#I'm sorry for grammar mistakes

[thesunisatangerine]

playing for keeps – chapter three

alexia putellas x barçakeeper!childhoodfriend!reader

warnings: coarse language, light angst

(a/n in the tags) [chapters: one, two, three]

word count: 8.8k

[1]

Just before you turned thirteen your body, finally, began to change. 

While Alexia’d gone ahead of you a year prior—with her limbs now lanky and sinewy, and her muscles stretched close to the newly grown bones—you were left behind. She’d grown taller, yes; not by much but the two-inch difference (two and a half, as Alexia was always inclined to remind you) felt like a foot to you. So the change was welcome when it finally started, and more importantly, it happened to coincide with something that completely altered the trajectory of your life.

During the spring after your birthday, your father got a promotion at work. To celebrate this milestone, he took you and your mother for a trip around Europe. And as a gift for your hard work and for getting into La Masia with Alexia just a few months before, your parents surprised you with tickets to at least one game in the country, or area, you were visiting. 

In Gelsenkirchen, Germany, you found your destiny. 

Or at least that was how you liked to look at it. 

Before seeing the match between Schalke 04 against Stuttgart, the idea of keeping never entered your mind; you’d played forward your whole life, and you thought that would be the position you’d play in professionally. But as you saw Manuel Neuer controlling the outcome of the game with his hands, a spark ignited within you—this overwhelming surge—and right there and then, you were enlightened to the art of keeping. That spark returned home with you and, playing into the hands of fate, your journey to keeping began.

[2]

The crescendo of the cicadas’ song was this close to lulling you to sleep. It didn’t help that Alexia’d curled herself up beside you in your bed, her head on your lap while her math notebook laid forgotten at the foot of the bed, and her eyes already closed. It was a rare occurrence for the both of you and even more so for Alexia to ‘slack off’—if you were to put it as Alexia had—but this afternoon was a particularly hot one. Summer had practically bled into spring, and even someone like Alexia clearly wasn’t immune to its soporific effect. 

The numbers from the homework you were working on began to blur when you heard a knock downstairs. Out of curiosity or just surprise, you snapped awake. And so did Alexia, apparently.

“You expecting someone?” Alexia yawned, stretching out her long limbs before settling over to her other side. The movement made a lock of hair fall to her cheek which you brushed away with the back of your finger.

“No, it’s probably Mamá’s.” You hummed in answer, relaxing down on your pillow to finally chase that nap that continued to tempt you.

But then came your mother’s voice, “Guille! Hello, my boy! How are you?”

Alexia let out a startled yelp when you jumped out of the bed, now fully awake, tripping on the rug as you rushed into the closet. 

“What the hell? What are you doing?!” Alexia hissed with annoyance but you were too busy trying to get changed to address it. 

You snatched the closest pair of shorts and jersey shirt, and began to shed the ones you had on before you slipped the fresh ones on in quick succession. 

As you did, you began to explain, “I completely forgot! I was supposed to meet up with Guille today!”

When your head popped out of your shirt, you found a deep crease between Alexia’s brows. She was sitting in the middle of your bed, cross-legged, looking very much like a disgruntled cat woken from a nap with the way her hair stuck out in odd places. 

She looked adorable. 

You bit your tongue before you could say it.

Crossing her arms, Alexia retorted, “Why? It’s Saturday.” 

The tone she used made it seem that today being a Saturday was a valid enough reason for you to not go. 

“And it is because it’s Saturday—and no training, Alexia—that I can go with him.” 

At that, her frown only seemed to deepen. You had half a mind to tease her but you knew that’d probably just piss her off even more, although if you were being honest, you didn’t understand just why this seemed to bother Alexia so much.  So instead of teasing, you tried a placating tone, “You could come with if you want?”

Alexia opened her mouth, “I—”

Your mother’s shout cut through the air. 

“Honey? Guille is here for you!” 

You sent Alexia one last apologetic glance. 

“I’m really sorry! Please stay for dinner! I’ll be quick!” 

And with a quick hug goodbye, you rushed out of your room and practically flew down the stairs. At the bottom, you found Guille leaning against the bannister, hands in his short pockets, with a small rucksack on his back who, upon seeing you, gave you a bright smile.

“Hey! You look—” He began but then suddenly, his eyes darkened and the quirk of his lips turned upside down, his tone flattening, “Oh. You’re here.”

In the same second you noticed Alexia beside you, Alexia’d slung an arm over your shoulders.

“Lovely to see you as always, Guille. And I could say the same about you.” Alexia deadpanned, flashing Guille a smile full of teeth, her eyes void of any warmth as she stared at him down her nose. Then she turned to you, her face lighting up as she asked with a little too much excitement, “So, are we going or not?”

“Wait, she’s coming with us?” Guille blurted out, but before you could even answer, Alexia left your side and ran down the steps. 

“Of course, Guille! Come on, keep up!” Alexia exclaimed on her way out of the door, tapping Guille’s stomach as she did—not without force apparently with the way Guille expelled air out harshly. 

When you got to him, you placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

“Are you okay?”

He let out a strained, “Yes.”

You gave Guille an apologetic look, grabbing your ball bag. 

“I’m really sorry for the last minute change. I’ll make it up to you.”

Still clutching his stomach, he said, “Don’t worry about it.”

The three of you got to the field near your place—which you were glad to find empty—without any more incidents. You were faced with another problem as it was only after you’d begun warming up that you realized that in your haste to leave, you forgot to bring water with you. When you told Alexia, she offered to go to the nearest corner store to buy some.

You stretched as you waited for Alexia’s return when Guille suddenly said behind you.

“Here.”

Turning, you found him holding a paper parcel bag. You considered his outstretched hand with curiosity before you met his eyes, taking the bag from him slowly. “What’s this?”

“Just a little something to get you started,” he answered, scratching the back of his head. “You said you wanted to keep, so I thought you’d need them.”

Peering into the bag, you gasped at what you found inside. 

A new pair of keeper gloves.

“Guille, you didn’t have to!”

He shrugged, smiling, “Yeah, but I wanted to anyway.”

“Thank you! Come here, you big baby!” You laughed, throwing your arms around him. Unlike Alexia, Guille was only taller than you by mere centimeters so it was relatively easy to ruffle his hair as you pulled away. 

“Mess up my hair again and I won’t teach you anything,” He threatened with a faux glare as he swept his fingers through his curling locks in an attempt to tame them. 

You rolled your eyes, grinning at him. “Okay, Antonio Banderas. So, what are the basics?”

He imitated you, rolling his eyes before he shook his head slightly, his smile never leaving his lips. Then he pointed to a spot by the goal line. “Put your gloves on and stand right there.”

You did, noting the way your new gloves fit perfectly over your hands and fingers. It felt different—stuffy—and you could already feel your palms beginning to sweat from the trapped heat. When you stood where Guille pointed, he walked around you all the while he instructed you to correct your posture: he told you keep your feet shoulder-width apart, to bend your legs slightly so that your chest was just past your knees, and to hold your palms facing out. 

“The main thing to worry about starting out is your stance. It will take time to get the balance right but once you get it down, you’re set.”

“Is this alright?” 

Guille took a step back and he gripped his chin as he hummed. After a moment of scrutiny, he nudged you back suddenly. It wasn’t quite forceful but it made you tumble down on your rear all the same. 

You smiled at him sheepishly, getting up. “I guess that’s a no?”

“Yep. It looks like you keep your weight on your heels too much.” He crouched down at your feet, drawing a square over the front half of your foot. “Keep your weight spread out around here and you should—”

Guille scrambled back suddenly, yelping as a football went flying past where he was just a second ago and into the net. Turning to the direction where the ball came from with your mouth agape, you found Alexia there with water bottles clasped to her chest, an eyebrow raised, while one corner of her mouth was set in a bemused droop, another ball rolling beneath her left foot.

“What the hell was that for, asshole?!” Guille shouted as he stormed his way over to Alexia. He was in front of her now, looking up at her with flame in his eyes but Alexia remained unfazed. She put the water bottles down before she settled her hands on her hips, cocking her head slightly to the side. 

“I’m sorry, Guille. I didn’t see you.” Alexia said flatly, “And aren’t you supposed to be playing keeper?”

“Really. You didn’t see me? Besides—”

“Ale, I asked Guille to teach me.” You huffed, running in between them and separating them with your arms before things got out of hand—again. 

This wasn’t the first time this… row between them happened. In fact, you noticed it’s been occurring more frequently lately. For all their similarities—the main one being their short tempers—the two never got on well together for reasons you never really understood and the only thread that tied them together was you. 

They weren’t always like this though; they were nice with each other the first time they’d met. Guille transferred to your school not long after you’d joined Sabadell, and if you and Alexia were inseparable there, it was always you and Guille at school. And when an opportunity arose for your two favorite persons to meet, you took it. It went well; they were friendly with each other. You only noticed things had changed after you and Guille’s school team started playing against Alexia’s so you were never sure when this all started, and by that point, the friction between them was too great to smoothen out which both saddened and disappointed you.

And it wasn’t like you never tried to get to the bottom of it. You’d asked them what happened, they both gave similar answers. By that, you meant completely avoiding answering. 

Guille’d assured you, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, we’re friends? Don’t worry.” 

While Alexia’d said with a confused frown, “What do you mean? Nothing happened.” 

And when you pestered her, asked her if the reason was because she liked Guille as a joke, she looked at you without reply, and when next practice came, she made a nuisance of herself enough to let you know the answer to your question and more. 

And here you were again, with them acting like this–always at each other’s throats. 

At your answer, Alexia looked at you, confused. “Why would you ask him to teach you how to keep?”

Your gaze lanced away as you bit your lip.

Maybe you should’ve told her after all… 

Mustering up the courage to meet her eye again, you replied, low and serious. “I want to start playing keeper, Alexia.” 

Alexia blinked, and then she crossed her arms before she eyed Guille who was scowling at her in return. She looked at you again. 

“Have you told Alejandro about this?”

“Yes.” 

“Oh.” A pause. “What did he say?”

“I’ll still start as a forward. But he said he’ll put in some extra technical sessions for me starting next week which was why I asked Guille to help me get started. Alejandro said if I get good enough, he’ll see if I can start as keeper for the team.”

An uncomfortable silence settled over you three. 

You caught Guille’s eyes darting from you to Alexia and back again from the corner of your eyes but you remained focused on Alexia’s face. At a glance, Alexia might seem calm—impassive with the way all of her features remained flat. But her eyelids drooped just so they hid more than half of her pupils, how her lower lip was slightly concealed beneath the upper one; she was pissed and even worse, she was hurt. And knowing that you’d hurt her was enough to compel you to reach out and touch her arm, apologetic.

Alexia regarded you for a moment longer. Another word of apology was on the tip of your tongue when she finally sighed, the corner of her lips tilting up to a half-smile as she spoke softly. “Okay. How can I help?”

You couldn’t help yourself. You threw your arms around her and it felt like a weight was lifted from your chest upon hearing the chuckle she let out.

The next couple of hours were spent with the three of you working together: Guille by the goal who continuously gave you notes and instructions, while Alexia—upon Guille’s signal—would send some shots to the net so you could try and stop them. The first… fifty or so shots went right past you—going easy was never exactly Alexia’s strong suit—but the more you focused on getting the timing right and reading the language of Alexia’s body to anticipate the direction of the ball, you ended the session with a few decent saves. 

It was a rough start but you were satisfied with it.

You’d left to use the restroom but upon coming back, the two of them were bickering once more.

Oh, no. What was it now?

You heard more of their words the closer you got, but you didn’t have to move too close with the way they were shouting.

“Come on, dude! Please, don’t tell me you’re still pissed off about that? It was a fair match!”

“How was that fair, Alexia? The two of you playing together is never fair! You’re both in La Masia for crying out loud! And even more importantly, she was supposed to be on my team! That was the original plan, but you went ahead and took her away!”

“What made you think I took her away?” Alexia crossed her arms, scoffing. “Let’s face it. She likes to play with me more than you.”

“You don’t know that!”

That was the moment Alexia spotted you and before you could even get a word in, she said, “Why don’t we just ask her who she’d rather play with?”

Two sets of intense eyes looked your way and without meaning to, you gulped, taking a step back.

“So? Who would you rather play with: me or her?” Guille asked, eyes wide and pleading. 

Suddenly feeling like you were backed into a corner, you stammered in your panic, “Umm, I—”

[3]

Alexia stayed over for dinner that night. That was normal; what was unusual was she left you alone to do the dishes. You had a feeling where she might be, especially since she’d been mostly quiet throughout the whole evening.

After you put away the last dish in the cupboard, and when your arms were finally free from suds, you took a peek into the living room. She wasn’t there—a confirmation of her whereabouts.

Putting on your flip flops, you headed out of the back door. 

The light from the living room casted a faint glow that dissipated the darkness around the garden when you opened the door that led out to it, aiding you just enough to see Alexia on the swing, sitting still with her back hunched forward. Once you were just a few paces behind her, you saw the contours of her headset, but even with them on, there was no way she didn’t know you were there—the fact that your shadow stretched to reach her before you did was a dead give away. Yet still, she made no move to acknowledge your presence.

Okay. That was fair.

“Ale,” you said softly. 

She gave you a glance before she went back to looking down at her clasped hands. 

“Alexia, come on.” 

Still no response. You fiddled with your thumbs as the moment dragged on. 

You sighed, sitting down on your heels next to her.

“I should’ve told you about the keeper thing,” you muttered. “I wanted to get a feel for it first, to get a bit better at it before I told you. But I didn’t consider how that would make you feel… and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for making you feel that I didn’t want or need you by my side, Alexia. I wanted you to think I was good enough for this.” 

Finally, Alexia turned to you, taking her headset off, the movement barely above a whisper. And softly, she spoke, “What made you think that I’ll think you’re not good enough for anything?”

“I don’t know.” You admitted, pulling at the grass in front of you. Your mother would probably see the hole you’d made on the lawn and berate you for it in the morning but you needed something to keep your hands busy. “I just wanted to go through this without too many expectations. And it’s not like I don’t want to keep our dynamic going. I love playing forward with you, Alexia, but I think keeping is my calling, just like midfield is to you.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I completely understand. You didn’t want any added pressure. I’m not going to hold that against you.” 

“Thank you,” you smiled at her. Then, “So, tell me why are you sulking?”

“I’m not sulking!” Alexia huffed with indignation. Then she looked away again, working her lower lip between her teeth.

You put a hand on her knee. “Alexia, what is it?”

“I…” Alexia sighed, brushing the bridge of her nose with her thumb. You gave her another moment. She heaved another breath before she began.

“That thing you said… Did you really mean it when you said you’d rather play with him than me?”

Oh. So that was what this was about.

“Of course not. We both know it’s always going to be you, Alexia.”

“Then why did you tell him that?”

“I feel like if I didn’t, I’d lose him as a friend.”

“And you’re not worried about losing me?” Alexia cried out, her tone inflected while her eyes reflected her hurt.

You blinked at her. 

There were moments—just like now—where you’d feel a sudden urge to shake Alexia. For all her sharpness and unmatched awareness, she sometimes failed to see even the most obvious of things. Couldn’t she see that you loved her and that you’d follow her to the edge of the earth if she asked you to?

At the absurdity of her question, you really couldn’t help but laugh. You stood up and shuffled behind her before you threw your arms around Alexia’s neck, draping yourself over her broad back, which made the swing move forward. The dampness of her hair felt cool against your cheek, the scent of your shampoo that clung to them filled your senses as you chuckled into her ear. 

“Why are you laughing? I’m serious!”

“Because, Alexia, do you hear yourself? I love you, you idiot!” You giggled again. “I know our friendship isn’t that shallow that I’d lose you over this. Or am I wrong?”

Alexia turned her head and you saw a hint of a smile on her lips. “No, I suppose not.”

A pleasant silence blanketed you both. And then Alexia hummed.

“But if there was something that could break us, what do you think it would be?”

You stopped to ponder, twirling a lock of Alexia’s hair with your finger, noting her hair was nearly dry now. When your mind drew blank, you replied nonchalantly, “Honestly, I have no idea.”

“Good.” Alexia leaned away so she could give you a lopsided smile—an earnest one. “Because me neither.”

[4]

“—you okay?”

You blinked and turned to Alexia. “Hmm?”

She glanced at you for a moment before she turned back to what she was doing, sleeves rolled up as she scrubbed a plate in the soapy water in the sink.

“I said, are you okay? Is there something wrong? You’ve been out of it since practice.” When a moment of silence lapsed, Alexia added, “And don’t think I didn’t notice you on your swing the past few days, too, because I did.”

You looked out the window and watched how the rain sluiced down the glass pane. In the darkness behind the window, you saw glimpses of soaked, curly locks and heard the hasty confession all over again.

You sighed, blinking the memory away.

“Guille asked me out.”

The sound of glass shattering and metal clanging made you jump, and you watched as a casserole pot twirled like a top on the hard, kitchen floor, while fragments of a broken plate skittered out to different directions. 

“Oh, shit!” Alexia cursed, looking down at the mess, while a voice called out from the living room. 

“Alexia, is everything alright in there?'' Came Eli’s voice. A few seconds later, Jaume’s head popped into the kitchen. He glanced at you then his eyes settled on Alexia who was crouched down, looking up guiltily at her father.

“Are you okay, girls?”

“Yes, Papá. I just… dropped some stuff.” Alexia said. You crouched down, too, about to pick up a fragment when Jaume spoke.

“Don’t pick that up, love, you might cut yourself. I’ll do it.” 

Jaume shooed the two of you to a corner he deemed safe and the both of you watched as he picked up the pieces, throwing them in the bin by the back door. Afterwards, he gave Alexia a kiss on her temple, and you a hug and a ruffle to your hair, as he retired for the evening, leaving the two of you again in your own company. Alexia went back to the sink to finish up whatever was left, and you returned to your place on the counter beside her. 

The silence that intruded was cut short by Alexia when she cleared her throat, “So… what did you say?” 

“I haven’t said anything, yet,” you sighed again, looking back out the window, the questions coming back full force. In the eight years you’d known Guille, how long had he harbored those feelings for you? When did it happen? What did you do to make him feel that way?

“Do you like him?” Alexia’s question brought you back to the present.

“I don’t know.”

“Do you want him?”

“Isn’t that the same thing?” You laughed slightly, glancing back at Alexia who shrugged her shoulders in answer.

“No, I don’t think so. Desire is a drive, like it makes you want to act. Attraction is just… I don’t know how to explain it, but it’s a weaker feeling. And they complement each other but they’re not the same.”

“And you know this how exactly?” You asked her teasingly, a brow raised.

Alexia averted her eyes, and shrugged your question off with a laugh.

In the moment of silence that followed, you traced Alexia’s profile, and your gaze ended at the elegant curve of the bow of her lips. She looked so pretty casted in the candescent glow of the kitchen light that it made your chest ache just by looking at her. You dropped your eyes to your feet as your mind ran faster than before this entire conversation happened.

Clutching your arms tightly across your chest, you muttered, “I don’t know what I want.” 

[5]

Maybe hoping it would all turn out fine was a bit naive because naturally, Guille didn’t take your rejection well. It was your fault really for expecting otherwise but nevertheless, the inevitable discomfort of disappointment settled like lead in your gut. 

The thing was, you were ready to give Guille the space he needed to accept your boundaries—friends, or nothing at all—and to heal. But accusing Alexia of making you turn against him? Now, that was something you couldn’t let pass. 

He knew he’d crossed a line, too, with the way he kept avoiding you. At first, the silence didn’t bother you; he was hurt, after all. But when the apology never came, you understood that you’d be going through your last year of high school without your closest friend there by your side.

A fortnight passed without any word from him so it surprised you when he showed up at the local meetup that the three of you used to go to. He refused to meet your eyes but he had no problem leveling with the glares Alexia kept giving him. And when you ended up in Alexia’s team, the only sign of his distaste about it was the way his lips flattened to a line. He looked like he was about to say something, but with a slight shake of his head, he turned around and made his way to his teammates.

With one last look at Guille’s retreating back, you tuned back in your team’s conversation.

“—doesn’t need to play keeper. We need her more in the offensive.” Alexia said evenly but when you met her eyes, there was a clear question in them. 

You gave her a slight nod to let her know you were okay. 

She nodded back.

“How will that work? She’s the better keeper.” And then Marco added, “No offense, Julia.” 

Julia only shrugged carelessly, a gesture of nonchalance.

“Julia is perfectly fine and besides, with you, Benji, and Carmen, our backline is already strong. The four of you together lessens our chance of conceding.” Alexia paused, looking over her shoulder to the other team before she faced you all again, continuing, “Our priority is the offensive. What good is a strong backline if we can’t counterattack? That’s why I’m suggesting she play as forward in the meantime, while Martina and I will play as interiors. Does that make sense?”

A collective nodding occurred.

“So just to clarify, we’re playing three–two–one?” Benji asked.

Alexia hummed, nodding her head. “Mostly. If we find the space and some opportunities, we can easily do three–one–two.”

“No pressure on us defenders, right?” Carmen said with a laugh, if not with a hint of nerve. 

Everyone laughed but at the end of it, Alexia placed a hand on Carmen’s shoulder. “No pressure because you guys, as I said, are very strong. You got this.”

Carmen smiled at Alexia at that, nodding before she finally moved to her spot. As you and Alexia moved towards the middle of the pitch, Guille was introduced to your line of sight, and a weight pressed in your gut. Disappointment? Perhaps. Or maybe you just actually missed talking and hanging out with him.

Alexia’s teasing tone pulled away your attention from Guille.  “I hope you haven’t forgotten how to play forward from all the keeping you’ve been doing.”

“Four years of keeping against the five years of playing forward? You need to brush up on your math ‘cause I think you’ve forgotten how to count.” You said dryly, giving her a look so dirty that had her throwing her head back in laughter.

Alexia leveled you with an unimpressed look but her tone remained playful. “You are such a bitch sometimes. You know that, right?”

“Thank you. I do try, you know. It’s my only defense against your smart-mouth.”

“Stop denying you don’t like my teasing.” Alexia waggled her brows as she smirked. The way she looked just then—with both hands on her hips, the ball beneath her left boot—your throat dried, heart racing; a sensation that’d familiarized itself to you during its recurrent visits over the past few weeks. Your mind blanked out, clear as the white of Alexia’s shirt, and when no words came to you to retort back, you shook your head and just laughed. By the time the game started—or maybe it was because it started—the feeling finally went away, replaced by the adrenaline that shot through your veins the moment Alexia kicked the ball to you.

It proved to be a tight game. The main strategy of the opposition seemed to be to mark and shut you and Alexia down whenever the ball so much turned your way. Alexia was right to trust your backline: any counterattack from the other team was dealt with immediately, and Julia only needed to save a handful of shots that passed through your defense, which she handled well.

At last, your team finally made a breakthrough.

Alexia cut a diagonal through the box, taking two of the defenders as she did, freeing up the space just behind her. You knew what she was doing so you faked a sidestep, turning quickly to lose your marker, before you sprinted in towards the middle of the box. And as you anticipated, Alexia sent the ball back to you with a flick of her heel. Now, if you could just—

The ground tilted, and there was a moment where the whole world suspended. It lasted for less than a breath before everything—the sensations and sounds—came rushing back in.

You slammed to the ground. 

Air was squeezed out of your lungs from the impact, while your skull and teeth rattled within the confines of your skin; the taste of green, earth, and copper spread on your tongue. Muffled shouts and grunts filtered past the ringing in your ear but when you cupped a hand over your tender ribs, your resulting groan was all you could hear.

When you finally came to, Alexia’s face was over you, the doubled image of her finally merging into one. Her wide, hazel eyes looked on you with worry and you felt the warmth of her fingers as they grazed over your face: from your temples down to your cheeks which she took in a gentle cradle.

“Alexia?” You let out another groan as you turned on your back while Alexia helped you.

“Tell me where it hurts.”

There was a tension that constricted around the front part of your head, but you could feel the blood pulsing most on the side that collided with the ground. “My head… it hurts.”

“Okay, okay. Just lay down for now, I’ll get you…”

You seemed to have passed out after that because one moment you were lying on the fields, and the next you were beside Alexia on her living room couch. You had a vague recollection of being carried on Alexia’s back, but the feel of the strong plane of her shoulder against your cheek remained there, warm and comforting. 

And only then, after Eli gave you ice for your head, did you see the bruise that bloomed deep in the skin of Alexia’s jaw, just below her left cheek, and the scuffed knuckles of her right hand which were splotched with deep reds and purples.

You took her hand onto your lap, gently running over the ice for your head over her knuckles, while you looked at Eli sitting on the opposite couch with Jaume beside her. Eli’s face burnt redder than you’d ever seen before, while Jaume held onto her hand, circling his thumb over the top of it in an attempt to calm her down.

Alexia remained quiet the whole time, eyes casted down as she took her mother’s reprimanding words. There was the unmistakable shine of shame in them, her guilt, but also an unwavering quality that stood for what she did. At the end of it, Eli and Jaume hugged the both of you before letting you retreat into Alexia’s room as you waited for your parents to arrive.

Instead of getting on her bed with you, Alexia plopped down on the floor just by the foot of the bed, her back against the wooden bedframe. You regarded the back of her head, her neck curved downwards, and you suddenly felt the need to be close to her so you shuffled off her sheets, and got down beside her. 

“Thank you, but your mother was right, you know? You shouldn’t have done it, Alexia.” You mumbled, unfurling her fingers to rest on your knee so you could access more of her knuckles that way. Gently, you placed ice over it, but she still hissed in pain. “You shouldn’t have punched him.”

“Why not? He deserved it.” Alexia said evenly as she stared at the far corner of the room. “And before you start defending him, you didn’t see what I saw—what the rest of us saw. He didn’t even touch the ball—it was all feet. He meant to trip you up.” 

Warmth bloomed in your chest at her words—at how her action showed just how much you meant to her—but the discomfort in your gut marred the surge of your affection for her. 

You took a deep breath, sighed it out, and it tasted like disappointment. 

“Alexia, I appreciate the gesture, I do. But you can’t just hurt people just because they did something to me.” 

Alexia puffed her chest and proclaimed, “I can.”

“Stop that nonsense, Alexia. I mean it.” Firmer now, you said, and there was a hint of desperation in the intonation of your words. There was an urgent need to make Alexia understand the gravity of what she did, what future implications it held if what Eli and you told her didn’t sink in now. “Actions like this can jeopardize you, Alexia, and all the things you worked hard for. Do you understand that? What will Alejandro say when he sees you all bruised up next practice? And if I get tackled dirty during a game and I get hurt, would you risk a red card, or suspension, for behaving like this?”

Alexia became silent, the muscle in her jaw working, and when she turned to you with her mouth open and you spotted a defiant crease in her brows, you were quick to stop her.

“If the answer to that question isn’t no, Ale, I don’t want to hear it.” The sound of teeth clattering filled the air. She casted her gaze aside again, her cheeks growing a shade deeper. “Look at me, Alexia.”

When she kept her eyes glued to the floor, you dropped the ice pack to take her face in your hands. She flinched from the coldness of your fingers but as you looked into her eyes, rimmed with redness and framed by drooping eyelids, you found exhaustion and the shine of apology. You brushed away a matted lock of hair from the tail end of her brow.

“You have a good heart, Alexia, but you have to promise me. Please don’t do something like this again. Ever.” 

Alexia looked into your eyes, deeply as if in contemplation, and then she closed them. A moment later, she sighed, sagging into your touch as if a weight had left her shoulders, before she opened them again. 

“I promise.” 

This time, you believed her.

Smiling softly at her, you whispered, while you placed a light kiss on her cheek. “Thank you.”

Settling into the moment, you rested your head against Alexia’s shoulder, her bruised hand in yours. In the brief silence before your father arrived to pick you up, Alexia spoke in an earnest tone that made your stomach flutter.

“I know you can handle yourself, but that won’t stop me from having your back.”

At her words, your heart felt like it would burst your chest open. And you should’ve known that this was where you’d end up—with her, it seemed inevitable anyway—because the years of you’d known Alexia flashed quickly before your eyes, and the memory stopped to this person beside you, haloed golden by the warm glow of her bedside lamp, and you were hit with a realization that took what little breath you had away.

You liked Alexia.

And, even more importantly, you want her.

[6]

When you got on the field in a Barça jersey for the first time after your return, you didn’t expect to be welcomed like you did. Jona subbed you on after the first half and as you left the tunnel, you heard the crowd chanting your name. The cheers made you feel excited, accepted and seen, but you’d be lying if you said that it didn’t pressure you at all.

It was originally intended for you to come on during the last twenty minutes, but seeing as Caro, Patri, and Alexia gave the team a comfortable enough lead, Jona decided to sub you on ahead of schedule. You didn’t see much action on your end though, something that you didn’t mind at all—a quiet defensive-third was the best kind. The midfielders kept the midline high to sustain pressure in the offensive-third, while the defenders maintained such a tight backline that any loose through-balls sent to the opposing runners were called offside. Of course, there were a handful of times when you needed to get out of your box to ping the ball back into the offensive, but other than that, it was quiet. When the match ended, you were satisfied that Barça had another clean sheet and four goals to add to the season tally.

For the celebration, you moved with your teammates around Estadi Johan Cruyff, and during the procession, you spied your parents, Eli, and Alba who was talking to a raven-haired woman you’d never seen before, clapping and cheering. Warmth filled you upon seeing your family in the stands again—such a scene was a luxury when you were in the States because plane tickets weren’t exactly cheap—and when you felt the familiar weight of Alexia’s arm slung over your shoulders, the fabric of her captain armband against the skin of your neck, it felt like a perfect homecoming.

Well, almost.

After you’d showered and changed to your casuals, most of the crowd had gone while some lounged about, one of which was the raven-haired woman Alba was talking to. When Alexia took her hand, you knew instantly, and your heart—damn your heart—dropped.

“This is Diana,” Alexia said after the both of them made their way to you. And if it wasn’t their intertwined hands that revealed what they were to each other, their gaze—saccharine when they met—made it all the more clear the nature of their relationship long before Alexia said the words, “my girlfriend.”

Diana beamed up at Alexia, her cheeks deepening in color before she regarded you again, sticking her hand out towards you to shake. Preceding the intention, you took her hand and when you did, Diana placed her other hand over yours, clasping your hand between her warm palms.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you. Alexia’s talked so much about you.” 

She did? Your eyes flitted to Alexia but when she shied away from that, you focused back on Diana’s face. She was stunning: with her high cheekbones carved to elegance, her brows following the perfect line of her temple, her full lips painted with a terracotta shade made deeper by the bronze of her skin, while her loose, straight, raven hair framed her face in such a way that accentuated the sharpness of her jaws. Her eyes were dark but still light enough to see the outline of her pupils, and they had an amiable shape that reflected her warm nature. And for some reason, her light brown eyes looked really familiar—

“Ah! My favorite cousin made it, after all! Although I’m not sure it was me you went to the game for!” Tori’s playful voice resonated in the near-barren corridor. Diana’s eyes flicked somewhere behind you—to Tori, you supposed.

“Don’t be like that, Tori, of course I came to see you, too!”

“Lies!”

Diana shook her head, laughing, as she took Tori in her arms. “Come here, you!”

In response, Tori said something in Portuguese that made Diana laugh. When they broke apart, Diana said, “Forget you? Never. Especially when I owe you one.”

“Owe her what?” Alexia asked with her brows creased with curiosity.

Diana took Alexia’s hand and squeezed it, looking up at Alexia with a gentle expression. “For giving us the chance to meet.”

“Damn right!” Tori exclaimed, putting both hands on her hips, as she grinned so wide that her dimple showed. Tori must’ve seen your confusion because she leaned in to whisper, “I brought Diana as my plus one for last year’s Ballon D’Or ceremony.”

You allowed your mouth to drop open before you smiled, letting out a small laugh that made your chest ache. “Ah, I see.”

“She kept complaining about going but now, aren’t you grateful I took you away from your precinct, Detective Beauregard?” Tori teased.

“She’s never going to let us live this down, will she?” Diana muttered dryly to Alexia but it was deliberately loud enough for all of you to hear. In response, Alexia threw her head back laughing. 

“You’re a detective? That’s amazing!” You said, impressed.

“Please, Tori’s exaggerating. I work in forensics. DNA analyst is the correct title.” Diana threw Tori a dirty look to which the other woman raised her shoulders in response. “It’s a whole different world compared to yours so—and please don’t let this get to your head, Tori—I am grateful I was able to step into it.”

Her eyes, still locked with Alexia’s, grew all the more soft.

“Get a room, you guys,” Tori said with a mock sound of disgust, and then she continued to mutter, “And to think that you’ve only been going out for four months… I don’t even want to think about how it will be like in another three months.”

At that, Alexia raised a brow and then, “Want to do some extra laps tomorrow?”

You and Tori knew Alexia was joking, but Tori being Tori, she spluttered, “That would be a hard no, Captain. I’ll just—Have a great night!” 

With that, she ran away, arms flailing behind her in an exaggerated manner as she hastily made her exit. The sight drew laughter from the three of you.

“We’re having dinner at Mamá’s, want to come over?” Alexia asked.

You shook your head, flashing a look at Diana, before you told Alexia,“Not tonight. I’m just about to head over to my parents’ as well.”

“Alright. But Alba’s going to ask about you, you know? I think she wants to hang  out with you.”

You laughed. “Tell her to text me. She’ll know what that means.”

“Is that something I should know about?” Alexia smirked.

Flatly, you retorted, “If it’s something that concerns you, I’d be telling you by now, right?” 

“You see what I have to deal with?” Alexia told Diana, almost whining.

Inching backwards, you said as dry as you could manage, “I’ll take that as my queue to leave, Alexia might start crying. She’s a crybaby, you know?” 

“Hey! I’m not—”

“No need to be embarrassed about it, Alexia. Be proud!”

Diana only laughed, saying, “Alright, kids, I think that’s enough for tonight.”

Nodding, you grinned at Alexia while she mouthed the word ‘bitch’ to you. In kind, you mouthed ‘smartmouth’ back. With a shake of her head and a smile, she gave you one last hug, and after a pleasant goodnight from Diana, the three of you parted ways.

You sent them a look over your shoulder, catching a glimpse of the watch around Alexia’s left wrist. It glinted as they walked together down the corridor, hand in hand, looking as in love as any new couple would. 

The sight made you smile, but it felt heavy, and as if the universe wanted to rub salt to the wound, you found Patri outside the locker room when you turned around with a look akin to pity in her eyes.

[7]

The next day, Guille stopped by at your place. He’d given you notice a few days prior but even still, the moment you saw him behind the door, you squealed like you were ten again from your excitement. After you hugged him tight—he made a choking noise when you did to tease you—you held him at arm’s length to see what changes the last few months had done to him.

He looked different. Gone were the long, dark curls; now sheared close to his scalp that left only about an inch of length, his hair retained their luscious shine, their color still as dark as night. 

His scar—the one just by the tail end of his left brow—that used to see little light from the obstruction of his hair, now stood apparent and without meaning to, the day he got it came back to you: the bruised knuckles, ice-cold fingers, and the warm blush of a lamplight.

 And your chest ached a little.

Leading the conversation to the living room, the two of you ended up ordering takeaways—mostly for Guille’s benefit because you weren’t about to subject him to your football diet—and as you ate, the two of you caught up.

Guille was close to finishing his dissertation—the biomechanics of concussion in sport and its neurocognitive implications—and he was both excited and fearful about what would come next. He then talked about his girlfriend, Iris, smittenly if you might add. She was actually with him in the city, but his mother insisted she steal Iris for the day for some quality bonding, and you laughed at the repertoire of stories he’d relayed in great detail about his mother’s teasing of their relationship.

“When am I going to meet Iris?” You asked with a teasing tone.

He rolled his eyes, “Well, since you’re actually staying in Barcelona this time, we can arrange that.”

A pause, and then, “Is Alexia staying here, too, or are you here by yourself?”

“No, it’s just me here.”

“Oh. I thought the two of you’d be rooming again like—” Probably seeing your change in demeanor, Guille cleared his throat as he ate his pasta a bit too eagerly. “Speaking of, how is she?”

The question was casual but you knew it was anything but.

“She’s doing good, if not a little stressed. Our first Champions League game is just around the corner after all and it’s against Chelsea, so.” You shrugged to complete your thought. You knew what he was asking but you’d rather not talk about that.

His eyes could burn a hole on the side of your head by the way he stared at you in the silence that followed. Then he sighed deeply.

“She still doesn’t know.”

Tension filled every inch of your body and you shrank tight as a coiled spring. You stood up as you felt a sudden urge to get away from him, taking the used plates on the coffee table as a pretense to move from the couch to the sink.

“What’s it to you if she doesn’t know, Guille?” You asked flatly, rolling up your sleeves after you turned the tap on.

“I just want you to be happy. Is that so wrong?”

“And who says I’m not?” Your tone was flat and when you glanced at him over your shoulder, Guille only gave you a pointed look.

Then he said softly, “She could make you happier and you know it.”

And there it was again, that look in his eyes that you just couldn’t stand. Gritting your teeth, you gripped the edge of the sink and your voice quaked when you spoke. “Please stop talking like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like,” you tried to find the words but when they evaded you, you huffed and threw your hands up in the air. “Why are you making it sound like I have a chance?”

“Because you do! You’re the one who’s not giving Alexia a chance by not telling her.”

“Give me one good reason why I should.”

“She loves you.”

A pause.

“That’s bullshit.” You shook your head, letting out a small, disbelieving laugh. As much as your heart wanted that to be true, you knew otherwise.

“It’s really fucking not.” Guille countered.

“If she did, she wouldn’t have said what she did.” 

“People say stupid shit when they’re drunk.”

“That can go the other way, too. Alcohol has a way of loosening what’s been bottled.”

“Oh, come on!” Guille scoffed. “You’ve known her since you were eight. You’ve been through thick and thin together! Do you really think she wanted you to leave?”

With the reminder, the memory sprung up on you and you could hear Alexia’s voice, grating and wrenching your heart raw again when you heard the words from her lips. You whirled around to face him, eyes burning.

“You weren’t there when she told me, Guille!” You breathed out sharply and then you continued, in a lower tone filled with resignation, you whispered as you buried your face in your palms. “You didn’t hear the way she said it. You didn’t—”

You choked on your words. 

After all this time, it was still too painful.

Darkness filled your vision but the tears escaped nonetheless, branding tracks down your cheeks. You heard the rustling of clothes followed by soft footsteps. Before you knew it, Guille’s arms wrapped around your shoulders and his familiar, comforting scent made you sink into the embrace.

“You’re right. I wasn’t there. But if you could forgive me for being an asshole and what I did to you, why can’t you do the same with her?”

You didn’t say anything after that, only clutched at his shirt a little tighter.

Guille kept quiet, too.

The both of you knew just the reason why.

[8]

“Did you see the news?” Jona asked as he kept the door open for you to an empty meeting room, closing it as soon as you’d gone in. 

Sitting down on one of the cushioned chairs, you said, “I did.”

You saw it this morning and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t faze you. 

Jona nodded, taking the chair across the table from you. He put his clasped hands on the wooden surface and the way he tapped an erratic rhythm with his thumbs didn’t help your nerves.

“Lyon paid a hefty transfer fee for her and that makes me worried. I don’t know what Bompastor is planning to do with her but her transfer to the European league will be a concern for the club.” With a pensive crease appearing between his brows, he continued. “You probably know why I asked you to come in.”

“You want me to tell you what I know about her.”

He nodded, leaning forward as if to emphasize his point. “She’s a lethal forward and you’re the only one in the club who’s ever played with her. In fact, you two seemed very close during your time in Angel City.”

You crossed your arms, leaning back into your chair, frowning slightly. “I don’t know what you’re trying to say.”

Jona blinked at you.

Then slowly, “Surely you must’ve trained closely together considering she’s a forward and you’re a keeper? Unless training was vastly different in Angel City, then I’m sorry for the assumption.”

“O–Oh, I thought you were implying—” You shook your head, uncrossing your arms as you waved the rest of your sentence away. “Never mind. But yes, that’s right.”

Jona gave you another questioning look before speaking again. 

“She’s going to be a big problem. And that’s why I’m going to change things up a bit. I want to put you in the starting lineup as soon as possible—put as many games with our current team under your belt. We’ll most likely face Lyon in the Quarters and that’s unfortunate but what is great is that you’re here: the best counter to what Lyon acquired. If we could eliminate Lyon early, we have a higher chance of winning this year’s Champions League. The question is, are you ready for it?”

“That’s what I’m here for, Jona.” You said seriously, ignoring the pressure that pressed in the periphery of your mind.

“Use me.”

#ap11 #alexia putellas #alexia putellas x reader #woso x reader #my writing #a/n: i'm just gonna drop this here lol #im really sorry for the very very very late update #had no time lately and after losing the first draft for this (8k words down the drain) my motivation kind of just fell off the cliff #but ive been rewriting this on the go for the past month or so so please forgive me for more grammar and spelling mistakes than usual #also im kinda jetlagged and sick atm so im planning to get to your messages as soon as i get my bearings back <3 #i hope youre all doing well and thank you for reading <3

[lynaferns]

Hi, hello. Did you say big bat vampire dca au? As in, they’re big bats? 👀

That sounds really cool!

Yeah, although I don't have a clear image of them yet.

I made a doodle of the three half(?) transformed

They are mixed species but each resemble one more than the others. (I messed up eclipses ears, drew the wrong shape)

(whoops little ramble about bats)

Sun is an Indian Flying Fox, a fructivore bat. They are one of the bigguest (1 to 2 ft tall and 4ft wingspan (great for hugs/j)) and helps with the forest pollinization. They can fly 40km in one night. They lack echolocation but has a better eyesight than other bats. It's endangered due to humans haunting them for their meat.

Moon it's a Common Vampire bat (and a bit of White Winged bat for the colors), they eat mammal blood. There are 3 vampire species: the common, White-winged and Hairy-legged, the common can eat blood from any mammal while the other two eat mainly from birds and humans. The common vampire is a good crawler, so they'll prefer to get close to their prey from the ground. The white-winged has these glands in its mouth that uses to spit a really nauseating smell when its being molested (like skunks but these spit on you), there is sulfur in the spit.

Eclipse has the more clear mixes to see and it's the smallest of the three, its a Welwitch bat (it has freckles!!), a big eared and has part of canyon bat (because of the colors too). It's insectivorous, they help with plagues. They pretty much just vibe, just leave them be eating half their weigh in bugs and both of you'll be happy.

Nor the vampire or fruit bat has tails.

And they all can give you

Rabiessssss ✨

I didn't look into every especie there is of bats, first of because there are like 1,000, most of them insetivorous, and second because there is varely any info about any especie that aren't the common ones.

#ask #doodle #long post #sorry for any typo or grammar mistake #I'm still a little dizzy after spending hours yesterday loking at all the info I could get about bats #and getting the correct images is a hell because you type the correct name and 90% are other random species #fnaf dca #fnaf moon #fnaf sun #fnaf eclipse #dca au

[momentomori24]

Shadow, despite hating Nine with a passion, is the only person in this entire show that actually sees and understands him in any meaningful way. Sonic's attachment to Nine is based off his friendship with Tails and his inability to cope with the fact that his best friend is gone. In his eyes, Nine is just a gloomy, edgy version of Tails, not his own person with his own motives and desires. He's so used to him and Tails being on the same page, always having each other's back, that he didn't even bother to consider the fact that Nine and him would be any different, and his lapse in judgement is what lead to Ghost Hill being destroyed in the aftermath of Nine's betrayal.

Shadow repeats the sentiment ''they're not your real friends'' over and over in the show. Not only does he offer Sonic a mental out, a way to compartmentalize and stick to their priorities without any regrets weighing him down, it also rings very true to every character Sonic has met thus far. Rebel isn't Rouge, Renegade isn't Knuckles, Thorn isn't Amy and Nine isn't Tails. They're only pieces of their original's personality formed and twisted into their own people with their own lives and their own names. They're similar, but distinctly different, complete strangers in all but appearance. Sonic undoubtably cares about Nine and the others, but that care is built on an illusion, and Shadow recognized that immediately. And for me that's the most ironic and sensible part of it all. That it's Shadow of all people recognizing that so quickly. Shadow, the guy with a history of identity issues plagueing his legacy. Shadow, the guy who cares the least about these other people and made Sonic eat dirt for an entire episode just to sacrifice them one season ago.

And it makes sense. Because he knows first hand how difficult it is to seperate the past from the present, walking the line between being a protector and being a destroyer, his own person or just a weapon and existing as an entity for others to project on until he finally figured himself out on his own, he's able to sniff out Nine's confusion and resentment of Tails from his line ''This is the friend Sonic thought was like me? We're nothing alike'' when they encountered his ghost form before Sonic ever did. And because he doesn't care for him, he never associates him with Tails, giving him the ability to see Nine for who he really is. And Nine's troubled, selfish and volatile, and not to be trusted because his goals never aligned with theirs. He's everything Tails isn't, and that's why Sonic never acknowledged those traits. But Shadow sees Nine, and that's why he was so quick to distrust him.

It's also why he could easily deduce what the motive behind his actions were. Power. It's a motive he can certainly relate to. Something he can understand, but Sonic cannot (bless his heart). It was his driving force for the entirety of SA2. What he was after was the power of the Chaos Emeralds to inact Professor Gerald's revenge on the planet and was he believed to be Maria's dying wish, just like how Nine searches for power to create a paradise where he can live the life he always wanted surrounded by ''friends'' he never had. Both of them didn't think about the damage they caused or those they betrayed in that pursuit because they never factored into the equation in the first place. It's about power to achieve self-fulfilment, and what a broken, lonely, destructive and misguided guy seen by nobody and isolated by everybody will do to see it all through to the end.

Nine and Shadow can relate to each other. They can understand each other. They're can be on the same page when it comes to figuring out what the other person is plotting from eye contact alone (like Shadow immediately realising that Nine was going to use Sonic as his energy source). What Shadow wants from Sonic is to be heard, and what Nine wanted from Sonic was to be seen, and what they can't recieve from him they can give to each other. They're similar, they're compatible, they're both attached to Sonic despite acting otherwise and their mindsets are identical-- and that's exactly why they will never be friends.

#sonic prime #sonic prime spoilers #i find shadow and nine's rivalry really neat if that wasn't obvious already #i'm a sucker for characters so similar they're fated to clash and they fit the bill so well it's nuts #shadow acknowledges nine as his own person which is what nine always wanted out of sonic #but because he does unlike sonic he doesn't trust nine further than he can throw him. so nine is stuck regardless #idk i just wanted to rant about these guys real quick hope this post makes sense #nine sonic prime #shadow the hedgehog #sorry for any grammar mistakes!

[nattikay]

psa for all avatar fanfic writers who feel the need to use Na’vi terms in their fics:

“ma” does not mean “my”

I know it’s tempting to think of it that way because it sounds similar, but it doesn’t. It’s a particle used when addressing someone directly. Think of it like a verbal @ sign. You use it when you’re talking to someone, never when you’re talking about someone.

✅ You should fix the basket, ma ‘itan. ❌ You should help ma ‘itan fix the basket.

✅ Ma Neytiri, did you go hunting earlier? ❌ I heard that ma Neytiri went hunting earlier.

Ma ‘ite = @ daughter, not “my daughter” Ma ‘itan = @ son, not “my son” Ma yawne = @ beloved, not “my beloved” 

With ‘ite and ‘itan specifically I sometimes see it smushed into one word (ma’ite/ma’itan)--this is also incorrect. Even more so is using the tìftang as a connector between ma and whatever name or term you’re using (ma’yawne, ma’Jake, etc), which I’ve also seen once or twice. Tìftang is just a normal part of the words ‘ite and ‘itan; it has nothing to do with the “ma”.

furia aynga zola’u ne TedTalk oeyä, irayo  thank u for coming to my Ted Talk

#avatar #avatar 2 #way of water #lì'fya leNa'vi #i'm sorry to be that person i knoooow it's unfair to expect the average fic author to go out of their way to study Na'vi grammar #just for a fic #buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut it is still rather distracting ^^; #i've seen all sorts of other...um...interesting na'vi mistakes as well but this is a particularly common and easy to correct one #so #now you know :P

[tero-ga]

Hey everyone, I'm back again with another TGAA Swap AU design art with Tobias Gregson taking Gina's role! He is in same age as Gina (17-18 years old) so I want to show that in his design as well not removing much of his original self.

Andd I also reanimated one of the scene in the game it self because, why not? I have a lot of motivation this past few week for some reason hdhsha. Anyway I hope you're liked it!

Here's the art concept for the designs!

#tgaa #dgs #dgs spoilers #tgaa spoilers #the great ace attorney #dai gyatuken saiban #swap au #tobias gregson #iris wilson #iris watson #herlock sholmes #sherlock holmes #sorry if there's is a grammar mistake in the video. English is my second language and i'm not really good at it #fun fact: Sunny would not use any nickname for people except for Albert (he called him Grimsy) #another fun fact: instead of using 'dear fellows'. Jane would use like 'my darlings' or 'my dear' for Sunny only

[heeliopheelia]

I need a little hc about aftercare w/ enha hyung line coz they all seem to be mean in these smut stories ☹️

OMG OFC BABY!! 😚

So starting off with HEESEUNG:

-i'm sorry but this bitch would be so exhausted afterwards, he'd most likely fall asleep if not for you shaking him awake and telling him that you both could use some shower

-that kinda wakes him up and soon the two of you would be in the bathroom, lazily washing each other up

-pls he'd love to use his soap and shampoo on you bcs you smelling like him is so hot to him for whatever reason

-he'd throw one of his t-shirts over you and then swoop you up from the floor, carry you to the bedroom and cuddle the shit out of you until the both of you were asleep

I deeply belive that JAY is the king of aftercare:

-i'm talking preparing you a bath, carrying you in there and then drying you and dressing you up kinda stuff

-cause you're his lil princess after all right? how tf else is he supposed to treat you if not like the most cherished and precious thing in the entire world?

-would literally drown you in kisses and soft words as he'd caress your body with your favorite loofa

-would do everything you ask him for - food? done. cuddles? done. movie? done. whatever you want - it's yours

JAKE is such sweet baby but:

-i feel like he gets so talkative after nearly breaking his s/o's back LMFAO

-like you would be laying on his chest and he would be chatting your damn ear off, hands stroking your hair until he notices you're not responding to him at all and you actually fell asleep on him

-he'd coo at you for a second (would 100% snap a pic of you) before gently pulling you off of him so that he could clean you up quietly

-he'd quickly go to the bathroom to grab some towel and dampen it with warm water, then come back and wipe you clean while trying his best not to wake you up

And lastly we got SUNGHOON:

- his aftercare i feel like would be the simplest one but still sweet nonetheless ☝️

-he'd feel so bad after seeing how much he's tired you out pls

-he'd wipe you up with the first better thing that stumbles upon his hands - which happened to be some of your make up wipes but well as long as it works what's the difference, right? ://

-no he'd be sweet don't get me wrong, he's trying i promise 😭 he'd kiss and cuddle the hell out of you afterwards

-probably has some cookies stacked in his nightstand just for you <33

#guys i've finally learnt how to do gradient lmao #gonna MILK this shit now so pls bear with em #*me sorry i'm just excited lmao #ALSO sorry it took me couple days babe #carly answers ✎ #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen jay #enhypen heeseung #enhypen jake #jake sim x reader #lee heeseung x reader #park jay x reader #park sunghoon x reader #enhypen headcanons #enhypen hard hours #ALSO SORRY IF THERE ANY GRAMMAR MISTAKES BUT I'M SO DISTRACTED RN SINCE I'M IN A TRAIN LMAO

[polvsketchbook]

"count to three" ch 1 - p 1/8

page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

#midpollo #apollo #midnighter #andrew pulaski #lucas trent #my art #fanart #fancomic #I was so stressed posting it skksksks #I'm already sorry for grammar mistakes #don't expect too ambitious plot please #count to three

[hyperactivewhore]

quick thoughts that I have at mind in night: it makes me fucking mad how the writers handled Marcel and Klaus relationship.

Klaus was practically his father, and both Marcel and Klaus (and even Elijah) said a thousands of times they saw each other as father and son, because that's what they are.

But yet they practically were at each others throat 24/7. The Mikaelson (my baby girls all of them, except Mikael and Esther, they can rot) treated him like some outsider but welcomed Hayley (also my baby girl) with open arms.

(Not exactly tho, but you get my point. I could go on a whole speech about how the Mikaelson only see people they share blood with as family)

And I completely adore Hope, but why was she more important to Klaus than Marcel??? It's pushing the whole "bio kid is more important and loved that the adopted one" down our throats.

Also, I'm so mad they didn’t even get a goodbye scene in season 5. Fucking Caroline, his one night stand did, but not his own son?

I'm aware it's all fault of Julie Pl*c disgusting racist ass, but oh well.

#klaus mikaelson #marcel gerard #the originals #the vampire diaries #elijah mikaelson #hope mikaelson #hayley marshall #mikael mikaelson #esther mikaelson #anti caroline forbes #not really anti but i don't like her so #this is probably hard to read #i'm spanish and i was typing really hard as i waited for character ai to load so sorry for the grammar mistakes 🤭

[heartsgettingwiser62]

The show expresses El's and Will's main arc and desires through their art in s4.

On the one hand, we have Will, who creates a painting for Mike that portrays them and the party together again, as their dnd characters. Of course, it displays Will's desire of belonging again in that friend group, of having what was taken away from him last summer. But, after all, the main focus of the painting is Mike. Because 1, the painting is for Mike after all, and 2, Will himself is telling where his priorities are, by painting a heart on top of him. Mike's the heart, his heart.

On the other hand, with her art (the figures she makes), El portrays Hopper and his cabin, the first place she actually considered a home. This creation is, in a way, for Hopper. Since she obviously can't give it to him directly, it's a tribute to his sacrifice, therefore, it's made for him. That's where her priorities lie: family.

Will's arc, his biggest hopes and desires, are primarily about love, just how he expresses in his art. El's arc, her biggest hopes and desires, are primarily about family, just how she expresses in her art.

So, narratively, who would make more sense to end up in a relationship? The one whose focus is love and belonging (being who he loves one of the reasons he feels as if he doesn't belong) or the one whose focus is family and finding herself?

#sorry if this has grammar mistakes i'm not native and for some reason i forgot how to speak english today 😭😭 #idk i'm tired man #anyways 'will's arc is about accepting mike doesn't love him back ' HE ALREADY KNOWS (more like thinks) THAT #his arc is about learning that he can be loved the way he wants to bc there's nothing wrong with him or the way he wants to be loved #and el's arc is definitely not about romantic love is about finding a family and finding herself #and guess what THE ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP SHE'S IN DOESN'T LET HER FIND HERSELF #literally stablished in s3 #'there's more to life than stupid boys' max mayfield the wisest woman on earth #like IT'S SO OBVIOUS SKDNSKD #idk i'm feeling a bit angry today at how ppl can't read tv shows and plotlines #byler #will byers #mike wheeler #stranger things #mike wheeler i know what you are #anti milkvan #anti mileven #el hopper #byler proof #byler is requited #byler is canon #byler endgame #byler theory #willel #gay mike wheeler #milkvan is bones

[wrylu]

hihi<3

silly thoughts below!!!!

sometimes i feel like soap would be a piece of cheese. like. in some way. i think he would be good as a whole like wheel of cheese. *grates him with a cheese grater*

i cannot get this thought out of my mind— king would totally get on his knees and literallu worship queen. holding up her crown with a pillow (which she obviously deserves one). trembling out of honor & "yes ma'am" "as you wish" (@/liamthemailman's ocs are corrupting me.)

chin scratches & price. that's it i'm not giving you anything else.

no because jack is sooooo :3 ?? but i feel like they would bite my ankles off. chew them. rip my skin off and swallow it but like affectionately & aggressively yeah?

soap uses online shopping as therapy. fuck it , he uses all types of shopping as therapy. you've probably seen him in the slipper section of an old navy but never noticed it. it never works btw & he now he has an unintentional fluffy slipper collection

ghost rides carousels at carnivals or whatever but only when he goes out alone

this is such a turn from the other rambles i just typed but idk why i feel like gaz would eat a lightbulb. that sounds like such a soap thing but imagine his torso lighting up when he swallows it. that's just so gaz to me??? (vincent is concerned (he eats crayons (blue ones)))

price plays stardew valley secretly and loves the chickens (he would kill for them)

for some reason i picture ghost wearing a snorkeler every time he goes like to swim or something. it doesn't even matter what body of water it (when this first thought came to mind i thought of him in a 3 foot long pond for frogs and his snorkeler just peeking out of the top LMAO. also i know this isn't swimming but when it's raining i imagined him wearing it there too and i laughed aloud.)

soap tried a (any%) speedrun once and his pb is 3 hours 27 minutes 54 seconds and 8 milliseconds

okay goodnight it's past my bedtime i might return with more silly thoughts tomorrow... or like once in a blue moon i dunno.

i love you, have a good week 💐💗

#sorry for any spelling mistakes or grammar mistakes or if i repeat something or . i hate english #nobody was harmed in the making of this text post #do these count as headcanons? ahaha #guys stop looking at me like that shhh... i know I KNOW i'm a freaking art blog calm down okay #wrylu #shittea posts #ramblings #rambles #HoC #cod #call of duty #mw #soap mactavish #john price #simon riley #kyle garrick

[mialicassi]

headcannon that when ast was pregnant for zephyr hiccup was so excited and nervous that he hardly could sleep, so he just, talked with zephyr still in the belly. For hours and hours ab literally everything, like, how was his day, what he did as a chief that day or week, how he loved his wife, how he missed toothless, ideas for future projects, literally EVERYTHING and with details. and every time he talked to zeph he calmed down enough to fall in a completely peaceful sleep without even finishing his own sentences.

all while astrid was sleeping. and she never really had a chance to see the moment because she was always asleep, (i also headcannon that she was pretty sleepy during zeph's pregnancy) until one day she ended up waking during one conversation and found it just so freaking cute that she decided to pretend to be asleep to hear it, and i'm absolutely sure she just fell in love with him all again at the moment

#I'm pretty sure there are some grammar mistakes in this text #and i'm sorry #again #hiccstrid #dadcup #dadccup #momstrid #haddock family #zephyr haddock #astrid and hiccup #married hiccstrid #pregstrid #hiccup being a ray of sunshine as always #i love them so much

[frogkingtheorginal]

#my art #design #asoiaf #house tully #catelyn stark #lysa arryn #edmure tully #brynden tully #roslin frey #hoster tully #Sorry Cat but your home coat of arms reminds me just of one thing- #a logo of the only good fish shop in my area always my Dad buys trout from #(ps I love trout) #I'm looking at it it's really the only thing I can think about XD #Even more so the one coat of arms you can found on 'The Wiki of Ice and Fire' #then the one from 'Fandom' that I have taken my reference from #( ps. I see some terrible grammar mistakes here- but I'm working from my phone-so I can't really alter them) #(and It draws me mad 😡😭)

[wenellyb]

Unorganized thoughts about the Kate/Edwina/Anthony storyline in Bridgerton

I'm going to say something weird but I think that what happened with Edwina in the 2nd Season of Bridgerton is what happened to Jacob in Twilight. The writers loved the "side character" so much that they decided to give them more space in the story but chose to do so by making a love triangle with the main characters and then dragging it for too long.

The way Kate and Anthony's "love story" started was surprising because it focused a lot on Anthony courting Edwina and at the moment when the love triangle storyline should have stopped and made it clear that "Kate was the one", the show went with a proposal from Anthony to Edwina.

If it weren't for the book, a lot of people wouldn't even have realized that Kate and Anthony were supposed to be endgame after that proposal scene. I know I had my doubts about who the endgame couple would be because I couldn't believe that they would go through with the wedding with another woman, in a romance. Especially if that woman is the MC's sister.

Marriage of convienience and slow burns are very common in romances . Anthony's lack of feelings for Edwina doesn't mean that Edwina and Anthony's story wasn't possible, so it wasn't inimaginable to think of them as the main couple. Queen Charlotte and King George storyline also started out like that.

All the codes used in Bridgerton Season, made out Edwina to be the main character, Kate only became the main character in the last 2 episodes.

Edwina got the Big dramatic proposal, with Anthony shocking everyone by declaring his love in front of everyone. It reminded me of another scene from a Shonda Rhimes show. I even made a post about it:

Edwina got her Big wedding ceremony, sponsored by the Queen.

Anthony wasn't even the one who stopped the wedding, Edwina was. Anthony wanted to keep the wedding going. Edwina got to do her Big speech and she was the one who was brave enough to face the Queen and stop the wedding.

We only saw Anthony being horny for Kate, nothing about him screamed main character in those scenes.

And to have Anthony and Kate hook up on the day of Edwina wedding to Anthony...So tacky. Not very romance novel like.

I think the show would have been better if they had sticked to the storyline from the book, from what I've heard, there was no love triangle and Edwina was rooting for Kate and Anthony.

The truth is: Edwina & Anthony's relationship followed the classic romance steps, courting proposal, wedding but Kate & Anthony's didn't.

As much as I love Kate, if they really wanted to sell Kanthony as Endgame from the start, they should have ditched the emotional cheating and the love triangle with her own sister, and made her the main character.

We didn't even get a Kate and Anthony wedding scene....

#as always this is only my opinion and I'm more than open to discussions #edwina sharma #kate sharma #kanthony #bridgerton #queen charlotte #sorry for the grammar mistakes

[anotherfandomtrash]

SIX the musical but it’s Kuragins messing everything up as ghosts

#my art #animatic #war and peace #wap ghost au #helene kuragina #helene bezukhova #lise bolkonskaya #anatole kuragin #petya rostov #andrei bolkonsky #andrey bolkonsky #YAY iT'S HERE #I'VE FINALLY FINISHED IT #the first part of animatic was made a long time ago when I had more time #that's why it's looks better #but like I'm still proud #and I've missed doing animatics #it's hard and tiring but when you finish them it's a delight #anyway have a good day #also sorry for any grammar mistakes i'm just sleep deprived

[wistfulstarling]

Devils Night By Penelope Douglas

My thoughts on the devils night series

Trigger warnings: All tws from DN series, sa mention, grooming mention, this is not a positive post. Note: Credits to @pro-logue-epi-logue for giving me the motivation to write this (girl I was about to write a whole essay in your comments) this is the first and last time I talk about this series because I swear it gives me a headache. Also, i think there might be too many heart emotes here (╥‸╥)

So, i read the DN series a while back (all the damon-winter content had me hooked and they, at least, did not disappiont but more on that later). This series was not what i expected for one, and for two i literally did not expect it to be a series at all. My opinion is probably biased based on my liked and disliked characters, if you disagree, scroll.

I'm dividing this into two different sections, the books and the characters because as a writer myself, (and someone who has analyze and review books thoroughly as her 2024 goal) i think the two deserve to be viewed separately as much as they do together. This is by no means meant to hate PD this is again just my personal thoughts on the series.

Also, I read this series some time ago, so my memory isn't very fresh. Feel free to correct me (gently).

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ THE BOOKS ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

ღ Corrupt [Erika Fane and Micheal Crist]

‪‪❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬⁠♡♡

Three stars for the first book in the series. Why? Well, to be honest, it was boring.

I think, while the book was boring, it held potential. Everything was setup nicely, and I feel like everything went just downhill from here.

Rika, at least in this book, was an okay character to me. She was a lost girl (understandably so), she wanted to live a little, get into trouble (like every highschooler in a piece of media not written by a highschooler). Even her obsession with Micheal was understandable. The plot was nice, it was mysterious, kept me hooked and didn't bore me (too much). The pace was a bit slow for my taste but by the end of the book i knew why it was slow and i enjoyed it.

The writing left a bit to be desired, but i think that that's just a me problem. I like a very certain kind of writing style which involvles a lot of deep thought from the characters and a lot of internal monologues (this style gets executed flawlessly by Trisha Wolfe, in my opinion) but I understand that characters from devil's night (at least Rika and Micheal) aren't people who'd have that kind of thought process.

Overall the book set a pretty good stage for the rest of the story to unfold. Rika felt relatable, Micheal was okay (a little dumb but he's not the brains of the group) unless of course we mention the grooming but we'll do that at a later time.

My only complain was that, in the begining the book felt very confusing but again, that might've just been me. I loved the aesthetic the story was promising and the atmosphere built by the story telling was mesmerising and immersive.

ღ Hideaway (Kai Mori and MOTHER Nikova Banks)

❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬⁠♡♡

Banks carried the book on her back, I said what I said and I will not be taking it back.

Anyway, so three for this book too because this book had potential but it was ruined by PD's favoritism for Erika. Listen, I understand self insert characters and even I have some in my stories and I love them more than life itself but I don't think Penelope accomplished what she wanted by shoving Rika down everone's throats.

The writing and pacing was all over the place. Rika was in scenes that had nothing to do with her and overall i think PD jumped too fast to some scenes and took way too long for some others.

The book would've been so much better if PD's editors or beta readers would've helped with the pacing. As an author myself, i understand how hard it is to not include your favriote baes in everything but that's why we have editors. So, this one I'm not holding onto to PD enitrely. (Despite the injustice Banks was done.)

ღ Kill-Switch (Damon Torrance and Winter Ashby)

❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬⁠♡♡

Boring ahh, virtually no plot whatsoever, my girl winter was done so dirty and overshadowed by Erika and Damon throught the entire of the book. #SoftWomenCanBeJustAsBadassAsTheCunningOnes.

This, ugh, I can't figure out if i want to put this in the books or characters. But god help me, the idea of feminism is flawed asf with this book is not great. Now, I don't know whether that idea came from PD or the fandom, but characters like Winter and Emory are constantly overshadowed by either 1. The men in their lives or 2. The other "badass" female characters (Alex and Rika, I'm so pissed because I wish I could add Banks here but my girl barely gets any screentime)

Overall, it was just Damon and Winter's love story before getting into the finally book. Not too much to say about it. I already said what I had to about the actual main character being overshadowed by Rika who, surprise, is not supposed to be the FMC of this particular book.

ღ Nightfall (Will Grayson and Emory Scott)

Warning: My opinion is going to be biased asf here because I'm someone who suffered physical abuse as a child.

❤︎‬‪‪❤︎‬‪‪♡♡♡

One star because in this book there was only 1 star, that was the star of the show, Emmy.

I'm kidding. Two stars because, yeah. This book held a lot of potential but I think either PD just doesn't work well with series or she was rushed to do this because all the potentiometer went into a fiery drain.

Actually most of everything was okay. PD could've solved the plot very easily by making Will's plan succeed but the moment Alex popped out of her little hiding spot, I cringed. So hard. (Cue me trying to keep my emotions in check while writing this)

This wasn't Alex's book and she shouldn't have been there. And I felt so SO bad for Emory throughout the entire book. I liked past Will but present Will irked me to no extent. It's like PD saw the vision of the character arc of "sunshine gone dark" but she kind of missed.

As someone who suffered emotional and physical abuse, this book was slightly triggering (grrh, Alex) but overall two stars.

One for not messing up Emmy's character and two for building good character relationships with Emmy and her two sidekicks in the story. (I forgot their name I'm sorry, Rory and Micah? Or something similar?)

The plot, the pacing, the resolving. Everything left me wanting more. It just wasn't right.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ THE CHARACTERS ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Going to try and summarise my thoughts on them with as little words as possible so I don't ramble

ღ Erika (3/5)

She was understandable at first, she could've been a great example of someone who's kind, empathetic but still can be strict when necessary but the writing of the books failed her. I can understand why she turned the way she did at the end of her arc (Micheal literally groomed her and felt insecure when he couldn't control her anymore) but I think she's a strong character despite being annoying most of the time. I like that she looked out for the girls (a little bit, before the writing failed her and she turned into a pseudo feminist pick me who thrives from male validation) Deserves to break away from Michael's grooming and become her own person.

ღ Micheal (3/5)

Boring, boring, boring. Groomer. His personality got more drained the more the books went on. Manchild.

ღ Banks (5.5/5)

One of the only two people with brains. Literal the strongest character in the series. Can't relate to her but I wish I could. She survived so much. Kai doesn't deserve her. Someone needs to make her happy, like actually. She deserved so much better than what she got.

ღ Kai (4/5)

Boring but not as boring as Micheal. Has a personality, ig. Has (some) braincells. (Thank God the asain genes didn't fail) He should've listened to what Banks went through. Does not behave like a very healthy partner from what we've read.

ღ Winter (5/5)

My baby. She deserved so much better. Underrated opinion, she's actually so strong. Takes everything life throws at her with a smile. The sweetest badass ever. I will defend her with my life.

ღ Damon (5/5)

My baby (derogatory). I'll protect him with my life but I'll punch him first. Actually probably the only guy with actual brain and the only one who wouldn't cheat on his wife, given the absolute chance (imo). Manchild (affectionate). I love to hate him and hate to love him. Call me Winter cuz I'm blind to his red flags.

ღ Emory (She's so amazing she broke my scale and I swear I can treat her better than Will)

Screaming, crying, throwing Alex against a WALL for what she did to my baby. She's so me. I understand her. She deserved better than Will but I'm glad she gets to be happy at least.

ღ Will (3/5)

He treated Emory horribly but past Will was the cutest sunshine ever. He deserved better. Manchild (derogatory). Idiot (derogatory). I'll fight him (affectionate).

[Not going to give it for Alex or Aydin becuz they're not main characters but Alex gets negative seventeen out of five because she's a bitch (no, not a bad bitch. Just a pick me bitch who told a recovering alcoholic she preferred him drunk) <33]

#I'm actually scared to tag this #what if the fandom comes after me 😭 #fuck it we ball. #readingrn #Yashi reviews a book #ALSO I'M SO SORRY IF THERE ARE GRAMMAR OR SPELLING MISTAKES ENGLISH ISN'T MY FIRST LANGUAGE AND I WROTE THIS IS RECORD TIMING

[wrylu]

Ello

I’m sorry we haven’t been talking much as of lately(in my opinion idk) I’m tired lmao bit uhh

How have you been? Idk how I’ve been to be honest- life’s tough lmao

But uhh I’ve been trying to make Fanart n shit but art block and no motivation is throwing me from wall to wall rn- (I don’t know how to explain it LMFAO)

but idk I honestly consider you an internet friend at this point and just checking in- I call it mental health check in’s? Idfk but Yaur

been drinking, sleeping, eating well?

What was your favorite part of the day! :3

but uh yaaa last thing ima do other then Reblogs n shit since life idk bdhdhdhenrjdjd

buh bueeeree

:333

AYE MON CHERI!!

rambling dwells under the cut :)

no need for apologies love, it's completely fine! i haven't been answering asks lately so that's why , oops

BUT I MISSED U!!!!!!<3

been feeling alright lately!! finally.. i'm sorry that life's been tough on you ;( i do hope you feel better soon

art block sucks, yeah 😭 i was in one not some time ago (not for the past couple of days, though) i kinda just drew what i wanted. stepped away from fanart for a minute!! and i know what you mean AHAHA , my art block is like i want to draw but i have no motivation. which is AWFUL

and aw, i consider you an internet friend too!! one of my best 💗 (mental health check ins!!!>)

sleep has been alright, the usual! i'm not tired all the time, so i guess that's something

I'VE BEEN MUNCHING!!!!!! really, i am eating eating - and drinks? yup, i've gotten my fair share of water (+added koolaid flavour juice 😋)

make sure you drink, eat, sleep, etc as well.. or else!

my favorite part of today was waking up and seeing all of you still here and interacting with me :) just talking to you guys! i love my societea so much I SWEARR I LOVE YOU GUUUYS 😭

ba bye my darling <3 take care, and i love you!

let me get my energy back

I LOVE YOU SM AHFUASDHAS!!!! SEE YOU LATER!! *waving*

#SORRY FOR ANY GRAMMAR/SPELLING MISTAKES YOU KNOW HOW I AM #AND ONCE AGAIN I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT ANSWERING ASKS. #AAGHH!!!! #I NEED TO GET BACK ON THE GRIND #ask #asks #askbox #moot ask #partea time!