#Cybertronian Trash

[heljay]

SMOL VS SMOL

A couple of Victory chibis for your chibi needs! I've got a wallpaper pack for each of these cuties on my Ko-Fi btw, so you can grab those for free (or slide in a donation if you'd like)!

- 2 SLOTS OPEN FOR COMMISSIONS, COMM. INFO IN PINNED

#Transformers Victory #Transformers #Maccadam #TFV #Star Saber #Deathsaurus #Deszaras #artondorf #Cybertronian Trash

[witchofthesouls]

(Sighs) Look, I've gone deep into the barbarian aus, so-

Very self-indulgent TFP!fic where some Others (including humans) from Earth found themselves on Cybertron as they pushed back a Quintesson invasion on their home planet. Elsewhere functions as a nexus of liminal spaces; time and space are warped as gateways to other planets (and universes) open and close.

Like TFP Sparkling!AU with the barbian/city-dweller twist. Also, humans-into-Cybertronians and Magic-Exists!AU because it’s my ridiculous, self-indulgent AU. (Ehhh, more like human characters that always been Cybertronians, but whatever; humans found themselves on Cybertron because of Quintesson invasion/expansion in the Milky Way or something, and they mixed into the locals since Cybertronians and humans are very much cousins and there are members in their respective species that will bang a monster for fun and profit.)

So, D-16 is the most “civilized” one. Like no, D-16 is no senator’s son, nor does he hail from a high-caste lineage. He’s the bitlet of miners and a child slave worker, but he has creators that try their best for their unexpected, little one. Little D-16 had been raised in a communal underground cohort and had never even seen the surface since he took his first cries. Of course, the supervisors get a train of newcomers, including a couple of sparklings from the untamed Wilds that were deemed too “much” for the sensibilities of the middle/higher castes. Too old to forget. And too violent to make it worth it an adoption.

Before Optimus was even Orion, there was a sparkling that scavenged in the Wastelands. He’s a goddamn, feral raccoon with the tenacity of a seagull and a crow's love for tasty things. He’s clever enough to avoid the obvious traps, but hunger had driven him to gamble his luck on a caravan. His luck ran dry since-

It was a raiding caravan, specialized in capturing creatures and mecha. And it was successful snatching a few beings, including June.

She came on a rescue mission and had managed to free a few other sparklings but was unfortunately caught when she made the choice between retreat or free a flyer with a teleporting ability to take the youngest ones.

The raiders were prepared for specific tribes that had practitioners and artificers because of the “monsters” that traveled with them, and shoved her into a cage that neutralized such abilities.

For some reason, magic falls under sigma abilities, so the suppression mechanisms work.

Que Alpha Trion wandering in the “wrong” areas and completely missing his protégé-to-be/reincarnated little brother because of other mecha's last second decision change.

June/Juno is no dainty, wee thing that’s defenseless and cute. Oh no, gentle planets make gentle people. Young Earth was not a gentle planet, and its lost inhabitants made their home in the untamed wilds and Wastelands of Cybertron and warred with the natives to keep it as such. After she recovers, she’s a little hellion that confirms all the negative stereotypes that mecha in city-states have of the Wilders/barbarians of the Wastelands.

The only reason why she wasn't bought by another party is because she's a monoformer and seemed to have none of the famed talent. It would have been too much to bring this little ankle biter to yield without the fantastical benefits to offset it.

Same to be said with Orion-to-be. That sparkling had broken a mech's wrist, straight down to the struts with his teeth. It took a couple of shocks from an electro-staff for him to let go because he was trying his damn best to break something off.

No matter her appearance, June is still a descendant of a hybrid coupling, so many things were a learning curve between them and her. Same with a feral, little nameless convoy.

She got terribly sick with a basic Neocybex language installment. Feverish, delirious, and unable to keep down Energon.

A few of the more tenacious miners still alive and kicking had managed to keep her fueled with a slurry mixture of clay, coal, and crushed crystals. Liquid is easy to purge, but the clay and coal will coat the tank and keep it settled.

Downloads from slugs and chips do not agree with her, so she needed to learn and absorb the language on her own.

Orion got his name for the trouble he gets into for every scrap of fuel and for his keen senses. Little thing isn't afraid to rummage into the scrap pile or to claw his way up the shafts to get a tiny cluster of crystal root. In fact, Scraplet was a major contender for his name, especially since he had a habit of biting people.

Orion had a tendency to use proto-language, even with the full access of basic Neocybex and Kaonite. He struggles with using full sentences. Frustration had led to biting, and that isn’t good, especially at his age where he can do damage with his thick denta. Sometimes, he refuses to speak and just flops into the pen with all the younger sparklings, much to the amusement to the Watchers: mecha too old and worn down for the long hours.

The adults were confused by June's adamant refusal to part with her flimsy dressings. (Sigils and runes sewn into the hardy fabric to hide her magical presence.) And then alarmed over her thin armature. More malleable like a newspark rather than an active sparkling. No wonder she gets sick easily!

It's due to her heritage. The mix between Earth and Cybertron meshed well. The inhabitants had gone local, and their descendants had to adapt with every new generation. In June's (and others like her), they have a far more extended development for plating density and growth. It helps limit the strain on their mothers, and some tribes utilize it to carve sigils while soft before hardening.

Eating a large amount of raw minerals and metals. Orion has a similar habit, but due to deprivation.

D-16 manages to strike up a friendship with them due to proximity and that his creators' cohort took them on.

He likes the pictures Juno draws in the dirt between shifts as everyone rests together.

Language is a slow process for different, yet similar reasons. Juno's lexicon isn't compatible with Ilmentite - a Neocybex dialect used by underground Tarnians (fitting as its name comes from a common mining metal), nor does she have the heavy plating and long streaks of biolights to communicate. Orion, however, struggles with verbal communication and has the body language of a wild animal rather than another mech.

Juno is fast and slippery, and if it wasn't for the tracker/inhibition collar, then she would have escaped. She's able to slip between tighter spaces with her lack of bulk. Unfortunately, she has a tight leash, so she can drop to the ground when she passes a certain perimeter.

Orion and Juno get confused over D-16's queasiness over eating a dead animal. It's drained and it isn't sick, what's the matter?!

Someone (D-16 or his parents) needs to stop Orion from rummaging through the garbage.

#transformers #transformer prime #tfp #fic ideas #megatron #june darby #optimus prime #optimus #bitlets #sparklings #creature #culture clash #maccadam #magic #my thoughts #my writing #trash panda feral OP bitty strikes again #cybertronian culture #cybertronian biology

[lord-squiggletits]

In general Barber writing the whole "Cybertronians are stuck in an endless cycle of violence" thing was a really good idea but it sometimes felt as if he put more priority on the colonists lecturing Cybertronians about how evil and bloodthirsty they are instead of like, having a shred of sympathy for the fact that they were all collectively traumatized by a 4 million year war and even before the war their society was violent/oppressive/dysfunctional so literally no Cybertronian has lived a life untouched by pointless death.

Like, there's "these characters have an outside perspective so of course they don't understand" in universe logic that I understand and even enjoy, but then there's what Barber did which was basically make the story an endless trudge of people fighting each other and never getting better and there was the fucking Onyx Shockwave story that was "yeah that colonization? Yeah I was actually the one that organized the Primes and said that colonizing was a good idea because I wanted to cause chaos lol my master is death and suffering" so it's like. Okay so the entire history of the entire Cybertronian race was organized by one guy, rendering the decisions of all the other characters (including Shockwave himself) basically pointless.

And on top of that I have to sit here listening to these Camien et al OC's constantly complaining and bitching and moaning about how Cybertronians are the stupidest most stubborn assholes ever, why can't they just stop being petty and stop fighting, why is everything their fault. They say this as their own planets sit on the ruins of colonized civilizations. And one of the primary targets of their criticism and bitching is Optimus Prime, who spent the 4 million year war trying to help organics Not Get Colonized and then spent most of phase 2 continuing to try and Help Earth Not Get Colonized Again.

#squiggposting #like it's just.....depressing lmao #no one gets any sympathy no one gets to get better no one gets to be happy #if you had a favorite character from phase 1 chances are they're now overshadowed by a bunch of OCs made for the story #and those OCs spend a good chunk of their time shitting on the legacy characters who are probably your favorites #but even though this could've been an interesting storyline cybertronians never get their collective trauma validated at all #it's just 'why can't you people stop fighting' as if it's their fault and they're just dumb or bigoted or hateful #and if you were here for the colonization storyline? well actually that was onyx prime/shockwave machinating everything #so FUCK YOU TOO it's all pointless there's no point in any of it #now sit here and read 200+ pages of everyone shitting on optimus prime for being a colonizer. lmao #ignore all the feelings you had for your favorite character. how dare you be upset about them being trashed constantly #squiggle being petty

[transingthoseformers]

Back from therapy and I've got something random.

Knockout and Breakdown, upon movie night, accidentally saw Fifty Shades of Gray. Somewhere down the road Breakdown starts telling the story about this one movie that traumatized Knockout and Optimus (who if we remember read the book) instantly knew. Ratchet found this hilarious (as did Soundwave, who had rented the movie online and sent it to KOBD over something petty)

#maccadam #tfp au #transformers #au #tfp knockout #tfp ratchet #tfp optimus prime #tfp breakdown #tfp soundwave #ah yes the one thing for knockout and optimus to bond over: shared bad book/movie trauma #the kicker being how knockout absolutely loves Cybertronian romance trash novels but oh no once it's an earth one there's a problem

[cook-bot-recipes]

Breakfast stuff! (So sorry for my terrible for my posting schedule)

#Food #Transformers #cybertronian food #art #my art #my art is trash

[tfp-is-my-lifeblood-lol]

How would the bots and cons handwriting be like? (Sorry for my bad English lol)

Ahhh! I love this idea! Had WAY too much fun with this.

Bots and Cons Handwriting

Optimus:

-Can write insanely neatly, and in literally ANY font

-Everything he writes looks like it came straight from Google Docs

-He can perfectly recreate Comic Sans, much to the children's amusement

-Handwriting KING

-He's too powerful

Arcee:

-Her handwriting is gorgeous

-She writes very neatly, definitely in cursive

-Everything she writes looks like a diary from the Victorian era

-Majestic✨✨✨✨

Ratchet:

-Cursive, but MESSY cursive

-Like, REALLY messy cursive. What is he even writing? Who knows? It's a mystery.

-You know, cuz, like, that's how a pharmacist's prescriptions look, and he's a medic. Lol

-Ratchet has messy pharmacist handwriting

Bumblebee:

-His handwriting is so cute😭

-Basically Comic Sans

-Not PERFECT Comic Sans like Optimus, but just bubbly and adorable

-Having legible handwriting is something he practices a lot, since his voice box is broken. Writing is a nice way to express himself if need be.

-He has kindergarten teacher handwriting

-My dyslexia would be so happy

Smokescreen:

-Neat enough handwriting, but HE WRITES SO BIG

-All caps, all the time

-He goes through too many notebooks, because he saves NO space

-Poor guy. He just has a big personality

Bulkhead:

-Unreadable

-His hands are just way too big

-Very messy. Only Wheeljack can read it because he and Bulkhead share the same braincells

-Bulkhead and Ratchet get in arguments, because Ratchet's reads Bulk's handwriting, and is like: "Bulkhead, your attempts at penmanship are downright INCOMPREHENSIBLE."

And Bulkhead's like: "You say that like any of us can read yours!"

And Arcee's like: "I second that."

And Bumblebee buzzes in agreement.

Ratchet just rolls his eyes, like "ugh." Because he can't argue. HIS handwriting is gibberish, too.

Ultra Magnus:

-Opposite of Smokescreen...Ultra Magnus's handwriting is TINY!

-Seriously, where is it? You need a microscope.

-Only the humans can read it, because it's so small. And even THEY have to squint

-It's also PERFECT. His handwriting is very neat

and blocky, like a typewriter

-If only we could actually see it

Wheeljack:

-He's like, a graphic design CHAMPION

-He learned handwriting from Miko, so he loves big bubble letters. He decorates them with cool patterns, like flames, and lightning bolts

-Very stylish

Megatron:

-What I can only describe as "spooky cursive"

-Very formal, and kinda gothic

-He'd use some kind of calligraphy pen with very dark, splattery ink, or, like, whatever the Cybertronian version of a quill is.

-He's an elegant guy...well, sort of, except most of what he writes consists of:

"My dearest Starscream,

It is with great regret (note my sarcasm, Starscream.) It is with great PLEASURE that I must inform you...

I have caught you invading my stash of dark energon, once again.

I will be grinding you into scrap metal momentarily.

Yours truly,

Lord Megatron."

Starscream:

-Starscream has the ABILITY to write neatly, and in cursive

-But he writes very scribbly, because he's angry

-If "ranting" was a font, it's the font he writes in

-Also, he probably keeps a rage journal, where he trash talks everyone he knows

-Somebody help him🥲

Soundwave:

-Handwriting? What's that?

-He probably uses his internal computer to make documents, and prints them

-And when he prints things, they probably slide out of his neck. Terrifying. So he prints things to freak Starscream out

-It's beautiful

-If Soundwave was FORCED to handwrite, he'd do it in computer code, or morse code, or something weird like that. Everyone would be baffled trying to understand it.

Airachnid:

-Very splattery

-But that's what happens when you use energon and human blood as ink.

Shockwave:

-Writes in calculator font

-Like, the font a calculator has

-He says it's "the most logical font"

-Starscream constantly judges him for it

Breakdown:

-Definitely not neat, but not Bulkhead levels of messy, either

-He doesn't have the best handwriting, but he can make some pretty good doodles

-If, for some reason, Megatron assigned Breakdown and Knockout a task involving handwriting, Breakdown and Knockout would both doodle instead of being productive

Knockout:

-Ooo! So majestic!

-It's very bold

-His handwriting is suave and announcer-y, just like him

-It'd also be curved slightly to the right, like italics

-Almost like something you'd see in a commercial, or a movie trailer, or a billboard

-Like a NASCAR advertisement (y'know, because race car)

#It would honestly be so funny to watch Cybertronians trying to use a tiny human-sized pencil #having existential crisis over whether Soundwave can be a printer #tfp #transformers prime #tfp headcanons #tfp arcee #tfp optimus prime #tfp bumblebee #tfp ratchet #tfp bulkhead #tfp smokescreen #tfp knockout #tfp starscream #tfp megatron #tfp airachnid #tfp ultra magnus #tfp breakdown #tfp wheeljack #tfp soundwave

[transformersmr-hq]

Couldn't find good Shanix reference so I just made my own

was going to write some robot money headcanons but migraine too stronk so here's the short one

TFMR headcanon - What a bot can buy with each Shanix coins

Brown coin - Energon gumball from a gumball machine, or a dry-ice popsicle from a street vendor

silver coin - cheap everyday items from Rivets Mart(something like Cybertronian Dollar Tree), such as laundry clips, trash bins and so on

Gold coin - A simple meal from cheapest local diner

#maccadam #shanix #blender3D #robot money #3D #procedural texture is free but difficult af #insert bgm-'whales' by hail mary mallon #transformers #transformers: mobius run #want higher resolution but at the same time don't want my dsktop to self destruct #gif

[crying-fantasies]

We'll meet again

Masterlist

"Rod"

"..."

"Please move, I'm getting worried"

"...hm"

"Roddy?"

"Yeah yeah" his ventilation system quicks in, his frame finally giving signals of life, you see at his sides, his pedes, it doesn't seem like he is going to move soon so you take your opportunity and come near him, "I'm online, don't- don't worry"

Most bots are way more delicate when getting near the humans in the ship, always looking where they are going or moving before they acclimate to the tiny lifeforms around, now, Rodimus, is an exception, you've seen him be like this more times than not, half of his body on the berth and the rest on the floor, you don't have to ask anymore, everyone has already told you: "Hot Rod has a problem with high grade" while experiencing it first hand.

Does that stop you from going to him and probably be squeezed under his foot? Not really, you like him, and you want to be with him, even when he keeps on brushing you away when he hits rock bottom again.

"Here", you are holding, dragging, a bag big enough to fit on his servo, full of energon in order to help him get rid of the headach you know is present without asking, this has happened more than once and now you're ready, even encouraging him when he refuses with a whiny sound that puts your nerves on edge, "if you want to feel better then purge that from your system by drinking this".

"You've way too much cruelty on such a tiny body" he finally pleasess you, downing the energon in one go, trying to throw away the bag on the nearest trash deposit in the room, failing by meters and making him groan, covering his face plate with his arms and finally moving along so his back strut could be on the berth properly, "what a pain in the-" ah, he fell to recharge again.

It was best than before, at least, you don't have the power to move him around, way too big for something so squishy as you, there is the option to call out for someone else, but that's out of the question, they would immediately call Thunderclash and while you like and respect your captain to pieces Rodimus has this strange disgust towards him, last thing he would want in the middle of his migraine is to hear or see the captain or, worst, have a reprimand from his part so early in the afternoon, you're sure your captain wouldn't exactly reprimand him but give an inspirational speech, one that Rodimus would still hate with all his soul.

Some people say that what Thunderclash did was the right thing to do, you are grateful, humanity is in verge of extinction, the war has nothing to do with it, no matter how many protestants say otherwise, earth is just changing, faster than before, at first you didn't have any idea of why, no one did, but your captain told you what was really happening and why every new human facilities were topnotch, he expected you all to live fully, happily and without lies on his starship.

Sometimes you wonder if, in these kind of cases, you should talk to him about this, you care for Thunderclash and every bot aboard after all, maybe it would be good to give a few comments here and there on how good it would be to have a grief councilor on the ship, since Rodimus has just got news of the deactivation of a close friend, the memorial ceremony didn't go all that great for what you could guess, he was there just a few minutes and still returned like this.

Still, no matter how good of a mech your captain is, you aren't sure or thrusting enough in how he or anyone could react if any got to ask why you cared for Rodimus so much, you aren't sure if they could really see you two in a good light.

"Roddy" you climb to his face plate, he is recharging so deep and the way cybertronians sleep still scares you because they look dead, only difference is that his derma and armor aren't gray and you feel the pulse of his spark after pressing yourself against his neck cables, it's slow but that is a result of his rest and the unholy amount of liquor on his system, "Rodimus", you climb up as you can, this time you give a little kiss on his intake, where his lips are, and you finally get an answer in the form of a groan and the sound of his ventilation system working properly, "wake up, sleeping beauty".

"What time...?", He raises his servo over his sensible optics, then places it just at your side to give you leverage and prevent any fall if he moves wrong.

"Almost noon" you give a stroke over his cheek, he moves along with it and feel your warm touch on him, it takes a moment to really let your information sink and when it does his ventilators short cut, sitting way too fast but stopping a second before throwing you with his actions and fall back on the berth, he is groaning again, letting you slide slowly when he gets up just to lay again with what you can only assume is pain on his brain processor.

"I'm so sorry", now both servos are over his entire face, you take seat on his neck guard, you know he is being honest, "we're supposed to be on duty now"

"It's fine", he knows it is a lie, you've been talking about sector 3408, the so rumoured floating mountains that can be found there and how incredible would be to take samples of the magnetic rocks that could create such natural phenomena, Rodimus was supposed to be your companion since no human could be let alone out of the ship in an strange planet.

But the pod already left in the morning, and you are still with him.

"It's not, not at all" his tone is getting meaner by the second, he looks mad, it's not at you, but himself, "you should have gone without me"

A movement of your head, a negative, "I don't want to go anywhere without you".

Is it really that strange to feel like this? Maybe, if your family knew, well, there's nothing they could do with you in space, no one can say much, maybe some of your human comrades have noticed something new with you, as for Rodimus, some were happy he was starting to take better care of his physical and inner health, it was showing on his now bright red paint job, rougheout dents fixed up, taking portions of his energon while you took your own rations, ingesting less high grade, until two days ago that's it.

"I'm sorry", maybe he referred to the fact he made you lost the pod, the fact that he is drunk again, that now you have to deal with him and all his problems, "it's my fault", you won't let him go down that spiral of self deprecation and abandon he has fallen into once again, you don't want to hear more of this.

He looks broken, as if all the progress both of you've done so far is now gone, you won't have any of that, "Hey", sometimes this isn't easy, hell, even moving him so you can tal eyes to optics is hard if he doesn't follow, being impossible to move a being so big as him, "there will be new and better things to do up here", he will say something again, something mean you bet, so you do the best that you can and move on your tiptoes to give him a kiss on his partially open intake.

Jokes on you, landing your lips on his front dentae and almost falling face first on his glossa when he goes back, still, it's worth it, to see his optics go all round in surprise before he starts to laugh sincerely at your occurrence and own expense, laughing like a chuckle at first and then go full on almost madness by the second that brings blood rushing to your cheeks by the embarrassment.

Still, you really prefer this, Rodimus laughing from the spark, it's worthy.

"What was that?!"

"My last attempt to be romantic for the day"

"Nooooo~ give me more", his servos raise you once again, just above the start of his helm, what you could call the forehead, "make the pain go away, babe"

"Quit it, you big baby"

Far from stopping his whining he now looks at you with his lips between his dentae, "I love it when you call me that".

Maybe it was fine, spend the rest of the shift here, others won't notice your absence (there isn't really anything else to do), and you can stay with him, protected by the four walls of his habsuit, you only need to get him more energon supplies and giving his tired stabilizers Rodimus still can't get up, "We should get a mattress", is what you say while landing on the hard surface of the berth.

"We can get one in the next stopping point", he doesn't let you go, no so easy, one of his digits is inside the neck of your work uniform and he is tugging at it, "don't leave me alone for too long", it could've been clingy in any other circumstances, but he really needs encouraging words now, his sad and almost offline optics tell you about his vulnerability, his fallen wings of tiredness and his digit clinging to you shout out of his necessity of having you near.

What has happened to such a great bot to be like this? It's not a good question, because he isn't perfect, you also aren't, everyone is broken to some degree, Rodimus has still so much to tell you about him and you have so much to tell about yourself.

"I'll not" you take his digit between your hands, giving it a kiss to give more power to your promise, "I'm not leaving you forever, so wait for the fifteen minutes I'm away".

"You promise?", Just how drunk is he?

"I swear, I'll come back to you"

It's cheesey, it's embarrassing, but those words do get out of your mouth and are apparently all it takes to make a big and childish smile appear on his handsome faceplate, but you mean it, you mean every word and can only wish he heard them right and gets to remember them because you'll need to be drunk to say those words again or accept the way he is looking at you now without feeling strange inside because being so wanted isn't something you are familiar with.

"Me too, I'll always find you"

.

This is a way of ending the story of Rodimus (of course I'll still post the extras), while it's sad how in the main timeline he gets hit hard by his own reality he gets to meet the very same human that in the other reality is his conjunx endurae (the terraformers reality), and maybe in this timeline they'll get to have their happy life for as long as it can last, maybe they could get to meet their own Sunset.

Thanks for this great year, expect for more little pieces while I'm still on my transformers strike, every comment and reblog is appreciated, have a great new year.

#reader insert #x reader #angst #tf mtmte #transformers x reader #transformers #transformers idw #tf rodimus #rodimus x reader #rodimus x human reader #idw rodimus #rodimus prime #rodimus

[yestoeverything]

Ever realize Cybertronian are kinda obsessed with humans like in prime they made like two museums dedicated to earth and humans to.the point where Armstrong from robots in disguised knew about them but I find it funny that it's mostly one sided I just imagine Cybertronians hiding behind a tree watching a random human like:

Bumblebee and the team transformed to their altmode and near a tree/forest, observing humans as bumblebee tried to educate them about humans since they are now ambassadors for cybertron

Bumblebee: "Notice how the humans in the park like to lay fabrics below them while having whats called a "picnic basket" to hold their foods"

Strongarm: "Sir, that's amazing. You know so much about humans.You are like a human whisperer. "

*humans kinda distrubed, ignoring the random cars in the forest, minding their business, eating their sandwhichs*

* After a while, they left some trash, and grimlock just takes the trash for some reason and shows it to fix it and the gang*

* In the future, he shows the rescue cadets, and they save it in their human museum. When Cody passes by it, he realizes it's just a random empty Coca-Cola can and kinda smiles at it*

#maccadam #transformers #tfp #autobots #humans #tfp headcanons #humanity #rescuebots #rescue bots

[aggressively-crying]

Probably bad transformers animated headcanons

Bumblebee listens to 100 gecs and uses TikTok. Both of which he does with his speakers turned up. In public.

Prowl has considered buying a fur suit but stops himself every time he's about to go through with it.

Optimus purposefully misuses slang and memes to watch the crew members that know what the terms mean die inside. Even pronounces them wrong for extra flavor.

Ratchet watches soap operas. It started out as simply being curious as to what trash the humans consider good stories but then he got legitimately invested.

Sometimes Bulkhead tries eating human food just because it looks really really good, but it always inevitably tastes kinda gross because he wasn't meant to process that kind of material. He wants to find a way to convert it to energon but until that day comes, he's forced to simply stare and long for it.

The repair crew has movie nights once a week with Sari, both to get a better understanding of human culture, and as an excuse to hang out. Every once in awhile they accidentally pick a movie that they don't realize Sari probably should not be watching until it's too late. They do not speak of the Friday the 13th incident. Or the time Sari picked Coraline and Optimus had to leave halfway through.

In that vein, after realizing how jumpy he was about spiders on Halloween, Optimus actually tried giving himself a degree of exposure therapy so no harmless tiny arachnids needlessly die by his axe. Now he at least TRIES to bring them outside with a cup and a piece of paper, but he's not above just asking Bulkhead to do it instead.

Ratchet has taken to finding old junker cars and trying to fix them up in his spare time. Their makeup is painfully simple compared to Cybertronian anatomy, and it's not like he has to worry about what happens if he can't fix one fast enough. He still thinks just selling spare parts on the open market is barbaric, but it's kind of therapeutic for him to just work on something like that without the stress of having someone's life or even just general well-being in his hands. He lets Bulkhead repaint them when he's finished.

Sari does NOT actually know how sex works. At least, like, not accurately. The version of it she told to Optimus was wildly off-base, but still juuuust close enough to freak him out.

Similarly, Prowl has observed nature long enough to get a sort of incomplete idea of how all that goes down, and has come to the conclusion that organics universally lay eggs.

Bumblebee plays horror games with the lights off just to prove hes not chicken, and then has horrible nightmares for a week straight. He also fully believes in every video game creepypasta/myth you tell him, and swears up and down he's seen Herobrine.

Bulkhead is terrified of mice because he doesn't understand how anything can be that teeny tiny and he heard they can chew through metal like some kind of freaky organic scraplet. He gets nightmares about Ratchet opening him up and finding a whole colony of them chewing on his wires.

Sometimes while Megatron was just a head in Sumdac's lab, he'd be bored enough watch whatever was on TV between schemes and naps. The only thing he would ever admit he liked was wrestling because he felt at least a little vindication watching the pathetic organic wretches beat the slag out of each other. That and it reminded him a bit of his gladiator days.

Shockwave is a pretentious energon tea drinker and has whatever the Cybertron equivalent of a loose leaf tea infuser is. He INSISTS it's objectively better and whatever the more normie type of energon is simply cannot compare.

Lugnut has date nights with Strika but they usually start off as sparring matches that get juuuust a little out of hand. He would not have it any other way and loves when his big scary wife throws him across the room and into a wall, then immediately rushes over to check if he still functions. It may be the concussions, but he swears she looks like a holy being towering above him from where he's slumped over on the floor.

Blitzwing is actually pretty functional from day to day. He's had his multiple faces for long enough that he knows how to cope with them and work with them. Sometimes he has poor impulse control, and sometimes he can't stop himself from feeding his anger, but overall he's actually pretty good about keeping himself in check. He just leans into the whole "crazy" schtick because he knows that's how others see him and no matter what he does, he's not gonna change their perception. It's sort of a spite thing when he annoys people with it, but it's also kind of a self deprecating cry for help that he's REALLY hoping someone will eventually pick up on.

Starscream is only a Decepticon because he wanted to pursue acting but nobody would hire a Warframe. He sought out fame and adoring fans in the gladiator arena, and he got what he was after until Megatron kicked his skid plate and Starscream was suddenly no longer the popular seeker heartthrob bad boy, but a laughing stock who fell when someone bigger and stronger clipped his wings. He originally joined Megatron with the intent to climb the ranks and snatch his following out from under him, but then the war broke out and his whole plan was thrown off track.

No Cybertronian is 100% okay with Earth vehicles looking the way they do and not being alive. It's pretty creepy seeing what they think is just some guy carrying an organic around only to remember right, yeah, the organic's controlling him like cordyceps in an ant and he was never alive to begin with.

Blurr has to intentionally talk much slower than he would at his natural speaking pace just because nobody can understand what in Primus's name he's saying.

Between him, Jazz and the Jet Twins, it's actually kind of a meme on Cybertron that the elite guard badge messes with your speech synthesizer because Sentinel is the only member that speaks even slightly normally.

Jazz once attempted to show Sentinel a nature documentary that Prowl recommended. Sentinel proceeded to purge his fuel tank about five minutes in and forbid jazz from watching that filth outside his own quarters.

Both of the jet twins play fortnite whenever they're on earth and come up with the nastiest incomprehensible insults they can to spam into the microphone because they think that's just part of the game that nobody is taking seriously rather than unbelievably toxic people having mental breakdowns at losing.

And finally,

Cybertron has its own cryptids and urban legends: a long, serpentine beast, as long as 60 Warframes that slinks through the oil of Iacon's aqueducts. A jet black cybercat with three tails that will take your spark if you look it in the optics for too long. A shuttle painted in neons, appearing at the station on its own when there is only one transformer at the station, speaking honeyed words in a voice that sounds too familiar, and promising to bring you home safe, but keeps driving and never stops until you're in stasis or offline. A spectral figure that haunts the underground tunnels that few dare traverse, keeping to the shadows and darting out of sight, but you can always hear their engine revving, and always hear their anguished wails. A frame-bare mechanical avian, practically skeletal, that circles over the sea of rust, massive in size and always waiting to swoop down on unsuspecting mechs. They are spoken of in hushed whispers, none know for certain whether they are real or simply fiction. Most think it's silly to believe in such things, but the superstitions around them persist.

#transformers #maccadam #tfa #transformers animated #optimus prime #bumblebee #bulkhead #ratchet #prowl #sari sumdac #megatron #blitzwing #lugnut #shockwave #starscream #strika #blurr #jazz #sentinel prime #jetfire #jetstrorm

[heljay]

✨🛻 MAINTENANCE PRIME: A TFA AU Fanzine now available in PDF form on Ko-Fi! 🛻✨

Missed out during TFCon? Don't worry! You can still get your hands on the PDF version by buying it out of my Ko-Fi shop!

Also, if you're still interested in those Edition 2 updates, you can sign up for my Ko-Fi memberships for $3/mo for those! (Though, sadly, you will have to pay for Edition 2 when it releases in full.)

#Transformers Animated #Maccadam #Transformers #Sentinel Prime #Transformers Wasp #Ironhide #TFA #artondorf #Cybertronian Trash

[weenwrites]

Can I please request TFP Shockwave and Dreadwing with a human reader (platonic) who got bored while they were away and made a lot of origami cranes?

Like when they come back, they can't step anywhere without there being a paper crane and even after they clean it up they still find multiple hidden everywhere?

Thanks you 😊!!

[ Please do not repost, plagiarize, or use my writing for AI! Translating my work with proper credit is acceptable, but please ask first! ]

Shockwave

He pays no mind to all the trash you've left on his work-surface, and he brushes it all away without a care. The most he thinks about folding paper is about how it's barely similar to how cybertronians transform their bodies... The main similarity here is the way in which something folds and bends and creases in order to form something else, but of course transformation is much more than just folding over. Still, it's a crude imitation of transformation and it's rather easy for him to figure out, so he doesn't care for your origami cranes in the slightest.

Dreadwing

He initially thought that someone had come along and left a lot of trash in his private quarters as some sort of prank, but upon closer inspection he notices the intricate creases and folds in what seem to be small bits of paper... And if he looks close enough these pieces of paper are crudely folded in the shape of what seems to be an Earth bird...? He's not too sure, Earth has a very, very strange way of defining what's a 'bird' and what isn't.

Regardless of what it is, he asks you to clean up after yourself if you want to keep these... Things you've made. You're friends, and he respects you, he isn't going to mess with your things without your consent or unless it's a serious situation, so you'll be left to clean up your mess unless you don't care to keep them.

He doesn't understand your enthusiasm for folding paper until he's watched you fold a couple more origami cranes. He doesn't assume it's simple, and surely enough he was right. The art of folding paper seems like a much more fascinating thing up close, and to watch a square slip of paper be folded and turned over time and time again in order to be transformed into a crane is a confusing process.

#tfp imagines #tfp headcanons #tfp x reader #tfp shockwave #shockwave x reader #tfp dreadwing #dreadwing x reader #x reader #reader insert #self insert #weenwrites

[ss-shitstorm]

Hey I know you’ve probably already been asked this but what type of chemistry do you use for breaking bread like biochem and where did you learn this or have any book recommendations to pick it up? Also ty in advance I love your writing!!💕💕

oh my fucking god. oh my god. buddy. buddy you have made my fucking LIFE ASKING THIS OH GOD

So like, most of the chemistry I've used so far has just been Genchem and O Chem(with a wee few modifications to make it believable as a Cybertronian discipline, like Transformium being able to hold 4 bonds like Carbon but preferentially forming bonds w metals and needing an EMP pulse to interact w more electronegative atoms) I may wind up needing to get into a bit of Inorganic chemistry, but that's probably fewer and further in between. If you want a better handle on the stuff I'm writing or if you just want to learn more in general, then I'd recommend giving yourself a lil crash course in Genchem and then delving into O chem a bit more extensively (protip : you need WAY less Genchem then you'd think to fully understand O chem. God I wish someone had told me this 5 years ago. If you search "Genchem for non majors", you'll probably learn enough that way.)

THAT SAID : here's a chaotic, not really in any order list of the books/youtube channels/etc that I've directly used/am using for this fic.

Books :

Caveman Chemistry, Kevin R Dunn - Alot of hands-on old timey historical chemistry lessons w detailed instructions on how to complete them.(YOU GET TO MAKE YOUR OWN ASPIRIN AND DRAIN CLEANER!) Delivered with a delightfully occult bend.

Back To basics,(Reader's Digest) - Survivalist homesteading bible. Not strictly chemistry but has alot of earthy hippy ways of generating energy( biofuels my beloved)

An Introduction to Fire Dynamics, Dougal Drysdale - Honestly this, and any other firefighting manuals are worth their weight in gold for figuring out how to not set yourself and your neighborhood on fire while playing with, well, fire. Trying to look this info up online is like playing russian roulette with intentional misinformation and your fbi guy.

(there's another book I have that's even more detailed but I can't find it right now or remember the name. I'll update this list when I can!)

Organic Chemistry, John Mcmurray 8th edition : generic but good college O chem textbook. You can search around and find free versions to download relatively easily.

The Organic Chem Lab Survival Manual, James W Zubrick - Also a very good way to learn how to not set yourself and your neighborhood on fire when playing with glassware/gases. Very in-depth instructions on setting up and using lab equipment without breaking anything or your brain. Has a fuckton of pictures. Author has a massive sense of humor and makes this heavy subject easy to read. Again, easy to download/find in archives

Unfortunately I do not have any recommendations for Genchem books. I mostly used free online courses like Khan Academy to learn what I did.(I would def. recommend them though)

Youtube Channels :

The Organic Chemistry Tutor : Dude puts everything from reaction mechanisms to retrosynth problems down in the simplest possible terms. Does not beat around the bush with euphemisms or stories, gets right to business. If you have trouble paying attention, or lose your mind when a professor goes off on a tangent, this man is your savior. I have crippling unmedicated ADHD and no STEM background whatesoever and this man still managed to teach me 2 separate ways to execute a Gabriel Synthesis

Nile Red : World's most inefficient and most powerful wizard. I am not entirely convinced he's human. Does shit like turning plastic gloves into drinkable grape soda or making sweeteners out of his own piss and somehow makes it explainable to trash goblins like me who only need the science for warlord pussy.

again, anon, holy shit thank you so much. Like you wouldn't believe the amount of damage you've just undone. i have been beating myself into a pulp and spiraling into anxiety about this fic an trying to do everything right and you've given me enough moxie to fuel me for at least the next 10 chapters. If you have any more questions or more specific questions, please do not hesitate to ask! I can't guarantee I can answer them, but damnit I'll try. Take care and happy learning you funky lil moonbean.

#Breaking Bread #megatron #megatron/reader #I know I don't need those tags but lord I'm relishing the thought of ppl stumbling upon this w 0 context #u know what I'ma go ahead and pin this thing. #Took me YEARS just to find out exactly WHAT I needed to learn and WHERE to learn it #if I can save someone from wasting all that time then that'll be nice

[transingthoseformers]

Both Knockout and Breakdown inexplicably smell like vanilla, along with well everything else that comes with robots especially robot aliens.

#okay i meant for this to be a cute little shitpost about kobd #now I'm actually thinking seriously about what Cybertronians and energon would smell like to the human nose #esp. to someone whose olfactory sense is completely trashed #the signature series once compared energon's ''taste'' to coffee and that will always stick with me #but then there's the corrosive aspect to energon i mean corrosive stuff always has a smell #legit i meant this as a cute little thing about Knockout sharing vanilla scented polish with his husband

[moonlight-tmd]

Continuation of Bee' ADHD adventures!

There's this thing where some ADHD folks will do a thing and that thing will turn into a big thing and they done a whole lot more before they realize what happened. ADHD Trance per se.

So one time Team Prime left Bee all alone in base cuz they had to do something and he was supposed to stay at home cuz something- maybe an unhealed injury or Bossbot put him on monitor duty or smthn.

So he was sitting alone in base, Sari also went out to assist them with whatever they were dealing with. The others have been nagging at him about cleaning his room for a while and his processor seemed to not stop bothering him about it just now. So he gave in.

He went to his room and started picking stuff up one by one. It didn't do anything. He dropped it and decided to look for something to entertain himself. He did and he noticed few of his things were not arranged the right way. So he started organizing them. Then noticed another thing that needed proper organization, then another... and one by one he organized everything in his room and cleaned out the trash and things that needed to be thrown out.

But it didn't stop there, there were dirty sticky spots he didn't notice before- that needed cleaning. So he got to cleaning. On the trips to and from his room he noticed other things that needed some care...

When Team Prime and Sari came back they noticed stuff was odd. It was... clean. Then they went into the living room and saw Bumblebee cleaning up some spills and organizing thing on counters/shelves. The music on the tv was playing loud and he was incoherently singing along to it. He didn't react when they called out to him, he didn't even seem to notice they were there. It took Prowl going up to him and grabbing his shoulder to notice- or well, let out a short startled scream, jumping and whipping his helm around to see his team standing near the doorway.

"Oh- You're back quick." He said, slightly embarrased at the scream. "'Quick'? We were gone for 4 hours." Optimus was so confused. And so was Bee. He didn't know this much time has passed.... He was even more confused when they mentioned he was cleaning. Huh? When did he-? Did he do that??

So they looked around- Somehow, Someway, Bee has cleaned up the whole base in the time they were gone. And not only his room was clean, every room that was in use was. Even their rooms- Bulkhead's art supplies were neatly stacked and prepared for work. Prowl's room was swept of fallen leaves, the potted plants were all watered. Ratchet's tools were put away and organized. Optimus' report datapads were organized on his desk- by date moreso! The berths were all made, everything that was dirty was washed and floors swept of dirt. The windows were washed too. Trash was taken out and dishes were done. Heck- Bee even managed to fix few of the minor damages around the building that Ratchet took forever to fix.

He did this all by himself. In less than 4h.

And he didn't even remember doing it.

They were all so confused while Sari was wheezing her ass off about it. So yeah, ADHD Trance has weird effects on cybertronians.

...They should leave Bee alone in base more often.

Anywho, is it obvious that i wrote this from experience just now? No? Good.

Update: i just learned the correct term for it. It's called Hyperfocus.

#maccadam #tfa #tfa bumblebee #tfa shenanigans

[numbbrainstrorm]

My lord I thought of some cybertronian insults Pt. 1 ( they might already exist { I don't really pay much attention to others / what the bubbles in comics say}sorry ]

You lack of quality: imagine being so bad at fighting (being a war machine) that somebody calls you a lack of quality. What they mean is that the sentient metalico could've been used on building a better mech ( Feels like an attack on Missfire)

You scrap head : carries the same weight as a You IDIOT

You belong in a scrap yard : do I need to?you trash

That scrap pile looks better than you : attack on looks (not cool)

You left winged jet: jokes on you they ARE left winged ( left handed) - took it from my mother language ( máš obe nohy ľavé) It's an insult for being clumsy - only for seekers

Give me a minute I can think of more! ( definitely.)

#transformers #maccadam #mtmte #lost light #Somebody request something I'm bored af and I don't want to continue / start something serious #My Brains so numb smh