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hughjidiot · 3 years

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Under Your Scars, an Amphibia Fanfiction

(TW for panic attacks. Takes place post-canon with aged-up characters.)

Marcy has been together with Anne for one year now and wants to make their anniversary special, but memories of what happened in Amphibia all those years ago threaten to bring everything crashing down.

Thankfully for Marcy, Sasha is there to hold her together while she falls apart.

AO3 Link

---

The shower knob squeaked as it was turned to the right, cutting off the steady stream of warm water. Steam filled the tiny apartment bathroom as Marcy Wu stepped out of the shower, water dripping down her in rivets, eyes shut tight. Quick as a flash the nineteen-year-old STEM major whipped the fluffy green towel off the bar beside the sink, wrapping it tightly around her torso.

It was only when she was fully covered that Marcy dared open her eyes.

She wiped the condensation away from the mirror, brushing her wet hair away from her eyes. She popped open the medicine cabinet above the sink, removing her toothbrush and toothpaste before gently closing the door. As she cleaned her teeth, the mint of the toothpaste tingling against her tongue, Marcy ran though her to-do list in her head. A paradoxical mix of anticipation and apprehension roiled in her gut.

Today was hers and Anne’s anniversary.

Marcy still couldn’t believe it had been a full year since she and Anne Boonchuy had officially started dating. A full year since Anne had first taken Marcy’s hands in her own, blushing and stuttering, asking if Marcy wanted to have dinner together that weekend. Not with Sasha as they usually did; just the two of them. Marcy had been stunned into silence, a silence that Anne had initially taken for a rejection that had her stammering out an apology looking close to tears.

Marcy’s senses had returned to her just in time, and she’d practically screamed yes, of course she’d go out with Anne.

In hindsight it seemed natural that the two girls would end up together. They’d been friends since kindergarten, complimenting each other perfectly. Anne would be the one to look out for Marcy and keep her safe, while Marcy would be the one to help Anne with the schoolwork she always struggled with. Along with their mutual friend Sasha Waybright, they completed each other, made each other whole.

Granted there had been some… complications in their adolescence. Complications that were exacerbated by circumstances that most teenagers couldn’t imagine dealing with. But in the end the three had worked through everything, coming out with a stronger friendship, a genuine friendship. A friendship that had naturally segued into romance for Anne and Marcy, with Sasha fully supportive of her oldest friends getting together.

Now it was time to celebrate one year of their relationship.

The day had gotten off to a great start already, Marcy waking up to find that Anne had already gotten up and prepared a full breakfast of all their favorite foods. They laughed and joked as they ate, finding simple joy in each other’s presence. They talked about Anne’s work and Marcy’s schooling, and how much they were looking forward to the reservation they’d made at that new Italian restaurant for dinner tonight.

Marcy felt her face heat up as she finished brushing, spitting the foamy mixture into the sink. Their dinner date wasn’t until eight in the evening, it was a little after eleven now, and Anne would be back from working the lunch shift at her parent’s restaurant around two. Meaning they’d have almost the entire day all to themselves. And Marcy wanted it to be special.

After a year together, after a year of going no further than heavy make-out sessions, she’d decided it was finally time to take things with Anne to the next level.

Feeling that her hair was dry enough, Marcy retrieved the hair dryer from the cabinet. She closed the door again, and froze at the sight of her reflection.

Her towel had slipped ever-so-slightly, exposing a triangular patch of pale-pink skin just below her collarbone, extending to underneath the fabric.

Marcy felt her breath hitch as the memories came flooding back to her.

Memories of her arguing with her parents on that autumn day.

Running from her house in tears, screaming that they were ruining her life.

Finding the Calamity Box in the pawn shop.

Remembering the book from the library, thinking it had to be a coincidence, that there’s no way it would actually work.

Then, the fateful decision: what’s the harm in trying?

Marcy felt her hands start to tremble. The memories came faster.

Standing outside the pawn shop with Sasha while Anne stole the music box.

Seeing a blinding flash when Anne opened the box at the park.

Landing in a city straight out of one of her video games.

Meeting him. The “good king” who took in a confused and frightened visitor from another world. The man who housed, studied with her, gave her a crossbow as a gift and taught her how to shoot. An adult who actually listened to what she had to say, who encouraged her to embrace her own interests rather than force his ideals on her.

Being made the head of an entire military branch. Going on thrilling missions and daring adventures, just like her favorite fantasy novels.

Then, meeting Anne again after so many months apart.

Marcy’s eyes started to burn, welling up with tears. More memories, slamming into her like a physical force.

Feeling such hope and joy as she was reunited with her oldest friend.

Showing her the city. Introducing her to King Andrias.

Doing research on the music box so that the girls could finally get home. Just like Anne wanted.

Letting her go so she could spend just a little more time with her surrogate frog family.

Watching Anne dash through the streets, leaving Marcy alone.

Then, seven words from King Andrias that would again change the course of her life: “I have a proposition for you, Marcy… ”

Marcy’s legs trembled, and she dropped the hairdryer and gripped the counter to steady herself as she tried desperately to get her breathing under control. Not helping was that the motion had caused her towel to drop further, exposing even more of that damned scar. The memories wouldn’t stop.

Travelling across Amphibia with Anne and the Plantars on a quest to charge the stones of the Calamity Box.

Meeting Sasha again after so much time apart, who seemed to have truly grown and turned over a new leaf.

Lying to both of them about going home.

Returning to Newtopia with the fully-charged box in tow.

Watching in shock as Sasha and Grime stabbed them in the back and launched a full-blown toad rebellion.

Watching in horror as Anne exploded at Sasha, ending their friendship right then and there.

Thinking that it was fine, this was fine, they’d had their spats before, Marcy could fix this like she always did.

Working with Anne, the Plantars, Yunan and Olivia to free King Andrias and crush the rebellion.

Then, the moment everything came crashing down.

Keep it together, Marcy thought to herself in the bathroom, shutting her eyes tight. She bit her bottom lip hard enough to draw blood as her mind was assaulted with sounds and images. Not today. Not today…

Listening in stunned shock to Andrias’s delusional ranting.

Watching the Calamity Box light up the castle, feeling the entire structure rise into the sky as a small army of robots seemed to show up out of nowhere.

Pleading with Andrias that this wasn’t supposed to happen, this wasn’t part of the plan.

Standing there helpless as Andrias coldly revealed the truth in front of everyone.

Desperately trying to explain things to Anne and Sasha. Sasha backing away in anger and disgust. Anne looking at Marcy with such hurt, such betrayal.

You did that to them, a voice whispered in the back of Marcy’s brain. You tore them from their homes, their lives, put them through hell. It was all you, Marcy.

Fighting Andrias’ robots alongside everyone.

Staring in horror as Andrias cruelly dropped Sprig to his death.

Diving out the window after them, whistling for Joe Sparrow to fly in and save them both. It was the least she could do. He was Anne’s best friend, after all.

Returning to the castle with Sprig in tow, watching in awe as Anne laid the hurt down on Andrias, using powers that none of the girls understood at the time.

Grabbing the music box, using it to open a portal home. Anne and the Plantars rushing through while Sasha and Grime held off Andrias.

And then.

Pain.

Pain unlike anything Marcy had ever felt.

Looking down to see the glowing tip of Andrias’s sword protruding from her chest.

Hearing the stone-cold voice of the man she thought she could trust: “Now look what you made me do.”

Pain.

Using her last breath to apologize as her body went numb.

Pain.

Hearing Anne’s anguished cry as the world around Marcy faded away.

Pain pain pain such horrible pain-

Marcy practically ripped the medicine cabinet open, grabbing her anti-panic attack medication. She untwisted the cap and, despite her shaking, managed to get a single pill out and popped it into her mouth. She slammed the cabinet door shut and turned on the faucet, collecting water in her cupped hands and taking a huge gulp.

Unfortunately, her rapid movements sent the towel tumbling to the floor, leaving that goddamned scar on full display.

An ugly, thick, jagged line of pale-pink, starting below her collarbone, crossing down over her heart and ending just below her right breast.

A permanent reminder of the biggest mistake of Marcy’s life. A mistake that had nearly gotten her killed. Almost got her friends killed. Could have killed them at several points, if things had gone just a little bit differently.

Aside from the doctors she’d seen when their adventure in Amphibia was over, she’d never shown anyone the full scar. Not her parents, not Sasha, not even Anne.

In her mind’s eye she saw Anne staring at her bare chest, recoiling in shock and horror from the sight of the scar. A reminder of the one who uprooted Anne from everything she knew on her thirteenth birthday and dropped her into a hostile new world that had almost killed her multiple times.

She heard Anne’s words from all those years ago echo in her ears: “How could you?! I’ve been missing my family, my life!”

Marcy tore out of the bathroom, eyes shut against the sting of her tears. She sprinted to the bedroom and threw herself onto the bed, not daring to open her eyes until she had pulled the comforter over her still-damp form and covered her scar. Her breathing was heavy and ragged, her vision was blurry, her heart slammed against her ribcage, and a sensation of pins and needles settled in her hands and feet.

Marcy curled herself tight into a ball on the bed she shared with Anne. Sweet, kind, wonderful Anne who was hard at work right now, who would walk through the front door in just a few hours expecting to spend a magical anniversary with her girlfriend.

That thought did little to calm Marcy down.

She reached for her phone on the nightstand. It wasn’t easy with her hands trembling the way they were, but she managed to pull up Sasha’s name and hit the call button. Marcy waited for what felt like an eternity as the phone rang until, mercifully, it was answered on the second ring.

“What’s up girlfriend?” Sasha Waybright asked casually.

“S-sasha?” Marcy choked out.

“Marcy?!” Sasha’s tone changed in a heartbeat. “What’s the matter? Where are you?”

“Apartment. Anxiety attack. It’s r-really bad this time…”

“Hang on, I’m on my way!”

Sasha hung up. Marcy let the phone slip from her hand and she curled up tighter, trying to focus on her breathing.

Several minutes later, Marcy heard the front door unlock and Sasha’s voice call out: “Marcy?!”

“In here,” Marcy managed to reply.

Sasha came rushing into the bedroom. The blond woman took one look at the scene on the bed and gasped, hand going to her mouth.

“S-sorry to bother you,” Marcy said with a forced smile, craning her neck to look. “I-I didn’t have anyone else to call…”

“Marcy it’s okay,” Sasha said right away. She crossed the room and laid down on the bed, wrapping her arms around Marcy and pulling her close. One hand went to Marcy’s wet black hair, stroking gently. “It’s okay, just breathe with me. Breathe, Marcy. In and out. In…”

Marcy took a shaky breath, holding it in.

“And out.”

She forced herself to exhale slowly, the tears still falling.

“In… and out…”

---

It took several minutes, but the combination of Sasha’s comforting presence and the medication managed to calm Marcy down. After making sure Marcy was okay, Sasha laid out a t-shirt and some sweatpants for her before heading out to the kitchen to fix her something to eat. It took every ounce of Marcy’s energy to pull herself out of bed, quickly putting the shirt on first to get that scar covered. She pulled on her pants and shuffled out of the bedroom, moving at a slow and steady pace.

“Hey Mar-Mar,” Sasha said gently. She was sitting on the living room couch, two bowls of mint chocolate-chip ice cream placed on the coffee table in front of her. “Hope you don’t mind but I raided your freezer.”

“It’s fine,” Marcy said with a small smile. She grabbed one of the bowls and shoveled a huge spoonful into her mouth. The pleasant taste of mint spread across her tongue as she crunched chocolate chunks between her teeth. “Sasha I’m so sorry for dragging you over here-”

“Uh-uh-uh!” Sasha said firmly. “I don’t wanna hear any of that junk. You know I’m always here for you and Anne, no matter what.” She paused to eat some of her own ice cream. “So… it was really bad this time, huh?”

Marcy shuddered as she thought back to her panic attack in the bathroom. “Yeah. I haven’t had an attack that bad in a long time.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, do you know what triggered it?”

An image of Anne recoiling at the sight of Marcy’s scar tried to force its way into Marcy’s brain, but she derailed that train of thought.

“Well… do you know what today is?” Marcy asked.

“Your’s and Anne’s anniversary,” Sasha answered instantly. She furrowed her brow. “What, did you guys have a fight or something?” Sasha’s eyes widened. “You didn’t forget, did you?”

“No no no!” Marcy said quickly, waving her hands. “No, everything’s fine between us. And it’s been going great so far: we had a nice breakfast this morning and have a reservation at the new Italian place tonight.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

Marcy paused, a blush settling over her cheeks. “Well… Anne gets home from work in a few hours, and then we have a few hours before dinner. I wanted the two of us to have a… special time together. If you know what I mean.”

Sasha pursed her lips in thought, then her eyes widened and she smirked. “Oh I get you,” she said teasingly. “Finally gonna kick things up a notch, huh? Marcy you dog.”

Marcy gave a small smile and blushed deeper at Sasha’s playful ribbing.

“So what are you worried about? Do you need anything ‘special’ to spice things up? ‘Cause there’s a shop like three blocks from here, I can tag along if you’re nervous about going by your-”

“No, that’s not the issue,” Marcy said quickly before her face could burst into flames. She gave a heavy sigh. “I’m just worried about… this.”

She grabbed her shirt collar and pulled it down just enough to expose the top part of her scar.

Sasha furrowed her brow. “Your scar? What’s the big deal about that?” Her eyes widened and she winced. “Er not to say your scar isn't important, I mean! I know that it’s from a major time in our lives a-and I’m not trying to downplay the crazy shit you went through, I just-”

“It’s okay, I get what you mean,” Marcy said. She sighed heavily. “But that’s… kind of my problem.”

“Uh, I’m not following you.”

Marcy sighed heavily. “It’s just… when you get down to it, everything we went through in Amphibia was because of me. I was the one who found the Calamity Box. I was the one who knew exactly what it would do. I helped you pressure Anne into stealing it, all because I couldn’t face being alone.”

Marcy felt her eyes start to burn as the tears welled up again, and she quickly wiped them away. “I didn’t wanna be alone, and I ripped you guys away from your lives and families! I dropped you into a dangerous world, a place that could’ve gotten you guys killed!” The tears welled up again and Marcy’s voice hitched as she went on. “And then I lied to you both about going home! I-I just assumed you guys would want to keep going on adventures with me forever, I never even considered your feelings! I was so blinded by my desires that I didn’t even realize a power-hungry tyrant was playing me like a fiddle! And he… h-he...”

Sasha’s arms shot out, pulling Marcy into a tight hug. “It’s okay, Marcy,” she said softly. “Everything’s okay. Just breathe.”

Marcy took several deep, shuddering breaths. She could feel another attack welling up inside her, but the medication kept it in check. Sasha held her for a few more minutes until Marcy felt calm enough to continue.

“This scar is a permanent reminder of everything I put us through,” Marcy said when she pulled away. She subconsciously traced her hand across the scar over her shirt. “It’s something I’ll be living with for the rest of my life. Most of the time I can’t even look at it without triggering an attack. And I guess I’m just… afraid of Anne seeing it, okay? What if she sees it and remembers that everything she went through was my fault? What if…”

Marcy paused for a long while, looking down. When she spoke again, her voice was barely a whisper. “What if she realizes just how horrible I am?”

Sasha reached out to put a comforting hand on Marcy’s shoulder.

“Oh Mar-Mar…” she said gently, a soft smile gracing her features. “You’re such an idiot.”

Marcy looked up sharply. “Huh?”

“You really think Anne’s gonna leave you over something like that?” Sasha chuckled and shook her head. “For someone so smart, you can be pretty damn stupid sometimes. Anne is crazy about you Marcy. You should hear the way she goes on about you during our girls’ nights. There’s no way in hell she’d leave you over everything that happened all those years ago.”

“But I was the one who-”

“And that’s another thing! You’re putting way too much blame on yourself for that mess. Sure you might have found the box but I was the one who convinced Anne to swipe it. And you’re not the only one who made some big mistakes in Amphibia.” She chuckled. “I mean at least Andrias tricked you. I willingly tried to start a violent uprising to overthrow the government.”

Marcy rolled her eyes. “And look what happened when we stopped you.”

Sasha shrugged. “Yeah, but hindsight is a bitch like that.” She gently grabbed Marcy’s chin to turn her head towards Sasha, looking Marcy in the eye as she continued.

“Look, I’m not trying to downplay your mistakes. Because you made some big ones, I’m not denying that. We all made mistakes, but we all owned up to them. We learned from them so we could become better people. And you’re forgetting the important thing of all: we forgave you. Anne and I both forgave you a long, long time ago. Okay?”

Marcy felt a pang in her chest. It wasn’t the first time she’d heard those words, not by a long shot. But it didn’t lessen the impact one bit. She could feel the storm clouds of anxiety that had been roiling inside her begin to dissipate. “... Really?”

Sasha smiled sweetly. “Really.”

She yelped as Marcy shot forward to wrap Sasha in a hug, but quickly returned the embrace.

“Thank you Sasha,” Marcy said, “I really needed this, you have no idea.”

“No problem, Marcy,” Sasha said, patting her friend on the back. “You gonna be okay?”

Marcy pulled back and nodded. “Yeah. I… I think I’ll be alright.”

“Good. Now before I take off, are you sure there’s nothing you need help with before Anne comes home?”

Marcy opened her mouth but paused, the gears turning in her brain. She slowly smiled as an idea began to take shape.

“Actually… I think there is. I’m gonna need some rose petals.”

---

The apartment was dark when Anne arrived after work.

This fact didn’t surprise her too much; Marcy had a habit of gaming with the lights off, much to Anne’s charaign. But when she fished the key out of her pocket and let herself in, she was surprised to see the living room TV dark and the couch Marcy-free.

“Honey, I’m home!” Anne called out her usual greeting as she stepped across the threshold, gently shutting the door behind her.

No response.

Anne frowned as she shrugged her coat off her shoulders. Was Marcy taking a nap or something?

She was about to call out again when she saw them: rose petals on the floor. They started just beyond the front door and led down the hall towards the bedroom. The door was open just a crack, soft light coming from inside.

“Well well well, what have we here?” Anne asked herself with a chuckle as she kicked off her shoes. “Marcy Wu, you charmer.”

Anne made her way down the hall, gently opening the bedroom door.

Her heart skipped a beat.

The lights in the bedroom were all off and the curtains had been drawn; the only illumination came from the candles burning on the nightstand. The trail of rose petals continued across the carpet to the bed itself.

Marcy Wu laid back on the bed, her upper body propped up on pillows with her arms spread out casually. The blanket covered her up to her chest, clinging to the contours of her body, the creamy skin of her bare shoulders tantalizing peeking out from where the blanket ended. Marcy smiled warmly at her girlfriend, giving Anne the sultriest gaze she could muster.

“Hey Anna-Bananna,” she said in a breathy voice. “How was work?”

Fire blossomed in Anne’s face as she opened and closed her mouth, which was suddenly very dry. “Uh… guh…”

Marcy felt her confidence ebb at Anne’s stammering and she chuckled awkwardly. “Sorry, was this too much?”

“Oh no no, it’s more than fine!” Anne said quickly. “I mean I was thinking you’d have something waiting for me when I got home, but this…” Anne made a show of tugging at her shirt collar. “This is beyond anything I could’ve imagined.”

Marcy perked up, smiling shyly as she brushed some of her hair behind her ear. “So you like it then?”

Anne crossed the space between them in a fraction of a second, joining Marcy on the bed. She cupped Marcy’s chin and leaned in for a long, deep kiss. Marcy returned the kiss with gusto, reaching up with one hand to thread her fingers through Anne’s hair while the other held the blanket in place.

“I love it,” Anne said when she pulled away, fixing Marcy with a fiery gaze that had her trembling in anticipation. As much as Marcy wanted to start tearing Anne’s clothes off right then and there, she took a deep breath and held herself back.

She had to do this right.

“Anne,” Marcy said as she sat up, still holding the blanket up over her chest as she looked into her girlfriend’s eyes, “this last year has been the happiest of my entire life. When I’m with you, everything just feels right. You complete me in ways no one else ever has. You give me strength and confidence, inspire me to be a better person. I love that you’re the last thing I see before I go to sleep each night and the first thing I see when I wake up in the morning. I love you, Anne Boonchuy.”

Anne placed a hand over her mouth, eyes twinkling. “Marcy…”

Marcy took another deep breath. “I know we’ve gotten pretty… familiar with each other over these last several months. And if you’re ready to take things to the next level…”

She let the blanket fall. “Then so am I.”

Anne’s blush deepened as her eyes traveled downward. Marcy kept her face steady, but some dark corner of her brain was still expecting Anne to pull back at the sight of her scar, reminded that everything that happened in Amphibia - all of her hardships and brushes with death - was all because of Marcy.

But there was no revulsion, no anger. There was lust and desire in her gaze to be sure. But there was also passion and love. The same spark Marcy saw when she and Anne would get lost in each other’s eyes while eating dinner, or walking in the park, or just cuddling on the couch.

Anne looked back up at Marcy, then leaned in for a second kiss. Tender and gentle but with a hunger and passion bubbling just below the surface. Marcy melted into the kiss, allowing herself to be pushed back onto the pillows as Anne crawled further onto the bed, climbing on top of her girlfriend. Anne pulled away after several long seconds, both girls breathing heavily, staring at each other with smoldering eyes.

“I’ve been ready for a long, long time,” Anne said. “I love you Marcy Wu.”

Marcy felt her heart soar.

She wrapped her arms around Anne and pulled her close for yet another kiss. The third of many, many more.

#amphibia #marcanne #anne boonchuy #marcy wu #sasha waybright #fanfic

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tarisilmarwen · 3 years

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Whumptober 2021 - “Exchange“

(Predictably I had to get Ezra in trouble again, lol.

Prompts used:

No. 4 Trust Fall: "Do you trust me?"/Taken Hostage/Pushed

No. 25 Hide & Seek: Escape

No. 31 Hurt & Comfort: Prisoner

Enjoy!)

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He was never going to get used to this stench. No matter how many times Wokar Siil—their current and quite unsuspecting employer and target—had him traipse in and out of the hideout hauling crates of smuggled goods from their dead drop points, every time the doors opened Ezra would get one whiff and grimace. Once, a couple days ago, when the weather had been hot, it had been bad enough that he'd actually dry-heaved, and only a small crinkled packet of anti-nausea pills-furtively snuck to him via a hidden hand pass by Sabine-saved him the embarrassment of puking all over the short-tempered crime lord's expensive fancy Nemodian carpets.

How any of the pirates and thugs could stand it he didn't know.

Fortunately he wouldn't have to endure it much longer. Wokar was offloading his usual shipment to an enigmatic buyer the Alliance highly suspected was actually an Imperial front. Sabine would be planting trackers and transmitters all over the crates, which would transmit on a secret frequency directly to Atollon, in the hopes that the data would give Rebel Command an idea of Imperial supply lines and cargo movement.

And from there they could get to the actually fun part of infiltration jobs: blowing everything up and leaving a smoking crater behind them.

Kanan would have said that defeated the whole purpose of it being a stealth mission but it was how all their "sneak in, sneak out" missions tended to go these days and neither Ezra nor Sabine felt the need to change things up.

Sabine was passing him now, carefully leaned over her own hoverlift, heading in as he was heading out. She'd exchanged her colorful, identifiable armor for varying shades of drab brown, loose fitting and practical. The only splash of color on her was her vibrantly red-dyed hair, tucked mostly under her knit cap. Ezra thought it was a pretty good shade for her, actually, and kind of hoped she would keep it for a while after the mission.

She glanced up briefly, meeting his eyes, and he gave her a little nod to signal her. She steeled her eyes back down at her hands, gripping the handlebars to the lift slightly tighter.

Go time.

Ezra paused just before he pushed his empty hoverlift outside, angling to watch Sabine disappear into the inner storage room and breathing an unconscious sigh of relief as she slipped inside without incident.

He stepped out into the open air, inhaling deeply to get rid of the stale stench of the warehouse. The sunlight was bright, but not hot, patches of clouds drifting in every so often from the north.

He turned to the others idling at the entrance.

"That the last of it?" he asked.

A burly Trandoshan leaning against the wall and scrolling through his datapad—his name was Sskoth, Ezra had learned his second day there—grunted as he answered. "Just about," he said. "Bekar's group is coming in from the 33rd North Quadrant with the last batch." He waved his datapad, gesturing vaguely at the hoverlift. "Just go ahead and park it there."

Ezra nodded and eased the hoverlift into place against the wall in a long line-up of others. Nearby, several more of Wokar's lackeys were seated on scattered stools, laughing and passing around bottles and credits as they leaned over some kind of game on the ground at their feet.

"Hey Eemon!" the loudest of them called to Ezra, grinning broadly from ruddy cheeks, eyes already slightly bloodshot. "Come on over and sit with the big boys for a minute!"

Ezra hesitated, then cautiously walked over. Four of Wokar's longest-serving heavies crouched over the delicate glass pieces on the ground, tossing dice and moving long thin sticks around the board. Ezra frowned as he came into range.

"Little early to be gambling under the boss's nose, isn't it?" he asked dryly.

The one who'd called him over—a hefty Pantoran with jagged lightning bolts painted down his temples—rolled his shoulders and grabbed for Ezra's wrist, yanking him down heavily onto an empty stool. "Ah don't be such a stiff! Take a load off occasionally," he slurred, trapping Ezra in place with a thick arm slung around his shoulders and shoving the bottle in his hands towards Ezra's face.

His breath stank of alcohol and was hot on the side of his head. Immediately uncomfortable Ezra nevertheless reached up to take the bottle and chug back a long swig to appease the man, flatly frowning the whole time.

The drink burned instantly when it hit the back of his throat and Ezra retched before he swallowed it down. "Ugh!" he said pressing the side of his hand to his mouth as he lowered the bottle, amused laughter braying out from the circle of men around him. "Chizu, that bottle's even worse than the last one!" he complained, handing the offending container back.

The Pantoran grinned wider. "Specialty brew from back home, kid," he bragged. "Just got in today. Don't worry, not a lot of humans can handle it."

Ezra wrinkled his mouth and held back a comment about Pantoran taste buds. One of the others passed him a different bottle and Ezra was relieved to taste the milder brandy that was Sskoth's usual favorite this time.

He would have preferred to lay low under the radar and keep his head down for this mission but Chizu had made that impossible the first day. He was nosy and over-friendly—Sabine had more than once had to smack his hands away after he'd grabbed her ass—and seemed determined to include Ezra in his gossiping, smack-talk, and lewd comments. Ezra indulged the pirate just enough to keep him happy, keep him from asking too many probing questions, though he was now hideously conscious of why female grunts never really stayed long in Wokar's employ. And Chizu's companions weren't much better.

The kind of leering looks he'd seen them giving Sabine when she wasn't aware of them...

Ezra curled his shoulders, hunkering down, letting the drunken comments and laughter swirl around him. He nursed the bottle in his hands but didn't sip from it, creeping claustrophobia crawling along his spine despite the open space of the courtyard.

He felt a sudden tingling on his senses. Ezra straightened, raising his head, the Force calling out danger to him. But none of the half-drunk pirates around him seemed agitated or angry.

There was a commotion from inside the warehouse—a loud yelp and what sounded like a scuffle, shouting—and now Ezra could pinpoint the source of the warning with horrible clarity.

A wash of dread began to pool in his stomach. He looked towards the warehouse doors as more shouting emanated from it. The conversation of the others started to peter out as they also noticed the disturbance.

Ezra silently excused himself, setting down the bottle and ducking out from under Chizu's arm. He trotted quickly through the warehouse doors. Several of the heavies followed after him in curiosity.

His heart sank when he saw two henchmen wrestling Sabine through the entrance to the inner storage room and Wokar stalking angrily behind them. Sabine was putting up a hell of a fight but both pirates were twice her size, they had iron grips on her arms, one of them had his claws in her hair, yanking her head back by the pretty red locks, and from her grimacing she was in clear discomfort and pain.

Worry stole his words, so it was Sskoth who first asked the relevant questions. "What's going on, Boss?" the Trandoshan rumbled.

"What's going on," snarled Wokar, crunching his fist around a handful of small metal discs—the trackers they'd intended to plant—and shaking them furiously, "is that the little red-haired tramp you brought on to help haul cargo was putting these on the crates going to Broker 6!" He flung the trackers to the ground, and at least two of the delicate devices shattered instantly. The man's eyes flashed with anger. He glared at them as he flung out agitated arms. "Do I need to remind all of you about how delicate the arrangement with Broker 6 is?" he cried.

A round of murmured "no sir"s echoed around the room. Ezra's voice was still stuck; his mind was overactive, trying to think a way out. Sabine's cover was blown, but his was still intact, could he sneak in to wherever they would put Sabine later and get her out?

Wokar was rounding on her, getting up in her face.

"Who do you work for, Red?" the man demanded. "Is it Crimson Dawn? Boss Quay? Is he trying to muscle in on my business?"

"Kriff off you malformed slime slug!" Sabine spat back at him.

Wokar growled and roughly grabbed Sabine's face, claw-like nails digging into her chin and Ezra had to restrain himself from twitching forward and tackling the man.

"Do I need to put you in the chair? Huh?" Wokar sneered, practically breathing the words on Sabine's skin. "Let the boys have a few rounds at you?"

"Mouth like hers is only suited for the pleasure houses, if you ask me," Chizu muttered from behind Ezra, who felt his stomach drop with horror and disgust.

He'd had the misfortune of witnessing someone getting worked over in "the chair", a rickety wooden stool in the backroom where Wokar had snitches or disappointing lackeys or anyone unfortunate enough to cross him that week beaten by his cadre of strongest heavies. Ezra could still hear the crack of that poor Bothan's ribs as Chizu slammed the baton into his side, and now the thought of him doing the same to Sabine, breaking her bones with merciless glee, lecherous, hideously intimate and half-drunk...

There was no coming back for her later. He had to get Sabine out of here now.

Sabine squirmed in the hold Wokar's men had on her, trying to pry her chin free from the crime boss's grip.

"Get your hands off me you dung-breathed—"

She cut off with a hiss as the thug behind her yanked back on her hair and Wokar squeezed harder, pulling a knife from his belt that he brandished threateningly, placing it at her neck and sliding the blade along her throat.

"Last chance, sweetheart," he growled. "Who sent you?"

"No one!" Sabine strained out, and Ezra could hear the warbling note of fear in her voice. "No one sent me!"

"You know I hate liars," Wokar said through his teeth, pressing the knife in just a bit harder.

Ezra found his voice.

"Leave her alone!"

His yell cut through the warehouse, echoing slightly off the walls. Ezra was acutely aware of the stares on him as Wokar slid eyes from Sabine to look across the way.

He swallowed. "Take—take me instead," he continued. "I'm the one who asked her to put the trackers on the crates. She doesn't even know what they're for." His hands gripped softly by his sides. "Let her go and... take me in her place," he offered.

"That idiot has nothing to do with this!" Sabine yelled, her eyes flashing a warning at him, piercing him sternly. "I acted alone," she insisted.

Wokar turned his body towards Ezra, sliding the knife away from Sabine's neck and gesturing casually with it. "Red says she doesn't know you," he pointed out redundantly.

Ezra's expression firmed. "She's lying," he said. "She's trying to protect me."

Sabine wilted, looking like she wanted to scream in frustration, a shift that wasn't lost on Wokar.

"Aww how cute," he mocked. His eyes hardened. "But now I've half a mind to pop both of you," he said, and that seemed to be the cue for several of his heavies to draw their blasters and point them at Ezra.

The young Jedi kept his voice steady, pinning Wokar with a calm look. "I'm much more valuable to you than she is," he said, pressing on his mind slightly with the Force to convince him. "And I'll be worth more to you alive."

That seemed to interest Wokar. "Oh yeah?" he asked, tilting his head. "And why's that?"

"Because—"

"Ezra, don't!" Sabine hissed, interrupting him sharply.

Wokar sidled a suspicious glance back towards her, eyebrow raised at the slip. Ezra cursed silently inside his head, but met Sabine's eyes.

She was furious, angry wrinkles worrying her brows and trembling with anxious fear, spine ramrod straight, stubborn. He let his gaze bore into her, sending out a quiet command.

Trust me.

Ezra straightened up and squared his eyes on Wokar.

"Because I'm a Jedi," he revealed with confidence.

A murmur went through the gathered lowlife.

"That so?" Wokar asked, eyes alight, definitely interested now. The crime boss looked Ezra up and down in consideration, thinking for a long moment. His anger lost its edge a bit, shoulders slackening. "All right then Eemon or Ezra or whatever your name is."

He grabbed for Sabine, pulling her from his lackey's grasp and pinning her against his front, knife under her chin. She gasped as she was manhandled against his chest, squashed into place. Wokar dug the point of his blade into Sabine's tender neck, glaring across at Ezra.

"Prove it," he challenged. He jerked his head to the left. "Lift that crate, or something."

Ezra inhaled slowly through his nose, centering himself with calm.

He raised his hand and let his eyes fall closed, focusing.

After a moment or two the crate in question shuddered under the Force power tugging at it, rattling and slowly lifting off the ground. Soft exclamations made their way around the room. Ezra sunk deeper into the tranquil stillness and several more scattered crates rose up, floating above the floor. Overkill maybe, but it made his point. He held them in midair, keeping them in place to demonstrate.

They hovered almost like a warning, testifying to the kind of power he could bring against them, if he wanted to. If his goal was hurt rather than protect.

Wokar whistled with a low tone, impressed. "All right," he determined. "I'm convinced."

Ezra let all the crates drop with a heavy thump! He fixed a hard glare on the crime boss. "Let her go and..." He paused to steel his breath. "I won't resist. I won't even try to escape," he promised. "You can hand me over to the Empire or..." He swallowed down a bit of dry fear. "...or whatever you want. Just let her go free."

The man considered that for a moment, before his mouth widened with a sleezy grin. "Deal," he said.

He released Sabine, pushing her forward roughly.

Sabine stumbled a few paces into Ezra's arms, his hands gripping her elbows and hers closing around his forearms, his blue eyes soft with concern.

"You okay?" he whispered.

She raised her face and glared at him. "You better not do anything stupid to get yourself killed before I can come back for you," she told him, quietly admonishing.

He let himself grin, relieved that she was okay enough to scold him. "I won't, promise," he told her.

They didn't have time for more goodbyes. Chizu and Sskoth were coming forward to collect him, pulling his hands behind his back and clamping binders around his wrists. He was nudged forward as Sabine was yanked back, dragged by her elbow out towards the door.

The last glimpse she caught of him before she was tossed out on her ear with a derisive "Get outta here, girlie." was him surrounded by pirates and thugs, being bustled into the inner storage room under Wokar's watchful eye.

Sabine pulled herself from the pavement with a groan.

This was gonna be fun to explain to Kanan.

***

Sabine bit her lip as she waited for a response to come in.

"Spectre 5 to Ghost, come in," she said again, pacing the short length of the side street.

"Read you loud and clear, Spectre 5," came the response, Kanan's voice piping on Sabine's comlink. "Finished the mission?" he asked.

"Yeeeeeeeaah, about that," Sabine began, once again cursing Ezra and his stupid, self-sacrificial instincts. "There's been a slight change of plans. I need you to track frequency zero-seven-seven."

Sabine could hear the gears working in Kanan's head.

"Isn't... That's the ping code for Ezra's wrist comm," he said.

Chopper warbled in the background, confirming it.

Sabine grimaced, already mentally flinching. "Yes it is," she sighed. "Wherever Wokar's crates are, that's where Ezra is right now," she explained.

Kanan groaned over the line.

"You were supposed to be tagging the cargo, not escorting it!" he complained.

"Well, now Ezra is the cargo!" Sabine snapped, throwing a hand out. "My cover got blown and Ezra—like an idiot—blew his own and offered himself up to save me!"

"Like a Jedi," Kanan corrected.

"Same difference!" Sabine bit, exasperated.

A long sigh came over the line. "All right," Kanan said. "I've got the trace. Chopper says he's probably on a transport, moving fast towards Docking Bay thirty-seven."

Sabine brought up a holo-map of the port and nodded. "I can intercept him at the loading dock." She studied the map a few more moments, biting her lip, a horrible scratching guilt just underneath her sternum. "Just hope Wokar doesn't decide to make a last-minute buyer change," she worried aloud.

"Do you need any help?" Kanan offered, concern warming his words.

"No, I got him." She straightened from her hunch, switching off the holomap. "Dumbass, nerf-headed..." she muttered. "He gets it from you, you know," she told Kanan.

"Thanks," he said, as though it were something to be proud of. More seriously, he added, "Keep your comm on. If you run into complications, you call us immediately."

"Got it. Spectre 5 out."

Sabine clicked off the comlink and blew out an aggrieved sigh.

She tightened the straps to her belt holster and got moving.

***

Hera raised an eyebrow as Kanan walked in, comlink in hand and looking very tired. He felt out for the copilot chair before sagging into it bonelessly.

"I take it the mission hit a snag?" she guessed.

"Ezra got captured," he explained wearily. "Sabine says she got caught and he stepped in and gave himself up to protect her." He closed his eyes, going tranquil for a moment. "He's not hurt," he reported.

"But we're still worried," Hera deciphered, leaning onto her knees, probing his face.

A tired smile twirked at his lips. "Always."

Hera reached across and clasped his hand. He squeezed it back, opening his eyes back up.

"He'll be okay," he told her. "Sabine's already gone to get him back."

Hera chuckled. "Well now I just feel sorry for those pirates," she quipped.

"Yeah..." Kanan agreed, sharing the humor. Worry stealing over his face, though, his smile faded and he leaned forward. "Weeeeee should probably make sure she doesn't blow up the whole port."

Hera grimaced and pulled her hand from his in order to begin the startup sequence.

***

The rumbling outside the pitch-black chamber had stopped, and now the transport's engines just seemed to be idling. Low vibrations rattled through his seat. He could hear vague, muffled voices outside the doors.

He shifted uncomfortably, a low clink of metal sounding as he tried to ease the strain on his arms. The darkness was oppressively quiet, and even that small sound felt horribly noisy.

Ezra gave out a small puff of breath through his nose. He wondered idly what was supposed to happen now. The transport didn't seem in a hurry to leave and he'd heard no ships approaching from outside. He was kind of bored, actually. If he could get into a better position he might almost have no complaints.

The tether attached to his wrist cuffs made that impossible, though.

He leaned into the Force, feeling its calm wrap around him, warming away the anxious prickles he could feel on the corners of his mind.

The voices outside suddenly sharpened in alarm.

Ezra raised his head a bit, curiously listening.

Were those... blaster shots?

***

She had considered trying to draw Wokar and his goons away from the transport before breaking into it, but the snatches of conversation she caught as she crouched behind the wall put that quickly out of mind and gave her a sour feeling in her mouth.

"But why couldn't you at least let me have a go at her, eh? Little tart was asking for it," Chizu was complaining.

Wokar shoved the other man out of his personal bubble with a practiced aggravation. "The kid made a deal you skuzzy hornbag. And I honor my agreements." There was a greedy gleam in the man's eyes as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Wonder how much extra they'll pay for a Jedi?"

"Not enough to compensate me for losing out on that cute redhead," Chizu grumbled, crossing his arms childishly.

Sabine ground her teeth and primed her blasters.

Oh no. Definitely shooting them now, she decided.

She straightened, rolling a smoke grenade along the stone floor towards them.

It popped open with a bang, startling several of Wokar's lackeys. Sabine darted out into the smoke, using the gray haze as cover to quickly take down the other two heavies before turning attention to her two biggest grievances.

The crime boss's eyes widened with shock, to Sabine's satisfaction.

"Wha—Red?" he exclaimed.

She shot him point blank with one of her WESTARs, following up with a kick to the stomach.

"That's for Ezra," she said.

Rounding on Chizu she brought her leg up between the man's thighs, making him shriek and curl inwards, only to get a solid roundhouse to the chin as Sabine slung her fist into his face.

The Pantoran wobbled shakily, off-balance, and Sabine finished him off with an uppercut to the collar.

"And that's for grabbing my ass!" she yelled.

The man crumpled, senseless, to the duracrete floor.

Sabine stood over the lifeless forms of the thugs for a moment, seething. Taking a deep breath, she calmed herself, and walked over to the transport, reaching to press the button to release the rear hatch.

It hissed open to reveal a dozen neatly stacked crates and, off to the side, sitting on the protruding shelf with his wrists and ankles locked in heavy metal cuffs, Ezra, who alerted to her with a muffled sound of delight, because his lower face was covered, a metal device was latched around his head.

Sabine fumed with white-hot fury—they had muzzled him like an animal—as she climbed up into the transport.

"Well I see you completely ignored my warning not to get into trouble," she drawled sarcastically as she reached first for the metal plate.

It popped open with a hiss as she found the release mechanism, and Ezra gave a low sigh of relief as it came off his mouth.

And then he had the audacity to grin at her.

"Trouble just follows me, Sabine. I didn't do anything," he defended.

Her eyes narrowed with flat skepticism. "Really?" she asked. "You didn't do anything? Heavy restraints, a shock collar, and a freaking muzzle?" she listed, holding up the device pointedly.

There was a beat of silence as she stared him down.

"...I may have bit someone," he admitted sheepishly.

Sabine groaned loudly, rolling her entire head before she reached in and fiddled with the lock to his collar.

"What part of 'Don't do anything stupid.' didn't you understand?" she complained. "Bad enough that you blew the entire mission just because I ran into a little trouble planting the trackers." With a little fiddling the collar popped open, and Sabine was relieved to see that Ezra's neck showed no sign that they'd had to use it. She moved on to the wrist cuffs, thick blocky metal bands with a very short chain, anchored with a tether to the transport wall. "Ugh, why do you always have to be such a martyr?" she grumbled.

He fixed her with an intense, serious look. "I wasn't going to let them hurt you, Sabine," he told her, tone deadly frank. "Not if I could help it. Not if there was something I could do."

Sabine felt her cheeks fill with uncomfortable heat. Her movements behind Ezra's back became faltering, clumsy. "You didn't have to," she said, a slight shake in her voice now.

"Yeah. I did," he insisted. "You couldn't sense what they wanted to do you, Sabine. I could. I wasn't going to let anyone else go through that if I could stop it." His declaration was soft, sincere, and it made something in her chest clench.

She averted her eyes, flushing with shame and guilt. Silently, she worked at Ezra's cuffs until they sprang open. He brought his hands around in front to massage feeling back into them, and Sabine knelt by his legs to get his ankle cuffs.

Why couldn't he see that he was so much more important to the Rebellion than her? So what if she could have been hurt? She was the idiot who hadn't checked to make sure she wouldn't be spotted. If those thugs had taken him to the backroom instead of her or... or if she hadn't found him time... she would have never forgiven herself.

"It was my fault," she mumbled into his knee. "My mistake. I'm the one that should have paid for it," she said. "Not you."

She couldn't see it from her position, but it felt like Ezra smiled. "Kanan says that Jedi are supposed to be like shields," he told her. "Taking damage for those who can't. Protecting them from greater harm. That's all I was trying to do." His grin widened. "Besides," he said, "I knew you would be back to save me."

Sabine gave a huff that lifted one red bang.

"You're going to get yourself killed," she told him, though there was no bite in her voice, just tired acceptance.

The ankles cuffs fell loose around Ezra's feet.

"Maybe, but not today," he said, putting his hands on the shelf to brace as he stood up. "Oh, while I was... not trying to escape, because that would have been stupid," he said, "I managed to recover a couple trackers. They're on the crates now." He grinned again. "So really, you didn't have to worry at all."

Sabine shook her head, wonderingly. Only Ezra could treat getting captured by smugglers like no big deal. I can't with this boy. "You're unbelievable." She grabbed his wrist, firmly pulling him to his feet. "Well, come on," she urged. "Let's get your self-sacrificing Jedi ass back home."

He gratefully accepted her hand, following along as she led him out of the transport. The smoke from her grenade was clearing and the Ghost was already headed in, moving to hover over the docking bay airspace.

Sabine glanced out of the corner of her eye at Ezra, who seemed completely serene and unrattled by his brief captivity. She ducked her head again, the heat in her cheeks seeming to rise up towards her eyes, and she blinked furiously.

That instinct inside him, that Jedi urge to protect and shield... she didn't think she'd ever understand it.

...But she was grateful for it, she could admit, as she took Ezra by the hand and readied her jetpack for ignition.

In moments, she was bringing him into the cargo hold, undamaged... and safe.

#star wars #star wars rebels #sabezra #ezra bridger #whumptober2021 #fanfiction #prompt fics #whump

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theowlsarequeer · 3 years

Note

hey, in your post about the trans rep on broadway panel, you mentioned the JLP thing. i haven't heard about it, so if you don't mind, could you explain what's going on please? (totally fine if you don't want to)

No worries, I can explain!

So JLP is Jagged Little Pill, which is a musical that recently transferred to Broadway and is nominated for a lot of Tony awards for the 2020 season. They cover a lot of topics like addiction, inter-racial adoption, and LGBTQ+ stuff. And in the original off-Broadway version, one of their characters, Jo, was nonbinary. They used they/them pronouns, and there was a scene where their girlfriend, Frankie, misgendered them and apologized. We don’t have any official footage, but you can clearly hear this in bootlegs, and Jo’s (cis woman) actor, Lauren Patten, used they/them pronouns for them before the show transferred. And the fact that Jo was nonbinary was confirmed several times.

And then when the show first opened in previews on Broadway, the script was apparently changed, because all scenes where Jo’s gender was mentioned were either cut or altered, and in this version of the show Jo uses she/her pronouns. Jo isn’t nonbinary anymore. They’re still played by Lauren Patten, although Lauren’s understudy (or standby, I’m not totally sure which,) is nonbinary. Their name is Ezra Menas, btw, and zie uses they/zie/hir pronouns.

Now this is pretty disappointing since there’s little to none trans/nonbinary rep on Broadway, but not the end of the world. However, the people involved with Jagged Little Pill refused to acknowledge that Jo was ever nonbinary. I heard in the panel today that Lauren Patten had said that the character wasn’t written as nonbinary a while back. And then Jagged Little Pill published the following thread.

There was also a video, which I haven’t had the time to watch yet, but from what I’ve heard it says basically just that. That Jo was never written as trans or nonbinary. However, we know they were. There were people at the panel today who had seen the off-Broadway show in Boston, and they confirmed what I’d heard. That Jo used they/them pronouns, and identified themself as nonbinary.

And the trans theatre community, myself included, have been very upset over this. We don’t have a lot of representation, and now we were all excited about Jagged having an enby character when all of a sudden they don’t. And that’s why there was a panel today about trans rep on Broadway.

Apparently there was a panel by the JLP team, where they talked a lot about how many Tonys they were nominated for, which is another issue. Lauren Patten, the actor who plays Jo, was nominated for Best Featured Actress in a musical. This would not have been possible had Jo been played by a nonbinary actor. To me, it feels like they chose a potential Tony award over trans representation, and that hurts.

Not to mention that since JLP covers so many issues, it feels like they cut the one they thought people would miss the least: the nonbinary character. And that also hurts.

They also tweeted this right around the time a lot of anti-trans bills were being passed, and while that’s definitely not their fault, and their timing probably wasn’t intentional, it definitely doesn’t feel right.

So basically the trans community, specifically the trans theatre community, is saying “no.” Because we can’t be left out of the conversation about gender anymore. And this is not ok. And trans inclusion was included in the list of demands for the March on Broadway, which I think is pretty cool.

On the bright side, it’s been cool for me, a young trans person, to see that so many people in the industry I want to go into aren’t just going to let this slide.

Anyway, I’m so sorry for the essay lol, I’m just pretty annoyed about this. And I’m pretty stressed and tired, so sorry if this doesn’t make a lot of sense. Thank you so much for asking, by the way, I appreciate it.

#jagged little pill #trans #transgender #broadway #trans rep #musicals #theatre

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shan2-d2 · 4 years

Text

As the garbage fire year of 2020 continues, I have been struggling to find something to fill the Schitt’s-Creek-sized hole in my heart.

Which, come to think of it, replaced the Parks-and-Rec-sized hole in my heart prior to that. I’ve always been a sucker for “soft” television, but with everything going on the world, whatever tolerance I had for heavier fare has disappeared completely. Like, yeah, I’d love to catch I May Destroy You or I’ll Be Gone in the Dark, but I just. Can’t. Handle. Them. Right now, anyway.

I do have some old standards to fall back on-- Bob’s Burgers, The Good Place, The Great British Baking Show, and Kim’s Convenience (bless you, Canada) work just fine. But with so much time at home, I’ve been getting antsy for new, soft, comforting content.

Then I watched Julie and the Phantoms on Netflix.

And I loved it SO. MUCH.

(Warning, since this is a family-friendly show: profanity ahead.)

Which, I have to admit, I’m kind of embarrassed about. Like, look: I fully own up to the fact that my tastes aren’t exactly refined or mature. I’m one of those contemptible “childless millennials”, after all. There are things on my Netflix and Spotify lists that would make film buffs and hipsters cry.

But what I will give myself a pat on the back for is that I’m extremely open-minded when it comes to any sort of art consumption. My tastes are super-varied, and I don’t have the burden of worrying about what is “socially acceptable” for me to watch. I can watch Barry and Fleabag just as happily as I can watch Sarah & Duck (literally, a show for preschoolers that works better than any anti-anxiety medication I’ve tried) and old episodes of Tiny Toon Adventures.

Regardless, there’s embarrassment. Which is not about the fact that it’s a cheesy, High-School-Musical-esque, pre-teen friendly series, actually (... okay, maybe a little), but because the aging freakout is real, my friends. Hitting the “Oh-My-God, I’d-Have-To-Play-the-PARENT” period of your life is fucking rough.

Basically, in the words of Roger Murtaugh... I’m too old for this shit.

But I’m trying to tell myself that 1) Generation Z is delightful and I refuse to feel guilt for appreciating them, 2) god knows we’re all watching Stranger Things without embarrassment, and those kids are, like, twelve, and 3) now that I’m apparently ANCIENT, I’m supposed to stop caring about what other people think.

So: Julie and the Phantoms made my heart grow three sizes and I loved it a whole lot.

Quick synopsis: Julie, our hero, is a performing arts school student who is grieving the death of her mom and unable to continue making/playing music because of it. One day, three ghosts of teenage boys who were in a mid-90’s rock band show up in her garage. They form a new band (insert title of show here) and help Julie rediscover her love of music, while she helps them navigate the afterlife. Bonding occurs, lessons are learned, the power of friendship is discovered, you get the idea.

And okay-- at its surface, it’s family-friendly entertainment, you know? Cute story, funny moments, the music is catchy, the whole cast is super talented (and, hey, can actually play their instruments! Whaddaya know!).

But the CHARACTERS! THE SOFTNESS! THE REPRESENTATION! If this is how young adults are going to written from now on, sign me the fuck up.

First of all, the two female leads of the show are women of color-- Julie (Madison Reyes) is Latinx and her best friend, Flynn (Jadah Marie), is Black. That alone is (sadly, STILL) noteworthy, but I literally wanted to stand on my couch and yell about how wonderfully self-assured, smart, mature, strong, and competent these girls are. Julie, in particular, is just… she’s just so cool, you guys. She never once has to rely on anyone else but herself to get shit done, and she takes responsibility for her own actions. The girl very clearly knows her talent, capabilities, and worth, and PHEW, do we need to see more young women like her on our screens! Like, yes, the boys support her, but they’re complete equals. Julie doesn’t need any male saviors up in this business. She’s got this. I LOVE HER. I SOMEHOW WANT TO BE HER WHEN I GROW UP, EVEN THOUGH SHE’S LIKE HALF MY AGE (oh GOD. I’m so OLD).

In fact, throughout the series, the importance of honesty, respect, and healthy support is repeatedly emphasized. There’s no dependency issues here, and lying of any kind is clearly forbidden. Which I loved, because the whole “teen lying to everyone” storyline has been done to death.

Then there’s the three boys of Sunset Curve-- Luke (Charlie Gillespie), Alex (Owen Joyner), and Reggie (Jeremy Shada), i.e. the messengers of destruction for toxic masculinity. THIS IS THE MALE FRIENDSHIP PORTRAYAL WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR, PEOPLE. They’re so nice to each other! They’re so supportive! They’re tactile, openly emotional, and completely devoid of judgment of any interests or behaviors that don’t follow male social standards. Bless the Age of the Soft Boys, may their reign be unbreakable and everlasting.

Oh, and Alex is openly gay. It’s not just hinted at-- he’s out and proud, with an adorable crush/pre-relationship with a skater boy named Willie (Booboo Stewart). And, apart from a quick mention about Alex’s parents being homophobic, the show pretty much takes the Schitt’s Creek route-- all love and acceptance, with not much of a thing made of his sexuality at all (in fact, there’s enough evidence that none of the boys are completely straight, and I’m here for that, too).

And if all of that isn’t enough of a cuddle to the heart for you, THERE’S MORE:

Julie’s supportive, soft dad

Reggie’s immediate, one-sided bond with Julie’s supportive, soft dad and her brother

Julie and Luke totally have crushes on each other and it’s SO SWEET but completely age-appropriate, good job guys

I’m a sucker for good harmonies and the band HAS ‘EM IN SPADES

Flynn being HBIC the entire series

Julie’s crush Nick being very realistically awkward and dopey in the shadow of Luke’s arms (Nick, dude, lose that HAT, I beg of you)

A surprisingly moving side-plot/song about Luke’s parents

Alex just wanting to dance, and also being a high-key feminist and calling out the others when they slip up

EVERYONE’S JUST SO FUCKING NICE, OKAY

So yeah. Shut up. It’s wonderful and pure, and I WILL TAKE ANY SOFTNESS I CAN GET IN THIS HELL YEAR, WHEREVER I CAN GET IT.

In conclusion, Kenny Ortega can have my entire soul if he wants it, for not only this but also Hocus Pocus and Newsies.

Completely Unnecessary Afterword:

Being old enough to remember 1995-- and, specifically, what was popular that year-- has brought up some important questions regarding the Sunset Curve boys:

We know they died in ‘95, but like… when? Did they get to see Empire Records, for Christ’s sake?! Did they see Casper, because, I mean, they’re basically the Devon Sawas of 2020? Were they spared their contemporaries’ fate of constantly over-quoting Billy Madison and Tommy Boy?

OH MY GOD, DID THEY HAVE AOL SCREEN NAMES, AND WHAT WERE THEY??

What are each of the guys’ favorite song off of Boyz II Men’s “II”? This is possibly the MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION.

Did they die before Jagged Little Pill came out? That would kind of break my heart. Not that I expect Julie to start portraying Alanis-levels of anger/angst, but ‘95 was a YEAR for women in rock. Garbage, Hole, No Doubt, PJ Harvey, The Cranberries, Veruca Salt, Bjork, and countless others-- they all had massive hits that year. I love the idea of Julie and the guys sitting around the garage listening to all of those women for inspiration. Can we have a resurgence of female-led rock bands taking over the charts, please?

On a much more serious note, given where the AIDS crisis was in ‘95, it’s no wonder Alex is a nervous wreck. It’s not really something I expect the show to delve into, but man… getting transported to 2020 might’ve been a bit of a blessing (not that things are great now, but y’know, medical progress).

How in the world did none of them fall victim to the whole “white boys dressing hip-hop” trend back in ‘95? I mean… Clueless got it right. (Wait, did they make it to Clueless??)

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#julie and the phantoms #jatp #blog #netflix #I am old

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derekklenadaily · 3 years

Text

Jagged Live In NYC: A Broadway Reunion Concert - a global livestream of the one-night-only onstage reunion of the Broadway cast - will have a special Encore Airing on Saturday, March 6 at 7:00PM ET.

This encore event will benefit the charitable organizations RAINN, Learn to Cope, GLAAD and Color of Change. Available exclusively on the premium streaming platform Stellar (www.stellartickets.com), worldwide audiences will now have one more chance to experience a night of searing performances from Tony Award nominees Elizabeth Stanley, Celia Rose Gooding, Sean Allan Krill, Derek Klena, Lauren Patten, Kathryn Gallagher, Antonio Cipriano, and more, alongside the Jagged Little Broadway Band. The concert will also be followed by a special live Q&A session with members of the musical's cast.

Tickets to the encore stream of the event are free, with a suggested donation that will directly support the vital work of these charitable organizations: RAINN, the nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization. (rainn.org); Learn to Cope, a non-profit support network offering education and resources for parents and family members coping with a loved one addicted to opiates or other drugs (learn2cope.org); GLAAD, a dynamic media force that tackles tough issues to shape the narrative, provoke dialogue and rewrite the script for LGBTQ acceptance (glaad.org); and Color of Change, the nation's largest online racial justice organization, helping people respond effectively to injustice in the world (colorofchange.org).

On December 13, 2020, the 15-time Tony-nominated Broadway cast of Jagged Little Pill safely reunited on stage at Shubert Studios in New York City, for the first time since the global health crisis caused a suspension of live theater performances in March. Directed by Tony Award winner Diane Paulus, Jagged Live In NYC: A Broadway Reunion Concert delivered an electrifying dose of much-needed collective joy through the Grammy-winning songbook of Alanis Morissette - streaming directly into thousands of living rooms across the world, and becoming one of Stellar's most successful programs to date. In the spirit of the #SaveOurStages movement, the December presentation of the concert event directly supported the nation's vulnerable venues experiencing catastrophic revenue loss during this time of suspension for live arts. Partner performing arts centers and regional theaters across the nation sold concert tickets to their subscribers and single ticket buyers ahead of the general public on-sale, and kept a portion of proceeds from those sales to support their future programming.

Nominated for 15 Tony Awards including Best Musical, Jagged Little Pill is inspired by seven-time Grammy Award winner Alanis Morissette's seminal album of the same name, which recently celebrated its 25th Anniversary. Directed by Tony Award winner Diane Paulus (Waitress, Pippin), Jagged Little Pill features an original story by Academy Award-winning writer Diablo Codya??(Juno, Tully) that takes a fearless look at what it means to be alive in 21st century America.

Starring in Jagged Little Pill as The Healys - a seemingly perfect family, who strives to hide the cracks beneath the surface when a troubling event shakes their community - are Tony nominees Elizabeth Stanley as "Mary Jane," Sean Allan Krill as "Steve", Celia Rose Gooding as "Frankie" and Derek Klena as "Nick"; alongside Tony nominee & Outer Critics Circle Award winner Kathryn Gallagher as "Bella," Tony nominee & Drama Desk Award winner Lauren Patten as "Jo," and Antonio Cipriano as "Phoenix," all of whom reprise their roles on Broadway from the musical's record-breaking, sold-out world premiere at American Repertory Theater. Variety hails the cast as "Triumphant! Not Since Rent has a musical invested so many bravura roles with so much individual life."

Tickets are free, with a suggested donation to partner charities, and are available now at www.stellartickets.com. Ticketholders will be able to stream the show on any computer browser (laptop or desktop), mobile web, the Stellar Android or iOS app, or on TV via the Stellar app on Apple TV, Fire TV, and Roku.

[SOURCE]

#derek klena #broadway #sean allan krill #elizabeth stanley #celia rose gooding #kathryn gallagher #antonio cipriano #lauren patten #ezra menas #deanne stewart #annelise baker #laurel harris #event: jlp virtual reunion concert #jlp reunion virtual concert #officialbroadwayworld #news

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blursed-ninjago-ideas · 4 years

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Is this what you want? insp

Zane stared at Kai’s unconscious body. He hadn’t meant to. It was a tense situation; he was just scared and…well.

“You did the right thing.”

Zane scowled at the unwanted voice in his head. He hit his head the day before and there he was. Zane had been doing his best to ignore him. He’d taken to calling him Overkill, because that was what his suggestions were.

Kai was still on the ground.

This had all started because Kai had gotten hurt and his ankle was still recovering. Today he wanted to train again, but Nya had told him he couldn’t. They fought and Kai ran off.

Zane should’ve just let him go, but Overkill had insisted he check on him. Sure enough, he’d found Kai trying to make a brace for his ankle out of some bandages so he could go out and fight. Zane had tried to talk him out of it, but Kai had gotten so mad and defensive. Overkill’s screaming was not helping Zane think straight, so he had lost it and struck Kai on the back of the head as he tried to walk away.

“You did what he had to do to protect him.” Overkill assured him.

“No, I attacked him.”

“You protected him.”

Zane sighed. Nya had stormed off on her own after the fight, and his other brothers were all visiting their respective families. He was all on his own.

“I hit him!”

“What’s one little bump compared to the slashes and bruises he would’ve come home with? The bullet wound he would hide and try to treat himself? The infection he would get from not addressing it correctly? The fever he would suffer from while his body fought off the infection? The worry Nya and Lloyd would feel seeing their older brother sick and bedridden? The guilt he’d feel for making them worry? The shame he’d feel every time he looked at the jagged scar?”

Zane tighten his clenched fists.

“You don’t know that would happen.”

“You know his ankle isn’t recovered enough for him to fight. You know he would get in over his head! You know he would get himself hurt!”

“What’s the point then!? He’ll just be more determined to go out when he wakes up.” Zane spat.

“Then stop him.”

“What would you have me do? Lock him up!? How would that be helping him!?” Zane yelled, exasperated.

“Of course not! That would only add to his suffering.”

Zane huffed.

“Then what?” he snapped.

Silence.

“That’s what I thought! I’m going to start to work on an apology for when he wakes up.” Zane said, still annoyed.

“You have to protect him.”

Zane sighed.

“That’s your job. You have to protect people, right?”

“Yes.” Zane muttered, still annoyed and losing his stamina for the argument.

“Well he needs protected from himself. That’s what we’re doing.”

Zane just stayed quiet, putting Kai on the cot so he wouldn’t wake up on the floor.

“He’s only trying to put himself in danger because he’s upset. We can’t just stop at physically protecting him, we have to treat the deeper issue! His emotional pain leads to him being in danger.”

“Meaning?” Zane asked, his tone still short.

“Meaning we have to protect him from himself not just physically, we have to protect him mentally too.”

Zane let out a bitter laugh

“We’ve all been trying to help Kai through his issues for years now. I can’t just go into his brain and fix things!”

“But you can!”

“How in the world could I do that?” Zane asked.

“The overlord did it.”

Zane stopped suddenly in shock.

“He did it to Borg, and even Wu.”

Zane shock.

“Are you asking me to mind control my friend?”

“I’m not asking you to do anything! I’m pointing out a problem and telling you the solution.”

“What the Overlord did was evil.”

“What he did was use a weapon. He hurt people with it yes, but you use weapons to protect all the time, don’t you? Villains have always used weapons. That doesn’t make the weapon evil. All you would be doing is using a weapon to protect someone.”

That….was decent logic, Zane had to admit that.

“You have total access to Borg’s systems, including the canceled projects the Overlord developed. You could look into it.”

“But I’d never-“

“Nya won’t be back for hours. The others are all away visiting family. You have all the time you need.”

“But I couldn’t-“

“Kai is suffering. You can protect him from that suffering. What kind of protector would you be if you let him continue like this? If he was happy, if he was pain-free, he wouldn’t feel the need to hurt himself and others to mange it. We can give that to him. We can fix it, fix him.”

With Overkill whispering in his ear, Zane stared working. It wasn’t long until the chip was done. Implanting it wasn’t hard either.

Zane drowned in guilt the moment he activated it, but Kai was waking up and needed his attention.

Kai’s eyes fluttered open and he moaned as he sat up, rubbing his neck where Zane he implanted the chip.

“What happened?”

Zane was speechless. Kai didn’t seem too much like the zombie he feared he’d turn his friend into.

“Zane?” Kai asked, wide open eyes staring back.

“You…you were trying to go out and fight and I stopped you.” Zane explained.

Would Kai remember that Zane had attacked him? Zane cringed and braced himself for Kai’s anger.

“Oh.” Was all he said.

Zane blinked and stared at Kai.

“That was probably for the best. My ankle isn’t fully healed, I would’ve gotten hurt.” Kai said, smiling. “Thanks.”

“You’re not mad?” Zane asked in disbelief.

Kai shook his head and gave another big smile.

“Nah. You were right. I was just being stupid. How about we stay in and watch a movie or something?”

“You see how happy he is now that we’ve protected him from his own bad thoughts?” Overkill said.

“How’s your ankle?” Zane asked, ignoring certain things for the moment.

Kai shrugged.

“It’s throbbing a little, but it’s manageable.”

“I should give you an anti-inflammatory.”

“Alright.” Kai agreed.

“He’s even stopped refusing medical treatment. He’s so much better now that we fixed him. He needed this!”

Zane couldn’t argue with results. Kai was so much happier. He took the pill Zane gave him and even let him elevate his foot while they watched the movie.

“This is the best way to protect him.” Overkill told him, and Zane was starting to agree with him.

Halfway through their second movie, Nya got home.

“Alright, how much damage did you do?” she asked reluctantly as she come into the room, not surprised to see Kai’s ankle elevated, but a little surprised to see it not back in a splint.

“Actually, I didn’t go out.” Kai said.

Nya glared.

“Honest! Ask Zane! I’ve been here all night!”

Nay looked to Zane who nodded. She knew he wouldn’t lie to her face like that, so that meant Kai was telling the truth.

“Alright, who are you and what have you done with my brother?” Nya asked.

Zane stiffed, thinking he was caught for a moment.

“You caught me. I’m Kai’s responsible clone. You’ve thwarted my plans to take over his life and improve it while he was locked in the closet. Curse you.” Kai said playfully, while rolling his eyes.

Nya laughed. Zane relaxed. They all settled in to continue their movie marathon, now with Nya.

Kai feel asleep somewhere towards the ending of movie number four. Nya took the chance to ask Zane more about Kai’s sudden self-preservation.

“I just…. I dealt with the real problem instead of the symptoms of it.” Zane explained.

“Do I even want to know how you managed that?” Nya asked, half joking.

Zane laughed it off but didn’t answer.

He didn’t want to lie, but he also was pretty sure Nya would have a problem if she knew what he did to her brother.

But it was fine. It was to protect him.

“Well thanks. Whatever you did got through that thick skull of his. I’m glad he’s ok. Maybe he might not get himself half killed for a while!”

Zane was even more firm in his decision. He did the right thing. He helped Kai.

So, when Overkill spoke up again a few days later, Zane listened.

“Lloyd is in pain too.”

“He is?”

“Look at how much he’s suffered. The nightmares, the grief, the scars, he deserves better.”

“He does.” Zane agreed.

“We could protect him from those nightmares. We could protect him from all his guilt and sadness.”

Overkill was right. Zane was made to protect, and this was the best and most effective way to do it. Zane didn’t dither before getting to work like had with Kai, he got straight to it.

“Why should we stop there? All our friends should be protected. They have flawed human brains that hurt for no reason and make the wrong choices for themselves. We can fix that. We can give them better. Protect them from their own minds!”

Zane couldn’t agree more.

Jay was the next one he could get alone, with Kai and Lloyd’s help of course. They were more than happy to help, and things went so much smoother with assistance too. Now he just had to wait for Jay to bring Nya to him.

Jay had never in his life been so thankful. Thankful he was the master of the element he was. Thankful for static shock. Thankful for doorknobs.

“You alright?” Nya asked.

Oh no.

“No. No I’m not. We have to go.”

“But you said-“

Jay grabbed her wrist and started to drag her away.

“Jay! What are you doing!?”

“Just trust me, we can’t go in there. We have to find Cole.”

Nya huffed, but let Jay lead her below deck to where Cole was lifting weights. Said ninja gave them a surprised look when Jay came bursting in with Nya in tow and slammed the door close behind them.

“What’s up?” Cole asked, while Jay frantically tried to barricade the door.

“What’s up, is Zane’s gone crazy!” Jay yelled.

Nya gave him a flat look while Cole just blinked in disbelief.

“I’m serious. He….” Jay choked on the words “He……he put something in my….” Deep breaths “in my head. I’m pretty sure he did it to Lloyd and Kai too. I was…”

As crazy as he was sounding, Jay’s distress was real. Cole put a comforting hand on his back while Jay force himself to keep talking.

“I was….I was getting Nya so he could….do it to her.” He screwed his eyes shut, trying to power through “But I think the static on the doorknob reacted with my element. I must’ve shorted out whatever he was using to….control me.”

“Jay….are you sure-“

“YES, I’M SURE!!!” Jay snapped.

“But why would Zane do that?” Nya asked

“I don’t know, but he….he was definitely in my head….” Jay was ready to cry from the stress and trauma.

Zane was his friend, and normally Jay would trust him with his life. But this…it was violating, and Jay didn’t know how he could forgive Zane for it.

A knock at the door.

“Jay, Are you in here? You ran off in such a panic, I wanted to make sure you were alright.” Zane said through the door.

Jay trembled but answered.

“Yeah….I’m fine. Just going to chill in here for a while.”

The door rattled.

“Why is the door locked, Friend?”

“It’s just….for privacy.” Jay excused, sending frightened glances over at Nya and Cole.

“Would you please open it?” Zane asked in a level tone.

“N-no. Not right now.”

Quiet.

“It’s not safe to keep the door locked like this.” Zane said, disapproval in his voice.

“It’s fine.”

“No. It’s not Jay. Let me in so I can protect you.”

Nya and Cole finally looked a little concerned.

“I’m ok Za-“

Zane started to try to break the door down.

“Zane stop.” Nya pleaded.

“It’s ok Nya, I’m just trying to keep you all safe.”

“How are you planning on doing that Zane?” Cole asked hesitantly.

“Oh.” Zane said quietly, the pounding stopping for a moment.

“You’re all three in there.” Zane stated in a dismayed voice. “I would’ve much preferred to do this more gently, but if I have to use force I will.”

“Zane….what did you do? What did you do to my brother? Did you…. are you controlling him?” Nya had tears in her eyes.

“I’m protecting him from his own thoughts. He’s happier and less likely to put himself in danger now.” Zane explained cheerfully in an unhinged tone

Nya took a step away from the door and joined in Jay’s frightened shaking.

“Zane buddy. Let’s talk this out, ok? You don’t have to do this.” Cole shakily tried to reason.

“I do have to do this. It’s the only way to truly protect you. Don’t worry, once I fix you guys you won’t be so scared.”

Zane went back to breaking down the door. Kai and Lloyd joined him and started pleaded with the others to let them all in so they could help them.

-Ivy

#Mod Ivy #ninjago #lego ninjago #Overkill AU #i think?#working title #you asked for Zane content #blursed ninjago aus #blursed ninjago snippets

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