Saying 'fuck you' is risky. Like, no, I don't want to fuck you. Saying 'Go fuck yourself' is better. Like, yeah, do the fucking yourself, bitch.
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Gala Pals
Danny glared at Vlad who was bosting about him to some other rich guy, Danny knew nothing about. He doesn't keep up with high society stuff. Vlad had dragged him to this Gala against his will, blackmailing him into it, and now he was stuck here. Well, considering the sour look, the kid of the other rich guy sported they were in a similar situation.
Vlad was now going on an on about his new building project he wanted the other guy to finace and Danny was only half listening as he muttered: "One wishes to acquainted your facial features with a fundamental item used in building walls."
There was a pause, and he heard the fruitloops fake laughter before he added: "Repeatedly."
He blames Sam for this. She had been teaching him and Tuck about how to politely tell someone to fuck off because of a meme. Though he did not expect the kid next to him to response.
"I believe the cutlery appropriately sharpened and commonly used for cutting would work better in this case."
Danny stared at the kid that was only a couple years younger. Before mischievous smile spread accros his face when he saw the others smirk. Huh maybe this Gala wouldn't be as boring and tedious after all.
Meanwhile, Bruce did his best to keep his act up as Vlad Masters just wouldn't stop talking to him. He half listened in on his son conversing with Master's Godson. He was happy that his boy was making friends, but the way they talked, he really hoped Alfred had confiscated any blade, Damian could have smuggled into the Gala.
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"Okay everyone floor is lava in 10..."
children scatter across the in door park.
"9..."
some leap onto nearby benches. Others climb nearby trees.
"8...7..."
the nearby safe spots become too crowded. Some force their way in while others sprint for the only place with enough room for the remaining few. The water fountain.
"6...5..."
the fountain can hold them all but is far. The slow one's won't make it.
"3...2...1..."
Some of the strong ones carry the slowest. their kindness is their downfall.
"FLOOR IS LAVA!!"
the lava takes them.
"Okay everyone on the ground is out!"
*chorus of groaning*
"So we have, 1, 2, 3...8...11...wait. Everyone hold still for a sec." the human recounts the children. And then again. And again.
"Where's Piper?"
"She was running that way!"
"Yeah towards the field!"
"The field? But there's nothing to climb there.."
"Is the floor still lava!?!"
Out in the field is Piper, sitting on top of her other teacher Kim's shoulders.
"Piper your out, you know the rules. You can't ask someone to carry you when the floor is lava."
"I didn't carry her."
"Kim no fibbing. Kids don't like it when it comes to floor is lava."
"No really I didn't. She climbed me," the woman picks the girl off her and put her down "show them Piper."
The 7 year old smiles and goes behind Kim and then starts to climb. Using the adults calves as a step she boosts her other foot to Kim's hip and then latches onto her neck with her arms. From their she shimmies herself onto her teacher's shoulders. All while Kim keeps her arms to her sides.
"...how long has she been able to do this?"
"Since yesterday."
"That's really cool."
"I know, right?"
.
..
...
"Human Kim I'd like to ask you a question about...human children."
"Yeah sure, go ahead."
"So as you know I am courting Morgan, who has 2 children, and I was wondering if it's normal for them at their age to not be able to climb me or him?"
"Climb you?"
"Yes, like that human child with blonde hair. Harrison is about her age yet he can't climb us like she can climb you."
"...Ohhh, yeah that's not a normal thing."
"Really?? But she does it with such ease and you look so, so, used to it. As if it was normal behavior."
"Piper is incredibly flexible and strong for her age, and while yes I am used to it that's because I'm used to kids climbing me while I'm sitting or helping them."
"So human children do climb their caretakers?"
"Yes."
"But Piper's climbing is not normal?"
"...yes. Wait. Hold on...So human children do climb on their family members but most of them can't climb to an adult's shoulders like that without help. Only a few like Piper are strong enough to do that."
"Ah. So I should not be concerned that Morgan's children can't do that?"
"No, you should not."
"Okay then. Humans are strange."
"That they are!"
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