#Glad it's been added to the list because I want to read it so bad lol

[morallygreyyn]

can we get a second part to do your duty pls?? not even just for the smut, i wanna see the reader grow soft for our boy <3

do your duty (omega!illumi x alpha!reader) (part 2)

description: omegaverse au where after you, a wealthy highborn, presented as an alpha, your parents immediately arranged for your marriage to illumi zoldyck, an omega, when you both came of age. as you began to resent the idea over the years, you had no idea that the allegedly haughty and indifferent illumi had begun to feel the opposite…

authors note: this is my favourite fic that i've ever written, no question. part 2 has been sitting in my drafts for just under a year at this point but i'm so glad i'm finally posting it

this fic will be turned into a full story very very soon (i've started writing it) so if you would like to be tagged when it's posted, please lmk! i'm so excited to be writing it as it gives a lot more depth to this fic that i randomly wrote one day because i was reading too much of the omegaverse genre - enjoy!

warnings: same as the last fic

word count: 7.6k (not proofread we die like men).

tag list (adding the people who commented on my last fic so sorry if you didn't want to be tagged!): @justyanderes @laylasbunbunny @expectroyalpurple @ladies-man217 @nai2fly

read part one here

requests are open! please read my rules!

You stood at the altar, fidgeting with your formal black attire. Surprisingly, you weren’t nervous, just more impatient to get this wedding over and done with. You couldn’t wait to get away from your family, from your intended family, from the prying eyes and expectations. Even if you had to drag Illumi away with you, it wasn’t all bad. At least he would also be somewhere he was appreciated.

His wedding necklace lay on an embroidered pillow, waiting to be clamped around the omega’s neck. It was a tradition within rich families for the alpha to claim their omega with a collar during the wedding ceremony, and a bite to the neck during the honeymoon. Any omega with both the necklace and mark was considered untouchable to other alphas.

A ridiculous tradition but one your families insisted on.

You took in your surroundings with a disinterested gaze. It seemed a wedding of this scale was bound to have a large audience. All of your close and distant family were sitting on one side of the aisle, your bride’s family on the other. You could see Illumi’s younger siblings sitting next to Kikyo and Silva, all dressed in their finest. Killua, the obvious family favourite and the heir to their fortune, was sitting between his parents looking for all the world as if he’d like nothing more than to leave. The rest of Illumi’s siblings wore similar expressions, with the exception of Alluka who just looked happy to be somewhere that wasn’t her house. 

You had only a couple of brief interactions with your soon to be in-laws, but from what you could gather, it seemed all of the Zoldyck siblings had a screw loose. Being the eldest, you supposed Illumi had to bear the burden of each of his siblings and all of their unique oddities. Then again, it appeared as though your bride was perhaps the strangest of them all.

When the music started, your heart gave a minute jump. Perhaps you were nervous after all. Turning to face the doors at the opposite end of the aisle, you watched as they pulled apart, revealing your bride. One look at him was enough to knock the breath out of your lungs. 

He was wearing white, forced by his family no doubt, and his pale skin almost matched the tone of the fabric. It was an impressive garment, truly fit for a bride of his calibre. His trousers, while tailored perfectly to his long and slim frame, were paired with an almost translucent, billowing shirt that flowed like water with each slight movement. Attached to the shoulders of his shirt was a matching sheer cape with gold and emerald details embroidered from the hem, branching upwards. 

Turning your attention upwards, you noticed that his admittedly gorgeous long hair was coiled into a bun at the nape, with large gold needles holding it in place. An odd accessory to choose but it didn’t stand out as peculiar.

Illumi looked as if he was an omegan fairytale prince that alpha knights would slay dragons for. You wanted to laugh at the thought that his family was the dragon and your wedding attire was armour. Your wedding ring that was currently lying on a cushion could be your sword. 

Focusing your attention back on your bride, you watched as Illumi’s eyes scanned the room, stopping briefly on his family. It didn’t take a genius to guess what he was thinking. Once his eyes found yours, they didn’t leave your gaze. You tried to give him a small smile in hopes to quell any fears he may or may not be feeling. If there was one thing to come from this marriage, it was that your bride had nothing to fear from you.  

The music started up again, and Illumi made his walk down the aisle. He kept his head held high, portraying almost an aura of royalty. All eyes in the audience were on him and you knew he didn’t want to embarrass his family, so with his gaze firmly locked on you, he soldiered on past the people who raised him and headed straight towards where you waited. 

It didn’t take long for Illumi to climb the steps that lead to the altar and soon enough, he had joined your side. You couldn’t believe he looked even more breathtaking up close.

“You look beautiful.” You murmured, low enough that he was the only one who heard. Illumi, to no one's surprise, didn’t reply. He just quietly stood beside you, surveying the venue. His scent was stronger today, no doubt a side effect of his upcoming heat. It was difficult to maintain a composed exterior when all you wanted to do was bury your face into his neck and drink in as much of the heady scent as you could. 

This was going to be an incredible test of your self control.

On cue, Silva stood from his place in the audience and approached the vacant spot beside Illumi.

The minister approached the altar then, standing before the two of you. “Who gives this omega to this alpha?”

“I, Silva Zoldyck, give my son, Illumi, to this alpha.” Taking the omega’s hand, your soon to be father-in-law placed it in your waiting one. Ignoring the coldness of his fingers, you gently squeezed Illumi’s hand. Silva, having done his part, made his way back to his seat.

“Kneel omega and be brought under the alpha’s protection.”

Illumi dropped to his knees before you, cape and shirt fluttering as he lowered his head to expose his nape. Picking up the glorified collar and feeling the weight of it in your hands, you almost considered walking out then and there. If Illumi was to wear this everyday, surely he’d have neck problems before the year ended. However as everyone was watching, you didn’t even have time to pause. Your fingers brushed over the soft skin of his neck, and clamped the necklace into place, and if your fingers lingered longer than necessary, no one was able to tell. Nobody apart from one.

Illumi rose once you pulled away, his expression betraying nothing of his feelings, if he was feeling anything at all that is. His hand quickly fluttered to brush the foreign object around his neck, feeling its cold, emerald encrusted exterior. At least the green suited him.

It was customary for the omega to wear that necklace in public and you began to hate the stupid tradition that your families were determined to uphold. The saving grace was that Illumi would be yours, and therefore he wouldn’t be subject to anything he didn't want anymore. If your families wanted to follow tradition, then they couldn’t ignore the one that states that the omega belongs to their alpha before anyone else. Not even the Zoldycks themselves had the power that the spouse, now you, holds.

“May all people present today be witness to the union of y/n l/n and Illumi Zoldyck. Today it is their wish, and the will of their families, for them to be joined as one. One heart, one body, one mind, one soul.” The minister paused, and you felt the gravity of the situation sink in. This was really happening. Your fate, that was organised for you so many years ago, the one you thought you could outrun, had finally caught you. The minister turned to you then, not giving you a moment to lament your situation. “Do you, y/n l/n, take this omega to be your lawfully wedded wife and mate? Will you love him, comfort him and protect him? Will you honour and keep him, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?”

“I do.”

“Do you, Illumi Zoldyck, take this alpha to be your lawfully wedded husband and mate? Will you love them, comfort them and abide by them? Will you honour and obey them, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to them as long as you both shall live?”

“I do.”

A small part of you was surprised at the utter lack of hesitation in Illumi’s response.

“May the alpha please stand before the omega and pronounce your vows.”

Taking a breath, you turned to face your bride. You didn’t need a sheet as you had thankfully memorised the vows you had written. Truthfully, you had much different vows a few days prior, however last night had you hastily scribbling new ones as you reeled from the events. 

“I, y/n, take you, Illumi, to be my omega and these are my vows to you that I shall uphold until my last breath. I promise to put you first above all others, your needs and wants will always be a top priority to me. I vow to never turn you away or reject you. I promise to care for and protect you, and to always take your side should you need me to. I will always honour you and you will never be alone as I am now a part of you, just as you are now a part of me. Till death do us part.”

Illumi’s already wide eyes seemed to have opened slightly wider at your words, if that were possible. Perhaps he didn’t expect those vows to be made to him, or didn’t expect the sincerity behind them. Either way, it appeared as though a light flush was creeping up his neck though you couldn’t be sure due to the makeup that expertly covered his skin.

“May the omega stand before the alpha and pronounce your vows.” 

Illumi didn’t have a sheet of paper either and you wondered if he had memorised his too. Then you questioned who exactly wrote his vows because you were sure his family would’ve had some input as to what he was supposed to promise.

“I, Illumi, take you, y/n, to be my alpha and these are my vows to you.” It was almost uncomfortable looking into the omega’s eyes as he began reciting his vows, it felt as though these were for your ears alone and all others present in the room were unwelcome. 

You almost missed what he said as you were too shocked at what was happening. Your omega was promising to obey you, care for you, provide support where you needed it, and all you could focus on was the frantic race of your heart. How ironic that you needed support now at this moment. 

You gave him a small smile once he had finished, providing some proof that you had been paying attention. Something had shifted in his eyes, they looked slightly less lifeless.

“Does anyone present today reject the union of these two souls?” Not a single sound could be heard and you didn’t expect to find yourself relieved, but you couldn’t deny that you were. The minister then asked for the rings, signalling that your ceremony was coming to a close and so was your free life. Though you could argue that it was never free to begin with.

“With this ring, I thee wed.”

“With this ring, I thee wed.” You repeated, swiftly slipping the wedding ring onto his slender finger, giving his cold hands a light squeeze. You weren’t sure, but you imagined he squeezed back. Then Illumi repeated the same steps, sliding your metaphorical sword onto your finger.

Your fate was sealed. Staring at your new wife, you struggled to comprehend the complex emotions that were surging through you.

“By the authority vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife, y/n and Illumi l/n!” Then the minister turned to you, shaking you out of your shock at hearing Illumi having your surname for the first time. You had forgotten about that part. “You may now kiss your bride.”

Illumi closed his eyes and waited, and you realised with a start that he was following your instructions from the night before. Immensely glad that you had already practised, you couldn’t help the small smile as you pressed your lips against his. All the kisses you previously shared flashed through your mind and it was almost impossible to keep it as a chaste kiss, you wanted very much to explore the omega’s mouth the way you did last night. By some miracle, you managed to restrain yourself as sophisticated applause rang out throughout the venue.

Hand in hand, you both turned to face your now joined families. You could feel Illumi’s fingers warming under your touch as you both gazed out at the families who had forced you into this situation. Surprisingly, you felt as though you had gained some power rather than having lost some like you had previously expected. You glanced over at your wife who was looking at his family, something deeper lingering in his usual blank stare. You could only begin to understand what he must be feeling right now. Giving his hand a reassuring squeeze, you smiled slightly as he turned to face you.

“We made it.” You whispered as your family ushered you outside the venue to meet the photographer who was in charge of your wedding photos.

Illumi nodded, seemingly unable to find his voice. Subconsciously, you felt yourself grip his hand tighter as you were both suddenly caught up in the drama of arranging family members for the photos.

“Now time for the newlyweds, alone.” The photographer said after what felt like a thousand clicks of the camera, waiting until your surrounding family members filed out of his shot. 

Noticing that there was a slight gap between you, you gently pulled the omega towards you. You could feel Illumi jump slightly at the arm you wrapped around his thin waist.

“Sorry.” You murmured, stepping closer to him like the photographer asked. 

“It’s okay.” He replied, not looking away from the lens. 

Unsatisfied with that response, you leaned to whisper in his ear. “If ever you’re uncomfortable with me touching you, please let me know.” 

“I’m not uncomfortable.” It seemed as though Illumi wanted to say more, but he restrained himself for reasons unknown to you.

Unwilling to pry, you left it there. “If you’re sure.” 

A couple clicks of the camera later, the photographer still seemed unsatisfied with the results. 

“Maybe we’re not photogenic enough for him.” You mused, watching with humour as the man fiddled with the focus.

“Or he needs a new lens.”

Chuckling, you turned to face your new wife, photos be damned. You hadn’t expected your wife to be funny, albeit unintentionally. 

Illumi turned his head to look at you, lips parted ever so slightly, seemingly shocked by your reaction to something he said. Perhaps no one had ever given him the reaction you just had.

Just then you heard the click of a camera, the photographer's astounded voice following soon after. “That looks perfect! We’re finished!”

Without getting the chance to breathe a sigh of relief, you both were then ushered into a side room to fill out your marriage paperwork while the guests made their way back to your family estate where the reception was to be held. You didn’t even get to utter a word to your new wife as you were both relentlessly hounded into signing sheet after sheet of paperwork by the administrator. Barely having time to process what you were signing, you took what felt like your first breath once you left the room and headed outside. 

Illumi diligently followed, matching your steps in silence, heels clicking as he walked.

“I’m amazed you even made it down the aisle wearing those.” You commented, looking at those injury promising shoes.

“They’re not as high as some shoes mother wears.”

“Really?”

Illumi hummed in response, watching as you opened the car door for him. Quickly making sure his attire didn’t get caught underneath him or in the car door, you closed the door and swiftly got into the driver's seat. Pulling away from the venue, you begrudgingly turned onto the main road that would take you home for the reception.

“Maybe now’s the time to run away.” You grumbled after a while, breaking the tense silence between the two of you.

“Why would we do that?”

“Do you really want to spend an evening with our families with us as the centre of attention?” Feeling like it was necessary, you took his empty hand into your free one.

“Not particularly.” Turning away from the window, he stared at your interlocked hands and then at you. “Where would we go?”

Happy your bride was playing along, you cast him a mischievous glance. “Hmm, let’s see. Somewhere far away, preferably warm too. Does anywhere come to mind?”

Illumi shook his head. “I’ve never been anywhere other than my home and yours so I wouldn’t know where to go.”

“Then that makes running away an even greater adventure.” You squeezed his hand and then brushed your thumb over his knuckles. “Perhaps a beach resort on a far away island, or a cabin nestled in mountain woodland? Or how about a skyscraper hotel in a bustling city? Or a cruise ship that takes us to famous tourist spots all over the world?”

Illumi blinked, looking a smidge shocked at all of the options you were suggesting. “All of them.”

“All of them it is.” You laughed, giving him a rare, genuine smile and to your utter bafflement, he offered a small one in return. 

You almost stopped the car. Never in a million years did you think your bride had the capability to smile but here he was. Granted, it was barely there, a mere tug at the corners of his lips, but it was there nonetheless. 

Careful not to break the mood, you pretended you weren’t floored by his expression and went back to discussing becoming runaways. Before long and before you were ready, you pulled up to your manor.

You sighed, wishing you could put the many plans you made in the car into action. “Are you ready for this?”

“It’s only a couple of hours.” He nodded, looking out of the window to the unavoidable party that awaited you. “Then we’ll be on our honeymoon.”

“Our first grand escapade.” You chuckled as you got out of the car, ignoring the fact that you’d have to deal with Illumi’s heat for a portion of it. You circled around the vehicle and opened the door for your new wife. Taking his hand, you helped him stand in those treacherous looking high heels. 

Once he was standing, it was only then that you noticed the proximity. Face inches away, Illumi’s flat gaze was locked on yours. 

“Screw them, they can wait another five minutes.” Wrapping an arm around his waist, you pulled Illumi in for a much less innocent kiss than the one you gave him at the altar. 

You supposed that his upcoming heat was to blame for his whisper of a whine. Nonetheless, it spurred you on. However it was only a couple of seconds later before Illumi pulled away, though it seemed with poorly veiled reluctance.

“We need to go inside.” 

Groaning, you dropped your head onto his shoulder, unable to help yourself from breathing in more of that addictive scent. “It’s not too late, we can still jump in the car.”

“We can later.”

Begrudgingly, you lifted your head and held out your hand. "Let’s get this over with then.”

Nodding, your bride quickly took your hand and you both made your way inside. The sound of applause was the first thing that greeted you, choruses of congratulations rang out from the many guests in attendance.

“There they are!” Your father announced, approaching you with the rest of your beaming family in tow. Illumi’s family also made their way in front of you, looking a little relieved that you had actually gone through with the wedding.

“You’re just in time for the banquet.” Your mother ushered the two of you through the halls and outside to the grounds which had been turned into a wedding reception fit for royalty. 

Extravagant tents had been pitched with many tables and chairs for all your guests situated underneath. Strings of warm fairy lights hung from the ceiling, mixed with garlands of flowers. There was even a dance floor and a couple of chandeliers.

Taking your seats at the head table, you watched as everyone else found their places. Your parents sat at the same table as you, yours on your side and Illumi’s on his. It didn’t take long for everyone to be seated, however you did find it a bit funny that some people were hidden due to the giant bouquets adorning every table.

“Attention please.” Your mother called and almost immediately there was silence. “I would like to give a huge congratulations to y/n and my new son in law, Illumi. We welcome you with open arms into this family and wish you a very happy marriage. With that, I’d like us all to raise a toast to the newlyweds. To y/n and Illumi l/n!”

You didn’t think you’d ever get used to hearing that. Absently, you wondered what Illumi thought of his new name.

The banquet was a boring affair. Multiple dishes were put in front of you, each more elaborate than the last. Buzzing chatter from the attendees filled the air, even your parents eagerly chatted to the Zoldycks. It seemed as if you and your omega were the only silent ones. 

Determined not to be the odd ones out at your own wedding, you turned to Illumi, making sure to keep your voice low so you couldn’t be overheard. “So, have you thought anymore about where you’d like to go?”

The omega looked at you, seemingly happy enough to be speaking with you and not part of the larger conversation that was happening at your table. “I keep trying but I can’t picture anything.”

“That’s probably because you don’t know what you like yet.” You tapped your chin in mock sympathy. “I’m afraid there’s only one cure for that.”

“What’s that?”

You grinned. “We have to keep travelling until you do know.”

“Okay.” Illumi nodded, apparently liking the sound of your suggestion. 

Toasts came after the food and you all but blacked out during most of the speeches, most being the same with well wishes, future children, and inheritance. It was decided before, with heavy backing on your part, that neither you or Illumi would have to make a speech. You said everything that needed to be said in front of family during your vows. Anything else was for your bride’s ears only.

You leaned towards him, lips almost touching his ear. “Was that as boring for you as it was for me?”

Your wife agreed with a bob of his head. “They were all the same.”

“I guess money and children is all we’re good for.” You joked humourlessly, hating the truth to it. “How I would hate to disappoint them.”

“You sound as though you would love nothing more.”

Laughing lightly, you smiled mischievously at Illumi. “Perhaps I would.”

You were brought out of your scheming by your father announcing that the banquet was over and it was time for the first dance. 

Groaning internally, you took Illumi’s hand and led him to the centre of the dance floor. You could not only feel your nerves, but you imagined you could feel his too. Dancing? Neither of you had practiced that. Granted, you should’ve expected to dance at your own wedding, but in your defence, you didn’t want to think about it much until today. Vaguely remembering the ballroom dance lessons your mother insisted you take in your younger years, you somehow managed to get both you and your bride into position.

“Do you know what you’re doing?” He whispered as you both waited for the music to start.

“Not a clue, I’m just going with it.” You could see Illumi’s shoulders oddly relax at your words and once the music started, you guided him around the dance floor. Stiff in the beginning, you both began to get the hang of it more and more and soon enough, you were both gliding across the floor. You even chanced it by spinning you both around, Illumi’s cape swirling around you like a ripple of water. 

Once the music stopped, everyone applauded and joined you on the dance floor as the music started up again in a continuous loop.

“Looks like we survived.” You panted, struggling to regain your breath. You were only stepping together now, both coming down from the extravagant display you put on.

“Somehow.” Illumi looked at your joint hands, seemingly lost in thought. However, just when you were about to ask, your mother cut in.

“It’s time for the parent dances.”

Ah, you had forgotten that you would be dancing with your mother, and Illumi with his father. Reluctant to let go, you suppressed a sigh and you took your mother’s hand and guided her around the dance floor. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Illumi watching you leave until his father approached. 

“It looked like those dance lessons you took came in handy.” Your mother remarked, pleased to be proven right. “I told you they would and yet you still complained.”

“Yes mother, thanks to you I didn’t make a bumbling fool of myself and my bride.”

She hummed and her smug expression stayed in place for a while until it dropped abruptly. 

“It will be a lot quieter without you now.” Her voice was softer, as if she had just realised that she was losing her child today. “Take good care of your omega, we’re quite high maintenance. It takes a lot to keep us happy.”

Actually smiling, you kissed your mother’s cheek. While your family did many things that you disagreed with, your mother wasn’t entirely bad all of the time. “Just say you’ll miss me and be done with it.”

She didn’t hesitate to playfully smack the upside of your head before giving you a serious, pointed look. “Just make sure his needs are met.”

Ah, so she also knew about how Illumi was raised. “I will.”

“I know you will, I raised you right.” She spoke proudly. “Also, I know where you’re going for your honeymoon.”

Neither you or Illumi knew where you were going so it came as a shock for your mother to bring it up so soon. “You do? Where is it?”

“Of course I do, I’m the one who organised it.” She smiled at your eager expression. “We have the family run beach resort which you seem to have forgotten about.”

“The beach resort? As in the island beach resort a couple of miles out to sea?” You stared at her, flashing back to your hopeful conversation in the car a couple of hours ago.

“The very one.”

A whole month by the beach, on an island, away from your families. You couldn’t have asked for anything more than that. “Illumi will be overjoyed to hear that.”

“Will he? I never know what that boy is thinking.”

You laughed, understanding that feeling all too well. “Neither do I but I better start figuring it out.”

“Yes, you should.” Suddenly her gaze shifted past your shoulder. You followed her gaze to where your father stood at the edge of the tent, beckoning you over. “Your father wants to speak to you.”

“This can’t be good.”

“Regardless, don’t forget what I said.” Your mother smoothed your attire, looking more lost than you’d ever seen her in your life. “You did so well, I’m so incredibly proud of you.”

You were frozen, unable to comprehend the words you had never heard directed at you throughout your whole life. “You are?”

“Of course. Look at the responsible alpha you’ve become, how could I not be?” She kissed the top of your forehead before letting you go. “Don’t forget about me in this new chapter of your life, okay? Feel free to take me and your bride out shopping any time.”

Laughing once, you bid your mother goodbye before making your way over to your less favourable parent. 

“Father.” You greeted, walking with him out of the tent and onto the grounds. It was night now which made the fairy lights seem all that more inviting. 

“Y/n, I trust you’re enjoying your wedding.” 

“I am.” You were surprised that your response wasn’t a total lie.

“And your bride?”

“Is probably enjoying it just as much. Speaking of, I haven’t seen him in a while so if you’ll excuse me I should probably get back to him.”

Before you could make your getaway, your father spoke again. “One moment.”

“Yes?” You feigned politeness through gritted teeth.

“After your honeymoon, I expect news of an heir.”

“What?” Somehow, you had almost forgotten about that crucial part. How stupid of you. 

“You will do your duty to this family and put an alpha child in that omega as soon as possible.”

Oh you didn’t like his tone one bit. 

“That omega is now my wife and therefore a part of this family. You will show him respect.” You couldn’t hold back the sneer if you tried. The way he spoke about your omega had you seeing red. “I will put a child in him if he so wishes and he does, so rest assured, our family will have heirs.”

Your father made a move to reply but you cut him off before he could. “Also, his name is Illumi and he’s now your son-in-law.”

You didn’t bother sticking around to see your father’s face, and you quickly retreated to where you knew you could be alone for a moment. Slipping away from the reception and into the manor, you successfully made it to your room. Throwing open the doors to the balcony, you had a wonderful view of your wedding reception which you had abandoned. Closing your eyes, you quietly listened to the sound of the merriment that you couldn’t bring yourself to be a part of.

Surprisingly, it hadn’t been all bad. You had even enjoyed some parts of your wedding. It was just a shame that your father had to bring you crashing back down to earth. 

A child? You weren’t sure you were ready for that just yet. There were still so many things you wanted to do that would become a lot more difficult if you had a child to worry about.

You spent a few minutes wallowing until the sound of heels could be heard approaching from the hall.

“Y/n?” A muffled voice called from behind the door, the only one you wouldn’t turn away.

“Out here, Illumi.” The door to your room pushed open and your bride stood in the doorway, looking at you with that same unreadable expression.

He slowly made his way into your room, drawing closer to you. “Why are you hiding?”

“My father was getting on my nerves.” You admitted, resting your forearms against the railing. “They’re already hounding me about putting an ‘alpha baby’ in you.”

He nodded, as if that made complete sense to him. “I need to produce heirs.”

“No.” You shook your head, hating that your mate was brainwashed into thinking that bearing children was his duty. “You’re mine now. You don’t have to answer to them anymore, not if you don’t want to.”

“I know, I obey you.”

“Not if you don’t want to, Illumi.”

“I want to, I made a vow.”

“A vow your family wrote no doubt.”

“I wrote my own vows.” He whispered, as if unsure he should be revealing this information.

Baffled, you turned to face him with wide eyes. “You did?”

“My parents checked over them, but yes.”

“Then why did you write that one?”

“Because I want to obey you.” You were so sure he’d leave it there, but to your shock, Illumi kept speaking. “You’re my alpha and someone who has my best interests in mind.”

He moved to stand beside you, heels clicking against the marble flooring. 

“And that's a good enough reason to obey my every word?”

“I also know you’ll put me and our future children first.”

You snorted. “Still not seeing how this adds up.”

Then your omega did something you never expected to happen twice in a lifetime, let alone twice in one day. Giving you a small, half smile, you had to strain your ears to hear his soft whisper. “I know that you’ll never do anything to harm me.”

It was obviously quite challenging for Illumi to say such a thing as his expression quickly shifted back into one of indifference, but for a brief fleeting moment, you felt as though you had cracked through his impenetrable armour. It was clear that his parents didn’t care for their oldest child, and you wondered to what extent did that mental, emotional and physical abuse scar the boy before you. Being touch starved was about the extent of your knowledge and you shuddered to think about what other things your mate must be dealing with.

You nodded, unable to stop yourself from wrapping your arm over his shoulders and bringing the omega into your side. “You’ll always be safe with me. I'll take care of you.”

You couldn’t stop the mushy words from leaving your mouth even if you tried. You supposed it was the injustice he had faced, you couldn’t help but want to shield him from it all. Perhaps you really were a knight in shining armour come to save the prince.

“Will you?” His voice was quieter than you had ever heard it before. Maybe his upcoming heat was affecting him more than he let on? If this is what he was like before his heat, you wondered with abject fascination at what he would be like during.

Hooking a finger under his chin, you tilted his head up. Once your eyes locked, you gave your bride a lopsided grin. “I made a vow.”

Illumi took a sharp intake of breath, an uncertain hand slowly coming up to rest on your one. You caressed his cheek, unable to stop yourself from marvelling at his unique beauty. It still hadn’t settled in yet that this was your wife. He now bore your last name. He was your omega. Illumi was yours. Yours.

Perhaps his heat was starting to affect you too. 

You could feel Illumi leaning into your touch, as if he was desperate for it. You could also sense his hesitation, unsure what to do with the attention he was receiving, clearly not used to it like an omega should be. You would be sure to fix that. It may take several years, and perhaps all the damage done could never be erased, but you would try your very best to help him through it. Your own private vow to him that didn’t need hundreds of witnesses to hear it. Just one was enough.

“From now on, if you ever feel like you need me for anything, don’t hesitate to ask, okay? Even the smallest of things.” You whispered as you leaned in, unable to bear the thought of someone overhearing. “I promise, I will always be by your side to help you through it.”

Guiding his chin upwards, you brought your lips to his. It was meant to be a simple reassurance kiss however when Illumi so eagerly opened his mouth for you, all innocent notions flew out the window, so to speak. Pulling Illumi flush against your body, you deepened the kiss. 

He desperately clutched the front of your shirt, as if you were some kind of lifeline. You could feel yourself doing the same, your grip tightening around his waist, ensuring there was no gap between you. You couldn’t explain how you felt, even if you tried. 

From not wanting to be married and pretending as if your bride didn’t exist, to wanting nothing more than him being safe in your arms; your emotions were almost giving you whiplash. 

But you didn’t have time to focus on that, not when Illumi was making breathy little moans in your mouth. His whines and whimpers, while still quiet, were a little more audible today. Another side effect of his heat. 

Before you both passed the point of no return, you reluctantly broke away. “We better go back down.”

“Can we stay up here for a while longer?” Came a barely audible response, as though he was daring to ask for something unattainable, something he wasn’t allowed.

You were shocked he would even suggest such a thing. “Why?”

He hesitated, unwilling to say too much.

“Illumi?” You tried catching his gaze, wanting to know what thoughts he was locking away. “What’s wrong?”

“You might be stolen away again.” You could’ve sworn his grip on your shirt tightened. “I...”

“What?”

“I don’t want that.”

You would have laughed at the situation if it weren’t for your new wife finally showing some vulnerability. Perhaps his heat was a considerable factor in why he wasn’t as tight-lipped. “Are you possessed?”

“No, I think my heat is already affecting me.” Bingo.

“Ah, so you’ll say what you really think only when you’re about to go into a heat cycle. Got it.” You teased, shooting him a half grin. “Don’t fret, you’re the only one I want to dance with anyway.”

He caught your gaze then, almost too innocent with the way his flat eyes locked with yours. “Really?”

You smiled, resting your forehead against his. “You’re my bride and this is our wedding. Of course you are.”

“Oh.” Came his response. 

You stroked his cheek, loving the way he subconsciously leaned into your touch. “Just a couple more minutes then.”

Standing behind him, you wrapped your arms around Illumi’s narrow waist and looked out at the festivities below. 

“Honestly,” You whispered after a couple moments of silence. “This wasn’t nearly as bad as I was expecting. Even dancing with my mother was somewhat enjoyable.”

“I enjoyed dancing with you.” Illumi’s voice matched yours. “Even if you are terrible at it.”

“I’m not that bad! I got us through it, didn’t I?”

“I suppose.”

“You suppose.” You huffed, resting your head on Illumi’s. “How does it feel now that your surname isn’t Zoldyck anymore?”

“It feels weird.” He paused, considering his words. “But not in a bad way.”

“Weird in a good way? You’re happy to have my last name?”

“Yes.”

“Huh.” You didn’t want to say how happy that made you. You didn’t even know the reason why. “Nice.”

Illumi let out a breath that almost resembled a laugh.

“You seem a lot less guarded today.”

“Would you prefer me the other way?” He seemed to ask this honestly, as if he truly wanted to know.

“Absolutely not, I’m quite happy with you like this.”

“I see.”

You left it at that, closing your eyes and feeling the summer breeze that carried the sound of festivities with it. An odd sense of calmness washed over you, one you hadn’t expected to feel in this situation but it was welcome nonetheless. Illumi seemed a lot less rigid in your arms, as though he had finally found a safe place where he could finally, finally let the mask fall.

Maybe you could get used to this after all. 

“We really need to go back down there now.” You sighed after a couple of minutes that felt more like seconds, not really wanting this quiet moment to end. 

“I suppose we must.” Illumi didn’t move from his position in your arms, nor did you make any effort to remove them.

You chuckled and finding the will to step away, you held out your hand to your new wife, offering him a rare genuine smile. “Let’s rejoin the celebrations. We are the main event after all.”

Heading back downstairs and outside, it was almost as if you had never left at all. The celebrations were still in full swing by the time you spun Illumi back onto the dance floor. As promised, you held on tightly to your omega and didn’t even consider dancing with anyone else who wasn’t him. 

A couple of songs had passed before you remembered your previous conversation with your mother. “Oh, I know where we’re going for our honeymoon.”

“Where?”

“It’s a surprise.”

“It’s not a surprise if you know.”

“I meant it’s a surprise for you.”

“But I want to know.”

“You’ll know soon enough.” You chuckled, spinning your bride before pulling him back in. “But I can give you a hint.”

“Please tell me where it is.”

It was incredibly difficult not to tell him then and there, but you held firm to your silly little game. “One hint, take it or leave it.”

He huffed slightly, giving in to your ridiculous behaviour. “Fine, what’s the hint?”

“I mentioned it earlier today in the car.”

“But you mentioned hundreds of places.” He protested and you could almost see a slight pout forming.

“Mhm, you did say you wanted to try them all.” 

“How am I supposed to narrow it down?”

Your grin turned evil. “You’re not.”

Before he could retort, you pulled Illumi in for a kiss. Smiling at the small noise of surprise he made, you quickly pulled away again. Your good mood soured when you noticed who was getting closer to where you were.

“It’s almost time for you to leave for your honeymoon.” Your new mother-in-law approached, giving you a warm smile before turning to her son. “You must change before you go, follow me.”

“I’ll see you soon.” You whispered to him, placing the ghost of a kiss against his cheek before he was whisked away to change into more suitable travel attire. Your only issue was that Illumi was to be alone with his mother and who knows what sort of nonsense she was going to fill his head with. At least you’d be able to rebuke it now. 

You also quietly slipped away to get changed. Having previously set out travel clothes the night before, it didn’t take long until you were back under the fairy lights waiting for your omega. You passed the time talking to some distant relatives, only partially listening to the conversation as you eagerly counted down the seconds until you could leave. You didn’t have to wait long until Illumi returned, side by side with his mother, in flowy clothes, save for his wedding necklace, that seemed a lot more comfortable than what he was wearing a few moments prior. 

You watched him as his disinterested gaze scanned the crowd, actively seeking you out. Watched him as he spotted you and looked for all the world as though he wanted nothing more than to run to your side. Before he could move towards you however, his mother caught him by the arm and whispered something harshly in his ear. Illumi nodded and pulled away.

“What was that about?” You asked when he approached, automatically wrapping an arm around his waist. 

He just shook his head, clearly unwilling to give the details now. You made a mental note to ask later. 

Car packed and ready to go, you were ushered towards the driveway by the rest of your family. Clapping and cheering filled the night as you helped your bride into the car, and finally pulled away from the place you called home. 

It was an odd feeling, driving away from your childhood manor to start a new life. Granted, it wasn’t one you had chosen but something told you it wasn’t bad. Sneaking a glance at Illumi, you decided that perhaps this was almost something you would have wanted for yourself, without the family duty aspect.

“Can I get another hint?” Illumi broke the silence first, seemingly thinking very hard about where you were driving to.

You laughed at his helpless tone as you turned onto the main road that would take you to the docks. “Fine, I can’t drive the entire way there.”

“You can’t?” Illumi’s nose scrunched slightly, brain working on overdrive in attempts to figure out where his first adventure would take place. 

“Nope.” You were still chuckling as you relished in the odd glow this day had filled you with, feeling lighter and freer than you had in years. Taking your wife’s hand, you began the long journey to the coast. 

“How are we going to get there?”

“Ah ah, that’s more than one hint.”

He paused, contemplating the options. “Are we going by rocket?”

You couldn’t help it. His innocent tone had you thrown into a fit of laughter. You had no idea your bride was able to crack jokes, albeit accidentally. 

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.” You had to calm down and focus on the road. It wouldn’t do to die before your honeymoon. “No, we’re not going by rocket. Hate to break it to you but we are limited to this planet.”

The omega hummed and looked out of the window. He then very quickly realised that he couldn’t see much in the dead of night. 

When did Illumi get so cute? Or was he always like this and you just never noticed? He certainly wasn’t like this around his family, that much you were certain about. A delicate, warm feeling settled over you at the thought that maybe, just maybe, he was like this only with you. That he was comfortable enough that you wouldn’t judge, yell or reprimand him if he put a toe out of line. 

You felt yourself grip his hand tighter.

#hxh #hunter x hunter #hunter x hunter illumi #hxh x reader #hxh x y/n #hxh x you #illumi #illumi zoldyck #illumi hunter x hunter #illumi zoldyck x reader #illumi x reader #hxh illumi #illumi hxh #hxh zoldyck #zoldyck family #do your duty #killua #killua zoldyck #hisoka #hxh hisoka #hunter x hunter hisoka #hisoka marrow #hxh chrollo #kurapika

[ador3sturniolo]

“Mine”

An - I was listing to mine tv, and I was thinking of a story/blurb that’s was so cute that I had to write it for you guys. I’m working on one story and it’s taking me a while so I wanted to write this for you guys so that way you have somthing to read!

Paring - Matt Sturniolo X FemReader

Summary - Matt is just so in love with you

Warnings - Kissing, Like one curse word

Requested - Nope

Master list

Me and Matt were secretly dating, not wanting the fans to know, but today was the first day of tour. I was going with them, although i was nervous, i was also excited at the same time. I’m in the bathroom, touching up my makeup when I hear a knock on the door. I quickly put on my lipgloss and open the door.

“Hi baby, are you ready?” Matt said wrapping his arms around me.

“Yeah, Just a little nervous.” I say shrugging my shoulders

“Don’t be, and if it gets to much for you, you can always take a break, you can come to me or go off stage. It’s whatever you need.” He says rubbing my arm, reassuring me.

“Okay” I give him a smile, leading it with a kiss. I hear a loud clap approaching us.

“Wow you two, That’s was about to make me cry.” Said Nick, wiping fake tears. Matt shoved his brother on the shoulder walking towards the stage. It was showtime. They all walked out one by one, i was hesitant but walked out behind Chris, waving to the fans. I was surprised how big the crowd was, i started to get a little anxious, i took a deep breath and sat down in a chair next to Chris they had all layed out. I wanted for me and Matt to space out so that way no one suspected anything much. They started off tour with questions, then Chris handed me the mic. I was bathed with questions, which answering them, made me calmer than before. Every now and then I would look up and find Matt starting at me with a smile. I would blush and look down and continue answering the questions. I decided to take a break and get off stage for a couple minutes, when i just got off the stage, i hear Matt make a announcement that they all were going to take a couple minute break.

“Hey baby” I say putting my fingers in his hair pulling him close.

“Hi. How was that? Was it’s bad or no?” He said putting his arm around my waist.

“It was great actually. I felt fine when you looked at me, which was all the time, even if Nick was talking. He was beside you and you looked at me instead.” I say curling my fingers

“Well that’s because your so fucking gorgeous. I just can’t believe you’re mine.” He said adding a smile. I couldn’t help but blush by his words.

“Ima going to go get some water, do you want any?” I say turning, heading the opposite direction. He shakes his head no as i leave

Matt’s pov

I Watch her Walk away as Chris pats my shoulder with force.

“Damn Chris.”

“You seem to really like her. I think she’s the one” Chris said

“I think she is. She is the best thing that’s ever been mine.” I say smiling to myself

“Okay brother, no need to turn into a famous writer.” He said walking away as i chuckle

Readers pov

I come back with my water to see Matt standing there smiling.

“Why are you smiling? Did something happen while I was gone?” I say opening my water

“Nope, Just glad my baby’s back.” He said kissing my cheek

“I love you so much, like really, i do.” I say walking with him, back to the stage.

“I love you too.” He says, pulling me into a hug.

—————————————————————

An - don’t you just love short ones?! This one was so cute to write. Leave more requests cause I’m running out!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼

#matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #the sturniolo triplets #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo edit #sturniolo fanfic #nicolas sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #speak now taylor’s version #mine taylor's version #taylor swift #Spotify

[ack4rwoman]

•°. *࿐ 𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐑, 𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐑 (sneak peak)

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ᴍ.ꜰ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

notes: on behalf of megumi’s birthday, i thought maybe i could treat my megumi stans ( he’s underrated :/ ) and give you a sneak peak of the fic in the works :)))

tw: the cutest childhood friends to lovers trope, lying, y/n being y/n (if you’ve read any of my other fics with other characters, you’d know), megumi being fed up

❝ “she’s my best friend.”

“and nothing more?”

“and nothing less.”

“you’re a liar, megumi fushiguro.” ❞

some point in chapter 3:

kento's homework had been left untouched on your desk for about two weeks (despite being given an extension because he was well aware just how bad at math you were). you were tired, exhausted, and drained: middle school was no joke. it was times like these — where some random dude decided that adding letters to the already-difficult math equations — that you felt like taking a knife and driving it clean through your heart.

you got up, a lightbulb hovering just above your head as you beamed, scrambling to take your phone out of charge and scrolling through your contact list.

— go-go-go-joe! (27 missed calls)

— nobara <3

— yuji :) (1 missed call)

— mother

— porcupine 👺

there he was — porcupine — you clicked his number and pressed the phone to your ear, lying flat on your bed once again. it dialled for all of five seconds before you heard his grumpy voice on the other end of the line:

"what do you want?"

you sighed, putting on your theatre skills to show.

"megumi..." you groaned weakly, following that with a fake cough.

"..."

you coughed again. "megumi — ahem — i'm sick."

"sucks to be you."

you repressed the desire to start yelling at him, cursing him out due to his lack of empathy. it doesn't matter whether you were faking an illness or not — as a friend, megumi was supposed to offer help, advice, ask whether you're doing well or not.

you tried again, coughing twice more this time.

"i think i have a — *cough* — a fever," you said, trying your best to sound as physically weak as possible. you got up, gently swiping your hair away from your face as you slowly made your way to the window. " *cough* — i can't do a-any homework today..."

"that so?" said megumi.

you nodded, almost forgetting that he couldn't see you. you draped one of your arms over your waist, the other hand still pressing your phone to your ear.

it had rained a little while ago, puddles forming by the sidewalk. the grass looked damp yet very shiny and silky beneath the weak gaze of the sun, hiding behind the clouds thick as cotton candy ever so slightly.

"i just — i can't get out of bed right now — *cough* — megumi."

"yeah, must be difficult."

your lip curled. "yes! — i mean — *cough* — yes... i'm so glad you understand."

megumi responded almost immediately. such a good friend, you thought. you almost felt bad for deceiving him, but it just had to be done. perhaps if you had megumi's brains for math, none of this would be happening.

"you probably can't stand up straight either," he said, and you almost let out a chuckle.

"mhm — it's so — *cough* — ugh, i hate this." you decided it was time to cage the dog. "i was thinking... erm... *cough, cough* ... maybe you could do my homework — *cough* — like last time? i'm really, really sick."

"yeah, sick to the point where you can't get out of bed —"

"yes, megumi! see — *cough* — see i knew you'd understand... you're such a great friend!"

absentmindedly, you fiddled with the fabric of your beige curtains.

"maybe you should look outside to help you feel better," he suggested.

you grinned, looking up without realising it.

"that's a good ide—"

you stopped short of yourself, met with the sight of megumi staring right through your soul from his bedroom window. lo and behold, one of the disadvantages of living right across from your best friend.

you froze.

“maybe you should use your mermaid powers and heal yourself —”

“that’s not how it works!” you snapped, furious.

you stumbled, your hands immediately grabbing the curtains and circling yourself with it, hiding yourself from view. and before he could embarrass you any further (because he absolutely would, that was megumi fushiguro), you hung up, heart returning to its usual pace and eyes wide in shock.

you hurriedly unravelled yourself from the curtains and shut them closed, walking off with annoyance.

"creep," you muttered under your breath.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・

notes: the mermaid reference will make sense once the story is published (probably won’t be for a LONG time but i’ve got a few chapters done already and there’s gonna be sooo much drama later on so… fingers crossed?) but anyway, it’s safe to assume that megumi’s clearly making fun of her — something from their childhood bcz they’re childhood friends :))) (aka, my favourite trope if done right!!)

© ack4rwoman

if you enjoyed my writing, i’d really appreciate it if you tipped me — if not on tumblr where the minimum amount is $1, then here at my tip jar where the minimum amount is $5 :)

#megumi fushiguro #megumi #fushiguro #happy birthday megumi #i can’t wait for this fic to come out #my best work so far (maybe after soano??) #jjk x reader #jjk #megumi fushiguro x reader #fushiguro megumi #i love y/n #she’s so me #so funny #my spirit animal #y/n x megumi #megumi x y/n #megumi x you #fushiguro megumi x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu megumi #fushiguro x y/n #fushiguro x reader #childhood friends to lovers #friends to lovers #alternative universe #high school au #middle school au #jjk au #highschool megumi

[raz-writes-the-thing]

Names A Plenty (Bad Samaritan Drabble)

Cale Erendreich x GN!Reader / requests are open

Summary: Cale wants to know why you have a book of baby names

CW: It's Cale

Bad Samaritan Tag List: (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

___ ___ ___ ___ ___

“What is this?” 

You’re engrossed in a particularly harrowing part of the novel you’re reading and don’t really notice the question at first. An idiot is pointing a gun at a beloved fan favourite character, and Jesus Christ- this cannot be happening- 

The book is ripped from your hands before you have time to read how that particular scenario was going to end (and maybe that was a good thing). You look up at Cale, eyes wide in surprise, though the frustration creeps into your expression the longer you look at him and not your novel. 

Cale doesn’t blink at your expression, and instead, deposits another book into your hand. You grunt, hoping Cale doesn’t lose your spot. He won’t though, of course. You don’t see his thumb stuck between the pages to keep your placement. He wants you focused on the book he’s given you, not the one you were reading. 

The book he has deposited in your hands is a baby name book. An old thing that you used to go through quite a lot, actually. Cale gestures to the book exasperatedly. 

“I said- what is that?” 

You look between him and the baby on the cover.

 

“It’s a book of baby names…” You know he knows this. How could he not? It’s right there in hideous font with the most generic-looking white baby you’ve ever seen. 

“I can see that,” he growls back dangerously. He leans over, crowding into your space and arcing a brow. “Why the fuck do you have it? Why is it in your apartment?” 

Oh. That made more sense, though it wasn’t like it was any of his business anyway. 

“Uh,” you reply dumbly, flicking through a couple of pages. “I have it because I bought it. It’s in my apartment because I paid money for it.” 

Cale breathes in deeply, and your brain flickers for a moment, wondering if this is how you go- hiding the reason why you have a baby names book. A well-read baby names book, too. To him, you supposed, it might have looked a little suspicious. 

“I’m not going to ask again,” he warns. You swallow thickly, and Cale’s eyes dart to the muscles of your throat. You can see clear as day painted on his face he’s thinking something dark. It makes you shiver. 

“I- look, don’t judge me-” you sigh, setting the book down. “I used it for my writing. You know- I used to write those stories and fanfictions and things.” You still did, but Cale didn’t necessarily need to know that. 

“I would need names, so I’d look them up in the book. I like that they have the meanings, origins and the flower that corresponds and shit. Okay? Happy?” 

Cale doesn’t move for another ten, or fifteen seconds. He must find he’s happy with the answer, though, because he plucks it from your fingers and puts the book you were actually reading back into your grasp. Open on the right page. You smile at the thoughtfulness of the action. 

You beckon Cale down so you can press a kiss to his lips, and he softens. But only slightly. To the untrained eye, you wouldn’t have been able to notice it. 

“That’s alright then,” he acquiesces. 

“Glad you approve, dearest,” you reply as he wanders off to do whatever it was he was doing before. 

And with that, you’re back and engrossed in your novel, though you may soon come to regret it if someone doesn’t take that gun off that moron…

#A/N: bonus points to anyone who knows what novel reader is reading #cale erendreich x reader #cale erendreich x you #bad samaritan fic #bad samaritan fanfiction #cale erendreich fic #cale erendreich fanfiction #david tennant #cale #cale erendreich fanfic #bad samaritan fanfic #cale erendreich x y/n #x reader #bad samaritan

[jazeswhbhaven]

Beel, Are You Srs Brah? WHB Event React Part 4 *Spoiler Warning*

Now you know the drill, gotta check out the previous posts if this is the very first part you're seeing <3 ->

Also to note, if you click on Part 3 here, it also has a way to get back to Part 2, and from there to Part 1! These will be added to master list too.

Here's to this being the final part hopefully~ Don't forget to get more snacks if you need ♨(⋆‿⋆)♨ TW://child death,violence

We're starting off with straight up angst everyone.

So we meet our buff-ass angel from the previous part (yes the one who disguised himself as a tiny devil woman) and he's here without the scar roughin' up Dre's twin brother D:

So in short, the buff angel beats the twin brother so badly he's barely alive, and Raph finishes him off. They described this very grisly, stating that he was cut in 6 pieces. Dre sat there helplessly and watched his brother die in such a way, especially for a child to see his brother die like that. PB really brought in the traumatic events this time around. It makes me wonder if anyone else has a dark past revolving around angel trauma (I know Levi does but I haven't gotten to that part of his bath story just yet)

Dre was full of rage when he charged toward Raph, he didn't care that he was swatted by the buff angel, and was offered the same way as his brother as he waited for death. Raph for whatever reason decides to cut his eyes as injury to insult, and then even worse the sword of light that slashed Dre's neck didn't make a clean cut so I'm sure that shit hurt and he was just going to leave him there to bleed out. An interesting development though is that Dre's brother who's dead...his amputated arm grasped his hand?? This is so crazy to me because that's a powerful brotherly bond right there. Even in death.

So we're back from the flashback and Dre is happy that he ran into this angel, the same buff angel that offered up his brother to Raph like nothing, and he will make sure that his revenge is dished out the same way that he witnessed toward his brother. Raph is big trouble when Dre gets a hold of him. But he says that by going blind, he was given the ability to see clearly, and to sense his enemy, and this is a grim silver lining to his trauma is how I read it.

This is not simply a physical disability to him, but something to aid in avenging his brother and his family. He accepts this as his new life, and he's glad it's all coming together.

So our buff angel is not so big and bad now. He's literally crying and begging Dre for forgiveness and even offering a way to expose Raph's weaknesses and refers to him as a monster. I mean the man is just out here willing to throw his angel brethren under the bus just so he's spared.

And now here's where I chime in from when I mentioned I had something to say earlier?

Now I know this is a serious part of the story. But this is a huge sidebar that I thought of well after the event.

This buff fucking giant of an angel, is groveling, crying, a pathetic mess despite being way larger and taller in size and you can tell by his sprite that he is, no doubt.

And if you think back to the form, he chose a tiny smol non-threatening devil, sure there's not much to think about here he needed a sure way to disguise himself. But his behavior here, his choice of disguise....

I wanna bully this angel so badly just because it's up my alley for big buff characters to be submissive, soft, and somewhat of a bbygirl or just pathetic little things. Because it's unexpected.

Like I thought he was gonna give Dre a run for his money ya know? Put up a fight? Nope. Just sniveling and crying and obviously lying about how he thinks the devils are great and how he hates Raph (maybe he does hate Raph tho but regardless)

Now, since he took part in Dre's trauma, I'm aware it's questionable to want to slut him out, but it's like yeah Dre let me 'play' with this one for a bit before you slice and dice him. Call me disgusting or whatever but hey.

Well, after the entire scene with buff pathetic angel and Dre (no surprise he started torturing him and ripping off the remaining wing slowly and genuinely smiling as if he were in peace)

We are back with our Avisos bois <3 they had made it to the Cosplay Cafe with Stolas' help! You know with all the lights in Avisos they've been complaining about how dark it is, so I wonder if it's that kind of light where it's only helpful if you're near it or something? Or maybe it's just that bad of a night life where you gotta be careful.

So the topic starts of Stolas asking what a Cosplay Cafe is and while Nabe is trying to explain, Amon is like "Hey are the cosplayers on the menu?" Like, I don't know what it is about Amon but it's like he's horny but lazily horny? lol like I don't know how to explain it. But he also brings up that he prefers Maid Cafe's. So it's very much implied that he likes this sort of stuff, (wink Amon simps dress up as a maid and serve him well)

Nabe once again questioned Amon's intelligence since he was sort of spacing out at the moment but was really on task with Miss Dealer.

I just assume Amon is one of those ppl whose focus is always there, but unless it pertains to something revolving around Beel it's the least of his worries so low minimal effort.

Yay an Unholyc reference!!! (if you've played before this devil is cosplaying one of the three love interests named Jung Hi, it's been a minute since I played so I don't remember much about him per se but it's cute to see cameos in the game. We'll probably get more)

So our bois are in the cafe, seated and waiting to get on with gathering more clues.

And clearly Stolas is not getting the program xD Like bby why are you threatening the staff he's just doing his job?? And damn we can't tell each others name in Avisos or we get killed? Rough stuff....

So Nabe inquires if something has happened because everyone seems excited and the devil next to them mentions seeing Dre or what they think someone who looks like Dre come in and cosplay as the famous 'Angel Hunter' he was scared so he pissed himself apparently and shows everyone (lmao okay dude)

So Stolas starts cussing him out and stuff but that ofc doesn't work and he seems more excited about that...

But the topic goes on about Dre, and the rumors that are out about him such as he was cut into 6 pieces, he walked around with his head cut for three days before sewing it back on...

Stolas even brings up that hanging around someone like that is gloomy and depressing. (I mean he's super anti-social lol so he's the one to talk)

And here our bby Amon sympathizes with Dre, relating to how painful it is to fight the angels and it made me feel a pain in my chest. More angst now.

But Amon relates to him, saying that someone with that amount of rumors about him must be skilled at what he does and he understands why he hates angels so much. That someone like that will carry such sadness with him as long as there are battles with angels.

Stolas calls Dre bizzare though for wanting to taunt the angels by decorating himself with left over body parts of angels. Even more weirder that this actually works on angels in the first place.

So after speaking about Dre, the Jung Hi cosplayer comes back again and asks them if they're going to order anything and well...

our bois are broke broke

like b r o k e

there's a little spiel here that compares the devils of Tartaros to the ones in Avisos and whelp, in short they can spend it on whatever whenever, without having to worry. The devils of Avisos were frugal, painfully so to a fault. But there was also no way you could get info for free here. You always gotta buy something first.

So what I find funny is that Nabe basically asked Amon if he'd be willing to pawn off his Beel toy and he straight up was like "Nah." in the most coherent state he's been the entire time.

Everything else is half-assed, but when it comes to his Beel merch. Never. Not in his goddamned life.

That's when the Jung Hi cosplayer noticed Amon's little keychain and was like "Oh if you wanted to meet Beelzebub you should have let us know~" and then-

I'm squinting hard like now I know that ain't Beel...has to be a clone maybe, a cosplayer that's really good at their job perhaps...can't fucking be this easy that they found him at the last place.

So while all of us even the bois are still trying to see if this is the real deal Beel, he's getting them to order stuff from the menus and sitting them back down.

So while he's getting their order together, Stolas and Nabe are dumbfounded and not even sure if they can tell if who they're looking at is a cosplayer or not because of how accurate the personality is.

Btw, they mention that he speaks like he's drowsy. This means....he has that groggy sleepy raspy voice („ಡωಡ„) *drool*

Meanwhile, Amon out here crying and reminiscing his past and Beel is just like :D not even acknowledging it. (bless..Amon is so emotional like he is literally meeting the person he admires)

So we're set back before Armageddon happened, back when Angels just used to come down and fuck with the devils when they felt like it. Amon is seen here just coming of age, and his parents have died from a recent attack. Due to living in Avisos, even if he had neighbors, no one would help and he felt useless in this moment. (PB bringing the angst once again)

Beel came to him to warn him about not crying so loudly or he'd be a target (an angel was about to kill Amon too until Beel sliced it's head off) and when Beel is described here by Amon, it's almost like you can hear that angelic music or that nice music that's usually in Latin or something (I don't remember the technical term ;.;)

So Beel introduces himself because at this time Amon has no clue who he is. That's when Beel also reveals that Amon is one of the 72 devils meant to serve him!

So Amon is further confused about his new role he's never heard about and that's when some lore about the 72 is dropped on us. Only God and the 7 kings are aware by feeling who the 72 are. No one really knows who and why someone gets picked it just happens.

And that sometimes, the devil can alert their respective king during birth, other times the king may have to seek them out on their own, and in Amon's case...he needed a "trigger" so a traumatic event to make his status known to Beel.

And then there's a cute moment where Beel gives Amon a cookie and pats his head while he's eating it. And Amon is wondering why such a powerful devil, a king is being so nice and kind to him all the same breath. (because Beel is a sweetie)

Awh, so at first we have Beel being wholesome and telling Amon it's alright to cry and be himself in this moment. But then...he randomly fucking does this

naoifsdnkafjnaousdf nasdkjfn safm

----kamflkm

-

--0

Beel.

Please. We are trying to be serious here. You just found one of your nobles and you're licking tears (which seems like a Lucifer thing so that's odd) and saying you can make them taste better???? BO I

Alright, so we're left with t h i s and the next stopping point. And it's crazy because.... This officially means this is one of the longest reacts I've done T^T a part five next??? Lol Oh goodness.

#whb #what in hell is bad #whb event #whb avisos bois 💚 #whb andrealphus #whb beelzebub #honestly I can't believe this is part four #okay the next one is definitely the last part i swear

[camaro-and-smokes]

Get Out of My Dreams, Get Into My Car

Chapter 1: Who's That Girl

Read on tumblr: CH 1 [CH 2] / ?

Read on AO3 >>

No Warnings. Characters: Billy Hargrove, Steve Harringtonm Other Characters to Be Added, Original characters. Tags: AU - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, AU - No Supernatural, AU - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Billy Hargrove Lives, Gay Billy Hargrove, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Fluff, 90s, Genderfluid Billy Hargrove, Roommates, Other Tags to Be Added

Summary: 1992 in San Diego, where Steve recently moved because of his new job, he runs into Billy - literally. Billy isn't exactly what he used to be when Steve had last seen him, but it isn't a bad thing. At all. By chance, they end up as roommates and, well…

Notes: New year, new fic... Just pure fluffy fluff fluff! Enjoy 💜

::::::::::

“Thanks, Mandy,” Billy said and lifted the cardboard cup. “I’ll pay for this tomorrow.”

The waitress on the other side of the counter smiled. “Hey, it’s just one black coffee. Don’t worry about it. I’ll cover for it.”

Billy sighed, grateful for the gesture. “Honestly, thank you. I owe you.”

Mandy laughed. “Just go already. You'll be late again otherwise.”

Billy adjusted the strap of his full bag on his shoulder and walked towards the door. He realized he hadn’t taken out his smokes when he had the chance to do it with two hands, and now he had to do it with just one. “Fucking piece of...where are you?” he cursed as he tried to fish the pack of smokes from the bag while walking out of the coffee shop and onto the sidewalk.

He was so occupied that he almost walked into someone, their shoulders nudging together. The cover was the only thing that kept his coffee in the mug , only partly spilling it on his hand. He muttered an apology as he continued digging. He was all the way at the next junction when he finally caught the pack in his hands and stopped to light a smoke.

This day was one he would be glad when it passed. The Camaro had stalled into a junction in the morning, he'd had to have walked to the workshop to get the tow truck and then he had been so busy with other cars the whole day that he’d had no time to even look at what was wrong with it. And now he was late from his aerobics' class because he had to fucking walk everywhere, and he'd been late far too many times from the classes already. Alice, the owner of the studio, had already warned him she would have to cut him off from the instructor list if he didn't up his game, and fast.

And now he really needed the money. When Rob had broken up with him, he'd decided to stay in the bungalow by the beach they'd rented together. It was the first place that felt like home ever since he'd ran away from Fuckward, Indiana, and back to Cali, and he didn't want to let go of it.

At that bungalow, he'd become to terms with who he was. Happy to have a day job at the garage as a mechanic and the few aerobics classes he instructed at evenings, the neighbourhood kids' basketball team he coached that kept nailing it against the uptown teams, and the kids from foster families he taught how to surf. The musky but feminine perfumes perfectly fitting in the same row with his aftershaves. The pink crop tops in his closet, and the red nail polish and lipsticks on his dressing table.

He was being himself for the first time, and since it was now just him, he would embrace it now more than ever.

He just needed someone to pay the rent with him.

---

Steve was reading the 'for rent' -advertisements in the newspaper while he walked towards the coffeehouse at the street corner, a short walk away from his hotel and one he'd taken as his go-to place to get something small to eat. He was so occupied that he didn't notice the person who walked out the door and their shoulders connected shortly, causing him to take his eyes off the newspaper.

“Oh, sorry,” Steve apologised, but the person kept walking without turning around. Their perfume lingered in the air after them, and Steve turned to look over his shoulder after them. He smiled a little, for it was a sight to behold.

Blonde, curly hair in a high bun, held up with a pink scrunchie. Their white crop top showed a well-toned back and waist, finished with blue, high cut jeans that were hugging their figure and barely covering the top of their thighs. The look was finished with white leg warmers and white Reeboks. Steve thought he wouldn't mind looking at that sight a bit closer and kept staring until they vanished behind the building at the next junction.

He walked into the coffee shop and ordered a black coffee and a chocolate chip muffin. With his purchase, he sat down at a table in the back of the shop and kept reading the advertisements. He had to find a place to stay by the end of the week. Sure, he could stay in the hotel, but it would cost way too much he was willing to spend right now. He'd rather pay rent for a place of his own than for a hotel.

He'd moved in San Diego for the job as marketing manager for the national video rental chain that Family Video back in Hawkins had become a part of. The job would start next Monday and it was Wednesday, so he had a few days free to do some hunting for a place. He wasn't looking for buying a house right now, he still wasn't sure if San Diego was the place he'd want to settle in. So, for now he was only looking for rentals, either by himself or with a roommate, either one worked right now.

Unfortunately, none of the ads looked like a proper fit. They either had too high rent for his budget, or then it was a room with a bunch of college kids, which didn't suit him anymore. He wouldn't be able to live in a place full of young adults partying all week, every week. He'd imagined it would've been easier to find a place to stay in San Diego, but it didn't really seem like it.

When he'd drank his coffee, he walked back to the counter. “Hey, would it be possible for me to leave a wanted ad on your notice board?” he asked the waitress.

“Sure! Need a pen and paper to do that with? I can put the note up for you.”

Steve wrote the note and gave it to the waitress. He squinted to read her name on the badge on her apron. “Thank you... Mandy. I'm staying in the Holiday Inn just around the corner. Thus the mention to ask for a name in the note.”

She looked at the note and smiled. “No problem. You're not the first.”

Steve hoped that someone would respond sooner rather than later.

He stopped by the café on Thursday and on Friday, mostly because he wanted to ask Mandy if anyone had asked about his ad since no one had called him. And, okay, partly because he was hoping to run into the blonde again. But no one had asked about his note so far and the blonde wasn't anywhere to be seen, so he'd gone about his days getting to know his new home town.

It was Saturday when he was yet again reading the 'room for lent' -ads in the newspaper as he walked towards the café. He had almost given up any hope of finding any place by Monday and was looking at the ads just with a vague hope.

He was engulfed enough that he didn't look in front of him and walked straight into someone. He hit his face into the newspaper, and then he felt hot liquid covering the front of his shirt.

“Fuck!” a baritone voice groaned.

Steve tossed the now wet newspaper on the pavement and looked at his shirt, annoyed. Then he looked at the door of the café, pondering if he should go in and ask for a towel to dry the coffee off his shirt. He turned to look at the person squatting on the sidewalk, trying to gather the things that had fallen out of their bag on the ground when they walked into each other.

To Steve's surprise, it was the blonde.

They got up and started damping Steve's shirt with a napkin they'd found from among their things on the sidewalk. “I'm so, so sorry! Shit! I didn't look up and...”

Steve's mouth fell open in surprise. “Hargrove?”

Billy looked up for the first time, and his eyes widened as he recognized Steve. “Harrington? Fuck, this is embarrassing.”

Steve let out a laugh. “Uh, yeah. Not exactly how I thought we'd bump into each other.”

The cafe door opened and Mandy walked out. “I saw what happened. Here, try this,” she said and handed Steve a towel. “I hope the coffee wasn't too hot anymore.”

“Thanks, I'll survive,” Steve replied, smiling. He patted his shirt with the towel and turned to look at Billy, who was still collecting his belongings from the sidewalk. “So, how've you been? I mean, you seem to be...”

“I'm doing good,” Billy mumbled, still squatting on the ground and checking his bag.

Steve saw something rolling on the sidewalk and he took a few steps to pick it up. It was a pink lipstick. He showed it to Billy. “This...yours?”

Billy smiled a tense smile, taking the small container and opened it. The pink tube of wax fell out from the tube and back to the pavement, breaking into even smaller pieces. “Fuck,” he groaned.

“Uh, hey, can I buy you a fresh coffee or...?” Steve asked.

Billy shook his head, pulling the zipper of his bag closed and getting up. “Sorry, I gotta go. I'm already late, again.”

“You have a car close by?”

“No, in fact, my trusty steed died the other day and I have to walk to the studio,” Billy said as he shouldered his bag and started walking. “But see you around Harrington!”

Billy had already taken several steps when Steve shouted after him, “Hey, Hargrove! I have a car, on the other side of the street. Let me drive you! It's the least I can do for breaking your...lipstick.”

Billy stopped and turned around, chewing his cheek. “You wouldn't mind?”

Steve smiled and shrugged. “No, of course not! Come on,” Steve said and pointed to a dark red BMW on the other side of the street. “It's that one.”

Billy snorted. “Should've guessed.”

When they got into the car, Steve started it. “So, where to?”

“Turn around, turn right, then left from the next lights. The studio is then just before the next lights,” Billy said.

“So, right around the corner, then.”

Billy shook his head. “Yeah. It's not far, but you know, without a car...”

Steve nodded and turned the car around.

After a while of awkward silence Billy spoke. “So, what are you doing in San Diego?”

Steve smiled again. “Came here for work. Marketing for the video rental chain that bought Family Video.”

“Wow,” Billy said, nodding. “Good for you.”

“Yeah. Far enough from having to work for my dad.”

“Right.”

They remained silent for the rest of the short drive, one that was even more awkward than the one before. 

Billy hadn't imagined to run into Steve again, not at least like this. And he hadn't definitely imagined to run into him in the outfit he was wearing. Seen his lipstick of all things. Steve was the first of the people from his past who'd learned about all that, even if only superficially. Surprisingly, it didn't really feel as bad as he'd imagined.

Steve looked at the neon sign above the doors of the aerobics' studio when he parked the car. “Alright, here we are.”

Billy got out and was about to close the door when Steve spoke again, leaning to look at Billy. “Hey, I just, honestly...It was great to see you. You're clearly doing great. I'm happy about that.”

Billy smiled. “Yeah. I'm better. Actually.”

Steve smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I can tell. Just wondered about it sometimes.”

Billy closed the door and leaned to look at Steve through the open window. “You did?” he asked, curious.

“I did. Actually.”

Billy smiled a small smile. “Well, I hope you like San Diego.”

“Yeah. Me too,” Steve replied, smiling even wider.

#harringrove fic #harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #meet cute #suometar writes #get out of my dreams get into my car

[darklydeliciousdesires]

The Dream - Chapter Twenty Eight.

Huge thanks for your engagement on this, besties. I appreciate those of you who are still taking the time to read and offer feedback hugely :) Just one more chapter and an epilogue left after this one. Thanks for sticking with me to those of you who have! 

Previous chapters - Prologue  One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven  Twelve  Thirteen  Fourteen  Fifteen  Sixteen  Seventeen  Eighteen  Nineteen  Twenty Twenty One  Twenty Two  Twenty Three  Twenty Four  Twenty Five  Twenty Six  Twenty Seven

Tag list - In the comments, please DM to be added/removed (note: those not engaging will be automatically removed from the tag list, FYI)

Words - 2,948

Warnings - 18+ content throughout, minors DNI!

“Angel just got here, I’m gonna go out and meet him, babe.”  

Meryl nodded, but her eyes didn’t leave her daughter for a second, lying there in the hospital bed, clinging to life, wires poking out from her arms and hands, a machine breathing for her. David placed a kiss on her head before departing, the weight of the situation heavy upon his broad shoulders. Nurses smiled kindly at him as he passed, him nodding in acknowledgement, his chest tight with the tension.  

She might not have been his by biology, but that was his kid in there. His little. She had to be okay, because losing her at just twenty-three wasn’t an option. No parent should ever have to bury their child, and no young woman deserved to have her life cut short so cruelly when she was only at the very beginning of going out there to live it.  

A gentle nudge from a woman he’d been standing next to waiting for the elevator roused him, David shaking himself, stepping in and pressing the button for the ground floor. When he arrived outside, Angel was pacing with a cigarette, pale, eyes wide. As he expected.  

“What happened? Is she alright?”

David steadied him with a hand to his shoulder, shaking his head. “She’s in a bad way, Angel. The Uber she was in got hit by a truck on the freeway, the driver was killed instantly, and it took the fire department a half hour to cut her from the wreckage, after which she’d lost a dangerous amount of blood.  

“Her injuries are severe, and she was taken for emergency surgery as soon as she arrived. I want you to brace yourself when you see her, because she don’t look like Keri right now. They had to shave half her hair to operate on her brain, relieve the pressure from the swelling, which they did, but her injuries are so extensive that the next twenty-four hours remain critical. We’ve been told to prepare ourselves for the worst.”

It was as if someone had injected ice into his veins, his entire body trembling in chill, the fear swelling within him as he nodded dumbly, David putting his arm around his shoulders and guiding him into the building. His whole body felt rigid, his feet shuffling him forward without conscious thought, disbelief hanging over him like a fog.

This couldn’t be happening.  

Not to her, not to them. Not his Keri.  

“Jesus Christ,” he whispered in the elevator, rubbing his face with his hand. “I just...”

David nodded, gripping his shoulder firmly. “I know. Don’t matter how bleak it all is, we gotta keep faith, hold hope that she’ll recover. She needs us to.”  

He nodded, a lump rising in his throat, one that he managed to hang onto, until he actually saw her.  

“Fuck,” he winced, having to turn away and take a deep breath, seeing here lying there like that, walking to her side and leaning to gently kiss her head. “I’m here, baby. I love you so fucking much. We’re all here, and we ain’t going anywhere, not until you wake up. Please wake up soon, Keri.” Reaching across the bed, he grasped Meryl’s hand, her tear-streaked face brightening into a smile for him.  

“I’m so glad you’re here, love.”

“Ain’t no other place I’d be.” He let go after a few seconds, his fingers finding Keri’s, her hand a mess of tubes and cuts, her beautiful face blackened by bruising. It didn’t feel real, how in the space of a few hours his entire world had been capsized. Why was this happening to her?

“I’m gonna go to the machine and get a coffee,” David stated, looking between them. “You guys want anything?”

They shook their heads, Meryl thanking him anyway, the door closing with a soft click behind him.

“How did it all happen? David didn’t go into detail.”  

She took a deep breath, tremored, the story she’d heard from Sunni still crashing against her insides like a tornado. She felt fortunate at least, that someone who loved Keri so much had been there to attend to her as soon as she’d arrived, although her heart went out to him, having to remain professional while he treated his niece, all the emotion he must have had to push deep down. “A truck had a tire blow out, hit the Uber side on, propelling it into the path of another truck and sending the vehicle into a roll.  

“The guy in the second truck managed to break sharply, more cars hit the back of him, too. It was a huge pile up. He got out and went straight to their aid, saw the driver was dead, but Keri was apparently still conscious. He called for the emergency services, crawled partly into the wreck of the car and pressed his shirt against her shoulder wound, where part of the windscreen had pierced through. He stayed with her, too, and gave his account of what happened to the paramedics.  

“She was taken to the OR, where they operated to repair her shoulder and the damage to her chest cavity, also to stop the swelling and bleeding on her brain. We’ll only know how bad it is once she's stable enough to be scanned, but at this point, they’re only giving her a twenty percent chance of surviving through the night, her injuries are so huge.”  

“Jesus Christ,” he breathed, fingers tightening on hers as much as he dared, reaching to gently stroke her face. “She’s a fighter. She’ll get through it, and I ain’t leaving until she does.”

“She’d better,” Meryl choked, sobbing, “because I can’t fucking lose her, too. Not my little girl as well.” Angel moved to her side in an instant, crouching to wrap her in a hug, Meryl falling apart into floods of tears as she held onto him tightly. “Oh god, Angel. I just... I can’t. What if we lose her?”

He was soft, yet staunch in his reply. “We aren’t going to. She’s hurt badly, but she’s gonna be fine. She has to be. It ain’t her time yet.” Unravelling from her, he touched a hand to her cheek, raising his eyebrows. “All this is, is the biggest Calamity Joe stunt she’s ever pulled, and we’re gonna tell her that when she wakes up, ain’t we?”

He wondered for a second if his words were poorly timed, his effort to try and give Meryl a little lightness. When she laughed softly through her nose and kissed his forehead, he saw it was perhaps just what she needed. “Yes, that’s exactly what it is. And we will.”  

The hours that followed showed her stats stabilising, but by no means was she out of the woods. Her friends arrived one by one, Frankie and Jaime first, the former literally collapsing in tears, Angel having to pick her up off the floor after her legs had given way from under her. He sat her on his lap, holding her tight as she held Keri’s hand, talking to her, telling her how much she loved her.

“This kid has a damned tough skull. She’s made it through alive this far when in all honesty, she could have died right there in the wreckage. That’s what it is, her tough skull,” Meryl spoke, reaching to squeeze Frankie’s arm. “Remember when you guys were nine, and you decided to use a refuse bag to go sliding down the stairs, and Keri’s head smacking into the front door was your brakes?”

She laughed through her tears, drying her eyes on the back of her hand. “Or when you were having the wall built in the backyard, when she tried to climb up onto the pile of bricks waiting to be used, and one came straight down on her head? ‘I’m fine, I’m okay!’ and she had blood everywhere, looking like something out of a horror movie from a tiny half inch cut on her forehead?”  

“Or when she got so drunk, she didn’t get the pull out secured properly and ended up sandwiched in it, with her head wedged?” Jaime offered, Frankie collapsing into giggles as she remembered them having to rescue her.

“She tripped over at the clubhouse one night, ended up headbutting Gilly, and that guy has a skull like concrete,” Angel added, laughing at the memory of Gilly roaring whether her head was made of rocks, from how sharply her skull had pounded off his as he’d caught her. “Baby you better wake up and shush me, or imma start telling your friends and your mom some of your really embarrassing fuck ups.”

Sadly, their precious Calamity Joe remained unmoving, her chest rising and falling steadily as the machine breathed air into her lungs, all four of them trying to keep their spirits up in the face of such a bleak prognosis. Jaime and Frankie stayed as late as they could, before it was just Angel and Meryl, the staff allowing them both to stay with her overnight, given the circumstances, nurses coming in every hour or so to check on her. Every check yielded no change in her condition.  

“I booked the vacation,” he began to tell her, reaching to stroke her cheek. “Fourteen nights in Ocho Rios in December. I know you showed me that hotel, but the bungalow I found was way nicer, even though it cost a fucking shit tonne more, you’re worth every cent. I can’t wait to show you, you're gonna love it. You’ll scream when you see the coastline, everything you can photograph. If you’re still unsteady after all of this, we can push it back, but if not then it’ll be the perfect place to take you so you can chill out and rest. I’ll do everything, you don’t gotta worry about a thing.”

It hurt his heart, having to speak about a future he didn’t yet know he’d get to share with her, but he had to hold hope that he would. She’d survived the night, which was something, at least. There was hope she would continue to make slow progress, even if the hours that followed still offered no change.

Running on no sleep, Angel felt his eyes beginning to grow heavy at around half past five the following afternoon.

“You should try and get a little sleep,” Frankie advised, after arriving straight from visiting her grandparents, Angel shaking his head.

“I can’t. Not until she wakes up.”  

She nodded, stroking his hair lovingly. “Alright, big guy. I’m going to go grab a coffee, see you in a little while.” He watched her leave the room, resisting the urge for sleep that continued to tug at him all he could, putting his head down beside her hip on the bed, his hand still holding hers tightly.  

The sounds of the sea drifted into his ears, opening his eyes to familiar surroundings, everything so brilliant white and beautiful. Nothing was a beautiful as the face that greeted him, though.

“Ahh, he finally sleeps.”  

He felt a sob well his throat, pulling her into his arms, not able to voice the emotions stirred in him properly. “Baby, I... and you’re...”  

“Shhh, calm down,” she advised, stroking his hair. “You have to stay asleep, so I can actually spend some time with you. We need this moment.”  

Looking up at her, he stroked her face, loving kisses finding her lips, holding her to him tightly. “And you gotta fight it, what happened to you, come back to us, to me. I know that you can.”  

“Just lie here with me, listen to the ocean. It’s so beautiful here, so peaceful. This is our place, where we always found each other through the absolute madness of everything. Let’s just enjoy it. All is well here. I love you,” she spoke, her hands loving in their glide, laying kisses to his forehead. It all made sense to her now, the white room, how they always found themselves back there. Finally, she got it, what it meant, although she wished she didn’t.  

“I love you too, baby. More than you could ever know.”

Her nails scratched at his beard, her smile widening. “Trust me, my beautiful man. I know.” He sank into the peace of the moment, his heart hurting that it wasn’t real, the bittersweetness of it hitting him hard. It was how they’d begun. It felt so real, her skin against his, her smell, her, just her, there in his arms, in the safe sanctuary of the white room. “No man has ever meant more to me than you do, and I want you to know that, Angel. I want you to remember it. Never, ever forget it.”

Looking down at her, he felt sadness swell in his heart. “That obelisk, it was never about me, was it?”

She shook her head.  

“I ain’t ready, Keri. This can’t be the end. I can’t say goodbye to you yet.”  

Kissing his tears as they fell, she shed a few of her own, too, at the unfairness of it all, her heart throbbing with waves of sadness as she clung onto him. Her entire being wanted to keep fighting to be with him, but she knew. It was her time to depart. “Neither am I, but it doesn’t hurt here, baby.”

Those words broke him completely, Keri holding him tightly. “Shhhh, honey. It’ll be okay.”

“No, it won’t. It won’t be okay, not without you.”  

“Yes, it will. I mean, not for a while, but eventually.” Pausing, she kissed him, her hands gliding over his chest, drinking him in, her love burning ever brighter with every precious moment that passed. “It isn’t fair, and I know this. But at least we have right now, this moment, so I can tell you how endlessly I love you.”  

“Please don’t go,” he begged softly, willing her to stay with him with everything he had. The devil could have offered up a contract for his soul in that moment, and he’d sign his name to it instantly if it would give him his love back, make it not so that he had to lose her, and she had to lose everything. “I need to make it up to you, still. I gotta show you that I’m capable of being better for you, please, Keri. Please don’t leave me.”

“Hey, you don’t have to make up for anything. I know, Angel, I know. I want you to know that I don’t want to go, either. I don’t. But I can’t hold on, no matter how much I want to. I’ll always be with you, though. I promise.” Kissing his head, she looked at him with a smile, her beauty burning into his retinas, the moment one he knew he’d remember forever. “You look after yourself, you hear me? I love you, Angel. I love you so much.”

He felt something tug as his insides, the dream beginning to slip, protesting, trying to hang onto her. “No, please don’t go, Keri. Please stay with me.”

“I love you, Angel.”

“No... no... I love you too, baby. Hold on, please. I love you.”

The sounds of the sea swelled in his ears, his consciousness coming back to him, the feel of someone grasping his shoulders and hauling him away from the bed as a long, droning noise sounded from one of the machines, the room suddenly full of medical personnel, someone pulling him to his feet, Meryl being asked to leave the room as well, her screams sharp in his ears as his eyes watched it all happen.  

They worked rapidly, but it played by slowly to him, every movement he knew was futile, his tears falling as he watched from the open door, knowing it was too late, Meryl hysterical in David’s arms. They tried and tried, but it was no good.  

As he watched her fade away, every moment of her replayed in his head, the dreams they’d found one another in, the reality that followed, everything that was their incredible story, now cut short entirely too soon.  

“Time of death, five fifty-one pm.”  

Meryl’s wail was of primal agony, collapsing, David lifting her into his arms, clutching her tightly as Angel felt the bottom of his world crash out from under him. She was gone. As he staggered back to fall down into a seat across from her room, he felt the sharp-toothed jaws of grief close in around him, goring at where he was soft, his head meeting his hands as he cried for her, his insides churned and ripped to shreds by the shards of his broken heart.  

He had no concept of time as he sat there, replaying those last moments with her in their dream, the last time he’d ever seen her alive and well in the airport, the first dream, the first everything, the future he’d never have with her, robbed so cruelly from them both. He’d found and lost her in dreams. They’d come full circle.

“I’m always coming back.”

Except now she wasn’t, and it was through no fault of her own that she would never again return to him. The cruel, biting irony of the situation was not lost on him as the grief of losing her swallowed him whole, drowning in the darkness of it, feeling someone crouch before him, two hands stroking his arms.  

Looking up into Frankie’s tear-filled eyes, he didn’t have a clue what to say to her, both resting their foreheads together before embracing tightly, crying on one another, their worlds absolutely shattered for no longer having their precious Keri within them.

A/N - I’m so sorry to do this to you all :( I think a few of you might’ve worked it out already though, that this was where we were always heading, picked up on the clues from the dreams. Well done if you did! But yes, this was always set to go in a very different direction to how I usually take my stories, and it was a challenge, but one I hope I managed to do justice to. 

#angel reyes #angel reyes fanfiction #angel reyes imagine #angel reyes smut #angel reyes x ofc #angel reyes fanfic #angel reyes fic #mayans mc #mayans mc fanfiction #mayans mc fanfic #mayans mc imagine #mayans mc fic

[beautifulchris]

trainwreck

pairing: choi lia x gn!reader

summary: sometimes, relationships are meant to end

genres: angst, lovers to exes!au, good ending?

wc: 1,1k

tw: lia is a bad girlfriend, swearing

notes: hello everyone! this fic is part of my collection of fics! indented are the lyrics (ignore the mentions of a dress and 'boy'), banner made by me on canva. also!! idk if you'll notice, but this one is also based on two other songs from anne-marie c: happy reading!

listen to the song for a more immersive experience: spotify link | youtube link

networks: @kflixnet @k-labels @kwritersworld @whipped-kpop-creators

permanent tag list: @soobin-chois @exfolitae @linos-catnip @prettymiye0n (tell me if you want to be added/removed)

“I can’t do this anymore.”

You meant to say this for a while now, and today was the day you finally gathered the courage to verbalize the thought.

“What do you mean?”

The words that flew past her lips were nonchalant, like she was completely relaxed. Sitting up, she had her arms and legs crossed and a seemingly emotionless face. At least, that was the face you knew she made when unimpressed.

“I mean… that I want to break up with you.”

In contrast, you were so nervous you could feel your heart hammer in your chest, and sweat was running down the sides of your face. Her reaction didn’t ease you either.

“Okay.”

Was it all you meant to her? After everything, it looked like it didn’t faze her at all. Saying you weren’t hurt would be a lie.

“Is that all you have to say?”

“What? Did you think I’d get on my knees begging you to stay? If you want to leave, go, the door’s wide open” she stated as she gestured towards the front door of her apartment. “I’ll wait for you to come back. Cause I know you will eventually. You know what? I give you two weeks at most.”

You couldn’t believe your ears. Did those hostile yet detached words really left her lips effortlessly?

You grabbed your bag and left her place without delay, whispering to yourself: “I won’t.”

Choi Lia has been an important person in your life, yes.

You loved her intensely and sincerely for many months, but soon, mostly thanks to your friends, you started to acknowledge the little details. Minimal at first, but, over time, they grew bigger until you couldn’t ignore them anymore.

She’d look into your phone whenever you’d leave the room without it, subtly mock you in front of her friends, cancel numerous dates to go to parties instead, order take-away when she was aware you cooked for her…

You always put up with it because you loved her, but letting her go, albeit painful, was the best thing you could’ve done for your own health.

Called up my friends, took their advice Put on a dress, I'm out tonight I can't believe I said goodbye Oh yeah, this time you know, I finally let you go, yeah

It had been three days since you put an end to the relationship. Of course your friends would take you out on a Friday night.

The party was chill. There were around twenty people, refreshing cocktails, good background music and board games.

Lia didn’t come to mind once, much to the delight of your dear friends. 

You actually made some new acquaintances, which was nice.

Spending more time with your friends, they saw the difference in your behavior.

“You look happier, Y/N,” one of them informed you.

“You smile and laugh more, you seem more alive,” another one added.

You felt it, too. You felt free from her. Her claws. Her grip on you.

I don't know why you thought that I'd be sheddin' a tear When I'm chillin' at the party, and I'm glad you're not here And I don't know what to say, but the pain disappeared And I'm sorry Bet you think I'm a trainwreck, upset Friday night, layin' lonely in my bed Truth is, boy, I'm so fuckin' happy Without you

Life went on.

A month later, Lia was on her couch, a drink in hand. It was dark in her apartment.

“Why haven't they come back already?”

She was fidgeting, her lips pressed together and her brows furrowed.

“They should’ve been back by now.”

Her phone rang in the deafening silence, making her flinch. Her eyes widened and she laughed. “Of course, Y/N would call instead of coming unannounced.”

She answered the phone with a confident smirk, ready to hear your begging.

“I put all your stuff in a bag. Do you have a moment this week so we could trade?”

Lia’s smile disappeared as quickly as it arrived.

“Also, don’t forget to give me back the keys to my place. I feel uneasy knowing you still have them. Not like you came often, anyway.”

It was her turn to be too stunned to speak. How could you be so apathetic? It wasn’t like you to use this tone when talking to her. She stared at the wall with an open mouth.

“I’ll wait for your message, then. Hanging up.”

Before Lia could protest, the call was over. She sat there, not moving for a while, thoughts twirling in her mind.

So pour yourself another drink Sit on your couch and overthink In all your lies and arrogance, I've been alright, you know So glad you let me go, yeah

Your ex-girlfriend finally gave you a time and place to meet. Without much surprise, it was at her place. Seeing her again after so long was not as painful as you thought it would be—not as painful as Lia hoped it would be.

She had to face the fact you changed. You weren’t the easily manipulated, sweetly naive and blindly in love person anymore. Much to her dismay.

“Here,” you handed her the bag, expecting another one in return.

Instead, she took a step back and offered for you to come in. “Want something to drink?”

“No?” With furrowed brows, you crossed your arms. “Give me back my stuff, please.”

“Don’t you have anything to say to me?”

You tilted your head, tapping your chin with your free index finger. “As a matter-of-fact, no, I don’t. I just want my stuff and leave this place forever.”

“Well… I…” Not finding anything concrete to say, she sighed loudly. 

Reluctantly, she grabbed the bag from the ground behind her and put the handle on your outstretched hand, before taking hers out of your other hand.

“You don’t mind me checking, right?”

She slowly shook her head, eyes unfocused, even if you didn’t wait for her approval. The key was there, that was all you cared about. Wait, no, there was a cute outfit you forgot about, too.

You thanked her and left. She called out for you, but you didn’t turn around. “Erase my number!”

It wasn’t said with a negative tone, but Lia took it like a stab in the back. Which was really audacious coming from her.

She just couldn’t believe you left her without a second thought and didn’t come back like she was convinced you would.

And now we're at the final stop And I'm the one that's gettin' off I know you hope I'm cryin', but I'm doin' just fine

She was now part of your past. Unerasable, of course, but peaceful.

thanks for reading! feedback is always appreciated :) masterlist

#kflixnet #k labels #kwritersworldnet #wkcnet #itzy lia #itzy scenarios #itzy imagines #itzy x reader #gender neutral reader #choi jisu #itzy fluff #itzy angst #itzy lia x reader #choi lia x reader #choi lia imagines #choi jisu scenarios #itzy fic #itzy jisu * #itzy jisu imagines #itzy jisu scenarios #itzy lia scenarios #itzy lia imagines

[nobody-for-sure]

Language Barrier (Important Notes)

First of all, this is NOT a chapter/story update. HOWEVER, I do strongly encourage readers of my fic to take a moment to read through this, because there are a few things I wanted to address (nothing too serious for the most part, but y’know). It’s been out and linked on the masterlist for a while now; but as it’s not one of the chapters, I’m not sure how many people will find it. Therefore, I’ve linked it in a couple chapters as well, so it’s harder to overlook. So here we go.

First, I hadn't specifically stated this on Tumblr yet, but if you've checked the AO3 tags, you'll know that from the beginning, this was intended to be AFAB reader. The reader is/will be referred to with they/them pronouns, as well as Your/Their Grace; if you see anything else please let me know since this isn’t beta’d. Reader’s appearance is not discussed, and there is no sexual content in which the reader’s genitalia would be important (well, there’s no sexual content, period). However, there will be a time in which their AFAB status becomes important/obvious. If that doesn't bother you, please continue.

Second, there’s been people working on this from the beginning, but more and more readers have successfully cracked the code in terms of the languages the characters in the fic are speaking.

Frankly, I am incredibly pleased that there are people so invested in my work that they actively take the time to figure out things like this. But, with that said... if you do figure it out, pleeeease let the rest of my readers figure it out on their own; I would prefer not to have translations circulating. It's an extra (but ultimately not necessary) layer of story intended for the people who were invested enough to crack it. (In layman’s terms: if I have to suffer, so do you. :D) To anybody that works it out: I love to see your reactions to what I wrote, even (maybe especially) the translated parts, but shhhhh. To anybody that’s too lazy, thinks they’re not smart enough, or just has a life (can’t be me): I do plan to reveal my methods for you all at the end of the fic, but the people who just can’t wait that long have to figure it out for themselves. Overall, I don't expect to have any major issues since I know most readers are and/or will be respectful of this moving forward, but just bear in mind that I put a fair amount of effort into not only making actual dialogue but also going to the trouble of coding it, and I'm absolutely petty enough to make it actual gibberish if I want to.

Third, for those of you who are wondering: yes, the interludes are important; they’re not just an excuse to make a bad chat fic or a random OC. They will tie in, so do pay attention to each interaction. Seeds have been planted.

Finally, this story has been more popular than I expected, so a big thanks to everyone who reads and enjoys it, and bigger thanks to everyone who shares their thoughts on it via reblogs or comments (or even dms) because I eat those for breakfast. Seriously, it’s so helpful (and rewarding) to see what people like about your work. Anyways, I am taking requests to be added to the tag list for my fic at this time. HOWEVER, I will ONLY be accepting requests to add people to the list in the comments HERE, as people who haven't read this post and its siblings (found here and here) are not qualified to be added. (Of course, I encourage people to read them anyway, since there have been issues.)

That's all for now! Once again, I’m glad that so many people enjoy my writing, and I hope that you stick with me through this absolute train wreck of a piece, because believe me when I tell you I have plans. And you guys can’t even understand half of what’s going on. Seriously, what are you all thinking, getting invested in this. God I love you all. Okay goodbye.

#lbbynfs

[alphawolfstabs]

Hiii I'm back for more LoomHousen because KHBISBDIHZ

I actually told my girlfriend about this fic, and she really loved the plot (We're both down bad for Doug Van Housen haha) so now I have even more questions!!! Here, have a list!

- How did Billy end up in a totally different dimension? Have an idea or is it a total mystery?

- Why would Billy end up in the Animal Room?

- What is the mark on Housen's jaw? A scar? Did I miss it in the movie, or is it something you added?

(Billy asked so many interesting questions that are never answered, so I'm asking them for him lmao)

- So, who does Doug curse? Mommy, daddy, or..? What was supposed to be after the "or"??

- How many people experienced Doug? And most importantly, will Billy be lucky enough — or unlucky — to experience him? In one way or another (👀)

- basically, will my two favorite boys kiss in the future?

- Will there be a future?! Are you planning on making another chapter? (If yes, there are obviously questions you don't have to answer to if you don't want to spoil the rest of the story!)

- Stu! What about Stu? Did Stu notice that Billy is gone? Will Billy mention Stu to Doug? Is Stu real, or is Woodsboro just a dream?! Or the other way around, is Doug real or is this all just a nightmare Billy will soon wake up from?!! Will Billy see Stu again?!! Too many questions involving my boy Stu!

I probably have more, but that's already a lot more than I thought- Thank you for answering last time, and I hope you'll have fun with all those new questions, because I sure can read more about this fic for hours without getting bored!

Have an amazing day/night, and thank you for feeding my new hyperfixation!

<3

HELLO HIII!!

I’m very very glad you’ve enjoyed it and have shared it!! I got my Boyfriend to watch Animal Room and we came up with the crackship together, so it’s very special and very dear in my heart. I started it not thinking other people would like it but it’s SOOO much fun chatting with you, Anon!! Now! Questions, list will be in order of the question <3

• how did Billy end up there? Good question. I’d like to say, he somehow was teleported there, him and his ‘family’. So his dad exists here too. Who teleported him and why? No clue for that one, but yeah- the magic of teleportation

• Billy ended up in Animal Room specifically because I wanted him to be able to see Another Matt Lilly character, someone similar to Stu but darker, more in control. Because Doug wouldn’t let Billy be in charge, And I like the idea of Billy losing his control and just not having a good time in any way, shape, or form.

• THE SCAAAAR! That’s something I added. Canonically he does have Eyebrow Scars, but the Jaw scar is something I added that will be talked about In The near future.

• so in the fic, when Billy say “mom? Dad? Or-” and then gets decked [he got punched right? I can’t remember and I wrote it uhhh whoops-] he asks it purely to piss off Doug. He was going to say “Or perhaps it’s both of them.”

Who does Doug curse? In this fic, I’m gonna go with Doug cursed both his parents. This is purely based off the misfits scene when he’s about to sandpaper the ground [teehee ya get it?-], Will be more in depth in the near future

• Who I think have Experienced Doug, Is his little gang and Billy. Now, I would say Billy has somewhat Experienced more of Doug than the others, from the bathroom scene when something flickers across Doug’s face but it’s unreadable. Also, Billy will be experiencing him in more ways than one

• YES! They absolutely will! I need them too, so yes, it’ll happen. Promise

• As soon as I get done with my Animosity Stuilly Fic, I will be Updating The Vexation one, so that will be happening super soon I promise!

• Oh Stu Stu Stu.. I’d imagine in the Scream timeline Stu does notice, but no one else does. It’s like- The only people who’ve taken Notice to Billy’s sudden appearance OR absence, is Doug and Stu. Everyone else seems unphased. Like he’s always been there/been gone.

If Billy were to see Stu again, it would have to be at the very end of the Fic, but I’m gonna play it safe and Say both Doug and Stu are real. Woodsboro is real- it’s all very real.

Im glad you enjoy my writing!! Makes me very happy to hear! Let me know what you think of my answers and as always, I will answer more questions HEHEHFKEBF I like talking about my crackship a lot 🩵‼️

Good day/night Sweet Anon

#billy loomis #scream #scream 1996 #douglas van housen #doug van housen #animal room 1995 #LoomHousen #anon asks #asks #I LOVE THEM LOTS

[too-destiny-panda]

Day 10: Tav

A/N: I feel like this is a little all over the place (just like me when I see Wyll content), but I really can't be normal about my Tav and Wyll together. Prompts belong to @sagscrib

WC: 895

Out of all the things the Blade of Frontiers expected to encounter on this journey to rid himself of the illithid tadpole he had been forced to let into his skull, admiration was not one of those things. Fear, disgust, occasional laughter, and ridiculous moments, maybe even pride, sure. But admiration so deep it almost crossed into the practically uncharted territory of adoration? No. It was so far down the list of options he didn’t even consider it one. How foolish of him, with all those story books he used to rea, he really should have known better than to assume such emotions wouldn’t fins a way to wriggle themselves into the midst of life-threatening events.

Hi first encounter with Tav was rather eventful, as he joined forces with a group of strangers to ward off a band of goblins. Usually, such a small number of enemies would pose no problems to him, but since his infection, he found himself weaker than before his pact. And in the way some of the newcomers seemed to struggle with their spellcasting or footwork, as if their muscle memory was forcing them to do something they were no longer capable of doing, it was clear he wasn’t the only one. Of course, he didn’t connect the dots until after their parasites so rudely interrupted their introductions for the sake of uncalled for mind reading.

When he had joined their party, he was still neutral about the unspoken leader. He had no information about them other than some kind interactions with the children he witnessed them take part in before talking to him, and although it let him know they weren’t entirely heartless, he witnessed many instances where a villain had a soft spot for children and still did horrible things. It wasn’t until their goodness was projected in a consistent way did he let himself take a more open liking to them.

At first, he thought nothing of how close they were getting, believing it to be camaraderie between two people in a dire situation trying to make the best of it. Sure, they were good-looking, but having eyes didn’t mean he was looking in that way. At least that’s what he tried to tell himself, anyways. Still, he was glad to call them a friend, even more so after he was punished for doing the right thing and had his entire physiology changed because of it. They were there to make him feel better, even offering (in his eyes), empty flattery, that still alleviated some of the darker thoughts plaguing his mind.

And then he began to catch himself admiring them, truly seeing the person behind those kind words and heroic actions worthy of song. And he didn’t mean that in a bad way, oh most certainly not. He simply began to notice details about them that fit into their personality like puzzle pieces. Details that maybe new friends wouldn’t notice. Like the way they had a penchant for nature jewellery. Such as the sunflower earing they always kept in a small pouch on them, or the bracelet that seemed to imitate blueberries they tucked under their armour. The way they always smiled at the sight of an animal and did some baby talk under their breath before catching themselves, looking around to make sure no-one hear that. He always managed to look away just in time.

The way they would move in a way intimately familiar to him from all his dance lessons. Their slight accent that no-one seemed to be able to place. The complaints and curses they would mutter in what he assumes were several different languages as they tried to unsuccessfully weave a flower crown for Silfy. All those things added up until he laid awake in his tent one night, contemplating when friendship and mutual respect became a want, a desire for something more. When he began to wish for kisses under the moonlight, for the feel of their hand in his as they sat around the campfire. He tossed and turned, trying to banish such loving and decidedly unfriendly thoughts from his mind. He didn’t sleep much that night.

They never talked much about themselves, only a few mentions of their previous life here and there, more set on helping and listening to their companions, no matter how differently they viewed the world. It was clear they had some basis in diplomacy with he way they defused the situation between him and Karlach, and how they managed to keep Shadowheart and Lae’zel from killing each other. He pegged Tav for a city person, possible upper class due to their equipment of the finest quality, but their knowledge about nature, survival, and basic medicine, as well as their frugality, told a different story. When they began summoning a hawk to their shoulder, he became quite confused, the world of nobles and rangers clashing once again to make up the lovely person in front of him.

And it wasn’t until they danced together, until they held each other for comfort in the Shadow cursed lands where they whispered memories to alleviate the thought of their surroundings and he drifted off to sleep, did he have a passing thought that they reminded him of someone. At a masquerade, where the most enchanting dance partner he ever had laughed as they said they loved sunflowers.

#wyllvember #wyll x tav #wyll ravengard #bg3 wyll #wyllweek #blue writes

[djservo]

HI it's that time again end of the month it's warming up it's almost summer how did your may reading go, what's on your list for the summer?

the thread vaguely weaving together may's reads: sex, anger, and neocolonialism

YES the rumors are true YES I slashed my standard (as of the last couple years) reading goal from 50 books to a humble 36 SIGH I have two wolves inside me telling me 1. to commit fully to the bit and 2. to trust my gut/instincts — with enough willpower I could force myself to hunker down and become a lean mean reading machine just to barely scrape by with an even 50 by the end of december for some imaginary accolade/clout/tradition on Amazon-Owned Goodreads Dot Com, or I could #BeReal with myself and accept my reading habits of the past few months as a litmus test of how things have been going + so shall continue to be. I'd rather not turn my goal (and thus reading as a whole) into this looming monster that taunts me ykwim especially when the point is enjoyment so TLDR . we're being Real and Intentional and Downsizing <3 ONTO MAY'S READS, FULL OF HITS BABY!

Bad Behavior by Mary Gaitskill

I was reading this around the time I watched this vintage gay erotica Equation to an Unknown (1980) where one of the reviews succinctly says it's "Erotic ennui" — this kinda perfectly sums up the vibe of this short story collection. sex-tinged dramas, though not melodramatic, not edge-of-your-seat high stakes, but just enough entangled emotional transactions to feel as if you're on the precipice of something only to be left in the cold. I'd been meaning to read Secretary for a while now and somehow didn't connect that this was the short story collection it came from?? kismet! I have a friend who doesn't like watching black-and-white movies or pretty much anything pre-80s because they "look so old" (bless her heart) — often (moreso lately) I feel the inverse of that with movies post 2000s where sometimes everything looks/feels too new and sleek and sometimes the mere sight of a cell phone is enough to turn me off. all this to say, I did try watching Secretary but turned it off after 15 minutes bc it didn't feel right at the moment and I wanted to sit with the tepid yet strangely alluring bubble of the original story a little longer. the last story was my favorite and made me cry lolol

The Essential Dykes to Watch Out For by Alison Bechdel

there's nothing I could say that would do this justice GOD I'm obsessed with this! somehow I've read every Bechdel work Except any of dtwof, but I'm glad I waited to read it in this collective form rather than in bits + pieces. I love all the details and references Bechdel puts into every panel — I swear I must've added like 20 books to my TBR list while reading Fun Home — and how effortlessly the state of US politics gets weaved into the background of their lives in a way that really puts you in that time and place. there's clearly so much love and humor and dedication she has for her community, but I love how she doesn't shy away from community in-fighting and hypocrisies — the desire to live a happy and fulfilled life without being a liberal "sellout" queer, and what that even means depending on who you are etc etc. it's also strangely assuring to read these arguments and discussions amongst the friends and how relevant and fresh it all still feels? like we're still having the same arguments and worrying about the same things decades later and it sucks but there's also this string of consistent humanity threading it together idk we're never alone in our experiences n time is a circle n all that jazz. loved that no character felt wasted or sidelined for the sake of a "greater" plot, loved how even the children and men had their own motives/personalities, SIMPLY LOVED IT ALL + I'M HEARTBROKEN IT'S OVER! </3 (though I read they're doing an audible version soon with a buncha celebs so I'm Intrigued by that)

Dogeaters by Jessica Hagedorn

Magnolia (1999) but for Filipinos!! thrumming with chaos and desperation and anger. Similar to Bad Behavior with its lack of loose ends being tied up nicely at the end. I fear I'm too cynical nowadays to put much weight in "representation" and the corporate intentions that back it, hallmark movie endings with a very glossed-over + white-approved "see? we're just like you!" message. that sentiment is not present here whatsoever, and I adore Jessica Hagedorn for that. unhealthy family dynamics and power structures and the curse that is American colonialism thrusting itself into your very concept of what you want in life. obviously (and unfortunately) Many can connect to that, but this book is so distinctly FIlipino, so specific and dedicated to a Filipino experience, that I can only laugh at negative reviews from (white) people complaining about what an incomprehensible mess it is or how there should've been a glossary to explain certain terms and aspects of Filipino culture, etc etc. I'd like to think it was intentional of Hagedorn to omit a glossary or footnotes or much explanation at all — a big FUCK YOU / THIS ISN'T FOR YOU and I love it. could even argue that that was one of the messages at the core of each of these intertwining stories. I read The Gangster of Love and watched the play in college and was equally floored with its anger at the world, how it kinda spits in your face when you're waiting for conventions or comfort. love love loved this so much, I do not mean it lightly when I say Miss Hagedorn is my hero

+ 2 journal articles

The Bedroom of Things by Caitlin Blanchfield and Farzin Lotfi-Jam — bedroom as theater + the performance of our living spaces as we portray them in images for the spectatorship of others; connecting our interior lives to physical things/commodities as manifestations of the self

The Transnational Ga(y)ze: Constructing the East European Object of Desire in Gay Film and Pornography after the Fall of the Wall by Nicholas F. Radel — pretty much exactly as the title suggests, the effect the fall of the wall/shift away from communism had in gay porn and general (gay) media depictions of East European men. desire constructed through a nationalistic standpoint, the hierarchies of power at play. I watched a few documentaries this month that would pair nicely for a little lecture on sex work + communism in East Europe: The Fall of Communism as Seen in Gay Pornography (1998) dir. William E Jones; Not Angels But Angels (1994) dir. Wiktor Grodecki; Body Without Soul (1996) dir. Wiktor Grodecki

Currently reading Pornotopia by Paul B. Preciado and I'm about to take a trip which will mark my first time traveling with my kindle so I'm excited for that hehe I have a buncha books downloaded but my priority is getting into Dennis Cooper bc I've been meaning to for so long and I feel like several movies I watched this month had been likened to Dennis Cooper vibes in the reviews + I even saw someone on insta reading The Sluts so if that's not all a sign to finally get with it, then IDK what is!

#asks #cheesehair #reads

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

My favorite fic of yours

This was actually not that easy to answer, but in the end I’ll go with 179 Crescent Street. This is how I found you, fell in love with your Mikey and then with all the other guys. 

My favorite chapter in my favorite fic of yours

Part 9 - Of Vice and Men - I mean, it’s Mike & Sy… Don’t need to say more

The best character you've written for

Your Mike is just perfect in every tiny bit you wrote for him

The best ship you've written for

Melot & Tamsyn - they are made for one another 🥰

A fic I haven't read yet from you, but I want to

Surfer!Mikey 🥺

Something I remember vividly from reading one of your fics

Me making my most pouty face ever all the while I was reading the first chapter of White Blossoms - I was melting

What made me the most emotional after reading

Part 25 of Fixer Upper - Took me back 14 years to the most important day in my life. And you did so fucking well with this. It is still one of my favorite moments ever in reading fanfiction.

 What I like the most about your writing

Your sense of humour. I just love it!

A fic i'm excited for you updating/posting

Everything! For real! I can’t choose what I want you to work on. I need all of it!

A character/ship I didn't enjoy/think about as much before you wrote about them

You ignited my love for Melot, even before I got to read your stuff. But be sure, the way you write him made me fall even harder in love with him

Something I wish/hope you write

That modern au Charles fic you mentioned ages ago

A fic of yours that i've re-read

Uhm, I think there isn’t anything in your masterlist that I haven’t read at least twice. Like, every time I reblog I end up reading it once more. And some I may have read probably ten times or more. 

If i've ever shared/talked about your fic to someone else

lol - no - I would never talk about your stuff, or link it when people are talking about Sy teaching Mike how to go down on a woman or even DM spamming other mutuals with your stories. Or maybe I did all of this 😁

A fic I didn't expect to like so much

Making a mess of Mikey - He’s such a subby babygirl - but I love it - why did you make me love a subby babygirl?

A question I have about one of your fics

Under Orders 5 feat. the Captain - When? 

Ni.Na. You made me cry. Okay? (I read this when I was in a bad bad mood, you made it better.)

Where do I begin? -- At the beginning? That sounds logical. Ew. Oh well...

I've never been more glad that I got the crazy idea to toss 8 Henry-shaped men into the same house, because I might not have met you if I hadn't done that, and I wouldn't want to miss you <3

A fun fact about 'Of Vice and Men' -- It literally took me so long to write, and I initially hadn't planned on the three of them getting high together, but it just wouldn't happen any other way...

Your Mike is just perfect in every tiny bit you wrote for him

Hihi Thank you! (Which Mike... They're all so different, yet all the same adorable dork, whoops)

I am so glad you're loving Melot and Tamsyn (she was, quite literally, made for him. Hehe) They're so sweet and I love them so much, too...

Surfer!Mikey is 100% still underway - I'm just a little distracted at the moment, but I'm really close to realllyyyy finishing up White Blossoms, and then I hope I can shift my attention to my handsome surfer...

That modern au Charles fic you mentioned ages ago

That's really low on my list of things right now, I'm sorry :( I'll let you know if that ever gets back on the roster!

Making a mess of Mikey - He’s such a subby babygirl - but I love it - why did you make me love a subby babygirl?

Because I am evil, that's why... (I didn't know I'd love subby babygirl Mikey, either, but I think he's so fucking great T0T)

Under Orders 5 feat. the Captain - When? 

When I finally figure out what adding Sy will do to the relationship dynamic 🫣 I don't want to half-ass it and I realize it's taking a long time, but I need to get it right, sorry <3\

Cute head scritches for you, my dear non-rodent bestie <3

#ask game #ask response #thank you friend

[childofaura]

Big question I have: who are your top 10 favourite Awakening characters from the First Generation and why?

This one will be fun :D also same disclaimer I always say: these aren’t in any particular order except for number one, because he really is number one.

That’s pretty much how all my lists go, lol.

Priam. This man is perfect and wonderful in so many ways; before I played Awakening, I watched all the confessions of the male characters, saw him, and went “THAT ONE. HE’S THE ONE .” He left me smitten even before I knew anything about him, like him being Ike’s descendent, and I’ve always been drawn more towards the “Avatarsexuals”. The game always tries to play him off as annoying, but he’s just incredibly passionate about gaining strength. He’s actually pretty passionate about everything he does, especially when he confesses that he’s fallen in love with you. His confession portrait has to be one of the most romantic in the game:

Priam is a hulking beast of a warrior but here, he’s kneeling down in front of you, having taken his gloves off so he can hold your hand in his (no one else does this by the way) while he gazes adoringly into your eyes. Combine that with how powerful and handsome he is, he’s my ultimate husband choice in Awakening. The only downside is how far in the game he is before you can recruit him (Chapter 25) but he’s worth it.

2. Aversa. I like a lot of SpotPass characters, and I like Aversa for her extra lore. Most people hate the SpotPass characters for turning the villains “good”, but I think it’s neat that the bad guys help defeat the TRUE villain pulling the strings (and it’s not like bad guys like Validar became good). Aside from that, Aversa is actually a sweetheart who struggles with making friends because she feels like she doesn’t deserve it (in her supports with M!Robin at least). It definitely makes her one of the more interesting female Awakening characters.

3. Vaike. WHEN, IS??? WHEN ARE WE GETTING TEACH??? Here’s hoping he’s not a demote when we get him… he’s a cool dude and his support with Sully is actually pretty touching, they were made for each other.

4. Frederick. I think Frederick (along with Dedue) is actually one of the nicer vassal characters in Fire Emblem, because Jakob can kind of be an asshole sometimes and Hubert is… Hubert. He’s diligent, cares about others, and holds the Shepherds together.

5. Gregor. The dude is SO overlooked as “haha funny Russian man” despite the fact that he’s powerful as fuck and even could have been a Khan of Regna Ferox if he wanted to. And RESOURCEFUL, the fact that he knew how to do Cordelia’s makeup is impressive. Plus I think he’s the best dad for Severa (I actually headcanon that Severa is bilingual in Gregor’s homeland tongue and it comes out when she’s pissed off at something or someone). Great dude and I’m glad he got added to FEH.

6. Gangrel. I said it. He works great as an antagonist and he’s a fun ally with a fascinating backstory (he kind of reminds me of Askeladd from Vinland Saga). It’s actually really sad to me that he dies a horrible death if he doesn’t support with F!Robin, I’d have liked for him to have loved to do SOMETHING.

7. Kellam. NO END. I’VE HEARD NO END TO THE INVISIBILITY JOKES. I GET IT. I will ALWAYS acknowledge my boy. He’s such a sweetheart and I adore his support with Olivia. He better get a prf when he gets added to FEH or I will riot.

8. Panne. She turns into a bunny. I like her.

But also she has a great backstory.

9. Virion. Ok yes he’s silly and goofy and flirts with anything that looks remotely female and walks on two legs. But if you read his Support with F!Robin (definitely one of the most sincere supports of the game in my opinion), he’s actually a very noble and caring guy. Especially during one of the DLCs where he sells an heirloom dagger for an old couple who was sick, and refuses to be acknowledged in any way or form for doing so. He’s got a great heart.

10. Mustafa. Does this count? Probably not but I wanna give him a shoutout anyways. I’m mad that HE wasn’t a SpotPass character, as cool as Walhart was, I would have preferred Mustafa. At least he got added to FEH, I’ll take what I can get.

Special additional shoutouts to Olivia, Sully, Lon’qu, and Yen’fey, they’re also really cool. I do like the other characters (especially Maribelle’s support where she knows how to talk like a sailor) but I’d prioritize these guys on the list.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Hello Clan! 

Just a disclaimer this isn’t an ask. 

I really wanted to thank you for what you’ve been doing (fics, hc, etc.) I can’t even explain how much joy and excitement they’ve brought me, some even resulting in joining a fandom, learning it’s lore (and in the end adding it to my “fandoms I’m in”list) and characters just to understand what the fanfic is about (five times has this happened actually…). Countless times have I laid in bed and read your work over and over because of how much serotonin it gave me or it helped me get through a bad day, seriously I love that you have different types of readers (ex. Non human) and I’m so happy that i found your account. Please keep up the amazing writing but don’t overwork yourself, stay hydrated :)

(Also I apologize for my grammar, I’m not a native speaker)

Awh thank you so much!! I'm glad my account and all my work makes you happy! ^^ 💕💕💕💕

#just woke up and this was sweet to see in my inbox <3 #clanask

[frostluvrs]

you are me with all the posts about Sand. i was SO giddy in the pool scene lmao the way he was looking at Ray super calculating, like yes please, manipulate him more! Also I just love smart characters and I think Sand is one.

in my case I totally accept it's because i am bitter @ Ray for how he is treated Sand at times and not loving him back lmao I know it doesn't make sense and it's not Ray's fault he does not love him back but what can i say, it's not rational lmao I loved watching Sand not caring about Ray's feelings and only caring about revenge. super toxic of me i know haha

What do you think is gonna happen? do you think Ray is actually gonna fall for Sand at some point (that scene of the trailer 'i won't let walk away' intrigues me) or it's just gonna continue like it is now, with Ray just loving Mew and using Sand as a distraction?

Also your post about being over Raymew, same and in my case it's also not because of Sandray necessarily, i just dislike the whole pinning from afar and humiliating yourself for someone who doesn't give you the time of day, it gives me secondhand embarrasment haha so seeing Ray acting like that is hard for me haha

sorry for this novel omg! but yeah love your posts <3

firstly, don’t even apologize for the novel because i’m about to write you one back so i apologize too for you having to read this long ass answer but LOL i can’t even fault you for loving sand being calculating and not caring about ray’s feelings for once. yes it’s not rational and yes, sand is not helping by refusing to admit how he feels even when ray has given him multiple times to do it. and yes, ray has not done really anything wrong to sand before the whore comments this episode but i really just couldn’t help but smile as a sand lover in ep 6. and for me like i said in my posts i’m just glad that he’s not becoming a doormat (yet… i fear there’s still time but let’s pray it won’t happen) and we’re actually seeing flaws of his. because i was really starting to want him away from everyone in the show after ep 5 and seeing the ep 6 preview and knowing that sand was continuing to help ray even after their fight and being knocked to the ground i was just like “why god, why is he continuing to come back to this man and be around these people. GET HIM AWAY FROM THEM!!!!”

so imagine my surprise and happiness when i saw sand in ep 6 prioritize his revenge over his feelings for ray and decided that he was going to use ray’s feelings. and like you said the way he went about it was really smart. is it toxic to think like that? like you said yes but i’m just happy that sand is capable of this shit too. and it also stays true to his character. he clearly didn’t expect a blow up like that and he clearly feels bad about it and didn’t take ray’s comments to heart because he knows that he was just doing it to lash out at him and push him away. and he continued to follow him to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself or anyone else around him. it’s not like he was faking being a good guy and a genuine person with feelings for ray- this just added layers to his character. like sand, best character on the show? to me he is!

in regards to asking what i think will happen…. honestly, this show is so unpredictable (and even when predictable things do happen they happen in unpredictable ways if you get me) that i genuinely cannot tell you what i think is going to end up happening between ray and sand. there is so many possibilities that could happen that i’ve been thinking of since the show started and i know other people have theorized too that i’m gonna list below and there’s also the path i personally would like for them to take it.

so my ideal scenario (that i don’t think is gonna happen unfortunately) is that starting next episode they become closer and their relationship develops and ray’s feelings become more obvious and more clear that he’s falling. but yes, part of it is because ray becomes attached to sand in an unhealthy way. i would like for them to dig deeper into ray’s alcoholism and for sand to try to get help for ray, but ray not wanting to take it possibly. i’m not sure and i know i also haven’t thought too hard about where ray’s feelings for mew come in and continue to be a problem, sand seemingly walking away at some point and sand’s ex possibly coming back fits in but my ideal ending would be ray deciding to get help or go to rehab and sand being the constant in his life that is going to stay by his side as he gets help. whether it be in a platonic or romantic way. whether they decide to stay friends even though they know they have feelings for each other and maybe work things out in the future in an open ending. or just stay friends in general and sand is there to to be his support as he’s getting help. or they decide to continue to be in a romantic relationship as he’s getting help (yes that can be hard navigate but it can be done and i don’t really like the way half this fandom talks about ray in regards to his addiction).

so that would be my ideal ending that i don’t think is gonna happen. i know not everyone agrees because they don’t want the show to end with something so positive and that’s their opinion and i understand why but i think getting help is realistic too and i hope they show it. i’m here for the messiness and the dumb decisions but i’m also here for seeing these characters grow and i’d like to see it from ray most of all.

in terms of paths i can see happening for sandray (and this just a disorganized list of thoughts) -

- i can see ray deciding to get help at the end but him and sand deciding to go their separate ways whether it be in an open ending or they decide just to not talk to each other anymore

- i can see boeing coming back and jumpstarting ray’s jealousy and maybe making him realize his feelings towards sand. sounds very typical bl plot so i don’t know but it’s a thought that’s crossed my mind

- obviously, the most obvious scenario is ray is going to become unhealthily attached to sand in a similar way that he is to mew and that’s going to make them crash and burn badly. i do wonder if the relationship is going to become codependent with both of them though

- mew and ray’s unrequited love for mew continues to be a problem and this can go in many different paths. we have one of the obvious things that’s probably going to happen which is mew is going to sleep with ray and ray like a dumbass is going to agree even though he clearly will know that it’s for revenge against top. don’t know how that’ll develop or ruin or both sandray’s relationship but we’ll see.

- ray never seriously chooses sand and his feelings never become strong enough to surpass his feelings for mew; so that’s part of the reason they never work out. or ray realizes his feelings too late and they can’t come back from it. or ray realizes his feelings too late and they are able to come back from it (could be where the line in the trailer about not letting him leave his life comes from)

- speaking of that scene the trailer i am very curious about the context of it. it can be bad or good or both. it’s so clear that sand is trying to walk out of this relationship or whatever it is which is interesting to me because what the hell is going to happen that sand decides to leave? i actually posted about this the other day but he knows that ray loves mew and he knows that he doesn’t have a chance and seems to have acknowledged that so would he be leaving because of mew and ray not liking him back?

maybe he decides that his feelings are too strong and he wants to walk away but ray is like “um no you’re not”. or maybe ray starts acting in a way that gives sand hope again but it gets crushed once again and he decides to walk away which then once again ray is like “no you’re not”.

or sand realizes that the relationship is not healthy and decides to try to leave it in which ray is like “yea, no you’re not”. the way in which ray’s saying it kind of scares me a bit because i can’t tell if him saying it is going to be good for the relationship or bad. i also can’t read sand’s face well at all in that scene (but to be fair it’s really quick so i guess we don’t know if his facial expression changes or what it was before).

i’d like for it to be that he’s telling him that because he’s finally realized his feelings and he wants to fight for him. but it could be he’s doing it in a desperate attempt to keep sand with him while still not acknowledging his feelings or even just not having them on the degree that sand does for ray. or it could be both or none of that and it’s something completely different in context. i don’t know but it’s definitely one of the scenes i’m most looking forward to because so far nothing has happened that has pushed sand to the level of leaving so i’m curious as to what ray is going to do. and i’m also curious about how ray is not willing to let him leave so how did their did relationship develop to that between next episode and whenever that happens?

i’m also curious about that scene because i almost feel like sand leaving because he realizes how unhealthy their relationship is is not likely to happen because it almost seems like from the preview (but to be fair he could be joking) sand’s going to understand that but decide to continue to be in the ray’s life. maybe because he thinks he can help him or because he kind of likes idea that ray depends on him (not to the extent of thinking that he set ray up to lose his friends and only be able to rely on sand- i don’t agree with that theory)? or maybe because he just wants to be around ray and he doesn’t care if it’s an unhealthy attachment that ray has on him. but again, maybe he does decide to leave because he’s like “ok this is too much my feelings are too strong i can’t do this anymore” - cue ray losing his mind once sand decides that

- that scene of them arguing in the trailer where ray says his life is going to hell because of him could possibly be because sand tries to get him help without him knowing and ray blows up at him (cue breaking the wine). or they’re arguing about mew and if sand’s feelings are reciprocated by ray. or they’re arguing about something that hasn’t happened in the show yet.

- i don’t know if this is likely, but i want to see sand take a bat to one of ray’s possessions - preferably his car. other people have said that and i have to agree. it would be for my own enjoyment HFJDJDJD

in regards to raymew i’ve made several posts about this already, but i just would like them to focus more on ray’s alcoholism and his addiction. i’d rather them start focusing in on it more this second half and also it be the main problem in their relationship.

it’s just more interesting to me and like you said even taking away sandray as a relationship i just don’t find it that interesting anymore. his unrequited love for mew was actually one of my most anticipated parts of a show for some reason but now it’s just annoying me. i think it’s because of the way they’re doing it.

i don’t think it’s bad writing i just don’t prefer it and i feel like we’re going nowhere? ray says every episode in a different way that he loves mew but knows he can’t have him and mew is like “ok can you move on?”. like how many times can we keep going on and on about this? not even saying that it would make sense if ray got over him next episode or whatever and suddenly didn’t have feelings for him anymore but i wish we actually saw this plot line start to develop in a different way or a way that would make me like it? i don’t know.

and yeah, i also can’t with the unrequited love becoming pathetic. it makes sense for ray and especially where his feelings for mew come from but that “my mew” this episode really almost took me out like i cringed so bad. again, not saying it’s bad writing i just don’t really care about the storyline anymore. hopefully they can do something that’ll make me care about it but unfortunately if they’re going with the mew sleeps with ray thing that’ll just make me more annoyed by it.

#this incredibly long answer i’m so sorry did it even make sense #only friends the series #b speaks