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luminiamore · 1 day

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cult leader geto x black jujustu sorcerer reader

a/n: based on that lil snippet ^ decided to make an actual post ⊂(￣▽￣)⊃

warnings: heavy exhibitionism, cockwarming, he’s such a gentle man, mentions of suicide, joker and harley type beat without the domestic violence, hints of yandere, ya’ll worship each other and therefore people worship you, married asf with kids, creampie

2.1k words.

masterlist

Suguru’s interest in you has been unusually intense since he was a student at Jujustu Tech. Without a doubt, you were beautiful. But unlike those around him, you were also quiet, calm, and collected. His approach to you was pure curiosity, without any malice. He was curious about you, your thoughts, and your mannerisms.

However, you rarely paid him any mind, thinking he was just trying to increase the number of girls he sleeps with. So, he made it possible for him to coincidentally be everywhere you were; you surely couldn’t ignore him that way.

You were getting some mochi downtown? That’s crazy. He was just picking up some for his best friend at the same spot. He did tell you he really likes sweets. You were shopping for a new pair of shoes at the mall? Realizing his pair is worn out, he’s checking out the section opposite yours. He was there to end your fight when you got tossed around by some special grade, so you couldn’t even go on a mission by yourself. He was impossible to ignore.

He couldn’t understand exactly what it was, but he wanted to be around you more than he cared to admit. Despite you being a first-grade sorcerer, he would use the excuse of “protecting” you. His group, Shoko, Utahime, or even the proclaimed strongest, Gojo Satoru, weren’t close to you. Until he defected, he deliberately kept you away from them. They only knew you as the girl he loves— his words.

You eventually fell for Suguru, and you fell hard. He didn’t catch you, but he fell with you, for you. Suguru made it a point to call you whenever possible, even though you were not part of the Riko mission. Upon his return, you felt devastated as he was distressed by the possibility of losing his best friend. Distressed at the possibility of not seeing you again. That frightened him the most. You witnessed him losing himself, having sleepless nights, and even attempting to end his life. You were always there for him, fixing him tea and listening to his ideas.

Being with Suguru was something you became open to, and with the way you were always around him, everyone thought you were. He never put a title on.. whatever the nature of your relationship was. But you never really saw him with any other girl except for you, and he would take care of any sorcerer who tried to get close to you. At some point, you recall asking him why he does it, and the only response he gave you was,

“You have me.”

You didn’t bother to ask what that meant, thinking that he would give you another cryptic answer or simply send you a sleazy smile. But in more ways than one, you realized that you did have Suguru. He was a person who provided. He never missed an opportunity to care for you, buy you your favorite things unexpectedly, take you out for dinner, and even carry you like a princess just because.

You never inquired about the reason; you just offered him a kiss on the cheek as a gesture of thanks. Suguru liked it when you did that. Your soft, glossy lips always had a nice feel on his skin. The basis of your relationship changed when he asked you to kiss him on the lips as a thank you instead.

“R-Really?”

His ears are pierced by your soft voice. Your beautiful eyes were always on him as he sat on the flatbed in your dorm. You had the box in your hands of the necklace that you had been admiring while you and Suguru were passing by a jewelry store. The price tag was a whopping $6,000, so it wasn’t cheap. That’s why you walked away after staring for about ten seconds. He didn’t, though. The next morning, he made a single phone call, and the necklace you were eyeing made its way to your doorstep that same day.

“Really.” He grasps your gentle hands with both of his hands, dropping the box carelessly on your bed.

“I never want to force you to do anything.” You had a genuine belief that you would follow Suguru to the end of the earth. You were steadfast in your devotion to him, even before he became a cult leader. You have reason to believe that you were his first devotee. Your love for him was undeniable, which is why you didn’t hesitate to bring his lips to yours for a gentle peck.

Suguru didn’t anticipate the sweetness of your lips on that day, nor did he anticipate how he would crave the sensation of them every second. He was unaware of how addictive you could be because, honestly, you two didn’t stop at just a peck. One turned into two, two turned into five, and five turned into an impromptu make-out session on your mattress.

It was the first night that he showed you pleasure beneath the layers of your clothes. The first night, he showed you exactly what you do to him. The long-haired man showed you ecstasy that was unmatched by any other. Before anything else, he prepared you by slobbering all over your pink clit and fingering you so hard, so deep, that you squirted at least three times on his awaiting face.

And when he finally forced his dick inside your wet hole... It was like a paradise on earth, you swear. You could feel every vein of his cock brushing against the deepest parts of your core. He reaches so deep, his cock basically drilling into your bruised cervix. His drooling lips sucking at your perfectly manicured french tipped toes. Every time he fucked you, which was almost every day, it was like this. They all carried out the same action, whether it was a slow thrust or a quick, desperate one.

He’s grown addicted to the feel of your cunt, to the faces you make when he’s fucking you. Suguru has tainted you and transformed you into a being who would do anything for him. He never forgot to express that you did the same for him. The day he killed his parents, he came to you with two little girls, scared shitless and clinging onto his kāṣāya garment over the black yukata robes. And when you asked him what happened, he only told you,

“There are our children now. Don’t worry, we will have one of our own soon. I promise, my love.”

You knew about Suguru’s plans to eradicate almost 95% of the world’s population, but you didn’t think he would actually go through with it. You should have left and probably ran away from this man when he showed you what he did. But you couldn’t, too devoted and blinded by love. So, you followed him and watched him create an operation where people worshipped his entire being. That’s what should have been the case.

Suguru was never without you. He made his followers kiss the ground you walked on, just as they worshiped him. You were given respect, love, and even admiration. For almost ten years, your life consisted of being taken care of by your lover, being devoted to humans, and taking care of your four children. Suguru did end up giving you the children he promised you. He was content with his life as it was, and honestly, he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. His happiness was made possible by you.

Take today as an example, it marks the anniversary of Suguru putting a shiny blood diamond on your finger. The temple’s blue curtains are being blown by the wind while the birds chirp. Your bare body rested on Suguru’s lap, facing forward. His cock impaled you while you were sitting on him, creating a stream of pussy juice that dripped onto the floor. Your soft thighs were spread wide over his legs, restricting you from any movement. Such an intimate position should undoubtedly be shared only by the two, but it wasn’t.

Far from it, in fact. There were 20– maybe 50 people kneeling with gifts in their hands, in front of your lover, in front of you. You were too consumed to pay attention to them, too full to do anything but whine out beautiful cries that echoed around the whole compound. It was impossible for anyone to not know what was happening.

For some time now, he’s been laying his cock inside of you and refusing to move. Suguru’s view was of your sparkling back, soft, and with a tattoo of his name if he shifted his gaze slightly lower. He didn’t have to see you to know how beautiful you look right now, and of course, he didn’t have an issue telling you.

“Such a gorgeous girl. Gets you wet knowing these people would die to fuck you, doesn’t it?” He squeezes your fat tits, pinching one of your nipples, causing you to let out a squeal. He continues on with a raspy voice,

“But they can’t, can they? And they never will. Why is that, sweetheart?”

You whine, grasping at his thighs because you just want him to move. The pressure of his fat cock inside you makes you desperate for the intense fucking that only he can give you. But your man doesn’t want that as an answer, he wants to hear your angelic voice, so he slaps your clit as punishment.

“B-Because m’yours!” It seems you said the right answer, or maybe Suguru was finally getting as desperate as you are because he slowly starts moving his dick in and out of your tight cunt. He takes his time moving his hand so that the next visitor can come forward and present their gifts. Just to keep up with his image. He doesn’t bother looking at them, believing that anything that’s not from you is a waste. Utter trash.

He kisses the side of your cheek and whispers in your ear, tone desperate and pleading, “All mine. Tell me you love me, and only me. Please, I need to hear it.”

He paces himself slowly inside of you to avoid ruining you in front of these ’ monkeys.’ You lean your head back against his neck, your nails tugging at the hair you love so much. His throat tightens with a groan when at the action, fuck. You really don’t know what you do to him.

Despite being pushed a little past your limit, you manage to steady your voice so Suguru can hear your following words clearly, “Love you, baby. I’ll only ever love you.”

Regardless of how many times you tell him this, it always manages to make Suguru’s heart race. He can’t believe you’re all his. Such a goddess that you are. Fuck, he could cum right here, right now, inside your dripping cunt. Since he flushed out your birth control after your first pregnancy, you wouldn’t need much to get pregnant. His brain is racing with the prospect of your tits swelling with milk and your belly rounding to carry his offspring.

He groans when the image runs through his mind, and now Suguru has a new mission. “What about another baby, hm? I’ll take care of you, just like I did the last two times. Won’t have you lift a finger, sweetheart. Please.”

His pace speeds up a bit, and the thought of seeing you like that is causing his mind to reel. Your tight pussy squeezing around him was as if you were attempting to milk his cock for all it’s worth. On the other hand, you were anticipating your lover would say something like this. You were nodding your head in his shoulder before he finished his sentence.

“P-Please! Whatever- Anything you w-want.” You tremble, completely ignoring the people still kneeling in front of you. Close enough to see, but just far enough so your juices won’t reach them. They are not worthy of any inch— any spec of your sweet wetness. You hear Suguru’s whimper as his finger sneakily reaches your swollen clit, gently rubbing tight circles around it.

“That’s what I love to hear, baby. I love you so fucking much, so fucking much. I love you, I love you-” You moan out, your pussy squeezing infinitely tighter around him as you squirt all over the empty space between you and your devotees. The feeling causes Suguru to release a deep moan as his balls churn and his thick cum pushes past your womb. Fuck, it’s so much. There’s no doubt that it reached your uterus.

Your lover isn’t convinced, though, so he immediately stands holding you in a bridal position. He walks past the crowd, leaving them there while his cock and cum are still out and dripping from your sore pussy.

“Think I need to pump you full again. Make sure you really get pregnant, yeah?” The only thing you can do is nod and mentally prepare yourself for the night ahead of you.

#geto suguru #jjk x black reader #lumiwrites #jjk smut #geto x black reader #suguru geto smut #geto suguru smut #getou suguru x reader #geto suguru x black reader smut #jujutsu geto #geto smut #geto x reader #geto x y/n #jjk geto #jjk fanfic #fanfic #geto x you

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peachhcs · 1 day

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how it all began -> podcast episode

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

a small podcast snippet where samy and will talk about how they got together

1.9k words

here are the small draft blurbs i wrote way back when i started this series that i told y’all i would share. i have a lot of them, so i’ll post them periodically :) this is from where i imagined will and samy talking about each other on podcast episodes they've invited to

au masterlist

"alright, so give me all the juicy details. how did this next step in your relationship come to be?" samy laughed mostly to herself as she fidgeted with the ends of her shirt.

"i mean..i feel like will and i are like..the exact of every best friends to lover trope right now..like i feel like we fit all the stereotypes," the brunette began making the interviewer laugh.

"i don't know..i mean something in our brains just flipped. we only ever saw each other as like..siblings. like we had a brother and sister relationship with one another, but the more i think about it, the more i think it might've just been us suppressing those feelings and playing it off as a family dynamic instead," the girl giggled.

"were your close friends and family ever like..why the hell aren't they together?"

"looking back on it, there was one night when i was like..sixteen maybe? will had just moved to michigan for his development program and he hung out at our house with some of his friends and like..we all had a great time. we just talked and caught up and i got to know his teammates, but after, when they left, my mom..she had this look on her face. i didn't know what look it was at the time and so i was like why are you looking at me like that? she didn't say anything, but she just smiled and shook her head and now, i'm pretty sure it was her seeing the connection will and i had that we didn't even know we had yet," samy explained.

"i feel like there's such a beautiful thing about that though. it's like you guys weren't even trying to be in a relationship, but everyone around you two knew how special of a connection you two have and they were just like..oh yeah they're definitely gonna be together one day," the interviewer nodded.

"i know. i know. it is beautiful because we weren't even really looking for a relationship and..one thing led to another. i always see those posts that say relationships come from the most unexpected person in the most unexpected time," samy smiled.

"i mean you can tell us whatever you want, you don't have to say anything, but if you want, can you talk about like how it happened and what changed?"

"it was this past summer..will was finishing up his dev program and he was like in a different place every weekend so we hardly got to see one another, but he still texted me and called me whenever he could to talk about his game like we always did, so that wasn't unusual..but like i don't know..there was this thought in the back of my head like..i don't even know how to explain it, but it was like i got this feeling in my chest every time will texted or called me and i started realizing that he didn't do this with everyone. really only like me and his sisters. anyways, the draft rolled around and obviously i was gonna be there. my family sat with his family and we were all dressed to the nines. will was locked in, nervous about his pick, all of that. it wasn't until after where we just found ourselves just with each other in the arena and like..we looked at each other and i think that's just when we knew something was changing between us."

"you both felt that change right in that moment?"

"i mean yeah. he looked at me like..a little too long and i was like..oh shit, this is..this is a way different feeling than i'm used to. it wasn't until his draft party in boston when everything sort of..like came out. i can't give too many details, but we ended up talking that night and like..the rest just went from there," the girl laughed a little.

"and i mean, you two have the same collegiate number absolutely coincidentally."

"yeah, i think that was our final tipping point when we found out we got the same number. it was like the universe telling us, okay yeah, you guys definitely belong together," the brunette grinned.

"so is it hard being long distance and like finding out all of this stuff right as you leave for college?"

"yeah, a bit. it was kind of like a punch in the face. we get something good, but it doesn't last for long because will's now states away in boston and i'm still in michigan, but we're making it work. we call everyday and we text everyday. it's also easy because we know how one another works, so we like skipped all the awkward parts of getting to know one another and figuring out each other's quirks because we already know it."

"i think that definitely makes things easier like you said. you don't have to spend time in the awkward stage because you guys already had that growing up."

"yeah, exactly, but yeah, it's been fun opening this side of one another and delving into it more. he's always been there for me and i mean it's like we danced around one another until the time was finally right for our lives to mix together in that way."

—

"so i don't know if you've seen the clips of sam talking about your relationship or not?" will smiled a bit, nodding to say he has seen it.

"i have and i mean everything she said was pretty spot on and i probably couldn't have said it better myself," the blonde chuckled.

"i don't wanna exhaust the subject too much, but i'd love to sort of hear your take on about the change and sort of realization about your relationship with her."

"yeah, just this past summer was when things just changed for us. she was at the draft in nashville with all of us and just like..it was really special having all of my close friends and family there watching me take on another big milestone in my life. samy's always been there for me, so having her there was really great. i think she said after i got picked we ended up in the arena with just us and we were talking briefly and like..yeah it just changed for us in that moment. i realized how lucky i was to have her there and that she took time out of her busy schedule to be there and support me and i was just thinking how no one else would do that for me but her," will said, his smile still painting his features.

"did you like ever have any past feelings for her in that way that you pushed away thinking it'd never be like that?"

"i think maybe when we were like..12 or something. it was like..peak puberty years so i had this thought in the back of my mind like..what if samy and i ended up as something more, but she never seemed into that ever. we were like siblings, so i kind of just let the idea go knowing we wouldn't ever be like that until it started just resurfacing this past year with her."

"i think i asked sam this, but were your close friends or family ever like..why the hell aren't they together?"

"well definitely my teammates knew way before i did. the first time they met her and hung around us and we went back to our places they looked at me and they were like: are you sure you've never thought about her in that way before? so they even knew before i had an idea. my mom at times was definitely suspicious and surprised that we never got together because i think she was secretly rooting we would at some point," the hockey player laughed.

"moms and friends always know. always trust what they say," the interviewer also laughed.

"i know, i should've listened to them more. even at sixteen where samy and i still saw each other as siblings they were skeptical. especially ryan. he was giving us eyes and anytime we hung out with her he was giving me these looks like you're for real right now? you have zero feelings for her? and i mean i thought our interactions were normal and i guess i brushed off a lot of them that looked flirty or came off that way and samy did too so that's probably why it took us so long to catch on."

"even though you guys are long distance right now, how are you two working through that while taking on this new territory of your relationship?"

"well, it's definitely easier because we know one another so well. it helps that we didn't have an awkward stage because we kind of already went through that when we were kids. plus, samy just makes it easy. we're very alike so we know why we are the way we are. she's always been there for me and i've always been there for her. we're constantly supporting one another and we call everyday just like talking about our days or games if we have them. if we can't call, we send like 10 voice messages explains our days. it's just easy because we know each other so well, so nothing has to be misread or miscommunicated because we already know. it definitely sucks we're not together like we were for two years, but it just makes seeing one another that more special when it comes around."

"that's really special. your relationship has always been really special to the fans who've been following you two for while now, so i know they love seeing you guys finally together. i'm sure they knew way before you guys did too," will and the interviewer shared a laugh.

"i'm sure they did. samy and i aren't the best at picking up clues like that," will chuckled.

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user1 OH MY GOD I CANT??? THEYRE BOTH SO ADORABLE AWWW

user2 IGE BEEN WAITING FIR THIS ONE!!!! i knew i knew i knew they'd finally end up together

user3 the best friends to lovers pipeline is so incredibly real

user4 WILL'S FRIENDS KNOWING BEFORE HE DID!!! god they must've been so painfully obvious back then to everyone but themselves

user5 golden retriever and golden retriever fr

user6 stop i love these two sm they truly did grow up together and seeing them try out a relationship is so cute i hope they work out!!!

user7 MY roman empire

user8 oh they're in love love

user9 them calling everyday is so cute oh my god

user10 THEM HAVING THE SAME NUMBERS UNPLANNED IS LITERALLY FATE AND DESTINY

user11 samy hughes and will smith make so much sense in my head

user12 THE WAY HE CALLS HER SAMY IS SO CUTE

user13 we need them in an interview together next!!!

user14 samy saying how will looked at her for a little too long and she just knew is so fucking real on god like i get you girl so bad if will looked at me the way he looks at her i'd fold immediately

user15 i love that they're so willing to share this with us bc we basically grew up with them too

user16 i'm actually obsessed with them

user17 THEYVE BEEN SOFT LAUNCHING EACH OTHER THUS ENTIRE TIME??!

user18 im definitely betting it was some sort of like drunk confession at will's draft party because samy said she couldn't get into the details meaning she couldn't tell the interviewer they were underage drinking GOD i love them sm

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lxvvie · 2 days

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howdy, tis i the hiker simon enthusiast. as per my last ask about olderbf!simon (of which me personally see as an age gap thing and him in his later years ) he's been cheeky, trying to escape his chores in exchange for some cute photos of him. i think with age, he is the typeof guy that mellows out esp in retirement. imagine you're having the time of your life trekking uphill and you feel your pack getting unusually heavy only to find simon was stealthily (these damn military men!) filling it with stones. also a tactic for him to heave you over edges and carrying you across creeks like you're literally a paperweight (he loves putting on a show and how you try to hide your swooning). you grope his ass in retaliation while your puppy joins to jump him, muddy paws and all. can u tell that he is my precious guy

This is so damn cute.

Simon shirking his chores because he'd much rather spend time with you doing nothing but relaxing.

He also makes you walk in front of him. Simon says it's to keep an eye out and have your back on the trail but it's really to watch the sway of your hips and your ass in those jeans.

And whenever Pup and his muddy paws excitedly jump on Simon, he just rolls his eyes and goes, "Thanks, Pup," while giving him scritches.

Yeah, he could get used to the retired life.

#older bf!simon #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty modern lovefare.#simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x you #call of duty x reader #call of duty x you #cod x reader #cod x you #x black reader #x poc reader #x plus size reader #task force 141

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tmae3114 · 1 day

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So there's this theory I've had bouncing around in my head for *checks notes* about three years now and, well, it does not have nearly the level of evidence I tend to prefer before I make a theory post - it is, in fact, Predominantly Vibes Based - but it has, again, been bouncing around in my head for three years and I refuse to be alone with it any longer

(...also, if I'm right, I wanna be able to go "I KNEW IT" and have a timestamp to point to XD)

OKAY. So. Basically.

I think Alinua might be a twice-born.

Hear me out:

Firstly:

We know that Cloud Elves live pretty much exclusively on the Archipelago Nimbus and are isolationist (Extra Lore: The Three Elder Races - "The Islands have minimal contact or trade with the outside world, [...]" & "These Cloud Elves are unique in many ways, most notably their isolationism [...]" and Page 1.6.12 "I suppose a cloud elf outside of the Archipelago Nimbus is fairly unusual-") but Alinua has been down on the surface since before she can remember

That suggests unusual circumstances. Isolationist people who have minimal contact with the outside world don't just lose a baby in said outside world

Alinua's theory for this is that her birth parents "probably reasonably assumed [she] had the Chimeric Plague and dropped [her] over the edge" (Page 1.6.13) but, crucially, there is no actual evidence of this. It's what she assumes probably happened but she has no memory of the actual events (Page 1.6.23 "I don't even remember it. I've never met my birth parents […]")

Therefore, it is entirely possible that Alinua is wrong about how she ended up not on the Archipelago Nimbus. And I, personally, think it's pretty likely that she's wrong because we know that the Archipelago Nimbus can sometimes be even higher up than the peak of the Throne of the World (this post) and even with it usually being lower down than that, I find it... somewhat doubtful that an infant (toddler, at best) would survive that fall. Not impossible in a fantasy setting but... doubtful.

Secondly:

We know that the Chimeric Plague was Life attempting to connect with a vessel who could be her eyes and give her perspective (Pages 1.20.20 - 1.20.23)

Even before Life finally broke through, Alinua was incredibly unusual for a carrier of the Chimeric Plague. She didn't even find out she was one until she was about ten (Page 1.6.13 "I had a normal life and family for ten years- and then I learned I was a chimera bomb [...]") when most die before they turn five (Page 1.2.10 "I shouldn't have made it past five years old" and Extra Lore: The Chimeric Plague "[...] it is inevitable in every case that the child will lose total control of their magic within the first few years of their life [...]"). She was twice the expected age of a carrier when she found out.

We don't know why Alinua is the successful attempt that finally worked. Not only do we not know, Alinua herself brings it up while talking to Life (Page 1.20.23 "I… don't know if there's anything special about me that kept you from overwhelming me like the others, or if I'm just the lucky one you finally got right."). The question is open: is there something special/unique about Alinua that allowed her to survive where none of the other children did? And if so, what is it?

Thirdly:

So. Carrion crawlers.

We have not actually met any in the story itself yet, only heard Caliban bring them up in the context of an insult (Page 1.12.10 "Twice-born son of a carrion crawler! You had a plan this whole time?!") but fortunately! the Aurora tumblr exists! so we have additional information!

Carrion crawlers eat dead things and sometimes give birth to baby clones of one of their recent meals, which are called twice-born. A twice-born is a healthy infant, identical in every way to how the original would've been as an infant, and age normally for the species they were produced from. Additionally, they have no memories from their source material (so to speak) and develop their own, unique soul, though if they came from a mage, their soul will develop the same channels (this post and this post)

...now, I mentioned at the start that this theory does not have as much evidence as I would like and is mostly Vibes Based, and we have now hit the point where I run out of evidence and switch to vibes. I do not have any evidence which actually points to a connection between any of this.

However, I do still Have Thoughts

We know that Alinua was adopted had a happy (or, at least, "normal") childhood prior to figuring out she was a chimeric carrier (1.6.13, see above) and seemingly doesn't think about her birth family very often. It's entirely possible that she didn't ask questions about where she came from as a child. It's not been brought up yet how her adoptive family found her but, given that she assumes she was thrown off the edge of the Archipelago Nimbus, the possibility that they found a seemingly-abandoned baby just lying around doesn't seem too out there. And if Alinua is a twice-born, yet clearly doesn't know that herself, her family may also not have known that... or may have known and opted to keep it hidden, even from her, given that twice-born are generally considered "deeply unnerving and grotesque" (this post).

As for how Alinua came to be in this theorised scenario, there's two possibilities I've considered.

The first is that an adult life mage cloud elf was outside the Archipelago Nimbus for Some Reason, died somewhere where there are carrion crawlers, and things went from there.

The second, much sadder, possibility is that the "Chimeric Plague carrier baby thrown off the edge of the flying islands" possibility did happen... the baby in question just wasn't Alinua because the fall was, in fact, not a survivable one. And then, just as a twice-born will inherit being-a-mage, Alinua inherited having the Chimeric Plague.

And, in either of these cases, something about being twice-born subsequently protected Alinua from being overwhelmed by Life.

#aurora #webcomic aurora #aurora webcomic #comic aurora #HOW have I been reading this comic for four years and still don't know the main tag #first theory post for this comic! woo!#next time I have a theory I will hopefully have Actual Evidence for my point and not just disparate lore I am conspiracy boarding with XP #tmae overanalyses #(haven't used THAT tag for a while. I need to write up more proper theory posts again it's been mostly off-the-cuff meta lately)#tmae overanalyses aurora #NEW TAG!#anyways if we ever get any evidence that points towards this theory being onto something. I WILL lose my mind #now if you will excuse me. it is past midnight and I have a bed calling me

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vickyvicarious · 1 day

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There was a certain method in the Count's inquiries, so I shall try to put them down in sequence; the knowledge may somehow or some time be useful to me.

Let's talk about this method.

Dracula opens this conversation by first checking if he could have multiple solicitors, then questioning further whether he could have them for different tasks/locations. Jonathan accedes the legality of all this, but first says it's not usually necessary, then wants more detail when Dracula keeps asking. Dracula explains, but his explanation seems a little contradictory:

"Now here let me say frankly, lest you should think it strange that I have sought the services of one so far off from London instead of some one resident there, that my motive was that no local interest might be served save my wish only; and as one of London residence might, perhaps, have some purpose of himself or friend to serve, I went thus afield to seek my agent, whose labours should be only to my interest. Now, suppose I, who have much of affairs, wish to ship goods, say, to Newcastle, or Durham, or Harwich, or Dover, might it not be that it could with more ease be done by consigning to one in these ports?"

He claims he didn't want any local interests to be served over his own in London, but then turns right around and says that local lawyers in various ports would be able to help him there more easily. If he really wants his own interests served first and foremost, Jonathan's suggestion that he could work with one solicitor, who would then work on his behalf with colleagues in other places, seems perfectly reasonable. Of course, if he wants to limit how much of his affairs any one person knows, then dividing his various tasks amongst various people makes sense. It's more unusual or even suspicious, but it's perfectly legal.

(Aside here - part of the reason I think he actually wanted a lawyer who wasn't from London is because he wants as little connection drawn between himself and that lawyer's (or lawyers' plural, going off my theory he might plan to kill Mr. Hawkins later) strange disappearance/death. He wants anyone he meets in London to know nothing about him before his arrival there.)

Dracula's happy to hear this. Then he starts delving into all sorts of specifics, with an attention to detail that impresses Jonathan. He obviously wants to be very careful to be as fully prepared as possible. Only after this is all confirmed (in books, not just by Jonathan's word - perhaps guarding against Jonathan, who knows he is imprisoned, lying to him?), does he ask whether Jonathan has written home. He uses clever wording and an implicit threat to coerce Jonathan to agree to remaining another month and helping him further.

This, just after they have completed all their business. It's extra cruel with that timing. And then as soon as he sees Jonathan is trapped, he presses his advantage with insidious charm, essentially dictating the content of the letters he wants him to write home. He gives Jonathan extremely thin paper, once again a threat without words that his words will be seen, his cooperation assessed further. He proceeds to sit right there the entire time Jonathan is writing, and only after he is done does Dracula begin to write his own letters. This little choice increases the pressure immensely, meaning Jonathan has to write while feeling watched the entire time, then wait in suspense even longer after he has finished. Sure, he says he's just reading a book, but I doubt he's putting all his attention on that. Dracula is essentially taunting him here - all the more so when he leaves the room and the letters unguarded briefly.

Throughout the entire conversation, and the letter-writing that follows, he slowly tightens a net around Jonathan. The first part might raise suspicions about what Dracula plans to get up to, but it also is completely focused on business and very productive. It's also a lot of Jonathan saying yes, you can do that. Yes, it's odd to have multiple solicitors, but you can do that. Yes, if you want, that's allowed, and here's how to avoid any negative consequences. Then he uses the claim of business and duty to impose further on Jonathan. Jonathan is forced again to say yes, you can do that. You can have me stay longer. Yes, I accept, Mr. Hawkins did say I would help you however you needed. I will do that. Then as soon as Jonathan has agreed to that, Dracula ramps up the charm and threat both, and pushes harder with the letter request. He forces Jonathan to once again agree, this time without any words. Yes, I'll do that. I'll do what you want me to.

And then, at the very end, after establishing this pattern of agreement and complicity, after making Jonathan feel completely trapped in so many ways. Then, he starts to test Jonathan. To push him more. He leaves the room, leaves his letters behind. Two of them unopened. What is that if not an invitation to snoop? Jonathan takes the invitation - but he's frustrated in any effort to read inside by Dracula's swift return. Dracula removes any opportunity to learn more about the letters, and moves to leave Jonathan alone to stew in his thoughts... but turns back at the door to deliver a warning.

Don't sleep outside your room. If you do, who knows what would happen to you. He gestures as though he's washing his hands, as if saying I'm not responsible for the result or maybe even I won't save you. Coming right now, after the way the rest of this conversation has gone... it feels a lot like a deliberate taunt. A test. A push, to see if Jonathan will rebel once out of his sight. A trap, perhaps - especially if leaving him with the letters was already a trick, especially if he could tell that Jonathan tried to spy on them.

#dracula daily #count dracula #jonathan harker #and what will happen if jonathan chooses to spring it?#...what will happen if he *doesn't*?

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shatcey · 18 hours

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Names in IkeVil

All combinations of first and last names I find extremely good. They sound catching and are easy to remember. It has always been a challenge for me to remember the names of new characters, but here… I had only one problem. I've always confused William with Victor. To me, all names that start with the same letter (in this case, they sound like they start with the same letter) are very similar. And here not only one letter, but also the first syllable sound the same. You know… that was tough. It's only then I start calling them by pet names (Willy and Vic) I finally start hearing them differently.

There is a pseudoscience that claims that all words or names can be described in a few words that convey the emotions you experience when you hear them. It called phonosemantics. I cannot say that this is real science, because there is no (and cannot be) proof… everything is incredibly personal. But it exists, and I find the concept very fascinating.

But first let's talk about how I hear their names. Random order. Don't look for deep meaning.

Liam Evans. It sounds very soft and sweet to me, like marshmallows. It's very streamlined and even shapeless, but it's still extremely pleasant to hear and easy to remember. It's a good name for an actor.

Jude Jazza. Juicy. That's the first thought. It sways pleasantly in the mouth, I wanna repeat it again and again. To me, it sounds like a sour candy with a sweet core that constantly hits the teeth with an unpleasant, but for some reason attractive sound.

William Rex. A very loud and strong name. It sounds like the name of a political leader or something. But in the end it softened slightly, so the impression changed a bit. Now it feels like a warm blanket. I can't see him as food. A shame…

Harrison Gray. Another strong name. But it sounds softer, more stable… there are no sharp corners in it. It is strong, but soft. I don't know why, but it feels like something with carrot in it. Not juice, maybe cake… I'm sorry, Harry… You're not strawberry milk.

Roger Barel. I don't know why this name feels like a balm that smooths all problems. It's warm and cozy. It's like sitting by the fireplace with a cup of cocoa. Funny… I don't like this guy, but his name makes the most calming impression on me.

Alfons Sylvatica. Very unusual. I see it as something with a lot of spices, like an Indian food, but the taste is constantly changing. I love it. I like the softness of his name, how unique and very odd it sounds… This name is not easy to pronounce, but there is something alluring about it. I really like it.

Elbert Greetia. His name gave the impression of something big but soft. It sounds strong at first, but in the end it sounds like something small and even shy one… For some reason, he reminds me of cotton candy.

Ellis Twilight. Very soft, very smooth, but somehow cold… For some reason, I see a picture of being outside in the middle of the night (perhaps due of the meaning) in a field of flowers or on the riverbank… perhaps both. It's a summer night, soft and calm, with lots of stars in the sky. It's a little cold, but not enough to feel chills. Compare with food… maybe ice cream. It's incredibly delicious, but if you're not careful all the time, you may catch a cold.

Victor. It feels small (funny, considering the character), but soft, with a lot of cream.

And this is how phonosemantic analysis describes these names*:

Liam Evans. Good, safe, beautiful, rounded, smooth, bright, kind, joyful, simple.

Jude Jazza. Manly, brave, rude, big, strong, mighty, loud.

William Rex. Safe, nice, rounded, beautiful, big, majestic.

Harrison Gray. Manly

Roger Barel. Brave, mighty, courageous, strong, rude, big, loud, majestic, bright.

Alfons Sylvatica. Quiet, weak, frail, dim.

Elbert Greetia. Big, simple, good, beautiful.

Ellis Twillight. Nice, beautiful, safe, big, majestic, rounded.

Victor. There are no pronounced characteristics.

* I haven't found an easy way to get these characteristics in English. There are many articles, but I'm too lazy to read to figure out how to do it myself (and I don't really have time for this). I need a form where I can enter a name and click a button to get the result. But I didn't find anything like this in English. So I used transliteration into my native language, entered it into forms, found the result, translated it back into English (yes, I had time for that!!!). And suddenly I discovered that I probably don't pronounce all the names correctly. The biggest issue was with Greetia. I always pronounce it the way I see it [Gritia], but the translator says it should be [Grisha]. And depending on how it's pronounced, I get different results. Not much different, but still… So I choose the words the way I found it more correct.

I was a little offended because of Alfons, but you cannot change the facts, aren't you? And Victor, as always, is mysterious…

Take a look for yourself. I think there's a lot in common with the characters. So maybe devs are using this "science" when choosing their names. Or it's just a coincidence… Or this thing really works…

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cripplecharacters · 2 days

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Hi Sasza i read through what you wrote about facial differences and realized that some things i planned to include might not be ideal and i would like to ask advice on what to change and how or if it would be better if i don't do it at all.

There are three characters who i would like to ask about. Only one of them has a facial differenc from the start of the story and its still an aquired injurie in his case. In my opinion he is the most simple case so i will start with him.

He is a minor character named Balthazar who shows up a few times throughout the story. He is a very energetic and friendly person who likes to play harmless tricks on people around him and has a good sense for fashion and is considered somewhat a trend setter in the courts he frequently moves in, he has several burn scars on his face. He has difficulty with moving parts of his face especialy the left side of his mouth has inpaired vision in one of his eyes and is missing part of his nose because of them. He is conected to the main character's father (who could be considered a moraly grey character strictly speaking due to some of his actions but he is a positive character over all and the fact that Balthazar choses to involve himself with him is considered a good sign by others around them that he (mc's dad, not Balthazar) is more good than bad.)

The thing that might be problem is that his scars are linked to an important event in his backstory. He was part of the branch of militya who deals with mostly magical, sometimes norma fires. He was a high ranking official and he helped the mc's dad escape when his parents tried to force him to join to get rid of him. A few years later he suffered the injurie and was unabel to continue on with his carrer. The mc's dad bought him enough land to be considered a nobel and ensured he had everything he needed to be confortabel in his new life out of gratitude for his help. The fire in whic he was injured is not significant to the story, and being injured while fullfiling his job is not unusual. But his injurie is still the reason he is in the position he is in. Is this alright? Or should i change it so he gains the injurie outside of his job or maybe he gets the property and titel gifted to him before he is injured? 1/3

Hi!

First thing about Balthazar, I enjoy that you describe him as energetic and friendly! Characters like this are certainly missing when it comes to facial differences in media.

[I also like that he has trouble moving the left part of his face - hey, that's just like me! :-) I don't see that often]

I don't think that having connections to morally questionable characters is bad. It sounds like you're just making a complex character, which is great. Doesn't seem to go anywhere near the "evil scarred man is Evil and Bad" stereotype :-)

The scenario behind his scar sounds okay. "Workplace accident" is obviously in the Always Traumatic trope bucket, but it's also the most plausible and common injury of that sort, which is nice (and reflects life much more than, let's say, "I was evil and got Punished so now I have The Scar"). But most importantly, you don't seem to merge Balthazar and his Accident into the same character - it's just him, he seems to have a lot going on, oh and he had this accident which influences his current position. His backstory having an effect on him while not being everything about him makes complete sense; that's how it should be! I don't see anything wrong with him being recompensated for his service. He was injured, unable to work, and got the help that he needed - sounds great!

I think it could also set up a premise that I never see around acquired facial differences - "hey, I'm actually glad it happened because I got all these new opportunities!" (here, becoming a part of the royal court and seemingly having a rather good time there?). It's something I see a lot of real people mention, but it's completely missing from fiction for some reason.

My only suggestion (the one that I always give) is to add more characters with facial differences, especially non-traumatic ones*. They can be side or minor characters, but it's still something I always recommend! Especially if fire-related injuries are more common in the setting, I think it would make sense to see more burn survivors just existing in the background of the story as regular people. *- doesn't necessarily mean "non-acquired". Illnesses can cause facial differences as well, both chronic (e.g. leprosy, severe rosacea) and acute ones (e.g. septicemia, Bell's palsy)! There's a lot of differences to be had :)

I hope this helps! :-)

mod Sasza

#mod sasza #foxmoth7 #face difference #burn survivor representation

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sawiet · 10 hours

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to be loved is to be seen

however it may sound harry is not the most empathic person in the world and in the books he sometimes lacked tact and consideration for his friends. but what never ceased to amaze me in the sixth book was harry's incredible powers of observation. almost all of the narrative in the books is told from harry's point of view and all the characters are usually presented through the prism of his perception. so we saw draco's suffering only because of harry. his sickliness, his thinness, his brooding, his pallor, his unusual quietness.

truly beautiful.

#harry potter #draco malfoy #draco x harry #harry x draco #drarry #hpdm #dmhp #hp #hp fandom #harry potter fandom #halfblood prince #to be loved is to be seen #my stuff

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querulousmegapode · 2 days

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Hello. Please, tell me what do you think about Angua. I'm personally struggling to like her after her words to Carrot, something about "why you are so supportive!?", when he didn't start a fuss about her being the werewolf.

It would be nice to see another point of view for the character. I hope it helps me to understand her better.

Thank you

Hi!! Firstly thank you so much for this ask! It’s a really fun one and I’ve been thinking over how best to answer it and figuring out what exactly I like about Angua so much, so I appreciate it a lot!

There are a few different reasons why I like her. Some of them are pretty superficial, so I think I’ll get those out of the way first.

In general I just think that she’s pretty cool! From a purely superficial standpoint she’s pretty and gets to be badass and a werewolf and that’s just kind of fun. The whole circumstances around people finding out she’s a werewolf are also just pretty funny to me.

I also really like her in terms of the way that she’s written.

I really like how Pterry writes women in general because he manages to write them in a way that doesn’t feel like it’s fitting into stereotypes about women? They’re all real people with nuances and I feel like Angua is a good example of that. Yes, she does get to be badass, but also she’s a person and has a lot going on internally. She’s got a constant struggle with trying to fit in around people and trying to be human which is something that I haven’t often seen around werewolf characters and I think Pterry explores it well.

Werewolves in media seem to go in a couple of pretty predictable ways. You get the general horror of someone turning into a werewolf and then it either seems to go in the direction of oh no the werewolf is a monster!1!1! Or oh, the werewolf has a pack and learns to live that way. For me Angua is interesting because Pterry goes okay, but what if a werewolf doesn’t have a pack?? Angua is pretty much estranged from her family; she doesn’t have anyone to help her with the experience and is generally met with fear and hostility when people find out that she’s a werewolf. She has to deal with a LOT, even people who mean well and actively like her (Cheery) inadvertently hurt her with comments about werewolves and that’s someone who doesn’t know she’s a werewolf!! I can’t imagine that other Ankh Morpork citizens are somehow kinder or more understanding. And in amongst that you get to see the inner conflict that Angua has. She comes to this environment and she doesn’t just magically adjust - she struggles with trying to maintain control when she turns and she struggles with maintaining humanity and seeming human, because that’s what people around her will accept.

I think that, for the most part, is why I can understand the way she reacts to Carrot, as it’s pretty unusual for someone to be completely supportive. I’m segueing slightly, but I do really like how her relationship with Carrot develops because it’s nice that she has someone there who accepts her without question. Carrot is just *nice*, with no ulterior motives or strings attached and that’s something she doesn’t seem to encounter too often.

The other main reason that I like Angua is how comedic her perspective is. She’s quite a funny character and consistently plays the straight man to the rest of the watch’s insanity and that’s really fun.

Her internal monologue is great for this because despite being a werewolf she’s somehow the most normal person in the watch.

I love those watch guys but Dear God none of them are normal about their job. I love Vimes’ POV very much and he’s one of my all time favourite characters, but sometimes it feels nice to just take a step back and view the watch through the eyes of someone who isn’t used to it. Angua is pretty great for this.

I also quite like seeing her go from incredulous to understanding about Carrot - she’s quite perceptive and figures out pretty quickly that he’s deceptively simple. She can also be quite dry in terms of humour, which I personally really like.

Overall I just think that she’s pretty neat! I hope that this has been helpful!

Ultimately though, if you still don’t really like her then that’s fine too!! Discworld is full of wonderful characters and the best part is that there’s no right answers about which ones resonate, even if one is particularly popular or well liked.

#discworld #gnu terry pratchett #angua von uberwald #carrot ironfoundersson #samuel vimes #asks #thanks once again for this ask!!!#I had a lot of fun thinking this through #rambles

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winwintea · 8 hours

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the last dance - huang renjun

PAIRING ▸ painter!huang renjun x fem!reader

GENRES ▸ romance, fluff, angst, lots of angst, supernatural, wayyy too much angst

WARNINGS ▸ angst. and character death

SUMMARY ▸ you've fallen in love with the gentle painter, renjun. though the locals call you a witch, renjun doesn't seem to care. but that all changes when they come to kill you. no matter how much pain it causes, you'll never regret falling in love with him.

WORD COUNT ▸3.7k (not proofread 😭)

AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ suffer

PROLOGUE | MASTERLIST

Something feels quite warm… it was an unusually comforting warmth, and it lay right beside you. You opened your eyes- “Renjun?” The source of the warmth was the human Renjun, who was lying next to you in bed. Strange. What is he doing asleep in your room? And yet, all your questions and concerns disappeared when you looked at his sleeping face. He was as beautiful as an angel. Renjun had more than an angel’s good looks. He had the heart of one too.

You recalled your first real conversation, just a few days after he’d arrived here. There had been an accident in the stables with one of our horses. Renjun was going to be trampled. You’d pushed him out of the way. He carried your bruised and broken body inside, apologizing all the while… “Oh, god…! Oh, miss, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean for you to get hurt! I should have gotten out of the way…!”

You felt so bad seeing Renjun blame himself, that before you knew it you were saying, “It’s all right. You mustn’t fear for me. I’m what they call… a witch.”

“A witch?” “See for yourself. My wounds…they’re gone.” You gestured towards your arms, displaying them for him to see.

“So, you can… cast magic?”

“...Not exactly. Humans are quick to label all they deem as frightening witches, but my true title is an eterni.”

“‘Frightening?’” “Yes. Those who know of us and this place fear it and refuse to talk about it. It’s all quite silly, when you pause to think!” I tried to laugh it off in an attempt to lighten the mood, but Renjun looked serious.

“You don’t have to smile if it makes you sad. You don’t have to lock away your emotions. That forced smile doesn’t look right on you. And they shouldn’t call you such awful names. As far as I’m concerned, you’re a person, just like me. And a nice one, too.” “But I’m not like you, I’m a-” “Your wounds may heal fast, but did they hurt when you got them?”

His point resonated with me. You’d never had a human care so much. The ice that had formed around your heart after so much pain and betrayal began to melt with his words. Could you… trust him? “See, Y/n? There’s nothing separating you and me. Nothing that I care about.” After that, you and Renjun began to spend more time together. To the exclusion of the other men Ricky had brought. That didn’t mean you expected to see him in your bed! Just then, Renjun stirred… “..mmhm..Good…morning… huh? Y/n? What are you doing in my bed?” “I’m afraid you’re in my bed, Renjun.” “...I am…?” Renjun sat up and looked around in shock. “... I woke up thirsty in the middle of the night and went to the kitchen for some water. I guess I ended up in your room. Sorry, I still don’t know this place well!” He was even charming when he was guilty. Renjun truly seemed descended from the angels. “Do not apologize. You were warm, so I was rather happy to have you in bed with me.” “Um.. you were?” “I mean, it’s not the fact that you were in bed with me that made me happy! It was-” Actually, there’s nothing incorrect about what you said. It DID make you happy. You couldn’t seem to explain it right.

Renjun leaned forward in bed, looking at you. “Are you saying I’m like a dog?” “A dog?” “Yeah. Like you felt happy because it was just like sleeping with a big, warm dog?”

Of course it wasn’t the same. Because Renjun, I’ve fallen in love with you…

You’d fallen in love with the man who smiled at you and told you, you were the same. He had let you feel what you’d never felt before. But you’d decided not to tell this to Renjun. For you were soon to leave this world… “There’s nothing to fear. I don’t think of you as a dog. Although, you are a bit like a puppy.” “Wait, so now I’m a smaller dog…?” “I simply mean that you’re cute. Now, you will want breakfast, of course. And after that, you’re going to paint, aren’t you?” He smiled and nodded. Truly, you couldn’t bear to darken such a bright smile with your grim fate.

—

Changing into his artist’s apron, Renjun set up his easel in the garden. He got to work quickly and quietly, the mark of a professional. Renjun’s profession was painter. He specialized in portraits.

“Now that the underlying sketch is complete, you’re going to add in the color-?” “That’s right. This is actually my favorite part of the job. Though it’s the most challenging.” In one hand, he held his palette, thick dollops of paint creating a cascade of colors.

While pretending to read, you surreptitiously watched Renjun at work. You had once asked him why he chose portraiture of all subjects. Renjun told you that he wanted to capture the emotions of his subjects in the moment. How they lived, not just the way they looked. You could see yourself spending an eternity with someone as wonderful as him. But that was wrong for him. His life and his work was so passionately mortal. Renjun captured what was everlasting. You could not take away what he was. “...Yep, it’s time for a break.” “Renjun, may I ask you something?” He shook his head and nodded, “I was hoping you could promise me something. Once the full moon comes, the gate will open and you’ll be free to leave the mansion.” Renjun nodded again, curiosity in his dark almond eyes. “When that happens, I want you to paint as many portraits as possible. To capture as many smiles on your canvas as you can.”

His voice was soft when he spoke again, “All right. I promise. But first, can you tell me something in exchange?” Those beautiful eyes of his suddenly became clouded, “Why did your butler bring us here in the first place? What did you need?” It was the question you’d most feared. “I’ve just been thinking. You haven’t tried to attack anyone, so… why?”

He was right in that he was brought here for a purpose. Renjun and the others had been brought here for you to turn into lesser eterni to continue the line… and save your life. But you had rebelled against that notion and chosen to fade away instead of sharing a fate you found worse than death… “There was no reason, not really! You see, it has been Ricky and me alone for so long now. It seems Ricky got the silly notion that I might want more company. That I would feel lonely now for the first time in centuries! It’s unfathomable, don’t you think?” “Well, I can’t say, since I haven’t lived even a fraction of your lifetime, but I don’t think loneliness is something you get used to. I think you can feel it at any time. And that you can’t easily ignore it.” Renjun spoke to your soul. His paintings could reveal someone’s true self; his words had the same power. “Hey, Y/n? After the gate opens and we’re let out, is it possible to come back? Could I come back and see you?” He wanted to come back here? Your heart ached with a desire to say yes… but you will be gone as soon as he leaves. “That would be a terrible idea. What if you got trapped here for another month? You should spend that time painting!” “I’ll find the time. I’ll make it work.”

“You really can’t. You mustn’t.” Renjun wasn’t satisfied but he didn’t argue, “Hmm. If I can’t… then tell me what I can do to help you now, before I leave.” How could he be so kind? If you could request one thing of Renjun… “Would you dance with me before the full moon has taken it’s place in the sky?” “You want me to dance with you?” “Yes. I used to love dancing, but I’ve lost anyone to dance with a long, long time ago. How does that sound?” “Of course I’ll dance with you. I might need some time to practice if I’m going to be any good at it. Can you wait a little?” You nodded, feigning a smile.

I’m sorry, Renjun. It’s true that I love dancing and dreamed of sharing a dance with the one I love.

Pureblood eterni stop aging past a certain point, which is why we can never stay in one place else we can be caught. And so you’d never sought out love, with a human or eterni. You could not risk them suffering the horrendous fate of your family. Please allow me this selfish wish. A last memory of you that I can carry with me until the end…

—

Ricky tended to the front gardens, though his heart was not in it. “Hmm? That is most curious.” There appeared to be a stake planted just outside the gate. Attached to it was a sign. “...This…is not good!” Ricky’s cries were unfortunately heard by Renjun who had happened to be nearby, “Hey, Ricky. What’s that sig-” Renjun stopped and read it for himself. The sign read: “The occupants of this cursed residence have been found guilty of witchcraft and will be punished with death.” “‘Witchcraft’? They must mean Y/n.” “How did you know madame has-?” “Early on, she told me she’d been called a witch before.” “My lady has done nothing wrong-! Some years ago, I..I had encouraged her to visit the city. But there was an accident. She saved people with no thought to her own safety, but when they saw her wounds heal rapidly, they called her a witch.” “She’s always sacrificing herself to help others.” Renjun’s gaze fell, his voice soft. “Ricky, have you gotten these kinds of notices before? Any threatening letters?” “No. Not since we hid ourselves away. This is all my fault. Because I trapped the five of you here, they’ve come to kill us..” Ricky, normally calm and collected, was shaken to his core; steel eyes now pale with fright. “The gates will open on the full moon. If they storm the mansion, there is nothing we can do. Oh, Madame, what have I done?” “Ricky, it’s going to be all right. If they do come, I’ll talk to them. Once they know we’re all right they’ll understand. I won’t let them kill Y/n or you. Listen, you had some reason for bringing us here, right? Some reason important enough to risk being discovered?” Ricky was startled out of his thoughts, though any words died on his tongue, “If you don’t want to say what it is, that’s okay. Let me say something instead… I’ll help you protect Y/n. No matter what. So don’t worry. I’ll be all right.” Ricky said nothing as Renjun continued on, “First let’s make sure the others don’t find out about this, especially Y/n, okay?” Renjun moved some vines to disguise the view of the sign from their side of the gate, “It hurt her enough to be called a witch. I don’t want her to have to know about this.” “Why do you care so much for madame?” “I guess I only have one answer to that… I love her. So of course I want to protect her.” Renjun spoke, his voice strong and true. “Sir Renjun, I must-” “What is it Ricky?” “If you are indeed… in love with the Madame, then I feel as if I must tell you something. Though my lady forbid me to speak of it, on the night of the full moon she will…” —

The final days passed frighteningly fast. At last, the full moon began to reveal it’s pale form beyond the horizon. You can feel it. Somehow, you know when the moon reaches it’s final point, your end will come. You changed into a dress suitable for dancing and waited for Renjun’s arrival. “I’m sorry to keep you waiting, Y/n.” “Renjun!” He met you on the balcony, stunning in his suit and his angelic smile. “You look especially beautiful tonight. Of course, you always look pretty.” “You think so?” “Yeah. I mean, I think you already know I’m no good at lying.” “I had some idea. Thank you, Renjun.” Renjun turned his hand up and held it out, “Will you give me this dance, my lady?”

You’d danced with stylishly dressed partners. Renjun, wearing the jacket he arrived in and a touch of moonlight, outshone them all. “...It would be my pleasure.” I lay my hand in his and we took our first steps together. There was no orchestra playing for us. There were no chandeliers, just the moon above. But you would rather be dancing here, than in the grandest dance hall. You had not expected your last night to end in such a pleasant way. With this as your final memory, you could happily turn to ash. Or so you told yourself. “Renjun, the gate will be opening any moment. It may already be open, in fact.” Renjun said nothing. Perhaps he was looking for the words to say goodbye? “Do not worry. There’s nothing you need to say. Though before you go, I wish to thank-” “Don’t say thank you like you’re saying goodbye.” His voice was still ringing in your ears when you realized Renjun was now holding you tight. “Renjun? Wh-what is it?” “I promise I won’t let you die.” “...W-what do you…?” “Ricky told me that if you don’t let a human drink your blood by tonight, you’ll turn to ash.” The peaceful lie you had created shattered. So it had come to this. “But then they become an eterni. And you’d rather disappear yourself, than do that to someone. Right?” There was nothing to say. He was right. “I don’t want you to disappear, Y/n. Won’t you let me drink your blood instead?” The arms that held me and the voice that pled with me were all shaking. “Renjun, I cannot do that.” “Why not?” He broke from me, his gaze pained. “Look at me, Y/n.”

Suddenly there were shouts from below. Angry shouts. They were getting louder. You leaned over the balcony to look out into the garden; you were shocked by what you saw. A crowd of humans were spilling through the open gates and into the mansion grounds. “...They’re here.” “Who are they? What is going on?” “It’s nothing. I’ll be right back. Please, promise me you’ll stay here.” He smiled as if to calm me, but Renjun raced down the stairs with frightening urgency. It obviously wasn’t nothing! You looked back at the townspeople outside your home. Torches and weapons–both real and improvised–held high. That mob. You had seen their kind before. You could not let Renjun go out there alone. No sooner had you exited into the foyer, you saw them coming in through the front door. They had taken Ricky. “Release the men you’ve taken prisoner and bring out the witch!” “I’ve been trying to tell you, we’ve already released them! As for the madame, I am afraid I cannot let you in to see her!” “He lies! I’m sure they’ve already killed them! MONSTERS! You and your devil’s mistress will pay with your lives!” Their cries for vengeance rose louder until they were furious and uncontrollable. They grabbed Ricky, restrained and shoved him, attempting to push him through the crowd at the door and outside. Five men go missing from the village. Of course they would come searching. And now, they’re here to kill us. I needed to do something, but fear–memories of my family’s brutal slaughter–froze me to the spot. Until I heard a voice. “She’s not a witch!” “Is that… Renjun? It’s you! You’re alive?!” “Yes, I’m alive! And she didn’t kill the others either! That’s why I won’t let you kill her!” You wanted to call out to him. They wouldn’t listen. “She’s bewitched you! Renjun, wake up! Remember who you are! You’re human!” Another added, “W-what if it’s too late? Where’s the witch? She may be speaking through him!” “No! Listen to me. I haven’t been bewitched and I’m not being controlled! Everyone, please. Let them both go. Put down your weapons so we can all talk.” “Renjun. All right. We can talk… just prove to us it’s still you. First, show us where the witch is-” Renjun was growing more and more annoyed at his peers, “Are you listening to me? She’s not a witch! I won’t let you see her until you understand.” “D-do you hear that? He’s protecting her! He’s become her familiar! It’s too late for him. Kill him! Then we kill the witch!” Two men grabbed him, one on each side. Another readied his weapon. You ran towards them. “Renjun!” Faster than a human could, you reached him; you threw your arms around him; you felt the blade that was meant for him piece you through. Over the fire and pain in my body, I heard a kind voice say, “Your wounds may heal fast, but did they hurt when you got them?” “Y/n…?” You opened your eyes and there was Renjun. Then he stared, stunned at his hand, red with crimson blood. “Your hand… you’re not hurt… are you?” “No. Y-you’re hurt… you’re b-bleeding… Why? I told you to stay there!” “I couldn’t… let you face them… alone…” Renjun looked in horror as the blood kept spreading. Your wounds were not healing this time. Your body had already reached its limits. Renjun turned his attention to the townsfolk as he shouted angrily, “Do you see now? Do you see what you’ve done? LOOK AT HER! She’s not a witch! Would a witch sacrifice herself to protect a human? W-would a witch-...?! …Get out. All of you, get out! Go! And never hurt this poor woman again!” What magic Renjun had used, I did not know. But his tears… an angel’s tears, had doused their murderous rage. Distantly, so distantly now, I heard the crowd disperse. When I opened my eyes, only Renjun and Ricky remained. “M-my lady, I will fetch some water! Give me… Just a moment and soon you will be-...” “No, Ricky… It is already time. Besides, I wish for you to stay.”

“Madame… this is all my fault.” Renjun on the other hand was equally as distressed as Ricky was, maybe even a little bit more, “Why? Why couldn’t I protect you? After I swore to keep you safe, I couldn’t!” “My dearest Renjun… You have protected me from more than you can possibly know…” He looked ready to cry. And so I took his hand and guided it to my heart. “You saved my heart from my fear…” “Your heart?”

“Do you remember…telling me nothing separated us…? And when you defended me just now.” I heard the quiet approach of death like the fall of sand from an hourglass. “It was thanks to you. I was able to save the ones important to me…I couldn’t die happier.” “Y/n…”

Thank you, Renjun, for descending from heaven to give me peace before the end.

You could not see him anymore. But you could feel his hand. You squeezed it. “R-Renjun…?” “What is it Y/n?” You felt him lean in close.

“I was happy for the time we spent together… I loved watching you paint. P-please, will you paint more…? Will you show… everyone… your beautiful art..?” “Don’t go… Don’t go, Y/n…!” “I love you.” Those words softly escaped your lips as quick as your breath left.

“Y/n? Y/n, open your eyes. Open your eyes and look at me once more…” Moonlight seemed to emanate from your still features, until your body broke apart and dispersed into drifting ash. Only the memory of your smile was left now. Not the smile of a witch or human, but of an angel… — Though it felt as if life itself might stop for those who lost Y/n, time continued on. A few months after that night, Ricky carried a bouquet of sunflowers to lay on the grave memorializing Y/n. It was Renjun who had arranged for her ashes to be buried here. And today… “Sir Renjun, is that you?” “Hey Ricky. I had a strange feeling I might run into you here today.” “But of course. This is where my lady rests. And I swore to serve her faithfully until death. But what brings you here…?” “I’ve been painting another portrait. It’s just about finished. Would you like to see it?” Renjun set the portrait upon the easel. Ricky covered his mouth with his hands. But his eyes-he could not look away. For etched on the canvas was Y/n, smiling at him with her gentle smile. Renjun closed his eyes and recalled the words he’d shared with Y/n, not so long ago… “Renjun, may I ask you something? I was hoping you could promise me something. Once the full moon comes, the gate will open and you’ll be free to leave the mansion.” He realized then that she might have always known this was how it would end. “When that happens, I want you to paint as many portraits as possible. To capture as many smiles on your canvas as you can.”

Renjun turned to look at Ricky again, “I promised Y/n I’d paint portraits and make lots of people happy. And I will. But before I got started on that, well, there was one portrait I had to paint first. It’s the portrait of the person I wanted to bring a smile to the most.” “I believe madame must surely be watching you and smiling right now. Just like she is in your painting…” Renjun looked at her image and smiled back, tears in his eyes. The last thing to do was give it a title. “A promise to your smile.”

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altschmerzes · 3 months

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every time a post/poll goes around about being aspec and fandom shipping enjoyment/engagement/whatever im like. NOW can we stop acting like being an aromantic person who enjoys shipping is some kind of Weird Outlier Situation? can we stop acting like this is an Unpopular Opinion or even Persecuted Outcast Take rather than idk, the default standard, just like everywhere else? idk romance repulsed aromantics Yes Including Fiction aren’t the default or even a significant majority and it really drives me nuts when people act like aros who enjoy shipping are somehow Not exactly that.

#gav gab #aro blogging #like gdspeed bud enjoy what you enjoy #glad you’re happy #but can we fucking knock it off with the ‘but am i VALID to be an aro who likes shipping?????’ stuff #like yeah dog you and fucking Everybody Else in fandom #a small handful of ‘im too aro for this’ from the handful of Yes Including Fiction Yes All Of It romance repulsed aros #are not persecuting you or taking away your aro card #anyways that goes along with my general opinion that #going around asking people Is It Valid To Be X Identity And Have Y Experience Or Opinion #is a fundamentally useless and unhelpful thing to do #and is unfair to yourself and to the person you're asking #bc you're placing your like #ability to Have An Identity in someone else's hands #which they did not ask for #and is not theirs to give or not give anyway #this one just super extra annoys me lmao #'am i valid if i'm an aro who still likes shipping?????' well if you weren't #most aros wouldn't be ValidTM #because that is not unusual at all #you know what IS unusual?#being the big mean aro in the corner who DOESN'T like shipping #no none of it yes including that one I Do Mean All

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kavehater · 1 month

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I support girls but NAH THIS IS REACHING “if you look carefully LIKE REALLY CAREFULLY 🤓☝️”

#the same people who would shriek like the witch of the north melting her skin off if I tell you haikaveh / kavetham isn’t implied because #if you actually look into our culture they’re being normal and not everyone having rivalry and caring about each other means they’re 💅#in fact Arabs are some of the worlds most hospitable people alhaitham letting kaveh live with him #is the most Arab thing I’ve ever seen #heck if kaveh was a stranger it wouldn’t be unusual for an Arab to let him in their house ☠️#goddamn #“if you look in the internet you can see how they’re implied!🤓☝️”#maybe if you had any respect for my culture or any desire to be educated when I’m handing this to you for free you wouldn’t be your mistake #your mums greatest mistake 🤗🤗🤗*#dora daily #if only ppl dedicated this level of detail to actual culture compared to pulling out their microscope at level 100x magnification lens to #observe robins spots under her eyes the world would be a better place 🙀#let me tell you btw this whole I hate you meh meh meh ( I’m so in love with you ) trope is the most whitest booktok millennial plant growing #basement dweller nonesense I have ever heard in my life don’t do that to my pookies ☹️#( the pookies in fact were 11 and 9 years older than her respectively )#guys my dad is the straightest man alive ( oh the trauma lowkey wish he wasn’t ) and he legit was putting his hand on his best friends lap #LMAOOO even I as a very logical person was like bro this is so zesty rn I am SO uncomfortable #anyways live laugh love boothill x Baizhu they’re the most canon things I’ve ever seen in my life #<- this is a joke btw it’s an ironic ship I saw on tiktok ☠️

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skrunksthatwunk · 4 months

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you go to a lesbian blog and find it says women only!! no men allowed!!! and go oh! excuse me, um, what about other lesbians? plenty of lesbians are genderqueer... and they go well, okay, go fuck yourself tim chop off your sweaty dick and stop calling yourself a lesbian. you do not have a dick, actually. you think about that fact often, even though it does you no good. you do not tell this person that.

you go to another lesbian blog and it says women only and you try again, and this time they change it to wlw + nblw only (non-men who love non-men :D). and you'll say hey i appreciate that but gender's not really that cut and dry for a lot of people. someone could be both a man and nonbinary, for instance. i just worry that you're looking at nonbinary as a generic third gender, or an extension of womanhood. i mean yeah you include nblw in your tags but all your posts are about pussy-havers exclusively. what's with that? and they say go fuck yourself you pervy man pretending to be a lesbian. you tried to sneak in but i won't let you.

so you go to a lesbian blog with a dozen or so posts about queer people needing to be more weird about it and you sigh in relief. but you still see the men dni. that's odd. hoping for the best, you say hey! i know you mean well but please maybe don't put men dni at the end of the lovely posts on your lesbian blog bc some lesbians are men. and they'll be like ok!! well you're allowed ;) and you say no that's not. no. some men are lesbians not just me. you think about your own dicklessness and wonder if that's why you were given entry. and you add that even if male lesbians are allowed, there's no indication of that. how would anyone know without asking? and they're like ohh gotcha gotcha well men dni + this is for sapphics only!! and you'll be like ok well that treats the concepts of men and sapphics as mutually exclusive identities and i just told you that's not true and you agreed with me so.. i don't think that solves our problem. and they're like. ok. fine. men dni but genderfluid and multigender people are allowed! and you're like no see that's. that's still the same thing.. you're saying the same thing just with different words. if you don't want men to interact but you're fine with multigender/genderfluid/etc ppl interacting then you either don't see them as Real Men (because they don't reach a standard of Full Manhood) or Complete Men (because they're only Part-Time Men), both of which suggest that they are, in some way, not men or less-than men, which is invalidating and defeats the point of the exception in the first place (accommodation) OR that you don't really mean the dni which is confusing and inconsistent and makes guydykes feel weird and uncomfortable and excluded from the lesbian space you're trying to cultivate. and they're like um. ok. so. cishet men dni? and you're like well i think that makes more sense, but what if someone identifies as both a cishet man and a sapphic? again, if we're trying to accommodate the genderfucky populace then that has to be a possibility that is considered. and they say god you people are never happy. what do you want me to do? what am i supposed to say to keep the right men out? and you pause. you empathize with the need for a space free from dudes trying to fuck you straight and feminine. dudes who watch lesbian porn and joke about what they'd do if they were allowed into girls locker rooms. who look at you like a piece of meat, and like someone who looks at women like pieces of meat in the same way he does. you get it. you know. you want a space where you can be sapphic, too. that's why you came to these blogs in the first place. you brace yourself and you say well i don't know that there are "right men" to keep out. i don't know that there's any single label that would accomplish whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. you could go for "sapphics only" or "queers only" and i think that might be the closest thing to what you want, but it's never going to be perfect. creating any exclusive space is going to shut out people you didn't account for, and the broader the label, the more people will be shut out that you didn't want to shut out. and what about people who don't know if they're allowed? what of questioning transbians, where are they supposed to go? and, frankly, i think i might rather my dykey posts get read and appreciated by a gay guy who sees me as a man than a woman who only sees me as a sacred womb, pure from male perversions or violence or whatever. i think community might just be more complex than a dni can handle. and they look at you and say i don't want to not have a dni. i think you're too permissive. you can't just "what about" or microlabel your way into everything. go fuck yourself, i bet you're not even a lesbian anyway. go find a real problem to get mad about.

you go to a lesbian blog. you ignore the men dni because you know you probably don't even count to them. or maybe you do count and, out of respect for your manhood, they'd shun you accordingly. you try to feel okay about that. you scroll past dozens of posts about mediocre men and gagging at straight friends' boyfriends and how gross and undeserving men are of the beautiful women they couple up with and how all women should be gay so they can get treated right and and and and and. you finally find a post about curling into someone you love and feeling at peace and try to lose yourself in it. you know that feeling is what unites you, what makes you belong. you try to focus on it. you think about carding your hands through a butch's hair or lacing fingers with a femme and feeling warm and loved and more yourself than you ever have before. like this is who you're meant to be. you read about lesboys and butch boytoys and genderfucky dykes and big hairy deep-voiced wonderful women (like you want to be someday, like you wish you could make yourself) and you try to ignore the men dni underneath each and every post. and you daydream about meeting someone kind and earnest at a lesbian bar even though you don't think any such bars exist within three states of you and you can't drink and don't want to drink because you need to be in control of yourself at all times so you don't fuck up like you're always about to and here in the nonexistent lesbian bar you feel wanted and safe and in good company. you picture your ideal, happiest self. it is a mistake. ideal-you has a goatee. not the mascara one you smear on and call drag even though you know it's not drag, not really, the beard you call drag because you think everyone would look at you sadly if you told them it was just to pretend you had something out of your reach. a beard that's soft and that you grew and that cannot be smudged away if you get too comfortable with it. the dream shatters. your people pull away from you, their scoffs mixing with the mind-numbing gay girl bedroom pop you learned to settle for just to have something that almost resembled you, they all pull away and turn their backs and do not look at you. you're too close to being a man now, even though you're the same amount of man as before. and they know you're not supposed to interact with men, not as you would with dykes, at least. and it sours. it's all your imagination, all in your head, but it sours.

you sigh. you think about how small you are. how short, how narrow, how feeble. how your voice pitches up when you talk to strangers because it's easier to speak quietly when it carries more, and because you're nervous. because it's a chore to talk, like everything is. you think about testosterone. you think about how your family would look at you, the questions they would ask, your answers they would only pretend to accept. the uncomfortable glances and whispered questions they'd try to hide from you. you think about how small you are, and how small you will always be. how you don't know of a way to fix it, but even if there was one, no one would want you anymore. you'd be the only one thinking it made you a cooler dyke. you think about how you don't even want a T-voice all the time, how you'll never be able to switch it at will, because you don't know how and can't bring yourself to figure it out. you think about how your throat closes around every hint of your own attraction. how wanting is perverse, how wanting is invasive, how wanting is embarrassing and too vulnerable so it must stay anonymous, as an online witness, and how you can barely manage to form or maintain friendships because your brain makes you pull away, always spinning out and struggling to recover from the simplest of interactions. how they'll all leave you and you won't chase after them at all and how that will hurt them. how stuck you get. how it looks like nothing's holding you back, how that frustrates everyone who thought you were going to be more than you were. the people you love who understand except when it comes to being ghosted, being shut out. how you don't want to hurt them. how you can't tell them that because you're stuck. how you turn to stone when touched, how you never reach out, how you lose your speech and can't look at people, how your autism is fun and sexy until it becomes real and you never see them anymore, how much you longed for someone who knew everything without you having to explain, and who loved you anyway. how unreasonable you know that is to expect of anyone. you think about that not-even-real lesbian bar. you think about how you still can't drive. how you can't leave your home on your own, without dragging somebody into helping you. how you can't leave your body. how you can't leave your manhood behind.

you think about finding another lesbian blog and ignoring everything. about skimming it for the parts you can juice some meaning from. the parts men ignore and don't understand, and how typical of you it is to do so. or the parts where you're not welcome and you should accept that, because it's for lesbians only. how you are a lesbian anyway. how you're meant to choose lesbian or man, how each is a betrayal of some kind to yourself or your people, your family, your lovely strangers, your rare friendly acquaintances. about the parts that tell you you're not wanted, that you're ugly and lazy and gross and insert yourself everywhere without even asking. about the parts that tell you you are hated, and how lesbians are above it all by rejecting men. how lesbians are each blessed miracles. about the parts that say you should be ashamed of being whatever twisted confused freak you are, of everything, of looking and wanting or not looking or not wanting, of picking and choosing instead of taking it all in with a smile. after all, shouldn't you take it? or is your ego too fragile, as men's so often are? aren't you tired? good. we're not here for your consumption. and we sure as hell don't want your company or "community" or whatever. didn't you read the sign? no boys allowed. and if you want to come in you have to make up your mind. as if you haven't told them the only answer you have. you're both. you're both.

you know you broke the rule by interacting.

but it gets lonely sometimes. you wonder if they know.

#before i maybe get yelled at:#1) no i do not think ppl are evil for having men dnis no i do not think these are all equal transgressions even #though there is an overlap that should be examined that i think is based in a degree of lesbian separatism + exclusionism #2) yes there are lesbian blogs and people that are cool about genderfucky people. i'm not talking about them #3) this is a stylized vent post about trying to find lesbian content on tumblr that isn't like this. all these dnis/rules are ones i have #encountered. no i do not literally tell these people to change their dnis to suit me. the conversations are symbolic and ideological in #nature. if i find a blog with men dni i generally go somewhere else. it's about emotions. it's about my feelings on that it's not literally #about dming someone demanding they change things. it's not about demanding that You change things or else you're a bad person.#4) it is about the conflicts and hypocrisy and inconsistency of strict and exclusive sexuality labels persisting in gender-diverse spaces #and how it affects me as a lesbian who is a man who is a woman who is fucking whatever else. and yes it is about transphobia too.#5) it's about how lesbians feel the need to exclude men and how i think efforts to do so fail and hurt ppl and are often misguided #tht i think also comes up in like. bi lesbian/mspec lesbian/gaybian discourse. i'm not any of those myself but it seems like there's overla #6) if this post seems whiny and sad and insecure that's because it probably is. i have a right to be all of those things.#7) no i do not think all lesbians are man-hating assholes. i am a lesbian. i love lesbians. i love dykes and most of them are fantastic ppl #i just think the general bullshit of the world leads to this defensive thing that ends up hurting others in our community y'know?#8) i get that my perspective/experience is a bit unusual and many lovely ppl haven't considered it. that's part of why i'm sharing this #nyarla dni #<- sorry man it's too vulnerable. gonna keep this one to the internet-only folks

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