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placeinthemiddleofnowhere · 1 year

Text

Together we fill gaps

Pairing: König x Reader

Summary: You’re determined to find out why everyone thinks König is so scary, afterall he’s just some guy that’s taller than most people right? He’s probably harmless! Well, he’s a little scary, but you still like him anyway.

(No use of y/n or mention of gender/race)

Warning: Angst, Drinking

AN: You've all been treating me so much with your feedback with this series and I'm so happy to get another part out for you guys! Hope you enjoy 💕 Also, as it's come up a couple times, if you read this series and want to make something inspired by it then PLEASE go ahead, I'll be excited to see what you guys make!

Part 4 of A Rocky Start - Full Masterlist Here

-☠️-

You waited outside the dark double doors of the meeting room like a sinner before confession, hands wringing at your sides and eyes full and wide, ready to plead for mercy. You’d even managed to bite your tongue a couple times because you were trying so hard not to look like you’d done something wrong; mind practically melting with the cold hard fact that you had.

Even after being told to stay away from König in the heat of an ongoing operation, after being told exactly who he is on numerous occasions in fact, you’d still gone against their word and your better judgement. You’d kissed him.

You felt like a walking TV disaster, the kind of person in the movie that you watch and you yell ‘why the hell would you do that?’ to the screen while they throw their lives away on bad decisions. And now you were being called into some meeting that Price had arranged - without telling you its purpose - you could almost hear the Jaws theme flaring behind your ears. It made your mouth dry up.

You were your own worst enemy, trapped in your mind as the rickety scaffolding collapsed around you. You’d clawed onto thoughts of how the meeting was going to go while losing yourself to the memory of König’s possessive grip around your waist and the phantom feeling of tingles swelling on your lips.

You were going to end up buried in the fallout and there’d be no one to blame but yourself.

“You’re early,” Price rumbled behind you.

You snapped your head around to the sound of his voice and pursed your lips, already feeling a cold flash race down your spine. You’d been more excited to rush into firefights than you were to go into that meeting, and that went double when you noticed Ghost following behind the Captain.

“Figured it’d help,” you said breathlessly, hoping he’d recognise your good intentions.

Price grunted and Ghost said nothing. They brushed past you and walked into the depths of the meeting room, turning on the light as if they were about to start an investigator routine. You doubted either of them would play the good cop, that much was obvious. However you did wonder what they knew, what they’d found out since you’d come back from the mission.

Did either of them know about the kiss?

You sighed and walked forward, feeling impossibly heavy and gut wrenchingly anxious. Every step was another closer to your telling off - something you rarely had to face up to. And before too long you were standing over a seat they’d pulled out for you and begrudgingly lowered yourself into it, facing the steely eyed men situated across from you.

It didn’t help that the chair felt like a torture device. Hard pieces of ripped leather dug into your skin from the back and the lumpy cushion had you shifting in place, making you look even guiltier. Just great, as if you needed to look any worse in front of them.

“So,” Price began, leaning forward over his chair, “Ghost filled me in on the op yesterday - in private.”

He’d neglected to take his seat, opting instead to lean over it like he might lunge at you at any given time. His eyes were harsh, swirling with the warning of an oncoming storm.

You swallowed a hard lump in your throat - trying not to think about the way it felt like ingesting a bowling ball. It sounded almost as loud, the room was deadly silent save for the stuttering clock on the wall and the sound of your collective breathing. You’d sat down in a horror set of your own creation.

“I’m sure you know why that was,” Ghost said, staring across at you with an almost piteous look.

His eyes were stony behind his skull mask, shadowed and layered thickly with a seriousness you’d never known before, not even during your work with him. He wasn’t ready to pounce on you like Price, but he certainly wasn’t going to save you from him either.

“Because I went against your orders,” you murmured.

“Speak up,” Price growled, going as far as to use your real name.

Well that wasn’t good.

“I went against your orders,” you said again, voice clear and unwavering.

Even despite the looney tunes levels of fear you felt, you knew not to disobey the Captain when he shouted at you like that. You spoke like you were on stage, addressing the nation.

“You did,” Ghost confirmed, straightening up. “Can you tell us what your orders were?”

You bit your lip, wrangling it between your teeth like tasting blood might dose you up in some way. The skin felt fit to burst like a honeydew, already worn from the night before’s activities. Perhaps the physical pain would distract you from the way Price and Ghost were looking at you as if they were ready to string you up like a war criminal, distract you from thinking about König even while they did so.

“My orders were to wait downstairs with Gaz and Soap and keep watch for any stragglers,” you finally said, recalling the exact words he’d barked at you before you were tossed downstairs to the corpse pile.

“And what did you do?”

“I…I lost it when I realised what was going on upstairs and I- I disobeyed the order and tried to go into the room we’d located the hostage.”

“And why was that?” Price asked this time, his eyes boring into yours.

“I- I don’t know,” you faltered, digging your nails hard into your palms.

“What do you mean you don’t know?” He sneered.

“I- I-...Captain, I don’t know what I was going to do. I didn’t like what we were doing, what we were enabling, and I acted before I thought. I-”

“Acted before you thought,” Price interrupted, coming around from his chair and advancing toward you. “You act before you think again and next time it’s not Ghost reprimanding you, next time you could end up with a bullet in the head, or who knows? Maybe you walk out onto a landmine because you wanted to skip off and smell the fucking roses!”

You breathed in and backed up in your chair, leather carving into your back as you did so, heartbeat wrenching upwards into an absurd chorus. You could barely focus on Price as he walked toward you and snarled like a wounded animal, ready to take you down himself before let any stray bullet pierce you.

“It won’t happen again, Captain,” you quavered, trying to hold onto what little of your strength you could. “It was stupid and reckless. It’s not the kind of person I am, and I- I let myself down. I don’t ever want to do that again.”

“You’re damn right you let yourself down,” Price muttered. “Let yourself down all in the name of some crush you have as well, because don’t think that i don’t know exactly why you wanted into that room - exactly who you were trying to get at! I trusted that after our little talk you’d be able to keep a safe distance from König and keep things professional, but clearly I overestimated you…So, because of your actions, and in the interest of getting the 141 back alive and safe in future without worrying about what you might unthinkingly do, you’re not to speak to him again, do I make myself clear?”

Every fibre in your being wanted to scream and lash out. You wanted to stand up and face Price and tell him he couldn’t order you to do that, that König wasn’t on the team so he couldn’t stop you from seeing him. Though, you knew if you did it was a one way ticket to getting booted back home and god knows if it would be a permanent trip or just a stint to sort you out.

You stamped out the thought of disagreeing immediately, and you nodded, feeling as if your head were on an automated hinge. Self preservation had kicked in at last and for a few minutes your head was clear from hazy starry thoughts and focused solely on your career, on the hard work you’d done to achieve your position. You couldn’t throw it all away.

“Yes, Captain. You’re clear.”

You didn’t stutter or stumble, you looked him in the eye and hardened your jaw. A small smile seemed to cross his lips at last. It didn’t remain there for long, but he looked less like he was ready to strangle you till you were cold and blue, and that at the very least was something.

“Good,” he said simply, drawing back from your chair and heading toward the heavy doorway. “Don’t ever disappoint me like this again.”

He disappeared from the room, trailing out like the smoke cloud that usually lingered with him, and left you without another word. You’d mistakenly thought you were alone for a second, feeling the tension drain out from the door and released a breath, planting your face into your palms.

You weren’t alone though, Ghost was still there, perched over the chair that he dwarfed like a statue. It was normally a comical sight, but you weren’t ready to see the funny side of anything at that point. You weren’t ready to see much at all as you silently hoped the darkness would swallow you, remaining hunched into your hands.

“He was really worried when I told him,” Ghost finally said, huffing a little as he thought back, “He couldn’t believe you of all people went against an order - especially on an operation like this, when we had to keep ourselves clean. He didn’t like the thought of you on another mission with könig and getting yourself hurt chasing after the cunt either.”

You stiffened when you heard him speak and slowly lowered your hands, chancing a look up at him. He didn’t look nearly as menacing as Price had, he looked contemplative. His eyes glanced up at the ceiling and his thick arms were wrapped around each other, he leaned back in his chair a little as he continued to think deeply.

“I got that,” you snorted, biting your lip. “Is it time for you to give me a bollocking now too?”

He chuckled and shook his head. It was a welcome sound, rough and rich like velvet.

“I told you off already, remember? Besides, I don’t think I could top that.”

“Then what are you still doing hanging round? You making sure I don’t run to witness protection?”

Ghost shook his head again and stood up, sighing as he walked toward you. He stopped just short of your chair and raised his hand, letting it awkwardly hang in the air a second.

“I just wanted to make sure you were going to be ok,” he said, resting his big mitt on your shoulder. “And…I wanted you to know that we’re off to the pub later. The guys were asking after you.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Price isn’t going, Sneaky. You’ll only be stuck with us,” he assured.

“And if I say I want to sit and feel sorry for myself for a little while?”

“I’d say that you’re not locking yourself up in your room like a little princess, sweetheart. You can either come with us or I can find something for you to do around the base. Your choice,” he said, the glint of a smile appearing in his eyes.

He wasn’t giving you much of a choice at all.

-💀-

“Sneaky! Over here.”

You cast your eyes over the crowded pub, straining to hear over the low din of everyone's voices, and looked for the source of the callout, finally finding Soaps waving arms amongst the masses. It was a busy night, but still they’d managed to find a free booth somewhere off in the corner. You had no doubt there’d be a drink there waiting there for you too.

Given the pub was one of the few closest to the base, it was pleasant enough to pass your time in. It was a little dim, the faint yellow lights not enough to combat the low ceilings and lack of windows, but it was cosy. The old wooden bar top and well worn blue floors felt homey in that familiar sort of way and you liked that it always smelt like hops and aged varnish. It was a proper old man pub, but nevertheless served as a tradition.

“Thought you were going to bail on us,” Ghost said, watching as you finally drew up to the table.

“And miss out on all the action?” You laughed dryly, tilting your head at the three men who sat comfortably against the sagging cushioned seats. “Never.”

“You tryin to say we’re no fun?” Soap asked, clutching his chest in mock alarm.

“Mm, depends if that pint’s for me or not.”

“It was, but if you’re gonna be cheeky then-“

Soap made a play to grab the tall bubbling glass next to him, but you beat him to it. You were tipping your head up and gulping it down before he could register that you’d stolen it from his reach.

“Fuckin hell, slow down,” Gaz laughed.

You lowered your glass to Gaz’s protest and watched as the golden liquid sloshed and levelled to around halfway. You hadn’t realised how much you’d needed that. With an eyebrow raise and a swipe of your tongue over your lips, you finally took your seat next to Soap. The men watched you and you watched them in some kind of cowboy style standoff.

“I take it everyone knows about my verbal beat down then?”

Soap and Gaz looked away, but Ghost's eyes remained trained on you. They were completely unashamed, unbothered that you knew he’d been gossiping again.

“Is anything sacred round here,” you muttered, taking only a bitter sip of your beer this time.

“They were on the mission too, not like it’s news to em’,” Ghost sniffed.

“Price was chain smokin’ a belter today too, it was obvious something happened,” Soap muttered from behind his glass. “Garrick asked about it but he wouldn’t say-“

Gaz shoved at him, knocking his teeth against his glass.

“Oi!”

“Don’t drag me into it!” Gaz groused.

“Well…regardless, Price wouldn’t tell us what was up, but Ghost said he’d spoken to you about what happened and that was why he had a face like a slapped arse.”

You snorted and shook your head. Soap was ever the eloquent storyteller.

“And he didn’t tell you anything else?” You asked, surprised he hadn’t mentioned the ultimatum.

“Almost like I’m a professional or something,” Ghost chuckled, leaving back in his corner.

You raised your eyebrows and took a breath to ease your relief. In fairness to him, he loved to rile you up and tease you, but when it came to work he genuinely was strict about these things. Things like private meetings where you were told you couldn’t continue to pursue a certain masked Austrian. Surprisingly enough.

However, with that thought, you were sent spiralling back to the dilemma that had been torturing you all day. Thinking about König made your heart sink with heaviness. It dropped like an anchor. That kiss from the night before had been the last time you’d seen him, the last time you’d be able to speak to him. You had so many things you’d wanted to talk through and clear up. Now - you had to ignore him at the cost of your job and you felt even worse about all that hadn’t been said. It made you feel like you’d used him, you worried he’d see it that way too.

“What happened then?” Gaz asked, noticing you disappear into yourself.

You shook yourself out of your stupor, poorly trying to cover it up.

“What?” You asked innocently.

“At the meeting?” He prodded. “What’d Price say?”

“Almost sounds like you’re excited,” you bit out, deflecting as much as possible. “Someone’s enjoying being the sole favourite again, hmm?”

“Don’t be a dick, Sneak. Remember that time I fumbled the breach on that door in France - I almost blew us all to hell, you remember how bad that was? Price was fucking livid with me, and even then he was able to let that go eventually. And then after it happened, after he almost killed me for it, you told me to talk about it all so I wouldn’t have it trapped in my head, so just tell us. What’d he say?”

A deep shuddering breath left your lungs like a gale. Suddenly the pint in your hand was much more interesting than you’d ever found a drink. The way the liquid sloshed and foamed white, the bubbles fizzing in your ears like static, it drew your eye for a few moments until you risked a glance up to Ghost, watching his eyes roam your face. He was interested to see if you’d keep deflecting or come out with it, expression stony.

“He said I couldn’t talk to König again, and I’m assuming you won’t see me round base for much longer if I decide to go against him.” You sighed.

Soap and Gaz raised their eyebrows, but they didn’t look too shocked. However, they did risk a look at each other and something seemed to ring through their expressions. A little bright bulb of knowledge, wordless but obvious. What was it they were thinking about, what had happened?

“Spill,” you growled.

Ghost looked equally as intrigued, sitting up from his slump in the corner. That was interesting too. Soap knew something that Ghost didn’t - for once.

“Well me n’ Gaz were comin’ out the gym together and we were gonna go to the kitchen quickly before the showers and eh…the Captian was in there having a word with the big guy.”

“A word? What do you mean?” You asked, nails digging into the sticky wood of the table.

“Couldn’t hear, but it was obvious they weren’t agreeing,” Gaz shrugged. “König looked like he was going to strangle Price.”

“Price just stood there as well, shoulders back, relaxed as anything. König was all over the place, shouting in German and smashing his fist on the counter before he stormed out. We left before he reached us - as you can imagine,” Soap laughed nervously, clearly still affected by the sight.

Shouting in German? It wasn’t like him to slip into his native language when he was around the base. You’d heard him start to speak it once or twice when he got the occasional phone call from his family, but he rarely strayed from English. Only when he was mumbling to himself or surprised or annoyed about something would you hear the odd word or curse outside of speaking on the phone, but he didn’t let those out often. He must’ve been in a horrible mood to be shouting like that at the Captain.

“Do you know what he said?” You asked curiously.

“How the fuck should we know,” Soap chuckled. “He was doing that thing where his voice goes all loopy and high pitched. Sounded like a cartoon character, ‘eek meek deek’ somethin’ somethin’ - he was goin’ bananas.”

“Ich mach dich kalt?” You tried, briefly recognising the sounds of the words from a story König had told once - about an older boy chasing after him with a swiss army knife.

“Yeah sounded just like that actually! What’s it mean?” Gaz said.

“I’ll make you cold - I’ll kill you, basically,” you said, biting your lip. “Sounds like he was really fucking angry with Price.”

-💀-

Despite not having wanted to go out that night, you’d had a nice time. After you’d stopped talking about the whole Price debacle, the conversation revolved more around usual topics and for a little while it felt like everything was ok again.

König lingered ever present in the back of your mind, but the boys provided a good distraction and you were glad that Ghost forced you out of your cave of isolation. He’d known exactly what you needed, as little as you’d like to admit it.

You’d ended the night on six pints and walked back to base merry, singing along to a nonsense song that Soap was singing, grinning ear to ear and holding onto him like your life depended on it. Your hand was wrapped tightly around his back and he was doing the same to you, forcing you along the street in a wild toppling sway that made your head spin. The stars looking like they were dancing and the trees swayed too and fro below them, like nature's flash mob in your blurry field of vision.

The song carried through the night like a fox call, but neither Gaz nor Ghost could stop you both from singing it. No matter how many times Ghost threatened discipline or Gaz told you there were people sleeping, nothing broke through your happy daze. Life was good, it was you and the 141; it was downing dry crappy beer in your favourite pub and telling stories about the times you all fucked up until you were all laughing along.

All until you passed by your usual sitting spot and noticed König posted up there, watching you walk along like a sentry. Your heart stopped and you stopped walking with it, sending Soap almost clattering to the ground. He was cursing you out and stumbling to his feet, in complete ignorance of the staring contest you held with your former…whatever he was to you.

König’s back was stiff, body upright and his eyes unblinking at you, glinting in the dark like precious diamonds - hard, sharp edged and dangerous.

Ghost and Gaz froze, they’d been walking up ahead, and turned back when they realised you and Soap were missing, and as soon as Ghost spotted König you could swear you heard him growl. He marched over, boots thudding like gun blasts, and yanked on your arm, manhandling both you and Soap away. You’d tried to look behind you, tried to silently tell König sorry with your gaze, but even that was stopped as Ghost shoved you forward and barked at you to keep moving.

“Has anyone ever told you that you’ve got the biggest hands, LT?” Soap hiccuped, simpering up at Ghost like an idiot.

“Big enough to strangle both of you if you don’t keep moving,” he’d muttered, eyes trained on you.

“Mm, some people really like big hands. My ex told me once…” Soap babbled, sent mad with the twelve pints he’d gotten through. “The bigger the hands, the bigger the-“

“That’s quite enough Sergeant!” Ghost interrupted, shoving Soap forward this time. “Both of you get inside and go to your rooms before I play conkers with your heads!”

-💀-

It wasn’t until a few days later that you had another run in with König. You were about to go into the kitchen when you noticed him standing by the counter, in his full hood, making a cup of coffee. To make matters worse, Price was about to walk in at the same time. He’d caught you lingering in the limbo of the kitchen and hallway, your hand gripping the doorway like the room might start shaking.

Price had smiled at you, finally able to look at you with something other than disappointment, and dropped his expression as soon as he noticed why you’d stopped. It wasn’t for his benefit, he must’ve realised, it was indecision about entering a room with König. He paused too, both of you stuck watching the unwilling Austrian zoo exhibition. It was only when Price walked forward and busied himself with looking in the fridge that you assumed you must be allowed in there too.

It all felt so ridiculous. The reality of the situation finally kicked in and you had to bite your tongue just to stop yourself from laughing. You were reduced to hiding in doorways and ducking round corners all to avoid a boy that you were forbidden from talking to. Next thing you knew you’d be telling Price you’d done your homework while you figured out a way to sneak out of your window.

You shook your head, trying not to think about it all and stared down at your shoes the minute König finally looked up at you. He grunted something too low for you to hear and moved aside, allowing you space to make your tea.

In turn, you sighed and took the handle of the kettle in your hand, testing the weight of it to see how much water was left and put it down satisfied that you could make your tea and leave. It was heavy, almost full, the slosh of water against metal was one of the few sounds that pervaded the tense atmosphere of the room.

You could hear your heartbeat inside your ears, it thudded dully like a warning. You opened the cupboard, hoping to escape the sound as soon as you could, drown it out with a movie and maybe a workout afterward. Though you stopped in confusion when you noticed your tea wasn’t there.

You frowned for a second until you remembered that Ghost had been fucking with you and Soap ever since that night at the pub. He took to petty revenge instead of anything official, and it was that that had you chancing a look on top of the cupboards, remembering when he’d done this before. Sure enough, you’d only just glimpsed a corner of the berry red packaging, but that was enough to tell you it had been put up out of your reach. Fuck sake.

“Fucking Ghost,” you muttered, hands on your hips like an annoyed teacher.

You refused to drink regular tea. It would be giving in to Ghost, and you were never one to do that unless under order and actively working (even then, you’d apparently shown yourself and everyone else you could rebel against him if the motivation was there).

You raked your hand down your face and sighed, marching over to the table so that you could retrieve a chair. Though, before you could even pull one out from the table König had noticed your situation and reached up wordlessly, retrieving the box of tea and setting it on the counter. He didn’t say anything after either, but he gave you a butter soft look as if to say I still care.

It broke your heart - even despite the things you knew about him that made you so angry - you missed him like hell.

You wanted to hug him and tell him just how much you’d missed him. You wanted to tell him how many times something had happened over the days that made your heart wrench because you wouldn't be able to chat to him about it. You missed his dry comments and evil little laugh, you missed when he’d get overly polite because he’d get flustered talking to you, and most of all you missed having that big muscled body pressed against you in some form another; beside you, up against you, an arm around you, a thigh brushing against yours. His heat was missing, your body had never been so cold.

“You hanging around long, König?” Price asked, voice lilting dangerously.

You gulped, your grip on the chair tightening. You watched as König clenched his fists and regarded the Captain, who was glaring daggers at him. Neither man looked ready to back down, but neither made a move forward. You were glad for it, you didn’t want them to fight in front of you. You didn't like the idea of König shouting.

“I figured I’d sit for a bit,” König finally said, leaning his heavy frame against the counter, “is that alright, Captain?”

“As long as you don’t mess with my team, you can do anything you like, König.”

“Polite of you to allow that,” König replied, distaste dripping from his tone.

“I’m a reasonable man.”

König sniffed at that, but he didn’t come out with a rebuttal. Instead he picked up his coffee and left, not in the mood to continue bickering back and forth with Price. You doubted he could last much longer either, his body looked fit to burst by the time he’d gone, ready to tear forward and claim Price’s head for his wall.

“Fucking KorTac,” Price muttered, slamming the fridge and walking out with a brown can.

-💀-

A few days later, after a couple more awkward encounters filled with longing stares and unspoken words, you’d been lying on your bed when first contact came.

You squealed like a school kid. You hadn't expected something to go flying across your floor and to the foot of your bed. At first you’d thought it was some kind of mouse until you calmed down and realised it was just a bit of paper that had gone skittering across the wood.

“What the fuck?” you mumbled to yourself.

You hesitantly picked up the note and almost dropped it like a hot potato when you saw the neat looping scrawl on the page. It didn’t look like any handwriting you recognised from your team and instinctually you knew exactly who had written it. Apparently he wasn’t as strong willed as you.

Meet me at The Broken Plough at 8.30, I know the 141 don’t go there.

When you read it finally, you found yourself falling back onto your bed, sending the springs groaning underneath you. The Broken Plough was further out than your usual pub, the one that was usually too full of people to get a seat at. It was charming and had a lot more of a modern touch to it, so it was no wonder more people flocked there, and you knew for a fact that König was going to use that to his advantage. More people meant less prying eyes, it meant crowds that could hide even a massive almost seven foot tall Austrian man.

“I’m not going,” you said out loud to yourself, perhaps as a command, perhaps as a promise. “I could lose my job.”

Nevertheless, whatever you tried to do by manifesting out loud didn’t work - you ended up worming your way out of the base just before eight o’clock. You walked through the cold night, steps crunching on the frosty grass and found yourself at The Broken Plough just before the agreed time, cursing yourself as you filtered through the crowd and toward the bar, blessedly finding a free chair.

If you were going to face König after all those days of not speaking, then you needed a drink or two first.

The vodka shot you ordered went down hard and bitter on your throat, however it paved the way for your double rum and coke to go down nice and smoothly. If you were going to put your position at risk, then you’d be damned if you were going to do it sober. It was a necessity really, even through the cold your body had been running hot with worry, and then as you sat at the bar you could practically feel your eyes vibrating as you looked down at the dark liquid in the wide glass, swirling it around and distracting yourself from the chatter of all the people around you.

“You came.”

You froze, registering the voice coming from your right side. It sounded soft, though you still heard it, completely undeniably coming from the man you’d been forbidden to talk to. His shadow cast itself across the bar and darkened your drink from treacle to tar. It was a shock at first, knowing you could speak to him in safety, and then it was a spark, a kick of lightning as if you’d been put under a defibrillator. You were doing something bad - but you’d don’t care.

You could talk to him again, it was safe.

Not that you could even find the words to say when you came to the realisation. You hadn’t even looked at him yet. You glanced up from your glass and gasped when you came face to face with him, eyes blowing up like supernovas.

He wasn’t wearing his hood, or his neck warmer, or even the usual uniform you came to expect him to be in. He was wearing roughed up jeans and a black t-shirt that could barely contain his upper arms, the fabric was straining around his muscles and looked fit to burst. Inexplicably your mouth started to fill, and you had to choke down a swallow just to greet him.

“König!” you squeaked, still running your eyes up and down his frame.

You were in disbelief. This was what König looked like? He might as well have appeared naked, you wouldn’t have reacted much differently. You caught sight of every detail you could, cataloguing the scars and bruises that ran along his arms like tiger stripes and leopard spots, gouges and slashes scattered carelessly, disrupting the blanket of fine blonde hair that ran across them. His chest was wide even without all the gear and bags normally strapped across it, his legs still thick without the baggy trousers he normally wore.

When you finally looked up at his face you caught him staring back at you with an expression crossed half with amusement and half with worry. You supposed he must’ve been anxious about how you’d react, and if you were going to show up at all - and now that you’d come and not said anything beyond his name. Did he think you were going to think better of your decision?

Certainly not now you’ve seen him looking like that, you thought absentmindedly. He’d even brushed his hair, it sat neatly on top of his head, running all in the same direction. He’d put effort in, he wanted to look good.

“Are you alright?” he asked finally, breathless.

“Yeah, just- I just can’t believe you’re standing in front of me right now and you look…like that.”

“Like what?” he replied, frowning and looking down at himself as if he’d done something wrong, as if he’d come out with two different shoes or something.

“Like um- like…” you bit your tongue and looked away from him, taking a sizable drink from your glass. “Good.”

“You think I look good?” he grinned.

König’s face broke out into a full smile, his soft lips and his big eyes making you dizzy. You ached to brush your hand against his jaw and pull him toward you, you wanted to kiss him again. Though you didn’t think you’d get to remain in your refuge for long if you wound up on top of him (or below, you didn’t mind) in public.

“Yes, you look good,” you said weakly, finishing the rum and coke down to the last sticky sweet drop.

“I figured it’d help if I was less recognisable,” he shrugged, “but if it works for you, then that’s good too.”

“I think people might still have their doubts about the six foot seven Austrian man,” you laughed.

“What if I lean?” he said conspirtorialy, lowering himself against the bar a little.

“Oh, much less conspicuous now,” you snorted.

You both chuckled at that, and he straightened up again with a shake of his head. Clearly you’d both missed each other’s company more than you’d realised, and with that realisation you were fighting to keep back a whine and your stomach was filling with butterflies. You were really speaking with König again. He was really there, in the incredibly handsome flesh.

“I missed you,” you sighed, propping your head against the arm you had leaning on the bar top.

“I missed you too,” he said quietly. “You have no idea how many times I had to hold myself back from talking to you. It’s been torture.”

“Well I guess I have to thank you for that. I’m only just back in Price’s good books,” you said bitterly.

“Price,” he grunted. “I still can’t believe it - what happened. He came up to me and told me about your meeting with him, you know, and he said if he caught me talking to you he’d get me kicked off the base for ‘unprofessional’ behaviour. As if that weren’t enough, when I told him to go ahead, he said he’d send you away to another team if you gave in.”

Your mind spun knowing that Price really was serious. If by some miracle Price chanced walking into the pub he swore that he hated, your role in the 141 was going to be dissolved in acid and shut into a barrel.

“The man knows how to make a threat, I’ll give him that,” you remarked.

“It’s not right!”

You sighed and ran your hand along König’s arm, feeling the hair tickle at your fingertips. He was a spring waiting to release, his muscles corded like he was ready to be unleashed onto the field. They only got tighter as you continued your ministrations, his face was turning unreadable, his breaths labouring in his chest.

How tightly wound was he? You were just stroking his arm.

“König, I’m not a fan of the decision either, but…I understand why he asked it of us.”

“What?” he growled, standing away from your reach.

“I know that what happened wasn’t exactly a live or die situation, but realistically it could’ve been. There could’ve been men we didn’t know about and they could’ve gotten to Soap and Gaz while I was off distracting Ghost. It could’ve been bad. It could-”

“Any situation could turn into anything, it doesn’t mean you should ban people from speaking to each other like you’re some kind of fucking teacher or something, he shouldn’t have that power.”

“He’s the Captain, he has that power for a reason, he has to do what’s best for his team,” you sighed. “Even when what’s best is really shitty.”

König looked like he could go on, but he saw the way that you were staring back at him and dropped it, looking utterly defeated. He clenched his jaw and looked around the bar, catching the faces of the people that milled around and seemed to be deep in thought. His brows had a little knot in the middle, just a little something you picked up, he was concentrating hard.

“If you agree with his decision then why did you come and meet me?” he asked, finally talking again.

“Because, I care about you. I couldn’t just never speak to you again - after everything y’know?”

He bit his lip.

“You still care about me even after all those things you said?”

It was your turn to go silent. You suppose you’d been expecting it to come up, but then again you were praying that it wouldn’t. Trying to explain the multitude of crossed wires and screaming signals in your mind was too difficult. You still didn’t like what went down, or the kind of work he did, but given more time to reflect, you were able to distance yourself from the situation and appreciate what he’d said that night before you'd kissed him. The person on the field and the person in front of you were separate although intertwined, they were day and night.

Inexplicably you wanted to stick around for the daytime, despite the darkness he was capable of.

“I don’t know where I fall on it all, but… I know that I missed you after not getting to speak to you for a week. I know that I thought about that kiss we had and I felt my lips go tingly every fucking time i did, and now that I say it out loud its really cringy, but you know what? It’s what happened. I think about you all the time, whenever I watch dumb videos and see someone out on a hike somewhere or reviewing some completely over portioned food place I think of you. I think about you and your pictures you show me, and the stories you’ve told me and I drive myself insane thinking about dates we could go on and things I wanna tell you about myself and I just…I want you. I want you in spite of it all. I never want to leave the 141, unless I absolutely have to, but I don’t want this to be the last time we ever speak either.”

König listened to you intently, his face grew soft and he drifted ever closer to you with each word that you said. His hands hovered across the bar and over onto you, warming your flesh as they grasped your thighs and they drew up to your shoulders.

As soon as you’d finished speaking he was kissing you again, and you were losing yourself to him, breathing him in, Soap and citrus and spice. You wove your hands through his hair and felt the slicked back strands separating through your fingers like grass in the summer. You held him close and kissed him deep, the burn of spirits that still coated your tongue dying as he replaced them with his own sweet taste.

When you separated, you were both breathing heavily, marathon level gasps were leaving your lungs, but you didn’t think much about it. You could feel how blown out your pupils were, you were sure they looked just like his. You smirked at him, and he smiled back, his eyes crinkling. There was still a little paint left behind in the creases.

“I don’t think that should be our last kiss,” König murmured.

“I don’t think so either…”

“Then what do we do?” He sighed.

You paused for a moment, feeling horrified at the thought of what you were about to say. Although, even with your mind racing and your heart thundering, you couldn’t stop yourself.

“You’re free some weekends right?”

Next Part Here

#König #König x reader #konig x reader #konig #könig fanfiction #modern warfare 2 #modern warfare fanfiction #mw2

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ysrjune · 3 days

Text

Forgive Me?

(ai images of hayden are not mine)

summary ✦ Anakin forgets to show up to a date he planned for you but makes it up (you also find out who spiderman is..)

‘No fucking way.’ You angrily thought to yourself when the clock hit 8:30 pm. Anakin was an hour late to the date he planned out for you a couple of nights ago, and it was weird enough that he wasn’t there waiting at the table for you. This is the 3rd time he’s missed/been late to something he said he’d be on time for.

You drove all the way back to your house and got un-ready, changing into comfy pjs but leaving your hair and makeup done. With a spoonful of ice cream in your mouth and the rest of the small tub in your lap, you watch whatever was on the TV, thinking about how mad you were at Anakin.

He knew he fucked up. Anakin knows he’s in for another scolding when he shows up to your house, but he can’t not save the city.. he’s spider-man, and it he doesn’t show up to save the citizens in danger, they’ll get hurt, and everyone would blame him the next day. Anakin always hated how he was basically forced to choose the city over you sometimes.. it broke him because you had no idea what he was doing instead of seeing you.

He was so worried at the thought of you thinking he was out cheating and partying with other people instead of being faithful to you. In his younger years, when you two were only friends, he was kind of a play-boy, but he promised you he wasn’t like that anymore when he asked you out for the first time. He was so worried you were thinking he went back (or never even left) to his old ways.

Later on in the night, you heard a tapping at your window. Your eyes shift to it, your heart feeling like it had stopped beating. Who the hell would tap your window? You didn’t want to go over there.. what if it was some freak who’d kidnap you or something?! But it happened again after you had tried to focus back on the TV.

With the courage finally built up, you walked over to your window and opened it, looking left and right. There was.. no one? It had only been a couple of seconds since the tapping stopped, so whoever was doing it couldn’t have run away that fast.

“M’ sorry.” A voice from above spoke, making you flinch and tilt your head up only to reveal the one and only spider-man. You gasped and felt like you could literally faint. Why is spider-man at your house?!

“What? I—sorry for what? You don’t even know me!” You reply, still in shock.. and looking up. Then it hit Anakin. You didn’t know he was spider-man. But maybe today was finally the day.

“Yeah, I do.” He slipped into the room with you following him. “Excuse me? Is this some kind of joke?!” But then he hushed you. “It’s me, n/n. It's Anakin.” He says and takes his mask off, revealing his messy hair and face that was slightly dirty and bruised.

No fucking way.

Your mind thought of so many things at the same time. It didn't feel real. “I’m hallucinating”, “I’m dreaming”, “Maybe he’s just trying to be funny.” and so much more.. there was no way your Anakin was spider-man. The guy who goes around saving people with fucking web.

“You’re—is this? Anakin, stop being stupid. You’re not funny!” You scoff, making him chuckle and shake his head. “Trust me, babe. I wish this was all just a big joke, but it's not.” He placed his hands on his hips, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling. “I should've told you sooner—maybe then you'd like.. I don't know? Understand why I bail on things sometimes.”

He looks right at you, taking in the mad but also shocked expression plastered on your pretty face that he loved so much. “Babe, I'm sorry. Please understand where I'm comin’ from, pretty girl.” He opened his arms, hoping you'd give into a hug.. which you did.

You were able to feel his muscles better than you ever could through that suit he wore. He also somehow seemed taller than he usually was, but maybe you were just tripping out. “Ani, why did you hide this from me..”

“We've only been together a couple of months, and I didn't wanna scare you off.” He replied, running his hands up and down the small of your back. “Theres no girl out there like you. None of them could replace you.” He rests his head atop your shoulder.

“I couldn't ever love any other girl like I love you.” That was the first time he ever admitted to loving you. This moment was never expected to be happening like this.. finding out your Anakin is spider-man.

“And I can't love any other man like I love you.” Hearing those words coming out if your mouth made you cringe and feel a little corny, but it was genuinely how you felt no matter how stupid and cliché it sounded. It made Anakin smile, too, so it was worth it.

“So do you accept my apology?” He asked calmly in a soft spoken tone. “Not entirely. You still owe me a date or two.” You replied to which he rolled his eyes. “Yeah, right.. about that..” He shot web out the window, and all of a sudden, there was a boquet of flowers and a box of chocolate. “I stopped by to get these to really change your mind.” He gave you his gifts.

“You swear you're off the hook just because you're being a sweetheart.” You giggled and placed both items on the top of your drawer that was decorated with pictures and various perfumes you owned. “Did it work at least just a little bit?” He asked.

“Taking off that suit would do it.” Anakin smirked and pulled you into a kiss. “Mad at me one second, then saying stuff like that the other.. I think I might be into that.” He mumbled against your lips. “You drive me crazy.”

That night, he smothered you with kisses.. and webbed you to the bed so that you'd stop squirming around while he fucked you slow and sweet. Whispering praises and letting out low groans. He was even still apologizing for standing you up.

“Im so sorry, baby. Let me make it up to you. Gonna let you cum all over my cock and use me.” He grabbed one of your breasts in his large hand, his thrusts becoming sloppy. “M’ gonna cum baby, please let me cum in you.” He sounded so pathetic, it was so cute.

He let you cum before he did. Anakin didn't end up finishing in you because you'd end up pregnant, which you two weren't ready for yet.

Dinner was skipped that night, but you were definitely gonna make him take you out for breakfast.

｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

tag list ✦ @heartsforanakin @anakinstwinklebunny @sockiess @erosmutt @rottencandyblood @radiantvader 🎀

please let me know if you wanna be added/removed from my tag list <3

#anakin skywalker #spider!anakin #anakin spiderman au #anakin x reader #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker fluff #anakin smut #star wars anakin #anakin x you #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker imagine

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thebroccolination · 24 days

Text

“IF NO ONE ACCEPTS YOU, YOU HAVE ME”

Lately I’ve seen the narrative around Krist shifting from “he’s homophobic” to “he was homophobic, but he got better :)” so!

Let’s go back to a moment in 2017 during a ceremony where Krist and Singto accepted an award from the Thai branch of the gay magazine Attitude (now defunct). That’s the magazine that published this photoshoot:

[Attitude, 2018, promoting SOTUS S] (they also did one in 2016 for SOTUS)

Krist said that a friend of his once came out to his parents, and the parents wouldn’t accept him, so Krist told his friend, “It’s okay. If no one accepts you, you have me, and I accept you for who you are.”

So, yes, Krist was hotheaded when people kept harassing him about his sexuality, but can anyone truly blame him? No one looks at all the times he answered politely. Just the one time he broke. [EDIT: I just spoke with someone who was there when the infamous IG story was posted, and they said: “Krist's tone and demeanour when he emphatically said "no" was like, y'know, still friendly. It's like when friends tease you relentlessly and you say ‘no’ more forcefully to get them to stop?” And that actually was my first impression of it back in 2020—a joke that landed badly. And it lines up with his first apology: that he felt badly because his answer was taken out of context.]

There are people today who film these guys at the urinal. Who treat them like property because of money and time spent on them. Who hire trucks to drive around their company building making demands. And it’s 2024. GMMTV has legal teams on this stuff now. But you and I can’t imagine what kind of invasiveness Krist and Singto went through in 2016 as one of the first pairs in the BL industry to gain overnight fame and rabid, unprecedented focus from millions. Of course he snapped. It’s widely known that fans and reporters target Krist over Singto to get information even today because Singto never gives anyone the satisfaction of a reaction, but Krist is a people-pleaser and truly struggles with saying no to people. He’s always been the emotional one, the one who overthinks, the one desperate to make people happy. And when fans wanted to force KristSingto to publicly say that they were secretly dating, fans thought they could get Krist to break first, and they were right. (Personally, I always thought the Instagram story was an exaggerated joke that was a barely veiled “drop it.” EDIT: I’m glad at least one person who was there at the time can corroborate this.)

Then interfans came along, marked him as an easy target, and maliciously miscast him as a bigot to wave after wave of new interfans who never bothered to research further after a random person on the internet told them he’s a homophobe.

Krist asked his parents for their blessing to audition for SOTUS when he was still a teenager. He was afraid of what they’d think, but because his parents are lovely people, they supported him. And they still do. Krist’s father has a running joke that he’ll let Krist marry Singto if Singto brings a durian for the dowry.

I never included Singto in my clarification thread because I knew how quickly people would dismiss anything with Singto as conniving, tricksy fanservice. But you really don’t know anything about Krist until you see him with people he considers his safe spaces. That includes people like Mike. Like Gawin. Godji. Oat. These people who love him because he’s earned it.

I know I talk about this a lot. But I won’t ignore it when people try to twist his character, especially with I see them making assumptions about the premise of Ex-Morning. All I believe is that he was angry and afraid and overwhelmed. Then he reacted, apologized, and learned how to handle the fame and the invasiveness better.

Please stop trying to claw marrow out of a past mirage.

#krist perawat #i’m just gonna post this now before ex-morning promo and kristsingto activities really get going #leave my son alone thank you

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builtbybrokenbells · 9 months

Text

Guilty Pleasures

Due to a strong foundation of trust and a willingness to share, a situation which would normally be catastrophic, seems to turn out to be quite rewarding.

Pairing: danny wagner x f!reader, jake kiszka x f!reader

Word Count: 20.4k (i am so sorry)

Warnings: SMUT 18+, threesome, unprotected/protected sex, rough sex, anal sex, double penetration, oral (f!receiving), oral (m!receiving), face fucking, fingering (f!receiving), dirty talk (lots and lots of dirty talk), choking, biting, name calling, praise, slight impact play, daddy kink, dom/sub, voyeurism, degradation, jealousy, mentions of cheating/thoughts of infidelity, arguing, asshole/shit disturber Jake, angst, fluff, sorry if i miss any!

this is pretty much pure porn. plot at the beginning, but mostly just sex. took a break from gdw for a little while just to straighten my thoughts with it, and came up with this idea and could not stop myself from writing it. it’s super long and very lightly edited, so I do apologize for that. please don’t judge me too hard for this one 😭 as always, be kind, enjoy, and don’t mind any grammar mistakes!

also! italics are the memories/past, everything else is present! thought I’d try something new this time 😁

The chime of the bell above the door signalled the entry of the newest patron of the bar. Normally, you would have eagerly greeted whoever walked in, but tonight, you were caught up in the chaos of the already crowded room. Dollar bills were waving in front of your face, hands raised in the air to catch your attention, and the occasional shout from an impatient customer filled the already loud atmosphere. Beer bottles were flying across the sticky wooden countertop in exchange for cash. Margarita and shot glasses were lined before you, only empty for a moment before they were shoved in the proper direction, too. You were working faster than you could comprehend, barely hanging on but surviving from the thought of your coworkers starting shift in a few minutes.

You took the early shift, thinking that you could breeze through the night with minimal stress and effort. For the most part, you were correct in thinking so. Unfortunately, when the clock struck eight, the city’s nightlife took a dramatic turn. As a result, the bar was quickly overrun with guests desperate for a buzz. Some were understanding, kindness oozing from them as long as they had a drink in their hand. Others were not, but you couldn’t blame them. There were far too many people in the bar for only a single bartender, and that wasn’t really a management issue, either. You were an establishment that was plagued with long time regulars and middle aged men in search of companionship. Every now and then a group of older women would check the place out, but rarely anyone under 30. So, you were confident in saying that it was unusual for you to house so many people in a single night, let alone all at once.

You rushed through your last few customers, serving everyone who had been waiting in hopes that they would still be generous enough to leave a tip. For the most part they were, and for that you were thankful. When the last person retreated, happily sipping on their beverage of choice, you took a moment to breathe. With both hands planted on the countertop and your head towards the floor, you took a much needed minute of rest. When a body presented itself in front of you once more, you thought you might shed a tear just at the thought of fixing another drink. “What are you drinking tonight?” You asked, aiming to sound as cheery as possible.

“You don’t know by now?” At the sound of the familiar tone, your head snapped up in surprise. “I’d be lying if I said that doesn’t hurt.”

“Shut up,” you landed a playful smack on his arm, your first genuine smile of the night fighting its way on to your lips. “Of course I do.” The words fell from your lips as you reached under the counter for a glass. You scooped a few ice cubes into the cup, the sound ringing nicely to his ears. You turned, grabbing a whiskey bottle from the top shelf, wasting no time pouring a double shot over the cubes. “Top shelf whiskey, always. Doesn’t matter the price, as long as that’s where it’s from and it’s a double.” You smirked, turning to place the bottle back in its place. “Three or four ice cubes. Not enough to water it down, but enough to keep it cold.” You continued, reaching for a citrus peel neatly arranged into a spiral from a plastic container beside the glasses. “And something to make it look pretty, as long as it doesn’t change the taste.” You arranged it neatly on the rim with a hint of cockiness seeping through your pores. “And served with a smile, because that’s what makes it taste the best.” You placed it in front of him, paired with the sweetest smile your cheeks could adorn and a soft wink.

“You really do know me, trouble.” He picked up the glass, swirling it around so the ice could cool the liquid. “I’m sorry I ever doubted you.”

“You should be, Jacob. I wouldn’t be a very good bartender if I forgot my favourite customers’ order.” He took a small sip, fighting the urge to dish out another compliment. He knew better, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t tempted.

“Busy spot tonight,” he noted, looking around at the bustling room. The booths and tables were so full that people had taken to standing by the walls, content with being seatless and lost in chatter with each other. “Suppose you actually had to work, not just sit here and look pretty.”

“Nothing wrong with doing both.” You reminded. “Although I don’t think you’d know too much about the working class.”

“Right,” he chuckled, taking a seat on one of the stools. “But I do know a thing or two about looking pretty.” You gave him a shrug, not willing to play into his ego.

“Where’s the rest of your company tonight?” You changed topics, careful not to tread too deeply. “Not like you to stag it.”

“On their way. I’d give them about ten minutes, then I’ll worry.” He assured you. “Maybe I just wanted you all to myself for a night.” He posed the theory as if he had never divulged in the glory of seclusion with you. You ignored him, unwilling to admit that you didn’t mind him on his lonesome.

“What can I get for you, darlin’?” You asked, barely looking up from your hands.

“Whiskey, top shelf. You can pick.” The voice rang through you as if it was blessed with the grace of god himself, settling in your chest and warming your soul. You finally broke your focus from your lime cutting, curious to see if the face matched the beauty of the voice. As if it were some kind of sick joke, the sight of his face seemed even more heavenly than the sweet tone of his words. “Only a couple ice cubes, though. Don’t want to water it down too much.”

“Top shelf?” You asked for clarification. Normally, nobody even eyed the liquor that far up in fear that it would break the bank.

“Price doesn’t matter, sweetheart. Quality does.” As beautiful as he was, he did seem a tad cocky. You supposed you could brush it to the side unless it became a real problem. You scooped a few ice cubes into the cup, turning to the wall of liquor to pick his poison. You used the step stool to reach for a bottle on the far left. You brought it down with caution, returning to him with a raised eyebrow. He glanced at the label and gave a nod of approval.

“Single?”

“Always a double.” You could hear a smile hidden in his tone. You poured the whiskey over the ice, the crackle striking him with curiosity. “Ice usually goes in last, does it not?”

“Been doing this a long time,” you chuckled “tastes better this way.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” He hummed. As you turned to place the bottle back in its original place, you could feel his eyes burning into you. When you turned back to him, your suspicion was confirmed. He seemed shameless about his unwavering stare. “Got anything to make it look pretty?” You let out a sigh, pondering what you could add to it. You pulled out a citrus twist, showing it to him. “Will it change the way it tastes?” He smirked.

“Unless you’re planning on eating it, no.” You teased, garnishing the rim with it. “Probably wouldn’t be very pleasant if you did.” You passed it to him, smiling at the peculiar interaction.

“That smile will make it taste even better, though.” He noted, eyes still glued to you. “What’s your name, sweetheart?”

“Y/n,” you said, feeling a hint of a blush plaster your cheeks. “What about you? Never seen you around here before.”

“Sweetheart suits you better.” He noted. “I’m Jake.” He replied, taking a sip of the beverage. He gave a nod of approval paired with a little smile, one that stole the air straight from your lungs. “Just moved here, thought I’d check the place out.”

“Satisfied so far?” You weren’t shy in admitting your question was laced with filthy undertones. You were certain you would let him take you right then and there with no guilt at all. He was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and his interest in you was very apparent.

“Incredibly,” he let out a small laugh. “What about you, trouble?”

“What about me?” You shot back, thankful that the bar was nearly empty. You thought it would be worse than torture, having to cut your conversation with him short.

“Are you satisfied, sweetheart?”

Jake was the devil in disguise, and that you were certain of. His charm was like no other, but his intentions were his downfall. He would do anything for a night of fun, but that’s where his involvement ended. He was quick with a joke, always trying for a laugh. Compliments were steadily flowing, and his gaze was always the same; attempting to undress you with his eyes alone. You were sure Jake could make a great friend if you allowed him to get that close, but it was much too risky for you to entertain. You had fallen victim to him once, and had never fully recovered. To step in time with him was assurance of certain death, and that was something you could never forget. Although beautiful, his love was not something desirable. Despite knowing that, you seemed desperate to convince yourself of the fact every time you were near him.

“Aren’t you always trying to get me alone?” You chuckled, hearing the door chime once more.

“Always trying, never succeeding.” He shrugged, taking a long drink from his cup. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”

“I wonder why that is, Jacob.” You rolled your eyes. The conversation came to a halt as soon as the words left your mouth. Danny, Josh and Sam had joined you two at the bar, taking a seat beside their brother while still amidst their own conversation.

“I wonder, too.” Jake said, always needing to get the last word in. You clenched your jaw, already finding yourself annoyed with him despite only being in his company for a short time.

“That’s it, beautiful. Just like that.” His desperation was evident, heavy breathing sounding through the room and staining the walls with sin. It was a sin you would never be able to forgive yourself for, one that was made in a moment of weakness and left an air of suffering in its wake. “Does that feel good?” His fingers were knotted in your hair, laced around the strands like a snake settling in for a kill. No verbal response could compare to the vulgarity of your moans. “Tell me how good it feels, baby.”

You broke your stare from his face, feeling a wave of indignation washing over you at the vile memory. It was something that plagued you, seeming to poison every pleasant thought and ruin it indefinitely. To him, it seemed like a typical Sunday afternoon activity. Jake was always dripping with sex appeal, and sex was his favourite pastime. It was a horrendous pairing of traits. He had no remorse for his actions, none at all for making you fall for him and then disappearing as if he never existed at all. You were a one night stand, and he left your apartment that night with no intent of ever speaking to you again. You were a fool for him, in love by the first touch, and you were nothing more than a conquest to him, a challenge with little significance, and you were one he proved so easily forgettable.

You never wanted to see him again, almost happy he had vanished after the initial shock wore off. You vowed if you were to see him again, you wouldn’t even cast a glance in his direction. You did well; the first few times he came back around the bar you barely even acknowledged his existence. That struck a nerve in him you didn’t even realize he could have. Emotion was very low on Jake’s list of priorities, but you seemed to invoke every single one in him. It bothered him so much that he refused to return to the bar you worked at for many months in fear of facing rejection again. He avoided you just long enough for you to meet a fantastic person, one who seemed very willing to give you the love you were looking for. One that found himself sitting in the same bar seat Jake had once sat, staring just as longingly at you as Jake did. This time, the patron was in it for more than a hookup, and had fallen for you far beyond anything Jake could ever comprehend feeling.

It was fantastic; a dream come true, even. Someone who loved in the same way you did, adorned the same outlook on life, and had the same morals and passions. It was so fantastic that it seemed too good to be true. “Hey, beautiful.” Danny leaned over the counter, placing a kiss to your cheek as you sat a beer bottle in front of him. “I missed you.”

Correction: it was too good to be true.

“I missed you.” You smiled, eyes fluttering closed at the feeling.

“Ten more minutes and you can join us on the other side.” Sam joked, eyeing the clock.

“Oh, I know. I’ve been counting the seconds.”

Jake had done such a good job at disappearing that he had dug his own grave. Instead of mustering the courage to confront you, to apologize and make amends for his actions, he gave you ample opportunity to fall in love with his best friend. As if it was some type of sick joke, a repercussion for the sins you committed with him, you had no idea that they were so close until it was far too late. You were already falling fast for the curly haired boy who appeared to be the exact opposite of Jake Kiszka. You were so desperate to purge Jake from your life that you failed to realize Danny was a sure way to allow him right back in.

“My friends are gonna join me, tonight. Is that okay?” Danny was nervous, that much was obvious. But, he was cute when he was nervous, and you couldn’t imagine why meeting his friends would cause any kind of problem.

“F’course it is, handsome.” You smiled, handing a bottle to him after ridding it if the cap. “You know, draft would be much cheaper. And better for the environment.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he smiled, finding it impossible to stop admiring you. “They can be a lot, sometimes. I just don’t want them to scare you away.” He chuckled.

“I like you, Daniel. I’m dating you because I like you, not because of your friends. Besides, crazy never really bothered me much. I work at a bar, so I’m sure I’ve met worse.” He laughed, nodding along to your words.

“Suppose I can’t argue that.” He agreed. “If you like them, we can properly hang out sometime. I just thought that if you didn’t, you could pretend to be busy with something else.”

“Thoughtful, but not necessary. I’m sure I’ll love them.” You leaned over and placed a kiss to his cheek. “You worry too much.”

“I like you, what can I say?” He smiled, appreciative of your attitude. “Plus, they keep pestering me about coming here all the time. Figured I couldn’t keep you a secret much longer.”

“Oh, so I’m a secret?” You teased, sending him a wink.

“Not like that,” he rolled his eyes, but he was laughing as he did so. “If I could, I’d keep you all to myself for the rest of my life. What if you like one of them more than me?”

“Impossible.” You assured him, sending look of finality to show him you were serious. “I’m going to clean off the booths, give me a shout when they get here, okay?”

“For a kiss,” he smirked.

“That just comes with the service.” You giggled, leaning forward and capturing him in a moment of sweetness. “That better not count as my tip.” You joked as you pulled away.

“I’ll give that to you after work.” He assured you as you shuffled out from behind the counter.

“I’m counting on it!” You replied, already busying yourself with clearing away empty bottles and glasses. By the time you finished the line of booths, your tray was full to the brim. You hummed along to the music playing over the sound system as you returned to your post, barely noticing your surroundings as you discarded the tray full of clutter. When you swung around, you noticed there were more people at the bar than there were previously. Danny had a smile stuck on his lips as he found himself in mindless conversation with his company. You even found yourself smiling, too, looking over the new faces in attempt to familiarize yourself with them.

The first two looked strikingly familiar, both showcasing features that were not only perfectly suited for their face, but also had an air of similarity. You figured they must be brothers. You and Danny had yet to discuss much other than each other, as the relationship was quite new. You were certain in its strength, but meeting friends was a huge step forward in the process of loving each other. You didn’t stare for too long, realizing that there was another friend you had yet to see. Your head turned down the line of boys, landing on someone who had already made quick work at staring at you. Your stomach dropped, quickly understanding the reason for the other boy’s familiarity. You felt like the ground was stolen from underneath you, that the universe was wrapping its cold fingers around your neck and slowly strangling the life from you. Your palms were sweaty, head spinning with no sign of stopping.

“Remember my order, sweetheart?” He murmured, glancing to his side to make sure Danny hadn’t noticed your volatile reaction.

“Of course I do.” Your words were paired with a scowl, at a loss for ideas on how to dig yourself out of the hole you were in.

You threw your apron in the laundry bin, counting out the cash tips to mark them down in the book. Once it was recorded, you let your hair down from its elastic, running your fingers through the mess of knots the nights stress had created. Once you were able to rid yourself of the aura of darkness that was looming over your head, you managed to force yourself back out into the bar. The noise was immediately overwhelming, seemingly much louder now that you were on the other side of the counter. “Whiskey sour, please.” You gave your coworker a smile, silently thanking them for showing up on time.

“You staying?” He asked, immediately springing to action at your words.

“Guess so.” You sighed, placing the change on the counter. “As if I’m not here enough.” You grumbled. “Danny thinks we should spend our free time here, too.”

“At least try to have fun,” he laughed at your grim expression. As soon as the drink was in front of you, you took a long sip.

“You too.” You chuckled, turning your head to scan the crowd. You noticed that the boys had claimed a booth in your time away, settling in with little hesitation. You walked over, grabbing a chair from a table and placing it at the end of the booth.

It had been years since you and Danny had started dating, and it had been phenomenal. You didn’t have a single complaint aside from Jake, and neither did he. A year or so prior, you had even moved in together. You adored him, and he was your whole world. You had no doubt in choosing him as a life partner, but you did wish that you had never given in to the temptation of Jake. Because even years later, he still looked at you the same way he did that first night he showed up at the bar. Even with no hint of success, or an idea that he would ever have you like that again. He was relentless, and it was excruciating.

Even as in love with Danny as you were, you couldn’t lie and say that Jake was not attractive. You had fallen into bed with him once, and for good reason. You had no desire to be with him, no need for him in any way that mattered, but he was like a parasite, begging to leech life directly from the source. He flirted as if you weren’t practically married to his best friend, as if he didn’t care about hurting him in the crossfire. You shot him down most of the time, but even the best of people had their moments of weakness. There were some nights, albeit few and far between, that you found yourself tipsy enough to entertain him for a moment before the crushing guilt took over.

Danny was not ignorant to what happened between you and Jake. In fact, he was quite aware of Jake’s intense infatuation with you. It would be untruthful to say that it never caused any issues, but there was no world in which it wouldn’t. Danny was quite trusting in you, confident in your love and knew you respected him enough to never stray. That was wholeheartedly true, and being unfaithful to him was never a thought that crossed your mind. Sex with Jake, even as mind blowing as you knew it was, was not worth risking a lifetime of love with Danny. It was futile, and you knew that one night with Jake would always be just that. He hated the thought of commitment, and would never settle down. It was not worth losing everything that Danny gave to you.

“We have to tell him!” You spat, palms landing flat on his chest and pushing him backwards. You were not one for physical violence, but Jake always seemed to bring out the worst in you.

“Fine, then tell him!” He barked back, neither of you caring about your volume or presentability. “Why does it have to fall on me?”

“Because you’re the one who started it! You finally got me to have sex with you, and then you left! You disappeared! You got what you wanted, like always, and now look at the problems it caused!” You exploded. “I’m not risking losing him over someone like you.”

“Someone like me?” He chuckled, looking at you with a fierce shield of carelessness, as if your words hadn’t cut him deeper than a knife. “Fine, we’ll tell him. I’ll go in there and tell him just how good you look from behind, or how beautiful those slutty little noises sound, especially when my name was stuck on those pretty lips. I’m sure he’d love to hear about all of that.” He smirked, lighting a fire in you like no other.

“Fine, I’ll go in there and tell him how you spent weeks getting me to fall for you. Came in here every night so desperate for attention that you couldn’t leave until we kicked you out. You wanted me so bad that you drank us out of liquor, and when you finally had me, you broke my fucking heart. Would you like me to tell your brothers, too? ‘Cause I can talk all night about how terrible of a person you are.” His eyes changed; the defensive nature he previously held was obsolete. He knew he had done wrong, but he had no idea how badly he truly hurt you. He was at a loss for words, so he said the only thing he believed held any meaning.

“I’m sorry.” He muttered. The cold air of the night was nipping at the tip of your nose, but the wind hitting you was unable to compete with the slap of his pathetic apology.

“Fuck you, Jake.” You shook your head, grimacing at the thought of him being apologetic about his actions. “I’m telling him. I really like him, and he deserves the truth. Dishonesty isn’t really my thing, even if it is yours.”

And tell him, you did. It was a tearful confession, an admission of guilt for something you didn’t really need to be ashamed of. He was almost too understanding, showering you with comfort when you felt like he should have walked out. It did sting for him to hear, but he was not willing to blame you for a choice you made months before ever knowing him. His willingness to accept you as is was more than enough for you to fall in love with him. He appreciated the truth, and from there on you two had built a loving life with each other. The thought of Jake was less daunting and more manageable. For the first little while, Jake backed down with the understanding that he was in the wrong. He allowed you to live your life, pretending as if he never knew you until Danny introduced you to each other. It was the amicable thing to do, but unfortunately Jake had no idea how to maintain that outlook. It only took a few months before his insufferable personality made its inevitable return.

“You’re quiet, tonight.” Danny nudged you, sending a soft smile your way.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. It was a long shift. I’ve never seen it this busy in here.” You said, taking a long drink from your glass. It was nearing the end, and you were itching to go for another one, just to escape Jake’s burning stare for a moment.

“That’s okay,” he placed his hand on your knee under the table, sending a jolt of comfort through you. “We don’t have to stay out for long.”

“It’s okay,” you assured him, placing your hand atop of his. “We can do whatever. I’ll be happy as long as I’m with you.” He gave you a lingering stare, one that told you he felt the same way, but he wasn’t sure if he completely believed you.

You weren’t certain as to why Jake was bothering you so much more as of recent. Bothering was not the proper term, really. He never bothered you; his advances were not uncomfortable or troublesome. Infuriating by times, yes, but he was harmless in every sense of the word. He was affecting you more, and that was a strange feeling. You had spent the last few years managing to ignore almost every sly pass or risky comment. It had become routine, Jake capturing you in a moment of seclusion and doing his best to make your loyalty falter. It was always the same story; a few eye rolls, a scoff, and maybe even a playful shove that had incredible amounts of hidden frustration behind it. Jake was the master at flirtation, and you had mastered rejection. It grew increasingly easier over time, and now it was barely a chip off your shoulder. The beginning proved tough, but you persevered to a point where it barely bothered you in any way that mattered. Lately, it seemed like it was more impactful than your typical game of cat and mouse. His touches held more emotion, lingering for a moment too long. His eyes held unspoken words, and his moves were no longer meant to maim; they were aimed to kill.

You found yourself playing into him more, entertaining the idea before ultimately shutting it down after the crushing guilt took over. You would never do that again, and even more so, you would never do that to Danny. You repeated the mantra in your head until the words seemed to bleed from the walls. As firm as you were on your stance, Jake had a devastatingly intoxicating attitude, and you weren’t a stranger to his temptation even long after his initial strike all of those years ago.

“Making drinks even on your days off?” The dulcet tone caught your attention, unexpected and causing you to stutter with your movements. The bottle of vodka moved off target and caused a small spill on the table. You didn’t look up to the perpetrator, no need to see him to know who it was.

“You know me, live to work instead of work to live.” You chuckled. It was true; you were so invested in working that a social life had never been a priority for you. Money was a wicked motivator, and even if the bar was not typically bustling, your regulars were quite generous with their tips. You’d been working at the same bar since you had moved out of your parents house and you had no imminent plans to leave. The owners were nice, they had given you a promise of a manger’s position if you ever wanted it, and you thoroughly enjoyed your coworkers company. The wages weren’t awful and the tips were great. You saw no issue with working, and made it a point to do it as much as you could.

“Makes me think that you don’t want to be at home.” Jake theorized, taking a step closer to you as you swiped away the spilled alcohol. “Is everything as fantastic as you make it seem, or is being tied down not all it’s cracked up to be?” He was beside you, now. His charm was radiating from him, inviting you in without you even noticing how badly it burned. You could feel the warmth from his body slowly surrounding you, a feeling that you hadn’t experienced in a long time. You finally looked towards him, trying to maintain some semblance of passiveness with his advance.

“I’m quite content, Jacob.” You said, holding his stare with no intention of backing down. “Makes me think that you’re projecting.” He let out a chuckle, shaking his head at your need to argue.

“Was just a thought, sweetheart.” He looked towards the table. “Is it such a terrible thing to be worried about a friend?”

“Considering you and I are far from friends, and I know you’re not worried about anything other than sex, yeah.” You also looked to the table, pouring the mix into the three glasses before you. You placed straws in each of them, giving a slight stir as you did.

“I didn’t know it was a crime to enjoy sex.” He shrugged, a smirk toying at his lips.

“It’s not. Think lots of people do.” You snipped, looking towards him. “It’s a crime to want it from your best friends girlfriend.” He chuckled, shamelessly enjoying the fire in your tone.

“Not if I had you first,” he reminded, thrilled by the shift in your expression. Talk of what came before Danny had been strictly forbidden, and you both had done well adhering to it after the initial blowout of the truth. His hand slipped to your waist, fingers dangerously dancing close to parts of you he was no longer allowed access to. The tips of his fingers settled just near your ass; not close enough for an offence, but clearly toying the line between right and wrong.

“That never happened, Jake. Remember?” You prompted him to recall the harsh boundaries you had put in place months prior.

“Oh, I remember,” he smiled, pulling you in to him a little closer. “I think about it all of the time. How could I forget?” It was clear that the two of you were not speaking about the same memory. There was no space left between your bodies, your chest pressed to his and his lips hovering over your own. “Do you remember?”

“Jake,” you warned, knowing that this was far beyond any level of comfort for anyone. He was pushing every possible boundary, and you weren’t sure if it was because he wanted you, or if he just wanted to see you crack under the pressure. Most of the time, anything Jake did seemed more like a punishment or a test rather than anything positive. You wanted to believe he was genuine, but you knew him to be sly and willing to do whatever it took to get what he wanted. You could feel him pulling you in despite both of you being as still as possible. It was just how he was; his eyes were inviting, as was every other physical aspect of him. The only deterrent was his personality, and even that wasn’t completely horrible by times. But it was a trick, as it always was, and as much as your body wanted to fall for it, you knew it was more than wrong. It was despicable.

When his nose was touching yours, brushing together with a million sparks of electricity, you finally came back to reality. You raised your hand, pressing it flat to his chest and pushed him backwards. You were livid at yourself for allowing him to get so close, but even angrier at him for trying so hard to make you fall for it. “What’s wrong, sunshine?” He smiled. The air was still laced with notes of whiskey. It radiated off him as if he used it as holy water. At one time, the scent was alluring, deadly when mixed with his cologne. Now, it seemed repulsive. “Not even once, for old times sake?”

“Never again.” You snapped, unwilling to believe that he truly thought you would agree to his request. “You’re hammered.” You noted, feeling the choke of tears in your throat. “Go home.” The regret for even allowing him near you was debilitating.

“All alone?” The smirk he held was infuriating.

“Go home, Jake.” A third voice broke through the tension in the air. You both turned to the entryway of the kitchen, seeing Danny standing with his arms crossed. He didn’t seem angry, more like he just wanted to put an end to the chaos and move on. Jake raised his hands in surrender, casting one more sideways glance at you before shuffling towards the door.

Sam sat a third drink in front of you, prompting you to utter a small thank you for his kind gesture. You were already tipsy, before you even joined them for a drink you could feel your head swirling from exhaustion. Alcohol certainly did not help you wake up, nor did it help the incessant memories from the past. You wasted no time bringing the straw to your lips in attempt to wash down the bitter aftertaste of remembering. You closed your eyes, desperate to focus on anything other than the ache of knowing Jake in any other way than surface level. Even the burn of the whiskey was preferable to the burn of him.

“Maybe you should slow down, baby.” The concerned tone was less of a comfort and more like a stab to an already open wound. You set the glass back on the table, eyes flickering to your boyfriend. You bit the inside of your lip, trying to focus on him and him alone. You could feel Jakes eyes searing into the back of your skull, begging you to look at him instead. Had it been a battle for affection, a challenge of courtship, you could be more sympathetic for the boy, but everyone was painfully aware that Jake was not after you with intentions of marrying. Sure, he liked you, but it was in a way that only Jake could comprehend. To everyone else, it seemed like he viewed you as a conquest, thinking he would have gratification like no other if he was able to steal you back for just one more night. It was vile, and no matter how much you tried to stop it, it only seemed like he was even more mesmerized by you.

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry.” You nodded, fidgeting with your hands on your lap. You looked guilty, even if you had nothing to be guilty about. There was never an instance between you and Jake that Danny was unaware of. He was the first to know, and he knew it all. Perhaps your guilt was not accredited to your night spent with Jake, but rather your deepest desire for the chance again. It was horrendous to even consider it, but Jake was unlike anyone else. Again, you had no desire to be with him in any way that mattered, and in truth, sex did not necessarily matter. At least, not in any way worthwhile. You knew that you were undeniably attracted to Jake, and you likely would jump at the opportunity to have sex with him again, as long as it didn’t hurt anyone else. Knowing that it was implausible to invite Jake in without disaster, you shoved that idea as far down as humanly possible. For a long time, it never seemed to resurface, but every time he attempted to ignite the old flame, it seemed to push forward a little more. Tonight, it was impossible to ignore.

By times it seemed like guilt was the only emotion you knew how to feel. Guilt for past mistakes before Danny ever came in to your life, and for being in his life after said mistake. Guilt for giving into his temptation, even if it was just slightly, and even more so for rejecting him while knowing you would accept if the circumstance were different. There was no possibility you could bring the idea up to your boyfriend, and you weren’t sure if you even wanted to. The desire was strong, but not nearly enough to risk losing everything. Instead, you opted to suffer in silence. It was always better that way, anyway. A problem could only be true once it was spoken into existence.

You knew you were incorrect about all of your conclusions, but you chose to continue on the path, anyway. It didn’t matter if you kept it silent; Jake Kiszka was very much a problem, and that would never go away unless it was dealt with directly.

Perhaps it was the decade of friendship that made the predicament so troublesome. You would never bring the situation to an ultimatum, mostly because it was wrong to make him choose between you two, but a small part of you was afraid that you would not win that battle. Your relationship was strong, and had been since the very beginning, but you were unsure if you could compete with a lifetime of friendship, nor the bandmate bond. Jake was going to be a part of Danny’s life indefinitely, and not just in a social setting. They were family, coworkers, and friends. You knew that if you wanted to be in his, too, you would have to learn how to cope with the reality.

“You okay, trouble?” Josh smiled, pointing his gaze at you. You gave a nod, trying to look as pleasant as possible. Even the sound of the nickname made your stomach churn, even if Josh used it in a much better way than his brother did.

“Oh, yeah. Think I just need to get out of the work zone and into the fun one.” You chuckled.

“So what’s with that, anyway?” You asked, handing the whiskey glass to the boy in hopes that you would be lucky enough to brush fingers with him. Any contact was worth the world, even if it was minuscule.

“What?” Jake grinned, doing just as you hoped he would. As he received the glass, he let his fingers rest on yours for just a second too long.

“Why do you call me trouble?” You laughed, unsure of where his nickname originated.

“Oh, I forgot your name. Had to think of something on the spot.” He joked, taking a sip of his drink and watching for a reaction. You rolled your eyes, knowing very well that it was a lie. “You’re gonna make me say it, aren’t you?” He sighed, leaning in a little closer.

“I would appreciate it.” You gave him a sweet smile, coaxing the answer from him.

“It’s my indirect way of saying I like you, sweetheart.” He hummed, eyes never leaving your face. He was revelling in the blush that dusted your cheeks. “Plus, a girl as beautiful as you is nothing but trouble.”

“Don’t flatter me, Jacob.” You brushed him off, but felt yourself leaning closer to him over the bar top.

“But it’s my favourite thing to do.”

“I’m going to grab another drink.” You announced, standing as you looked over the table. “Anyone else?” All of the boys put in their orders, thanking you for the offer. Just as you were about to turn, Jake stood, too.

“You’ll need someone to help carry them,” he said in response to your pointed stare. Without argument or agreement, you turned and walked towards the bar. You didn’t have to see him to know he was following; you could feel it. You took post at the bar, waiting for the bartenders to come to you. Jake joined you, wasting no time placing a light hand on your back. “What’s bothering you, sweetheart?” He asked, voice low enough so only you could hear him.

“I’m just peachy, Jake. No need to worry.” You grumbled, pulling out your card to pay for the order.

“For some reason, I don’t think that’s true.” He also pulled out his wallet, ready to race you for the bill. “Usually you already would have threatened to throw a drink at me. Tonight, you won’t even look at me.”

“It would be a waste of a perfectly good drink.” Your response was short and sweet, clearly showcasing your desire to end the conversation.

“Have I got you that bothered, tonight?” You could hear the smirk in his tone before you even looked at him.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you scoffed, finally looking over to meet his eyes. The sight of his face was enough to make your heart skip a beat, so beautiful that it was almost haunting. The parallels of the two universes were debilitating when you thought about them for too long; one in which Jake would trip over himself to flatter you, and one where you would kick him to the ground before he could try.

“Don’t have to; you do that for me.” His smirk turned into a smile, his hand still lingering on your lower back.

“How many times do I have to tell you this is never going to happen?” You sighed.

“When you actually mean it.” He chirped back, wasting no time.

“I think I’ve been pretty clear.” You argued. “You know, like the the million other times I’ve told you.”

“Right,” he nodded, but mischief was dancing in his eyes. “So you don’t like it when I stop by to see you before everyone else? Or when I tell you how pretty you look?” He chuckled, already knowing the answer. “I think that you do like it, just not when Danny’s around.” And he was correct, as disgusting as it was. You had said a million times that you didn’t care for his antics, but he could see the dishonesty as if it were written all over you and stamped on your forehead in big, red letters.

“I think that you should learn how to listen, Jacob.” Even as you spoke, you could feel yourself leaning into his side ever so slightly, wordlessly inviting his attention and touch.

“I’m listening, y/n.” He assured you, mouth leaning in closer to your ear. You were enveloped in a cloud of alcohol, both of your inhibitions lowered and the primal pleasure from the touch was undeniable. “I’ll listen to you all night, if you’ll let me, but I don’t think you’ll be doing much talking.”

“Jake, I’m in love with your best friend.” You reminded.

“I’m not asking you to be in love with me.” He said, lips barely hovering over your ear now.

“This is wrong. You have to stop.” You muttered, but the warning was feeble, barely any strength behind it. He had finally gotten ahead, and he was relishing in his victory. “He’s your best friend, Jake. This is despicable.”

“Fine,” he seemed like he was going to bargain, but knowing Jake, his bargain was not worth the time or energy. “If you won’t let me take you home, you can go over there and bat your eyes, give him a sweet little smile, and ask him if he’ll let me join.” The idea struck you like a blow to the gut, settling in your bones and engulfing any existing thought in your brain. It seeped under your skin and into your veins like poison, diluting any healthy rationale and suffocating any moral. You had been so volatile at the thought of Jake that it had never even crossed your mind to think of that possibility. He could see it in your eyes, the flash of excitement at the suggestion. “See? I knew you didn’t mean it, trouble.” He tightened his grip on you slightly as he watched the elation deflate from your eye. He wasn’t suggesting it, he was only offering the idea to prove his point. “You want me, but you don’t want to hurt him.”

“Yeah, because the only use I have for you is sex. I’m in love with him.” You snapped, furious that he had played you in such a way.

“That’s all I wanted to hear, sweetheart.” He grinned. “But, if you do want to ask him, I don’t mind sharing.” He hummed. “I’d do anything to have you, again.”

“Fuck you,” you brushed off his comment, turning to the bartender and ordering the list of drinks that the others had requested.

“You’d like to,” he teased, paying for the order before you could even think of doing so. He gave you one last smile before grabbing two glasses from the counter and making his way over to the table. You tried to satiate the bubble of anger as you waited for the rest of your order, but it proved nearly impossible. You walked back to the table with a sour taste in your mouth and an overwhelming urge to go home. Worse than anything else, when you returned, the distant pained look in Danny’s eye made the interaction all the more disturbing. He knew, like always, and there was no way to hide it. When you looked to him, he averted his gaze towards Sam, who was sitting on the other side of him.

“I don’t know what to say, Danny!” You exploded, tears prickling your eyes. “I love you, and I want to be with you. Always have, and I’ve known that from the minute I met you.”

“I feel that way too, so I just don’t understand what’s so special about Jake! If you want to be with me, and you love me so much, why does it seem like you cling to the attention from him?” He ran a hand through his hair, not wanting to be upset with you but having no other way to express his feelings.

“If I could have it my way, I’d never speak to him again! I never wanted to, and then I started dating you and he magically appeared!” You tried to word your frustration as best you could. “I’m not trying to entertain him, but it gets a little hard to ignore him when he’s always around and doesn’t want to leave me alone!” You took a seat beside him at the table, silently begging him to look at you. “Danny, you have to know that I would never do that to you.”

“I know!” He snapped, causing you to recoil from the harshness. He finally looked up at you, remorse evident in his eyes. “I’m sorry, y/n. I know you wouldn’t.” He assured you. “Do you have feelings for him?”

“No, baby.” You reached out for his hand. It was not a lie; you did not have any romantic feelings or anything of the sorts when it came to Jake. You were attracted to him, and you knew that he knew as much. You didn’t have to remind him. “I only feel that way for you.” You assured him.

“It’s just hard, y/n. He looks at you sometimes and I wonder… I just wonder when the day will come when he finally grows up and realizes that he wants to settle down, because I know you’ll be the only person he’s looking at.”

“Jake will never grow up.” You shut that idea down, both of you quickly realizing how blasphemous it sounded. “And it doesn’t matter if he’s looking at me, because I don’t want that with him. I had feelings for him a very long time ago, and he hurt me really bad. There’s no part of me that feels like that way for him, now. I fell in love with you, and fell for a reason. I want you to know that you’re the only one who has my heart.”

Danny was fidgeting with his hands, a sure sign that he was upset. You couldn’t blame him; if it were the other way around, you would be, too. You wished you knew how to ward off Jake for good, and in turn suffocate any of the remaining sexual desires for him. You hated that amidst the struggle, Danny felt hurt enough to doubt your love for him. Of all the things that you have felt, or imagined about Jake, they didn’t hold a candle to Danny. Under the table, you reached out for his knee. You rested your palm on his leg, thumb gently running over the fabric of his jeans. You could feel him relax under your touch almost immediately. His eyes flickered towards you, seeing the sincerity in your face almost immediately. He leaned back in the booth and slipped his hand atop of yours, a silent show of affection.

You motioned your head towards the door, pleading with him for a moment alone. He nodded, standing first and allowing you to lead the way. You both headed outside, hand in hand with no regard for anyone else at the table. When you broke out onto the patio, the cool evening stung your skin. You were almost nervous to look at him, unsure of what to say. “I know you’re attracted to him, y/n. It’s not a secret.” The words weighed you down as if you were buried in cement.

“I don’t love him, Danny.”

“No, but you do feel something for him.”

“Not in any way that matters.” You took a step towards the wooden fence of the entryway. He followed, looking down at you as he took your side. “Not in any way that compares to you.”

“I know.” He assured you. “Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.” He shrugged.

“I know.” You felt your chest ache at the proclamation of pain. That was something you never wanted to cause him. “I don’t know what to do. He’s… persistent.”

“Yeah, always been that way.” Danny explained. “Guess it didn’t matter as much before because I’ve never loved someone as much as I love you.” You looked to the ground, the weight of shame making it impossible for you to look at him. “Look, I’m not mad at you.” He said, his hand snaking around your waist. “I knew that this would always be an issue, but I love you enough to work through it.”

“I don’t think that’s fair, Danny.” You sighed, closing your eyes at the feeling of his touch. It was the most comforting thing to ever exist.

“Listen, you’ve never actually done anything with him, have you?”

“Of course not.” You shook your head, unable to imagine betraying him in such a way.

“He’s a dog, and I’m sure you know that. I’m not really worried that you’ll leave, or anything like that. I think maybe in the beginning I was, but I know that after this many years, if something was going to happen, it would have happened already.” He pulled you into him, allowing you to rest your head on his chest without actually having to turn to look at him. “I don’t think you slept with him and then got with me as revenge. If so, you’ve played a fantastic game.” He laughed, and you did too. “You’ve told him him to back off, and I have, too, but I don’t think he would have stuck with it if he didn’t believe there was a chance.” You closed your eyes, bracing for the impact of a breakup. You wouldn’t blame him if he did. “It’s okay to be attracted to him. You’re human, and it’s a normal human thing. I also know you enough to know that you wouldn’t have gotten with him at all if you never felt anything for him.”

“It doesn’t make it right.” You were fully willing to take blame, to understand that this was a despicable thing for you to be feeling.

“No, but what I’m saying is, I continued to date you knowing the history. Still do. You were always honest with me. You’ve never lied to me, and I respect that more than anything else. I see you two together; I know that spark is there. I’m not going to punish you for that because you’ve never tried to hide it or lie about it. It’s normal for you to be attracted to people, and it’s normal for me to be hurt about it. But I think our spark is a hell of a lot bigger, and I love you far too much to not try and work this out.” You finally felt a tear slip from your eye as you wrapped your arms around him.

“I wish I never met him. I wish I could have met you, first. I don’t want to feel this way.” Your words were muffled from your face being buried in his chest, but he got the message. He held you to him, placing a kiss to the top of your head.

“I know, and part of me does, too.” He whispered. You both sat there, holding each other in hopes that it would take all of the bad away. “I think that you need some sleep, because I can see how tired you are. We can figure out how to get through it, and I know we can, but it should be in the morning.” He said, cupping your cheek in his hand and guiding your head up to look at him. He swiped away the tears with his thumb, giving you a small smile to let you know he meant everything he said.

“I don’t deserve you.” You mumbled, completely lost in his eyes. The more you stared, the more things seemed to feel better. He was home, and he always would be. He was the love of your life, and you were more certain of that than anything else. “I’m sorry that I caused this. I wish I could go back in time and make some different decisions, maybe we wouldn’t be here.”

“Maybe I wouldn’t know you at all.” He theorized, and that was the worst thought of all. “It’s been four years, bug. We can make anything work. I know you love me, and I trust you; I always have.” he leaned down and placed a kiss on your lips, the feeling more soothing than any words shared.

“If it means I get to keep you, I’ll never look at him ever again.” You swore to it, knowing deep down that when it came to your relationship with Danny, you would go to the ends of the earth to salvage it.

“I don’t think we’ll have to go that far.” He chuckled, placing another kiss to your lips. “And you do deserve me. I know that you do, because after four years, you’ve never given in to him. If he flirted with me like that, I’m sure I would’ve cracked by now.” At the thought of it, you both dissolved into a fit of laughter. “Jake has always been Jake. I think he feels like he lost, and he never really got over it.”

“He did lose,” you laughed “if it were ever a competition between you two, he wouldn’t have even made it to the starting line.” You leaned up for another kiss as you finished, so incredibly grateful to have someone so understanding. Danny was the best in every sense of the word, and you had known that long before that night.

“I think after so long of you brushing it off and telling me it was okay, it was just routine. At first, him and I had plenty of words and none of them were polite. After a while, I saw that you could handle your own, and you always told me not to worry or fight with him. I trust you, but I probably shouldn’t have been so passive about it.” He explained. “If I ever thought he pushed it too far, or if he had made you uncomfortable, I would have killed him. Still would, actually. But you always seemed to laugh it off. Every time I mentioned it, you never seemed to care about him flirting, just about hurting me. I think we’ve all known for a long time, and I think that it just became so normal that we chose to ignore it.”

“Jake never bothered me.” You shrugged. “He’s harmless, and I know that. Think everyone else does, too. He just loves to flirt, and he loves attention. Sometimes, it’s actually kind of funny to see him try so hard and make a fool of himself. I care about Jake as a friend, and I do quite like him for company, but I guess I never wanted anyone to fight about it because I knew he could never be you. I think we all just let it go too far without talking about it.” You said, allowing your fingers to dance with his. Your eyes scanned his face, noticing how beautiful it looked in the dim moonlight. You felt stupid for ever having a shred of attraction for Jake, because Danny was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, inside and out. You had the world in your hands, and you took it for granted. “I never wanted to hurt you. I never want to hurt you. You’re the most important person in my life, and I love you with every ounce of my being.”

“I love you, and I know you love me. I know we love each other enough to make anything work.” You knew he was right, because there was nothing you wouldn’t do to keep him by your side.

“Thank you for being the best.” You whispered. “And for wanting to work it out. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“I know you will.” He placed a kiss to your head. “You don’t have to thank me for anything.” You rested in his arms for a moment, and the longer you spent there, the more things seemed to look up.

“I’m gonna head home. I think I need to go to bed.” You told him, pulling back slightly.

“Do you want me to come with you?” He said, looking down at you with concern.

“No, please stay and enjoy the rest of your night. I ruined it enough already.” You shook your head. “I’m just going to take a shower and go to sleep.”

“I’d enjoy it with you, too, you know. And you didn’t ruin anything.” He told you, looking more serious than he’d ever been.

“I know, baby.” You assured him. “I’ll be okay. Go in and have a few drinks, and have fun. I’ll be waiting for you when you’re ready to come to bed.” You smiled, standing on your tip-toes to place a kiss on his cheek. “I love you.”

“I love you.” He hummed, stealing one last kiss before you made your departure. “Call me if you need me, or even if you just want to say hi.”

“You know I will.” You gave his hand one last squeeze before taking a step away. He blew you a kiss before you turned out of sight, and as always, you pretended to catch it. He only went back inside once you were out of sight.

Luckily for you, your home wasn’t too far away from the bar. You normally walked to and from work, and it was almost your favourite part of the day. It allowed you a few moments of peace, and you could decompress from any of the day’s excitement. As you made your way down the street, you felt the weight on your shoulders lift. You felt better knowing that Danny was aware Jake was no more than a guilty pleasure, and that he was the love of your life. Part of you still felt dirty for even feeling as such, but the knowledge that you were both willing to work through it was more important than anything else. As you tumbled up your porch stairs, you wasted no time unlocking the door and bustling inside. You were eager for a shower to wash the stress of the day off, and your stomach was begging you for a bite to eat.

You kicked your shoes off and immediately went to the kitchen. You rustled around in the fridge before you found leftovers from last night’s dinner. As you warmed it up, you unbuttoned your jeans and slipped out of them. You placed them on the back of a chair and made a mental note to throw them in the laundry basket later. You ate in silence, enjoying the sound of nothing after hearing the constant buzz of a bar for hours on end. You threw your dishes in the sink and made your way upstairs to the bathroom. After you showered, you felt like a brand new person. You took extra time to do your skincare routine, and blow dried your hair before climbing into bed. The sheets were welcoming, still lingering with the scent of Danny’s cologne. When you nestled your head in the pillows, you were surrounded by the smell of his shampoo. It was the epitome of comfort, and you wished you never had to leave. It didn’t take too long until your eyes grew heavy, and the thought of sleep was too tempting to resist. You pulled the blankets up to your chin and drifted off into a slumber.

When you woke, it was still dark outside and the bed was still very much empty. You thought it was strange, figuring Danny would be back and asleep long before then. You rubbed your eyes, looking to the alarm clock on your beside and noticing that it was well into the night, now. You figured that Danny was the safest with his brothers, and you need not worry about someone over a foot taller and much stronger than you. You were about to close your eyes and fall back to sleep, but you heard the distant shutting of a door and muted chatter. Danny must have invited the boys over, which he so often did. You figured now that he was home safe, you could sleep soundly.

You settled back into the pillows, lax against the mattress and welcoming of any slumber that was willing to come to you. The sound of the same chatter began to fill the hallway, striking you as something even more strange. If you were sleeping, Danny aimed to keep the house as quiet as possible. It was unlike him to be speaking so loudly, especially so close to the bedroom. You sat up again, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Before you could even think to speak, or stand and confront the disturbance, the door of the bedroom creaked open. The chatter was obsolete, now, and the hallway light pooled in through the opening. You saw Danny, immediately prompting a smile on your face. Once he saw you were awake, he took a step inside. “Hi baby.” You crooned, excited that he was home. He didn’t respond, just took another step further into the room.

Behind him was another body, one that you couldn’t recognize through the darkness. When he turned and the flash of light reflected off the walls just right, your stomach dropped. “Hello, trouble.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

“What’s…. What’s up?” You looked between the two boys, unsure of how to react to the situation.

“Mind if we turn a light on?” Jake asked. “Hard to see your beautiful face when it’s so dark in here.” The words settled in the pit of your stomach, making you unable to form a coherent response. Even in the simplicity of the statement, the tone of his voice alone sent a rush of arousal straight to your core. You were too close to sleep to have any inkling of right or wrong.

“Y-yeah,” you stuttered, looking to your boyfriend for an answer. Even in the minimal light, you could sense an air of mischief on his features. You shuffled around, searching blindly for the lamp on your nightstand. Once you located the switch, you flicked it on. A soft yellow hue decorated the walls, illuminating both boys in all of their beauty. “Better?”

“Much.” Jake smiled, but it was all but genuine. You weren’t sure if you were in a dream, mind crazed from the days whirlwind of events and fabricating some sort of twisted narrative that you wished was real. Although you seemed awake, the haze of dream and imagination nowhere in sight, the situation seemed too odd to be true. You watched the two, curious as to what they were doing, and even more so about what they were thinking. If you were in reality, they were acting more out of character than they ever had before. “Did you get some sleep, sweetheart?” Jake questioned, eyes lingering everywhere except for your own. He looked as if he was already imagining what lie beneath the mountain of blankets.

“Yeah,” you nodded, figuring the best way to find out what was happening was to play along.

“That’s good,” Jake nodded, looking to his counterpart. “You’re definitely going to need it. Long night ahead.” He gave another smile, but this one radiated excitement. You looked to Danny, silently pleading with him for an answer.

“What?” Danny asked, tone only moderately harsh. You could tell the softness was dancing behind his eyes, waiting to be seen. “Isn’t this exactly what you wanted?” He took a step towards the bed.

“What is this?” You pried, unable to answer without more information.

“Come on, sweetheart. You’re smarter than that.” Jake urged you to answer your own question. You looked between them, studying each of their expressions for a moment. When you did, your eyes widened, mouth slightly agape in shock. You recognized both expressions far too well, and one was something you hadn’t seen in a very long time. “There you go.” Jake gave the small utter of praise, happy you were on the same page.

“I figured if you want him so bad, I’ll let you have him, but I’ve gotta have my fun, too.” Danny murmured, also looking at you with a hunger in his eyes you had only seen a few times. You were gazing at him in wonder, as if he’d given you the gift of life, unable to imagine a better way to rid yourself of the horrendous things you were feeling about Jake. “That sound okay to you, baby?” He asked, moving to your side. He looked down at you, the streak of dominance that he had a tendency for was incredibly apparent. As he waited for a reply, there was no doubt in your mind that he was more than serious. It was grievous, the fire dancing in his pupils. There would be no backtalk, no bargaining, nothing of the sorts. He was kind enough to let you have a taste of your own guilty pleasure, but it was under his authority. He was in charge, and you didn’t have the power to be anything other than obedient.

“Yes, daddy.” You spoke, in utter awe of the power he had over you. Jake looked to Danny, his expression showing nothing short of elation at the sound of your words. Danny took a glance over at him, a small smirk pulling at the corner of his lips. You could smell the alcohol from both of them, understanding that within their drunk ramblings, you must have came up in conversation. In attempt to settle the score, this was their conclusion.

“I told you.” Was all he said.

“Told him what?” You squeaked, almost embarrassed at your own willingness to submit to him.

“I told him all about you, baby.” He assured you. “Told him how well you listen, and all about how much of a whore you can be.” The ache between your legs was growing more intense by the second, still unable to comprehend the situation you had found yourself in. “But he’d know all about that, wouldn’t he?” His comment was snide, but you didn’t let it bother you. Your eyes flickered to Jake, a nervous jitter rushing through you. You were quite familiar with Danny’s character, and when the whole thing was over, he would go right back to the sweet boy you saw most of the time. He reached out, grabbing your chin in his hand and guiding you to look back at him. “I’m talking to you, not him.”

“Y-yes,” you nodded, agreeing with his statement. “He does.” You felt no shame in it, now. What was usually the elephant in the room was now nothing more than a driving force for the nights events.

“It was so good that you’re still thinking about it, yeah?” You nodded against the force of his hand, a small noise of confirmation sounding from your chest. “Better than I can make you feel?” He raised an eyebrow, but in no way were you willing to engage in his trap with both of them holding so much authority over you. “He’s going to get you off, and then we’ll see if you can give me an answer.” Your cheeks burned red, now nervous at the thought. You knew that Danny and Jake had likely discussed this in depth before coming home to you, but you weren’t sure if Danny really knew what he was getting himself into.

“I-I don’t-“

“What?” He snapped. “Been inviting him in for years, but now you’re too shy?” He taunted. “All talk, no action?” He could see the spark of indignation in your eye, happy that he’d pressed the right button. “Don’t worry, I’ll get my turn, too. So, you just keep your mouth shut and do as you’re fucking told.” He said, no debate about the matter.

“Okay,” you agreed, eyes never once straying from him. Although you had desperately wanted a moment like this with Jake, you still seemed to be plagued with guilt over the matter even with Danny’s explicit permission. He noticed it in your eyes as he moved to sit on the chair you had placed beside the bed. When you put it there for the intent of reading, you surely never thought it would be used for such a vulgar showing.

“It’s okay.” He assured you, his tone much softer than it was a moment before. “I’m okay.” You were both locked in a staring contest, but as he uttered the profession of comfortability, your worried gazed turned into a silent profession of love. Under the hard exterior, he let a loving smile peek through. You let out an exhale, content with knowing he was okay. With that, you turned to look at Jake, unable to deny the flutter of excitement in your belly. When he saw the hopeful gleam in your eyes, he couldn’t help but smile down at you, too.

“Never thought I’d get to see you like this again, trouble.” He stated, taking a step towards the edge of the bed. You sat patiently, waiting for an order from him. Although long ago, your night spent with him left you aware of his love for control, too. “Are you going to be good for me, too? Listen to me just like you do for him?”

“Yes, sir.” You nodded, entranced by the thought of him touching you again. He took a deep breath, the sound of the words washing over him like a shower of relief. He was more than thrilled that you had remembered him so well, thrilled that after so many years the experience for you was still so memorable in your mind.

“Come here, angel.” He beckoned you towards him, expecting immediate action. You slipped out from under the blanket, rising to your knees and moving towards him on the bed. When you were within arms reach, he cupped your cheek in his hand, peering down at you with adoration. He wasn’t shy to admit that he was elated to have you again. As much as his tirade was about mischief, the need to make you admit you wanted him, it also had a lot to do with his own need for you. He leaned down, wasting no time in pulling you into a kiss. It was hungry, desperate to make up for years of abstaining from the feeling. His other hand found your hip, fingers inching under the t-shirt that was covering you.

The sensation was unexplainable, the pleasure derived just from kissing him was overwhelming. Paired with the feeling of his hands on your skin, it was driving you insane. He used his wrist to hold up the fabric as his palm drifted towards your ass, he let his hand rest there, the cool metal of his ring he adorned on his finger sending a shiver through you. His grip was tight and showcased exactly how excited he was for the ability to have you again. He broke from you but didn’t move too far away. His nose was still ghosting over yours, almost as if he was scared you would disappear if he moved too far away. “Seems like you were waiting for us,” he noted, his finger slipping under the thin material of your underwear. “Were you hoping that we would come and take care of you?” He cooed, his sympathy clearly false as his lips drifted towards your jaw.

“G-god yes,” you let out a shaky sigh as his lips ghosted over your neck. He was making it a point to show you how well he remembered the sensitive spots, finding them with ease in hopes you might let a moan slip past your lips. He’d been yearning to hear it for so long that he wasn’t sure he could wait any longer.

“Let me take this off, angel.” He hummed, letting his hands snake under your shirt. As if the realization truly hit you as to what you were doing, you froze at the request, quickly looking to Danny with a hint of panic in your eye.

“It’s okay, baby.” He said, noticing your worry. He was sitting in the chair, observing the sight without a worry in the world. “This was my idea. I’ll tell you if I’m uncomfortable.” He said, hoping to crush your fear once and for all.

“Let me take care of you,” Jake said, also attempting to ease your worry. You looked back to him, giving a slight nod. With that, you allowed him to slip your shirt over your head. The cool air hit you immediately, but Jake was quick with his hands to warm you back up. His thumb brushed over your nipple, the light touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. “Do you know how long I’ve waited to see you like this?” He asked, taking a moment to admire the sight before him. You bit the inside of your lip, nervous about being on display for both boys at once. “It was terrible, only being able to dream about it.” He muttered, leaning forward for another kiss. Perhaps it was because of the incessant need for him that had been eating away at you for months, or maybe because you were finally realizing that he wanted you just as bad, but you were a mess before he even took your clothes off, and you were desperate for him to keep going. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth, gently biting down as his hand continued to explore your breast. The friction from the pad of his thumb was delightful, even if he was barely touching you. You let a small moan slip into his mouth, immediately sending him into euphoria.

“Did you miss me?” His fingers trailed down your torso, ticking the skin as he familiarized himself with you.

“Yeah,” you admitted, all sense of shame disappearing long ago. He moved back slightly, ridding himself of his shirt.

“Let’s get rid of these, okay?” His fingers slid under the side of your underwear, pulling it back and releasing his hold so it snapped back against your skin. You nodded, laying back on the bed and removing the flimsy fabric from your body. Jake moved towards the side of the bed, casting a sideways glance at Danny as he did so. “If you ask him nicely, do you think he’d give us some alone time?” Jake smirked, raising an eyebrow at you as he asked. “You always seem to get your way.”

“Watch it.” Danny warned, clearly not a fan of his joke.

“Just thought I’d try.” Jake said, brushing off the harsh reaction.

“Can’t perform under pressure?” The snide comment was used for show, Danny making it a point to let Jake know that he was not the one in charge of the situation.

“Feeling left out, Daniel?” Jake asked as he undid his belt buckle. “Jealous, maybe?”

“Haven’t really seen anything to be concerned about, yet.” The argument only proved that Jake was invited over solely for the sake of you. After four years of strictly monogamous dating, Danny never seemed to have an interest in sharing you with anybody. You knew he would never do anything that would put a strain on your relationship, or anything that he was blatantly uncomfortable with, but you were certain he was likely struggling a little bit with the situation. When you turned to look at him again, his eyes didn’t seem angry at all; he was relaxed, sitting as if this was a normal occurrence. You realized then that Danny wasn’t worried at all about competing with Jake, because he knew there was no need. He just wanted Jake to know that the situation was reliant on his generosity, and he could put an end to it if he wanted to do so.

When you looked back, the comment seemed to spark a flame in Jake’s eyes. One that spoke loudly about his love of competitive sport, and to him, this was exactly what the situation was. He opted not to respond, instead climbing into bed on the opposite side of you, ensuring Danny had a perfect view of what was coming next. You watched your boyfriend for a moment, searching for any signs of discomfort, but he was perfectly pleased with watching you fulfill your fantasy. You assumed it was because he knew that Jake would only have you for a moment, and he was promised a lifetime. Danny was never one for jealousy, and it was evident that not even in this situation did it bother him. The conversation you both shared earlier had allowed him to settle any fear and open his mind to possibility. Jake and Danny had shared an in depth discussion before even uttering the idea of him joining Danny. Rules, boundaries, and the knowledge that if someone was uncomfortable at any point, it would be over. The harmless banter was inevitable, but they were both on the same page; they were in it to please you, and that was it.

Jakes hand slipped between your legs, his fingers immediately running through your folds to gather the arousal he’d been causing you. As if it was something he did so often, something he knew so well, his fingers immediately found your clit. He traced circles into the sensitive bud, sending a rush of emotion through you. It had been so long that you had almost forgotten how fantastic it felt to be touched by him. He kept the pressure light, but his motion steady. He barely had to do anything to pry a moan from your lips. “Just like that?” He asked, looking over your face with a distant longing behind his eyes. “Does that feel good?”

“So good,” you breathed, eyes fluttering closed. You could feel his erection strained against his jeans, begging for any type of relief. You were eager to touch him, almost more so than you were for him to touch you. From what you remembered, Jake was not one to take things slow, but you wondered if he was pacing himself in fear of crossing any boundaries. He had spent years pining after you, always being shot down and eventually he had to understand that he would never get an opportunity to be with you again. Now that you were here, with his hands on you, and his name rolling so beautifully from your tongue, he wanted to savour it.

He increased the pressure, gaze never faltering in hopes to sear the memory into his brain forever. You let a gasp out, your hips raising from the bed to meet the movement of his thumb. He gave you a small smile, content at the reaction. “Give him a show, sweetheart. Make some noise, thank him for being so kind.” Jake purred, eyes flickering up to Danny for a moment. Your eyes followed the same direction, catching your boyfriends gaze just as Jake slipped a finger inside you. You held his stare, feeling a moan rise in your throat. You weren’t sure if it was from Jakes movement, or the carnal desire that was written all over Danny’s face. His jaw was hard set, chest heaving with his breath, but his eyes were not angry; they were half-lidded, clouded with enjoyment from the sight.

Jake gave a slight curl of his fingers as he began pumping them into you, his thumb drifting over your clit each time. The feeling was intense, only made worse when he leaned down to pull your nipple into his mouth. Your pleasure was impossible to hide, the work Jake was doing was intensified because you had the opportunity to watch Danny. With his eyes locked with yours, you felt a great need to reach out and touch him. You thought he looked quite lonely, and you were overwhelmed with the desire to have him, too. He noticed the look you were giving him, quite elated at the knowledge you still wanted him even with Jake so accessible to you. You saw him palm himself through his jeans, clearly worked up and desperate for relief, too.

Jake let his teeth sink into your nipple, just slight enough to catch you off guard. Although he would never admit it, he did feel a spark of jealousy upon noticing your disengagement from his actions. He sped his fingers, pulling you back into a cloud of euphoria. Your eyes fluttered closed, your head resting back on the pillow as your mind swirled with the threat of an orgasm. Abruptly, he stopped his movements, violently tearing you away from the dream-like state. You turned to look at him, barely catching his eye before he was slinking downwards on the bed. He settled between your legs, guiding one over his shoulder. You let a sigh of delight out as he brought his mouth to your cunt, running his tongue through you to get a taste of his own hard work.

“F-fuck,” you gasped, his tongue making quick work at circling your clit. Your hand instinctively reached for his hair, fingers tangling in the roots and giving a slight tug every time he hit a particularly pleasant spot. He added his fingers to you, resuming his earlier pace. You were thrown into a whole new dimension of bliss, already close to a climax with little effort. His tongue was just as devilish as his personality; every move was calculated, aimed for maximum impact. He was desperate to get you to an orgasm, needing it more than he needed water to survive. His own enjoyment was almost overshadowing yours, every now and again he would let out a moan against you just to show you how happy he was to be of service to you. “Jake, m’gonna cum.” You warned.

“Look at me.” Danny spoke, now. The order ran through you, his voice sending a new type of pleasure through you. You let your head fall to the side, more than willing to follow the order. The look of longing in his eyes was stronger than you’d ever seen from him before. It was strong enough that it immediately sent you over the edge upon noticing it. Your climax hit you hard, all of your muscles tensing as you let out a slur of moans and curses. The walls were decorated with your sounds of pleasure, the memory sinking into the foundation with intent to stay forever. The obscene display was almost too much for Danny to sit through, his need for you too great to be ignored.

“Taste even better than I remember, sweetheart.” Jake’s voice echoed in your ears, but you were too far gone to cognitively understand what he was saying. You barely had time to come down before Danny was on his feet, barking an order at Jake to get up.

Your head was spinning, trying to focus on something other than the residual energy of your orgasm pulsing through you. At Danny’s request, Jake stood without argument. Your orgasm was glistening on his chin, adorned like a trophy of his most proudest moment. Without another word, Danny stripped himself of his clothes and took the position that Jake had previously held. He wasted no time, immediately placing soft kisses to the inside of your thighs in attempt to convey his love for you. Danny was not jealous of Jake because he was pleasuring you; he was just eager to do it himself. “I told you I’d get my turn, baby.” He mumbled, lips still ghosting over your skin. Jake was watching you, almost seeming unsure of what to do with himself. “Do you want me, beautiful?” His fingertips grazed the outside of your thighs, selling on your hips in a firm hold.

“Yeah,” You nodded, reaching out to cup his cheek with your hand. You let your thumb drift over his cheek, showcasing the love you had for him in the small gesture. He turned his head slightly, placing a kiss to the pad of your thumb.

“I want to hear how bad you want it,” he muttered, his voice low and his order clear.

“Please, daddy. I need you. I need you so bad.” Your shameless begging was put to good use, as usual. Danny was always willing to give you what you wanted, but there was a few things he liked hearing. You were never one to deprive him of his desires, mostly because they were few and far between. He let out a hum of satisfaction, pleased at the sound of your words.

“Okay, baby.” He sighed, as if your begging was tireless and brutal. He was so quick to give in to you that it even bothered him, sometimes. “You know I’ll always give you what you want.” He was inches away from you now, so close that it was near painful to wait any longer. “But you have to take care of him, too, since he was so good to you.” Without looking up, Danny nodded his head towards Jake. The thought was thrilling, to be used by both boys however they wished. You thought that there was no better idea in the world. Your eyes fluttered towards Jake, looking expectedly at him, as if you were waiting for him to tell you what he wanted. The expression was crippling for him, the innocent aura engraved into your face tainted with your willingness to do whatever he pleased. “Show him what a good little whore you can be.”

“Yes, sir.” You breathed, nearly vibrating with excitement at the thought of Jake taking the rest of his clothes off.

“She always been this obedient?” Jake asked, a hint of humour in his tone.

“Took a while,” you could hear the smirk in Danny’s voice without even looking at him. “But I think it paid off.” You bit the inside of your lip, holding back any snide comments you wanted to convey about his jabs. You knew better, and in truth, he wasn’t lying. It was very rare for you to talk back in the bedroom, and even more so for you to contest his authority in any way. Danny was so kind and catering in every aspect of every day life, but during sex, his kindness was limited and his word was final. You learned quite quickly that if you chose to challenge him, it only made it harder for you to get what you wanted.

Jake hummed an agreement, an unspoken praise for Danny’s work. As he unbuttoned his jeans, Danny prompted you to shift closer to the edge of the bed. Jake kicked the rest of his clothes to the side, uncaring about where they landed. The sight of him naked began to form another knot in your belly, promoted without any touching at all. Jake was gorgeous, and it seemed like he had only gotten more so over the years. “Open,” he commanded, stepping closer to you. You did as he asked, turning your head to the side and opening your mouth, welcoming him to do as he wished. At the same time, Danny lowered his mouth to your cunt, resuming what Jake had been doing earlier. Jake wasted no time thrusting into your mouth, immediately letting out a hiss of pleasure. He started at a slow pace, not wanting to push you too far too soon. You let out a moan, muffled by his cock in your mouth. It was your way of telling both boys you were more than content with the current situation.

Danny slipped his fingers into you, curling them to hit the spot he’d grown so familiar with. Jake was phenomenal, but it was no comparison to your boyfriend. He had spent nearly half a decade memorizing every like and dislike, and undoubtedly had the power to bring you to an orgasm in seconds. Both sensations were equally intense, Danny’s tongue was focused intently on your clit and sending waves of pleasure through you, while the knowledge of pleasuring Jake was euphoric all on its own. Jake let out a groan, unashamedly admitting his enjoyment as he began to move his hips a bit faster. You closed your eyes, aiming to keep your breathing steady and your body relaxed.

“Fuck, y/n.” Jake hissed, his head falling back as he spoke. “Look so pretty with my cock in your mouth.” His words sent another rush of arousal through you, seeing every nerve on fire. The praise was heavenly, so good that you realized you could survive off the sound alone. The position you found yourself in was more than just unexpected, but something you never would have imagined possible. Although your processing of the information was difficult, it was incredibly welcomed. Just because you had never thought it possible did not mean you hadn’t dreamed of it a time or two. You almost felt in debt with Danny, knowing that his permission and kindness had given you something so fantastic. You weren’t sure if you could ever thank him enough.

You let out another strangled moan as Danny’s fingers hit the perfect spot, sending another wave of pleasure throughout your body. Paired with the feeling of his tongue, you were dangerously close to the edge once more. You couldn’t verbally warn him, but he knew the signs all too well. His fingers were searing into your hips, holding you to him as he let out a hum, just to let you know that he knew you were close. It was a permissive gesture; he had no intention of stopping or withholding anything from you. Jake was lost in his own world, barely able to comprehend the feeling of fucking you again, even if it was only your mouth. He was hoping you would finish soon, just so he wouldn’t have to pull away first. Danny felt you tense under his hold, now speeding his movements in hopes to bring you to an orgasm. Although he didn’t find himself jealous that Jake was touching you, he did find himself envious that he wasn’t the one behind the moans falling from your lips. He was eager to please you, wanting the gratification of your orgasm like he needed it to survive.

“Are you gonna cum, angel?” Jake managed the words out through gritted teeth, still blissfully lost in the feeling of your mouth. You looked up to him, both of you knowing that you couldn’t respond. He smiled down at you, liking it much better that way. Instead of tormenting you further, he continued to fuck your mouth so you couldn’t get the chance to speak. You watched his face, in awe at the beauty of his expression. Although the scene was far from graceful, he managed to encase gracefulness despite the lack of it within the room. You felt the knot in your belly tighten to a point of no return, and without further warning, another orgasm washed over you. Your muscles tensed as your eyes squeezed shut, and your moans, although silenced, filled the room. Both boys were elated at your performance and were more than ready to move on to the main event.

Jake pulled back from you, letting out a sigh of discontent at the loss of the feeling. “Good to know that you can use your mouth for more than just back talk.” His voice was hoarse, strained by his own need for you. He was eager to fuck you, so much so that he wasn’t sure how much longer he could wait.

“You want him to fuck you now, baby?” Danny asked, mouth still hovering over your cunt. If he could have his way, he’d stay between your legs all night. If it were any normal day, he would have. Your eyes flickered towards him, unsure of how to answer. “It’s okay, you can say it.” His gruff tone made him seem more confident than he truly was; in fact, this was the part he had been dreading all night. Everything that had happened so far was fine, and he was more than willing to admit that he didn’t mind sharing you at all. In the previous context, at least. He’d been struggling with the idea of Jake fucking you, and he was nervous about the possibility of you enjoying it more than you enjoyed him.

“C-can…” you trailed off, looking between them both. You were anxious to speak, not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings. That was the last thing you wanted to do, especially after both of them being so good to you.

“It’s okay,” Jake said, joining in on the conversation. “Whatever you want.” You nodded, knowing that it was likely painful for him to say that. It was vicious, Jake’s need for control in the bedroom. You’d only been with him once, but you remembered it well. For Jake to take the lowest rung of the ladder and realize he had the least important opinion was likely very hard for him to comply with. But it didn’t seem like he had any disdain on his face, nor any trouble with accepting it. In truth, it didn’t bother him at all. He was just elated to be there.

“Can you fuck me?” You asked Danny, a hopeful gleam in your eye. His fear of being obsolete was diminished within a second, the question settling over him like a warm embrace.

“That’s what you want, sweet girl?” He crooned, fighting back a grin.

“Yes, please.” You assured him, the corner of your lips turning upward into a soft smile.

“We can do that,” Danny breathed, rising to his knees. “Come here.” He held his hand out for you. You took it, making a move to sit up. You shuffled to your knees and he immediately brought his hands to you, fingers dusting across your skin as he pulled you into a kiss. He was ecstatic at your question, but he didn’t have to say it for you to know. He was worried that you would rather fuck Jake, but the whole ordeal had only seemed to make you fall in love with him more. He was a phenomenal partner, one that loved with his entire heart and soul. You had nothing to ever complain or worry about with him, and the fact that he was willing to potentially risk his own comfort to give you something you wanted was something you could never expect from him. But, he had done it valiantly and with no hesitation, and he seemed to be enjoying it, too. Your guilty pleasure had opened your relationship to a whole new world of possibilities.

He pulled away, moving to the other side of the bed. “Come here,” he beckoned you towards him. You didn’t need instruction to know what he wanted from you. You kneeled in front of him with your back to him. You placed your palms on the edge of the bed, giddy with excitement. His hands took to your waist, and you looked up a Jake with a hopeful expression. The look alone could have sent him to his knees. “Are you going to be good for us, baby?” Danny asked, lining himself up with your entrance.

“Yes, daddy.” You were quick with a response, eager to continue. “So good, I promise.”

“That’s my girl,” his words came out in more of a growl. Jake took a step towards the bed, gently grabbing your face in his hands.

“You tap my leg if you want to stop.” His order was firm. “Even if you just want me to slow down. I want you to be comfortable.” His eyes showed heaps of concern as he spoke. You barely knew Jake to be caring, but perhaps in the years of lusting after you, he had grown quite fond of you. You thought it would be hard not to, even if you were a heartless creature. You wouldn’t describe Jake as heartless, but definitely careless. His affection was much different than a typical persons, but it was still phenomenal, nonetheless.

“Yes, sir.” The words sent a shiver down his spine, thrilled at the thought of fucking you again. He didn’t even care about penetration; he was more than content with the idea of your mouth for the rest of his life. Danny and Jake shared a look, both agreeing that they could continue. Without any further hesitation, Danny pushed himself into you. You let out a groan, already overwhelmed by the feeling. You didn’t have time to think much about it, because Jake had snaked his hand toward the back of your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair. He held your head in place as he brought his hips forward, resting the tip of his cock on your lips as he waited for you to open your mouth. You didn’t make him wait; your lips fell open, an invitation for him to continue as he pleased.

Danny started slow, his thrusts steady but not powerful. Jake was the same, both of them wanting you to get used to the feeling before pushing you any further. Their caution was endearing, but you were too far gone to care for it. You pushed yourself back on Danny, a silent show of your desire for more. A fire flashed in his eyes, the movement sending him into a state of ferocity. His grip on you tightened, and the power behind his hips increased. You let out a moan, the tip of his cock slamming against your cervix as he fucked you. The vibration from your moan sparked the same reaction in Jake. Both boys quickly realized that you were perfectly happy being used by them, and they were happy to utilize it. Jake held your head steady as he set a pace with his own hips, the first moment of sweetness quickly replaced by primal desire.

Jake hit the back of your throat, the feeling coming as a shock to you. Your throat constricted around him as you fought back a gag, but it only drove him further. Danny was lost in you, unable to find any more worry. He brought his hand up and landed it with a sharp smack on your ass. The lingering sting from the impact was irritating, but pleasurable all at once. Your fists were gripping the edge of the mattress, holding on tightly as you bounced back and fourth between the two. “Such a good little whore,” Jake hissed, his grip in your hair tightening further. “God, you take it so well.”

“Feel so fucking good, baby.” Danny agreed, the praise from both sides almost too much to bear. Danny reached around your waist, bringing his fingers to your already sensitive clit. He traced circles as he fucked into you, holding you firmly with his other hand so you could keep your balance. The speed at which Jake was thrusting into your mouth was almost too much to keep up with, but the beautiful sounds that he was singing were all the motivation you needed to keep up with him. Tears were stinging your eyes, falling and making a mess on your cheeks. Every so often, the urge to gag was too strong to hold back, but you persevered mostly because of the pleasure you were receiving from your boyfriend. Your skin was tingling with the threat of another climax. The release you needed was urgent, but you had no way to express it to him. Instead, you let out a slur of muffled noises in hopes that he would recognize the message.

Thankfully, Danny knew you well enough to recognize any message you were trying to convey; he could read you like a book, even in his sleep. “Cum for us, baby.” He demanded, but he was pleading with you. He couldn’t keep up the pace much longer either. His own orgasm was close, too. Jake was on the same page, noticing the state of both of you and recognizing it was similar to his own.

“Cum all over his cock, angel. Show him how good it feels.” Jake joined in on the fun of encouraging you. They had stopped viewing the night as a competition, and rather as a team effort. His words settled in your stomach like iron, the weight too heavy to withstand. He slowed his hips slightly, respectful enough to let Danny take over for a moment. Danny noticed his withdrawal, taking the opportunity to pull you back on him. As he did so, Jake pulled out of you entirely, wanting to give you two the moment of intimacy. Now, with the freedom of your voice, you let out a cry of pleasure. The moan tore through your chest, coating the walls like an obscene decoration.

“Fuck, Danny.” You croaked, unable to find the energy for anything more than that. Within seconds, you descended into another orgasm. Your limbs were trembling, threatening to give out from underneath you. Danny held you up, making sure you knew you were secure as you rode out the high. When the intensity began to fade, he slowly withdrew from you. His chest was heaving, but less from lack of oxygen and more from his carnal need for you. He caught eyes with Jake, sharing a silent thank you for his kindness in letting you two share each other for a moment.

“His turn, baby.” He spoke lowly, now understanding that he would be more than selfish to deprive Jake of an experience like that. His fear was satiated, no more anxiety about losing you or being forgotten. He was aware that there was never a need for the worry to begin with, but your performance and enjoyment spoke louder than any verbal reassurance. Jake looked to Danny as if he granted him the opportunity of a lifetime. Before anyone moved, Danny quickly glanced towards the table by your bedside. He moved towards it, rummaging through the drawer before finding a condom. He flashed it towards Jake, who reached for it with no hesitation. You were all under the same knowledge that Danny called the shots, and you were both more than willing to comply.

Jake slipped on the condom, immediately taking to you to help you stand. With his assistance, you steadied yourself on your feet. He guided your chin upwards and brought you into a kiss. Your hands landed on him, holding him to you in hopes the moment would never have to end. Years worth of pent up frustration and desire was all fizzling away to a dramatic end. When you had imagined the lifetime of torment to be over, you never thought it would be in such a fantastic way. No guilt, nor shame. It was the best possible outcome for a normally grievous situation. He parted from you, but ultimately leaned in for one more kiss. The temptation was too hard to resist. Once he managed to will himself away from you, he took a seat on the edge of the bed.

Danny moved to join you both, standing in front of you in anticipation for the next move. Jake guided you backwards towards him, slowly bringing you down to meet him on the bed. He lined himself up with you and used a hand on your shoulder to pull you down on him. Immediately, he let out a sigh of satisfaction. He had no way to express his gratitude for being granted the opportunity to have you again, so he opted to show you, instead. He used his hands on your hips to set a pace, prompting you to eventually take over. “That’s it, angel.” His mouth was just next to your ear, his breath tickling your neck. “Waited so fucking long for this.” He purred, happy when you continued to grind your hips down on him. “Be good for him, sweetheart. Treat him the same way you did for me.” He ordered, placing a kiss to your shoulder. “He’s been so good to you, letting you be a little slut. Thank him for it.” He let his teeth sink into the same spot his lips were kissing you.

The position was much more gentle than the last, allowing you to recover from the roughness. You looked up to Danny, giving him a smile that was all but sexual. It was your way of saying I love you without having to speak it. Your eyes told him all he needed to know. Danny brought his hand to your face, wiping away any tears still littering your skin. He gave you the same smile, both of you caught in a wordless conversation that was dripping with affection. Jake slipped his one of his hands to your front, fingers settling on your clit. He traced slow circles, causing a whimper to fall from your lips. His other hand came up to your throat, his fingers wrapping around it like a snake going in for a kill. You gave Danny a few innocent bats of your eyelashes, inviting him in with vulgar intent. You opened your mouth as Jake’s grip on your neck tightened. Danny moved forward, and you bent down slightly to meet him.

Danny let you set the pace, understanding that as bad as he wanted you, there was a lot of stimulation on you. You brought him into your mouth as you moved your hips on Jake. You took him as far as you could, feeling him slide down your throat. The pressure from Jake’s hand made it all the more pleasurable for Danny, the already constrained space becoming all the more apparent. Danny let out a groan as you bobbed your head down on him, gradually increasing your speed as you worked. Jakes fingers were working tirelessly at your clit, his own moans filling the air as you came down on him. He had his forehead rested on your back, eyes screwed shut in pleasure as he attempted focus his attention to his hands.

Jake shifted slightly underneath you, allowing him to reach a little deeper into you as you gyrated your hips. The new sensation caused a moan to tear through you. The vibration caused a stutter in Danny’s slow movements, the sensation almost bringing him to an orgasm. All three of you were desperate for a release, but both boys were aching for relief. As much as they loved pleasuring you, they were dangerously close to the edge. Your head was swimming, swirling with lack of blood-flow, which only made the pleasure all the more intense. Jake could feel you tense against him, your walls constructing around him, the feeling sending him into a frenzy. He let out a raspy moan, the sound shooting through you as motivation. You had never once imagined Jake could sound so desperate, so needy for someone or something. To know that it was for you was one of the best feelings in the world. His fingers tightened around your neck once more, the blood supply cut off completely. Danny took it upon himself to pick up his own pace, a slur of curses falling from his mouth at the tightness of your throat.

Without warning, another orgasm took hold, seizing every inch of your body. You wanted to cry out, to scream in response to the overwhelming amount of pleasure, but it was as if your brain short circuited. You couldn’t focus on a single thought; you were completely lost within both of them. Jake let out a growl, finding it near impossible to stop himself from orgasming at the sight of the state you were in. He held on just long enough for you to regain your mind, and he loosened his hold on your neck. Danny pulled back, also dangerously close to cumming. The two boys looked at each other, sharing one single coherent thought. They had no idea how they were going to end the night, and they weren’t sure if they even wanted to.

“What do you want, angel?” Jake said, holding your hips so you wouldn’t continue your movements. “How do you want us to finish?” Danny was appreciative that Jake asked, because they both knew it was in their best interest for you to decide. You lifted your head, a mess of spit decorating your chin and more tears prickling your eyes. You looked exhausted, barely able to hold yourself up, but you knew you wanted them to finish, and you knew exactly how to do it.

“I want…” you trailed off, taking a long inhale to slow the spinning in your head. “I want you both.” The boys shared a look, wide eyed and in shock at the idea.

“B-both of us?” Danny stuttered, unsure if he heard you right. “Like, to fuck you?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, unable to speak from the sheer excitement of the thought.

“Are you sure, trouble?” Jake’s comment proved that he had been yanked out of the cloud of sex, his rationality returning to him momentarily. “Don’t do it just because you think that’s what we want.”

“Im sure,” you nodded “that’s what I want.” A rush of excitement ran through both of them as they glanced at each other. Danny immediately went back to the night table, grabbing a bottle of lube from the drawer. With a small smirk on his lips, he tossed it to Jake.

“You heard her.” He said, knowing that you would never suggest it if you weren’t comfortable.

“Has she… I mean, have you?” Jake asked, still processing the request. Danny gave him a nod, answering any questions that he had with one swift motion. As if he wasn’t shocked enough, the thought settled in his bones like lead. After a few seconds, a smirk began to grow on his lips, too. “Kinky little thing,” he noted “sounds like I really missed out.” Danny’s apprehension of Jake’s smart comments had completely disappeared. This time, he found his words almost comedic. Jake helped you to your feet once more, immediately prompting you into Danny’s arms. “Guess we have to give the lady what she wants.”

Danny leaned down, placing a kiss to your lips. As he did so, he placed his hands on the back of your thighs and scooped you up as he straightened his back. You instinctively wrapped your legs around him, holding on to his arms for support. Jake moved closer, his chest pressing against your back. You leaned into him, accepting his presence with warm welcome. “I’m going to go slow, okay? Tell me if you’re uncomfortable.” He explained. You gave a nod, already aware of the process. After four years, you and Danny had grown quite experimental in the bedroom. The only shock was that it was somebody other than him doing it. Jake placed a few kisses to your exposed neck, starting his exploration with his hand. He started with his finger, slow and cautious in fear of making you uncomfortable. The feeling was new, something you didn’t experience all that often, but it was enjoyable. You let out a whimper, closing your eyes and eager for him to continue. Jake locked eyes with Danny, both sharing a silent agreement of comfortability.

With Jake’s support, Danny slipped his arms under your thighs as you leaned back into Jake. When Jake felt you were comfortable enough, he moved his hand to allow himself access to you. Danny used one hand to line himself up with your cunt, and Jake did the same with your ass. “Ready, baby?” Danny asked.

“Yeah,” you sighed. Danny moved first, slowly pushing inside of you. Jake was more hesitant, but gently brought his hips forward. When he didn’t hear a single utter of discomfort, he continued. When both boys were inside of you, you let out a sigh of relief at the feeling of fullness.

“This is what you wanted, angel?” Jake murmured, already victim to the pleasure. “You just wanted to be a whore for us? Let us have you however we wanted?”

“Yeah.” You gasped, pivoting your body slightly to wrap an arm around Jakes neck. Your other hand was holding Danny’s shoulder, keeping yourself anchored in place as they began to move.

“Is it everything you dreamed of, baby?” Danny asked, matching his movements with Jake’s. They weren’t moving fast, but they were pulling you down on them as they moved, increasing the pressure building in your belly.

“God, yes.” Your head fell back, lost in the feeling of both of them inside you.

“It feels so good, doesn’t it?” Jake growled, his fingers digging into your hips. “Tell us how good it feels.”

“S-so good.” You whined, squeezing your eyes shut. The feeling was transcendent, more powerful than anything you had ever experienced. “It feels so fucking good.” You couldn’t contain your moans any longer, every sound that was begging to come out did just that, painting the room with sin. It was pornographic, the scene absolutely vulgar, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. The obscenity was fantastic, and you never wanted to leave the moment. If you could, you would have stayed there and fucked them for the rest of your life, just like that.

Both of the boys had been teetering the line of their own orgasms for the entire night. They had no idea they would enjoy the evening as much as they did, and they too were dreading the inevitable end. As much as they wanted to climax, they weren’t willing to do so without one last orgasm from you. “Can you give us one more, sweetheart?” Jake hissed, picking up his pace. Danny followed suit, using his strength to pull you down on them.

“You can do it, baby. I know you can.” Danny encouraged you, hopeful that you could do as they were asking. Most of it was due to his need for you to be fulfilled, but some of it was because he was scared he couldn’t hold himself back any more. “You’ve been so good for us, just keep it up for a little bit longer.”

“So proud of you, angel. Doing such a good job. Taking it so fucking good.” The combined praise was exhilarating; you had never felt so appreciated by anyone in your entire life. “One more, beautiful. I know you have it in you.” Jake pleaded.

“Fuck!” You exploded, the word followed by a guttural scream of pleasure. You couldn’t bite back the sound; it tore through you with a ferocity you had never felt before. “I’m gonna,” you assured them, a long jumble of curses flowing from your mouth, following the statement. Jakes hands were burning into you, Danny’s grip on your thighs tightening even more. They aimed to keep their movements synchronized, not wanting to jeopardize your ability to climax. The muscles in your abdomen tensed, your grip on them growing stronger as the burning in your belly reached its peak. You let out a shriek of euphoria, every nerve in your body ablaze with the relentless pleasure. You felt like you were ascending to another dimension, completely unaware of anything other than the feeling of them inside you. Your body was exhausted, and your mind was, too. You were completely fucked out, and they knew that. Before you came down, they both let go, too.

The room was filled with filthy sounds, swearing and slurs of names. The climax was intense for everyone, nobody could comprehend the emotion of the high. You all floated back to reality together, sleep calling to you before the bliss even came to an end. Euphoric was not a strong enough word to describe the feeling lingering throughout your body. After a moment of rest, both boys carefully withdrew from you. You all shuffled to the bed, Danny laying you in the nest of pillows and blankets, his body radiating with an air of love. They shared a look, scared that they might have pushed you too far, but after a moment, a smile began to creep on to your lips.

“How was that, angel?” Jake asked, hand resting on your thigh as a loving decoration.

“It was… phenomenal.” You breathed, finally able to sort your thoughts. “Just… yeah. Phenomenal.” You reiterated your point. They both let out a chuckle, happy that you were content and feeling the same way. “So, did you guys just decide this at the bar? Friendly talk over a few beers?” Their light chuckles turned into full laughter at your question.

“Think the thought was bouncing around for a while. Time was finally right.” Danny said, collapsing beside you.

“Saw that look in your eye when I brought it up, earlier. Couldn’t really resist that.” Jake added, thumb brushing over the skin that was littered with finger shaped bruises.

“I don’t mean to sound greedy… but was that a one time thing, or…?” You trailed off, finally opening your eyes to look between the two. Jake looked to Danny, knowing that he had the ultimate say in the matter. After a moment of silence, Danny gave a shrug.

“Suppose we could try it again, sometime.” He smirked. “If it would make you happy. You know I’d do anything to make you happy.”

“I wouldn’t mind that.” You confessed, a smile breaking out on your lips. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” Jake said, adding a touch of humour to what would normally be an awkward moment. The aftermath should have been dripping with an uncomfortable nature, but it seemed perfectly right. There was no discomfort present at all. You rested your hand on top of his, giving it a gentle squeeze. You reached your other one out to Danny, lacing your fingers together.

“I do think it’s bedtime, though.” You stated, feeling a yawn start to surface.

“Right, we did interrupt, didn’t we?” Danny asked.

“Glad you did.” You hummed.

“So, what now? Do I get to sleep in bed, too?” Jake joked.

“Not a chance.” Danny shook his head, paired with a laugh. “Sorry, man.”

“Have some hospitality,” Jake feigned offence, but his smile told the joke for him. “Couch?”

“Definitely.” You and Danny mumbled, already feeling sleep settle in your bones.

“Understood.” He stood, giving your leg a gentle squeeze. “Hope you’re not too sore in the morning, trouble.” He said before gathering his clothes and disappearing into the hallway. Once he was out of sight, Danny pulled you into his arms.

“I love you,” he mumbled.

“I love you.” You said, relaxing into his hold and resting your head on his chest. “More than anything.” You placed a gentle kiss to his chest. “Thank you, baby. I don’t even know how to tell you how fantastic you are.”

“Like I said, bug. Anything to make you happy.” And he meant it; if allowing you access to Jake every now and again meant that he could keep you happy and have you forever, he would. It was something he could learn to live with, because he knew deep down that Jake was just a guilty pleasure, and he was the love of your life.

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magics-neptunes-things · 4 months

Text

Friends or Lover

Hello there!

This is a lovely request that you can find here. Again it's a fiction so I'm not claiming that I know the truth about anything. Also this is a sweet wonderful world where ACL are unbreakable.

Enjoy ♥

TW : None

PART 1 | PART 3

______________________________________________________________

"When will you stop hiding?"

Leah’s question, asked to Katie make the woman raise a surprised look on her friend. Both in practice before tonight’s game, they were stretching when Leah spoke in a thoughtful and curious tone.

"What?" Katie raises her eyebrows.

"Caitlin and you"

Katie’s eyes automatically fall on Caitlin, who is also busy warming up with Kyra and Steph. The Irishwoman then shifts her attention to Leah, who naturally saw where Katie’s eyes had turned.

"I don’t know what you’re talking about" Katie grumbles as she resumes her exercises.

"Yeah right" Leah chuckles with a mischievous smile.

A few seconds of silence pass between the two young women, Katie preferring not to respond to Leah’s provocation. Obviously, Leah noticed the glances exchanged and the flirty smiles between Katie and Caitlin, for a very long time now. Katie and Leah have known each other for many years and the blonde knows her friend like the back of her hand.

"Is it because of Lia?" asks Leah soon after, more serious this time

Katie sighs and scratch the back of her head. There is no need to denied more if her friend knows already right?

"Kind of. We don't want people assume that Caitlin and Lia broke up because of that. All happened after the break up, the falling into the other and all, and after my break up too. We don't want to hurt Lia in anyway, she's my friend and I love her. And I don't want Ruesha to know too."

"Why that?"

"You know how she is" Katie shrugs

Leah hums, looking at Lia for some seconds. Both women didn't realize that Caitlin is looking at them now, clearly asking herself what the hell they are talking about.

"I don't think you have to worry about Lia, she will be fine. And for Ruesha even if some Arsenal's girls would know, no one will talk to her about it. Sorry to tell you that, but no one really liked your ex."

"How do you know for Lia?" Katie asks, frowning and skipping the last part of the sentence.

"I just know" Leah answers, trying to suppress a smile on her lips.

She failed and Katie notice immediately. The Irish woman drop whatever she was doing, eyes wild.

"Leah Cathrine Williamson, don't tell me..."

"What? Can you really blame me? Plus you can happily live your love with Caitlin now"

"I never said it's love"

"What is it then?"

"... friends? Who cares a lot for each others and... who... give... each others attention and, well, kind of... wild sex?"

Leah almost choke while laughing and Katie rolls her eyes while smiling. Jonas call them soon after, informing them of some last minute tactical changes. Taking advantage that everyone is gathered, Caitlin discreetly approaches Katie. Positioned slightly behind her, Katie must turn a little to look at the Australian when she whispers in her ear.

"What were you and Leah talking about?"

Their faces are only a few centimeters apart and Caitlin momentarily forgets that she asked a question, her eyes sliding on the lips of her interlocutor. Bowing an amused eyebrow when seeing Caitlin’s gaze, Katie gives her a playful hip shot before answering her.

"Not here. Later, okay?"

Seeing Caitlin’s inquisitive and worried gaze, Katie uncross the arms she had crossed on her chest to place a reassuring hand on the Australian’s arm.

"Nothing serious Sweet, don’t worry"

Caitlin watches Katie for a few more seconds before nodding. Katie lets her hand slid along Caitlin's arm to take her hand in hers. The two young women had already shifted their attention back to Jonas when Leah, appearing magically alongside Katie, whispers in her ear.

"Friend’s don’t do things like that."

********

"Leah knows"

Busy tidying up her things after the football game, Caitlin turns abruptly towards Katie who is herself getting rid of her hoodie, leaving her in bra. They came to Caitlin’s home after the game, with both of her cars, not to attract suspicion.

"What? How?"

Katie simply shrugs as she looks at the Australian over her shoulder after throwing her hoodie on the bed. Detaching her hair, she looks at Caitlin through the mirror.

"She knows, that’s all. And I guess it’s just an assemblage of things, she was so sure when she talked to me about it that it was useless for me to denied it."

Caitlin answers nothing to this, mechanically playing with one of her football boots.

"Does that make any difference to you?" asks the Irish woman, gently frowning.

"No, nothing. I just hope it doesn’t cause drama"

"We can trust Leah, I’m sure she won’t tell anyone. And if it’s about Lia, it seems she’s moved on too"

This seems to draw Caitlin's attention, who reports her eyes on Katie’s back. The latter observes her carefully, still through the mirror, and therefore doesn't miss the change in behavior of the brunette.

"Oh? With whom?"

"Leah" answers Katie before waiting a few seconds to ask her the question burning her lips. "Does it bother you?"

"No, not at all. I mean, even if we’re not together I care for her and she deserves to be happy. I'm glad if it's with Leah, I know she will treat her right."

Katie nods thoughtfully and begins to untangle her hair. Which she already did when she got out of the shower earlier, but because of the London wind, they’re already full of knots. A few seconds later, Caitlin is behind her to take the brush from her hands and do it herself. The Australian realized early in their relationship how much Katie appreciated when she plays with her hair.

"That leaves us Ruesha anyway" Caitlin says, after minutes of silence.

"I don’t think anyone from Arsenal will tell her" Katie says, taking Leah's words "And when she will know, I can handle her. And I won't let her to come near you"

"Sur thing, Rambo" Caitlin smirks. "Now can you please put a shirt on or something? I can't stay focus on anything when you're half naked"

"I know" Katie smirk back, before turning around to face Caitlin.

She pass her arms around Caitlin neck, playing with her baby hair before kissing her. Caitlin’s hands find their place on her hips, dragging the other girl more against her. They kiss for some minutes, before Caitlin's lips are finding her way along Katie's neck.

"Leah said something else" Katie whispers before holding her breath when Caitlin bite her.

"What did Leah say?" Caitlin mumble against her skin.

"Friend's don't do things like that" Katie answers, mimicking Leah's accent.

That made the Aussie laughs, and before she can do anything against it, Katie push her on her back in the bed to straddle her. Still smiling, Caitlin let her hands embrace Katie's ass before leaning for another kiss. Katie give it to her, but Caitlin realize there is something else.

"What is it Katie?"

"Leah said..." begin Katie while Caitlin rolls her eyes.

"Leah said a lot of things today. Go on" she adds, seeing the other girl biting her lips.

"She asks me what we are and I didn't know what to answer"

"What did you said?"

Caitlin tilted her head, really curious of Katie's answer. But the Irish woman blush when she remembers what she said. That thing alone intrigues Caitlin, Katie isn't the kind of person who blushes, she's the one who usually makes others blush.

"Is it that bad?" Caitlin laughs

"Kinda" mumble Katie, now sitting on Caitlin's legs, her hands on Caitlin's hips.

"Just tell me"

Rising on her elbows to better observe the youngest, Caitlin looks closely at Katie’s face. The Irish girl seems to find her fingers and nails very interesting at the moment.

"Dunno. I answer something like we are friends who take care of each other, something like that"

Caitlin stay silence for a long moment, at least in Katie's opinion, before burst into laughter.

"Taking care of each others? Is it how you talk about sex now?"

"I mention sex too" Katie answer while rolling her eyes. "But I don't know, I had the feeling that it was more than that. At least, it is for me"

Caitlin's laughter finally stopped after that and she's looking at Katie with a smile and tenderness. They have never talk about the agreements of their relationship, to be fair to Katie. The latter seems to be kind of embarrassed, looking at everything in the room until it's not Caitlin.

"Hey" Caitlin says, taking Katie's chin between her thumb and her index "Of course it's more than sex, for me too."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah" confirms Caitlin, still smiling.

"Amazing sex" smirks Katie

"Amazing sex" Caitlin confirms, before Katie lay on top of her to kiss her properly.

#woso x reader #woso imagine #woso fanfics #woso one shot #katie mccabe #katie mccabe imagine #caitlin foord imagine #caitlin foord #mcfoord

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asahicore · 1 year

Text

our secret moments - lhs (m)

"our secret moments in a crowded room / they got no idea about me and you // all of this silence and patience / pining and anticipation / my hands are shaking from holding back from you" - dress by taylor swift

series masterlist - part one - part two - part three

100 kisses masterlist - prompts 4 (breaking the kiss, your lover instantly pressing their lips back to yours), 26 (“i was supposed to take a shower, alone, but go ahead jump right in”) & 19 (“if we’re caught kissing we’re most likely dead but let’s risk it”)

pairing. best friend’s brother!heeseung x fem!reader synopsis. After avoiding Heeseung for a week, Chaeyeong makes you talk things out with him. In the weeks that follow, the two of you sneak around at night, sharing secret kisses in the backseat of his car and getting to know each other on a deeper level. If you make sure to be careful, there's no reason it should go wrong, right? genre. secret relationship au, fluff, smut (mdni!!), hint of angst at the end word count. 24.2k 😂 a/n. after a thousand years she's finally out!! i'm really sorry for making you guys wait but i was struggling with writing motivation and as you can see she's a bajillion words long so it took me forever to finish it. at least my amazing beta reader bestie in charge @zreamy edited it in like twelve seconds which was super awesome of her oh also shout out to the anon who recommended dress by tswift for this part ur very smart!! ok will stop talking now hope u guys like it and as always pls lmk what u think!!

Heeseung is confused.

He’s always proudly considered himself someone who easily understands other people, who isn’t rattled by sudden shifts in moods and who can adjust to different situations and attitudes. He’s observant and likes trying to figure out what the people around him are thinking or feeling, going over all the possibilities and finding the right way to fix a situation. In that aspect, he’scompletely unlike his sister Seeun, who, always straightforward, prefers asking directly.

But Heeseung doesn’t see the fun in that.

His ability to understand others so well also allows the people around him to rely on him whenever they have concerns or troubles - they trust him to listen intently and provide solutions as best as he can. Even though he has few friends, he knows them inside out, and he’ll always choose that over having tons of friends he doesn’t really know.

This is where the confusing part starts for him. He likes to think of you as a friend - not a close friend like Sunghoon or Jay, but still a friend. You greet each other and even sometimes talk when you run into each other at school or at his place; you take the bus home together every once in a while; you remember each other’s birthdays; you even spent a few hours making a puzzle together once. Surely, that’s what friends do, Heeseung thinks. But to his great despair, understanding other people means he also understands himself well, and he can’t fool himself for that long.

He knows a friend wouldn’t make him feel the way you do. He can’t even blame it on your being a girl, because Chaeyoung, whom he basically sees just as often as you, or any of the girls in his classes that he sees on a daily basis, don’t make his palms sweat and his heart race like you do.

Admittedly, the truth would be closer to ‘my little sister’s best friend who I get even more nervous and awkward than usual around and gives me butterflies every time she so much as looks at me and is awfully pretty and smart and funny, which doesn’t help any of this.’

But ‘friend’ is easier.

So he sticks to it and forces himself to look you in the eye when you talk and to start conversations with you, like he does with all his other friends, hoping that someday, he will finally feel normal around you.

Sadly, that day doesn’t seem to come, and before he knows it, fall arrives and he’s whisked away to college. That’s where he meets Jake.

Jake was Heeseung’s roommate whom he had been terrified of as soon as he laid eyes on him, for Jake seemed to be the complete opposite of Heeseung and the exact type of guy he had hated in high school. The loud type, who sat at the back of the room and paid no attention to the teacher because he was too busy annoying girls or making fart noises with his armpit. The type who made fun of Heeseung’s glasses.

Heeseung was terrified of Jake for about five minutes (and with reason - the first thing Jake had said to him was “Cool glasses, bro”) until they started talking and he realized that he was doing the same major as him, shared a lot of his interests both academic and hobby-wise, and was basically just as much of a nerd as him; he simply hid it much better. Not that Heeseung wanted to hide it or even understood why he should.

One of Jake’s freshman-year goals was to get into a fraternity. But not just any - he had his eyes set on Sigma Sigma Pi because his brother was an alumnus and he had told Jake - in those exact words - that college life wasn’t worth living if you weren’t part of a fraternity. This meant that presence at the first party of the semester was mandatory. Heeseung had shivered at the word ‘party’, but Jake was so resolute that he decided to support his friend and come along, letting himself be convinced that even he might find some fun in it.

Three pints of cheap beer and five shots of tequila later, he concluded that maybe frat parties weren’t so bad after all. As soon as they’d seen him, a group of upperclassmen had taken his crooked glasses and lanky limbs as signs of social awkwardness and decided to help him loosen up by bringing him directly to the kitchen where all the good stuff was. Jake hadn’t expected that Heeseung would be the one to catch their eye, but he wasn’t going to complain about getting to party with the frat bros on his first night of college.

Heeseung, whose lips had never touched so much as a drop of alcohol, was wasted barely two hours into the party. Jake fared slightly better, but only because he knew better than to accept every drink that came his way. To this day, Heeseung finds himself unable to remember anything that happened after eleven p.m. that night, so imagine his surprise the next morning when he woke up half-naked in a stranger’s bed.

Heeseung, who had practically never had a female friend, let alone a girlfriend. Heeseung, who had never even been close to getting his first kiss, and whose dick only knew his right hand. Heeseung, who had had a singular crush his whole life, and had never been able to do anything about it. So imagine his surprise when said stranger turned out to be a girl - and a pretty one, at that - who was smiling down at him as he blinked his eyes open and asking him if he slept well.

She was sitting on the edge of her bed, close to Heeseung’s chest, which he rapidly covered with a blanket as soon as he realized it was bare. He was sleepy and confused, but more than that, he was hungover - his head was throbbing, his mouth was dry, and he felt like he might be sick any second. Obviously, Heeseung had never had a hangover before, nor had he ever woken up in a girl’s bed with no idea of how he got there, and the two new unexpected experiences made him unable to think or speak. He was just really confused. And really sleepy.

The girl slightly furrowed her eyebrows but laughed, seemingly amused by Heeseung’s behavior. “Are you okay?”

“I- um, yeah, I’m fine, but I, um…”

Heeseung winced at his own awkwardness, but he had no idea how to behave in such a situation. He also wasn’t sure how to tell this girl that he had no idea who she was or what he was doing with her.

She gave him a weird look but continued laughing. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’re acting weird.”

This only confused Heeseung further, because he always acted like this. He looked away from her questioning eyes and found an interesting spot on the blanket for his eyes to focus on. “What, um, what happened last night? I think I had too much to drink…” he said, voice getting quieter the more he spoke.

This girl was apparently having a lot of fun, because his words only made her laugh more. “You can say that again. You were out.” Heeseung’s head whipped at that and his expression was so alarmed that she instantly tried to reassure him. “Don’t worry, you didn’t do anything too embarrassing.”

He still didn’t say anything and looked terrified out of his mind. “Do you not remember?” she asked, and he shook his head. “Anything?” He shook his head again.

She sighed. “Do you know my name?”

Heeseung looked down again, and she could feel his guilt in the third head-shake.

“Guess you really did drink a lot. I’m Yunjin,” she said, extending a hand out for him to shake.

He cleared his throat and took the girl’s hand. “H-Heeseung.”

Yunjin tilted her head at Heeseung as if trying to figure him out. “You know, you were really different last night. A completely different person.”

No matter how mortifying the thought of behaving inappropriately was to Heeseung, he preferred knowing what he did to staying in the dark. “What was I like?” he asked, sounding almost scared.

Yunjin took a second to think. “You were just really… confident,” she said, and Heeseung looked at her in total disbelief. “You talked to everyone, danced like crazy, flirted with me…” She paused for a second, then looked at Heeseung with a teasing smile. “You’re a really good kisser, you know.”

Heeseung’s eyes widened so much they could’ve popped out of their sockets. “Me?!” he exclaimed as if he’d just heard the most ridiculous thing ever. Yunjin just laughed and nodded.

“But right now, you’re like a beaten puppy or something. You act like I’m gonna punch you any second,” she joked, finally getting a chuckle out of Heeseung.

They talked for some more, and he relaxed enough to ask more questions. But maybe he shouldn’t have had, because his embarrassment reached its peak when Yunjin told him that she had taken him upstairs the previous night, not realizing how drunk he was because of how drunk she was, but that they hadn’t done anything more than kissing. He asked whether he’d fallen asleep as soon as his body hit the bed, so Yunjin, reluctantly, had to inform him that he “couldn’t get it up” - her words. That was why he’d woken up in just his underwear.

Luckily for him, their conversation was cut short when the rightful owner of the room kicked them out. He scrambled to put his clothes back on, and he and Yunjin ran into Jake in the hallway just as they exited the room.

“Heeseung! My man!” Jake exclaimed, circling his friend’s shoulders with his arm and ruffling his hair. The three of them decided to go get breakfast together in an attempt to fight off their hangovers, and a beautiful friendship ensued. Jake and Yunjin quickly figured out how fun it is to tease Heeseung for his awkwardness and nerd tendencies, but they were also really good friends.

It didn’t take long for them to find out about his long-standing crush on his sister’s best friend, and they immediately made it their mission to help Heeseung channel his alter ego so that he could finally make his move on you. He was reluctant at first, but after some time, he found that it was fun to party on the weekends, flirt shamelessly with strangers (and yes, sometimes make out with them) and hit the gym with Jake rather than stay holed up in his room and just study or game. They convinced him to get a haircut and some nicer clothes, and they even went to get their ears pierced together on a night when the alcohol made them feel like it was the greatest idea ever.

Of course, Jake and Heeseung were accepted in Sigma Sigma Pi, and Yunjin in the twin sorority. Heeseung developed this sort of odd reputation of being a player and a huge flirt but never actually taking a girl back to his room. Not to say no one tried - many girls heard about him and thought they would be the one to bag this boy that only seemed to get more handsome at every party, but no matter what they did or said, they were no match for you.

Even though he hadn’t seen you in months, you were still on his mind all the time. To say he missed you would be an understatement, and it was a weird feeling, considering you were barely friends. But he missed taking the bus with you and hearing you laugh, even if it was at him, even when you were teasing him. He missed getting a glimpse of you in the hallways or seeing your shoes at the entrance of his house when he came home from school. He daydreamed about those hours you had spent together working on a puzzle together more often than he’d like to admit.

He didn’t like the idea that some girls might think he was leading them on, but once he knew his flirting actually worked on people, he couldn’t wait to see you again and try his new tricks on you. He tried not to self-doubt too much, but he was scared that you wouldn’t like it - he wanted to get a positive reaction out of you, not make you want to run the other way.

So when he finally came home for the summer and started working his charm on you, he was immensely relieved to see you get shy and flustered around him. He finally understood why you’d always teased him - there was nothing like knowing your heart had skipped a beat because of him, much like his had because of you thousands of times before.

It’s hard to always keep his cool around you, however, and he also finds himself getting nervous once in a while. But the hope that you might like him back keeps him going, so he takes every opportunity he can to talk to you and, while he’s at it, call you pretty or smile at you (a smile he’s practiced many times in the mirror for maximum effectiveness). To his immense joy, it works every time - so when the party rolls around, he knows he has to make an actual move. It also helps that he’s invited his number one wingman to stay with him for a couple weeks, so that his confidence never wavers.

He thinks he’s hit the jackpot when the bottle lands on you and on him right afterwards. He thinks he’s reached heaven when he finally feels your lips on his, when he finally gets to have you close and touch your hair and hold your waist and have your hands on him. The seven minutes pass by in a flash, and heaven is ripped away from him by his own best friend when the closet doors open - but the worst part happens during the days that follow. Those are hell.

You do the one thing that he had hoped you wouldn’t - you run away from him. In one week, you don’t even say ten words to him, just greet him quickly and proceed to escape as far as you can. He notices the change in your behavior right away - how could he not? And so a thousand possibilities run through his mind, ranging from “the kiss was awful, and she hates my guts, and she never wants to see my face ever again” to “she’s just scared about the repercussions this could have if Seeun finds out.” None of his friends can calm him down or get him to think straight.

This whole ordeal makes him panic so much that he has fully gone off flirty mode - how could he flirt with you if he couldn’t even get you to talk to him? He had been sure he’d read into your reactions right, that you had feelings for him, and that he was right to make a move, but not anymore. Now, he was just confused.

Since that fateful party, you’ve unconsciously started seeing your life as pre-Heeseung incident and post-Heeseung incident.

Pre-Heeseung incident: it’s painful having such an intense one-sided crush, but at least you can keep it to yourself and not have to worry about Seeun’s reaction to you being in love with her brother. Sure, said brother’s constant flirting and general existence don’t make things easy for you, but it’s better to keep it a secret than to act on it.

Post-Heeseung incident: you have no idea what to do with yourself now that you know what it actually feels like to kiss and touch Heeseung, so you’ve resorted to avoiding him like the plague and pretending nothing has ever happened. It’s not fun either, and having to keep your inner turmoil to yourself is even harder than before, but you don’t want to risk your friendship with Heeseung over one kiss.

On the afternoon of day five, you’re going crazy reiterating the events of the party, so you decide to text the girls and ask them to come over. They both answer that they’ll be there in fifteen, but not even three minutes after you’ve sent the text, Chaeyeong appears at your bedroom door, face red and sweaty like she’s just run a marathon.

Since it’s Chaeyeong, you’re only mildly surprised to see her there, but you’re curious about her quick arrival nonetheless. “You’re already here?”

“Y/N, we need to talk,” she says with all the seriousness in the world. You’d be scared shitless if these words had come out of anyone else’s mouth, but knowing your best friend, she’s just exaggerating the gravity of whatever this is about.

Even though you try to match her earnestness, you can’t keep the amusement out of your voice when you answer, “Sure, go ahead.”

She catches onto your lack of seriousness right away. “You think this is funny?” she says in an almost threatening way. “I came early so we could talk about your little Heeseung problem without Seeun.”

That’s enough to shut you up for a few seconds as you look at her mouth agape, heat rising to your face. She takes your silence as a victory and crosses her arms over her chest, waiting for you to say something. “My little Heeseung problem?” you echo stupidly, and she nods. “I don’t have a little Heeseung problem.” You know that nothing about your tone or expression is convincing, but you still hope - in vain - that she’ll let you off the hook.

“No, you’re right, you have a big Heeseung problem. And it must be discussed.”

You roll your eyes as she takes a seat next to you on your bed. “You’re taking this way too seriously, you know.”

One thing about Chaeyeong is she’s never at a loss for words. It makes arguing with her exhausting because she’s always got something to bite back at you, no matter how much of a reach it is. So before the conversation even starts, you know she’s going to win it. You’re afraid of the truth she might shove into your face, but you figure it needs to be done at some point, so you let her.

“What’s serious is this crush you’ve been harboring on him all these years, and that now that something has finally happened and you might be going somewhere with him, you’re running the other way.”

You only hear the beginning of her sentence, too focused on the bomb she’s just dropped on you. “You-you knew?”

It’s her turn to eye-roll. “Only an idiot wouldn’t notice how much you like that boy, Y/N. Which means that Seeun is an idiot, by the way.”

The mention of your other best friend makes you wince slightly. It feels wrong to be going behind her back to talk about your crush on her big brother like this. “Yeah, I know,” Chaeyeong says as if reading your mind. “I’ve thought about it, and I honestly have no idea how she’ll react.”

You both look at your feet for a while, mulling over the different ways this could go down with Seeun. “It definitely doesn’t look good,” you say defeatedly. “I mean, if her reaction at the party is anything to go by. When we were playing the game, you know. When the bottle landed on me and Heeseung, she looked completely disgusted, but when we came out she didn’t even question whether something might have happened, as if that was just impossible for her.”

Chaeyeong sighs. “Well, if you tell her, she’ll definitely be surprised. But I’m sure she’d be fine with it… right?”

Your friend’s doubt only makes you feel even worse, and you drop your head into your palms with a groan. “I hate everything about this.”

Chaeyeong nudges your shoulder with her own, making you turn your head to look at her. “I’m sure you didn’t hate that whole part when you were in the closet with-”

“Chaeyeong!” you scream before she can finish her godforsaken sentence, but it only makes her break into a fit of giggles. You try to pretend to be mad at her but a smile breaks through your pout at the sound of her laughter.

“Well? You can’t deny it, can you?”

It takes another nudge of her shoulder with yours to make you reply. “Of course not, but-”

“So that’s it then! Let’s not think about any of the possible bad outcomes for now, and just focus on getting you and him together.” She doesn’t even give you time to answer - your wide eyes and panicked expression are enough for her to know what you would say. “Listen, I’ve had to sit here and watch you and Heeseung make heart eyes at each other without the other knowing, and that was already excruciating enough - I can’t stand to watch you make heart eyes at each other now that you know what the other feels.”

It takes you a second to process all of her words. “Y-you think Heeseung makes heart eyes at me?” you ask weakly. It’s like you have selective hearing today.

“Girl! He somehow manages to make it even more obvious than you. Also, Jake told me that Heeseung told him that he likes you. Can’t get much more reassurance than that.” Your dumbstruck expression makes her look at you in disbelief. “You seriously don’t see it?” she says in a fascinated voice, as if in wonder at your stupidity. You can only slightly shake your head no.

“I can’t believe this is what I have to deal with…” She sounds like an overworked office worker and mother of four rather than a high school senior on her summer break, and her attitude would make you laugh if you weren’t so rattled by the thought that Heeseung might have actually liked you all these years, you were just too caught up in your own feelings for him to notice it.

She takes your hand in hers and sighs. “I can promise you I wouldn’t be saying all this if I didn’t really believe it,” she starts, voice much softer than before. “I remember the way he would get all shy and blushy whenever you were around, and that boy was already one hell of a nervous wreck on his own. And the blatant flirting since he’s come back makes me want to applaud him and vomit everywhere at the same time,” she says with a chuckle.

“Really?” you ask, a small smile appearing on your lips as you let yourself be convinced by your friend’s words.

“Really. And you, I’ve noticed how you pay more attention when his name is mentioned. And you were always a bit cheerier on the days you came back from school after riding the bus with him. Don’t even get me started on the way you’ve been this summer. You couldn’t get more obvious. It screams ‘I can’t handle being around this man for more than a minute so I’ll just run away,’ and I mean that in a good way.”

You look at Chaeyeong with a pout, and her smile grows bigger. You squint your eyes as you look away, trying to keep your grin down. “Guess I wasn’t as discrete as I thought I was.”

“You really weren’t,” she laughs. “Probably thought it was your own little secret, right?”

You’re slightly embarrassed that you’d been uncovered such a long time ago, but it’s also a relief, being able to share this with someone.

“I did…” you admit, and it makes you both break into laughter. After you’ve calmed down, you ask Chaeyeong why she’d never said anything about it before. She thinks about it for a bit before answering.

“I’m not completely sure. Maybe because you and Heeseung were both such losers, I thought that even if I told you I knew, nothing would happen.” You scoff, slightly offended, but more because you know she’s right than anything. “And I don’t know, you two were just so cute with your crush on each other. I wanted to let you figure it out on your own, but now it’s taken so long and it’s right in your face but you’re still doing nothing about it, so I got fed up.”

You nod at her words, taking it all in. Was it really time to let Heeseung know about your feelings?

“I also feel bad for Heeseung, you know.” You look at her, waiting for her to continue. “Poor guy has been in agony these days. You need to stop ignoring him. I know it’s because you feel weird about him being Seeun’s brother, but I swear I think he might die if you don’t just at least talk to him. I’ve actually talked to Jake…” she reveals, and you wouldn’t have questioned her talking to Heeseung’s friend if it weren’t for the way she said it.

“You have?” you repeat with a suggestive tone.

“I have,” she says with a smile, “but that’s not the topic right now. Anyway, he said that Heeseung’s been losing his mind trying to figure out what to do. I think it’d make things a lot easier if you just went and talked to him, cleared things up, confessed your undying love for him, hm?”

“Who are we confessing to?” Seeun asks, suddenly appearing at the door and making you and Chaeyeong scream in genuine terror.

“Nice to see you guys, too,” she chuckles before flopping down on the bed.

Chaeyeong is only good with her words when it comes to arguing - she’s perhaps the most terrible liar you’ve encountered in your life. But at least she knows this, and is always deft at switching the topic rather than attempting to come up with an excuse. “Y/N and I were just talking about watching some movies with the boys tonight. Apparently, they’re having a movie night at your place since you’ve got the best TV, and Jake asked if we wanted to join.”

You know better than to look surprised by Chaeyeong’s words and make it clear that she’s lying, but you’re still caught off-guard by the sudden news. Movie night meant being in a darkened room in proximity to Heeseung, and we all know what happened the last night you were in a dark room with him.

“Y/N and I thought it was a good idea, but we wanted to ask you first. Right, Y/N?” Chaeyeong suddenly prompts, momentarily tearing you away from your thoughts of Heeseung’s lips on yours.

“Right,” you reply, somehow successfully pretending like you’re not on the verge of spontaneously combusting. You’re even more embarrassed now that you know that Chaeyeong and Jake know about your little crush, and you can’t even pretend it isn’t there like you usually do.

Seeun hums. ��Alright, sounds fun.”

The three of you chat the rest of the afternoon away, and before you know it, you’re getting ready to go to Seeun’s house. As you rummage around your drawers for that one pair of soft sweatpants that manages to be the most comfortable article of clothing on Earth while also making your butt look amazing, your phone buzzes twice, and so do Chaeyeong’s and Seeun’s. The first notification is of Heeseung having added you to a group chat simply named “movie night”, and the second is of a link being sent to said chat. When you click on it, it redirects you to a poll to rank ten movies in order of how much you want to watch them. Your favorite movie is on the list, and you can’t help but wonder whether it’s a coincidence or whether it’s something you’d talked about during high school and that he’d somehow remembered.

Once everyone has voted, you receive a second link, this one asking you to rank the three top movies in watch order. A smile breaks on your lips at this - it’s very Heeseung of Heeseung to do this and avoid later confrontation. As if to confirm this thought, your phone dings for a third time with a text from him that reads “this is so we don’t spend thirty minutes choosing a movie.” You’re not sure why everything he does is so endearing to you, all you know is that trying to avoid as much conflict as possible is a very Heeseung thing to do, and you’re grateful for it too.

When you get to Seeun’s house around seven-thirty p.m., the first movie is already up on the TV, waiting to be played. It’s horror, and you’re glad it wasn’t picked to be watched last, otherwise, you might’ve had trouble falling asleep. You quickly notice that Heeseung is the only one of the boys not currently sitting on the couch or in an armchair, and the question appearing in your head is answered almost right away when Seeun asks about her brother’s whereabouts.

“He’s just in the kitchen getting the drinks ready,” Jay answers as he sprawls his body even more across the armchair he’s reserved for himself.

“Why don’t you go help him out, Y/N?” Chaeyeong proposes with a deceptively innocent smirk, and if Seeun hadn’t been watching, you’d have given your hellspawn of a friend a serious death glare, but all you can do is mumble out “sure” and make your way to the dreaded kitchen. The butterflies you used to feel when thinking of Heeseung or being around him before have now turned into brutal rhinos trampling your insides, and it doesn’t feel so nice.

“Hey, Heeseung,” you say quietly as you enter the kitchen, and your nerves make your own voice sound unfamiliar to your ears. He gasps at your sudden appearance, a blush immediately creeping on his cheeks, and you’re glad the lid on the bottle of Coke he’s holding is tightly screwed, otherwise, it might’ve spilt everywhere.

“O-oh, hey, Y/N,” he stammers in response. It’s awkward for three seconds as the two of you stare at each other until you remember why you’re here in the first place.

“Um, I heard you might need some help?” you ask, and again, the sound of your own voice, so squeaky and unsure, makes you wince.

“Oh, sure. Thanks,” he says with a hint of a smile. “Here, you can fill this bowl with ice.”

You comply, and the refreshing feeling of the ice against your fingers somewhat helps to cool you down. It’s only quiet for a few moments, because although starting a conversation is terrifying, the tension in the silence and the thought of your feelings being left unsaid is far worse. So you take a deep breathe and open your mouth to speak.

“I’m sorry-”

You and Heeseung exchange a bewildered look, the surprise of apologizing at the same time quickly fading out into a burst of shy giggles. “You go first,” he says, risking another glance your way as he busies himself again with the glasses and the drinks.

“I’m sorry for avoiding you all week,” you start. “I wanted to talk to you, I was just… scared. And I didn’t know what to say.”

Explaining your behavior any further means confessing your feelings for him and articulating your fear of Seeun finding out, and even though it must be all clear as day by now, you’re still not quite ready to talk about it. Not now, when your friends are in the room right next to you. So you don’t add anything and hope that Heeseung has developed some sort of telepathy skills over the last few days.

When he doesn’t press any further, instead saying it’s okay and smiling at you (properly, with eye contact), a weight seems to be lifted off your heart. “Your turn now,” you say, still smiling. You’ve emptied the ice cube tray into the bowl, so all you can do is look at Heeseung and wait for him to speak. If only you knew how much harder that made it for him.

“I’m sorry for kissing you and then acting weird.” He can’t quite bring himself to look at you as he speaks, and even though he’s done getting the drinks ready, he keeps his eyes trained on the glasses as if they’ll tell him what to say next. “I’m not sorry for kissing you,” he adds quickly, “not at all.” Heat rises to your face and you have to tear your gaze away from him for a second. “I was confused ‘cause I never thought you might… want that too,” he says, voice quieter than before, like he’s scared that the others might hear him - like he’s scared that you might hear him.

The words are right there at the tip of your tongue, begging to be let free - so for once, you comply. “I do.” Your voice is just as quiet as his, perhaps even more so, and if it wasn’t for Heeseung’s sharp intake of breath, you’d have thought he didn’t hear you.

Your gazes lock, and the simultaneous relief and fear you feel are mirrored in his wide eyes. His face then breaks into a huge grin, and he is so dazzlingly handsome that you have to look away once more. You smile at the ground instead, grateful that breathing is something you do without having to think about it, otherwise, you’d have stopped doing it a long time ago.

Neither of you says anything more, letting the silence do its job. You look back up at him as he sighs deeply, almost contentedly, it seems. He smiles at the glasses as if they told him the right thing to say. He looks at you, smiles wider, looks away, looks back, looks away again, scratches the back of his head. You watch the whole time, small giggles bubbling up your throat and out of your lips.

He sighs once more and looks back at you, keeping his eyes on yours this time. “Okay, we should head back now. But talk more later?” he asks, and you nod immediately. Any other time, you’d have been embarrassed to show your interest so obviously, but you’d just told each other you both wanted to kiss the other, so agreeing to talk more later felt like nothing now.

“Okay,” he repeats, grin still wide on his lips as he picks up the tray and heads back to the others, you following close behind.

“Took you long enough,” Seeun says, scrolling on her phone as you step into the living room, but you’re too focused on something else to quip back at her.

Jay is still reigning over his armchair while Sunghoon, Seeun, Chaeyeong and Jake, in this order, occupy the main couch that faces the TV. This means that the only spot left for you and Heeseung to sit in is the other armchair opposite Jay’s, obviously big enough for one person but slightly too small for two people to sit comfortably on, as in to sit without their bodies touching each other.

Heeseung had just admitted he wanted to kiss you. You had also just admitted to Heeseung you wanted to kiss him. Now, you were going to sit together in an armchair that forced two people into proximity, and you had to pretend like that was fine.

When you manage to take your eyes away from the godforsaken armchair, your eyes meet Jake’s, then Chaeyeong’s, and that’s when you realize. They did it on purpose. The poorly-concealed smirks on their faces and giggles threatening to escape their lips as they take in your reaction make it all too clear. You could strangle your best friend right now. You know she’s doing you a favor, and deep down, you’re thankful for it, but you also know sitting through these movies is going to be the most arduous task of your life when Heeseung is right there. Close enough to touch, close enough to lace your fingers together or thread yours through his hair. You remembered very well from your game of seven minutes in heaven that it was just as soft as it looked.

You send Chaeyeong yet another death glare, but it only makes her smile more. You set the bowl of ice on the table after Heeseung’s put the drinks tray down, and immediately make yourself a glass of Sprite to keep your hands occupied for at least a little bit.

While you do that, Heeseung takes a seat on the armchair, and the sight you’re greeted with when you turn to sit next to him makes you almost drop your drink. After the little confession-like moment you shared in the kitchen, it seems like all his confidence from before the party has returned to him. He’s taken a comfortable seat indeed - he’s shamelessly manspreading, thighs almost taking up the whole space as if inviting you to find your own seat there. He lets himself be engulfed by the soft cushions as his head falls back against the headrest, exposing his neck and prominent Adam’s apple.

You’d just gotten used to shy, flustered Heeseung again, only for him to return to his confident self in the blink of an eye. You try not to let it deter you, especially because you’re not the only two in this room, but his smirk as he looks up at you makes it hard not to. All you can do is redirect your death stare towards him, but sadly, much like with Chaeyeong, the only effect it has is to make him smile wider, as if torturing you was a fun pastime for them.

You mumble at him to scooch then sit down next to him, knees bent close to your chest so your legs don’t touch his too much, but that plan is quickly thrown out of the window when you feel his hand sneaking behind your back until it reaches your waist, settling there. Even with a layer of fabric between his hand and your skin, the contact sends a shiver down your spine, and you have to keep yourself from audibly gasping. Conscious of the drink in your hand, Heeseung pulls you gently towards him, making your bent knees fall to the side and rest on his thigh. So much for keeping your distance.

Even your idea of occupying your hands with a drink turns out to be useless twenty minutes into the movie when the first jumpscare almost makes you spill your Sprite all over you and Heeseung. You take a big gulp before leaning forwards to set your glass on the table, and Heeseung’s hand stays put the whole time, even squeezing gently when you find your seat again. Without the drink, you know it’s a bit weird to stay sitting upright, but you can’t imagine leaning fully back against Heeseung or resting your head on his shoulder. This already feels like a lot - to be even closer to him would probably send you into cardiac arrest. Plus, even in the darkness of the room, the light coming from the TV screen would be enough for the others to see your and Heeseung’s position on the armchair, and you definitely don’t need Seeun to see you cuddling up to her brother.

You’re already tense from sitting right next to Heeseung, and the movie playing on the screen is not helping - creepy music that puts you on edge, camera angles that only let you see the character’s face and nothing else, weird silhouettes that flash for just a second - this is one of the rare times a horror movie actually does what it’s supposed to do, i.e. scare you. You almost managed to forget the boy’s presence next to you, but when a particularly suspenseful scene plays, you instinctively reach out to grab something, anything, and of course, that happens to be his wrist. You’re so immersed in the movie that it’s only when he wriggles out of your grasp and takes your hand in his instead that you realize what you’ve done.

It’s like somebody pressed the pause button as you look down at your intertwined hands, the sound and light coming from the TV screen not registering in your mind anymore. When you dare to look at Heeseung’s face, he’s already shyly smiling down at you. He quickly turns away to watch the movie instead, but you’re still too focused on the warmth of his hand and the feeling of his fingers between yours to care whether the stupid white girl will make it out of the house safely or not.

This is something you’ve daydreamed about a thousand times before. Every time you’d ride the bus together or walk side by side, you wondered what would happen if you just reached out and grabbed his hand. It was always right there - but the line you’d be crossing seemed miles and miles away. Now that it’s finally happening, you realize it’s a lot better than you could ever have imagined. You feel like you should be freaking out, scared by what this simple touch means and by the fact that Seeun could turn her head at any moment and see you holding hands with her brother, but all you feel is contentment. Your feelings for Heeseung just needed to be reciprocated, and now that you know they might be - no, that they are - it’s like you can be at peace with them.

Feeling bolder, you squeeze Heeseung’s hand once then bring it to rest on your knee. You sense his gaze on your face once again, but you avoid it and keep your eyes fixated on the TV screen, unable to keep yourself from smiling even though one of the side characters is getting brutally murdered. Your smile only gets bigger when he squeezes your hand back.

You stay like this for so long that your and Heeseung’s hands seem to melt together, and you can hardly tell where your own fingers end anymore. The doorbell rings during another tense scene, making everyone jump in their seats, but it’s just the pizza guy.

Seeun goes to get the door and pay, and the poor girl has barely placed the pizzas on the coffee table that the boys are already pouncing on it like starved children. Only Heeseung stays put, laughing at his friends and waiting for them to get a slice. The fact that he gives you a plate - with a slice of your favorite pizza, no less - before getting his own shouldn’t make your heart race as much as it does, but your cheeks still heat up at the simple gesture. The darkness of the room does nothing to hide your flustered expression as you mumble out a ‘thank you.’

You all eat your fill and watch the rest of the movie, agreeing that the end was quite disappointing (even though you were all stressing out and holding onto each other for dear life during the climax - Heeseung’s hand found yours again as soon as you were done eating, and you’re pretty sure one of his fingers was close to breaking with how hard you were grabbing him).

To everyone’s surprise, Seeun announces that she’s going to bed halfway through the second movie.

“But it’s only eleven p.m.!” Chaeyeong protests, as if knowing the time would make Seeun change her mind.

“I know, but that pizza took me out for some reason. I’ve been falling asleep for the past half hour, might as well just go to bed.” There’s not much to argue, so a chorus of ‘goodnights’ ensues as Seeun trudges upstairs. The three on the couch immediately use the added space to spread out more, Sunghoon extending his legs to the side so that the back of his knees rests in Chaeyeong’s lap and his feet in Jake’s. Both of them complain about the weight but don’t do anything to make him actually move, so he contentedly keeps his position.

You can’t help but think that with Seeun gone, you can also make yourself more comfortable. You’re thinking about whether to change your position on the armchair, going over the different ways Heeseung might react, when you catch Chaeyeong’s look. She raises her eyebrows at you as if to say, “what are you waiting for?” as if your next move should be obvious. You look away from her and back at the screen, then start to lean backwards as naturally as possible, but that’s hard to do when your heart is beating a thousand miles an hour. Luckily (or not) for you, Heeseung seems to get the message immediately and wraps his free hand around your shoulder, bringing you closer to him - closer than you had intended to.

The loudness of the movie isn’t enough to drown out the sound of your sharp intake of breath at the sudden proximity, and you feel your face heating up when Heeseung chuckles at your reaction. This is a comedy movie you’ve watched a bunch of times already, which makes it all too easy for you to focus on him rather than the screen. Now that your head rests on his shoulder, if you turned your face ever-so-slightly, you could get a proper whiff of his cologne and his skin. You really, really want to bury your nose in his neck and inhale, but you’re afraid that might get you a couple of weird looks.

You look down at your intertwined hands again and happily realize that you can now unabashedly stare at Heeseung’s hands the way you had always wanted to. You can finally play with his long fingers, tracing the outline of them and bending them softly at the knuckles, and admire the lines on his palm as if they might reveal everything you want to know about him. You can finally do it, so you do, almost unconsciously - you don’t realize that you’re touching his hand as freely as if it were your own until you hear his breath start to get shakier.

You halt your motions right away and look up at him alarmed, scared that you’ve made him uncomfortable when he avoids your gaze. But then he reaches for your hand again and the corner of his lips tug ever-so-slightly into a small smile. You’re not sure if it’s the light of the TV screen on his face, but it even seems like his cheeks have reddened. You’ve been flustered one too many times to not recognize the symptoms, but it’s still surreal to think that you might have the same effect on Heeseung as he has on you.

Giddy with this new realization, you make yourself more comfortable against Heeseung, resting your head in the dip between his neck and his shoulder and bringing your knees closer to him. His hand travels from your shoulder to your waist, holding you there. You continue to play with his other hand, only half-paying attention to the movie. In this new position, you can feel Heeseung’s chest rising in rhythm with his breathing, and that is much more mesmerizing to you than any movie could be.

The only times you tear yourself away are when Jay brings snacks in from the kitchen and when you need to go to the toilet between the second and third movies. Other than that, you stay cuddled up close to Heeseung, basking in the warmth you’d been longing for for years. It’s so comfortable that you never want to leave, even when Heeseung’s touch burns as his hand sneakily finds its way underneath your t-shirt to trace patterns against the bare skin of your waist. You almost yelp from how unexpected but pleasant it is.

You both easily stay awake until the end of the third movie, perhaps because your nerves are too much in a frenzy from being so close for you to feel sleepy. Sunghoon, Jake and Chaeyeong, however, have all fallen asleep, and Jay wishes you goodnight and heads upstairs as soon as the movie is over.

In a whispered conversation that feels too intimate for your own good, you and Heeseung decide to let the others sleep on the couch rather than wake them up, and to clean up the pizza boxes and other things littering the coffee table.

It’s quiet as you throw the trash away and put everything back in cupboards or in the fridge. You’re on your last bite of a cold slice of pepperoni pizza when Heeseung breaks the comfortable silence.

“So…”

You look at him as he stands, lower back against the counter and gaze directed towards the ground. Now that you’re in a bright room, you know that the blush on his cheeks isn’t just a trick of the light. A smile that mirrors his grows on your lips at his endearing shyness.

“So…” you echo, making him chuckle.

“I’m not sure where to start,” he confesses, scratching the back of his neck. You’re not sure how this is the same Heeseung that had held you close to him just moments prior, but you understand that he might revert back to his nervous self when he’s in a more serious situation. You’re not completely relaxed either.

You pretend to think for a second, but you know exactly what it is you want to ask. “Well, there is this thing I’ve been curious about…” you start. He looks at you and tilts his head to the side, so you take it as your cue to go on. “What the hell happened when you were away at college for you to come back so different?” you ask with an amused tone to your voice.

So he tells you about his freshman year. About the party that Jake dragged him to and everything that ensued after it. He doesn’t go into too much detail about exactly how he met Yunjin or all the flirting (and kissing) practice he’s had, just saying that he found ways to build his confidence - and at the end, he quietly confesses that he’d done it to find the courage to confess to you, but that it hadn’t gone so well after all. You try not to dwell on the fact that he changed so much for you, because thinking about it for too long would probably melt you into a puddle.

“What do you mean, it didn’t go so well?” you question softly, lowering your voice to the same volume as him. You’ve realized that when you and Heeseung talk, you often end up doing so really quietly. You don’t know why you like it so much.

“Well, you know, you’ve been avoiding me all week,” he starts, trying to make his tone the least reproachful he can, because he’s not mad at you, not at all - if anything, he’s mad at himself. “So I thought I’d really messed things up.”

“You didn’t mess anything up, Heeseung. If anything, I’m the one who made things weird. I just…” You sigh. “I’m so scared of Seeun finding out. But…”

“But?” he prompts, a hopeful look on his face. Clearly, dating his sister’s best friend isn’t as much of a dilemma for him as it is for you.

“But I’m more scared of letting you go now that I finally have you,” you say to the ground.

A beat passes. “So don’t,” he whispers, voice so low you barely hear it - but you do, and you understand his words loud and clear. They resonate in your head as he takes a step closer to you, then another and another. You feel your heart pulse throughout your entire body when he reaches you, standing right in front of you.

Your breath hitches when he rests one of his hands on the kitchen counter behind you. Gently, he cups one side of your face with his other hand and brushes your cheek with his thumb, prompting you to look up at him. He’s so close you could count every single one of his eyelashes.

“So don’t,” he repeats with a small smile. When he bends down to kiss you, melting against his lips is the easiest thing you’ve ever done.

The feeling of his soft lips against yours brings you back immediately to that closet. You both only realize just how much you’d been itching to pick things up from where you’d left them when the kiss gets heated in a matter of mere seconds, your need and longing for each other over the past five days evident in the way you pull each other impossibly close.

Your hands reach up, first resting on his shoulders but quickly finding their way towards the back of his neck, grabbing at the hair there almost instinctively, desperate to have something to hold onto. Meanwhile, his hands brush along your sides, moving from your hips to your waist before they encircle your middle in an attempt to bring you closer to him.

There’s no battle for dominance in your kiss, no trying to win the other over, no trying to make the other succumb - rather, you fall easily into each other’s rhythm, relishing in the other’s taste and the long awaited proximity. His mouth is soft against yours, his hair is soft under your hands, and his touch is driving you insane. You never want to stop.

After a few minutes, however, the light-headedness from a lack of air and kissing so passionately gets too much, so you draw back slightly to take a breath - but Heeseung seems to have other plans. He reacts immediately to you pulling away, and doesn’t even give you a second to breathe before pressing his lips back against yours, as though his air were your kiss.

The suddenness makes you gasp, and he takes that opportunity to brush his tongue against yours, deepening the kiss even further than before. You feel your heartbeat speed up when his hands trail back down your body, but when he lowers himself slightly to reach the back of your thighs, picking you up and setting you on the counter with ease, never once breaking the kiss, you’re pretty sure your soul actually leaves you. All you can think about is Heeseung and all you can do is continue kissing him like your life depends on it. Having your face at the same level as his now that you’re up on the counter makes it all even easier and more comfortable.

But it also means he has easier access to your neck, and as soon as he realizes that, he jumps on the opportunity. Breaking away from the kiss, he presses his lips to the corner of your own before making his way along your jawline and down your neck. Your breaths come out heavy, almost sigh-like, and you really have to keep yourself from making any noise, lest the others in the room right next to you might wake up and hear you. The feeling of Heeseung’s lips on the sensitive skin of your neck is completely new to you, but it’s an amazing kind of new - it’s the kind of new you know you won’t ever get enough of, even when it becomes familiar.

His kisses are burning hot, and yet goosebumps spread all over your body. When he finds the spot that has you taking in a sharp breath and gripping his hair tighter, Heeseung is quick to focus his attention there and there only. He nips lightly at the skin, and that has you whispering out his name. Hearing that only makes him double down on his actions; he alternates between biting down and kissing to relieve your skin, and he’s only satisfied when there’s a bright red spot in the crook of your neck. God, where did he learn how to do all that? Is this what they teach in college?!

He looks up at you with a proud smile, and he’s so cute that you almost say nothing about the very obvious mark he just left on you, but you still feel the need to scold him. “You’re gonna get us in trouble, doing things like this,” you say with a smile just as bright as his, which probably doesn’t make you look very serious, but you can’t help it - you’re on cloud nine right now.

“What if I want to get into trouble with you?” he replies, gaze fixed on your lips. You can’t say anything in return at that, so you just slightly shake your head in amusement and lean back in to kiss him again.

It seems that sharing so much oxygen has gotten to both of your heads, because this time around, the kiss is more light-hearted than intense, noses bumping into each other and teeth almost clashing from how hard the both of you are smiling, giggles spilling out through every touch of your lips.

“See? I told you!”

The sudden sound of Jake’s voice coming from the doorway forces you and Heeseung apart and your face heats up immediately at the sight of Jake, Chaeyeong and even Sunghoon all looking at the two of you with a surprised but proud expression on their faces.

He takes a small step back from you and turns his body to face them, but can’t actually bring himself to look at them; you’re not much better, smiling shyly at your lap and playing with your hands in shame at being caught. At least it wasn’t by Seeun.

Sunghoon approaches Heeseung with big steps, clapping a hand loudly against his friend’s back when he reaches him. “You finally did it, man! I’m so proud of you,” he exclaims, and actually sounds really excited.

Heeseung risks a glance your way, obviously embarrassed by his friend’s words, but it only makes you smile harder. You slightly curse yourself for not having realized Heeseung liked you back earlier - you could’ve done this such a long time ago. As Sunghoon continues congratulating Heeseung, you catch Chaeyeong’s gaze, and she winks at you. You find yourself relieved to have her on your side, but you know that sooner or later, you’ll have to talk to Seeun about this.

Indeed, the five of you head upstairs to go to bed, and before Heeseung and you go your separate ways, he catches your hand, squeezes it once tightly as if to bid you a silent ‘good night,’ then smiles his bright smile at you - and you know you’re in deep, far too deep to keep it secret for long.

(There’s an awkward conversation the next morning when Seeun asks how the hell you had gotten a hickey and Chaeyeong immediately jumps in, saying she did it. “For… practice,” she’d explained with as convincing a smile as she could. Luckily for you both, Seeun wouldn’t put it past her to actually do that, so she didn’t question it much further.)

You and Heeseung start sneaking around anyway, not quite ready to reveal your budding relationship to the world (read: Seeun).

You can’t hang out at your house, because your parents would see or hear him, and blabber innocently to the adult Lees, even if you told them not to - why couldn’t they talk to each other about their kids dating? It’s great news! Let’s have a family dinner! What? You don’t want Seeun to know? But she’s your best friend! She’ll understand, she’ll be happy for you!

You don’t need to actually have the conversation to know what your parents will say. You’ve known them for eighteen years, after all.

For more obvious reasons, you can’t hang out at his house, either - if you’re there, it means you’re with Seeun, and the risk of her finding you in her brother’s room was too great to take.

At least Heeseung has a car. But it’s not like you can go many places, anyway - the town you live in isn’t huge, chances of running into an old classmate or even a friend are high, news travels fast, word of Heeseung and you dating could easily get back to Seeun. You went to your local diner for your first secret date with Heeseung (Chaeyeong, of course, knew about it, but Seeun thought your period cramps were too bad to sleep over that night), and there, you’d seen three different people that you knew, and Heeseung two.

He didn’t seem to care much about his sister, or anyone for that matter, finding out about the two of you - in fact, if it was up to him, he’d have screamed it to the world right after you’d kissed at the party. But he respected your wishes, and even found your slight paranoia and darting eyes the whole evening somehow endearing - although he wished you’d paid more attention to him than to the other patrons in the diner. You hadn’t even noticed when he stole a whole handful of fries from your plate, or when he switched your strawberry milkshake with his vanilla one.

So he did the one thing he knew would get your attention - when you both reached his car, he led you to the backseat before you could head to the passenger side. You weren’t sure what he was doing until he had you on his lap, a devilish smirk on his lips that you only got a glimpse of before he trapped your own, slightly parted in surprise, in a kiss. There was a faint protest of “what if someone sees us” but any complaint you might have held flew away when his tongue ran over your bottom lip, asking for entry that you immediately granted. After all, you were just as desperate for more of him as he was for more of you.

You couldn’t break away from the kiss - how could you, when his lips slotted against yours so perfectly, as if you were specially crafted for one another? All you could do was hope that the fire between you two made the windows of Heeseung’s car fog up so that no one could see inside and get a glimpse of what you were doing in there.

It wasn’t any of their business anyway.

That first date opened your eyes to the many advantages of car dates. On warm summer nights like the ones you’re currently having, you can find a wide, empty space, and park there, laying down a blanket on the roof of the car and admiring the stars. You can spend hours sharing childhood anecdotes, asking Heeseung a thousand times about the moment he realized he liked you, and telling each other the things you’d always been too scared to reveal to another person. If you get hungry, you can drive to any food place and enjoy your late-night meal from your seats in the parking lot, or drive to another place with a view - although you don’t really need any sort of scenery when Heeseung sits next to you. His delighted expression as he takes his first bite or his eyes looking at you with fondness you didn’t know you could elicit from someone are some of the beautiful sights your eyes have ever been blessed with.

And after that, because innocent hand-holding and not-so-innocent thigh touches always lead to something else, most nights, you find yourselves in the backseat, basking in each other’s warmth and relishing the other’s touch. Every time, you grow needier. Every time, you need more. But so does he, and so you take and take and take just as much as you give and give and give. Even after two weeks of doing this, you’re just as on edge as before, just as reactive to any certain look he might send your way or any touch of his. You’re so relaxed, so comfortable when the two of you are talking - but as soon as you notice him glancing at your lips, or the streetlights hit him a certain way, you’re reminded of the incredible way his kiss makes you feel, and your mind fixates on it, not satisfied until you have his body close to yours.

You also quickly find out that Heeseung’s favorite drink is Coke and you almost always taste it on his lips. You even bought Coke-flavored chapstick just to have a trace of him when you can’t be together (you’re also maybe hoping that he’ll taste the soda on your own lips, and start thinking of you whenever he drinks it.

What you don’t know is that Heeseung is always thinking of you, no matter what he’s doing, anyways).

There’s also moments where you both revert back to your flustered selves, like when you stare too hard at him for his liking (he actually loves it, it just makes him really shy) or when he compliments you out of nowhere. In those moments, it’s like you forget about the many passionate kisses you’ve shared, like you’re back on one of those comfortably silent bus rides or in that sunlit room, trying to finish a puzzle together. But then his hand grazes against yours, and you’re reminded you can hold it with confidence now - you can do many things with confidence now. As the days pass, Heeseung is pleasantly surprised to see you initiate more and more of your makeout sessions, and although your impatience to get your hands on him strokes his ego, he’ll never get tired of you avoiding his gaze when he calls you pretty.

You have to make sure not to meet up too often, otherwise your continued absence would raise Seeun’s suspicion, but it’s also hard to go more than a day without spending a little time with the other. It seems that after years of unknown mutual pining, you’ve both run out of patience and can’t stand to be away from each other for too long. This is why, more than once, Heeseung has pulled you into his room just to smell your hair or bury his face in the crook of your neck or make out - but you always make him put a five-minute timer on.

Truth be told, even though you knew your feelings for Heeseung weren’t surface level, in all the times you’d daydreamed about finally being with him, you hadn’t expected it’d be so intense. Maybe that’s what happens when you find out that the other person felt the same way you had felt about them the whole time - you feel so stupid for not finding out sooner that you can’t afford to waste a second, and years of deep emotions are squeezed into mere hours of being able to see each other at a time.

It’s the hardest when your two friend groups hang out - he’s right there, but you can’t do anything. He sits next to you at the table or on the couch and pretends like everything’s completely normal, but you grow even quieter than usual because his scent and proximity drive you crazy. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy seeing you getting flustered or clearly having to hold back - something about only him having that effect on you does something to his brain.

Chaeyeong and Jake are both your allies and worst enemies. While they always cover for you, they also love to put you and Heeseung in… situations. Like “off-handedly” mentioning that game of seven minutes in heaven or that movie night (without mentioning you directly, of course, but they know what you’re thinking and you know what they’re thinking), sending you on snack runs together or somehow leaving you two behind, alone in a room.

Or proposing an evening at the pool.

During the summer, your municipal pool stays open late at night every day, and on week evenings, it doesn’t get very crowded. If you go there once the sun’s set, the atmosphere is amazing - the glow of the lights in the pool gives the whole space a bright blue hue, and the stars shine directly inside through the floor-to-ceiling glass windows. If you’re lucky, you and your friends might go on a night when you get the whole place to yourselves.

You know it’s a good idea. You know you’ll all have fun, but you also know you’ll have to pretend that seeing Heeseung half-naked with wet hair isn’t putting you on the verge of spontaneously combusting. The worst part is you don’t even need to use your imagination at all to conjure up that image - you’ve seen him in the hallway as he came out of the shower before, so you already know how devastatingly good he’ll look at the pool. You’re weak in the knees just thinking about it.

Getting ready for the pool and the drive there pass in a blur, and before you know it, you’re in the changing room, and all you need to do is dress down to your bikini and head towards the pool where a shirtless Heeseung will be waiting to greet you.

You wrap your towel around your waist in an attempt to cover yourself until you actually need to get into the water. Because not only are you freaking out about seeing Heeseung in his swimsuit, you’re also nervous about him seeing you half-naked. The last time you went to the pool together, puberty still hadn’t hit either of you, and you were still in the happy years of not being self-aware of your body or of others’. Even though summer hang-outs with his friends and yours weren’t so uncommon, you’d never gone to the pool together, and the fact that you’re now dating and you know he’ll be looking at you only adds to your nerves.

All four boys are already in the water when you, Chaeyeong and Seeun arrive, and you notice with horror that they all quiet down and study the three of you as you approach and rid yourselves of your towels, setting them on a bench before heading into the water.

Boys.

It makes Chaeyeong giggle and Seeun roll her eyes, but your whole body is burning under Heeseung’s intense gaze. You watch as his eyes slowly make their way up your body as if trying to commit each inch of you to memory. When your eyes finally lock, a smirk grows on his lips as though he couldn’t care less that you caught him so unashamedly staring. At first, you look away with a huff, but his gaze doesn’t leave you as you and the girls wade into the water towards the boys, so you fix with him a pointed glare instead.

You do your best to ignore him as you all play around in the pool, racing each other to one end and back or trying to drown each other, but that’s hard to do when he seems so set on teasing you as much as he can. He sometimes switches victims and decides to terrorize his little sister or Jake instead, but you’re still his main target. You want to be mad at him, but he seems so excited and happy that you can’t bring yourself to actually scold him. You’ve never seen him so playful, and the way he laughs carefreely, head thrown back and eyes crinkling at the edges, makes your heart swell with adoration for him.

There aren’t that many other people in the pool, mostly kids from high school, who are hogging all the inflatable pool toys - but that doesn’t pose a problem for your group. “Let’s play chicken fight!” you hear Jake say at least four times before someone actually listens to him and agrees.

Someone calls out Jay’s name - you turn your head in the direction of the voice to find that it’s Jiung, whom you vaguely recognize as one of his friends from school. From his uniform, you assume that he’s on shift as the lifeguard. Jay swims towards him and they get into conversation, conveniently leaving six people to play Jake’s game.

This is how he pairs you up - you with Heeseung (of course), him with Chaeyeong and Sunghoon with Seeun. You notice the two of them sharing a small smile, and even though it’s quite dark, you’re pretty sure you notice their faces reddening. You glance at Chaeyeong, who’s already looking at you with a surprised expression - she saw it too. Jake is too excited to play chicken fight to pay anything else attention. He explains the rules, stricter than you’d expected and many of which seem completely made up by him, and announces who will play first. Clearly, Jake takes his chicken fighting very seriously.

You and Heeseung are first up against Seeun and Sunghoon. Heeseung lowers himself underwater so you can get onto shoulders, and you hold onto his head for dear life as he comes back up, loudly releasing the breath he’d been holding in. There’s something thrilling about being so close to Heeseung around the others that you can’t help but giggle for seemingly no reason. You even bend forwards, beaming down at him as you help him push his drenched hair out of his eyes. His eyes meet yours and you giggle together - for a second, it really feels like it’s just the two of you in the pool, but then Jake calls out for you to get ready and starts the countdown for the fight to start.

It’s a bit hard to concentrate on the game when Heeseung’s large hands hold tightly onto your bare thighs, but you do your best to will any impure thoughts away and focus on getting Seeun off of Sunghoon’s shoulders. You both laugh as you grab onto each other, trying to make the other fall while the boys splash each other with water. It’s a tense game that has Jake and Chaeyeong cheering from where they sit on the edge of the pool, and your balance is thrown off a couple times (when Seeun gets into a game, she stops at nothing to win), but Heeseung’s legs are strong and he’s always quick to steady you before you can fall over.

A loud noise coming from the other kids in the pool momentarily catches your attention, but Seeun immediately pounces on you, not unlike a predator on its prey. With a yelp, you fall back into the water, bringing Heeseung down with you. When you come back to the surface, the sound of your opponents celebrating their victory is no more than a faint ring in your ears - the feeling of Heeseung wrapping his arm around your waist and the way he beams down at you, murmuring that you did a good job, make you forget about everything and everyone around you. Your gazes only stay locked like this for maybe two seconds, but you swear time stops for a bit.

Jake’s voice snaps you out of your daze, and you and Heeseung take his and Chaeyeong’s seats on the side of the pool while they get ready to challenge Seeun and Sunghoon. You’re relieved to find that you actually manage to hoist yourself up out of the water and onto the pool’s edge without making a fool of yourself in front of Heeseung.

You want to watch the game peacefully and cheer on your friends, but Heeseung is making it a bit hard. He really, really doesn’t need to be sitting this close to you. He’s leaning back on his palms, toned stomach and chest on display, which is already attractive enough, but his right thigh is also pressed flush against your left one, so much so that you know it has to be intentional. Because he’s placed his right palm close behind you, you can feel his right arm against your lower back as well, and you’re almost tempted to lean back against it.

You’re completely lost in thought, brain only focused on everywhere your body and Heeseung’s touch. It’s like he can see into your mind - he lightly pinches your hip, just underneath the string of your bikini bottoms, and you almost let out a loud gasp. But you manage to keep it down and sit up straight instead, looking at him over your shoulder like he just killed your entire family. He has the audacity to laugh.

This man really has no shame, rendering you unable to think straight in front of everyone like this. Although, to be fair, it’s also partly your fault for reacting so much to such small things.

“Hey guys,” a vaguely familiar voice calls out, and you turn your head to find Jiung and Jay walking towards you. There’s a chorus of hey Jiungs from the four in the water, but they quickly get their heads back in the game. Jay stays standing, watching his friends fight while Jiung crouches behind you and Heeseung.

“So are you guys finally together?” he asks excitedly, a genuine grin on his face, and both you and Heeseung choke on your own saliva. Did everyone know about your mutual crushes before you two did?!

You exchange a glance with Heeseung but quickly look away, suddenly finding great interest in Chaeyeong’s and Seeun’s tactics to make each other fall over.

Heeseung’s eyes dart between your face and Jiung’s as he answers, as if scared he might say one wrong word and offend you in some way. “Um, yeah, we are. But we’re not really… telling people, I guess.”

Jiung gasps in delight, clasping Heeseung’s shoulder in what you guess is a congratulatory gesture. “Keeping it lowkey. Got it. Congrats, you guys. Jay told me about you, like, three years ago, and I’ve been weirdly invested ever since,” he admits honestly, and you try hard to fight back the grin threatening to spread on your lips. You’d never even spoken to Choi Jiung before.

From your peripheral, you can make out Heeseung turning his head to glare at his friend. “Thanks a lot, Jay,” he mumbles.

A loud splash catches everyone’s attention; Chaeyeong has fallen off of Jake’s shoulders, and the other two are celebrating their second win in a row. Your friend just laughs, getting her long hair out of her face, but Jake is practically fuming.

“You guys make a pretty good team, I guess,” he says, and even though it’s supposed to be a compliment, he really doesn’t sound happy about it.

“We do, don’t we?” Sunghoon echoes, looking up at Seeun with a smile.

“We do,” she answers with a giggle.

A giggle.

Seeun didn’t giggle. Unless…

You lock eyes with Chaeyeong. She looks just as surprised as you feel. You tilt your head towards the two lovebirds, who seem lost in their own world, Sunghoon jumping around in the water with Seeun still on his shoulders and laughing. Chaeyeong nods fervently, as if screaming, “I know, I’m seeing it too!”

Seeun didn’t giggle, unless she had a crush on someone. You very much remember the day in freshman year when her middle school crush Kim Sunwoo, a senior at the time, picked up her locker keys that she had dropped in the hallway. The way she turned around when he tapped on her shoulder, awestruck as he smiled, handing her her keys, was straight out of a movie. She blushed and giggled to herself about it for the next two weeks.

You turn to look at Heeseung, but he’s busy listening to Jake, Jay and Jiung as they come up with a strategy to make the victors lose next time around. You internally roll your eyes at their obliviousness, but at least now you know why Heeseung had never figured out you liked him back.

“C’mon Jiung, let’s go beat their arrogant asses,” Jay then prompts, making his friend chuckle and get into the water. They wade their way towards the others, and when Jiung gets on Jay’s shoulders, Seeun’s game face is back on. Your friend can be quite scary.

“Aren’t you supposed to be watching the pool, lifeguard boy?” Sunghoon taunts like a three-year-old, although you’re not sure that “lifeguard boy” is much of an insult. It’s generally accepted that lifeguards are pretty cool.

“Everyone left, dumbass,” Jiung answers plainly. “It’s just us.”

You all look around, and indeed, the high school kids are gone, which means you have the whole place to yourselves.

Seeun looks back at Jiung with a smirk. “Good for you. At least those kids won’t see how much of a loser you are when we destroy you and Jay.”

Chaeyeong and Jake ‘ooh’ at her threat while you and Heeseung watch amusedly. You can’t help but think it isn’t that serious, but seeing your friends so into the game is quite fun.

“Bring it on!” Jiung exclaims, and neither team lets Jake count down before they start attacking each other. The poor guy tries to stop Seeun and Jiung from playing so dirty, reminding them that hair-pulling and armpit-tickling are forbidden, but the two really couldn’t care less, so he quickly gives up trying to make them abide by the rules.

Chaeyeong comes to sit next to you and nudges your shoulder with her own to get your attention. “What do you think’s happening with Seeun and Sunghoon? It’s definitely new.”

You almost hear the boys’ necks crack as they whip their heads to look at you. “Something’s happening with Seeun and Sunghoon?” they whisper-scream at the same time. You’re glad the topic subjects are too engrossed in their game to hear anything.

You chuckle at their reaction but Chaeyeong rolls her eyes. “Obviously. They’ve been acting like teenagers this whole evening.”

“They are teenagers,” Heeseung says with a slight frown as he watches his sister and his friend. “They’re eighteen and nineteen.”

Chaeyeong tuts. “That’s not important. Plus, you really don’t get to anything, Heeseung, when you’ve been going around fucking your sister’s best-”

Jake starts immediately howling of laughter, but all you want in that moment is to let yourself drown in the water and never have to face your friend ever again.

Heeseung’s eyes are wide and his hands are frantically shaking ‘no’ as incoherent protests spill out of his lips. “I- no- we haven’t, we’re not-” He sighs defeatedly when Jake just laughs harder and Chaeyeong joins in.

She knows you guys haven’t done anything of that sort yet, you’ve been telling her - or rather she’s been making you tell her - everything that happens between you and Heeseung. She’s just teasing you, and it’s really working, and you hate her for it. You fix her with a glare that does nothing to make her laughter stop. When you look at Heeseung, his eyebrows have furrowed deeper, and a light blush has spread all over his face, ears and even his neck. With a small pout on his lips, he’s never looked more adorable. Nothing beats the sight of a flustered and slightly mad Heeseung.

His hands have returned to his lap, his right one fidgeting with the hem of his swim trunks. In a moment of boldness, you decide to take it in yours, giving it a reassuring squeeze as you smile at him - to be honest, you were also slightly amused by Chaeyeong’s words. She was right; he really couldn’t say anything about his sister liking one of his friends when he’d made out with you so often.

You notice with satisfaction that he can’t keep eye contact and that the color on his face deepens.

You all turn back to the tense game in front of you, noting with surprise that Seeun actually seems to have the upper hand over Jiung. She must be a seasoned chicken fighter, because she loses neither her balance nor her grip on Jiung once. The older boy doesn’t even yelp when he falls into the water, as if he’d seen it coming. Beaming proudly, Seeun gets off of Sunghoon’s shoulders and the two share a quick celebratory hug before shaking their opponents’ hands. The four of them swim their way towards you and you all hang out for a while, letting the fighters regain their energy.

“There’s something I’m not really supposed to do…” Jiung then says, and chuckles when he feels seven pairs of eyes watching him intently. “But I have the keys to the slides, and I know how to operate them.” Everyone cheers before he can even finish his sentence, and Jake and Chaeyeong are quick to get out of the water and run upstairs to the entrance of the slides. Jiung hurries to get the keys and follow them, the rest of you close behind.

Your heart starts beating loudly as soon as you place your foot on the first step. You try to ignore it - you’d never been a fan of attractions like big water slides or roller coasters, but you should get over it one day or another. Might as well try today.

That’s what you keep telling yourself, but once you’ve reached the slides and Jiung gets them running, the loud gush of water falling rapidly makes you feel like you’re going to faint. Seeun’s screams as she goes down, even though they’re from excitement, don’t help your lightheadedness.

When Jake pushes himself down the slide, you clear your throat to speak. You hadn’t even realized how dry your throat had gotten, and the shakiness in your voice takes you aback. “Um, I think I’m gonna sit this one out, guys. I’m not feeling too well.”

Everyone turns to you with a worried expression, and from your peripheral, you notice Heeseung’s hand jolting up towards you, but he stops himself before he actually touches you.

“Oh yeah, I forgot you don’t like slides,” Chaeyeong says with a pout.

“There’s nothing to be scared of! This is totally safe,” Jiung tries to reassure, but for some reason, his eagerness makes you even more doubtful.

“We can go together,” Heeseung suddenly offers. Judging from his expression, he seems surprised at his own words, as if he’d spoken out loud without realizing it. A chorus of agreement rises from the group, and Heeseung’s smile as he looks down at you makes you think that it might be okay to try - although you’re not sure if that’s because you want to get over your fear of slides, or if it’s because the idea of Heeseung’s arms wrapped tightly around your waist and keeping you safe is very alluring.

“O-okay,” you answer, and his smile widens.

You wait until everyone except for Jiung has gone down. Heeseung stands behind you the whole time, a calming hand on your shoulder and the other playing with your drying hair, and his presence actually does wonders to soothe you. When it’s your turn, you sit down right at the top of the slide, trying not to freak out from the feeling of the gushes of water underneath your thighs. For once, Heeseung’s touch as he sits behind you, encaging your body between his legs and his arms, is reassuring rather than fatally heart-fluttering. Now you understand what people mean when they say they feel like nothing can hurt them as long as they’re in their lover’s arms.

“You ready?” Jiung calls out. You’re too nervous to make a peep, only able to nod, so Heeseung answers for you.

“We are.” Just before Jiung can give Heeseung a push, the boy behind you bends down to whisper in your ear. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep you safe, okay?”

You hum back but the faint sound is drowned out by the noise around you as you’re whisked down the slide. It’s so loud and so fast that you’re sure you’d have been screaming like you were being murdered had Heeseung not been there to calm you down. The grip you have on his hands probably hurts, but he doesn’t complain, just laughs from the adrenaline the ride is giving him, and his calmness manages to make your heart stay calm.

You hadn’t even realized you’d squeezed your eyes shut until he told you to open them. The previous flashing lights that had overwhelmed you even with your eyes closed were over, and when you blink your eyes open, you’re fascinated to find that there is no top over the slide, letting the stars shine down on you in all their glory. The feeling of the night breeze against your skin is surprisingly refreshing, and you actually let out a ‘wow,’ all of your previous anxiety slowly leaving your body. This time, when Heeseung giggles against your ear, you actually join him.

Your friends are the sweetest, and when you reach the end of the slide and fall into the water, they’re all clapping and cheering for you as if you’d just come first place in a marathon. You discern a sort of inquisitive look on Seeun’s face as she looks at you and her brother, but you decide to not pay it too much attention and swim away from the slide for Jiung’s arrival.

“So? Wasn’t too bad, right?” Heeseung asks with a grin, his hand sneakily finding yours underwater.

“No, it was nice, actually. Doesn’t mean I’m going a second time, though,” you reply, and he chuckles. You force yourself to look away from his smiling face because you know how easily you can get lost in his gaze, and you’d rather not raise any more suspicion. You swim to the edge of the pool, hoisting yourself up out of the water so you can dry off a bit in the night air.

Jiung whoops his whole way down, and as soon as he comes back to the surface, he asks who wants to go again. Everyone except for you and Heeseung raise their hands. “You’re not going again?” you ask him, eyebrows raised in surprise.

He’s still smiling, and you wished it was just the two of you so you could kiss that pretty smile right off his face. “No, one time was enough for me. I’ll stay here with you.”

This, of course, elicits an obnoxious chorus of ‘ooh’s from your friends. “O-kay,” Chaeyeong says in a singsong voice.

“We’ll leave you two to it, then,” Jake adds with a wiggle of his eyebrows. You hadn’t known you had such murderous tendencies in you until you met this boy.

When you catch Seeun’s gaze, she’s looking at you with slightly raised eyebrows. For a split second, you feel like you’re gonna crumble - she’s gonna figure it out, and she’ll hate you and never speak to you again, and- but then she smiles, just a tiny hint of a smile, and you think that maybe, just maybe, this might be fine after all.

You release a breath you hadn’t even realized you were holding when she walks away with the others, but a second breath gets caught in your throat right away when Heeseung crosses his arms over your lap, and you realize it’s gonna be just you two for a little while now. It’s exactly what you had wished for not even a minute ago, but now that it’s actually happening, your heart starts beating wildly once again.

“I’m proud of you,” he says quietly, looking up at you with those big brown eyes you adore so much.

A grin breaks out on your face. He closes his eyes, sighing contentedly as your hand rakes through his dark locks. “Thank you,” you reply just as quietly. ��I would never have done something like that on my own.”

He opens his eyes again. The way he looks at you makes you wonder what he sees in your eyes that has him so captivated. You just hope he can’t hear the loudness of your beating heart.

He presses himself closer to you, somewhat forcing your thighs open to accommodate his body in between them, and wraps his arms around your waist. Even if he can’t hear your heartbeat, he can surely hear your shaky intake of breath as he places a soft kiss to the top of your thigh before resting his cheek against it, closing his eyes like he’s planning on napping right there. Your fingers are still in his hair but your brain has stopped computing, so they stay immobile. You try to stay calm so as not to disturb the position Heeseung is in, but your stomach has never been so swarmed by butterflies as now.

Somehow, this feeling is even scarier than going down the slide - maybe because you knew the slide would end at some point. This feels like it might consume you whole and stay with you for the rest of your life. The worst part is you don’t even know exactly what it is that you’re feeling. But it’s everywhere. It makes your fingertips sizzle with electricity, it makes your head almost ache, and it twists your insides all around, but it’s also weirdly pleasant.

It makes you want more.

You can’t believe one simple kiss on your thigh is making you react this way, but now that you’ve felt it, it’s as though you might die if you don’t get to have it over and over again; you already know that a second or a third time won’t be enough either.

“Heeseung?” you call, his name coming out like a question, and his head whips up so quickly you think he might have been waiting for you to say something.

“Yeah?” he replies, something that sounds like anticipation making his voice come out as a whisper.

You weren’t even completely sure what it was you wanted to say, but the way Heeseung looks up at you eradicates any train of thought you’d had. It’s a different type of gaze than before, something you’d only gotten glimpses of during particularly heated make-out sessions but that Heeseung had always seemed to reign in. Hooded eyes that are darker than usual, that seem to be in some sort of a daze, giving the impression that he isn’t quite thinking straight. You’re sure you’ve also had that look in your eyes more than once, when Heeseung’s hand brushed along a particularly sensitive spot on your back or when he absent-mindedly thrusted his hips against yours as you straddled his lap in the backseat, making you moan into his mouth as he hurriedly apologized for getting carried away. You didn’t know how to tell him you were ready for whatever it was he wanted, so you always shushed him with an “it’s okay” and resumed kissing him feverishly. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t press yourself down against his bulge - that neither of you mentioned, but both knew was there - just to get a reaction out of him once in a while, and to get that fire-like feeling in your belly you were starting to crave more and more.

You try to push those far-from-innocent thoughts away from your mind and come up with something to say, but then someone disturbs your peace. Indeed, you hear Jake before you see him. “Heeseung and Y/N, you better not be smooching when I get there!”

Heeseung sighs deeply, a real, pained, frustrated sigh, and you’re glad you’re not the only one going crazy because of your friends. It’s like everyone has forgotten that you and Heeseung are supposed to be a secret. Reluctantly, he detaches himself from you and makes his way next to you, body still in the water but forearms resting on the ground next to the pool.

Another hour or so passes before stomachs start growling from too much fooling around in the water and you all agree to go home. Sadly, there’s nothing open so late in the night in your town, and none of you can be asked to drive all the way to the nearest city for food. On the whole drive home, Chaeyeong bombards Seeun with questions about Sunghoon. Seeun tries to avoid it at first, looking out the window to hide her growing blush, but once the two girls are similar in that once they have set their mind on something, you know they’ll get it. It only takes two minutes of arguing for Seeun to start spilling.

“Well… I’ve known him for a really long time, right? Him and Jay became friends right away, just like the three of us did. I’ve always associated him with Heeseung, so I never thought of him that way…”

“What way?” Chaeyeong cuts in, although she knows exactly what Seeun means.

“Like- like more than a friend,” Seeun explains, voice getting quieter the more she speaks. Chaeyeong squeals in excitement and you chuckle.

“So what happened?” Chaeyeong prompts, and you almost want to remind her to focus on the road. You don’t need to get into a car accident over Seeun’s love life.

Seeun sighs like she’s exasperated by Chaeyeong, but you catch her small smile in the rearview mirror and you know she’s actually happy to be talking about this with you guys. “So, you know that movie night we had?” she starts, waiting for the two of you to nod. You try not to think about what you did on that movie night. “Well, we were sitting next to each other, which usually would’ve been totally fine, right, but for some reason, it made me feel super nervous that night. Like I was hyper-aware of his presence next to me. I could actually smell him, and oh my God, he smells so good, I don’t know how I’d never realized that-”

You and Chaeyeong burst into laughter at that, and Seeun can’t help but join in. “Smelling good is definitely attractive,” you chime in, thinking about how intoxicating it is to have your nose buried in the crook of Heeseung’s neck and get a whiff of his scent.

“And, like, I’ve always known Sunghoon was handsome, right, I’m not blind, but I swear I never felt a particular type of way about him before then, just ‘cause I always saw him as one of my loser brother’s loser friends,” she says, and you make a mental note to repeat that to Heeseung later, “And at first I thought I was going crazy, that I was just feeling that way ‘cause we were sitting so close together in a dark room and everything, but then our knees touched, and I was like, ‘okay, I shouldn’t be losing my shit just ‘cause our knees touched,’ but I was losing my shit-”

She’s retelling the story in such a dramatic, un-Seeun-like and very Chaeyeong-like way that you can’t stop laughing, your stomach almost starting to hurt. “Which is why I went to bed during the second movie. And after that, I was thinking about him so much it was so weird, and I thought I was doomed ‘cause I didn’t wanna have a crush on my brother’s best friend, right?” she says, and Chaeyeong’s and your eyes meet for a second in the mirror. “But then you know that fair thing they had in town last week? You guys wouldn’t volunteer with me, but he was volunteering too, so we spent, like, three days in a row together, and it was really, really fun. We would spend the whole day together, eat together, even hang out afterwards and everything. And then we started texting, and today was the first time we saw each other again since then, actually…” She takes a deep breath there and laughs, as if relieved to have finally let it all out.

“This is amazing news. Absolutely fantastic news,” Chaeyeong beams. “How come you didn’t tell us sooner?”

“I really wanted to but I was scared I was making up a bunch of stuff in my mind and he still saw me as nothing more than his best friend’s sister. If it had been someone else I would’ve told you guys immediately, but I don’t know, I was already trying to wrap my head around the fact that I was starting to like this guy I’ve known my whole life, so I wasn’t ready to talk about it.”

If it had been someone else I would’ve told you guys immediately. You know that feeling all too well. It makes you think that you should just go ahead and tell Seeun about you and Heeseung, but after years of conditioning yourself that she could never find out about your crush on her brother, and now that you’re dating him, it’s not easy to just come out with it.

Your attention had drifted away from the conversation for a bit but you tune back in when Chaeyeong mentions college. “Plus, he goes to our state university, right? Just like us! That means you guys don’t have to worry about long distance, same for Heeseung and Y/N-” Chaeyeong’s eyes widen immediately when she realizes what she did.

“Heeseung and Y/N?” Seeun echoes, searching for your face in the rearview mirror.

Once more, you can thank your friend’s impeccable bullshitting abilities. “Oh, no, I just meant that even though she’s going to a different college than us, she’ll still know someone there. Not that they wouldn’t have to worry about long distance like you and Sunghoon.”

“Right,” Seeun answers, eyes still fixated on you in the mirror. An uncomfortable beat passes before she speaks again. “But is there… is there something happening between you and Heeseung, Y/N?”

You’d seen the question coming, but it still somehow manages to punch you in the stomach. Before you can even think of a way to tell your friend the truth in the most delicate way possible, your reflexes and old habits kick in. “No,” you simply reply, the lie coming to you way too easily. You hope she doesn’t notice the slight tremble in your voice - you’re definitely not as good a liar as Chaeyeong. “I mean, we’ve gotten closer this summer, but that’s about it.”

Chaeyeong stays silent, her eyes on the road. You’re less than a minute away from Seeun’s house, but you wish you could just get there already and have this conversation be over.

“Okay, if you say so,” she says, not sounding fully convinced. “But, you know, if there was, I wouldn’t- I wouldn’t be mad. A little weirded out, maybe, but not mad.” She’s looking at you so intently as she says this that you think she must know, otherwise she wouldn’t be saying all this. It’s like she’s asking you to just tell her, but still, you can’t bring yourself to do it. As if you’ve dug your own grave and have to lie in it.

Heeseung’s car is already in the driveway when you reach the Lees’ house, and he must have already gone up to his room because he isn’t in the kitchen or in the living room. You feel a slight pang of disappointment in your heart at the thought of not seeing him again tonight, even though it’s already so late, but you have a feeling you’ll stay up for hours thinking about his warm hands and his lips.

“Shower then food?” Seeun proposes when you’re all done taking your shoes off. You all nod and head up to her room. Just then, your phone buzzes with a text from Heeseung. Then another, and another, and the sound piques your friends’ interest.

“Who’s spamming you?” Chaeyeong asks, but she figures it out as soon as she sees the lovestruck smile on your face.

“Oh, just a groupchat I’m in,” you reply without looking up from your phone.

hee: Can you drop by my room? hee: Find an excuse to leave and come and see me :D hee: I want to see you. hee: Oh sorry about the period I know you don’t like that hee: I want to see you <;3 hee: !!!!!!!!! hee: Please you: be there in a min hee you: i wanna see u too hee: K hee: :DDD

“Y/N, you wanna go first?” Seeun asks, snapping you out of it.

“Huh?”

“The shower. You wanna go first?” she repeats, amused by your sudden weird behavior.

“Oh, actually, um, I remembered my mom wanted to go to the farmers’ market at, like, nine tomorrow, so I should probably just sleep at home,” you say, which is actually true. You’ve never been so thankful for your mom’s love of organic and local produce. Thankfully, your friends also know about it, so they don’t question it at all and just wish you a good night.

Little do they know that you’re actually headed straight for Heeseung’s bedroom rather than your own. Normally, your paranoid brain would tell you that your friends, especially Seeun, might question why they didn’t hear the sound of the front door closing, but you doubt they’ll actually be paying attention to it.

You make a beeline for Heeseung’s room, not wanting to be caught by one of the girls as they go to the bathroom. Heeseung seems to be waiting for you, because you’ve barely knocked on his door and he’s already taking your hand, pulling you into his room.

It’s the first time you’ve been here since you were a kid, and you’re sure there’s many things on the walls and shelves to pick Heeseung’s brain about, any and every piece of himself interesting to you, but there’s one thing that stands out to you; it’s just the two of you in here. It makes your heart skip a beat in anticipation.

“Where’s Jake?”

Heeseung smiles shyly and looks down at your question. “I sort of, um, kicked him out.” You whip your head towards him at his words, looking at him with wide eyes. He chuckles. “I made him sleep over at Jay’s house. I really wanted to sneak you in here tonight.”

And just to make sure you really understand what he means by that, he fixes you with a look that can’t be misinterpreted. His eyes rake up and down your body as he approaches you, his smirk growing when he sees the obvious effect it has on you. He places his hands on your hips and he’s close enough for you to see how dilated his pupils are. He almost looks hungry, like he could just eat you whole, and it makes you weak in the knees. Heat rises to your face when you think about what must be going on in his head, especially since it’s probably not far from the thoughts that have been plaguing you for a while now. Unconsciously, you bring your legs closer together, and the way his eyes dip down then back up to your face with an arch of his brow like he knows what you’re thinking drives you slightly insane.

You don’t realize you’ve been staring at him until he tilts his head at you, an amused expression on his face. “What is it, doll?” he asks, but his tone makes you inclined to think he knows exactly what it is.

You also know, but you don’t know how to put it into words. So, instead, you take a step closer to him and wrap your arms around his waist, burying your face in the dip between his neck and shoulder. He smells like chlorine and something that’s entirely his, and you swear you’ve never smelled anything so intoxicating in your life. “Heeseung,” you murmur, voice muffled as your lips move against his skin.

“Yes?” he answers in that same amused, knowing tone. Your clear-mindedness starts to slip away from you as it often does when you’re near him.

When you repeat his name, this time more whiny as you wrap your arms tighter and bury your face deeper, he chuckles softly, a low, deep sound that sends electrifying shivers right down your spine. He places both hands on the sides of your face to make you lean back and look up at him. He can’t help but chuckle again at the pout on your lips, although your slightly hooded eyes make his stomach twist into the familiar tight knot of desire.

“I was gonna take a shower, if you’d like to join me,” he says, a glint of mischief playing in his eyes, and your own widening immediately at his words, or rather at the meaning behind them.

“A shower?!” you whisper-yell back.

He just laughs again and nods. “Mh-hm. We can keep our swimsuits on.” He looks down at you, at your eyes that are still wide, but now more out of anticipation than shock, at the way they seem to search for reassurance in his own. You seem to find what you’re looking for, because you nod.

“We just have to wait until Seeun and Chaeyeong are done, okay? I told Seeun to text me when the bathroom’s free.”

A small smile tugs at the corners of his lips when you nod again. He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, then bends down to close the distance between the two of you, just as he’s done many times before, by pressing his lips to yours. He wants to tell you that he’s fine with whatever you want to do; that you can go as fast or as slow as you want; that no matter what, he’ll always be there to hold you and kiss you and call you pretty.

But he’s not the best with words, so he opts for kissing you gently instead, probably the slowest kiss you’ve ever shared, as if he's scared you might suddenly run away from him and he'll lose your warmth.

He’s never been as relieved as when he feels you not only reciprocating the kiss, but deepening it, asking for more when you start to whine into his mouth and slightly claw at his back. It takes everything in him to pull away from you, but there’s more comfortable ways to make out, including ones that don’t involve you bending your neck backwards trying to reach his lips, so he tugs at your hand for you to follow him. “C’mere,” he says, leading you to his bed. He sits on the edge, and, with a smile you can only describe as devilish, pats his lap for you to straddle.

You oblige immediately, of course, and even though you’ve done this many times before, it feels like the backseat of his car and his bed are worlds apart. It feels charged with an intimacy you two haven’t quite shared before, like you’re finally letting go of everything that might’ve been holding you back before and you’re now ready to take a step further together.

At least, that’s how you feel, but if the way he sighs into your mouth as soon as you press your lips to his, and the way his hands roam your back like trying not to leave an inch of your body untouched are anything to go by, then it seems like he feels the same way.

There’s a desperation to the kiss that makes your whole body feel like it’s on fire. Your hands quickly make their way to what seems their favorite place, Heeseung’s hair, and your fingers rake through it, gripping at the strands like you might float into space if you let go of him. His hands slowly make their way down your back until they reach your ass, sneaking underneath your loose shorts to grab at the skin underneath. He brings you closer to him, pressing you down onto his bulge, and it hits such a sweet spot between your thighs that you can’t fight back against the moan that makes its way out of your lips.

Heeseung is quick to shush you, and for some reason, it only makes the fire in your belly burn harder. “Shh, you have to be quiet, doll. Can you do that for me?” He continues to guide your movements against him, rubbing over that spot over and over again. Your forehead falls against his shoulder, and you know you can’t answer him, because if a sound comes out of mouth, it’ll be a moan, and not words.

But Heeseung isn’t happy with that. “Hm? I asked you a question, Y/N.”

What he is happy with is the whimper you let out at his words. “Y-yes, I’ll be quiet,” you breathe out like even saying a few words is too complicated for you.

“That’s a good girl,” he says, and even though you were already a mess before, these are the words that really do you in. With a small whine, you wrap your arms tight around his neck and bury your face where his jawline meets his ear, hoping that any sound coming from your mouth will be muffled there. You know there’s no point trying to kiss him right now; you won’t be able to focus on that and grind on him at the same time.

Truth be told, Heeseung has little to no idea what he’s doing. He’s never gotten this far with anyone before, and now that he’s assumed a more dominant position, since that’s what he’d gathered you’d like from your backseat sessions, he’s scared he might have made this a lot harder for him. He wants to do his best for you and guide you through what he knows are your first sexual or even romantic experiences, but the thing is, this is also the first time for him. It’s the first time he’s had this intense, almost ravaging craving to go further with someone, to touch and be touched and just cherish every single inch of someone’s body.

All he knows about sex, he’s gathered from porn, conversations with his guy friends, and Yunjin’s “spicy” romance novels. He has enough critical thinking skills to know that none of these are a hundred percent reliable sources, but he figured that the novels would be the closest to what women actually like.

He’d been scared sex and everything around it would be the most complicated puzzle he’d have to put together in his life. But in reality, he’s been relieved to find everything has come fairly easily. He just has to pay attention to the things you like; you like it when he takes the lead, so he does; you like it when he compliments you, so he does; you like it when he presses kisses all over your face and neck, so he does. He knows there’s still many things you like that he hasn’t found out about, but he’s more than eager to learn about each and every one of them. Apparently, you really like whatever it is the two of you are doing right now, so much so that he can feel your legs start to shake and can hear you containing your moans, so he keeps on doing it.

As for him? Well, he likes you. His biggest turn-on is seeing you turned on. Seeing your swollen lips and heavy eyelids after a make-out session, hearing your small moans and heavy breathing, feeling you rest your body against his and letting him make you feel good, like you’re doing right now, that’s what gets him going. He’s always so focused on your pleasure that he could almost forget about his own. So, it’s only when you announce through broken moans that you think you’re gonna cum that he realizes he’s dangerously close to finishing too. “That’s okay, baby, cum for me,” he coos, and that’s all you need to come undone.

He really wants to keep it in, really doesn’t want to jizz inside his pants like a highschooler, but it’s to no avail. In his defense, it’s really, really hard not to when you’re holding onto him like your life depends on it and when his name, sounding so pretty on your lips, is the only thing you can say as you cum against him. It’s something right out of a young Heeseung wet dream, and now that present-day Heeseung is actually experiencing it, he can say with pride that this is much better than a dream.

You both take a few seconds to come down from your highs, the first that you’ve shared together. It feels surreal. When you find the strength to lift your head and face Heeseung again, the look on his face is so hot, you think you might cum again from the sight alone. Hair sticking to his forehead, already-plump lips completely red, wet and swollen and curled up into a small smile. You press your foreheads together and laugh for no reason other than you couldn’t get happier than this. Your smile doesn’t leave your lips as you kiss him again. You’re only eighteen, but you don’t think life gets much better than this.

Then Heeseung’s phone dings with a text from Seeun: bathroom’s free. Heeseung looks at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes that wasn’t there a minute ago. “Wanna go get cleaned up?”

You giggle at his renewed eagerness and nod, letting him take your hand and guide you stealthily to the bathroom he and Seeun share. Thank God for locks.

Once inside, he lets go of your hand and turns on the mirror light rather than the bright, harsh overhead one, giving the room a more comfortable atmosphere. There’s a neck-scratching moment where neither you or Heeseung know what to do, your eyes darting nervously around the room, but it passes by when Heeseung turns around, quickly strips down to his swimming trunks once more and gets into the shower. He has his back next to you when he turns it on and finds his desired temperature, but he leaves the shower door open for you - you know he’s waiting for you to get in with him, but you’re stuck in place as you watch the water fall rapidly down his back and his muscles slightly shift out of relaxation.

You’d seen him half-naked and wet just an hour ago, and it’d already messed with your head, but this was so much worse. Maybe it was the heat slowly rising in the room, maybe it was the fact that you could join him at any moment and get to touch him, whatever it was, it was making it hard to breathe. You practically choke when he turns back around, facing you and smiling when he realizes you haven’t moved an inch.

“You’re not coming?” he asks quietly, and you know you can’t just stand and stare forever - you’ve done too much of that already. Your heart beats like crazy as you pull your sweatshirt over your head, then rid yourself of your shorts, because although he’d already seen you in your swimsuit, it’s nerve-wracking to undress right when you know he’s watching.

His smile hasn’t left his face when you step in and close the shower door, and he’s looking at you so intently that you have to focus on something other than his eyes, so you settle on his collarbones. Everything about him is pretty, you realize.

You suck in a breath when he places one of his hands on your waist, then the other, and makes you get under the water with him. It’s the perfect temperature for you, not too hot that it burns but just enough to make your skin tingle, and you wonder how many more of these small things you have in common.

“Y/N…” he says quietly, just loud enough for you to hear over the sound of the shower. You finally dare to meet his eyes. “Have I ever told you how pretty you are?” he asks with a smile, and just like that, you have to look away again, resting your forehead against his shoulder to hide your flustered expression from him. Receiving a compliment from Heeseung is one thing, being in the shower with him is another; both happening at the same time is too much for you to handle. Somehow cumming in his lap wasn’t enough to rid you completely of your shyness around him. He chuckles at your reaction and wraps an arm around your waist while his other hand caresses up and down your back.

“You have,” you manage to reply even though his touch is close to making your mind go blank.

“Well, let me say it again.” He bends down so that his mouth is right by your ear, lips tickling it when he speaks next. “You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

His words paired with his low voice make your core throb. You try not to gulp when he stands back up to his full height and smirks down at you - even though it’s impossible that he’s grown any taller in the last hour, it still feels like he towers over you much more than before.

He doesn’t say anything more, your reaction apparently enough to satisfy him, and he reaches behind you for the body wash. He squeezes a dollop of it into his palm, and you think he’ll clean himself up, so you let out a small ‘oh’ of surprise when his hands touch the area above your chest, then start to spread the gel all over your arms, back and stomach. You watch as he lowers himself to lather your legs in the product as well, and you’re not sure why the sight of Heeseung looking up at you from this position makes your heart flutter so much. The illusion is slightly broken, though, when he decides to press a kiss to your stomach but immediately regrets it. “Soap,” he simply says before rinsing his lips with the shower water.

You laugh and shake your head at him. “You’re so cute sometimes, you know that?” you say, the words tumbling out of your mouth naturally, and press your lips to his in a chaste kiss. When you lean back, Heeseung is staring right at you, stunned.

“I’m the one who does that,” he says, a light tone of protest to his voice.

“Does what?”

“Compliments you then kisses you,” he answers with a pout, but it only makes you laugh more.

You wrap your arms around him, pressing yourself flush against him and letting the water fall on top of your bodies. Before you can even comprehend the thought forming in your head at that moment, your lips betray you and words fall out of them against your will. “God, I love you so much.”

In the split second after you’ve said that, the realization hits you and your whole body stiffens. Slowly, your heart threatening to jump out of your chest, you lean back to see Heeseung’s reaction. He looks down at you in a mix of shock and pure, unfiltered happiness, eyebrows raised high but his smile reaches his ears. “You love me, huh?”

“Heeseung, I-”

“Good, because I love you too, Y/N.”

All the dread you felt rushes out of your body and is immediately replaced with relief. In the minute you’d realized you actually loved Heeseung and didn’t just have a big fat crush on him, you had the reassurance that he loved you, too. Life really can’t get any better than this.

Your lips find each other like second nature, but kissing is hard when you’re both so high on your confessions that you can’t stop giggling. You feel your whole body melt for him when he starts peppering kisses all over your face, saying “I love you” in between each peck.

You take his face in your hands to steady his head and kiss him on the lips, a deep, firm kiss that has him wrapping his arms tightly around you and bringing you close to him. It’s like a switch flips inside of him, and all his playfulness transforms into intensity, and suddenly all he can think about is your lips on his and your body against his. You try not to gulp at the feeling of his growing hardness pressed against your stomach. What you’d done on the bed earlier had opened up a whole new world of sensation for the both of you to discover, and you found that you were already craving it again.

There’s not much to be said in a situation like this; you both know what the other is thinking, it’s just a matter of who will act first. Usually, you’d rely on Heeseung to make the first move, or you’d do it yourself if you were feeling impatient; but right now, he seems to be enjoying making you squirm and taking his sweet time, hands roaming your back like he doesn’t know you’re desperate for more.

So you do what you’re usually too shy to do, and ask for what you want directly. “Heeseung, please,” you plead quietly against his lips, eyes shut tight as if in pain.

You can feel the smile that grows on his lips at your words. “Please, what?”

You take a shaky breath in and press wet kisses along his jawline before you answer. “Make me feel good, please.”

“Anything you want, doll.”

You can feel the blood pumping through your veins as you wait for whatever Heeseung will do next, but for some reason, he’s decided not to do anything in a hurry. He slows the kiss down as his fingers trail up and down your sides at snail’s pace, and you have half a mind to just tell him to hurry up already, but there’s something delicious about being on edge like this, desperately waiting for your release.

One of his hands then makes its way to your back, finding the string of your bikini top and playing with it. “Can I take this off?” he asks, voice barely audible over the sound of the water. As soon as you nod, he unties it and pulls the fabric away from your body, letting it drop at his feet and leaving your upper body completely naked for him. Your cheeks blaze under his fascinated eyes, but in that moment, his gaze really does make you feel like the prettiest girl in the world.

His other hand that had patiently rested on your waist makes its way up your front until it reaches your breasts.

You hadn’t even known your nipples were this sensitive until his palm brushes against one of them, making your body jolt of its own accord. Heeseung seems to like that reaction, so he starts playing with it more, twisting it lightly between his fingers, eliciting moans from you (that you try to keep down, still conscious of the fact that anyone in the house might hear you if you were too loud) and making your back arch involuntarily.

As his hand drifts to your other breast to pay your other nipple some well-deserved attention, you decide that Heeseung deserves as much attention as he’s giving you right now. Slowly, almost innocently, your hand snakes its way down his chest and abs to his trunks. You palm him over the fabric, hoping it makes him feel as good as his hand on your breast makes you feel. As his ministrations continue, your breathing gets shallower and shallower, but you’re glad to be having a similar effect on him - he rests his forehead against yours as a breathy moan escapes his lips, and you know you’re not doing as bad a job as you think you might be.

“Y/N,” he breathes out after a minute of this. You hum. “I think my self-control is starting to wear out,” he says, voice shaky as his hand makes its way down your side. His touch burns more than the scorching shower water.

“Good,” you simply reply, and press your lips to his. You can let go is what you’re trying to convey through your kiss as it turns hungrier, needier, more impatient.

Apparently he gets the message, because he’s quick to push you against the shower wall, left hand behind your head and the other holding on tight to your hip. He presses himself against you, letting you know just how much he wants you, and you can’t help the whimper that escapes your lips. This seems to spur him on - so slowly it hurts, his hand makes its way from your hips to the front of your panties. You’ve been waiting for this for so long that you feel like you might come undone right away when he’s barely even touched you.

You let out an involuntary moan when he presses his palm against your clothed sex, but he’s quick to shut you up with a kiss. He continues such ministrations for a bit, unhurriedly rubbing two fingers up and down your core. If he’s going slow so as not to overwhelm you, it doesn't work - you can already feel a familiar knot twisting in your stomach. You can’t even kiss him back anymore, too caught up in the feeling of his hand touching you exactly where you need him, so he settles on kissing your face and your neck.

You swear a little bit of your soul actually leaves your body when he slips his hand underneath your bikini. He trails two fingers up along your slit, watching your face intently in the hopes that your reaction will tell him when he’s found your sensitive spot. You’ve never felt anything other than your own fingers there, and the sensation is breathtaking, especially when he starts rubbing small circles right onto your clit.

“Let me know if it feels good, okay? I’ve never actually done this before,” he admits with a small chuckle. Your eyes shoot open and you grab onto his forearm, making him halt his motions as panic bubbles inside him. “What? Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”

“You’ve never done this before?” you echo his words back at him like there’s no way they might be true.

He smiles shyly and looks away, an odd mix of shame and pride at your reaction. “No, I haven’t.”

“Wow,” you breathe out, disbelieving. “You seem to know exactly what you’re doing, this whole time, I thought you were like, a sex expert or something.”

He laughs again and quickly resumes his previous actions, and any surprise you might have felt at his confession is thrown out the window when his fingers move against your clit again. “I promise you I’m making it up as I go.”

“You’re amazing,” you reply.

You can feel yourself getting wetter by the second, Heeseung’s fingers going at the perfect speed and putting the exact right amount of your pressure against you like he’s done this his whole life. “Am I making you feel good?” he asks, a rhetorical question that he has to know the answer to considering your body’s reaction to him, but you still do him the favor of answering.

“You are. Feels so, so good, Hee,” you sigh as his fingers leave your clit and start to tease at your entrance. Heeseung sighs, too, but more out of exasperation than out of pleasure.

“Let’s get rid of this, hm?” he offers, already pulling your swimming bottoms down your legs and discarding them next to your top. “It’ll be easier like this,” he says, and before you know it, he’s pushed a finger inside you, and you let out the loudest moan you have all night at the feeling.

Heeseung chuckles as he shushes you gently. “Quiet, baby, okay? I know it feels good, but we don’t want to wake anyone up, now, do we?”

You shake your head fervently at his words, but in a twisted way, you care more about your current pleasure than about anyone catching you and Heeseung in the middle of the act. He curls his finger inside you, brushing right against that spot that has you seeing stars, and you let your body grow heavy, trusting him to hold you up when your legs stop working. As if one wasn’t enough, he adds a second finger, thrusting them inside you at an increasing pace that has your thighs shaking sooner than you’d like to admit.

“H-heeseung, oh my God,” you murmur, and that’s somehow enough for Heeseung to understand.

“Gonna cum, doll?”

You barely manage to answer him, your second high of the night approaching faster than you expect it to. Fingers still inside you, Heeseung brings his thumb to rub against your clit again, and five seconds later, you’re cumming all over his hands, body shaking against him and holding onto him throughout it all. You try to be as quiet as possible, and Heeseung presses his lips against yours to stifle any sound, but a few whimpers and broken moans still escape your lips.

When he’s slipped his fingers out of you, you hug him tightly, taking a few seconds to regain your breath as you come down from your high. “You did so well, baby,” Heeseung praises, lips moving against your temple before he presses a kiss there, and his words alone make you whine again.

As soon as your sanity has somehow made its way back into your head, you remember your boyfriend’s pleasure and you press your hand against his bulge once more. He lets out a shaky breath as you start to rub your hand up and down his shaft over his swimming trunks. “You don’t have to,” he says quietly, eyes screwed shut in pleasure.

“I want to,” you reassure, dipping your fingers under the waistband of his trunks so he gets the message. When he takes them off, his fully hard dick slaps against his stomach, and even though you haven’t seen a great amount of dicks in your life, you recognize a big dick when you see one.

It’s always the nerdy, lanky ones.

As you take him in your hand, you look up at him with a sheepish smile. “I’ve never done this, so tell me if it feels good, yeah?”

He takes a deep breath as if trying to steady himself, but his eyes stay closed. “It already feels better than anything you could imagine, baby.”

“But I’m not doing anything,” you say, slightly confused.

“Still.”

You chuckle, and Heeseung almost joins in, but any laughter is ripped from his throat as your hand, formed in a fist loosely gripping him, makes its way down his shaft, then back up. It’s a clumsy motion, and he can tell you’re doing this for the first time, but it drives him crazy anyway. The sole fact that it’s you touching him is enough to turn him into a whimpering mess.

He has to keep himself from moaning loudly and waking up the whole house when your palm brushes against his tip, but thankfully, you notice his reaction right away. As you continue jerking him off, you make sure to pay particular attention to his tip, sweeping your thumb over it every time your hand reaches it. Fascinated, you watch the rise and fall of Heeseung’s chest, the clench of his abs, and the way his beautiful pink lips part, and listen intently to any sound that might come out of them. He’s much less chatty than before, and you can’t help but ask for reassurance from him. “Does it feel good, Hee?”

The worried tone in your voice makes his eyes flicker open. “Of course, baby. Feels amazing,” he answers with a breathless chuckle. You beam at him, and the contrast between your innocent, happy expression and the motions of your hand actually makes him see double until he closes his eyes again.

You press yourself closer to him so you can leave kisses all over his neck, paying particular attention to his Adam’s apple that you know is sensitive. You’re so close that you can feel your own hand against your stomach as you fist it up and down his shaft, slowly picking up speed. You bite down against his neck, not hard enough to leave a mark but definitely hard enough to garner a moan from him, and he can feel his orgasm is mere moments away by now.

“Wanna make you feel as good as you made me feel,” you whisper before pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Love you so much, Hee,” you say, your voice almost a moan, and that’s what drives him over the edge. Knowing that you love him.

He spills his seed all over your hand and stomach with a choked moan and finds your lips to trap them in a feverish kiss. Just like before, the immediate reaction for the both of you is to laugh; coming down from your high and helping the other reach theirs make you feel like you’re on top of the world. You help rinse each other and you spend another five minutes shampooing the other’s hair to get the chlorine out of it, but after that, you’re out of the shower, realizing that your hands and feet have started pruning after what could have been anything between twenty minutes and two hours in the shower.

No matter how many times you tell him you can do it yourself, Heeseung insists on helping you dry off, making sure there’s not a droplet of water on your body before you head back to his room together, just as stealthily as you’d come earlier. You really hoped the sound of the shower was enough to cover any sound you made and that everyone was sleeping too deeply to realize how much time you’d spent in there anyway.

Heeseung quickly puts on clean underwear before getting into bed, then watches you with a lazy smile as you put your panties, shorts and tank top back on. “What are you staring at?” you grumble because even after everything, his intent stare makes you shy.

“You.”

You should have expected it, but it still makes your heart flutter. You can’t even pretend to be annoyed, not bothering to hide your grin as you get into bed with him, snuggling up to him and sighing in contentment at the feeling of his warmth against you. You’d daydreamed one too many times dreaming about what it must feel like falling asleep next to Heeseung, or even better, in his arms, and it was finally happening. You rest your head against his chest, listening to his calming heartbeat while his fingers rake through your hair in a soothing manner.

“I’m spent,” you murmur against his skin. “I think I’m gonna fall asleep in two seconds.”

“Me too,” he chuckles, then presses a kiss to the top of your head. “Sleep, baby. We’ll talk more in the morning.”

“Okay,” you whisper, nuzzling yourself closer against him and letting sleep wash over your tired body.

You wish you could say that you wake up the next morning because of the sunlight pouring on your face or because of Heeseung peppering your face with kisses and awaking you, but really, it’s just your 8 a.m. alarm reminding you you have to go to the market with your mom. The sound jolts you awake, like someone just poured a bucket of cold water over you. You and Heeseung have somehow barely budged from the position you fell asleep in and you want nothing more than to stay there for a couple more hours, but a promise is a promise, so with a sigh, you start to sit up.

When Heeseung feels your body shift away from his, his arm tightens its hold around your waist almost out of its own accord, pulling you back to him. “Just five more minutes,” he pleads, voice slightly whiny and still dripping with sleep that makes butterflies erupt all over your stomach. You give in immediately.

“Just five,” you repeat, and he hums in satisfaction.

But five turns into ten turns into twenty, and when your alarm rings again, it’s already thirty past eight, and you only have fifteen minutes to go home and get ready before your mom will want to leave.

You sigh and, once again, start to pry your limbs away from Heeseung’s, but, once again, he stops you before you can get off the bed, hand coming to grab your wrist gently. You sit up and smile affectionately down at him, brushing away the hair that had fallen in front of his eyes during the night. He blinks his eyes open but can only look at you for a few seconds before he shuts them again, trying to hide his flustered expression under his forearm, but you can still make out his smile and the growing blush on his cheeks.

“What?” you ask quietly in the silence of the room, chuckling at your boyfriend’s cuteness.

“I just remembered last night,” he says, letting his forearm fall away from his face so he can see your reaction.

Your smile grows and you continue to play with his hair as images of last night flood your mind, a sort of fluster enveloping your whole body and making you feel light. You bend over to press soft kisses to his forehead, to his cheek, and then to his lips before burying your face in the crook of his neck. His hand comes up naturally to your back, slipping under the thin fabric to graze his fingernails across your exposed skin.

“Last night was amazing, Hee. Thank you so much,” you whisper, trying not to get carried away by the feeling of his caresses.

“The pleasure’s all mine,” he replies, kissing the top of your head and burying his nose there to inhale the scent of your hair.

You count down from ten, and on zero, you sigh, pushing yourself from Heeseung for good this time. “Okay, I really have to go now.” He sits up with you, fixing you with a pout, but you won’t let him use his cuteness against you and trick you into staying. “I’ll text you when I’m done, okay?”

“Okay. I’ll walk you downstairs.” When he sees you about to protest, he puts on his best smile, akin to one that an athlete would wear after winning first place. “I wanna kiss you goodbye.”

You roll your eyes but your smile makes it obvious how delighted you are that he wants to be with you ‘til the very last second. You gather your stuff and head into the hallway. You know his parents are already at work, and even though Chaeyeong and Seeun usually sleep in until much later than now, you still want to make sure they’re asleep. You gesture at Heeseung to be quiet as you peer inside Seeun’s room quickly and quietly - if they wake up, you can just say you forgot something yesterday and came back to get it quickly, and if they don’t, you’re pretty safe to escape without getting caught.

When they don’t budge an inch, you close her door again and head down the stairs to the entrance where your shoes lay. You check your phone and realize with dread that your mom’s not going to be very happy with you, but you don’t have it in you to push Heeseung away when he insists on helping you into your shoes (they’re slip-ons) and when he wraps his arm around your middle, bringing you in for another kiss. You let yourself melt under his touch - it’s not like thirty seconds will make much of a difference now that you’re already late anyway.

“You do know that if we’re caught kissing here, we’re dead?” you breathe, pulling away slightly from Heeseung to speak. You’re still so close that you feel his lips move against yours as they curl up into a smirk.

“I know, but I wanna risk it.” And just like that, his lips are back on yours, and all other thoughts are blown away like feathers in the wind.

It’s almost dangerous how you can’t think of anything else when you’re this close to Heeseung. How his scent, his warmth, the feel of his skin and his hair under your hands fill your mind up to the brim. It’s dangerous because it’s precisely in moments like these that you should think before you act, before you let yourself be consumed by him. And it’s moments like these that you look back on later and curse yourself for being so foolish.

“Heeseung? Y/N?”

Alarm fills your body as soon as you hear Seeun’s shaky voice calling out your names. She looks down at you from the stairwell, shock evident on her face and her eyes immediately welling up with tears. Your hands let go of Heeseung’s t-shirt and your arms fall limp at your sides, but other than that, you’re frozen in place. You watch as Seeun’s eyes dart between you and Heeseung and as she realizes that you’ve been hiding something big from her; that you even lied straight to her face.

It’s only when a sob escapes her lips and she whips around, heading back upstairs to her room, that you snap out of it. You immediately go to follow her, but Heeseung calls out your name as his hand reaches out to grab your wrist. You look down at where your bodies touch, and your gazes lock just as the sound Seeun’s door slamming shut reverberates through the house.

“I have to talk to her,” you whisper as you wrench your wrist away from Heeseung’s hold.

You walk away and leave him behind.

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