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samwwise · 3 months

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It's a bit different when it's someone you know.

#good omens #goodomensedit #goodomensgifs #now tell me WHY i never really noticed that shoulder touch before #also this scene is impossible to colour. absolute dogshit #jemmablossom #tusermyra #usereena #userisaiah #rainbowcrowley #usersugar #usermullet #myedits #gif

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journal-from-the-heart · 7 months

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i think, for trauma survivors, especially those who were emotionally abused, invalidated, or gaslit, it is really important not to underestimate the significance of speaking bluntly about what happened to you. Forcing yourself not to beat around the bush, not to downplay what you went through with your words. say what happened, without any caveats, without any “but it could’ve been worse”, “but i might just be being overdramatic”, “but it wasn’t really THAT bad,” and so forth. sit with the discomfort until you can begin to let yourself realize that it WAS that bad, you WERENT being overdramatic, and even if it could’ve been worse you still didn’t deserve it. It’s almost like a form of reclamation, taking back your memories, taking back your life, even the difficult or gross parts, and refusing to let anyone change the narrative or tell you how you should feel anymore, even yourself. and it hurts and it’s scary and it feels weird and awkward and sometimes you want to convince yourself you’re lying, but i think sitting in those weird feelings and letting yourself admit that you really did go through trauma puts the power back in your hands to process things and be compassionate to yourself while you heal

#like. recently i’ve been reflecting a lot on this trauma i have with this absolutely godawful english teacher i had in grade 7 #he was an absolute creep and even though he never touched me i knew he touched other girls and made even creepier comments to them #than he did to me. and i never really had time to fully understand the gravity of the damage he did to me because i was #so focused on the fact that it could’ve been worse and he never even actually touched me or got that close to me save a few times #but yesterday as i was reflecting on this i finally got myself to admit. i was terrified of him and i was terrified for every fucking minute #that i spent in that class. and i was a child who never should’ve had to deal with that and it’s clear that i still have a lot of problems #from that whole event. and the more times i repeat that and get myself to understand it. the more i’m able to be compassionate to myself now #and patient with myself in the things i struggle with as a result of what happened #childhood trauma #trauma #cptsd healing #cptsd recovery #cptsdawareness #trauma survivor #trauma recovery

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squiremaximus · 1 year

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WILLOW | 1.08 “Children of the Wyrm”

#willow #willow ufgood #thraxus boorman #willowedit #fantasyedit #tvedit #disneyedit #smallscreensource #tvarchive #filmtvcentral #mediagifs #userkayluh #.gif #willow spoilers #giffing this was absolute hell but i had to do it for him #now i'm never touching these waterfall scenes again skjnrkjdnfkjn #anyway boorman jumping off a cliff to avoid talking about his feelings? Me #q

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theflyingfeeling · 13 days

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...😭

#i've never had a job in my own field that i've liked as much as i've liked my current one #the semester is ending soon and today i heard my contract will not be renewed bc the person i'm substituting will return to work after all #i've been feeling so tired and a bit poorly after the nokia arena show and i probably should have called in sick today #as i was absolutely useless today #and then after my only class today my students came to me with a gift?? 😭#a pink enamel moomin mug and some chocolate and a paper on which they had written nice things about me + a drawing of a dachshund 😭#and i burst to tears right there in front of them because i was so touched (and also because i'm just really really tired and emotional)#i'm so tired about having to apply for new jobs and having to start all over again #i'm so tired of having to do shitty short-notice substitutions again #i feel like i deserve better than that but on the other hand i fee like life's giving me exactly what i deserve and maybe this is it #i'm dreading the summer because idk if i'll have a job to go to in the autumn #and even if i did find something it won't be like the job i have now #also. it's may day eve and the weather's lovely #and i'm hiding in my apartment with the curtains closed so i won't see all the people going out and having fun with their friends #for me may day eve has never been like that. i've always felt so very excluded from those celebrations #on top of that i got yelled at by a bus driver and i'm the worst friend that ever existed #i'm trying to quit on whining about my sad little life but it gets so lonely #please know i'm not writing this for attention or pity. i know y'all have problems of your own and i'm just being a dramatic crybaby

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kennyomegasweave · 2 months

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As a Zouey hater who stopped liking him hella early on, I actually feel bad for him about how it played out with Nant. I was vindicated with the reveal cause I knew he was NOT the only one clean in this entire story (that's Puen), but at the same time, it wasn't Nant's story to tell about what Jason did to him. Jason needed to be brought down, but I'm not cool with the implication that Nant was in the right to want to reveal Zouey's rape. Especially when Zouey clearly doesn't want that to be publicly known (Nant was the ONLY person who knew). Zouey didn't owe anyone his story. He was already violated in the worst way a human can be violated, so no shit he lost the plot entirely while panicking knowing Nant wanted to publicize what happened as if it was his right to talk about what happened to his actual body.

I'm not excusing the role Zouey played in the kidnapping and the outright lying he did to everyone for months and I will never excuse what he did to Nont the entire time, but I get how Zouey was definitely panicking and in survival mode during this show.

(And technically, Zouey didn't kill Nant nor even really play a part in it. He's responsible for the kidnapping, obviously, but Phop killed Nant when he showed up to say goodbye to Nuth. That had nothing to do with Zouey, unless you count him trying to get Nant out of the country as being the cause, but technically Nant would have needed to get out of the country anyway cause he wanted to turn on Jason for everything, including the drugs, so he would have been on his kill list anyway.)

#playboyy #playboyy the series #I'm a Certified Zouey Hater but I do feel bad for him about all of this #he's a fucking asshole for lying to everyone and getting Nant kidnapped at all #and I won't even touch the absolute psychological warfare he waged on Nont until the absolute end #because fuck him so much for that #but he didn't actually kill Nant #and it wasn't his story to tell about Jason raping Zouey so I mean I get why Zouey freaked #the boy obviously never got any help whatsoever after being raped so he's clearly still in survival mode #I don't know #it's all just so sad now #this show can be summed up by me as a sad lol #regular clyde

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bylertruther · 2 years

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"will shouldn't use a gun in season five because his father probably taught him how to use one and that could be a bad reminder for him" have you considered that will using what was very likely a Bad experience to save his life in what is undoubtedly an even worse experience could be a good thing? have you considered that him using a skill he was forced to learn to save not only himself but (as is likely more important and meaningful to him) the lives of others could give him a sense of usefulness and safety knowing that he isn't defenseless and can stand his and others' ground if need be? especially considering that's a skill that we've only seen hopper and nancy possess, making it that much more valuable and himself more helpful to the group? after everything in s1 and s2, he's probably felt guilty for having endangered them and dozens of other people multiple times, i don't think it'd be out there for him to feel "happy" that he can finally return the favor and protect them for once (especially after having complained about being babied and treated like a doll).

"will doesn't have and shouldn't have powers because that makes him different and he doesn't want to be different" not only are you wrong lol <3 but how have you not noticed that will's entire thing since the very beginning is that he is different and he knows it and while he does get his heart broken over the fact that this means he faces constant unfairness in life, he still refuses to be any other way? will doesn't conform nor does he ever try to even when others try to force or shame him to. he gets frustrated and upset at being treated differently, yes, but he stays true to himself. to battle that feeling he sometimes gets that tells him he's a mistake, a feeling he gets not from his own otherness but from living in a world that Makes it an otherness and thus isolates him for it, he seeks out that which he loves and enjoys and throws himself wholeheartedly at it. will lives his truth and is willing to suffer the consequences for it. he refuses to live in darkness and let it take a hold of him. he holds on to hope and all that makes him feel better for being different. he holds on to art, to dnd, to video games, to his family and his friends, and everything that brings him joy and reminds him that it's okay to be different. in s1 joyce defends will ("he's missing is what he is") and jonathan tells him he shouldn't like things that other people (namely their homophobic dad) try to force him to like, that he should like what he genuinely likes. in s2 jonathan gives will the freak speech and tells him that no one normal ever accomplished anything and mentions bowie. in s3, he doesn't get a speech, (though joyce does tell him that when he falls in love he won't find it gross [avoiding the word girlfriend and leaving it neutral]) but he does face backlash from someone that IS trying to conform and IS shaming will for not letting go of "childish" things aka his interests, what's important to him, and what he wants. does will back down or shy away in shame? no. instead, he lets mike sit in his shame for having said something that hurtful, and he says "yeah. i guess i did. i really did." clearly this is a conversation about what makes will different aka his sexuality bc he goes and destroys castle byers (the safe place he and his brother built once their homophobic dad left which is a place will can be himself unapologetically) with what is likely a bat that lonnie gave him when trying to get him into baseball. he calls himself stupid and donates his dnd books, but i don't see this as an act of conformity (he tells mike as much, suggesting he'll just use his books + if he was ashamed he wouldn't have painted the party as their dnd characters and given it to him of all people lol). he felt stupid because he thought they'd always be crazy together, that they were of the same mind and heart still, and that they had the same brand of "otherness" if you catch my drift. then in s4 we get jonathan's tender "you're my brother and there is nothing absolutely nothing that will ever change that" which is the most direct anyone has ever been about that which makes will different. and he doesn't shy away from it! he doesn't deny it, because we can see from his confession and how he breaks down that he's desperately been wanting and needing to hear that. he accepts that love and allows himself to be held and seen by someone else, as he has every other time. because will doesn't hate being different, he just hates that he has to live in a world where that's seen as wrong and thus makes him feel like he doesn't belong because of it. but he doesn't change himself. he doesn't feel ashamed of it. he doesn't see it as a flaw in himself or others and he never has. will is different and he knows it and he wouldn't have it any other way.

will's story since the beginning has been about being different and going through awful things, and managing to not only find the light in it but also make it out stronger because of it all. it's always been about using what makes him different as a good thing and as something he uses to save himself and others.

will being good with a gun bought him time with whatever kidnapped him. will knowing how to run and hide kept him alive in the upside down. will acted as a spy while possessed and managed not only to save hopper but also tell them how to finish this. will's experiences and senses helped them figure out what was happening in season three. will's love and loyalty inspires mike and manages to bring him to a better place even if just for a moment in the van, and again he's the one that knows vecna's current state, aaaand had he been in hawkins at the time it likely would've gone a lot better because as dustin said "we need will".

taking something awful and turning it into a good thing and a source of strength is a wonderful trope. it's inspiring and empowering not only for the character but for those that could use that hope and reminder that there's always a silver lining, that life isn't all darkness and shadows and hurt. not only that, but it's something that they've literally always done for will since the very beginning. he is the prime character for that. his entire message has always been that it's okay to be different and that you can find strength and peace in that; that the things that make you different aren't a detriment, they're precisely what make you strong. like... i'm sorry, but have you not been paying attention at all whatsoever this entire time or... :/

#some of u heard 'sometimes it makes you feel like a mistake' and just forgot every other season ever it seems like #but idk maybe IM the outlier here lmao #characters like mike steve and eleven i can see the conformity argument for #BUT WILL?!?!?!?#will who has always drawn and listened to his music and wanted to hang out with his friends and play dnd and who #gets made fun of for so many things even by those that mean the world to him but has never ONCE tried to change #anything about who he is over that..... THAT'S who you think thinks being different is a bad thing!?!?!#will who has never lied about being a loner or what he likes or what he wants in life or has dressed like other people want him to #will who specifically has received multiple It's Okay To Be Different speeches and came out of them believing them is the character #that you think hates being different? will who loves mike's nerdy self and thinks the absolute world of him and TELLS HIM AS MUCH AND #CONFESSES HIS GAY LOVE TO DESPITE THE SUMMER OF HOMOPHOBIA AND THE AIRPORT FIASCO AND THAT DREW A #FUCKING HEART ON HIS SHIELD UNABASHEDLY AND CONFESSED IN FRONT OF TWO OTHER PEOPLE TOO ON TOP OF THAT #IN THE EIGHTIES!!!!!!! TO MIKE!!!! WHO COULDNT TOUCH HIM AND HAS A CONSERVATIVE FAMILY AND DIDNT TALK TO HIM FOR A YEAR #IS WHO YOU THINK HATES BEING DIFFERENT . HELLO #literally everything that he goes through is turned into something 'good' because that's the POINT!!!!#HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE NORMAL!!! HE IS NOT THE CHARACTER U SHOULD BE MAKING THOSE ARGUMENTS FOR LMAO #jus say u don't want him to have powers bro don't be lying on my blorbito's name like that 😭😭😭😭😭#anyway. crazed frenzy is over im normal now <3 #u kno how the long and all too passionate bordering on Is This Bitch Okay mobile posts go #back to being offline now byeeeee 🏃‍♀️

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backpackingspace · 7 months

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thinking about that post that was "all hannibal thought (on the way down from the cliff) was that he was holding the man he loved. With that in mind:

Hannibal would give up anything if will start holding his hand

#Hannibal #Nbc hannibal #Like does hannibal want will to murder with him absolutely #But would between will hugging him regularly Mayne petting his hair a little and murder the affection wins out #The pipe line between this is a fun new plaything and I desperately love him was a steep quick slope for hannibal #hannibal lecter #will graham #hannigram #Will I didn't fucking ask for this but I guess this is my life now #Okay but hannibal just clining to will while wills at work #Jack so uh what's going on with all this #Will 100% serious if I stop touching him he's going to murder everyone I care about #Jack thinking it's another dark hunor thing never pegged you as the possessive type Dr. Lecturer

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running-in-the-dark · 3 months

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it's so funny when I rewatch a show but with a new/different/additional crush. like I'm rewatching the librarians with my partner right now and it just feels soo different lol

#anyway. Jenkins 😍#on a completely unrelated note...#I need to learn more about pocket squares and ties.#because it's already driving me insane when they don't go together on night court but it's much worse on the librarians where I can actually #like. see stuff lol #I don't mean 'oh no the colour isn't an exact match'. more like 'these patterns and/or colours look fucking bad together'#but maybe there's like. reasons for that. rules that my silly little brain isn't smart enough to figure out #because all I'm basing that on is. my eyes and my opinion lol #anyway he's so baby. 🥰 and I definitely like him better now. very very huggable.#he takes that suit jacket off and I'm like 🥵#man I feel so weird about this :') but I must talk about it anyway or I will never get over that :)#like it just feels like. ohh this is weird I'm not supposed to think he's hot because he's old 😬 but he just. is 🤷#anyway touching his ears would fix me man it totally would #*with my mouth also. but whatever it's cool I'm not thinking about that #no haha why would I be thinking about it that :)#or when he sits on that table sometimes and I totally don't think about how I absolutely need to sit in his lap :)#haha noo I'm not thinking about fucking him at all who even brought that up #anyway i am very tired & have already taken my sleep meds so I am extra stupid rn :) and the dumb thoughts just keep coming out

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arklay · 11 months

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MR. & MRS. WESKER 🤍

i was able to commission the lovely @rcehb-art on twitter for this piece of diana and wesker during their strange after-the-fact reception for their very private wedding. i am just so in love with this and how it turned out, and i can't thank rc enough !! she is so kind and amazing to work with and i can't recommend her enough if you're looking to commission artwork ♡

#commissions.#oc: diana #pair: ewskers #or should i say drs. albert & diana wesker 🖤#i literally haven't stopped staring at this since receiving the final product !! & just the whole process was so much fun & i loved seeing #it all come together 🥺 i'm just aaaaaa i adore this sm !!! also okay i think i have talked about this on here before but these two didn't #actually have like a ''wedding'' but they eloped then a bit after that alex & the birkins found out they had gotten married without telling #anyone (they knew they were engaged but yeah there were no wedding talks so to speak) so then they sort of pushed them to have some sort of #reception at least & celebrate things kinda...like they thought he would've made a big deal out of things but these two aren't all that #fussed with the idea of weddings or marriage in general (there's a lot of lore here i swear. especially on diana's part like some of you #know) so they were very private about it all !! but yes here you can see them gossiping & talking shit about umbrella employees 🤭#also this goes without saying but pls don't use or touch this at all as it's a commission & diana is my oc !! i didn't think i would need to #say that but precautions now after things that have happened on here & unfortunately made me less active...diana is very very special to me #so yeah :] and ofc never repost art that isn't yours !! that being said please go & support rc !!! she's amazing & all of her art is so so #gorgeous & she's just the absolute sweetest & a beloved mutual of mine 🤍🤍

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charlesemersonwinchesteriii · 1 year

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Medical log, stardate 18935.15. Once more have I seen the tailor go out in his lizard fashion—

#least funny way to make this joke BUT. look how much thought I put into that stardate!#Star Trek: Deep Space 9 #it would be so much easier to listen to the new audiodrama podcast of drac daily instead of reading but unfortunately #our dear solicitor will forever sound exactly like our dear doctor to me now because somehow it has become Hot Reptile Summer in my brain #and everything is melting together like changeling soup. and this is BEFORE the gomens s2 premiere. christ.#Dracula: How dare you touch him!! This man belongs to me!! I too can love!!!#me reading All That: omg just like in all my favorite ''Garak saves Julian from other Cardassians'' fanfics :3 #god I love how as far as I know there's literally nothing in canon to support any of our weird kinky #''claiming a mate by leaving a bite mark scar on their neck'' or any of that other fanon stuff for Cardassians #it's not like with the Klingon dicks or Vulcan pon farr. anybody could make up absolutely anything about Cardassians #and every single writer I've ever read has chosen shit like mating bites scent marking egg laying #and of course. glowing blue WAP with a built in strap. I fucking love you Deep Space 9 fandom there will never be another like you!!!!!!#Starky's Original Posts #Dracula Daily #COMPUTER. ERASE LOG.

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sexynetra · 7 months

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rachel !!!!!

post a line/snippet where the characters touch each other (in any way you wanna take that <3)

Hi darling Gi <333 thank you for the challenge of the day, I have decided to gift you 2 (two) forms of touching!

First, we have emotionally touched:

~~~

“Okay, yeah, but you don’t owe me a gift for it.”

“I know. I just want to,” Crystal smiled and Gigi’s heart fluttered.

“Are you sure I can’t see it? I’m not going to love it any less if I see it before it’s done. In fact, I might even love it more,” Gigi angled again.

Crystal was quiet a moment, and Gigi tried not to stare at the way Crystal’s tongue darted over her lips. “It's frankly unfair how hard it is to say no to you,” Crystal griped after a moment, stepping out of frame to grab something.

Gigi took the moment of privacy to try and still her racing heart. It was a painting, not a declaration of love. Crystal had made paintings for most of their friend group for various celebrations. This was nothing new or special. Still, Gigi felt like she couldn’t breathe when Crystal returned, gripping tightly to a small canvas.

~~~

And then we have some physical touching :)

~~~

Without her noticing, an hour had passed and Anetra, flopping onto the bed after messing up a trick with smoke rings, had moved so her head was resting in Marcia’s lap. Marcia absentmindedly played with the waves of Anetra’s hair. She looked so soft laying across her lap; nothing like the intimidating force of a woman she was when she was angry, or the stoic statue who wouldn’t show any emotion or vulnerability. This was the Anetra that Marcia had gotten glimpses of here and there, when Anetra was drawing, or spending time with Sasha, or after the Halloween party.

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binders-and-beanies · 1 month

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Doin bad again folx

#might delete later I’m just wide awake and miserable #summer bill came out today and it’s $7100 not including housing which will be $2400 #literally dunno how im gonna pay for that and my dad is. adding to the emotional turmoil of it all #not able to get a loan at least not before the bill is due #able to get aid luckily but again who knows when or how much #my bday is tomorrow and for months I’ve been like please just let my bday be a good day i need one #i need some hope. not that I haven’t had good experiences lately bc I have. but nothing that lasts #nothing i get to feel good about for more than a day before a new problem drops #I need to enjoy my birthday without feeling this deep dark dread and fear and fucking guilt and hopelessness #I have fun plans for today And tomorrow and I’m grateful but honestly stressed about that too #bc it’s gonna be a lot + bc of all I need to do outside of that #+ I don’t get to spend my bday w friends the way I want like I have one friend Maybe coming w me #my bday is supposed to feel celebratory and instead it feels like absolutely forcing some illusion of choice or joy in my life #on top of it all. the most peaceful I usually ever feel is in bed w my partner and now my body won’t even let me hold or be held by them #currently laying next to them not touching them so I at least don’t keep them up w how physically miserable I am rn #I’m literally always physically miserable at this point and it feels like spring is never gonna come and provide any relief #but it’s like can I at least be cozy w them. nope instead I’m wide awake facing various horrors #despite being permanently exhausted and falling asleep in class after 40 ounces of coffee #Im just. so fucking unhappy in life rn dude I don’t want life to be like this forever with the constant threat of it getting much worse #fucking shred of joy in this godforsaken world: the sleep noises they r making rn #mine #txt #vent post #suicidal ideation tw #<- cry for help

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izzy-b-hands · 7 months

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im ngl i had a lil breakdown before my shower (which i took just before i went to bed to chill and watch the new eps) abt some thought-id-already-worked-all-thru-it irl stuff that resurfaced on me like trauma tends to and i just

it made everything in the show so. I don't know how to say it right. but i feel seen and understood and emotionally overwhelmed in a safe yet weird way, just like i did with a lot of s1 and I am Feeling So Much akdnfkgb (i cannot stress enough that this is a Good Thing and I'm absolutely thrilled and happy with the new eps and like. Going to be fine mentally I just gotta wrangle this like i have the times before.)