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“You don’t listen do you? You just ask the same questions every week. How is your job? Are you having any negative thoughts? All I have, are negative thoughts.”

Joker (2019) dir. Todd Phillips

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Remember that time when all these celebrity award shows were fun because Joker was getting recognition and was Once Upon a Time… In Hollywood was too? And Joaquin Phoenix won best actor a bunch of times and Leonardo DiCaprio was there and Brad Pitt won an Oscar for Best Supporting actor. And oooo girl the anticipation of will Joaquin win Best Actor© during this year’s Oscars and just the red carpet fun shit that was finally, finally fun?

Those were some damn good times.

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“For my goddess”

Self-explanatory title. I love your work, I love it, and even words feel insufficient to describe it.

You deserve more than a happy birthday, you deserve a happy life. This is a small gift that I prepared for you, so happy belated birthday @joaquinfeed​!

I tried to do something completely fluffy, but Arthur was horny af, man, I couldn’t help it. It’s not smut, but there are a few words that no nun would be proud of. Anyway, if any of this makes you feel uncomfortable, let me know and I’ll delete it ASAP.

English is not my first language, sorry for the monstrous typos.

Word count: 580

Thousands of golden threads distilled through the window, the heat of dawn whispered to your skin that it was time to wake up, along with those joyful little birds whistling soothing notes as a background melody.

You rolled drowsy towards Arthur’s side, your eyes fluttered open finding that, instead of your sweet Snuggle Buddy resting on the pillow, a cute little balloon puppy was staring at you with its flirty Sharpie-drawn eyes.

Arthur was watching you intently from across the room and as soon as he saw you smile at his rubber artifact, a sigh of poetic essence escaped from his delicately chiseled lips:

“Have you ever seen an angel wake up?”

You giggled like a bewildered little girl as you sat on the bed, blushing slightly at the adorable comment.

“Me neither.”

Arthur laughed cheekily, coming over to sit next to your legs and looking at you as if you were a Michelangelo sculpture that has come to life.

“I bought something for my goddess”

“Dork!”

You cackled while Arthur rushed to pull a pink cardboard box out from under the bed and placed it on your lap.

He ducked his head with a shy smile as you read what it said on the cover:

Happy birthday Snuggles!

To Y/N I love you

From Arthur, your boyfren

“My boyfren” You thought as you smiled at him, immense gratitude flooding your eyes.

“Oh, Y/N! Before you open it…. I just want you to remember that I will..”

He cleared his throat; he was feeling a little nervous but he didn’t want you to notice, he had other plans.

 “I will always be with you, even if you don’t see me, even if you don’t fa…feel me, I will always be by your side, love. Because we knew it from the moment we met, right? We knew that you and I are one…. and-so this is my, this is my way of telling you that.”

He leaned in to give you an Eskimo kiss, pressing his forehead against yours; so close was he that you could feel his hot, uneven breathing and a coy smile of excitement on his lips as he kissed you.

Once the kiss was over, he ran his hand through his hair in awe, unable to contain a breathless “wow”

Eager to open the box, you removed the lid without thinking twice … And as soon as you did, you felt your heart pounding hard and your eyes began to dampen without remedy at what was inside:

A brand new mustard yellow hooded jacket

“Art–”

“Oop, before we start crying…there’s…”

He paused as one corner of his mouth curled up in a wicked grin, the tender gaze from before being replaced by a mischievous one, just like his now unrecognizable and tempting voice. Arthur never wore that smile, unless…

He began to trace small swirls with his index finger on the surface of your thigh, gliding in full concentration like a lewd snake until he reached your heated groin, covered only by the thin fabric of your shorts.

Once there, he traced the line of your groin downhill until his fingernail could lightly press your clit *

He brushed his nail against it in a playful way, up and down, as if your genitals were the most enticing “scratch and win”, and made a juicy, cocky click with his tongue before gasping his last intelligible words:

“There’s something else I need you to open…”

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People break down into two groups. When they experience something lucky, group number one sees it as more than luck, more than coincidence. They see it as a sign, evidence, that there is someone up there, watching out for them. Group number two sees it as just pure luck. Just a happy turn of chance. I’m sure the people in group number two are looking at those fourteen lights in a very suspicious way. For them, the situation is a fifty-fifty. Could be bad, could be good. But deep down, they feel that whatever happens, they’re on their own. And that fills them with fear. Yeah, there are those people. But there’s a whole lot of people in group number one. When they see those fourteen lights, they’re looking at a miracle. And deep down, they feel that whatever’s going to happen, there will be someone there to help them. And that fills them with hope. See what you have to ask yourself is what kind of person are you? Are you the kind that sees signs, that sees miracles? Or do you believe that people just get lucky? Or, look at the question this way: Is it possible that there are no coincidences?


Movies Watched in 2019 | Signs (2002) dir. M. Night Shyamalan

mysterioussummer
mysterioussummer
mysterioussummer
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Hi, can I request headcannons for Arthur? I thought maybe his s/o is a standup comedian, but her jokes are kinda self deprecating and he confronts her about it? I totally understand if It's not something you wanna write, but I had this idea in my mind for a very long time. My self esteem is nonexistent and I'm bad at comforting myself, so I thought I'd request something... Thank you so much (even if you decide to not write it ^^)

I can really relate to this - if Arthur heard the way I talk to myself he would be angry, for sure. So I hope you’ll find some comfort in this. I know I did.

Warnings for self-deprecation, smoking. Swearing.

Word count: 939.

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Originally posted by bills-skarsgards

  • The two of you had met at Pogo’s one night; you were on after Arthur was, and you had cheered for him. You had found his jokes funny.
  • He had been about to leave after his performance, but he had seen you get out of your seat and come towards the stage, so he had waited for you; the kind stranger.
  • In you had he found someone with the same dark sense of humour; his, rooted in astute observations and sarcasm and yours rooted in self-deprecation.
  • As you had left Pogo’s, you had found Arthur on the stairs and the two of you had gotten to talking.
  • And so it was that, over weeks and months did the two of you form a close friendship which passed unnoticed into a relationship, so profound was the bond between you that nothing needed to be said.
  • One night were the two of you sat on the living room sofa.
  • Arthur had his battered brown journal open on his bouncing knees. 
  • Periodically did he chuckle to himself, take a long, deep drag on his cigarette and switch hands while he wrote something down.
  • Oh, how beautiful he was.
  • “Hey, Y/N?”
  • You hummed to acknowledge that your love had spoken.
  • “How’s this?” You looked up to see Arthur swallow thickly in nervousness and then he took a deep breath, “What did the kid with no hands get for his birthday?”
  • Oh, this was gonna be bad. “I don’t know, what?”
  • Arthur shrugged, already grinning at his punchline. “No idea, he still hasn’t figured out how to open it yet.”
  • Your jaw dropped and you burst into laughter.
  • Arthur was practically glowing, so happy was he with your reaction to his joke.
  • “That was really good, Arthur,” You were still grinning and Arthur ducked his head down, a light pink blush dusted across his cheeks.
  • “Thank you. You’re always really kind to me, Y/N.”
  • “You’re welcome.” 
  • You went back to your own jokes but then Arthur shuffled closer towards you on the sofa and you knew what he wanted.
  • “Okay, how’s this?” You looked for a really good joke to tell him and found a little tidbit you’d scribbled late last night -
  • “To all the people who said I would ruin my life - congrats, you were right.”
  • Arthur didn’t respond. You kept your eyes fixed on your notebook.
  • “Or, ooh, here’s another one - my parents said I should always be myself. I don’t think they meant to be the family disappointment but, hey, someone’s gotta do it.”
  • Silence.
  • Stone. Cold. Silence.
  • You looked up to see that Arthur’s brows were heavily creased, his green eyes darkened and his jaw muscles ticking in his anger.
  • “Do you ever really hear yourself, Y/N?”
  • His voice was low, soft… dangerous.
  • Oh shit oh shit oh shi - 
  • Your forehead was growing hot, and you felt immense regret and a sense that you needed to run and hide.
  • “Yeah,” You shrugged, “It’s all true, though, and I - “
  • A deep inhale, and a shaky exhale.
  • You refused to look Arthur. You could feel his gaze on you.
  • “Do you really believe that?”
  • You shrugged. “Well, yeah, I mean - it’s obvious, I’m not even any go - “
  • Arthur snapped.
  • “W-why would you - why would you even say those things, Y/N?”
  • “It’s just a joke, Arthur.” You were starting to get defensive now. It was irrational, but it had just been a joke.
  • But it hadn’t and you both knew it.
  • It’s just that Arthur was calling you out on it, now.
  • “It’s not, Y/N. Do you think I don’t see the look on your face when you’re working on your material? Do you think I don’t notice the way you look at yourself, the way you treat yourself?”
  • Arthur sighed and then scooted towards you so that he could take both of your hands in his, his thumbs rubbing soothingly along the backs of your hands.
  • His journal fell to the floor, unnoticed.
  • Just like Arthur.
  • “I… I love you, Y/N. It hurts to hear you say those - those lies. I don’t need you to apologise. I just need you to realise the way that you speak about yourself isn’t okay.”
  • You didn’t say anything. What was there to say?
  • Arthur wasn’t finished, however.
  • “Can you - I know it’s for your show, but can you - try - to find something else to joke about? You’re not a joke, Y/N, you’re not some - some punchline to be laughed at. You’re you and you’re beautiful and I can’t - won’t listen to you when you’re talking like this. You deserve better.”
  • You nodded, feeling ashamed. “I’m sorry, Arthur.”
  • “Oh, honey, no,” Arthur cooed in sympathy and let go of your hands, instead wrapping his arms around you. “It’s okay. You just gotta’ learn to joke about something else. Like me.”
  • “You’re not a joke, Arthur, how can you - “ Ohhhhh… nicely done, Arthur. “Point taken.”
  • Arthur giggled and pressed a tender kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering against your skin.
  • Silence fell for another few moments, Arthur rocking you slightly, and then - 
  • “What’s yellow and can’t swim?”
  • “I don’t know, what?”
  • “A bus full of people.”
  • You gasped and laughed in slight shock, not knowing how else to react. “Arthur!”
  • A chuckle was your only response, and as Arthur hummed and pressed another kiss to your temple, you turned your head so that you could capture his lips with your own, and you felt a much neglected part of you click back into place, click back home.

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