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crazyk-imagine · 2 years

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We Used to Be

Pairings: Benedict Bridgerton/ Female reader

Characters: Reader (last name Whittaker), reader’s mama, Bo (reader’s horse), Benedict Bridgerton, Daphne Basset neé Bridgerton , Eloise Bridgerton, Francesca Bridgerton, Gregory Bridgerton, Hyacinth Bridgerton, Anthony Bridgerton, Colin Bridgerton, Violet Bridgerton, Kate Bridgerton neé Sharma, Simon Basset, reader’s deceased papa (mentioned), Archibald (Bridgerton’s butler), Nigel (reader’s head servant), Maggie (reader’s maid), Lord Albert Ruttiledge (Rut-til-ledge), Lord Fauwix (Foe [like doe]-wick-sss)

Warnings: Fluff, angst, drama (I can’t help it), certain Bridgerton’s plus spouses are salty bitches, they care about you too much to let anything happen to you :), Benedict denies the truth about what he did, reader and Benedict are love blind idiots, Reader is a bit stubborn, cute nicknames (my dear, my muse, Ben, Benny)

Word Count: 11,573

Answers to WUTB

I'm a sucker for making my Bridgerton imagines dramatic [Lady Whistledown ain't got nothing on me XD jk, it's the other way around ;)]

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Another season, another ball, another Lady Whistledown paper sold.

Only this time, you and your family seem to be the talk of the ton.

Why? One would ask, it could have something to do with the fact that you had left years ago and only returned just recently, something many have different ideas on (naturally).

You and your mama have returned to the home, town, and ton you love so much… at least, you did but that was a while ago.

Times have changed, as have the people.

After settling into your childhood home and preparing your room for the evening, you relax and enjoy your slumber before you begin your adventure.

The first (and only) destination you have in mind is the most obvious (to your mama and staff) the Bridgerton home, or more specifically, Aubrey Hall.

Before you begin with your adventure, you let your mama know that it’s alright if she takes the carriage for the day while you ride your most prized pet, your horse Bo.

You’ve done your very best to take care of the beautiful creature seeing as he was the first thing your papa had given you when were just ten and three, with you now being twenty and three it seems as though time is passing by so fast, too fast for your comfort.

Bo reminds you of your father every time you see him, and you wish for nothing to happen to him.

It’s hard enough to not see and hear your papa around your home but, if anything happened to Bo… you wouldn’t be able to bare it.

The servants in charge of taking care of the two other horses your family owns have stopped trying to persuade you into allowing them to do their job; it became a hassle to ask you after a while and they don’t want to cause anyone any trouble.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay with Bo, today? I can take-” But still they try, and it warms your semi-warm heart so.

You place your hand on top of your mama’s, drawing her attention back onto you, “Mama, you know I love you but, please, stop talking such nonsense. I’ll be fine. Bo and I can go for a ride without anything happening. We’ll be fine. The Bridgerton’s aren’t that far from here. It’s a delightful sunny afternoon and you should enjoy yourself and rekindle your friendship with a few of the ladies in town.”

Your mama knows how stubborn you can be seeing as you got it from your papa (and herself, although she would never admit it). “We both know the only ones willing to talk to us were and always will be the Bridgerton’s.”

“Yes, yes and it will be fine. You take the carriage. It’s time for me and Bo to go out and stretch our legs. This is going to be a good morning for the both of us.”

Your mama sighs, “fine, fine. Promise me one thing.”

“Yes?”

“You’ll be careful.”

“Of course.”

“I love you,” she lets out a tearful chuckle, reaching for your cheek. “My beautiful girl has grown into someone I am most proud to call my child.”

You smile and roll your eyes, “mama!”

“Alright, off you go. But be back before it gets dark! And if you decide to stay, send a letter!”

“I don’t see the reason for you to raise your voice, I’m still nearby,” you say, barely exiting the hallway.

“Oh. I thought you had run off, child.”

“I am now. Bye mama!” You wave, taking off.

“Have fun my dear.”

You gallop into the front of Aubrey Hall, hoping that you don’t have to search for the family you’ve been wanting to visit for the past four months.

You had talked your parents about coming down for Anthony and Kate’s wedding but then yours and your mamas’ lives took a turn; a few weeks before the wedding, your papa died.

“Does no one else hear that?” Eloise lowers her book from her eyesight, glancing around the room, studying everyone’s expressions.

“What?” Benedict looks up from his sketch book.

“The horse. Outside. Can someone go to the window and see who it is?”

“Why can’t you do it?” Francesca asks.

“Because I have more interesting things to do,” replies Eloise.

“I’ll see who it is,” Daphne pushes herself off the piano stool, walking towards the window. She stares for a moment, focusing on the familiar horse and his rider.

As soon as you lower your hood, checking out the home, she runs out of the room, speeding down the halls, and out of the house before the others can ask a thing.

You turn around, ready to go to the nearest town when a door opens and heels clacking against the stairs outside alert you of a female’s presence.

You jump down off Bo, as soon as your heels touch the ground, Daphne latches onto you. “Daph! Daph! Daphne! You need to let go! I must breathe!” You giggle, holding her by her forearms.

“You truly cannot expect me to remain calm when my dearest friend has come to visit.”

“I was hoping you would be slightly calmer than you are now,” you joke.

The smile never falls from her face as she continues, “come in, come in. We can have tea until the ball- the ball! Are you going to the Cowper’s ball this evening?”

“Well, I suppose I am now.”

“Good. Now, follow me. I’ll see to it that one of the servants can take care of Bo and then we can-”

“No!”

Daphne jumps, not expecting you to shout. “Is something wrong?”

“I would- I would,” you take a deep breath. ‘Breath.’ “I would feel more comfortable if I were the one to bring Bo to the stable’s or at least see him make his way there… if that’s alright.”

“Of course, it is. Give me one moment, I’ll be right back.”

The few siblings in the room Daphne had disappeared from, find themselves looking out the window to see what’s caused their sister to run out of the house like a mad man.

“Oh, she’s returned home?” Eloise comments.

“Who is that?” Gregory asks.

“Daphne’s friend and Benedict’s not so secret crush.”

“Yeah- what? No, Eloise, that’s not funny,” Benedict says.

“It’s cute, you think I’m joking. We’ve all seen the way you look at her, brother. “The same way I look at a muse” or however Anthony phrased it.”

“When did you and Anthony talk? No, better question. Why did you and Anthony talk about me and Lady Whittaker?”

“Oh, it wasn’t exactly about you two. We were merely talking about how you should be finding yourself a wife soon since he and Daphne are married. They don’t want you to die alone.”

“Anthony didn’t say that.”

“How would you know?”

“While you two continue to fight, Gregory, Hyacinth, and I are going to join Daphne and her friend,” Francesca interrupts.

The two don’t pay much attention to the three leaving the room.

“Why were you two talking about us?”

“Mama and Anthony got a letter from Lady Whittaker and of course, I walked by at the right time…”

Benedict raises a brow.

“Alright, I was in here reading, hiding from Gregory and Hyacinth before they walked in here and started talking about the letter. Then mama went on about how she always wished for you and Lady Whittaker to wed ever since you were children or something. The conversation started to get boring, so I left the room.”

Benedict sighs, exiting the room.

“Was it something I said?” Eloise shouts. She smirks, already knowing that something will happen between the two of you (with or without her assistance- to which she would deny ever helping, if she’s ever asked).

“I thought you didn’t like meddling with people’s love lives?” Violet asks.

“I don’t.”

Violet’s smile drops from her face giving her daughter a pointed look.

“It’s not meddling if I’m helping my dear brother.”

“Mm-mmm.”

“You were going to do the same thing as I did.”

“Maybe, but I would have been more subtle.”

“I can be subtle.”

“No, my dearest, you cannot.”

“Francesca, Gregory, and Hyacinth, hello all,” you greet the three with a smile.

The eldest girl out of the three runs towards you, hugging the life out of you. “I have missed you.”

“And I you, little Frannie.”

She groans, “I told you to stop calling me that.”

“It’s a cute nickname.”

“It’s embarrassing.”

“I disagree.”

“Me too,” Gregory and Hyacinth add.

“I leave for a mere few seconds, and you’ve already found a new group of people to talk to,” Daphne teases.

“Of course, I am the favorite around here. I am to share my social skills with you all. Who else would stick around long enough to talk to me?”

“He would,” Eloise chimes in, pointing to Benedict.

You look up and find… him, standing there, watching you with that same so-called innocent expression he always has whenever you’ve looked at him. You blink owlishly, unable to comprehend that he’s here, standing a distance away. This time it’s not a figment of your imagination.

“I… we can…”

You turn to focus on Daphne and really listen to what she has to say, this time. “I’m sorry?”

“As I was saying, we can take Bo to the stable ourselves. There should be someone there since Anthony and his bride Kate, went riding before you arrived,” Daphne explains to you once more.

You nod, unable to say anything at this time, the words seem to be lodged in your throat and you decide it’s best to say nothing; save yourself from any further embarrassment.

“Follow me,” Daphne intertwines her arm with yours, leading you away from the chaos that is sure to happen soon. She wishes to be ahead of it while she can.

“Are you alright?” The eldest daughter asks you.

“I’m,” you hesitate, unable to find the right word. “Fine.”

“You don’t sound so sure.”

You sigh, “I know.”

“May I ask why you’ve returned home?”

“It seems as though you already have. One part of me wishes to say it was time and the other part of me wants to reveal the truth to you.”

“Is something wrong?”

“My papa’s funeral is to be sometime this week.”

She stiffens, unable to reply.

“I know, it came as much of a shock to us as it does to you now. You don’t have to say anything, I understand. I do.”

The two of you are quiet as you continue your journey towards the stables, until…

“Don’t forget about us!” cries out Gregory, Hyacinth and Francesca close behind him.

“I beat you! HA!”

“Don’t be mean Gregory,” you say.

“But I did. I was the first one here.”

“Don’t whine,” Hyacinth chastises.

“You are lucky you don’t have to live with them anymore,” you whisper to Daphne. You had forgotten how easily the youngest would begin an argument over the silliest or simplest things.

“I am, aren’t I.”

“Very.”

“We are still here,” Eloise interrupts.

“You weren’t with these three,” you point to the youngest siblings.

“When they ran over, you somehow snuck away from,” you gulp. “Benedict and followed us.”

“I… cannot deny what you know.”

“Eloise Bridgerton has no rebuttal, I must say I am surprised,” Daphne teases.

“Let’s not make a big deal out of this. Ah, look. Here we are,” Eloise extends her arm, dramatically showing the stable door.

One of the few stable boys working, exits and takes Bo form you, promising to take care of him.

You thank the kind employee before the siblings take you away, guiding you to their home.

“What if we play a game?” Hyacinth suggests.

“A game?” asks Francesca.

“I don’t know,” Daphne says, a bit apprehensive.

“Why?” Hyacinth asks.

“We are to get ready for the Cowper ball soon. Mama would not like to see us with grass stains on our clothes,” Daphne adds.

“I suppose you are right but, what if we don’t play whatever game Hyacinth wants to play-”

“Hey!”

“And instead, we play a quick round of pall mall?” Eloise finishes.

“When have you ever finished pall mall game before the day is over?” You ask.

“When we played, we would still be on the round after dinner.”

“Your mama wouldn’t send for you until the next day,” Daphne adds. “

Yes, only because she wanted to have lunch and go for our daily walk.”

“The dreaded walk, you make it seem so boring. It was hardly as bad as you make it seem,” Daphne says.

“Oh, like you were any better. I swear it was like our first-time sneaking,” you glance over your shoulder, observing the four little “ducklings” following you. “A bottle of juice into the library when we were younger.”

“Yes, juice as if we don’t know what you actually mean,” Eloise adds with her normal level of sarcasm. “And look, pall mall is already set up. Let’s play.”

“Did you all plan this in advance?” You ask.

“I didn’t,” says Daphne.

The three youngest siblings give you the same answer as their oldest sister.

You wonder who requested to set up your favorite game.

“Are the newlywed couple going to join us?” You ask.

“Look, who it is.”

‘Guess that answers my question.’ “Anthony, so good to see you,” you bow, adding onto your inside joke with the eldest sibling.

“None of that, we’ve known each other long enough to call each other family,” Anthony wraps an arm around your shoulders, giving you a side hug.

You return the hug, gesturing to Kate when the two of you part. “And you must be the one who managed to capture this rake’s heart.”

“I am not a rake.”

“Not anymore.”

Kate smirks, “why have you never told me about your friend? I quite like her.”

“I take it you will be joining us?” You ask.

“In pall mall?” Anthony clarifies.

“Of course,” you answer him.

“I would be honored, as long as we can talk,” Kate says.

“About Anthony?”

“Who else?”

You two share a smile only the eldest Bridgerton would describe as “evil”.

“Perhaps we should play with partners?” You suggest.

Anthony and Daphne shake their heads.

“Absolutely not,” the former objects.

“For the first time in a long time, I agree with my brother.”

“Is everyone out to get me today?”

“Yes,” you and Kate answer him.

“May I ask you something?” You turn to Kate.

“Of course,” replies Kate.

“Now that the rake is married, does he let you use the “death mallet”?”

“Not usually, I have to get to it first.”

“Of course.”

“I take it, you tried to use it?”

“I did, years ago. I was a child, and do you know what your husband did? He tripped me.”

“You are joking.”

“I most certainly am not.”

“Anthony?”

“Yes?” He turns, facing the two of you.

“How could you trip an innocent girl?”

Anthony’s eyes widen, “you told her?”

“Of course, I told you her. Your wife has a right to know who she lays in bed with.”

“Can we play pall mall now?” Eloise interrupts, sounding bored.

“Is everyone here?” Daphne asks.

“I think so- oh, Benedict! Benedict, do you want to join us?” Hyacinth runs up to the house, tugging on her brother’s arm.

He briefly glances over at you, “I don’t think I should.”

“He’s joining us,” Hyacinth skips back towards you all, tugging on Benedict’s arm, forcing him to come closer.

“I really shouldn’t-”

“You’re playing.”

“Alright, now that everyone’s here, grab your mallet,” Daphne orders.

“When did you get so bossy?” You and Benedict ask. You don’t look at him, but you can feel him staring. ‘Look away.’

“I’m not bossy,” Daphne defends herself.

“That tone suggests otherwise, sister,” Anthony teases.

The duchess rolls her eyes, “on three?”

Everyone agrees.

“One. Two. Three.”

You all reach for a mallet.

Eloise got yellow, Hyacinth got blue, Gregory got white, Francesca got green, Anthony and Kate fought for the “death mallet” (your new bestie won) leaving Anthony with pink (again hehe), Daphne got gray, Benedict got purple, and you got red.

“Look, your mallets match,” Francesca points out.

Everyone of Benedict’s siblings plus Kate and Simon are rooting for the two of you to get married and start a family.

“How so?” You ask, but you already know the answer.

“Benedict’s mallet matches your dress and yours match his vest,” Eloise clarifies.

“It’s merely a coincidence,” you walk away from the group, Kate and Daphne follow.

The former gives the eldest Bridgerton daughter a “what am I missing?” look.

“Who’s going first?” Kate asks, deciding not to put any pressure on you.

“I will.”

“No, me.”

“Why not me?” The young trio begin to bicker.

“Eloise will go first, then Gregory, Hyacinth, and myself; followed by Kate, Francesca, and Anthony, leaving our dear friend and brother to finish,” Daphne offers.

The bickering ends.

“That works,” Eloise lines up her mallet with the ball, successfully hitting it through the first iron hoop. “I’d like to see anyone else make this shot.”

Daphne, Francesca, Kate, and Anthony make it through the first hoop, now it’s your turn.

“She’s not going to make it,” Eloise whispers, attempting to throw you off your game.

“We do not cheat,” Daphne scolds her sister.

Eloise scoffs, “I am not cheating. I am merely making an observation.”

“That is what you call an observation? Whispering while she prepares to take her shot?”

“Yes, is there a problem with that?”

“No, no.”

You straighten your posture, hip jutted out, “are you two done?”

“Of course,” Daphne and Eloise smile.

You squint your eyes at the two, ‘troublesome duo,’ you think. You adjust your stance, pulling the mallet back and swing.

The ball rolls through the first iron hoop without any issues.

“My turn,” Benedict whispers, making you realize how close the two of you are.

Your head snaps up, looking into his eyes, his beautiful… rich… enticing… blue eyes.

His hand slowly inches closer to you, “I need-”

You step away, walking over to the side, observing the few who passed the first hoop begin playing on the next hoop.

Kate leans closer to Daphne, “am I missing something?”

“Yes.”

“Mind explaining?”

“It’s not my place to say.”

“I may have just met her, but I can already tell how much you all care for her. I wish to know more about the one who has captured the hearts of the infamous Bridgerton family. I also believe she has more to tell me about my dear husband.”

“You only wish to find out more about Anthony, have you no shame?” Daphne says with a teasing smile.

“I want to get to know her and if she happens to tell me things about Anthony then I shall listen. Were her and Benedict-”

“No.”

“Really?”

“They both have feelings for one another but were never able to confess…”

“Did something happen?”

“I’m not sure.”

“What do you know?”

“She and Benedict were fine and then they weren’t.”

“You don’t know what happened?”

“Neither would talk about it.”

“Hmm.”

“I don’t like that look.”

“What look?” Kate feigns innocence.

“Please, don’t do try to help them. I tried and it didn’t end well.”

“That’s where we differ.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve looked out for Edwina in the past and she managed to find herself- find who she’s meant to be. Maybe I can help them realize what’s right in front of them.”

“Do you need a partner?”

“Now, you want to help?”

“All I want is for my brother and friend to be happy.”

“Then we’re in agreement.”

“It seems we are.”

“I’m winning,” Eloise gloats.

“Not for long,” Francesca tells her.

“This isn’t fair.”

“What? The fact that everyone is slowly catching up to you,” you point out.

She scoffs, “no.”

“Yes,” you, Gregory, Francesca, Hyacinth, and Anthony reply.

“There’s no need to add on.” “But it’s more fun to tease you,” you smile at Eloise.

“Shall we use our turns to take out two specific players?” Kate asks her sister-in-law.

“That sounds like a good idea.”

“I know, that’s why I thought about it.”

“Now, you’re being cocky.”

“It looks as though we’ve slowly begun to break off into pairs,” he whispers in your ear.

You brush him off, not in the mood to talk to him. “I’d say it was on purpose.”

“You do speak. Here I was beginning to think maybe you didn’t want to talk to me, but that’s not true, right?”

“I have hardly anything to say to you.”

“Why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”

“I no longer wish to speak with you.”

Kate and Daphne briskly walk towards the two of you. “I’m sorry! It appears you both will have to search through the bushes and play from there,” Daphne informs you.

Kate nods with pursed lips.

You shake your head while turning around, “of course, we do.”

“I’ll just-” Benedict cuts himself off before walking in the same direction as you.

You can’t stand to be here any longer as you rush to find your ball before you lose more sunlight and have less time to prepare for the ball.

“I don’t think you’re going to find your ball there.”

“Where do you think I’m going to find it then, Ben?” You squeeze your eyes shut at the use of his old nickname.

“I feel as though I’ve done something wrong.”

You spin around, angrily pointing your finger at him, “you feel as though you’ve done something wrong?”

“I still don’t quite understand why you’re using that tone.”

You close your eyes, raising your hands up, admitting defeat. “I can’t do this right now.”

“Do what? You’ve barely said a word to me since you’ve arrived, and you act as if I am the very vermin that runs around certain streets. Please,” he reaches for you, cradling your hand in his. “Explain to me how I can fix this- fix us. We used to be so close, I always thought…”

You gulp, “thought what, Benedict?”

“Nothing,” he shakes his head. “Never mind.”

Your vision blurs as tears pool in your waterline, threatening to fall. You sniff, his head snaps up, his expression falls; unable to see you in such a depressive state, he brings his hand up to wipe away your tears but, you pull away.

You pace in front of him, arms wrapped around your waist to protect yourself. “I truly can’t believe you could be so- so- so,” you grit your teeth, attempting to figure out the right word to use but find that this works too. “Idiotic. How could you be so idiotic Benedict?!”

“Me!?”

“Yes, you. I don’t see another Benedict running around, running amuck in my life.”

“Running- how could I be running when I have no idea as to what you’re talking about?! Please, tell me.”

“You honestly don’t remember how you humiliated me in front of your family?”

“I humiliated you?” He asks with a softer tone.

“Yes.”

“What happened?”

“You broke my trust and eliminated whatever bond we used to have.”

“I would have never done that,” he argues.

“I’m sure you didn’t, seeing as you were never that kind of person, but you did, and it almost ruined a business deal for my papa.”

“Is this about-”

“Yes! Yes! It’s about the fact that you purposefully ruined a potential future engagement for me. It appears you do remember after all.”

Benedict’s eyes rise in surprise, and he had the audacity to laugh… in your face. Now, he wasn’t laughing at you, not even close; he found the whole situation very amusing.

“I’m glad to see that you still find this funny,” you stomp away, tripping over something hard, it could have been a rock or an old, rotted tree branch that fell on the ground; you didn’t know. You were lucky to catch yourself on the nearest tree. You hiss as you push yourself up and away from the tree.

Benedict takes your hand in his, checking over you before you could do so yourself (how he got to you so fast, you’ll never know).

“Are you alright?” His eyes are on you; you can feel it.

A blush creeps upon your cheeks before you know it and perhaps, out of embarrassment, you attempt to snatch your hand away from him. And, of course, you’re unsuccessful.

“Stop wiggling.”

“I am not wiggling,” you argue.

“Well, you’re not helping yourself right now.”

“Rude.” You stare up at him with a pout.

The corner of his mouth tugs upward, “I don’t know if I’ve said this before but, I will now and I must admit that I’ve missed this.”

“Missed what?” You hiss, your arm jerks.

“Shh, I’m sorry, that was on me.”

“All of this is on you,” you mutter under your breath.

“What did you say?”

“Nothing.”

“Still can’t seem to avoid trouble?”

You scoff, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Clearly.”

You huff, rolling your eyes, “can you let go and hit your ball so we can get out of here?”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“I am tired of your games and the way you brush off certain subjects. If you are here to joke and point fingers, please, at least have the decency to find someone else because I. Am. Done.” You manage to escape his grasp and hit your ball, watching it roll, creating a path in the dirt.

“Are you two done? You must make haste!” Eloise shouts.

“Wait- wait,” his hand clamps around your wrist. “Don’t leave.”

“We have played long enough and are losing sunlight as we speak. If we do not hurry back to the others, we will make everyone late for the Cowper’s ball.”

“Since when did you care about going to such events? You never were the kind of girl to do so before.”

“I was a naive girl who thought she had found a good friend and lost a potential-”

“Future suitor, yes, I know. But I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal now.”

“I have lost my papa recently and sooner or later the ton- or whoever else is going to come knocking on our door and kick us out because we don’t have the sufficient funds, we need in order to survive.”

“Oh.”

“Yes, oh. I am going to be a part of this season and I would like to be on time so, I may discuss such things with my mama.”

“Season?” He whispers to himself.

You’re too far away to hear his heart break, like the way yours had that night.

“Finally,” Eloise fakes a sigh of relief and worry.

“As charming as ever Ellie,” you smile.

She loses whatever happiness was on her face, “I told you not to call me that.”

“You have but, I enjoy the nickname and I happen to think it’s cute, as I’m sure your family does.”

“Good for them, I don’t. I like my name, please use it.”

You exaggerate your sigh for dramatic effect, “okay, I won’t call you by your nickname if you don’t want me to.”

“Thank you.”

“Children,” Violet calls out.

“It’s time to get ready.”

“Coming, mama,” said a few of the Bridgerton’s.

“Yes, mama,” the others reply.

Daphne and Kate interlock their arms with yours, “you can get ready with us.”

“Oh. Okay, I wasn’t expecting this.”

“We ladies must stick together, don’t we? I mean you are practically family,” Kate says.

“I suppose so?”

“I have a hunch you’ll become a member of the family before the end of the season.”

“What do you mean?”

She and Daphne smile.

“You’ll see,” Daphne adds.

“Are we all ready?” Violet asks, glancing over everyone, making sure everyone looks proper. Some nod, others answer her with a yes. She turns to you, “you can ride with-”

“Us!” Benedict interrupts his mother.

“She couldn’t ride with all you boys.”

“Why not?”

“I can switch with Colin,” chimes in Eloise.

“Why me?” Asks Colin.

“She clearly needs someone she can talk to about,” she pauses to think of a good enough excuse to make him quiet. “How hard it is being a woman in this world- cruel world.” Her plan worked well in her favor.

“Lady Whittaker and Benedict can ride with us, if they prefer of course,” Kate suggests, slightly elbowing Anthony’s ribs to get him to agree.

“Yes, let’s do that.” Anthony gives his wife a curious side eye glance and she smiles.

“Of course, how could I forget you two would be traveling there on your own,” Violet mutters to herself. “Alright then, you four will ride together,” she points to Anthony, Kate, Benedict, and you. “The youngest and I will be together while Daphne and Eloise ride with Colin.”

“Why do I have to be with Colin?” Eloise whines.

“Come along Eloise before Daphne decides to leave you here,” Colin teases her.

The lot of you finally arrive to the Cowper estate. Your “group” was the last one to arrive with Violet and the youngest being the first then Daphne and her siblings.

Your eyes wander around the room, taking in the decorations and musicians. Although a part of you doesn’t want to admit it, you slightly missed coming to these events but, you didn’t enjoy being asked to dance by pompous, arrogant men (very few did). And yet, being here brings back something you’ve been missing.

You notice that Eloise has disappeared after finding her dear friend Penelope Featherington.

“It seems as though we are alone now,” Benedict comments, hands behind his back as he observes the few lords asking ladies for a dance, signing their dance cards first, of course.

“Not so alone, people are dancing and enjoying themselves.”

“Aren’t we in a fun mood?”

“No, just trying to pass the time until I can get away from you.”

“You wound me,” he places a hand over his heart, feigning hurt.

“I’m only returning the emotional pain you’ve done to me.”

“I didn’t do it on purpose, and you know it,” he says with a serious tone, no longer in a joking mood.

“How could I?”

“Please don’t focus on something that happened in the past. We’re different people than we were then.”

“I think it shows who you really are.”

“You don’t mean that,” his brows draw closer together in hurt.

“Who knows? I mean we’re different people than we were then, right?” You walk away from him unable to stay near him any longer.

Being around him is not good for your health, perhaps a dance or a drink will help… you choose the later.

You find Daphne standing beside one of the few tables containing food and drinks.

After grabbing the glass of champagne, you immediately throw your head back, swallowing the liquid in one gulp.

“It seems as though we are enjoying ourselves tonight,” Daphne comments. She took notice of the brief interaction with her brother and understands- or at least, has some idea on how hard it is for the two of you to talk.

“Yes, enjoying ourselves very much so. Do you think there is a number as to how many glasses you may have before you are kicked out?”

“I don’t know, and I feel like I am going to have to stop you now. I would hate to see you thrown out; you’re wearing such a pretty dress.”

“I’m sure all the lords will want to dance then?”

“Did you and my brother have another conversation?” She asks, knowing full well the two of you did and knows she should stop you before you have too much to drink while you feel upset.

“Is it obvious?” You hope no one asks about your attitude towards her brother.

“To me, yes. To everyone else here, I’m not so sure.”

“At least I can remain unseen by few.”

“Do you plan on dancing with anyone?”

“I didn’t come here for dancing.”

“You can’t attend a ball and not dance.”

“There is no rule that says so and I wish to be my own woman.”

“You’re starting to sound like Eloise.”

“Perhaps she has the right idea about becoming a spinster.”

“What are you two ladies talking about?” Anthony asks, reaching for two glasses, handing one to his wife.

“Nothing,” you quickly respond.

“Seems as though we arrived just in time,” Kate smirks. “Anthony?”

The man in question turns.

“Would you be so kind as to dance with our friend?”

He stutters for an answer.

“There’s really no need,” you tell him.

“You should dance at least once,” Daphne points out.

“I wouldn’t want to give Lady Whistledown any ammunition for her next paper.”

“You wouldn’t,” answers Kate.

“The two of you don’t know that. We also wouldn’t want there to be such a fake scandal being brought to light do we?”

“There would be no scandal. The guests here can clearly see us talking and will see me give you an encouraging nod,” explains Kate.

You take a deep inhale before sighing, “fine. Let’s go.”

Anthony looks slightly uncomfortable.

But, when you think about it, he’s never looked normal or happy to be at these events so, his facial expression is normal.

“One dance,” you add.

“One dance,” the three confirm.

Another song begins to play. “After this you may return to your wife,” you say.

“What if I’m having a good time, dancing with you,” he teases, feeling a little better. It’s not as strange to dance with you, he remembers when you and his sisters would bug him and Benedict to help you with your dancing skills.

“I’m not,” you say with a deadpan expression.

“That’s not something your dance partner wants to hear.”

“Words hurt, don’t they?”

“Benedict, so nice of you to join us,” says Daphne, sipping her drink.

“Tired from your many dances with the eligible young ladies?” Kate asks.

He huffs, “something like that?”

“Or is it that the one person you truly wish to dance with is-”

“Unavailable?” Kate finishes for her.

“I was thinking more along the lines of the person who continues to push him away,” says Daphne.

Benedict hums, a light bulb went off in his head. He thins his lips, the corners tugging upwards into a smile as he stares into the glass filled with a now unappetizing liquid. “You two should try to be more discrete with your gossip.”

“We don’t gossip,” Daphne defends both her and Kate.

“Lying is not a good look on you sister,” he throws his head back and downs the champagne, in a very similar manner to your previous actions.

“You need to stop being so harsh to my brother.”

“Which one?” You’re desperate to end this conversation.

“Don’t play games.”

“I am doing anything but.”

“He didn’t tell us what he did because he thought it would be funny. He did it because-”

“It looks as though he is going to dance with her,” Daphne observes.

“I hope so,” Kate adds.

“Mind if I cut in?” Asks Benedict.

“She’s all yours, brother.”

“Hello, my dear,” he greets you.

The faint scent of champagne is on his breath, oddly enough, you slightly enjoy it… this could be because you’ve also had a glass (or two). “Benedict.”

“Are you still upset with me?”

You scoff, rolling your eyes to make sure you get your point across, “how could I not be?”

The song ends.

You bow, “thank you for the dance but I think it is time that I take my leave.”

“Wait-”

Another song begins, and you use the crowd to your advantage.

After the dancer’s spin around a couple times, Benedict finds himself standing roughly in the same spot he had last seen you. He tries to search for you, but it was hard and the few doors he could enter were very limited.

There wasn’t much else he could do besides wallow in self-pity and temporarily drown himself in alcohol.

You wouldn’t see the family for a few days, taking the time necessary to calm yourself and help your mother prepare things for the funeral and your future (your mama has yet to come to terms with you marrying someone you don’t love).

“Please don’t ask,” you plead with your mama.

“I wasn’t,” she denies.

“You were, and no, I am not currently being courted nor will there be anyone coming to do so anytime soon.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure.”

“What makes you say that?”

“That Benedict boy-”

“No! No. Absolutely not.”

“Sweetheart, he cares for you, and you know it.”

“He only cares about himself,” you hiss.

“If you cannot see what is and has been in front of you this whole time, I’m afraid you may never see it. What makes you so scared about love?”

“Nothing.”

“Now, I know that’s a lie. You have always been transparent when it comes to the topic of these matters but…”

“But nothing. I don’t like him, and he most certainly does not like me.”

Your mama sighs, “fine. Are you going to visit them today?”

“I’m debating on if I should or not.”

‘This may be the last time she sees them before her marriage.’ “I think you should. It would be good for you.”

“How would it be good for me?”

“You would be visiting friends, getting out of this stuffy old house. It could be the last time you see them,” she adds. It appears she’s finally accepted your fate.

You nod, understanding her hidden meaning.

You arrive to find, what you believe is an empty house.

“The others are outside,” Archibald informs you.

You jump, placing a hand over your heart, “oh! Archie, it’s so good to see you. How have you been?”

His expression doesn’t change, he continues to give you a bored look. “They are outside.”

“Don’t you think I wish to speak with you. I miss our talks.”

“By the looks of your dress, you seem to be in a rush to find them. I don’t want to keep you from having a good time.”

You offer him a genuine smile, “you were always so sweet. I wish to speak with you soon!” You run down the hallway, aiming for the back doors of the home.

“Isn’t this a surprise,” says Kate as she walks closer to you.

“Hello,” you rush to say before you take a deep breath so you can catch your breath.

“In a rush, were we?”

“I have no reply.”

“I take it that’s the first time this has happened?”

“Perhaps, you’ll never know.”

"The others and I are playing another game of pall mall; would you care to join us?”

“Another time.”

“Alright, Daphne’s the only one not playing today. You can sit with her.”

“Really? She doesn’t want to try and beat her streak?”

“I suppose not.”

“Look who I found,” Kate taps Daphne’s shoulder.

She turns, “isn’t this a surprise. We weren’t expecting to see you here.”

You avert your gaze, “I know, I know.”

“We’re just happy you’re here. You can sit with me while we watch the others.”

“Okay, where is your mama?”

“I recall her saying she was going to see your mama.”

“I see,” you sit in the empty chair on the other side of the table from where Daphne sits. “You didn’t want to beat or add onto your winning streak?”

“I thought it be best to give the others a chance to catch up.”

“How kind of you.”

Neither of you say anything further; you both enjoy the sounds of the children (none of them are acting their age so, they’re all children to you) as you sip the cup full of freshly poured tea.

You observe the game, watching as Eloise and Collin would brag if their ball made it through the hoop, your eyes shift onto another player.

"I see the way you look at my brother," Daphne lifts her cup, sipping her tea.

You look away from... "I don't know what you mean. You must be mistaken."

"I am anything but."

"Well, then, you must get your eyes checked. I was curious to see who was winning. Nothing else."

"If that's what you wish to believe."

"I don't believe anything; I want to see who is winning so I may prepare my celebratory speech for young Eloise!" You shout the last part, catching the player’s attention.

"I thank you for the support, but it is unnecessary at the moment," Eloise says.

“You’ll be grateful for it when you win.”

“Keep cheering me on them.” You smirk, shaking your head at the overly cocky girl.

“What?”

“Nothing, nothing,” Daphne says.

“I mean it’s only…”

“I don’t want to speak about this anymore.”

“Alright. I promise I won’t bring it up again.” (That promise didn’t last long). “I only mean to say that you and Benedict have had eyes for each other a long time now and I wish to see you two happy.”

“Daphne…”

“I know, I know but, surely you realize the feelings there.”

“And what if I don’t?”

“I only wish for you two to be happy.”

“And I sincerely appreciate that but,” you sigh, returning your gaze to the- game. “Sometimes things just aren’t meant to be.”

“What do you mean? Why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?” Daphne places her cup onto the table.

“I suppose I am.”

“Are you leaving?”

“Soon. I am to marry this season.”

“I didn’t- I didn’t realize you were also joining the season.”

“I didn’t plan on doing so for a while but, things change, and you understand that you have to do what is necessary in order for you and your family to survive in this world. It was planned, there is nothing I can do to change it.”

“If there is anything I can help you with, please tell me.” She reaches for you.

You beat her and grab her hand, pushing her hand onto her lap, squeezing her hand in reassurance, “I am fine.”

“I will help you no matter what, you mean too much to me and my family.”

A smile stretches across your lips and the warm feeling of (temporary) happiness tugs at your heart. “I know and I feel the same for you and your family.”

“Even the stupid ones?”

You laugh, knowing exactly who she’s talking about. “Yes, even them.”

Benedict turns around and sees you glowing, looking radiant as ever.

But there’s something about the way you two look that makes him feel as though his life is about to change for better or for worse and fate has yet to decide.

He would later find out, he was right, and a little wrong.

Benedict turns, looking back over his shoulder like the other faceless guests do.

He watches as the bride walks by; her face covered by a thick veil. He can’t tell who it is. He stands and sits when he’s supposed to.

“I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride,” says the priest.

The unknown groom, lifts her veil and sets it down, letting it fall onto her shoulders.

He can see her face; his smile falls once he realizes that it’s you.

He stands up, trying to reach for you but, he can’t, he’s stuck.

The faceless and nameless man moves closer to you, leaning down to finish the process and make you, his bride.

Benedict wakes, scared out of his mind that he was going to lose you.

He sits in his bed, thinking back to before when things were good between you two. He can’t be in his room anymore, perhaps a cigarette, a walk, or something else would help.

He puts on the shirt he tossed off to the side before he got ready for bed.

He ventures down the hallway, down the stairs, and eventually made his way to the swing set, he and Eloise use for their chats. He sighs, thinking back to the dream.

The thought of you getting married to someone else- seeing you with another is not ideal. He can’t come to terms with it, he didn’t before, and it seems his feelings about the matter will never change.

Getting out of his head, he sees you sitting on one of the swings.

He sighs, staring at you in all your glory, taking a mental picture so that he can draw this beautiful moment as soon as he finds a sketchbook.

The way the moonlight illuminates around you, your hand placement is perfect, not to mention the fact that you’re in your nightgown (not that he’s thought about you in a nightgown or had dreams about you… wearing such an outfit… only for him).

For as long as he shall live, he will never forget the way you look tonight- or any other day. He takes careful steps, to not frighten you but, still does so.

You jump, placing a hand over your heart, “Benedict. I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“I assumed so.”

“Why are you out here?”

“Thinking.”

“About?”

“I don’t believe it would be wise to tell you.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Who knows who you would tell.”

“I didn’t ruin your chance to be with- whoever he was for us to have a broken friendship.”

You’re still hurt by the things he said and don’t hear his minor confession.

He doesn’t realize he’s done the same either.

“You ruined my chance to help out my family.”

“I didn’t.”

“You did.”

“So, what if I did? Is it so bad to say that I didn’t want to lose you, that I didn’t want to see my- my best friend married off to some rake?”

“He wasn’t a rake,” you argue.

“He certainly couldn’t keep his hands to himself.”

“I am a young woman, born into a world where a woman is to marry in order to survive. If a woman is not married by a certain age, then they are named a spinster and are seen as unfit to marry. You do not know and will possibly never understand-”

“I stand by my actions, and I will not take back what I said.”

“So, you admit that you did do something.”

He says nothing.

“Exactly and-”

“Marry me.”

You turn, eyes widen in surprise and shock, “what did you say?”

“What if,” he gulps. “What if you marry me? You know I would take care of you. I would love and support you no matter what, even if it isn’t up to society standards. I would- I would,” he pushes himself off the swing, to kneel before you, holding onto your hands.

Your breath ever so lightly quickens, your heart is about to drop down to your stomach; all you can do is blink owlishly at what, you can only assume a pity proposal and not a confession. ‘If only he meant it.’ “Benedict,” your voice barely above a whisper.

He continues to ramble on about how well of a husband he could be.

“Benedict… Benedict… Benny?” You reach for him, cupping his cheek, bringing his attention onto you. “I am sorry, but I cannot accept your proposal.”

His face falls, he looks so sad, and it does hurt you but, you can’t do this to yourself. “Why? You know I would be a good husband.” Your vision slowly becomes cloudy, tears pool in your waterline; you do your hardest to not let them fall as your lips tug upwards into a sad smile. “I know you would, and I have no doubt that you would but, we cannot marry.”

“I ask again, why?”

“I am already to be courting another before the end of the season, perhaps even before tomorrow evening.”

“When did this happen?” He whispers.

“Before I returned to visit you and your family earlier today, my mama informed me of the promise my papa made before he passed. I am to marry Lord Ruttiledge by the end of this season. I’m sorry.” You lean closer to him, pecking his cheek before removing his hands from you.

You force yourself off the swing as fast as you can before you break down and cry. It takes everything in you not to cry too loudly; you wipe your cheeks and run back to the Bridgerton home.

You close the door lightly so you don’t wake anyone else, leaning your back against the door with your hand over your mouth to hide any sounds that may escape you.

There was hardly any way for you to stay in the house any longer.

You quickly change into the dress you wore a few hours ago along with your hooded cape, careful not to forget your shoes.

You made your way to the stables, luckily it was still dark out and none of the servants were around. Sneaking Bo into his rightful spot and sneaking into your family home was easy.

The hard part was calming yourself down and trying to get some sleep.

After tucking yourself into bed, you close your eyes and wait for sleep to come.

It doesn’t for some time, all you can think of is the conversation you had with your mama earlier.

“You know your father was a good man, right?”

“Yes, why are we speaking of him?” You ask, not wanting to see her cry.

“He made a promise before his passing and- oh dear, I don’t know how to tell you.” She doesn’t want to tell you because she knows who your heart truly belongs to.

“Tell me what?”

“He- he- do you remember Lord Ruttiledge?”

“Papa’s business friend?”

“Yes! Yes, he would often come over when you were a child.”

“Him and papa would drink and go into papa’s study to discuss some things, I don’t know what since they always told me to go play with my friends. It was a little rude if you ask me but, I wasn’t going to question papa.”

“I remember, defiant little thing you were,” your mama smiles.

“During one of Lord Ruttiledge’s visits he and your father made a promise to one another. If you and his son weren’t married by the time you both were twenty and four, you would marry him.”

“What about when I was younger?”

“That was the time before you entered your first season.”

“Papa wasn’t trying to marry me off then?”

“Oh heavens no. He wanted his one and only child to stay young and unmarried for as long as he could, that was the reason why he made the promise. We both hoped you were going to be married by now.”

“Why did papa tell me he was talking to lord Fauwix due to business reasons?”

“He thought you were talking about the Ruttiledge family. He had just finished discussing with young Albert’s father.”

“Oh.”

She reaches for your hand. “Please know that I don’t want this to happen but I’m afraid it’s out of my hands. The Ruttiledge’s have been planning on this marriage for a long time now. I have already tried all that I can to help.”

You sniff, realizing that being so rude to Benedict all this time was pointless. “I know. I don’t blame you- either of you.”

You wipe your cheeks. The life you’ve dreamed of having… is gone.

Eloise manages to sneak up on her brother who slouches in his chair in his art room, “Benedict, how long were you out there for? And, why do you have stains on your clothes?”

She wanted to go outside and sit on the swings but when she saw her brother and you talking, she didn’t want to disturb either of you. She returns to her room, until it was time to wake up.

Benedict says nothing.

“Benedict?”

He looks up at her, tears trickle down his cheek.

She’s shocked, she’s hardly ever seen him cry. “What’s-”

“She is marrying another.”

“Oh…” She doesn’t have to ask who. “When did you find out?”

“Last night… I proposed.”

Her eyes widen, surprised that he would do such a serious thing so soon (even though he’s been in love with you for years). He sits up, leaning forward with his elbows on his thighs, the heels of his palms cover his eyes. “I didn’t plan on proposing, I said it before I realized what I said, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t mean it, because I do. I- I tried to confess to her.”

“You did?”

He runs a hand through his hair before resting his chin in his hand, “I did but, she told declined the proposal and informed me of the potential suitor she is to have before the end of the season. She walked away before I could say anything else.”

“What would you have said?”

“I-”

“Did you think that telling her she’s better suited for you was going to change anything?”

“I don’t-”

“Do you think that it was hard for her to say no to you?”

“It didn’t seem like it,” he mumbles.

“I planned on going to our secret place so we could talk but when I saw you two, I went back to bed, and do you know what I heard?”

He glances over at his sister before staring at the wall once more.

“I heard a young woman in love, with you of all people-”

Benedict frowns at that even though he knows his sister is joking.

“Crying her heart out because she cannot be with who she loves.”

“You all say she cares for me but, I don’t believe it to be true.”

“Maybe if you looked harder, you would see it.”

“We’re going to be having dinner with Albert Ruttiledge this evening,” your mother informs you.

Maggie finishes up with your hair.

“I’ll be sure, I’m ready by then.”

“Are you going to visit the Bridgerton’s today?”

“No.”

“Are you going out today?”

“No.”

“Has something happened?”

“No.”

“Are you upset with me?”

“No, mama. I… I didn’t sleep well. That’s all.”

“Are sure? I’m sure we can-”

“No, we’re having a dinner with the Ruttiledge’s this evening. I’ll be fine.” You turn, placing a hand on Maggie’s wrist, “thank you, Maggie.”

“Of course, my lady,” she bows and takes her leave.

“I’ll be going out today. Will you be alright here? By yourself?”

“I will, have fun,” you peck your mother’s cheek before exiting your room, preferring to hide out in the library.

You didn’t know it but, your mama went to visit the Bridgerton home and discuss a few things with Violet.

“Hello, Lord Ruttiledge,” you greet your soon-to-be fiancé.

“Lady Whittacker.”

“We should all sit down now, I suppose?” Your mother chimes in.

“Yes, of course.” He sits in the chair besides yours.

You and your mama share a “isn’t he charming” look.

Before you can sit down or anyone could say anything else, there’s a knock on the door.

“Who could that be?” You ask out loud.

Your mother places her hands on the arm of the chair, prepared to stand up but stops when the sound of multiple footsteps and chatter echoes in the hallway soon entering the dining room.

It seems as though everyone besides your mama is shocked by the group of guests. “Bridgerton’s! Bassets! Hello, hello. Come in, come in.”

Your mama turns towards the head servant, Nigel. “I’m already on it, Miss.”

“You are a saint, my dear.”

“I wasn’t expecting more guests,” Lord Ruttiledge mutters.

“Neither did I,” you add.

Daphne and Kate make their way towards you.

“We missed you yesterday morning for breakfast. Is everything alright?” Daphne asks.

“Of course,” you answer.

“And who is this?” Asks Kate, gesturing to the now uncomfortable man, who is still sitting.

“A friend,” you answer stiffly.

“A friend?” She repeats.

“Yes.”

“You must be good friends, if you’re here on your own.”

“Please stop,” you mumble.

“I’m only talking to him. I want to get to know him.”

“Kate.”

“Okay, I understand.”

“Everyone, please sit,” your mama announces.

“I’ve got it,” Benedict pulls out the chair from your grasp. He pushes it in once you sit down. “Thank you,” you whisper once he sits down.

“At least some of us have manners.”

“Benedict,” you sternly say.

“I know. I know.”

“How are well this evening?” Violet asks, attempting to make things slightly less awkward.

Few answered with good, others with a longer reply.

The youngest trio broke into a conversation of their own.

The eldest brother and eldest sister along with their spouses kept an eye on the three of you, clearly waiting for something to happen.

Eloise would chime with her commentary whenever one of her siblings would say something that catches her interest.

A few moments later, dinner was served and hardly anyone spoke a word, but when they finished their meals that’s when things took a turn.

“Are you going to discuss your interest in courting Lady Whittaker tonight?” Asks Kate.

Daphne and her sister-in-law gave the lord their full attention.

You close your eyes, deeply exhaling. ‘Why?’ “Must we do this now, ladies?” You ask, clenching your jaw so you don’t start an argument with your friends.

“I want to know what the rake’s intentions are,” Kate answers.

Lord Ruttiledge chokes on the drink, using the napkin to cover his mouth as he coughs. He clears his throat, “what?”

She looks at him, “did you think none of us knew?”

“Knew what?”

“Of your secret lover.”

“Don’t forget secret child,” Anthony adds.

“I think you mean children,” Kate informs her husband.

“I don’t- I don’t know what you two are talking about.”

The two glance at one another and hum, returning their focus back onto him.

“We think you do,” answers Simon, “innocently” sipping his wine.

“Is this why you invited us over?” Violet asks her friend.

“Heavens no. I did not know this is what was going to happen. Although I can’t say I’m upset.”

“You’re not?”

“No, I want her to marry who she wants, marry for love. I think after this we’re going to be closer than ever.”

Violet chuckles, she has the same feeling. “Should we stop them? Your daughter doesn’t seem to be very happy with her friends.”

“It’ll pass, let them get it all out now.”

“How many sips have you had?”

“I think you mean cups.”

“Oh.”

“You see,” Kate begins. “He has at least three children, two girls and a boy with another on the way. Isn’t that right, my lord?”

“His eldest is ten and one, the second child is seven, the third is said to be three, and his beloved has been with child since the middle of winter,” Anthony adds, raising his brows at you as he reaches for his cup.

“How did you find out?”

“We didn’t know for sure but now, you’ve confirmed it all,” Kate smirks.

“You can take your leave at any time this evening,” Daphne tells him.

Simon nods, agreeing with his wife.

“You four are the rudest people I have ever known,” you hiss. “I thank you for “looking out” for me but this,” you point in a circular motion. “Is completely inappropriate. And you,” you turn to the lord. “Can leave. None of us will tell anyone about what has happened. I apologize if you felt as though you had to come here, you certainly didn’t. Our fathers made a joking promise years ago but, then they wanted it to be true and here we are. You may leave. I’ll walk you out.”

The both of you get up, out of your chairs and head for the door.

You grab his forearm.

He turns around.

“Find the mother of your children and marry. Do not wait any longer. It’s clear the two of you care deeply for each other. The children should be with their father more. You won’t regret doing so, I know it.”

He lets out a sigh of relief and lunges at you, hugging you. “Thank you.”

“You have no reason to thank me.”

“I am sorry for putting you through this.”

You offer a small smile, “go to your family.”

“This means more to me than you know.”

“Which is why you must go now,” you laugh, pushing him out the door.

“Thank you!”

You take notice that it’s Maggie who’s closing the door. “Maggie-”

“Don’t abandon the party.”

You huff, turning to see Benedict leaning against the doorway that’s the hallway for the dining room. “Not now, Benedict.” You walk away, aiming for the stairs so, you can go to your room.

“You can’t abandon your guests.” He follows you.

“I have no guests to entertain. I only see a room full of traitors- protective and kind traitors.”

Maggie shakes her, wondering when the two of you will get together.

“At least it wasn’t me this time.”

You stop, doing a one-eighty turn, standing before him. You poke his chest, “so, you admit you did something?”

He nervously chuckles, staring at you, “no.”

“Really?” The corners of your mouth tugs upwards, you don’t realize it until Benedict says something.

“It seems as though now, since you don’t have to worry about marrying that rake-”

Your smile disappears as you take a step back, “he is not a rake. He was doing what he felt he had to for his family.”

“And which family is that? His mother and father or the one he created with some woman?”

You scoff, briskly walking away from him. He’s persistent tonight, you’ll give him that.

“I’m not done talking to you.”

“You’re not. I am,” the door slams shut. You rub your face, keeping your face covered.

“I’m not done talking to you,” he leans against the door, slowly closing it so no one disturbs the two of you or sees you, a young woman in the presence of a single man (who only has eyes for you) and gossip with others so you’re forced to marry… he does plan on asking for your hand but, Benedict would prefer if the both of you weren’t so much “forced” into marrying one another because of such a situation.

“Please get out. I need some time to myself.”

“I’m afraid I cannot do that.”

Your hands fall to your sides, “why? What is so important that you must tell me right this instant? All you’ve done is mess up everything and I can’t take anymore.”

“You…” He stops, unable to say another word. If he admits what’s in his heart, things may never be the same again, for better or for worse. He is tempted to mess with fate but, he’s downright terrified.

“I- what?” You snap, your emotions begin to get the better of you.

Benedict gulps. It’s now or never. He takes a step towards you, reaching out for you almost. He's in front of you, cradling your hands in his like he did the previous night. “You, make it ten times more difficult for me to be able to express myself… I can’t- I can’t tell you- begin to tell you how much you mean to me. I am a man of many talents but, when I look at you, I’m helpless. I can’t tell you everything I feel whenever I see you- think of you. I can hardly put into words how you are my… everything,” he whispers.

He reaches for your delicate face, dragging his index finger across your cheek, tucking it under your chin, bringing you closer. He leans in ever so slightly, his nose brushes against yours as he continues to stare into your beautiful eyes while finishes his confession. “I will admit to you now that I ruined any future relationship you may have had with that lord from our youth.”

You close your eyes, “why?”

“He would have taken away the one thing that keeps my heart beating and my art alive.”

“What?” You open your eyes, seeing his soft and kind eyes. A sight you haven’t seen for quite some time now.

“My darling,” he breathes out. “You are my muse. I may sound selfish but, I would do anything to keep you near me. The thought of you being with another hurts me more than I care to admit.” He brings his hand up to cradle your cheek, “I cannot even begin to think of how terrible life would be without you.”

“Why couldn’t you confess your love for me sooner and spare us this pain?” You sniffle, pulling your head away from him to lightly smacking his chest. He chuckles, reaching for your hand. You follow his lead as the two of you sway back and forth. You pause, “what are we to tell your family and my mama?”

“That we are getting married?” He gives you a sheepish smile.

“Really? I don’t recall anyone asking me.” Benedict kneels, reaching in his pocket.

You laugh, shaking your head with your eyes closed. “Will you-”

“Ben, you don’t need to-” you open your eyes and find him holding a ring. “Where did that come from?”

“Uhh…”

“Have you had this the whole time? Did you plan on proposing before your family interrupted?”

“Technically, our family but, yes? N- I won’t lie to you, my dear. The main reason I came here was to propose to you and tell you of my feelings.”

“You’ve been planning on proposing?”

“I tried once and was unsuccessful.”

“And you wanted to try again?”

“If it meant I got to see you, yes.”

You slowly place your hand in front of him.

“Does this mean you accept?” He asks, his heart beating much faster now… at the thought of you becoming his wife… among other things.

“I wouldn’t offer my hand, if I was going to reject the man I love.”

He practically jumps up, gingerly putting the ring on your finger, holding your hand. He looks at you, “did you tell me you love me?”

Your free hand comes up to the back of his neck; your thumb rubbing gentle and comforting circles, “I’m going to have my hands full with you, aren’t I?”

“I need to hear you say it again.”

You hum, “no.” You walk away, aiming for the door when you feel a pair of hands on your waist turn you around.

Benedict traps you against the door. “I’m afraid you can’t leave the room until you confess your feelings.”

“I,” you pause to study his face. “Find your facial features very interesting.”

“I don’t believe that is a confession.”

You dramatically sigh, “Ben, I… love you. I could not stop thinking about while I was away even though every time I thought of you, I usually became upset. I couldn’t stop my heart from beating faster when I thought of your smile, watching you sketch whatever it was that caught your interest, anything that had to do with you.”

“Even now your heart races?”

“Even now.”

“Do you want to tell them now?”

“I have a feeling they already know.”

“I have no doubt that you are right, my darling.”

One season later (summer)

The sunlight shining through the window begins to bug you.

You roll over, hoping to cuddle with your husband for a few moments. You open your eyes to find him sketching… shirtless. It’s an enjoyable sight to see when you first wake up that’s for sure. “How long have you been awake for?”

“Some time,” he vaguely answers you. You slightly crawl closer to him, leaning on your elbows, hoping to get a peek at what he’s working on today. “And what are we sketching this morning?”

He leans away from you, “no looking.”

You pout, “why?”

“It’s a surprise. I’m- I’ almost done.”

“If you think it’s bad, I can tell you without a doubt that it is amazing.”

He blushes, “thank you, my muse but-” It’s one of those mornings, if he calls you his muse then he’s drawing you.

“But nothing,” you push yourself off your elbows and sit up with one knee bent and the other leg tucked underneath. “You are an amazing artist. I love watching you work on your art and find myself lucky to see the finished work. Let me see it, please?”

He hesitantly hands you his latest sketchbook.

You don’t know what to say so, you smile. “You were drawing me while I slept?”

He hums.

“I must say, I never thought I would look so good in a drawing but when you’re married to the best artist in town, I guess that’s to be expected.”

You return the sketchbook back to him.

“How many times have we redrawn me this morning?”

“Zero.”

“Really?”

“Don’t sound so shocked, when I have an amazingly, wonderful, and beautiful muse lying at my side.”

“Oh? Confident, are we?”

He sets the book on the nightstand and wipes his hand on his charcoal pencil rag before spreading his arms, “come here,” he says.

You cuddle into him, enjoying the warmth he’s emanating. “I wish we could enjoy moments like this more often,” you whisper.

“Who says we can’t?”

A thump, followed by Hyacinth and Gregory’s shouting outside the door.

“Don’t answer my question.”

“I wasn’t,” you tease.

#Bridgerton #bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton x you #benedict bridgerton x female reader #benedict bridgerton #bridgerton x female reader #bridgerton x you #bridgerton imagine #bridgerton imagines #Benedict bridgerton imagines #benedict bridgerton imagine #crazyk-imagine

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dreadedender · 1 year

Text

Drawing My Homestuck Ships Part 2

Continuing doodling and talking about ships I like, lol.

1. EriNep: My eyes widened when the story mentioned Eridan tried getting into a relationship with Nepeta and we didn't get to see any of it. Since then, my head's been full of the possibilities. I hinted at it in my Meenah's Feferi AU, but I'd like to make an AU where Eridan gets character development by not being isolated from the group as he was, instead, hitching onto the Meowrals' dynamic. Think about it! As Equius has most of his attention on Aradiabot during the early days of the session, Nepeta 'gets stuck' with Eridan and the two gain a strange bond. Nepeta has a pension for picking up and managing pathetic saps (*looks at Equius*) so although he's annoyed her in the past, seeing him post-break up intrigues her cursed shipper heart to try to help him get out of his funk. Any stupidity thrown her way, she's able to bite back perfectly well, and at the threat of her leaving and him being alone, he would always calm down and apologize. Their spats slowly subside the more time they spend together (maybe she even sticks around his horrid world and helps soothe the Angels before the massacre really begins), and come near the end of their SGURB session, Equius is able to rejoin the dynamic again and makes an uneasy peace with his 'mortal enemy'as both are disgruntled highbloods watching their privilege being reduced to nothing. But with his new connection, Eridan doesn't think about leaving anymore. He's still mad, but not nearly as desperate. He's got friends now. And his connection with Nep only grows stronger when Gamzee snaps, Eridan is tasked by Equius to protect Nepeta, and he dies doing so. (May write the scene and more shippy moments in their friendship prior to dying later)

2. JadeTav: I WISH THEY GOT TO MEET. It didn't occur to me at all that Karkat was Jade's patron troll. I really thought it was Tavros! And I had hoped that his confession would bear fruit later on in the story, after they actually got to know each other better through the journey. Tavros really took it like a champ! It made me so proud of him :[ Maybe I should make an AU for it where Tavros lives and IS the troll to help her the most. I just think their friends-to-lovers potential was too strong and wrongfully cut short. They had a wholesome, supportive, and dorky dynamic. (And yeah maybe it would've been cool too to slap back Vriska's taunts about him being pathetic for being 'friendzoned' by having them be official later. They were good for each other, they just needed time.)

3. EquiKat: This stems, like I am realizing most of these ships do, from my desire of the canon interactions to have gone differently. I would have liked to have seen a rougher Equius that posed more of a threat to Karkat's leadership instead of him being all talk and no action. Yeah the bit is funny that he likes being bossed by lowerbloods, but I felt it would have been better to see more of the struggle of him not wanting to let go of his stubborn beliefs (and it'd help give him more reason to 'give in' to Gamzee killing him other than 'haha horni', that he was actually glad something was 'making sense' to him again).

So there'd be constant arguing between the two, Karkat getting especially vicious with the increasing criticism, eve having fun finding new ways to shut the indigo-blood up quicker just by getting closer to him, until enough time passes and he has the very disturbing realization that the headaches he got from having Equius around have been replaced with catharsis and clear-headedness after their arguments. Equius provides an outlet for him to get all his frustrations out, and after their big show of insults, the two are able to calmly talk things over, and Karkat can actually think clearly. He jas very clearly fallen into a pitch relationship with the sweaty horse troll. He's embarrassed, and the others jump at making fun of the situation.

Nepeta is baffled and miffed that he got into Karkat's shipping chart before her.

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maranull · 1 year

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Since you did wholesome haligtree twins headcanons can we see wholesome carian siblings headcanons?

Sure thing!

Ranni:

Extremely stubborn from her first day in the world, Ranni always did whatever she wanted.

She spent most of her time with Blaidd and Iji, running around and causing chaos.

Despite her unruly nature, she was actually really kind and caring to her brothers when they were babies.

Rykard was always the easiest to cradle to sleep, and despite the occasional pull, she actually liked how he grabbed her hair in his sleep.

Radahn was a pain to even lift in her arms but it melted her heart hearing him laugh with joy every time she gave him a piggyback ride.

Although when they grew up enough to be able to take the wild games she was used to with Blaidd and Iji, the royal boys were treated like piñatas.

She was/ is very much attached to Rennala.

She actually didn't really care for sorceries as a teen, but stuck with her studies in order to not make Rennala sad, and grew to love the studies in time.

Her antagonistic, feral parts of her personality come from Marika and she never missed a chance to engage in verbal fights with the goddess.

Blaidd:

He was more puppy-like than human-like as a baby.

His excitement was always evident when he saw any of his family and would always run to hug them.

The blatant shows of affection died down as he entered his teens, but his adoration for his family never dimmed.

He mostly played with Ranni and Iji, being the middle ground between Ranni's feral nature and Iji's overly protective one.

He slept with Ranni and Rennala whenever he or Ranni got nightmares as kids.

Rennala once gave him a pillow and he still has the remains of the cover hidden in one of his armour pockets.

As his Radahn grew up, Blaidd was his first sparring partner and even taught him the first basics in greatsword techniques.

When not with Ranni or Radahn, he spent time with Rykard, learning to read and analyze stories and histories.

Rykard:

A very quiet child, Rykard spent most of his time alone, in libraries and workshops.

He never really showed affection to his family, but they all had an understanding that his reserved nature was not from lack of love.

He actually spent most of his time with Blaidd, enjoying the silence as they both spent time reading together.

Both of them had an unique understanding of each other and Blaidd was always the first one to learn about Rykard's amorous adventures.

While not as much, he also spent a lot of time with Iji, talking about metallurgy and various smithing techniques.

As he grew up, he began undertaking longer and longer journeys, and always brought something back for the family.

He never actually offered them their gifts, he simply placed them to each person's favourite spot in the Academy or Manor.

Despite his reserved nature, he is actually extremely charming and well-spoken.

He really likes otters. (yes there are now otters in the Lands Between, don't question it)

He and Iji worked together to make Leonard's saddles.

Radahn:

While not as energetic as Ranni, he was a close second in destruction of property in the Manor.

Energetic and loud, he was a pain for Rykard and a joy for Ranni, as she now had another brother willing to break (literally and figuratively) things around the Manor and Academy.

Out of all the kids, he kept sleeping in his mothers' room the most.

As a kid, he was really self conscious about his rapidly growing size and found a lot of solace and comradery with Iji. Whom, while older, was going through a similar growth spurt.

After he got more comfortable with his size, he began being proud of all the options it unlocked.

He rarely dared to do it, but a few times Ranni was being the usual pain to the people of the Manor, he did put her in air jail (<- tiktok link, I'm sorry).

The first time he saw a horse, he refused to leave the area unless he was promised that he would one day get his own horse.

From then on and until he left the Manor, his room was decorated with ungodly amounts of equine related materials.

Iji:

The quietest and most rule abiding of the five, Iji is also the oldest of them. He was already a good 6 years older than Ranni before he was brought into the family along with Blaidd.

For many years, he remained aware of the fact that he was the only one that wasn't regal or special in the family. In fact, he was supposed to be their servant. It took lots of time and love from the whole family to make him realise that he was as much family as the rest of them.

The first time he cried was when Rennala referred to him as "my child".

Most of his time was spent trying to either convince Ranni that she shouldn't do the newest reckless plan of hers, and she should, in fact, study for her future accession to queendom.

Despite his now regal uprising and lack of responsibilities, he did love smithing and physical work, and spent his learning time doing that.

After the Ranni-Blaidd duo, his closest friend was Radahn.

Apart from working with Rykard in making Leonard's saddles, Iji showed his affection by making various useful items for the family.

He made Blaidd's sword, Radahn's armour and Rykard's crown, among other things.

If anyone tries to argue that Blaidd and Iji are not Carian siblings, I'm not hearing a word. You're just plain wrong, shoo.

Also, some of them leaped over the wholesome and were just plain headcanons but I'm keeping them in. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thaaaank you for the ask! I love the Carian kiddos!

(btw, self-promo -> here's a fic with the Ranni-Blaidd-Iji trio being kids :P)

#elden ring #ranni the witch #blaidd the half wolf #rykard #radahn #iji #headcanons

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prongsmydeer · 2 years

Text

Ayesha Liveblogs She-Ra S1

“Is that a mouse?!” Why is it just an accepted fact of this universe that some people are furries and scalies

“This is what I raised you for,” is a messed up thing to say to anyone but particularly in the context of a military draft

I know “Horde” is an actual word but that it’s called the Horde and their leader “Hordak”... imagine if the Empire in SW was “the Darthettes”

Based on only these two scenes Catra seems like a difficult friend to have with the sulking and not waiting her turn at the helm

“Dear Mom, I feel like you don't respect me.” A teenage mood

Bow picking up and folding Glimmer’s clothes, what a sweetheart

“Will you fight for the honour of Grayskull?” Seems like an unfair question without defining Grayskull

“Not much for talking, huh?” “I prefer not to swap pleasantries with my captors.” Adora makes a very reasonable point, Bow

Speaking of captors, I assume that Adora did once have parents:

“Where’s a blinding flash of light when you need one?” We call that foreshadowing

Glimmer’s core personality trait so far is stubbornness to a fault

“I never knew where I came from or who my family was. Shadow Weaver said it didn’t matter who I was before, that I was nothing before Hordak took me in. There’s always been a part of me that I just don’t know anything about.” Which came first Finn from Star Wars or Adora from She-Ra lmao

Adora discovering birthdays and horses and all she missed of the outside world is really very endearing

“She’s been messing with our heads since we were kids.” “How could you possibly be okay with that?” “Because it doesn’t matter what they do. The two of us look out for each other. And soon, we’ll be the ones calling the shots.” It’s actually really sad that Catra is so resigned to being manipulated and that she views Adora as her entire support system, someone put these girls in therapy

“But I was stupid. And a jerk, and I almost got us killed.” That was a quick turnaround time on the stubbornness, good on Gimmer

“It’s been an honour serving beside you, Horsey.” I delight in every minute of screentime that Bow has

I feel like a lot of these Horde soldier concerns can be partly addressed by making sure Adora has a different outfit when she meets the queen

I love the immediate friendship with the horse and how they just call them “Horsey”

“She attacked our troops with a sword and then fled with the help of a winged beast.” I mean... Adora defended herself with a sword, which is not the same thing as attacking. These guards are lying. She-Ra said, even in pastel space: ACAB

“I know her secret.” “And what’s that?” “Hm. Like I’d tell you.” Everything about Catra just screams I am gay and in 10th grade at all times. I’m sorry I compare everything to Naruto but she is Space Lesbian Furry Sasuke. I will not elaborate

I’m guessing Mara is a previous host(?) of She-Ra

“I don’t have my glasses, you’ll have to speak up.” I relate to this sentiment, Madame Razz

Very genuine question: Is She-Ra’s pacing/dialogue slower than the average animated series because I keep having to switch it to 1.25 speed in order to move through the show hfkjhfkjhf what is up with it

Although I understand that this is a struggle between a corrupt military empire and a rebellion of united forces/nations a la Star Wars, whenever they bring up that this is a monarchical system, I can’t help but be like, “Dissolve the monarchy!!” I blame Magi the anime. Or the British empire. Probably both

“Catra has been nothing but a disappointment to me.” “If you have failed to condition her properly, you have no one but yourself to blame.” Hordak and Shadow Weaver are like a divorced couple who can’t agree on how to teach their kids responsibility

This is the second time I’m mentioning it, but how much of the outward hostility towards Adora would be solved if they got her a different outfit???? A lot of it, probably

I am assuming that Shadow Weaver is fixated on Adora mostly bc she is a lost princess and not bc she has any emotional attachment to her

“You want She-Ra to fix everything, but you won’t even try to save yourselves?” They are so close to the idea of democracy and yet so far

Lmao @ these three teens turning a diplomatic supply mission into encouraging a pacifist nation to throw away their ideology and smack people down with plants

How the heck was Adora hiding that GIANT sword in her Horde uniform and somehow no one took note. No one ever managed to look at her back as she walked in?????

“Would I get to hit more people with flowers?” Perfuma said: Actually it turns out, I love violence

Bow and Glimmer giving Adora a firmer bed and sleeping in her room bc they understand she’s used to military barracks... I love the Best Friend Squad

It’s funny how often Queen Angella makes war decisions based on ‘Glimmer asked very nicely’

“Everyone here looks like a real pirate.” I’m gonna be real with you, Bow, it looks like you’ve entered a lesbian bar rather than a pirate’s tavern, but I guess there is a Venn diagram crossover of interests

“Tragically, they went down in flames.” “How did that happen?” “I set them on fire.” I think I like Captain Sea Hawk

The men on this show are fun. Bow is so easily excited and impressed and Captain Sea Hawk is no thoughts just vibes

Gkhgkgjhg Shadow Weaver not giving Catra the Force Captain orientation while simultaneously using her to hunt Adora is kind of like cutting off her nose to spite her face

There is something about the concept of Mermista and Sea Hawk dating that I find very endearing:

Does some voice innately speak to Adora or does she point the sword and hope

“Try being the daughter of an immortal queen when your powers are ‘sparkles.’” 1) Salt in the wound to be named Glimmer kghkgjhgk imagine if Superman/Clark Kent was called Laser Eyes also 2) Way to casually drop that Queen Angella is immortal??? What???

Makes a lot of sense that Bow would have the advantage in a battle since he seems to have been an active part of the rebellion for some time vs these Horde cadets who are on their first mission

She-Ra’s height is a little perplexing bc Adora seems to essentially maintain her proportions so rather than being a tall person she just looks like a person x1.15. Adora + HST (Hardy Size Two)

Update from 3 minutes later: Mermista just described her as an ‘eight foot tall lady’ which doesn’t make any sense at all. She is one (1) head taller than Catra, and I don’t think Catra is 7 feet tall. She-Ra’s gotta be like. 6′5″ at best

Confused by Bow’s gesture with Mermista, is he participating in the magic or just posing???

“The Horde almost destroyed my home. I wanna help fight them.” This feels like a strong description for what happened. They knocked at your door and you kicked their sixteen-year-old asses. But I see your point, Mermista

The sixth episode intro is giving very much Jumpstart 3rd Grade

“I designed the castle as a labyrinth. I’m the only one who can navigate it.” What a horrible thing to do to your staff. Even cartoon rich people have no perspective LOL

[Glimmer Tiktok audio voice] 🎶 Adora wake up, I don’t like this, Adora wake up 🎶

I understand that Entrapta’s thing is tech but characters who like to experiment on beings with sentience give me the heebie jeebies like would she normally dissect a person like Adora??

Also I feel like it would’ve been more humanizing if she felt any emotion at all towards fighting the First Ones tech robots. But she seems to be indifferent to both people AND robots???

I appreciate that they’re starting to show the need for and strength of individuals like Bow and the kitchen staff in this world where princesses seem to be the be-all end-all of strength against the Horde

“You each have a skill that only you can do, even if it doesn’t come from some magical jewel.” Bow on theme as always. Love him to pieces:

Also LMAO @ Bow convincing the staff to join in on the robot fight in less than 10 seconds

“I don’t have enough energy to teleport us all right now. Not without leaving someone’s legs behind.” Is the implication here that Glimmer has left someone’s legs behind before jkhgkjhg

Loving how much this ep relies on teamwork <3 Go Bow’s Kitchen Robot Mercenary Squad hahaha

Entrapta immediately putting back together the disc that nearly just killed them. Hoo boy. Always trust your heebie jeebies

“My Aunt Castaspella is head sorceress there.” JKGHKJGHKJGH I guess I understand why Angella named her daughter Glimmer. They do literal names only in this family LMAO

They’re reinforcing that She-Ra is eight feet tall, which again, HOW?

“How nice that Glimmer has finally started making some friends.” We all have an aunt like Aunt Casta jghkjghgj

“Adora, do you know what ‘aunt’ means?” “No, I was just hoping someone would eventually explain.” KJHGKJGHKJGH Adora, what do they teach you in evil military space school

“Some say she never really left. That’s she only biding her time, waiting to exact her revenge.” Wgkjhkgjhg the connect between Light Spinner and Shadow Weaver is as subtle as a ton of bricks

Awww Glimmer and Bow immediately understand that Shadow Weaver is Adora’s Terrible Mum

Wasn’t sure til now if Shadow Weaver knew that Adora was She-Ra

“You never loved me. You just played twisted mind games.” Everything about Shadow Weaver and Adora is like. Hallmark abuse

It’s cute how the beach has clouds as waves. I love world-building

“If you want to take down Adora, you have to go for the heart.” 1) Don’t like that 2) Why the lingering shot on Bow rather than Bow and Glimmer

“Unfortunately, you’re the only I can trust around here.” “Because we’re best friends.” Scorpia is kind of delightful lmao

“I never really fit in with the other princesses.” It’s tough being a half Scorpion in this economy

Princess Prom is SO cute I love their outfits and the ball concept

“But don’t you see? That’s how it starts. Then suddenly everyone has new friends and nobody needs me anymore.” Glimmer needs to talk to a therapist about her anxious attachment

Bow is VERY good at communicating his feelings and boundaries with Glimmer re: having other friends. We love an emotionally aware man

“She stole my food and asked me to spy on people with her. Is this what love feels like?” Being gay and in 10th grade: Jealousy Edition

I guess Scorpia and Catra chose Bow first because he was the more accesible target, given Glimmer’s teleporting abilities

Catra continues to ruin Adora’s life and then question why she doesn’t want to hang around with her lol

“We’re the Princess Alliance. And the Horde took one of our own.” YEAHHH MERMISTA, I LOVE A TEAMWORK <3333333

Fjgkhkgjhg I would say that Mermista got the short end of this mission task for the sewer thing, but Perfuma and Adora have to wrangle Sea Hawk and Entrapta lol

GKJHKJGHKJGH a very honest take from Bow:

Bow: Why are you telling me all this?

Kyle: I don’t know... I guess because you’re the first person who’s listened to me.

Bow: I mean, I’m being held prisoner, so I don’t know that I have a choice... but sure!

“Go to the force captain barracks and pack your things. Now that Adora is back, there’s no need for you there.” I feel like the flaw in Shadow Weaver’s thinking is how she possibly believes Adora could fight for their cause again

Adora sacrificing herself to get the rest of the Princess Alliance out is giving Season 1 VLD Allura, Dreamworks got one mission move

“You shall stay willingly, because I am going to wipe your mind.” Ah, there it is

GO GLIMMER GIVING SHADOW WEAVER THE PUNCH SHE DESERVES:

“This is not because I like you,” said Catra as she handed over the sword, even though it definitely was, proving that being gay and in tenth grade can in fact lead to the downfall of imperialism

[Princess Alliance as ATLA voice] ‘Did Entrapta just die?’ ‘You know, it was really unclear’

Gjkghkjgh the fact the flames were the same moody green light for the door shut/burst of flames as it was for Jet in the underground. If the people who wrote this ep did not watch ATLA, I would be SHOCKED

As a sidenote, I don’t think Entrapta’s dead lol. It wouldn’t have even crossed my mind to consider she was dead until Bow suggested it LOL, I really just thought it was the door closing

“If I had known, I never would’ve agreed to your foolish plan.” All this Horde team meeting suggests is that Hordak is not a particularly effective leader LOL

I think honestly they should’ve kept him obscured for longer to up his villainous aura. Like on a scale of cartoon villainy from like, Dr. Doofenschmirtz to Him in that one really fucked up episode of Powerpuff Girls, this guy seems like a solid Hawk Moth. He’s certainly not as scary as the comparable media of VLD’s Zarkon

“What do you do when you have a cold?” “Remain out of sight.” [Concerned glances] “What? Displays of physical weakness are strongly discouraged in the Horde.” Once an episode Adora reminds everyone of what a horrific childhood she had

Not sure what Glimmer plans to achieve by hiding her Dark Magic Flu, surely deceiving her mother will only result in more restrictions later on

In answer to an earlier question, Adora’s strategy for figuring out her She-Ra powers really is just ‘point the sword and hope’

“Hey, you can’t just touch another woman’s tail without asking,” said Scorpia, like they weren’t holding Entrapta captive without asking

In fairness to Glimmer and Adora, they really just had to take the others word for it. They didn’t see what happened to Entrapta!

“Am I the only one who cares about sword safety around here?” Poor, rational Bow has been cursed to be besties with two people whose only two braincells constantly scream, ‘Magic’ and ‘Fight’

Again, I get that Entrapta is representing a specific type of person but it doesn’t sit right with me how ambivalent she is about the Horde. What is ur moral code Entrapta? What matters to u, aside from making technological discoveries? Who matters?

“I was hard on you. I won’t deny it, and I won’t apologize. I just wanted to prepare you for the world. I wanted you to be strong.” “Well, congratulations, I’m plenty strong now.” Yaddah yaddah generational trauma

“I shouldn’t have been so weird about you hanging out with someone else. I’m sorry Bow.” Glimmer’s hand on Bow’s chin as she reassures him: <3 Best Friend Squad

“I don’t know how you feel? I got your father killed!” WHAT IN THE ABBY GRIFFIN

Ah, it was more of a battle decision than a betrayal lol

“Don’t make the same mistake I did. I should have kept fighting, and you should too.” Wow, this episode wasn’t kidding about yaddah yaddah generational trauma

“You must let go.” Does this mean that She-Ra also has to go on a spiritual journey towards asceticism and not prioritizing her loved ones with a mystical racially-coded guru a la Aang

Update from 18 min later: Yeah.

I like that Catra and Adora are finally getting to hang out again, even if it is while they are being attacked by giant spiders during the Alien Mega-Computer Hang-out Cyber-Security Lockdown

“I knew you’d be weird about me letting you escape. I told you it’s not because I like you,” Adora said the furry doth protest too much

These Fright Zone simulations are very sweet <3 Childhood!!

I love the subtle contact like Adora smiling when Catra’s tail brushes her hands

“Adora, you must do a better job of keeping her under control.” Again. This favourite and scapegoat.... sickeningly realistic abuse tactic hoo boy

“I didn’t want you to come back.” We have circled back to Space Lesbian Furry Sasuke. Sever your bonds so u can get stronger Catra (derogatory/affectionate):

“I wonder what I could’ve been if I’d gotten rid of you sooner.” You would’ve unlocked your mangekyo sharingan, Catra

“You ever meet someone and just instantly click?” Awww Scorpia’s adoration of Catra is quite sweet

NJFKKJFHFKJ what I imagine to Catra’s inner monologue

Scorpia: She is the best friend ever.

Catra, biting her fist to keep from crying: Adora used to call me that.

“I watched you grow up from afar.” That’s a weird thing to say

KHGKJHGKJGHK lmao @ Adora pointing it out as well. “Creepy? Yes, I have, I been called this before.” I’ve only known Light Hope for like 10 seconds but already I enjoy her

“Our horse!” “I... am my own horse.” WHAT THE HELL SWIFT WIND CAN TALK?

“As part of Adora’s herd, I need your help.” That’s so cute and weird that Swift Wind measures friendship by herd. I am so thrown by this horse thing, I had no clue this was coming

“I will not consign you to the same regrets.” Angella said the generational trauma ends with me!!!

“Etheria’s not just a planet. Whatever the First Ones did to it, it went deep.” Oh good, I have been perplexed about what the hell Etheria was in the first place. A solar system? A galaxy? A country? So they are all living on the same planet, yeah?

I didn’t know the ‘You’re asking me about my theories’ audio came from She-Ra

“The First Ones were explorers who journeyed from beyond the stars to settle Etheria.” So were they like the actual first ones or is this a North America type of situation

“You are the first She-ra in a thousand years.” Ah, exposition

“Which means, [the runestones are] our best access point to hack the planet.” ENTRAPTA. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

Is this little guy Hordak’s son or like. The Wicked Witch’s flying monkeys

Oh. He’s like that iDog Robot that plays music from ur mp3 player

“You are distracted by your attachments. There was one before you who could not let go.” Oh no, Adora’ll never reach the Avatar state now

Wait Madame Razz knows Mara the She-Ra from ONE THOUSAND YEARS AGO? How old is she????

“Mara stranded us in the empty dimension of Despandos.” Stranded whomst?? Etheria?? Did she plop u down like a pin on Google Maps??

I assume it will become apparent to us that Mara had a reason for what she did

“You’re really going to let this... this Princess tinker with my runestone?” “Her tinkering has boosted the firepower of every weapon she’s touched. So yes, she gets to tinker with whatever she wants.” This what happens with u mix feminism with imperialism LMAO

On that note, is power passed on matrilineally in this universe? Since it’s all princesses using the runestones, I guess gender must be a relevant factor in magic usage, huh? Unless weirdly for two generations everyone just happened to have exclusively daughters?

“Freedom, equality and hay for all.” Fascinated by the horse politics

“What good is all of your power if you don’t use it to help the people you love?” This is why I don’t see the point of these spiritual or emotional journeys to let go of the people around u. Ultimately, isn’t their reason for continuing to pursue balance, or the mission, or whatever the hell, the love of their people? I can’t believe I’m taking narrative reflections from a horse

“I didn’t do this fulfill some destiny. I became She-Ra to help others. My attachments, my friends, they’re part of who I am.” THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING, ADORA

“It’s in the name. Net-ossa. I toss nets!” “Yes darling, you have beautiful nets.” Are Spinerella and Netossa girlfriends? <3 <3 <3 Love that for them

“All I did was push [Catra] further to the side of evil.” I don’t think you can take responsibility for that Adora, Catra chose this all on her own

Kinda worried they might kill or incapacitate Angella. Glimmer only has one living parent!

Catra is being so mean and for what? Cause Adora’s more athletic and she’s the Avatar-Jinchuriki-Jedi-Chosen Magical Girl? Please

Wouldn’t covering Etheria in darkness make it unsuable for the Horde? What do you gain from destroying the planet? Isn’t that where you want to take over? Very, ‘I’m one of the idiots who live there’

Oh my god. Has Glimmer been glitching because she’s connected to the Black Garnet now. Oh my god. IS GLIMMER GONNA BLOW UP THE HORDE

Adora apologizing for not being able to save the world on her own and Bow immediately comforting her, paying no heed to the weapons aimed at them... I LOVE THEIR FRIENDSHIP A LOT 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Also really enjoy how apparent they’ve made it that Spinerella and Netossa are 1) very nice and 2) very talented and battle-equipped

MERMISTA AND SEAHAWK AND PERFUMA WOOOOOOOOOOO

Even the little ice princess whose name I cannot recall!!! Whole gang’s here

Entrapta could be here too if she gave her friends the benefit of the damn doubt and didn’t terrorize the world for the sake of science!!

Absolutely LOVE that Sea Hawk and Bow are part of the princess magic rainbow blast:

“You will have other chances to prove your worth to me as my second in command.” Hate this for Catra. Like the Non-Space Lesbian Furry Sasuke, I just want her to get some therapy for her childhood trauma and then understand that experiencing love is not a weakness

What a colourful and happy ending to a violent battle. This show is really trying to balance two wildly different aesthetics and tones, huh? It’s grown on me, though! I like it

#ayesha says things #liveblogging #ayesha liveblogs she-ra #attention span hack: liveblogging shows forces u to concentrate while watching #low focus was def a challenge for this one LOL #it took literal years to finish season 1 #she-ra #television #long post

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citrusfield · 8 months

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♡ @soft-drabbles

"no, but what he doesn't know won't hurt him, right? although he is pretty tough… he could probably kick your ass if he finds out." freya gives one of his biceps a gentle poke as if she's unimpressed, but the smile playing at the edges of her lips makes it difficult to keep up the act for very long. despite being on her feet all day, the relief at having him here seems to have temporarily wiped away any signs of exhaustion. for a while there, she'd feared they had both grown much too stubborn to ever figure out how to see eye to eye again; even an act as simple as bringing her flowers feels like a big step in the right direction. "do i now? flatterer." predictably, she was already on the verge of denial before it's cut short and his words make her press her lips together like a child being told off. she knows damn well that her hair is frizzing and her concealer probably wore off hours ago, but he's definitely right about one thing — arguing the point is futile. "okay, if you insist... just let me grab my stuff and then we'll go get some tacos. i could eat a horse right now." the mere thought of food alone has her stomach quietly rumbling. thank god he came when he did.

#script / freya fisher.#threads / freya & rafe.#soft-drabbles #take 2

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incomingalbatross · 1 year

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@brambleberrycottage I read Vespertine! Saved most of it for the second long drive of my Christmas break, and enjoyed having it. :)

I liked it. The worldbuilding premises of "ghost problems" and "conscripted spirit warfare" felt very Jonathan Stroud, but I think I like Rogerson's style better. I...wasn't sure how I felt about the use of some Catholic aesthetics and vocabulary, but it WAS really cool to see a medieval-fantasy-world's religion actually make use of medieval cathedrals and stained glass and illuminated manuscripts and so on. A depiction of Fantasy Not-France that includes gothic cathedral spires?? It made the whole thing feel more grounded, unexpectedly. (Also, I appreciate that the Catholic-coded Fantasy Religious Orders aren't evil. On the whole.)

I like Artemesia, too, and her relationships with the people around her. She's got quite a bit in common with El Higgins in the "stubborn unhappy goodness" department! I would definitely read more about her. (...Although, after reading Artemesia and Muderbot and El relatively recently, I'm feeling an unexpected craving for a first-person narrator who enjoys being around people. Where are all the extroverts at :P)

More spoilery comments under the cut:

Poor revenant. :( I assumed it was going to end up as a Friend but I wasn't expecting the backstory.

Also, poor revenant for being handed a girl who is this bad at noticing her own needs. Very stressful.

Again, I really liked that the religious orders were caring and benevolent, and even the messed-up members of the structure like Leander and the Divine felt more like... people who had slipped through the cracks. Even with all the Dark Secret Backstory, it didn't feel like the tired old "organized religion as a corrupt institution" take.

Speaking of Leander! I DID guess pretty early, I think, that he wasn't evil, mostly because we keep getting glimpses of him looking less evil when he thinks no one's looking. Poor boy is just Very Stressed. I did not at all guess the Divine's deal, though.

I was excited when Marguerite showed up, because I could tell she was going to get Unexpected Depth, but the eventual conversation between her and Artemesia surpassed my expectations. I love all complicated sibling-adjacent relationships, and I think theirs qualifies by the end.

I also love the guards! And that the people in general so consistently look at Artemesia and see she's a hero—a refreshing approach to this sort of "rogue hero on the run" thing. But I especially love the Captain (even if I don't remember how to spell his name).

Also Priestbane! So glad she got her horse back.

This isn't exactly spoilery but: I really like the worldbuilding choices that feel like medieval Europe, as said above. It feels honest in a way a lot of medieval-ish aesthetic fantasies don't, though I couldn't quite pin down how.

Additionally, the aesthetic choices do a good job at making Artemesia Very Cool. Which I approve of. And I like the way Rogerson writes imagery, in general. It's just...pleasing to me.

My favorite scene might be down in the tunnels when she realizes the revenant is also a kicked goat. It feels like one of the biggest turning points, even though they'd been building friendship for a while, and brings together all the parallels between them in a way I really like.

I would love to see Artemesia run into her little brother in a sequel.

I am also staring at the spirit classification chart, very suspiciously, and I am thinking WHERE DO SUICIDES GO IN THIS.

Seriously, I kind of assumed the penitent was a suicide. But no, that cause of death isn't listed here at all... I am Eyeing This Omission With Interest.

Anyway, thank you again for this! :)

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silly-goofy-mood · 2 years

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This is a LONG one, folks!

UC characters as Parks and Rec quotes!!

Arc 1/7

Hope Lovejoy in arc seven: "I promised myself I was not going to cry tonight, and I’ve already broken that promise five times. But I will not break it a sixth.”

Sir Mister Person: "I have the most valuable currency in the world: a blind, stubborn belief that I'm 100% right."

SK-73: "when people get too chummy with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't care about them."

Deb at the Sehuagans: "Although I truly hope that I never see you again, I do wish you a long and happy life."

Thavius at the very beginning of arc 1, probably: "I'd wish you good luck, but I believe luck is a concept created by the weak to explain their failures."

Bonus!!

Mister: "Who hasn’t had gay thoughts?"

Arc 2

Ash: "I wanted to make fun of stupid people while I get drunk. My two true passions."

Sasha about Mischka: "When you're in love, everything seems like a sign."

Robyn: "I have a permit." shows paper that says "I can do what I want"

Lyndell: "Girls love it when you can show them you're better than them at something they love."

Bonus!

Richard Lovejoy: "When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? Because I bet on all the horses."

Gem Lovejoy: "I'm not interested in caring about people." (Sorry not sorry)

Arc 3

Annie Wintersummer: "I just slept seven hours, which is twice as long as I usually sleep. I'm a bit disoriented."

Fey Moss: "I'm not ashamed to say I'm often inspired by myself."

Bombyx: "It’s pointless for a person to paint scenes of nature when they can go outside and stand in it."

Aldrum: "Well, I am not usually one for speeches. So, goodbye."

Diarmad at the post-world-saving party: "Put some alcohol in your mouth to block the words from coming out."

Arc 4

Aster: "Literally everything is a weapon. That folder, in my hands, is far deadlier than that bow of yours."

Quinn: "I don’t want to be overdramatic, but today felt like a hundred years in hell and the absolute worst day of my life."

Ace: "Winning is every kid's dream. But it's my destiny."

Russ: "If I keep my body moving, and my mind occupied at all times, I will avoid falling into a bottomless pit of despair."

Arc 5

Sougle: ”And you can trust me. Because I don’t care enough about you to lie.”

Omen, wearing a flumph hat and holding fifteen eirden plushies: "I am very powerful and feared by many."

Wren, asking Omen and Sougle to do anything: "There’s like a 30% chance they’ll both die."

Onyx: "Dogs should be rewarded for not being people."

Booker, talking about Shi'elle: "She’s the worst person I’ve ever met. I want to travel the world with her." (In TVC, Owen said she joined his crew)

Arc 6

Kipp Tupper: "I have no idea what I'm doing. But I know I'm doing it well."

Remeny in episode two: "What I hear when I'm being yelled at is people caring loudly at me."

SK-69: "I'm like an elephant. I walk into a room, and people are like, okay, he's there."

Beryl: "Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing."

Lottie, high on dreamlily: "Windows are the eyes to the house."

Arc 8

Sybilla: "There’s nothing we can’t do if we work hard, never sleep, and shirk from all other responsibilities in our lives."

Penny Lovejoy: "I like saying no. It lowers their enthusiasm."

Nephila Mori: "I don’t even have time to tell you how wrong you are. Actually, it’s gonna bug me if I don’t."

Helga Hatebad: "I am 100% certain that I am 0% sure of what I’m going to do.”

Sir Up Ton at the end of the arc: "I regret nothing. The end."

Arc 9

Julian in ep 2: "Oh, I have a medical condition, all right. It's called CARING TOO MUCH!"

Juniper, talking to Lacewing, probably: "No, I don't know how I'm going to die… Wait, are you telling me or asking me?"

Serenity: "Fishing relaxes me. It's like yoga, except I still get to kill something."

Art: "Jogging is the worst! I know it keeps you healthy, but god, at what cost!"

Riot: "Aw, you had a crush on me? That's embarassing!"

Valerian: "Riot, we're married."

#unprepared casters #dragons in dungeons #wizards off the coast #lovejoy's four #gonna raise hell #orb is life #lives of the party #the glacerian trail #the king is dead #once upon a crime

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zenthymiya · 2 years

Note

hi and congrats on 100 followers!! could i do a request for the ship event?

character - zhongli

name - lilly

pronouns - she/her

toxic traits - clingy at times LMAO and also can shut

down pretty easily, stubborn as well

fluffy traits - i laugh a lot LOL and i can be confident

personality - ALRIGHT so it's kinda hard to figure out how to describe my personality like i know what it is but idk how to explain????? i’m introverted with everyone i don't know and i'm not close with but i am pretty extroverted with the people i am close to. tbh animals>>> humans. i like the color purple, uhh i enjoy reading, writing, and drawing :> when i want to reach a certain goal i will always reach it no matter what, i'm a determined person. i care about those close to me deeply! i'm also passionate about things i enjoy. i have a creative and imaginative mind and i also hyperfixate on things but cannot focus. for. the. life. of. me. ) i'm also pretty patient for the most part! i ride horses, i do show jumping, the typa stuff they do in the olympics! obviously not as advanced tho LMAO BUT i have my own horse named red, he's a paint horse and he's really sweet. i'm 5'3 and i'm into working out! i try to get along with everyone no matter how much i like or dislike them. id also say i'm a pretty sarcastic person. usually it's pretty hard for me to fall asleep but once i am asleep i'm either deep in sleep or the sound of an eye blinking will wake me up LMAO

aesthetics - light academia + clean aesthetic

ideal date - something creative, dinner would be fine but i would prefer dinner with extra creative things and also just having fun in general and getting to know each other, even if you think you already know everything ab your s/o :)

relationship - non toxic

love - sweet with a little bit of angst + mild ;)

LillyLi

Going on dates with him is mainly you guys conversing together, although both of you are comfortable to sit in peaceful silence together, talking with each other is the highlight of all the dates.

Simple dates that you and him enjoy with a wide selection of foods while talking about anything. Getting dinner with him enjoying some traditional Liyue food while he tells you stories about his days about being Morax or any topic that comes to mind. Watching him wave his chopsticks still holding food around calmly as he recounts an interesting event that he had seen today.

You guys get desserts right afterwords if one of you guys crave it. You like to point out that his dessert was going to go bad if he didn’t eat it because he keeps on rambling. You love it though. I just think that another ideal date would just be you being out and about while Zhongli watches with literal stars in his eyes.

While he may not know a lot about the sport, he’ll recall some similar things he saw earlier in his life.

Sometimes you guys would do something together like ancient Liyue arts that he is very glad to teach you. He’s so down to simply do anything with you, wether it be practicing some sort of skill with you or simply shopping. In all honesty he just loves being by you and teaching you. Even if you can’t focus on what he’s showing you, he just chuckles at your dazedness and asks if you would like to do something else. He won’t get mad at all of you ask him to show you the steps again, seeing the twitch of your lips when watching him is enough to shine in his memory.

He loves the same things you do! You guys coordinate so well together. He’s more than happy to supervise your hobbies and offer advice while he does the same alongside you. Zhongli appreciates and loves your passion and creativity. He thinks it’s just gorgeous how you could create something so unique and have such a determined dead set mind. He’s always been one to appreciate your passions. He will sing so many praises, going on and on how extraordinary your craft is. Even if it’s simple he’ll always call you skilled and amazing at whatever you had made this time.

He will share his own personal stories that he’s illustrated himself in the form of writing, drawing, and even sculpting sometimes. He’s more than glad to provide you with the materials and guide your hands in his.

Nicknames nicknames nicknames galore.

You physically cannot feel insecure around this man because he will absolutely hold you down and kiss every part of you while listing off every achievement you’ve ever done while also saying that your body is absolutely gorgeous. He drones on and on about how wonderful you are for several hours

While he is the one who usually takes the reigns, he loves it when you talk about something that he doesn’t preciously know. It makes him feel all giddy inside and he shows by complimenting your knowledge on the topic

Please do go on and on about the new thing you had learned. While he does like to chime in here and there he is more than content to listen to you

He just loves cuddling you. Holding you close to his body while you try to sleep.

He’s a bit confused on while you switch up on touchiness so often. One second you wanna wrap your hands around him and the other you make him go the end of the bed. This man really does try to reason with you. Trying to get you to come back into his warm arms. He’s even pouting a little and his tail wraps around your arm to try and tug you back into his embrace. He tells you that sleep didn’t feel right the next day.

Zhongli is so enamored with your athleticism too. He is constantly watching you practice or applauding you when you preform something right. He enjoys watching you and often gives you various tips to similar things.

You often wonder how he never gets bored of watching you workout. He won’t admit it but he keeps himself entertained by letting his mind wander to other thoughts. While he keeps his composure most of the time, there was one time that he really couldn’t help himself with how delectable you looked. Heaving breaths leaving your chest, a smile on your face, and sweat gleaming down your body as you waved at him. He’s insatiable sometimes.

Under that sweet knowing smile he flashes you with he wants to see you sweat and tremble under him.

He gets so entertained when he imagines you riding him instead, letting you use his chest as reigns while he looks up and down your gorgeous body.

He loves the indigent protests you make when you say you can do this by yourself. Gently laughing while reassuring you that he believes in you and that he’s always there if you happen to need assistance.

Zhongli definitely praises you no matter how well you’ve practiced

Zhongli knows how stupidly stubborn you can be. Well he knows he can be too

He watched you struggle to do this one trick that you just couldn’t seem to get down. And you refused to leave only leaving when your body couldn’t physically take it anymore.

He offers advice and reassures you when he carries you because you were so tired that day.

Zhongli absolutely adores when you rely on him, use his shoulder as a pillow, relax in his hold when he carries you, even when you ask him to grab something for you. He loves to be your support pillar because he knows just as well you’ll be right there for him too.

Listening to Zhongli’s words will never get old to you. His soothing, calm, riveting voice that echos through the the room, bouncing off the walls as you lay on his chest. Listening to his rhythmic heartbeat and feeling the slow rise of his chest as you speak. This goes the same for him, as long as you can speak he’ll never not want to hear your voice. He says it sounds soothing to him. The waves of your voice never ceases to make him relax knowing that you are right beside him, living amongst Liyue with him.

Your first couple of dates were very awkward. As you didn’t know how to speak to Zhongli nor did you want to as he, in your eyes was still a stranger to some extent, yet you still didn’t want to turn down his date offer. Well how could you say no? Zhongli is handsome and knowledgeable, sure he can be forgetful but you liked him well enough despite his mysterious knowledge. Zhongli on the other hand rambled a lot, not knowing how to properly converse with you; he simply continued to talk about the little things he saw throughout the day.

It started out as little quips of input as response to him. Even so, Zhongli never budged, instead patiently waiting for you to open up to him more. And it worked. Just talking to him know is enough to set you on a ramble rivaling his.

As much as he is an amazing lover, things can get out of hand all because he loves your thighs more than anything.

They’re always bruised and littered with markings after some more steamy nights. He thinks his bite marks are pretty, they glow slightly orange yellow and look delightful on your thighs. You think it’s some master plan of his to get you to stay with him all throughout the day because god it is so hard to get up with bruised thighs.

You guys are both so fucking stubborn. You aren’t afraid to speak your mind but will never actually discuss with him because you don’t want to be proven wrong. Zhongli wants to cherish his time with you, that’s why he sweeps all of the problems under a rug. It is heavily implied though that he thinks that he is right.

When arguments happen you tend to close yourself off yet yearn for him. While Zhongli pretends it never happens, trying to normally go through the day with a very closed off you.

This goes on and on until you forget the problem because you just miss him too much. You really shouldn’t by the way, eventually he same topic will come up and the cycle will repeat. Just talk with him, don’t be afraid to let your guard down.

It hurts knowing that you’ll be gone one day, but the only thing he could do is simply enjoy every waking moment with you. He makes a personal contract with himself as to never forget you. Every part of you shall be remembered; from your smile to your laugh, even to your tears. He will never let himself remove your memory.

He will be always be by your side. Even if you shut down he’s right there, quietly questioning if you want anything.

Your aesthetics match so well together. He loves the scholar side of you, and he admires you for keeping your place organized.

You guys are so patient with each other actually. It’s kind of difficult to get into fights because both of you are very understanding for the most part

Zhongli will ensure maximum sleep. Always has the right amount of remedies for your perfect sleep. Sure he can get a bit concerned if he shakes you and you still don’t rouse, but it’s much better than you getting bad sleep. The moment you feel restless he’s already getting up to make soothing tea as well as offering a relaxing song fr him to hum as your lay against his chest. He has the best humming voice to sleep to. You will actually have the best sleep of your life.

He enjoys your laugh so much. Actually there’s a mutual feeling of enjoying each other’s voices. You like his deep, soothing, silky voice while he enjoys the melodies of how your voice shines through in his memories.

If he notices other people staring at your body he will absolutely give you his coat. He can’t help it, hall he wants is to keep you to himself and not let you be eye candy for anyone else.

“Dear.” Looking up from your drawing to see your partner standing next to you with a contemplative stare at your body.

He quickly averts his gaze away from your body avoiding eye contact with you, “I’ve noticed that you’ve been really.. sore lately,” looking back at your curious gaze he runs a hand down your back softly, “I was hoping to make you feel better if I massage you.”

Your eyes lit up, “Really? You’d do that for me?”

“Of course my flower, you er- have complained that it was of my own doing to make you this prone.”

As much as you love him, you just can’t let go of the fact that due to him you had to take almost two weeks off of any athleticism. A small smile settled on your face. “Weelll if you’re as good as massages as you are at rambling on and on I’ll be back to my regular activities in no time.” Your voice cheerful with a light tease.

Zhongli looks very slightly guilty, diverting his eyes as he coughs into his hand, face pink with embarrassment. “I- I am sorry for my actions, but please understand you are just.. very tempting my dear lily.” His eyes momentarily crossed to your exposed thighs full of light purple bruises.

He did not look the least amount of embarrassed or ashamed. He couldn’t help but the small twitch of his corner lip as he remembered just how pretty you were under him, looking so ethereal in his mind.

He knows you’d look even more heavenly with oil running down your skin, back exposed to him as he rubs all the knots away from your skin. He quickly averts his thoughts as fast they come. He couldn’t afford to get ahead of himself. Clearing his throat, his smooth rumbling voice reverberating in your body, “So? About that massage my love?”

#this was due several months ago #not my best writing but I will be revising it #I swear #thank you for being patient with me <3

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oftravisx · 1 year

Text

[ charlie hunnam ] – have you heard about [ travis corbin ]? [ he/him ] lives at the qz. i think they’ve lived there for [ several hours ]. they’re [ thirty-six ] yrs old and seem very [ assertive ]. i’ve also heard they can be very [ withdrawn ] as well. they’ve been assigned as a [ cord alley smuggler ]. they often daydream about [ a white picket fence and a thanksgiving dinner, his sons first steps and a sunset over southern roads ]. i’m curious to know more. | tia. gmt +1. she/her.

BASIC INFORMATION

NAME: Travis Wayon Corbin

NICKNAMES: N/A

BIRTHDAY: April 17th

AGE: 36

HOMETOWN: QZ

BIRTHPLACE: Nashville, Tennessee

RELIGION: N/A

ETHNICITY: White

JOB: Smuggler

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS

HEIGHT: 6′3

EYES: Blue

HAIR: Blonde

DISTINGUISHING MARKS: Scars across his body, tattoos on his hands, back and neck

NOTABLE FEATURES: Scar on his brow

PHYSICAL DISABILITIES: N/A

ALLERGIES: N/A

PERSONALITY & BEHAVIOR

HOBBIES: Carving sculptures out of wood, bird watching, reading, horseback riding, playing the guitar in the evening, shooting guns in an open field

LIKES: Laying out in the sun, long meaningless walks, listening to people talk about things they’re passionate about, photographs (they remind him of a different time), positive people and laughter

DISLIKES: Politics, people who are cruel to animals, people who don’t understand nuance and are very black and white, being told what to do, grass that eats other grass, empty promises.

POSITIVE TRAITS: Reliable, resilient, resourceful, analytical

NEGATIVE TRAITS: impatient, hot-headed, stubborn

BIOGRAPHY

Travis was born the oldest child in a rather messy family. Both his parents cared more for their vices than they did for their kids, and it was not uncommon for the two to leave their children for days and disappear. Travis learnt from young age to look after his siblings, the household, the horses. Although his grandfather was around to help, and teach the youngsters, it was predominantly left on the oldest boy to hold things together.

He didn’t mind. It was simply what ‘normal’ looked like to Travis. He’d go to school, get home, take care of what needed taking care of and sleep. A routine was important for him. And although his routine would get messed up every time his parents would decide to return and then up and leave again. He made it work. Up until his 13th year when the whole world took a turn. At first, the news were sporadic. And then it took over everything.

Him and his siblings were safe at first, but he never saw his parents again. The ranch had kept them isolated long enough to avoid the major chaos at the start. But this sickness swept everything in its wake and it wasn’t too long before Travis and his younger siblings and an elderly grandfather had to rush into hiding as well.

Except there was nowhere to hide. Nowhere was safe. Not land, not the sea. And if one did not have to fear the infected, they sure had to fear the living.

His siblings fell off, one after the other. First his youngest brother, bitten. His sister died of the infection, the grandfather disappeared in the night, and the only sibling he had left, his brother Darren, died years later during an unfortunate set of circumstances Travis could not protect him from.

When at his lowest, he met a woman on the road. She cared for him in more ways than one and when she got pregnant, Travis thought world was giving him another chance. A part of him which failed to protect his family before, both due to young age and paranoia and distrust, was now amped up to the max. He would not lose her, and he would not lose his son.

For years, Travis, Amelia and Jamie were on their own. They lived in the outskirts of cities. Surviving on land, hunting and good timings. When winter would come along, Travis would seek out warmth of caves for them to hide. But they could not hide forever. When Jamie was about 4, they found their first settlement in Nevada and staid there until the unrest which pushed them north. On the run, Amelia was shot and although Travis did everything humanly possible to get her to the next stop in time, it was just not fast enough. Next came years on the road: Idaho, Wyoming, Nebraska, Iowa and finally Illinois. There, the boys settled for years. But the leader of a small private settlement got into some shady business with a friend of Travis’ who owed him a great deal of money. In order to make things right, Travis tried to negotiate, but his leader Roger made it clear he would have to hand in his friend or face the consequences.

Travis refused to give in and reveal his friends location and in retaliation, Roger killed his only son. After this, Travis mostly blacked out. His body resorted to such a trauma response that he set the entire settlement on fire, killing everyone in it. He took his time with Roger though, and in the process got so beat up and messed up he was pretty much drenched in blood from head to toe when he finally emerged.

He then walked, and walked, and walked, as far as his feet would carry him and then everything went dark.

--- After this, unbeknownst to him, he was found by an old friend and taken to QZ where his wounds have been looked after. He’s only been in QZ for about a day or so and is just now regaining consciousness.

#pitts;intro #intro.

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orangelilies · 1 year

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therapy thoughts

today i had my second therapy session for this month (november was a nightmare for scheduling), and two of the stand-out moments involved two tests my therapist conducted with me: 1. the animal test 2. the cube/desert test

i'm mentioning this here partly to reflect and partly to make a note of these tests so i can dig a little deeper and make some notes for myself. i bought a file earlier this year to start collecting therapy exercises/techniques, and both appeal to me.

for a quick rundown: 1. the animal test i was asked to choose an animal i'd transform into given the option. mention the qualities about it i liked - disposition and appearance.

i was asked to choose a second animal, similar deal. then a third, similar deal.

my animals were, in order: 1. sloth 2. panda 3. honey badger we then went through what these animals represent 1. the ideal self - who do i most want to be and what does this reveal about me 2. the perceptual self - how do others see me 3. the true self - who am i actually my take-away was that my ideal and perceptual self are pretty close in alignment. namely, i want to be someone who is seen as being relaxed and low demand and that this is largely the impression i give. what was interesting, though, was the third because not only did i have to explain what a honey badger was but it made me aware of the fact that i'm actually quite a resilient and stubborn person. that i am, for the most part, content with who i am and how i look despite the fact that i am a little bit funny looking.

i'm tempted to send my therapist a picture of a honey badger so she can appreciate what i mean because i'm sure she thinks i made this animal up.

2. the cube test i'm going to leave this link here, because i did do a bit of digging on this one and found it to be pretty interesting.

we did a slight variation of this one in that i was asked to imagine a desert scene and not a meadow, but i can see how either could translate.

takeaways from this for me was: 1. my cube was large, grounded and made of glass (stained not transparent) which meant that i'm a more or less grounded and transparent person. we spoke a little about the choice of making the glass stained (i said blue) and how this color symbolism tied into my self-concept.

2. my ladder was metal, propped against the cube. this is apparently not unusual (the propping against the cube).

3. the cube and ladder were directly in front at me, but at a distance so i could see the whole of the cube. we didn't talk about distance so i might go look into that later, honestly.

4. my horse was beside me, looking very confused. it was a painted mustang (although my brain kept going to a more tortoise shell pattern, which may or may not be a thing). this was apparently significant because it reflected my friendships and romantic relationships.

5. any plant life in the area. i, knowing little if anything about the desert despite having a wonderful friend from arizona, who will probably disown me for my ignorance, so i just picked a (although i thought) arbitrary number - eight. turns out it wasn't that arbitrary at all but reflecting the number of people i love/am closest too; wouldn't you know it, it really was eight!!

6. finally, i had to imagine a storm and then talk about how the storm would affect these individual elements. the takeaway here was that, even if the storm was bad, it wouldn't break or destroy or otherwise ruin any of the other elements, which apparently means i'm quite comfortable in both myself and in my relationships. which was nice if a little surprising to me? yet as i think about it, i think i have been feeling a lot more certain lately. more grounded.

in other words, it was a good session. it was especially good for me to realize that, actually, the growth and deeper understanding i've been working toward seems to actually be happening and isn't just an aspirational thing i'm striving toward.

#self-reflection #psychology #awareness #therapy #mental health #personal ramblings #growth #insights #i have no idea what i'm doing right now #which is why i'm just putting this here #so i can have something to look at #but also get into the habit of using this more #plus figure out the format ig

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supernaturalgirl20 · 2 years

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Was thinking about Pero Tovar. Him loving a girl, thinking about her for months and then coming back to find her with baby. Him running away thinking she moved on and have a family. On the other side her being sad cuz she heard Pero is in her village and didn’t come to see her and baby she had alone. Then she met William and he congratulates her on having family and she just say there is only two of them and how much she miss Pero and how sad she is he do not love her anymore. William as a good friend slap the Spaniards face, made him to clean himself after his grieving period, made him buy a cute blanket and pick some flowers so he can meet his daughter.

Thank you for your request I hope you enjoy 😉

Forever Yours

Pairings: Pero Tovar x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, unprotected sex, angst, misunderstanding, fluff, mentions of pregnancy.

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

Pero was tired.

Weary right down to his bones as his horse slowed to a trot. He’s been gone longer than planned, the whole charade at the wall delaying things a bit. He longed for a bed of his own, a hot meal every day, the smell of the fresh country air, but most of all - he longed for you.

He’d been courting you before he left and when he had told you he was departing for a few months you had been eager to give yourself to him. Pero was not a good man. He would never claim to be but he hesitated when you asked him to take your virginity. He wanted to wait. Wait until you were his wife but you were stubborn. Something which both excited and irritated him.

Pero was also a man. An extremely horny man and when the woman he loved begged him to take her to his bed - although he hesitated - he could not refuse.

His trip away had made him crave stability. He thought of nothing else, nothing but coming home and making you his wife. To settle down in a nice cottage somewhere, anywhere and filling you until you bared his children.

He slowed his horse at the top of the hill, the small village he left you in sitting at the bottom nestled between trees. A sigh of relief leaves him and his friend laughs beside him.

“What is so funny amigo?”

“Nothing my friend. Are you hoping to find a certain woman waiting for you?”

Pero’s lips quirk into a smile as his gaze once again turned to the small village. He does not answer his friend. Instead he gallops off leaving William watching after him, a shit eating grin on his face.

***

While Sophia was asleep you decided to tend to the garden, something which has become sort of like a therapy for you. It is also the only way you can feed yourself these days, selling your produce in the local market to buy meats and bread.

The little cottage your father bought you before he died was nestled just in the edge of the forest, away from the gossip of the locals. Having a child and no father in sight was not something to be proud of. Not that you cared. Sophia was the image of her father, a little piece of him with you always. He was gone and you were left alone or raise your daughter but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

A sadness fills your heart at the thought of her father. He had been the love of your life, your home. But life doesn’t always play fair. The sound of Sophia’s hungry cries reaches your ears and you quickly wipe the dirt off your hands and make your way inside. She is quickly soothed and you carry her outside as you sit on the small bench.

She looks up at you with those big brown eyes and it melts your heart. “You are so like your daddy my little princess. He would have loved you so very much.”

***

Pero’s heart plummets into his stomach at the sight of you, babe in your arms. All months away he had thought of nothing but coming home to you and now, here you are with another man’s babe. Idiota!

Of course you wouldn’t wait for him. Of course you had moved on. He needed to get out of here. Couldn’t stand to be here when your husband arrived home and held you the way he wanted to. He cursed under his breath as he mounted his horse and rode off.

Arriving at the inn he passed William and went straight to the bar. “I need a woman for the night.”

“Of course. If you would like to have a drink and I can have it arranged.”

“Gracias.”

Pero sat with a huff at the table and William raised an eyebrow, shocked at his behaviour. “Did you not find your woman?”

“She is not my woman.”

“But I thought she said she’d wait? Y/N did not seem the type to lie.”

“All women are liars are they no? She found someone else and has had a family with him. If she has moved on, then so will I.” Pero downs his drink and stands to leave. William grabs ahold of his arm, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“I have no had a women in over a year. Yes, I am sure.” Arriving to his room he finds a buxom blonde waiting for him. She is nothing like you but he can pretend.

***

You had been strolling through the market when you heard his name mentioned. At first you had thought it a coincidence but then the blonde spoke his name again and you had you find out what they were saying.

“I’ve been going to his room for the last week and my god can that man fuck. He certainly knows what he’s doing.”

“Do you think he might want you? He could be your way out of this life?”

“No! When Pero comes he cries out some other woman’s name. His heart is with her, but I’ll enjoy it as long as it lasts.”

Your heart was racing. He’s home. Has been this last week and he hasn’t come to see you. You had held out hope that he works return to you and that you could be a family but he clearly doesn’t want that. You try to finish gathering your supplies as quickly as possible not wanting the villagers to see you cry but a hand on your shoulder startles you.

“Y/N, I thought it was you. Are you ok?”

Seeing William confirms that it is your Pero that the woman was talking about and the tears begin to fall. William is quick to pull you in for a hug, careful not to hurt the sleeping a baby at your breast. “Here, let me help you with all that.”

“You have a beautiful home,” he says as you near your little cottage. “Is your husband home?”

“Husband?! I am afraid it is just me and Sophia.”

William is a little confused and it clearly shows on his face until it dawns in him. “Pero! He is Sophia’s father?”

“Yes. I found out two months after he left. My father bought us this cottage to keep us away from the gossips.”

“He will be so happy to know you…”

“No! I don’t want him to know. He has been back a week and has not come near me. I overheard some of the women in the market, he has been finding comfort in the arms of someone else.”

“I’m afraid he thought you had moved on.”

“I would never. He’s the love of my life William, he should have known better.”

William stayed for lunch and then bid you farewell, telling you he would be back the next day to help around the garden. What he didn’t tell you, was that he was going to smack Pero across the head and tell him to go and beg forgiveness.

***

William marched over to where Pero was seated, the blonde perched on his lap. There is a flash of fear across the Spaniards face as he sees the anger on his friends face.

“I need to speak to you my friend.”

“I am a little busy amigo,” he says as his hand runs down the side of her waist making her giggle.

William nods his head at the woman and she hips off Pero’s lap. He pulls him up by the scruff of his neck and drags him outside.

“What are you doing, idiota.”

“You’re the idiot my friend. You need to clean yourself up and go and see Y/N.”

“I will do no such thing. She has made her choice.”

“She is not married.”

“And that is my problem?”

“Yes it is. That baby you saw, she’s yours.”

“What?” His face pales now as he looks at William, searching his face for lies.

“I ran into Y/N in the market yesterday. I helped her home and she explained to me that she found out two months after we left that she was with child. Your child.”

“I’m…I am a father?”

“Yes Pero you are. You need to clean yourself up and go into the market and buy flowers and something for your daughter. Then your going to go out there and beg her for forgiveness.”

“What have I done amigo?”

“Look, you didn’t know Pero. You thought she had moved on and you had a broken heart. Men do stupid things when they have a broken heart but you need to fix this. She heard Maria talking to the other women about you.”

“Mierda!”

***

Pero’s heart is racing.

The closer he gets to you the more nervous he becomes. William had helped him pick out a beautiful blanket and teddy for his daughter and he had picked flowers for you. Along with the ring around his neck.

He takes in a deep breath as he stands outside your door before raiding his hand to knock. He waits. For what feels like forever and when you open the door he’s blown away by how beautiful you look. You are stood there, his daughter in your arms, a little bit of flour on your cheek and his heart swells at the sight.

“Pero? What are you doing here?”

“Mi amor, I’m sorry. I did not know…”

“Pero you…”

“Please amor, let me finish. I came straight here when I arrived and when I saw you with a babe I assumed you had moved on. Married another man and my heart shattered. I sought comfort in another and I hate myself for it. Can you forgive me?”

“Pero…”

“Please mi amor, I am begging you. I thought of nothing else while I was away. While I fought monsters. I wanted to get home. Home to you and make you my wife.”

A smile spreads over your face as you watch the man you live grovel. He continues to ramble and the only way you shut him up, is by placing your lips in his. He’s shocked at first but then his arms come to wrap around you, pulling you close. That is until your daughter coos and his gaze shoots to her.

“Do you want to hold her? Her name is Sophia.”

He looks at you now, awe in his face. “My mothers name.”

“I remember you told me a story of her and I wanted our daughter to have a connection to you.”

“Sophia, mi pequeña princesa.” She looks up at him and he can see she has his eyes.

“You left a piece of you with me. My little surprise.”

“Can you forgive me?”

“Are you going to see that woman again?” You are teasing him now, knowing full well he won’t.

“Never. I only want you mi amor. Always you.”

“Then yes Pero. I forgive you.”

Sophia begins to stir in his arms and he looks panicked as he hands her to you. “She’s hungry that’s all.”

You pull your breast out and she latches on quickly, the only sounds in the room are her suckling on your nipple. Pero is ashamed at how quickly his cock hardens at the sight. You feeding his daughter from your breast has him hard as a rock.

“You are amazing mi amor. I should never have left. Yo era una idiota y voy a soend la reat de mi vida compensándote” I was an idiot and I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you.

“It’s ok Pero. I get it, I do. You came home and thought I’d met someone else. As long as you aren’t with another woman again.”

“Never mi amor. Never.”

“There are days I wish you never left but it doesn’t matter now that your home.”

Home. Pero had always thought it was a place but he was so wrong. You were his home. “Do you want to help bathe her?”

“Si. If it is ok?”

“Of course it’s ok Pero. Come I’ll show you what to do.”

***

Pero stayed and helped with Sophia, bathing and settling her for the night. You’d made dinner for him and then you both sat by the fire where he told you of his time away.

“William would have died if I had not saved him,” he told you as he explained about the monsters in China.

“He is lucky to have a friend like you.”

“Si, and I him. He came back yesterday after meeting you and smacked some sense into me. I’ve been an idiot and I want you to know that I love you very much.”

He pulls away and pulls a chain from around his neck where he has his mothers ring. You gasp as he turns toward you.

“Mi amor, I’ve wanted you to have this for a long time and I am sorry it’s taken all this to make me see sense but will you marry me? Will you be my wife?”

“Yes! Yes a million times yes.” He slips the ring on your finger and kisses you passionately. His hands begin to roam and growls into your mouth. “I need you mi amor. Can I have you?”

“Yes.”

He proceeds to make love to you in front of the fire. Taking his time, savouring the feel of you around him. As he draws near to his release he asks you where, you cry out “inside, please Pero…fill me.”

“Mierda.” He grunts as he comes hard, filling you with his seed. Pulling out he lays beside you, his hand coming to rest on your stomach. “We could have made another little Tovar tonight.”

“Oh god you’ll have me child every year at this rate,” you laugh as you lean up and kiss him. His face is serious as he looks down at you, his hand cupping your cheek.

“I’m forever yours, mi amor. Until my death.”

***

Two years later…

Standing at the table kneading bread you hear the laughter of your children as they play with their father. A smile spreads over your face at how happy you feel right now. Pero gave up selling his sword and settled down with you and Sophia, and sure enough that night by the fire he did get you pregnant again.

“William will be here soon mi amor,” Pero whispers as he wraps his arms around you from behind. His hands coming to rest on the small swell of your stomach.

“How is mi Pequeño guerrero?”

“Kicking up a storm. I expect nothing less from your son amor.”

He laughs at that, nuzzling into your neck. “Where are the girls?”

“Sophia is out in the flowerbeds and Olivia is down for a nap. I cannot wait to have you tonight mi amor.”

“You are insatiable Pero.”

“Only for you.”

The sound of Sophia shouting alerts you to Williams arrival and Pero pulls away reluctantly. “Wait until he sees you hermosa, he did no believe you were with child again.”

“This is the last time Tovar.”

“We shall see. Te amo mi amor.”

“Te amo.”

Permanent tag list: @lunaserenade @anaaaispunk @maievdenoir @elinedjarin @seasonschange-butpeopledont @alberta-sunrise @dihra-vesa @pintsizemama @athalien @loserrlauraa @thorins-queen-of-erebor @pascal-rascal424 @ikinmahlen @pascalisthepunkest @dindjarinneedsahug @almaeunice @jediknight122 @prostitute-robot-from-the-future @colorlesswhispersunknown @stevie75 @rosie-posie08 @hauntedmama @greeneyedblondie44 @prettylilhalforc @giselatropicana @phoenixhalliwell @sherala007 @its--fandom--darling @donnaa @javierpinme @luxmundee @littlemisspascal @hayley-the-comet @ezras-channel-rat @misspearly1 @writer-darling @misspearlssideblog @sara-alonso

#pedro pascal #pero tovar x f!reader #pedro pascal x reader #pero tovar x female reader #pedro pascal x female reader #pedro pascal fanfiction #pero x reader

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cheekygreenty · 3 years

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Can you write 10 and 12 fluff with the Darkling ?

Stubborn - The Darkling x Reader

Quick little drabble while I wait for my train to get here 😁

The pain in your shoulder was unbreable, it was clouding your vision and weakening your mind but you forced yourself to stay awake as your horse whipped towards the camp in Kribirsk.

On your last day of travels from Os Alta, your carriage was attacked by the Druskelle. You had taken off your kefta momentarily to inspect a broken button when you felt the movement still and shouts errupt. Your abilities did little to stop the bulletes and bayonets flung your way but you managed to help ward them off, or rather kill them all, while also hiding your very gnarly wound away from the eyes of those travelling to protect you as you slung the heavy coat back on, the damage already done.

You didn't deem yourself more important than them and although most were hurt, you had a small feeling you were seriously injured, at least enough to warrant you not fit to ride your own horse. They told you to stay in the carriage but you were stubborn. He'll kill me for being so reckless.

The smell of metal was slowly overwhelming your senses past the point of just ignoring it. The camp finally came into view just as you felt the blood seeping through your thick woolen kefta. Oh no that's not good. You pulled on the reigns and looked behind you at your small fleet, you counted them and with a shallow breath of relief that nobody got lost, you rode into the run-down camp.

Both the soldiers of the First and Second Army's stared at you as your horse urgently galloped to the Darkling's tent. You knew you didn't look good, between the blood on your kefta, the dirt on your skin and your disheveled hair, you looked as if you just went through the Fold and back. Twice.

'Ms. Y/L/N are you alright?' You hoped off the horse and let out a groan of pain, your whole left side turning completely numb now. A Grisha wearing Squaller Blue looked worried for you then his eyes widened at the sight of your shoulder and the patch of blood. You quickly distracted him.

'Get those Grisha a Healer, I think the Inferni has a broken leg' You gritted through your teeth.

'Ms.Y/L/N I think you need one too, you look like you lost a lot of blood' You tried to shrug off your kefta, the thing weighing about 30 pounds.

'Help me!' You eyed the Squaller and he obliged, gently sliding it off of your arms. You looked down at your once pristine white shirt and felt yourself get queasy for a second, it was fully crimson on its left side, small droplets of blood dripping from your fingers. How in Saint's name am I still standing.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Fedyor run into the tent, probably to inform The Darkling himself. You didn't wait for him to appear and instead walked in yourself, lifting the flap with your right hand.

There was at least 15 people in there all in a discussion but as soon as you walked in everyone stilled, eyes wide with horror. Aleksander stood at the very back with Fedyor whispering something into his ear. Too late, I'm here.

'Ms.Y/L/N we need to get you to a healer right away' The Squaller followed you, still holding your bloody kefta.

'EVERYONE OUT' Aleksander took no time in rushing over to you,

'Get her a Healer' he shouted as you leaned against him for support.

'The Druskelle attacked and I wasn't wearing my kefta, sorry' You said before he could blame anyone else for this. It was your own stupid fault.

'I really don't care right now Y/N you’re hurt. Please just let me heal it.' He spoke hurriedly as he slowly sunk to his knees, taking you with him, gently laying you down on your good side. He looks so cute when he's worried.

'You know what I think I'm fine I can't even feel any pain anymore.' You felt weird and loopy and so tired.

'For Saint's Sake your in shock. Keep your eyes open and on me' You looked up at him and focused on his frown lines. He needs to smile more.

'How long have you been bleeding?' He inspected the wound thoroughly.

'Oh, I don't even know when I got hit' You chuckled. So tired.

The flap opened and a young healer raced through the door.

'Her shoulder' Aleksander barked.

She immediately got to work and it itched so badly. You groaned and had to bite your hand to prevent it from going to scratch her work and disturb the area. Just when you thought you were going to rip yourself out of her grasp, it was over. But you still felt super tired.

'There' She sighed and got up to leave but you stopped her

'Am I still going to be this tired?'

'Sadly yes, I can't help with that much blood loss'

'Oh alright, thank you' You huffed and rested your head back on the ground, finally relaxing when you felt his hand rip open the shirt you were wearing.

'HEY!'

'It's soaked in your blood' He got up and threw it away but not before taking off his own kefta and putting it around you. He lifted you off the ground and walked over to a makeshift bed, carefully placing you down and leaving a tender kiss against your forehead.

'When you wake you can tell me all about what happened.' and turned around to let you sleep.

'Wait no, Please hold me. It’s been a day.' You asked, more like demanded.

He looked at you with loving eyes and lowered himself onto the bed, cradling you in his arms. You faintly seen a streak of your blood on his hand. Oops.

‘Are you mad?’ You whispered.

‘Yes because I know rightfully well that they told you to stay in your carriage but you were being stubborn’

You pulled away and looked at him square in the face ‘how could you possibly of known that’

‘I know you better than you know yourself Darling’ he pulled you back and exhaled deeply into your hair. ‘So stubborn’ he thought.

Taglist (tell me if u want to be added!)

@theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld @0-artemis @exo-1204 @staradorned

#shadow and bone #imagine #the darkling #grisha #the darkling x reader #alexander morozova #alexander #alina starkov #ben barnes #fanfic

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heybeybey · 3 years

Text

Promises

I should probably be working on the three multichaps I've been balancing but ehehe oh well *throws a new fic to the fandom*

Summary: As the Scouts gear up to retake Shiganshina, Captain Levi makes a promise to the mother of his child. [Canonverse where Petra lives]

Words: 1,425

Pairing: Rivetra | Levi x Petra

- - -

“I’m marrying you when I get back.”

His voice was a hush, but the words were loud enough to make Petra pause on her self-imposed task to saddle in his horse. He’s sure that he’d scolded her for the nth time already, telling her that it’s not her job to do so.

Not now when she’s three months into her pregnancy.

It all started the same night after the 57th expedition. Their squad’s death led to passionate sighs and grief-stricken fucks in his office. This was promptly followed by nervous stutters the morning after.

They decided to never talk about it ever again, not when they’re anticipating Petra’s upcoming promotion to become his second-in-command with her being the remaining veteran in his team. The last thing he wants is people questioning the position that she more than deserved.

Three weeks later and Levi found himself barreling towards fatherhood.

He’d always considered himself a callous man, but seeing the heartbroken look on Petra’s face when she had no choice but to step down from his squad had been more than enough to break something inside him.

It was his very first time to sleep with a woman then and he’d already fucked it all up, and now he’d dragged his best subordinate down with him.

Levi had left the choice all up to her, not really knowing how to approach Petra when they weren’t even together. All he could do was promise to support her in whatever decision she’d take.

But Petra was insistent, her face fearful but voice filled with resolve when she announced that she’s keeping the child. Their child.

“Levi, you don’t have to,” Petra reasons, her hand now cradled on top of her rounding belly. “I’ve told you as much before.”

Levi gives a cursory glance at his surroundings, seeing both soldiers and the only civilians in on the plan buzz around preparing for the Scouts’ biggest mission yet. He hesitates for a moment, not used to showing any type of affection in public, but he still reaches out to tuck a stray copper hair behind her ear, his finger lingering and trailing down the back of her earlobe.

Petra visibly shivers, and it takes them both back to the night their child was conceived.

An accident, but to the both of them, not a mistake.

Not when he’d see Petra light up with the kid’s every kick after the initial discomfort on her face. Not when he’d enter the apartment he’s renting for her and how it always felt like he was coming home.

She used to stay back with her father in Karanese but after the Military Police started targeting her with rumors of Levi’s involvement in her pregnancy, he made sure to drop by and hide her away in the most secure spot he could find near the Scouts’ HQ before he went on the run.

Petra was not happy with being treated like a porcelain doll, and he’d had to buy her grilled chicken with goat cheese and a slice of cheesecake as she nagged him down. Damn woman had been too obsessed with cheese since they learned she’s pregnant, but he’d found it more endearing than annoying.

He knew then that he’s probably too far gone.

Fatherhood was never a part of his plan, but he’d be damned first before he allows this child to be fatherless and leave the woman who’d always stood by him hanging.

Levi had never defined his relationship with Petra. For so long, she was his subordinate and she’d been brave enough to push past the boundaries to offer friendship. She became his lover for a night, the next thing he knows, she’s the mother of his child.

He wants more of her. He wants it all. A family, a house he’d come home to after each mission, a kid eager to welcome him back and a wife who’d kiss him and ask about how his day went.

Was he in love? Who the hell knows. He’d never been in a relationship before to even have a direct comparison. His shitty childhood didn’t help at all. But one thing he’s sure of is that whatever Petra’s willing to give him, he’d gladly take it.

“Who says I feel like I have to?” Levi finally replies as he pulls out something from his pocket, placing it on her palm. “Here.”

The ring was a simple copper band, and a box couldn’t even be seen in sight. He’d bought it during Historia’s coronation and it was the only piece of quality jewelry he could find that won’t completely blow the budget he’d set out for her and the upcoming baby.

It’s a cheap-ass ring, but Petra cradles the band in her hand as if it’s worth a thousand gold coins.

“I don’t want to tie you down,” Petra argues, tears now welling in her eyes the more she gazes at the ring on her palm. “You willing to raise him is more than enough—”

“Oi, kid,” Levi said, kneeling down on one knee to level his face with her growing belly. Petra’s breath hitches, amber eyes blinking wide at how the captain was willing to show his soft side when he’d always hidden behind a stony demeanor. “Your mom’s being stubborn. Can you ask her if she can marry me? Maybe she’d listen to you. She’d been insubordinate since you popped up.”

Levi gives her a pointed look, although he spares her a playful quirk of his lip.

He notices that the other soldiers were sneaking glances at them now, while the 104th brats were full on staring at the scene. Levi throws them all a glare to mind their fucking business, which draws out a quiet chuckle from the woman before him when they see Eren and Jean scamper off.

“You’re going to be a great father,” Petra notes, before quietly adding, “And husband.”

He snaps up, eyes as soft as it’s intense as he looks at her, “Is that a yes?”

She bites her lip, the sunrise illuminating her cheek makes her blush all the more breathtaking. She carefully slips the copper ring on her finger, and Levi couldn’t help himself from raising her hand to give a soft kiss on the back of her palm.

“Maybe you can take me out on a date first when you get back from Shiganshina?” She asks as she straightens the cravat underneath his scout cape.

“Levi, time to go,” Erwin calls out from behind them. Hange was busy rambling to Moblit while the newer squad leaders herd all their new recruits for a final briefing of each team.

Petra looks at the horizon, at the way the green expanse meets the golden glow of the rising sun. He sees how the melancholy sparked in her eyes for a second when she takes a glance at all the other Scouts, and Levi felt that familiar tinge of guilt—the self-hatred that he’d done this to her even when both parties were consenting.

He leans down, giving her a kiss on her forehead and runs a thumb against her lower lip. He doesn’t know boundaries at this moment. They’d never fucked or even kissed since that night, but as she melts into his touch right now, he hopes to whoever deity’s out there that he’s doing something right.

“I’ll find a restaurant where you can eat all the cheese and chocolate that you want,” he promises instead.

“You better. You just proposed,” she teases him, but her voice betrays her as Levi hears the familiar nervous hitch in her tone. “I can’t be a widow when I’m not even married yet.”

It’s stupid to make such a promise, especially with how risky this mission is compared to all their previous attempts. But for the first time since he joined the scouts, Levi has this unwavering resolve that he is going to come back. Whatever it takes, he’ll come back.

He’d kill all the fucking titans if that meant his kid won’t grow up without a dad.

His hands settles on Petra’s waist to reassure both her and the child growing inside her, “I’ll be back here in no time.”

#rivetra #levi x petra #petra x levi #rivetra fic #levi ackerman #petra ral #rivetra au #writing's been hard recently because work's been draining so I'm trying to write short fics in between so i won't get too rusty lol

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levisgirll · 3 years

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hi mina! i'm back again to make a request for you because you write so wonderfully i can't-! it's okay if you don't want to write it tho :D

may i ask for some prince jean headcanons/scenario? maybe something like the reader is his maid or modist, and he's kinda in love :D (this is just an idea, feel free to modify, i trust in your magical writing skills!)

sorry for this messy request and thanks! take breaks and care sweetie <3

𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐮𝐭𝐲 (𝐉𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐊𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐢𝐧 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐨𝐲𝐚𝐥 𝐀𝐔)

text: omg HII ANTI <3 I’m glad ur back with another request and I would happily write this for you cutie c; thank you for also finding my work nice ahh this really makes me happy that someone out there likes my writing and ideas djkjsk 🥺❤️❤️ okay but this is such a cute idea- its my first time writing a royal au so i hope it turned out okay and u liked it :,) make sure to also take care of yourself too bae 😌✨ okay I decided to make the reader a strong willed bodyguard instead of a maid cause I had some ideas for that instead so I hope that's alright 😭

synopsis: y/n has started to work for the kirstein royal family and due to their many great skills, abilities, attention to detail, and great self defense training, y/n was hired and trusted to be prince jean’s personal bodyguard! They have always admired prince jean and how handsome he is, later did they know not only y/n is developing feelings for jean but so does he, and he falls in love with y/n instantly! Although, something happens along the way....

fluff, lil bit mention of blood/knife, royal au ♡ —

Erwin has hired you to join the Kirstein royal family army, after two years training to be a solider to defend the country against the Jaegerists which were a rebel faction that wanted Eren to be the next king instead and to create a ‘New Jaeger Empire’. Also, wanting to protect the prince, which was one of your goals. You really admired prince Jean of how affectionate, kind, honest, and straightforward he is, you wanted to stay and be loyal to him.

Everything changes though when you graduated from the military training with your friends Connie and Sasha. Erwin had suddenly made you prince Jean’s personal bodyguard. “With your great skills y/n, and how loyal and strong you are, I think you will be a perfect choice to have the role as his personal bodyguard!”

You stood there, shocked, and your eyes were wide open. “M-Me Commander?....Of course! I would be honored to!” You will finally see jean, and be by his side! The thought of that would make your cheeks go red...it’s cause you are loyal to him right?

Erwin escorted you and took you to Prince jean who you spotted was sitting on the dinner table hall. “Erwin...! Huh? Who’s that?” Jean was quick to notice your presence, and he was quite taken aback with your presence.

“Your new personal bodyguard Prince Jean. With how bad the situation is going, you never know who will come and attack you. So, Y/N here is going to be by your side and make sure they protect you. If you also ever need anything, you can ask Y/N.” Erwin patted on your back and you went forward and saluted to Jean. “A-At your service Prince Jean!”

“O-Oh...alright then, whatever.” He got up and walked past you both, leaving the dinning hall, you could have sworn you saw his cheeks went a bit red. “He is usually like this at the beginning, but he seems to like you!”

As the days passed, you and Prince Jean actually got along pretty well which made your bond stronger. He seemed to be the kind of person who wouldn't care from the outside, but you realized he cared about everyone and when it came to you...he would always ask if you are doing well. Things seemed to be fine at the moment, for now.

“Young master! You have a meeting with the chairman at Trost District soon.” You said as you were next to Jean, catching up with his pace. “Okay, let's get going then!” He gave you a grin which made you blush, as the both of you approached the carriage, he went ahead and opened the door for you! “Well, are you getting in or not?” You felt all eyes on you, and heard some gasps. ‘It should be the other way around!’ you thought as you got inside while feeling so embarrassed.

You were both alone sitting down in the carriage and you could feel Jean’s eyes all over you, “Young mas-” you were stunned when he held your hands and you looked at his eyes that was searching your gaze. “Don't call me that when we are alone....Didn’t I tell you that?” You couldn't hold it, you were a blushing mess now!

“Okay...J-Jean, why did you do that? People will get the wrong idea..” Lately, Jean has been very affectionate towards you, although you had to admit you had a crush on him, but you could never say that to him.

“So? Y/N...I don't care what others think about us, I care about what you think instead.” He started to caress your hands while still looking at your eyes, “M-Me?” He nodded, waiting for your answer but you pushed away gently and looked away. “Well, it’s my duty...to protect you and serve you.” You tried to change the subject while still looking outside the window, but....you noticed something off? Where is this carriage heading too?

“No! Y/N that’s not it...I meant I...” He came closer to you, too close to your face while he was blushing madly, you touched his chest to try and push him back a bit, and you felt his heart beat like crazy. Is he...nervous?

“Jean. Not now I-” As you tried to finish what you were trying to say, the carriage stopped suddenly which made you and Jean fall. “What the hell?” He yelled out and looked at you immediately, full of concern. “Are you okay?”

“Young master stay inside!” Before he could stop you, you open the carriage door and stepped out, while shutting it tight. You brought your sword out and examined the area and situation. ‘The carriage man is gone...we are in the woods...and I sense someone, but who?!’

“Come out, whoever you are...or perhaps you are a Jaegerist?” As soon as you said that, a sword was seen to be thrown out at you and you quickly stopped it by slashing it to hit on the other direction with your long strong sword.

“Hmph, you seem to be smart.” You head turned quick to the direction where you heard the voice. You saw a middle aged man with a tousled auburn hair “And? Who the fuck is asking?” You pointed your sword at him with a stoic expression, showing him no fear. “It’s Floch, and if you could do me a favor how about you just leave and let me deal with the Prince okay?”

You let out a chuckle, then gave him a death glare. “Make me.”

“Fuck, you are stubborn, let me just finish you off!! Don't you get it? This crappy prince doesn't deserve to be the next king to rule us!! It should be Eren!” He yelled out and brought out a knife and charged at you, you put your sword away and decide to do hand-to-hand combat on him. You took your stance and when he was near you, Y/N pushed the knife down and then quickly did the grappling technique, which took him down completely.

“Young Master! Call the headquarters for backup, we were tricked and put in a trap!” You said as you were trying to hold on to Floch, not letting him escape. “O-On it!”

“It’s quiet....too quiet no way this guy came alon-” You looked up and you saw someone charging at you with their sword, she was fast and you quickly got up and brought your sword to stop her attack for defense.

‘F-Fuck...that was close.’ You backed away and looked at the carriage, ‘He needs to be safe...’ you wondered and started to worry.

“About fucking time Mikasa!” Floch shouted out as he rubbed his hands which you held on tightly earlier. “Wait...I know you! Ackerman right? It's a privilege to meet you.” Mikasa Ackerman, she was one of the Ackerman that stood behind and did not serve the Kirstein royal family, but instead stood by Eren’s side and believed in him.

“And your Y/N, the strong bodyguard. Please step aside.” She sounded very serious and looked strong. The rumors were true, she did neglect the royal family and went with the Jaegerists rebel group.

‘Ha...who would have known this mission would be a complete disaster!’ You thought and as you were preparing to attack, until Jean came out of the carriage with his sword and pointed at them. “Don't Hurt Y/N!!”

Your eyes widened as you turned your head to look at him. “Young Master! What the hell are you doing? Don’t come out and run away!”

“B-But...” Jean stuttered and looked at you, he did not want to leave you behind and run like a coward, leaving behind....the most important person to him that he cared about the most. “No! I promised to protect you, so ru-” Being distracted by Jean, everything now seem to have stopped for you and there was a pitch silence. You looked in front of you and felt what seemed like a dagger stabbed towards your side waist, blood was dripping and the one who stabbed you was Floch!

“Floch...! Why?! That was not part of the plan!” Mikasa yelled out, and what seemed to be shocked by his action. Everything was going too quickly for you, you placed your hand on his shoulder and shoved him away which made him fall back. You gripped your waist and yelled out, “I-If it’s meant to protect the Prince...Then come at me!”

You heard lot’s of horses approaching and you finally spotted Erwin’s squad who finally came for backup. You noticed Levi by Erwin’s side and as soon as he saw you bleeding, he got provoked and got off from his horse and charged at Mikasa. “An Ackerman with an Ackerman, Hm? Traitor, let me deal with you.”

You let out a sigh, now knowing the Prince is safe and Levi and Erwin’s squad was here to help you guys out. Jean ran towards you and held on to you as you fell down on your knees “Y-Y/N!!”

“Why....Why didn’t you run away?” You said softly and trying to stay conscious, Jean quickly placed his hand on your cheek while the other arm was used to hold your body, “Cause I care about you Damnit!”

You gave him a weak smile and held on his hand that was placed on your cheek, “Did I do...my best to serve you?” Was all you could say and you slowly passed out due to the blood loss you had and you heard Jean's voice drifted slowly.

After a couple of hours have passed, you woke up what seemed to be in a hospital, and you were wrapped around bandages. You moved a bit which made you wince at the pain from your side abdomen.

“Don’t move around! You are still injured and you haven’t healed yet.” A girl with long beautiful blonde hair said, full of concern in her tone as she came closer to you and checked up on you. Her large blue eyes were examining your injury to see if the wound was closed up. “A-And you are?”

“I’m Historia! A nurse who is looking after you. Doctor Hanji told me to stay by your side until you wake up.” She said with a big smile and she looked like an angel to you.

“W-Where is the Prince! Is he okay?!” You said all worried and started to panic. “Haha, Don't worry! He is fine, thanks to you protecting him! He told me to notify him when you wake up but I think you need to rest a bit longer.”

You let out a sigh, ‘At least he is fine...but I want to see him.’ You wondered and looked outside the window to let your thoughts run around your mind as you slowly closed your eyes to rest.

“Y/N...Hey Y/N wake up.” You felt a rub against your shoulders and you opened your eyes to see Prince Jean looking down at you with a relief escaping his mouth. “I’m glad you are looking fine, but are you doing okay?”

You slowly got up which Jean held on your arm for support, “Y-Yea, thanks for stopping by...Jean.” You were blushing at how he suddenly started to caress your arm, then up your shoulders. He went in closer and gave you a tight hug around your shoulders. “Damn it! I thought I was gonna lose you today, that’s it...I'm not backing away with this anymore.” He pulled back, and was looking at your face. “J-Jean...What do you mea-”

“Y/N, I love you. I loved you ever since I first saw you coming and you were always by my side, but in a way that made me feel calm, good and I felt your warmth all the time it would make me fall for you even more everyday...Being with you feels right to me!” He stopped talking and looked away, he was clearly embarrassed on what he just said, the prince was confessing to you and he was finally saying that he was falling in love with you!

You were shocked, was he actually saying this all? Was the Prince actually confessing to you? You couldn't help yourself but smile to what he said and you finally held his hands, “I...I feel the same way too!” You let out now a big smile and tears started to form on your eyes, you felt so happy and so did he.

He looked behind to make sure the door was closed and then looked back at you who was now approaching your face closely and he started to give you a passionate kiss, you held on his hands while he was holding your face, lifting it up and he kept on kissing you. The night had a nice cold breeze and the window was slightly open which made the wind come in and that made your hair flow slowly as you both continued to kiss slowly and gently.

Jean pulled back and you both were breathing heavily, by the looks of it, you could tell you were Jean’s first kiss. He wanted to kiss you again and again, “I’m now love sick cause of you.”

The night went out so peacefully and you both enjoyed each others company while holding hands and caressing each others cheeks when talking about various topics and he went on explaining how brave and strong you were today when you stood up and fought against Floch and Mikasa. He found your confidence very attractive. He felt like a lucky man to have you by his side and he promised you that after he becomes king he would make you his.

𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐮𝐬 : Usually in the evenings, he would sneak into your place because he begged that he wanted to see you and stay at your place for a couple of hours to cuddle and kiss you. It was his favorite place in the world cause it was just y/n and him, alone. “Okay Jean, you have to go now!” You said blushing at how clingy Jean was towards you, hugging your waist. “Please just another 5 minutes babe, besides come on it’s just you and me tonight.” Jean would say playfully while he would give you a soft kiss on your scar that was on your waist ♥

okay but this was a really fun royal au I wrote up and I'm kinda glad how the first time I'm writing it went well! thanks anti for the request again and I hope you liked it <3 and if anyone else did please then leave a like or a reblog! it would mean a lot c:

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