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stargirl1331 · 5 months

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If you wrote me

Would you write me with care?

Would you be gentle in how you sculpted your words?

I hope you know

that every time I write you,

I trace my fingers softly through memories

Plucking carefully the moments I use

I can only write you gently.

If you drew me

Would it show me true?

Would a face appear in the spaces between strokes?

Every time

I try to draw you

I cannot continue to move the pen

to form the face I remember but cannot see

I don’t remember the color of your eyes

I wonder if you think of me how I think of you

I wonder if you think of me

I hope you do

- do you remember, original poem by C

#poems #or are they ramblings?#I don’t know actually #i both love and hate it #it’s something #ehhhhhhh #may delete and rewrite later #it’s just #not quite right #also this is about a very specific person and if your seeing this and know it’s you I’m sorry you saw it sort of #I doubt you will tho #seeds in the garden

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butchfalin · 6 months

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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

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andthebeanstalk · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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turtleinsoup · 6 months

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Behold, Draxum's Military Warlords

(Also, Childhood!Enemies Leosagi)

This Usagi (Son of one of Draxum's allies) used to be a bully, because he was an incredibly lonely child and envious of the twin's close relationship.

As they grow up though, their initial animosity slowly transforms into competitive respect as they discover shared values & a common sense of dumbassery

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turtleblogatlast · 1 month

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Every day I’m haunted by the fact the boys happily swim in sewer water

Even if it’s filtered somehow there’s no way it’s not still nasty 😭 Bet they can defeat any of their villains just by accidentally giving them diseases I swear

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #bless their hearts but they’re nasty #it’s funny because like #each and every one of them has moments #where they’re a typical disgusting teenage boy #and then the next they have STANDARDS #can’t blame Leo for being so determined to go to a spa #even if he nearly licked his own foot that’s prob cleaner than anything else the boys have been up to in years 💀#thank you shelldon for all your hard work cleaning after then 🙏#they’re all gross teenage boys!!!#even Donnie he is NO exception here #bro was DRINKING A BEVERAGE while wading through sewer water he is just as gross as his bros #bro also talks with his mouth full he is no more refined than his equally gross bros fr and I love it #but yeah no way that water isn’t disgusting even filtering it would still leave grime on the walls of the sewer for yearsss #pros of them moving into an abandoned subway system is fixing their sense of smell enough to not be as gross #100% that’s part of why they didn’t mind being so filthy pre shelldon #because I mean they were literally raised in the sewers and they’re teenage boys like that’s a double whammy #THEY ALSO DONT WEAR SHOES #the few times any of them do the shoes are discarded before heading home 💀#I love them tho they are endearing anyhow #April’s immune system must be godlike just being around them fr #honestly no joke Mikey’s probably the cleanest of them all #just by virtue of being a chef #Leo I see as a mixture since he no doubt loves to pamper himself so he’s clean like #a percentage of time before he goes out and ruins his own hard work #Donnie is similar in that he’s just VERY SELECTIVE about what he thinks is too gross #Raph may be more on the stinky end but it’s not his fault he has his stinks and eats things of dubious origin(esp since his bros ate poison)#Donnie and Leo really have the gall to be sick about Raph eating the origami salami but they have no room to talk #all their villains are prob like please stay away from us we have salmonella now

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hyakunana · 8 months

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When you need to lie, but you're a good boy.

#Lies of P #lop #neowiz #pinocchio #fanart #comics #interrupting your local d2 art fever for puppet time -- we shall return soon #I'm not done with the game yet so i ain't checking tags #steamrolled this one bc i still wanna do another d2 comic for the weekend #cant lose momentum yet yelp #as i prepare this post i'm stuck on the cathedral boss for two afternoons already #like-- i am having progress with the battle and improving my timing so i guess that's something?#i'm not a souls player -- that's my brother -- but when i doubt myself he pats me and #'nah you are a souls player - you have persistence' and honestly he's not wrong #i'm actually enjoying the learning process of the battle even tho i'm stuck for two afternoons #i mean i spent 37 hours on the demo so at least i am taking my time sdfghjhgfd

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radiance1 · 4 months

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Danny and (a recently revived) Jason move into an apartment together, they live right next to each other too.

The thing with this, however, is that the both of them?

They goddamn hate each other.

If murder was not illegal, they would genuinely kill each other. But since it is, they settle for the next best thing, just beating each other up on sight.

At least, until the landlord told them to not fight on their property and if they were to do it out of sight, so they don't scare away any more potential clients.

They've already scared away more than 10.

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #dcxdp #dc x dp crossover #You know that one comment that thought I was genuinely hating even though I put (This is just for dramatic effect) near the top of the post #Yea I'm still thinking about that and maybe the slightest bit salty over it #Doubt they'd ever see this though since it was resolved pretty fine in my opinion :D #but if you do see this #You know who you are #Anyways #Danny and Jason fight like feral cats in my opinion #Even though Jason is a highly trained fighter #Okay maybe Danny fights like the feral cat and Jason fights like a more refined version of that #Still feral tho

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phykoha · 8 months

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Fuck you *designs the turtles' kooky other-dimension sister*

Thinking about her and trying to come up with her design just made me think of Arcane's Jinx, so that's definitely her main inspo. As well as Briar, another League champion. I made her the Venus, bc I really want Big Mama's assistant to be a Jennika type- Given their respective stories, with Jenny being from the Foot Clan.

Her markings are also inspired by the concept art of the turtles' 'Ninpo Forms'.

#kinda wanna keep her name as Venus #like the planet!#cuz I doubt the sisters would go by artist names coincidentally- you know? fjdshgfsd #tho i do love the idea that assistant would be named Frida after Frida Kahlo #phy's sketchbook #Sister Vee #art #tmnt #rottmnt #rottmnt venus #tmnt venus #venus de milo #rottmnt leo #tmnt leo #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #teenage mutant ninja turtles

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general-cyno · 6 months

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So bring on the marines or pirates or sea beasts. You're my captain, Luffy, and I'm your first mate.

#opedit #oplaedit #onepieceedit #one piece live action #one piece #zolu #roronoa zoro #monkey d. luffy #zoro #luffy #myedit #mygifs #zoro when ppl try to recruit him: (commits murder; prefers getting strung up in a yard like a criminal)#zoro when the cute crazy twink from the bar wants him to join his pirate crew: 😏😏😏😏#he's so funny #i also love how luffy went from hey you're good and strong maybe you should join me no pressure tho #to outright admitting what he needs (when everything's seemingly falling apart and he's doubting himself) is zoro #i love when men aren't normal abt each other

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gossip-girl-of-middleearth · 2 years

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I have walked away after reading the news, made a cup of tea, and have returned more calm with a fresh meme and hot take for y’all

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luck-of-the-drawings · 2 months

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so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS] an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.