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#and it’s an issue! It’s really alienating!
sadokasochism · 2 days
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I am destroyed over the whole god/worshipper dynamic and have no idea how to adequately put it into words.
I mentioned in another post that Mizi could not fathom Sua ACTUALLY dying, or comprehend what death really meant, and attributed this to her relatively comfortable and sheltered life as the pet of Shine. She was not taught to conceptualise death as a loss, and she never faced any opposition to that world view. From what we know, she might have never really known true, lasting pain or loss before the end of Round 1.
However, her reaction could also be due to her placing Sua on a pedestal as her personal god and universe. She viewed Sua as her absolute everything, and why would any faithful worshipper believe their god could be killed? Only, while Sua was everything to HER, that perception did not carry over to their captors. Mizi's love and devotion was not enough to save Sua. Forces stronger than them both took her away like she was nothing.
How must Mizi have felt, having her perception of Sua as the centre of the universe shattered that way? Coming to the violent realisation that Sua was just another human, and that humans are indeed that vulnerable and disposable? That Sua could now only exist in memories and in the visions that haunt her? That Sua is not a god, but a ghost?
Now we look at Till's perception of Mizi. Again, in an earlier post I mentioned the tragedy of Till falling for someone who did not have a reason to leave. He had a lot of blind faith in Mizi, and it could be said that he idealised her as a paragon.
It's not hard to see how he reached this point. The poor kid had not been shown a lot of kindness in his life, and so meeting someone who was genuinely good and so full of joy must have had a huge impact on him.
However, his faith is still a blind one, but in a different way to Mizi's blind faith in Sua. He is happy to endure any amount of horrible treatment and does not expect anyone to help him. He doesn't resent Mizi for being so close to their captors, for her dreams stopping at Alien Stage. He doesn't resent her after he gives up on his chance at freedom and is subjected to who knows how many more years of pain and torment at the hands of their captors (Not that Mizi is at fault, Till made his own decision that Mizi likely never even knew about).
He sees Mizi's innocence and ignorance to the cruelty of their reality as something wonderful instead of a character flaw that prevents her from saving herself or her loved ones.
Sua has the same issue, seeking comfort and bliss within Mizi's brightness instead of acknowledging the cruel reality of their world. Maybe she felt sharing her perspective with Mizi would dim Mizi's bright spirit, and so she was more than content to wait out the clock with her god.
Maybe Sua felt that meeting Mizi, loving her and being loved by her in return, was nothing short of a miracle after the life she had lived before Anakt Garden. Maybe she felt in light of that, aspiring for something like freedom or a long, long life of happiness with the person she loved the most was asking far too much. The time she got with Mizi was already a miracle, why expect or demand anything more?
If Sua was afraid of Mizi losing her brightness, no wonder she was so affected by Ivan's lecture about becoming a source of trauma for Mizi after her death.
Ivan's view of Till as his god is a bit different. He is similar in that he doesnt seem to demand his devotion be reciprocated, he just wants his god to acknowledge him as a person, as someone that is at least PART of Till's universe, if he can't be all of it.
He is also very willing to become a martyr for his god while expecting nothing in return but Till continuing to live. He acknowledges Till as vulnerable and falable in a way that Till doesn't with Mizi, and Mizi didn't with Sua. He knows damn well that while Till is the centre of HIS universe, their captors certainly do not hold Till in that same regard. He knows that love and devotion in a vacuum does not save anyone.
Which is why he was always the one to free Till, to try and escape with him, and why he pulled the stunt he did in Round 6. Ivan knew that actually making an impact in this world required personal risk and sacrifice, because their captors don't give a fuck if you're in love or if that other pet-human they're about to kill means everything to you.
Till knew this too, but his idealised version of Mizi is too perfect to be broken and beaten down by this world the same way the rest of them have been. So he's still shattered by Round 5, seeing how far Mizi has fallen and then not knowing if she's alive or dead, but knowing for sure she is far out of reach. I wonder, did he regret not running away with Ivan at that point? Did he wonder what all those years of suffering were for, if he was just going to end up losing Mizi anyway? If this world was able to break her too, no matter what he did?
Mizi is gone and changed forever, and nothing he did could stop it. His love and devotion and sacrifice wasn't enough. He failed his god.
In Round 6, Ivan is faced with the same thing. His god has lost his fighting spirit, is changed forever, and Ivan's love and devotion wasn't enough to save him. The last thing he can give is his life, and hope that will be enough. Just like Sua. But he was never Till's god, was never even part of his universe, he probably won't even leave a ghost behind. So, the choice is obvious, really.
They're all so desperate for hope and connection in this lonely, painful existence that they make a person their entire universe, and then are repeatedly crushed when they are shown again and again that their soul-consuming love for one another is seemingly meaningless in a world that views them as infinitely disposable.
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grissomesque · 1 day
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The thing about "Worst Case Scenario" is that Seska rewriting a program to torture and ultimately murder Tuvok for his "betrayal" of the Maquis suggests that she was loyal to the Maquis, and not only because of her feelings for Chakotay. She would've had to booby trap the program before "State of Flux," because she's under intense scrutiny then and there's not really enough time anyway. Which suggests to me that she was fueled by real rage: if Tuvok had reopened the program, and been killed by it, how could she have possibly gotten away with it? She wasn't planning to leave at that point, and (!) she specifically depicts herself as Bajoran, not, in some big gotcha moment, as Cardassian:
When Seska returns in this episode [...] the holographic Seska also slightly differs, in appearance, from how the actual Seska ever looked. "We […] see Seska in an incarnation we had never really seen her in before," Martha Hackett commented. "They changed everything – her hair and costume – because it's her creation in the hologram." (Star Trek Monthly issue 34, p. 40)
(Emphasis mine)
This, coupled with her big speech in "State of Flux," makes me wonder whether she would've ever revealed herself as Cardassian, if she hadn't been caught. She seems still to believe in the superiority of Cardassia ("If this had been a Cardassian ship, we would be home now!"), yet follows up with,
"I did it for you. I did it for this crew. We are alone here, at the mercy of any number of hostile aliens, because of the incomprehensible decision of a Federation captain. A Federation captain who destroyed our only chance to get home. Federation rules. Federation nobility. Federation compassion? Do you understand? [...] We must begin to forge alliances. To survive, we must have powerful friends."
We are alone. We must have powerful friends. I don't know how this has never occurred to me, but textually speaking, with the notable exception of Incomprehensible Federation Captain Janeway, Seska seems deeply invested in the community she is ultimately forced to leave. It's, actually, a kind of reverse Ro Laren situation. What a twist.
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magiccath · 2 days
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Weirdly specific headcanons Pt. 2 (Tenth Doctor x Reader)
a/n: finals fried my brain again, have some headcanons (new fics coming soon, I promise)
Says stuff like “2+2=5” with such confidence that you almost believe him
Secretly likes it when you and Donna call him “spaceman”
His favorite Earth snack is Goldfish (especially the colored ones)
Insufferable to watch movies with because he corrects everything
Traces words in circular Gallifreyan on your skin, usually on the back of your hand
Things like “I love you” and various nicknames he has for you
Often times when he fixes the TARDIS it doesn’t really need it, he just likes having something to do
Similarly, the TARDIS creates issues so he has to fix them
His love language is quality time, he just wants to be with you
Having you sit in the room while he fixes the TARDIS, showing you every single part of the universe, laying in bed on lazy days, etc
Needs constant reassurance and love
Cuddles too
Might not remember things like your birthday without reminders from the TARDIS
However, he knows exactly how you like your tea, your favorite color, and every single nervous tic you have
900+-year-old toddler 
Requires constant supervision or he will cause harm to himself and/or others
Is absolute rubbish at cooking. Something always ends up burnt 
Makes a mean cuppa though
He loves all kinds of cuddles but he really likes it when the two of you fall asleep spooning
Big fan of wrapping his entire body around you and tangling his limbs with yours
Also goes crazy for a good hug
Maybe his love language is also touch
He likes sitting on the floor for some reason, especially the TARDIS floor
Sits in chairs really weird too. Practically drapes himself across them with his long limbs sticking out and over the chair.
Has boundless amounts of energy. Is it a Time Lord thing or ADHD? We’ll never know (It’s both)
Knows enough random stuff to win Jepordy, but he would epically fail at it
Would correct every single answer and argue that he was right, not the answer sheet.
“Mount Rainier isn’t a volcano, fire aliens were just living under it.”
Loves ABBA and Queen. Can be often caught singing their songs to himself, especially when getting ready
Has a little troll doll collection in his room, among other strange 90s toys and random objects he likes
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i can't think of a creative title
👽 for finding later because look at him he's a little alien :D
so anyway i (15F) had this girlfriend (16F) a little bit ago. we honestly didn't do much together, even though we're both in high school. never went on a proper date and we never even kissed.
whenever i would try to set up a date or anything, she'd kinda be like "ok." and then never follow up and i wouldn't wanna do it because i have really bad self esteem issues and i didn't want her to stop liking me because i was being too clingy or anything.
we were texting like normal one day and she just sent me this text where she was like "i'm literally so selfish lmaooo i already knew i was gonna break up with you by the end of the school year but here i am still dating you and wanting to kiss you 🤪" and i just stopped texting her right there because. because what? she was literally planning to break up with me and she knew what day she was going to do it and everything? then what was the point of even getting together with me? because she knew i really liked her and still did that.
anyway, we agreed to talk during our free period/study hall at school the day after. i had totally freaked myself out and i was completely prepared to just go and apologize over and over again, even if she was in the wrong, but when i met her, she immediately started talking about how i put her on too much of a pedestal and how my self esteem was too low and how i have a tendency to say "im gonna fucking kill myself" (not in like a serious way or anything but it just became a thing i'd say sometimes, we both knew that i wasn't being serious about hurting myself but i see why that would make her uncomfortable and it's actually a habit i've been trying to stop) and these are actually all pretty valid concerns. i did have a little bit of a tendency to put her on a pedestal because of my previously mentioned terrible self esteem. so we broke up.
but then a little recently, a friend, who i'll call miku texts me and she's talking about how my ex, i'll call her uh... rin? anyway, rin texts miku and rin allegedly said that she thinks that she's more mature than all of our friend group ( we mainly have the same friend group, me and rin are still friends) and miku tells me that (also allegedly) miku wasn't really all that affected at all when we broke up or even when i randomly stopped texting her after that text. so. idk. was i the asshole? i feel bad about ghosting her, that was kinda toxic and abusive and definitely something i shouldn't have done, but it freaked me out.
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honeybleed · 3 days
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ARCHIVED.
I’ve had a lot of thought about this but I figured it’s time. I joined Tumblr not as somebody new because I’ve been on this app before. But as a writing blog inspired by amazing black authors who wrote for anime that I loved. I’ve given those girls their flowers and there was a real sense of community.
But I’d say the first two months of 2024 on Tumblr was the roughest. I can take accountability, I know I have not handled things the greatest. I have a pattern of fall outs and I have an abrasive personality. I have opinions that differ and I’m stubborn. That being said, the way I was treated by a lot of authors on here in the name of “kinks” and “dark content” when I merely said minors shouldn’t be involved with adult fantasies on here is and was unacceptable.
A lot of the people I disagreed with regarding that issue following Ezra and Tee either blocked me completely and probably sent around my user to their friends so I’m blocked by a LOT of authors on here because they think I’m a purist who hates dark content and it’s not a nice feeling. There’s really no point of me even being here if I’m treated like some social pariah and people want nothing to do with me. Actively attempting to alienate and push me out because I care about children welfare (yes, even fictional ones)
Lack of engagements which I know everybody experiences on here especially now fuels this too. I’m bitter, I know I write well but I notice I’m always the one trying to encourage other authors.
I don’t feel happy on here. Writing has always been my hobby but the fact I can’t even put anons on because I get a slew of slurs is not okay. What I answered differed greatly from what was truly in my inbox. I had a lot, and the humiliation of people tormenting my mutuals about me was just…yeah. Nobody can say my writing is bad or my blog is ugly. Nobody debates or argues with me. It’s straight to dehumanisation by calling me slurs. Like I’ve said before, as a child I experienced extreme racism in England so I guess slurs shouldn’t bother me.
But I guess what gets me is that everybody on here pretends to be all “uwu baby soft me and my blorbo” with the kaomojis and pastel pink but I know it’s mostly likely them. There was even a subpost regarding a post from Monica talking about the racial abuse we suffered and a majority of popular authors were laughing in the comments.
This is not about dark content. This is not about aging up because frankly i don’t care. i filtered out certain characters names n just went about my day, I spoke my peace about how I choose not to do that so do not use me as some soap box about that cos I’m not fighting battles cos people can’t do that themselves.
It’s not all negative. I love every friend I’ve made! I’m grateful for all the people who liked my work and made works I love. I’m happy I met so many people, I’ve laughed with them. In all the fall outs I’ve been in, I still have a certain degree of love for people I no longer talk to. If you want my disc just dm, I’ll still be around to read!
Deuces! I had fun!
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bluestockingbaby · 10 months
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tired of the posts floating around about Two-Face being a fun uncle to the Robins. It’s kind of a cute non-canon idea, but they do all hate that motherfucker and they’re right to do so.
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knifefightandchill · 7 months
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why do you reject serenity?
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spookygibberish · 23 days
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Dogstock are typical of what are often deemed the ‘evil’ races in many other fantasy works. They were created by some higher force to be slaves, they are carnivorous by nature, they resemble animals other than human in dentition and build. They growl and bite and walk behind.
The Uhasr (a dogstock culture) are descendants of such slave-infantry that was abandoned when the empire that used them to capture the steppes decided the land wasn’t so profitable after all, and more pressing matters drew their attention elsewhere. Like tools left spent on the ground, the unneeded, excess dogstock were left to survive on their own in Hochkiskuph. The native peoples, of course, did not welcome them any more, or see them any less as oppressors when the hand released the lead. To the Hochkiskuph peoples, the Uhasr are a predatory ghost, an echo that consumes them even in absentia. To the Uhasr, one human is much like another, differing in number and equipment, but never in essence. Uhasr are a species of wild animal with a human face. Humans are prey on two legs. Humans smoke and poison uncovered dens on principle, Uhasr abduct and consume men and women and children all the same.
A common trend I have noticed in media which aims to humanize monsters, is that it often relies on passivity. Humanity is contingent upon kindness. The monster that is A Person only so long as they are a harmless thing at heart, something which can be understood and befriended. Their violence is reluctant, their hearts noble. Grace is a concession to the dominated. Only the toothless beast, declawed and pinioned and caged, is one which has earned its personhood. The ontological enemy supersedes the ontological man.
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sahrabarik · 2 years
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he's had dick for 3 weeks and he's already turning into a dad
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autisticaradiamegido · 6 months
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day 299
cha boy is starting on a cpap machine for the first time tonight
it turns out, that when i sleep, my cringe-ass larynx blocks itself up, and i STRAIGHT UP STOP BREATHING for up to 20 seconds at a time! of course i have always managed to start back up again, but as u might imagine this doesn't lead to great sleep quality
so wish me luck on getting that Good Sleep for once. god gives his toughest battles to his sleepiest warriors and all that.
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sapphorror · 6 months
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oh
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the way i rewatch any part of rottmnt and once again come away from canon leo wondering where the actual heck are people getting this “oohhhh he only thinks he’s good for self sacrifice or as a tool, he has absolutely zero self worth whatsoever” instead of the canon version who’s kind of a manipulative lil stinker and KNOWS he has stuff to bring to the table but isn’t sure how to be Seen
it’s not that he thinks he’s worthless or not wanted. i fuckin promise you that about rise leo. he does not seriously think he is unloved or unwanted or ~one mistake away from being dropped by his own family~ or whatever
what he IS is rejection-sensitive in the way that makes any time he fails feel like the end of the world to HIM (setting aside that time he messed up and it did literally trigger the near-apocalypse and near deaths of him and his family lol), so he’d rather not try than risk messing up
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dragonanne · 5 months
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Tagged by @secretwriterstudentjaune
1) Three non-romantic duos: Hmmm...brotps I adore would be Jack and Daniel (SG-1), Sam and Daniel (SG-1), and Lune and Matsen (Jade Torch -- is it cheating to use my own book??? xD) If that's cheating, then Sam and Frodo (LotR).
2) A ship that might surprise others: I kinda ship Link x Mipha from BOTW. I like Zelda x Link too, but something about Link x Mipha is just so sweet and tragic. I like that they knew each other for a lot longer than Zelda and Link knew each other.
Let's be real. I don't have a lot of crazy ships. Although, in SG-1, I do ship Vala x Tomin (but I also like Vala x Daniel).
3) Last Song: Shackleton by Adam Young
4) Last Film: My parents and I watched Hitched for the Holidays last night. Very funny romcom with Joey Lawrence. It's a Hallmark movie from 2012, so just before they all got so unbelievably cookie cutter/copy+paste with their plots.
5) Currently reading: Operation Grendel by Daniel Schwabauer
6) Currently watching: The X-Files. I'm nearing the end of season 1. I've never seen it before, and I'm loving it!
7) Currently consuming: Coffee
8) currently craving: idk. I don't have a strong craving for anything right now.
Tagging @aceofstars16 @quiescentdragon @ryeillustrates @accidental-spice @jenniferbrincho (if any of y'all have already done it or already been tagged, my bad--my memory stinks 😅)
#i am in a massive stargate phase right now#i almost put john and rodney as the third brotp but i wanted to include something non stargate#and seriously. i am enjoying the x-files SO MUCH!!!!!!!!#the alien episodes are my favorite and i wish there were more of those and fewer of the ghost/spirit ones#but oh well#and can i say? mulder and scully's dynamic is perfection#not just how they trust each other or tease each other but how they physically behave with one another#the acting choices seem very deliberate#mulder wears his heart on his sleeve and i am living for that#and he's big on touch. not in a creepy way at all#but he's constantly putting his hand on her shoulder or gently placing his hand on her back to steer her#so much of it is 100% unnecessary for the scene so it feels like very deliberate acting choice regarding the character#and it doesn't phase scully a bit#even in the first few episodes when they've only known each other a few months or less she has no issue with how familiar mulder acts#again. i need to emphasize---it never comes across as creepy just really cute and tender#i really really like how she is SO TINY compared to him and i think his physicality and protectiveness is emphasized by that#but at the same time he knows she's fully capable#he seems protective of her but not in a demeaning way. not overprotective. just lots of chivalry and honor#that's something that seems totally lost in media today: men who want to protect women just because that's what they should be doing#and women who let them#too many women get bent out of shape when men try to be gentlemen#women have tried to wipe out chivalry and then they turn around and complain about toxic masculinity 🙄#but mulder is a wonderful gentleman and i love watching him and scully#tagged#sorry for going off in the tags but i've been wanting to rave about this stuff for a few days now xD
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savage-rhi · 8 months
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The ideal body nonbinarys want is on a spectrum from Eldtrich Horror to Jareth the Goblin King (or just David Bowie in general).
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drdemonprince · 1 year
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I get exactly what he means.
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clonerightsagenda · 2 years
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There’s so much going on in w359 season four that they find out a galactic empire wants to absorb humanity and are like well we’ll unpack that later and then they don’t.
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