#The fucking angst. give me that shit

[mqkoeyes]

this fanfic.

#sefikura #sephiroth #cloud strife #advent children #fanfic #i revisit it every few months or so and AGGGGHHG #I LOVE IT SO MUCH #THANK YOU IMAGINATIVE SPIRIT WHOMEVER YOU MAY BE #The fucking angst. give me that shit #THE CHARACTER PORTRAYALS ARE SO GOOD DON'T TALK TK ME #if i could eat this fic i would #gonna inject this shit into my veins #gonna chug it like i haven't had anythjng to drink in 5 years #gonna breathe it in like it's my oxygen #my drug #AHHHHHGGGGG IT'S SO GOOD #starts bawling #i love them so much #they're perfect your honor #i'm crazy i'm crazy i'm insane i'm bouncing off the walls i'm GROWLING AND HGAGAGGRGRGRRRRR i'm infatuated. #sefikura being the best ship in the universe sorry i don't make the rules #oh god oh fuck #don't read it while listening to emotional love songs or smth cuz TRUST you will sob your eyes out of their sockets #my eyes are watering #my love for this fic #mwah mwah mwah mwahhhh it makes me so insane

[averageludwig]

Me I remember that grown ass mercenaries living in the 60s, working for two teams against each other, WILL experience violent internalized homophobia

#averitext #every time I remember how much shit Demosolly has to go through to work #okay what the fuck #them being in cross factions makes it 100 times worse #like for example heavy medic wont go through half of it cuz its easier to accept your like your teammate #SOLDIER ON THE OTHER HAND #he really gives a fuck about this whole team shit #god its over #demoman and his traditional upbringing dont even get me started #the angst stuffed in this silly ship has to be studied #what do you MEAN this is not the most popular pair

[poisoned-pearls]

❗❗❗❗❗❗

BOTHERING YOU!!! I AM INTERESTED!!!

AUGHH OKAY OKAY SO-

It’s INCREDIBLY similar to canon, that’s like, half of the point. Jamil and Azul have been in the same class for their whole school a career and I firmly believe Azul has HAD a crush on him since their first year even in canon (ex. “I’ve always been curious about you since we were first years.”)

so in this au it happened completely on accident. Since they were only around 3 weeks- a month into school, Jamil didn’t have kalim to worry about yet (who arrived a month later) and azul didn’t have such a large reputation (so Jamil was a little less cautious). Potion project, truth serum. Should be easy right? That was until azul accidentally lost balance and tried to catch himself on the cauldron, sending it all over him and into his mouth.

so when Jamil leans over to ask if he’s okay, because a giant metal thing just tipped over him, the first thing out of his mouth is “great seven you’re gorgeous.”

when Jamil is promptly like “what” Azul literally can not control his tongue and is like “please go on a date with me-“ and Jamil just stares at him for a moment before going “…sure” because, well, hell. He’s free from kalim for the first time in his life, he thinks he’s pretty too, it’s worth a shot and he’s under a truth potion, so at least he knows he finds him attractive. So sure, couldn’t hurt to try.

And it did, in fact, not hurt to try, they snuck their way up the astronomy tower and had a nice dinner that azul made. And they were both, very very happy.

another date later (this time by Jamil, where they played mancala in one of the scarabian common places) and they were official.

And a month later, (a week or so after kalim transferred) Jamil joined basketball and Azul became his number one fan, where a year later Ace learns about his existence from

Azul keeps Jamil from becoming more stressed about kalim, and Jamil uses his study guides to not go insane. Jamil also becomes a third enforcer for the monstro lounge, and knows EXACTLY how everything works, because hell he was there right next to Azul and helping him figure it all out when it was happening. He’ll catch someone trying to run from Azul and his contracts and toss them right back into the shark pit.

theyre also horrible. Like the most couple to ever couple. Jamil waits outside every housewarden meeting to walk with Azul, they always either bring breakfast or coffee for each other (they’ll switch it up on who brings it each day). Hell even Ace originally knew Azul as “Jamil’s boyfriend from octavinelle” during games.

#Also I think that Azul wouldn’t overblot (because Jamil would seriously help with his self esteem and because JAMIL SHOULD PUNCH LEONA-) #Listen I’m not a Leona hater #But I didn’t like him during book 3- #Listen I’m sorry I just can’t sympathize that strongly with a guy who is still rich as hell and royalty #You don’t have to work #I don’t feel that bad for you not being king #Jamil probably would still overblot but I have angst for that #Angst you’d probably like actually #You know when you were thinking about Jamil feeling bad after his overblot?? #Imagine how he’d feel knowing he chucked his boyfriend halfway across the desert #But yeah #the sillies #id also think it’d be FUCKING HILARIOUS for canon Jamil to meet this jamil #“Oh shit the magic is all messed up- give me a second I need to call my bf to make sure he’s okay” #“Your what” #“My… boyfriend? What you don’t have one?” #“NO????” #“Life must suck for you then.” #“What? You think I need someone to be happy?” #“Well are you?” #“…” #(He feels bad because he doesn’t get Azul and weighted blanket cuddles when he’s sad) #(He feels bad thinking about all of the bad mental episodes Azul’s helped him through) #After Jamil figures out the other version of him is dating Azul he’s like “Him?? That schemer-??” #He insults him so much other Jamil is like “listen I don’t care if your me I can only take so many insults to my boyfriend before I just #Fight you.” #Jamil vs jamil #jamil viper #Azul Ashengrotto #jamiazu

[well-dressed-sewer-rat]

(tw blood)

just a silly little guy <3

(explanation in the tags + more stuff under the cut because i’m indecisive as hell)

#the rat doing an angst art for once?? damnn #was gonna shove fyodor’s body in there too but i couldn’t get it right and was unfortunately out of fucks to give #anyway this is based on a possible ending to bsd me and dia came up with the other day #basically the classic nikolai-kills-fyodor-but-doesn’t-know-where-to-go-from-there trope #but instead of nikolai’s despair manifesting as just ‘damn. now what’ #he realizes fyodor was indeed not the thing keeping him from his freedom and neither was the government the law society etc #kolyas definition of freedom is being above literally anything and everything that could possibly hold him back #in simple terms. he’s trying to be a god without realizing it #hence why he treats normal human emotions such as guilt and regret for his crimes as chains holding him down #and shoves them under a cardboard personality that doesn’t experience these at all #so now that he realizes he himself is the only thing stopping him from attaining his definition of freedom #he’s like oh shit does that mean the very reason i’ve been living was nothing more than an illusion? and other misc mental breakdown vibes #if you read all that. damn wow i mean thanks #i diagnose you with gogol stan #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #nikolai gogol #nikolai gogol bsd #bsd nikolai gogol #nikolai bsd #bsd nikolai #bsd gogol #gogol bsd #bsd nikolai fanart #bsd fanart #fyolai #tw blood #bsd [rat edition]

[angst-is-love-angst-is-life]

Hey! Something nice about writing anything for Coex again. fucking hell I can’t escape is that I can always— 100% of the time— erase Stein’s death!

#*hallelujah plays* #*cheers erupt* #no need to thank me #just doing my part #a very small part #besides #we need balance #if Barry’s having a shit time the least I can do is give everyone else a less shitty time #martin stein #let him retire in peace damn it #I get the writing decision because it fucking HURTS #but still #my posts #the flash #(technically) #legends of tomorrow #dc legends of tomorrow #crisis on earth x #angst-is-love-angst-is-life rewriting canon’s wrongs one fic at a time #and making life worse for Barry Allen along the way

[looseleafteeaves]

Okay so I am SLOWLY continuing work on this! No idea when chapter two will be posted, but I AM working on it. Here is a snippet.

—

‘Jaime, I can sense the young justice team on the other side of the door. It appears that we managed to be invited after the Impulse.’

Jaime, moving forwards without fear prior to this, freezes. He hadn’t- His team! They were right there! He could talk to them again-

His team. Who hadn’t noticed for 2 years that he was- That something was wrong.

2 years of paranoia and frustration and anxiety and hope and disappointment and the bitterness of betrayal. Because Khaji, as great at playing Jaime as they were, had faked it badly on purpose. And still no one noticed.

Batman glanced at him. “Blue Beetle? What’s wrong?”

“I know that I said we time travelled to stop a bad future but I forgot that I would see the people I knew again, and-“

Batman’s slight glare deepens. “Did they all die? Why didn’t you lead with-“

“No sir, they didn’t die.” Jaime stopped talking there, trying to prevent the spiral that would occur if he continued.

“Were they controlled? Benched? Hurt in some way?”

“For TWO YEARS not a SINGLE person on my team, my second family, noticed that something was wrong. Have you ever experienced that? Add the knowledge that the one controlling you was PURPOSEFULLY PRETENDING BADLY. So yes, I have some mixed feelings.”

Batman stared. Jaime noticed, flipped up his hood, and retreated backwards in his mind.

Khaji Da, thrust into the driver’s seat without warning, sighed, deeply and with feeling.

#desperate measures au #teeves does blue beetle #blue beetle #jaime reyes #khaji da #khaji da: well shit. jaime you fuck #khaji da: you ditched me here. take it back #khaji da: the team can’t meet me first. i’ll ruin the whole thing. #jaime: i’m to busy angst in our mind to give a shit. cry about it beetle boy. #khaji da:… #jaime: … shit. I got myself too. #khaji da: 😂 #khaji da: *shoves jaime back into the drivers seat* get wrecked n00b. #jaime: WHAT THE FUCK. WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT. VETO. #sorry #i got carried away #headcannons #feed the machine #*kicks writing brain* get to work. refocus.

[thedragonemperess]

I can't wait for the FNAF movie for no other reason than I know for a FACT that the angst edits adn animatics are gonna be off the fucking CHARTS

#'and give me just one more chance #one more glance #and i will make of you #yeah im gonna make of you #another believeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr' #<- can you fucking IMAGINE #the micheal + william + evan + henry angst you could MAKE OF THAT SHIT????? #so many reasons to learn to draw and not nearly enough time in the summer #marankton speaks because why not #fnaf #fnaf movie

[iridescentis]

just spent several hours reading oneshots having a wonderful time

#im telling you #nothing is better than the same getting together oneshot in different scenarios #add a dash of angst? fuck yeah #hurt/comfort? awesome #fluffy dumbasses? always #give me the same shit in different fonts #make that a great evening

[megane-sama]

Reading csm immediately after getting up to date with jjk was a mistake.

If i see Gege or Fujimoto on these streets, on God trust, they will be dealt with.

#im actually crying at 1am wtf #and i knew what was going to happen oh #But the power of happy found family was too hard to resist #i got attached #you know #like a moron #and now its going to be snatched away from me #AND I KNEW #God i haven't been this unprotected with already known plot knowledge since i watched Devilman Crybaby #don't talk to me im in shambles actually #and buddy daddies will still come along later today to give me angst?! #no nah😭 #putting csm in the fuck you im never rereading this shit again pile #at least not in the next 5 years #chainsaw man #csm

[dykerikki]

lmfao????

#informed a blog id been following SIX YEARS last night that something thry rbed flagged my terf filters #woke up to no response and blocked. lol . lmao even? good riddance you apathetic coward fuck? #idk. it does make me sad! it does! idk if they were crypto themselves or just dont care! neither is great! six years! #its such a small stupid thing to angst over like gun to my head could not tell you this persons name or if they ever blogged about their #personal shit. just! idk! why cant people be good! why cant people give a shit!! whatever whatever whateverrrrr. its sad #txtpost or whatever

[starkillerbass]

I want to write some really tragic, angsty and heartbreaking shit. Like nah I’m not making anything better, I’m gonna break your heart, put it back together and fully shatter it.

#basically the idea for my next fic #fuck it up fic #fix it fics aren’t half as fun as break it fics #like give me angst and heartbreak #like please not #but writing angst and tragic shit is pretty nice and iconic #probs gonna be a rizzles fic #jane rizzoli #jane and maura #maura isles #rizzles #rizzles fanfic #rizzoli and isles fanfic

[set-phasers-to-whump]

the motherland don't love you, the fatherland don't love you, so why love anything?

prompt: drowning their sorrows

whumpee: kind of all 3 of napoleon solo, illya kuryakin, gaby teller

fandom: the man from uncle

hey!! this fic is a bit different from my usual stuff, it's much more about the angst and kind of the character study type aspect, so it's not whump in a traditional sense. nonetheless i really enjoyed writing it and i hope you like reading it!! (title from ya hey by vampire weekend)

“Listen,” Napoleon says, after his sixth or seventh glass of Scotch. “Fuck the Central Intelligence Agency.”

Gaby raises an eyebrow at him, takes a sip from her glass, and waits for him to say something else. 

Napoleon, however, seems to have lost his train of thought. “Fuck the CIA,” he repeats. “Nothing but a bunch of extortionists.”

“Yeah,” Gaby agrees, with the tone of one who doesn’t know exactly what it is they’re agreeing with but who is staunchly in support of it nonetheless. “Fuck the CIA,” she echoes, giggling at the English curse. 

Napoleon smiles, then grows serious, evidently having remembered his earlier thoughts. He sets his glass down with a thump. 

“No, really. I mean, God knows I’m no saint, but…look at us.” He gestures in a vague circle that encompasses himself, Gaby, and Illya, all painted with bruises and cuts of varying severity, marks of a severely botched mission and the reason for their present collective inebriation. 

Napoleon then gestures to himself, prods at his fresh black eye with a bit more force than is wise. “Ow.”

“We do not work for the CIA,” Illya points out, speaking slowly to avoid jumbling his words. “Only you.”

Napoleon scowls at him. “Not the point, Peril. My point is…my point is, how often have we looked like this because of an UNCLE mission?”

Illya shrugs, scrunching up his face like he’s actually trying to count. 

Gaby answers for him. “Not very often. Not this bad.”

Napoleon points at her. “Exactly. UNCLE has better intel - well, maybe not this time, but you know - and they actually sort of care about us. Like, Waverly probably wouldn’t threaten me with prison if I was a little cheeky with him. Probably.”

Gaby and Illya both nod. 

“And,” Napoleon starts, more to indicate that he wants to keep talking and less to introduce a well thought-out sentence, “and. Okay. I mean, I’ve never been in the KGB and I didn’t grow up in East Berlin, so I can’t really speak for you guys, but my boss here?” 

He stops, considers his use of prepositions, realizes they’re not actually in the States at the moment, and rephrases. “Back in the US, I mean. Sanders, my boss, terrible man, really, talking a big game about the country being on top of the world like he’s the one who put it there. Anyway. He threatens me with prison pretty much weekly.”

Gaby looks at him intently. “Can he actually send you to prison?”

Napoleon shrugs, does his best to be nonchalant. “Probably. It wouldn’t be too hard to convince whoever it is that needs convincing. I mean, sure, I’m useful as an agent, but at the end of the day I’m nothing but a dirty thief who should worship the ground the CIA…well, I guess the CIA as like, a thing, can’t walk, but you know…I should worship the ground the CIA walks on because they kept me out of prison. Not that working for them is anything like freedom.”

“I understand,” Gaby says, leaning slightly against Napoleon’s shoulder, partly as a gesture of comfort and solidarity and partly because everything has gone a little spinny. She waits until the feeling subsides, then speaks up again. 

“In Berlin, they trap us. East Germany is supposed to be a good place, that’s what they tell you, but then they build this wall through the city. And what are we supposed to do? We can’t go over it, they will kill us. It’s like they don’t understand that it’s the same city on both sides. There’s no freedom like that. I don’t even miss it.”

She falls silent, finishes her drink, pours another, contemplates it for a moment. 

“I do miss it, I guess. Is it possible to not miss your home?”

Her eyes have gone a bit glassy. Unconsciously, she rubs at the fresh red scratch on her cheek. 

“It isn’t like East Germany ever cared about me. Or anyone, really. Do you know how many people they arrest every day? For nothing. They questioned me about my birth father once. Two years ago they arrested my neighbor for…how is it in English? Sed… something. They said he was against the state. He was only a painter.”

“Sedition,” Napoleon chimes in, shaking his head. 

Gaby nods. “That’s it. Sedition.” She pronounces the word carefully, committing it to memory. “And even then I - I do miss it. Even after everything. There is nothing left for me there, no one. Still, sometimes I think about how I can never go back, and I think it should feel like…like freedom, but it doesn’t.”

She leans more heavily into Napoleon and shuts her eyes. She will not cry over this. Over a place that does not care for her in the slightest. Over a place that she is indifferent to and misses in the same breath. 

A soft silence. Gaby scrubs at her eyes. Illya shifts slightly in his chair, keenly aware of the fact that it would seem to be his turn. 

He finishes the last of his drink - he doesn’t know what it is, something Napoleon made that had tasted good earlier but is now horribly bitter. He doesn’t know how many of these terrible drinks he’s had. He should have kept count. He shouldn’t be so drunk. But he is, and so his tongue is loosened. He takes a deep breath and tries not to wince when his bruised ribs protest. 

“My father was not a good man,” he says, and then stops. Napoleon and Gaby both look at him, attentive. He looks away, continues after a beat. 

“He was arrested. Sent to Gulag. He stole money from the Party. I thought, they will kill him. But he is still alive. No one can see him. They will maybe tell me when he dies, I don’t know.”

He pauses, considers, formulates the English words. “He is a criminal. Or else they would have freed him. He is in prison for almost twenty years. Oleg Grigorievich, he says to me sometimes… Solo,” he says suddenly, looking at his partner. 

Napoleon looks back at him with startling intensity. “Yeah?”

“You said that Sanders, he threatens you with prison, yes?” Illya asks, and then barrels on atop of Napoleon’s affirmative answer. 

“Oleg Grigorievich also does this. He tells me I will end up in Siberia like my father if I do not perform well. I love my country, I will die for my country, but…I do not love him.”

Gaby nods seriously. “Fuck Oleg Gri…gorievich,” she proclaims, pausing in the middle of the patronymic to hiccup. Napoleon snorts, and she elbows him. He winces. 

“Your elbows are sharp. And I already have a bruise,” he complains. 

“Sorry,” Gaby apologizes, mostly sincerely. 

Illya looks at them. He is beginning to think he should not have begun speaking, because now he is not sure that he can stop. 

“I am good at my work. KGB needs me. I am happy to work for my country. But…”

“Go on,” Napoleon encourages, leaning forward. 

“We won’t tell anyone,” Gaby adds. “Nobody tells anyone anything.”

“Except each other.”

“Obviously.”

“I was just making sure!”

“But,” Illya continues, and Napoleon and Gaby turn their attention back to him. “You are nice to me.”

He doesn’t say anything else. His face feels hot and his throat feels tight. For a very long moment all three of them just look at each other. 

And then, as if by design (though neither one of them had spoken to the other), both Gaby and Napoleon get up and grab hold of Illya’s hands. 

“What are you doing?” Illya asks, scarcely moving despite their straining. 

“Come sit with us,” Gaby says. 

“Please?” Napoleon adds. “So we can all be miserable together.”

“We are already together,” Illya points out. 

“Come on, please?” Gaby asks. 

Illya heaves another sigh that has him wincing. “Okay.”

He lets them pull him to his feet. For a second he gets horribly dizzy and he has to close his eyes. When he opens them again, he’s leaning against Napoleon and Gaby has her hands on his back. 

“I’m fine,” he says. “Just dizzy.”

“So’m I,” Gaby agrees. “Come on, let’s sit.”

The three of them stumble back to the couch and sink down onto it rather ungracefully. Napoleon ends up in the middle, with Illya curled into the corner beside him and Gaby lying her head on his leg. 

“I’m glad you ruined my car,” Gaby suddenly says, not moving her head from its pillow. 

“What?” Napoleon asks. “We destroyed it. Beautiful car, too.”

Gaby shrugs as best as she can given her current position. “If you didn’t ruin my car, we would not be here now.”

She does have a point, Napoleon figures. “I’m glad we’re here,” he adds. “Working for the CIA is mostly terrible. Working with you is fun. You’re…” He trails off, unsure of or unwilling to fully voice any further words. 

Illya shifts a little closer to them, carefully. “At home I am part of machine. I do not mind this, but with you I am something else. Not a machine.”

“Just a person,” Gaby says. “More free.”

It’s different for her, she knows. Her career as a spy has been with Waverly alone. The only person controlling her is someone she trusts and likes. 

And yet Napoleon agrees. “Yeah,” he says, slowly. “I mean, Sanders is still in charge of me, but so is Waverly, and with UNCLE I’m not a prisoner of the US government, or at least I don’t feel like one. Maybe one of these days I won’t be, I don’t know. I’d work for UNCLE, with you guys, even if it was my choice, is what I mean, I suppose.”

“I am maybe not so free at home,” Illya chimes in, leaning slightly onto Napoleon. “This is how it is, I don’t mind. It is important that there is an order, things like this. But we…we care about each other, yes?”

It takes Gaby and Napoleon a second to realize that they’re being asked a question here. 

“Of course,” says Napoleon. 

“Obviously,” Gaby agrees. 

“Okay. We care about each other. And maybe so does Waverly. This is different. I am…I have…I can be something else here. And that is good too.”

“Well put,” says Napoleon. “Now, I don’t know about you guys, but I’m feeling a little bit too drunk and a lot bit like I’d like to go to sleep.”

“Me too,” Gaby chimes in. 

“Yes,” agrees Illya. 

“And I’m not moving.”

“Me either.”

“I will stay.”

Napoleon nods slowly, closing his eyes when this makes him too dizzy. “Glad we’re agreed.”

They rearrange themselves as best as they can, which involves a lot of shuffling around, grabbing of arms for support, and general wincing. Eventually, they manage to configure themselves in a reasonably comfortable manner, all stacked and tangled together. 

“Goodnight,” Gaby mumbles, voice muffled by the fabric of Napoleon’s shirt. 

“Night,” Napoleon echoes, already half asleep with his face pressed into a cushion. 

“Goodnight,” Illya concludes, head propped up at a slightly uncomfortable angle against the armrest. 

In the morning, there will be pounding headaches, empty glasses and bottles to clean up, and various injuries to check in on. But for now, there is only silence and comfort. There is only them.

thanks for reading! this was a whole different kind of beast to write but i really loved getting to explore their characters like this, i have so many thoughts about them that don't often get to come through in my usual 'beat them up' fics. i hope you enjoyed this!!

#bad things happen bingo #drowning their sorrows #the man from uncle #illya kuryakin #napoleon solo #gaby teller #drunk #angst #emotional whump #i say things #my writing #i have been wanting to use that lyric as a title for a fic like this for ages im so thrilled it's finally getting out there lol #also i have never written so much drunk conversation before. hope it felt natural-ish. #also also had to make up a patronymic for oleg. felt weird to only call him by his first name but that's all we get in canon ough #back to the title real quick tho #idk i just am obsessed with that lyric and how it relates to them and this idea of like your country not giving a shit about you #and what do you do with that? maybe you say fuck it i love my country even if it doesn't love me back or maybe you say i don't care but #maybe really you still do. or maybe you don't care about it at all. but then what does that mean for you in terms of home? #(it means it's people.) #yeah. sorry. many thoughts. #woah editing tags for the first time. forgot that was a thing you could do on desktop. #ok bye for now love uuuuu

[asexualannoyance]

i very desperately want some good pete angst

#just pete grappling with the reality that now there is sb who Sees him who Knows him #and that vegas will continue to do so and won't let pete fade into the background #(at least not with him) #and also sth sth about how there will always be an angry man in your house if you've been raised by one #and how pete vegas and macau #(even though macau maybe less so but idk) #have grown up with one and how pete sometimes jumps/flinches in certain scenes #yk the one where vegas let's the noodle bowl fall to the ground and pete jumps? #yeah sth to that effect #i just want to read some good good pete angst #you can even make vegas angsty too because he isn't really sure what is going on and shit and doesn't really know how to help #just pete wanting to be Seen but also to disappear into the background bodyguard style #i love angst can you tell lmao #i also love the resolution and comfort but i am very shit at coming up with it #if it involves subspace and maybe cockwarming but like no actual fucking 👀 #if anybody read this far in my tags and has recommendations please give them to me 🥺 #vegaspete #(fun fact: i came up with a whole plot before falling asleep last night so there's that lmao)

[chocoenvy]

god i love piece of shit reader they're so fucking awful i don't feel bad about all the things im putting them through :)

#the urge to give piece of shit reader a tragic backstory go brrrrr #most definitely not based off a song im listening to rn /s #i have no impulse control so if you see me shoving trauma into piece of shit reader no u don't #but consider shoving trauma into Darling's past :] #darling centered angst fic is so niche its not funny but fuck you i love their dumb evil ass #anyways vampire reader and piece of shit reader i love you #and piece of shit vampire reader my beloved <3

[domestikhighway58]

The way this fence locks together gets me every single time I pass it on my commute.

Writing is hard. Life is harder.

Sometimes it all flows like that river you stare at wistfully winding along so freely while you hug its banks, wondering just how cold it has to be to shock you into catatonia if you hit the surface.

Sometimes it wafts in teasing little wisps around your head as you stare at the bleeding orange sky and beg it to come down harder, white it all the way out.

Sometimes it rages around you, uncontrollable--like--like--like you can't fight the earth moving and--

Why bother? Ain't no controlling that seismic activity when it rumbles.

Mostly, you're just tired.

You are just so fucking TIRED.

But you put pen to paper anyway.

Cuz someone has to know.

#hmm #hard times #let me have a fucking tantrum #stupid shit #cm did this to me #fic writer angst #fic #spencer you better show up at the end of cme #give me a thing #commuting #work sucks #poverty

[inrainorshine]

UPSET ABOUT LOKI AND MOBIUS. GOOD EVENING

#lokius #"what the fuck is the loki show #idk if i can stomach two more episodes of loki and sylvies shit #give me lokius #they have actual chemistry for christs sake #this show paired with ofmd is just a god awful angst combination #i wish i enjoyed things like a neurotypical person #my heart has been beating out of my chest all night SOMEONE HUG LOKI PLE A AS E