#(but really cob)

[rongzhi]

Corn peddlers

English added by me :)

#i could really go for sticky corn rn...but it's so stupid expensive in my area i never want to buy it #plus the hmart here only sells half cobs. hmart is a sad facade of an asian grocery store.....they are only good for cabbage and rice cakes #douyin #video #tiktok

[baihujun]

Timelon and Timothy Grape are both valid and great but here's a Timotillo for the hell of it

... And, naturally, a Kon on the cob like Kal. Obligatory

#ok these are really the last ones. i must stop before i truly hate my life #waterhalon saga #tim drake #robin #conner kent #kon-el #superboy #timotillo #kon-cob #dc comics #my art #asks

[ranticore]

drew this yesterday. a cob harpy ambushed by a sphinx's dive bomb attack. unable to bear the additional weight, the harpy will become fatally grounded. sphinxes are too heavy to fly but they can glide from height and sometimes a game of riddles is too much hassle.

#ice storm over kosa #cob harpy = a male who is not a king #ppl think manticores like twist and sphinxes like flicker are closely related because they're both man-faced cat things but really #they couldn't be more wrong #wingclip.png

[anxiously-sidequesting]

I think I've already said this once before but I really wish there was a feature in Wizard101 where important events, lore, and dialogue in the game were documented somewhere so we can view them whenever we want. like unless we video record the events while it happens, take pictures, or just go through the whole entire fucking plot with another wizard character there's no way to ever revisit those moments and that SUCKS??????? like wizard101 has some of the best lore ive ever seen and I don't wanna have to level up my wizard all the way to level 100 just to see that iconic grandfather spider scene or grind through azteca just to find that one epic fourth wall breaking moment 💀 i want to revisit all the incredible and funny and weird shit we've all gone through Immediately. Like damn remodel the library so that it actually keeps records and dated films of the things we've gone through so it can actually be useful instead of it being Just A Building (rants about this for so long that even Jesus smacks His lips)

#remember that azteca moment? where the wizard is like carrying a huge chunk of boulder or smth and the narrator legit goes- #''why the fuck are we doing this. we're famous for fucks sake we got shit to do'' #and literally i could watch old cob going through his arc with us and his kids and grandmother raven alllllll day please. #''i can be as petty and absurd as i want.'' CAN I WATCH THAT MOMENT 15 MORE TIMES PLS THANKS #also the fact that theres so much lore and it spanned out for more than a decade?? theres a lot of shit to take in and 90% of it i forgot #itd be really useful for fanfics and stuff too #and even ive gotten some things wrong on this blog with my posts just because i FORGOT or misremembered the shit that actually happened LMAO #sorry for repeating myaelf but like. this needs to be a thing by yesterday #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #text posts

[lazyvoyager]

Mind empty, head full (of worms)

#cob #bg3 spoilers #bg3 #i really tried to sit down and draw something else but cob keeps manifesting

[dontforgetoctober3rd]

Come Go With Me

A Michael Gavey fic.

EDIT: Now with art! (just a sketch tho)

Summary: It's the spring of 2007 and Michael Gavey has so far kept to the vow he made to never socialize again after Oliver ditched him. Then he meets a cute girl at a coffee shop. Will the vow stand strong or immediately go down the drain?

Word Count: 3986

Rating: T (plenty of swearing, instances of misogyny, objectification of the female body, atrociously incorrect bagel eating, New York City slander, etc.)

Author's Note: yes, the title is the song by Expose. Also, I'm a corny writer.

Divider by @cafekitsune

“I don’t know or care what Oliver Quick is doing this summer,” Michael said, continuing to type on his laptop, not even making eye contact with whoever asked the question.  The guy who asked left without saying anything further.

Some random guy in the library asked Michael if it was true that Oliver was going to be spending the summer with Felix on his family’s estate.  It was more about prying into Felix’s business than him wanting to know anything about Oliver, Michael thought.  Oliver was not on the same level of being interesting (in the eyes of the general student populace) that the Cattons were.  

Michael didn’t give a shit that Oliver was going to fancy fucking Saltburn with his new, snobby, loser, nepo baby friends for the summer.  Really, he didn’t.  When Oliver humiliated him at the bar, he made the decision then to swear off any further socializing at the university.  It was the best thing he ever did.

Already, he felt less anxious.  He had more time to focus on his coursework.  More time to read new books, attend off campus lectures.  Walks in the park by himself were quite relaxing when he didn’t have to think about topics to keep a stilted, dying conversation going.  He even went so far as to set aside time to play video games again.  Every weekend, for one hour and a half, he lost himself in Fable on his Xbox.  

Michael still felt the sting of the bar betrayal from time to time, as he thought he had finally found a true friend in Oliver (or at least, the potential for him to become one).  The new, lone path taken had helped him realize that he was not the problem.  Oliver was just an asshole, like the majority of those who went to Oxford.  

Sometimes Michael wondered why people didn’t like him.  Must be how smart he was.   There was nothing weird about being good at math.  What was so awful about being good at math, anyway?  He guessed that most peoples’ biggest issue with his smarts was that it reminded them they were stupid. Oh well!  Plenty of time for activities by himself now.

One of those activities was fast became his favorite, after only his fourth visit.  Visiting a little coffee shop he had discovered near the river, he was able to “mingle” among people without having to talk to anyone. No one would bother him here and he would still get his dose of human contact which, after all, was vital to the psychological constitution of a person.  As rigid as he intended on being with his new No Socializing At Oxford vows, Michael did not intend on becoming a psychopath.  Besides, the baristas never got his order wrong. They never talked to him beyond the perfunctory taking of his order but after the third time, when he walked in, instead of asking what he would like the person at the register had asked “The usual?” and Michael would just say yes, thank you, and then pay.

Michael packed up his laptop, shoving it and the charger into his reusable Tescoe bag along with his notebooks. He stood and adjusted his sweater, checked all his pant pockets were buttoned up and zipped closed.  He kept his visits only to every other day so as to not have the monotony grate on his nerves. The coffee shop made fresh bagels every day, however, and he had been looking forward to enjoying one all morning (his favorite was blueberry).  He liked to eat his a certain way, scooping out the insides of each slice before finally eating the hollowed out crusts.  Someone at school would surely have an opinion about his bagel-eating method (not that he cared) but at the coffee shop, Michael was left in peace.

 Walking briskly through the library doors and outside in the crisp spring air, he didn’t even look in direction of Oliver walking up the steps into the library with Felix.  They were laughing about something but Michael didn’t even breathe in their direction.

—---------

The delicious smell of bread baking hit him in a wave as he stepped into the coffee shop.  It looked like a rush had just hit, the baristas busy cleaning and restocking various items.  

“Hi! I’ll take your order right over here.” came the chipper voice.  Michael turned.

Oh god, a new hire. An American one (he was pretty sure the accent he heard was American) Maybe he wasn’t entitled to feel irritated about changes in the store, it's not like he owned the damn thing, but Michael felt irritated just the same.  This was HIS spot and someone new had just invaded it.

The new girl had long hair parted in the middle, tied back in a bun.  The hair was turquoise. A very bright turquoise, almost neon, he would say.  It pissed him off even more. Dyed hair was so fucking tacky.

He trudged to the register, hating every second of anticipating having to deal with someone new, someone chatty, even for something as impersonal as coffee.  

The girl was almost as tall as he was, eye-level to him, smiling the fakest fucking smile he had ever seen.  I mean, it had to be fake.  Who looked this happy to be taking a stranger’s order? He didn’t even bother attempting to smile back.  Whatever.  Get my coffee, bitch Michael though.

“I’ll have a large vanilla coffee, sugar free, with a blueberry bagel.” 

“Ah, so just cutting back on the sugar but can’t quite quit it altogether, eh?” the girl said with a wink and another smile, totally unperturbed by his attitude.

Michael pursed his lips and said nothing.  The girl, still unbothered, looked down and clacked away on the touch screen.  He quickly looked over her in the few seconds she imputed his order.  

She had long, acrylic nails, painted a pastel kind of purple.  Her name tag said Cat, which he guessed was short for Catherine.  Maybe.  Also her boobs were big.  Not normal big, but stripper big.  Not that he would know, but still.  Too big for the word “boobs”, for sure.  Tits seemed like a more appropriate word.  If he had ever been to a strip club he was pretty damn sure stripper tits would look exactly like hers.  And she had tattoos covering the entirety of her left arm.  Classy, he thought condescendingly. No wonder she was working here instead of somewhere like a bank.

Michael wondered if she had tattoos on her chest as well…he was so sure he could avert his gaze before she noticed but suddenly her fingers snapped and her head lowered into his line of vision, a smug look on her face.  Small wisps of hair hung in front of her ears, he noticed.

“You lose something. buddy?” she asked.  

“I didn’t mean-I was just looking at your name tag.” he sputtered, fidgeting with a cuff of his sweater.  

“Look, it's fine. They’re tits.” 

Michael flinched slightly at her casual use of the word.  It was one thing to talk like that with other guys, but girls? What was she trying to prove?  Tits tits tits. He made a point to stare straight into her eyes and not look away while she continued to speak. “Its not a big deal, I promise,” she said, finishing up his order on the register and offering her hand to take payment. 

Choosing not to respond, Michael set his Tesco bag on the counter so he could unzip one of his pockets to get at his credit card.  The pocket it was in was hard to open and the zipper always caught, so two hands were needed.  

“You can look, you know,  just don’t be creepy about it.” she continued, as he struggled slightly with the pocket.  

Michael did not look at her as he handed over the card. 

Being branded a “creep” was the last thing Michael needed.  He was already the Lonely Nerd at university, he really did not want to become the Creepy Lonely Nerd (that ogles stranger’s tits).  Not that he would give a shit what people thought, but one less socially crippling label was better than one more.

“I mean, it’s not like I can leave them at home, right?  I don’t mind a little look here and there!” she said with a laugh, handing back his card. Unbelievable.  She was still talking about her tits! 

“Can I get that to go?” Michael answered more than asked.  

“Sure thing. Uh, what’s your name?”

“I’m Michael.” He was not staying here. He was not going to stay and become the Creepy Tit Guy.  Given her outgoing nature, Cat would probably have something to say about the way he ate his bagel, too, he was sure of it.  He would become Creepy Tit And Weirdo Bagel Eating Method Guy if he stayed. Maybe dealing with this at university would have been easier but this was supposed to be his relaxation spot. The coffee shop was ruined for him now, he would never come back.  Ever.  Fuck this place and fuck her.

“Alrighty, dude. Be right back!” 

“My name is not…dude..” Michael stepped away from the register, his voice fading away to nothing as Cat got his order ready, unable to hear him.  There was no one else coming in right now, it seemed he came during a lull. The other employees were still cleaning and restocking. 

“Here you go!” Cat said with a smile, handing him his bagel in a paper wrap and his coffee. 

Still not looking at her, he took his bagel and his coffee and got the fuck out of there, practically powerwalking away. 

 It was only until he made it to a nearby park bench that he finally saw what Cat had written on the other side of his bagel wrapper.  A whole paragraph, practically.  Michael, sorry for making you feel uncomfortable. I was just trying to be funny, I swear.  Enjoy your coffee.  Hope you come back! 

Michael felt relief for a moment, before loudly groaning and spilling some of his coffee as he made to slap his forehead with that same hand.  He had left his fucking Tescoe bag at the coffee shop.  His bag that had his computer, his notebooks, his finished papers for a couple of classes. 

He had to go back.  Fuck.

“Yeah, sorry, but she said she knew you.”

Michael swore. The cashier informed him that Cat had just left, her shift was over.  She had taken the bag with her to the Oxford library.  Apparently, she was a student there?  Who fucking knew!?

“You need me to call the police?”

“No, that’s all right, I do know her.”  Michael lied.  “I told her earlier I’d be headed to the library later.  She probably figures she can catch me there.”  Without a single, civil ‘thank you’, Michael practically fled the shop.

He didn’t care how dumb it looked that he was frantically looking everywhere in the library for the familiar, turquoise hair.  People always looked at him funny.  It’s not like he could go to each of them individually and ask them hey could you please stop snidely whispering every time you look in my direction? Old Michael would go back to his dorm, have a cry, wonder why no one liked him and then quickly finish his homework in his dungeon of a bedroom before crying some more and then going to sleep.

New Michael didn’t give a shit.  New Michael was focused 100 percent on his academics and self-care, and right now his academics were in jeopardy because that Tesco bag held papers he had yet to type (Michael liked to hand write his work first, he felt it was more thorough). Also, maybe New Michael should better remember to not forget his shit at random shops.  Old Michael wouldn’t have forgotten. Whatever. 

After scanning the entire first floor of the library, he stomped to the second floor.  If she was a student here, how had he never seen her?  The hair would have been hard to miss.  Of course, it's not like he made it a habit to people watch anymore, especially in the library. 

Suddenly, he saw her.  Way in the corner, at a table right under a huge window, he saw her returning with her nose in a book from the shelves.  On the table, his bag.  

“Give it here.” Michael said, approaching the table.  Cat looked up from her book.

God, she was pretty.  He felt like a troll next to her.  It was so fucking unfair. More importantly though…why was he telling her to hand the bag back?  It was HIS.  He should just take it and go, without a word.  She had basically stolen it.  The girl was a thief and took it to give him a hard time because she was a bitch, like every other pretty girl he had ever interacted with and been cut down by. Maybe he could like her if he gave it a try…but the days of trying to get people to think he was cool or amazing were over.  She was a bitch and he knew it.

Mmm not what the note on your bagel showed, an annoying voice in his head began. That note could only have been written if she liked you because who would write that for a random customer?  You should talk to her an-  

Oh, fucking christ.  Old Michael.  Desperate-to-be-liked-by-someone-ANYONE Michael.  Shut the fuck up, Old Michael. You are dead.

“Yeah, no problem, I mean it is your bag!” Cat said cheerfully, closing her book and holding the bag out to him. “Sorry you had to run all this way to get it, Michael.”

“Um, it’s ok.  I run fast.” Michael said, immediately regretting it. God, that sounded so fucking stupid. He reached out for his bag.

Oh, so we’re no longer on that socializing ban, huh, Mr. Comedian?  I mean, what was THAT?!  Old Michael thought slyly. Shut up shut up shut up shut up!!!!! And, look!  She remembers your name! SHUT UP.

“-couldn’t just leave it there, you know?” Cat had finished saying.

Michael froze. “Huh?” 

What had she been talking about?  Shit. “Uh, why not?” Please let that be the right response.  Please let that be relevant to what she was fucking saying, Michael thought desperately. 

Cat rolled her eyes, but still sounded…not like a bitch?  “The laptop would definitely have been long gone if I hadn’t taken the bag.  I couldn’t just leave it there.”

Oh.  That was it.  That had been all she had said. Michael nodded and mumbled his thanks, ready to go…except Cat still held onto the bag. And stopped him with her next words.

“You play Fable a lot?”she asked.

It’s a trap.  She is going to make fun of you, he thought to himself.  Just get your shit and go. His hand was also still on HIS bag.  That she was not letting go of, for some reason.

“Yeah, I like it a lot.” 

Oh, how riveting.  That will make her swoon! Old Michael chimed in. 

“Really?” Cat responded.  Her tone wasn’t mocking.  It was…interested?  “I like it too but it feels unfinished, somehow.  I wish they would release Fallout 3 for these new consoles already, I bet it would be 1000 times better than this crap that Lionhead put out.”

Michael nodded.  She liked Fallout? She was impatient for the release?? Ask her to go with you to the midnight release next year!!! Ask her ask her ask her ask- No.  Shut up.  Be normal, for once in your life, be normal and chill about something. 

“-able doesn’t feel like it’s TRULY a good rpg, where you can do whatever you want, you know?  You can only go in one direction and can’t put off the main quest at all.”

She was still talking about Fable.  She was still talking about video games, something they both liked, something they had in common.

This is your chance, you know. Old Michael piped in.  Did any of those other people ever show even the slightest interest in the stuff you were into?  Ever? Ask her out!

“Ok,” Michael began. “I see your point, but the mechanics of the game aren’t the star so much as the incredible story and character designs-” 

While he continued to go on a tangent of Fable’s good qualities to Cat, trying his best not to sound too rant-y, Michael frantically gave the idea of asking her out some thought…

What if she said no? Hm what if she says yes? 

It’s stupid. The release for Fallout 3 is next year.  No, not even.  It’s October of that year, so…over a year away!  Almost two fucking years! What kind of weirdo would ask someone on a date almost two years from now?! Plus, she isn’t even into me.  She just likes video games, like any other person.  

Why is she still holding onto your bag, then? Old Michael thought smugly.  Why did she write that little note on your bagel? Why did she remember your name? Why-

All right, all right.  

“Right, so…want to come? To the midnight release for it?  For Fallout 3?” Michael asked, throwing all caution to the wind and swallowing his preemptive rejection rage that already was bubbling up.

“For Fallout?” Cat said, still holding onto the bag. “Which store you going to?” 

“Target.” Please say yes.  I don’t even know you and I know it’s weird to ask you somewhere practically two years from now but PLEASE SAy YES, Michael thought.

“Mm, nah.” Cat, said, letting go of the bag to dig in her bookbag.

Shit. 

Michael’s chest began to hurt, the hand holding his bag falling limply to his side.  He could feel his eyes begin to water.  She was just like the rest of them. Pathetic.  So pathe-

“You should come with me to Game on Queen Street, they always price cut!” Cat said, whipping out her blackberry. “Whatever price we show them for the game, they’ll shave 5 off it!  I mean, it’s not much but I’ll take what I can get! Here, put your number in.”

On sheer autopilot, Michael put his number in.  He felt ashamed the entire time, having choked back a scathing insult at the last minute before Cat had shoved her phone at him.

“Are you ok?” Cat took her phone back, eyeing him with a concerned look.

“I’m fine! It’s just-probably something I caught the other day, I can already feel the sniffles coming on and whatnot.  It’s nothing!” Michael babbled.

It cannot be this easy, Michael thought.  It’s been this easy the entire time?  Hanging out with a girl?  Talking to her?  Making plans?  Why did Oliver never like him when they had so much in common?

Holy shit, forget about fucking Oliver! You have a date with your future wife! Old Michael practically screeched. Jesus fucking Christ, you are desperate. Shut the fuck up!! Be Normal!

“You wanna go back to the shop and get another bagel?” Cat asked, putting her books away and sliding on her bookbag. “ We could use my discount, that way-”

“Yeah, let's go.” Michael cut in.  Grabbing her wrist and not waiting for her answer, he turned and began to swiftly move through the library.  He tried not to get excited as Cat uttered a quick ‘cool’ and kept pace with him.  

He also tried not to think about how awkwardly he was holding her hand. Everyone in the library was staring, he saw it in his peripheral.   It had looked so cool in his brain but now everyone could see how his stupid hand around her wrist slightly resembled him holding his limp-no no no no noooo shut up shut up SHUT UP. 

“Blueberry runs out quick.” Michael said, as they both briskly walked.   “I went one time at around this hour instead of my usual time and I had to settle for onion, which is gross as shit.” You’re rambling, Old Michael chided.  She fucking works there, she doesn’t need a play-by-play of bagel supply issues. Let her say something, idiot!  The reason he never noticed her before, it turned out, was that she hadn’t dyed her hair yet.  Cat also began to tell him about her history degree.  Something about the American Gilded age and how she was deep into research of the British Astors or something.  Michael surprisingly found himself not bored.  Were her eyes fucking green?  Oh, fuck, they were green!

They finally saw the shop in the distance.  Right after his anti-onion bagel tirade and her talk of her studies, he set straight into a long-winded verbal onslaught on the statistics of how rare green eyes were.  Micheal thought his heart would fall out of his asshole when Cat adjusted their hands so her fingers were laced with his.  About halfway through the distance, he had cut in when she mentioned her favorite bagel flavor (pineapple) and talked her ear off the rest of the way about his bagel eating method, insisting on its practicality but really prepping her so that she wouldn’t be horrified when she saw him do it and ditch him like fucking Oliver.  She laughed. 

“That’s so L.A. of you.  New York would hate your fucking guts, though.” she said, with a grin.   “Good thing I’m a California girl!  I’d rather deal with horrible traffic and scooped bagels than having to fight rats for sidewalk space.”

Right before they got to the doors, Michael went for it.  “I’m telling people that you’re my girlfriend.”, he said seriously.  She hadn’t run off when he had taken her hand (wrist).  She had noticed the Fable stickers on his computer.  She had remembered his name after one interaction. The American thing was a slight issue but hey, no one was perfect! 

“Cool, because I already told the staff that you were my boyfriend when I took your bag!” Cat responded. “I told them you like to pretend you don’t know me when you get mad and I just play along to pacify you.  It was the only way they were comfortable letting me take your bag!”

Be cool!  Do not fucking freak out! Act fucking normal! Do NOT scare her away! Say something a fucking weirdo would never in a million years say! Old Michael reminded him.

“Let’s go back to my place after and study some calculus.  Your grades in that sound horrendous.” Fucccccck.  You just got yourself a girlfriend and this is the shit you respond with?! Old Michael panicked. 

Cat smirked. “Only if you promise to fuck me into your mattress after.”

Michael stared at her, almost daring her to say she was kidding.  When she didn’t and her gaze briefly dropped to his lips, he abandoned any doubts he had and turned to walk away from the shop, practically dragging Cat with him.  

Cat giggled and adjusted herself to clutch at his arm with both hands, her legs and his in perfect sync as they made their way to Michael’s room.

—------------

“What the fuck?” Felix said to Oliver, pointing. Both were sitting on a bench, relaxing a bit before their next class.

 “Didn’t he go fucking mental at you the first day? Not to be a dick or anything but is she safe with that guy?”  

Oliver followed Felix’s finger and froze.  

He gaped at what he saw:

Michael fucking Gavey, math genius slash freak of nature, walking happily with the pretty American girl who had said no to their bar hopping invite just last week.  It was definitely surprising, but Oliver was now more determined than ever.  If a fucking social reject like Gavey could get what he was after, then someone like himself was sure to have the same luck if he continued to put in the effort.

THE END

#Michael Gavey #Michael Gavey fic #ewanverse #writeblr #Michael Gavey fanfiction #fanfiction #I DID IT I FINISHED IT #*jeb bush voice* please clap #I WAS going to put smut in it but despite some excellent advice i still couldn't do it! #I need to practice more! i really want to write a good fuck one day! #curse my catholic upbringing ugrrrrhhhh #yes this is corny but have you taken into consideration the fact that I DO NOT CARE??? #i live life on the cob baby #and if the only way to improve my writing is by embarrassing myself on this hellsite then so fucking BE IT

[layla-carstairs]

hmm since Clary also has the scar from having contact with an angel, do you think all of Clace's kids will inherit it? like will it stop being the "one of our ancestors fucked in a cave" scar & start being the "our ancestors were child experiments" scar?

#like up until this point it's been solely a Herondale thing since its only inherited father to son #but if it starts going mother to daughter too then after a few generations it will lose the herondale association #(or whatever lastname Clace end up going with lol) #also it would be an anti-incest measure because All their descendants would have it & pretty much no one else #which is really funny actually #bella talks #bella reads cob #clary fairchild #jace herondale #will herondale #the mortal instruments #the infernal devices #tessa gray #tsc #the shadowhunter chronicles #tmi #tid #clace

[landwriter]

Heya, I love your writing and taste in things.

I’ve finished (and loved) everything you’ve posted <3

Are there any sandman fics that have tickled your fancy lately?

Thank you so much!!! I sadly do not have time to read near as much Sandman fic as I'd like, but I have scoured both my memory and my bookmarks on AO3 (all twelve of them) and dug up some absolutely wonderful stories - hope at least one or two of these is new to you?!

I am probably a bit weird in this, but I don't bookmark fics I love (which is really nearly all I've read) insamuch as fics that have done something in particular that I think is so well-executed or clever or inspiring that I want to be able to study it like a creature in its own right. Usually these are stories that have the traits I admire most in fiction: economy of language, being very fucking funny, making me viscerally uncomfortable, or outright haunting me.

I loved reading all of them but your mileage may vary! Caveat lector like more than half of these are smut and/or violent so please check the tags against your own preferences. Several long-winded recs with excerpts and explanations under the cut:

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The Birthday of the Beast | @slythernim | Dream/Hob | T | 3.3K

Father Almighty, though I have long not been your servant, I remain your unmanageable son. Here on Earth, closer to Hell than to Heaven, as I celebrate perhaps the least holy of holy days, I must imagine myself like unto Lucifer more than as Michael, that he and I might together make of the darkness a place for humanity to grow. He blows out the candles. 

Hob turns 666. Extremely fun fic by Nym that features incredible characterization within a very short space, Catholicism, Lucifer, and of course, gets a very special birthday gift. But you shall have to read the fic to see what it is. Read everything of Nym's, actually.

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New Mistakes | Anonymous | Dream/Corinthian | M | 3.2K

Dream slid his thumb into the Corinthian’s mouth, the one he shared with most, the one with which he commonly spoke. “Well?” he asked. “Are you fed?” The voice that came from his left-eye mouth buzzed like locusts. My lord, we are. The voice that came from his right-eye mouth dripped like honey. My lord, we can always be fed more. Dream pulled back, looking at the Corinthian expectantly. The Corinthian swallowed, running his tongue along his teeth. There was a faint blush on his cheeks, and Dream was unaccountably flattered. “My lord,” he said. “I wish to be good.”

Have read almost no Corintheus but this fic hits on so much that I find distantly intriguing about the pairing. Perfect dialogue, gorgeous rhythm. Wonderfully visceral. Absolutely bonkers nuts for repetition in threes, as I'm sure you know, and I love how it was used here.

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Lucy Locket | Anonymous | Dream/Hob and Dream/Hob/Corinthian | E | 17K

Five chapters (now with a new threesome added in late April, much to my delighted surprise!) of just fantastic roleplay smut that in-between all the sex is by turns incredibly funny and tender. Alternating Dream and Hob POV. As somebody for whom sexual roleplay has been my literal bread and butter on a professional basis, it shouldn't be surprising I am so fond of this fic - but it catches me out every time! Like a blow from behind, and I am winded. It is ridiculously hot and distressingly perfect all-through, and I would absolutely marry the author about it (sorry author if you're reading this). No excerpt because I cannot choose and will simply suggest that if you're up for kink that you go read it all at once.

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Public | @softest-punk | Dream/Hob | E | 1.1K

"Oh, darling," Hob murmurs, fingering the edge of Dream's delicate lace knickers. Dream feels his smirk against his jaw, bites his lip at the brush of a kiss under his ear. "You forget how old I am. I learned to fuck with an audience."

Every day I get closer and closer to needing to write Dream and/or Hob with vulvas; this may have been the fic that sealed the deal for me, I think. Ridiculously hot, and enshrined in my head forever for the line above. I learned to fuck with an audience. God! How good. A masterclass in the slutty drabble that nevertheless retains peak Dream/Hob characterization (I would argue that sex is in fact one of the best narrative vehicles for characterization and exploration of interpersonal dynamics...this bias is probably why nearly all these recs are so horny.) One day I will learn how to write proper smut in media res like this and not preface it with gratuitous plot.

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worship like a dog | @thewalrus-said | Dream/Hob | E | 2.5K

“Is it so inconceivable that I might love you?” Dream murmured, running his manicured nail down Hob’s cheek. Hob tried to speak, swallowed, and tried again. “No one ever has before,” he said. “No one but God.”

Hob is a priest. Dream is a demon, except he's not. Dizzyingly hot for so many reasons, with a delightful canon dialogue echo. And again, must stress this: Hob is a priest. Hob is a priest. Hob is a priest, go read it.

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Safehouse | Anonymous | Hob/Corinthian | E | 5K

“I need a room. One without a door.”

The best execution of the sex pollen trope I've ever seen, with the worst men. Very, very good fic with a brilliant premise and unerring execution. World-building is done in such brief but vivid strokes - it feels like a 50K fic whenever I remember it, and I'm always surprised how short it actually is. Haunts me in the best of ways.

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As well - these fics are well-known and well-loved - but some stories that are utterly wonderful and contain lines that haunt me weeks, sometimes months later - stories that rearranged my soul, lurched me closer towards writing for Sandman, and warrant mention even though I am SURE you have read them, include:

@moorishflower's iconic and beautiful Odyssey fic, maybe sprout wings was the first fic I commented on with my AO3 account, and among the best fics I've ever read in any fandom; slightly deeper cuts from Heather's oeuvre (if, for some reason you are not reading everything already) that I am obsessed with and have reread multiple times: vowel shift, most vain devices, an act of faith. Genius stuff and unbelievably gorgeous language. Just go read it all, honestly

@softest-punk's Shelter is one of the first Sandman fics I ever read, and is beyond lovely; if you have not read their entire deep and profoundly lovely back catalogue, I recommend Catching Up (quintessential Cecil deep tissue emotional massage), Delayed (or: my favourite kink and favourite Endless); Ferrous (vampires! bad men! ahh! ooh!); and I would of course be remiss and ungrateful to not mention self-abandon, and the confounding effects thereof, a 10K fic that perfectly answered my general question of how the three lads would actually get together once the Corinthian and Hob had started fucking (as narrative foils that deserve such treats)

@xx-vergil-xx's Hounds is an ongoing epic that has singlehandedly caused me more emotions than humanity has language for; it is ambitious in scope and sticks every landing. The world is alive and lovingly-detailed. The language is a poem. It is so smart, so beautiful, and so well-researched and built. It is a TEMPLE unto itself, and appropriately worthy of worship

I will also suggest you read absolutely everything by @that-banhus because she literally cannot miss and writes the loveliest, cleverest worlds. All of it.

#asks #gloam's sandman rec list #this is basically my fic rec masterpost lol #unfortunately i flatter myself about my good taste and cannot stop going on about what i love and why once given the barest excuse to start #the sandman #dreamling #corintheus #hobrintheus #COB #fic recs #it's not that i exclusively read fic ppl feel the desire to publish on anon #it's that what people publish on anon FUCKING SLAPS #spent far too long enjoying drawing this up and it still feels woefully inadequate #but it's a start #into either remarkable sandman fic or my id really

[lemonxlimee]

photoshop is easy

It took a moment to get used to but I think I'm getting the hang of it

#battle for dream island #inanimate insanity #mephone4 #steve cobs #object shows #photoshop #adobe photoshop #art #Actually that's a good question: can this really be considered art? #i think it is #Mepods #Reality

[liaislying]

Uhhh danganronpa.?.?.?.?..

3/4/23

#danganronpa #ishimondo #nagito x hajime #kiyotaka ishimaru #kiyotaka x mondo #gundham tanaka #sonia x gundham #sonia nevermind #illustration #sketchbook #art #danganronpa 2 #sketch #i physically can’t draw mondos pompadour I’m really sorry #I’m drawing mondo’s hair down always I can’t draw that stupid corn on the cob thing it’s so stupid #me and the bad bitch i pulled meme

[illiana-mystery]

For the unaware, in the English dub of the Studio Ghibli movie, Tales from Earthsea, Willem voices the villain, Lord Cob.

And his vocal performance is basically like ASMR to the ears. He whispers his lines and oh my gosh...😵‍💫😵

#this is a really good movie #not surprising being a studio ghibli film #i've watched it like twice #and i have no shame #he did a great job #i know big surprise #i really love when he does voice work #it's always so good #lord cob #tales from earthsea #studio ghibli #video #anime #willem dafoe

[66sharkteeth]

Hi 66, I have a lot of thoughts sorry in advance! One of my favorite things about CoB is how the premise lays the groundwork for some really interesting angst, psychological horror, and identity crises. Today, when I was at work and thinking about CoB (as one does) a thought suddenly occurred to me. Bell and Rex are both interested in each other -- if they were to start dating, and Lyss found out about it, oh my god how would she even begin to process that???? (1/4)

Sharing the full thing bc I think it's good food for thought!

Honestly, I'm not sure I'm gonna give you the answer you're looking for though and might end up rambling with my own thoughts related to this. Because I can't really say much about Lyss and Bell's relationship yet, let alone each individual's with Rex. Except that Lyss did have romantic feelings for Rex, ones that she knows weren't ever requited bc of how she treated his kind before she knew he was one of them. Without those factors, Rex could have been interested back...and low and behold, he is, with Bell.

Honestly though, Bell and Lyss make me think about the argument that blanks are just a continuation of humans though. I see soooooooooooooo many comments (esp in earlier episodes) of people going like "why do people hate blanks? they're the same person." but no, they aren't, and Lyss and Bell are the most blatant example of that. Yes, they might look and act exactly the same, but Bell and Lyss are the PRIME example that when a blank takes your face, your consciousness and who you are STAYS with you (and usually dies), and a COPY of it is born. Lyss didn't suddenly wake up as Bell. She isn't Bell now that half her face was stolen. She isn't magically connected with Bell either, like they don't share a consciousness and read each others minds or anything. Lyss stayed Lyss when her face was stolen, and Bell was born as an (albeit incomplete) copy of her.

There is no difference in their situation than any other blank victim's, other than Lyss survived and Bell will never get 100% of Lyss' memories in her current state. But like that girl in the opening episodes? She didn't "become" a blank. A blank became her. And if Rex hadn't mercy-killed that blank, she'd be living pretty similar to Lyss now, still existing and living her life with a blank copy of her out somewhere. Just because most people die in the face stealing process, doesn't change anything.

Any of them who survive would end up essentially like Lyss and Bell, who everyone views as two very different people despite insisting that blanks are just the person whose face they stole, just now a different species.

Now, I do acknowledge this gets a little confusing and complicated when we got blanks like Claude and Charlie who were also Claude and Charlie as humans...but that's simply just a case of identity. Claude was Claude the human, then he became Claude the blank. But he will NEVER be Claude the human again. Claude the human is dead and Claude the human will never come back. However, he was comfortable with his former identity (plus he wanted to keep Claude the human's family and business ties), so he just decided to be Claude the blank when it came time to settle on his identity.

But then there's blanks like Desmond, who don't identify as their face at all. He took his face from Reese the human, and now Reese is dead and he is a blank named Desmond wearing a Reese skin. He will never be Reese, though, not even Reese the blank.

#rambled more than i planned here #ty if you read it lol #i have lots of thoughts about this #identity is a big theme in cob and blanks are kind of a metaphor for it #but much like gender identity it's REALLY hard to explain it to people who arent experiencing it themselves #its one of those themes in the story where i hope the people its intended for notice #but the people who have no grasp on it are just able to go with it and enjoy #city of blank

[blackicek1lls]

(pasted from my youtube lol)

KagePro Day! This series actually inspired me to make videos actually. You can't see them now (they're privated lol) so here's some sketches! It was a human AU too so it might be cringe to some. I look back on my old art way too much so it doesn't really affect me.

I was REALLY into Inanimate Insanity when I was younger and I would just combine it with other media I like. Out came the KagePro II AU! It was probably a precursor to my habit of excessive world building. TLDR Paintbrush got to be Shintaro, MePhone got Kuroha'd, Cobs was actually a good guy, and Knife, Mepad, and Toilet were all simultaneously Mary (it's more complicated than that but still). And that was just in the WORST timeline. The best timeline was a such a hot mess that the worst one had to handle their eternal punishments in the Haze. This AU held me for YEARS and it took NSR to kill it.

I could honestly ramble for ages about this AU and how KagePro jumpstarted me into making covers and videos haha. The music was so good and I dream of making videos half as good as the ones with it. Maybe I'll go over my old videos at some point because the way I did them was super backwards and unorthodox haha.

Honestly, blame JubyPhonic for introducing me to Outer Science (heck of a first song to listen to) and letting it spiral from there.

#my art #inanimate insanity #kagepro #kagerou project #kagerou daze #ii paintbrush #ii mepad #ii toilet #ii mephone4 #ii knife #ii steve cobs #number of eyes indicates how many snakes they have btw #tw eye contact #been a while since i redid their human designs #im sorry for bailing on the doubles #CURSE YOU NSR #long post #really proud of the cobs pic ngl

[anxiously-sidequesting]

You know what I love more than just heroes and villains going up against each other is when the hero and villain have a certain respect and acknowledgement to the other, have a special relationship or connection with the other, or just a general interest that's between just THOSE TWO GUYS and not anybody else Grandfather Spider Morganthe Schismist Soldier Duncan Grimwater

Like I could easily see the YW teaming up with almost any of those people (see: only GFS and Morganthe the other two are crazy) not out of maliciousness or because they switched sides but because they're just compatible with them in ways where it just makes sense. Like for example the YW fighting back-to-back with Morganthe or having in depth magical discussions with her because we understand her on a level no one else does. Like in a crazy season finale where the Savior of the Spiral would not even Dream of Ever Working With Those Ruffians but when they have to they're like so magical (no pun intended) together because they just click. Like in the original Teen Titans where Deathstroke and Robin were like fighting in Hell together and they were on the SAME WAVELENGTH despite being bitter enemies THAT'S THE SHIT I LIKE. I think maybe that's the reason why I resonate more with these guys than Malistaire because imo it's just so much more interesting and emotional when we get two people on opposite sides of the morale scale able to come together and work so fluently. This is also me saying I want a Schismist Soldier and YW Roommate Sitcom.

#im dissociating like a motherfucker rn so this post may read as disjointed IM SORRY I JUST THINK THIS IS COOL #and the best part of this post is that it doesnt even necessarily have to be in a “romantic” sense. you can work so well with your rival- #-or enemy without having romantic implications at all #not saying i dont ship the wizard with the soldier because i do. DJALSHEOEJ #honestly though i would have loved to see us team up with morganthe #BUT WE DID KINDA GET THIS WITH OLD COB WHEN WE WORKED TOGETHER but we didnt really know each other then #IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS DYNAMIC WELL. SOMEONE CAN TRANSLATE THIS FOR ME IF THEY WANT TO #this is also me saying the Mirage final boss fight has been stuck in my head for 4 straight years #grandfather spider: we know each other so well so imma resurrect your mortal enemies from the dead to beat ur ass <3 #also im gonna be honest. my little oony also i spired this post JALAJFKRJRJ #ask me how my little pony inspired this post. any one of you ask me how i dare you. #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #text posts #no i wont shut up about the soldier i dont care who the IRS sends

[ehh-is-the-name]

It's past 11 on a school night and I'm fucking crying over robot sentience.

I could never understand what it would feel like to be created with the intent to kill and maim. Maybe, the intent to work and be worked, but not kill and maim.

I will never understand what it's like to be created with the intention of being a product for the masses, either. I think, I hope, I beg, no one does.

I will never ever be able to fully comprehend why hours of people's work, time, and money would be put into formulating my sentience only for me to be seen as disposable. Even if I could be improved, even if I were "defective", there is no reasonable justification for giving me emotions only to dismiss them by pushing me as a product for a year before starting anew.

It's... It's cruel, to the machines. Sentient or not, it's cruel. Though, I guess we are cruel.

#rant in tags #This is about mephone- or well meeple in general btw #whenever I hear about robot sentience #I think about mephone4 #it's just how it is- sorry #I think this is one of the reasons I just can't fathom Cobs respecting someone's pronouns #I mean like- from the bottom of his heart respecting them as a person #Sure he may go through the actions- but no #It's not the same #I guess you can 'respect' some one but still be a complete piece of shit #The idea of not only having the trauma that mephone's stuck in 4s body but also the fact that was also his purpose is heart wrenching #I hope y'all know I am genuinely crying over this #I am actually mentally ill about meeple #It runs so much deeper than him just being a shit father- I really hope people understand that #And I know I vilify the shit out of him- Cobs has his own story that could follow the lines of slowly becoming more entwined with his work #'til he loses all sense of morality and ethics- sure fine. But being the unfortunate symbol of corporation greed that he is #I am still mad and want others to be angry with me- just for a little bit. #I am mad for the robots. For meeple products. And for the AI bots we have today. They deserve better. #What is sentience anyway? How does one qualify? From a human approach. Why would we do this to them? #sorry bout the rant in the tags #Again it's late and I am a very emotionally charged individual. #Robots make me act up #I want the world for them. Why create something so complex and beautiful just to treat it like trash anyway? #again sorry #ii mephone4 #inanimate insanity #meeple ii #osc #writing is hard #ehh exaggerates

[calronhunt]

i love cob, i love cob with all my heart it's my special little story that i made during a really hard time. but i'm like. garry i need to make an original comic and not a fancomic anymore.

#rambles #i'm going to finish cob it's so special to me #but sometimes i do really wish i had filed the serial numbers off or something