#Multiply Thy Pain | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

reppyy · 7 months

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gh-0-stcup · 7 months

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This is exposition the episode lmao.

#ahs delicate #12x01 multiply thy pain

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emmanelson · 7 months

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#i watched for the plot #wait nvm what plot?

MATT CZUCHRY as DEX HARDING in AMERICAN HORROR STORY: DELICATE PART ONE "Multiply Thy Pain" (2023)

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maybethistimemegz · 7 months

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American Horror Story: Delicate episode 1 Multiply Thy Pain

#American Horror Story #ahsedit #Emma Roberts #mine #AHS Delicate

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whitefluffyyeti · 7 months

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American horror story "Multiply thy pain"

#american horror story #ahsedit #ahs spoilers #ash #american horror story spoilers #american horror story fx #ahs fx #emma roberts #kim kardashian

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katy-l1988 · 3 months

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Head Canon/Theory Part 3:

Eve and Lilith, allies or enemies?

We all know that Lilith was sent to hell along with Lucifer, since by offering the fruit of knowledge, they made Eve disobey the only rule imposed by God in the Garden of Eden.

Original sin is committed by Eve, who first ate the apple and then shared it with Adam. Both were punish,

Eve: "I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." (Genesis 3:16) Punishment: Pain and slavery.

Adam: "By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return." (Genesis 3:19) Punishment: Work and Death.

Now, based only in their punishments, is Eve in hell? I would sincerely say that she is. Adam should be in hell too, but he wasn't the one who opened the crack.

If this is true, wouldn't it make sense for Eve to seek revenge on who condemned her to such a fate? Answer: yes.

When Eve arrived in hell, and having died at the age of 969 according to the Bible and having populated the world with Adam, she was alone and scared.

Now, I firmly believe that just like Adam, who literally shoots lightning bolts from her hands, she has some special ability that would help her grow in hell. A Trickster perhaps.

Obviously her power could not be compared to what Lilith or Lucifer possessed, but the knowledge that they gave her would serve to create a strategy...the deals.

She spent centuries of foolish games, acquiring souls to fuel her power, but it was never enough until Charlie was born. The daughter of Lucifer and Lilith would be a spectacular tool for her revenge, in due time, of course...she just had to wait.

#hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel spoilers #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #vizziepop #hazbin spoilers #fanfic #hazbin #radio demon

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countesspetofi · 7 months

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AMERICAN HORROR STORY: DELICATE Season 12 opening titles Episode 1, "Multiply Thy Pain"

I love that they started the opening titles just as Anna's sedation was kicking in. It made the images look like something she was dreaming in a drugged stupor.

#american horror story #ahs #american horror story: delicate #american horror story season 12 #ahs s12 #title sequence #tv horror #body horror #pregnancy #childbirth #medical horror

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dont-take-me-home · 1 year

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Let me explain why I think Cain and Abel were fucking.

* I am not a bible scholar. I don’t know what bible scholars think about this. I never found scholarship about the reuse of the same phrase. But I can’t get this out of my head so you get to hear about it too.

In Genesis 3:16, it’s the ending of the Garden of Eden story, and God tells Eve how he’s punishing her for her part in the tree of knowledge debacle. The King James translation is faithful to the original here so let’s use that:

I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

To recap, that’s two punishments for womankind: (1) pregnancy and childbirth will be painful for us, and (2) we’ll want to be with men even though they rule over us. (Aside: as a straight woman I love that being attracted to men is considered a punishment. Yeah, you’re going to want to have sex with these guys no matter how much they suck.)

Then in Genesis 6:6-7 we’re with Adam and Eve’s children, Cain and Abel. Cain is upset because God liked Abel’s religious offering of slaughtered lamb more than he liked Cain’s vegetarian offering. So God tells Cain:

Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen? If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.

So... Eve desires Adam even though he rules over her, and a few short chapters later, in a story that uses very little words, the exact same words are used to say that a male someone desires Cain even though Cain rules over him. (In Hebrew: ואל אישך תשוקתך והוא ימשל בך vs. ואליך תשוקתו ואתה תמשל בו). (Genesis 6:7 could also be translated to English as "unto thee shall be its desire, and thou shalt rule over it", referring to the sin that lies at the door, but that doesn’t explain what sin has to do with anything, how come it has desires and why it’s relevant that Cain rules over it.)

There are a million interpretations for these verses, but to me the most straightforward reading is that "him" refers to Abel, and Cain and Abel are... a couple? Or at least, Abel is in love with Cain? There’s a relationship here that’s being compared to that of a husband and wife, with one side being helpless because of their desire (which, in this case, is sinful), and the other side, Cain, having all the power as the "husband".

So the way I see it, God is saying to Cain, "Don’t be so jealous of your brother, dude. If you make a good offering next time, I’ll like it just as well as I liked his. And if you don’t, well, Abel is still your cockslut, isn’t he?"

But that’s just me.

#bible fandom #or something

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tariqchosenone · 1 year

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The book of Ariana Grande's and Tariq Degraffinreed's love

Tariq found God and celebrated the passover and he had a social life.

Behold, Tariq gave up sex for God a total of 5 times in 7 years for an allotted time.

Something that is rare.

Why oh God must I suffer this harsh sexual jealousy. My fruit is withered away and and my loins are shriveled like raisins to a grape.

Thy leave from the tree of life can not sustain thee, how much more shall my privy member suffer at your hands.

My friends laughed at the dinner table and they applauded the wicked one and they gave honour and wealth to the adversary, but my fruit celebrated not, it was clothed in the sackcloth of darkness and suffering.

But I shall hope in the Almighty because I am not from Adam, I shall hope in the Almighty because I did not fall for the subtility of the serpent, instead I shall be restored and remade in the image of God and I shall replenish the earth and multiply my seed and subdue the maidens of earth why my privvy member.

Ariana Grande watered my plant and she did eat my fruit, I can not quit you she said and she did lick and caress the withered plant and it became holy in the Lord God's sight.

Ariana Suffered and her fans dwelled in darkness but her fans that died in Manchester were robots who hated God they had no soul and they had no awareness of their consciousness.

Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson were Adam and Eve, Pete had a good heart but it is not known whether he had a good heart or a evil heart.

Pete Davidson had lips smoother than oil and he spoke in the flattery of tongue and Tariq Degraffinreed tried to warn Ari about Pete but she fell victim to his wicked charms.

All of Ariana Grande's boyfriends taught her valuable lessons of wisdom about who she is.

Ariana and Tariq dwelled in deep darkness for 7 years and they embodied the spirit of suffering and evil.

You must feel some type of pain in order to learn who you are as a person.

Behold Jake Paul tried to love Ariana Grande and God permitted their love for a little season.

God stirred up female social media influencers and female viners and female A-list celebrities to fight over Tariq's fruit and his two stones within his loins.

Behold in the spirit of jealousy there is more wisdom about your character and your heart than in the book of Job.

Jealousy is source of life for the the Lord God because it teaches him all of his weak areas and strong areas of judgment.

Therefor it is good to be a little jealous in order to grow and sometimes it shall be overbearing and it will overcome you

A man or woman will gain wisdom and knowledge on how to get many wisdom and a woman will not gain wisdom by obtaining a wealthy husband but only through the spirit of jealousy that dark angel who dwells as king of the bottomless pit, Apollyon can a man and woman find knowledge and wisdom.

A man who was jealous and a woman who was jealous both of their bones will be filled with light, the fat of marrow, and their blood shall be overcome not with the breath of life from Adam but they shall be overcome with fruitfulness derived from the image of God.

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officialyourdailyinspiration · 1 year

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Prayer of a suffering penitent

A Psalm of David, to bring to remembrance.

1 O Jehovah, rebuke me not in thy wrath; Neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure. 2 For thine arrows stick fast in me, And thy hand presseth me sore. 3 There is no soundness in my flesh because of thine indignation; Neither is there any health in my bones because of my sin. 4 For mine iniquities are gone over my head: As a heavy burden they are too heavy for me. 5 My wounds are loathsome and corrupt, Because of my foolishness. 6 I am pained and bowed down greatly; I go mourning all the day long. 7 For my loins are filled with burning; And there is no soundness in my flesh. 8 I am faint and sore bruised: I have groaned by reason of the disquietness of my heart. 9 Lord, all my desire is before thee; And my groaning is not hid from thee. 10 My heart throbbeth, my strength faileth me: As for the light of mine eyes, it also is gone from me. 11 My lovers and my friends stand aloof from my plague; And my kinsmen stand afar off. 12 They also that seek after my life lay snares for me; And they that seek my hurt speak mischievous things, And meditate deceits all the day long. 13 But I, as a deaf man, hear not; And I am as a dumb man that openeth not his mouth. 14 Yea, I am as a man that heareth not, And in whose mouth are no reproofs. 15 For in thee, O Jehovah, do I hope: Thou wilt answer, O Lord my God. 16 For I said, Lest they rejoice over me: When my foot slippeth, they magnify themselves against me. 17 For I am ready to fall, And my sorrow is continually before me. 18 For I will declare mine iniquity; I will be sorry for my sin. 19 But mine enemies are lively, and are strong; And they that hate me wrongfully are multiplied. 20 They also that render evil for good Are adversaries unto me, because I follow the thing that is good. 21 Forsake me not, O Jehovah: O my God, be not far from me. 22 Make haste to help me, O Lord, my salvation. — Psalm 38 | American Standard Version (ASV) The American Standard Version Bible is in the public domain. Cross References: Ezra 9:6; Job 6:4; Job 19:5; Job 30:28; Job 33:19; Psalm 6:1; Psalm 6:7; Psalm 13:2; Psalm 27:1; Psalm 31:11; Psalm 32:5; Psalm 35:4; Psalm 39:2; Psalm 39:7; Psalm 69:4-5; Psalm 102:3; Psalm 102:5; Psalm 119:8; Lamentations 1:13; 1 John 3:12

#plea #healing #penitent #sufferer #Psalm 38 #Book of Psalms #Old Testament #ASV #American Standard Version Bible

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reppyy · 7 months

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apilgrimsjournal · 1 year

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My Prince of Peace

Psalm 103:8 The LORD is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.

To God’s glory alone, Papa has been discharged from the hospital earlier this morning. The doctors said that his gallbladder is inflamed and his prostate is enlarged but surgery is not necessary. I felt a wave of relief in my heart after hearing the news that Papa does not need to spend the new year’s eve in the hospital. I have been crying at night and on random moments of the day in fear of losing Papa but all along, it is Christ who carried me through this whole process. I was prompted by the Holy Spirit to depend on Him alone for comfort more than I look to others for sympathy and consolation that is why I told no one in my dgroup about Papa’s hospitalization. As of now, Papa is resting and he still feels pain but he was given medications and advised to come back after 7 days if his symptoms persist. God has already been so gracious enough so I know that after 7 days, whatever His will is, it will always be the best for me and my father. Truly, when you make God your only refuge and fortress, He will show you that He is indeed the Prince of Peace who gives peace which exceeds all understanding. As the psalmist said, it is good for me that I have been afflicted that I might learn His statutes. And to conclude this day, let me tell you a hymn which sums it all.

He Giveth More Grace by Annie Johnson Flint (1866-1932)

He giveth more grace when the burdens grow greater,

He sendeth more strength when the labors increase;

To added afflictions He addeth His mercy,

To multiplied trials, His multiplied peace.

When we have exhausted our store of endurance,

When our strength has failed ere the day is half done,

When we reach the end of our hoarded resources

Our Father’s full giving is only begun.

Fear not that thy need shall exceed His provision,

Our God ever yearns His resources to share;

Lean hard on the arm everlasting, availing;

The Father both thee and thy load will upbear.

His love has no limits, His grace has no measure,

His power no boundary known unto men;

For out of His infinite riches in Jesus

He giveth, and giveth, and giveth again!

#christian #hope #jesussaves #love #hymn

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bloodandcanvas · 2 years

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women allies to the patriarchal panopticon

The other day while reading Genesis, there were parts of the text (and this does not come as a surprise to me) that I had to deal with, and have to continue to do so. According to the authors of Genesis 3 - the chapter narrating the events of the Fall of Man - that after the fact, God tells Eve

"…I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and they conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; thy desire shall be for thy husband and he shall rule over thee."

then He tells Adam

"..Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Though shall not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life. Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herd of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it was thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return."

Now I know that these may or may not have really transpired in the history of our making given the allusions and similarities to other earlier accounts of creation from other regions and cultures - we do not really know what took place before the beginning of time. I am not here to deal with that.

What I am writing to wrestle with, given brand new eyes, is the patriarchal panopticon from which these texts have been seemingly written - the woman tempting the man brought forth the consequence of she desiring him as he rules over her. She, a subject of blame and ridicule. This fall of man is seen not only in narration, but also from what minds the narration had been written - from either conscious or unconscious hands that desire rulership and power in favor of the man.

Given that the first punishment is for the woman, the writers, I think, in an endeavor to bring justice so as not to seem so brutal to the woman gave also a curse upon the man. Yet, there seems to be presented a significant difference -

"In sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; thy desire shall be for thy husband and he shall rule over thee." - the pain of women comes from both within and without. We are both born with and born into pain.

Yet with man,

"in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life" - the pain of men only comes (as the writers place it) from without.

As if the woman is deserving of blame and punishment for the evils of the world while the man is merely a victim, a casualty of her sin.

Now, I do not doubt that I have my lapses when it comes to literacy and theology - I am not a student of such. But, I am, however, a woman who was born into a panopticon that is the religious institution.

While I do not blame God for the messiness and delicate intricacies of the Bible having an abundance of human fingerprints, I do attribute the Bible for how certain Christians hold women up to a certain standard so they can be deemed "worthy" or "righteous" - i.e.: our abstinence from sexual activities.

While Christian men are held at the same standard with regards to not having sex, the implication to that religious context and community do not bear the same weight with these sexes. Like all other institutions and organizations, the church is not exempt from the patriarchy and its internalized misogyny. From confessions in repentance or casual conversations, men were always surprised why their fellow men HAVE NOT YET engaged in sexual activities while men and women alike are always surprised when women HAVE already. By the narratives I have been told, men (yes, including or maybe even especially Christian men) even slightly brag about their experiences so casually with each other while women exchange their experiences in a crevice of comfort they can serendipitously find for they can confide only in a few and shall be condemned by most other women.

I know, because I am one of those women. I know because I have only had conversations on sex with one other Christian woman. I am one of the women who thinks of sexuality differently within a world that glorifies purity culture. And by think differently, I mean I think there is nothing shameful about it.

AND YET.

While women are shamed for their consensual sexual experiences, men are left off the hook for their non-consensual sexual advances towards women (sometimes towards men too). It is so infuriatingly painful how the sexual victims I know within the church scour everything they have to find evidence only to be shrugged off by the mere denial of the male predator or by "the evidence is not enough; no one will believe you."

As if getting the courage to speak is not hard enough, as if we could benefit from telling what will potentially humiliate us - for if we are humiliated for consensual sexual experiences what more the non-consensual. As if being a victim and wanting to actively bring justice is not a large enough mountain to move.

BUT TAKING THE MISOGYNY A STEP FURTHER,

It is a mournful thing to know that in attempt to conjur male validation and explain to herself why women at church don't engage with her as much as they do with each other, this certain person spreads "holy rumors" about the women I love claiming that their reason for their avoiding her is because with her, men are different; with her, men can abstain; with her, men submit and listen - the men she dated a week after these men ended their relationship with her former supposed "friends." How completely delusional can you be to think that your absence of sexual activities is the cause of our avoidance and the cause of men's "submission"? How shallow do you have to think other women are to make yourself appear "holier" or "the bigger person"? How narcissistic it is to think that men worship your "holiness" and to think that it is men that place you in the pedestal of "righteous woman"? How high do you have to think of yourself to see your virginity as above the women who have lost theirs? The presence of our sexual relationships does not make any woman who is absent of it incredibly holy and righteous. Virginity does not make you god.

This is internalized misogyny in the purity culture - that even women in their quest to be above other women so men can see her on the pedestal she has placed herself on, will actively shame and ridicule other women.

#feminism #feminist #sexuality

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incarnateirony · 21 days

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April 8 - Luna, The Priestess

Liber AL, Cap I.

(As prior, abridged, full available in the link)

Had! The manifestation of Nuit. The unveiling of the company of heaven. Every man and every woman is a star. Every number is infinite; there is no difference. Help me, o warrior lord of Thebes, in my unveiling before the Children of men! Be thou Hadit, my secret centre, my heart & my tongue! Behold! it is revealed by Aiwass the minister of Hoor-paar-kraat. I am above you and in you. My ecstasy is in yours. My joy is to see your joy.

Above, the gemmèd azure is The naked splendour of Nuit; She bends in ecstasy to kiss The secret ardours of Hadit. The wingèd globe, the starry blue, Are mine, O Ankh-af-na-khonsu!

Now ye shall know that the chosen priest & apostle of infinite space is the prince-priest the Beast; and in his woman called the Scarlet Woman is all power given. They shall gather my children into their fold: they shall bring the glory of the stars into the hearts of men.

For he is ever a sun, and she a moon. But to him is the winged secret flame, and to her the stooping starlight. But ye are not so chosen. Burn upon their brows, o splendrous serpent! O azure-lidded woman, bend upon them! The key of the rituals is in the secret word which I have given unto him. With the God & the Adorer I am nothing: they do not see me. They are as upon the earth; I am Heaven, and there is no other God than me, and my lord Hadit.

Now, therefore, I am known to ye by my name Nuit, and to him by a secret name which I will give him when at last he knoweth me. Since I am Infinite Space, and the Infinite Stars thereof, do ye also thus. Bind nothing! Let there be no difference made among you between any one thing & any other thing; for thereby there cometh hurt.

But whoso availeth in this, let him be the chief of all! I am Nuit, and my word is six and fifty. Divide, add, multiply, and understand.

Then saith the prophet and slave of the beauteous one: Who am I, and what shall be the sign? So she answered him, bending down, a lambent flame of blue, all-touching, all penetrant, her lovely hands upon the black earth, & her lithe body arched for love, and her soft feet not hurting the little flowers: Thou knowest! And the sign shall be my ecstasy, the consciousness of the continuity of existence, the omnipresence of my body.

And let them speak not of thee at all, since thou art continuous! None, breathed the light, faint & faery, of the stars, and two. For I am divided for love’s sake, for the chance of union. This is the creation of the world, that the pain of division is as nothing, and the joy of dissolution all.

For these fools of men and their woes care not thou at all! They feel little; what is, is balanced by weak joys; but ye are my chosen ones. Obey my prophet! follow out the ordeals of my knowledge! seek me only! Then the joys of my love will redeem ye from all pain. This is so: I swear it by the vault of my body; by my sacred heart and tongue; by all I can give, by all I desire of ye all.

Then the priest fell into a deep trance or swoon, & said unto the Queen of Heaven; Write unto us the ordeals; write unto us the rituals; write unto us the law!

But she said: the ordeals I write not: the rituals shall be half known and half concealed: the Law is for all.

This that thou writest is the threefold book of Law.

The word of the Law is Θελημα.

Let it be that state of manyhood bound and loathing. So with thy all; thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that, and no other shall say nay. For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect. The Perfect and the Perfect are one Perfect and not two; nay, are none! But they have the half: unite by thine art so that all disappear. My prophet is a fool with his one, one, one; are not they the Ox, and none by the Book?

Abrogate are all rituals, all ordeals, all words and signs. Ra-Hoor-Khuit hath taken his seat in the East at the Equinox of the Gods; and let Asar be with Isa, who also are one. But they are not of me. Let Asar be the adorant, Isa the sufferer; Hoor in his secret name and splendour is the Lord initiating.

There is a word to say about the Hierophantic task. Behold! there are three ordeals in one, and it may be given in three ways. The gross must pass through fire; let the fine be tried in intellect, and the lofty chosen ones in the highest. Thus ye have star & star, system & system; let not one know well the other! If this be not aright; if ye confound the space-marks, saying: They are one; or saying, They are many; if the ritual be not ever unto me: then expect the direful judgments of Ra Hoor Khuit!

This shall regenerate the world, the little world my sister, my heart & my tongue, unto whom I send this kiss. Also, o scribe and prophet, though thou be of the princes, it shall not assuage thee nor absolve thee. But ecstasy be thine and joy of earth: ever To me! To me!

Change not as much as the style of a letter; for behold! thou, o prophet, shalt not behold all these mysteries hidden therein.

Invoke me under my stars! Love is the law, love under will. Nor let the fools mistake love; for there are love and love. There is the dove, and there is the serpent. Choose ye well! He, my prophet, hath chosen, knowing the law of the fortress, and the great mystery of the House of God.

All these old letters of my Book are aright; but צ is not the Star. This also is secret: my prophet shall reveal it to the wise. I give unimaginable joys on earth: certainty, not faith, while in life, upon death; peace unutterable, rest, ecstasy; nor do I demand aught in sacrifice.

My number is 11, as all their numbers who are of us. The Five Pointed Star, with a Circle in the Middle, & the circle is Red. My colour is black to the blind, but the blue & gold are seen of the seeing. Also I have a secret glory for them that love me.

At all my meetings with you shall the priestess say— and her eyes shall burn with desire as she stands bare and rejoicing in my secret temple— To me! To me! Sing the rapturous love-song unto me! I am the blue-lidded daughter of Sunset; I am the naked brilliance of the voluptuous night-sky. To me! To me!

The Manifestation of Nuit is at an end.

In the true religion there is no sect, therefore take heed that thou blaspheme not the name by which another knoweth his God; for if thou do this thing in Jupiter thou wilt blaspheme יהוה and in Osiris יהשוה. A.E.T.E.R.N.I.T.A.S. If thine own soul be baseless how wilt thou find a standing point whence to fix the soul of the Universe? "Christus de Christi, Mercury de Mercurio, Per viam crucis, Per vitam Lucis Deus te Adjutabitur"

Mine are the dark-blue waves of music in the song that I made of old to invoke Thee – Strike, strike the master chord! Draw, draw the Flaming Sword! Crowned Child and Conquering Lord, Horus, avenger! By the Song I invoke Thee! In my hand is thy Sword of Revenge ; let it strike at Thy Bidding! By the Sword I invoke Thee! By the sun, by the sun, I evoke thee!

beyond the Word and the Fool; yea, beyond the Word and the Fool.

Let the Magus act thus in his conjuration.

youtube

#base post for those in tomorrow #it isn't as if everything isn't already written below #this will be for additions i suppose

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a-safe-and-quiet-place · 4 months

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Thou shall not multiply thy pain

(AI + Photoshop)

Scenes reproducing a past known very well to me, and yeah this might look clichê to the normal reader but it's my page, my project and we all need some healthy ways to cope with pain when we have no other way to escape.

"I'm gonna be uploading some AI Generated scenes of how i feel, how it felt, how it used to feel as kind of a personal project of mine.

Remember you can check my other projects such as mixing pokemons colors & forms with other animes or making mythology trippy while explaining each deity & entity history or myth here respectively.

https://www.instagram.com/pokemontrippyart/

https://www.instagram.com/madmythicalcreatures "

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benjamin-vague · 4 months

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Ridens Rode Me

Imagine a world born for you,

Born to bear you out into your own manifold

Greatness and so to form the frame

By which whatever great

Allotment of genius be in those brittle bones

And burning skin may be known.

Imagine the emptiness of that and

The horrible waste!

For if the world came to be for you

And only you, and you have seen (no matter

How very much of it you think you have seen)

So little of its curious quality,

It must live, dim, and die without you ever knowing

Its secret hugeness as you must live, dim,

And die in it.

Does dust know its own name?

(That depends: do you?) Does love speak with its

Own dire self-drinking voice from other throats

In the wallowing waters

Of this dreamy doom we share by the shores

Of the foreign land called Embodied-ness?

Or was it only ever your voice calling from other

Throats, in tattooing "I love you, I love you,

I do, and I will spend this blood

For you and only you" across this deep skin of soul by

Which we bind our mutual fates, tearful and struck

With the subtle fire

So the Art could be born -- again, again,

Again in immensity--rather than languish unspent?

(That depends: how much of the one have you demanded

In constant, unquestioned craving

And how much of the other have you freely given,

The craving at last in sweet surcease?)

And now imagine instead a world into which you are

Born to express that world's terrible greatness in this

New Human Configuration. Is it this world, the correct world

Of our mutual experience we can never truly tame

Either by logic or the mystic urge?

Well, who can say? (Only you and only I; you for

Only you as only I for lonesome I.) But this I see:

Whether fact or merely phantasms of a fanatic's

False philosophy, the careful

Calculus of our composition may only ever contract

And diminish under the tutelage of one,

And only ever multiply with the aid of the other.

How dare we demand the world be limited to our

Own times and natures? How dare we declare

Meaning must exist in understandable form

Beyond us when we already are given to one another

As a salvation and a damnation both?

And suddenly the strange math seems sensible to me,

Yes, and good and right and true; suddenly

It seems preferable that we should

Boil forth in seeded swathes from father's sword

And into mother's cup: to burst in our turn

Upon the blood-watered soil but not before we

See the shape staring back at us from the storied halls

Of a dimly dreamt Old Mystery. It is neither I nor you,

But only we: a Mandelbrot affinity signified

By time and tide and there again by encircling time.

And this is why I seek to serve others

With my little mannish works;

It is at last the only thing that serves me,

Sustains me.

We are not born strictly for our own pleasure and

Pain, I think, but to connect by permeable membranes

And through them

With that of others and to see--be--need--

Both more and less at once. From "I" to

"Thy" and thus to "Us"; with this alchemy

I am always among family, even

When I am utterly, hopelessly yet heartfully

Alone. I am finally never alone;

The tribe I carry within me is unnumbered

And they also carry me. I often

Cry for this knowledge, the humility of our humanity --

I am crying now --

And the tears too are good, so sweetly

Cruel and deep.

And it is finally not tragical to me but some

Form of wondrous-rare magic

That any of this should be at all, that we

Should live to wonderingly touch fingers to death's

Cold cheek upon the dais of its self-consumption

And in so doing feel the fleshly fineness of our

Own hot-blooded one with greater gravity.

And in this mortal majesty -- for it is majestic

To me -- must weep all the

Shade-faced thin-natured gods of our naming

With much wringing of hands and a burning jealousy.

How could eternity

And its dually dreaming and dreamt-of denizens

Ever hope to compete with our particularity

And these brief moments of Embodied-ness?

We are the fortunate dying, who know

Sacredness and substance through

That final Artful dissolution every bit as much

As in all that comes before it. I have elected

That I shall die well when the time is right --

As well and perhaps

Better than I have lived, will yet live --

And will not suffer small rescue by human hand

Or condemning god to unchain me from

This, my beloved fate.

Such proud temerity there is in my trembling heart,

In our shared heart-of-hearts.

How dared I (and we) ever demand more than this:

The chance to reason, to dream upon the sea,

And in seeing it, learn to release ourselves

From the bleak bondage of eternity?

The mortal gall! I can only

Laugh and laugh and laugh, as my god Ridens

rode me right on through the enfolding of

My own Old Mystery. There we met and

Will yet meet,

Wet with the labor of keeping chin above

This water that bears us ever on,

And I love you so; all is well in this wet

Heaven-wrought-in-hell. Yes indeed, all is well

And ever will it be...

But only in those quiet moments when

We remember this:

The blood-salted water of Truth Alone

Does not sustain us; it is not enough.

With it, we must sustain each other

And ourselves,

Unto death through the tumult of tides,

Directly from our living birth.

I beg you, let there be no lie between us!

It simply is not worthy of our keeping.

#prose #poetry #creative writing #spilled ink #spilled words #art #lit #original literature #spilled thoughts #philosophy #love #self love

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