#but now we’re gonna get a prom in september!!

[honeyquinns]

CLUB HELLFIRE

CHAPTER ONE

hellfire main characters

prequel

warnings // cussing, drugs, bullying, s1 steve, chrissy as a bully, toxic parent

——————————————————————————————————

1983

it’s September 7th, 1983, first day of school. Stacie’s first day of senior and Eddie’s … second but hell maybe this will be his year..

*alarm goes off* Stacie reaches her hand out to shut off the alarm but it’s simply not budging, “oh my god! enough!” she yells throwing the covers off her body and slamming down the clock, making it stop. she rubs her eyes getting the sleep out and pushes her hair out the way then she screams when Eddie catches her off guard “Eddie what the fuck!?” Eddie smiles at her brightly, hanging half way into window “GOOD MORNING SLEEPING BEAUTY! it’s the first day of school!” he says loudly sliding himself in, still in his pj’s flipping himself onto Stacie’s bed. “you’re a little too happy this morning… why?” she says squinting at him “ohhh just.. i don’t know man, i think it’s my year ya know?-“ he says with a face of realization “senior year number one wasn’t too fun. barely got the band started, never got to retaliate on Jason for the gym situation, didn’t go to prom…” she interrupts him “you didn’t even wanna go to prom” she says flatly “that’s not the point! but this year.. this year we’re gonna party like it’s 1990!” he says scrunching his face with his fist in the air “okay Munson well since this is our year how about you go get changed and i’ll meet you over for breakfast?? gotta get passed the ol’ drunk bastard” she says getting up looking for something to wear “hey how ‘bout we wear our hellfire tees today? i already gave the guys theirs and today we’re gonna have a club meeting.. you just have to come get yours” he asks. “hmmm yeah okay i’m down! now go away, i can’t allow you to see my goodies” she says shooing him out the window, “babe, we’ve been friends long enough, it would be an honor to see your goodies” he says smiling hugely “oh get out!” she says pushing him. he runs toward his window yelling “it’s okay! i’ll show you mine anytime” he flips into his bed looking back “yeah that’s because i’ll be the first to see it!” she yells back.

Stacie walks to her closet looking to see what would go nice with her Hellfire shirt. her and Eddie spent weeks on the designs, making it perfect for the club. when Eddie had designed the art, Stacie came up with the idea to call it Hellfire.

*flashback to sophomore year*

“what about this??” Eddie shows Stacie the art he made for their club. “that’s sick!-“ Stacie said with her eyes wide “but i feel like something to be added to it” they both though for a minute “what about D&D dice???” he says “yeah! and add a sword to it?” she asks with a statement. Eddie starts adding all the ideas to the piece of paper “…i could add a flail too” he says still doodling on. once he finishes they both look at it in awe “that looks fucking awesome” Stacie says amazed “i try” Eddie smirks still admiring the drawing. “but what should we name it?” he look at her and back at the drawing, “demon club? devils rejects? oh! hells bells club?” he says excitedly. Stacie looks at him with her brows raised “you have a very good talent for art but not so much everything else” she takes the piece of paper from off of his desk and walks around his room thinking “what about…Hellfire?” she looks up at him and he looks back at her smiling “Hellfire Club” they both just stare at each other without saying a word but knowing exactly what their minds are thinking “Princess Stacie i believe we’ve officially got ourselves a club” she’s nod at him agreeing “now all we have to do is bring in some members” she said.

*end of flashback*

Stacie decided to to wear her black high waisted denim jeans with a thick black belt, adding a barb wire chain on the side of her hip. she fixed up curls almost Donna Summer style, still wearing her pj shirt and threw on her busted black and white converse, grabbed her backpack and headed out to the living room where her dad Don was sitting. “pass me a beer, will ya?” he said in a low voice watching ‘Happy Days’ weirdly enough. Stacie grabbed 2 beers wanting to avoid any confrontation that could ruin her day except a lot of times that simply won’t happen with Don. “here you go..” she says in a low voice, setting both beers on the side table when he grabs her arm “i better not have heard that boy Eddie in your room this morning.” she jerked her arm back, holding her wrist from the tight grip he had “of course not” she looked down at her feet angrily, just wishing to have the courage to stand up to him at some point. Don stands up walking up, standing over her. he lifts her chin up making her look at him “that’s what i thought. i don’t want no devil worshipper in my house, let alone his pervert uncle” and that’s when made Stacie feel with rage. she thought he had a lot of nerve to shit talk Eddie and Wayne when they’ve always been the two to actually care for her. Eddie being her shoulder to cry on and always putting a smile on her face and Wayne making sure she had clothes and something to eat, even if he didn’t have much. all she wanted to do was just take that beer bottle and smash it upside his damn head but she knew it would turn bad for her. “whatever.” she pushes her face away from his and storms out the trailer, walking quickly to Eddie’s.

“hey stacie! come on in! Eddie’s still in his room.” Wayne said smiling. “hey Wayne” she smiles and slightly rushes walking toward Eddie’s room. “tell that boy to hurry up! i don’t want you kids to be late and there’s some breakfast on the table!” he yells picking up his coffee “you got it!” she shuts the door behind her revealing Eddie dressed in his hellfire tee with black ripped jeans, his beat up converse that he drew all over and his favorite rings he got from an antique shop. he was writing some lyrics with his electric guitar in his hand. Stacie skips over and plops on his bed “watcha writin’?” she asks. “juuust finished my last lyric to the song. do you think the guys would love it?” he hands her his notebook with the title “Hell on Wheels” as the name of the song. Stacie reads through it thoroughly. Eddie looks down at her grinning. he always appreciated the way she supported him and always took the time do the small things like read the lyrics to his music, helping him with his drawings, even defending him from bullies even though she was being bullied too. when Chrissy Cunningham and her army of cheerleaders would tease her and humiliate her in the girls locker room, she’d walk right out after retaliating on them then threatening Jason Carver or Steve Harrington after seeing them push Eddie into lockers. he admired the way she was able to stand up for herself and certain situations and he learned more to stand up because of her. He truly loved her and was glad that they were best friends.

he gets pulled from out of his thoughts when she speaks, “this is fucking awesome Ed” she smiled widely looking up at him “you think?” he smiled back “of course! it’s fucking metal. you’ve gotta perform this at the Hideout!” she sits up still admiring his lyricism. “hell yeah we are! but i have to ask and before you say no just hear me out” she looks at him knowing what he’s gonna say “i really want you to sing it” he tells her “no way! i only go to see you and the guys perform and that’s how i’d like to keep it” she shakes her head not wanting to deal with the stage fright and just simply not wanting to sing “but come on! you have the perfect voice! the raspiness is fucking metal, hardcore! all those times you’d sing along to The Runaways? Stacie i want you to” he said standing up and pleading “your voice is raspier than mine why can’t you do it.” she leans back on the bed “because my voice cracks and you know how to voice control. plus i wrote it specifically for you” he pouts his lips out, making his eyes bigger than what they already are hoping she’d give in and say yes. Stacie looked at him giving it some thought. for years Eddie has been pushing her to sing more and to eventually join the band. she sighs “alright Ed, i will-“ he starts getting excited “-BUT this doesn’t mean i’m officially part of the band. i’m just doing this for my best friend” he smiles grabbing her, yanking her into a hug. he’s way taller than her, him being 5’10 and her being only 5’1. her head leaning against his chest. “thank you Stacie, really” he says as they look up and down at each other. he pulls her back holding on to her shoulders “you won’t regret it! everyone is gonna love you” she smiles at him “i sure hope so.. now give me shirt and let’s go eat. i’m sure Wayne is gonna be upset if we let the food get cold.”

Eddie walks up to his dresser drawer, opening it to grab baseball tee hellfire shirt. he chucks it at Stacie and she turns around to put it on, looking back at Eddie “do you mind?” she asked to which he gave her a blank face “seriously?” she gave him the blank face back “so serious” he rolls his eyes playfully and turns around looking at the posters on his wall. Stacie takes off her shirt and replaces it with the Hellfire tee. she walks over to Eddie’s mirror hanging over his dresser and he follows standing behind her. she cocks her head to the side with a questionable face “what’s wrong?” he asks “it’s missing something.” she walks into the kitchen, where Wayne has already left for work. she grabbed a pair of scissors and walks back into Eddie’s room and goes straight back to the mirror. “what’s that for?” he asks again. she ignores him and cuts a piece of the tee from the bottom, putting the scissors down on the dresser and rips the top to reveal her belly pierced stomach. she smiles at herself admiring her work and Eddie smile along with her “pretty hot” he said she turns to him then back to the mirror “bitchin’.” she says.

they both grab their backpacks and head to the kitchen eating the now cold scrambled eggs and bacon that Wayne left for them. they left the trailer and into Eddie’s black pickup truck that used to be Wayne’s and they headed to school.

*at school*

Stacie and Eddie were standing at their lockers with Jeff, who they met through Jeff’s older brother James who was a basketball player that bullied them the year before, always finding a way to make Stacie uncomfortable and always pushing Eddie around. James was actually the leader to the gym situation with Eddie but he refuses to speak of it, even to Stacie. she was dealing with her own shit and he never wanted to tell her, she only knows bits and pieces. Jeff found out about it and that was the moment he hated his brother. he knew if he could do something like that to Eddie, what’s stopping him from doing it to Jeff or allowing his friends to do it? after all Jeff was also a ‘metalhead freak’. when he had started his freshman year at Hawkins, he apologized to Eddie and at first Eddie was weary about him. he didn’t trust him at all and swore he was exactly like his brother but Stacie felt him out and they ended up becoming best friends and letting him join Hellfire.

“man guess what?” Eddie beams toward Jeff “she said yes, didn’t she?” Stacie peeps her head out of her locker and looks at them both “you mean the guys knew that you wanted me to sing?” she asked annoyed “of course! i needed a back up plan in case you were on adamant on saying no” jeff chimes in, “and we would’ve had to beg on our hands and knees for you to say yes.” he grabs out his history book. “too bad i said yes already. i would’ve loved to see all of you at your knees begging at my feet like the royalty i am” they both roll their eyes playfully laughing at her. Eddie throws his black metal lunch box that he uses for certain inquiries only and grabs a notebook and pen, slamming his locker shut to reveal ‘Open this locker and you DIE’ written on it. “i’m surprised Mrs. O’Donnell hasn’t gotten into your shit yet over that” Jeff points out to his locker. “it’s because she’s full of shit. at most, she’ll give me detention and force me to scrub the paint off.. eeeven in the alley near the football field.” he said shaking his head slightly “so you’re okay with getting detention” Stacie leans back against her locker. “not exactly but i should be allowed to express myself. isn’t that what they teach us. ‘Kids, you control your future. YOU have the power to be who you want. Express yourself and love your life the way you want’” he say mocking the school principle, reciting what was said during the last pep rally last school year.

they all sit laughing when all of a sudden a hand slams against the locker above Stacie’s head. they all turn to see Steve Harrington standing right there. he nods at the guys “mop head, brace face” he said then looking to Stacie while the guys scoffed at his ignorant nicknames. “hey Stacie” he says smirking at her “what do you want Steven?” she says annoyed. “Steven? you know i like that you call me that.” he leans closer to her and she backs away “what do you want, assface?” she said annoyed once again. “oh Stacie, baby, you’re breaking my heart.” he says holding his opposite hand from the one on the locker to his heart, pretending to be hurt. “i was actually coming to ask you if you could tutor me for chemistry?” Eddie and Jeff look at each other unamused wondering what gave him the audacity to even ask her “and why would i do that?” she asks, crossing her arms. “because you’re like the smartest girl in his school.” “really?” she said still having her arms crossed, unamused. “of course. plus we have a little chemistry you and i.” “yeah more like her fist and your face” Eddie mumbled making Jeff laugh. Steve looked up at them angrily then turned back to Stacie smile “come on, what do you say?” Stacie sits for a few seconds to think “20 bucks.” Steve coughs from being shocked “what?” “20 bucks. every time you want me to tutor you, it’s gonna cost you 20.” she says blandly hoping he would say no. “deal.” all three of the ‘freaks’ looked shocked by his answer. “you’re not serious” Eddie said still shocked. “as a heart attack.” Stacie sighs at Steve knowing he’d keep bothering her “fine i’ll do it. but don’t try anything or Eddie will come over with his bat” Eddie smirks at her answer looking directly at Steve. he looks at both of them and back down at Stacie “i promise i won’t but believe me after one night with me you’ll be begging for me” he says smirking at her. “fuck off, Steve.” she throws her hand up to his face to keep him from being an closer and brushes away with Eddie & Jeff by her side, heading to lunch.

a/n: hi !!! i was so busy today so it took me a while to write this but i hope you guys enjoyed. don’t forget to reblog!! next chapter will be sunday unless i get too excited and post early. also any requests sent to me, i’m working on them currently and you’re welcome to send in more!

this will also be on my wattpad <3

#club hellfire #eddie munson #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson masterlist #eddie munson x black!reader #joseph quinn x black!oc #eddie munson blurb #fanfic #joseph quinn #joseph quinn imagine #joseph quinn fanfiction #eddie and dustin #eddie x reader #eddie stranger things #eddie my beloved #welcome to hellfire #hellfire club #stranger things blurb #stranger things #stranger things edit #stranger things 4

[mischiefandi]

IM GETTING A SENIOR PROM!!!!!

#im so fucking happy #i was so upset when it got cancelled and i know it’s so superficial and stupid #compared to what so many people are going through rn #but i’d been dreaming about this night for years and years #literally since the first day of school #my friends and i have been looking for dresses #it’s ridiculous #ik hahha #but it meant so much to us #when it got cancelled it was just another reminder that our senior year was over #and that we werent gonna get to do any of the things we had planned #but now we’re gonna get a prom in september!! #im so so happy #this just makes me so happy #🌸🌸🌸 #!!!

[st-crylo]

Rebound

Part 8

A/N: Sorry it took me so long to get this part out! Thanks for your patience, new update day is Wednesday nights!!

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of drugs

Word Count: 4.5K

Tagging: @haylaansmi @nankstasty @thomasscresswell @maybe-your-left

Masterlist

You took a deep breath, looking between your mom’s car in the driveway, and the front door of your house. She had to know sooner or later, and you’d put it off a little too long. Of course, you weren’t going to tell the whole truth, after all even the half truth would be too much for your mother. Taking another deep breath, you opened the door, and crossed the threshold into your house. 

“Hey, sweetie, how was school today?” she asked almost the moment you closed the front door behind you. Ah yes, the dreaded question that would kick start your news. You supposed there was no time like the present.

“Really good! I actually got asked to homecoming today,” you said, walking into the living room where your mom was sitting with your dad. You watched as her face lit up, clearly excited for what was an obvious win in her book. Oh, this was going to be painful.

“Really? Who asked you?” She asked, excitement filling her voice, causing your heart to pound from within your chest. Now or never. Now or never, you repeated in your mind as you gave a sheepish smile, rubbing the back of your neck.

“Ben Solo.”

As you’d expected, your mom’s face changed from one of joy to pure shock. It wasn’t an angry shock, after all even she had to admit that someone asking you out after what happened was a good thing, it was simply the person who had asked you. After the shock wore off, her face faded into one of discomfort.

“Honey...are you sure you wanna go to homecoming with him?” she asked, looking to your dad, who simply raised his hands and looked away, abstaining from this conversation. You let out a sigh, your smile turning to a frown. 

“Yes, I’m sure. He’s a nice guy mom, and he is trying to be better. Besides, we were really good friends until seventh grade,” you pointed out. Your mom still had a frown on her face, and she was twiddling her thumbs, trying to think of a response. You knew there was really no way she was going to say no, after all, she was the one who wanted you to live the most fun senior year. There was no way something as trivial as the boy who asked you to homecoming would change that. Though, just because you knew the facts didn’t mean you weren’t anxious about what she was going to say next. 

“Okay,” she finally relented, causing you to let out a breath you’d been holding in. “But I want you to promise that you’re going to be safe, okay?”

“Of course, mom. Besides, we’re going with a group, so there really won’t be any way for us to get into trouble,” you assured her, though you knew your friends were more than capable of finding trouble to be in.

“Okay, that’s good. The dance is next Saturday, right?” your mom asked, and you simply nodded. “Alright. Well, I hope you two will let me take pictures here. Why don’t you ask all your friends to take pictures here?” 

Just like I thought, you mused to yourself. “Yeah, I can see if they’re down!”

Soon, you were retreating to your room, pulling out your phone and dialing Sami’s number. It took two rings before she picked up.

“Hey, what’s up?” she asked from the other end of the line.

“Told my mom about homecoming,” you said, plopping down on your bed, laying back against the headboard and staring up at the ceiling. 

“Oh, sick. What did she say?”

“I can tell she’s not happy about it, but she’s not gonna say no. Also, she wants us all to take pictures here at my place. This’ll probably work out for Kylo too, that way his grandparents can take pictures as well,” you informed her.

“I’m totally cool with that, Mom’s not gonna be here that weekend anyways, so I’ll just get pictures from you to show her. What are you gonna do about getting a dress?” Sami asked.

“Was probably gonna go shopping on Friday for one. Can’t go Saturday because I have dinner with the Solo’s, so that’s gonna take my whole day to mentally prepare for,” you said, frowning as you thought of the idea of sitting down at a table with Kylo’s parents. Sami laughed from the other side of the receiver. 

“Well, if you want, we can go together. After all, you should definitely wear something hot, if Avarez is gonna be there. That shit will drive him up the wall,” Sami responded. You could almost feel the coy in her voice, and you laughed as well. Any excuse to get Shawn heated was good for you, especially after what had happened earlier. 

“It’s gonna be weird, seeing Kylo in a tux,” you pointed out. You’d never really seen him dress formally, he usually just wore his black jeans and leather jacket. To see him dressed up would definitely be new.

“It’s weird, seeing men like Kylo dress formally. Last year, Milo rented this really nice tux for prom, the vest matched my dress and everything. It was wild, but weirdly hot,” Sami said, causing you to shake your head. 

“Alright, well, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” you said, hearing your mom’s voice call you downstairs for dinner.

“See ya!” Sami said before the line went dead. With that, you got up off your bed and headed down for dinner.

***

The rest of the week seemed to pass by quickly, Friday seeming to appear in a flash, and as you settled down beside Kylo in English, you could feel your excitement grow tremendously. You’d never been so excited to buy a homecoming dress, and you honestly felt that it was more about the fact that you’d get to go shopping with Sami and Phasma. 

Phasma would be driving you three to Coruscant, where you’d meet up with Jordan at one of the malls there. Your mom had given you her card and said you could get dinner in the city as well. You’d never gone shopping in Coruscant before, so needless to say, you were excited beyond belief. 

“Calm down, you’re practically bouncing off the walls,” Kylo joked as you quickly pulled out your finished paper for Beowulf. You were so ready to move on to the next book, you practically threw your paper at Mr. Skywalker when he passed by. 

“Alright class, we’re going to be reading Hard Times starting on Monday. So, let’s get into some background, shall we?” Mr. Skywalker said from the front of the class, turning a video on from the projector. You tried not to yawn as the incredibly monotonous British narrator began to talk about Dickens, and the period he wrote in. 

“Can’t fucking stand Dickens,” Kylo said from beside you, causing you to laugh. “He’s only so descriptive because he was getting paid per word.” A fact that the monotonous video would soon bring up. 

You couldn’t really help but drift off a couple of times during class, and you were almost fully asleep when the overhead lights were turned on after the third video. Blinking to help your eyes adjust to the lights, you stretched your arms out, trying to hold back a yawn as you reached over to put all your stuff away. In front of you, Sami was lightly snoring, and was being shaken awake by Phasma, who was trying hard not to laugh. Once Sami was awake, she looked confused, and a little grumpy, as she wiped a small amount of drool from her lip. 

“Alright, I’ll be handing out copies on Monday. Before you leave, don’t forget to drop off your copy of Beowulf in one of these bins. I will hunt you down if you don’t turn it back in,” Mr. Skywalker said as the whole class began shuffling around, fishing for their books in their backpacks and putting all their stuff away. Kylo took all of your copies up to the front, briefly nodding at his uncle as he placed them all in the bin before walking back to your group of desks. As soon as Kylo was back, the bell rang, and the biggest group of students hurried out the door, heading for their cars or however they were planning on getting back home. You slowly stood from your desk and grabbed your backpack, putting your arms through the straps as you waited for everyone else.

As usual, once the crowd had passed, the four of you walked out of the English room, heading towards the entrance of the school.

“It’s gonna be weird, not having you ride home with me today,” Kylo stated, looking down at you. “I’m gonna be so alone.” Kylo started pretending to pout and cry, to which you playfully punched him in the arm, causing him to laugh. He shook his head before running a hand through his black hair.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine, provided you don’t make any stops on the way home,” Phasma quipped as the four of you stepped out of the school, stepping into the September sun. Kylo looked around first, noticed that people were watching, and he drew you close, pressing his lips against your forehead before bringing you in for a hug. You wrapped your arms around him, also conscious of the eyes watching you, before looking up at Kylo, who had that same smirk on his face as always. You smiled at him before the two of you let go.

“Text me when you get home, okay?” he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“I will. See ya later,” you said before turning towards Phasma and Sami, walking towards Phasma’s car. It was a quaint little car, just an old silver toyota, and you tried to keep up as Sami sprinted towards it.

“Shotgun!” she yelled as you and Phasma laughed when Sami reached the passenger door, desperately trying to open the door. Phasma used the key fob and unlocked the door, and Sami climbed in as fast as lightning. You laughed as you climbed in behind her, throwing your backpack on the other side of the back seat of Phasma’s car. Phasma climbed into the driver’s seat and started the car, putting her phone on a mount as she pulled up the directions to the mall Jordan had suggested.

“Thank God we’re getting dresses in the city, I need to get away from this town for a bit,” Sami said, rolling down the window as Phasma pulled out of her parking spot. 

“What about you, Phasma? I can’t imagine you’re the dress type?” you asked from the back.

“Nah, I’m trying to find a tux instead. I saw this cool floral one online and I’m thinking about wearing that, if I can find it. Who wants the aux?” she said. She held up the aux cord and immediately Sami snatched it from her, plugging it into the headphone jack in her phone. She then pulled up a playlist of music you weren’t really familiar with, but it seemed the same style that Kylo listened to. You thought about how funny it was, this was the first time in over a month that you’d been in the car with someone who didn’t have a cassette player. 

The drive to Coruscant was fun. Occasionally, Sami would play a song that the three of you could sing to, and as you watched the suburbs go by as you rode on the interstate. It was interesting to see the landscape change from rows upon rows of houses to the city skyline, skyscrapers rising and putting a feeling of awe in your heart. 

Soon, Phasma was pulling off the interstate, driving along with the city’s traffic towards the mall. Soon, and to Phasma’s relief, the three of you were pulling off into the mall’s parking lot.

“How come no one in the city knows how to drive?” Phasma said with a frown as she pulled into a parking spot.

“Ya know, I’m pretty sure they feel the same way about you,” Sami mused before pulling the aux cord out of her phone. The three of you all got out of the car, and Phasma put her phone up to her ear as she called Jordan. You pulled out your phone and saw a text from Kylo.

You ladies make it to the city okay? Also Gran won’t stop asking me about you today.

You smiled as you read the message, glad that Mrs. Skywalker liked you so much. You quickly typed your response back.

We made it better than we would have if you were driving. I have a feeling you’re a scary interstate driver. Also, tell your Gran I said hi, you responded before putting your phone away.

“What’s the dirt?” Sami asked, catching you smiling at your phone.

“Nothing, just letting Kylo know we got here safely, while also making fun of him. You know, the usual,” you said as you slid your phone into your pocket. Though you’d stopped looking at your phone, the smile still remained.

Sami nodded her head sagely as a car pulled up besides Phasma’s. She couldn’t help but think that if she didn’t know any better, she too would think you and Kylo were dating. Phasma put down her phone as Jordan rolled down the window, smiling at the three of you.

“Hello ladies!” she said before turning off the car and climbing out. When she was out, she ambled over to Phasma, who placed a kiss on her cheek before wrapping an arm around her shoulder. After that, the four of you practically strutted into the mall together, you and Sami following behind Jordan and Phasma.

There was something about going to a fancy mall in the wealthy part of the city that was just different. Of course you’d been to malls before, but to go into a mall with all sorts of designer brands and expensive department stores, it was a little overwhelming. You were in absolute awe as you passed each of the different stores, window shopping all the expensive items and wishing you had money for them. 

Soon, the four of you were heading into a Bloomingdale’s, which was intimidating to say the least. You and Sami exchanged looks as you walked in, knowing the price was going to be a little bit more than you’d anticipated. However, you heaved a sigh as you accepted that this would be a better way to not have the same dress as everyone else.

“(y/n), I think you should wear red or black. It’s very on par with whatever Kylo would want to wear,” Jordan says as you approach the semi-formal dresses. 

“Idk, I think you should wear a midnight blue. It’ll get Kylo to step out of his comfort zone,” Sami added as you all started to search through the racks. You pushed aside bright pink dresses and some weird green shades, but you never really found anything you liked.

“What about you, Sami? I know Milo isn’t gonna have time to come down, so are you coordinating with anyone?” Jordan asked Sami before pulling out a dark green dress, and holding it up to Sami’s figure.

“Yeah, Pat is my ‘date.’ We thought it would be more convenient, since, like you said, Milo is busy being a college student hours away. Also, that’s cute, let me see,” Sami said as she reached for the dress in Jordan’s hand. You laughed as Sami inspected the dress, nodding her head in approval as she examined. She then searched for her size. 

You pushed through a different rack of dresses before coming across a gorgeous blue dress. It had an A-line skirt made of blue tulle with a blue satin interfacing that ended a little above the knees, and a sweetheart neckline with off-shoulder sleeves. The bodice was beaded with small silver beads, making the top of the dress almost look like a night sky. With a smile, you rummaged through the dresses until you found your size. 

“You find something, (y/n)?” Phasma asked as she watched you. You simply nodded before pulling out the dress in your size, and holding it up. 

“Ha, I win. Midnight blue forever,” Sami said, sticking her tongue out at Jordan, who reciprocated. 

“Let’s try them on,” you said excitedly, dragging Sami to the dressing room. The woman at the desk led you to separate fitting rooms, and as soon as you were in, you were undressing, ready to see if you liked the way the dress fit on your body. As soon as you put it on, you knew it was the one. It fit your body amazingly, and made you feel so confident in it. You loved it with every part of your being.

Stepping out of the fitting room, you were greeted by Jordan and Phasma, who both smiled when you stepped out.

“(y/n), that is absolutely gorgeous,” Jordan said.

Soon, Sami was also stepping out of her fitting room. Her dress was very similar to yours in shape, but made all with satin. The forest green color looked gorgeous on her tan skin, and really made the color of her eyes pop.

“I love that,” you told Sami, and Jordan and Phasma both nodded in agreement. 

After you and Sami had decided that you’d found the dresses you wanted, the four of you then moved to find a blazer for Phasma. She ended up settling on a black blazer with a floral pattern on it. You, Jordan, and Sami all agreed that it made her look very sophisticated. Jordan especially loved it, practically fawning over her girlfriend, even after you’d all made your purchases. 

The four of you headed for the food court, where you decided to split up for food. You and Sami decided on chinese food, contently carrying the styrofoam boxes back to the table that you’d all decided to meet at. Taking a seat, you began digging into your food as Phasma and Jordan approached, each with food in hand. As Jordan and Phasma sat down, they too began to dig into their food.

“So,” Jordan started after swallowing a bite, “what’s the tea? What’s been going on at good ole Mos Eisley High?”

“(y/n) finally called out Shawn. It was badass, based on what Kylo told me,” Sami said, looking at you and grinning mischievously. You rolled your eyes before shaking your head.

“It wasn’t that big of a deal. I just wasn’t gonna deal with his bullshit anymore, especially since he tried to call me a slut,” you explained. Jordan had that same look on her face as Sami, and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Rich, coming from him. Anything else?” Jordan responded.

“Pat’s planning an after party for homecoming,” Phasma added, poking around at her food. “I figured I’d warn you guys that he’s planning to invite Hux.”

Sami’s fork dropped from her hand, and Jordan gasped loudly.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Sami asked, rage dripping from her voice. “I don’t understand why Pat still hangs out with that asshole, especially after all the shit he’s done.”

“I know. Also, was he planning to invite Kylo?” Jordan asked, her attention solely on Phasma. You couldn’t help but keep a keen attention on what she was saying either. After all, you only knew that Hux was the person Kylo’s ex had cheated on him with. You wanted to know more about him, though, to see why else everyone hated him. 

“That’s just the thing,” Phasma began, “he is planning to invite Kylo. When I asked him if he thought that was wise, he said that there would be so many people there, they probably wouldn’t even run into each other. I told him he’s being a dumbass.”

“Yeah, a dumbass is right. If Kylo sees Hux without first being warned that he’s there, Kylo will beat the shit out of him,” Sami said before taking another bite from her food.

“Maybe not. I don’t think Kylo wants little Armitage running off to his cop dad. That’s why he got put on house arrest in the first place,” Jordan remarked, causing you to become confused.

“Kylo told me that he was put on house arrest for vandalism,” you said. Everyone turned and looked at you, all of them heaving a collective sigh.

“Kylo would say something like that. Look, don’t tell him I told you, but Kylo was arrested because Armitage planted drugs on him. Luckily, he’s a minor, and on top of that, his mom has a lot of influence with the judges. They didn’t believe that the drugs had been planted, but they agreed on house arrest after his drug test came back negative,” Jordan explained.

“How did Kylo know the drugs were planted?” you asked.

“Because Armitage was at the park that day, trying to taunt Kylo into fighting him. Kylo told me that he went to the bathroom, but accidentally left his stuff outside, and Armitage must have planted them then. Also, the officer who happened to search Kylo was Brendol Hux not even ten minutes after Armitage had left,” Sami added. “None of us know all the details, so if you really want to know, you should ask Kylo. You should also warn Kylo about Hux coming to Pat’s after party.”

You nodded in agreement before going back to eating your food, thinking. It seemed like Armitage Hux had a personal vendetta against Kylo, and now you wanted to know why. Was it because of Hux and Stella, or was it something deeper? You would ask one of the girls, but this was something you wanted to hear from Kylo himself. You didn’t want to worry about speculation, and what might be truth or lie. 

On the way home, as you watched the city’s skyscrapers fade into the suburbs, you couldn’t help but continue to think, and you knew that you wanted to talk to Kylo as soon as you got home.

Hey, we just left the city. Is it okay if we talk when I get back? You texted, letting out a sigh as you waited for his reply.

Yeah, I have something I need to tell you, too. See ya when you get home, he responded. After that, you felt your shoulders tense up as you wondered what it was that Kylo needed to tell you. Deciding not to worry about it, you continued to look out the window as the three of you inched ever closer to home.

Phasma decided to drop you off first. As she pulled into the cul de sac where you lived, you noticed Kylo leaning against his car, smoking a cig and staring down at his phone. As Phasma slowed down in front of him, he looked up, waving at Phasma and Sami as you stepped out of the car. 

“Thanks for the ride, Phas,” you said as you waved goodbye.

“No problem. We should do it again some time!” She called out before she and Sami waved goodbye, driving away from the two of you. With a sigh, you turned to face Kylo, and you decided to lean against his car beside him. 

“So, what did you want to talk about?” he asked after taking a drag. 

“So, Phasma told me that Pat is throwing a homecoming after party-”

“I would expect no less.”

“And apparently he’s inviting Hux.”

You could almost feel Kylo’s jaw clench from beside you, and as you looked up into his eyes, you could see the fire of rage behind them. He was more contained than you expected, and as you watched him take another drag from his cigarette, you wondered if he were simply waiting to explode. However, when he sighed as he exhaled the smoke, he shook his head.

“Of fucking course. We’ll go, but if he tries to start something, we’re leaving,” he said. “Is that it?”

You thought for a moment if you wanted to ask him about his relationship with Hux, but you decided you would ask another time. You didn’t want to upset him more than he already was, so you decided to change the subject.

“Nope. I also wanted to tell you to get a dark blue tie,” you said, smiling up at him. He smiled back at you, but you noticed it didn’t reach his eyes. A part of you regretted telling him about Hux, but you knew it was for the best. “So, what did you wanna tell me?”

“Oh! Well, I talked to my mom earlier, and so, basically, the whole family is coming over for dinner,” he said, rubbing the nape of his neck and avoiding eye contact with you.

“Okay?” you asked, confused on why this was a bad thing.

“That means Rey is gonna be there, too,” he said in a murmur. Your body filled with cold after you heard that, and you couldn’t help but frown. First of all, this was about to be a very awkward dinner. Secondly, you hadn’t told Kylo about Rey, so you weren’t sure how he knew to warn you.

“Look, it doesn’t take a genius to know that my cousin judges anyone who’s dating me. You didn’t need to tell me that you and Rey had a fallout, I guessed it would happen eventually,” Kylo said, practically reading your mind. “I am curious why you didn’t tell me, though.”

With a sigh, you crossed your arms across your chest. “Because she said some things about you that weren’t okay. I didn’t want to reiterate those words to you because she’s still your family,” you explained. 

“Just because she’s my family doesn’t mean she always thinks highly of me, I accepted that a long time ago. Besides, if she’s thinking less of you because you and I are a thing, then maybe you need a break from her,” Kylo added before dropping the cigarette butt to the ground and stomping it out. He then reached over and picked it up, clenching it in his hand as he let out a sigh. “Look, my grandparents like you, and I’m pretty sure my parents will like you. That’s the goal, after all. I wouldn’t worry about what Rey thinks right now.”

You thought about his words for a moment before letting out yet another sigh. “Yeah, you’re right. Thanks, Kylo,” you said before turning to face him. He turned to face you as well, bringing you in for a hug. As he held you flush against his body, your arms wrapped around his waist, and his around your shoulders, you breathed in his scent, feeling a wave of calm overcome you.

“No problem, (y/n). I’ll see you tomorrow for dinner,” he said before letting you go. Once he did, you smiled up at him before turning around, heading for your house, ready to go to bed after your day of shopping.

[louthestarspeaker]

Right. So, fair warning, I’m about to get kind of ranty and rambly here. This has been the major thing on my mind for the past two months and my brain is getting tired of thinking about it so I’m gonna write about it instead because my brain is better at words than thoughts at the moment, but only slightly.

So. This year coming up, this September I should say, is my senior year of high school. It’s my senior year of high school and it’s the middle of a pandemic and I have no idea what the heck I’m actually going to do. 

I’ve always been fortunate enough to have a decision when it came to my schooling. I was homeschooled for most of my younger years, but when I switched to public schooling in my sophomore year I’d planned to finish out. No more switching back and forth, I’d made a decision. That’s a big thing for me when it comes to something like this, I’m a terribly indecisive person. Now I’ve got to decide all over again.

I like my school. I like going there and calling to my friends in the hall and seeing my teachers face to face. I like because it’s good. It’s very good, and I’d gotten used to it. But now, even though it’s opening up and we’re given the chance to go back there on a stunted schedule, I’m aware enough to know it’s not safe. And I have a choice to learn remotely the whole year, which is a brilliant option, except learning that way was hard, and I wasn’t happy there like I was before. And I have the choice I’ve always had- to choose how I want to learn, and I can go back to homeschooling or do it remotely or use a whole new online school because my parents are giving me the choice. Because it’s my last year. And I’m frustrated because I suck at actually deciding things and I wish someone would decide for me, except I know I’d be angry if they did.

And I’m trying to remind myself that in the grand scheme of things senior year isn’t really so big is it? It would’ve been a lot like other years had it been normal. But I was so looking forward to it. I wanted to go to prom and my senior trip like my brother, and I was going to be a teachers assistant for an English class, and I adore my French teacher and I want to be in her classroom. 

And half of me is saying that this is a pandemic, that everybody’s making sacrifices and losing out on things and I just have to make it work. But the other half is saying that i’m allowed to want the things everyone else got, and I’m allowed to be upset that I’m not going to get them. And I know I’m not. I know I’m not going to go to prom, or sit in my French classroom, or call to my friends down the hall.

I’m not going back to that building. I’m smart enough to know I shouldn’t, and I’m not about to put my family at risk like that. I just wish, I wish so many things right now. But I’m blessed to have a choice, so so fortunate to be given a chance to decide when so many don’t. I just wish the choice was easier, that we didn’t have to choose at all.

But this helped. And I am going to be fine. Because something is happening to the students in America, to the young people all around the world. We’re being forged in fire, so that means we are strong enough to withstand it.    

#lou rambles #covidー19 #student life #america

[puckinghell]

Idk maybe prompt 13 from the most recent list with Carter Hart?

Having been Carter’s best friend since the start of it all, you’re pretty used to being his “plus 1″ to all kinds of events. It’s the first time, though, that it’s a fancy charity ball, and you’re not quite so sure if you belong in situations like this.

“Cart,” you whisper in his ear, “I think people are staring.” 

He rolls his eyes. He looks stupidly good in his tux and he looks completely comfortable and you’re pretty sure you don’t look like that, not in the dress you had to buy specifically for this event, not in the heels you wore to prom and then never again, not surrounded by all these other girls in beautiful dresses who clearly do this all the time.

“Nobody’s staring, Y/N,” Carter says softly, quickly squeezing your hand, that he’s been holding ever since you got out the car. “Everyone here just cares about the free booze.” 

“I thought people cared about the charity.” 

“In an ideal world, yeah.” Philadephia is cold at night, even in September, and you shiver, trying to huddle a little closer to Carter. You’re waiting to get inside - have been waiting, for a while now - and you’re just starting to wonder whether or not you’re gonna lose a toe to frostbite before you get there, when the line moves and suddenly you’re up.

“Carter Hart,” Carter says, and the very buff looking doorman scans a paper before nodding. Then, he looks at you.

“And who is this?” He doesn’t sound particularly unkind, but he also doesn’t sound thrilled to have you here. 

You’re already ready to bolt when Carter turns to you and says: “Oh, that’s my girlfriend.” 

The doorman - bouncer? - frowns and looks you over; he’s not gonna buy it, you think, of course he’s not gonna buy it, why would Carter have a girl like you when he could have anyone he wanted, why would...

“Okay,” the doorman says, and then Carter is pulling you inside. 

“So,” he says, “drinks first? Or do you wanna go say hi to the guys?” 

You decide on drinks and it’s not until you’re standing at the bar, plastered against Carter’s side cause there’s not a lot of space and there is a lot of people, when you gather the courage to ask the question that’s been on your lips since you stepped inside.

“Why do you do that?” you mumble, and you only know Carter hears you cause he glances over at you quickly. 

“Do what?” 

“You do that a lot. Pretend we’re a couple. Call me your girlfriend.” 

“I don’t do that a lot,” Carter defends, flagging down the barman. He’s been legal to drink for over 2 weeks now but you don’t think the guy behind the bar would’ve cared either way.

“You do,” you say. “You do it all the time. And I don’t mind, but, like, we’re not a couple”  Except I do mind, because it makes me hope for things I can’t have. But you don’t say that. 

“Maybe not now,” Carter says with a grin, taking the drinks from the bar, “but one day, hopefully. And by then, I’ll be used to saying it.” 

He leaves, then, leaves you standing there with your mouth open wondering what the hell just happened, and it takes you a solid three minutes to decide you should probably follow him.

He’s talking to some old man in a suit, and you figure now is not the time, but you know you’re gonna have to talk about this at some point.

And for the first time, you feel like the hope in your heart might not be completely unwarranted. 

#carter hart #philadephia flyers #bff to bf blurb #nhl imagine #Anonymous

[thelittleredheadedmusician]

My high school dating experience is like a teen movie:

My first (of 2) boyfriend I started dating in eighth grade and it was The Most middle school relationship. He asked me out via note w/ the check yes or no boxes & everything. I was in band (& orchestra) all thru school & my best friend did chorus with him, I found out later that she talked him into asking me out cause he had a massive crush on me (which is why he’d been avoiding me while I was pissed cause we’d been friends since kindergarten). But, he asked me out. We went to A Lot of movies w/ one of our parents. We played pool & hung out in my pool. It was all really innocent and sweet. We even went to build a bear together.

(First sign I was ace, he & my friends conspired so he could kiss me & they covered as he took me onto my back patio & tried. I just noped out of there & never kissed him. Ever. No regrets on that one.)

We get to high school: I’m in marching band & have new friends & he’s in cross country & stops by our practices after his, meets my friends, & it’s fine. School starts, he meets me at my locker at the end of the day, walks me to the bus, we chat, & all our friends (freshman music nerds) think we’re adorable & life’s fine. At least I think it is. Then the kiss thing happened. A few weeks later he walks me to the bus & breaks up with me. I’m blindsided but not heartbroken cause like I’m me & it wasn’t ever really all that serious. But it’s over. Whatever. I’ve borrowed the book Wicked from a friend to read for the first time & I’m deeply invested so it’s fine.

Our schedules never lined up during the day & I’d texted our friends that he’d broken it off right away so I’m no longer thinking about it by the next day. I’m sitting in biology reading Wicked waiting for class to start when this flute player a year older then me comes rushing in. (I would later grow to hate her but the feeling was mutual & does not relate to this story.) She comes up to me & goes “I just saw something & it’s really going to hurt you but I feel the need to tell you.” Now I’m self aware enough to say I’m a bit of a masochist when it comes to my feelings so I tell her to just say it. She goes “Your boyfriend’s cheating on you. I just saw [now ex-boyfriend] making out with some girl in the hall.” I blink at her & go: “Oh. Ok. Well we broke up so. That’s kinda fast but like whatever. He can do what he wants I guess.” She flips out. I shrug it off. Biology starts.

About a week later I’m approached by a trumpet player friend a year older than me saying he really needed to talk to me about this guy. We weren’t super close (we would get close but not from this) & I had probably gotten my hands on The New Teen Titans by this point & was tearing thru those so I’m curious but not concerned. He tells me that he has lunch with Ex & had since the beginning of the school year, that Ex apparently didn’t have any friends in this lunch but saw a bunch of band kids, knew they were my friends, & asked to sit w/ them. They were apparently very confused but agreed & that was that. One of the senior band kids had another senior friend who sat w/ them too so this table was all band kids, Ex, & this senior girl. Apparently, Girl was flirting w/ him from the start but he said he had a girlfriend & that I was in band but she never let up. My friend goes on to tell me eventually Ex started flirting back & as of a week ago they’d started acting all coupley & kissing at lunch; he knows we broke up but he thinks she convinced Ex to do it & the whole thing just isn’t sitting right &!that I should know. I thank him, say it’s weird Ex would sit w/ my friends & not his own to begin w/, am now a little mad, & the two of us keep talking about it but really that’s that.

2 weeks after we’ve broken up Ex starts acting weird & rude to our mutual freshmen friends, including my best friend who set us up. Eventually he stops talking to them all together & says it’s cause his girlfriend doesn’t want him talking to other girls, especially none that are friends with me. Trumpet player tells me that she’s started being Super controlling w/ Ex at lunch & about a month after I’m mad cause this girl is lowkey abusive, making all of my friends miserable, trashing me, & I don’t even know who she is. They go to prom together, he seems thrilled, everyone else is super pissed that she’s controlling him & that he doesn’t see it. Meanwhile, I haven’t spoken to him since we broke up.

The next year we end up in English class together. We became friends in kindergarten because the miracle of the alphabet meant we sat next to each other. Guess what happens? Yup. Well the room is weird so he’s actually in front of me, I can only get to my desk shoved in the corner by passing him. The first day he didn’t even look at me. The next day I cornered him & pretty much said “we’re going to have to work together. I’m not even mad. Can you just talk to me? If you don’t want to be friends we don’t have to.” He apologized, said they broke up & he was taking a break from dating & we went back to being friends! He started talking to his old friends again! Then he went back to normal. & then slowly turned into a dick. But that was on his own w/out a controlling girlfriend.

Second relationship had drama prior to me entering the picture.

When I was a freshman the band’s assistant drum major was a junior who (for her hair) we’re gonna call Ginger. She was a piccolo, super talented, strong willed, could be mean, but mostly just driven & outgoing. She was going on four years dating the tuba player, also a junior, who was quiet, funny, super nice, & a bit of a little shit. They were the band power couple & everyone knew it. Now, Ginger & I quickly became friends because we had really similar personalities & just clicked (we also kinda looked alike though I was taller & my hair was darker).

Their senior year there was a group of us who hung out all the time & were just close. It was mostly seniors including them, myself, & a few others. Ginger was drum major & it was really obvious to everyone in band I was going to be drum major one day too.

That year was fun! Then the seniors all graduated & were off to college. The power couple were going to school together & we all just kinda thought they’d graduate, get married, buy a house & have kids. & their kids would do band. That’s a nope.

In September a girl their year from the guard got a Snapchat from a guy friend of hers. He was sitting on his bed with a girl in his lap. Who she recognized. As Ginger. She immediately texted the tuba boy saying “this is really awkward & I feel awful but I think Ginger is cheating on you.” He confronts Ginger & she admits to it. They break up.

I’m a junior in high school, bummed most of my friends graduated & being slowly driven miserable by the drum major (flute player from before!). I had been texting my friends while they were at college, Ginger stops texting back & Tuba Boy tells me about the breakup. I tell him I’m sorry but I’m here for him. We end up texting A Lot & wound up getting really close and in December he asks me out. Not knowing what else to do I say yes.

Our first date I’ve actually talked about on here before. It’s in my high school story tag & is worth the look. We were hot gossip for the next 6 months until it was decided I wasn’t a rebound despite indicators. We broke up after I started college (almost 2 years later) & he still buys his mom flowers from my mom.

#personal #true story from high school #long post #i owe 100% sober theater kid house party in the woods stories #thats next on my bs mini memoirs that these lowkey are lol

[hellfirenacht]

Can't Be Unseen Chapter 1

Fandom: Sally Face

Pairing: Sal x Reader

Summary: Flirting is fun, but flirting with Sal Fisher is the most fun of all. 

Ao3

It wasn’t exactly a secret that you were a huge flirt; everyone in your friend group got a taste of it, no matter their gender or sexuality. Larry gets a new shirt? Double pistols and a wink. Todd comes to school wearing contacts? Compliment him on his eye color as he rolls his eyes and reminds you that he’s gay. Ash tries out some new makeup look? She’s once again made a masterpiece of her flawless canvas of a face. 

Flirting was almost second nature to you, but there was one boy whom you liked flirting with the most; your friend Sal “Sally Face” Fisher. You could hardly help yourself around him. Something about his cute short stature, blue pigtails, kind attitude, and sweet guitar skills had you swooning. He was almost like a porcelain doll, though his prosthetic was actually made out of a more sturdy plastic. 

Still though, you never missed a chance to compliment him or flirt with him or even just talk with him. You had known him for 2 years and in that time he’d become someone who you’d felt totally comfortable and happy with. Developing a crush on the boy wasn’t exactly in your plans, but it happened anyway. Despite his obvious feelings for Ashley, you were content just spending time with him. Besides, covering up your crush with the endless flirting made it much more easy. 

It was early September when you two were walking home together with Larry. The crisp fall air wasn’t too cold yet, but comfortable enough for flannel and t-shirt combinations. 

“So Ashley’s seeing someone from another school now, huh?” Larry said, looking over at Sal. 

“Yeah, she seems really nice.” Sal said, “I hope we get to meet her sometime.”

“Aren’t you bummed though?” Larry replied. “I mean, I know you liked her and all.”

“That was last year.” Sal shrugged. “I still think she’s pretty, but I don’t think I’ve liked her like that for a while now. I’m happy that we’re friends, that’s all.“ 

You couldn’t help but look up from your phone that you’d been distracted by to listen in on their conversation. Sal didn’t like Ash anymore? Why was this news to you? 

"You’re a mature dude, Sally Face.” Larry nodded as all three of you wandered down into the basement of Addison Apartments. 

It had become a habit by this point- come home from school, go to the basement to do homework, listen to music and hang out, then go home. You all had tried to do homework while listening to music, but it turned out to be more of a distraction than a help. Larry would end up on a tangent about the song, Sal would be listening while his hands would start faking an air guitar, and you just couldn’t handle that much noise when trying to study. 

As you all settled into Larry’s room, a small beeping sound emitted from Sal’s bag. His phone’s alarm went off, reminding him to take some of his many medications. 

“Be right back!” he said, scurrying into the bathroom. You and Larry both had assumed a while ago that some of the medicine involved taking off his face. Though you had both seen it- well you had captured a split second glance on accident once- it was agreed upon that you give him privacy when it came to his face. 

You looked over at Larry who was digging through his bag, pulling out loose pieces of paper, trying to figure out which ones he needed to start his homework. 

“Dude, just get a binder. Or a folder!” you said, watching him. “Hell, I’ll give you one of mine. Your school organization is seriously stressing me out." 

"It’s fine, it’s fine.” Larry replied, as you heard a paper rip. “Woops." 

"Was that the math worksheet?" 

"I think so?” he handed over the paper to you. 

“Larry, this was last week’s homework! We even did this one together!”

“Hahaha, good thing they didn’t check it." 

"They did.”

“Oh… shit.”

You looked over at the bathroom door for a sec, hesitating a moment and lowered your voice. “I think I’m gonna ask him on a date.” you said, pulling out your own homework. 

“Who? Sally Face?” Larry asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“No, your mom. I’m gonna date your mom and you will be my new step-son.” You replied dead-pan, but then smirked. “Then we can add to the ever growing list of the not-related category on porn hub.”

Larry laughed. “If that wasn’t so messed up I’d almost be down. But seriously, you finally gonna do it?”

You nodded. “I’ve been thinking about this seriously ever since he admitted that he doesn’t like Ash anymore.”

“So, fifteen minutes.”

“Yes.”

“Good luck. I don’t think he’s ever been on a date in his life." 

"Then I’ll just have to make it special. If he agrees that is.” you shrugged. 

“If who agrees to what?” Sal asked, walking out of the bathroom. 

“I’m asking Lisa on a date.” you replied back quickly. “Gonna sweep that sweet lady off her feet, then Larry’s gonna have to call me ‘mommy’ too." 

Sal laughed, "Good luck with that. She’s been spending a lot of time with my dad lately, I think they’re going on a date this week.”

“Is that all that’s standing in my way? Then I’ll just have to date your dad too. Then you’ll both have to call me ‘mommy’." 

"Whatever you say.” Sal laughed, plopping down next to Larry. 

…

Despite it all though, it took you at least a month to work up the nerve to actually ask Sal out. Deciding that you wanted to was easy, but planning a date was becoming a little more difficult than you anticipated. You were sure he’d be happy with anything that you took him to do- but this was if he agreed to the date in the first place. 

Larry suggested taking him to the Sanity Falls concert that was coming up, but you declined that. Sanity Falls was very much Larry and Sals’ thing- not something that you’d ever want to take away from them. Plus, if you were being honest- Sanity Falls and heavy metal wasn’t fully your thing either. Sure you knew more about that band than anything else, but that was because of all the time you spent around the boys. 

In any case, a concert in general didn’t seem like the best idea for a first date. You’d have to get the tickets in advance and even with your part-time job, that was still a bit of money for an evening where you couldn’t even talk to him. You already had a bit of a job listening to his slightly muffled voice, you didn’t want to put loud music and screaming teens on top of that. 

You found a similar dilemma with dinner and a movie. It seemed too cliche, really, and not that personal. Besides, you all had done that a million times before. You weren’t just getting to know Sal at this point- you wanted to woo him! You wanted to make him feel special! You also wanted your feelings to reach him. 

The mall was a no-go. Sal didn’t really like shopping that much, and he usually got harassed by mall security for “wearing a mask”. 

It was too cold for the water park.

Walking around town just seemed like you hadn’t tried at all to plan anything. 

Nothing was coming together at all. 

You groaned and scribbled out what you were working on in art class for the tenth time. Your hands were covered in charcoal, and it was getting everywhere at this point. 

“What’s wrong?” Ash asked, next to you. “That one wasn’t so bad.”

“It’s not the assignment.” you admitted. “I… okay so I’m gonna just tell you. I wanna ask Sally on a date but I have no idea where to take him assuming that he’ll agree." 

"You like Sally?” She asked, a bit surprised. You nodded. “Oh, that does make sense. I thought you flirted with him a bit more than anyone else." 

"He’s sweet.” you said, looking down at your paper again, flipping to a clean page and scribbling to give you something to look at. “And he’s more kind than anyone I’ve met. He talked to Travis once and since then he’s stopped using those words. He’s… got this quiet confidence you know? He turned a cruel nickname into something he wore with pride. He stands up for himself. Sal… even with his self-esteem issues with his face, he… how do I put this? We’re all afraid of rejection, he is too. But he also knows that if someone rejects him, then that’s not the end of it. He always gives people a chance to actually know him. He’s stronger and more brave than anyone else I know.”

“Wow, you’re serious about this, huh?” Ashley said approvingly. 

“Plus did you see his butt when he was wearing that dress at the last Homecoming dance?” you asked, doodling said butt. 

Ashley laughed. “He did look great.” she agreed. 

“I just don’t know what to do.” you admitted. “I like Sal, I really really like him and I want him to give me a chance. To see me as more than just a flirt, you know? But if I can’t even think of a good date to take him on…" 

"He’d love whatever you plan.” Ash replied. “But I understand what you mean. Do you have any ideas at all?" 

You handed over the list, complete with commentary from you and Larry in the margins about why it wouldn’t work or was too expensive, or too not-Sal or too not-you. 

"Prom’s out?” she asked. 

“Prom’s next spring.” you explained. “I mean, I know there’s no time limit on asking him out, but that’s a bit far off. Also just feels like too much for a first date, you know?" 

She nodded and continued down the list. "Yeah, I see what you mean.” she said. “You need something that you can do together that doesn’t lean more towards one person’s interest, that still gives you a chance to talk and get to know each other, and that isn’t super expensive." 

"First dates are stupid if you already know someone.” you grumble. 

“…Oh! I have an idea!” Ashley suddenly grabbed a paper towel in an attempt to wipe off the charcoal on her hands. I got this flier in the mail the other day, I think this would work perfectly!“

You took the flier from her hands carefully as to not make a mess of it. "Fall Festival…?” you read. “Ash, this is perfect!" 

"It’s every weekend until mid-November.” she said, pointing. “Plus there’s a Halloween weekend as well! I think that he’d really like that." 

"Ash, have I mentioned that you are the most amazing and beautiful person I’ve ever met?” you asked. She just laughed. 

“Save it for Sal.”

…

“So you really gonna do it today?” Larry asked, leaning next to your locker. “I’m gonna miss your constant flirting when you and Sally Face get married.”

You snorted. “It’s okay, you can still call me 'mommy’ if you want, but you’ll have to call Sal 'daddy’.”

“Thanks, I hate it."Larry laughed. "Besides, he’s basically like my brother. He can’t be my brother and my dad at the same time.”

“Not with that attitude!” You closed your locker and pulled your backpack over your shoulders. 

“But seriously,” Larry said. “I hope it works out for you. I think you two would be good for each other.”

“Thanks.” you said quietly. “I’m honestly really nervous but I know that even if he says no today, he’ll still be my friend.”

“That’s just the kind of guy he is.” Larry agreed. “And for what it’s worth, he thinks your pretty.”

“…What?” you snapped your head to look at his shit-eating grin. 

“Oh yeah, I may have done some slight digging and wing-manning for you. Got him to tell me some things.”

“What things?!” you demanded. “Tell me everything word for word exactly what he said." 

"I’d love to, but he’s right behind you and as I recall you’ve got an important question to ask him." 

You whipped around behind you and saw the tell-tale pigtails bobbing along down the hall towards the two of you. 

"Larry, I’m gonna kill you one day.”

“You’re welcome." 

"Hey guys.” Sal said as he finally approached you two. “Ready to head home?" 

"Actually, I gotta go pick up some stuff for my mom today.” Larry said casually, lying through his teeth. 

“Oh, well we can come along and help out if you want.” Sal replied, but Larry shook his head. 

“No worries, I got it. You two go on ahead and we’ll catch up later, mk?" 

"Alright then.” Sal nodded, turning to you. “So are you ready?”

You smiled down at him, at 5'2 he was a good 4 inches shorter than you, but it hardly mattered. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” you replied. 

The late-October sky was a bit dark and gloomy with the threat of rain. You zipped up your jacket and hugged yourself for warmth as the wind blew around you. You were starting to regret choosing to look cute over warm today. 

It was quieter walking with Sal without Larry there, but not uncomfortably so. Sal could be both chatty and quiet and it suited him either way. Though normally you wouldn’t mind the quiet, you needed to think of some sort of topic that you could use to segue into asking him out. 

“It’s too damn cold.” you said, blurting out the first thing that came into your mind. 

“It’s only 58 degrees.” Sal replied. 

“Yes, that’s borderline freezing where I’m from." 

"I can keep warm perfectly fine.”

“That’s ‘cause you’re so hot.” you replied with a wink. That was better, now you were starting to find your groove. 

The boy let out a small laugh beside you. “It’s the prosthetic, isn’t it? Girls love the look on Halloween.”

“Mike Meyers chic is very sexy.” you agreed. “Jason’s got nothing on you." 

"Except maybe a foot and a half.” he admitted. 

“Speaking of Halloween.” You said, bracing yourself. “There’s a fall festival coming up this weekend. Actually it’s been going on since last weekend but it’s still happening this weekend.” Shit, you were starting to ramble a bit. You took a deep breath to keep your cool. 

“Yeah? That sounds like it could be fun.”

You stopped walking and turned to him and gave him your trademark smirk to hide your nerves. “Then go on a date with me tomorrow. I’d love to go with you." 

The two seconds it took for Sal to answer felt like an eternity. Everything seemed to slow down as he stopped walking and glanced up at you. 

"Uh, sure!” He replied and you could hear it in his voice that he was smiling at you. Your heart seemed to stop for a moment at his words, and for a second you almost faltered and looked surprised. 

“Awesome!” you replied. “Okay, so meet me at 1 in front of the apartments, mk? I’m gonna show you a great time!" 

…

BlankFace: HE SAID YES! 

You texted Ashley excitedly. You managed to keep calm and collected until you made your way back home, but you immediately jumped on the bed and started giggling like mad. After all that planning, you had not only managed to ask out your crush, but you had managed to plan an amazing date as well. 

AshleyFace: Aww, that’s great! I hope you two have fun!

BlankFace: And also get this, Larry said that he thinks I’m pretty apperenly??

AshleyFace: Well yeah, you are. 

BlankFace: Well I know that but I didn’t think Sal did! 

You couldn’t stop smiling to yourself. In less than 24 hours you’d be on your first date with Sally Face. With Ashley’s help, you had already picked out what you were going to wear and how you were gonna do your make up. In fact, you didn’t really have anything to do except wait. You sat up and grabbed your laptop again, pulling up the page for the festival for the hundredth time. Yup, it was still the same schedule, no changes in the weather reports, and no cancellations. 

You kinda regretted being too prepared. 

Behind you, your phone buzzed, and buzzed…. and buzzed. Your group chat seemed to be exploding. 

SallyFace changed the group name to Scooby Doo Minus the Dog

LarryFace changed the group name to Scooby Doo but Good

BlankFace: You take that back, Larry. Scooby Doo is the shit. 

BlankFace changed the group name to Scooby Doo Appreciation Fan Club

SallyFace changed the name of the group to No Dogs Allowed

LarryFace: Oops. 

BlankFace. oh shit sorry dude

SallyFace: It’s okay!

LarryFace changed the name of the group to The Putting Your Foot In Your Mouth Club

AshleyFace changed the name of the group to Bologna Fan Club

Everyone in the group chat is typing…

Next Chapter

#sal fisher x reader #sally face x reader #sally face #nacht post #nacht fic #cant be unseen #cbu

[jewpacabruhs]

also do the "wanna go out w me sometime" one for kyman thanks sis

nah thank you bb :-) ok im doin this one first to get the writin juices flowin heh

yay drag cartman…. lil bit inspired by lais fic ;)

When Kyle agreed to help Cartman break up Stan and Craig, South Park’s newest and strangest young couple, he hadn’t thought it would turn into a fiasco. Maybe he should’ve had the foresight to anticipate Cartman’s antics, but as it was, when Cartman had bitched about Craig and Tweek being soulmates and Craig being an entire idiot for dumping him, and Kyle had agreed that Stan deserved better than being a rebound for some aloof alternative space nerd like Craig, and Cartman had proposed they break them up, Kyle had immediately accepted without much thought. Cartman was good at schemes like that; surely he could find a way to split them easily enough. 

Kyle was an idiot for that, because Cartman could never do things “easily enough” - he just had to turn a simple little mission into a completely over-the-top and often disastrous performance, with unnecessarily extravagant costumes and everything.

So that’s how he ended up in a booth in the nicest restaurant in town, wearing his finest suit, which he hasn’t touched since his cousin Eli’s bar mitzvah last May. Thankfully it still fits, though it’s a little restrictive. Across from him is one Eric Cartman who is, of course, inexplicably in drag; a floor length deep blue evening dress, sparkly silver makeup, and a sleek blonde wig. He looks amazing, and Kyle resents him for it.

“We’ll be noticed less if we look like your average straight couple,” Cartman had explained, when Kyle had picked him up from his house and given him a look of barely contained annoyance and contempt. Then he’d said, “Oh, this almost feels like prom!” and tried to get Kyle to escort him to the car, and eventually got his way by saying, “If this is how you treat women, I can see why none of them wanna date you.” Kyle had grudgingly linked arms with him after that, and walked him down to the car - even opened the door for him, though Cartman didn’t even really need help; he could walk perfectly fine in his heels, he just liked to be irritating.

So now they’re in the booth, and Kyle’s leg won’t stop bouncing. Craig and Stan are two tables away, both wearing suits and looking like they’re playing dress up. Stan’s blabbing enthusiastically about something, and Craig looks a little bored, but he’s nodding along, prodding at a salad. Cartman had anonymously left a free reservation - how he’d acquired it, Kyle was scared to ask - in Stan’s mail box: “Congratulations! This is a ticket to a free dinner for two on Saturday September 7th, at 8 PM at our fine eatery!” as well as some finer print details, including the lie that it’d been won from a randomized lottery. It’d been addressed to Stan himself, because Cartman figured Randy might try to steal it for him and Sharon. Stan had gushed about it at school, about how he wanted to treat his mom to dinner as a late birthday present, and while Kyle thought that was immensely sweet of him and felt pretty bad about it, he’d had to dissuade him from taking her. “It’s a romantic type of place,” he’d said, feeling like a real shitty friend. “People are gonna think-” and then Kenny had helpfully pitched in, “-that your mom’s a cougar, bro!” That was all it took for Stan to decide he’d take someone else, and from there, Kyle had gently planted the idea that Stan should take his new boyfriend. 

So there they were, at a table for two.

“Dark and dark don’t go together,” Cartman’s saying, frowning disapprovingly. He keeps eyeing the bread sticks, but he hasn’t touched them, probably for fear of messing his lipstick up. “Craig needs Tweek, for, like, contrast, you know? Blonde and black. It works. You can’t have two yangs.”

“The yin is the black one,” Kyle says boredly, just to correct him, though he doesn’t know for sure. “What about Token and Nichole?”

“That’s different.” Cartman waves a hand. “Craig and Stan - have you heard that thing about white gays, uh, dating their own lookalikes? That’s - yeah, that’s Craig and Stan.”

“They don’t look alike,” Kyle frowns. “Craig’s all angular and, like, lithe, or whatever, and Stan’s kinda softer and - and wider, like. He’s sturdy. Different body types, dude. Their faces are super different, too.”

“You sound gay as fuck right now, and I’m the one in drag.”

“Shut the hell up, Cartman. You didn’t have to be in drag, that was all you.”

Cartman quirks an arched brow at Kyle - if the redhead knew anything about makeup, he’d know that Cartman had glued his own eyebrows down, put foundation over them, and redrawn higher arches to achieve the alluring look he wanted; he’d learned a lot from all his hours of watching Drag Race. Kyle, however, is ignorant as hell, so he’s dumbfounded as to how Cartman pulled the look off, but incredibly irritated by how it’s impressive and almost endearing to him, that Cartman’s so good at passing as a girl. He’s a pretty one, too, all soft angles and gentle curves, his naturally pouty lips even poutier with the help of overdrawn lip liner and the pale pink of the lipstick he’s got on.

“I like being pretty,” Cartman explains simply, and Kyle scowls at him because of course he knows how good he looks. Smug bastard.

Kyle’s facing away from Craig and Stan’s table, because Cartman doesn’t look anything like himself from far away, but Kyle’s not wearing anything to disguise himself, other than the uncharacteristic suit; he’d be instantly recognizable if they saw his face, so he can’t risk it. So though he occasionally risks glances back, he’s mostly watching Cartman watch them, as he pretends to look at his menu - and no, Kyle’s not grateful for the excuse to stare at Cartman. He’s getting more and more anxious the longer he looks at him, because he looks like a very pretty girl and it’s confusing Kyle indefinitely. It’s still Cartman, he tells himself firmly. 

He’s so busy convincing himself that he absolutely can’t find Cartman attractive, that he almost misses the panic in his eyes. 

“What?” Kyle asks, starting to turn, but Cartman reaches out and grabs him, press-on red nails digging into Kyle’s forearm.

“They’re walking over here!”

“Fuck!”

“Quick, kiss me!” 

“What? No!”

“They’ll recognize us from this close, Kahl!”

Kyle wants to argue, wants to come up with an alternative, anything but pressing his lips to Cartman’s, but they’re getting closer and he doesn’t have time - he grabs Cartman’s wrist and pulls him closer, tilting his head to the side and kissing him as chastely as he can - he refuses to let this be remotely passionate. The softly curly bangs of Cartman’s wig fall over both their faces, which is good; it’ll hide them. 

Kyle tries to count in his head - ten seconds, he thinks, that should be good, they’ll be gone by then and I can pull away - but he gets to three before he becomes hyper-aware of the way Cartman’s lips feel against his own. He doesn’t want to think too hard about it, he really doesn’t, but it’s hard to ignore the glossy feel, how he smells faintly of strawberries, how his lips are warm and plush, just like the few girls Kyle’s been lucky enough to kiss. But this isn’t a girl, this is Cartman - and yet, somehow, when it’s been far longer than ten seconds, Kyle can’t bring himself to pull away. Part of him, the pre-installed horny teen that sits in the back of his mind and yells at him constantly for being more focused on school than getting laid, wants to deepen the kiss, wants to move closer to Cartman, who’s overwhelmingly soft and warm and pretty - but then someone clears their throat and Kyle pulls away, wide-eyed and disoriented.

It’s Kenny, and he’s grinning like a mad man. “Oh man,” he says merrily. “Oh man! Fuckin’ incredible!”

Kyle wants to ask what the hell Kenny is doing at a fancy place like this, but the waiter outfit he’s wearing answers his unspoken question. “Don’t tell anyone,” he says instead, quietly, glaring hard so Kenny knows he means business.

Kenny grins at him cryptically, winks at Cartman, then walks away with a joyous spring in his step.

“You’re a bastard,” Kyle says to Cartman, who looks, for once in his life, genuinely at a loss for words. “Kenny’s gonna tell everybody, and every kid in school will know you and I kissed - hell, it won’t take long for our parents to find out! Everyone will think I’m gay, and they’re gonna think I’m gay with you of all fucking people - you know how pissed my mom is gonna be? Not ‘cause I’m gay, and I’m not! I - I don’t even know what I am, but now people are gonna assume I am, and I won’t even get to have that to myself - fuck, my mom’s gonna be pissed because it’s you. Of all the eligible bastards, she’ll think I wanted you.”

Cartman’s looking at him with a strange mix of confusion and something akin to desire, freaky as that is. “You, uh - okay, bad timing, but do you wanna go out sometime?”

Kyle raises his eyebrows at him. “Are you fucking insane?”

“For you, babe, probably,” Cartman says smoothly. He pushes a curl of hair out of his face and bites his lip, trying for seductive, and Kyle’s genuinely angry that he has some irritating horrible terrible absolutely and completely subconscious desire to kiss him again. 

Kyle looks away before he can get more upset. “We didn’t split up Stan and Craig, and now Kenny thinks we’re dating. This night couldn’t have gone any worse, and it’s all your fault. Why do you have to do things so outlandishly? We could’ve done literally anything else to get them to break up. But no, you just had to trick me into going on a date with you-” Then it dawns on Kyle, that that’s what this was all about in the first place. Craig and Stan were an afterthought; Cartman wanted an excuse to be with Kyle.

Cartman seems to realize that Kyle’s figured this out, because he has the nerve to look embarrassed. “It was perfect, Kahl,” he says quietly. “How was I supposed to pass up an opportunity like this?”

Kyle feels a rush of different and harshly conflicting emotions - irritation, a flash of hatred, betrayal, irritation again, anger, then something like desire, and passion, and that damn urge to kiss him again.

He squeezes his eyes shut and takes a few deep breaths. Then he stands up quickly and says, “Let’s go. We’re leaving.”

“Wait, now that my lipstick’s already smudged, I want some bread sticks-”

“Let’s go,” Kyle repeats, tugging on Cartman’s arm.

Cartman lets Kyle pull him to his feet, briefly rocking back and forth in his off brand Louie V heels. Now devoid of a reason to hide his crush on Kyle, he smiles happily and says, “You’re lucky I like it rough. Any other girl might slap you for being so rude.”

“You’re not a girl.” Kyle throws a tip down on the table, despite not having ate, and starts pulling Cartman toward the exit. He doesn’t know where Stan and Craig went, or even why they left, but he’s not thinking about them right now.

“No, I’m not, and that scares you, doesn’t it? Poor widdle baby Kahl, having his first gay panic-”

Kyle turns on him and bares his teeth, ignoring the fact that they’re being stared at. “I would shut the fuck up if I were you,” he growls, without thinking about it, but immediately regrets it when Cartman’s eyes go half-lidded. He can handle homoerotic overtones with a rival - but not with someone who so clearly is into him and who, terrifyingly, Kyle’s admittedly hot for himself.

Cartman goes silent, though, blissfully, as Kyle leads them out of the restaurant. 

Once they’re outside, where it’s fairly empty other than an extended family in the parking lot saying their goodbyes, Kyle turns on Cartman. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Cartman grins at him. He looks like the cat that got the cream - and he looks like that a lot, he’s a smug asshole who gets his way far more often than he deserves to, but this time, things are different, and worse yet, this time, Kyle wants to kiss that self-satisfied smile right off his stupid face. 

But that’s what Cartman wants, and Kyle won’t let him have it. 

So instead, he says, “Are you free this Friday?”

Cartman smiles. 

#kyman #my writing #answered #steidiz #this... is inspired by a family guy scene #do i care? no. we're passed that #also yay me i wrote a kiss!!! #i missed writing kyman this was fun yayyy

[one-1-year-gone]

day thirty-one (31)

Wohoo, one (1)  month. Already one (1) tenth (10th) done. And I wouldn’t have said time has flown. It kinda feels like I’ve been here so long and on the other side it feels like I still have no clue what’s going on. Bc I don’t. But I think I might have formed some friendships in school. Just gotta transport them outside out of school. I’ll get there. Still got nine (9) months, haha.

We had another assembly this morning. This time a year assembly, so all the people from the same year. They were talking about committees and stuff and then prom. I had not known about this. It costs about sixty-ish (60) pounds and you’ll have to pay a deposit until the end of September. And I’m so gonna go there. I have no clue when I’m heading home, but I will go to that f’cking prom. Like I kinda hate this school with all these children and their maze-like corridors, but no one is going to stop me dressing up for any occasion.

Today was an okay-ish day. It was raining in the morning, but in the afternoon it actually got warm. I had to take off my jumper, the sun shone outside. A nice autumn afternoon. After school I didn’t go to the gym, I had to go to Maths supported study, bc our teacher kinda scared me into it, bc we’re starting a new topic tomorrow and this is based on Indices. And bc I had no idea what indices are, I went. Wasted time. I knew it. Like there was one thing that I wasn’t aware of. Aaanyway.

Tomorrow is Wednesday and Wednesday is a good day, bc I have two (2) frees before lunch, which means I can go home. And isn’t that great.

I try to make the blogs more interesting, but unfortunately there was no fire alarm today. I hung with Lucie nearly all day, that was chill. Micheal showed me where the McDonalds is, in case I would fancy getting it, if I had time. I chatted with him over lunch and found out that he is also a coeliac. I don’t know why but now I know four (4) coeliacs (Micheal, Claudia, Vivaine, this one Italian dude), which is astounding, bc before I went to Scotland I knew zero (0).

Yeah I try to stay relevant.

Literally the only word I bothered to write down from today:

Gâté= spoiled

#scotland #scotia #scottish #edinburgh #midlothian #exchange #exchange year #exchange student #year abroad #host student #travel blog #travel #daily blog

[sunshinechii-scenarios]

Sunset Ride

✿ Nct’s Renjun x Female!Reader ✿ Fluff ✿ 1.6k words ✿ Not requested ✿ Written by Chii ✿ Masterlist!

I’ve felt like I’m experiencing my first crush again whenever I look at Renjun and I’m so head over heels for him,,,help,,,,not a college au but everyone ‘00 line and up is preparing to start college. I might have to explain that college, for me, starts at the end of August and high school starts at the beginning of September. The legal age to drive where I am is 16 but most people start driving around 17 or 18.  I WAS GONNA QUEUE THIS BUT UH MY ONLY SPOT OPEN IS AT THE END OF NOVEMBER AND I WANTED TO POST THIS. 

I made the following divider so please don’t take it or use in your own posts, thank you .- Chii 

         It was the last day of summer. People were preparing to go back to school. Supplies stores bustled with parents and their kids as they try to purchase everything on the lists the teachers handed out the last day of school the previous year. Mall lines long with customers buying new clothes. This was the last bit of teenage summer you and the other 00 liners would have before you started college. You knew things would change and it made your heart ache every time you thought about it. Some of them were leaving for school and some were staying. You, Jaemin and Haechan were staying for college. Mark, Jeno and Renjun were leaving. It broke your heart to be separated from them, especially Renjun. For the longest time, the both of you have been aware of each other's feelings but never did anything about it. You didn’t know if you would survive without his laughter that rang like the clearest bells or smile that made you feel like nothing else mattered. You two found yourselves spending more and more time together as the summer neared its end. Late nights talking about anything, sleepovers where you two would watch movies too scary for the both of you, going to Mark and Jaemin’s birthday parties and being practically attached at the hips. You were going to miss him.

         You were in the middle of packing your backpack for your first class tomorrow. You sat on the floor and went through your list of books required while listening to Mark’s playlist he made for everyone. You made sure your pencil case had pens and pencils. Your phone stopped playing music and your ringtone rang instead. Your phone lit up and you saw Renjun's name pop up across the screen. You accepted the call and held the phone up to your ear. There was no greeting just giggling.

“Hey, look outside your window!” You got up from your seat on the floor and saw Jeno’s car in the street. The same beat up car Jeno used to back up into your fence, the same car he used to drive everyone to prom, the same car that held so many endless memories. Jeno mentioned a while ago that he would be getting rid of it soon and buy the car he’s been eyeing, he finally saved enough for it. You saw that Jaemin was in the passenger seat, waving to you from the rolled down window. Haechan did the same he called your name. Renjun was up through the open sunroof with the phone pressed against his cheek as he used both arms to wave to you.

“What are you guys doing here?” You asked as you stared at Renjun from your window. His face broke out in a large smile as he replied.

“We’re spending the last bit of summer we have left, diner food and then we’re going down to the beach. Join us?” His voice sounded hopeful but he knew well enough that you would agree. Renjun saw your face mirror his smile and spoke into the phone before going back down into the car.

“We’ll see you soon,” he said before he hung up. You quickly changed out of your lounge clothes and into a big tee-shirt and a pair of jean shorts. You looped a belt around your waist and tucked the shirt in before pulling some of it out. You picked out a pair of mismatched socks, grabbed your phone and your wallet. You texted your mom that you would be out and be home by the time she came home from her nightshift. You opened the door and waved to the boys while you laced your shoelaces. Renjun got out of the car as you locked your door. He happily hugged you and kept his arms around your shoulders from behind as you two walked to the car. You saw the sunlight reflect in Jaemin’s eyes as he greeted you. Haechan yelled for Renjun to get off of you so he could give you a hug. He constantly jokes about how Renjun stole you from him. You recalled being sat next to Haechan in your 3rd period math class during your first year in high school.

         “The middle seat is the worse. I can’t believe you’re making me sit here,” you said as you sat next to Haechan. He pulled out his phone to take a quick picture of you and him to put up on his social media.

You smiled at the camera while Jeno looked at you from the mirror, you could see his eyes smile, “who told you to live the farthest?”

“Oh just drive,” you giggled out as you wrapped the seatbelt across your body. Renjun got back into the car and strapped in also. Jeno started to drive, Jaemin turned around to look at you.

“Any music requests?” He waved his phone and saw it open on a screen full of songs. Haechan immediately went off to listing songs to Jaemin all of which were in Mark’s playlist.

         It took 15 minutes to get to the diner. Everyone filed out quickly and through the doors. Renjun instinctively slung an arm around your shoulders as you two walked. A waiter happily greeted you all as he walked everyone over to the largest booth they had. It was tucked in the corner of the diner and you remember sitting there during your days of high school.

         Everyone ordered things like fries, burgers and milkshakes. When it came for you to order, Renjun recites your order like he’s reading off a page. When the waiter leaves, you nudge him.

“What if I wanted the vanilla milkshake today?” you asked him as you and Jaemin looked at the desserts page.

“You cringed at it when Haechan offered you some last time we were here.” You looked up at him and rolled your eyes before sending him a smile.

“Get a room!” Jeno said as he throws a straw wrapper at you two.

         Being in a diner with the rest of the boys felt like time stopped. Sitting next to the people you grew up with. You looked over to them. Jaemin was laughing at something Renjun said, a straw in between his teeth as his lips spread. Jeno and Haechan were singing along to the music being played. You wanted time to stop in that moment. The world had to move though and the only indicator of time was how the sun started to fall.

“Last fry?” Renjun waved a fry in front of your face. You went forward but he quickly put it in his mouth.

“Loser,” you said as threw a napkin at him.

“Should we start heading to the beach?” Haechan said just before he guided himself to his straw. Everyone took a look outside and saw the sun falling.

         Everyone paid their part and filed back to the car. Another 15 minutes and Jeno pulled into a parking spot that was right in front of the beach. He didn’t even bother to turn off the engine, he ran out with Jaemin and Haechan. The radio was still playing music. You stepped out and embraced the slight heat of the sun on your face. You breathed in the salty sea and sighed happily. Renjun smiled at you unknowingly. His hand came up to push his hair back, it fell back in place with the slight look of messiness. He suddenly crawled back into the car and opened the sunroof. He pulled himself up and sat on the roof.

“Come up here,” he said. You walked over and grabbed his outstretched hand. He held you steady as you sat on the roof.

         Here you were, sitting on the roof of Jeno’s car. Everyone else with their toes in the sand or in the waters. You looked past your friends and to the sky. Renjun admired your gaze at the sky, he found the colorful horizon in your eyes as you looked it. Just then a breeze came from the sea and he saw you compact your legs into your chest.

“Here, it’s kind of breezy right now,” he took off the denim jacket he had on and slung it over your shoulders. You smiled shyly as the cuffed sleeves fell down your shoulders. He had on just a white tee-shirt, his dark jeans and a pair of beaten up sneakers. You admired his profile as he stared out to the setting sun. The sky was transitioning from blue to purple to a bright orange. It looked like a piece of artwork behind Renjun.

You sneaked your hand closer to his and he let you weave your fingers together. You let out a content sigh and let your head rest on his shoulder, he lightly presses a kiss on top of your head. You felt the smile that played across his lips as he did. This string of romantic action didn’t go unnoticed by the others.

“Love birds!” Jaemin shouted from the water. You and Renjun say nothing but smile widely. The others coo at you two.

“I love you,” you heard his soft voice play the most beautiful notes that no instrument could compare. You felt his gaze on you. You turned your head and smiled. His dark chocolate brown eyes felt so warm. You felt like you were at home with him. His fingers laced themselves deeper with yours. In that moment, you wanted to cry. You didn’t want summer to end. You didn’t want this moment to end. You really wondered how life was before you met Renjun and fell in love with the boy. He made you feel like life was so much more than it’s perceived to be. You wanted to let him know that.

“I love you too.”

I’m so in love with Huang Renjun. He really is like my sun and stars. I’m so sad omg I needed to write something. He’s making me feel like I can love all over again. I’ve never mentioned this but something happened to me and I’ve been hesitant to I crush on people again. Would it be weird to admit that I have a crush on Renjun? :((( lol im so pitiful y’all I’ve also been having sessions where I just have real bad thoughts and I would think back to last year when I was in HS and ugh IM GONNA GO I LOVE YOU ALL A LOT TT- Chii

Please don’t claim this as your own and please don’t do anything with it without my permission. If you don’t want it happening to you, don’t do it to others.

#i love renjun lol #help me please #nct #Nct scenario #nct imagine #nct dream scenario #nct dream imagine #nct dream fluff #renjun scenario #renjun imagine #renjun fluff #nct dream #nct u #nct 127 #nct 2018 imagines #nct 2018 scenarios #nct 2018 fluff

[blurrybethny]

Diary entry #8

So I’m gonna start this entry the same way I did in the last post.

So. MUCH. has. happened. like so much

okey, so since the last post, it’s almost been 2 years. Isn’t that crazy, 2 years. Well, the main reason for that has been F. So let’s just start where we left of.

So we’re in May or something now, and I finally finished my finals and got my results which where incredibly great. So with that result I had the chance to apply to the University of my dreams for the major Online-Media-Management. I thought that it would be great to make Instagram and Facebook to your Job. So meanwhile, I was still hanging out with F everyday, and since I already finished my finals, F was allowed to sleep at my place. 

Now we are at the end of June and it is my high school prom which I have been exited about, I had a beautiful long, blue dress and F was wearing a really handsome suit. The funny thing was the next morning at 6am we had to catch out flight to Tenerife. So F was drinking kind of a bit of alcohol at my prom and at like 1 or 2am we drove back to my place and slept for like an hour and then headed to the airport.

We’re in July now, for 10 days we had the greatest vacation ever. The whole time we did what we wanted, the explored the whole city with a scooter und took many pictures. On one of the days we went up to the biggest mountain of Tenerife and then WALKED down it. We were almost on the ground again, when we lost track of the path and kinda got lost. But at the end we came back home safely. On another day we drove to this cool looking beach, it was really windy tho and the sand was hurting so much when it hit you skin. On one of the last days we drove to an animal park, which was also a great experience.

Just 2 weeks later, me and my mom flew to Los Angeles for kind of a road trip with a bigger group of tourists. The trip was really great because we explored LA, Hollywood, Las Vegas, San Francisco and other nice towns and sights. That was really one of my biggest dreams to travel through a part of the US. Honestly, at the beginning of the trip I missed F so much, and we talked everyday on the phone. I also was getting really angry at him, because at the beginning he seemed like he didn’t miss me at all and he went to two parties where he was having fun and getting drunk. And I also got quite jealous, because I was scared he would make a mistake with another girl. 

So we’re in August now, and I came back home from the US trip and F and my dad picked us up from the air port and I was so excited so see him again. Also btw during the trip I got the message that they accepted me at the university I wanted to go to. So I was really happy about that. And because of that, now it was the time to search for a flat near the university, because it is actually 300km away from my hometown. The question that was upcoming now was, if F would move with me or not. And he said to me that he would move to anywhere I was. Which was really sweet of him and I was so happy about that. Now we had to search for a flat with at least 2 rooms. The search was kinda difficult because the flats where really expensive up there and especially in the middle of the city. However, my mom finally found one that was having a visitors day, so we drove up to the city and visited the flat. The flat already had furniture in it and it was not the prettiest. After that we kind of spontaneously drove to another flat that was also having a visitor day the same day, but there were no pictures on the internet. So we got there and the landlord was really nice, the little town was pretty and quiet and the flat was light and had no furniture in it. So we drove back home and the same day, the landlord from the first flat denied our request. However, the one from the second flat, sent my mom an email the next day, that the flat was ours!! So the renovating began. We drove up there on the weekends again to paint the walls and buy furniture. It was a lot of fun.

September. Not a lot happened in September, at least I can’t remember it. The only thing was, that it was my 19th birthday and I really wanted to go to a club, so we went to the club. I was wearing a really sexy dress obviously. Then we only stayed until 1am and left again because it was kinda boring and I felt a little sick. So, surprise surprise, on my birthday I was sick. 

October. At the beginning of October, a week before Uni officially started my major had a kick-off to get to know the other students and teachers. I was really confident in myself and ambitious to meet new people and hopefully make some friends. The first day, started not that bad, I picked up 3 other girls to drive to the meeting place. There I got to know other girls as well. I actually talked with almost everybody - which is not common for me - and still groups were already forming and I was left behind. I kind of thought that I was getting closer to some girls, but they always left and did other stuff and I’m just not the type of girl to run after everybody. So even there I was sitting alone sometime. And I was turning into an outsider more and more because me and another girl were the only ones not drinking. It was also annoying for me because they played all kinds of drinking games and that’s just not my thing. The next day was not so great because I just felt uncomfortable and left out. The evening was even worse, I felt even more left out, and I felt so sad because I missed F so much and I just wanted to be home. I was really glad when the 3 days were over. Overall, the start of the major was not bad, I kind of liked the subjects - however, I was still the odd one out all the time, because everybody already had a friends group and everybody is just shallow - I also started to get better friends with the other girl that was not drinking alcohol and we actually had quite a few things in common. I even invited her for a sleepover once and we initially wanted to watch Riverdale but we ended up talking about all kinds of stuff. Since then she is like the only one I really talk to. 

The following months until February were not really exciting. It was a really hard time for me because during the week I was all alone in my flat and I only saw F on the weekends and holidays. I literally cried every time we had to say goodbye. Also during that time, we had a lot of fights because when we talked over video call he usually fell a sleep which made me angry. And also when we saw each other on the weekends, he still had stuff to do or met up with people or even had to work Saturday and Sunday. This things always made me really angry and frustrated because I was all alone the whole time, I just wanted to spend time with him on the weekends and then he would have even less time. Sometimes we had really heavy fights where he really hurt me with his words. I know that I was not always fair to him and how I reacted, but he also never understood me. What I maybe have to add here is that, since F this one fight between me, S and F after the theatre the friendship between the two guys and between me and S was kind of over. So in August F told me that S was diagnosed with cancer. In the following months F and S started to talk again and meet up, which I was happy about because they have been friends for a long time and I felt really guilty that I was the reason for the breakup of this friendship. Also for new years eve we planned a bigger party because S wanted it to. It was not too bad, and I was really glad about the fact that S was talking to me again, because I missed being friends with him. In the following months there were ups and downs with his health.

February. Most of this month F and me spent in Thailand because his mom is from Thailand. However, this vacation was probably the worst one I have ever had. First, everything was just new to me and I met a lot of new people I could not talk to because they only spoke Thai, then another thing was that F did not really keep me in mind because this was his second home and everything was just normal for him but not for me. Especially the missing hygiene and the weird food. Also I got pretty sick with fever and everything and I had to go to the hospital for two days. After that I still stayed home a bit and F always wanted to go fishing at night. And I was just so frustrated about him because I was still exhausted from the sickness and he did not really pay attention to me and always got angry at me because I didn’t want to leave the house and I always started crying. So I basically did not leave the house for two days, when we finally got together again. The last few days were the best of the whole holiday because he finally adapted his actions to my needs. 

March. F finally moved in with me because his education for his job finally ended, so he had to find a job up here. It took quite a while but he finally found a job which he likes. Also I got the results of my first semester’s tests and they were all really great actually. 

April. We finally had our one year anniversary for which we went out on a date.

May. F, me and his family drove to Hungary for a weekend trip which was also okey. But I prefer the alone time between F and me. In Uni, I finally started to become kind of friends with two other girls, and we also formed a group for a school project, however, one of the girls quite uni during that.

June. This is the month of S’s death day. I was so sorry for F, because they were finally best friends again and it seemed to get better. I was also in shock because I just couldn’t image S not being here anymore, to never see him again. 

July. Not much happened in this month, except that I had my finals and I applied for a job that I could do over the summer break, and I actually got one in a cafe not far from my flat. Also the other girl I was talking about, that I thought I was also kinda getting friends with, switched to another major at the end of the semester. So again, I had no friends.

August. I worked the whole month in this cafe, and it was actually so much fun, because I did not have to think about school and it was just something different for me. Also my coworkers were really nice and funny.

September. I had my last week to work, and everybody was telling me how much they would miss me and that I was the best worker here for the summer and why I can't stay, and honestly this makes me so proud, because I never thought I would be so good in this job. After the last week in work, F and me drove to Hungary again because we wanted to have some vacation and also work on the house his parents have there. After we got back home, F and his friend B planned a kind of funeral for S, because since his death there has not been a funeral. The “party” was really nice and emotionally. For me it was really hard because until then I always tried to ignore my thoughts and feelings about this topic because I had to be strong for F. But at this day everything was just coming up. A few days later we drove back to our flat.

October. The 3rd semester of my university was starting. After only the first week, I knew there was a lot a head of me. - short cut, because I have to tell a backstory to what's following, so I’ve always wanted a dog since I have been a kid and F also always wanted a dog, for the past year I was pretty obsessed with pugs, then I was obsessed with french bulldogs because they’re just cute. Back in January we already talked about this topic with my mom and she just said that me and F have not been together for so long and that we would talk about this another time. So until October we were kinda over this topic already.- But on one day where we both were home, he brought the topic back up and just for information purposes he searched for people, that were selling french bulldog puppies. On the same day, we were driving to there place - keep in mind we just wanted to ask them how much space the puppies would need, how much affection and just general stuff. - But oh my god, the puppies were so cute and adorable. When they said the dogs only need around 50-60 square meters, I was initially in the mode of picking my favorite puppy (our flat has 56 square meters). On the way home we both knew that we would be getting a dog. When we drove home, F called our landlord and asked him, if it would be okey if we would get a dog and I called my mom to tell her all the facts, because against that she would not be able to say something against it.  She was not impressed but also not angry, so I was like okey let’s get a dog. The next day, we drove to the breeders again to pick our puppy. I originally said that I would either want a grey or spotted one - they had both - however, the spotted ones were not that pretty. So we had to make the decision between a lazy fat black one or a quirky playful grey one. Characteristically, we would more be like the black one, but I wanted to have the grey one so we could play a lot. So there you have it, within two days, we made the decision to get a dog and already picked out a puppy. Four weeks later, we would be able to pick him up.

November. The time has finally come, and we were able to pick up our puppy and bring him home. He was really, great. He was not scared of anything and he was also not crying a lot. It was so funny to watch him run around and play and jump. Back then he was so little, you can't even imagine. But he’s also a lot of work, at the beginning he peed and pooped into the flat which was not so great. Another topic: Uni. During October and November I did not have the best time in uni, because there were so many things I did not understand and I was exhausted and it was just so much that I was not even interested in. I was so stressed out, I had a break down almost everyday because of the tasks we had to do. I was also considering, switching to another major that was about marketing and advertisement. Because I was way more interested in that kind of stuff. However, the problem was the timing, because the semester had just started, so I either had to finish this semester anyways or I would stop right now and then do nothing until March, which my mom would not allow. And if it was the first option, I would already been done with 3 Semesters, and if I would switch to another major I would have to start at zero again. I also saw, that the major I wanted to switch to had really shity times to be at uni, and with our puppy it was better if I was the most time at home. So it was a really shit time for me, because I wanted to switch but then I would be even longer in Uni. But also a reason, why I wanted to switch was that in my major I did not really have any friends and I was just hoping that I would maybe gain some new friends in the other major. So it was the first weekend that we drove home with the puppy because also my grandpa had died and the funeral was on a Friday. When we got home I noticed that my mom was annoyed the whole time. - my dad was in love with the puppy tho - so the funeral was pretty sad and I could not believe that my grandpa was gone now. It was for the better tho, because his health got worse, sometimes he would not even remember me and his body was just shutting down. At the funeral I also had to think of S, and that I lost two people this year. The day after, me and my parents talked about a lot of things. First, me and my dad about the houses and some stuff and that I would get one of the houses. And then all together about why my mom was so angry about the dog and yea. Then I told her the situation about the decision I would want to make considering the major and obviously she was not happy about it. Like she's paying my rent and everything. So her condition was that, if I would switch, I would have to find a mini-job during the semester. So that was not really optional because I would have to do so much for uni itself. So I got over the idea and said to myself that I just have to live through it. 

December. I’m still here in my original major and I finally found peace with it because now I’m almost done with everything and the things don’t seem impossible anymore. But I’m really glad that this semester is over soon, because I hate everything about it. I also feel really uncomfortable in the lessons again, because I always sit next to the girl - from the very beginning I’m still friends with her - but she always wants to sit in the front which means that it is always just me and her in the front and everybody else is always behind us. Which I feel so uncomfortable about. It is also always really awkward when we have to build groups of 4 or something because then it always us two outsiders and usually two other outsiders. - Just so you know, I have nothing against foreign people, like my boyfriend is half Thai - but these other two outsiders are from russia I think, and they have this strong accent and because I already worked together with them and I sit with them, I think I am also considered an outsider and I feel so uncomfortable with that. Also another thing that’s been on my mind lately is, that the relationship between me and F is getting quite dry and boring because we just have our routine and there is nothing exciting anymore. It’s also really difficult to change this, because our routines are fixed because of work and uni but also because every time I talked with F about our relationship and that I want more love and affection, he does it for like two days and then it’s just like how it was before that. And this is so frustrating. I just want the feelings from the start again, where everything was exciting and new. Like he is still my favorite person and I prefer spending time with him over being alone or with someone else, but this is probably the problem why it is so boring. I just need a friend or an activity without him, so when I come back I’m excited to see him. Or we need a new routine, I just don’t know honestly. Last but not least, on Saturday we are finally driving home for the christmas break which I’m excited for because I don’t have uni for two weeks and yea. Also we maybe celebrate New Years Eve at my place which is also exciting, because I never really had a party at my place. Also another thing, in February and March next year I will be working at the coffee shop again which I am very excited for. I am also really excited for the next semester because then we will do a lot of marketing stuff and media production which I’m really interested in. - One last thing, last weekend F, two of his friends and I drove over 1000km on one day to look at a car F wanted to buy and guess what he bought it. But it is a crash car so he has to work on it still before he can drive it. Also our puppy is getting bigger and bigger and I am such a proud mommy.

- See you probably in 4 years

[orbemnews]

Covid forced too many parents to choose between work and helping their kids with remote classes. This CNN Hero is giving families the support to do both “We don’t want them to make the choice, me earning a living versus my child getting an education. What type of a choice is that?” said Jennifer Maddox, a 2017 CNN Hero and the founder of Future Ties, a non-profit after-school program on Chicago’s South Side. Since 2011, Maddox and her organization have provided mentoring, tutoring and a safe space for more than 100 children living in the Parkway Gardens Homes, a low-income apartment complex where a young Michelle Obama once lived. As a member of the Chicago Police Department for more than 20 years, Maddox observed first-hand the obstacles young people in struggling communities face. Parkway Gardens was one area that Maddox patrolled, and she was inspired to provide resources and a community space for children in the neighborhood. When the pandemic hit, Maddox knew she needed to temporarily re-tailor her program to fit the families’ needs during this uncharted time. “A lot of people lost their jobs and now they’re gradually starting to go back to work,” Maddox said. “Many of the parents we are supporting, they are actually leaving the home to go to work and can’t afford to stay at home to supervise their kids while they’re on remote learning.” So, last September, Maddox transformed her center into an e-learning hub where remote students receive the technology and support they need. “We were able to step in, like being a surrogate parent,” Maddox said. “We were there on-site for them so the kids didn’t have to travel far. They were familiar with us. It was a win-win for everybody.” Laptops and WiFi are provided for children who don’t have computers or dependable internet access. “We make sure they are online every morning, on time, making sure that they are in class, that they’re engaged, that we are supervising what they’re doing throughout the day,” Maddox said. Children also receive breakfast and lunch at the center. In addition, Maddox assembled an outreach team that provides necessities, support and referrals to the community. “We’re making sure that the services we provide are those wrap-around services that the family needs,” Maddox said. “Because we can’t make sure that your children are okay and you’re not okay. We have to make sure everybody in the house is on the same level playing field.” CNN’s Laura Klairmont spoke with Maddox about her current efforts. Below is an edited version of their conversation. CNN: During the pandemic, what were some of the issues facing the families you work with? Jennifer Maddox: Many of the families here was hit very hard with Covid. And it really just turned their lives and their households upside down because a lot of people lost their jobs at the onset. They had to figure out another way or another source of income to provide for their families. It wasn’t just the fear of catching Covid; it was the fear of, “What am I gonna do now?” When the city shut down, it shut them down. They had to figure out how they’re going to take care of themselves and their families. And now as they’re going back (to work), they’ll reach out to us and say, “I need somewhere for my son or my daughter to be safe, where they’re going to be supervised and able to get into class and do their work.” We know it’s a struggle. So, we’re available for them to bring their kids every day so that they can go to work. We want to be there for our parents because (they) are really out here trying. They’re so resilient. CNN: What types of support are you providing for the families through the outreach team? Maddox: In this community, we have so many shootings over here. It’s just unreal, the families are always coming into some type of trauma. They bounce back from everything. We give out resources to people so that the violence or the trauma that they may experience might not happen if they had access to places that could provide those opportunities for them. We also assist them how to fill out for unemployment, how to fill out a job application, or who was hiring, or support for substance abuse or domestic violence. We also help them sign up for the Covid shot. We offer them a time slot where they can go to the health clinic to get their shot. We want all of these supportive services to be like a one-stop shop. And that’s what we’re looking forward to in the future — getting a bigger space and putting everything under one roof so that the families have access to whatever it is that they need to support them. CNN: In what ways have the kids in your program been struggling through the pandemic? Maddox: It really took a toll on our young people. Kids do suffer from depression and they fell into a depressed state. You can actually see it in their faces every day when they come to the center, because it’s like, “Ugh, here we go again, behind this computer screen.” They’re losing the experience of what school is about. They missed out on proms and graduations and eighth grade trips and just different things that they look forward to. A lot of the student athletes, they’re looking to get scholarships based off of some sports they may play. And they’re looking at losing their whole season. I’ve had kids that have actually cried because they’re like, “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I don’t know if I’m going to go to college. I don’t know what’s next for me.” And that’s a problem. So, we make sure that our doors stayed open, that we were constantly involved and connected with not just the young people but specifically our teenagers because they were really struggling trying to cope through Covid. CNN: How are you helping the kids on a deeper level to get through this? Maddox: We’re providing hope and encouragement. Sometimes they just may need a listening ear. We make sure that they know that we are here for them. We want them to look forward to going back to school, to just getting back to the way they used to do things so they can come out of this depression and be able to function in a society that is not so closed off and limiting to them. If it’s anything that we can do to help them navigate through the challenges and struggles they are experiencing, we want them to reach out to us, to come talk to us, to let us know what hurts them and how we can help support them. We want to try to heal that hurt so they are not wounded when they continue to grow and move forward. Want to get involved? Check out the Future Ties website and see how to help. Source link Orbem News #Choose #Classes #CNN #Covid #families #forced #giving #helping #hero #Kids #parents #Remote #Support #Work

[st-crylo]

Rebound

Part 7

A/N: This chapter is shorter than I usually make my chapters, but I still think you guys will enjoy it! Thanks for being patient with me, next chapter comes out on Thursday night!

Warning: Swearing, mentions of manipulation

Word Count: 4.1K

Tagging: @nankstasty @haylaansmi @thomasscresswell

Masterlist

After your altercation with Rey, you guessed that she must have said something to everyone else, because no one even bothered to look at you, much less say anything to you. You didn’t show how much it actually bothered you, though, and apparently you were doing a good job at that as well, because no one had asked if you were alright. Of course, that could also be attributed to the fact that you decided not to disclose the information with Kylo, opting to share with Sami instead, who promised she wouldn’t say anything. 

A couple of weeks passed by, and the silence between yourself and your old group of friends was being filled by the laughter-ridden moments with your new friends. As the semester dragged on, August now seemingly fading into September, you were beginning to feel more and more at place with your new friends. 

You had also successfully continued your “relationship” with Kylo. There was no denying, in the eyes of the student body, that the two of you were certainly exclusive. Though the gossip surrounding you two had died down a bit, the ever approaching presence of homecoming was on the horizon, which brought to light a whole slew of questions. Were you and Kylo going? Were you going together? Most importantly, would Shawn go too?

You knew that Shawn was less than pleased by your new relationship, and it was becoming public knowledge throughout the student body. You’d even heard people in your math class betting on whether or not Kylo and Shawn would get into a fight any time soon, and who would throw the first punch. You liked to think that Kylo would be mature enough to not throw the first punch, but you also knew Shawn cared too much about his face to be the one to throw the first punch, so you weren’t so sure yourself. 

As you sat down, in the cafeteria today as it was too windy to sit outside, you let out a sigh as you pulled out your sandwich. Not even five minutes later, Kylo sat next to you, resting his arm on your shoulder as he got settled into his seat. 

“Can you believe all the hype about homecoming? I don’t think it’s that big of a deal, if I’m being honest,” Sami said from the other side of you, buried in her sketchbook, drawing a variety of flowers. 

“I think that part of your problem is that you won’t have anyone to go with this year,” Alan noted. Sami looked up at him with a frown before going back to her drawing.

“I’d rather take Milo to prom, rather than shitty homecoming,” Sami sneered as she etched into the paper. 

“I feel like homecoming is just a way to keep underclassmen from bitching about not being able to go to prom,” Kylo said, stealing the bag of chips you’d bought from the vending machine earlier. You playfully attempted to slap his hand away, but in the end, you let him take them. He removed his arm from your shoulders as he opened the bag of chips, leaving you feeling a little colder than you had been only seconds ago.

“I think you’re right there. Can you imagine the uproar if underclassmen didn’t get one semi-formal event?” Phasma said from the other side of Kylo. “So, were we planning to go this year, or?”

“Well, (y/n) and I must go,” Kylo said, acting as if it was his solemn duty to ask you to homecoming. “We do have a reputation to uphold afterall. Can’t be Mos Eisley’s most hated/loved couple if we don’t go.”

“Indeed. I would hate for everyone to miss out on my shitty attempts at dancing,” you joked, taking a bite from your sandwich. “Besides, gotta keep the rumor mills flowing. They seem to only find us interesting.”

“That is a little annoying, to be quite honest,” Kylo said, taking one of your napkins to wipe the chip dust from his face. “Tired of hearing people place bets about me. I’m almost tempted to take on the stance of the pacifist, that way no one makes their money.”

“That would only happen if Alvarez also decided to become a pacifist, my good bitch,” Sami said, closing her sketchbook and reaching for the clementine in front of her. 

“True, which, considering he’s just a meathead soccer player, I don’t think it’ll happen any time soon,” Kylo quipped, crumpling up the bag of chips and tossing it into the trash can right next to the table. “Regardless, I feel like he’d send one of his cronies to do his dirty work. I doubt he’d have the balls to punch me himself.”

“If he wasn’t a child, he would just get the fuck over it already,” you added. “We’ve been dating for, what, three weeks now? And he still can’t accept the fact that we’re dating.”

“He’s probably hoping you two will break up soon so he can move back in and prove he was right about Kylo,” Phasma added, leaning against the table. “Men like that always want to be right.” 

You nodded in agreement, thinking over Phasma’s words. You also wondered if Shawn just missed having someone to control. After all, he could have easily started dating the girl from the picture- though you doubted that would be very good for his reputation- so why did he still chase after you? Was the thought of you dating Kylo really that infuriating, or was he hoping that some part of you still wanted to bend to his will?

You shook your head of the thoughts and continued to eat your lunch. Though you were still looking to cause him as much agony as he’d caused you, you were trying not to think too hard about why Shawn acted the way he did. Maybe it was because thinking about him in general still caused you pain, after all it had only been a month after you found out he’d cheated on you, or maybe it was because thinking about him made you realize just how shitty he’d actually been to you. It made you think too much on why no one seemed to notice. 

When the bell rang that signified the end of lunch, you all stood from your spots at the table.

“We’ll see you guys in English,” Sami said as she and Phasma walked off in the opposite direction you and Kylo were going. Alan simply waved as he walked in the same direction as Sami and Phasma, leaving you and Kylo alone to walk to physics. 

“So, I am unable to hold my mother off any longer. She wants you to come to dinner, because apparently Gran told her how ‘unbelievably sweet’ you are,” Kylo said, rolling his eyes. “She wants to know if Saturday night is good for you.”

You smiled at the thought. You remembered Rey talking at length about how sweet of a woman Mrs. Solo is, and based on how Kylo talked about her, she wanted to be involved in Kylo’s life. 

“Of course Saturday is alright. The only problem is, I may have to tell my mom,” you responded. You had chosen to keep your “relationship” a secret from your mom, as she shared the opinions of most of the people in Mos Eisley in regards to Kylo and his behavior. In her eyes, Kylo was not a man fit for a committed relationship. There was also no way in hell you were telling her about the plan either. If you did, she’d probably flip more about that than if you simply told her you were dating Kylo.

“Are you sure you have to tell her now? I mean, I am kind of surprised she hasn’t heard about it already, but if she’s gonna be shitty about it, maybe it’s better to wait,” Kylo remarked as the two of you entered the physics room, heading over to your seats and lost in your conversation.

“I mean, she’s gonna know within the next few weeks if you plan to take me to homecoming,” you pointed out. This caused Kylo’s face to twist in thought as he sat down. 

“I guess that’s true. Will she let you go if she knows you’re going with me?” Kylo inquired.

“I don’t think so. I mean, she really wants me to ‘truly experience senior year.’ I doubt she’d keep me from going to my last homecoming,” you stated, pulling your notebooks from your backpack, flipping to the last page you made physics notes on. Mr. Windu walked into the class, carrying a stack of papers with him, moving to stand in front of the first row of tables.

“Alright class, here is your first study guide of the semester. The test will be on Friday, so I expect you all to be fully prepared, since I’m already giving you the study guide. If you complete the study guide and turn it in with your test, you’ll get bonus points based on how many questions you get right on the study guide,” he said as he grabbed a handful of packets and started sending them down the rows. 

You took notes throughout physics, occasionally sneaking a glance in Kylo’s direction as he doodled in his notebook. Letting out a small sigh, you wished you picked up physics as well as he did. As you continued to take notes, you felt your phone buzz in your pocket. As Mr. Windu looked towards the board, you sneaked a peek at your lockscreen to see what the notification was from. You were surprised to see a text from Poe. With a frown, you decided to shove your phone back into your pocket, and look towards the front of the class. 

Just like everyone else, Poe had been ignoring you, and you weren’t entirely sure you were ready to talk to him either. After all, he’d been shitty to you, why should you humor him? 

At the same time, a part of you did miss your old friends. It really felt like, after your row with Rey, that you’d been shunned by them for your choices. You understood that they didn’t understand your reasoning for anything going on, but you’d hoped that they would at least be respectful. Now, it felt like you were being punished for your decisions. Did you really want to open up a message that might make things worse? 

You tried to conceal your stress as you put your things away once Mr. Windu was done with the lecture. Kylo seemed to catch on, though, as he gave you a questioning look. You simply shook your head at him as you placed your backpack in your lap, waiting for the bell to ring. 

“I’ll tell you later,” you assured him.

When the bell rang, you threw your backpack over your shoulder and headed out of the door, ready for English. You were simply ready to be done with the day, it had already been long enough. 

“(y/n)!” It was like the call of Satan himself ringing in your ears. You stopped dead in your tracks in the middle of the crowded hallway as you heard Shawn’s voice, the anger in it obvious. It was almost comical. What could he possibly be angry at you for? Kylo stopped beside you, but he was looking back at Shawn with disdain clear in his eyes. After letting out a sigh, you decided to turn around, staring into the face of someone who now filled you with anger and disgust. It was truly amazing how all of those feelings seemed to stay within you. 

“What, Alvarez?” you snapped, and you could see him flinch ever so slightly at the coldness in your tone. The expression in his face soon contorted into one of rage, and as he stepped closer, you began to notice the crowd forming around the scene about to unfold. You decided to keep your face stone cold as he approached you, only about a foot away from you as he glared at you, eyes seemingly red from rage. It almost made you want to laugh.

“Don’t be like that, just because he’s making you this way. There’s no way you’re actually serious about this prick,” Shawn spat out, causing Kylo to scoff and cross his arms against his chest as he stared down at Shawn. Shawn looked up at Kylo with the same level of disdain.

“He’s not making me do anything, which is more than I can say for you,” you countered, turning Shawn’s focus back on you. His face changed to one of shock.

“I never made you do shit that you didn’t want to do-”

“Oh please. ‘(y/n), don’t wear that, what will people think?’ Or what about ‘you should really be careful who you hang around because that’s going to affect my reputation, too.’ You always tried to control me, and you’ll always try to control whatever poor girl you manage to snag in your traps of pretty words and soft looks. You’re so full of shit, Alvarez, I don’t even understand what I ever saw in you.” Shawn was speechless, which gave you the perfect opportunity to turn around and head towards English.

“Not like I would want a slut like you back, anyways,” he yelled out at you, causing silence to fall over the hall. It seemed like time had stopped as you turned back around to face Shawn. The silence remained as you looked him in the eyes. Then, you did the thing no one expected you to do. You laughed.

It wasn’t a soft laugh either, it was barely short of a cackle. After all, how could someone who cheated on you claim you were a slut? It was horribly comical and ironic.

“You know what, that’s really funny, considering I never once looked at anyone the way I looked at you while we were dating, and you were talking to some bitch from Corellia for a month before you were caught. Maybe think before you call someone a slut, because I think everyone knows who the real slut here is,” you said before walking off in a rush. You weren’t going to be late for class because of one asshole. 

You and Kylo managed to walk in right before the bell rang. As you sat down, you pulled out your things, and also pulled out your phone as well, the message from Poe seemingly weighing you down as you sat down, especially now that he was only a few feet away from you. 

“Why are you two so late? You’re never here after me,” Sami remarked as Phasma sat next to her, nodding. 

“Someone thought it was his time to be bold,” Kylo answered as you were paying attention to your phone. “But (y/n) really put him in his fucking place.” 

Sami looked back at you, and you smiled up at her. 

“I just don’t like being called names when the name actually better suits the accuser,” you simply stated. You turned back to your phone as Kylo began to explain what happened to Sami and Phasma. 

Opening the message, you felt your chest clench a little before you actually read the message.

Hey, can we talk after English? 

A simple request, but you really did have to decide if you had calmed down enough to actually talk to Poe. You decided that nothing could be worse than what you’d just done with Shawn, so you decided to humor him.

Sure. Just meet me right outside the front doors. 

You tried not to watch as Poe checked his phone after you sent the message, especially since Mr. Skywalker was beginning to talk about the rough drafts you’d all turned in last week, and how revisions needed to be made by Friday for your final copy. He walked around the class and passed everyone’s rough drafts back to them. You scanned through yours, taking note of the revisions you needed to make, and then you sneaked a peek at everyone else’s in your group. Sami had done fairly well, Phasma had done amazing, and so had Kylo. 

Mr. Skywalker then began calling individual students up for talks about their rough drafts. You simply sat back in your seat as students were called to his desk one by one to talk.

“Ben, you’re next,” he said, causing Kylo to let out a sigh as he grabbed his rough draft and headed for his uncle’s desk. You frowned as well, missing the natural state of comfort you got from being around Kylo, but you ignored it as you turned to Sami.

“So apparently, I’m having dinner with the Solo’s on Saturday,” you informed her. Sami smirked at you before laughing.

“Oh so it’s serious serious,” she responded, shaking her head. 

“I wish I could tell you I understood their family dynamic, but I have a feeling it’s more on Kylo’s part, he just doesn’t want to admit it,” Phasma added, turning to face you. 

“Yeah, I kinda picked that up already when I asked why he wasn’t close to his parents anymore,” you noted. “I guess I can just try and figure it out for myself.”

In not too long, Kylo returned to his seat. He plopped down into it, making the metal legs creak underneath his weight. You made eye contact with him and tried your hardest not to burst out laughing.

“Sami Martinez,” Mr. Skywalker called out, causing Sami to let out a groan as she walked up to Mr. Skywalker’s desk.

“So, are you gonna tell me what was bothering you earlier?” Kylo asked, leaning in so the two of you couldn’t be heard. You let out a sigh before leaning in as well, explaining the text from Poe, and your apprehension behind agreeing to meet up with him after class. Kylo simply nodded as he listened, and once you finished talking, he leaned over his notebook, picking up his pen and writing in the margins.

Maybe talking to him will be worth it. 

He had a point. Though it hadn’t been too long of a time that you’d had a hiatus with your old friends, it may still be gratifying to talk to at least one of them. The fact that it was Poe did make it better, as you had been friends with Poe since elementary school. After all, you, Poe, and Kylo had all been thick as thieves once. If anyone was going to understand why you’d been so drawn to Kylo, it would be him. You just hoped that would be the narrative of the conversation, instead of another shouting match. You were quite done with being angry at people for today. If he wanted to start a fight, he’d have to try again in the morning. 

Soon, Sami was returning to her desk as well, groaning again as she plopped into her seat. Almost immediately, Mr. Skywalker’s voice rang out in the class.

“Gwen Phasma, come on up,” he called. Phasma went up with no complaint, the normal quick stride in her walk that she always had. 

You tried to remain distracted, but your mind kept wandering to what you and Poe would talk about. It was making you anxious, and you really wanted class to be over so you could get it over with. 

Thankfully, after Phasma, Mr. Skywalker decided it was time to pack. Much to your dismay though, he did say that you would be the first to go tomorrow. At least you would have a clear head by then, and you could actually focus on what was being said to you. 

As usual, the four of you waited for the crowds to disperse before setting off towards the entrance of the school. Once you’d passed the front doors, you noticed Poe standing off to the side, waiting for you.

“I’ll wait for you in the car,” Kylo said before leaning over and placing a kiss on your forehead. You knew it was a part of the act, but your heart did flutter a little at the act of reassurance. It did help soothe your nerves a little. 

With a deep breath, you turned towards Poe, who was rubbing the nape of his neck and giving you a sheepish smile.

“What’s up?” you asked, trying not to sound cold and harsh. You wanted this to be as painless as possible, no matter what. 

“Nothing much. Do you want to sit?” Poe said, indicating to the bench on the edge of the sidewalk. You shrugged, then sat yourself down. Poe sat down next to you, looking towards the ground as he let out a deep breath.

“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry,” he said. You couldn’t lie, you were taken aback. Yeah, you’d hoped that this conversation would go like this, but the things you hoped for rarely ever came to fruition, so this felt like the twilight zone to say the least.

“Look, I said really shitty things because I was shocked and worried. I didn’t think about how they might affect you. Besides, I can see I was wrong to really worry, and I shouldn’t have been so shocked,” he continued. You were smiling until he said the last part.

“How do you mean, you shouldn’t have been so shocked?” you asked.

“I mean, you guys used to be really close. Let’s be real, the only reason you two grew apart is because of Shawn. It was about seventh grade when you started hanging out with Shawn, and when Be- I mean Kylo started to drift away from us. I was pretty sure he liked you then, too,” Poe said, which actually shocked you. You had never considered that Kylo had liked you romantically when you’d been friends in middle school. It almost felt like a shame, considering the relationship the two of you were in was a fake one. 

“Besides, he actually seems to treat you well. He does treat you well, right?” Poe asked, now looking into your eyes with feigned concern. You laughed at the expression on his face before shaking your head.

“Yes, he treats me well. I can’t explain it, but when I’m with Kylo, it really just feels like I’m home. It’s just a level of comfort with someone I’ve never experienced with anyone before,” you said. That was definitely true, especially since Kylo had been your rock since that very first day of school, which almost felt like ages ago. It was strange how the passage of time hadn’t changed the closeness you’d shared once the two of you began talking again. 

“Well, I’m glad. I also respect your decision, even though I didn’t really agree at first,” Poe said, looking out at the parking lot that was becoming barren with each leaving car. You could see Kylo’s Mustang in the distance, and you could also see that he was smoking a cig, his hand popping out of the window to get rid of the ash hanging on the end. 

“I forgive you, Poe,” you said as you reached in to hug him. Poe’s arms wrapped around you as well, and you felt your heart ease at the action. It felt good to have at least one of your friends back.

“Hey, have you talked to Rey about...everything recently?” you asked as you released your embrace, looking into Poe’s dark brown eyes.

“Yeah, she uh,” he paused for a moment as he thought what to say, which consequently made your heart drop. “She’s gonna need some more time to come around. She won’t really admit that anything she said was wrong, besides, she’s stubborn as hell. But, I’m sure with time, she’ll come around.” You frowned as you looked down at the concrete beneath your feet. Rey had been a close friend of yours ever since she’d been adopted by Mr. Skywalker, and the fact that this had torn your friendship apart felt terrible. 

You and Poe shared a goodbye before you headed to the car, where Kylo was patiently waiting, scrolling on his phone. As soon as you climbed in, he put the phone down, bringing the engine to life before turning to look at you.

“So?” he asked, cigarette hanging from his lips. 

“He apologized,” you said happily. Kylo smiled as well as he turned his head to watch while he backed out of his parking spot. 

“I told you talking to him might be worth it,” he said as he drove up to the exit of the parking lot, heading forward into your neighborhood. 

“Yeah, you were right,” you affirmed before staring out of the window, a smile gracing your lips. Now that one thing had gone right today, you felt it would be a lot easier to tackle a much bigger issue: telling your mom that you’re dating Kylo. 

[n-o-x-i-o-u-s]

I (don’t) Love Us (anymore)

I met you when I was 15. You were 16. You were the new kid from Nevada but didn’t notice me until the following year. I remember getting a notification on Facebook when I was with my friends; “Do you know him? Why did he add me?”-- I thought you added me by accident. Then you messaged me, “hiya. remember me? ^~^” I was even more scared. I thought you wanted to tell me how much of a poser I was or something.

You were with this girl, a psychotic weirdo. Even when you two were broken up she still stalked your life and tried to claim you, whist liking me. I didn’t believe you liked me, however. Immediately you “married” this then online “famous” girl, Pauline. I didn’t have a chance. You talked to so many girls I didn’t want to even bother fighting for a damn spot.

We texted everyday and got closer. I started to notice you everywhere. My friends knew I was starting to catch feeling and playfully teased me. One even tried to push me to you when we passed each other. I remember waving at you. Took me a lot of courage for that tiny gesture. Towards the end of the school year we met up a few times to hug for the entire lunch/recess. I remember loving the warm embrace.

However, I was with someone at that time. I told him I loved you. He wanted to kill himself at first, but acceptance as you lived closer and our chemistry was better. But your fucking exes wouldn’t leave you alone.

During the summer, I found out you were moving. Ultimately it was my choice somehow.. but you ended up moving. When you got back to Nevada, that was the first time you broke my heart. You were suddenly rude to me, and my menstrual cramps wasn’t making anything better. You didn’t know I knew your blog, I checked it as I did everyday.. “I love Brett. The end.” -- I should’ve stopped our story there.

You apologized after. Did what I told you to do: tell me you love me 100 times.

September 3rd, 2011. A date I will never forget. I came back from a family party. For the past few days I was vaguely giving you hints to ask me out, as I have no idea how to ask anyone out. We phone called. “Would you fancy a relationship?” ok, Cook. I rolled around, giggling, making weird seal noises. I’ve never been happier.

A day later your stupid ex yelled at you. Why? You’re not her property, haven’t been for like 6 months.. (remind you of anything?) I got hurt again. I don’t know howto deal with that kind of situation. Should I message her too? Yell? Let you take care of it. I was intimidated. I was weak. But why again? You were mine now.. what gave her the right?

A few months into our relationship, I found out through social media you went to prom with another girl, Lianza. I didn’t know anything but her profile picture. My stomach dropped, I felt like I had a heartquake. I couldn’t stop shaking. Friends or not, she previously posted a song on your profile. Talamak - Toro y Moi. The lyrics messed me up when I pieced things together.

Then, I had to go through another girl, Taylor. Thought she’d be our “relationship guardian angel”.. She was nice to me, but too nice to you. Didn’t know you two video chatted. Didn’t know you two were so close so quick. Envy consumed me.

Throughout a good, almost 2 years of our emotional relationship I’ve never been through so much girls names. I could make a mambo no. 5. I got so messed up it drove me insane. I assumed the worst in any scenario. I became abusive. I became destructive. I couldn’t stop. Endlessly harassed you if you didn’t reply quick enough. I hurt you because I was always questioning your love. Do you really love me enough to be hurt by me? You stopped replying like before. Took you hours. I only assumed you were talking to other people. That’s when I stepped way over the line and blackmailed you.

July 2013 we broke up. Knew it was my fault that time. You told me if I loved you in a year, you’d come back to me. I didn’t think I’d love anyone else. My best friend was dating your ex friend. It was hard, feeling so close to you but knowing it’s not the same you. I hung out with your high school friends too. They were good hearted and had nothing but nice intentions, but them being your friends in the past hurt me because all I thought about was you.

A month later, I found out the hard way, social media again, you found someone else, Jessica. My heart shattered. I scream cried. I drank vodka straight from the bottle and kept myself intoxicated for days just to make the pain somewhat tolerable. I had to do hypnosis. I called my best friend up screaming, I called her boyfriend at that time too. They didn’t know.

I tried so hard to see if we could reconcile, forgetting how much pain I’ve caused you and that it takes a long time to forgive. I contacted you through email. You told me you loved her and you’re not letting anything come between you two. In February 2014 I accepted it. I said my goodbye via email.

May 2014.. I woke up from a bad dream that got me shaken up. It was of you. You had long hair in a ponytail, and was crying. Your sister came to me and told me you needed me and you wanted to kill yourself. I woke up shaking, but calmed down and tried to remember it was only a dream. An hour later, I got an ask on my main from a deleted blog. It looked like a cry for help. I checked where the ip address was located. Reno. I knew it was you.

You then came back into my life. I felt like I was on eggshells. I didn’t want to fuck it up again. Suddenly I guess we were okay again. You still loved me. My heart felt better than the last 10 months.. I moved to California not too long after. I was away from familiarity. I guess that’s what you took advantage of. You started to hurt me directly. I thought you were the one so I just tried to take it. You would tell me how much you missed and loved your ex. You masturbated to her, and loved fucking her. That I was “just jealous that she bounced on you and not me”. It hurt even IF it weren’t true.

You’d leave me every weekend, drank and partied with your friends. I hated your best friend especially. I couldn’t concentrate and stopped trying in school because my mental health was getting bad again. I stayed up til sunrise and slept til sunset. I didn’t want to live anymore. I just stayed in bed all day doing nothing but cry.

I moved back home. I felt a bit better but it was harder because I was so used to living alone, I didn’t have the space to cry.. then I met someone else.

He became my best friend. Someone I would rant to when things got heated between you and I.

I became hurt to the point of being spiteful. I used him to hurt you like you did with Jessica. I felt powerful. Two could play at that game.

Everything was a blur, full of abuse and fights. I only remember begging for you a lot and you being drunk a lot.

December 2018, you finally visit because I bought you a ticket to prove my love and devotion to you. We rented a bnb. I’ll never forget that time. It felt like we were actual getting to know each other in a calm way. It felt like Howl’s Moving Castle. You met a few friends and family. I thought things were nice again.

You came back again in March. I felt like things were a bit different. We got into more fights. You even pulled your arm away from me in the middle of Waikiki because you thought I was flirting with a guy. I guess smiling and saying hi is flirting. You met my birth dad’s side of the family. You proposed to me at the beach. I thought everything was perfect after that.

That following night, my sister stayed with us. I left my phone in the bathroom and you went on my Snapchat. You found a message from 2016, when we weren’t even together, of my ex best friend saying he loves me. You got angry, I got drunk. I wanted to just go home so bad. How do I deal with walking on eggshells in person? At least through text messages you can avoid it easily by not replying.

Then you started hurting me again. You threatened to kill yourself with your uncle’s gun a few times. Scared the shit out of me.

I went back to San Francisco for pride at the end of June. You came down to meet with me.

I met your friends, including the one I don’t like. They had you take acid. In the Golden Gate Park. Could things get any worse? I had an anxiety attack from stress and realizing you were tripping. One huge park with lots to do, and all we did was lay in a fucking field that looks like any other field. I ran away. I had a hard time breathing. I’ve never been so upset at anyone. I actually think I almost been my angriest.

Your birthday came and you were so fucking snobby. “I knew you were gonna get me a cake. Oh, my best birthday ever was when I was 8. I always have shitty birthdays”. I wanted to give you a nice birthday so bad you negative asshole. We went to the piers. Snobby again. Racist. Calling any brown-local looking person “monkeys” knowing damn well I’m local. I’d say more on this trip but it’s fucking tiring to remember it.

Then you visit me. It was my family reunion on my grandma’s side. You met a good amount of people. I was ecstatic to have you be a part of my family.

You stayed for a month. I don’t know how much fights we’ve got into. Is this how it’ll be if you moved in with me? Is this how it’s going to be for the rest of my life once we’re married?

We’re two different people, different cultures. What’s okay with you wasn’t okay with me. I’ve never been so upset with someone so often.. is that how love is suppose to be?

Two fights I’ll never forget is at the beach. I tried to pick up your stupid expensive sunglasses your dumbass brought into the ocean with my toes, because that’s how I pick things up if I can’t use my hands. You called me useless after getting it yourself. (Hey, I didn’t have to help you in the first place, buddy.) My blood boiled. I wanted to leave you at the beach desperately. I drove recklessly, causing my hoses in my car to burst. You ended up staying an extra week because I paid for it.

Another was when we were watching my grandma’s house. I felt something was off. I pried your phones out your hands.. Ah yes, lovely Aspen. How I’ve missed you. I realized I’m going to eternally going to have to go through girls with you. You denied it and literally screamed in my face til I cried. My ears start ringing when I think about it. You whipped a blanket at my face too.

I would bring you to places and try to show you things but it was always “I didn’t ask to come here”. Do I really need this negativity..?

You finally left. I felt drained. I knew it was the beginning of an end.

Things were back to our normal texting routine. I grew tired.

August, I was trying to find something on your Facebook. I ended up finding something else. You had someone else back in 2015 when we were still talking. Jordan.. I’ve never been so heartbroken again. Is this a nightmare? I was sleeping over my best friends house too, which made it worse. I had to go into the garage to weep. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t sleep. My energy was so bad, her front door even opened. A ghost actually checked up on me. That’s when I knew I couldn’t handle this anymore.

November, you called it off. I made a joke about your best friend maybe liking me because of him always trying to sabotage us. You didn’t take it lightly. I don’t blame you because I’ve made harmful jokes on going to your brother and friends in the past.

One of your friends said asshole things to me and you didn’t do anything to stand up for me. You didn’t respect me.

For months until this June, I still wanted to be in contact. I wanted to at least be friends because you were there a lot of times regardless where we stood.. but things built up. I’ve realized this is always going to be a cycle. Love > fight > heartbreak > reconcile. As much as I loved you, and as much as I wanted things to work out-- even if we got along and were close, the bad outweighed the good. I’ve never hated so many people I’ve never met. Never cringed at so many girl names to the point where I used to have a burn book. I could make a damn list. I couldn’t do it anymore. You would always cry to other people whenever things went wrong and some even came to me. You even turned things around, started harassing me (AND my friends and family which I’ve never done to you), gaslighted me, verbally abused me, and even blackmailed me back which was the whole reason why we broke up in the first place.

I’m greatly traumatized. I’ll always be a ‘fat face whore’ to you. I’ll never be good enough for you. There will always be a “sweetie” better than me. I’ll always be inferior. How can you give me all that shit but don’t want me to go to anyone else? There’s a difference between cheating, and constantly breaking up with someone and calling an engagement off, then pushing them away, and telling them to leave you alone.

With all of this over, my heart’s been the most at peace it’s ever been in years..

Travis, if you’re reading this. Know this is a goodbye message. I’m no longer here to give you anymore “worst” years. Live your upcoming best years. We’re no longer at each other’s necks, there’s nothing to worry about anymore. Please never contact me or my friends or family again.

#personal #long post #reposting cause this psycho ass decided to reply and taint it

[friendliest-place-on-earth]

Homecoming (Sprace)

Mod Ind here oh would you look at that, a oneshot! Please enjoy!

You can also read it on AO3 here

“Look at them.” Race nudged Spot on the shoulder in the direction of their friends Jack and Davey, who were talking very close.

“I bet they’ll get together before homecoming.” Race declared. It was September, with homecoming only a month away, everyone was either getting asked or wished they were.

“Nah, they’re getting together after homecoming.” Spot countered. Davey seemed to get pretty jumpy whenever Jack showed up recently, so he figured it would take some time for him to actually admit his feelings.

“You wanna put your money where you mouth is?” Race wiggled his eyebrows, unable to resist a good gamble.

“I wanna put your mouth where my mouth is.”

“Real smooth, Spotty.” Spot playfully slugged Race in the arm.

“Twenty bucks says they get together before homecoming.” Race gambled.

“Boooring.” Spot groaned.

“Fine, how about…” An evil grin replaced a thoughtful look on Race’s face.

“Whoever loses the bet has to wear a dress to homecoming!” Race giggled. Spot didn’t necessarily want to do that, but he couldn’t back down from a challenge either. They shook hands and the bell rang soon after that, and it was time to head to class.

The two boys waited a full week, watching over Jack and Davey very carefully so they didn’t miss a thing. They were walking to lunch, which they thankfully had with all of their other friends.

“Anyone seen Jack?” Race asked. Jack was usually the first one at the table because he didn’t go through the lunch line since Medda packed his lunches. Murmurs spread throughout the table in various forms of “no”.

“What the hell…” Spot noticed Jack was walking down the stairs that led to the lunch room with a few small flowers in his hand. He quickly strode to the edge of the table where Davey sat, and presented him with said flowers.

“David Jacobs, would you do me the honor of being my date for homecoming?” he plastered a cheesy smile on his face, but it was easy to see the nervousness breaking through.

“Oh my goodness, you’re so extra.” Davey laughed, hiding his face behind his hand.

“Of course I’ll go to homecoming with you.” he stood up and the entire table cheered. Jack excitedly wrapped his arms around Davey’s waist and pulled him in for a hug. They definitely would’ve kissed, but there were a lot of teachers around ready for enforce the strict “no PDA policy”. They sat down across from one another and began an animated conversation about what they would wear to the dance.

“So, what color dress are you wearin’?” Race asked, leaning into Spot and looking up at him with a teasing grin.

“It’ll be red, you asshole.” he glared. A little ball of worry settled itself into Spot’s stomach, but he’d already made his peace with the bet.

“I bet you’ll look gorgeous.” Race pressed a quick kiss to Spot’s cheek.

“Ah whatever, you’re just excited to see your boyfriend in a dress.” Spot laughed.

“You betcha.” Race winked. Spot punched Race in the arm and then leaned into his side.

“Hey Spot!” someone called. He turned around and noticed a mop of rusty red curls bouncing towards him. It was the end of the day and frankly, Spot was ready to head home and take a nap.

“Hey Katherine.” he said, walking next to her. They were quickly joined by Katherine’s girlfriend, Sarah.

“So, we’re going dress shopping later today for homecoming. Do you want to come with us?” She asked, surprisingly without a hint of sarcasm.

“How’d you-”

“Race told us.” Sarah answered. Of course he did. Spot thought, shaking his head.

“Sure, why not.” he shrugged his shoulders.

“Great! I’ll pick you up at five and then we could get something to eat afterwards?” Katherine proposed. Spot nodded his head and quickly shuffled his way onto the bus outside and shoved his earbuds in his ears and tuned everyone else out.

[Kath] Get ready nerd, I’ll be there in five mins

[You] Fine

“I’m leavin’ ma! I’m having dinner with some friends!” Spot called into the the depths of his small house.

“Alright, be safe!” she replied just as loudly. Spot sat on his front porch as he waited for Katherine and Sarah to pull into his driveway. Soon enough, a small minivan that must belong to Kath’s father honked its horn, making Spot jump five feet in the air.

“Get in loser, we’re going shopping!” Katherine hollered out the window. Spot heard Sarah’s laughter from outside the car as he approached it.

“Okay Spot, have you ever bought a dress before?” Katherine asked as she pulled out of his driveway.

“Nope.”

“That’s fine, we’ll let you know what to look for.” she replied.

“Well what color are you thinking of?” Sarah asked.

“How about red?” Spot offered. Sarah turned around in her seat so she could look the brooklyn boy up and down.

“I agree with that.” she finally said with a swift nod of her head.

“So we’re going to be looking for a dress that doesn’t go past the knees, short dresses are for homecoming, long ones are for prom.” Katherine stated matter-of-factly.

“Why’s that?” Spot asked. He didn’t realize there were actually rules for dances.

“It’s just the way it is, no one knows why, we just don’t argue.” Sarah told him. They sat in silence for the rest of the car ride while they thought about what dresses they would be getting.

“I’m thinking about getting a blue one with a flowey bottom…” Sarah said wistfully.

“I”m gonna go with something purple, it’s dramatic enough without the effort.” Katherine chimed in.

“Spot, we’re going to have to get you some shoes too.” Spot groaned loudly, he knew very little about dresses, but he knew the dangers of high heels from all the times his friends complained about having to wear them.

“Don’t worry you big baby! We’ll find ones with a little bit of heel but enough to show off your legs.” Katherine reassured him. How can shoes show off my legs…? Spot wondered, not wanting to ask.

“Alright we’re here!” Katherine exclaimed, pulling into the mall parking lot. Since they’d gone shopping quite a while before the dance, it was less crowded. They piled out of the car and headed towards one of the dress shops that Spot had heard of but never actually visited.

“Okay Spot, I’m going to help you find a dress and Sarah will find you some shoes afterwards.” Katherine’s girlfriend left the two of them alone to find a dress of her own.

“Since you’re so small, it might be a little trickier to find a dress that fits but we’ll make it work.” said Katherine, looking through the many dresses in his size. After pointing out many beautiful looking outfits and getting rejected, she finally came upon a red dress with no sleeves.

“I like this one.” Spot took it into his hands and dashed into the changing room, eager to this whole thing over with. He pulled it over his head and put his arms in through the two hole at the top. With the dress finally on, Spot stepped back to admire his reflection, and he didn’t look half bad so he thought. The top section sparkled with a bunch of little gems over a soft white fabric. The dress with soft at the bottom, like a flowing red sea as it swished around his knees. It went in a little bit at the waist and Spot turned around to look at his own ass and was satisfied with what he saw. All in all, this dress wasn’t too bad.

“Alright Katherine…” Spot mumbled as he unlocked the door of the changing room.

“I wanna see! I wanna see!” she eagerly chanted. He cautiously stepped out to wear she was sitting.

“Oh my goodness, it’s perfect!” Katherine gasped. She pulled out her phone and Sarah quickly appeared by her side.

“Spot!” she squealed.

“Give us a twirl!” Sarah moved her hand in a circular motion and Spot did as he was told. He spun in a slow circle and the bottom lifted up gracefully and billowed in the air.

“Do you like it?” Sarah asked.

“I mean…” he was for once, shy about this.

“You can say no if you don’t like it.” she reassured him.

“No I just…”

“It’s okay to say you like it too.” Katherine pointed out.

“Yeah it looks fantastic on you, it’s not weird to appreciate that. Besides, dresses are for everyone!” Sarah said.

“I guess I kind of like it…” Spot gripped the fabric of the skirt.

“Kind of? If you don’t like it we can look for a different one.”

“No, I like this one.” Spot grumbled

“Wonderful, now it’s time for shoes!” Sarah exclaimed, dragging Spot by the arm.

“I still have this on!”

“I’ll get your stuff Spot!” Katherine called as he was being dragged away.

“Okay so I saw these as I was picking out something…” she searched for a moment in the pile of footwear and returned with a pair of cream colored shoes with a tiny heel. Surprisingly, they were the right size, and Spot slid the shoes on and went to look at himself in the mirror.

“If you look at your calves you’ll see that the elevation makes them look more toned.” Sarah explained. He stepped in and out of the shoes and noticed that she was right, he calves looked pretty good.

“Alright now that we’ve got you taken care of, you can just wait for Kath and I to try stuff on.” she smiled, gesturing over to the benches. Katherine returned with Spot’s clothes and he got changed while he waited for the inevitable fashion show. They had agreed to show Spot the dresses one at a time so they would still be surprised at the dance. Sarah stepped out first in a pale blue dress with a lace collar and a space cut out right in the middle of it.

“So, how does it look?” she asked excitedly. She did a few turns as the bottom of the dress swished like Spot’s did.

“I think it looks great.” Spot declared. If it had come from anyone other than Spot, she would’ve doubted the sincerity.

“How about the shoes?” She pointed to her feet, showing off the sparkly heels that made her look a great deal taller.

“Looks great with the dress.” Sarah nodded quickly and walked back into the dressing room, obviously satisfied with her choices.

“Alright, Katherine you can come out now!” Spot hollered.

“You know damn well I came out two years ago.” a loud laugh from Sarah was heard as her girlfriend emerged in a deep purple outfit. She did a little twirl which revealed that the back of her dress was cut out and it looked very elegant. It wasn’t quite as sparkly as the others, but it looked very silky and soft.

“Fantastic Katherine.” Spot commented.

“Alright, now we have two options for shoes.” she walked around in a pair of black flats which looked fine, but didn’t do anything for the dress.

“Okay, now we have these…” Kath sat down and put on a pair of glittery silver shoes with an inch heel and strutted around in those.

“I like those much better. They look good on your… calves” Spot said, bullshitting his way through fashion.

“Are you sure?” Katherine asked, looking at herself in a mirror.

“Positive. Now, let’s buy all this shit so we can go eat.” he was pretty hungry and didn’t expect dress shopping to be this draining.

“Alright, alright. Just let me get changed.” Everyone was feeling good about the clothes they had bought, so they all went to the counter to buy them. Spot ended up spending almost all of the money he’d brought which he’d been saving up for a while.

“Beauty is pain, Spot.” Sarah huffed as she paid for her things. They finally left the store and went to the nearest restaurant, which happened to be a fast food place.

“Three orders of large fries please!” Katherine began.

Almost a month had passed since the Spot, Katherine, and Sarah had gone shopping and it was finally time for the homecoming dance. Everyone was either driving or being driven by their date, and Race really wanted to drive for some reason. Spot’s mom had been informed of her son’s style choices for that evening and also why this was happening, so she wouldn’t be shocked later that evening.

“You look wonderful, Sean.” she beamed, smoothing the dress over his shoulders.

“Thanks ma.” the doorbell rang and Spot’s mom quickly left his room to go answer it.

“Anthony, nice to see you! Don’t you look handsome!” Spot heard from upstairs. The parents, of course, didn’t use the boys’ nicknames.

“Thank you so much Ms. Conlon!”

“You can wait right here, Sean will be down in just a moment.” Spot’s mom said cheerfully, leaving the room to make herself busy elsewhere. Spot quickly put on his shoes and ran through the hallway, but composed himself just before he began his descent down the stairs. It truly was like a scene out of a movie, he slowly climbed down the stairs with his dress swaying behind him and he did not trip once. Spot turned to look out over the banister and saw Race’s face beaming back at him.

“Spot you look amazing!” he exclaimed, covering his face with his hands in an attempt to hide his blush.

“Ah you’re just sayin’ that.” Spot replied bashfully, making his way to his boyfriend.

“I am not! Look at you!” Race was able to admire Spot’s full image as the stepped off the stairs.

“You don’t look too bad yourself you know.” Spot laughed, kissing Race hello. He was wearing a black suit with a red bowtie to match Spot’s dress. Race couldn’t stop staring at his gorgeous boyfriend because holy shit, Spot’s in a dress and he looks fantastic.

“Okay you too, let’s get some pictures!” Spot mom exclaimed, joining them in the hallway. She pulled out the camera she only used for special occasions and brought the couple out onto the lawn. They posed awkwardly, as expected but everyone was just happy to be there.

“You both look so cute together! Smile!” she snapped a few pictures before she finally put the camera away and went to kiss her son goodbye.

“Have fun, be safe!” she told them as they hopped into Race’s car.

“We will, ma!” Spot hollered out the passenger seat window. Race turned the car on and pulled out of the driveway, ready for the dance. They rolled up the windows and Race immediately started playing Shape of You by Ed Sheeran. They of course lip synched all the way to the school, which wasn’t very far from Spot’s house.

“Wait here!” Race exclaimed as they pulled into a parking spot. He quickly ran around the front of his car and opened Spot’s door for him.

“Your evening awaits.” he said cordially, taking his boyfriend’s hand as he stepped out of the car.

“You’re such an idiot.” Spot laughed. Race pretended to look offended and pressed a kiss to Spot’s cheek. They held hands all the way to the cafeteria, which had been cleared out so they could have a bigger space for the dance. They were the first of their friends to arrive, so they waited by the edge of the crowd for them to arrive.

“When are they gonna do some slow songs?” Race whined, looking out into the crowd of people dancing to something by Taylor Swift.

“Be patient will ya?” Jack and Davey along with Katherine and Sarah walked in through the front doors of the school building.

“Hey everybody!” Race said cheerfully. They were soon joined by Romeo, Specs, Crutchie, and Finch. Once everybody had arrived it was socially acceptable to start dancing.Specs dragged Romeo out onto the dance floor but everyone else decided to save their energy for later.

“So, how was dress shopping?” Jack asked, smirking at Spot.

“It was wonderful, thank you very much.” Spot swished his skirt instead of crossing his arms.

“I think Spot looks amazing.” Race added. The entire time Spot had been standing Race was almost exclusively staring at him and most likely his ass.

“No one said he didn’t.” Davey said.

“I know, I just thought it was something I should say.” Spot kissed Race quickly.

“You’re too kind.” he smiled. A slow song finally started playing so all the couple paired off and dragged their significant other out onto the dance floor. Crutchie preferred not to dance at this time, so him and Finch sat together for an intimate talking session. Race and Spot placed one hand behind the other’s back and held each other’s hand.

“You do look amazing you know.” Race whispered.

“So I’ve been told.” Spot smirked.

“No I mean, holy shit, I knew you would look good but it’s just wow.” Race stared on in disbelief.

“You’re the best you know that?” Spot blushed furiously, he wasn’t used to constant compliments like these.

“Yeah, I know.”

“Maybe I should wear a dress more often then, huh?” the shorter boy smirked.

“Hell yes.” Race spun Spot slowly in the middle of the dance floor and his dress swirled effortlessly. No matter what anyone else could’ve said, Race would always believe Spot was the most gorgeous person in all the world.

#sprace #spot conlon #racetrack higgins #race higgins #javid #jack kelly #david jacobs #newsbians #katherine plumber #sarah jacobs #newsies #newsies fanfiction #crutchie morris #specs #romeo #finch #this boy looks great in a dress

[heelmaryse]

5 things tag

thanks @tvrnbvckle & @swedish-strong-style & @morie-leigh for the tag, i know i’m doing this suuuper late but it’s better late than never right? :)) (and sorry if this is super long, i tend to ramble haha)

5 things you’ll find in my bag: - my oyster, which for those of you who don’t know is the card i beep on buses and trains to use them for transport lmao. i’m on my fifth one or something tho, cos i keep losing them (once i snapped one in half somehow lmao) but yeah - mcdonalds’ coupons. basically every time you fill your oyster, you get a receipt which is also a mcdonalds’ coupon. it’s  £1.99 for a burger and medium fries... i never use them tho cos mcdonalds’ is unhealthy so i have a lot of them gathered up lmao - rings?? idek but i just checked my bag and i have like four different rings in there? idk why, i think i put them on cos they look cute, then i get annoyed by them and stuff them in my bag - which is where they stay and where they are now  - lip balm, like those circular flat containers of vaseline, the pink one of course :) - idk, probably my phone? my headphones? i don’t like carrying that much stuff cos i don’t like heavy stuff ahahah

5 things you’ll find in my bedroom: - these really nicely professionally taken pictures from prom, which i got for free, on like a black background thingy? they’re really glossy and nice and i have them on my vanity. - this framed picture of me kissing my little brother’s cheek when we’re both really small, i think it’s the cutest thing ever omg!! my brother was like the cutest baby awwwww - a fucking fan which i blast right on my face cos it’s so hot sometimes lmaoo - clothes... like my room is a fuckign mini closet it’s overflowing with clothes, there’s so many clothes you can’t even see the carpet lmaooo - a lot of books, like mostly school text books and then a lot of fiction books (even though i gave most of them away to an old book shop, but yeah a lot of books)

5 things I’ve always wanted to do: - career-wise, i’m still so confused cos i wanna do so many things. i love fashion design, and i’d love to open my own boutique/clothing brand. but i also want to be an author? or some type of journalist... or you know, writing for fashion magazines or something :)  - if none of that, then i also just wanna be a housewife tbh :) and just have kids and be like, an amazing cook and mother and wife and i know this sounds so cheesy so i’m gonna stop I AM SORRY - go on a road trip! i’ve literally never been on a road trip and i wanna go on a road trip except not in england but like in america and i want it to be with friends ahahah - go to a wrestling show??? i have never ever been to one omfg, and i’d love to go... but only one which has aj in it, else i don’t really care :)) - currently, in the short term, go to uni finally, like move out of my parents’ house tbh

5 things that make me feel happy: - AJ - my brothers, like they’re really funny and cute and honestly i’m so happy i’m not an only child ahahaha - my friends, we have like the wildest adventures and it’s never boring and we can talk for like days and days and you know that feeling when you laugh so hard you feel like you’re gonna get abs?? that’s what it’s like with them hehe. - talking to my anons on tumblr of course!!!! - when someone buys me stuff, like clothes or jewelry :))

5 things I’m currently into: - wrestling, but i’ve always been into that - drawing, i’ve recently got back into it now that i have more time and i don’t write that much - makeup, cos i got some new palettes and makeup is 100x more fun when you have more eye shadow palettes to play with hehe - love island lmao - ex on the beach AHAHAHAH

5 things on my to do list: - literally i don’t even know, i like to go with the flow - i need to dye my hair a lighter brown cos it’s summer, i think... like it’s already light as you guys know, but idk i wanna go lighter - spend as much time with friends as possible before going to uni this september - idk - nothing else i can think of ahahah

if you read all that, then i love you ahahaha, i’m gonna tag @we-work-hard @unabashedwwesmut @castielscamander and everyone else has already been tagged LOL so yeah there u go 

#me