#but also does it matter? because i might be a lesbian since i am very uncomfortable with the idea of romancing a man in any way

[denial-permanente]

This isn’t a question as much as it something I would like share with you and your followers. Since you get a lot of annoying inquiries about cuckolding and chastity. I thought it might useful to some of you readers to see that other couples use chastity to enhance the physical relationship and it has nothing to do with any of the internet kinks on the subject matter. Me and my girlfriend are in a mixed orientation relationship. She’s lesbian and I am not. So since I’m the wrong gender, intercourse isn’t really happening. We have ways to connect physically, like foot worship or full body massage. To help with area of the no sex, we decided to use the device that kind of goes along with that. I like to make sure her pleasure comes first so I don’t masturbate until she has had an orgasm. Sometimes it’s easier to do when I’m actually not in chastity. Because not releasing for a while then putting on the chastity kind makes me think of it more often. Which can be what she might want. So she likes that I give her that control over me in such a private matter. I’ve also discovered the pleasure of orgasm in the chastity with a powerful vibrator. We were talking about which vibrators each of us like. She laughed and said I am kind of like dating girl in the since we talk which vibrator I prefer. She is a very attractive woman and will wear some clothes to always remind me of that. So chastity works as a median to bridge that gap in that area of our relationship where there would otherwise be a void. I’ve never seen any kinks dealing with our specific situation, but the tease and denial does keep me very attentive and loving. Here’s too long foot worshiping sessions in chastity. Bless the woman who are willing to partake in our chastity lifestyle.

I'm not even going to pretend to understand how you got together but I'm glad that you're both making it work for the both of you. Thank you for for the support.

#chastity question

[officialgleamstar]

Personal DnDads Pride Headcanons

some of these are simple but most are paragraphs long because of who I am as a person (incapable of saying things concisely), so they're going under a readmore. vaguely organized by age group.

one quick note: feel free to cheer on or rag on any of these that you please, variety in opinion is the spice of fandom life! everyone's headcanons are so real and valid to me, i am a strong believer in having as many contradicting fandom opinions as you want. for this list, i just went with everything that is "default" to my fan content. others' transfem sparrow is shaking hands with my gnc sparrow and yes, i'm listing that one on purpose, because if you make fun of transfem sparrow, you are getting hit by my bat. be fucking nice.

please enjoy!

Season 1 Dads and Spouses

Carol is a lesbian. This is simply canon to me. It’s important that this is first and visible to everyone.

Bi/pan polyamorous Henry and Mercedes is also simply canon to me. Honestly that one might be fully canon based on some of the things that happen in Odyssey

Henry is unlabeled but in the sense that he calls himself ‘queer’, ‘bisexual’, ‘gay’, or ‘pansexual’, fully depending on his mood and the conversation happening

Ron is also unlabeled but in the sense that he has never thought about it in his life and isn’t intending to now

Glenn is bisexual but never talks about it unless someone else mentions it first, and he tries really really hard to never think about his gender once in his life. The queer angst I give Glenn could be a whole post of its own but just know he has issues. He does fuck men though

Darryl still isn’t really sure on his sexuality and probably never will be, but he’s actually explored it a bit, so that’s better than whatever the fuck was going on with him before the show started. Henry likes giving him subtle bear pride flag accessories because Darryl actually wears them a lot. His favorite color is brown, after all.

Jodie, Nicky, and Taylor all are bisexual with a preference for women. Sexuality isn’t genetic but it is for them specifically.

Morgan is also bisexual. Literally none of the season 1 parents are straight except maybe Samantha and even with her, my opinion fully matters on the day and how I’m feeling.

Henry and Lark have definitely had an exchange at some point where Lark asked him how it was to ‘experience twink death’, to which Henry just went ‘get back to me in a few years on that, kid.’ and Lark spent the rest of the week furiously moping because clearly, he’s a twunk, Father- (words of a man who did not take care of himself well enough from the ages of 18-25 to ever be a twunk)

This is my little shipper brain but Jodie only realized he liked men after being stuffed into the Odyssey and being around Ron 24/7 for months on end (and the demon stuff, but he didn’t know that yet for obvious reasons). In his timeline, he had a whole arc about it and now he’s persistently attracted to strange men who don’t make sense as well as women light-years out of his league. He’s still a little miffed that Henry doesn’t remember the very long conversations they had about it, but him and Nicky get to wear matching bi pride bracelets now, so he guesses it’s fine.

Kiddads and Spouses

Lark is bisexual. He has known this since kindergarten when his parents explained what the flag all over their house was and has never thought about it since.

Lark also helped Rebecca realize she was bisexual because she would ask him about it in a class they shared in high school

This is utterly unrelated to LGBT headcanons but I think Veronica and Rebecca grew up in San Dimas with the kiddads, and were friends with them in high school. It just makes sense to me

Unlabeled Terry Junior is something that can be so personal to me. In a general sense, he likes everyone romantically, and identifies enough with the asexual spectrum to wear an ace ring, but he doesn’t really see the point in putting a name on it. He’s just Terry Junior and he’s happy with that.

Him, Lark, and Nicky did have a group chat called ‘bisexuals with an agenda’ in high school though, where they would make plans for pranking or otherwise harassing their fathers during group outings. Terry loves Ron but that does not mean he is above ruining his day. It’s done with affection.

My thoughts on Sparrow could be a full fanfiction but gonna try to keep it simple (retroactive edit: did not keep it simple). Sparrow is the token cishet of the kiddads, but in the queerest way possible. He’s an Oak-Garcia, of course he’s explored himself very thoroughly. At current, he identifies as gender non-confirming cis man, but he has had periods of his life where he transitioned and then detransitioned. In early high school, he identified as non-binary. From senior year up until just before Hero was born, he lived as a trans lesbian. He doesn’t see these periods as phases, just as his identity changing over time. Currently he’s perfectly happy identifying as a man, but wouldn’t be wholly shocked if he transitioned again. Calls himself “cis but gender is obviously, massively, a social construct and so it feels unfair to expect myself to fit into these boxes when identity can be so fluid and-”

Rebecca still calls him her wife, and also a granola lesbian or MILF from time to time because it makes him laugh, and while Nicky was still in his life, he would send Sparrow trans memes a lot. Sparrow also has always liked being seen as non-binary, he sees it as ‘winning at being androgynous’. Competitive to the sense of nonsensical Sparrow my beloved

Sparrow always wears women’s clothing but that’s for autistic reasons. They just fit nicer for his brain. It helps the gender(tm) thing though, he near exclusively wore hand-me-downs from Mercedes throughout all of high school

Sorry for talking so much about Sparrow. He’s my favorite character so he is the focus of many of my thoughts. Anyways

Never been a huge fan of the ‘Grant was outed by his crush in the Forgotten Realms’ headcanon, I think Grant came out about a year beforehand. Long enough where everything about it has settled but it’s still new enough that Darryl forgot for a split second and thought Grant might have a crush on Killa during the Four Knight arc. He’d known he liked boys a while before that, and also his parents kind of figured he was gay most of his life since he had 95% girl friends

Marco is pansexual! He met Grant in college because he worked the front desk of their dorm building and would always wear a bunch of pride pins

Nicky was Grant’s first good friend who was a boy, I like to think that they were childhood friends. Grant announced this to his dad at the age of 10 by going “Nick Close is transgender now, so that means you don’t have to worry about me only talking to girls because he’s a boy.” and Darryl went “…Alright?” and then googled what ‘transgender’ means

Speaking of, Nicky realized he was trans because of Mulan. Both Glenn and Jodie, in their respective timelines, googled ‘How do I know if my daughter is a lesbian’ before he came out because Nicky would rewatch the reflection song so often and also the tomboy-isms. Everyone felt very stupid for being surprised when he cut all of his hair off, cried, and asked to change his name

T4T Nicky and Cassandra is canon and they rubbed it into everyone's faces when they were together, Anthony is just afraid of the truth

Cassandra is trans het. I love trans het people more than anything and I love her so this makes sense to me.

Veronica is non-binary, in the sense of “girl but to the left”. They/she pronouns, calls themself a girlie and a mom but not a woman, dresses in a kickass pantsuit at formal events. I’m also in love with her

Season 2 Teens and Friends

Hero and Normal are both trans. When Hero came out, Sparrow sat Normal down to explain why Hero was now a sister instead of a brother and Normal responded with “Well, that’s not fair. How come Hero can be a girl but I can’t be a boy?!” and Sparrow just stared at him for a really long time before going “You can be a boy, honey.” and they went thrift shopping as a family for new clothes the next day

Normal is stealth trans, mostly because Hero is the same way and he copies her, but also because it doesn’t really occur to him that he passes. He just figures that people knows even though he is on testosterone and binds and presents masculine. It helps that his family presents pretty gender-neutral as a whole, so most people assume he had long hair as a kid because his parents are hippies. They had a son and daughter, both with long hair. They now have a daughter and a son, both with short hair. To the general populace, nothing has changed, they just misremembered which kid was older.

Taylor is a demi-boy and spends every year growing more and more feminine. Definitely calls their gender something like ‘boy with a dash of girl on the side’ with their friends. Growing out his hair was a newer thing and he regrets cutting it, even if it was a super cool sequence and he looked like an anime protagonist, because he liked how it framed his face.

Cassandra has always maintained an openness about her trans identity, so Taylor’s the same way. He’s always got the he/they pronoun pin on (I figure this is normalized by the time of season 2, but he’s just very pleased about it), he has a variety of trans and non-binary pride pins that he cycles through, and they like painting their nails because it’s an easy way for them to feel a little more feminine.

Cassandra’s living room is decorated with a massive trans pride flag and LED lights. The first time the teens walk into Taylor’s home, Scary says “it looks like a Twitch stream in here” at the same time that Normal says “it looks like my sister’s room in here” and they high-five while Taylor yells at them to be nice.

Hermie is genderfluid and uses any pronouns. This is real to me. He has my own teenage trait of gender shifting every three hours and never knowing what to do about it and he will be suffering with this until he exits puberty, at which point he gives up and just sees what gender other people choose for him.

Hermie is also pan/ace! No further thoughts here. She just is.

Erica just goes by queer because she doesn’t think the common passerby deserves to know her rich inner life and she’s right, they don’t

I tend to say a lot that all of the S2 kids are bisexual, and I represent them as such, but I truly believe that Lincoln and Normal both have no idea what’s going on with their sexualities. They say they’re bisexual for bisexual teen squad reasons but Normal is going through a constant crisis of “Am I gay or bisexual?” and Lincoln looks up the definition of aro/ace on a weekly basis. Neither of them will ever express this until Scary goes “maybe I’m not bisexual, actually.”

On that note, Scary is a lesbian but she’s not going to realize that until college. For now, she’s rocking with the bisexuality and pretends it’s not weird that her ‘crushes’ on boys feel wildly different than her crushes on girls. Yes I am projecting. This is not a secret. We project onto Scary here.

#mine #dndads #dungeons and daddies #happy pride! #im just gonna drop this and go shower. sorry it is so fucking long LMAO

[physalian]

The Ace Character Guide

I am firmly in the “you don’t need to be part of X minority to write characters in X minority” camp. If we didn’t celebrate people learning, researching, and trying, we’d keep these dividers up. Now if your plan is to write a character explicitly suffering the nuanced and painful circumstances of why they’re a minority maybe don’t do that if you don’t personally have that experience?

Anyway! I want more aces in fiction. Thus, non-aces should get comfortable writing us, cause we’re really not that scary, and there’s a ton of variety within the ace spectrum. I’m including demisexuals in here, but not aromantics because I am not any authority on aromanticism. As seen in the graph above, your ace, or aces, can be wildly different than whatever stereotype you have in your head.

You can be an ace romantic, you can be ace and any other sexuality or gender identity, you can be poly and ace. There is no limit.

So I spent way too long on the above graph that should include gender identity on it but that would require three axes and I want to keep this simple, so for today's purposes "orientation" includes gender identity. Here's five ace characters you could potentially write:

Character A: This character's aceness is neutral, as is their sexuality, since they don't desire anyone regardless of what's in their pants. They might have it from time to time, but will let the opportunity arise and the planets align to feel in the mood for it.

Character B: This character could be gay, bi, pan, lesbian, etc, and are more on the sex-positive side and leaning toward demi. They'll do it, maybe seek it out, but likely not with a stranger and not very often. They might only do it with their partner or someone they trust.

Character C: This character is, for all other intents and purposes, straight and cis. They might have a long-term partner, they might not, but they'll do it when the inclination arises, just probably won't have a hook-up or a one-night-stand with a stranger.

Character D: This character is also, for all other intents and purposes, straight and cis, but they want little to do with sex. Doesn't matter if they're in a romantic relationship. They don't seek it out and might actively avoid situations where they'd be pressured to participate.

Character E: This character is LGBTQ+ of some variety, but still not a fan of sex. They do not need a reason to justify their gayness because straight isn't the default. They might be in a monogomous or polyamourous relationship and in it for the cuddles and attention.

What does all that mean? It means I can write a gay male character who isn’t going to seek out someone to sleep with but might dabble if he’s in the mood and someone approaches him first, and still call him ace. I can also write a straight, cis-woman who wants absolutely nothing to do with it or any of its byproducts, and call her ace.

Asexuality isn’t necessarily a lack of libido, it’s a lack of attraction to other people. Aces aren’t all prude, clueless virgins, our sexuality is self-contained. Or, sometimes, it really is the lack of drive for any and all thoughts and sensations toward sex.

It’s a spectrum. A very wide and inclusive spectrum, which means there’s a lot of room to play around and not very many no-no’s (at least in my opinion). You can still write your aces in sex scenes. You can still write them finding other characters attractive. You can still write them wanting sex at all.

The no-no’s:

Every ace ever has heard “you just haven’t found the right person yet”. If you write an ace and their arc is *curing themselves* you’re completely missing the point

Thus, writing your ace realizing they’re *cured* after some amazing fanfic-level sexy times is also in bad form.

Writing an ace who’s ’I hate being ace it’s misery’ all the time. It’s not miserable. The only thing miserable about it is how we aren’t taken seriously by society.

An ace with a non-ace partner who justifies their partner cheating because they see themselves as “not good enough” or their relationship insufficient. This happens, and this is for ace authors only imo.

Ace who suddenly isn’t because of alcohol, medication, or drugs now *free* from their “disorder”

Ace = autistic/[insert mental disorder]. Yes, sometimes it can overlap, when you have people with sensory issues that includes a dislike for sex, but ace ≠ mental disorder in any way shape or form. If you’re going to write this, you’d better have that neurodivergence yourself or are super close with someone who does.

An ace who is only ace because of trauma, in a book that says asexuality is only possible through trauma and not just a thing that people feel

An ace who thinks they're an incel because they don't think anyone will love them without putting out, and the book's plot proves them right.

—

Why does this matter? Why do we want to see representation so badly? Two reasons, I think it can be boiled down to:

Sex ≠ Love. Intimacy doesn’t mean attraction.

Sex ≠ the only motivation a character can have.

Part of the reason I hated Disney’s Loki was because he spent a decade of real-world time being motivated by power, vengeance, redemption, fear, hate, respect, and insecurity. Loki never needed a romantic subplot to fulfill his arc and the one they gave him was garbage.

I support the drifting away from the obligatory romantic subplot, too (for all my aros out there) however, what’s even rarer is a romantic subplot that doesn’t include lust. A romance that is all about the emotional, personal connection, not just physical.

But it’s also about this dire need we have to unlearn that any attempt at physical intimacy at any level certainly means that sex is the endgame, particularly for men. Please write more characters that hug and cuddle on the couch to watch a movie and casually touch each other and even share a bed *without* it leading anywhere. Characters who hold hands just because. Who give cheek/nose/forehead kisses just for fun, or for love. Characters who don’t flip out when their crush takes their shirt off. Characters who can (or even prefer not to) see each other naked without libido getting in the way.

Now then.

What if you do want to write your ace pursuing or getting sex? (Or, fandom forbid, taking a canonical ace and writing them in a relationship and/or getting intimate). Aces can still want sex. But if you’re writing an ace solely to write them in a sex scene, why are you writing an ace?

If that’s only part of their character and not their primary motivation or arc, here’s some suggestions:

An ace who is curious about sex and wants to try it with someone they trust

An ace curious about sex so they hire a sex worker so there’s no perforamce pressure or emotional risk

An ace who will take the opportunity if it arises, but won’t go out looking for it

An ace determined to please their non-ace partner within the realm of their comfort zone (tread lightly here)

An ace who still (annoyingly or otherwise) dreams and fantasizes about other characters, and deals with that alone

An ace who doesn’t like anything done to them, but can get creative with their partner, or vice versa

An ace who does like some things but not all things related to sex. E.g. an ace that likes kissing but doesn’t want to go further than that.

An ace in a healthy and communicative relationship with another ace or a non-ace and there are zero worries of infidelity or the non-ace person leaving them

An ace who says no at any point and their partner listens and they go have fun doing anything else

I didn’t address Demis much but I think many of the same guidelines apply? Demis just have that one special person. But, see? We’re not scary.

I also don’t support the “minority representation must never be painted in a bad light/be the villain/be at all a jerk of a character because reasons”. If you want to make your villain ace, you have my permission. ***however*** Don’t make their aceness the root of their villainy, and don’t make them insult or degrade other characters for not being ace. Also, try to have at least one other ace in the cast, preferably on the hero side.

When in doubt, consult a sensitivity reader. I’m happy to oblige, because I very badly want my own army of fictional aces to fall in love with and they aren’t going to write themselves.

#acespec #ace pride #ace characters #writing advice #writing resources #writing tips #writing a book #writing tools #character development #writing

[dinosaursatemymom]

imogen should be unlabeled sapphic imo

It would be great rep plus it could help the show open conversations about how labels shouldn't be forced onto people.

By unlabeled sapphic I mean she should just be like, "I just like people, but I don't think any label really fits me, I just know I like girls" and tbh it seems like once she fully realizes she's into girls she's gonna only date them for a bit hence, "everything would just be easier if I were into girls" so when people ask her about her sexuality she can just be like, "I'm sapphic but I don't want a specific label"

Also a large amount of people in the community tend to force labels onto people and get pissed off when people don't use/do use certain labels, in my experience at least, and I think it would be cool to portray that as it is an issue within the community. I'm not saying the show should villianize any of the main characters, I'm saying that the show should show that even if someone is a part of the community or well meaning they can still mess up and make ignorant comments.

I think a interesting scenario would be if Imogen is talking to one of the kids in the group (likely nick, but maybe Tara or Darcy) about how she thinks shes sapphic and the person she's talking to, like, gives her a label or says something like, "oh well, you're bi then?" Or along those lines. Leaving Imogen upset and dejected because she feels like no labels fit her but everytime she tries to talk to someone about it they always give her a label that she still feels doesn't fit. And she just ends up not wanting to come out because she feels pressured to pick a label and feels like since none of the labels have fit she thinks she's straight (lmao totally not me projecting lol). Also if she does end up dating sahar, which it seems like they're going to, she could try and talk to Sahar about how she feels like none of the labels really fit her. And Sahar is going through all the labels trying to help Imogen, and Imogen is just like, "no, not that one" the entire time. Which could lead to Sahar being upset and thinking that Imogen isn't actually queer and just using her to figure out her sexuality/as an experiment. They fight, Imogen and Sahar both do a bunch of research, Imogen decides that she doesn't want a label and that she likes girls and she doesn't need a label to define her. Whilst Sahar realize that she needs to give Imogen some time, they both apologize and start dating.

Also if they tell the group that they're dating it should go smthn like this :

Imogen or Sahar : we're dating!!

Everybody : yayyyy coolll

Someone : so, Imogen are you a lesbian?

Imogen : nope

Someone else : bisexual then?

Imogen : no. I'm not anything, I'm just me

Somebody : but, like-

Imogen : well, I am sapphic, but i don't need a label, all that matters is that I like Sahar right now

Everyone : okah

A disgustingly adorable group hug commences

I just think this would be really cool and I def might be projecting a bit because I felt very forced into choosing a label by my lgbtqia+ peers. I also think it would be good because it could show viewers that just because someone doesn't have a label when they come out(or ever) doesn't mean they're any less valid.

Also sapphic is just such a pretty word it's just so✨🥰🌈😜😘🩷🤍🪻🤍🩷✨. It just feels so feminine and girly, it's so perfect for Imogen I just love it. I love Imogen sm. And the flagg the flag is so pretty, girls are pretty. I love women(that includes trans women too!!! I shouldn't even have to say this tbh, trans women are women) Imogen is pretty.

The issue with this is that ik the viewers would still have hc for her sexuality even if she gets confirmed unlabeled, and say shit like, "well unlabeled isn't her reallll sexuality, she obviously has to be someeethinggg". Which would go against the exact point of the storyline.

Ik this probably isn't what they're gonna do with the storyline but it would be super cool if they did.

#unlabeled sexuality #queer #lgbtqiia+ #lgbtqia #lgbtq #lgbtq community #lgbtqplus #heartstopper #imogen heartstopper #imogen x sahar #imogen heaney #sapphic

[amusingmusie]

Hello! I'm a big fan of your work "Yours Truly" on Ao3 & your character Penelope, probably like the rest of us here!

So, as we all know, Alastor is someone who is on the asexual spectrum– a real shocker, I know! [/s] But there's a question that's been bugging me for a while, and that is 'what sexuality is Nel'? Because I SWEAR on my life I saw a post saying that she is bisexual, but I cannot seem to find it– so I don't know if that's a fragment of my imagination, and I have entirely made that up... Or that's an actual thing that has been stated and I simply forgot lmao!

I hope that isn't something weird to ask! And, if I really DID make that up, then I'm sorry for bothering you with all those questions!

BUT ALSO, just in case my mind isn't actually playing tricks on me- would you say that Nel is 'aware' of her attraction to women? That she recognizes it as the same attraction she feels towards men, as we see with Alastor– or does she pay it no mind? Not in a "actively ignoring it" way, just a "I've never really thought about it for various reasons"– because we do see Nel being quite open minded in your work, like when she confronts Alastor about the altar for his ancestors without any real judgement! She seems very tolerant and willing to learn about the 'unknown'! Did she have a very sudden realization that 'oh shit, (unspecified lady) is HOT what the hell-", or did her attraction manifest in more subtle ways throughout her life? Obviously, I doubt she would ever put a label on her feelings, simply because of the realities of the times in which "Yours Truly" takes place– similarly to how Alastor (even in Hell) isn't aware of the more 'modern' labels for his sexual attraction, or rather the lack of it!

All in all, Nel is an amazing character, no matter her sexuality– you really made her feel like a real person! She doesn't feel shallow or flat like some characters in fanfiction often do– she has both positive and negative aspects of her character, which make her interactions with the people around her all the more entertaining to read! Especially with Alastor– but I must say, I am also a big fan of her relationship with Grace! I am a sucker for siblings that genuinely care & love each other, but who also can be jokingly mean, and well... Act like real siblings would! I find that most fanfictions follow either the "siblings who absolutely despise each (especially if they are both women, for some reason)" trope, or the "siblings who are sickeningly sweet with one another".

I see that I have written quite a long wall of text– I hope I didn't completely bore you out of your mind! Have a nice day/night, and remember to prioritize your health & mental wellbeing! Toodles! <33

I rub my hands together like a grubby little fly.

You didn't make it up! Nel is technically bisexual (and on the aro/ace spectrum). It's not something I've explicitly written in my fic since she's not even aware of it- that lady grew up in the backwoods in the early 19th century USA. Not saying she couldn't figure it out, she just really doesn't think about it? Like you said, Al is like "huh" when his sexuality is labeled, so is she lol. Eventually she might kinda blink and go "oooooooh" but I don't think it's a big spoiler to say she found her person with Alastor, so while it's an important discovery that's part of her identity, she's happily unhappy with that fucker.

But that's not to say she's unaware of the LGBTQ community or that she's discriminatory towards them! Part of her defining personality is that she is very accepting and if Grace came home with a girl she would not bat an eye. Bonus points if the girl can't get her pregnant lmao. Nel thinks a win is a win.

All in all, I'm a lesbian, and the majority of my OCs have a little sugar in their tanks whether they realize it or not (even if they're unhappily/happily stuck with a stinky deer man) <3

Also, I'm glad you like Grace! I know sibling characters can be hit or miss, but she's integral to the story so I couldn't get rid of her.

Thanks for the cool ask :)

#my asks #hey tag readers fun fact! #grace and I share a middle name #lmao only like 2 people know that #now you do too

[mybg3notebook]

I know you have not uploaded in several years and might not even see this, but I wanted to say thank you SO much for your amazing explorations of Gale. He is a very complex and often misunderstood character and I think your meta posts on him hit the mark perfectly. If the spark arises I hope you will return after the full release :) Thank you again for all your wonderful posts! Have a nice day!

Hello!

Thank you very much. I am still around, it's simply work and other games have got my attention, and after playing EA so many times, I am already burnt out to the bones. I am also deeply disappointed with Larian's latest changes.

Hopefully, after release, I will continue with more analysis if the game is worthy of that. Unfortunately, I'm not sure how well these analysis of Gale will hold with the apparent rewrite of his character. If the new description of him ends up being true and it's not a terrible lie to the player, since nothing of that was shown or hinted in EA, these analysis will fall apart. In fact, if he ends up being another boring, overused, cliche wizard who wants power because he wants to be the biggest wizard of Toril :rolling eyes:.... I may lose any interest in him. All what made him interesting and a bit "original" within the context of Forgotten Realms has been erased completely with that new description.

I'm also disappointed with Larian in general, because it's obvious their two fave chars are forced through the player's throat like Liara was in Bioware's case. You don't care about them? It doesn't matter, they will always take priority in conversation and scenes, they will be key in showing another side of the main plot (as it was Fane in DOS2) and the rest of the companions become secondary or forgettable.

And Karlach's final face is a horror. It's a variation of Shadowheart's face, a barby-Karlach, because clearly Larian feeds bro gamers who want yet another doll-faced woman. I find annoying that nobody complained for this change: her first potential face (not the placeholder), with half face burnt and scarred, hard eyes, and a longer and pronounced nose, was the face of a warrior who went to hell and back... now you have the baby-doll face, Red!Shadowheart, almost, lol. It's a bit unsettling. It reminds me when Larian made their big-boobs lizard women in DOS1.

At least they did what I thought it was a must: to truly write Wyll, because that char was inconsistent, lacked of depth in comparison with the rest of the other companions, and was, basically, a future Beast (dos2) in BG3. That's why I didn't even bother to write a general overall analysis of his character. I suspected he had to be written at some point because it's was a cardboard character in there, just there to be your black char token. You know, the black char we add to a game so we look "progressive" but still has bad development as a char or it's simply shallow when compared with the depth of the other chars. Pretty much like Larian does with their lgbt representation too.

Larian's lgbt representation also bothers me. It is mostly hidden in books and lines of text in this world (yes, yes, Astarion is the only char shown and written lgbt openly, but the rest of the world has no lgbt integrated chars, or the few two couples we saw in EA are unhealthy and horrible-the gnome lesbian-or absolutely hidden in one single line that, if you miss it, you can confuse them as brothers -the husband gnomes-). We can have a long discussion about how Larian does playersexual characters that are not any representation of lgbt, because they are not written like bi but hetero, and their "bisexuality" only appears when you romance them (and this was done in DOS2 too, with barely a line or two hidden in Lohse's origin to show some potential, little bi inclination). It's so strong how they write their characters as hetero, that even in several parts of the romances of DOS2 you have descriptions where it shows that the default was clearly "man tall and woman smaller", even when in DOS2 world that may not apply to some hetero couples (elves and lizards). But all this discussion about playersexuality is a long one I'm not even sure the fandom can have at this point. I wish to be wrong and see more lgbt characters naturally integrated to the world, and not reduced to short stories in books or to whom you romance with your Tav. But I doubt it. Larian follows the masses. And Masses care nothing about this. Thank you for the ask, and have a nice day too!

#bg3 early access - answers

[r3dblccd]

TAG PEOPLE YOU'D LIKE TO KNOW BETTER!

tagged by: @irrwicht

tagging: @formorethananame, @luneblush, @temporalobjects, @weedzkiller, @r4bidog, @hishedonism, @mxldito, @ovilis, @vienrose, @unavernales, @dozenrozez, @frxgmcnts, @finalsurvivorgrp, @caelcstis, @dcrkfcngs

favorite color(s): Red, purple, but I like all colors

favorite flavor(s): I have a huge sweet tooth, so I'd say chocolate and also fruity flavors like bananas and strawberries.

favorite music: Honestly, I think I can say that I listen mostly everything. I've come to the conclusion that I don't really care about the genre, if I like a song, I like it and that's about it. And that's why my playlist is a mess, especially when I put it on shuffle lmao

favorite movie(s): It's so hard to pick, there are so many good ones! But I recently watched Tokyo Godfathers, that one automatically jumped in my top favourites. I also really liked Grave of Fireflies (even though it's quite a heavy movie), Spirited Away, Princess Mononoke, The Handmaiden (let's go lesbians, let's go), Perfect Blue, Everything Everywhere All At Once, The Jigsaw franchise (and honestly, I think the 10th movie might be my favourite), The Fear Street Trilogy, Coraline, What We Do In The Shadows, Train To Busan

Honorable mentions: I think Gremlins is starting to grow on me, especially the second movie because I love that the production team didn't take it all too seriously, I do like when some movies are self-aware how silly they actually are. Also shoutout to The Sadness. Am I ever going to watch that movie ever again? Probably not, it was a very disturbing movie. But this is not your usual zombie movie, if I can even call it a zombie movie, which surprised me? Like, it definitely does have those elements of the apocalyptic zombie genre but turned it completely over its head by making the infected actually aware of the things they're doing but not being able to stop it. Again, it is a disturbing movie, it's not for everybody. I personally don't see myself watching it twice. Plus, finding out that the director has said something like that he wanted to focus more on the "fun and the gore" other than anything else in a Q&A did sound quite sussy to me given the heavy topics and the ways the movie could be interpreted. Idk, as philology and literature major it just keeps getting confirmed to me that most, if not all works of art, no matter in what form, have something to say and they deeply reflect the time in which they were created, and there's always the subjectivity of the viewer who interprets it in their own way (like hell, even the superheroes in movies these days most likely take a whole lot of inspiration from Greek mythology, if you really think about it). Some people have mentioned that the director might have answered the way that he did as to not stir up controversy since it was at a festival, but I can't say for sure, I wasn't there to see the interview myself and this is already getting really long so I will stop now, you can make your own conclusions.

favorite series: Courage the cowardly dog, The Scooby-Doo franchise, Are You Afraid Of The Dark (I'm talking about the 90's series, I haven't watched the 2019 revival). Do I remember anything from them? Kind of, it's been a very long time since I've watched them. I kind of want to rewatch them because of it. But they sparked my interest in all things spooky when I was a kid so I feel like they deserve a place here. Some of my other favourites include: The Untamed, Serial Experiments Lain, Steins;Gate, Semantic Error, Another, My Roommate is a Detective, Wellington Paranormal, What We Do In The Shadows, Hellbound and Sweet Home (I do recommend reading the webtoons of those two, though), Death Parade, The Silent Sea, Color Rush, Squid Game, My Beautiful Man, Good Omens, Our Flag Means Death, Alice on Borderland, My Name, Yellowjackets, Theatre of Darkness: Yamishibai

last song: Ruler Of My Heart by BL8M & Rubyeye & Unknown (Till The End) by AKUGETSU (Alien Stage OSTs) (tw for blood and a bit of gory imagery in the MVs for anyone who wants to check them out). Also can I also just talk about the 1st Anniversary Remixes of those two songs too!!! (here and here, audio only). Just *cheff's kiss*, I love those songs so much, I want to eat them. The story all these animations is quite interesting, the animations themselves are very well done too. How can I describe it. The story kind of takes that deadly game trope (like, let's say in the Hunger Games and Alice in Borderland), but make it about people being forced to be in a singing competition against each other to survive and they are being judged by aliens. From what I know, I could be wrong, the main way of storytelling is through the MVs on the VIVINOS YT channel so it does require a bit to analyze (there is a bit of a additional info on the official website and on the wiki, I'm sure), so if any of that sound interest you, I would recommend checking it out

last series: Choco Milk Shake

last movie: The Cat Returns

currently reading: So Long, And Thank for All The Fish from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy books. I'm so happy of how much progress I've done on reading those books compiled in one huge book, I'm halfway through the series now. And honestly I want to read it for as long as I can because I really enjoy it, it's so fun, I love the absurd situation the main characters fall into while the big question of the meaning of life, the Universe and everything looms over them. This would definitely go in one of my top books I've read I'm sure.

And I also have to mention the webtoons that I'm reading because I love them very much too: Hand Jumper, The Blind Prince, Lore Olympus, Zombie X Slasher (I don't know in what kind of direction this one would go, but so far so good!), Everything is Fine, Flawed Almighty, Homesick (I love love LOVE this one! The art style and everything is great), Never Ending Darling (I know that it's gonna end in like 2 days officially once the last episode is available to read for free, but damn, what a ride this was. The concept of this webtoon is terrifying), Omniscient Reader, My S-Class Hunters, ZOMGAN (also quite an interesting and honestly refreshing way of making a story about zombies), Nocturne and The Guy Upstairs

And special highlight to: There Are No Demons. This webtoon? An absolute nightmare fuel. I find it very interesting that the artist Nemo Nullus makes 3D models first and then draws over them. I wasn't so sure how to feel like it when I first saw it, this was the first time I've seen anything like it on webtoon, but I quickly grew to like this art style, the kind of weird realism and uncanny valley really add to the stories. And the stories themselves are very scary because these are things that could actually happen, and have most likely happened in real life too, especially that first story with the stalker. This webtoon has made me feel things no other horror/thriller webtoon has made me feel, I feel like I want to crawl out of my own body when I'm reading it, really.

currently watching: Nothing in particular, just random YT videos. I do have some shows to catch up on that I already mentioned here.

currently working on: Mostly focusing on studying a bit more for my exam on monday. But once I'm done I'll be back to doing more stuff here, hopefully ❤️

#long post cw #//this got long so i'm putting it under the cut #//thought that since I started to ramble as usual might as well give a long list of my favourites lol #//no i'm being serious this turned very long like jesus christ when and how did this get so long jhbgggbfh #//so feel free to skip this #misc; ooc #misc; dash games

[cowboyjen68]

I think I'm mostly just venting about this but I also feel like you have some amazing sage wisdom just like you do for everyone.

My best friend of 10 years (highschool onward) and the last friend I have who is cis just dropped me out of nowhere. He claimed it was because I moved and we were "already growing apart" but I can't help but think it was my queerness.

I recently came out to friends and family as a lesbian (about 3 years ago) and came out to friends only as not cis around the same time. It was after this that he stopped talking to me as much and just generally treated me weird.

I've since moved away and we stayed friends until he dropped me out of the blue. I have no more long-term friends now. Nobody from my hometown talks to me after that as all of our mutual acquaintances dropped me too after he did.

I'm sure it's for the best in the end but I feel so lost not having a best friend, a person who knows who I am, around. Especially with how scared I feel to be in queer spaces with rising tensions, I guess I'm just feeling lost.

I am going to come at this from my experience. High school is such a time of growth and change, friendships from that time in our life can be hard to hold on to, especially with a connection as strong as you feel when you are growing up and experiencing things together in similar circumstances. 

Maintaining a friendship between young men and women can be incredibly different as they start to reach maturity since they receive different socialization and information from both the outside world and from the inside changes their bodies are experiencing as puberty does its job.  

It is possibly just a matter of you growing apart as humans and not necessarily due to some judgment of your sexuality on his part. He perhaps just feels less of an ability to connect with you as time has gone on and even because, as a straight man, he just doesn’t have as much in common with you. When we are younger those differences are less important but as we age and have more access to a wider variety of people those differences can be more pronounced. 

I have kept in FB contact with many high school friends and my best friend and I communicate once in a while but in all reality, we rarely see each other, our lives are very different and we don’t share the connection we once had. I will always call her “my best friend” because she was my first best friend and we shared so many life changing moments together. She will always be special to me. When I came out she accepted me and was not surprised because she knew me better than anyone. The fact is, time has made us less close. And that is okay. We had a wonderful childhood together and spent many years making memories. We haven't lost any of those even as our connection faded and we went in separate directions. 

Even IF your friend (friends) have walked away from you because you are a lesbian, maybe because they feel uncomfortable with you know, or maybe because they don’t know how to relate to you or just because life is moving on the end result is the same. 

You might never know and, frankly, it does not matter. It is pretty common for us to find new friends in each stage of life. HIgh school, college, career, middle age, marriage, retirement, or whatever place we are at. Sometimes we hang on to a few over a lifetime but even those friendships can ebb and flow with time. 

You will find new friends who share more in common with you. You will discover others who are a better fit in your life as you are right now. Let those old friendships organically fade and put your energy into finding new people who are worthy of your time and energy. Right now the change is scary and feeling alone is a terrifying feeling. Look for those who share your values and ideas. It is better to be on your own for a while than compromise who you are. 

I often suggest that we seek other lesbians to befriend because they share so much of the same experiences and foundations we have in our lives. Remember, not all lesbians are a good fit. Being a lesbian does not preclude people from being jerks or from being vastly different from you. Don’t discount a friend because she does not share your sexuality. Judge others on how you enjoy their friendship and how they enjoy yours. But seeking lesbian/bi women circles can be a good focus. When you know  2 lesbians they each know 2 more and on and on. You don’t need to go to larger mixed spaces like bars and pride events to meet each other. Look for local zines published by lesbians, FB spaces, meetup app or dating apps with “friendship” options can be a help. Try your library and see if they have lesbian book clubs and if not, start one. Be creative and keep searching.

#lesbian #bi women #community #friendship #old friends #new friends #feeling alone

[my-castles-crumbling]

hi! its incredible/intrusive tjoughts anon. honestly its nothing serious i just want advice lol.

so basically i identify as pan(tomantic) and non binary (transmasc).

basically i have this cousin who im REALLY close eith since shes the only family close to my age (we have a year differencs)

basically i do live in a very homophobic place, as i think ive said before but i think that she might be queer (bi specifically)

and here are my proofs:

1) the subtle one being, when its just the both if us watching something all she points out is how beautiful/amazing/gorgeous wtc the women look. nothing abt the guys. (not that im complaining cz women serious do slay)

i know that she also likes men because i remember watching this scene with her and one other cousin where the guy (wesrung a ehite) shirt fell into the water and was coming out (of the water).

me, personally, i was disgusted and i thiught my cousins would share the same opinions. nope. they rewatched the scene twice i think, their eyes were glued onto the screen ans they were both red.

2) the second one being, as ive mentioned before, i am a religious person qnd so is she. but we have this tradition where we go onto the roof and just talk about stuff we normally would never talk about. we basically kid of vent to each other too.

and there we've talked alot about queer people, and being a religious queer person and its clear that our views on the topic are very similar.

(i never bring up queer people bcz im scared of giving myself up, and usually people do not go around asking others abt their opinion on them. and yeah i feel like she was relieved when i explaijed that the last thing i wanted was for them to die)

niw into the veey obvious tells:

3) my cousin and i were bored so i took out markers and we decided to draw on my leg (dont ask me how we decided that that was the best thing to do.) but basically out if everything she couldve drawn, she drew the rainbkw but as a bi flag.

i saw it and when i pointed it out, she kind of looked panicked? so i just left it.

4) this one is like glaringly obvious tell. basically obv everyone knows, the tt algorithm works overtime and honestly i rarely get anything im not interested in.

so me, obv i have short hair, and when im sleeping/when im alone with other women you could easily tell that wtv is happening is not straight cis shit.

but basically i was changing so i just shed off my outer layer, underneath i was wearing this like sleeveless sweater and i had tracksuit bottoms underneath. my hair was oulled back in a half bun.

tell me why she says oh you look like thise masc lesbians in my tiktok fyp.

like FIRSTLY what are the masc lesbians doing on ur feed?? how have you watched them eniugh to know the specific terms??

basically idk if im maybe reading inti this but sometimes i genuinely feel like im going mad and i want to kind of come out ti someone irl cz i litr need someoen to see me, and recognize my efforts.

so. i just need advice, cz she knows quite alit if the terms as well, and ive noticed that homophobic people usually do not. (e.g. my brother does not know anthign other than gay and lesbian and queer cz he likes to throw them out as insukts)

but she does know, not all, but quite a few. (i only know nearky all cz for a while my obsession, idk what people call thus but basically i become obsessed with a tooic, research alot about it and then just leave it?. was like all the different types of labels and which umbrellas they fall under. so ive done alot of research on this matter which actually freaks alot of people out)

ive just realised i actually ramble alot so thankyou for making it this far lol

(also i just got hiccups wriitng this and theyre OISSING ME KFF)

Hi!

I feel like it's a pretty good assumption that your cousin is open-minded. I think it might be a good idea, next time you guys are having a rooftop conversation, to bring up queer people you know. Celebrities, mutual friends, etc. Ask her how she feels about those people. If she's cool with it, that's a good signal that you can come out.

Also think about- if you've told her other secrets, has she told other people? If not, then you can trust her with something like this.

As far as your cousin's sexuality- I'm not sure if you're reading into it. But remember, even if you come out to her, she might not return the gesture even if she IS queer. She might not be ready, and that's okay! Just continue to be a safe space for her no matter who she likes.

#ask #asks #ask cas #incredible anon

[menalez]

You don't have to answer this obviously, its embarrassing but I feel like I don't know where else to ask - NSFW

I've always found penetration difficult. I feel like I'm broken as a woman because it feels like everyone around me is able to do it and enjoys it and I don't. I don't want to be graphic but I don't know what to do. I'm scared to go to a doctor in case they diagnose me with vaginismus. I don't know if I should even try to make it better or just leave it. I feel like I can't experience my body fully because I cant do this one thing. I know thats stupid but its what I think in my head. I can't use tampons, and sexual penetration is terrible. I can use my hand, but I can't feel anything. It just doesn't feel pleasurable and I can't go in very far. If I use a dildo, it hurts. Not every second, I go slow etc but I can't get much in. It feels painful at the side of my labia. No matter what direction or position it just hurts. I can almost feel a bone blocking it or something. I feel like I'm broken and a freak and I don't know what to do. I cant talk to my friends because they all talk about how they love penetration and I feel too ashamed of my situation. I'm scared I'll never be able to satisfy a partner even though I'm a lesbian because I see women on here and tiktok talking about strapons etc and I know it would hurt and be impossible to have sex like that. Even when I relax and am definitely ready to try penetration, it doesn't work. No matter what I do it always feels uncomfortable in some way. If it doesn't hurt, it feels like nothing. I'm afraid I do have vaginismus or something is really wrong with me. I've never allowed a partner to try. I've not had a long term relationship and I worry women will be really put off if penetration is something I can't partake in. Ive not had loads of dating experience so idk if this is even a reasonable worry to have. im so sorry this is all over the place. I totally understand if you cant answer. Ive tried googling stuff but i cant really find much.

sorry for taking a while to respond. first of all i dont see whats embarrassing about this?! you have not said anything here that i think is embarrassing.

i don't particularly enjoy penetration and ive come across MANYYYYY women who don't. particularly many lesbians. its ok if you don't enjoy penetration. it doesn't have to mean you have vaginismus either, although what you described might be that (potentially on top of you already naturally not being keen on penetration). that said, there is no shame in being diagnosed with vaginismus either. receiving such a diagnosis can help you understand your body better and if you do think you could potentially enjoy penetration then maybe a diagnosis would help open that door for you somehow. it might also end up that you don't have vaginismus. either way, there is no must or need in enjoying penetration. there's probably even straight women who don't like it! just because there's many women who do, does not mean there's something wrong with you for not enjoying it.

i don't use tampons either! im 26 and first time i tried to, i was 24 and ever since then ive used it maybe a grand total of 2-3 times? it feels uncomfortable and painful for me too. its ok, many women do not use tampons so you're really not missing out there. it isn't a requirement in female adulthood.

also penetration alone does not feel pleasureable to an even larger group of women! so once again, there is nothing abnormal about not feeling much when trying it on yourself and its not abnormal to not find it pleasurable. and i don't know how experienced you are sexually, but the other stuff you mentioned could also be because you're dealing with shame & fear & aren't aroused enough while trying penetration on yourself. and if your friends were to judge you for not enjoying penetration, then frankly they're the ones that are weird, not you!

and from my experience at least, women have not been put off by me saying i don't like certain things (like penetration) and prefer other acts. if you're not sexually compatible with a woman then that is fine, but no one can expect you to enjoy a particular sex act and then judge you when you don't.

i think before worrying yourself this much, you should first find a woman you are comfortable with and attracted to. you could tell her about your fears & insecurities before having sex-- it can help if you're going to engage with her sexually bc it takes off anxiety from you while also making her aware of how she should be mindful & gentle! if you end up trying things with penetration with her and it becomes clear to you that you simply do not like it or like it with certain limits & restrictions or love it or whatever else-- all of that is normal. but don't worry yourself this much over something so small & a normal preference like not liking penetration, its really not abnormal to not enjoy it. if you're sexually inexperienced and have barely even dated then i get why you're worrying yourself so much but i promise when you're sexually active then normal people do not care about that the way you might think they do. penetration isnt for everyone, it doesn't have to be something you want or enjoy either

[vole-mon-amour]

7x17.

I love how Spencer doesn't give a single fuck about people and the way they see him. The way he sat at the trial after Emily returned. Now this. You you, wonderful boy.

"This is your final lesson, Julie. Do not mess with the teacher." Oh, this one was fun! The kid that played a sixteen year old didn't look like one, of course, but an interesting story overall. The teacher was so delusional. Medieval times and marrying at 12 years old. Sure, Jan.

I gotta give it to the actor, though. He's so awkward with her. The dynamic portrayed here is exactly how it should be portrayed. The actress is good, too.

I love it when the cases they show get me actually invested. Definitely much more interesting than Kevin/Penelope/Derek drama. (yikes)

That's very hot of Aaron.

So what you're saying is that JJ should've been a lesbian and live with Emily. God it.

Family, family, family. I want to see them hanging out together. I mean, really, Dave, Spencer, and JJ? It's like a dad with his kid and his friend, which, ultimately, means dad with his kids.

They're hilarious but also so sweet. Sometimes they give off totally platonic best friends vibes, just like this. They're so comfortable with each other.

I was about to say that maybe that's their difference & that's why they are platonic and maybe should go separate ways. I don't see Penelope becoming a full time mom. A fun aunt, maybe.

However, what if Derek was that person that could change her understanding of marriage? I mean, let's say he could've proposed (they're such an interesting couple that she could've beaten him to it with "I would never, ever want to marry, but it's different with you.") They're soulmates & let's say they'd marry & nothing would've changed. And she suddenly realizes that "Wow, that's how it should be."

Because I don't see Derek proposing to her the same way Kevin does: out of nowhere. Derek would make sure they are on the same page about this. He wouldn't want to freak Penelope out. He would never push her into something she doesn't want. I can imagine a situation where he proposes to her, she's not ready, and he goes, "Baby, it's okay. We don't have to marry if you're not ready." But at the same time he knows her so well that I think he'd see the right moment to do it?

Him wanting a kid is a different thing, but I can imagine him living without it (maybe getting a pet with Penelope or spending more time with Jack and Henry). Or maybe Penelope realizing that maybe it's not such a bad idea & then the idea of being a mother growing on her. Though I am, too, child-free & I understand that if your mind is settled on something, no matter how much you love a person, you should stay true to yourself. And I'm not sure exactly whether Penelope is more scared to end up alone or she genuinely doesn't want to be a mom. She was pretty warm toward Henry so maybe she actually would become a mom if she felt that kind of stability with Derek & was sure of it. Idk, many thoughts about that.

Either way, I can imagine them working out as a romantic couple (since they are often behave like one).

I mean, c'mon. This might as well be a conversation from Grey's Anatomy of two dating people.

Yeah. I think Derek would've understood that before proposing to her. Kevin's role in this show is very unclear. He pops up so rarely, there was a period in the show where he was completely absent. Now they kind of brought him back & he proposed? Meh.

I'm very curious about what he did that the fandom hates him.

Jerk move, especially since it shows that he doesn't love her & just wants to get married, no matter to whom. Still not worth hating though. He's whatever. Next, please. Or back to Derek, I'm not that picky.

At the same time, though, I think the entire Kevin plot line shouldn't have existed. It wouldn't change anything, but less money to spend on the cast, just like the channel wanted to.

#aaron hotchner #spencer reid #cm #natiswatching #jemily #david rossi #jennifer jareau #morcia

[dandelion-wings]

kaeya and jean as VERY belated submissions to the ask meme?

I feel like we have discussed all of this in depth (and I did write a whole fic about my gender vibe for them), but I suppose that is how you know I have opinions! XD Under a cut because this got long.

Kaeya:

Sexuality Headcanon: Bi/pan, as a very strong feeling rather than as default, and while I'll still write him romance if the narrative calls for it, you have definitely made aromantic Kaeya my dominant headcanon for him. And very much a sadomasochist, which feels as relevant to his sexuality as all the rest to me.

Gender Headcanon: COMPLICATED. As you well know I enjoy going in all sorts of directions for him on this as fits/is fun within the particular narrative, but my dominant headcanon for him is that his relationship with his gender is a lot like his relationship with his loyalties--what he is performing does not necessarily match what's going on deep down, and he does not want to examine it too closely and have to deal with revelations that might go against the expectations on him and what he's resolved to live with. And, like his loyalties, I enjoy being able to decide the details of that as an individual story/setting/timeline allows!

...So I guess somewhere between "variable" and "but also, genderfluid itself works in a lot of cases"?

A ship I have with said character: AND A BROTP I have with said character: Jean and Rosaria, because while they have very different individual vibes with him, they both share the privilege of me absolutely adoring him with both of them in ANY permutation. I write him with Jean more because, well, it's Jean, but they share that particular privilege for me and so I won't try to divide these two questions up between them.

A NOTP I have with said character: I... don't really have one? I don't really feel Childe/Kaeya or Kaeya/Albedo very much, but I get where the people who do are coming from and I don't dislike them, I'm just not going to seek them out. I think pretty much all his popular pairings I'm cool with.

A random headcanon: Aside from his canonical spying on the Treasure Hoarders, I tend to headcanon that the reason we don't see them much in Mondstadt except for Dragonspine and Old Monstadt, when in Liyue and Inazuma they're implied to be much more of a danger to travelers, is that Kaeya has a complex system of deals and threats and extortion going on that comes out to, they're allowed to hunt for treasure in areas where people aren't, but they don't get to harass merchants and travelers.

General Opinion over said character: I think he's fascinating and very fun! And he has a lot of range. :> Still probably my second-favorite in the game, or one of my second-favorites, since the exact depth of my passions for various characters does shift from day to day.

Jean:

Sexuality Headcanon: Definitely sapphic, and my dominant headcanon is “bi, leaning towards women,” though “lesbian so determined to carry out her dynastic expectations that she tries to convince herself she’s bi” is a perpetually fun variant.

Gender Headcanon: I had a very long essay here citing her clothing descriptions and everything, and then the post editor crashed and I’d saved the draft just before I started on Jean, so I am NOT going to retype it and am just going to summarize with: cis female, walking a very careful line between feminine and butch because she genuinely can’t untangle her own feelings from the expectations she lives with.

A ship I have with said character: Okay I’ve tried to keep it to one ship per character for these, but you KNOW Jean is my bicycle for this fandom. XD;; That said, I’ll go with Lisa, because no matter who I pair her with, once Lisa enters the picture I immediately start thinking about how to make it poly....

A BROTP I have with said character: Kaeya, obviously! Though also Barbara, in the wistful “I would like this for them” way.

A NOTP I have with said character: I... don’t really have one. I will take Jean with ANYONE.

A random headcanon: Jean lies VERY badly. She understands when it’s necessary, and she does her best, she’s just not good at it and generally delegates any serious diplomatic/mission-critical lying to other people because she has a thousand tells.

General Opinion over said character: MY GIRL. 12/10, beautiful, stunning, powerful, perfect, no notes*. *(many notes, but all her flaws just make me love her more as a character >> I have a type and Jean is it)

#asked and answered #why not meme i guess #kaeya is a bundle of knives behind a smile #someone please give jean a nap

[atrophy-fathers-daughter]

Pet peeves about my roommate that literally make me consider ended it

1. Garbage in the sink I swear to fucking god who puts garbage into the sink? It makes me sick. Not only is it in the sink but it’s wet and mixed in with dirty dishes

2. She doesn’t do dishes. I went on a dish strike for 8 days where I did not go anywhere near the kitchen sink because it was so disgusting and she didn’t do dishes once, in EIGHT DAYS.

3. Dirty shoes in the house. Not just I need to grab something I forgot. Dirty shit covered shoes all through the house with no concern of cleaning up

4. Leaving the front door open. Why? Why can’t the door just be fucking closed? I have a cat and I’ve made it so abundantly clear that she can not go outside yet the door remains open every fucking day

5. Not cleaning. She does not clean whatsoever it’s disgusting

6. Complaining about her job. She doesn’t have a ‘real’ job she’s a farmer and I know farmers work they run the country but she literally doesn’t do anything she go outside for 4 hours max just to order other people around

6. Coming in my room uninvited. My room is my one place that I have control, the one place I keep clean. She comes in almost everyday to complain about her fake job and get my room disgusting. Sometimes she just comes in to shake off her dirty barn clothes and then leaves

7. Regularly leaving the stove on. Every other day I come home from work and the fucking stove is on. Is it so goddamn hard to have some fire safety

9 she’s a koreaboo. The absolute worst one I’ve ever seen. I enjoy kpop so I’ve seen saesangs and she’s worse

10. Having opinions like a white man. She’s so far right politically and it’s awful. Her opinions are the only ones that matter and if you disagree you’re wrong

11. Claiming to be asexual then telling me I’m her ‘lesbian pass’ and that I’m her lesbian. I am not a lesbian I’m an agender bisexual being constantly harassed

12. Not being okay with transgender. She has no idea I’m agender or Skye because I simply cannot deal with what would happen after that conversation. Her little brother is trans and as far as she’s concerned he’s dead to her.

13. Not believing in therapy. She’s a literal psychopath. I don’t say that lightly she has murder fantasies regularly and does kill animals‘ just because’ she once killed a cat who just had a kitten because she didn’t like it anymore.

14. Wishing her mom would kill herself because she finds her very annoying. Her mom is severely depressed and has been having an awful time since her accident which was tragic is all I’m going to say about it. She told me this proudly knowing I have tried to kill myself and have been hospitalized because of it.

15. Being against my consumption of recreational drugs. It is legal where I am to smoke weed which I do for medical reasons mostly sometimes I just feel like I need and that’s okay. I’m not an addict not that there is a problem with people who are it’s mostly just an occasional thing. I took up smoking darts because of her even though I do vape it wasn’t enough to deal with her which she is also aware is her doing.

16. Being so incredibly loud all the time. She has one volume and it’s screaming. Her voice is ruined because she’s never used an inside voice. Her hearing is gone because of her own yelling. And every time I’ve brought it up to be quiet she and I quote ‘that’s what you get for living with me’ getting a little excited is okay I get that but yelling at top volume from 8 am to 11 pm is just in called for

17. Treating me like I’m beneath her because she sublets to me. I’m less of a person because she rents out a room to me. Treating me like this is her apartment and I am an unwanted guest. I pay rent and a lot I might add to be in a single room not really allowed to do anything or use the living room. Because that’s hers and I can use it if I don’t change the tv or move anything.

18. Telling me to move out so she can turn my room into a ‘mannequin room’. If you didn’t think she was a psychopath before she wants a room dedicated to mannequins. Not to use just to have there because it would be better than having a human friend.

19. Not letting me have friends over because she doesn’t like them, yet inviting her friends over on a week night to be even louder because she doesn’t care that I have work in the morning

20. Making me take her places. She does not drive anywhere she has a license and car. She’s a terrible driver that shouldn’t be on the roads but that’s not why I have to drive. She just doesn’t like to and thinks is better that I’m a chauffeur. Never has she once paid for gas and I don’t know if you’ve noticed but gas is fucking expensive. Buying me a drink most times when we go out is good enough to her.

21. Hating my style. She hates on what I wear because I’m more punk/ getting into gothic even though her preferred fashion is tech wear which is also alternative fashion. She also hates the mohair I like even though I like kpop we don’t listen to the same groups and has to comment on how bad she thinks what I enjoy is

22. Constantly victimizing herself. She’s a bully and all around bad person who thinks every problem is about her. Her brother who’s trans said she makes him feel like killing himself and she thinks that just him trying to make her feel bad. She’s constantly fishing for compliments to make her self feel better like asking you to tell her she’s not terrible or stupid.

23. Not believing in therapy. She thinks therapy is a joke and seeing a therapist is stupid and makes you week. The only reason I have survived being around her is because I was in intensive therapy for years. The only thing keeping me together is working through my issues with a licensed professional but to be that’s just a joke and a waste of time.

I’ll probably have more but I think that’s all I can handle thinking about for now, thank you for coming to this long winded rant and I’m sorry this is on the Internet

#mental health #sorry for the rant #lgbtq #roomates #illnesses #koreaboo #angry rant #list

[teaveetamer]

The things about anyone who sides with Edelgard is fine actually (tm) interesting and I agree I remember seeing a Twitter post about what a bad character Monica was and the reply was "She actually has a lot of depth and plot relevance because she’s a lesbian. Hope that helps" That doesn't make her a better character? These are the same people who dislike the other simp characters right? They even said it's an insult to compare her to Faye. Why because it's Edelgard she simps for?

God “she’s a lesbian so she must be a good character” gives me the same vibes as “this story is deep because a girl got sexually assaulted” vibes (ETA: See the edit below for further explanation on this one). Like for some people that’s where the whole depth begins and ends. It’s mere existence within the narrative is somehow enough, no need to justify its existence with actually good writing or sensitive handling or meaningful integration into the narrative.

She is fundamentally exactly 0% different from the Faye archetype. Her simping for a girl over a guy does not make her somehow deeper than that. And why should it? Being a lesbian isn’t some deep or profound experience in itself. It’s literally basic biographical information about who you like to kiss/bang. The interesting parts are how it informs your world view and the person it makes you. Which, and I cannot stress this enough, is given exactly zero focus in Monica’s story. So no, it does not make her interesting or better than the other Fayes.

ETA, since it might be unclear why I'm making this comparison in the OP:

It’s the same principle to me: predominately straight, predominantly cisgendered, predominantly men co-opting the experiences of women/queer people under the false impression that it creates narrative depth, while refusing to understand or portray those narratives in a way that is meaningful or relatable to the people they presume to be representing.

I suppose I could have used something different, but SA was simply on my brain because I watch quite a lot of horror games (happy October!), and sexual assault is a very common theme in the genre. It’s frequently treated as a writing crutch, the “easy button” to portray a horrific experience (since naturally all decent people are horrified by it) but it doesn’t say anything. It’s there to create shock value rather than to be a meaningful exploration of women’s experiences with sexual violence or the culture that helps perpetuate it, and thus its use in story or in argument winds up coming off as cheap. The women who experience it in these games are often portrayed as if that is the ONLY thing about their experience that matters, and you are often given no further detail beyond their name (sometimes not even that) and the fact that they were assaulted. It’s incredibly uncomfortable and dehumanizing to hear the meta-message: “The important thing about this character is the fact that they’ve been assaulted. Nothing else, just that. When you are assaulted, there is nothing meaningful about you aside from your experience with assault and thus we feel no need to engage with your experience further.” Not to mention it can have very sexist undertones, but that can be a story for another post.

(Note that I am not saying all portrayal of SA in media is like this. But you can usually tell when a writer is attempting to approach a subject with sensitivity and grace and when a writer is leaning on it as an emergency writing crutch. I’m also not implying that only women experience SA, however in the horror genre this type of writing is disproportionately applied to female characters and is often very gendered).

Similarly, being queer is frequently treated as a meaningful character trait in itself with no need to explore further or engage meaningfully with the experiences of queer people. It can come off as tokenism and dehumanizing to be told the meta-message: “The important thing about this character is the fact that they’re queer. Nothing else, just that. When you are queer, there is nothing meaningful about you aside from who you love and/or who you bang and thus we feel no need to engage with your experience further.” I shouldn’t have to say this, but queer people are complete human beings with a depth of experience and being reduced down to our sexuality, by people who frequently do not look like us I might add, is certainly something. Heterosexual people are never treated as if their experience starts and ends with their sexuality, and I simply believe we deserve the same respect. And being queer should not be treated as a shield against character criticism. Being queer does not make you better or worse than anyone else.

[This part in response to someone claiming that the statement in question in the anon was a joke]

And I’m sorry, but I can’t know whether someone is joking when they say stuff like “being a lesbian gives you depth” on the internet. I don’t know if they’re gay, straight, man, woman, enby, cis, trans, or anything else. It’s not as if every person who says that kind of thing is joking. So I’m approaching it with a serious tone, because even if this particular person is joking and is the kind of person who understands the queer experience, this is still a mentality that is often found in media representation of queer folk and it does warrant discussion from that perspective.

#edelgard discourse #tw: SA

[lilmerh]

for pride asks!!

3, which pronouns do you use?

7, are you the token queer person in your family?

14, how do you think other factors like neurodivergency or upbringing have impacted your identity?

21, what message would you give to your younger self?

25, which part of queer discourse frustrates you the most?

3. She/they/he and also secretly fae prns!! I don't like telling people my pronouns. It makes me gender dysphoric for some reason I can't quite figure out

7. I think so! At least I'm the only openly gay person I know in my entire fam

14. My upbringing definitely helped bc I wasn't raised by homo/transphobic people, nor were surrounded by them in school or other places. This led to me having no shame upon learning I was gay (I did have a bit of a struggle with not being "trans enough", but overtime I worked through that).

My Autism Sense Of Justice made me very stubborn in my beliefs of LGBT rights, equity n equality, and I try to speak in favour of this whenever I can (in class, assignments, and such, mainly).

My autism itself didn't impact my gay identities much... except for figuring out my romantic identity. A major question I asked myself used to be "am I aromantic or just autistic???". Those two may seem unrelated, but being autistic, it made me question my aromantic identity a lot. The main reason was basically "am I actually aromantic, or does my autism just mean I dislike/experience differently the societal expectations of romance?" f.ex. kissing, that weird eye contact thing, other body language "signs" of crushing, playing hard to get n other things that were viewed as romantic that I just hated.

Over time I came to the conclusion that I should just... try calling myself aromantic and follow other aros and read their experiences and see if my mind changed. If I was wrong, I could always just... change the label I use for myself. An' now I confidently identify as aromantic lol (technically more accurately greyromantic and biromantic, but I just say aromantic because it's easier + I don't have to care too much about defining myself)

21. I don't have much I would say to myself tbh. If anything, I would tell my younger self to not watch like... Steven Crowder and other cringe ppl's LGBT videos. During a short period of time (that I grew out of bc I stopped agreeing with their views), I used to watch conservative's vids on LGBT because I believed I "had to remain neutral" (for whatever reason) and so had to "respect" their takes even if I didn't agree with em.

I don't know if I would actually tell my younger self to not watch them, though, bc I think in some way, having had that short phase was beneficial to my development?

-It makes me slightly more understanding to people who don't know much about the LGBT and might say off things. Since I fell for the cringe ppl's words for a short bit, I can extend a certain degree of understanding to people who aren't outright hateful, but still say off things/agree with the cringe ppl (note "a certain degree")

-The embarassement from having listened to bigoted ppl for some time makes me wore open to learn an be against exclusion + be more firm in my own beliefs because OMG I do NOT want to repeat that mistake again *skull emoji*

25. If I were to pick one... probably the insistance that labels are set in stone and no person can ever break them or use contradictory or confusing labels.

Gayness, for many of us is hard to define, or we might just not want to, for whatever reason. For some, using a broad label like "queer" is more comfortable. For some people, their labels might change with time or how they feel (say, a genderfluid person who identifies as achillean "despite" being a girl sometimes). Sometimes it's a matter of community (like, a transmasc still calling himself a lesbian, even though that label is mainly assosciated with women, because he identified as a lesbian for years and still does bc he still has ties to the community). Sometimes people choose one label over another more "accurate" one (like me!! I think omnisexual would technically describe my attraction the most accurately, and yet I choose bi. It's more well known + it's just always been there for me, yk?)

Being gay is confusing!! Not everyone can decipher the exact labels that describe their experiences perfectly. Not everyone wants to, either. Some people feel more trapped by doing that than just calling themselves "trans".

I am all for people making super-specific labels to describe their experiences, and I ALSO think no one should force another gay person to use/conform to a specific label.

In my opinion, LGBT labels are mainly useful for two things:

To understand your own experience, describe your experience to yourself

Communicate that experience to others, find community, have a word for your similar experiences, use that word + community to fight against anyone who tells you you're lesser than or don't exist

I think the more important factor is that people feel comfortable with the label they choose, rather than fretting about which label to choose.

Policing labels never does anything helpful for the community, it just brings infighting. Also, it ignores the fact that each label has a different definition depending on who you talk to. Many labels also have a long history, which means people are gonna have different opinions of what it means because language naturally changes and evolves. (One term is "lesbian". I've seen so many different definitions and flag variations, I probably couldn't list them all. Another one is "transgender", which evolved from "transsexual" which evolved from "transvestite".) No label in the LGBT community is viewed 100% identically by every person. Therefore, we should just let people assign whichever label they want to their own experience.

Everyone experiences being gay differently; forcing everyone with a specific experience to use a specific identity kills the biodiversity and variation within that community.

#ask time #this doesn't feel very... coherent... but i hope you will still enjoy reading #lilh text

[newmoonjuno]

As a latina from actual Latin America... Wtf did I just see on your blog. I don't even care about YA high-school romance since I left high-school, but latines from the US apparently can't write about... being latine in the US... where they grew up... as latine descendants... in the US... anymore... I guess we'll just pretend 20% of the US population doesn't exist and might still have cultural ties to their home countries?? Sure it isn't the same experience as being born over here, but how does that even matter for a book set in the US, with US latinas and written in English, so clearly not primarily for the Latin American market, probably for other US latines?

Actually, wait, I have something else to say about this. I'm not Mexican, but there's also a big immigrant presence from my country in the US. Same as there's lots of asian descendants in Latin America, for example. And of course their culture here will be different from their home countries, but it doesn't make them any less Other here at times, or erases all the traces of their original cultures. And there's a fuckton of novels about asian latines, I spent a whole year studying them at school once. It's important to hear about other voices inside our communities. There's a problem when US latine voices are louder than ours about our own issues and when other groups in the US assume the US latine experience is the one and only default, when actually Latin America is vast and very diverse. But the solution to that problem isn't blaming the US latines who are a minority in their country and kind of pushed apart from the rest of society because of it? They have the right to create their own new culture there, with elements of their home country, and celebrate it in books. They aren't lying about being latine. And culture purism won't solve OUR problems with US cultural imperialism either!

It's nonsense shitting on a cousin for writing books about their own latine experience. Why are those people so mad about kids' books??? You aren't the target audience and that's all, bestie. Let the US latine babies have something to read when they're growing up too

I struggle to find the weight of my voice as the descendant of a Latin American man who immigrated to the US; your guess is good as mine what I saw as well. Judging by the person's blog, she don't realize like a very nice person -and also that some of their attack seems to be a little queerphobic [misgendering Sonora Reyes obvs, and considering I am seeing people mention catholic tumblr, just being pissed that Reyes is writing from their experiences being in Catholic school, and it being a lesbian story). And the OP even more questionable.

I do not know how else to articulate that I agree fully with your points, anon. Thank you.