#I still really want to get some custom made stuff for myself lol
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The sob story with this is that I wrote this yesterday and it got deleted before I could save it. I wanted to die cry, basically. Somehow I managed to re-create most of it, after working on it all damn day. (I basically ended up writing over 6,000+ words in one day. Yowza) I still feel as though the first version was better, but…no one knows that but me, I suppose. (And my partner, who got to read it right before the horrors happened). Regardless, I am proud of this and proud of myself for not giving up when it really would have been easy to. So huzzah to the fickle hand of fate and all that stuff.
For Suptober 2023 prompt “starlight”
I tag @fellshish and @canonblastedships and @clarkenting for being super cool reblog buddies, lol (which is just a thing I made up) This is the longest destiel fic I’ve written yet and it will be my first official AO3 destiel! (As soon as I remember how to do that, oy)
Edited: Now with Spiffy AO3 Link! Here!
The Starlight
There were three types of people that visited the Starlight Lounge — drunks, people desperate to score, and the employees that made their bread and butter trying to tame the other two.
Dean Winchester, unfortunately, was a member of that third group. Oh, sure, Dean had been known to put away a fair bunch of liquor in his day, and sure, Dean had definitely been known to do the Bedroom Rodeo whenever the opportunity presented itself. Hell, back when he’d first started at the Starlight he’d often been three types at once. Work, drink, get laid. Sometimes, not even in that order.
But that was past Dean. Current and newly mature Dean (hah) just wanted to work, go home, eat and fall into his bed. Working at the Starlight wasn’t that bad – it had fairly decent pay and it was often interesting. And like everyone else, Dean had bills to pay and he gave more than his fair share to Sammy. Not that Sam really needed it anymore; he was busy working as a law clerk downtown, putting himself through school. But still, Dean wanted to help as much as he could and besides it was his brotherly duty. Heh. Duty.
Tonight, due to the cold and rainy weather, the bar was fairly empty and business had been slow. There was only one of his regulars, a writer by the name of Chuck crying into his notebooks at the back of the bar. To be honest, Dean had never seen Chuck write a damn thing but the man sure could put scotch away like a pro. There was also a young couple making out in one of the booths near the restrooms. He’d been keeping an eye on them most of the night, actually, making sure no one lost any clothing. The Starlight didn’t need a public indecency charge on the books. At least, not so soon since the last one, at any rate.
Dean yawned and finished cleaning up the bar, hoping Chuck and the couple on their way to Soft-Porn Town would soon be leaving. Maybe Dean could even push them on their way a bit early, so he could get home at a decent time, for once. As he walked over towards Chuck to perhaps lightly suggest the writer hit the road, the double doors of the bar blew open – bringing in the rain, the cold rush of the wind and a new customer in a beige trench coat with seriously fucked up hair. Great.
Dean sighed and turned back around as the new guy slumped onto the first stool at the bar. His dark brown, messed up hair looked even worse up close, and he had a scowl on his face as he glared down at the bar in front of him.
“Whiskey. Neat,” Messy-Hair said, voice low and very rumbly.
Dean pulled down a clean glass and poured some of their nicer whiskey into it. Dude looks like he could afford it, at any rate. He had a nice suit on under the coat, now that Dean could properly see it and his watch was one of those big clunky things that could probably tell the time on Jupiter or some shit like that. The man’s hand reaches for the glass before Dean has barely pushed it forward. He throws back the drink in record time and hits the bar with it so that it makes a loud thunk.
“Another one.”
Dean shrugged as the man kept glaring down at the bar as though it contained all the answers to life and everything else; Dean knew for a fact that it didn’t. It didn’t even have a ‘42’ scratched into it or anything. (RIP Douglas Adams)
This time the man just wraps his hand around the glass, his fingers clutching at it and woah, Dean thinks, dude’s got some huge fucking hands. They’re big and they’re strong looking. The fingers are nice and long and graceful and oh, oh, oh. Maybe it’s a kink, or maybe it’s a preference, but Dean loves hands. Manly looking mitts like Messy-Hair here and even smaller, more delicate hands like on most women, with pretty nail colors. But Dean’s not choosy.
He sees motion out of the corner of his eye and notices Chuck signaling that he’d like to pay up. Glancing at Messy-Hair he figures he has a few minutes before having to pour him another so he sets the bottle down and heads over to the other side.
“All right there, Chuck?”
“Yeah, yeah, thank you, Dean.”
The older man is flipping through his wallet and counting out his cash slowly. Dean wipes the bar and puts Chuck’s last glass into the bucket for later cleaning.
“Write anything tonight?” Dean always asks this question. It’s like a little game he and Chuck play because it always has the same answer.
“No,” Chuck says looking up at him. He places his finger to his temple solemnly, almost like he’s holding a gun. “But I did a lot of work up here.”
He always gives Dean this look as though Dean should know exactly what he’s talking about. But, of course, Dean never does. He likes to read but he sure as hell would never attempt to write. Personally, he thinks Chuck is sort of crazy, but hey, to each their own, right?
Chuck pushes his notebooks into his old canvas bag on the bar. It’s bulging with everything he carries with him and looks fit to burst. Dean supposes that writer’s block is heavy business.
Chucks nods goodnight as he slips his bag over his shoulders, buckling a bit under the weight. Dean watches as he wobbles away and he’s not sure if it’s from the alcohol or the bag. He’d normally be worried (hey, no bar can stay in business if all its clientele got themselves killed), but he knows Chuck lives nearby. He’ll be all right and probably in his same spot tomorrow evening. He puts Chuck’s money into the till and realizes he tipped Dean more than usual. He really did have had a good night, then.
He notices the couple trying to break the world record for smooches in a single night are getting up and putting on their jackets. Maybe Dean can get out early; he’s got the DVR set for Dr Sexy already, but he wouldn’t say no to catching it live for once.
Glancing over he sees Messy-Hair is now resting his head on the bar, but he lifts it as the doors bang shut behind Chuck, the cold burst of wind making his hair looking even more disheveled. Dean heads back over to see if he needs a refill and is suddenly struck dumb by the other man finally looking at him. Holy Mother of Blue, those are some eyes. The dude is handsome. Like old-time movie handsome. Strong jaw, with a smattering of scruff, pink soft lips and eyes that look like they can see into your soul, no, scratch that, not see, but pierce. Dean swallows roughly and picks up the whiskey bottle.
“Hey, uh, it’s getting late. One more for the road?” Dean assumes the dude doesn’t know the Starlight is technically open until midnight. Assumes, hah. More like prays.
Blue-Eyes stares at him and frowns. “I thought this establishment closed at midnight.”
“Er, yeah. I suppose it does.”
“Then I’ll take another,” Blue-Eyes pauses and holds out his glass. “And keep them coming for the next forty-five minutes, barkeep.”
Dean blinks at the old-fashioned word and pours another round. They stare at each other until he hears a giggle and a clearing of a throat. He looks over to see the couple and wonders how long they’ve been waiting. Judging from the churlish look on the guy’s face and the barely contained laughter emanating from the girl, it’s been awhile. He settles their tab and takes their money (lousy tip, of course) as the two saunter past Blue-Eyes and escape out into the night. Well, at least Dean can see it’s stopped raining.
Making up his mind, he follows them from behind the bar and locks the door after them. He flips off the sign, too. He may be stuck here with Blue-Eyes, but he’ll be damned if he’ll let someone else come meandering in to make him get home even later.
He comes back to stand in front of his customer and makes a decision. Pulling down another glass, he pours some of the whiskey into it and sighs as the warmth of it hits his system. What do they always say about good whiskey? It should warm the cockles of the heart, or something like that. Not that Dean actually knows what a cockle is, but hey, it went down smooth.
He realizes Blue-Eyes is watching him and Dean decides to bite the bullet. He’s tired, bored and probably on his way to cranky town if Blue-Eyes keeps his word about the next forty-five minutes.
“So, what brings you out on a cold and rainy night like tonight, Mr, uh…what’s your name? I can’t keep calling you what I’ve been calling you in my head.”
The other man squints and tilts his head at Dean like a tiny, confused bird. And no, Dean doesn’t find that adorable at all. Nope.
“What have you been calling me in your head?”
Dean purses his lips. Sometimes he’s really an idiot. He gives Blue-Eyes a shaky laugh.
“I said I wasn’t gonna keeping doing that.”
They stare at each other again, neither one budging until Blue-Eyes releases a breath and blinks, shoulders slumping a bit more. By the end of the night Dean expects this guy to be melted into the floor.
“Cas.”
Dean frowns. “Your name is Mr Cas?”
“No, just Cas.” Blue-Eyes, no, scratch that, Cas then holds out his hand so Dean can shake it like they’re fellow professionals meeting at a party or something. As he grips the other man’s hand in his own he realizes Cas’s hand is warm, dry, and, yep, strong. The dude is seriously ticking all of Dean’s boxes without even trying. It’s a bit unnerving, really.
“Is that short for something?” Dean asks, wondering what type of name that is.
Cas just looks at him over the rim of his glass. “Perhaps.”
Neither of them say anything else for a long moment and Dean shakes his head. “People ever tell you you talk too much?”
“Yes. All the time,” Cas says with a smirk.
Dean laughs. “Well, whatever. It’s officially nice to meet you, Cas. I’m Dean. Humble and professional barkeep at your service.”
“Hello, Dean.”
Cas’s voice is deep but there’s a warmth to it that makes Dean happy. They chit-chat for a bit, just like Dean would do with any newbie to the bar. He pours them both another round and then tries his question again.
“So, you seemed a bit upset earlier. What brought you through my doors, Cas?”
Cas sighs and glances away. He taps his fingers lightly on the polished wood of the bar. He stares at Dean as though assessing him and then looks as though he’s made up his mind.
“My…er, the person I’ve been dating, dumped me tonight. We went to an expensive restaurant and ordered far too pricey food for the serving size and drank outrageously fancy wine. Then they ordered an expensive bottle of cognac, drank it all and then told me I wasn’t worth it.”
Dean winces. “Ouch. How long were you together?”
“Six months.”
“Well, it’s not too long for a relationship, but it’s long enough to hurt.”
Cas nods, looking sullen again.
“What special occasion was it?”
Cas stares at him. “How could you possibly know that?”
“Fancy restaurant, the way you’re dressed, the cognac. Nobody orders that unless there’s been a birth or an anniversary or both.”
“It was my birthday,” Cas says, looking down again.
“Fuck,” Dean blurts out without thinking. “And they dumped you? Seriously bad juju, man.”
Cas nods and takes another drink of his whiskey, looking miserable. Dean tops off both of their glasses and hums.
“What was his name?”
Cas whips his head up, suddenly looking confused and more than a little worried. “I never said it was a he.”
“It was your distinct lack of pronouns, dude. Always the dead giveaway. Trust me, as a guy who plays for both sides, I know. Pronouns are key. Hey, relax, Cas, this is a safe space.” Dean points to the small pride flag he keeps above the bar and watches as Cas visibly relaxes.
The silence that falls between them is comfortable now. Welcoming, even. Cas clears his throat and rests his hand on his chin, peering at Dean.
“So…you’re bi, I assume or, pan, perhaps?”
“Got it in one. Just another bisexual loser ruining the world one lay at a time.”
Dean winks to show he’s only kidding. He’s proud to be bi, but it doesn’t mean he can’t make a joke at his own expense. Of course, if Sam or his friend Charlie were here they’d both tell him what they thought of that.
“His name was Bartholomew.”
Dean snorts. “It fits him. Douche-y name for a douche-canoe.”
Cas barks out a laugh and it completely changes his face into something truly beautiful. Dean suddenly feels the need to always make Cas laugh like that. He can’t imagine anyone not wanting to – his laugh is infectious. And the light it puts in his eyes is irresistible.
Cas looks serious again as he swirls the rest of the whiskey in his glass. “To be honest, Bart was just the last in a long line of failed…connections. I’m doubting my own self-worth at this point. Everyone ends up leaving or they get fed up with me. I’m too introverted…too socially awkward to deal with, I suppose.”
“I don’t know, you seem to be doing okay right now.”
“I’ve been drinking,” Cas says, deadpan. “And also I’m paying you.”
Dean chuckles. “Not really, I decided to stop charging you as soon as I poured my first one.”
“Your hospitality know no bounds. Truly.”
Dean laughs. Cas’s dry delivery and poker-faced expressions really are the limit. He feels that familiar warmth he always gets when he meets someone new. A someone new that excites him. But he pushes the feeling aside because he knows on some level that trying to get into Cas’s pants is so not what the other man needs right now. Dean shivers as he realizes how damn mature that sounds. Next he’ll be looking into 401ks and cemetery plots.
“Well, consider them birthday drinks. Of course, this stuff doesn’t cost a small fortune or anything, but I figured you’d already paid out enough tonight.”
Cas smirks and shakes his head at Dean. “Thank you, Dean. It’s actually very kind of you to…take pity on me.”
He says it jokingly but Dean gets the sense that he means it. He reaches forward and touches Cas’s hand.
“Hey, no pity here. You are ridiculously attractive and if I didn’t have a conscience, I’d definitely be throwing out my best lines here to help you relieve some tension, if you know what I mean. And you are not awkward to me, but even if you were, it wouldn’t be enough to stop me from asking for your number or seeing if you wanted to meet up sometime. I barely know you but you seem like a decent guy, Cas. And I think all of those people that don’t get you can just fuck right off. You need to keep trying, man. Don’t give up just because a few losers couldn’t see what they had.”
Cas blinks at Dean, blue eyes getting huge. “You think I’m ridiculously attractive?”
Dean thinks back. Did he say that? Yeah, he said that. Figures that would be the only thing to register with the dude.
“What sort of line would you use on me? I mean, if you were going to, that is.” Cas shyly glances away and then back, a curious look on his face.
“Oh, uh, probably something like, well you know what they say — the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.” Dean waggles his eyebrows and smirks, faking a leer.
“I’m not sure that would work with me,” Cas says, mirth clear in his eyes.
“Yeah, yeah. You’d make me work for it, I know. But seriously, you need to regroup, clear out the douche-canoes from your life and find a new guy, man.”
Cas smiles at him in fondness, and nope, Dean is not going to do it. He will not break his rule about dating people just out of relationships. Not even for big huge blue eyes that make him feel sappy like a love song. Cas, however, clearly has other plans.
“This may be forward but, um, Dean would you allow me take you out for dinner? As a date, in case you were wondering how I meant it.”
“Oh, wow, Cas, um, I mean…”
Cas’s face takes an interesting journey in two seconds – from hopeful joy to miserable and wretched. Dean feels his heart break a little bit for him in that moment and mentally kicks his own ass for being a tool.
“Oh, I see. I…I’m sorry, Dean. Thank you for hospitality.” Cas fumbles with his wallet and places far too much money next to his glass. “I won’t keep you anymore. Go home and enjoy whatever is left of your night.”
Dean watches dumbly as Cas sits up straighter and then turns in his seat, his broad shoulders unyielding, suddenly. Dean knows he just can’t let it end like this.
“No, wait, Cas!”
Dean practically flings himself around the bar to reach Cas before he can unlock the door and leave without a backwards glance. He rests his hand on Cas’s shoulder, stopping him.
“It’s only because I have a rule about dating people that just got out of a relationship. It has nothing to do with you, I promise you. You need to focus on you, dude. Figure out what you’re looking for. If this one was just the last in a long line of guys who don’t understand you, try and see what people you’re going for. I mean, I’m no expert, and God knows I’ve had my fair share of jumping before looking moments, but I think you just need some Cas time right now, you know? If we ever start something I do not want to be rebound guy and you deserve something better than a one night stand.”
Cas stares at him, blue eyes half in shadow. Dean holds his breath, hoping he didn’t just lose something. All he can hear is the clock ticking behind him and the pounding of his own heart in his ears.
“That was quite the speech,” Cas finally says. “You sound like you know from experience.”
“Cas, man. You have no idea.”
“I have some, like I said, a long line of rejections. Still…” Cas’s eyes search his face and then nods to himself. “Maybe you’re right. I do tend to do things without thinking in this area of life despite being very practical usually. And you’re also right on anther point, Dean. You do not deserve to be “rebound guy”.”
Dean can’t help his grin as Cas makes the quotes motion with his fingers. They stare at each other for a bit longer before he unlocks the door. Cas steps out as the cold air filters in between them, causing them bother to shiver. Dean pauses, and then holds out his hand. “Let me have your phone.”
“My phone?”
“Yeah, you have one, right? Or have you moved on to something flashier like sky writing?”
Cas snorts and shakes his head. He fumbles in his pockets and then pulls out a slim, black smartphone. He unlocks it and hands it over. Of course, it’d be that kind of phone that can help you bake bread or turn off all the lights in the world with just a click or something. He finally finds what he’s looking for and puts his contact information in.
“There. There’s my number. Text me to let me know you get home, okay? And as for the rest, we’ll take it one day at a time, Cas. Let’s be friends, first.”
Cas smiles shyly as he looks down at his phone and nods. “Friends, first. I like that. Goodnight, Dean.”
“Goodnight, buddy. Be safe.”
Cas slips out and away, leaving a coldness in his wake as he takes his body heat with him. Dean watches him go, the black of the night almost swallowing him up. Cas pauses to pull his coat tighter, the glow of the streetlight lighting up his profile. To Dean he looks pure—angelic, almost, like a painting or a sculpture. With one last look at Dean, he eventually fades away, disappearing back into the world. Soon all Dean can see is his own breath in the air and the twinkling starlight from the surprisingly clear sky above. He locks up again and finishes his routine for the night. After he’s put the money in the safe and headed out back to his car, he feels happy inside. Like something good just occurred — like some new path has been cleared for him to travel. His drive home is quick and easy, there’s hardly any traffic mostly due to the earlier rain. It’s just as he’s pulling into his driveway that he feels his phone buzz in his pocket. It’s from an unknown number and his heart beats faster as he reads the message.
From unknown: I arrived home safely, Dean. Thank you, again. Would you like to get coffee tomorrow, or, perhaps I should say, later today? Oh, this is Cas, by the way. In case you didn’t know. :)
Dean saves the number and then returns to the message to reply, a grin creeping onto his face before he even realizes it.
Dean: Of course, dude. Coffee sounds great. Around 1pm?
Cas: Perfect. Do you know the Blue Java Café on Marion and Elm? It’s across from the park and one of my favorite places.
Dean: Sounds good. Can’t wait to talk to you sober, ya lush… (lol j/k hah)
Cas sends him a sticking-tongue-out emoji as a response and Dean chuckles as he locks up his car. He has a nice, happy feeling in his heart as he thinks of Cas. Like maybe this is something special. Or maybe it’s just that it could be and has the potential to be. He knows he told Cas friends first, but Dean’s willing to see where it…where they, can go.
#suptober23#destiel#prompt:starlight#dean and cas#meet-cute#my writing#biting nails here#like posting stuff is scary#wth#I am not used this anymore#castiel#dean winchester
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2023 creative year in review! 💦💦
The most stand-out thing to mention was this was arguably my most active and productive cosplay year...maybe ever? its incredibly uncommon that I can handmake 9 costumes in a year, but on top of that, 7 of the 9 were also custom designs, which is pretty wild.
costume-wise, i learned a stupid amount of skills and really pushed what i was comfortable with. IMO the best from the year are the collector, knives, pupet, and nekomancer at least just from a craftsmanship perspective. I try not to brag or be an ass, but I am genuinely very proud of those. they posed fun creative challenges that kept me engaged, and I'm happy with how they turned out!
the other side of the coin is although last year was my most dormant cosplay year, other crafts were super active....and the reverse happened this year _(:3」∠)_ i didnt really draw much at all other than making cosplay designs, and other physical media didnt get much time to shine either. I made some plushies, but they were lackluster, and I think I made maybe one unfinished figure lol. but I did try BJD making and loved it!! I made 4 this year and have plans to do more haha.
thats the upbeat overview, the readmore is going to be a more negative perspective so proceed with caution haha.
More than anything I wish i had more time to do art and build up Stitch in The Ditch/more OC work, but honestly this year was also objectively insane in the non-creative front. like i hit the worst patch of chronic pain i've ever had/found out my abdominals have been ripping themselves apart and bleeding for the past 10 years lol/had to go to the hospital like THREE!!!! goddamn times and now i'm dealing with the news i'm going to need abdominal surgery, got a teaching promotion/award, got my physics masters, utterly INSANE family happenings, had gastroparesis for 2 months and couldnt eat more than 200 cal a day in that time which caused all my blood levels to crash and i'm still reeling from it, and of course, have just been Cashually working goddamn 60-80 hours a week in an experimental physics lab in the background during all of this which is driving me to the point of madness- suffice to say i hit my limit like months ago lmao.
like looking back i know i should be happy and proud i did so much but i cant help but feel disappointed and wishing i had done better quality stuff. honestly, i know i goof about how hard work is, but its really really getting to me. i've always been happy with my ability to juggle so many things and preserve my ability to have a cool job, make cool things, and independently take care of myself, but work is month-by-month morphing into more of a monster thats just been suffocating everything else out. I really dont know what next year will look like, as i've been wearing thinner and thinner i'm noticing a trend where I just dont have the energy that I used to to do anything outside of my job.
I bring this up because on paper I should be happy with what I made, but I still feel like im in a stand-still. I made a lot of costumes, but tbh they were low quality/lackluster. like the number went up, but the quality didnt and I couldnt do much of any other art things. I couldve, and shoulve, been able to make much better work this year than I did, but it didnt happen as a combo of being snuffed out by my job physically and mentally.
in 2023 I got a head start/built up momentum from the beginning of the year that carried me through when things got insane in spring/summer/currently, but I'm already starting 2024 from a low point. yall. im so tired. im so goddamn tired. like its funny to goof about how much I do but its catching up fast and i think this is going to be the year when I just cant keep up anymore. Its hard to talk about since the "being crushed to death by your job" topic isnt one people want to engage with, and unless you're experiencing it first hand its hard to understand what living like that really means.
for 2024, i know theres no way I will be able to match this same number of costumes, but my goal is no matter what I want to start making things that are more solid on a construction level. fewer projects, more polish. also doing more non-cosplay stuff like world building and dolls would also be awesome. will that happen??? lord only knows. honestly usually these predictions/goals go haywire but this is also more of a response to external things outside of my control so ???? ??????? we'll see lads
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*leans casually on wall* hey,
i will take ANY excuse to design an outfit, especially wedding outfits, idk why— I just think they're fun.
there were originally two tuxedos involved in this (on the hair timeline drawing), with Flash's white and Peter's blue, but as I was editing my notes I ended up moving some stuff around and shunted Flash's transition forward by about a year and a half because it made more sense to happen around the time they get married instead of nearly 2 years later...
So like any reasonable person, I thought to myself, "oh boy! time to spend four days on a wedding dress!" (the drawing didn't take four days, i just spent a lot of time looking stuff up)
💐
closeups and thoughts under the cut:
in my head the top part of the dress is at least partially some kind of soft, flexible fabric, like a stretch satinet or whatever, or one of those really soft matte stretchy fabrics, but i honestly wasn't sure how exactly to handle that considering I'm not a tailor myself... like there should probably be a waist seam where the top meets the skirt, though probably hidden by the embroidery at least a little bit... though i guess it could also be that there is a layer of already-embroidered georgette over the top of a slip...
i did not hand draw this embroidery by the way. i almost tried. and then after .5 seconds i said, "oh this doesn't look good and i don't know what i'm doing." so then i used some brushes in clip studio paint and colored in colors i liked and added some beads that are basically not visible at 100% zoom (lmao)
they're there, i swear. i just think it would be cute if there were some very small beads adding a bit of sparkle...
Anyway, I just thought the flowers and colors would be nice. And I know you're probably thinking "huh, where'd they get sheer fabric that's only embroidered on part of it?" considering all those pre-made fabrics w/ the flowers all over... or "where did they get that dress custom-made? did one of their friends pay for it?" to which normally I would say "yeah lol they know at least a half a dozen rich people" but in this case... Well, this is a wedding that involves Peter. and Peter is nothing if not extra, impulsive, romantic, and a masochist—
Peter hand-sewed the entire dress, including the embroidery.
I figure, if he can embroider spider webs onto his suit then surely he can handle this ,as long as he has something to go off of. the dress itself isn't exactly the most complex, except maybe the skirt part falling in a specific way, so this is just another idk how many hours for him to spend futzing around with a needle and thread and insisting he can finish it in time. point in favor, because he does, but only because they have to postpone the wedding from March to May for other, unrelated reasons LMAO
also i just think it's romantic... and i like the idea of him making things with his hands all the time... he takes up woodworking a year or two before this iirc lol (the reasons for that are more morbid though... 😅)
anyway, i wanted the skirt to look nice in a wheelchair without getting in the way of things like the brake grips or the push-rims, so Flash can still move herself around (esp since she doesn't have handles on the back of her wheelchair lol) so that was another thing i was looking at pictures of. I really like georgette so I think it's probably layers of georgette, but drawing that is... hard.
probably looks a little more like this?
but plain ivory obviously, not plaid. drapey with a soft hand, not too fluffy or stiff. probably a satin slip or something underneath.
elegant... backless... I mean if Peter is the one designing it (though presumably Flash has SOME input, I mean, she's the one wearing it) how could he possibly resist the opportunity? (i just think backless dresses look nice) (also it shows off her back muscles, probably)
lmao
as it says in the pic, i figured this should be designed so it's comfortable to sit in and doesn't get tugged around a bunch but I will be honest. i did not have a lot of luck trying to research that so I gave up. I'm sure there's a way to do it but I have no idea how to draw it so I'm handwaving it along with the mysterious missing waist seam LOL
but also it's a wedding dress and most wedding dresses are wildly inconvenient even if you have absolutely no disabilities whatsoever.
at least she doesn't have to go commando...
though i'm sure going to the bathroom is a real nightmare lol
the bouquet and the veil are both on the back of the wheelchair—this was already true even before I decided Flash was gonna use this as an opportunity to be way more girly than usual, but it's still true here too. Though I did end up changing the flowers cause I realized I didn't like what I had, so the final bouquet is a mix of peonies, flowering dogwood, and some kind of wildflower that would be in season in May. Plus the red ribbon to match Peter's accessories.
oh and there's Flash's makeup too. Simple, not too dramatic. I don't imagine her ever being a red lipstick and dramatic eyeshadow kind of person, whether at a wedding with colorful dress or not, but some lip gloss and a little bit of shimmery eyeshadow that you can barely see sounds nice... maybe copper mascara or whatever but nothing dark.
her hair is also not super complicated or fancy, and she has no jewelry or anything like that, aside from the engagement ring... just a nice low bun with some pretty wisps 💞 Courtesy of MJ almost definitely!!
And the yarmulke is for a multitude of reasons. "Technically" Flash is not "legally" a woman at this point, isn't even out to her family yet (lol. lmao.) and hasn't legally changed her name yet either (she's going to after they get married), and I don't even know what the rabbi would think (i mean, i'm sure they've discussed by the time the wedding happens lol) but women wear yarmulkes these days too (these days is... 2014... btw), and Flash will have converted like 4 years before the wedding already (for reasons unrelated to Peter) so it's important to her... so, ultimately, regardless of requirements or level of reformness, I think she just wants to wear one.
Peter gets one too.
isn't he handsome?
lbr he probably wouldn't have even thought about it if Flash didn't bring it up. too busy thinking about what color of tiny beads to sew onto her dress XD
I DID loosely base some elements of Peter's tuxedo on the one from the iconic PeterMJ wedding cover—
—but mostly in ways I probably would have done anyway (dark blue tux... red cummerbund... etc.) (actually now that i think about it, the comic tux is probably meant to be black, huh) and I didn't want to make it actually the same so I gave him a pleated shirt and I didn't use a carnation for his boutonniere. Instead, dogwood (to match the bouquet obviously)—all the flowers I picked I'm PRETTY sure are in-season in May in NYC. as if they couldn't just go to any random garden and get some damn roses but I wanted to be more specific.
Peter doesn't make his tuxedo XD He also doesn't buy or rent it—Johnny Storm is the one in charge here because he insists, Peter. It's a special occasion!! He'd never let his best friend who he's totally not a little bit in love with wear a rental tuxedo to his own wedding! God Forbid. Peter eventually allows him to do so under the stipulation that Johnny keeps it tasteful and classy and "not too expensive."
Which to Johnny means "expensive silks and wools."
he's probably wearing suspenders. i didn't bother drawing that.
also these fucking shoes
NO idea if Peter keeps these. I only came up with them today. He was just gonna wear normal shoes before... but again, this is tasteful a la Johnny Storm. But Peter doesn't usually have occasions to dress fancy so having weird pseudo-spat dress boots is like. "What do I even do with these?" ("Wear them!!!")
I almost made the top part white (thus, pseudo-spats) but I think that kind of requires more of a white tie look... it looks nicer black. and hides his spidey-tighties (except he's not wearing his costume under this). Snaps, too! easy on, easy off!
(vaguely based on (these shoes) btw but not 100%)
wedding rings 💍
i already drew the rings a while ago (though i did slightly modify the coloring) so that's still the same. the engagement ring is essentially Flash's very first step into admitting who she wants to be... Peter doesn't even have a proposal planned, he just asks one day over breakfast lmfao but Flash has to think about it a lot so by the time Peter gets a yes (after a serious conversation with Flash about it) Flash is also like... can I have a ring??? and Peter is like OF COURSE (and actually he did have some money saved for this but he didn't know what to do...)
he'd probably make the ring himself if she asked—he doesn't though, they get it from a jeweler. it's... not cheap but it's less than $1000 at least? benefits of being very small and discreet.
Peter probably also offers to get himself one so they're equals here esp since power dynamics is part of the serious conversation and why Flash has to think about his proposal, but it's just not practical for Science Teacher Spider-Man to have an engagement ring and also they do not have money for that many rings.
in my notes Peter is wearing his uncle's wedding ring btw 🥹 i don't think they have Richard and Mary's rings so that's probably not an option. so, resizing Uncle Ben's ring instead.
anyway...
that's everything
here's Flash again, look how pretty she is
normally she just wears comfy athletic clothes and no makeup lol
#peterflash#trans flash#nadiart#arghdesign#fanadiart#rough art#peter parker#flash thompson#came in through the window last night#fun fact: i tried to use the generic 3d models as a base to make my life easier. that didn't work out.#also considering flash getting peter an all white tallit for this... (and possibly herself as well tbh)
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doll collection post
Hi guyz!! so somebody asked me to post my doll collection a while back and I put it off because i'm trying to rearrange my setup but its taking much longer than expected due to irl stuff.
But I dont wanna wait anymore! Feel free to just scroll through the pictures, you don't have to read the commentary if you don't want to. In fact you don't have to scroll through any of this at all. I wrote a lot because I am severely neurodivergent. Having a genuine blogging moment rn.
I have been waiting forever for an excuse to post my collection!! I was so happy someone suggested I do so.
I don't have a lot of room for everybody! Everyone is scattered around my room, but I try my best to display them nicely...
My G1 collection is moderately sized, these dolls are expensive and difficult to find. There are so many more I want, like Dead Tired Lagoona or Sweet 1600 Draculaura to go with my Sweet 1600 Clawdeen...sigh. But it just keeps getting harder! I am actually content with stopping my G1 collecting hunt for now and instead focusing on G3... Many of these dolls are from my dear friends, especially Leo and Raven (hi guyz!). Without my friends, I would only have three of these dolls... I am so lucky to be so loved!!!
I don't have many bratz that are in good enough shape to be on display. I really grew up on bratz rather than monster high... but again...these dolls get expensive! Roxxi was always a favorite of mine and a crush! Growing up, I was the type of kid who almost exclusively wanted one brat though. Yasmin. Not Cloe, Jade, or Sasha. I was devoted to collecting Yasmin because she looked similar to me. In retrospect, I really wish I had gotten more of the other girls...I do have some...though their numbers pale in comparison to the Yasmin army.
The ball-jointed doll is my most expensive doll and my largest doll (she is fucking ginormous). Even when buying her at half the original price (great deal from a great friend) she was hardly affordable.
I bought her because I plan on customizing her to be Flandre Scarlet, my ultimate comfort character! I've always dreamed of having a doll of Flan. SO why not make one myself? I've had her for months but am still too scared to cut that beautiful hair off...I'm no good at cutting wigs/hair in general. I did install her red eyes myself which I've never done before as this is my first and probably last bjd! She is gorgeous but I would consider these dolls luxury items... VERY EXPENSIVE.
(idk why the exposure is so high on these, sorry!! >_<;)
I am so happy to have the coffin bean playset!! I think it was a really good idea to get it. but I am so sad because I have hardly any room for it! So It's sitting on my dresser in front of a giant mirror so please excuse the poor editing I did to obscure the reflection of me and my living space lol...
I gave my Twyla low pigtails, though they aren't very visible, and my Clawdeen braids! I think Clawdeen looks super cute this way tbh I tried curling her hair again and again and again but the curls always fell out (I dont have much experience)...but honestly... I think I like this look even better ^_^. You can see her ears so well this way.
This Clawdeen is basically my holy grail and it was gifted to me by Leo, Leo if you're reading this I hope you know you are basically Jesus.
not to get deep but the OMG doll next to her is special to me because it is one of the last gifts I got from my late Grandpa. He took me to target and when I said I liked the doll, no questions asked, he bought her for me. Didn't give me shit for liking dolls at my big age. He simply got her for me because she made me happy, and he wants me to be happy. Dolls can mean so much. Again, I am so lucky to be so loved!!! >:D
I have this gorgeous Draculaura just chilling next to my jewelry cuz I have nowhere else to put her and honestly she is gorgeous and should stand alone.
Here I have the pride Bratz next to my bed!!! They mean so much to me, as I said earlier I had a crush on Roxxi. To see she's a canon lesbian now is so incredible!! And Nevra, her girlfriend, is beautiful! They are so cute together... they are never leaving that box though. This was actually the first doll/set of dolls where I fully understood why people are content leaving dolls in their boxes. I love to play with my dolls so much... but I could never play with these two!! If anything happened to them I would lose my mind.
Now... you're probably thinking......where the hell is Lagoona?!?! Do you not have one despite loving her this much? Of course I have a Lagoona. I AM GROWING AN ARMY!!!!!!
I really, really love Lagoona...I want to get every Lagoona doll I possibly can. Isn't she so cute! I relate to her character in the cartoon a lot too... her life at home, her difficulties speaking up when she is sad or angry, her sporty personality, etc etc... She has quickly claimed her spot as biggest comfort character #2. I included many pictures because I simply cannot pick one, she is flawless. You might recognize the Lagoona on the left, I drew her in that exact pose recently!!
I have her army on my desk, giving me the strength I need to get through my work... like Homer Simpson with his pictures of baby Maggie at his work. I get endless inspiration and motivation from Lagoona!!!
And here is the Flandre shrine bonus... I adore her!! I also have finally ordered a fumo flan that should arrive in august around my birthday eeek!!!
Anyways that is my collection. It's been many years in the making, though it's almost doubled since monster high G3 released... Mattel truly has me by the balls right now. If you read any of this, thank you. I put a lot of time into making this post, and it was really fun. I feel like a real blogger right now.
I really really enjoy dolls and talking about them. So I will happily do so anytime I get the chance!!! Will probably do an update once I finally install some more shelves and move stuff around <3
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Get to Know Me - Sims Style
tagged by @dandylion240 (if anyone else did too I’m sorry, I’m not seeming to get notifs for tags rn???)
tagging @keibea because we need more TS3 rep in tag games like this tbh.
What’s your favorite Sims death?
Old age. Because it means my sim actually made it that far and I just love seeing their life play out. Some of the more quirky, simsy ones are great though. Death by Jellybean or Cowplant come to mind lol.
Alpha CC or MaxisMatch?
I... really don’t like the TS4 MM aesthetic 😅 I really don’t like the clay hair look for my own sims, though think some people do wonderful things with it, and I do like certain Maxis Mix styles, good skin details with clay hair, certain stylised MM styles etc. but the default TS4 clay look is literally why I never moved over to TS4 in the first place, and it took too long for the Alpha scene to really take off in the beginning, so by the time there was enough CC for me to feel I would ever want to jump in, it felt too overwhelming to even try moving to essentially a new medium.
For TS3... I also am not a huge fan of the straight “MM” look either, though I think the distinction is less prominent as it is in TS4. You can easily make most “MM” stuff fit in an “alpha” game simply because they aren’t usually full-on clay the way TS4 MM is, they’re just not quite as detailed as full “alpha” CC. Whereas the other way around isn’t quite as true, intricately detailed alpha stuff might look out of place if most of your other content is vanilla or MM. So I think as well as preferring the aesthetic, I like the flexibility a more “alpha” leaning style can bring.
Do you cheat your sims weight?
Storywise, characters are obviously whatever size I make them lol.
Uh. I don’t know about weight, because I don’t think any of my sims have put on a lot of weight during gameplay. I have definitely cheated muscle levels though. Traumatic flashbacks to Loch suddenly getting BULKED whilst I was letting him run free during Riv’s BC. Absolutely not you little twink.
Do you move objects?
For gameplay, I used to try to minimise doing so just cos it breaks so much routing and stuff. Now I don’t play so I go nuts with MOO. Who needs working doors or stairs or beds anyway?
Favourite Mod?
So many mods for TS3 are kinda essential to even be able to run the game lol, like almost the entire NRAAS suite. I think I’ll have to go with the Remove Stencil mod though, cos being able to undo EA’s weird obsession with shiny clothes by removing the specular is honestly so lifechanging LOL. no more shiny wool jumpers or oil slick jeans 🥰
First Expansion/Game Pack/Stuff Pack?
My first TS3 expansion was Ambitions, because I skipped World Adventures, in fact, I think it was one of the last expansions I bought lol.
Believe it or not, I do actually own one EP, one GP, and one SP for TS4 lmao, back when I thought maybe, just MAYBE. the game might get better, and I was still trying so damn fuckin hard to force myself to enjoy the actual gameplay. So I have Get to Work, but don’t even ask me what the other two are because I haven’t a fuckin’ clueeeee.
Do you pronounce live mode like aLIVE or LIVing?
...It just occurred to me maybe it is meant to be “LIV” mode because it’s... like. Living mode. Like, Alive Mode doesn’t make sense. But my brain won’t accept it. doesn’t sound right. Always been “LIVE” mod to me lol.
Who’s your favourite sim that you’ve made?
Oh, jeez. Uhhh, I can’t *really* claim most of my current legacy sims because I didn’t make them, they were born in-game, even if I have tweaked the hell out of them in recent years. So if we’re going for physical appearance, I wanna say actually maybe Sylvie for my TS3 sims? She took so long to get just right, especially because TS3 doesn’t really do curvier sims quite as well as TS4, especially not without a fuck ton of sliders, and I had a really specific look to her face in mind that took forever to get right, had to blend her a custom skin etc. But I am finally super happy with her cute lil sassy round face 🥰 Close runners up are probably Qu or Edge.
God, I’m gonna get so fucking shot for this but here goes. Physically, my fave TS4 sims I’ve made are actually both of Tay’s brothers, Ethryon and Ailos, and also probably father, Qariel. I think because I had a little more experience with using TS4 CAS by the time I got to them, more sliders, more skin details, just generally a fuck ton more CAS CC by then, and more time to tweak them etc. As much as Tay will always be my favourite sim OVERALL... yeah. plznoonekillmebye
Have you made a simself?
Ye. I used to update her like. all the timeee too, whenever I got a new haircut etc. And, ofc, Havoc was my alter ego so she’s like. simself adjacent lol.
Which is your favorite EA hair color?
God I hate EA’s hair colours in TS3. their blondes are so yellow, the highlights don’t blend well etc. always make my own. TS4 hair colours make me want to actually die, but then again, I hate the clay hair and cartoony colours of vanilla TS4 anyway, so.
Favourite EA hair?
Favourite life stage?
Young Adult, with Teens a close second. You can do the most with the YA age, but the chaos of teenage years are real fun too lol.
Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?
I literally can’t play lmao. I have too much CC in TS3 for it to run well enough to play, and TS4... is it even possible to play TS4? joking joking... mostly. I’m in it for the story.
Are you a CC creator?
No. Never. I do not have a CC page I abandoned whatsoever no idea what you’re talking about goodbye. 💀
Do you have any Simblr friends or a Sim Squad?
RBSB represent.
No I hate everyone equally.
@lazysunjade and @thesimperiuscurse have no choice but to be talked at by me every day. I’m inescapable.
Do you have any sims merch?
I actually had the TS3 Collectors edition that came with the Plumbob USB and I was devastated when it got broken. Like legitimately heart broken lol.
Miss her so much I just want her back
Do you have a YouTube for sims?
Ew.
How has your “Sims style” changed throughout your years of playing?
I used to try so hard to stick to whatever gameplay threw at me, following the actual legacy rules, not editing sims etc, all to the detriment of my actual enjoyment of storytelling. Now I care maybe a little too much about how posts look that I get into a rut of not posting oops bye 💀
What’s your origin id?
Probably the same as my username here lol, but I avoid origin at all costs so couldn’t tell you for sure tbh.
Who’s your favorite CC creator?
Oh, way too many to choose. For sims 3 CAS stuff, the still active converters like @rollo-rolls, @vmsims23, @simtanico etc. for build and clutter stuff @kerriganhouse, and @martassimsbookcc for conversions. Honestly, I’m kinda out of the loop atm, but there’s just way too many good creators.
How long have you had simblr?
uh. since 2015, I think? let’s not dwell on it 💀
How do you edit your pictures?
Dunno how to answer this? Photoshop, I guess lol?
What expansion/ gamepack is your favorite?
It used to be pets, cos I loved having animals in the game. Now I always forget they exist oop lol. Probably Supernatural.
#tag game#saviourhide#tagged#dandylion240#this is so long I almost don't want to post it now ugh#delete later
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A bit of a mushy storytime because my anxiety has been mean to me the last couple days and has lead me to deep diving into some stuff that kind of ended up making me feel better now that I've put the pieces together. (It is about my relationship so feel free to skip it if you've had enough of my rambling lol)
My bf was engaged 5 years ago, had been with that person for 4 years, had an apartment and pets with them, and had a wedding date set and everything. less than a month before the wedding, a huge hurricane hit, fucking everything up for a long time, and they had to postpone the wedding. 5 months later, they broke up. If that hurricane hadn't hit, they would have been (unhappily) married and I never would have met him.
He hadn't dated anyone in all of that time because that relationship was so emotionally abusive and manipulative that he didn't want to deal with it again.
In the fall of 2023, I got out of a horribly wishy washy, non-committal situationship with a person that would manipulate me into trusting them anytime they felt lonely, inevitably ending when they left me for the third time, using my sexuality as their excuse (which left a horribly deep scar that lead to me breaking down crying when I told my bf about my sexuality because I was terrified he would do the same thing to me--he did not). I tried a couple dating apps, went on 1 date, talked to some flakes that made big promises and never delivered, and then decided I was fucking done with it all and I didn't care anymore. I just wanted to put dating behind me and live alone because it was easier.
In January, I worked at an event I didn't want to work at at all, I did it only because my mom wanted to do it.( The guy I had been casually talking to at the time said he would try to show up to meet me. He never did, and never brought it up again and we didn't speak again after that.) anyways, my mom took a picture of our table to send to her customer/friend to see if she wanted anything. I just so happened to be in the picture. That was the first picture of me that my bf had ever seen that made him want to ask me out. If I had been a little more convincing and stubborn with my mom, we wouldn't have been at that event. There would have been no picture of our table to send to anyone, and my bf never would have known that I existed.
It took him over a week to work up the nerve to give my mom his phone number to pass along to me. 2 days later, I decided "what the hell" and texted him. In all of that time he had been drafting a text that he was terrified to send, and was just about to push through when my text came through for him.
It's so weird how seemingly unconnected events play such huge rolls in our lives. I almost didn't get to meet the only person I have ever genuinely, without any doubt, been in love with. The only person that has ever told me that my anxiety and insecurities weren't silly and that he understood them and wanted to reassure me through them. The only person that took it upon themselves to research asexuality on his own to better understand me and why I was asking him to be patient with me. He almost married someone that would have made him miserable, and because of a hurricane, a horrible hurricane that my office building is still not fully repaired from 5 years later, I got the chance to meet him.
I always read about how much people hate it when their partners snore, and I find snoring annoying in general myself. My ex-girlfriend had one of the loudest snores I've ever heard, and I fucking hated it. It would keep me awake and I would try to shuffle the bed a little to snap her out of it for a minute so that I could fall asleep. (That relationship oxidized really fucking quick, not because of the snoring, but it was a huge mess that involved her gaslighting me and leaving me with yet another depth to my relationship trauma that to this day makes me horribly anxious sometimes). but the sound of my bf snoring is the best most calming fucking sound in the world. I will fall right to sleep with it. I don't know what it is about his snore, because I know that his ex regularly teased him and complained about it because she thought it was annoying, but I love it.
He is genuinely the most calming presence in my life and is the only person that has ever made me feel like moving forward/change wasn't something to be afraid of. If things had been just a little different, I'd still be single, and we never ever would have met, or even crossed paths. I can't help but feel like all of that is cosmically important. Like it wasn't an accident, but the universe had carefully planned out the events in our lives because we were supposed to be together from the very beginning.
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Sims tag
Thanks to those who tagged me~
1. what’s your favorite sims death?
satellite. It's so sudden and random and weird. Death be that way sometimes.
2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match?
whatever makes my game look like a dog ate a box of crayons and vomited all over everything
3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight?
hell nah, I have too many skinny bitches in my game as it is
4. Do you use move objects?
religiously, and then I yell at my sims when they throw routing errors
5. Favorite mod?
whichever one makes the hobby NPCs go fuck themselves
6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got?
I got university from the library lol but I think the first one I owned was open for business, which was a revelation at the time. I always wanted nightlife but was too afraid to ask my mom for it cause it looked SEXY.
now, as an adult, can confirm nightlife is the best one. but I am a sexual deviant, so.
7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing?
in my head it's like "aLIVE" but from a linguistic perspective I gotta concede that the "LIVing" pronunciation makes more sense because it's consistent with the other modes (buy/build) which are verbs not adjectives
8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?
I hate all my loser sims
I guess I have a sweet spot for a child sim I made back when I was a child. She lived in a trailer, had big droopy eyes like Brittany Spears, and was named Miami.
9. Have you made a simself?
yeah I basically always have one but she's a townie. to play her would be weird.
here's the bitch
10. What sims traits do you give yourself?
sloppy and lazy yeeeeeee
11. Which is your favorite EA hair color?
the custom mohawk colors bro
12. Favorite EA hair?
this bitch still has a hold on me
13. Favorite life stage?
I like teens, they're so sassy, getting them to do their homework sucks but also unlike children they can just get bad grades, nobody cares
14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the game play?
I'm a builder but I'm trying not to give up on gameplay. It's not working.
15. Are you a CC creator?
not really, I like recoloring things to look like an 80s train-wreck though
16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sims squad?
.....there are sim-cliques?
17. What’s your favorite game (1,2,3,4)?
sims 3 is hideous (sorry bout it), sims 4 has lovely landscapes but the gameplay is akin to watching paint dry. I'm sure I'll love the sims 1 once I get around to playing it. I like creepy weird stuff.
18. Do you have any sims merch?
i wouldnt let myself be seen dead in sims merch
also fuck EA
19. Do you have a youtube for sims?
I have too much CC to also run a screen recorder without tons of crashing lol I have no self control
20. How has your “sims style” changed throughout your years of playing?
with every passing day i am more of a builder and more of a maximalist
also i keep making animal sims now like some kind of furry *shudders*
21. What’s your origin ID?
lol just say no to origin
22. Who’s your favorite cc creator?
who made the baby bbq? them
23. How long have you had a simblr?
since 2017. I was a baby in undergrad then. making sims stories was like my therapy. now im an adult with real therapy.
24. How do you edit your pictures?
I churn them mindlessly through photoscape generally. anything else is too much work.
25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next?
SIMS 2 REMASTERED
SIMS 2 REMASTERED
SIMS 2 THAT RUNS WELL ON A MODERN COMPUTER WITH SIM HANDS THAT ARE MORE THAN 7 POLYS PLZ
I'm not sure who has/hasn't done this. I'll tag @sicksadsim, @pixelatedpanic, @letomills, @snapdragoned, @ivycopur, @bubuthejedi, @lifetime-want
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Tag people you want to get to know better
Thank you for the tag @nananarc <3
Favorite Color: Black and red! These are the colors I (and my OCs) wear most often / I have my entire Linux distro customized around / that seem the most pleasant to my eyes. Honorable mentions: green (especially on trees during spring/summer), pastel pink and purple.
Currently Reading: Didn't have time to read books lately, but I bought myself the 3-in-1 collection of Uzumaki by Junji Ito, so these are probably the ones I'll read next. I only read his short stories thus far and I'm hyped.
Last Song: Duett (feat. Hayley Roscoe) - Savour. Duett is the best when it comes to synthwave imo.
Last Movie: Memento (2000). Watched it quite a few times now, but it's one of my favs, so I keep coming back to it.
Last Series: FLCL! Finished just a few days ago. It was really fun, but to understand it in its entirety I'm gonna need to give it another watch soon.
Sweet, Savory, or Spicy: I love everything sweet, but I eat spicy food more often.
Craving: Right now - milk chocolate!
Tea or Coffee: I drink coffee every morning, but it's tea I can't live without. My partner and I need to have multiple different flavors at any given time. I drink several cups a day <3
Currently Working On: A fic! I'm not sure if anything good comes out of it or if I'm gonna release it here (I'm shy about some subjects lol), but I'm trying my best to make it happen. Aaaand I'm still gathering footage for my Legacy of Kain tribute video (and maybe some tumblr gifsets), but life/work-related stuff made it hard for me to finish the last game. Getting there, though. There is some game dev stuff too I guess, but it's too far into the possible future to talk about.
Tagging @wanderingaldecaldo @oranzuwu @juststayquiete @imaginarycyberpunk2023 @outlawfromthewest with no obligation!
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Hi! Your Hivecraft server looks really interesting! I've seen someone play on a server modded with what is essentially a first person rpg version of Sburb, but I've never seen anyone do an Alternia based map before! That's really cool!!!!! I have a few questions about it tho:
1. Will you be able to choose if you're a Human or a Troll?
2. If you can, will you be able to choose your blood colour as a Troll? Or is there some kind of mechanism for that?
3. Will Trolls have lusii? And if they do, can you choose what they are?
4. Will the server be private?
5. If it's not, will it be only PC accessible or will there be PC and Mobile versions?
6. Will you add the Minestuck mod or is this more of a 'Slice of Life, Living on Alternia' kinda thing?
7. Any unique resources like Sopor Slime?
8. Will there be any Persterchum or Trollian-like thing on to allow players to communicate?
9. Even if there isn't, can the players still have speech quirks?
That's all of my questions for now! Hopefully you'll have time to answer them!
Thank you! I've heard of people doing stuff like that but I was always more of a fan of the alternia themed world building etc. This is my first time playing Minecraft though so this project is sort of a learning experience.
Lots of good questions here so I'll do my best to answer
1. I don't think that's something I'm gonna manage for people, they can change their skins if they want or make custom models but I'm not sure that I could implement that for other people myself
2. As far as I know I don't think Minecraft has any sort of blood effects unless a mod or resource pack is installed but I don't have anything like that here so far. I AM planning to make some placeable items that look like blood splatters in different colors though
3. I can make mobs of lusii in the future that just act as animals do in game so I'm sure people could tame them and give them name tags so they don't despawn. I've already made some purple bees and I do wanna play with custom mob models later
4. I think I'll probably make a discord for it later where I can see how many people are interested and get it opened once things are more built out. It'll be open publicly then but I don't wanna pay for server hosting every month so it can only be open if I'm actually online
5. I think Minecraft in general is capable of cross console play?? I could be wrong but I'm working on PC so idk how well mobile would work especially with resource packs
6. I've never heard of that mod before tbh but I'm trying so far to not use mods and only use resource packs I'm making because that way everything can be server side and people don't have to download to join. This might change depending on what I wanna put in though. I sort of imagined more as a "slice of life thing" in survival mode. Just a fun alien sandbox for people to play in
7. FUNNY U SAY THAT I did TRY to make a sopor liquid in MCreator and technically succeeded. It had its own properties and everything
Unfortunately, MCreator only works on 1.19.2 and I've been making everything else on 1.19.3 😔 I tried testing it out in a 1.19.2 world but it just didn't wanna cooperate. I'll probably just have to wait until MCreator updates to 1.20...
8. I think just the current in game chat will be what's used or people can discord each other if they like
9. They can if they type that way sure! I think there's websites where u can basically "translate" whatever you type into a custom quirk but it won't be implemented in the server specifically. People will have to type that way themselves, same as making skins
Thanks for your interest! I hope these answers were helpful I'm not experienced enough to put in all these gui type ideas lol but maybe someday 🤷 I'll be posting updates here and there on this blog so keep an eye out 👀
#hivecraft#homestuck#ask#asks#rambles#minecraft#ive got a few things i have files for that just...havent been wanting to work lol#the sopor and blood splatter items being two examples
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hi heres a look at my EPIC PETS on og neopets!!! a summery of what they are all about:
BigBluebell is my baby, precious butch daughter, i imagine her as a quaint farmer who likes living out in the country, shes painted christmas only for the brown fur and gold horns lol, shes the one i have read all the books
DarlingDaydream was created on the latest poogle day and painted pastel with one of the 4(!) FFQs i got from the faerie festival that just ended, i wanna customize her really pretty but im still planning that so shes just got the gay pride stuff on her lol
DustyDetective, as you can see from his age there, was made less than 2 days ago for me to spend another one of my FFQs on (i even shelled out some irl money for the first time to buy more pet slots orz) ive had a custom idea saved for forever on the fan site dress to impress for a steampunk uni and now im slowly working on gathering all the items for it (a few of them were part of the pool of new quest items TNT added to the faerie fest so they all suddenly jumped in price)
Flub_S2 (i call him flub season 2 for no reason) was adopted from a kind stranger here off of tumblr, he came with a zapped yellow dogglefox which looks to good together with him. right now i have him dressed like a slob bc ive imagined him as a spencer-from-icarly type weirdo artist whos just at home hanging out in his boxers with his dog painting all day lol
LordTheseus was a pound find and I loved the name so much i adopted him and made him a cunty gay guy. I painted him faerie with one of the FFQs before i realized the prize shop was basically giving away faerie pbs lol i also recently dropped like 3mil on buying him the darigan gruslen from the FF bc i missed logging in a day or two and couldnt get the prize myself ;;
SoftSybil was the first pet I made! I kinda imagine her as like the extrovert sister to the introvert Bluebell, so I painted her disco a while back and just kinda left it at that, but idk i might mix it up and totally redo her eventually i just dont know what i want with her lol
TurboFritz is also a pound find and my current lab ray pet, she started as a zafara and my goal was to zap her to robot, which is still my current goal, but for a while she was a ghost shoyru and looked pretty cool, but i still keep zapping her to try and get something cooler
im saving my remaining 4 pet slots until i really know what i want to do with them, so thats it for now!
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Weekly Update for 15 January, 2023
Hi, guys! I'm moving the update stuff up a bit, just because I want to take a break today and I won't be off till the 19th or 20th!
I'm super happy with the progress I've made this week!!! I got all of Scene 3's rough draft done, which was super nice as I actually changed how a few scenes play out and how their variations will play out when I go back to flesh the scene out!
We also got to over 13,000 words in Chapter 5 so far!!! And, like, mind you, I've only got Scene 1-3 written, and ONLY Scene 1 has been fully fleshed out and edited so far!! We still have one scene to go, AND I haven't gotten any of the huge variations done in Scene 2 or 3! I actually have only just started editing Scene 2, and like... I'm barely any ways in.
So, hi, yes, I'm super excited because I really think Chapter 5 will come super close or fully to 20,000 words!!! I'd love for it to, as only Chapter 1 came very close to it, and our other chapters have been smaller! (Which, I mean... there hasn't exactly been much to make huge variations on yet, I'm just being hard on myself, lol.)
One of the last things I want to mention is the stuff that comes with customization (ie clothing). I definitely want there to be some spots where your choices on customizing your MC gets fully mentioned, it might just be when I go back for the big final edits once the final chapter is completed, and before MG: Trepidation is uploaded in its entirety. I haven't forgotten your choices! I just want to get the full story down before I go back in and get them into the light!
Okay, that's all I got! I will be spending my few hours after work later to play Fatal Frame 5, so that's why I moved this up, lol. I will also say writing might be a little slow, I have my mom's birthday coming up on the 20th (she'll be 46!!), I have my permit test the 23rd, and a big doctor consultation on the 30th, and February will be very similar with my shop opening and me hopefully learning to drive AND getting all my doctor and dental appointments started.
It's gonna be a busy couple of months, but I really hope to still squeeze in a good couple thousand words a week at the VERY least!!
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AO3 tos anon here, thank you for all the explanation.
I actually sometimes wonder myself what’s my stakes in following a lot of spntwitter drama 🙈 I think in this particular case, I just wanted to know the truth. I understand you don’t have concrete proof but as I said I take your word because I know you from outside of the twitter echo chamber and trust you. I also wanted to figure out if AO3 is basically deleting fics just like that but your explanation makes sense as to why they’re doing it.
The fact that reporting trolls should chill, though, I fully agree with.
GAH, THE TUMBEASTS ATE MY FIRST ANSWER. I'm still gonna end up being long winded about this though cuz it gets me pretty heated. I try not to talk about it, but then someone asks me about it and oh lord here I go lol
I honestly don't care if there's a ringleader or just a well organized group. I just wish that the Reporting Trolls would consider printed fics the same as classic 'zines and get the fuck over it. Reporting printed fics can bring down the attention of the IP holders too, so they're not the Fandom Heroes they think they're being.
And when it comes down to it, I don't think they're really trying to protect fandom. If that was the case, there wouldn't be fanfics publicly posted on Lulu that have been sitting their for several years. They're targeting specific creators who have gone out of their way to keep the links hidden or private. So I think there's a kernel of truth to the idea that they're doing this out of jealousy. If it's That One Author that seems to be the ringleader, she may be upset that other people are getting more attention than she does. If it's her fans, they may be upset that their favorite author isn't getting as much attention as they think she deserves. It's even possible that they're not aware of what they're really doing, so they fall back on "BUt pRoFIT".
This whole thing about "but Lulu makes money!" will forever drive me nuts. Lulu would make the same amount of money selling paper and ink on a book that's just 700 pages of the word "Orange" typed on repeat as they would selling paper and ink on a book that's 700 pages of my story. The paper and ink is only worth paying for because of me, and I'm not making any money from the work I'm doing.
Look I can prove that, at least :D
Hell, I'm losing money on it. I pay fanartists to create covers for me. I'm bad at formatting the PDF, so I pay people to format it properly for me. I've spent hundreds of dollars to make these prints look nice and semi-professional. I give away copies for free to the artists and the people who help me with the formatting, and some of these are over $20 because of how thick they are.
Everyone is getting something out of this EXCEPT for me!
*huffs and puffs in irritation*
The AO3 stuff is, unfortunately, squidgy. Over the years I've heard of other things getting reported on AO3 where authors have complained that they weren't given enough opportunity to clean up whatever the violation was, or the AO3 staff wouldn't/couldn't tell them where the violation was hiding. If something is reported, it's going to come down to a judgement call from an AO3 employee. As someone who has had to make judgement calls on things that are grey areas, I can tell you it's tough. And sometimes it's best to err on the side of caution, which is usually not in the customer's favor. Without knowing exactly what was behind the AO3 staff's decision to delete, I can't say whether their decision is fair or not. It is scary though, because it's hard to tell whether an offhand comment will get you in trouble or not, and it puts us all on edge when we hear about something getting deleted.
Anyway, sorry I went on a vent session again. I'm glad you got some answers that at least made you feel better ;D
#ltleramblings#reply#anonymous#printed fics#fandom wank#fandom drama#i blacked out the stuff on the screenshot just in case#i have no idea what could be identifying info lol
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Sims Tagged Meme
No one tagged me, but I thought it'd be fun to do anyway! :>
1. What’s your favorite sims death? In the Sims 3, my favorite death has to be the meteor shower death (poor @faeriefrolic's Madeline cannot catch a break with that one xP) and in the Sims Medieval, my favorite one has to be the Pit Monster one!
2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match? Maxis Match all the way, there's just something about MM that makes it so appealing. It's so bright and colourful and I love it so much :> (Maybe alpha is just sorta...creepy to me idk?)
3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? Nope, I don't! I love body diversity in my game, however I used to when I used to play the Sims 4! But now, I don't mind any and all body shapes :D
4. Do you use move objects? I do, but only for decor items so it looks like the space is lived in. Though, one time I did use move objects on a computer and my sim used it as a table to eat her sandwich on.
5. Favorite mod? Definitely NRAAS and the Randomizer mod. NRAAS is a must to keep the game running and I like the well, randomness of the Randomizer mod!
6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? I first got into the Sims when I was given the Sims 2 by my grandmother. I think my first pack I got was Pets, but I honestly don't remember... it was a while ago lol
7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? I pronounce it as aLIVE.
8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? For me, my favorite sims that I've made are actually based upon two OCs that I have - Connor and Leon. They're my babies and I'll love them forever! Plus, I like how Leon's voice sounds as a simbot! If we're talking regular sims though, I have two. One is from my 'N Cheese legacy back in the Sims 4, her name was Blueberry 'N Cheese (I have her as my origin profile!). The other one is Linden, who I sadly had to retire for now as I've been away for several months. Maybe one day I'll return to his save but for right now I don't want to do any challenges.
9. Have you made a simself? I did once and they promptly died to a vending machine. But like, mood.
10. What sim traits did you give yourself? Dog person, Night Owl, Computer Whiz, Childish, and Family-Orientated.
11. What is your favorite EA hair color? Probably the blonde preset, but other than that one, I just don't like any of them sadly - I prefer the custom ones that I make.
12. Favorite EA hair? Idk why but I really love that Victorian era one that has a big hat. I actually used to have it as CC when I played the Sims 4 so you can imagine my surprise when I realized it was actually from the Sims 3.
13. Favorite life stage? Young adults and elders!
14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? Honestly, I love both! I mainly build tiny homes, though but I'm still getting used to Sims 3's build mode.
15. Are you a CC creator? Technically I am if you count those scuffed clay hairs I made for the Sims 4 years ago, but maybe someday I'll touch Sims 3's modding tools!
16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad? I have @faeriefrolic who I met irl before, and she is the sweetest person to know! :D But other than that, I keep to myself but don't be afraid to say hi to me! I know I've been on a hiatus but hopefully sometime in July I can start again, as I've been visiting some family in America owo
17. What’s your favorite game? TS3! Ever since I've re-visited it, it's one of my favorite Sims games! It's a tie between 3 and Medieval, honestly.
18. Do you have any Sims merch? Uhhh, I had like one Sims-related sticker on my old laptop but I don't know if I'd be able to peel it off without wrecking it.
19. Do you have a YouTube for sims? I used to, but I got really self-conscious of my voice so I don't anymore.
20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? I was very minimal at first, as people usually are when you first play a game. Then I got into NSB challenges, and I loved the wild hair colors that you could put your sim in! (I got up to the yellow gen in the Sims 4). Now, I'm a mix between banilla and berry sims.
21. What’s your Origin ID? ShuckleBerry662, if you play the Sims 4 - my scuffed builds are on the gallery. :P
22. Who’s your favorite CC creator? Oh shit, uhhh I love a whole bunch of 'em! I love @chazybazzy, @poisonfireleafs for hairs. I love @sweetdevil-sims and I recently discovered @teekapoka's stuff too! (idk why it didn't link but oh well.) Also the lovely @lazyduchess for their smooth patch!
23. How long have you had a simblr? I honestly don't remember, maybe 2016-ish? It was mainly Sims 4 and I abandoned that one sooo uh...yeah.
24. How do you edit your pictures? I don't edit my pictures at all bc I don't have the patience for Photoshop and my game can't handle reshade sometimes.
25. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? I love Ambitions and University Life! The Ghostbuster career is one of my favorites and I get excited whenever I hear the ghost sound cue.
26. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? The 64-bit expansion would be an awesome addition to the Sims 3! 😊
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I rambled abt this on Discord to my friends, but, ironically enough, I hate the Discord/Tiktok-ification of everything.
I try to access information on some thing - but uh oh! I am linked to a Discord server to join, or a Tiktok account!
I don't use Tiktok, I am not going near that fucking app - and despite being a very, VERY active Discord user, I do not want to pointlessly join servers anymore! Especially if it's for one piece of info I just need about a game or a project!
And if I ask about this information elsewhere, or look up other people who are asking this question rather, they are often passively aggressively told "It's on the Discord just join it bro"
What if I don't want to? I shouldn't need to join a community intended for chatting just to access some information I may need once! I want websites back! I want custom WIkis back, because most Fandom Wikis on any topics are shitty and or extremely out-dated!!!
I hate this shit so much!!!
(More personal rambles about this below.)
This may be a personal thing, but for certain things I also hate getting my information off Youtube, but... This is a Roblox game fan specific issue for me, I think, and I shouldn't expect more from a community geared towards children, and we all know how many there views are from children.
But for other games, or projects, etc... I feel like we should just bring websites back for those. Hell... Even active blogs or Twitters may do, as long as they have actual, like, logs for longer things like accessible Google Docs with more info. Like, for example, I have gotten back into Club Penguin recently, and I have been playing on a nice private server, since the original game has shut down.
I really would like to meet the mascots - however, none of this info is listed anywhere! I remember there being fan-sites and other things dedicated to mascot trackers! Since this is a fairly small, fan-owned community - it surely wouldn't kill them to add trackers to their own site for the game?? Then again, even their community stuff isn't updated...
And guess what? The only place to access the time mascots may be meet-able in the game, are on a fucking Discord server! And for another game I was introduced to by a friend, which receives frequent updates - because it was first made popular thanks to Tiktok in the first place, a lot of information on it is there (in often, admittedly, hard to bear/annoying formats), and the only other place is a Discord server. Which I am actually a part of, even if I don't chat there, just because I had no other place for info to join. (Especially with the wiki updating very slowly for it.)
The community there does provide a bunch of info and their own stuff - and there is info on the game, though it is sometimes a bit hard to navigate through it. But, info in-game? Not much! But it does fit into the nature of the game, so it makes a bit more sense.
But what is no excuse is fully relying on your fans for info... Youtubers, Discord mods, and a shittily put-together, barely updated Wiki. My god, even on the Discord server there is basically ZERO proper update logs!! And often they just let fans hammer them on for the updates they put out, not to mention the mods there are fans, which are usually fucking teenagers. I know this is about a Roblox game, but it's ridiculous... But I won't ramble on it further, lol.
I do understand Roblox servers are easier to use than Forums, hell - despite joining some forums myself I... Am too scared to talk there. Well, same goes for Discord servers, but I am less-so scared I'll mess something up there. But still... That's for communication... There should be a separate place for information on things. Sure, info can be here, but like, the more fun, not extra necessary stuff, y'know???
I am not sure if I am the only one angry about this, but I am so annoyed I had to get it off my chest.
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The big art dump.
I'm returning a lender iPad soon so I figured I'd treat tumblr as an image hosting website and throw all my recent artwork on here instead.
Theoretically it would be betting for metrics if I spread out my posts instead of doing them all at once... but I don't really plan on becoming a social media influencer anyway and tumblr was supposed to be the one place left that free of all that stuff lol
I'm just happy with the fact I can store these images here ~
Full explanation of the lore n' stuff under the cut!
1-2 - Misc. Drawings
Just a landscape test to get used to a new program (Fresco) and a still life referenced from a photo of some flowers in a vase.
3 - The Initiates
Mostly-undeveloped urban fantasy story, I think it's got a killer group of main character but I can't seem to find a good villain to pit them against or plot beats to work through. Currently still using placeholder names too, from left to right are Silver (monster hunter), Gold (witch), Green (werewolf) and Red (vampire).
4-5 - Ocean of Green
If you can't tell by the Hollow Knight bug in image 5, Ocean of Green is basically me just indulging in my love of Hollow Knight's entire artistic direction and style. Although there's also a bit of Sky: Children of the Light and Kuneho in there as well.
Plot's pretty weak, and that's probably the main reason why I don't feel the motivation to nail down some character designs I actually want to work with. Everything above just doesn't hit the right spot, at least for now.
Image 4 is mostly the twins Wisteria (ponytail) and Gahnia (no ponytail). Then 5 is more Wisteria (ponytail + the design with antlers), more Gahnia (anything with red hair) and another character called Nymphae (five-leaf crown).
6-8 - Crow's Orbit
This was a space opera, mostly combining some of the passing knowledge I heard about Star Wars (never watched it myself), plus a bit of Chinese mythology and a very small pinch of xianxia (once again, don't extensively follow the genre, so only a very small amount of inspiration).
The drawings were mostly me just figuring out the design for the main alien species of the setting, using some secondary characters from the story as a testing ground. Ultimately I'm actually quite happy with what I ended up with. Pictured from left to right are (and you'll have to forgive me for the unpronounceable alien names);
Xaashidean “Ash” (red), and Vivryaahnix "Annex" (blue-white) of the Xilica. A silicon-based species that uses psychic powers to levitate and maintain a constant operating temperature of 500° Celsius.
Yrii-Yhroande "Hira" of the Kyurione, a combination of two lifeforms existing in symbiosis like a herbivorous boar-like animal and a carnivorous plant. Bit like a green sea slug, haha.
Then lastly, Ze'Zreyin "Zevs" of the Varan'ze. Parasitic lifeforms that resemble larva, specialized in consuming and replacing the brains of their ecosystem's lifeforms. That, combined with a mastery of genetic engineering allow the Varan'ze to custom make their bodies to excel at any task. Under normal circumstances, Varan'ze act under a psychic hive mind, with their consciousness thinking of itself as a singular organism - a bit like how we think of ourselves as individuals despite being made of of a near incomprehensible multitude of cells.
9-10 - Burnished / Icosah
Probably one of my most developed worlds from a pure worldbuilding / cultural standpoint, mostly because it's designed more to be a TTRPG setting than for a standalone comic or webnovel. First image is a map of the two habitable continents with the major regions colour-coded, but not labelled... You're not missing out on much the names are all unpronounceable lol
Second image is just a quick doodle of some characters, left one is a weird Aasimar with a name I must omit due to potential future spoilers for a D&D campaign, right one's a Drow called Zinrena Aranriira. The character arc that poor girl goes through, oof...
11-18 - Everyone Loves A Songbird
... You can tell I have a bit of a preference for this one.
Just a heap of character designs with a pair of light doodles / joke drawings at the end. Story's still in early development so they all have placeholder names (this is my excuse for the names being dumb and nonsensical).
First green image is of the story's protagonists, [Half-Moon] (a reserved but kindhearted cleric with a few secrets to hide) and [Devouring Blue] (says he's a bard but seems like they're just a bit too good at martial arts for that to not be a lie). Three images below that are [Half-Moon]'s starting design from the story's beginning, his demon form (the angst is never-ending, he really is the crawling in my crawl of our generation), and an outfit update [Devouring Blue] gets about a third of the way into the story.
Next two are [The Pine Tree], a young king with a few too many enemies and not enough allies to spare, and [Yellow Ribbon], [Devouring Blue]'s estranged older brother.
As for the joke drawings, I know they're a little messy, so I'll clarify that the first one's [Half-Moon] and [The Pine Tree] and the second is [Half-Moon] and [Devouring Blue].
And yeah, that's about it!
#StillLife#doodles#blackandwhite#landscape#digitalart#characterdesign#creaturedesign#photoreference#originalcharacter#dnd#D&D#DungeonsAndDragons#OCs#Fantasy#FantasyArt#FantasyMaps#UrbanFantasy#SpaceOpera#Aliens#Xaashidean#Vivrayaahnix#Yhrii-Yhroande#Ze'Zereyin#Aasimar#Drow#Zinrena Aranriira#sci fi#myart
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Today was an awesome day. I had the market and just came over and we went to a farm. And honestly besides being just a little bit tired I had a really really good day.
After the wedding last night we got back here and hung out for a while. But we were both very tired we both knew that we had to work in the morning. We went to sleep and when I woke up at 7:00 James was still in bed. They were mostly dressed but they were exhausted. And I felt really bad. I was more awake than they were.
We got up and I went to get dressed while James made the bed. And I feel like I was very slow moving. Feel like I had to keep repeating stuff and I don't know what's up with me. So we ended up leaving like 5 minutes late. I didn't end up mattering. We still get to the museum before Aiden that was even with stopping for breakfast. They did mess up my breakfast though and so I only had an English muffin with cheese on it. Which was not ideal. But it was fine.
I mostly was focused on working on my knitting. James went inside while I went to set up and it was really nice to catch up with all of the other people at the market. And show off my wedding photos. And I was just in a really nice mood. But I wasn't that concerned with selling stuff.
Don't get the wrong I really wanted to sell things but I just didn't kind of feel like it was going to happen so I wasn't that concerned. And so I just focused on my knitting. I got all caught up for the week and just enjoyed having people come over and chat with me.
Didn't make my first sale until around 10:30. And then in pretty quick succession I made a bunch more. Dante and Xavier and his wife and couple of our other friends came through and they all bought stuff for me which was very kind of them. And they were all really excited about my stuff and not just myself they were excited about everyone else at the market. And that was really cool. It was really nice to feel supported by them.
And I had a couple other repeat customers this time around. The one nice lady that always comes over with her son and he buys a whole bunch of my stuff. The knit pair that they bought's arm came off and they didn't realize that it was just tied off like a balloon animal. So I was able to fix it for them right away and they thought that was very funny because apparently they had spent some time looking for the arm.
It just came around 11:30 after having some issues with her Google maps. But she got there and I was pretty much checked out of selling and just focused on talking to her. Because Mommy spent a lot of time together because of the wedding we didn't really talk a ton because we were focused on the wedding so it was really nice just to be with her and talk and hang out. It was a beautiful day.
And because it was so beautiful I really wanted us to go do something fun. And so I suggested we go pumpkin picking. I was a little overwhelmed by how many farms we could drive to and I ended up picking one just at random. Mostly because they offered things that weren't just fall related. Not just so pumpkin or corn themed. And that ended up being an excellent choice.
After we said goodbye to James and packed up the car we took Jess's car about 40 minutes away to a really nice little farm. And honestly it wasn't even that small. Like the building wasn't small and the grounds weren't small. And it wasn't just pumpkin picking. They had apples and berries and cucumbers and lettuce and herbs. And we ended up not even going out to the pumpkin fields. Once we got a parking spot we walked over to the farm building and looked around and there was a lot of stuff. We both decided we wanted to eat first. The line for the Apple fritters and things was incredibly long but there was no line at all the taco truck. So we went and had tacos.
Mom said they were ready to talk at this. We sat in the grass in the ate our food. Jessica lol and I got three black bean tacos. There was some weirdness where we were sitting because these three 8 to 12-year-old boys were throwing a football. And I knew it was going to be a disaster and then they hit someone in the head. And I was like hey maybe don't play football where people are sitting. And one of them was just like but people are everywhere. And I just want to be like and maybe take a hint that this is not where you should be playing football. Thankfully the girl that got hit in the head didn't seem too upset but I would have been furious. And I would have been more furious if Jess was the one that got hit. Thankfully they walked away soon after that.
We decided not to pick pumpkins instead we just chose some really cute marbled ones and decided we were going to pick flowers instead. It was $15 and you got snippers and a cup and you got to go and pick as many as you could fit in the cop. And while the flowers were pretty picked over we found some really nice ones and I really just have a blast. I think if there was too many nice flowers I would have been overwhelmed and this was very much like a hunting gather situation and it was super fun for me. Just didn't love the bees with a butterflies but I really just had a really good time. And we picked flowers until we were two overheated and needed to get into some shade.
We thought we would go and pick another pumpkin from the ones that they had out by the farmhouse but after we return the clippers we decided that we didn't really need anything and that we had the little pumpkins that we wanted and so we left. And we headed back to my house.
We beat James home because they were going to stop at the post office to mail two bears that I sold and we basically would spend the next couple hours just chilling. when James got back we all sat around the couch and looked at all of the wedding photos. We'd look at a bunch last night but very exciting to get to look at them today. Specifically because these were the ceremony photos and the reception.
And I'm so excited about so many of them. I can't help her feel like I should be slightly disappointed that the first kiss photo is pretty bad. The one is very blurry and the other one is from a very low angle and very bizarre. I'm very confused by the choice. I'm not actually upset about it. It's one of those things like I feel like I should be upset because it's like the thing. But I don't actually care. Mostly because later on in the photos towards the end of the night she got a really beautiful picture of me and James under the pergola kissing and it's just so beautiful that it makes up for any upset I might have had. And I was really excited to see how many pictures there are of me and my mom and my brother and my dad. There's not many of me and my brother. I'm very glad that I asked specifically to have a portrait one of us when we were doing photos of the monument. I kind of wish I asked to do those with my parents as well but the ones with James and them are also very nice. I am going to have to ask specifically for her to Photoshop Anne's purse which is a crossbody out of some pictures. And some people are grooming in a lot of pictures that we might need to swap some faces but overall the pictures are great and I'm really excited. And that's not even all the pictures because Brandon took a whole bunch and James is probably going to have him come tomorrow to show us. Maybe while they're watching there game of thrones show.
So I was really excited and that felt really good. And it was nice to see the Jess isn't a bunch of pictures because both of us were disappointed that she wasn't in any of my little videos that I took for the TikToks I made.
James had to go back to work at the theater. And me and Jess have decided what we're going to eat because I wasn't really interested in anything. And so we decided we would go to R House. While I was very tired I think it was more because I had been sitting still for so long.
So we left here a little after the sun went down and drove over there. I got to share the new album that I've really been enjoying with Jess and she said it has a really good road trip vibe. And that is very true. And food still didn't seem interesting to me so I ended up getting pizza that I kind of regretted. Just got a poke bowl and an ice cream that was so small. But ended up being a perfect amount. And honestly even if the food wasn't amazing and life-changing it was really nice to go out into the world and people watch. I think I to see some high schoolers in their prom dresses? I'm not positive that that's what those were but it was very cute.
You're back here and just got washed up and put her pajamas on and I would get the shower after that. And now we're both just chilling in our own spaces. Jess is any other room reading a book. And I'm in here writing my post. I am a little bummed only because when we came home we found one of my fish, domino, dead in his tank. And I'm just really frustrated because nothing changed. And I just feel bad that he didn't live very long. I don't know how long he was alive at the pet store or what he went through before he got to me. But I really hope that he enjoyed his little life even if it wasn't for a very long time.
I buried in in our garden on the fire escape. And now I'm just waiting for James to come home. And I'm hoping that I just get like a really good night's sleep and I feel amazing tomorrow. Because we're going to the Renaissance festival.
I'm very much looking forward to it. Supposed to be a really nice day again and not supposed to rain anymore. I'm going to drive us out there and we're going to try to get there right when it opens and stay until we're tired. There's lots to see lots to do. And I'm just hoping for a really good day. I hope that you all have a really nice Sunday and you stay safe. Take care of each other and sleep well. Good night
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