of the hallway. He listens to a familiar growl followed by the distinct sound of a stormtrooper hitting a wall. He can see in his mind’s eye the powerful image that it’s Garazeb throwing troopers with ease.
His heart flutters with unbound love for his mate, coming for him, but at the same time, dread makes his stomach roll nauseatingly. Zeb is walking into a trap. He won’t be able to free Kallus and will die trying. The thought is far worse torture than any of that his captors have planned for him. Kallus can’t bear the idea of being once again the Empire’s tool to hurt Garazeb.
Keep reading
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