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#anyway! sleep now! please go to bed
exopelagic · 4 months
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Someone help I sunk cost fallacied my way into still working at 3:30am this work isn’t even important but I’m not done >:(
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lincolnlogsnfrogs · 8 months
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i was really tired and stressed today and this bullshit is the result lmao
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thekintsugidyke · 1 year
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watched a podcast with roberta today where she talks about her coming out process and the whole figuring out she was a lesbian and it was so intense. I kept thinking about how she’s mentioned that on aloto they all contributed to the creation and backstories of the characters, and kelly has also talked about all her suggestions and the 40 page doc for Jess and how some things are so similar to herself and so on.
So it got me thinking about Lupe’s backstory AGAIN. More specifically if Roberta also drew some connection to herself with the character. The religious latine background is there in full, and it must have been Something to play it. but there’s also the late-bloomeness of it that Roberta talks about in the podcast, how much she tried to overcompensate in some things even though she wasn’t fully conscious of “oh, I’m gay”. And I can see that with Lupe so much, in how she is clearly uncomfortable with the dresses and charm school and the whole femininity performance, while at the same time showing a kind of resignation towards it, like she’d done it before and had learned how to do it in an almost adequate way, a passable way.
Bottom line is I’m still so fucking hung up on Lupe’s baggage and how little we got to see of it while also having a lot of information thrown at us. And Roberta is so fucking elusive and private even in settings where she’s there to talk about those things.
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sunliv · 10 months
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Concept: Sonic going to Soleanna for some reason, bumping into Elise and they just lock eyes for a second with the weirdest sense of deja vu.
“Have I… met you before?”
YES YES!! EXACTLY EXACTLY!!
it seems like in canon sonic actually remembers the events of 06, at least somewhat, but the ending of 06 is super open and seems to hint that something feels familiar so i LOVE this idea
they feel SO familiar for some reason. Have we met before? she swears she's seen those eyes before, he swears he's heard her laugh before. how do i know you? And they dont know! But that sense of familiarity makes them feel like theyre closer and they get to know each other, bit by bit, relearning about each other!!!
Sonic is just visiting the country for some reason or another, maybe it's a different celebration that's happening or maybe it's the sun festival, a different year and a different timeline but it's still there or maybe he's just sightseeing.
he's heard the sunsets are gorgeous this time of the year, that the canals reflect the light like an all consuming fire and he's so caught up in admiring all the beautiful buildings and towers that he doesn't realize someone's in front of him.
he bumps into them and they almost fall except he catches them before that can happen, of course, he holds them lightly while he stabilizes them on their feet. obviously they're human because of the height difference and he doesn't see their face.
as soon as they're alright he looks up and he opens his mouth with something akin to "sorry about that" on the tip of his tongue except something happens before he can even really begin his sentence.
emerald meets sapphire and Sonic blinks and it's like a lifetime just flashed before his eyes but it was all too fast, even for him, and he's just left with the vague sensation of having stared into those eyes before.
it seems like the stranger had the same sensation because her mouth also parts and she looks at him in some familiar way too,
"have we... met before?"
it's a strange feeling. like he's known this person before, he barely held onto her but he knows how her hand feels in his and she's only spoken a couple of words to him, yet he knows, somehow, he knows that he could pick out her laugh from a crowd.
it's like something he forgot. but he forgot, he can't remember, that's just how that works and though he's not sure how he knows what her laugh sounds like, he'd like to hear it again. make sure it's as authentic as his memory tells him it is.
Well. No time like the present.
"Don't think so.” he smirks. “I'm Sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog!"
He does a little one-finger salute and the stranger smiles with something like fondness and nostalgia.
"I'm Elise."
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solardee · 1 year
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Hello there!
So I know I don't exactly post much other than the occasional sporadic posting session, but a quick update.
Thanks to all the wild temperatures we've had lately the pipes in this old house of mine are struggling. In March I had 2 pipes burst in a minor fashion, but December has decided that a single exploding toilet and 600 Gallons of water on my floor wasn't enough lol.
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We've gone without any running water since Christmas Eve with this latest pipe explosion and we're only just now able to get it fixed... for $1200 (+$100 Service Fee).
I'm pretty low on funds right now, and I have more bills incoming, including the water bill for next month which is going to be HIGH due to all this wasted water (If I can't get a phone call in and get reduced charges.)
If you're interested in giving me a hand, I'm briefly opening small commissions on my KoFi page!
$5 - Gets a Colored Sketch
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$10 - Gets Full Line art
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$15 - Gets Fully rendered colors!
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No more than 2 characters per request please, and no backgrounds. I know it's not a lot, but on top of my full time job this is all I can offer unfortunately.
Thank you for your time, any support is greatly appreciated!
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miallurk · 5 months
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In these days i realized i like art and writing and creating and shopping and taking walks and talking to people and cleaning and helping and studying and doing things but i'm just. too stressed, tired and burned out to do them. How great!
#i am losing my sanity day by day#drowning myself in the nearby lake seems better and better every day#why am i even writing this i have literally no mutuals or even people who'd care about#don't mind me crying myself to sleep haha#ooooh look at this pathetic baby. sitting in their little bed crying stupid tears. i should at least get tissues now while my crying isn't#fuck history fuck school and fuck me i quess#am i gonna start treating this as an actual blog and make a sideblog for reblogs? who knows! certainly not me; stay tuned for the story!#i'm gonna go and just let it all out into a pillow#vent ig#my mom is blasting holiday music in the other room lol#nice to have a whatever the fuck im having while “jingle bells” plays#at least i'm not hearing mariah carey ig#anyway i've probably hadn't been taking care of myself lately it has been worse despite me promoting it to everyone who needs#when i vented last time and it wasn't taken seriously so woop#anyway imma go try to calm myself and back to my notes i go#please gods what did i do to deserve thi s shit. fuck you#i hate it here i really do. i hate when these people talk to me i hate them. i at least can be sorta accquaitances with one but they just.#all stare and laugh? i actually can't. like i'm some fucking clown and laughing stock. just kill me at this point. i have been enduring this#for YEARS and suddenly i'm being a little bitch about it?? what the fuck. why am i so mushy all of a sudden. being shown an ounce of respect#and care made me expect it more? fuck#i'm just setting myself up for failure. i am just a giant loser and failure of a person.#everything seems so fucking hard. and pointless. i am tearing my rotten little heart apart with this. i am once again grieving things#long ago and things i never had. my everything has to be pleasing to an outsider#my value is my suffering. am i breaking enough? is this beautiful to look at#at my self destruction? i hate myself. i treat others so cruelly. i am a horrible fucking person.#my problems are not their burden - i forced it on them. wept like a baby because she left me. and what happened in the end? my paranoia got#to me. i left them. i fucking. i fid the thing i was afraid of being done to me.#this is showing so many issues.#so many things wrong with me. i shouldn't even be alive by this point - i wasn't supposed to survive past 12#i am being forced to do this every day. someone please just end my fu king suffering
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bittwitchy · 8 months
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CS(iblings): Joaquin Phoenix and Robert Pattinson.
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intertexts · 3 months
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hm.
#how do i tell my sister that while i appreciate the thought it is in fact not nicer if she takes the couch occasionally and lets me have my#room sometimes. first of all i HATE disruptions like this it's kind of even more distressing 2 be able 2 sleep in#my own room for one night and then i can't again!!! that sucks net zero!!! second of all She Has My Quilt.... trying very hard 2 be normal#and chill about this and not like it's one of the few things i really really really hate other people using & causes me distress etc.#also like i explicitly said 'hey haha don't do this please' & then she did anyway. which she does!!! i forgot about that!!!#also like man i dont fucking want to sleep on someone's used sheets & blankets that's gross. so im arguably less cosy than i would be. gggh#this all seems like.... very minor and stupid im sure however man im like constantly in a state of middling to severe distress over this#shit. because i in fact also hate people going through my shit or being in my room and also having no privacy however#im very good with suppressing and or masking how much i hate it usually!!!!! but dude she fucking hung her laundry & underclothes#to dry or air on top of my fucking books on my shelves. like. ghghhh hate it hate it cant SAY i hate it because of the everything!!!#ok. sorry. minor pressure cooker escape valve complaining over now im gonna go sleep awkwardly on top of the blankets on my own bed with#some throw blankets. leaving my door open for the beafts if she closes it in the morning bc she thinks she knows what i want ill scream.#txt#neg#this is like private kvetching btw ok i love her dearly it's just unbelievably frustrating.
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theyarebothgunshot · 11 months
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kakusu-shipping · 1 year
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Encase anyone was wondering why I’m blogging at 6 in the morning, yesterday was not a good day for me and I forgot to sleep.
#Emile's Arts#Mario quickly becoming the go To Comfort Character#An INTERESTING development for me at 23 years old#People are SCARY man that's. That's the lesson of yesterday#People are very very scary even when they're not meaning to be#Anyway I'm fine NOW#And I was never in a situation where this kind of reaction was deserved#I'm just a coward#Me at Mario at 4am because we both have anxiety based insomnia#The only Mental illness Luigi DOESN'T have he's out like a rock in his own bed#This is my SECOND polycule where the dynamic is;#Trauma based Insomnia + Nightmare Based Insomnia + Guy who could sleep through a hurricane#Cool great awesome this cannot keep happening to me#People can be SO intimidating without even trying and without knowing and never know ya know??#One time ONE TIME Zayne told me I seemed like an Intimidating/Scary and Pushy Person and it stuck with me SO hard#If you think I'm scary now I'm not PLEASE don't think that I'm a mouse a little guy please understand#YES I use to be in a fight club but now my bones are glass and I can't speak to another human being with my mouth words#I am NOT scary PLEASE believe me I am but a little dude#What is the point of this??#I dunno I think I'm venting#Is this what venting is???#My brothers are scary is the point I was on I have 3 very big very opinionated and very hard headed older brothers#And all three of them terrify me without knowing it#And how could I tell them that??? and what would come out of telling them that???#They're not going to CHANGE there's not a thing I could do or say to change this dynamic we have#Thank GOD I have parents who love every little bit of who I am or I would simply have absolutely nothing#What IS this post fdkgjdfkgjkdf#Mario my beloved Brother of all time safety and comfort and care#Everyone always talks about Daddy/Mommy Issues but where's the support group for Brother Issues#For Siblings who were totally traumatized by their older Brothers huh??? Where's that???
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running-in-the-dark · 6 months
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I didn't watch a single episode of Leverage today and I'm too tired to watch one now and it's making me really sad 😔
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voltazar · 6 months
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what the fuck am i doing with my life at 6 am?
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bednbunfast · 8 months
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eepy
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mrfoox · 8 months
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It's 6.30 and I'm prepared and in bed 🫡
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tardis--dreams · 11 months
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I can write 5 term papers à 8000 words in 2 months!
#while moving out of my apartment here and moving to a different continent#(((and going through some serious withdrawal symptoms that i will simply not acknowledge)))#that's gonna be so much fun#i was gonna drop out of university just a few hours ago#now I'm dedicated to get this bitch of a degree and if it kills me#if i write all these stupid papers i have only one big module left and could finish by next year's Wintersemester#and seriously who even cares about grades anymore#I'll just bullshit everything#my mother called me out for sabotaging myself by being afraid of imperfection so fuck me i guess#it's true though#and i Will write these bitches (please for the love of god let the deadline not be August 31 for all of them#let it be September 30 at least#maybe later? (delusional))#anyway#I'm finishing my stupid presentation now and then in 8 hours will present this shit then go to buy my travel supplies#then go back home and pack my stuff nice and neatly#maybe eat something and work out if I'm not too exhausted and then GO TO BED so i can get maybe 5 hours of sleep#AND THEN DUBLIN#I'm unreasonably excited by now#girl keep your expectations low ffs#I'm just also very excited for dublin tbh#i wish i had more time there#but i will go to my favorite bookstore (if it's still there ㅠㅠ) and walk through the whole inner city for the entire evening and drown#in nostalgia#(and maybe check out trinity college if there's a concert happening there already- although i think i arrive too late#to see how the queuing is handled there)#void screams#yeah no the original topic of this post was news to me as well when i finished my little dublin ramble
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iguessitsjustme · 2 years
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