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edslacefront · 6 months

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We know for a fact that Stede's a Leo historically (and I think it adds up w his character) but hottake: I think Ed's a Leo too, I was torn between that and Gemini, he's a dramatic know-it-all, but I think he def has Gemini goin on in his chart. I think Stede and Ed actually must have fairly similar charts, like they're actually so similar as people besides the way they grew up and that's why they get along so well ya know? Anyway as an astrology ho this is my shot at Ed and Stede's top 6 in their charts, shouting it into the void:

Stede-

A lot of fire and air in this one that's just the vibe I get, he's passionate and longs for adventure, he's actually quite clever but can be a little insensitive sometimes, yet somehow also attentive to those he cares about.

Sun- Leo (as stated earlier) I feel like this one needs little explanation (I end up talking more about his sun sign when I compare him to Ed later when talking about Ed's sun, see below lol) Dramatic, theatrical, draws attention, flamboyant, just listing synonyms at this point

Moon- Libra, At first I thought he'd have a water moon bc he can be quite emotional, but I think thats just the outwardness of his Leo placements. he has this ability to set his feelings aside like an air sign, like when he saved the crew even after Ed died, and then went to mourn in private, although he seems dramatic emotionally he has an ability to detach himself, he forgives quite easily which is a trait ive seen a lot in Libra moons, he has a lot of faith in people. His relationships w others are very important to him, an air moon just makes sense w his whim-prone-ness

Rising- Leo (again ik), he's dramatic asf likes to make a theatrical entrance, draws a lot of attention to himself and cares a lot about his appearance, puts on a confident facade over his cripplingly insecure self in true Leo fashion, is a natural entertainer when he starts to get attention in man on fire

Mercury- Libra (again ik I swear I know about more than two signs) , had to be an air sign he can chat and chat and chat, Ed and him can talk for hours they gotta both have air mercurys, he can also be quite charming in his banter like when he charms Anne Bonnie and Hellcat Maggie like he's a little bit of a flirt even when he doesn't intent to be, he can also be so shady and cunty when he wants to tho, like this dude likes to stur the pot as a strategy kind of lives for the drama, he can be quite clever when he's in a pinch and can always talk himself out of a situation, his bullshitting ability is off the charts

Venus- Taurus, at first I thought he'd have like no earth, but I think he's a little bit more practical in love with the way he thought going to China was too fast, He's still a very attentive lover tho, with Taurus ruled by Venus, he offers Ed a lot of comfort, he's very calming to Ed with his presence and very patient with Ed, he's stubborn in love he never gives up on finding Ed/never loses faith in their love, a real romantic w his cheesy poetry in his letters, immediately shows Ed all of his fancy stuff and that's what initially kind of draws Ed to him, got that luxurious appeal that finer things in life swag

Mars- Libra (AGAIN IK, but a Libra stellium just makes sense to me, not trying to make him seem one dimensional I just get this vibe so strong I swear I'm not just going off stereotypes) This man's always solving conflict or being avoident of his problems, like it's always his tactic, like when he turns Neds crew against him by pointing out that they're being treated unfairly. He prefers for things to be harmonious

Ed:

I think this dude is a chaotic concoction of distributed fire water and air, no practical earth in this mf

Sun- Leo. I just think they both have to be Leo's, Ed is just as dramatic and it's like the world seems to revolve around him at times (like the sun, Leo's ruled by the sun, haha) he just gives such strong Leo-ness w this mane he's got (him and Stede both have excellent hair as a defined feature now that I'm thinking about it) and his facade of confidence is just pure Leo. Him and Stede can both get jealous in a Leo way, like when the other gets all the attention. They both can be a little egotistical and can be kind yet also not take others feelings into account before thinking of their own, like being considerate is not always their first instinct.

Moon- Scorpio. MAN does this boy get HURT. He lashes out asf he is so sensitive. Izzy says "Stede" once and gets fucking shot don't u dare point out what this dude is upset about. He feels things so intensely, doing dramatic shit getting emo w it, gets absolutely consumed by his feelings, had to have a water moon he's a whole tsunami. He's not so secretive w how he feels like maybe the average Scorpio moon but I think the Leo brings it out. This is where Stede and Ed have to figure out how to communicate their feelings w this air and water combo but I think Stede's Libra moon takes the time to understand Ed and how he's caused hurt.

Rising- Gemini. Infamous. Regarded as highly skilled "He's histories greatest tactition", u never know his next move, never shuts up, either introducing himself like "hey everybody I'm blackbeard : )" or "I'm the fucking Devil", the talk of the town, been there done that knows everybody

Mercury- Also Gemini. Like I said he never shuts up, him and Stede talk each other's ears off w these air mercurys, always bouncing between topics, good story teller, him and Stede both, he's always fuckin yelling in my experience Geminis r loud talkers. Goes on rants talks like a nut job. And he's sooo so intelligent his brain is going a million miles a minute, good at memorizing information it makes him a good pirate. Geminis get so eclectic w what they know and they're so so clever and witty and snarky "that's blackbeard, I'm Stede remember."

Venus- Pisces. This dude longs for sweet and delicate affection, he's got these princess doe-eyes, fluttering his lashes and shit, he falls fast for Stede, romanticizes shit, he gets lost and infatuated and day dreamy w shit. He imagined Stede as a beautiful mermaid coming to save him for fucks sake. He's a *sighs* and looks out the window yearningly mf. He PINES like no other. Immediately wanted to watch Stede while he sleeps and switch clothes and go to China, an idealist. I think this matches w Stede so well bc Stede's also a romantic, writing letters and shit, Stede butters him up, but Stede had the ability to remind Ed to be a bit more grounded. They're both so tender ugh they both like to comfort each other ugh

Mars- Aries. He can be quite childish and gets set off by one thing, he has a quick temper, outbursts of yelling, like his rage builds up intense and fast and then burns out, like he literally throws tantrums like when Izzy was pestering him about the plan and then he's like "EVERYTHINGS SO FUCKING BORING". when he's angry he's all consumed and murderous. In my experience an Aries Mars is most likely to smash a chair against the wall and throw a Vase, but then forgive after one conversation bc of how fast burning they r like a bomb and then quiet, returning to that childlike play fullness an Aries has, does shit like play knife parade bc that's their sense of fun, spiteful and gets embarrassed, like when he leaves the fancy dinner table like "YOUR ALL PHONIES" and then is like I've gotta shoot all of them.

Anyways if u read all of this (I doubt anyone will) thanks for listening to my shout into the void, if u disagree pls be gentle lol.

#blackbonnet #ed teach #ed x stede #edward teach #gentlebeard #ofmd spoilers #blackbeard #ofmd #stede bonnet #astrology #ofmd s2 #ofmd fandom

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charmedreincarnation · 1 year

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Hi Charmᵕ̈,

I wanted to dm and ask but then thought more people could benefit from your answer so my question is...

How do you feel in your day to day life knowing something your peers don't? Or rather, having done something most people will die without ever experiencing (getting into the void and waking up somewhere completely different)

I'm just really curious what it must feel like! Seeing people struggle in day to day activities when you know, experientially, you could change your life just like that 🫰🏻; I'm imagining there must be a general ease with which you live now that wasn't there prior void?

PS. Your blog is lovely, thank you so much for all the involvement and the fact that you're still here to give advice 🕊🏹🤍💌

Hi bb ty for this ask, bc this is something I struggled with for a while. I used to feel so bad and it was so unhealthy for me. I felt like I was some beholding omnipotent being and I could help so many people and that was my job. But the truth is even if you spoke the law from the rooftops in every city and home , no one would care unless they had the will to.

1. I talk about the law to everyone who meets me tbh. It’s not a secret trust me. Maybe not the same way I talk to people here but everyone knows me as the manifesting astrology delulu girl. When people ask me how I have straight As without studying, I straight up tell them I manifest it. I tell people I use to practice driving while lucid dreaming and that’s how I overcame my fear. When people ask how I don’t have a job in college, but spend a lot, I tell them money always come into my account and it never hits 0, so I don’t worry about that. I straight up tell tell them how I write all my desires down and they come to life just because I say so. Most people either don’t care, don’t believe me, or assume i was just born privileged even if I explain I wasn’t.

2.you’re not special. And not the way you think. You are a special bright star, as a person and I love you of course, but you’re not special about knowing the law. Most people know about the law whether they know what it’s called or not. Some people even know about the law and still don’t care or apply it differently to their lives than now we do, and that’s okay.

3. Some people know the law and don’t care, simply because they don’t. Maybe they already like their life, maybe they don’t believe it, maybe they prefer to follow their religious practices. Idk but a lot of time I tell friends about the manifesting practice I’ve been using and it’s not like they make fun of me.. but they’re just not into that stuff like I am, and they don’t care. I will go on rambles about how we can have whatever we want in this life, and they’re just like “okay nice .. anyways I hate matthew so much” That’s okay! it doesn’t make you special or enlightened nor does it make them dull and ignorant. Just makes them, them, and you, you. We are god. If they wanted to utilize the law like you have, they would have already. Maybe not today or tomorrow, maybe in another life time, or maybe never idk but that’s not my reality or problem.

4.we as a community gotta drop the hero complex. Trust me I had to work through this in therapy. (Void/manifesting or not, therapy has benefited me in so many ways guys! Get therapy no matter how good your life is. If I were president therapy would be mandated for everyone that’s how hard I ride for it!) but anyways, you’re not going to save the world. Accept that now, it’ll save you the trouble, guilt, and doubt later. Just trust me I could elaborate all day but we all know it’s not realistic or mentally healthy for us. Btw anon this is a shot at myself. not you or anyone else who feels the same 💗

But thank you for your kind words. The point Is don’t compare yourself to other people or try to see your past self in them! It’s not healthy and most people given the chance won’t care or want your delulu advice. In fact most people will make fun of you, it’s just the life we’re in. But I believe the law finds.. well Moreso your will find whatever you need, given who you are. Which is even more of a reason to not give up. Not only did you find the law, you’re still here even with your trials and tribulations, even with the doubt and uncertainty you know it’s real, so that’s really the only thing you should take from the given situation you asked!

But yes life is on easy mode for the most part. But generally it feels the same because I keep myself fulfilled even here! Especially as a shifter it’s easy to feel more grounded here remembering it’s also a reality with amazing people, foods and things to explore. And I will make the most out of it otherwise what’s the point.

*also I use delulu as a positive adjective towards myself everyday. I have reclaimed it in a cute slay way. Being delulu has gotten me my dream life, so yea I’m gonna use that word happily contrary to societies perception of that world <3! Just clarifying bc I know how people get with that word

#law of assumption #manifesation #void state #manifesting #reality shifting #law of attraction

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feelbokkie · 7 months

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Okay bit I absolutely need to know How/What/Why/When your ult bias changed?!? Like?? Was this something that's been cooking for a while or was it just like "hahaha fuck I'm in trouble"?

I'm invested

I need to know 😭😭

Also 🫰🏻🫰🏻🫰🏻

I feel like you’re paying me in Seungmin pics and honestly, I accept.

Anyway long backstory of my bias trip

But if you don’t wanna read all that because it is pretty lengthy the short answer is: yes, it’s been brewing for a while and then suddenly I woke up like “oh no I’m in fucking trouble.”

Full story below the cut

Anyway, I’ve changed my bias a couple of times and most of them were before I started my account.

So originally when I first got into Stray Kids (this was early February bc my brothers funeral was late January and I was in The Void™️) I was a Hyunjin bias. Like technically Felix got me interested in the group, but like what finally pushed me over was that dramatic llama’s dramatic ass because like I love dramatic, sassy people (my favorite member of One Direction the sass master from Doncaster himself, Louis so on brand) (unrelated my biases when I actively listened to GOT7 back when they first debuted were Bam Bam and Jackson and I honestly can’t remember why. It was something that I saw in the show when it was on netflix)

So Hyunjin was my bias for a little bit, and then I discovered Y2K Han and I was wrecked for like nearly a month. Like I knew he wasn’t my bias, but I was really willing to risk it all for him.

And then on March 9 (yes I remember the date) I just had to take the plunge, unfortunately, and buy my first album and it was Maxident. I can’t remember which version it was and I ended up pulling so many Hyunjin cards and then the Felix love letter and the Felix mini poster, but the 2 pcs I pulled being Hyunjin and 1 Han pc was almost poetic. And then i went to get the other vers of the album and kept pulling Hyun so I was like “okay, main bias is fighting for his spot ig”. Briefly forgot about Y2K Han (so sorry)

And then end of March because I love getting into lore of things I’m deep in the fandom of I decided I am going to watch the survival show and then I saw predebut Felix and that was it. That and then kingdom Felix *chefs kiss*. Personality wise, I am so much like Felix and I also tend to go towards people whose personalities are similar to mine so like naturally, Hyunjin, got dethroned Felix end up becoming my ult bias. And then, from March to about right before five star was announced my bias line in this order was Felix, Hyunjin, Han.

Occasionally I was wrecked by Chan, and I was getting worried with that for a little bit. I also got wrecked by I.N once, and I honestly can’t remember why same thing with Lee Know and Changbin but never really Seungmin and because when I was like actively writing and getting into the fandom, like my eyes were pretty much on Felix and the rest of my bias line, I wasn’t like looking to stray (hehe), but then I saw Seungmin smile and I’m pretty sure there was an edit that same day saying how Seungmin hides his smile.

That officially moved him to the bias line from the wrecker line and slowly overtime he’s been making his way up here. I have been buying so many salmon coated things and he was at the bottom of my baseline so I think I have been just kidding myself this whole time because I was also actively buying Seungminphoto cards and I put a Seungmin lomo on my bag and have been carrying it around for weeks And one of my mutuals on here sent me two custom smiling Seungmin photo cards that she made me when we traded.

He very quickly dethrone Han and then and Hyunjin and then for the past couple of weeks I’ve been trying to stay loyal to Felix, but I’m pretty sure on my account I’ve been talking about Minnie way more than I have ever talk about Felix, despite you know me, being Feelbokkie so it really is like “OK yeah I need to to switch my bias at this point”

What finally did it for me was his birthday live because I was in such a depressive hole the past couple weeks. Like Amy knows how bad it was and in that time like I also wasn’t watching any Stray Kids media. I was not consuming anything other than music and writing, I couldn’t/wouldn’t watch anything skz related, and I was finally starting to feel a little bit better when Amy and I were going to watch the second episode skz family and his birthday live came on literally right before and like it made me so happy it kind of gave me like that slightly final push I needed to kind of get out of that depressive hole and I like “oh no like if he can I pull me out of how bad it was and he’s technically not even my bias I think he needs to be my bias”

But my bias line is still the 00’s line and the other 4 are in my wreaker line.

#feelbokkie answers

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desultory-novice · 1 year

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hi. uh. i have recently heard that marx, in the original japanese translation, is implied to have just. always had his powers??????????? this is. so so strange to me. bc of. yknow. similarities to Things In RTDLDX. as well as void termina having similar wings ???????? like ????? it makes so much more sense that he wished to rule popstar so nova granted him the powers so he'd have the capabilities to overthrow anybody who stands in his way (except kirby of course) AND NOVA WAS MADE BY THE ANCIENTS !!! SO!! THE SIMILARITIES IN His POWERS MAKE SENSE!!

is this. unfortunately true? :') and.. if so.. where does it say this and how.. and.. why.. ough ough ough ouhg...

(sorry if you're busy, this is just on-par with Magolor's bombshell of "actually im not from halcandra lmfao" and COMPLETELY shattered everything i thought i knew and i dont know how to find anything about this that better explains it!!)

So, I'm probably the biggest "Marx got his powers from Nova" stan in the fandom (?) and I am more than happy to talk about this! (While noting that, even though I believe in it now, and have "evidence" for it, I accept that things change in Kirby. Until it does, ala "I'm not really from Halcandra," I remain staunchly Nova-Wings)

Anyway, since you said the original Japanese, I went ahead and compiled EVERY line of dialogue relating to Marx in Kirby Super Star / Super Star Ultra! All re-translated by yours truly!

Let's see what it says!

[Instruction Manual]

"The sun and the moon got in a big fight, and now night and day in Dream Land are all jumbled together. Marx the Magician has told Kirby this can be resolved by linking up the planets in the vicinity of Pop Star and summoning the giant comet. What will Kirby do?"

[Opening Cutscene]

"Hey, hey, hey!" / "You want the sun and moon to make up, right?" /"Then you ought to make a wish on the comet, Nova, located in the furthest reaches of the galaxy!" / "But don't go thinking it'll be as easy as all that!" /"To summon Nova, you need to link up all the nearby planets to gather enough energy!" /"It'll be a long journey, but hey, do your best!" /"After all, everyone's counting on you. Good luck!"

[Cutscene 2]

"READY >" / "I WILL GRANT JUST ONE WISH OF YOURS... >"

"Then... I want Pop Star to be all mine!"

"OK > 3 2 1 GO! >"

"I did it! Just like I hoped!" / "The sun and moon fighting? You going on a journey into space?" / "All of it was my part of my perfect little plan!" / "Anyway, Pop Star's mine now!" / "Now I can play all the tricks I want! Sorry not sorry!" (1) / "Ho ho ho ho ho! O ho ho ho ho ho!"

[Starship - Pause Screen]

"The Starship was created with the power of the stars!! Fly, toward Nova's core. Put a stop to Marx's ambitions (2) then have a good meal and a nice nap."

[Starship - Pause Screen - SDX version]

"The light of the Milky Way (3) has gathered and when it cleared, the Star Ship was there. Destroy Marx's ambitions with this!"

[Marx - Pause Screen - SDX version]

"Marx has revealed his true intentions. In order to protect Pop Star, it's time to Fly! Kirby of the Stars!"

I think the issue here is that last part:

"Marx has revealed his true intentions."

Because the bolded text can also interpreted as "true self" and that (plus its usage in other games) has led people to think it is explicitly referring to Marx's exterior. Now, the reason I translated it as "intentions" above is because 正体 can refer to character as well!

Just as an example, when Magolor grabs the Master Crown and reveals his ambitions, you (assuming you were Meta Knight, as he's the only character who would talk like this...) might say to him 「正体を表したな! 」 ("So, you reveal yourself!") even though we know that Magolor's boss form isn't his true form, it's just a transformation.

I'm not here to lecture everyone that this word HAS to specifically be referring to Marx's intentions. The point I want to make is that it is debatable. And it is probably going to remain debatable until Marx makes another appearance and HAL Labs has reason to clarify whether its one way or the other.

(For those who believe Marx's winged form to be his true form, I'd love some theories on why he resembles the Master Crown, Dark Nebula, Void Termina, and other Ancient Artifacts! I really hope we start getting more Marx + Ancients theorizing down the line... Even as a Nova-Wings stan, I'm very interested in this line of thought!)

But, speaking of, I'm such a sap for the Nova-Wings theory I'm going to end this with one more piece of evidence he wasn't born with them...

When you "defeat" Marx, it is visibly only his wings that go haywire. This is another, not often discussed thing that Marx and Magolor have in common. Sure, the fight with Marx doesn't have the cinematic direction that RtDL does, where you can see when using the Ultra Sword that Kirby is striking at the Master Crown, not Magolor, but take that in mind and go backwards. You can assume it is the same with Marx as it was there, because Marx is not yet physically injured, from what we can see.

Ignore the quality. You can watch a non-"upscaled" version for yourself on Youtube and see that his wings start flashing red while lightning arcs across them while he has an expression of shock, not hurt, on his face.

Again, I beg you to remember how the non-cutscene part of the fight ends. Marx stops for just a second mid-air, looking like he's covered in electricity, before his wings cast off stars and start to malfunction, send him rocketing off the screen in the wrong direction. He leaves the surface of the moon (4) while his wings continue to carry him further and further away, out of control until he crashes into Nova.

You, Kirby, didn't technically "defeat" Marx. Like Magolor, who was modeled so closely on him, Marx was yet another victim of an Ancient Artifact going haywire.

And maybe more than we think?!

...But I'll talk about that in another essay I'm working on: "Theme Parks, Mischief, and Corrupted Wishes"

(1) Marx says "Please forgive me!" or maybe "Pweeeeaswe forgive me" if we're going by intent. Basically, he says he's sorry, but the tone he takes makes it particularly snide + cutesy.

I chose "tricks" not mischief because Marx is very particularly speaking about teasing pranks and jokes. I feel like mischief could be read to mean more and the fact that Marx has such simple ambitions leads into the topic of my follow-up essay.

(2) I mentioned this in another post, but the text uses さっさとhere which ostensibly means "quickly" but is used to diminish the task in question. Kirby is treating stopping Marx not as a thing that needs to be rushed because everyone's in great danger but more like because its a nuisance and he needs to get his rest.

(3) They use "Milky Road" in Japanese, which is interesting because the space through Another Dimension is often called "Another Dimension Road." Using Milky Way implies Pop Star is in our universe, but that's what its localized as, so!

(4) Probably it's because of the hearts on his wings, but I've always wondered if Marx's defeat wasn't a subtle reference to Cars' defeat from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure. (Is that a MF Jojo's reference?! XD )

#Kirby #Marx #Marx Kirby #Dess Text Post #If everyone doesn't read this...#...I'm just going to restate it in another essay later XD #I feel that strongly about Marx's wings #Starting to think the wings are to Marx as the crown is to Magolor #Guess they both learned to use their powers?#RtDL DX spoilers

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ev1llesb1an · 7 months

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Documentation of my comphet throughout the years 🧍‍♀️

Okay so I thought it’d be funny to talk abt my most intense male fixation eras as a lesbian (idk i’m just shitposting into the void again) judge me all u want (it is probably needed) but i need ppl to understand the real me 🙏

IT CROPPED HALF HIS FACE OUT but i just realised if you aren’t british ur gonna have no idea who he is anyone (he’s lachlan white from emmerdale) omg this was an ERA everyone around me thought i was going insane (i was) but like they just didn’t get it he slayed so hard at a level that will never be reached (literally) also tom atkinson on sex education was like a full circle moment for me omg but anyways i was like 11-12 here these were literally my formative years this changed me FOREVER don’t judge he slayed omg

THIS okay so u can’t even blame me for this one it’s just correct. yes he’s like walking masculinity stereotype BUT he also had depth and was interesting 😌 the fanfics were SO GOOD this is when i really got into fanfiction and accidentally read smut where someone get pregnant in the hunger games 🧍‍♀️i read this one fic that was like x reader AND THEY STRAIGHT UP BOTH DIED but anyways. i read fanfics abt literally everyone thg character (read abt women and convinced myself i was still straight lmfao) but he was the stand out for me. i recently revisited this era and the fics ppl write on ao3 r INSANE omg like what is wrong with u ppl ( i say this lovingly but also wtf )

OMGOMGOMG BEST ERA OF MY LIFE u actually don’t understand u just had to be there. a solid percentage of my brain even to this day is made up of this man. this is like the stupidest thing ever but when i was like 14 i would just mirror his personality (and tone down the arsehole part obvs) so that i could get more talkative AND IT ACTUALLY WORKED nobody in the whole world will ever understand how much he means to me (i don’t rly understand it myself tbh) and ik ppl literally fuckinf despise him but i will not tolerate the dandy mott slander bc he is literally part of my core identity atp i revisit him every few months just to fully reconnect with my inner being. did anyone read Companion? that shit was crazy also i wrote a fic abt him on wattpad and people actually READ IT so anyways best era of my life it truly never got better i rly hit me peak (i had 0 friends) the few friends i had literally told me i talked abt him too much and it made them like me less 💀

this was arguably my most chill era like yea i was pretty obsessive but with marvel it’s so normalised to be so intense abt everything i kinda just fit right in. there’s too much professor fanfiction r u ppl okay 🧍‍♀️ also more actor fanfiction than i have ever seen for any other man in my LIFE but the capitalism went hard during this era the fluff was so good. arguably my most comforting era? idk i can’t rly explain that one

okay so these two r kinda completely different but also (for obvious reasons) the exact same. gotham was my most openly gay era and for that i will forever be grateful HOWEVER the kristen kringle haters were doing WAY TOO MUCH like she’s already dead why u doing her like that constantly (u will see this sentiment echoed later abt someone else hmmm i wonder who) but yea and then YES i was a paul dano lesbian (literally wasn’t out as lesbian at this point lmao) honestly this is probably the era my friends hated the most they would either awkwardly pretend to agree/care abt the shit i was saying or straight up tell me i was delusional 💀 my friends even now still call it my worst era but i LOVED IT kinda solidified my position at the bottom of the hellish secondary school hierarchy but i still had a good time. the paul dani riddler fanfics r next level tho the way ppl would just post STALKER fics constantly with like zero warnings and it was never labelled as yandere 🧍‍♀️i also got in an argument with a writer on wattpad bc they made the riddler and the oc have like a 6 year age gap and they met when she was 10 and he was like 16 💀 other than that good vibes all round

tbh this era was pretty brief i can’t fully explain what happened here like the vibes were immaculate but also insane WHY IS THERE SM YANDERE FANFIC peter parker is so nice but then in fanfics it’s like 👹 but i rly like spider-man HOWEVER this then led me to my final destination on the comphet journey…

omg were finally at the final stop the peak of comphet ( i came out as lesbian within this era ) arguably not my finest hour bc i swore i would never watch criminal minds bc the number of seasons is WAY TOO MUCH but here we are i watched it bc i read too much fanfic abt this man. i have lots of criticism for the fandom but he in himself is acc a rly good character. this was supposed to be like my ethical era but he’s acc killed like a bunch of ppl and thomas gibson is MESSY (don’t cancel me pls i say that lovingly 🫶) the haley hotchner misogyny nearly killed me off i don’t think i’ve ever been so miserable in a fandom and the fanfics kinda take feminism back a few hundred years but pretty good besides that

anyways there is my brainrot i hope the two (at most) ppl who will read this enjoyed 🫶 LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO im gonna say i posted this in honour of international lesbian day even tho that was several days ago

#criminal minds #aaron hotchner #dandy mott #american horror story #marvel #loki laufeyson #loki #spider man #the hunger games #emmerdale #the batman #dc #paul dano #the riddler

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restforthe-burdenedsoul · 2 months

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Random updates into the void

At my therapy session this week we were talking about the job and aspects I didn’t like, one of them being the social aspect of now working daily with coworkers and how it takes me quite a long time to warm up and trust people and how “masking” is really draining. They asked if I needed recovery time after being social and I said yes, I cannot socialize with friends or anything after work because I’m just so emotionally drained from simple interactions.

The conversation then went into how I mask and I discussed how at my last job I really started to realize how people tend to treat me a little more harsh than others (at the schools) and I started to realize that the other case workers or parents I crossed paths with, the ones that were bubbly and smiley and conversational got better/quicker help/service.

At that point last year, I talked to my very outgoing friend for advice. I did change a lot with how I interact with others thus making things much more draining and hard. Things like over exaggerating my facial expressions, adding more inflections in my voice, asking how people are even tho I don’t care unless we know each other on that level

Then my therapist started asking more neurodivergent questions. I stopped seeking any treatment about this because I’m told I’m too high functioning in life to have any neurodivergence. Like my psychologist who was refusing to give me adhd meds bc “people with adhd can’t get all A’s in grad school”

Anyway, my therapist thinks I may be autistic and had me do some screenings for it of which all were “high chance of autism diagnosis”

They asked if i wanted to pursue a formal diagnosis or treatment and I said maybe, if it could benefit me. Because I have a tendency to hyperfixate on diagnoses I think I have and I don’t want this to be a hyperfixation again.

They said it would likely explain a lot of the reasons I came to therapy. Questions about my identity, rage outbursts, meltdowns, and social challenges.

I think I will pursue the diagnosis in hopes that I can get some accommodations at work. Mainly for them to okay me wearing noise blocking headphones because it’s one of the only things that can pull me out of a meltdown or prevent things from escalating.

We are not allowed to wear them at work, but was told I can play music quietly at my desk. Unfortunately, when I’m stressed out and starting to get overwhelmed, it’s the immersive experience of the music in noise blocking headphones that help soothe me. It’s also very specific music, but that’s neither here nor there.

Was thinking about this because I’m very overstimulated currently from a few different things and I took my lunch early and I’m sitting here with my headphones and like, instant relief.

Feeling kinda validated because it’s something I’ve suspected for a long time and my symptoms, especially the anger/meltdowns that can really interfere with my daily functioning. I’ve been through so much therapy and my anger is the one thing that I can’t seem to fix. It comes on fast and strong and I couldn’t tell you what triggers it. But maybe there’s another angle it can be tackled from a Neurodivergent lens?

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undead-potatoes · 6 months

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I wanna ask that question right back! Which of your OCs is most like you? I'm curious!

I thought about this question for like an hour while trying to sleep last night, and all I'll say is don't do deep self reflection exercises in the dark before bed kids

Also this got kinda long, ops 🙈

Much like you (and I'm sure everyone else) I put pieces of myself into all my OCs, intentionally or otherwise, and so they all have bits of me.

I don't know if it's because he's so fresh in my mind, or if it's because I didn't have too much of a plan going in so he just became a natural reflection of me, but Jay is really high up there on the list.

Loud, talkative, jovial, happiest when he's of help to others, solution oriented and takes most unforeseen problems in his stride. But he's also incredibly self-conscious, and terrified of taking up space or being a bother to someone else, often forgoing his own needs bc it's not THAT important, it's fine. Sorry for existing.

He naturally gravitates towards other people's problems and a wish to help them (whether that's welcome or not), but prefers to stick his head in the sand when it comes to dealing with his own shit. When things get bad emotionally he goes into himself, and can become borderline dissociative, just lost to the void.

He's extremely good at finding stuff other people need but can't find, feeding into this need to be helpful. He's bit of a control freak and perfectionist too, and has to stop himself and call it good enough or he'll go on forever (wow look how topical)

I could honestly keep going but this is long enough as it is 🙈 I have no idea how we ended up here but I guess he's my emotional support self-insert blorbo now, bye.

Still, he's his own character. He's much better with people than I am, especially children, and doesn't have Retsuko-levels of rage bubbling right under the surface at all times. He's more manipulative and mischievous, and small grievances bounce off him easier. I only ignore my problems until I have to deal with them, he actively runs away from his. He's more extroverted than me, and doesn't mind big crowds, while they're the bane of my existence. And so on and so forth.

ANYWAYS this somehow turned into the a Jay post, I'm sorry lmao. His character wasn't really planned at all, I just let him grow naturally from the way I played (kinda like with you and your Aeducan), and once I took a step back and looked at him I was like "hold on a minute, this is just me if I was cool and had extra trauma, what the fuck".

Honorable mentions of pillars of my own personality shoved into other characters go to;

Courier May (F3/NV) - So damn angry all the time about everything, much of it useless and a waste of energy, but it's really hard to turn it off.

Nimri Brosca DA:O) - This applied more to younger me, but I can get REALLY ride or die for someone, like to the point where it becomes a major character flaw.

Pomona Hawke (DA2) - Did you eat? Yes? Are you sure? Are you wearing enough layers? When did you last apply sunscreen? Did you remember to drink enough today? [The mother hen questions goes on for another 5 minutes]. Also everything is always my fault somehow.

Sam Jones (VtM:B) - Just absolutely insufferable about social justice, and the other half of my rage that's an answer to injustice. You've not seen me angry until I've had a whiff of something cruelly unfair.

And because I feel like I've been too negative here;

Ridley (Coral Island) - Hard-working and generous :)c

#Sunny Answers #mightymizora #answer a question like a normal person challenge: [impossible]#it's amazing how much more endearing a lot of my shit seems when it's applied to fictional characters in my head and not me #like irl they're just annoying lskdgjsdg #this honestly feels so scary to post but whatever it's out there now

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buddyhollyscurls · 9 months

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I love you ysblf opinions so much. The ones about Marcela’s attitude are always just *chefs kiss* it seems like nowadays she gets a lot sympathy for being cheated on which is terrible, but for some reason people are obsessed with portraying her as The Only and Only Victim when she had very questionable behaviors: hated and sabotaged Betty since the beginning, didn’t even view her as a woman just because she was ugly and had an inferior financial status ( I have gotten jumped by so many people for pointing this out on YouTube comments 😂) Not saying she was the villain either as Betty clearly was no saint herself, in this story all the characters are flawed which makes them very human. It doesn’t help that the actress who plays her has this very same mindset that Marcela is the victim and Betty the real villain, the fact that Mario rarely, if ever, gets this treatment is bonkers to me since he is the one who concocted everything.

Also, it’s not a bad thing that your character didn’t keep a man who didn’t respect nor love her ( he couldn’t even stand her) way before Betty even came along, I don’t see the big loss about this, it’s actually the best thing that could happen to Marcela. It’s sad that she had to leave her own company, but she’s still getting her monthly checks, she’s still one of the rightful owners and didn’t seem like she wanted to be the president at all. There was even talk that maybe she went to Miami to be in charge of the franchise over there which I think would be a great way for her to remain involved in Ecomoda without having to run into Betty and Armando all the time.

Anyway, this already got so long, but wanted to say again that I live for all your ysblf content and you have a very interesting blog overall.

THIS MESSAGE MADE MY ENTIRE DAY THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! It always boggles my mind when ppl tell me they like or even read my opinions on things I watch/ read/ whatever looool to me it feels like I'm just screaming into the void (not that i mind i have tons of fun doing it lol) and it absolutely makes me so hype when I can interact with others about the same media.

Now on to Marcela! I'm not going to say that she was not hurt or a victim AT ALL in the story, there are times I genuinely feel for her especially in the end when she realizes that Armando had the affair with Betty and she STILL wants to be with him anyway. That's why she gets me more upset as the story progresses bc I'm like GIRL U DO NOT DESERVE THIS YOU ARE SMART BEAUTIFUL SUCCESSFUL A SUPPOSEDLY STRONG WOMAN U DONT NEED TO GO THROUGH ALL THIS FOR A MAN WHO DOES NOT WANT U U SHOULDN’T NEED TO FIGHT TOOTH AND NAIL TO HANG ON TO A MAN. But unfortunately Marcela is her own worst enemy and more than anything I think her character shows that even a rich, beautiful, successful woman can be doomed in love. It's not only "ugly" girls who suffer when finding partners. But yes the few times I feel sorry for her and the manipulation she goes through with Armando are almost swept away by her own choices and the person she is. Classist, Elitist, a bully. I think that's something even Armando sees and even when he wasn't in love with Betty or even dating her Marcelas treatment of her since she got the secretary position was what lifted away the last mist of love he felt for her and u can see that in his interactions with her. Overall, Marcela while I do not particularly like her, is such a complex dimensional character

#sorry this was super long i just have a lot of thoughts on marcela #i cant lie that i do not like her but damn is her character deep #if i ever get into acting i would love to try my hand at a character like this #for the complexity and challenge of it all #anyway #THANK YOU AGAIN SO MUCH FOR THIS MESSAGE #me #personal #answered #asks #anonymous

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bronanlynch · 2 years

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aa1 lawyers ranked by whose file clerk I would rather be

background: I was a file clerk at a law firm for a while and I’ve looked at so many job listings. this doesn’t necessarily reflect how I feel abt the characters, just how I think they’d be as a boss and what the state of their filing is

mia: keeps her office very organized, and I appreciate a woman who knows the value of alphabetical order, even if it does stress me out that she files things by topic instead of by name. loses a point for only knowing how to use her computer for emails because you know that means she’d fuck up every time she had to use the copier. I would still happily send all her faxes because at least she’s nice abt it and probably would give me health insurance. 9/10, sure, I’d work for her

phoenix: probably doesn’t need one because he takes so few cases and he couldn’t afford to pay me anyway. 1/10, he’s not even hiring, this is a pity point

edgeworth: on one hand, very neat and keeps written records of Everything, so there would be a lot to file but it would never be too frustrating, which is ideal tbh. he definitely knows the exact location of every file in his office and doesn’t lose them to the void. on the other hand, he would be mean to me one (1) time and I would decide that he was my nemesis and that I had to prove that I’m better than him. it would be a very petty one-sided rivalry but I would have so much fun drafting passive-aggressive emails. also, I would have no respect for him on a moral level bc of the whole ‘prosecutor who doesn’t care if people are innocent’ thing but like. the place where I used to work defended corporations I’m used to having no respect for the lawyers I work for. 5/10, depends on how long I’ve been jobsearching

von karma: absolutely the fuck not. all of edgeworth’s worst habits (mean & rich & corrupt) combined with his insistence on disregarding rules when it suits him means he would be a fucking nightmare to work for. he would give me something to send to the court at the last second that would be just blatantly put together wrong because he thinks he knows better than the judge and I would have to waste time doing it correctly and then it would get submitted late and he’d yell at me. would also pitch a fit at some poor unsuspecting fedex customer service agent bc the package he sent on friday with next business day delivery didn’t get delivered until the next business day instead of over the weekend. 0/10, I bet his job listing stresses how hard you’ll have to work and doesn’t mention pay or benefits

grossberg: at least he has a receptionist I can gossip with. would hand me a $20 bill and ask if that would be enough to buy more creamer for his coffee (a true story and not just an arrested development bit unfortunately). reminds me of my old job except without the wildly terrible stuff. 7/10, tolerable

payne: exists I guess. probably has one or two super irritating habits but the rest of the time he’s fine so you put up with it. loses points for being a prosecutor though sorry for bringing my real world politics into this. 5/10, less stressful than working for edgeworth but more boring so it balances out

lana: definitely has a very strict system for her files and god help you if you fuck it up but at least she’s consistent and clear abt what she wants and I appreciate that in a boss. same moral disagreements as for edgeworth. 6/10, depends on the benefit package tbh

gregory edgeworth: not enough data but probably fine. based on how edgeworth talks abt him he probably cares abt making sure people have a fair trial and all that, which makes him a better option than almost everyone on this list. 8/10, yeah why not

hammond: again not enough data but I think he’d be similar to grossberg but probably does too many medical records requests and those can be such a pain to scan. still gets points for not working for the prosecutor’s office. 7/10, sure I guess

#sorry that all of my prosecutor rankings are skewed by how much i would not want to work with anyone who's that close to the p*lice #also sorry that my edgeworth answer sounds wildly unhinged no i cannot be normal abt him #this is like. mostly for me to have my Opinions on record before i start aa2 lmao #dreaming.txt #ace attorney

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fandoms-of-a-random-existence · 11 months

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2, 14, 19 for OCverse asks!!

Ohohoho!! I will be completely honest this is the 2nd time I'm typing this all out bc I got distracted by a notification and by the time I got back (3 seconds later) my words had been lost to the void. Anyways! I've got a handful of different projects all running around amuck, but I rolled a dice and today we're gonna talk about [Unnamed Space Train Murder Mystery]!! Admittedly the newest and roughest round the edges but They Are In My Brain <3

Okay whipping out question screenshots for memory purposes!

Well if they weren't paying that much attention it'd probably be like "wait they actually put train tracks in space", "that is a lot of confusing/complicated politics rolling in the background", "Capitalism (extremely derogatory)", and perhaps "wait if that's one of the few characters with a solid name what's with calling him white hair and trauma all the time" (in my defense while Mneme has a solid Working Name TM (honestly the entire concept of Names in this place sure has Layers) white hair and trauma is funnier to me personally)

This is honestly such a hard question bc I am enjoying pretty much all of it (except the writing. Arguably the most important bit. Um. Its fine don't worry about it /j) but I'd say it's the overall worldbuilding and how I can fold character backstories to resonate or build them from the ground up with whatever new nugget of information I've gleaned about this dystopian nightmare land. But also since I mentioned it before it's also the little things like how none of the train workers work under the name they signed their contracts under and how Titles Mean More Than You'd Think and how "true names" depend on who we're talking about, there's one guy who goes by his preferred LAST name and while his sister has a legal name for the contract what she'd consider her "true name" is actually her Working One and I'm just. Brainrot <3

Gosh I think about the train workers SO MUCH there's only a few who are especially plot relevant but the working conditions in Fucked Up Capitalist Dystopia Land are as awful as those words imply. Possibly worse. Can't wait til that gets kicked in. But back to my point!! They've all just got ridiculous bonds to each other they care and support they're so found family what do you mean about that poisoning attempt?? What's a little attempted murder between friends?? (Also while I cannot explain the unhinged dynamics between those two at 3 am, just know 2 seconds after witnessing the person they were trying to poison actually take the cup, in a frantic manner that one would not expect of the person, you know, actually having set this up, the poisoner grabbed the cup, chugged the entire thing and then spent the next week Utterly Miserable (because of drinking poison) also there's another guy who has killed in defense of the others before and Will Kill Again (not the actual plot investigated murder. Honestly this guy's Main Victim (ie, the one he'd most get in trouble for) is actually presumed alive for most if not all the first book or so

Anywhatzits it is now 3 am and I have come to the realization I really should be sleeping now but also! The ocs <333

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lusciouslii · 2 years

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actually yknow what forget that, my kink blog ill post whatever little thoughts i want. even if im just yelling into the void at least i get to yell!

longer rant incoming bc im tired and want this out of my system!!

so i met this guy on feabie and immediately it was super exciting because we go to the same college!!

hes also super fucking hot which was its own weird thing bc ive really never experienced like physical sexual attraction so that was weird. but yeah dude looks good and he has a nice voice so thats already not helping me

we’ve met up a couple times now, once to sorta test the waters, once just to cuddle in my room???? which looking back it was at that point i was straight up fucked because as someone who had recently gotten out of a bad relationship in which all my needs and emotions had been completely neglected, having that kind of sweet and affectionate intimacy?? all while my chubby body is being praised and adored??? never once had that in my LIFE.

the other few times has been pretty lowkey too. we did do a feeding session once but i got sick and it was the most humiliating thing. but he was so nice and caring and we continued to talk afterwards so i just try not to think about it anymore lol

we didnt talk much over the summer since i had to go back home across the country, but he reached out a few times and i was like damn ok im still of interest to him

this semester started great because i planted the seed (aka posted a pic showing i was back over here) knowing he would probably see it and if he’d say anything, and he fucking did he reached out and was excited i was back and wanted to meet up soon. schedules were a little rough but eventually we did!

i felt extra happy because it was sort if spur of the moment decision and he was moving back an online hangout he’d been planning with friends for a couple weeks. so i was like omg he really wants to see me even if only for a little bit thats so nice

and now that we have several months ahead of us we started talking about doing more of a feeder/feedee setup and things like that and im, obviously, super into the idea, and he seemed super into it too!! the dirty things he said to me that night!!!! not fair!!!!!!!

i sent pics later that night bc we talked about it and he said he’d “return the favor” lol but the. like. i sent them and he didn’t say anything until i posted a pic to feabie 🙃 and he was like oh sorry i completely missed your text! which like alright, and he asked me how i was doing and blah blah brief smalltalk

i asked if he wanted to meet up again soon and he said “Yea I’d be down, I gotta see what’s going on tho / need to play it by ear”

now heres where i get all introspective because to me, i dont see why we couldnt just schedule something in the future. unless, that is, hes trying to keep his schedule open for other stuff. i can get that to a certain degree, and i have to like. really ponder on it because i dont want to be some clingy needy girl who is fawning after a guy im not even dating, but its like….idk it makes me feel kinda sad? that im not enough of a priority to want to pick a set day to do something? so idk how to feel about that exactly

anyways i tried asking again some days later and he wasnt free, no surprise, usually when we do something its sorta this impulsive last minute thing, which again like. sorta plays into that whole im not really a priority unless idk youre horny or something

but its weird cause it seems like he does care and does want more than just horny shenanigans? we havent had sex yet and have only even had one actual feeding session. soooo worlds most patient fuckboy if thats the case but i just really dont get those vibes

but also im gullible and see the best in people i care about and thats how i got fucked over in my last relationship

im just feeling pretty sad about the whole thing right now because we talked about doing all these things and i really want that but hes so uncommunicative and im afraid of being obsessive. again, might be on me too because im going in thinking maybe theres a chance to do more

but then again even if there isnt thats FINE i just want to do SOMETHING lmao

so now im just left wanting and thinking about him a lot and oh yeah need i remind WE GO TO THE SAME SCHOOL WHY CANT WE JUST MEET UP CASUALLY ONE AFTERNOON 😭

idk but im afraid of maybe ruining the best relationship ive formed in this kink after figuring out what i wanted from it. god even now im just like “youre thinking too hard about this it doesnt matter that much, youre supposed to be flexible and chill and just go with the flow cause its just a little side thing” but welp. my brain is noisy and i dont have a good outlet. another problem of not having friends in this kink but im not good at responding to people which online is the only way to talk to people and now im just rambling

anyways ending this here and hoping he’ll reach out eventually cause boy does the heart yearn 🥲🥲🥲

#also WOW i pray he doesnt somehow find this #he doesnt have my tumblr #but it wouldnt be too hard to figure out from what he does have

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interlagosed · 2 years

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I know we are on a carlando lockdown atm for obvious reasons, but! ever since you made that post about sewis angst, let me tell you I started Thinking - capital T. literally on my notes app writing this. ngl i suck at writing fr.

let's begin...both of being young in the sport which implies a lot of just being young not fully formed people. They just want to go fast ok..."who's this other kid? ok maybe hes nice...ANYWAY...i get to race!!!!!!"

Then Seb starts winning! and like he has his fun ok - do they get together in 2010-11? possibly... once they were both drunk (were they tho??)- it was HOT + unresolved gay feelings for the both of them - they dont think about it for years until...well they do. They never talk about it, is this their first time with a boy? meh I dont think so, still theyre both young experience is limited for the both of them.

But going back to evil child seb, he is immature and not the best at communicating...the whole webber teammate competitiveness, like a bit of a hothead after all. He goes out, he experiences things, he figures his shit out and is relatively chill about it, he can keep it lowkey. Of course, sprinkle some tension of them seeing the other pick someone up at like idk a party, theyre like "uh good for them" but still they LOOK.

2015 happens and years have passed - seb has matured a lil bit, learnt to be professionally mature and maybe more secure in himself, but also he has never had to undergo all the racist abuse LH always had to face - so like liking guys doesnt feels as much as a freak out. + got hurt a little less by people around him?

Seb goes to ferrari in 2016 and LH keeps winning, but! nico...childhood friends turned maybe lovers around 2015 turned enemies. Personally I wont pretend I know what it feels like to be the only black person in a sport, where you're constantly pushing back against undeserved hate - because well Im not a poc so I have 0 knowledge of that nor I feel comfortable pretending that i can imagine it ??? idk how that would factor into lh growth as an individual. But being black and gay? some internalised homophobia must happen somewhere when you're competing in the most sexist of sports( it is sadly).

anyway, the point is...the whole rosberg drama (i hate that anti vaxxer fuck that guy frankly) happens. see THAT interview where lewis almost looks embarrassed of the things nico is saying about seb feeling bad his teammate didnt finish the race...bc well maybe he has got to know seb a bit better and sue him he likes the guy, he respects him and admires him, therefore the "not all of us think like this". They are not romantic feelings he has for him, the relationship with nico and the championship run definitely are definitely enough for him to not have just the mental capacity to even consider that. But, he does feel connected to seb as a person, bc they've both winners ya know - seb in 2016 still had more championships than lewis. So like nico publicly pulling out all the dirty laundry (is this even an english figure of speech?idk) for the world AND seb to see is humiliating. Also, because he did play into all the mind games and over the top macho bs rosberg pulled that year...and that maybe says something about himself just as much as it does for rosberg. for example idk spain 2016 (idk the chronological order between that interview and the spain gp but oh well this is fantasy anyway its doesnt matter). seb being seb sees this, but still they're professionals and competitors! so he makes a joke about it, keeps it not personal bc wtf?! we are f live doing media, leave me out of your pettiness. Still he is very aware of how f up the dynamic is between the 2, say when he talks to lewis pre races and nico is never mentioned - lewis isnt easy to see through but maybe some times he is (poetic description of lewis staring into the void looking very pensive, seb is looking platonically ty very much).

Say towards the end of the season lh and nico stop being intimately involved, things arent good and lh really needs less of whatever the f is going on there.( Lh being more involved in social matters, more outspoken has played a part so far - or at least it should be mentioned, bc you know lewis too did say some ignorant stuff at some point, changing that shows growth and a more open mind...he grows more serene with the idea of being who he is).

2017 and 2018 seb and lewis are both championships contenders, they get together eventually- end of the 2018 season?you choose. But maybe say there's a whole episode about seb showing basic human decency and being able to separate the on track competition from their off track relationship and lewis going "oh". and then they get together again, the sex is still very much HOT, but it just...isnt done with the intention of hurting the other (aftercare happens!) and then lewis goes "OH". Still, because they're still men and obtuse at that they keep it very casual, but they're both clearly falling for one another (i hate having seb being the one pining after lewis during his early ferrari years- let my boy have his love life while those other 2 destroy each other).

ferrari sucks in this universe too, so like seb has to deal with that, bc disappointment is hard to take for so long. Lewis is there, just honestly trying his best, because he has never had to reconcile him winning with also being there and good for someone he's involved with. lewis doesnt know if hes able to step it up...sebastian deserves the best! whilist seb is there being like why is he even there if every weekend im miserable? followed by a misunderstanding about lewis opening up about nico and snapping at seb bc he feels vulnerable. They're a bit distant for like idk a couple of moths, after all this isnt a relationship is it??? we are being adults about this and not acknowledging any of our feelings.

by 2020 they go on winter break with no plans of seeing each other during those months but then one or the other shows up in monaco/switzerland being like "ive never been casual about this like ever pls be my boyfriend? 🫣🫣"and then the other is ":) of course im absolutely not normal about you either:) " 👨🏼‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏾

ty for coming to worst ted talk ever conceived,prolly conveyed 20% of the angst and feelings i was trying to convey but oh well...im going to sleep. Also, hope tumblr staff wakes the f up :) cheers!

holy shit. presented without comment.

ok maybe one comment: i read this last night while i was half asleep and now i'm reading it in the morning and i'm STILL emotional algjakljga I'M ABSOLUTELY NOT NORMAL ABOUT YOU how is this so romantic LMAO

#hibi answers #AHHHHH #agkajlgjagja #sewis

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diaryofafictive · 2 years

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if glee were still going now and instead of every season being one school year, they were just stuck in this unending timeless void of being in highschool forever, you know they would've done an episode of sexual liberation by now.

Quinn would have a field day with it and whatever her number is it'd go down in glee history as a super fucking weird moment that you only remember during odd hours of the night years after you stop watching. not unlike that song where she got like 6 other pregnant teenagers to dance backup for her while she sang a song about women being oppressed.

also because this is my alternate universe where glee still exists to terrorize us all im deciding that they never stopped writing plotlines for Quinn, and because I'm writing this tumblr post I'm deciding that a recent plot line she had was that she went on a sexual liberation quest and at some point ended up fucking Santana, and oh my god Santana wants to tell people about it soooooooo bad but Quinn made her swear to secrecy so she just has to drop hints around Quinn's boyfriend (ig Finn since I don't like him) about having fucked his girlfriend. she has fun.

anyways Santana would sing Scotty doesn't know and it'd go down in both glee and lesbian history as an absolutely earth shattering life changing event that forced millions of little queer girls all across the planet to suddenly become very aware of their sexual orientations.

I think in general I just like the idea of Santana fucking everyone's partners and holding it over their heads, like when Rachel found out Finn slept with Santana and Santana kept walking over to Rachel and saying shit like "by the way, he bought me dinner afterwards😌✨" and Rachel proceeded to like lose her absolute mind for the rest of the episode. I just love that for her yknow? I like that this is a power she has, she should get to use it more often.

also I like the idea of Quinn being kind of a mentally unstable unpredictable mess, because although a lot of the reason she has that image us bc Ryan Murphy would ignore her all season and then realize oh shit we haven't done anything with Quinn in a while uhh make her get a haircut I guess, I just think it fits for Quinn to be kind of a disaster. so in my heart in this darker timeline where glee still exists, Quinn would get a couple of storylines every season, and the writers would just sort of pull things out of a hat to make her do for the next 10 episodes or so.

whenever she runs for prom queen, and since time doesn't exist here she's ran like 7 times by now, she gets way too invested in winning and the writers use that as an opportunity to give her a good old crazy girl ballad, but they'll still do the glee writer thing where they'll make her have a psychotic break in the school bathroom one episode and then no one ever brings it up, except to make one liners about her mental state and the fact that we probably shouldn't trust her to drive the car when the uht carpool but she refuses to let anyone else take the wheel so we're just going to have to let Santana and Brittany pray for their safety. anyways. that was a lot longer than I thought it'd be thank you for coming to my ted talk

#glee #quinn fabray #santana lopez #if glee was still on #apocalyptic aus #gleek

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anachronistic-falsehood · 8 months

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OK OK OK. i have to run some errands but i am also thinking abt this soo much now so im gonna type out this ask over the course of like the next hour in between things while im thinkin abt it. so i hope its not completely incomprehensible

OK ALEX KNIGHT OF VOID. i was not able to convince a friend abt him bc they are dead set on him being a prince of blood. whcih. shoutout to jonesy for that one because thats ALSO a really good classpect for him. ough. anyway anyway. the reason he is knight of void to me. hear me out this is my void player alex propaganda. void is. lack. void is nothing in the most literal sense. what does alex do. he disappears. thats what kicks off the whole fucking thing right !! alex disappears seemingly without a trace and jay goes looking for him. personally i see the operator as an embodiment of void in the homestuck sense. it takes things, it makes things disappear, it erases memories and redacts information and erases all sense of self in a person and thats how it wins. (theres an argument to be made that it could also be space coded with all the warping around and distortions and things but thats a whole other conversation its void propaganda time now) and alex becomes the one most closely associated with the operator. maybe tim was the source yeah but alex is the one who had the most direct contact with it the entire time. hes a knight because he protects nothing yeah (REALLY good interpretation btw. he thinks hes protecting something but there's nothing there.) but he was also corrupted into protecting the things the operator wanted (burning the tapes, getting rid of evidence, killing everyone associated, etc.) void 2 me is the opposite of light; where light deals in the acquisition of knowledge and understanding, void is the unknown and the unfamiliar and unclear

AND THAT BRINGS US TO. HEIR OF LIGHT JAY. FUCK. hes so heir coded. he didnt ask for this, he wasnt at all involved until alex offered to give him the tapes. he inherited the tapes from alex (who then stole them back and burnt them, void player behavior btw) . jay is soooooo. eye avatar coded also. i dont think youve listwned to tma yet but I know ive talked abt tma entities to u in passing before. ugh it makes me so insane. jay becomes obsessed with knowledge, with uncovering the mysteries, he HAS to Know whats happening. to the point where it becomes unhealthy. if i remember correctly one of the powers of an heir is to become their aspect (john when he turns into wind (?) ) and at a certain point jay . becomes light. in more ways than one if you want to be sappy about it (i do. i want to be sappy about it.) he becomes the knowledge, he becomes the information, his camera is an extention of his body, he's the sole provider of the events of mh through the youtube channel (and when tim picks it up its only because he feels like he needs to finish what jay started) . BUT ALSO. jay becomes . sort of a beacon for the whole thing. hoodie/brian are contacting *jay.* not alex, not tim. alex is hunting down jay for the tapes before tim even gets involved. dont even get me STARTED on jay and tim they make me fucking nuts. they only had each other. say what you will about the unhealthiness of their whole thing but jay was a light in the darkness for tim. he was hiding from everything, ignoring all of his problems and nothing was getting fixed, jay pulled him out of that kicking and screaming and even though they both got SO fucked up in the process ultimately tim escaped and jay was the light that led him out of the tunnel (< pun very much intended. fuck that tunnel). im kind of getting off on a tangent here sorry ive been reading a lot of fics i love them .

HEART PLAYER TIM. HOO BOY. now . hear me out. i know what you may be thinking. "mac you cannot just assign heart players to your favorite characters that is just you projecting." ITS NOT. OK. I JUST HAVE A TYPE WHEN IT COMES TO FAVORITE CHSRACTERS and that type Just So Happens to be full of fucking heart players. anyway. hear me out. tim. cares. so much. tim cares SO much for other people. the onlt reason he pushes people away is because he thinks it will protect them from him because he is so very full of guilt all the time and blames himself for infecting everyone. but he FUCKING CARES. and that i think is a huge huge huge heart player trait. maybe they are not the most pleasant people in the world maybe theyre huge raging assholes that will never admit it (cough cwilbur cough dirk) but DEEP DOWN (sometimes not actually all that deep down) heart players care about their friends so much that it hurts. however. heart players also tend to be super selfish <3 and tim is a knight. so . he protects. he protexts the people he cares about by trying to get them away from him. he also DIRECTLY protects the people he cares about (looking @ the scene in entry 72 hwre he directly stands face to face with the operator in order to protect jay. fuck that is one of my favorite scenes in the whole fucking thing. ) BUT HE IS ALSO SUPER SELFISH. he protects himself. he thinks hes protecting himself by shutting everyone out. he goes off on his own because he thinks thats the safest option. dont even get me STARTED on masky becausde i have a lot of complicated masky thoughts and this is already so very long. but like. u get the idea.

OK FINALLY. BRIAN. MAN. brian makes me so so so sad. doomed from the start motherfucker. he was tims first and best friend and . even though i stand by the fact thay the events of mh should not be blamed on tim. this was also . brians doom . hes so doom player. i also have a lot of complicated hoodie thoughts ans i think i need to rewatch a bunch of the totheark videos before i can fully formulate them all but . brian is. pretty much gone the whole series. he lost his memories and his sense of self so early on, so we see hoodie more than we see brian. brian is doomed to. lose himself basically. and even as hoodie i think he knows this . so all of his focus is on guiding jay, having jay lead him to the ark (still. somewhat unclear on whay the ark actually is . i think i need 2 sit down and just watch the whole series again tbh. so if this sounds like total bullshit pls forgive me i am jusf a little guy) anyway. he OBVIOUSLY knows more than jay does. debatably even more than tim does. how does he know these things! seer behavior. he knows that theyre all fucked though. there are plenty of allusions to death in the totheark videos and. well. despite whether he is actually guilty of this or not, tim certainly blames him for Jay's death. hoodie left them the note that led them to benedict hall which was. the death site for literally 3/4 of the entire group. doom player behavior. he saw that their deaths were inevitable and unavoidable and set pieces in motion to get all of those things to happen because he knew it had to. but hes also really passive with the way he interacts. very rarely does he actually directly give things to jay, most of the time its through codes and indirect contact and simply leading him/guiding him rather than. explicitly directing him. (which. silly side note. enrichment for jays light player tendencies. tossing him a puzzle feeder full of snacks like here you go buddy figure it out except the snacks are his friends' inevitable deaths)

GOD I HOPE ANY OF THIS MAKES SENSE. I AM THINKING ABT THEM SOMUCH DUDE.

LOOKING AT THIS WITH MY EXTREME AUTISM STARE. OGUHGOHGFH. ALEX KNIGHT OF VOID NO UR RIGHT UR SO FUCKING RIGHT. LIKE YES PRINCE OF BLOOD WORKS TOO BUT KNIGHT OF VOID IS SOOOO. AGH. he's gone and that kickstarts the whole thing. yeagh. THE OPERATOR AS AN EMBODIMENT OF VOID MAC I AM GOING TO START EATING GLASS UR INSANE FOR THIS AND ALSO SO SO CORRECT. OH MY GOD. obscuring information, hiding things, taking and taking until there's nothing left. operator lord of void and alex its unwillingly loyal knight. im going to start throwing things AGHHHH!!!!

void is so so the opposite of light which makes heir of light jay SOOOO INTERESTING. trying to achieve the opposite of what alex is doing. obsessed with knowing, with untangling the mysteries, finding out the truth. HE BECOMES THE ASPECT OF LIGHT, OF KNOWLEDGE. HE LOSES HIMSELF IN IT. IT CONSUMES HIM. light players attract attention from the narrative and jay is at the centre of ALL OF IT. HE is the one making the videos and posting them. he is the main character. remember when tim gets mad at jay for posting the videos for the entire world to see??? jay is MAKING THE NARRATIVE. HE IS THE NARRATIVE. HE IS THE MEDIUM THROUGH WHICH WE CONSUME THE STORY. and he will do ANYTHING to expand that narrative and give the people watching more and more information. he wants others to have this knowledge. he IS the light and he will spread information at the detriment of people close to him.

oghhhh don't even get me started on knight of heart time. ohg. he IS selfish!! and he will use that selfishness to protect the people close to him. he cares so so fucking much and it's killing him. and sometimes the best way to protect others is to be away from them no matter how much he doesn't want to be alone. heart is about identity and self. these blackouts he keeps having make him wonder who he even is with the mask on. he doesn't know who he is anymore. he barely knows who everyone else is trying to be anymore. ur so fucking right he is SO heart player coded AGHHHH!!!!! THE GUY EVER!!!

oh my god brian seer of doom drives me fucking insane crazy batshit stupid. holyyyyyy shit. yeah. oh my god. he's known they were doomed from the start. seers are a guidance class meant to nudge the other players on their destined path. he. he does that. he sets things in motion for himself, alex, and jay to die. it was inevitable and he knew that. he gives jay these little puzzles to decode (ENRICHMENT FOR HIS ENCLOSURE!!! seer behaviour <3) he's a shepard guiding them to their deaths I'M GOING 2 BE SICKKKKK!!!! he's always known there's no way for any of this to end without his own death and the deaths of his friends and in typical seer fashion he just kind of. accepts it. pushes the others onto the same path. lets it happen. rose behaviour!!! he's such a doom player but seer is literally such a perfect class for him ohhh my god. yeah yeah yeah. ur so right. i'm going 2 eat my fucking computer <3

#friend tag :3 #whiskeys word soup #AGHHDFGHDJFSKGJG MARBLE HORNETSSSSSSSS #oh my god. ohhh my god #heart player tim drives me fucking insane crazy thank u for this mac thank u #gonna b thinkin abt this for the next WHILE

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