#I was gonna make it actually look like cookie but I think the realistic cat is funnier

[themintman]

The mafia finding the mf who keeps swapping out their food:

#a hat in time #ahit mafia #ahit cooking cat #cooking cat #Tag yourself I'm the one in the back who is scuttling along the floor like a bug #I was gonna make it actually look like cookie but I think the realistic cat is funnier #I love the mafia #Sigh

[flufflepuffle296]

Heathers au: Beautiful Songfic

This is more centred around Veronica/Marinette so not really any mentions of Heather/Heather/Heather. Sorry if someone’s done this before I apologise I just got into Heathers like two days ago. Also I changed some lyrics and took others out to make it more “realistic”. Sorry I suck at endings, it’s 5:30am rn and this is my first fic so be nice please! (I’m on mobile so I can’t add the keep reading tag so sorry if you don’t like this) xxx

I brushed down my dress: I couldn’t give them anything to criticise me over. Everything had to be perfect. I had to be perfect. Chloé sat next to me, my beautiful fiancée, slipping on her kitten heels. She may be 3 months pregnant but no Bourgeois woman would be seen wearing flats. I was in a red floor length a line dress — I grew out of my childish pink years ago, before it even went out of fashion! My hair was twisted into two plaits that were knotted together into a stylish bun at the back. Chloé meanwhile had stuck to her white and gold aesthetic, currently in a slim fitting white dress, showing off her small baby bump, decorated with gold jewellery. I rummaged through my drawers, trying to find a lipstick, when a thin book toppled out. I picked it up, and laughed fondly when I saw what it was.

My old Collège and Lycée diary.

I flipped through it, landing on the page that stuck most clearly in my mind. It was the day my class reminded me of my current reality at that time, shocking me out of a bubble that had surrounded me during the summer holidays that year.

September 1st, 1989.

Dear Diary: I believe I'm a good person. You know, I think that there's good in everyone, but—here we are! First day of senior year!

And uh... I look around at these kids that I've known all my life and I ask myself—what happened?

I bit my lip. What happened? I knew darn well what happened. Lila Rossi. She came in, flaunting her friendships and connections, a new disability every other week to cry about, another rumour about me coming out every 3 days.

Alya ended our friendship, Adrien continued to cry about Lila’s feelings. Lila just kept doing what she did best. The class gave up on changing my mind and instead decided that calling me names would be better. Because logic?!

“Freak!” “Slut!” “Burnout!” “Bug-eyes!” “Poser!” “Lard-ass!” Were the insults they liked to yell daily. Yeah, they weren’t the most creative...

We were so tiny, happy and shiny. Playing tag and getting chased. Singing and clapping, laughing and napping. Baking cookies, eating paste.

Nino and Kim used to come over to the bakery when we were kids, where we’d gorge ourselves on sweets, before celebrating our sugar rushes by chasing each other in the park and then crashing on my sofa, cuddled in blankets and laying on top of each other.

Then we got bigger, that was the trigger. Like the Huns invading Rome. Welcome to my school, this ain't no high school: This is the Thunderdome. Hold your breath and count the days, we're graduating soon. College will be paradise, if I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful. I pray, I pray for a better way. If we changed back then, we could change again. We can be beautiful...Just not today.

I scoffed at my optimism back then. Them changing? They never did, I don’t know why I bothered trying at that point. I should’ve moved on but hey! We all make mistakes. It’s just that sometimes you make 11 friendships worth of mistakes.

“Freak!” “Slut!” “Cripple!” “Homo!” “Homo!” “Homo!”

I cringed as I read their old “insults”. They would write homophobic messages across my locker, getting Alix to spray paint a few slurs across my work after I came out as bisexual.

Things will get better soon as my letter comes from Harvard, Duke, or Brown. Wake from this coma, take my diploma. Then I can blow this town. Dream of ivy-covered walls, no smoky French cafés. Fight the urge to strike a match and set this dump ablaze!

I had purposefully sent out applications to universities far away from these people, from Paris. All three schools accepted me, something I can’t say about my classmates, most of whom were rejected for essays on false information (sourced by Lila) and a quick scan over the Ladyblog meant not a single newspaper would even consider my ex-best friend. Gabriel Agreste, as I later found out through my internship in America, had to bribe several schools with double tuition to get even one to accept Adrien, after he got exposed as sexual harasser and disgraced hero “Chat Noir”. I turned back to my diary, having to peel off rock hard gum from the page that someone had smeared in “revenge”.

Le Chiên Kim. Third year as linebacker and eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick.

“What did you say to me, skank?” He would yell, his fist raised in the hallway.

“Aah, nothing!” I then cowered. I may be Ladybug, but he was 150lbs of pure rage. No one can compete with that!

But I know, I know... Life can be beautiful. I pray, I pray, For a better way. We can be beautiful...

“Marinette! Wide load! Honnnnnk!”

He was the smartest guy on the football team. Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf.

“Hey! Pick that up! Right now!”

“I’m sorry, are you actually talking to me?” He used to snarl, his hands covered in sauce from knocking my tray.

I stood my ground, I had been practising for this moment. “Yes, I am. I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on me. You're a high school has-been waiting to happen. A future gas station attendant.”

Kim then smirked, crouching down to eye level and pressing a finger to my forehead. “You have a zit right there...” he pointed out, causing the cafeteria to laugh at my expense.

I used to ask myself “Why... Why do they hate me?”

And hear Adrien whisper “Why don't I fight back?”

Watch as Max Googled “Why do I act like such a creep?”

Listen in on Lila stamping her feet in the bathroom asking “Why won't he date me?” Clearly frustrated.

Kim panicking as he wondered “Why did I hit him?”

And Chloé sob down the phone “Why do I cry myself to sleep?”

I would stay up late, screaming, begging. At my lowest points I would cry out “Somebody hug me! Somebody fix me! Somebody save me! Send me a sign, God! Give me some hope, here! Something to live for!”

I remember when I first met my real friends. The famed trio had gone into the bathroom and I followed after them, clearly my throat.

“Who are you?”

“Uh... Marinette Dupain Cheng. I crave a boon”

“What boon?” Chloé asked, filing her nails.

“Um. Let me sit at your table, at lunch. If our class think that you guys tolerate me, then they'll leave me alone...”

Chloé threw her nail file out and began circling around me, running her hands through my hair, commenting that “For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure!” Before coming to a conclusion.

“And ya know, ya know, ya know? This could be beautiful. Mascara, maybe some lip gloss, and we're on our way. Get this girl some blush; and Kagami, I need your brush. Let's make her beautiful.” Sabrina and Kagami, chimed in, echoing her words.

“Let's make her beautiful...”

“Let’s make her beautiful...”

“Make her beautiful...Okay?” Chloé ordered, dragging me out with Kagami and Sabrina, driving me to her hotel. They sat me down, taking my hair out of its bunches and brushing it out. Kagami painted my nails a deep navy with surprising precision, manning my cuticles. Sabrina twirled my hair into a high bun, leaving a few pieces at the front to frame my face. Chloé came back from her wardrobe, throwing a blue blazer and grey skirt at me. I changed into my outfit for them, to which they clapped their hands in glee. They dragged me back to school, taking in everyone’s reactions to the new and improved me. This became my new daily outfit for the rest of the year — the class couldn’t find anything bad about it, and even if they did Chloé would threaten them with her father’s power.

I was happy with my squad. Kagami taught us Japanese and Chloé taught us American English that she’d picked up from her mother. I taught them self defence, under the guise of learning it from my mum, unknowingly training them for the day I would rip Chat Noir’s miraculous from him, before slamming it into Kagami’s palm. I needed help that day, so thrust them bee and the fox miraculous at Chloé and Sabrina respectively. They became permanent heroes, Kagami under the name “Noirette”, Chloé under the new guise of “Buttercup” and Sabrina “Renard Rouge”. Akuma attacks have never lasted more than 15 minutes since we got rid of that alley cat, and we’ve been closing in on Hawkmoth recently.

I shook my head, snapping the crude book shut, throwing the diary in the bin. Today was going to be the day I made peace with all that happened, our 10 year school reunion. Doesn’t mean I’m gonna make up with anyone, just that I will finally leave everything behind. I found my lipstick and smeared on the crimson lip, smacking my lips together. I grabbed my clutch and helped Chloé stand up, though she wobbled a little in her heels. I slid her miraculous into her updo, blowing a kiss at her as to not ruin her makeup.

We met up with Kagami and Sabrina in the hallway, Kagami in a wine red suit with gold jewellery, and Sabrina was in emerald green to compliment her red hair. We stepped into the limo awaiting us outside and set off, arriving at the school 10 minutes later. We walked up the steps, hitching up our dresses and arrived in the courtyard. It had been lit up with fairy lights, with stands of food and drinks scattered around the court. Our old classmates were huddled in small groups, whilst Mlle. Mendeleiev’s was in a large group, enjoying each other’s company after 10 years apart.

No one noticed us, until Rose pointed at me and whispered “Who’s that with Chloé?” The group turned to stare at us, trying to place my face. Adrien looked up from talking to Lila, who seemed to be flaunting a rather tacky Gabriel engagement ring, and whispered,

“Marinette?!”

The class began gossiping amongst themselves, “Marinette? Marinette? Marinette?!”

I ignored them, their childish ways were behind me, and walked up to Aurore and Mireille, fawning over their relationship. They turned Kagami, asking her about her life and squealing over her Olympic medal for fencing. I grinned as I watched my old class, happy that they had moved on from each other — well apart from Alya and Adrien, who were still hooked on Lila. I was finally, content! I thought back on my diary, one particular paragraph standing out to me at this time.

And you know, you know, you know, life can be beautiful. You hope, you dream, you pray, and you get your way! Ask me how it feels, lookin' like hell on wheels...My God, it's beautiful! I feel so beautiful... And when you're beautiful...It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Chloé boasted my achievements, my business, my awards, and the entire of Mendeleiev’s class started chanting “Marinette! Marinette! Marinette!”, much to my embarrassment. I boasted her’s in return, Sabrina revealed how far she’d come as a lawyer, Kagami swung her prized sword from side to side as she listened to us all catching up, laughing at the memories.

It really was a beautiful day.

#lila salt #adrien salt #class salt #marinette deserves better #alya salt #mlb #miraculous #miraculous ladybug #marinette dupain cheng #miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir #chloe sugar #kagami tsurugi #sabrina raincomprix #heathers au #beautiful heathers #songfic

[pocketramblr]

Poll Results

Alright, that’s it, i’m tired of trying to sort the answers so yall just get the big list of all the free response answers to that quiz about ofa. be aware some are less safe for work than others.

memorable ones: OfA Snickerdoodle, I’d Give It To A Cat, So You Know Vore Right?, I’m in Love With Nana, Slicey Blood Oath, and Homoerotic Sword Fight

(My answer above is how I think it did happen, not how I want it to happen.) I personally think something along the lines of a Bruce Banner Jennifer Walker blood transfusion where the OFA holder doesn’t realize they’ve passed it on until later.

a tender kiss. perhaps loving. perhaps they're dying, and i already knew that they loved me, either platonically or otherwise, and we always knew that i'd be next. perhaps they tried so hard to make sure it never happened, and perhaps that tender kiss as an apology as much as it is a gift. sure sucks to be gay i guess 

Peacefully? By doing the do and making it a wonderful moment of lovemaking and passing on the future.. If we're in the middle of battle you bet your freaking butt I want them to kiss me dramatically, tell me they love me, and then yeet me away as they turn back to the fight. Ow but relationship goals. 

If we're not romantic because I am obsessed with the Duo Holders ship currently, blood works fine. Ingest it or have them pressing a bloody palm into a wound of mine *shrugs* Gotta pass it along somehow

Personally, I'd rather drink blood instead of hair. It feels less gross. But I'd pass it on as hair just to fuck with my successor

Hair or blood eating, but no touchy-touchy or whatever thx.

Probably a vial of blood so it’s easy and over quick

kiss 👉👈

i would like it to be blood from an already opened wound just cause it would probably less weird, ..........but knowing my luck and because irl my sister has attempted to feed me her baby teeth by shoving it to my lips and saying "eat", thats actually how i would get ofa. ( >:/ i have almost eaten at least two teeth this way because i thought she was being nice and giving me candy )

Consider: doing one of those blood oath things where you swear to be BFFs for eternity except now you also get a quirk out of it. But lbr kissing is way more romantic and you’ve made First/Second my new OTP, so I’ll stick with that for them. <3 But also, maybe to make the kiss option more romantic First thought something more along the lines of wishing he could give ~everything he has/all of himself~ to Second which counted as including his quirk, rather than specifically about giving him the power to defeat his brother?

This is going to sound gross but all ways of transferring DNA is. Just work up a sweat and have the other party drink it. It would probably be the best tasting option which is kinda a weird thing to think about. Nvm sweat doesn't contain DNA looked it up but I don't want to delete all of this so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ maybe a scraping of skin cells

Honestly the hair is probably the way I'd want to go. That or blood. Like just swallowing it.

Look, i know realistically it was probably some desparate on-the-brink-of-death "please defeat my brother" thing and oo, magic he gets the quirk. But consider. First's last fight with afo. Second is holding his bleeding body, crying. First gently cups Second's cheek and pulls him into a bloody kiss before dying. Second pulls himself together just long enough to flip off afo, barely resisting the urge to absolutely slaughter him, knowing he would lose. He finds his successor and trains him to the best of his ability, determined to not lose another person he cared for

I mean like dead skin cells probably dont work right? Except hair works so thats not true. So like you totally could lick someone to get OFA. Like could you imagine the whole holding your hand over someones mouth to shut them up but they lick you and they somehow wind up with your quirk, like crazy. What must have been the trial and error with this stuff cause they must have kept passing it inbetween each other to figure out its dna right. How long did it take for them to realize. Like you’re eating breakfast and theres a hair in your food like ew and why am i stronger now. Overall, comedic timing for getting a quirk would be hilarious.

My apprentice lays broken and bloody beneath me as I cradle them in my arms, crying on to an open wound on their face praying the power will be enough to save them

little bit of skin like a hang nail just like put it in a sandwich and dont thing about it

Put it in my coffee.

If I received it from Nana then I would love to have received it via eating her out~ though for passing it on to others I think I would just either spit into their mouths or shove a bleeding finger down their throat until they swallow and then run and get myself killed by AfO while taunting him with "I DON'T HAVE YOUR BROTHER'S QUIRK ANYMORE! SUCK MY NON-EXISTENT DICK YOU LOSER!"

knock me out and just inject the blood. if i have to actively think abt ingesting someone elses dna im gonna yeet myself into the ocean. to pass it on i'll just spit in a cup (or in their mouth) bc im not gonna make someone eat my hair nor is anyone getting my blood

who in their right mind would trust me with a power like ofa 💀afo just looks at me funny the quirk is his. im not a mc for a reason

Sexy battle where I’m the villain, and randomly the hero thinks “I wish I could save you”. Boom I punch them with bloody knuckles and the quirk passes to me. Now the hero has to teach me how to be good again. Also we fall in love.

You know, I always assumed I would head canon it as something romantic until canon proved me wrong But these options are so varied - I had to choose the most Dramatic (tm) one As for my actual answer: a gentle kiss with full consent from both parties

I will bite a holder as a sign of affection. There's probably some dead skin cells in the arm I can swallow by accident. They are used to this and sometimes we switch the quirk around for funsies.

You know, I spent like 10 minutes trying to think of something original here, but knowing my shit luck some bastard would spit in my drink or something and cast upon me the Curse of Bone Breaking and/or.... y’know..... AFO...........

okay this is gonna sound weird but. consider this i marry a very lovely women. we are in much love. we get attacked by evil people because she is a good hero but plot twist. i am secretly her nemisis. the attackers are my minions. i wanted her to protect me because i am very smol but. my comrades were too mean. she is nearly dead. "take this" she says. she kisses me and i am one for all. fuck, i say internally, but i dont tell her. she dies in my arms. i run and become vigilante and take down my once comrades. all is not well. i die unsatisfied. i eventually pass it onto a cat in an alleyway because they are the only one who is with me when i get hit with a back alley sniper

Blood or just like. skin. You could use nail clippers to take a bit off from a really fleshy area, like just under the nail. It's that easy

Spit in my food like an underpaid fast food worker.

i have long hair so that would not be ideal, but blood seems kinda...unsanitary, but i guess it would be better if i was 100% positive i wouldn't pass on some sort of disease. so if that could be ascertained then like a few drops of blood in a glass of water or something and then down the hatch, bam ofa passed on. i know other folks are probably typing some nsfw stuff but just. no. keep it in your pants y'all.

Blood transfusion First, pick a hospital Second, steal all their blood Third, have the previous user donate their blood to that hospital Fourth, get into a major accident and need a blood transfusion near the hospital you robbed Fifth, hope either OfA will only pass onto you bc your the intended recipient, or that no one else needs a blood transfusion Sixth, get the transfusion Seventh, steal all of the previous users blood back Eigth, return all the other stolen blood Ninth, get new identities, this crime leaves DNA everywhere Tenth, die of a blood clot due to incompatible blood types (optional)

okay realistically bleeding into a cut or a drop of blood into water and drinking it would be easiest but like... what if somehow dna could be baked into like a muffin or cookie or something... like i know when cooking with wines and stuff the alcohol cooks away and evaporates out but is that process the same for like blood? like if you baked your blood into a cookie would traces of your dna still be there? basically i want an ofa cookie (snickerdoodle preferably)

no i like my bones

drink a drop of blood. it'd go down easier than hair

no

Something dramatic and desperate in the heat of battle like blood or something

First of all, I think First passed OfA as he was dying entirely on accident, because Second was badly (though not critically) injured and they'd been sort of dancing around each other's feelings and doubting their own worth, so First, knowing he was dying and that his brother was a petty bitch who would probably kill Second anyway because he knows that First cared about him, kisses Second with blood on his lips and his last thoughts before dying are about how he wants Second to have the strength to survive if his brother comes after him.

If I was given the option of getting OfA, I wouldn't take it. I'm a coward and being given something like that is a death sentence.

If it was forced, probably ingesting the previous users blood, because blood is a lot easier to choke down than hair.

If I already had it and had to pass it on, I would want it to be something suitably dramatic like collapsing on the doorstep of a trusted loved one and explaining with my dying breath who killed me and why and then raising my blood covered hand to their face like I was going to caress their cheek only for them to taste blood. They cry and try to get me take it back and when I finally die they swear vengeance over my slowly cooling corpse.

Pass it on in a non-life threatening scenario where I decide I actually don’t like the weird bone breaking power a random person gave me as they were dying and wish I could pass it to someone else and through a weird set of circumstances end up accidentally cooking some of my own hair into brownies I was making because I shed like a dog and passing it to my new neighbor I came to welcome to the neighborhood.

Either drinking a glass of milk with their saliva (no icky hair taste), or an epic sharing of blood while clasping hands like knights in a noble brotherhood!

not by eating all mights long ass hair thats for sure, why did he give midoriya one of the longest ones he had, he has shorter hair right there on the back of his head. not to mention the fact of like how i would prefer to recieve it or give it away which would be just, fucking sharing a pop or something and swaping it through the backwash??? less nasty than hair and not as weird as the other options for spit which is like straight up spitting in a drink or the other persons mouth outside of kissing. if someone told me i had to eat their hair i would straight up say no thanks, cheers for the fitness glow up tho homie

I want nana 2 kiss me, on.,, the m,,,.."#*(@÷out.h pretty lady.,

Q-tip to the inside of the cheek

Those blood pacts where you slice your hands open and do a little handshake thing. Not very creative, but idk it just appeals to me

Via consumption of blood, babey

I would want it to be with a maybe maybe not homoerotic sword fight in a Wendy's parking lot, preferably while we are both being impaled on each other's swords. The sweet pain of almost dying is a very intense moment to share isn't it?

Sweet love

Hair

If it's someone cute, a kiss. Otherwise I'd probably just swallow a hair with some water.

i'd just like. spit in their water bottle. if thats not enough dna i guess licking a paper cut it is. hair is bad idwa bc it doesn't digest and can get wrapped up in things. and like. im too aroace for kissing and such

Last option, cause first is sexy as hell

okay you know what vore is, right. and you know how blood and organ transfusions work? well...

Not at all, like?? I enjoy being alive and not having my body destroyed thank you. Literally everyone with OfA died young-ish or has suffered debilitating injuries bc of it. Like Midoriya's bones are powder, and we don't even need to go into All Might's medical history. Like thanks but no thanks no freaky dna ingestion 4 me

Had a open cut from a can lid and ofa holder had an open cut. While lamenting about fins a successor.

Blood

Assuming we can bypass the rules of canon, it would be funny as fuck is OFA was passed on by intentional physical contact. So yes, a smooch for First and Second (and Second and Third) but also. Bitchslap of destiny. Nana giving her protege one last hug. All Might ruffles Mido’s hair like a dad to pass it on. I’m sure you get it

Bleeding over an open wound

lil bit of spit in a milkshake.

I hold their hand Platonically but it's summer and we're both sweaty and they're a little loopy and having weird thoughts due to dehydration and heat lmao, literally hanging around anyone for any extended period of time guarantees you accidentally ingest SOME of their dna. Dead skin cells are floating through the air ~constantly~ and if you have a friend I promise you've inhaled their dead skin cells before. Have fun with that knowledge!!

ok so like deffo a kiss, but in canon people get weird biological urges for using their quirks, like bby Toga drinking bird blood. First has had a LOT of "spit in their drink" intrusive thoughts over the years. immediately post first-kiss he is mystified that his intrusive thoughts have disappeared entirely, but then BAM it seems that second has the stockpile now, and with it, a preoccupation with vampire lore

drink from the same water bottle?

“EAT THIS!”

Pass it on by making them lick my arm because that would make them rly uncomfortable, passed to me by spiting in my 20oz Red Bull and then chugging it

#aaaand done #this was going to be like. nicely organized in a couple different ways and i still might #but out of slots for that today so

[bobasheebaby]

100 New Girl Prompts

So many prompts, most of which are funny. Break at 15 cause it’s mega long.

1 "I'm using my bride/groom card!" — Cece

2 “Can we just take a minute to celebrate me?" — Schmidt

3 “So many emotions." — Nick

4 “I'm totaling my assets. It's really bleak." — Jess

5 “Look at those horny horny hippos.” — Nick

6 “I got mozzarella sticks for fingers." — Nick

7 “Every moment you're on this Earth is a moment I know where you are." — Nick

8 “It is my Secret Santa alias." — Winston

9 “Friend face." — Winston

10 “It's perfectly fine to watch TV all day." — Nick

11 “If I were off my rocker, would I take a weekly selfie with my cat?" — Winston

12 “I can't find my driving moccasins anywhere." — Schmidt

13 “Believe it or not, that's not the first time someone's broken my feeling stick. I have a travel size." — Jess

14 “Put on some pants, or at least some really high socks." — Jess

15 “You like me? You like my personality?" “I was surprised, too.” — Schmidt & Cece

16 "I just wanted to listen to Taylor Swift alone!" — Jess

17 “That's like the president and the vice president not being best friends." — Winston

18 “I'll take the strongest drink you have, and also a wine spritzer on the side in case I don't like it." — Jess

19 “You have the right...to remain hugged." — Coach

20 “If you are for one second suggesting that I don't know how to open a musical, how dare you!" — Schmidt

21 “I was sabotaged by my baby box." — Jess

22 “We are literally the most embarrassing people on the planet." — Jess

23 "It's a weird life, but it's where I'm at right now." — Nick

24 "You gave me a cookie, I gave you a cookie." — Nick

25 “Go put a dollar in the jar right now." — Coach

26 “This is my jam." — Coach

27 “Saturday is a day for sleeping, and damn it, you will not take that away from me!" — Winston

28 “Are we eating or are we not eating?" — Winston

29 "Eating cookies and avoiding confrontation." — Jess

30 “Because it's a great story, and I'm a teller of stories." — Nick

31 “I like being weird." — Jess

32 "This is the worst thing to ever happen to me. I've lived a very fortunate life!" — Jess

33 "I don't like it. It's too much responsibility." — Nick

34 “Are you cooking a frittata in a sauce pan? What is this – prison?” — Schmidt

35 “I hate your mustache because I miss your upper lip.” — Schmidt

36 “He’s/She's got that giant heart that's part compass and part flashlight and he’s/she's just the greatest person I have ever met.” — Nick

37 “Who's that guy/girl? It's NAME." — Jess

38 “Watch your front because we've got your back!” — Cece

39 “Picking lint off of a man's/woman’s sleeve is the most intimate gesture.” — Cece

40 “Blast from the past, how's that ass?” — Jess

41 “I hate this. I just wanna sit around and do nothing, but that is not hot.” “That's hot to me. You add some sweatpants to that and that is better than porn.” — Kai & Nick

42 “Look at that font! What is this? Amateur hour? At least use Palatino.” — Nick

43 “I’m like a sexual snowflake. Each night with me is like a unique experience.” — Schmidt

44 “Where have you been? I am having a major life crisis, and you guys are, what, just driving around, French kissing each other like a couple of Dutch hookers?” — Schmidt

45 “No sig oths.” “Just say ‘significant others.” “Maybe you have that kind of time, but I’m on a tight sched.” — Schmidt & Cece

46 “I know this isn’t gonna end well, but the whole middle part is going to be awesome.” — Nick

47 “NAME, you’ve been staring at this guy/girl for 5 minutes. Please tell me you’re checking him/her out, otherwise you’re a serial killer. Which would explain a lot.” — Schmidt

48 “This is a horrible neighborhood. There are youths everywhere!” — Schmidt

49 “Guess whose personalized condoms just arrived!” — Schmidt

50 “I’m really gonna need you to step it up tonight, okay? When I see you, I wanna be thinking, ‘Who let the dirty slut out of the slut house?’” — Schmidt

51 “Can someone please get my towel? It’s in my room next to my Irish walking cape!” — Schmidt

52 “Have you seen my sharkskin laptop sleeve?” — Schmidt

53 “Don’t pretend to know my pain.” — Schmidt

54 “Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.” — Nick

55 “I don't know what I'm doing emotionally or -- let's be honest -- sexually.” — Jess

56 “What if I have some idea of love in my head and it’s just totally wrong?” — Jess

57 “Life sucks. And then it gets better. And then it sucks again.” — Nick

58 “I like getting older, I feel like I’m aging into my personality.” — Nick

59 “You know, sometimes I feel like I’ve never really felt love.” — Winston

60 “When you care about somebody you do what's best for them even if it sucks for you.” — Schmidt

61 “Old people freak me out. With their hands and their legs. They’re like the people version of pleated pants.” — Schmidt

62 “I’m gonna have to run all the way home, and I have my slipperiest loafers on.” — Schmidt

63 “Downstairs neighbour put a password on their wi-fi.” — Nick

64 “You were denied a cell phone because you have the credit score of a homeless ghost.” — Schmidt

65 “I’m only attracted to guys/girls who are afraid of success and think someone famous stole their idea.” — Jess

66 “This place is fancy and I don’t know which fork to kill myself with.” — Nick

67 “Without sex, he’s/she’s not your boyfriend/girlfriend. Okay? He’s/She’s a friend you buy meals for.” — Schmidt

68 “I feel like I wanna murder someone. And also, I want soft pretzels.” — Jess

69 “So when I do the chicken dance, I do it a little differently. Instead of doing claps, I like to do a peck. It’s more realistic.” — Jess

70 “NAME doesn’t have a life plan. He/She doesn’t have a day plan. I once found a note that he/she wrote to himself that said, ‘Put on pants.'” — Jess

71 “I don’t want to kiss and tell, but I ruined my dresser during intercourse. Will you go to Ikea with me?” — Jess

72 “Can I get an alcohol?” — Nick

73 “I want to kill you, because I respect you. NAME! I think I understand hunting!” — Nick

74 “Look, we’re not trying to be mean. We just don’t want you to be yourself… in any way.”

75 “I have decided to give up on men/women and put all of that energy into tomatoes.”

76 “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? No, a summer’s day is not a bitch!” — Nick

77 “I only wanna make a drink a coal miner would want. Straight forward. Honest. Something that says, ‘I work in a hole.'” — Nick

78 “I’m not convinced I know how to read, I’ve just memorized a lot of words.” — Nick

79 “I like chipmunks more than squirrels.” — Nick

80 “I can’t believe I’m the sober one. That’s actually never happened before in my life.” — Nick

81 “Beans are nothing but soggy nuts.” — Schmidt

82 “Can I interest you in some white noise?” — Winston

83 “Those are pickles in progress.” — Winston

84 “Who’s talking to you, Depression-era garbage man?” — Coach

85 “I need everyone to shut up.” — Coach

86 “Your asses belong to me now.” — Coach

87 “That’s what’s up, that’s what’s up. No doubt. Diggity.” — Coach

88 “I hate when Schmidt cries. He sounds like a ghost singing ‘Hey Ya.'” — Coach

89 “I’ve made out with half of the guys/girls in this room.” — Cece

90 “You always see the worst in people.” “Yeah, because people are the worst.” — Jess & Nick

91 “I’m sorry we’re not going this weekend.” “But It’s free.” “Did you say free?” “Yeah.” “We’re 100% in. I’ll go pack now.” — Nick & Jes

92 “I’m going to end up alone. I’m going to be a single old man/lady flashing people on the subway.” — Jess

93 “I’ve got two perfectly good forks on the end of my arms.” — Nick

94 “If we needed to talk about feelings they would be called talkings.” — Nick

95 “When you question my pajamas, you make me question our entire friendship!” — Jess

96 “Why can’t I have the things that I want?!” — Schmidt

97 “Bathtubs are medieval filth cauldrons.” — Schmidt

98 “They don’t hate me because I’m old. They hate me because of my personality.” — Schmidt

99 “It’s like you’re ripping the side block out of my mental Jenga.” — Schmidt

100 “I’m not actually quite sure how to stop this.” — Schmidt

#new girl prompts #new girl quotes #writing prompts #dialogue prompts #drabble prompts #jessica day #nick miller #cece parekh #winston bishop #winston schmidt #coach #long post #read more

[amethystlogan]

It’s More Than Just a Squishmallow

Alternatively - Patton’s Excuse to Buy All of the Squishmallows

Summary - Patton is adorable and gifts his famILY squishmallows. Fluff and comfort ensues.

Warnings - minor anxiety from Virgil towards the end

No romantic ships, a bunch of platonic fluff

Human AU

Patton loves many things. His roommates-turned friends-turned family top the list, but are quickly followed by a variety of small enjoyments, such as cookies, movie nights, onesie pajamas, all manner of fluffy animals, and many, many fandoms. But also on the list is a thing that Patton loves, but can quickly become problematic - plush toys and stuffed animals. The problem occurs because when Patton loves something, he can easily go a little... overboard, to say the least. Usually it’s easy enough for the others to reign him back in, especially when it comes to his collecting such things. After all. the six of them sharing an apartment leaves limited space for him to accumulate too many things. The general rule established was as long as Patton could keep his collections confined to his space, it was fine.

However, all reasoning went out the window when Patton discovered squishmallows. The others knew things could quickly get out of hand the moment he came home from a run to the store with the soft, squishy, cat-shaped blob clutched in his arms, his face practically glowing with happiness and excitement. Not even Logan, who would normally be strict about sticking to shopping lists and not splurging on such unnecessary purchases outside of special occasions, had the heart to chastise him.

The cat squishmallow found its home on Patton’s bed, and the others hoped that would be the end of it. But then Patton came home with another. And another. Almost every time he was sent on a shopping trip by himself, he came back with an embarrassed blush and proclamations of, “But look how cute he is!” and “It’s just one more, Logan. What’s the harm?” 

But now, Patton faced a dilemma as he stood in front of his bed, dinosaur squishmallow in his arms, with no place left to set it down. With his new squishmallows, combined with the other stuffed animals he’d already had, there was barely enough room for him to sleep, let alone continue his new collection. He pouted, looking down and the dinosaur. He needed to figure out something! If there wasn’t room in his space, he needed to justify using the shared space in the apartment. And he knew he could probably puppy-dog face his way into keeping this one, but it would likely be the last.

Patton sighed, sitting carefully on the edge of his bed, dinosaur balanced carefully on his lap. As he sat, smiling softly at this small, cuddly friend, he began to think of his real friends. Of their smiles, their hugs, their moments of happiness and almost child-like behavior that they seemed to save for Patton’s famILY movie nights or pajamas only Saturdays.

From across the room, lying on his bed with his sketchbook in his lap, doodling with Disney songs playing in his earbuds, Roman glanced up and could practically see the light bulb go off in Patton’s head. Roman paused his music and pulled out an earbud. “You good, Padre? For a moment you looked like Logan when he finally solved that twelve sided Rubix cube.”

Patton looked up, his eyes shining with excitement. “I’m good, Ro! Hey, can I ask your opinion real quick?” he asked, bouncing off his bed over to Roman’s side of their room, dinosaur in hand. “Absolutely!” he replied, setting his sketchbook aside, “Always happy to contribute in a moment of inspiration.” “Do you think Janus would like this?” Patton asked, holding up the dinosaur. “Run out of room to keep them yourself?” asked Roman, watching as a penguin squishmallow slowly slid off of Patton’s bed and onto the floor. Patton followed his gaze and shrugged impishly. “....Maybe?” He gave a small smile, and Roman couldn’t help but smile back. He turned back to the dinosaur Patton held. “Hm, I think Janus would love him. He likes all sorts of reptiles, and due to the general blobbish shape of these, he kind of resembles those snakes he is so fond of. This dino could be the perfect companion! Especially for those all-nighters he spends with his nose in his law textbooks.” Patton giggled, “yeah, maybe he’s pillow-y enough to convince him to actually go to bed, before Logan goes after him with his laminated sleep schedule again.” “Excellent idea. I think he’d really appreciate it, Patt.” “Thanks, kiddo! I’ll give it to him when he gets home.”

Janus had accepted the dinosaur with dignified gratitude, trying to express that he liked it without seeming overly excited, as he attempted to maintain his smooth indifference without hurting Patton’s feelings. But anyone could see that the dinosaur had immediately taken residence, metaphorically in Janus’ heart as a prized possession, and literally at his desk as his new study buddy. It was to no one’s surprise when Janus threatened to physically fite Remus after he almost spilled ink on the plush after bumping into Janus’ desk when leaving their room with his arms full of various messy art supplies. Janus could pretend sentimental affection for the toy due to it being a gift from Patton, but it was obvious he was soft for the dinosaur.

Thanks to the ink incident, it was clear to Patton which squishmallow to get Remus next time he was out. He practically squealed when patton handed him the purple, squishy octopus. “He won’t mind if you get ink on him, ‘cause he could use it for camouflage!” Patton explained, as Remus immediately hugged the toy to his chest, regardless of the ink and paint all over his shirt. “I love him!” Remus shrieked, pulling Patton into an equally crushing hug, before running off to his room, proclaiming, “Me and Inky are gonna plunge the depths of the ocean for inspiration! Anglerfish ink prints dead ahead!”

Logan shook his head fondly, failing to hide his smile at the interaction. “I suppose I should refrain from informing Remus that and octopus of such bright coloration would likely not be capable of accompanying him to such depths due to lack of sunlight?” “Oh, let him have his fun.” Patton said, flopping onto the couch next to Logan. “They’re adorable squishy blobs of animals, it doesn’t have to be realistic.” “I suppose there is some truth to such a sentiment, although I’m sure we are both aware he will begin to speak to it as though it is conscious.” “I know, but that’s part of the fun, too.” Logan gave a small smile to indicate understanding, if lack of agreement, before returning to his book.

And so,to cater to Logan’s clearly more scientific and practical preferences, patton got him a unicorn, but in key chain size. He figured Logan would be able to look past any scientific inaccuracies with an animal that wasn’t even real. And they were all aware of Logan’s fondness for the fantastical, as evidenced by his own onesie. Logan had given Patton a look over the top of his glasses rim when presented with it, but he wasn’t fooling anyone. He had long ago given up the pretense of being all seriousness all of the time, and found to his surprise that the others respected him no less for it. However, he did choose to only indulge in such frivolity on occasion, such as his onesie only making an appearance at their monthly movie marathons. He did appreciate the mythology and folklore behind such creatures, but was grateful for the smaller, more inconspicuous size of the plush Patton had selected. He chose to attach it to the strap of his shoulder bag for library trips, but carefully tucked the unicorn into the bag. He would never deny sentimentality, but would prefer not to have it on display all of the time. And if Patton caught sight of him gently squeezing the small squishmallow with a fond expression after a particularly stressful day, he chose to make no mention of it.

Roman had honestly been a little trickier than Patton had expected. He’d been standing in that toy aisle for way to long, but it was a difficult choice. At a glance, his eye was caught by a lion squishmallow, which had seemed perfect for their own Gryffindor prince. But sitting behind the lion was a soft, light grey and white owl that drew Patton to reconsider, for reasons he couldn’t quite explain or describe just yet. But the longer he stood there looking at it, the more convinced he was that the little owl was just meant for Roman, even if he couldn’t say why.

It became clear when he got home, and found Roman in their room, almost in tears. He was fighting a major bout of artist’s block, and couldn’t seem to put pen to paper. No idea seemed good enough, bold enough. The white expanse of empty paper intimidated him, and he couldn’t find the courage or impulse that usually drove him through such moments. Even if he could make something, the mere thought of posting it anywhere, it scared him. 

But then Patton came in, pulled the sketchbook from his lap, and handed him that little owl squishmallow before pulling him into a hug. As Roman accepted the embrace, and began to calm down, he looked at that owl, soft and comforting, and he found that moment of reprieve that the others could only associate with Patton. Roman knew that he could always come back to his work later, with a fresh mind and new motivation. For now, he had Patton, and when Patton couldn’t be there, he had that little owl.

When Harry Potter faced hardships, he didn’t need the Gryffindor lion to bolster his courage, but a moment with his friends, or with the loyal owl that was there for him until the end. Hedwig the Second, as Patton affectionately called her, became Roman’s go-to for artist’s block, stress, sickness, or anything where he just needed that moment to regroup.

Virgil knew it was coming, he just didn’t know when. What had started as a simple excuse to buy more squishmallows had grown into a mission of sorts, and Virgil knew it was only a matter of days before he was gifted a squishmallow of his own. He didn’t entirely know what to expect, but hoped it would be a bat, or black cat, or something of the sort that would at least fit his aesthetic. His half of the room he shared with Logan was an emo’s dream after all. He figured Patton knew him well enough to suit the plush to the black and purple scheme he had going. But after Logan’s unicorn, he really couldn’t guess what Patton would do.

The very last thing he expected was the pastel blue dragon squishmallow that might have been as big as Patton himself that Virgil found sitting on his bed when he got home from class. But he couldn’t find it in him to care about his “rep” for the moment, as he was about two steps from an anxiety attack. He’d woken up that morning on edge, it was just going to be one of those days. Class had been awful, he hadn’t understood the lecture, and his fellow students had decided to be louder than usual leaving the lecture hall, only making him more uneasy and overwhelmed. Then he’d nearly gotten run over in the crosswalk coming into the apartment building. It didn’t help that it was one of those rare afternoons when everyone else was out, either in class, at work, or at rehearsal for Roman.

So Virgil stood in the doorway of his room, in an empty apartment, shaking, trying to fight back tears, and found himself facing the light, fuzzy blob of comfort that he knew had come from Patton. Virgil choked out a laugh, wiping at his eyes as he toed off his shoes and climbed into his bed, cuddling the dragon close. He breathed deeply, and slowly. In, and out. He could almost hear what Patton would be saying. He was okay. Logan could help him sort out his class notes. The car hadn’t really been that close outside, the sudden honking was just jarring. He was okay. In, and out. He was home, he was safe, it was quiet. The others would be home soon. He fell asleep shortly after calming down, with thoughts of his friends in his mind and the soft, soothing crinkles of the dragons wings and scales under his fingers.

It may have looked quite out of place in his room, but to Virgil, it didn’t matter. That dragon was his new protection from overrunning thoughts when the others couldn’t be there. And when Patton got home that night, he found himself tackled in hugs, and the dragon found a permanent spot right on Virgil’s bed.

Suffice to say, the others never again thought it a problem that Patton like to collect a few too many of the things he loved, because his famILY was still at the top of his list.

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #patton sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #squishmallows #patton is an adorable bean

[blarrghe]

I got tagged by @oediebees​, thanks, these are fun! and I’ll tag umm @lavellanhunter​ @serphena​ @midnightprelude​ if y’all feel like it

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?

curly hair don’t care (I don’t brush my hair I comb it in the shower sometimes...the comb is blue) 

2. A food you never eat?

Meat, dairy.... a bunch of things that hurt my tummy (except I eat them anyway oops)

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?

I run pretty cold. Poor circulation lyfeeee

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Hangin with the bae learning about ancient history because we are nerds. 

5. What is your favorite candy bar?

like chocolate bar? I can’t eat chocolate and it makes me sad. I bought a vegan white chocolate bar at the health food store a while ago for like 5$ it was good but like. it was also five whole dollars. 

6. Have you ever been to a professional sporting event?

NHL game once. There was a fight on the ice and then in the stands XD

7. What was the last thing you said out loud?

“Love you, bee” yes we are very cute thank

8. What is your favorite ice cream?

Stop asking me about things I’m not allowed to eat waah. I bought vegan icecream and it made me sick also lol so literally just. let’s go with rainbow sherbert. (it used to be cookie dough ice cream stop doing this to me)

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?

Water

10. Do you like your wallet?

My best friend and I bought matching star wars wallets a couple years ago and we both still use them so yeah. it’s got the millennium falcon on it and it came with a keychain that I eventually gave to a kid at work.

11. What was the last thing you ate?

Leftover veggie stir fry with black beans! I made it yesterday and it was pretty good if I say so myself. 

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

I haven’t bought any new clothes since like, October? 

13. The last sporting event you watched?

uhhhhhhhhh does walking by a soccer game in the park count

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

I make it with salt and nutritional yeast! and sometimes garlic too. Highly recommend. 

15. Who was the last person you sent a text message to?

Actual text? Coworker. 

16. Ever go camping?

As much as I can! Went every summer as a kid, and last summer went on a month long cross-country camping roadtrip. Probably won’t get to go again for a while though. 

17. Do you take vitamins?

I buy them and then forget does that count

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?

I can count on one hand the number of times I have gone to a church service. And if you discount funerals then I’m pretty sure it’s...2? (and if you wanna do the thing and make it synagogue then still only for the holidays and not in years and years) 

19. Do you have a tan?

Pretty sure I am actually incapable of having a tan. 

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?

I probably shouldn’t be eating either. Homemade pizza with flatbread and vegan cheese is pretty good tho. 

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?

Not usually 

22. What color socks do you usually wear?

I just have a large collection of various cute patterened socks with like, cats and stuff on em. Current faves are the ones that make my feets look like sharks =]

23. Ever drive above the speed limit?

speed of traffic but also, I don’t have a car so. 

24. What terrifies you?

ummm the feeling you get when you’re stuck under water and think your gonna drown isn’t very fun. 

25. Look to your left what do you see?

pillows, cart thing with books on it, closet. 

26. What chore do you hate?

changing the cat litter kinda sucks 

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?

Uh. Australia, I guess? 

28. What is your favorite soda?

I’m a big fan of buying random overpriced weird flavoured drinks so probably like, the blue jones soda or something. But realistically, cream soda and gingerale. 

29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

I don’t have a car so. I also don’t get fast food much tho. 

30. Who was the last person you talked to?

The boy!

31. Favorite cut of beef?

Literally no idea haven’t eaten it in over ten years 

32. Last song you listened to?

Currently listening to “If The World Was Ending” by Gracie and Rachel, I don’t even know if I like it yet it just came on my spotify release radar thing. 

...

yeah it’s aight. 

33. Last book you read?

Last book I finished was the Silmarillion. Currently working my way through Jewel’s autobiography, some book on mindfulness, and Unfinished Tales. 

34. Favorite day of the week?

Honestly I’m a big fan of Sundays. They’re my bread day.

35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?

Probably. Let’s not find out. 

36. How do you like your coffee?

Cappuccinos are my fave but usually just strong with oatmilk and a little sugar. 

37. Favorite pair of shoes?

The knee-high boots I have that lace up the back, especially since I got undue flak for em once and the spite makes it better. 

38. At what time do you usually go to bed?

Time is meaningless.

39. At what time do you normally get up?

See above. 

40. What do you prefer - sunrises or sunsets?

Both are nice!

41. How many blankets are on your bed?

Currently just two small soft throw blankets because it’s been hot af. One is a spiderweb one I bought in the halloween section and the other is star wars lmao. 

42. Describe your kitchen plates?

Like, four matching ones that we never use, two matching ones of a different pattern, one random blue one, and a bunch of takeout container things I reuse. 

43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?

Nah depends on the mood. Wine is good, ciders are good, some beers are good, and I used to bartend so making fancy cocktails is also sometimes good. 

44. Do you play cards?

Only when camping and it rains. 

45. Can you change a tire?

On my bike sure. Someone taught me how to change a car tire once but I wouldn’t test it. 

46. What is your favorite province?

Probably British Columbia.

47. Favorite job you ever had?

The one I have now! Teaching/counselling at an elementary/jr. high school :) 

48. How did you get your biggest scar?

Don’t really have any big scars. I do have a small one on my face from a kid at my old job. 

49. What did you do today that made someone happy?

Had some quality hangs earlier, watched a movie, cuddled, etc. 

#there were only 49 I feel cheated #tag meme thing #about me #blarghe

[neon-vocalist]

day 17: gingerbread house: macaronnie

Originally written October 13, 2021

Perhaps buying a gingerbread house marketed as "giant" wasn't the best idea. Correction: it was definitely not the best idea.

The final product sits pretty at a foot wide by a foot deep by one foot two inches tall. In other words- very large. And Veronica and Heather have decorated the entire thing. It took three piping bags of white frosting, one of each of red and green, an entire box of Mike & Ike's, way too many gumdrops, 20-ish peppermints, and an ungodly amount of those tasteless rainbow sprinkle ball things.

But let's pause for a second and go back to the actual making of the house. See, this house wasn't one you just set up and glued together with icing, oh no. This one required baking. The dreaded b word which required use of the oven, something that never went that well in the Sawyer/McNamara household. As in, smoke billowing through the tiny kitchen, having to call the fire department multiple times, and throwing away many a cookie tray. It doesn't go over well with Violet, either. She always tries to eat either the burnt product or the fire itself, and is very disappointed when neither of them prove tasty.

It didn't even come with dough. It came with the cookie cutters and decor and that was it. So Veronica and Heather were left to fend for themselves and make a solid gingerbread cookie that could withstand its inevitable dropping to the floor by Veronica trying to carry it and pet Violet at the same time. It's happened before.

Two failed attempts later, they finally have a decent-looking house built. Veronica was smart enough to bake a fifth wall and second roof in case they break, and if they don't use them, they can just eat them. Or Violet will eat them. That's probably the more realistic outcome.

Let's take a quick detour to talk about the dog.

Violet is Veronica's chocolate Lab. Because of Veronica's fear of dogs and cats, she never thought she'd have a therapy animal, but her cousin Lydia's wife Skye trains these dogs for a living. One of the puppies, then named Milly, failed her classes because she was way too friendly with strangers. Therapy dogs usually have to be very chill, focused on their job, so this one would go to anyone just wanting a puppy. But Skye thought she showed excellent ability to do everything she was needed to do- calm people down and all that jazz- so she didn't give up on the little pup. She took Milly in temporarily and finished her training after work. She didn't get the dog's hyperactivity completely down, but she'd improved so much since the three months that she was rejected from the program.

"Hey, Lyds?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"Don't you have that cousin Veronica?"

"Yes, I have that cousin Veronica." Lydia glanced at Skye, struggling to restrain the dog. "What are you planning?"

"Doesn't she have, like, anxiety or whatever?" Seeing Lydia nod, Skye forged ahead. "Do you think she wants a therapy dog?"

At first, Veronica did not want a therapy dog. At all. But Heather and Lydia convinced her to at least come meet her. And it's been love ever since the dog came up to her and laid its head in her lap.

"Heather!" Veronica shouts. "Do not feed Vio the icing!"

"Who, me?" calls Heather, sticking her frosting-covered finger in her mouth instead of letting the dog lick it. "Sorry, Ultra," she whispers to the dog, scratching her head. "Ronnie's mean."

"Yes, so mean, not letting the dog get sick," Veronica teases, emerging from the basement, kissing Heather on the head and kneeling down to pull Violet into a hug. "Do you think the cookies are cool enough to put together?"

Heather stands up and pokes at one of the cookies. "I mean, maybe, but this icing is really goopy, I wouldn't trust it."

"Never trust the gingerbread kit icing, babe. It's not gonna go well."

"It tastes good though," Heather points out.

"Mackie, that crap is used as cookie glue by kids around the world, what do you think it's doing inside your body?"

"Being delicious."

Veronica sighs with a little smile and comes over to check the temperature of the cookies and the icing's goopiness. "It should work. Test a little here." Heather eagerly pipes where she's pointing. "Not on my finger, Sunny."

"Too late," says Heather with an I'm-totally-innocent grin. Veronica sighs. "Want me to lick it off for you?" she asks with a sweeter yet smile. Veronica just rolls her eyes with a little giggle and lets Mac gently bite her finger and drag off the icing.

"That was just about the spiciest thing we've ever done," points out Heather.

"Would you like to change that?" asks Veronica, raising her eyebrows.

Heather blushes. "Um! Let's decorate... the house..."

"Thought so, my little flustered pan-demi. Let's decorate."

And that unfortunate sequence of events brings us to now, after the house has been decorated in gobs of frosting and lines upon lines of rainbow candy- and then eaten. No trace of it is left. Since Heather and Veronica had to bake it themselves instead of using the cardboard-adjacent cookies that come in your typical gingerbread kit, it tasted really good. Dangerously good, as is evident by the two very different moods displayed by the pair.

Veronica and Violet are in bed together, Violet lying across Veronica's feet, Veronica tucked under the covers and curled in a ball of pain and suffering. And Heather is... hyper is an understatement to describe her condition.

"LOOKLOOKLOOK BONBON. RONNIE. VERI. LOOK. I CAN FIT BEHIND THE TOILET."

"That's nice, baby," Veronica mumbles.

"UH OH."

"What's wrong?" Veronica groans, very limited emotion in her voice.

"I APPEAR TO BE STUCK BEHIND THE TOILET."

"Oh dear mother of churros. Are you kidding me?"

Silence comes from the bathroom. Then, "NOPE!"

"Oh my Lord." Veronica makes a very annoyed noise and rolls over, pulling a pillow over her head. "Good for you, babe."

"LOVE YOU!"

"Love you too..." she mutters into the pillow. "Enjoy."

"I WILL!" Veronica can hear the smile in Heather's voice. "YOU TOO!"

Veronica sighs and burrows deeper under the covers. "Vio, go help Mackie." The dog perks up at the mention of her name, but doesn't quite know what to do. Her human is in distress? But she heard the word go. That usually means to move away from the human that smells of foggy days and sharp white flowers. And Mackie usually refers to the other human, the one that her human loves, the one that smells of sunbeams and chocolate. Hesitant, she hops off the bed and moves toward the scent of the sunny human, glancing back at where her smoky human rests to make sure she's doing the right thing.

The human does not look at her, but makes a satisfied little sound, and that's enough for the dog to keep going. But what is the sunny human doing?

"Hey there, Ultra," says Heather, a little more quietly. "Has Blue sent you to help me out?" Violet trots toward her and starts nudging her with her nose. Heather laughs. "Good girl." She untucks her legs and gracefully exits the hole between the toilet and the wall, smacking her head in the process. "I wasn't really stuck, I was just trying to get Blue to come help me. Which she didn't!" She raises her voice a bit in an attempt to get Veronica to listen to her.

It doesn't work. Veronica's half-asleep and half-delirious in pain. Heather puts a finger to her lips as she climbs into bed, patting the foot of it for the dog to hop up with her, and like that they fall asleep- sunny human, smoky human, and loyal dog.

#macaronnie #veronica sawyer #heather mcnamara #heathers #heathers the musical #fanfic #fanfiction #system scribbles #seven.content #christmas #xmas #day 17 #woohoo #almost done #sort of

[blueskittlesart]

My hot take on vld season 6

Because I’ve seen a lot of discourse about this season so I figured I’d do my opinions in an episode-by-episode breakdown. It’s pretty log sooo:

Episode 1: Omega Shield

Okay. So upon first seeing this episode I was MAD. (Mostly because of how close Lotor and Allura seemed to be) But I get now why that had to be done and I actually like the direction they chose to go with Lotor, but I’ll get to that later.

I’m a bit annoyed that this seems to be the “Hunk development” we were told we were getting. (Heads up, vld, one episode does NOT count as full development.) However, it was really refreshing to see him be the focus of an episode, and we really got to see the growth that’s been going on for him in the background these past few seasons. Like, at the beginning of the show he was this timid little teenager who couldn’t fly without getting motion sick, constantly tried to take the easy way out, and generally avoided confrontation at all costs, not because he was cowardly, but because he was, understandably, really fucking scared of space. (And I don’t blame him. Space is huge and terrifying.) But now, we get to see him being a commanding force. We see him take charge of a situation and whip others into shape, using his capacity to learn new material (arguably his most important trait) as a weapon to get his job done. It was amazing to see that side of Hunk, even if it was just for one episode.

And then of course we have Lance just fucking dying. As much as my allurance heart wants to appreciate that scene, I can’t entirely ignore the fact that Voltron continued its pattern of having a life-changing, traumatic event happen to a character (other examples include Lance almost getting sucked out into space through the airlock in season 2(?) and Keith being ready to sacrifice himself for the greater good in season 4(?)) and then never address it or the trauma it may have caused again. Lance died. He fucking DIED, and two scenes later we see him smiling in the background as if nothing happened. Maybe they’ll use it for some angst in the future, but it honestly just feels like bad, neglectful writing to me at this point. They want dramatic scenes without having to address the way those scenes will impact the characters and the story. 

Episode 2: Razor’s Edge

Finally, the Keith and Krolia development we’ve been waiting for!! There’s very little for me to complain about in this episode. I loved the subtle details, like the way Keith’s dad wore the jacket that was later given to Shiro. I think Keith’s parents’ backstory was done really well, and I’m really happy that he gets to reunite with his mom again.

Honestly the second they saw that giant space fish thing I thought “lion turtle.” A huge animal with a forest on its back where the characters get trapped for a while?? Come on. I’m glad Keith and Krolia got that time to bond, even though it hasn’t really been addressed yet. Also I’m in love with Keith's dog (I had him pegged as a cat person but hey, at least I know Shiro is still on my side.)

Plus we finally!! got!! the “boy from Cuba” line!!! and yeah, it was in reference to Allura, but it suggests a lot more Lance in the seasons to come, especially since they’re going back to Earth soon. That line, at least to me, seems to really put a lot of emphasis on how connected Lance is to his Earthen heritage, and I really, really hope that will be explored more in the coming seasons. 

Also side note, but that Lance scene where he knocks over the metal thing (tool of some sort?) and just kind of stares at it as it clatters to the ground was so fucking funny?? That was one of the top comedic moments of this season, not gonna lie.

Overall I was really happy with this episode. It was plot-driven and interesting, and everything seemed to fit really well.

Episode 3: Monsters & Mana

I have never once played D&D in my life, and I’m just gonna state that now so no one comes after me for this section

I’ve seen some complaints that this was a filler episode, and yeah, maybe you’re right. But it was a GOOD filler episode. It was engaging, realistic given the timeline and story, and provided a lot of subtle foreshadowing in an interesting way. 

It makes sense that everyone on the team would need a fucking break after all this excitement. At that time in the story, they were relatively inactive, since they were working with Lotor and all that. They couldn’t have been working on the castle at every waking moment, and playing a game like M&M is a great way to pass their time. 

I’m gonna get into some elements of the characters that I found interesting here too. Namely, Shiro and Hunk’s backstories. Shiro’s “master” in his little cutscene had one messed up eye, dare i say Iverson? yeah, we don’t know much about Shiro’s life on Earth before Voltron. But the parallels from what we DO know suggest to me that there’s correlation between the M&M character backstories and the main-story character backstories. Which bring me to Hunk. His character Block’s backstory was that his “village was turned to stone by an evil sorcerer.” I don’t know what this means, but I have a few speculations:

1. Hunk’s hometown was ravaged by some sort of natural disaster while he was in space (we know he’s a Pacific Islander, right? So I don’t think this is too far off base)

2. If the Earth has already been invaded by hostile aliens (Sendak’s “I know your weakness: you value the lives of others”) Hunk’s family or home were directly impacted (this one seems to be the most logical to me, since Block’s quest is to “save” his village, which Hunk could easily do by defeating the Galra/other hostile aliens on Earth)

3. Some other form of disaster has and/or will affect Hunk’s family/home and he’ll have to either save them or deal with the after-effects of it 

Either way it’ll be interesting to see how next season plays out back on earth!

As for some of the other foreshadowing, I take you all now to the way Shiro keeps fucking dying. Shiro’s “twin brother” was played off like a joke in this episode, but thinking about it, I see it as a subtle reference to the whole clone Shiro ordeal. the original Shiro, now dead, was the clone Keith killed, and “Gyro” (his “twin brother”) is the Shiro who was revived at the end of this season. And judging by the big role he played in defeating the boss at the end of the episode, the newly-revived Shiro will be extremely important in upcoming seasons.

Episode 4: The Colony

“But even if they do reach the quintessence field, then what? The last time anyone got in there, it turned Zarkon evil.” THIS IS WHY YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO LANCE.

I honestly really, really love the direction they decided to go with Lotor. they totally brought him back around into the interesting, dynamic villain I knew he could be and I’m so happy about that.

On to what specifically I noticed about the plot of this episode. One big thing for me is the revelation that quintessence can, in fact, be extracted from other beings. This only brings up more questions, though: What did Lotor want the quintessence for? The Galra Empire already seems to have plenty of fuel. How was he harvesting the Alteans’ quintessence? Did he have druids helping him, or did he discover another way to do it? Did anyone else in the Galra Empire know about this? The whole operation raises more questions than it answers.

And when Allura found out and just fucking YEETED Lotor across the room? I may have watched it at 3 am but I was still screaming at the top of my goddamn lungs, at least on the inside. She gave him exactly what he deserved with no goddamn hesitation and I love it.

Shiro going full clone was crazy, but we all expected it. I’ll admit that his being used to steal Lotor was not what I would have guessed, though. It kinda turned out to be a pointless use of him in the end though since Lotor escaped immediately

Another thing about Lotor’s plot that stuck out to me: He knew that there were living Alteans. He knew how much Allura wished she could have her planet and her people back, and how much it hurt her that she’d never be able to see them again. And he still kept this place secret from her. He still took her people and exploited them for his plan, and then was stupid enough to think she’d see that he was doing it “for the greater good?” Even if it WASN’T such a despicable fucking thing to do, those are Allura’s people. She’s wanted nothing but to see more Alteans for the past year at least. She’s not ever going to see things his way. 

another side note: i want romelle to snap my neck

Episode 5: The Black Paladins

Holy mcfuck is there a lot in this episode. First off, as an artist and animator I really need to take a moment to appreciate how fucking beautiful everything was in this episode. The shadows, the movement, the colors, the cinematography, everything about this episode was artistically stunning. The animators really outdid themselves with this one. 

Okay, since there’s so much to talk about with this episode, I’m gonna break it up. We’ll start with what happened on the castle.

Pidge... is fucking amazing. That’s all I can even say about this kid. This is a fifteen year old girl, she’s literally a couple months younger than I am, and she’s dealing with all this shit and pulling through. That’s amazing. She has literal adults looking to her for help in a life-or-death situation, she had to be under insane stress during this episode, knowing that what she does could mean the difference between life or death for all of them. And she pulls through. Pidge Holt is so fucking strong and I love her with all of my heart. Someone get this kid a peanut butter cookie.

It’s interesting to me that not only did she instantly recognize the code from Shiro’s arm, but also had a program ready to destroy it. It reminds me of that Voltron comic where she’s able to take down her fellow paladins because she observes them and knows their weaknesses. She watches, She listens, and she prepares for every possible contingency, no matter how badly she wants to believe they’ll never happen. And that’s why she’s dangerous. 

Okay. now for all the mess that happened with Shiro.

Mother of god, I am SHOOK. Even the SETTING of the damn thing was so goddamn thought out and interesting I don’t know where to start.

There were so many other clone Shiros. Why were there so many other clone Shiros??? Were they planning to release more at the same time, or were they backups in case the original clone was compromised? Were they tests? What???? Were???? They??? For???????

And that Galra form Keith. Is that something he discovered in the two years he spent with Krolia? Something he can consciously activate? Or did it just happen to come out because he was in a moment of high emotion and adrenaline? It also seemed to give him a boost of strength, because Shiro was only able to push him off after the form deactivated. I hope we’ll get to see him use it again!

“I should have abandoned you just like your parents did. They saw that you were broken. Worthless. I should have seen it, too.”

Holy fuck clone Shiro is MEAN. I can’t even begin to imagine what it must’ve felt like for Keith to hear that from Shiro, who’s basically the one person he’s been able to rely on dependably for his whole life. In his vlog he even said that his trust issues are BECAUSE Krolia left him, and having his older-brother figure, who he looks up to and trusts like no one else, reaffirm those doubts he already has must have been devastating, even if he learned later it wasn’t really Shiro. I doubt that’s an image he’ll be able to get out of his head quickly.

All those flashbacks of little Keith... he had that mullet his whole life I guess (I mean he probably learned how to cut his hair from Shiro so like. is anyone surprised). But in all seriousness, does the Garrison take middle school aged students too? because he looked way too young to be a high schooler. (Side note: Are they letting the middle schoolers fly the goddamn spaceships?? Who the fuck decided this program was a good idea??)

Keith also told Shiro he should “send [Keith] back to the home already.” By “the home” did he mean the shack his parents lived in? That’s doubtful, since without Shiro he’d be living there alone. I would assume Keith was put in foster care of some kind, most likely an orphanage, which is probably what he meant by “the home.” It’s a minor detail, and just something I noticed, but I figured I’d point it out anyway. 

I really, really loved this episode. It’s probably one of my favorites in the whole series. 

Episode 6: All Good Things

(My klance obsessed ass feels the need to point out that the blue and red stars are still in the astral plane, and were shown in the very first scene of the episode. Just saying.)

So did this episode just confirm that when a paladin dies in their lion, their consciousness stays within the lion? Because damn, that sets the stage for a LOT of angst fic. (Fic writers, get on this.) 

Lance supporting Allura is my goddamn aesthetic honestly. Friends, lovers, siblings, I don’t care, but I’m happy their relationship is getting development!

KEITH GOT A STRONGER CONNECTION WITH THE BLACK LION!! HE CAN USE ITS WINGS!! This gives me so much hope for black paladin Keith again in season 7 because he’s clearly got such a strong connection with Black... he deserves this. also black deserves a paladin thats a real fucking person and not a fake bitch

Coran development?? In my Voltron?? It’s more likely than you think

Then of course, we have Lotor going full Azula. I said this before, but I am so, so, so fucking happy they chose to make him a villain in the end after all. I was so worried after last season that they’d throw away all his potential as a villain in order to go for a shitty redemption plot, and I was completely fooled up until the last second, just like the paladins. And that’s a big part of what I love about it. We were in the paladin’s shoes. We didn’t know what to believe, we either liked Lotor or were suspicious, but most people truly believed the plan was for him to be redeemed. The writers really did a great job of making us feel the way the paladins did, seeing Lotor’s betrayal and eventual descent into madness, and that’s truly the kind of thing that makes me love Voltron. 

anyway lotortron (aka whoretron) is fucking ugly and im glad its stuck in the quintessence feild for all eternity

Episode 7: Defender of all Universes

Beautiful fight scenes, insane dialog, wonderful storyline. All in all, it was a perfect conclusion to the season. 

The fight in the quintessence field? Absolutely beautifully done. Suspense, beautiful cinematography, and it all tied back to the show’s underlying theme of teamwork in the best way. I have no complaints in the slightest about how this was done. Honest to god, I loved this whole fight. (I am curious about what will happen to Lotor, though. will he be literally destroyed in the quintessence field when the power gets to be too much for him, or will he just kind of stay there festering until someone manages to travel in there again? Maybe the paladins will go back and get him later in the series.)

The castle is gone now I guess?? rip (More Coran development?? in my Voltron???? It’s more likely than you think) BUT ALSO if they do plan to make another ship like they said, they’re gonna need another Balmeran crystal to power it, which means more Shay!!

So now... that scene at the end. Shiro’s revival.

When Lance started crying, so did I. Literally, I saw his tears and I just fucking broke... my Lance stan heart couldn't take it...

and finally shiro’s white hair is ugly as fuck lmao

so TL;DR: This season was a big win in my opinion. I can’t remeber feeling this good about Voltron since maybe season two. I’m 100% ready to see some Lance and Hunk-centered storylines in season 7 if my predictions are right, and to hopefully see some main villain Haggar (FINALLY)

Thanks for reading!

#long post #VERY fucking long post lmao #this is my opinion in an episode by episode breakdown so i mostly didnt include opinions about shipping and all that #there are some predictions and theories tho!! #voltron #vld #voltron legendary defender #voltron s6 #vld s6 #voltron s6 spoilers #vld s6 spoilers #voltron spoilers #vld spoilers #s6 spoilers #not art

[ratsetflummi]

I got tagged by @chaotic-carnifex

Rules: Answer the questions and add 20 people that also follow you that you’d like to know more about

Nickname?

I don't really have a nickname? Some people call me Simmers, I guess.

Gender?

Male

Starsign?

Sagittarius

Height?

1,75m which is roughly 5'9''

Favorite feature?

I like my face? That sounds conceited to say, but sometimes I look at a mirror and I'm like wow, I'm handsome as fuck. (And then when I look too long it shifts to 'what strange new type of potato is that? oh, it's me'. but, shh, we don't talk about that)

Favorite color?

Blue. But I also accept black and orange

Favorite animal?

Are dragons considered a type of animal? Because, those. Otherwise, pretty much all types of cats.

Average hours spent sleeping?

Preferably 8.5, realistically 8.

Dogs or cats?

Cats. It's not that I think that dogs are inherently evil, I just had some vaguely uncomfortable experiences and now they make me nervous. Although I used to be nervous about cats too, before I had more regular contact with them.

Number of blankets you sleep with?

One. Always one. Doesn't matter how hot or cold it is. Sometimes it's thicker or thinner, but it's always one.

What’s your dream trip?

Mittelalterlich Phantasie Spektakulum in Speyer. With one extra day planned in to explore the city, and then a weekend of hanging out with friends, eating weird food, and going to six concerts by two bands. Which is incidentally what we have planned for august.

What’s your dream job?

Well, regular dream job would be a successful indie game developer. Actual dream job would be a dragon tamer or something along those lines.

When did you make this account?

May 29th 2013

How many followers?

162

How many pets you got?

Two cats. Lilly and Fauchi. Both names were kept from the previous owner, because I didn't realize that renaming them was an option, and now it's too late.

Best places to visit in your city/state/country?

Well, the old town of Regensburg is a UNESCO World Heritage Site, so all of that? If you're into that? Definitely the Stone Bridge and the Cathedral. The Walhalla and the Befreiungshalle are close by, too.

Favorite ice cream flavor?

Definitely Cookie Dough and Peanut Butter Cup. I used to like chocolate more, but recently I've switched over to various berry flavors. And ironically I really don't like vanilla.

How often do you read?

Almost constantly? The question doesn't specify that it has to be literature. I'm reading tumblr posts pretty much all day. And yesterday I fell asleep reading fanfic, only to today wake up, and immediately continue reading. Let's just say I read a lot.

My favorite study spots?

I still haven't managed to find one, the result of which is that I just don't study.

Favorite book series?

Actually I don't read that many books, and when I do, they're stand-alones. I do have a ridiculous amount of Warrior Cats books, although really only the first season was good. Other than that, maybe Inkworld? Which reminds me, I still have to buy the third part for my collection, I only read that once at the library. Would you consider John Dies At The End and This Book Is Full Of Spiders a series? Because those are also pretty good.

Tagging:

I'm just gonna tag my mutuals. Feel free to ignore if you don't want to. But also feel free to answer if I didn’t tag you.

@@thisfairytalegonebad @strongsoftboy @percy-desaster-rolo-iii @christoph-einar @orangelies @dancingsmily @cutehoruss @kyuunonana 

[sonderei]

I got bored and answered one of those 100-questions things so if you ever wanted to know a stupid amount of useless information about me read on, otherwise enjoy whatever content is in the next post!

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify

is your room messy or clean? my room is a mess, the rest of the apartment is pretty clean

what color are your eyes? brown

do you like your name? why? its grown on me. I used to get teased a lot in school “hey Ariel, where’s your best friend Flounder??” but now I work on Disney property and it’s on my name tag so I get to make a lot of kids (and adults) happy

what is your relationship status? been dating a small mess of a person for 4 years, whom I love dearly 

describe your personality in 3 words or less basically a cat

what color hair do you have? brown, or like a really dirty blonde if I spend enough time in the sun

what kind of car do you drive? color? a black 2013 hyundai accent hatchback (named Jazz)

where do you shop? where I shop: target, forever21, H&M, BoxLunch, Garage where I’d LIKE to shop: ModCloth, ASOS

how would you describe your style? I once bought an oversized Polariod windbreaker and I wear it everywhere I can??? I also love passive aggressive crop tops (”no thanks”) I wore it to a mandatory meeting at work at 9am and any time my managers asked me a question I just pointed to my shirt. So idk that should tell you something

favorite social media account I think I enjoy Instagram and Tumblr equally?

what size bed do you have? queen

any siblings? one full brother (5 years younger), one half brother on my dad’s side (13 years younger), and one half sister on my mom’s side (18 years younger). 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? idk because I haven’t traveled anywhere I’d actually like to live. I love the idea of living northwest US (Seattle, Portland) or in NZ or like Scotland or somewhere with beautiful scenery but like...never been so can’t say for sure?

favorite snapchat filter? flower crown

favorite makeup brand(s) NYX is pretty much all I use but I also do like bare minimum with my makeup

how many times a week do you shower? typically every other day unless I’m super gross

favorite tv show? too hard. Steven Universe, Game of Thrones, A:TLA, and Adventure Time?

shoe size? 7-8 depending on who makes them

how tall are you? smol. Like 5′3″ or so? 

sandals or sneakers? sneakers, unless going somewhere involving water and/or sand

do you go to the gym? nah. I’m up and down stairs at least 20 times a day, usually while carrying stuff. that’s my exercise.

describe your dream date sitting in front of the Ocean Voyager exhibit at the Georgia Aquarium all day. like literally that’s it. and my date lets me without asking to move on, and ideally enjoys it as much as I do.

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? uhhh like $25 because that’s how much you have to have to open a new bank account which I’ve been meaning to do for like two weeks now

what color socks are you wearing? not wearing any, but I was wearing shark socks all day

how many pillows do you sleep with? just one, super soft and squishy

do you have a job? what do you do? I'm a server at a restaurant in Disney Springs at Walt Disney World. Its challenging and often frustrating and stressful but I get to meet some really cool people so it evens out. (Pat Sajak from Wheel of Fortune was in last week, I didn’t ask him if I could buy a vowel because I have some dignity)

how many friends do you have? like true friends, would drop everything for me if I asked them / needed them to? I’d say 3. But my social group is like...maybe 10 people? That I actively try to hang out with semi regularly.

whats the worst thing you have ever done? I honestly don’t even know. I forgot a woman’s ketchup last week at work and apparently I ruined her entire Disney vacation so

whats your favorite candle scent? usually anything with jasmine, so long as it isn’t overpowering

3 favorite boy names Nathaniel, Sebastian, Milo 

3 favorite girl names Riley, Maisie, Phoebe

favorite actor? robert downey jr probs

favorite actress? tessa thompson?

who is your celebrity crush? ugh. tom holland, tessa thompson, rdj? 

favorite movie? Spirited Away or Howl’s Moving Castle

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I used to, before I worked at a bookstore. For some reason that killed my love for reading. But favorite books were the Bartimaeus Trilogy and Abarat.

money or brains? brains

do you have a nickname? what is it? Skip (long story short, its a Cabin Pressure reference because I’ve always wanted to be a pilot)

how many times have you been to the hospital? for myself? 5? maybe 6?

top 10 favorite songs in no particular order Evolve by Phoria Put ‘Em Up by Priority Cleopatra by The Lumineers Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man Miracle by CHVRCHES Dissolve by Absofacto Taro by alt-J Lavender by Two Door Cinema Club Dinosaurs by The Maccabees Ambling Alp by Yeasayer

do you take any medications daily? nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) ehh a bit on the oily side

what is your biggest fear? losing the ones I love

how many kids do you want? NONE ZERO NADA ZIP ZILCH FUCK NO

whats your go to hair style? pull it back, messy bun if possible

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) a p small apartment (but not tiny, I think it’s like 800-900 sq ft)

who is your role model? Steve Irwin

what was the last compliment you received? a guest at one of my tables told me I looked like one of the recent Bond girls

what was the last text you sent? bailing on a few friends who were going to Blizzard Beach because I was exhausted from having my dad in town for the last two days so I wanted to sleep

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? like 2 or 3. not very old

what is your dream car? realistic? a nice Subaru or Audi. Maybe a Tesla unrealistic? bugatti veyron

opinion on smoking? cigarettes? ew gross not around me also poor life choices weed? don’t care, just not around me please and thanks my other half is allergic

do you go to college? I did, graduated two years ago, still haven’t done anything with my life / degree

what is your dream job? anything working directly with animals, especially marine mammals, big cats, or non-venomous reptiles

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? big city. right in the middle of it.

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? not usually, I have specific stuff I use for my hair that’s a lot nicer than the stuff at hotels

do you have freckles? not like a ton but yeah

do you smile for pictures? if I feel like it? also depends on who’s taking the picture

how many pictures do you have on your phone? I’d say somewhere in the realm of like 650-800?

have you ever peed in the woods? yep, used to go camping a lot as a kid

do you still watch cartoons? hell yeah, I usually prefer them to anything else. Steven Universe, Adventure Time, Voltron, A:TLA, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends...that shit is my jam

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? mmmm Wendys but I usually don’t get c nugs from anywhere

Favorite dipping sauce? chick fil a sauce or ranch

what do you wear to bed? just underwear

have you ever won a spelling bee? no but I came close in middle school

what are your hobbies? not many tbh. I have a few reptiles that I take care of. I collect / trade Disney pins. I love swimming but don’t do it all that often. Uhhh...seeing how many times I can ride Kilamonjaro Safari in a row before the cast members begin to judge me?

can you draw? not really, no

do you play an instrument? nope, I can’t even read music and I can barely hum

what was the last concert you saw? uhhhh...I think Death Cab for Cutie and CHVRCHES?

tea or coffee? tea

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? Starbucks for drinks, Dunkin for food (donutssssss)

do you want to get married? yeah, eventually. I told the SO that ideally before I’m 30 and that we’re not having a wedding but we’re gonna elope instead because fuck weddings I don’t have the money for that or the patience to plan it

what is your crush’s first and last initial? not really a crush but more of a “current-and-potentially-forever life partner” but DU

are you going to change your last name when you get married? no idea. D wants to change their last name but idk if they’d take mine or they’d just change it to their middle name and then I’d take that? honestly it doesn’t really matter to me each way so long as I don’t get their current last name (because of bad associations)

what color looks best on you? no idea honestly. I prefer dark, muted blues?

do you miss anyone right now? my parents and siblings, and two of my best friends

do you sleep with your door open or closed? open, otherwise the cats would never let us sleep

do you believe in ghosts? nah, not really. I grew up in a town that had a bunch of history and by extension ghost stories, so it was more a part of “tourist culture” than something that seemed legitimate to me

what is your biggest pet peeve? I never know until someone starts doing it around me. but uhhhh I hate loud chewers, people that refuse to even try to see your side of an argument, and when you’re sitting somewhere in public like on a bench or something and there’s plenty of other empty seating options nearby and yet someone comes up and sits RIGHT NEXT TO YOU nope you know what that’s it I fucking hate that and it happens to me all the time at Disney

last person you called` I think my mom?

favorite ice cream flavor? cookies and cream, unless I’m at one of those places where you can basically make your own flavor in which case I will ALWAYS do a rose-infused ice cream with pistachios 

regular oreos or golden oreos? please don’t make me choose

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow!

what shirt are you wearing? not wearing one ;)

what is your phone background? just a basic stock photo of some ferns. kinda boring but I like simple backgrounds

are you outgoing or shy? its pretty even but if I had to say one over the other I’m probably slightly more outgoing than I am shy.

do you like it when people play with your hair? only people I know and allow. don’t just come up and start playing with my hair unless you KNOW that I’d be okay with it

do you like your neighbors? haven’t met them! we moved in like a month ago but we still haven’t seen anyone that lives on our floor

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? if I remember, but honestly I’m really bad about doing it unless I’m in the shower in which case it’s every time I take a shower

have you ever been high? nope

have you ever been drunk? sadly no. I have a ridiculously high natural alcohol tolerance, so I get sick to my stomach before I can even manage tipsy.

last thing you ate? pizzaaaaaaa

favorite lyrics right now idek and that’s a lot of effort so sorry here’s me “free pass” I’m using it on this question next

summer or winter? ugh winter always I can’t stand the heat there’s only so many layers you can take off

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? milk or white. milk for straight eating, white for flavoring other things

favorite month? october

what is your zodiac sign leo!

who was the last person you cried in front of? my significant other

#I was bored #fite me #in case anyone ever wanted to know what I do for a living #or what my favorite songs are #or what color my eyes are #now you know

[eren-s]

tag game

Rules:

Always post the rules

Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you

Write 11 questions of your own

Tag 11 people

tagged by: the lovely @tatakaeeren thank youuuuu <3

tagging: @yaboylevi and @uttsukushi because i would love to to know your answers to some of these questions and all that but don’t feel pressured to answer this if you don’t want to c: also tagging anyone else who wants to do this

1.- If you could date one anime characters who would it be?

These type of questions always make me think that i love things differently from other people... or something? lol because i never get a crush on the characters i  like... i know this isn’t mean to be a serious question and all that, you know but kahjdkhasjdg i won’t date anyone lmao i prefer being by myself even if it gets a bit lonely sometimes 

2.- What was your first anime? 

Definitely dragon ball, i have many many memories from it from my childhood, my mom still doesn’t like it haha my brother on the other hand loves snk and levi is his favorite, he also watches some other animes from time to time  

3.- Fictional character or real people?

Fictional character, i have been there and loved real people (as in idols etc) and it’s draining and tiring and not something i would like to do ever again lol

4.- What’s one of your dreams? 

Writing a book, i have had this dream since i was a child and i actually wrote a so called book when i was like 13 haha but it’s a mess so i have it hidden somewhere in my room, i also used to get praises here and there when i wrote poems, etc for school. Tbh idk if i will ever be able to accomplish it because the career i’m majoring in, in college has nothing to do with this type of thing so yeah but maybe some day as for now i still write fics in my free time

5.-  Favorite books of all time?

I wish i read more buuuut i will just mention the one i’ve been reading recently which is ‘everyday’ by david levithan, i have yet to finish it, but i love the way it’s written and some of the things the author writes about in the book hit close home for me, i have some favorite quotes as well and i just love the book jasgdjhsagd gotta finish it before this year ends 

6.- What’s your dream country to live in?

I like my country but maybe spain, places i would like to visit tho: korea and japan also any other countries in south america because all i know is my own country and i’m curious lol  

7.-  Isabelle/Levi/Farlan or Armin/Mikasa/Eren? 

why... the shiganshina trio because the bonds of friendship between the three of them are lovely, as for the acwnr trio... it makes my heart ache and i can’t watch/read it w/o crying lmao 

8.- What’s your otp (only one)? Eren + happiness 

9.-  Drabble or Fanfic? 

Fanfic, although i really admire people who can write short things ajsgdjhasgd haha how do you do that 

10.- Your hogwarts housse (if you don’t have any cause you’ve never made the test just answer muggle, or go made it !) -

11.- How many time do you spent on tumblr ?(daily)  

…I check it several times through the day but the time i spend on it varies? it depends on wether or not i’m trying to upload gifs or something or if my dash has new content or if i’m talking with someone and stuff like that haha i think i spend more time over at twitter 

12.- Your top 3 anime openings? 

Sora ga Aozora de Aru Tame ni by Glay 

Know know know by Does

Guren no yumiya by Linked Horizon

13.-  Quick! you have the power to bring one character back from the dead (with no secondary effects) who would it be? 

Carla Jaeger, jsagdhjasgdhjsa Eren has been missing his mom for years, i just- need okay

14.- If you could crossover 2 animes, which ones would they be?

omg gintama x shingeki haha that would be soooo funny to watch

15.- Choose 3 hair colors.Ok. Ready? Now tell me your fav character with that hair color.

pink hair - kominato haruichi

white hair - gintoki

black hair - hijikata

16. Guilty pleasure?? (food, music, movies, etc)

food: like anything sweet, i love sweets... cakes, ice cream, cookies, etc lol

music: maybe those songs that are famous and that you don’t want to openly like but you end up liking them anyway?? haha

17.- Pick two characters to protect you and the rest will kill you [choose from here x]

yo eren and luffy for the first part and then the rest could kill me 

18.- In which anime do you think you would fit the best if you were to live in their world?

relife... i have no idea if you have watched it but i am one of those adults (ugh yeah i’m an adult lol) who feels like their life isn’t going in the direction they want it to go and i really love the idea that the author of this manga (which was adapted into the anime last year) offers, it deals with important topics such as: depression, suicide, being unemployed/not being successful at the expected age by society... the consequences it has in your life and stuff like that? i just think i would like to live inside that universe because the characters are really really kind towards each other and they help each other out and there’s the particular relationship between the protagonist named Arata and Yoake which is the person who helps Arata to ‘relife’ his life haha (spoilers maybe if you end up deciding to look this one up) anyway this relationship esp is my favorite, i just LOVE how they support each other

19.- A night out! ..pick 3 characters and tell me: who is buying the drinks, who is the designated driver and who is the one dancing while singing barbie by aqua

hanji is buying the drinks, annie is the designated driver and the one dancing while singing barbie by aqua is definitely sasha 

20.- A movie that you can watch a million times and will never bore you? Why?

any animated movie! be it a disney movie, or one from studio ghibli,  i... really love animated movies 

21.- Do you have a favorite seiyuu(s) which one(s)? 

I’m not much of the kind of person who gets enthusiastic over voice actors or any other type of famous person in the industry tbh... not even the authors of the mangas itself because i don’t like getting invested into people but rather i fell in love w/ the characters they create more than anything else so i don’t really have a favorite seiyuu 

22.- How would you like Snk to end: everyone dies, a bitter sweet ending, a happy one or an open ending?  

Victoria you sure love making these kind of painful questions lol jk but i haven’t really thought about it, being realistic there’s no way there’s gonna be a happy ending at least not a “wholesome” one i think? I would really hate it if everyone died at the end though... at least one of these persons who sacrificed their lives has to live to see a new beginning, or new something start... i don’t care who although my bias would love for it to be eren and all the kids (and the vets) but just someone, you know? As for an open ending it depends... like what if it ends right before eren is about to die... or on some really ambiguous scene? tbh i would like to feel satisfied with the ending more than anything else be it a happy/sad or open one just something that ties everything up nicely... that’s my humble opinion 

my questions: ( i will just write 4 or 5 because this is long enough as it is and i’m not a really creative person lol )

- What’s one thing you really like about yourself? - What do you do to cheer yourself up when you are feeling down? - Do you play any instrument? - Are you a cat person or a dog person?

#tag game #pp #this is long and i talk A LOT so if you read this thing till the end thank you in advance #gracias <3

[chatuoir]

catastrophic affairs, truly (chap 5)

chaps 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / on ao3

hello it has been 500 years since i last updated but the lovely AmelineAmira on ao3 wrote a fic inspired by this one? omg? and that reminded me that i needed to update (i had the chapter ready i was just being lazy)(thank u <3) so yall should definitely check that fic out but in the meantime here is another chapter lets get LIT (its like midnight goodnight)

Marinette is smothered in hugs as soon as she steps into the bakery. Her parents apologize to the customers before pulling her into the living room, clearly scared about her well-being. They'd heard about the attack on the news and keep inspecting her to check for injuries; she assures them that she's fine.

“Really, Maman, I'm okay. The broken glass didn't even cut me. I promise.” She says. Her parents exchange a glance before turning back to her.

“We’re glad you're okay,” Her father starts, “But what about the stuff we’ve heard about this Chat Noir business?” Marinette silently curses. Shit. The attack had distracted her from thinking of a good way to bring it up.

She takes a deep breath. Well. “I know this is going to sound really weird, but I can explain. The truth is... Chat Noir is my fake boyfriend.”

Her parents stare at her for a few moments, eerily quiet. Marinette stands there waiting for a reaction, but there isn't one. Finally, she starts again.

“So... Chat asked me to fake date him so Ladybug wouldn't think he was lying to her about him having a girlfriend; I felt bad for him, but I also thought it was really funny, so I agreed. We set up some conditions so this doesn't go too far, and I can opt out whenever I want.” Marinette sees her parents visibly relax a little, but they're still confused. At last, Tom speaks up.

“I think the only question I can really ask is... can I meet this Chat?” Marinette hesitates in answering. Fortunately, she's saved by a bell ringing from inside the store. Sabine goes to check and brings back a plate of cookies and friend- in fact, she brings back a plate of chocolate chip cookies and a superhero friend.

“Hi Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng,” Chat greets after inhaling a couple cookies, “I'm Chat Noir, but I think you knew that. I just wanted to say that everything that's happened to your daughter today with the akuma was my fault and I apologize. Did she tell you exactly what's going on?” He says in one spurt. Marinette gestures for him to calm down and breathe.

“It's fine, I told them.” She says. He looks noticeably relieved.

“I didn't want you two to stress out or anything, I mean, Marinette was safe during the attack, if you count being trapped inside a glass cat head safe. Which, by the way, I'm really sorry for-- I didn't think people would overreact to something like who I'm dating. Or, you know, in this case, fake dating.” Honestly, this boy doesn't know when to stop talking; Marinette’s almost embarrassed for him. Luckily, her parents smile at him warmly.

“Thanks for letting us know, Chat.” Tom says. “We trust that you and Marinette can handle this, but if anything starts to trouble you, don't be afraid to come to us. Both of you.” Okay, dad. We can't just adopt every guy I (fake) date. Marinette thinks.

Chat grins, nods, and takes a few more cookies. “Thank you for everything. Can I speak to Marinette for a couple minutes?”

“I'm really sorry about everything that happened today. If you want to call it quits right now, that's fine with me. I can ask Alya to take all the pictures off her blog.” Chat says.

“No, no, really, it's fine! You wouldn't believe how many times I've been in serious situations like today’s, especially with the amount of attacks that happen in my school. Seriously. I forgive you. And if it had really bothered me that much I’m sure I would’ve asked Alya myself. Really, I’m okay.”

“So... we’re still fake dating?”

“Duh. You literally just met my parents. I'm not gonna break up with you right now.” Chat breathes out a sigh of relief. Then he rubs his temples before speaking up.

“You know what I just realized? I don't have any way to contact you besides like this, face to face. Can I have your phone number or something? Wait, no, you might know the civilian me. What about IM? I'll make a new one just for you. Maybe something like, small x - big x - Mari’s - underscore - true - underscore - love  - big x - small x’, just to keep everything fresh.”

Marinette jokes. “Who are you, a scene kid from 2009?” They both snort at that.

“Like you have any better ideas.”

“Yeah, I don’t. Mine’s just my name.” Chat makes a big show of committing that to memory, as if he’s going to mix it up and find a different Marinette Dupain-Cheng somewhere on the internet. Marinette has to admit that he’s a pretty funny guy, even if he tries too hard to be cool sometimes.

A few minutes later she's shooing him out the bakery door while he salutes and blows a kiss. A couple customers smile; Marinette catches a few of them sneaking glances and laughs to herself. The fun has only just begun, she thinks.

It's past midnight, and Marinette knows she’s supposed to be on her rounds right now, except she isn’t really sure what to say to Chat as Ladybug after the day’s events. Technically, there was no way she could’ve helped him during the attack since she was quite literally trapped, but she still feels kind of bad. They’re supposed to be a team.

Marinette lays in bed for a while and listens as the city settles. There’s usually a couple cars left at this hour, and of course Paris is still ablaze- they don’t call it the City of Lights for no reason- but it feels eerily quiet and dark. I’m probably sleep-deprived, she thinks. Suddenly, her phone lights up and nearly blinds her. She fumbles for it and reads the notification.

New IM chat request from xXmaris_true_loveXx

Marinette has to smother herself with her blanket before she laughs too hard and wakes the entire city. She accepts the request and sees that Chat’s already sent a couple messages.

xXmaris_true_loveXx: hello my false lover (i hope)

i have a question

do you happen to be friends with lb or can you contact her

if so where tf is she?

oh shoot it's like 12:17 im sorry if i woke you up

She frantically types a message back, whispering for Tikki to get ready to transform her.

Marinettedcheng: hi chat no u didnt wake me i do in fact have a way to contact her i will tell her ur waiting & congrats on finding the right mari

xXmaris_true_loveXx: ok good i was just worried cus she wasn’t answering. get some rest you need your beauty sleep

Marinettedcheng: cant tell if thats an insult or compliment but thx i will see u 2mo

xXmaris_true_loveXx: wow i would never slander my fake gf </3... goodnight

“He certainly is a character, isn’t he?” Tikki says. Marinette rolls her eyes, her face shining from the glow of the city.

“Sure. Let’s get going. Tikki, spots on!” Marinette transforms at 12:20 and heads out to the Eiffel Tower.

-

It’s quite relaxing to be above the city in the dead hours of the night, with everything sparkling and the cool breeze rustling through the air. Ladybug finds her partner sitting on a ledge, lost in thought. She settles down next to him and they silently greet each other. It's awkward for a while before she speaks up.

“Hey.. so. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. Again. For not showing up earlier today? But I was in a sticky situation.” He smiles softly and Ladybug catches it, his face lit up by the moonlight.

“I forgive you. Again. It's okay, my Lady. I promise.” It's still a little awkward.

“Okay. I just feel guilty. Like, all these people were looking up to me to help them and be their hero, but I wasn't even there.”

“But your trusty sidekick was there,” Chat says with a grin.

She gently shoves him. “Chat, we talked about this. You're my partner, not my sidekick. We're equal. We balance each other out, that’s kinda the point. Duh.” He lets out a short laugh.

“Yeah, yeah, you're right. Team Miraculous, am I right?” She nods, glad that the slight tension in the air is gone. The two fist bump before settling back into the silence of the night.

A few more moments pass.

“We should... uh... patrol now?” Ladybug whispers. Chat’s eyes widen.

“Yeah, yep, you're right, I’ll do the north side of the city,” He raises his baton and helps Ladybug to her feet, “See you in 30.” Then he does an Olympics-worthy dive off the side of the tower, extending the pole to vault to the next building. Ladybug snorts as he leaves. Show-off. Again, she thinks.

--

Ladybug catches a couple thieves before finishing her patrol; they’re some sneaky tourists who wanted free souvenirs, but they at least have the dignity to look guilty when she turns them in.

Chat is sitting on the building across from the Dupain-Cheng bakery. Ladybug wants to laugh; he probably thinks his fake girlfriend is in there, asleep, not at all thinking about the crazy day they just had like he definitely is. She suddenly realizes he’s speaking to her and snaps out of her trance.

“So... did you hear about what happened to me and Marinette?” Ladybug snorts. She’d read his mind.

“Yeah, someone told me to check the Ladyblog, like, a half hour after you confessed to me.”

“Hmm. Seems awfully suspicious. You sure you didn’t expose me?” Chat interrogates, but he’s smirking. Ladybug rolls her eyes.

“Pssh. You probably submitted that post yourself, because you thought I didn’t believe you or something,” She jokes. He freezes for a moment, but she doesn’t notice. Biting her tongue to keep from laughing, she grins and adds, “But you do like Marinette, I can tell. I mean, why else would you be dating her?”

He nervously laughs but tries to play it off. “Yeah, she’s great. It’s going well. But hey, that’s enough about my love life. What are your plans for tomorrow? I never got to ask.” Shit. Uh, I’m going on a fake date with you in civilian form, while trying to keep it realistic enough so other people think we’re actually dating- but only until your plan of making me, as Ladybug, jealous finally works- which probably won’t ever happen, so, honestly, you tell me.

Later, she would wonder if it was the sheer amount of exhaustion from the day, the huge billboard right in front of her, or the curiosity of the cat (especially a certain Chat) which made her difficult situation a whole lot worse. But at the time, all she could think was to say something as ridiculous as possible so he wouldn’t ask any questions.

“I’m, uh, also going on a date. With.. um, the one and only, uh...” Ladybug drops her gaze from Chat’s eyes (which turns out to be an accident) and says with confidence, “Adrien Agreste.”

#marinette cheng #chat noir #marichat #ml fanfiction #love square #the CAT fic #lucia.txt #sweet dreams yall

[casperjeon]

oopsxdaphne

“….Dude, obviously you’ve totally come into yourself and you’re like all cute and Casper-like!” Daphne quickly spat, cursing herself for bringing up the subject in the first place. Casper was good at keeping her thoughts underwraps, but Daphne was certain she’d dwell on the thought, even if it was just for a bit. Sighing, she let out an echoing groan, shaking her head. “You know what, I think you’ve been spending way too much time with Officer Assface. Seriously, is he rubbing off on you?” Not that the blonde would actually know how the man acted. Every time they were around each other, he practically stabbed her with his gaze. “The scent of bacon doesn’t smell good on you, Cas.” Her face twisted as if she’d been hit in the face with a mighty stink. Okay, so maybe the girl was a bit jealous of Casper and her unspoken friendship with the cop, but she’d never admit it. There was no point, between him and her, there was no competition; She was better. “I’m not a complete idiot, give me some credit.” She was well aware of right from wrong. Daphne just happened to prefer doing the wrong. “You trying to tell me you don’t have a name for your punch? We might have to change that…” She mused before huffing. “Fine, fine, I’ll let you sleep on it for now. We have other pressing issues to deal-Oh thanks!” She all but snatched the snacks from the other, wasting little time in opening the granola bar. Chomping down on it, she stuffed the cookies into her pocket as she practically bounced after the hunter. “Mmm what?!” Bright features twisted in amusement as she chewed. “I’m stoked?! How are you not pumping with adrenaline right now? Really?” Daphne honestly didn’t have any chill, but it never seemed to stop her from getting shit done before.

“I have no idea if I’ve actually become a whole person or not,” she said bluntly, pursing her lips, “For all we know this version of me is just a cluster of defense mechanisms.” Casper sighed immediately after, looking down at her feet for a moment in thought. She hated thinking about this, about her competency in anything in life, but it couldn’t be helped sometimes. It was all that drove her in life to where she was. Which sometimes seemed like a curse, but it brought on good things too she supposed. “What, Theo?” she actually chortled at that suggestion and shook her head, “He’s not ‘rubbing off on me’ nor do I smell like bacon, thank you very much.” She liked to think that she didn’t smell of anything - she liked to keep off any distinct smells so that she wasn’t easy to track. But even then if she had to say she smelled like anything, it’d be of lavender - barely, but still it was there.

“I never said you were an idiot, I just said you did idiotic things,” she said, “There’s a clear distinction.”  She laughed a little, shaking her head, “No, I don’t name my punches. I try not to punch people at all if I can help it - we might need to change that about you.” Casper made sure to leave the main light of her living room on before slipping out her door and held it open for Daphne to come through. “I feel the adrenaline alright, but it’s mostly from the anxiety and fear,” she said with a raise of her brows.

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

  Mar 28, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne

“Depends on who you ask.” Just like everyone else, Daphne wouldn’t mind sinking into the background once in a whole. Though when she did fall under that sickening spell, she usually locked herself away. It was easier to lose herself in a canvas than it was to actually express her emotions. It worked for her and in all honesty, no one ever really seemed to mind. “If it makes you feel any better, there are fifty-year-olds out in the world still trying to come into themselves, so you got them beat.” She was talking about her old man, but Casper had no way of knowing that. “You know a good thing about always finding trouble? You never have to wait for it to sneak up on you.” Her mouth twisted into a wide grin, her body turning to sway a little. “Oh please, who is going to arrest me? I mean seriously? I’m too cute to be behind bars.” Lifting her hands, she placed them under her chin to give the other an innocent look. It probably looked more terrifying than adorable. “Come on! Are you serious?!” As if Daphne didn’t already dive face first into every stupid idea that fluttered into her head. “Would you rather I stay young, dumb and unprepared?” Sure, one of those would probably never change, but that wasn’t the point. “I’m not asking to become an assassin. I just want to know a few things, you know, other than my signature cunt punch.” A move she’d had to use more than she’d like to admit. “Can you just consider it? For me? Please?!” Her tone was whiney and her bottom lip puckered out into a pout. “Damn Casper, do you have to shit on my marching band all the time?!” Stomping her foot against the ground once more, she murmured a little to herself. Shifting when Casper returned to the kitchen, the female let out an obnoxious laugh before making eye contact.“Huh? Oh… I-Is that an actual question? Both… Clearly, I want both.” She’d eat the granola bar right away and stuff her pockets full of Oreos. Save a few for later, Napoleon Dynamite style. “You’re going to stop crushing my hopes and dreams one day, you hear me.” “I was born ready. Let’s do this!” Insert fist pump from The Breakfast Club.

Casper shrugged. Being invisible had it’s perks, as much as it caused a lot of negativity when you least expected it to. Double edged sword that she finally learned how to wield to some degree. Or at least she believed she did - it made her feel a lot better when she allowed herself to fester in her apartment a lone for days on end. “That somehow makes me feel worse,” she said but with a chuckle, “What if I didn’t actually come into myself and only actually come into myself at fifty three? This is a pressing matter, Daph why’d you have to mention that.” And though she said it in a joking manner, it did hold a smidgen of true worries. She was overly anxious - she was very aware. “Or you could avoid trouble at all costs - it’s a lot easier. Take me for example,” she titled her head at her blonde friend. Once she knew how to weave her way in and out of situations, she’d become an expert at avoiding trouble. “As much as the cute sentiment is true, I don’t think cuteness is gonna stop anyone from arresting you, Daph.”

“At least you;re aware of your dumb actions,” she sighted again, this time louder. Casper honestly didn’t want to let Daphne give herself more of a reason to dive headfirst into whatever stupid idea she had brewing in the depths of her head, but she also knew how much she pestered when she didn’t get what she wanted. “Something tells me the fact you named your punch means you’ve punched people too much already - which doesn’t help your case, honestly,” the girl raised her dark eyebrows, “But I’ll consider it - which also means I don’t always rain on your parade.” She handed a tied off packet of Oreos and a granola bar to Daphne before closing her cabinet.

Casper did find herself smiling a little at the goofiness of the fist pump Daphne displayed as she unlocked her door and opened it, turning back to her with the same smile. “You have no chill, you know that right?”

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

  Mar 24, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne

Her brows pulled together as she allowed herself to get lost in thought. It was easy for others to see Daphne in a certain light. The human actually made a point of making sure she came off this or that way. Anything to make people think she actually had a fucking clue what she was doing. In all honesty, Daphne was just a lost little girl trying to find her place in the world. No, scratch that. She wanted to be involved in a world much more magical than her own. “Trust me, you would have not wanted that.” A laugh escaped her, even though her words held truth. “I didn’t really come into myself until my late teens. Before that? Yeah, let’s just say I was trouble without reason.” At least now she was working towards an outcome. “Eh, what can I say? Some people did drugs, others focused on sex, me? I was more into making a mess of things.” She gave Casper a toothy grin. “It’ll forever be my favorite pastime.” “Yo! That actually reminds me, do you think you could like show me some moves?” She asks as she wildly swings her fist through the air. “I figured I should probably look into learning some defense. You know, since I’m always meddling.” Plus, she wanted to go back to the deli and show that Wolf what was up. “Fine, fine, I’ll put it on the back burner. But only for now.” She’d remember to set up a profile for her friend by the end of the week. “Dude, can you imagine how dull life would be if I wasn’t around to force you out of the house? You’d probably smell like a cat lady and have bedsores all over you. So, realistically, you should thank the many lords from above for blessing you with me.” Sighing, she twisted towards the cabinets. Yanking one open, the blonde began searching around for a snack as she listened to the other. Daphne was going to need some fuel if they were going to be breaking and entering. “Um, can we talk about how cool like an undercover mission to prison would be? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’d be a little scared… But come on?! It would be awesome, no?”

“It’s better than blending into the background,” she said quietly, but very quickly shook her head and waved her hand in front of her face as if to brush what she had just said off. Because really, she was being hypocritical - she liked the quiet she encased herself in. But it’d be a lie to say she didn’t feel inferior to others. “Are you kidding me? I didn’t come into myself until I left college,” Casper said this with a light laugh though. “I can tell,” she shrugged her shoulders, nodding, “At least you aren’t locked up behind bars, which is good enough I suppose. As long as you keep it that way it’s fine to go on this way.”

She grimaced a little as Daphne began wildly swinging her arms around, taking a step back even if she wasn’t near the axis of possible damage. “You know if I teach you you’ll just dive head first into trouble even more frequently, so understand my reluctance,” she said with a slight sigh, “Plus I’d rather not make it easier for you to feel like you can pick fights with people who can easily kill you.” The girl took in a labored breath, “I hope it stays in that back burner for as long aa possible”

Casper pursed her lips. “Technically that’d be impossible since I have a job to keep me out of bed, but sure, I guess you can think of it that way,” she looked at Daphne and quickly noticed her sifting through her stuff - probably looking for a snack. That was usually the case. Easily, she walked to the cabinet with the actual to-go food and looked back at her blonde friend from her place. “Granola bar or Oreos?” she asked before grabbing a granola bar for herself, “I’d like to never really end up in a situation where I have to think about something like a prison break.” She looked around for a moment before breathing out, “Ready to go?”

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

  Mar 13, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne

“Um, maybe if I was mousy and adorable like you. Sure. Or even silently charming like Sam. Both of you guys would totally be heard. But me? Basic little me? Yeah, no way in hell, Cas.” Even though she was an only child, Daphne never felt like her father actually heard her. It was always a war. Always a back and forth because he wanted things a certain way and she wanted them another way. Perhaps she was just a spoiled little brat, which could probably be a part of it, but at least she wasn’t one to deny it. “Being silent is actually a real struggle for me, okay? I have so much that I want to say and I know the world is just longing to hear it all.” Now she was just being a pain to bother Casper. “But yeah, I’ll be a good girl. Cause I am not trying to add any new stains to the dirty shirt that is my police record.” Hmm. Maybe she should look into finding someone to clean that up for her. It certainly was a thought. “Oh come on!” Her tone quickly shifted into a whiny pout. “Casper, please!” Letting out an overly dramatic groan, she tossed her head back as she stomped a foot on the ground. “I didn’t say anything about romance. It would just be a little friend date. It could be fun!” The blonde urged as she made her way into the other’s kitchen. “At least let me hook you up with a tinder!” “You should be happy that I have such an eclectic social network. If not, we might not be able to go on these amazing little field trips of ours.” Leaning back against one of the counters, she gazed at the hunter with an innocent smile. “What? Sweet talking can get you a lot of things, Cassie.” Her lids battered before she snorts. “As if. Let’s just say, I have my way and they work. So it’s a win/win.” Tilting her head to the side, she thought Casper’s words over before shrugging. “I mean… That does only seem fair. Just promise you’ll visit me in prison and give me money for the commissary.”

She furrowed her eyebrows at the comment. She supposed she was that to an extent - especially the mousy part. There was a reason why she played to being lowkey so much she never really took attention and she got used to it. She liked it even. It gave her the upper hand a lot of the time. “What? When have you ever been basic, Daph?” she was genuinely bewildered at the sentiment, “You were the type of girl I wish I was when I was younger.” Which was true, because then she would’ve been able to contend between her two sisters - who had such loud presences that it made her shrink in comparison. Which again, was ironic since she was the oldest daughter. “Looks like we have opposite problems then,” she said lightheartedly, actually breathing out in a chuckle, “It still appalls me that you have a record, you know? It’s actually kind of funny.”

“Yeah, you say this now but wait until the ‘friend date’ tries to put their moves on me and I have to suffer through the night,” Casper said, pursing her lips in defiance. She’d tried the whole putting herself out there for awhile in college - worked against her instead of her in her favour. She groaned again, this time a lot louder, at the prospect of a Tinder. “How many horrible ideas can you throw my way in one night, Daph?”

“Or better yet, I would stop having stress headaches from all these ‘amazing little field trips’.” Which was a little over-exaggeration, but she did feel one edging on at that moment. She really didn’t want to think about this ‘eclectic social network’ right now - a conversation that she decided to catalog for another time to brig up.”I wouldn’t know, Daphne, I’m not as much as a smooth talker as you,”  Casper chortled, shaking her head. She reached up to the top shelf of her bookcase next to her TV and grabbed what she needed to put in the last holster stuck to the side. “Oh definitely, I’ll visit you as much as I can. Start a fund to bail you out or something, “ Casper smiled, amused at the thought, “Though to be real, I wouldn’t even let you step in prison at all.”

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

( shhh don't worry about it )

  Mar 11, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne

“At least I’m self-aware.” A goofy grin is plastered on her face, her nose crinkling a little before she rolls her eyes. “If I wasn’t loud, people wouldn’t hear me.” That wasn’t exactly true, but given if she was yelling, it was hard to ignore her. It was a trait she’d picked up at a young age. “Oh come on, Ass-” She cuts herself short, remembering the promise she’d made. Best not to push the hunter any more than she already was. “-Cas. I can be good, believe it or not.” Especially when she wanted to get her way. “I don’t plan on running around town screaming our plans out to the world.” She wasn’t the type of villain to spill her evil scheme to the hero; Daphne was no cliche. “On a side note that has almost nothing to do with the subject at hand. You should totally let me set you up on a blind date!” Her features lit up like the sky on the Fourth of July. “And before you piss on that idea, I know nice people.” Sure, most of them probably weren’t good enough for Casper, but a harmless date couldn’t hurt… Right? “Promise me you’ll at least consider it?” God, she could get so easily distracted. Dropping her head back, she groaned loudly. “You only like it cause it wants to kill me…” That damn coffee table would be the death of her, she was certain of it. Cringing a little the blonde pushed her lips together before blowing out a puff of air. “Yep… I think the fuzz are hiding something.” A lot, actually. They never had time to answer her questions and to say they gave off a shady vibe would be putting it lightly. “Ah, and this is where you underestimate my human abilities. You could say a friend of mine is good buddies with the guy who set up their security feeds.” By friend, she meant Lux. But the ponytailed girl couldn’t really say that. “He owes my friend big time and after a bit of sweet talking-” Blackmail. Sweet talking meant blackmailing. “I’ve got the codes to disarm their cameras.” “So… Not exactly a walk in the park, but a little bit easier than a marathon?”

“That’s not strictly true,” she said in return, almost defensively, “People would still har you if you’re worth listening to.” She was a true believer of how words can shine through quality and not through how much you shove them in people’s face. Mostly because she grew up being smothered and hidden by children louder and more confident than she was. Casper was always a quiet child and still a generally quiet person. But sometimes she wished she wasn’t. She shot Daphne a look when she almost uttered that horrible nickname - her face relaxing when she didn’t. “I know you can be when you want to,” she replied, sighing, “Why’d you think I’m even agreeing in the first place.” Her blonde friend was capable, as much as she was overbearing at times.

Casper immediately groaned at that suggestion. “Daph, that’s the last thing I’d ever want to do,” she shook her head, facepalming briefly, “Remember, me and romance don’t go well together. Period.” Her one shot at it during college left a very very bitter taste in her mouth - she would never let herself go through that much pain that way ever again. She had enough on her plate as it was.

Huffing, she pursed her lips. Daphne wasn’t wrong - Casper knew for a fact that they hid things that were detrimental. Maybe, just maybe, a part of her thought that this wasn’t such a bad idea. To just peek through other things too while she was there. But of course there was the fact that it was very very illegal. She narrowed her eyes at Daphne’s explanation. “Your connections are suspiciously scary,” she sighed heavily, “’Sweet talking’. Of course you did.” Casper paused for a moment, letting the silence settle around them before she finally looked back up at her friend. “I swear if anything bad happens, I’m putting all the blame on you.” Except she wouldn’t, really.

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

  Mar 9, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne

“Yep, you heard me right my friend. A freaking lead!” Daphne couldn’t help but puff her chest out proudly. It was almost as if she’d won an award or something when realistically, her lead would probably get them nowhere. Regardless, she was clearly pleased with herself. “I’m adorable and nosy.” She paused, tilting her head from side to side. “And I’m not opposed to using force or blackmail, you know, the works.” It also helped that no one else seemed interested in figuring anything out. Most people appeared indifferent or were quick to push the whole thing off on kids being kids. As easy as that seemed to believe, Daphne didn’t buy it. There was more to the story than it being a childish prank and she was going to get to the bottom of it. “That’s not insulting whatsoever.” The blonde huffed, narrowing olive hues at the other. “I’ll have you know that I’ve been sexting with a hot college chick from two towns over. As far as I’m concerned, that’s a date.” A smug smile pulled at pale lips, before a loud “HA!” escaped her. “Fine, I’ll put your nickname on hold.” For now. She’d drop dead before retiring Assie-Cassie. “Let’s do this!” Shifting, she hopped up from the couch, only to stumble forward into the coffee table. “Ah, shit” Catching herself, the human quickly straightens herself in an attempt to play it off. “Y-You should really put that thing somewhere else. It’s completely in the way…” “Anyway, our first stop is- DRUM ROLL PLEASE!” She began smacking her hands roughly against her thighs. “The Police Station. You’re going to help me break in.” The words fell from her mouth in a messy fury. “Alright, lock and load, let’s go…”

She actually chuckled a little at that. “Those are two things you definitely are,” she said, crouching down to the cabinet under her sink and grabbing her usual gear, “That, and excessively loud.” Casper didn’t say it with any malice in her voice, it was just very factual, “Which won’t help us at all if you want to go through with this.” As much as she seemed like she was too tired to participate in this, Casper was most definitely interested in getting down to the bottom of this. Knowing the things she knew  there was no denying the fact that it wasn’t just some joke. She feared things would get worse, really.

“Hey, it wasn’t an insult either way,” she said as she turned her torso so she could see Daphne, tone casual, “If it makes you feel better, that’s more action than I’ve ever gotten ever.” With a flick of her wrist, her retractable quarterstaff unveiled with a soft click in front of her. She began swinging it briefly before folding it back and placing it in a peculiar holster on the side of her left thigh. “I like my coffee table where it is,” Casper said with a wave of her hand as she continued to go around her house to get her stuff before returning.

Sighing, she crossed her arms across her chest to listen to what Daphne had to say. And immediately, her expression morphed from neutral to distress. “Daph- the police station?” Casper wasn’t shocked, but she was definitely beginning to feel an onslaught of anxiety and stress swarm her stomach, “How are we not supposed to get caught, Daph? I-” She huffed, punching the bridge of her nose. “You’re saying this as if it’s a walk in a park.”

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

  Mar 7, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne

“No, no, no! Don’t you use that sad, whiny tone with me!” The blonde quickly shook her head, causing her ponytail to whip around. “Are you serious right now?” Stilling, she plops herself down on the sofa, sitting Indian style. “First off, we have you.” Casper may not exactly enjoy these types of things, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t skilled. “Secondly-” She lifted two fingers, wiggling them a little. “I have a lead for us to follow.” Alright, so it wasn’t so much as a real lead as it was gossip being sent into TPT. Either way, it was something. And as far as Daphne was concerned something was always better than nothing. “Yeah, it’s Friday night and I had a date.” And by date she meant a private get together with her shitty apartment and easel. “But here I am!” Casper probably knew better than to fall for her nonsense, but it never stopped her from trying. “So stop pouting-” Reaching for one of the throw pillows on the couch, she mustered all of her strength to toss it at the Hunter. “And get ready to solve this shit! I need you, Assie-Cassie.”

She groaned again, this time a little softly so as to not enforce the ‘sad and whiny’ sentiment. Casper realised that sure, she maybe was a bit too exasperated for her age group (as pointed out by most of her family), but she really just enjoyed holing herself in. As much as she was this way, she did feel an obligation to go out - she couldn’t let Daphne get herself into some dangerous mess and knowing her, she could very well do it without trying. “A lead?” she finally turned back to Daphne, though her face stayed placid with a hint of exasperation, “How the hell do you get this information?” Not even she had anything, and she knew a lot of things.

“You see, a date to you is the same as me streaming games at home,” she said with a sigh, her cheek smushed into the arm of the couch. She looked at her friend in silence for a moment, considered her options - and finally swung her legs down the arm of the couch and stood up. “Just as long as you stop calling me that, I’m here,” Casper raised her eyebrows at Daphne before stretching her hands up and walking over to prepare her gear.

  8 NOTES

( daphne )

( i literally cackled at assie cassie kldasfjkfas )

  Mar 6, 2018

elixhowls

elixhowls

oopsxdaphne:

♫♪ “Shit’s happening round Castor. We about to get our Daphne and Velma on. We’re going to solve the mystery, oh yeah. We’re going to solve the mystery!” ♪♫ God had blessed Daphne Beaumont with a handful of talents, singing, was definitely not one of them. The blonde danced around Casper’s living room, singing three octaves too high. Her body moved awkwardly to the piercing music that fell from her lips. It was obvious to see that the self-proclaimed investigator was thrilled with the happenings around town. Things had fallen into a boorish slumber but finally, some brave soul decided to stir the pot. “Ugh, come on, Cassie-Poo!” She nearly yelled out as she hopped up from the ground onto the hunters sofa, dirty chucks digging into the cushions. It was safe to say her home training was a little lacking. “Aren’t you dying to put the pieces together? To paint the full picture? We’re going to figure this out before the CPD can figure out that their asking the wrong question.” It wasn’t so much about whodunit but whydunit. @casperjn

As Daphne sang and danced, Casper was doing quite the opposite. While she technically was ready, in dark clothing and gear set up to a degree, she definitely didn’t feel like it. She watched the blonde jump up her sofa while she was curled up in her one-seater, head resting on one comfy arm while he legs dangled over the other. There was no doubting the energy contrast in the room.

“Daphne,” she sighed in return, propping her head up with the held of her arm, “You’re saying this as if we have anything to put us above the CPD.” Casper wasn’t eager to do most things outside of her hobbies and lazing around at home, so having to be dragged out at night by an over enthusiastic friend to actively thrust themselves straight into the middle of a mess made her deflate even more. She groaned, turning around the sofa to face the cushion part and away from Daphne. “It’s a Friday night, Daph. I was planning to stream the Overwatch League matches while cooking dinner. This wasn’t supposed to be my Friday night.”