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xieyaohuan · 2 years

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Ravishing a god

Fandom: The Boys

Pairing: Billy Butcher/Homelander

Summary: Homelander’s got himself trapped. Billy decides to take advantage. It's a good thing he’s definitely not attracted to the cunt.

Notes: There were no Butchlander tickle fics, so I wrote one!

This takes place in an AU where Soldier Boy wasn't captured, and Maeve didn't lose her powers, but Butcher and Homelander have reluctantly teamed up because they're madly in love with each other but can't admit it.

Written for august-anon's TickleTober 2022 challenge, prompt no. 9: "Trapped" (I'm doing these out of order, and no way I'll manage to write 31 of them)

Part 1 of 2;

Read on AO3

Warnings: non-con/VERY dub-con; canon-appropriate level of swearing; bondage; part 1 is semi safe for work?

Billy Butcher is stuck in traffic when he sees the first explosion. There’s a bright flash, and a cloud of dust and debris raining down from what’s probably somewhere between the tenth and fifteenth floor of yet another half empty office building. This is where supes go to fight these days. Less property damage. Fewer deaths. Legal drama is rare. Everybody wins.

He’s not far now, so Billy decides to get out of the car and walk the rest of the way. There’s a second explosion, and the numbers on his geiger counter are spiking now. Fucking Soldier Boy and his propensity to blow shit up for attention.

It’s all quiet by the time he arrives at the building, except for a handful of spectators. Billy’s not usually one to miss a fight, but of course Homelander had to fly ahead and didn’t take him with him, not that he would have ever agreed to let that bastard carry him (the supe also didn’t offer, he can't help but notice).

Billy quickly ducks around the corner of the buiding and lights a cigarette. He’s here now, so he might as well wait for the caped cunt to come out, make sure Soldier Boy didn’t bruise his ego too badly, maybe gloat a little, and then drive home. Drive Homelander home, too, in case he got hit by that white chest blast from hell again. It’s happened more than once now, and it doesn’t really seem to harm him much, except it fries his powers for a few hours.

By the time Billy finishes his cigarette and casually flicks the butt on the ground, all is still quiet, but there’s also still no sign of Homelander. Fucking great, now he’s got to go look for the cunt in the nuclear wasteland Soldier Boy’s left behind. If the Temp V doesn’t kill him soon, the bloody radiation will.

This is what he gets for agreeing to this silly little scorched earth team-up make-believe whatever you want to call it.

That’s right. The media have latched on to their story, because everything has to be a fucking media spectacle these days, apparently. Vought is trying to sell them as some ridiculous arch enemies to lovers story. The lovers part is bollocks, of course, but the world can’t seem to get enough of them. (Their Q-rating is a solid 95, which isn’t the best, as Homelander has pointed out, but pretty damn close, not that Billy would give a fuck or know what a Q-rating is.)

Yeah. He’s stuck with Captain Cunt now, so he might as well go check up on him.

Billy sighs and enters the building through the side entrance. The elevator is broken after the blast, so he takes the stairs, following the blast damage in reverse. He can tell the room the supes fought in by the way that the door is ripped out of the wall and there’s a hole in the ceiling.

“Oi!” Billy calls. “Anybody home?”

Homelander is lying flat on his back amidst the rubble and shredded office supplies, arms above his head, eyes closed. Soldier Boys must have hit him from up close and knocked him out.

Billy steps closer and takes another look. Nah, cunt’s awake. He probably heard Butcher coming from a mile away but is choosing to ignore him.

“Oi!” He repeats, bending down to tap the supe's head. “Anybody home?”

Homelander is still refusing to acknowledge his presence, but his face is twitching ever so slightly. And then Billy sees it. Underneath the rubble there’s a bloody steel pipe wrapped twice around his wrists, ends slammed into the ground, pinning his hands above his head.

Bloody hell.

It’s like Soldier Boy left the cunt here, gift-wrapped, just for him. Ben’s got that twisted sense of humor, and the pipe doesn’t exactly look like it wrapped itself so perfectly around Homelander’s wrists through the sheer force of the explosion. Billy makes a mental note to reciprocate the favor at some point. He and Soldier Boy may be arch enemies now - doesn’t mean they can’t give each other small gifts every once in a while.

“Well, well, well,” he says. “Looks like America’s sweetheart got himself trapped.”

Homelander’s eyes snap open. “Thank you, Captain Obvious. I would not have noticed had you not pointed it out.” Billy can’t quite tell if he’s annoyed or amused or a bit of both. All he knows is the bloody supe’s so fucking full of himself it’s gotta hurt him physically.

“Told ya not to get ahead of yourself, but you never listen.”

“That’s all very fascinating, but I need you to stop your lecture and help me get out of here, William,” Homelander says, unfazed. “I need to be on set in two hours.”

“Yeah, don’t think you’re gonna make that, love.” Billy smirks. And with that, he’s finally got the supe’s full attention.

“Ah, okay.” Homelander smiles and nods, then drops the smile in an instance. “And. Why. Is. That?”

Billy could tell him that he can’t break the pipe because he’s got no Temp V in his system. That would be a blatant lie, of course; he wouldn’t have headed to a supe fight without it, and Homelander knows it. Or he could tell him that it’s not his job to save his spoiled arse, so he’s going to have to wait for the Vought crew to show up.

Instead, he squats down next to Homelander and places a finger under his chin. “I just think you look awfully pretty pinned down like this. Think I’m just gonna sit here and watch for a bit.”

Homelander has the gall to sneer and cross his legs. “Make yourself comfortable. May I offer you some tea to enjoy with the view?”

He looks just a little too complacent for someone in his predicament. How often has Billy fantasized about wiping that smug grin off the cocky bastard’s face. Despite his shitty upbringing, he’s got honor though, occasionally at least. It’s not terribly honorable to hit a man who can’t hit him back. It’s not very entertaining either, come to think of it.

Billy’s grin widens. Yeah, he knows what he’s going to do instead, and he suspects it’s going to be just as satisfying as beating the cunt up. Now that he thinks about it, probably more. If he’s honest with himself, he’s always wanted to try this.

He places one hand on the supe’s chest and slowly starts sliding it down.

Homelander rolls his eyes. “You gonna grab a feel now? Really, William? That’s low.” Billy’s move has the intended effect though: his body has tensed up, and his eyes follow the hand as it trails down his suit, tracing the fake muscles.

“Maybe.” Billy straddles Homelander’s thighs. The cunt sure looks less smug now, making a last ditch effort to twist his hands free. Futile, of course; Billy makes a mental note to send Maeve a thank you before he resumes lightly grazing his sides.

There’s absolutely no doubt Homelander can feel his hands even through the thick padding of his suit; he’s scrunching his face and trying to wiggle away, all while trying to pretend that absolutely nothing is happening and that Billy hasn’t just discovered a pretty fundamental weakness in his natural armor.

This is going to be fucking delightful. Billy feels a flutter in his stomach. He unbuckles the other man’s golden belt and starts pulling out the top of his suit, just enough to reveal a thin strip of perfect marble skin.

“Oh for God’s sake, William, control yourself!” Homelander protests. He’s still trying to hide behind a thick layer of snark and sarcasm, but he’s nervous now, and Billy wonders if he knows yet what he’s got coming for him.

He slides his hand under the fabric. Homelander’s skin feels strangely normal, soft even, not at all like the practically impenetrable suit that it really is. He lightly brushes his fingers over Homelander’s belly and gets a brief burst of laughter in return.

“What the fuck, Butcher! What-” There’s surprise in the supe’s voice, something like anger, and, as Billy notes with satisfaction, a hint of panic. No. The caped cunt clearly did not see this one coming.

Butcher sits back to contemplate. If Homelander has lost his powers that probably means his supe-senses are weaker too. Which is a real shame, Billy thinks, but doesn’t really matter because he’s quite pleased with the reactions he’s getting so far, and this is much less likely to result in death and broken limbs. Let no one ever claim that Billy Butcher can’t spot an acceptable compromise when he sees one.

He slides his other hand underneath the dark blue fabric, squeezing both of Homelander’s hips at the same time, then watches him struggle to suppress a very childish giggle.

“This is ridiculous.” Homelander’s voice is strained; his whole body is twisting to get away from the hands that are prodding and probing his waist as they slowly slide upwards.

“You’re right, this is ridiculous,” Billy agrees. “Your silly costume’s too bloody tight, can’t even move my hands properly.” He rips the suit top open with both hands and pushes it up as far as he can, tearing off a golden eagle in the process, not that he cares. The bloody cape’s still half stuck underneath a struggling and cursing Homelander.

Billy thinks for a moment, then rips it out, folds it in half twice and pushes it under the supe’s head. “Wouldn’t want you to be uncomfortable, darling.”

“You need help,” Homelander says. He’s recovered some of his composure and all of his snark. “Your, your obsession with me… it’s unhealthy, William, you know.”

“You’re the one who insists we play lovers for the cameras,” Billy points out, “and bait the media with that silly enemies to lovers fantasy Vought made up.”

“That’s… that’s just for the points,” Homelander says, a little too quickly.

Billy smirks, watching the supe blush just a little. “Yeah, sure it is.”

He takes another look at his work. Homelander isn’t half as muscular as his now shredded suit would suggest. Half naked, arms pinned above his head, strands of blond hair falling into his face, his head resting on a makeshift pillow of red white and blue… the cunt looks pretty ridiculous. Grotesque, really, distractingly grotesque. Butcher definitely doesn’t find him attractive. Absolutely not.

Fine. So what if he does?

“Right.” Billy snaps out of his thoughts to refocus on the task at hand. He pulls Homelander’s pants down just enough to reveal red briefs (red bloody briefs, god, is there no end to this man’s tackiness?). Then he lazily runs a single digit along the line where red fabric meets pale skin, back and forth, watching as Homelander’s facial expression changes from annoyed to uneasy to actively distressed.

“Fuck! Will you stop that, you fucking pervert!” The cunt may be hurling curses at him, but his voice is cracking now, and Billy knows he’s very close to completely cracking him open. All of this with just a single finger; he’s got to make sure to remember that spot. The thought of seeing that bloody marble statue of a body writhe and twist underneath him is fucking electrifying. He hasn’t felt this alive in years.

“Stop!” Homelander cries.

“Oh, but I’m only gettin’ started.” Billy leans forward until he lies comfortably on top of the supe, his legs pinning his thighs, one elbow pressing down on his shoulder, his own head right next to Homelander’s. It looks quite obscene, probably. If someone were to walk in on them now, they’d have questions.

“Mmmmmhhh. Where’d that smile go?” He gently cups Homelander’s face with one hand while the other moves playfully across his armpit, his belly, his sides. He can’t see where his hand is going, so he’s navigating entirely by the responses he’s getting. “Oh, you are going to smile for me, love.” That, and so much more.

Homelander is whimpering softly now, shaking his head, kicking his legs, pressing his lips together, clenching and unclenching his hands, trying anything really to distract himself. He’s not protesting anymore; he probably knows full well that any sentence he starts now is going to end in uncontrollable laughter.

Billy’s hand has found Homelander’s belly button and is drawing light circles around it before pushing his index finger in and wiggling it around. (“If you were poured out of a tube, how come you got this, love? Ah, maybe they made you with a belly button just so I can tickle you to pieces!") He’s now using both of his hands, moving up and down Homelander’s body, tickling him in two different places at the same time. (“Oh, you’re just loving this, aren’t you. You’ve been waiting for this. Trapped yourself, I bet.”)

Maybe it’s the teasing, maybe it’s Butcher’s relentless fingers, but Homelander finally breaks. He throws one last “Fuck you!” in Billy’s face before he dissolves into helpless giggles. He’s squirming and twisting, and Butcher is beginning to have trouble pinning him in place, but, hell, he’ll find a way just so he can keep listening to that sweet sweet laughter.

He bends down again until his face is uncomfortably close to the struggling, panting supe’s.

“This is going to be fun,” he whispers in his ear.

#TickleTober2022 #augtickletober2022 #butchlander #homelander #billy butcher #hi there I think I wrote the first Butchlander tickle fic?#tw: non-con #tw: dub-con #prompt no. 9: trapped #shameless tickle fic #don't hate me ok #butcher and homelander team-up AU #butcher and homelander are IN LOVE #pure unadulturated crack fic straight from my brain #no beta we die like the queen #my fics #maybe if he was a little less fuckable he wouldn't be in this mess #mine

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lamentationsofalonelypotato · 2 months

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You Call It Madness But I Call It Love

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary: When the reader left Payback 40 years ago after a falling out with her childhood best friend she never looked back, but when two men show up to her apartment and start asking her questions about the past, the reader begins to think those things can’t stay hidden and starts to question what’s real and what’s fantasy. This is a re-telling of The Boys Season 3, where the reader is a supe who's known Soldier Boy since 1927. The chapters fluctuate between past and present, beginning in 1934. SPOILERS FOR THE BOYS S3

Chapter 1: You Shouldn't Have Answered the Door

Chapter 2: Late Night Visitor

Chapter 3: Summer Has to End Someday

Chapter 4: It's My Party and I'll Eat Cake If I Want To

Chapter 5: The Man, The Myth, The Legend

Chapter 6: Batter Up

Chapter 7: Are We Old Friends Or Old Enemies?

Chapter 8: Jealousy Doesn't Look Good On Anybody Except...

Chapter 9: Wedding Bells or Gong of Destruction?

Chapter 10: How Did It End Up Like This?

Chapter 11: I Can't Think With You Yelling At Me!

Chapter 12: My Heart Is Beating For You Constantly

Chapter 13: You Made A Plaything Out of Romance

Chapter 14: You're All I'm Dreaming Of

Chapter 15: What Do You Know About Love?

Chapter 16: Coming Soon!

Last Updated: 04/28/2024

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If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series let me know :)

Taglist: @roseblue373 @anundyingfidelity @cheynovak @cassiecasluciluce @muhahaha303 @deans-spinster-witch @kayleighmeister @demodemo909 @fruitfacess @bobbobbobinogs @bughill126, @simplyfixated @sleepjam, @tiredstrangerr @freefallthoughts,@onlyangel-444 @lov3vivian @mxltifxnd0m @mayafatimakhan @marvel-mistress @my-obsession-spn @lifeonawhim @soldirboy @liuope @brynanna @abramswife @xxannyxx @babyinatrench-coat1 @the-gentle-spirit

(Photos on mood board from Pinterest)

#jensen ackles soldier boy #soldier boy x reader #soldier boy x you #soldier boy x female reader #the boys fanfic #the boys series #soldier boy #soldier boy fanfiction #the boys amazon #jensen ackles #soldier boy/ben #soldier boy fic #the boys season 3 #jackles #billy butcher #homelander #hughie campbell #the boys #You Call It Madness But I Call It Love

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darunyama · 8 months

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Homelander in his yandere era

#he's a total red flag but red is my favorite color (I'm not kidding)#do you smear your period on yourself too #he killed butcher because he didn't tell johnny he loved him so tragic #until now i never thought i'd come up with this while listening to love taste - moe shop #insane barbie #homelander #billy butcher #william butcher #butchlander #billy butcher x homelander #the boys

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charred-angelwings · 2 years

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#the boys #soldier boy #homelander #billy butcher #ryan aka baby homelander #look i like ryan and I feel for him i really do #and I liked the bonding he had with HL he needed it and homie did too #and i get that butcher loves him .in his own way i guess or something.lol.#but like #thE FUCK #come on #bigger picture here yall #not saying ryan should have died #but to deviate from the plan THAT FAST BECAUSE HE KNOCKED HIM DOWN??#he had a little gash hell be aight hes a fuckin supe #shit *I* felt betrayed #imo anyway

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aenslem · 1 year

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It's anger. That's a new one for me.

#theboysedit #the boys #antony starr #karl urban #billy butcher #homelander #butchlander #sd*#mine*#tvedit #chewieblog #userbbelcher #usertom #userteri #cinemapix #filmtv #the boys amazon #love how excited he is every time he meets william

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siren-and-faies-writing · 1 year

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Enraptured

Pairing: Homelander x reader

Summary: You’re the newest member of The Seven and Homelander takes an avid interest in you and your powers.

Type: Just a self indulgent thought I had about his superhuman hearing and smell

Disclaimer: Suggestive(?) Homelander is his own disclaimer LOL

You stared out the window of the high-rise building. New York City at night was a breathtaking view from the 99th floor of the Vought Tower and Ashley’s voice barely reached your ears as she spoke.

“You are JUST what this place needs! I mean hand picked by Starlight herself, the people are gonna love you!�� She said excitedly before reaching a set of double doors. “Here’s your apartment, get some rest. Big day tomorrow meeting the rest of the team!

You just smiled as the ginger women rushed off without so much as looking back. Entering the apartment, your still boxed belongings sat neatly stacked around the living area and you hummed quietly to yourself as you got to work unpacking. A reposeful little tune your mother had taught you as a child, something that always helped calm your nerves. Meeting the seven was sure to be quite an experience.

—

Homelander had just finished an interview, the only thing he seemed to do these days in his now mundane life- interview after interview about the same old thing… Edgar, Madelyn, Stormfront. Maybe a stroll around the city’s brisk night sky would help clear his troubled mind.

The supe flew about aimlessly, but when feelings he had been pushing aside demanded his attention, he suddenly felt like an overflowing wine glass that threatened to shatter at any moment. He was lost to his own thoughts, his anguish on the brink of consumption- until, in a blissful instant… it all stopped. Homelander’s mind hushed, an idyllic sensation washing over him, like a cloudy night sky resting peacefully over gently crashing waves.

That’s what it sounded like, the noise that had broke through his dejection. What was it? Without so much as a second though he bolted in the direction of the sound and was surprised when he ended up at Vought. Were they trying out some new auditory device? He wondered before entering the building, heedlessly pursuing the melody up to the 99th floor in his rapturous state; only stopping when the tips of his boots hit the hard surface of a door.

Here it is, just on the other side. Homelander didn’t even bother using his x-ray vision to peer inside, or knock for that matter. The doors slammed open as the supe let himself in, expecting a lab full of busying scientist, but was instead met with a women, shocked, staring back at him. “The Homelander… what a pleasure to finally meet you! Let me just say what an honor it is to be invited into the seven.”

The man cleared his throat with a nod. “The pleasure is uh… all mine.” He had trouble finding his words, unsure of what was going on but deciding to just play it cool. “I like to check up on new members before the official introductions. See what they’re all about- a test if you will.” He finally found his composure, neatly resting his hands behind his back. “Care to give me a little show?” He urged with a wave of his hand.

“Oh um… right. O-of course!” You said nervously, were you really about to use your powers on The Homelander!? You shut your eyes, taking a deep breath which came out shaky as you exhaled- despite your best efforts; a sound he took delight in. He cocked his head to the side, an amused smirk tugging at his lips, you just smiled in return as you made your way to rest against the bar counter. Making sure your eyes never left the older supe. He caught a sweet scent as you passed, Homelander lowered his head for a moment, nose twitching at the aroma, it made his head feel hazy. What the hell was going on with him?

His senses felt overwhelmed, and when he raised his head to recapturing your gaze- that was it. Homelander lunged towards you, like a predator pouncing on it’s prey. Gloved hands slammed against the counter top on either side of you, and you gasped quietly, but didn’t dare move. The man towered over you and you could feel his presence mere inches away- it took all your courage just to peer up at him. The expression you wore was captivating, doe like eyes staring back at him through long lashes, it ensnared him.

The gap between the two of you felt excruciatingly empty- so he filled it. Homelanders forehead met yours as he drank in your scent, his body pressed flush against you. It was only when a hand pressed gently to his chest that the man regained his own scenes.

“I… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to go that far, it was only a little bit I-I don’t know what happen I-” You stammered. “My powers… I can release pheromones that trigger a social response, or induce attraction, or sleep, or - ”

Induce attraction huh? So that was it. That’s why his mind felt hazy, that’s why his body moved on its own— but then why hasn’t he moved away from you? Surely you wasn’t using your powers on him anymore.

“B-But I only secreted a bit, I don’t know why it was so strong this time.”

Homelander knew why. It wasn’t you, it was him, his extraordinary sense of smell. His own powers worked against him, something he definitely wasn’t use to. But of course, he couldn’t tell you that. So what was he to say? That your powers had control over him?

No.

He finally stepped away from you, the lose of your presence leaving an empty pit in his chest. “Wow.” He breathed “Those are some powers huh? But hey! Don’t beat yourself up over what just happened.”

“Maybe- ” Homelander leaned down, you could practically hear the toothy grin he wore as he spoke. “It wasn’t all you.” He blew onto your ear, and a surprised squeak escaped your lungs; a treat to his ears.

“But I trust this stays between us hm?” A demand rather than a question. “Can’t have people thinking I play favorites now can I?” He sauntered over to the door, and only got halfway through before glancing back at your perplexed expression.

“We’ll get someone to fix that counter- ” You glanced back, pieces of marble crumbling to the floor. “Can’t wait to properly meet you tomorrow.” He winked before exiting your apartment.

—

Back in his penthouse, Homelander rest his head back against the couch, still feeling a bit dazed.

If pheromones were her power, then what was that melody he heard before?

— Siren

Haven’t written anything in forever but “The Boy” made me do it. I’m back and I have more Homelander ideas floating around 👀

Pt.2 anyone? 🤔

#I’ve been obsessed with the boys #I’ve binged it all week #I love this awful man #and daddy butcher #homelander x reader #homelander x you #the boys #the boys homelander #homelander the boys #homelander #billy butcher #butcher the boys

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mqnill · 2 months

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I hate Homelander x Billy Butcher. Like, no, Homelander maybe gay for him, idc, but Butcher had a freaking wife he really loved and who was taken away from him because of Homelander raping her. Ain't no way he wants him in any other ways except dead one. Nuh uh.

#the boys #the boys show #the boys series #homelander #billy butcher #i hate it so much #my god #noooooo #they are so not in love

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supemaeve · 2 months

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#the boys #queen maeve #homelander #william butcher #soldier boy #ryan butcher #ill probably regret this #I was just gonna gif her face #but I like this scene because it's basically the most powerful supes alive all together #and we had so few scenes of maeve actually getting involved in the fights that even this is something #and i love that look between maeve and butcher #even though I genuinely don't understand what those looks mean #I've gotten so much better at reading people's faces and emotions #But I swear i can't this time even though i've watched this 1000 times #i guess it has to do with not wanting to hurt ryan but yeah idk #yeah this became a rambling sorry #anyway #my gifs #maeve

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blindmagdalena · 4 months

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Christmas Traditions

1k gen fic featuring our favorite dysfunctional father & son. some themes of grief and slight codependency. inspired by the exchange in the comments of this ask.

Homelander tells Ryan that Santa's not real. It goes poorly.

“Hey, dad!” Ryan calls from the living room.

“Yeah, bud?” Homelander calls back, meticulously unraveling a nightmarish tangle of Christmas lights. If he’d had things his way, the decorating would have been done for them when the two of them returned to the penthouse.

Instead, Ryan had been insistent that they decorate together.

It’s tradition, he said. Homelander didn’t have the heart to refute him.

“You don’t have a chimney,” the boy declares from the doorway, standing with a stocking clutched in both hands. “I don’t have anywhere to hang my stocking.”

“Oh, uhhhh…” Homelander looks over his shoulder, eying the stocking warily. One of Ryan’s holdovers from his former home. Former prison, more like. “Go ahead and hang it on Atlas. What’s one stocking against the weight of the world?”

Ryan doesn’t seem to appreciate the joke. His expression is still pinched in concern.

Homelander frowns, setting the lights down. “What’s wrong, bud?”

“How’s Santa going to get in if you don’t have a chimney?” He asks very seriously, lightly twisting the stocking between his hands.

“Oh,” Homelander barks softly, breaking into a smile as he looks back to his task. “Aren’t you a little old for that?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know, the whole Santa thing?” When he looks back to his son, it still isn’t clicking. His brows furrow. “He’s not real, Ryan.”

Ryan grimaces like he’s been struck at, lifting his stocking to chest height like some sort of festive barrier. “Yes he is. Mom said so.”

Homelander blows a raspberry. Great, it’s going to be one of those conversations. “Yeah, well, your mom said a lot of things that weren’t true, didn’t she?” He stands from the table and makes his way over to the boy now scowling at him with hurt and confusion. “But hey, look at it this way: you don’t need Santa anymore. You’ve got me!” He says, arms splayed in invitation. “I don’t even need reindeer to fly! And neither do you, for that matter.”

Ryan doesn’t move. He’s still clutching that stocking to his chest. It looks handmade, the large R initial sloppily sewn in place. As much as he’d like to sneer at it, there’s a nagging jealousy in the back of his mind because the imperfections are how he knows it was made with love.

“Hey,” Homelander coaxes again, reaching out to give his shoulders a little squeeze. “C’mon, pal. Am I wrong?”

Still, Ryan doesn’t move. He doesn’t meet his father’s eye. Homelander can feel the mounting upset in the slight tremble of his shoulders, though.

“C’mon, little man,” he says, giving the gentlest shake. “Talk to me.”

“I killed Santa,” Ryan croaks out.

Homelander recoils in equal parts surprise and confusion. “What?”

“It’s my fault,” he says, clutching the stocking tightly to his chest, choking on each word as tears spill down his cheeks. “It’s my fault mom’s gone, and now Santa’s gone too. They’re gone and I killed them.”

Shit, shit, fuck, damn it, shit.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, back it up, kiddo,” he says, dropping into a kneel. “We’ve been over this, okay? What happened wasn’t–”

“It doesn’t matter!” Ryan interrupts mournfully. “It doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter if it isn’t, she’s still gone. And Santa’s not real because she’s gone.”

Homelander stares for a long moment, utterly at a loss. “I… I’m sorry.”

The dam breaks and Ryan sobs as he throws his arms around Homelander’s neck, muffling the wet noise of it into the collar of his suit. The sound of it is horrible not just for the sensory of it, but how each ragged breath tolls like a bell of failure. Father’s aren’t supposed to make their sons cry. They’re supposed to protect them. They’re supposed to make everything better.

Homelander lifts Ryan as though he’s much smaller than he is, cradling the crying boy to his chest and rubbing his back in soothing sweeps. “I’m sorry, bud,” he says, whispering it again and again and again. “I’m sorry.”

I’m still getting the hang of this, he nearly says, but he swallows it back. He wants Ryan to think of him the way a father should be seen. As if he knows what the fuck he’s doing. He continues to rub his back, comforting him through a loss that is both alien and painfully familiar to Homelander.

He never had a mother to lose, not really, but isn’t that a loss in and of itself? The pain of grief is a bitterness shared across all types of love. Even for the love you never had the chance to know. Even for the love that was a perversion of what could have been.

His own eyes burn with their shared grief. His son weeps in his arms like a very small child would, and Homelander hears the familiar sobs of his own childhood echoed in those same cries.

“It’s okay,” he says, clearing his throat, the catch of his voice humiliating to his own ears. “It’s okay, son. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. I’m here… I’m here.”

Maybe it’s a poor consolation–Ryan will always miss his mother–but it has to account for something, doesn’t it? He already has so much more than Homelander ever did. He understands Ryan better than anyone ever will, and vice-versa. Together, they can weather this storm.

Eventually, Ryan quiets. He could have cried for several more hours if he wanted. His fathers arms will never tire of his weight. He’s stronger than that, though; of course he is. They both are, Homelander tells himself.

“Can we still put out milk and cookies?” Ryan asks after a time, voice still half-muffled against Homelander’s suit.

“Yeah, bud,” he agrees readily, giving his boy a squeeze. He would agree to anything in the world right now. Arson, murder, robbery, a thirty-stack of pancakes, whatever the kid wanted. Homelander’s nerves feel as structurally sound as jell-o in the wake of his son’s tears. “We sure can.”

As Ryan would say, it’s tradition.

#i know christmas is over but i was too depressed to write so you get it late!!!!#anyways i'm sad about ryan and i love him #ryan butcher #homelander #homelander fanfiction #the boys fanfiction #my writing

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sharonisthebettercarter · 3 months

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honestly?

butcher and homelander fucking DESERVE each other they are so FUCKING AWFUL--

ryan needs a fucking restraining order

#homelander #the boys #billy butcher #butchlander #ryan butcher #damn animals #disgustingly entertaining evil old men #deliciously entertaining evil old men #i am totally fine and not obsessed or anything #i'm not sick #yes i am #but don't send help #toxic and i'm slipping under #seriously #i can't stand them #and i love them #need them #affectionate #derogatory

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witchyclispe · 4 months

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And when you cry at night...

I could be your superhero

Finally finished my Homelander drawing and Im so proud of it! Im normally very scared to draw fanart (out of fear of communities/ not getting the looks of a character right) but i feel like he came out super well!! I also have the speedpaint ready, which I'm most likely going to post on youtube in the upcoming days so look out!

Thank you to @anon-nee and @blindmagdalena for being my rocks during the entirety of this project!!

#digital art #art #artists on tumblr #original art #commisions open #artist #fanart #homelander fanart #the homelander #the boys #the boys amazon #the boys fanart #homelander the boys #anthony starr #superhero #hes my lil baby i love him SO MUCH #i will be drawing him again #but first a butcher drawing 👀

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xieyaohuan · 1 year

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Ravishing a god part 3

Fandom: The Boys

Pairing: Billy Butcher/Homelander

Summary: Homelander’s got himself trapped. Billy decides to take advantage. It's a good thing he’s definitely not attracted to the cunt.

Notes: There were no Butchlander tickle fics, so I wrote one!

Part 3 of 2 3 4 (definitively no more than 4 chapters)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4

Read on AO3

Warnings: non-con/VERY dub-con; canon-appropriate level of swearing; bondage; nsfw, explicit; self-indulgent bs straight from my brain

Cunt’s in a real sorry state, red-faced, panting and drenched in sweat. Billy gave him a good workout right there.

“Let’s clean you up a bit,” he decides.

He gently lifts Homelander’s head, pulls out the cape from underneath and starts drying his face, wiping away sweat and tears and probably a good amount of radioactive micro particles. Homelander winces at first, suspecting another attack but then calms down, and for a moment, Billy is almost certain the bastard’s actually leaning into the touch and sighing softly.

Fucking great, why does the cunt have to pull this affectionate shit on him all of a sudden, it makes no sense. Nothing about Homelander makes any sense. Or, if Billy is perfectly honest, how he himself has been handling this situation.

He should try and choke this arsehole, stab him, break his nose, see if he can inflict damage in some other way while the supe’s still in this weakened state. Not that it’s bloody likely to work or have any lasting effect, but he ought to at least try, right? Instead, he keeps wiping the sweat off of Homelander’s neck and chest and is rubbing his hair dry.

“Your turn,” he repeats once he’s done.

“Where’s your lair?” Homelander blurts out like he’s been itching to ask that question all day.

Billy bursts out laughing. “My what?”

“You know what I mean.” Homelander says. “Your, your headquarter… for you and your, uh, accomplices. Where is it?”

“In your mother’s vagina, that’s where our lair is.”

Homelander sighs and shakes his head in mock disapproval. “Now that’s the kind of answer that would have earned me a penalty, William.”

Billy can’t argue with that. “Know what, love? It still can.” He sits down on Homelander’s elbows, pressing them down with his knees. This supe can struggle and kick all he wants now, Billy is out of kicking range.

He launches a mock attack just to see if it works, and it does. He tries a second time, and it works again. Homelander lets out the most ridiculous yelp and tries to jump away before Billy’s fingers ever touch his skin.

“Don’t… don’t do that!” He snarls once he realizes that Butcher is toying with him.

“That’s fair,” Billy says, “don’t worry, I won’t do that no more.” He brushes the back of his hand over Homelander’s side. It’s the lightest of touches, but it manages to catch the supe off guard. He lets out another high-pitched shriek before coiling and twisting on the floor trying to pin the hand.

“You ever consider becoming a belly dancer, love?” Butcher teases, and Homelander curses him between bursts of involuntary laughter.

He eventually manages to draw his tied legs up and is trying to curl into a ball - except his arms are still pinned above his head, making it all quite useless.

Billy simply moves his hands up into the armpits, drawing light circles with his finger tips, prompting more desperate giggling and squirming.

“How-h-how much lo-lo-longer?” Homelander is craning his neck to catch a glimpse of Billy’s mobile because the wretched cunt somehow still believes that he is playing fair and is actually timing his torture.

“But I’m barely touching you,” Billy says, amused. “I’m actually thinking we should count this as a break.”

There is a soft red glow in Homelander’s eyes accompanying a particularly violent fit of giggles, but they only flicker briefly before they go out again. “Fuck you!”

“Tell you what,” Billy says, “if you can guess where our ‘lair’ is,” he’s making scare quotes with his eyes because his fingers are busy, “I’ll stop. And I’ll let you go. How does that sound?”

“Fuhuhucck youu!”

“Not today, love.” Billy’s grin widens, but he stops after just a few more minutes of cruel soft teasing.

Homelander draws in a sharp breath. Even with nothing but these light touches he’s somehow still managed to work up a sweat and run out of air.

Billy lets him catch his breath before he gets up and pushes his knees back down. The supe is suprisingly unresisting, letting Butcher uncurl him and spread him out without too much protest. Either he’s getting tired or it’s finally sinking in that there’s not much he can do. It’s only when Billy swings his leg over his knees and sits down on his thighs again that he tenses up and starts squirming and tugging at the pipe again.

Part of Billy wishes he could tie him up properly. He’s only been to Homelander’s bedroom once, and he’s got no plans to ever go there again, but the cunt does have a posh four poster bed that would be perfect for this kind of thing. Homelander’s wrists and ankles would look bloody exquisite in silver cuffs, and he just can’t help but think that being completely immobilized would be the perfect mindfuck for this supe who is so unaccustomed to being physically overpowered.

“Your turn,” Homelander says, jolting Billy from his thoughts, and he feels almost grateful for it. How the fuck is he sitting here daydreaming about tying up his nemesis in his bedroom in Vought Tower?

“When’s your birthday, love?”

“Now you’re just wasting a question, William,” Homelander says, snickering. “Everybody knows when my birthday is.”

“No, when’s your real birthday?” Billy laughs, but he knows the joke’s on him. He’s found a way to actually torture this cunt for information; he could make him spill all his secrets here and now, make him tell everything he knows. He should be asking about Vought and their illegal experimental drugs, their black sites, what other aces the fuckers got up their sleeves, yet here he is quizzing the cunt about his birthday. Fucking great, Billy Butcher, fucking great.

“Why do you even care?” Homelander snaps.

He didn’t expect the supe to get all defensive about this one. Billy resists the urge to go for another hipbone squeeze. This could be interesting. “Maybe I wanna send you flowers,” he says.

Homelander sighs and starts biting his lip. There’s a look in his eyes Billy hasn’t seen before. “Can we just skip this one?” It’s clear he’s expecting no mercy though; every muscle in his body has tensed up and he’s turning his face away, squinting his eyes, waiting for the inevitable.

Cunt doesn’t know his own fucking birthday, Butcher realizes, and somehow it hits him like a train. Vought must have the records but clearly never felt the need to let him know. Did he never ask? Or is this simply not a conversation he would have with his corporate owners? No doubt Billy could make Homelander admit he doesn’t know, but that just feels like partaking in these soulless corporate fuckers’ mindless cruelty. He might as well start buying Vought stock and publicly commending the company for its A+ sentient product management.

“Yeah yeah yeah,” he says. “I get it. You don’t like flowers. Suit yourself. But I get an extra question now.”

“Whatever,” Homelander says, but he actually sounds relieved.

“Alright.” Billy thinks for a moment. He’s got to make this one count. “What crimes did you commit this week? Murder anyone in cold blood? Broke the Geneva Conventions?”

Clearly, he’s not going to learn much about Vought today because for better or for worse his brain has decided it would rather know more about the twisted cunt he’s working with, but at least he’s going to get a confession on video. That’s got to count for something, right?

“I don’t commit crimes and I don’t-” Homelander starts, but Billy cuts him off right then and there. That hypersensitive patch of skin right above his atrocious red briefs has been practically begging for his undivided attention. He is scribbling his fingers from left to right and right to left, and the spot does not disappoint.

“DON’T! DON’T!!” The cunt’s eyes light up again, and Billy can feel the heat this time. Homelander is trying to tense his muscles, but it’s plain he’s about to turn into jelly.

“Who’d we murder this week? Hmm?” Butcher repeats. “And, please, tell me something I don’t already know,” he adds quickly. He really doesn’t need to hear again that Homelander killed a man at a rally; it’s been all over the press, and he’s already given the psychotic cunt a piece of his mind for killing in front of Ryan.

“STOP!!! I can’t FUCKING think!”

Billy laughs. “Too many to choose from, eh?” He says, but he actually pauses. “Tell you what. You’ve got ten seconds.” Just to drive the point home, he starts counting down.

“Wait!” Homelander wails. “Wait, wait! I need more time!”

“Nah. You’re stalling.” Billy plunges both hands back down, digging all ten fingers into that smooth flat belly, and the reaction is fucking mindblowing.

Temp V’s a real bitch, but Butcher’s glad he’s got it running through his veins right now. Otherwise, he’s not sure he could hold down Homelander, that’s how violently he’s bucking and thrashing now.

“STOPSTOPSTOP I CAN’T. WILLIAM! PLEASE!!” Homelander is banging his head on the floor, and just watching him is giving Billy a headache. “I DIDN’T KILL ANYONE OKAY! PLEASE! I SWEAR I SWEAR!”

“Did you really just say please?” Billy asks with mock surprise but without stopping. “Fuck, I think you meant it! Say it again!”

He’s fully expecting Homelander to press his lips shut and at least make an effort to regain some sort of dignity, but he’s dead wrong about that.

The bloody supe’s begging without any shame or reservation now, pleading with him to stop please stop, promising to be better, to be good, to do whatever Billy wants if only he could please please please stop.

Some people get less sensitive over time, but with Homelander, it seems to be just the opposite. The longer Butcher’s hands linger on a spot, the more the supe is reduced to a quivering bundle of nerves.

The laser hitting Billy’s chest with every particularly violent fit of laughter is beginning to sting, but he isn’t ready to call it a day just yet. He’s still got too much Temp V in his system so the cunt can’t actually melt his skin, but the same cannot be said for his clothes. Billy looks at the growing scorch marks on his leather jacket and sighs.

“Oi! You’re ruining my clothes, love. Cut it out for fuck’s sake will ya.”

“I CAN’T-” Homelander’s eyes are still glowing, but he is actually crying now, tears of laughter streaming down his face. “I CAN’T… IT'S NOT... I’M NOT… NO NO PLEASE! PLEHEAHEASE STOP!”

Having Homelander so completely at his mercy is giving Billy a rush. He’s wondering if the bloody supe has enough of his powers back yet to read his vitals and knows how much hearing him plead like this excites him. Who’s he kidding though, Homelander doesn’t need super powers to figure out what a pair of regular human eyes can see clearly enough.

He’s not the only one, Billy realizes with mixed feelings. Cunt may be begging and crying for mercy, but his body is telling a different story.

“WHY DO YOU ENJOY TORTURING ME” Homelander screams, and Billy slows down the pace just a little. It’s still enough to leave the supe squirming and disoriented.

“Easy,” he says. “Because you’re loving it. You should see yourself right now.”

The cunt’s throbbing erection is visible through the red cloth just fine, but just to make his point, he pulls down Homelander’s briefs. “Beautiful, that.”

Homelander actually looks embarrassed, turning his head to avoid having to look Billy into the eye. “You’re not one to talk,” he mumbles.

Billy suddenly remembers he’ll be able to rewatch, relive this moment as many times as he wants, and fuck it, this clip’s not gonna be admissible in a court of law no matter what he does now, so he might as well go all out.

He wraps his hand around Homelander’s cock and is about to give it a few strokes when there’s a flash and a loud bang right behind him.

He turns around, and through the dust, he can see the Vought cunts moving in, guns drawn, jumpy, trigger-happy as usual, not that they can actually do much with guns at a supe fight. Butcher sighs. Why do these cunts always have to be so fucking dramatic?

When they see it’s just Homelander and Billy, they lower their weapons, but they’re still staring, all ten of them, like they’ve never seen a man with his hand wrapped around another man’s dick before. Or, well, a sweat-drenched panting naked supe with his hands wrapped in a pipe pinned above his head.

Said supe looks surprisingly unfazed if a tad annoyed as he turns his head towards the Vought men. “Yes? What is it now?”

#tickletober2022 #augtickletober2022 #butchlander #homelander #billy butcher #tw: dub con #shameless tickle fic #butcher and homelander team-up AU #butcher and homelander are IN LOVE #MADLY so #no beta fuck that #pure unadulturated crack fic straight from my brain #maybe if he was a little less fuckable he wouldn't be in this mess

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tapeworrmart · 4 months

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Angry and scruffy

#Figuring him out. He's fucking hard to draw!!! But I wanna draw him w his powers #And I also wanna draw him and homelander 👀#Tbh mate I'd be angry all the time if my hair was that much of a mess too #As a brit I can say Karl Urbans accent is hilarious to me and my whole family we find it endearingly bad #At least it isn't American bleeding through that sounds worse. He gets a pass to sound like Michael Caine sometimes I think. I'll let him.#Anyway by the way I love him. I love Billy Butcher with all my stupid gay heart. Don't even doubt that #The boys #the boys amazon #The boys butcher #Billy Butcher #William butcher #fan art #art #sketch #character art

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zepskies · 5 months

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Why We Love the Boys

As promised, here is my review of Supes Ain’t Always Heroes. I actually used to write book reviews in my high school journalism days, so here we go!

What this book is: A masterful deep dive. A study on character psychology, the source of the comic and show’s inspiration, and the narrative themes illustrated in The Boys that parallel American culture and our real lives.

It includes interviews from one of the comic’s creators, Darick Robertson, The Krip himself (Eric Kripke), and actors Jim Beaver (Robert Singer), Aya Cash (Stormfront), Chace Crawford (The Deep), Jessie T. Usher (A-Train), Nathan Mitchell (Black Noir), and of course, Jensen Ackles (Soldier Boy).

It also includes a small but significant ode to the creativity of fans and fandom (with a mention of fanfic writers)!

I’ll admit, I felt seen. 😊

Who wrote it: Psychologists Lynn S. Zubernis and Matthew Snyder. Zubernis is a self-proclaimed fangirl of not only this show, but Supernatural and Eric Kripke in general. (That aspect definitely comes through in her writing.)

She is also editor of Family Don’t End with Blood: Cast and Fans on How Supernatural Changes Lives and There’ll Be Peace When you Are Done: Actors and Fans Celebrate the Legacy of Supernatural. Both of which I now want to read.

Several other authors also contributed to this book, as their expertise and backgrounds lend to the subjects they’re covering, such as racism, sexism, the entertainment industry, the comic’s inception, and more.

Who wants to read this book: Anyone who enjoys learning about what makes characters tick. What drives their choices, their sense of morality and justice, and their trauma and strife that lead them to do heinous things. This book will help you better understand your favorite characters (and how to write about them).

Perhaps most importantly, this book is for anyone who wants to read it put into words, why many of us love The Boys, as well as Supernatural.

In a way, the latter is more escapism entertainment than The Boys. Because in this show, there isn’t much, if any escape.

Despite this being a “superhero show,” as we all know, it’s so much more than that. It’s a mirror held directly into our own faces: about why we enjoy heroes and antiheroes, and excuse the “bad behavior” of the ones we like.

About mental health, grief and loss, nature and nurture, coping mechanisms and the importance of choice in dealing with trauma; of racism, sexism, misogyny, weaponized social media, politics, corporate greed, and the power (and cruelty) of good marketing.

This book explores the true villain of the story (and it ain’t Homelander).

I’m going to get into my favorite aspects of this book—as well as an amazing chapter on Soldier Boy’s character study (and why we love him, perhaps too much).

Though in my opinion, it was missing one small, but key thing…

The Mirror of The Boys on Screen

This world is a gritty, bloody, and at times all-too realistic take on how superheroes would be if they lived in our world.

They are the worst of celebrities, professional athletes, and politicians all rolled into one. They are the shiny products of a company and are marketed as such. And they often buy into their own hype.

Some of my favorite quotes on this topic:

“The Boys often reflects darkness in our real world that is uncomfortable to watch. While we go through the tedium of our daily lives, trying to get by and using television or comics as an escape, it can feel difficult and overwhelming to confront the very real and insidious sources of authoritarianism, nationalism, and corporatism that are not just part of a story. “This show holds up a mirror and forces us to catch a glimpse of things we need to question, and asks us why we so easily believe the talking points of systems with marketing departments and press flacks behind them that carefully massage every word in order to get us to feel enamored with their product or policy.” (p. 227-228)

“The Boys works to reveal the nonaltruistic, sociopathic nature of contemporary US corporate culture. In a sense, The Boys uses the behavior of its characters to diagnose not an individual, but a culture.” (255)

In studying narrative I’ve learned that the best fiction and art serve to reflect the human experience. In this case, it’s something The Boys does expertly, even though it’s packaged in extreme, shocking, and often uncomfortable ways. But also in brutal, hilarious satire that’s fun to watch.

It “exposes real-world abuses, revealing many” of our own frustrations in American culture and in life in general (267).

Major Themes & Questions Explored

Several Boys themes are explored from a psychological, cultural, and narrative point of view, as I mentioned earlier. These are some of my favorite segments:

Toxic Masculinity & Narcissism

A whopper in The Boys, and the main theme of season 3. This book defines clearly what both of these words actually mean from a psychological point of view.

It also takes the bad taste out of your mouth that you might get from just hearing the words “toxic masculinity,” as it’s a phrase that can be carelessly thrown around to describe men and character traits that aren’t truly toxic.

How being emotionally available to your loved ones and not repressive of your feelings doesn’t make you weak, or less of a man. And how “being strong” doesn’t mean being physically violent and domineering. (AKA: the Big Swinging Dick™️ in the room.)

Narcissism is explored in a very interesting way. The book gives a diagram of different aspects of narcissists and how each character (Soldier Boy, Homelander, Butcher, and the Deep) falls into them.

Soldier Boy, for example, is classified as a “Classic Narcissist,” while Homelander a “Malignant Narcissist.” <- This will play into SB’s character study, and the main difference between SB and Homelander.

Butcher, however, displays narcissistic tendencies but is not, in fact, a narcissist. (More of an antisocial sociopath. Yay for him.)

Misogyny & Sexism

The classic superhero world of comics dates back to the 1930s and ‘40s. It has been, and in many respects still is a (White) male-dominated industry, where in narrative, female superheroes typically work under a male leading the team, as in Justice League, Teen Titans, and the Avengers.

As much as I love DC and Marvel comics, female characters have also been drawn wildly sexual for male readers and the male gaze, and non-supe characters have been written primarily as love interests and damsels for the hero to save. (Think Lois Lane, Lana Lang, and Mary Jane.)

Modern adaptions have given female characters more agency, but their foundations were rooted in underlying sexism and the mythic hero—an Odysseus-type with certain characteristics of male strength and heroism. And that goes all the way back to classic literature, like The Odyssey, Beowulf, and the Epic of Gilgamesh.

In The Boys, the female supes go through the same issues as their comic counterparts. And they are treated how women are treated in the real world—marketable as sexual objects. (Starlight’s forced costume change is a prime example.)

Author Danielle Turchiano argues in the book that the women in power at Vought (Madelyn Stillwell, later Ashley) are given only so much power as men like Stan Edgar and Homelander give to them.

Stillwell, Ashley, and even Stormfront “drink the Kool Aid” of the misogynistic infrastructure of Vought, but they’re not truly “powerful” in and of themselves. (112)

And I would add that the only female characters that have or find true agency are Grace Mallory, Annie January/Starlight, and Maggie Shaw/Queen Maeve. Even Victoria Neuman is trying to work the political schematic and Vought by operating “within the system” Vought has created.

Mental Health, Trauma & Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

This is a huge section, and rightly so. It kind of spans throughout the book, really, because all of these characters have traumas that inform who they are as adults making the (often grotesque) choices they make.

For many of these characters, it stems from their upbringing and fraught relationships with their parents, whether explicitly or implicitly explored in the show.

Butcher: Is an antisocial sociopath with narcissistic tendencies. Arrogant, emotionally manipulative, violent, and obsessive. He was also physically and emotionally abused by his father, led to use drinking and violence as a means to cope and express himself. His rage is so deep under his skin—he loathes himself for it (and his father), but struggles immensely to escape it.

Homelander: A malignant narcissist, the height of arrogance, and emotionally manipulative. He lacks empathy for others' pain, and in fact enjoys inflicting it. Yet he was a sensitive, gentle child who only wanted connection and love. Vogelbaum raised him like a lab rat and fostered him in a cold, detached cell. He was raised to be entitled and to believe he was an all-powerful god, the lord of his own kingdom within his mind, excused from the responsibility of his actions.

Soldier Boy: Also a narcissist; violent, arrogant, misogynistic, and often indifferent to the damage he causes, emotional or physical. Yet he was also emotionally abused by his father, who set impossible standards for what it meant to be a man. It drives Ben to try and prove his worth to his father, though he’s never able to. It fosters the lack of self-worth he feels as he seeks validation through fame and what he believes power to be.

These three characters have many similarities, but also notable differences that set them apart from one another. And both Butcher and Soldier Boy use substances like drugs and alcohol to cope with their traumas—ones that their forced stoicism and sense of manhood won’t allow them to easily express.

“We see Soldier Boy use substances almost continuously in season three to deal with his PTSD from the childhood emotional abuse he received from his father, the betrayal and assault from his team, and the torture he endured from the Russian scientists.

“In the short term, the use of drugs and alcohol to avoid thoughts and feelings about traumatic experiences can be felt as helpful, but in the long term, it hinders one’s ability to process emotions and can cause a deeper depression from the guilt and shame of both avoidance and substance abuse.” (27)

Heroes, Antiheroes & Villains

This book explores two key questions that the show encourages you to think about:

Who the hell is the hero of this story?

And who is the villain?

The surface-level answer is that Homelander and other supes like him are the villains, and Butcher and his band of bros are the heroes (or antiheroes). But they commit just as questionable, sketchy, and downright murderous acts as the supes they’re trying to take down.

“Butcher is not really a good guy. He’s manipulative and self-centered. His reasons for wanting to take down Homelander are utterly personal. That it serves the greater good is almost a coincidence.” (9)

And if Butcher is not a hero, but a vengeful vigilante, then why do we root for him so much?

Well, we see his incredible flaws. But I sympathize with his struggle in losing his wife and the life he could've continued to have with her. I root for the underdog going against the hydra head of Vought and the psychopathic Homelander.

And I see in Butcher, as I also do with Homelander and Soldier Boy, their traumas and their internal conflicts, their deep-rooted self-loathing, and a desire, deep, deep down…to be loved.

(And to foster connection with others, even if they’re unable to sustain them.)

On the flipside, we have antagonists in this show who do truly heinous things. What makes them compelling and even sympathetic, yet again, are their painful upbringings that have shaped them to be who they are. The supes of this show are byproducts of being treated like products.

Like the saying goes: Villains aren’t born, they’re made.

That’s why the real villain of this story is Vought International. It’s an allegory, and an indictment of the ruthless corporate greed that pervades American culture—and much of the world.

It’s why Stan Edgar is sometimes scarier to me than even Homelander (and was the true villain of my story, Break Me Down), if far more insidious.

Speaking of BMD, let’s get to it, shall we?

Here’s a (lot) bit about the Soldier Boy section of the book.

Soldier Boy: Why We Can’t Hate Him

I had to laugh out loud at the title of Soldier Boy’s chapter:

Loving the Villain: The Confusing Case of Soldier Boy

I’m not gonna lie. I felt called out. 😂

It is a confusing dichotomy. Soldier Boy is an absolute asshole. Misogynistic, narcissistic, arrogant, callous, violent…

But also deeply traumatized, a man-out-of-time, emotionally abused, byproduct of the historically and culturally different time he was raised in, a man who just doesn’t get it…

And also charming, adorably grumpy, and undoubtedly attractive.

It’s hard to indict “Ben” as an unredeemable villain in the same way I do Homelander, the psychologist-labelled Malignant Narcissist.

Therein lies the main difference between Soldier Boy and Homelander: Soldier Boy doesn’t take joy in harming others the way Homelander does. But he still harms people, whether he means to or not.

Zubernis confirms many of my own conclusions and ideas about Soldier Boy, and why I still rooted for him to be better, and didn’t want him to die at the end of season 3.

As Zubernis rightly exclaimed during her own watch of the finale: “Noooo, don’t kill the Danger Grandpa Baby Murder Kitten!” (175)

Because Jensen did what he does best in his roles: He made us feel Ben’s pain.

“What’s funny is, in regard to Jensen playing Soldier Boy, you know he’s fucking fantastic, he’s just so good at bringing the audience, and it’s almost like—what I laugh about is, he was probably a little too good at his job!” Kripke said. (180)

And he continues, “In part it’s because of the fandom. So many people took his side in the finale, they’re like, Were’s on his side, fuck everyone! And you’re like, but he’s the bad guy and he’s trying to kill a ten-year-old.”

Were there fans who held this viewpoint? I’m sure. There are some radicals who don’t give a fuck and will side with their favorite character, come whatever. But while I can’t speak for others, that’s not how I interpreted that moment in the season 3 finale.

Yes, I think Soldier Boy was (wrongfully) willing to fight Ryan. Do I think he would’ve killed him? I’m not sure. I think he would’ve done what he had to do to get Ryan out of his way in his fight with Homelander. Maybe he would’ve been more violent than he intended, in the callous collateral damage he’d shown throughout the season, or maybe he would’ve gone that far, if provoked.

It’s a tough call, as I think this character can go one way or the other in terms of his “villain” nature. We just haven’t seen enough of him in the series yet for me to make that conclusion on the canon-version of Soldier Boy. (In fanfic, I’ve explored my own interpretation.)

But overall, I think The Krip once again underestimated the power of Jensen’s acting.

…And the ardent nature of his mostly female fanbase. 😂

Why We Love Soldier Boy

The author cites multiple reasons for why we love Ben more than we probably should:

It’s Jensen Ackles. Fair enough. His talent speaks for itself.

Soldier Boy’s backstory: He was emotionally abused by his father and as a result, he has a complex regarding his self-worth, “something to prove,” and a secret need for attention, validation, and praise.

He has trauma and PTSD: He is displaced from what is familiar to him and confused when the boys find him, and that is the least of it. He’s been tortured for 40 years. Can you even conceive of that?

He’s charming: in a sexy grandpa, adorably grumpy, lovable asshole kind of way.

We’re drawn to danger: dangerous “edgy” types are fun, especially when you’re physically attracted to the character.

He has his moments of vulnerability: Jensen’s ability to play the nuance in the character is the ultimate draw. I felt his pain, could see his torture, and his resulting PTSD. He longs for a family, even if his ability to bring up those children is questionable at best. 😅

But I think the one aspect the author doesn’t consider is the character’s capacity for change.

Soldier Boy’s Potential

Again, I don’t think you can write off Soldier Boy’s potential for positive character development the same way you can Homelander, or even Butcher.

For one thing, we just haven’t spent enough time with the character. A lot of his collateral damage after he escapes imprisonment has been accidental, or PTSD-induced. Though we can’t discount how he murdered M.M.’s grandfather via collateral damage (and was callous about it).

I think this is what drew me to write about Soldier Boy. “For all his arrogance, his chauvinism, his massive ego and general bastardry, there’s still humanity in Ben.”

In the book, Nathan Mitchell also says something amazing about his own character (Black Noir) that resonated with me about Soldier Boy as well:

"One of the ingredients of a compelling character is contradiction. How does one aspect of our personality contradict with one another? [...] Who is he underneath? How might his true nature contrast with the demands of his job?"

Or coded for Soldier Boy/Ben: The pressures he puts on himself to be the type of man he thought his father wanted him to be.

Again, his sexist, misogynistic ideals are shaped by the time he was raised in, by being a product of Vought, and of his father’s emotionally abusive upbringing. Does this excuse or justify all of his behavior? Of course not.

But I think those 40 years in captivity changed him from the careless alpha dog we saw in 1984 Nicaragua…

He admits to Crimson Countess, with tears in his eyes, that he’d loved her. That he waited for her and his team—arguably the only social system he has in his life—to save him. He’s gutted to realize that not only did she and the rest of the team never love him, they hated him. They traded him for nothing. Just to get him out of their lives.

For all he claims to be afraid of nothing, tough as shit, he is afraid when he goes to face Mindstorm. He knows what the supe is capable of, and he visibly takes a shaky breath and tries to steel himself.

For a moment, he drops the “Soldier Boy” persona that he wears like a fine tailored suit. And he tells Butcher that the backstory Vought created for him was a lie; he grew up a rich kid who got sent to boarding school, but flunked out, because "he was a fuck up." And his father couldn’t be bothered to discipline him, implying he didn’t care enough about his own son to even lay a hand on him.

He is reluctant to kill Homelander when he finds out he’s Ben’s son (sort of). He even claims that he would’ve been willing to share the spotlight “with his own son.” — Something I doubt even Homelander would do.

Ben even seems to be fighting tears when he levies the same vitriol at Homelander that his own father did at him:

Homelander: “Weak? I’m you.”

Soldier Boy: “I know. You’re a fucking disappointment.”

Let me be clear. I don’t think it’s up to someone to change him (like a love interest). I don’t subscribe to that thinking, that a woman can “change” a man.

For example: In season 2, Butcher tells Becca, “Who was I before you? Nothing.”

And yet, she tells him that he put her on an unrealistic and unsustainable pedestal, in which she felt like she wasn’t allowed to fully be herself, unable to keep him from flying off the handle in rage. That kind of relationship (where one is dependent on the other to “keep them in check”) doesn’t work as a lasting, satisfying redemption arc, and it doesn’t work in real life either.

I do think, however, that a person is capable of change if they’re broken down enough (pun intended), and if they themselves have a desire to change. Someone they encounter can inspire them to be better, like Butcher with Hughie. That person can help support the other.

At the end of the day, however, it’s Ben that has to want to change.

If he wants love and connection, he’ll have to somehow want it, and try (and sometimes fail) to get it, thereby giving him agency and a redemptive character arc.

Now, obviously, it’s up to The Krip where Ben goes from here. He seems to have a more indicting vision of the character than I do (at least, so far). But we’ll see! The fan demand to bring back the character has already had Kripke confirming that Soldier Boy will be back.

Maybe it will encourage him to give the character a more satisfying ending than Dean Winchester got in Supernatural. Though granted, that one wasn’t his doing, apparently he was in favor of the ending the writers came up with.

Comparing Dean & Ben

In his interview segment, Jensen talks about what, if any, are the comparisons between Dean Winchester and Soldier Boy. AKA: Wanting a father’s approval, and an undercurrent of “John Wayne”-esque masculinity in John Winchester that Dean sought to emulate.

Jensen also talks about where he drew from to not only embody the character of Soldier Boy, but bring nuance to him—and show the peeks of vulnerability under the bravado and stoicism.

“He’s so fragile and his ego is fragile. Just like Homelander. These bigger-than-life powerful heroes really have a glass jaw… “And everyone walks on eggshells around him [Soldier Boy], and they tell him that they love him, and it’s the same with Homelander. Then when all of a sudden he faces his old team and Crimson Countess says we never loved you, we hated you—that’s a gut punch for him. Because even though on some level he may have known that, he never thought he would hear it. “And he probably propped himself up around trying to believe otherwise, because how can you walk around knowing everyone you’ve ever cared about hates you? It’s too painful.” (191)

It really is. And I inherently felt this about Soldier Boy/Ben when I watched season 3 for the first time. That’s exactly what I got from his performance and thought, there’s more to this guy than the toxic masculinity he represents.

This guy just wants to be loved, like everyone else. He wants to feel important, and even after his father’s dead, “show him” that Ben is the man his father wanted him to be. And so, he bought into the illusion Vought painstakingly crafted for him.

Whether he can come back from that remains to be seen. But I choose to be optimistic until evidence points to the contrary. 😅 (We’ll see in season 4!)

So that’s my personal take on Soldier Boy and this awesome book. 💚 Thank you again @kaleldobrev for recommending it to me! I hope you all enjoyed my long-winded review and want to check this out.

And if you do read it, I hope to read your thoughts as well!

Tagging people who said they wanted to read my review on this book: @venus-haze @jessjad @kristophalis @sl33pylilbunny

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