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shaunamilfman · 1 month

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It’s been so long since I’ve sent an ask in, i fear the kids will think we’re in a divorce. So today I came to offer up a situation I believe in 1000%.

Jackie Taylor in college not knowing how to flirt with women, so whenever she meets you for the first time she doesn’t know how to talk to you. She ends up buying those stupid men’s pickup artist CDs, the like late 2000s type. She believes it completely and thinks that this is how you get girls and buys like the whole box set. It comes with douche clothes, a small notebook of pickup lines and a huge textbook along with like 10 CDs. Literally any normal person would know these lines and tactics would absolutely not work, but she’s convinced herself. So she tries approaching you in a bar and when you don’t follow the script that the pickup artist said you’d respond with, she gets nervous. She pulls out and skims through the pages of a huge book that in VERY bold letters on the front reads, ‘HOW TO GET WOMEN’

She eventually gives up on the textbook after she sees the weird look you gave her upon seeing it. Just ends up taking a bar napkin and writing “Do you like me?” With 2 options below that read “Yes” and “YES”. She’s looking at you like she’s so proud of herself that you cant help but circle the option in all caps. (She thinks that means you’re dating, immediately)

excellent ask as always bro. feels like we haven't spoken in soooo long. waiting by the window for my husband to come home from war. checking the post office every day for one mere letter from the front lines 😔

the way that little book is the only thing jackie's taking notes on before she got to college. she bombed her first exam and is like "omg how do you study in college???" and then looked at her 10 pages of notes from "chicks 101" and a lightbulb lit up

jackie has the best pickup lines written down and her phone and keeps checking the notes app as shes walking towards you (walks into a pole). forgets them immediately the second she starts talking to you (you talked first and she forgot what she crammed) but refuses to admit it and tries it anyways. completely flips the line around. like "you're the only ten i see, are you from tennessee?" and immediately winces.

screams into her pillow atleast once a week. did not realize that flirting with girls would be so fucking hard. no one tells you this thing. she almost misses when she thought she was straight. the shit was soooo easy. she's so good at flirting with boys that she's still pulling them without even trying.

also jackie for fucking sure memorizes how she wants conversations to go in general when she's nervous about something i feel and the second someone goes off script she's like "hold on now". has to schedule a doctors appointment for the first time and they ask her a question she didn't have written down and she hangs up (they needed her middle name. she makes shauna call them from rhode island lmaoo.).

peering over jackie's shoulder and she's got 20 tabs open all along the lines of "how to kiss", "how to tell her i like her", "how to flirt with women when you look straight", "how to be her friend in a gay way", "lesbian. girl pretty. help"

jackie does NOT believe in situationships. what do you mean you're not in love with her??? you went on three dates?? she secretly sprayed her perfume on your pillow when you were in the bathroom and everything. yahoo answers swore it would make you fall in love with her

side note jackie immediately hard launches you after one date. queen. writing mrs jackie taylor in all her notebooks for sure. calling shauna up like "i found the one" and shaunas like "...where is she from?". "unimportant. anyways so on our date..."

you see a no faintly written under a shit ton of eraser marks before she changed her mind and wrote another yes. (was nervous about giving you the option lmaooo)

#jackie thoughts 🩷#jackie taylor x reader #yellowjackets x you #yellowjackets x reader #soffsh

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elysia-nsimp · 4 months

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Yknow being a disabled person that doesn’t look disabled is. weird. I didn’t even know I was disabled until a little less than a year ago, and knowing this information has changed me. I realized I was putting SOOO much strain on myself for absolutely no reason and i finally had an explanation as to why I couldn’t function like everyone else

People always thought it was weird that I couldn’t shower, couldn’t take care of my hair (despite it being very long and me refusing to cut it), couldnt stand for long periods of time without complaining… not to mention the autism, causing me to have meltdown when it was lightly sprinkling outside and stuff. I just felt… different /neg

THEN I found out I was DISABLED and suddenly things just clicked. I can’t stand because my joints don’t work properly and I can’t stand up without feeling dizzy because I have POTS. I can’t shower both because of the distain for water AND because I CANT STAND for long periods of time! I finally had answers and… no one believed me.

“Oh but you don’t look disabled” SHut up SHUT. up. Disability doesn’t have a “look.” Anyone can be disabled, you can’t sniff that shit out by appearance alone. Hell, even the first doctor I went to was like “nooo you can’t have POTS it’s just anemia” and my parents were like “the DOCTOR said this so you have to believe that,” despite me KNOWING it wasn’t right. I got angry and took it into my own hands, did my own tests, following what the doctor said the test criteria for POTS was, then showed my main doctor what I found. She was like “…Yeah the first doctor didn’t know what she was talking about, that’s definitely POTS.” and gave me some tips on how to make it less of an issue. (Haha I was right and you were wroooong Doctor)

Anyway point is. Believe disabled people. Even if they don’t look disabled. Even if some of the things the disability causes are kinda gross and make you maybe think they’re just lazy. Lazy is a CONCEPT that doesn’t exist. There’s always something else at play—depression, disability, autism, lack of motivation, some necessary components is missing for them to do the thing… literally even if they just don’t WANNA, there’s a reason for that. Lazy is a stupid concept and should be not used against disabled and mentally ill people.

#eely rambles #actually disabled

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lunajay33 · 1 year

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My Gally

Summary: After seeing Gally die it broke you and then you found out you were pregnant while you were on the run

“No please don’t leave me Gally I need you” I cried as I felt him die in my arms

“I love you” he breathed out one last time

“I love you too Gally, so much” that’s when I felt arms around me, dragging me away

I screamed wanting to just stay with Gally forever, they threw me into a helicopter with the others

“Y/n I’m so sorry” Minho said

“Why would you do that, if you let me talk him down he wouldn’t have done anything” I cried as I felt newt wrap his arms around me

“Im sorry”

~~~~~~~~

Months later

~~~~~~~~~

It’s been about 6 months now and I found out that I was pregnant when we got to the hide out in the mountains, after the doctor their tested all our blood

But after WICKD came and destroyed the safe haven we were on the move again to save Minho, they didn’t want me to go but where else would I go they are my family

We found our way to the city surrounding WICKD headquarters

“Y/n are you sure about being here, we could find an abandoned house and you can stay there” newt stated

“Umm im not sure I’ll be able to keep up with you guys so maybe we can find a place for me tonight! If that’s okay guys”

“It’s more than okay! You need rest after all!” Thomas smiled

Through this whole pregnancy they have treated me amazing, they were trying to fill in the role of Gally which didn’t make me feel so alone

A few trucks drove through the crowd and we followed it until it stopped infront of the WICKD wall

That’s when the guns went off, quickly shooting closer and closer to us, Thomas took my hand and we ran but god did it hurt, running while being 6 months pregnant with a huge belly wasn’t a really good idea

Thankfully we got out of the way by hiding behind a wall but that’s when another truck pulled up, throwing Thomas and the others inside but they were gentle with me thankfully

Two guards sat their watching us, my nerves where through the roof, I was scared for my life and my baby this was the only piece of Gally I had left

The truck came to a stop and everyone was thrown out except me, I got out on my own

“What the hell is this? Who are you?” Thomas yelled angry

The guy turned to us and slowly took off his mask and what I saw almost made me faint

“Gally? How are you alive?” Newt asked confused just like the rest of us

I slowly walked forward not caring what the others were talking about, I stood in front of him placing my hands on his face

“My love, oh god I cant believe it’s you” I cried holding him just wanting to be close to him

He wrapped his arms around me

“I looked everywhere for you” he said as he stepped back wiping my tears away

“I missed you so much Gally, we missed you” i smiled rubbing my belly bump

He looked down, his eyes shot open

“It’s mine?”

“Of course it’s yours, you’re the only one ive ever been with you know that” I whispered

“I cant believe it, how far along?”

“6 months, it hurt when I found out that you wouldn’t ever meet them, that I’d be alone, but knowing that I’d have a little baby Gally changed everything”

“Im here with you now, both of you forever” he smiled pulling me into a long passionate kiss

#tmr fanfiction #tmr imagines #tmr gally #tmr newt #tmr minho #thomas tmr #the maze runner

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rearranging-deck-chairs · 2 years

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thinking about clara telling 12 he made courtney feel not special and 12 at the end of the lie of the land telling bill “because in amongst seven billion, theres someone like you” and bill looking like

and 11 telling rita in the god complex "offer a child a suitcase full of sweets and they’ll take it. offer someone all of time and space and they’ll take that too. which is why you shouldnt” in that fucking self-flagellating but also proud way they do and rita says “i dont know what youre talking about but whatever it is, i have a feeling you just did it again” because they did

they know they know they know what they do and clara didnt have to tell them theyve been doing this long enough they know. and they dont like it but theyre not gonna stop doing it either which must be Great for the self-worth feelings. they have a job to do and they cant stop doing it but they also cant do it alone but also anyone they take with them will most likely get hurt or die

this is nothing new but it’s just. im thinking about the way they do it. the way they absolutely know the effect they have on people. “you make people want to impress you. you make it so they dont want to let you down”

how casually 12 throws out that line, so genuine, i 100% believe it feels true when they say stuff like that, but also bill just had a Bad 6 months. he didnt have to say this. bill asked why he puts up with humans he could say something nice about humanity as a whole, but he doesnt, he singles her out, “i put up with the rest of them because sometimes theres someone like you”. it’s sweet and i dont think it’s a lie and i dont even think it’s a conscious manipulation but like

it’s just like, a really good way to keep people with you when you make them feel like theyre at the centre of the universe like that. the universe revolves around the doctor and when youre in the eye of the storm with them youre so special. you know more than regular people, you get to know all the secrets of the universe, you get to know about aliens, you get to play hero along with them!

ROSE: I can't tell her. I can't even begin. She's never going to forgive me. And I missed a year. Was it good? DOCTOR: Middling. ROSE: You're so useless. DOCTOR: Well, if it's this much trouble, are you going to stay here now? ROSE: I don't know. I can't do that to her again, though. DOCTOR: Well, she's not coming with us. ROSE: No chance. DOCTOR: I don't do families. [...] ROSE: My mum was right. That is one hell of an age gap. Every conversation with you just goes mental. There's no one else I can talk to. I've seen all that stuff up there, the size of it, and I can't say a word. Aliens and spaceships and things, and I'm the only person on planet Earth who knows they exist.

being the object of the doctor’s affection is i think probably a bit of a horrifying experience and not a position you really want to be in, but as long as youre still in that Comments About How Theyre Putting Up With All Of Humanity Because They Like You stage and havent yet reached the Tearing The Sky Apart For You stage, it probably feels really good (do i look susceptible to companion syndrome in this post hkfjghj)

and like i said it’s not that they dont actually love their companions. of course they do. it’s just that if youre terrified of being abandoned, making people feel special like this is a good way to make them not leave you

and i think 13 probably did her best not to do this again. she didnt invite them along to new adventures at the end of 11x1. she initiates goodbyes i think three times (”ive stayed too long, i should get back to finding my tardis”, “im almost gonna miss you”, “guess we’re done, nice having you aboard”) before the fam ask to come with her

and sure she plays the kicked puppy a bit in 11x4 but she waits for yaz to invite her, shes relatively passive, actually for the doctor shes incredibly passive. and she enjoys letting them into the tardis in 11x2, but she doesnt tease really secrets and wonders if they come travel with her. she doesnt really introduce them to the tardis, she doesnt say what the name means, she doesnt let them touch anything, nobody says “it’s bigger on the inside”, she doesnt invite them to all of time and space. she doesnt suggest it could be theirs to see. i dont think she ever does. just what the fam got to see accidentally was already enough to convince them.

i really need to rewatch so i might be wrong about this, but i dont think she ever makes them feel special the same way the doctor did with companions before. she makes them feel special like a tour guide maybe, with her little points and stars system, and calling them best friends, small mundane ways that dont show off her age or history or influence. i dont think she ever suggests theyre more important than other people. i think she emphasises her love for humans as a whole. i think thats the impression they get from her. i think thats what they would say if you asked them about her. “yeah she loves humanity. me? yeah she probably likes me, we’re friends”

she never puts them in a position where theyre the only one who can save the day/world/planet/universe. she always puts herself between them and the problem. she always goes ‘no im the doctor, thats my job’. she takes that responsibility so they dont have to. they take it! when they feel like theyre forced to! when the doctor’s gone in 12x2 or 12x10, they take that responsibility for sure. i think they want to, not just yaz but especially yaz. but they feel unprepared. the doctor hasnt prepared them for this bc she doesnt want them in that position bc in that position they die.

and clearly this has not been ideal. this has not led to an ideal doctor-companion dynamic, we’ve seen how this has hurt 13 as well as especially i think yaz and ryan deeply. but the strategy has been succesful. she lost her last two companions bc she didnt get between them and the problem. with bill literally, with clara metaphorically. (going back even further this might also be the case for amy and donna and rose. she let them into positions she should have been in taking decisions she should have taken)

and however badly things have gone for 13, the strategies of Get Between Them And The Problem, and Be The Doctor Dont Let Them Do It, have WORKED. she GOT THEM HOME. if yaz doesnt die, and im willing to bet money she doesnt, she got them all home safe and sound

14′s relationship with their companions will probably be a response to what went wrong in this round and it will have its own pitfalls that 15 then gets to fix but theyre trying, theyre learning. one step forward two steps back i guess. a fun little tango with death

#im curious to see how 14's relationship with their compainons will look #and how they introduce themself #and how the companion ends up travelling with them

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pocket-gyu · 2 years

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Think About Me - Kim Mingyu

⚠️angst … + some fluff⚠️

Think about me - Kim Mingyu

Summary: mingyu is away on tour and y/n needs him. (angst)

Word Count: 1k

"y/n i told you this was going to happen. you knew this was going to happen when we started this relationship. you cant get angry about it now. especially since it has only been 3 weeks since i left." mingyu says with a rough voice. he is tired and y/n is complaining to him about missing him and him being gone on tour.

" its not that mingyu. i knew what i was getting into when i started this with you, and you do nothing but remind me everytime you leave for anything."

"then what is it y/n. im so tired of you mentioning this or that every phone call. just give it up, im not home right now but i will be in like 2 weeks i think you can hang on for a little longer like you always have. i dont get what has changed." mingyu's words slam into y/n with so much force that she cant even think of the next words to say. she cant believe mingyu could just openly say something like that to their loved ones.

" i would like to believe that you think about me while your gone, but this and how you never text me back pretty much sums it up. i told you before you left that my mom is getting her cancer results soon and she did. i really thought that if i needed you, you would be there. especially when i willingly wait for a time that i know you aren't busy. but im starting to really hurt here mingyu. i love you so much and im alwaysd there for you when you need me. i know you are a busy man being an idol and everything, but every once and a while i need you. i cant be the only one supporting the other in this relationship."

silence ensues between the couple as mingyu stares through the phone in shock at his girlfriends out burst. y/n has the phone layed down on the bed facing the ceiling, mingyu can hear the soft sob coming from her, and it makes him sigh and run his hand down his face. he knows that wonwoo will be coming into the hotel room soon from the small meet up he had with the stage manager. but he also knows that he cant just leave her crying because it would make the whole situation worse than it actually is.

after another mintue of silence mingyu finally decides to actually say something. "y/n did you guys get the news from your mothers doctor today?" he hears a sniffle and takes that as a yes. it makes sense as to why she is more emotional at the moment than normal. it had to of been bad. her mother has been sick for a really long time.

"yeah. they said its stage 4. she only has 2 to 3 months left." a cry leaves her mouth right after the last words enters the room. the pain of knowing her mother will be gone soon taking a hold over her. "she told me not to worry and to have hope that she will be here longer than the time frame given but its so bad gyu. so, so bad. she can already barely sit up on her own and the doctors are keeping her in the hospital for longer because they are scared her lungs will give out in the middle of the night." the words are just taking her over. there are so many things that the doctor said to y/n that is just upsetting that she cant get them all out at once.

"y/n i need you to breath for me. in through your nose out through your mouth. you need to calm down. i will figure out a way to get home to you some how sooner so that you wont be alone." his words shock y/n to the core.

"you don-"

"yes i do. you need me there and i cant let you go through this alone. and before you say anything they will understand. the members and carats. our carats will know that i have to do this." his words this time are touching. he is willing to risk his reputation with the fans in the places he still has to go, just to be with her. "say ok y/n so i know that you are listening." y/n nods her head yes and mingyu whispers that he loves her before hanging up the phone, presumably to talk to people about leaving back to korea.

y/n knows that the chances of him getting to leave soon is slim. he cant exactly just pick up everything and leave the tour. he has to make sure that everything is set with the boys and that the company is ok with him being in korea alone with her during this time. y/n could stay up all night and wait, but instead she falls asleep dreaming of mingyu laying next to her, hugging her close to him tight.

next morning 3am:

hello carats,

this is pledis entertainment. seventeens kim mingyu

will be taking a short temporary hiatus from all

activities under personal reasons. he apologizes

to all fans that will not be able to see him on tour as

he will be leaving from tour for his hiatus. it is uncertain

how long said hiatus will be, but he will return when he

is ready.

pledis entertainment

y/ns phone buzzes waking her up from her sleep. she picks up the phone and messily picks it up to read what it says. an article screenshot appears in front of her. she reads it slowly and gasps. he found a way to come home. y/n quickly calls mingyus phone hoping that he isn't already on the plane to korea. mingyu answers the phone on the second ring.

"i told you i would find a way baby!"

#seventeen #seventeen angst #seventeen x reader #seventeen mingyu #kim mingyu #mingyu angst #mingyu x reader #angst #kpop angst #kpop x reader #kpop fluff #kpop sad #mingyu sad

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borathae · 6 days

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Chapter 4

ooh looks like he is a gentleman

You can see it in the way he looks at his knees ever so often. dont tell me he slept

HE DID AHAHAH PLS this is peak comedy for me, idk i had this image of "ooh mysterious ancient being, must find sleep, and other stuff as something for the weak", basically a grandpa on him. (i see yoongi like that from reading the drabbles, but now that im reading it, tae felt like that in 1st chapter lol)

Of course not, I was merely resting my eyes” ofc i believe you, u were having a meditating/communicating with your ancestors moment

As if he doesn’t even notice his hand touching you the way it does. STOP I LITERALLY DIE EVERYTIME THIS HAPPENS WHEN IM READING LIKE AAAAAH *bites, slaps, giggles, fans myself, pretends to be dead soo much ah

Your chest heaves up and down in a heavy breath, your legs parting slightly. sis is gone already. mood

Come go with me. I SAID I HAVE NO TIME HEE HEE

Taehyung placed his hand on your thigh instead. OH NO HE IS GETTING DANGEROUS

Your nails dig into the edge of the seat, her: (literally made it, if only i had this devotion in my studies 😭)

Taehyung’s delight as another smirk washes over his face. He stops moving, the only sensation he allows you to feel is his big, warm hand against your inner thigh SDTOP I CANT HANDLE HIS ASS I CAN ALREADY IMAGINE THE FAKE GUM CHEWING AAAH

Tapping on your inner thigh rhythmical AAAAH WE MUST STAY FOCUSED BROTHER

Stay, fellow, I can read. I DOUBT I CAN IM LOSING MY SANITU

“Are you alright?” he rasps DO U THINK IM OK?????

My master’s. THAT FAST?? really said wanna see some speed?

You whine at the loss of touch, pulling at his necktie. PULLING NECKTIE WWWOOOO IM SQUIRTING

The door, which normally always squeaks, opens silently when Taehyung opens it mythical being or has strict parents pt 3 (pt 2 during the date)

I want to devour you.” yn my love, what if he actually does 😭(missed the vore tag on ao3 once and i have ptsd from that)

You’ll probably call me crazy but I named all of my houseplants after famous painters TAE MOVE UR ASS, SHE'S MINE WE ARE MARRIED BYE

Just mere seconds ago it felt like he wanted to devour you whole and now here he is, as patient as ever. i take that back, we can be a throuple

I didn’t even hear you come outside mythical being or has strict parents pt 4

It’s one of those weirdly dishonest smiles again. maybe he is in lactose intolerant and is worried destroying ur toilet with the volcanic diarrhea

It makes you look so perfectly alive." THATS EXACTLY WHAT A VAMPIRE WOULD SAY. i would have said that tho lol

I guess you are right. What a silly thing for me to say." OFC ITS VERY SILLY CUZ U IS MR.DRACULA

“Actually this is just a myth some misogynistic doctors made up in the sixteenth century to shame women for having sex”, SLAY now marry me

“so enjoy it ___ for as long and as passionate as you can.” THATS WHAT A GRANDPA WOULD SAY or A VAMPIRE

I am glad that you aren’t pretending with me hold ur horses he didnt say he is 95% honest, also the 5% could be more shocking than the 95%

swirling the tea in his cup with a flick of his wrist. LOOK AT DA FLICKA DA WRIST

My dream is to own a really big greenhouse. THE GARDEN IN THE DRABBLE

“you’re not having a heart attack, are you?” damn grandpa is dying (im sorry i had to)

OH SHIT WHATS GOING ON?? did she put some anti-mythical being stuff in the tea?

0-100 real quick

she is so cute im feeling it soo well, you wrote those parts well. it made me feel like im intruding them

Throw it on the floor *starts throwing it back Tae: i meant the tie me: oh sorry, silly me

that wasnt me, that was the demons bye

He has a really nice spine, my bestie to me - your spine is ... um how do i put it to words, spines very well. i will definitely count them for anatomy 💀💀LIKE STOP AT LEAST ITS BETTER COMPARED TO 4TH GRADE

thankfully Taehyung can’t read minds because this was one silly thought. you sure about that? u sure about that??👀👀

OH MY GOD HE IS IRRESISTIBLE LIKE STOP JUST AAAAH

Dearmotherofchrist what the hell? Okay, goodbye cruel world this is how you will die. PLS 😭😭

This is madness. Heaven. ME AT YOU POOKIE

besides, we have many more occasions to practice your stamina SUCH A TEASE AAH

im sick and feeling cold. guess who isnt cold anymore cuz they are reading a smexy, gobsmacking as usual smut by THE MOMMY, SIBI?? ME YALL. a hoe(mentally) doesnt get cold, until they get runny nose.

don’t rip it because this cost like forty bucks” WE LOVE REALISTIC SMUT HERE

He scissors them, fucking in and out of you slowly. His teeth craze over your nipple before he bites down. poeple died sir I DIED

During class, on the bus, whilst talking to people. same here girly pop, relatable after reading smut

watching you be like this drives me crazy I AM CRAZY

me: i hope i dont fall him: he praises me: ana oop

It is a stupid name, but it has never been more accurate than tonight. no it aint stupid when true af

"Hold me"..“That’s it, draw me in deeper. Keep me there” bye i will be jumping off the cliff(my bed's name)

seven matches this soo well, cuz its sexy but very romantic

that was too hot until u think (wait this is bts songs in a nutshell)

oh boi tae is just trying feel humanity, life, and the whole "live in the moment", "yolo" by asking to hold closer and feel what she is feeling

horny - sad real quick. (bts albums and playlists be like)

Sex is merely a wonderful byproduct from being with you. You have truly bewitched me, body and soul” this is too good holy fuck

reminds me of blood sweat and tears lines and the whole mood is hold me tight

they are soo cute, being all warm and cozy with each other.

shitting tears as we speak bye,

the emotions were emotioning, smut smuting (do i even have to say about this anymore lol) i love how your smut isnt just focused on sexy parts, emotionally, yes very much connected and love it and also shows other parts, like its soo easy to have the entire view from pillow to toes, with lil frames with focused parts.

now that we still havent seen 2seokkook, its making more nervous like

EXCUSE ME??GOOGLE JUST VIOLATED ME 💀

this is actually so funny HAHHAHAH he is always acting like such a well-put mysterious man and then he is sleeping in class BHAHAHAHAH

this is so valid HE IS SO HOT LIKE SIR PLEASE FADNFDSN

the gum chewing pisses me off with any other person BUT ITS SO HOT WHEN HE DOES IT LIKE PLEASE KEEP DOING IT SIR IMMA SUCK YOUR COCK

You whine at the loss of touch, pulling at his necktie. PULLING NECKTIE WWWOOOO IM SQUIRTING

jajdfj valid.

I want to devour you.” yn my love, what if he actually does 😭(missed the vore tag on ao3 once and i have ptsd from that)

NO BUT WHAT IF??? oh god hahhaha I feel you I once missed the impregnation tag and actually triggered myself when he started speaking about putting babies in her like BACK OFF ILL BITE YOUR BALLS OFF

It’s one of those weirdly dishonest smiles again. maybe he is in lactose intolerant and is worried destroying ur toilet with the volcanic diarrhea

PLEASE hhahahhaha this would be so iconic of him tbfh

“Actually this is just a myth some misogynistic doctors made up in the sixteenth century to shame women for having sex”, SLAY now marry me

he is SO HOT I need him to fuc-

My dream is to own a really big greenhouse. THE GARDEN IN THE DRABBLE

👀👀👀👀

OH SHIT WHATS GOING ON?? did she put some anti-mythical being stuff in the tea?

THAT IS A VERY GOOD QUESTION INDEED

LISTEN. don't judge me but I genuinely think that spines (inside the body where they're supposed to be) can be so sexy like if someone has a nice spine I just wanna trace and lick and kiss and touch it like-

thankfully Taehyung can’t read minds because this was one silly thought. you sure about that? u sure about that??👀👀

THE RIGHT QUESTION INDEED

im sick and feeling cold. guess who isnt cold anymore cuz they are reading a smexy, gobsmacking as usual smut by THE MOMMY, SIBI?? ME YALL. a hoe(mentally) doesnt get cold, until they get runny nose.

I gain ten years of life each time one of you calls me Mommy HAHHAHA like yes I am indeed mother HFAHDSF

don’t rip it because this cost like forty bucks” WE LOVE REALISTIC SMUT HERE

BAHHAHAHAH I LOVE REALISM

me: i hope i dont fall him: he praises me: ana oop

BITCH (affectionate) SAME HOLY FUCK praise works so well with me like it got me thinking about the person for the next five weeks for real

oh boi tae is just trying feel humanity, life, and the whole "live in the moment", "yolo" by asking to hold closer and feel what she is feeling

*sobs*

reminds me of blood sweat and tears lines and the whole mood is hold me tight

OMFG I LOVE THIS THANK YOU

shitting tears as we speak bye,

hahahhaa shitting tears jfadsjf

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SAYING THIS!!! that's exactly what I want most of my smut to be for 😭😭😭

#asks: sanguis alpha #asks #minusback #tw: long post #tw: blood

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motionjames · 3 months

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More of me whining incessantly! I want to say that it's not all bad, but I can't say it's all good either... ^^" uwaaahhhn...

I will keep saying "it'll be okay!" even if I dont entirely believe it.

I don't want to complain to my roomates, I'm already lying around so much, and I don't want to cry in front of my sister... In the mornings I end up crying and she looks really worried. It's not out of sadness or even pain, it's just that my body is stressed from everything so it starts up like that. Most of all I feel frustration since I cant work and my day job is about to hit a deadline. I need to pay rent, and I cant let anybody down. But I've spent most of my days with this squeezing feeling and little needles.

It's probably some kind of heart condition but my doctor (who is very nice!) is unable to find anything at the moment. I always feel like I'm wasting her time, or that I'm lying about soemthing. But I'm not lying! I have to keep reminding myself! That kind of thing isnt normal everyday! But even then, I feel like I'm lying ^^"

So the only thing I can do recently is read and write. I'm almost finished with The Moon Is Down by John Steinbeck and om sort of sad that it nearly over because I've read everything else on my shelf... I should go to the library, but going out leaves me out of breath. Ah, I still have those books I need to return. Thank goodness there arent any late fees \( ^_^)/

That leaves writing. It's hard to focus for long periods so I try to cut it up into snippets. I have two vns I'm supposed to be putting out but I've been so slow... theres a story I wanna write that's really eviscerating, but I hafta finish these first. It struck me as really funny that I write about a buncha guys with pains in their chest and now I have a pain in my chest too. Wahahaha.

Growing up I would have a stabbing feeling whenever I felt some negative emotion, it was really embarrassing. It was like an intense squeezing with a knife in the side. But it's silly to talk about because it was all psychosomatic. Even as an adult I had those. I ended up writing about that kind of feeling subconsciously because I was so embarrassed.

There was a certain incident that happened and my mood worsened all around, even now I cant sleep properly, but around that time I started getting more intense pangs without warning. I started writing something on the side very transparently about that with a young man traveling around as a hole in his chest grows and eventually kills him. I dont know if I will ever put it out but I go back to it time to time for fun. Now, I have that feeling everyday no matter the mood. I wonder if this whole time it wasnt anything psychosomatic, but actually serious? I'm so dense! Uwaaaaahhh!

So all I can do at the moment is write. Not even that much, mind you. How annoying. I'm worried my bitter feelings will spill over or that it'll come out too ugly. I don't think so... At least the stories will be fine. Ah, but my head hurts. Everything is squeezing again. I wont cry, but maybe I will, but I wont! Ahhhh! I cant become more useless than I already am! I miss everyone a lot! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

#chip talks

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heartsforjngwn · 1 year

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— in another life. ksn

SYPNOSIS: kim sunoo, your childhood bestfriend and notably your first love. been with you in every ups and downs including the tragic car accident that lead to your parents' death and your hospitalization. while things were at their worst, he was always with you, striving to have a smile appear on your face.

PAIRING: caring!sunoo × hospitalized!reader (fem)

WORD COUNT: 641

GENRE/TROPES: angst!! best friends to lovers (tho they dont have a back story on that i think)

WARNINGS: su!c!d3 (tho not shown), main character d3@th

NOTE: first fic!! sorry if there are grammatical or spelling errors :^) lowercase is intentional. hope you like this fic!! do reblog and like 🫶

staring at the window, out to the world you last experienced long before. it was another day in the hospital, laying on a bed with i.v. tubes on your arm. reminiscing the happy times you spent with your then-alive parents lead to you shedding a tear. you definitely missed them. a lot.

the sound of the door opening together with an uttered greeting from your boyfriend got your attention as he sat down on the chair beside your bed.

“brought you flowers and ice cream!” in an attempt to cheer you up, he opened a tube of cookies and cream ice cream for you and a tube of mint chocolate for him. “you didn’t have to do all this..” you spoke as you held the bouquet of colorful tulips. “but i want to. now say ah! the airplane is coming~” you laughed as he did an airplane motion with a spoon of ice cream.

“sunoo..” his attention was brought to you as you stared into those eyes that makes you happy every minute you fall deep into them. those dazzling eyes that captures you and gives you the comfort you always needed.

“don’t you think i would never make it out of here?” you asked, intrusive thoughts taking over you.

“you will make it out of here, don’t you dare say you never would! that’s such negative energy y/n!” he huffed. “but its been months since that incident happened, im not even getting better sunoo..”

“y/n, you will get better! the doctors will do their best to make sure you will.”

“but aren’t you tired, sunoo? its been 3 months and everyday without a fail you always visit me with food, flowers, and gifts. i don’t want you wasting that much time on me anymore sun.”

“hey, im doing this not only because you are my best friend. but also because you are my first love. y/n, with all those years i spent with you, i will never forgive myself if i let you suffer all of this pain without me by your side. we are together forever, i promised you that.” he said as he held my hand and caressed it, reassuring me that everything will soon turn out to be okay.

— your's

its been three months and im tired. but he never isnt. he never fails to put a smile on my face because he lights up my world. he takes care of me every single day. he's always with me through think and thin. i love him so much.

— sunoo's

"we found a note on the table. i believe this is for you, mr. kim" the nurse handed me a folded piece of paper. my y/n, why must you do this..

TO: the love of my life

hey sunshine!! im sorry for leaving you so sudden like this.. im tired, my love. i dont want to keep burdening you either by taking care of me even when we know i wont get any better. dont be sad too much! im probably with my parents right about now so im happy here. ill miss you :((( do find someone else to love! make sure you love them as much as you loved me. promise me you'll find your happiness without me there, alright? love you lots for the last time <3

FROM: your one and only, y/n

i cant fulfill that promise, my love.

but i promise you that in another life, i will most definitely make you stay. and in another life, i will be your only for the rest of it. in that life, ill love you harder and take care of you more than i ever did. ill fullfil this promise even if it takes so long. ill fullfil this promise in another life, so you wont have to go away.

mi corazon es tuyo, forever.

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beeben · 1 month

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So I was going through some Krieg fics on AO3 and found your story "Monstrous"... Fuck that hit way too close to home. It was so amazingly written, I can sympathize bc I suffer with self loathing in my worse times, some of it was like seeing my own thoughts written out in front of me. I'm 1000% going to be reading Paging Doctor Samuels once I get the time to, I can tell its something you've had a passion for based on how much content you have going for it. Keep up the amazing writing 💙

AUUUUUGHHH THANK YOUUU monstrous is honestly one of my favorite things ive ever written like i poured my GUTS into that thing brother. I try so hard to capture him right. Hes always been a challenge for me because of a few reasons, i try to keep his thought patterns as realistic as i can with also acknowledging that hes like. Not normal yknow??? I don't like going oh psycho krieg sane krieg babbling back and forth i dont think real people work like that (even in someone with DID. I don't think he does have DID i just think he has a compartmentalized personality and schizo-affective disorder.) I don't like saying a specific disorder because i think that ties him too much to real life and it devalues people who have like schizophrenia or bipolar or other real cluster b personality disorders.. i dont think its right to add a real label to a character they specifically made to be an ahhh crazy psycho dude...... THAT BEING SAID! i think he (especially in the dlc) is one of the more respectful renditions of a severe mental illness that ive seen and i do want to keep him in that vein of believability.

Him saying "my other self" is referring to what everyone thinks is psycho krieg, but to me when I look at that, its not different from him. He says "my other self" to distance himself from things he finds revolting/stuff hed "never do". I think his body image is one of the leading things that effect this and thats kinda why i wrote this. He looks in the mirror and he doesnt see himself. He sees a thing that someone else made and attached his soul to. a lot of what i focus on with him is the acceptance stage in grief, i think thats the hardest part and people definitely back track a lot.

Hes grieving his past self. Its a big issue for him. He misses something he doesn't remember, and thinking of it for too long scares him. He feels stuck. He feels stupid. He feels like hes lost.

Mayas kinda like an anchor for him. Not in a manic pixie dream girl type of way- i dont think either of them see her as that- but like a support system. Everyone benefits from someone who can ground you during a crisis and i don't necessarily think it has to be a romantic partner but in this case it is, cus she knows him well enough and she sees and can identify the signs of him when hes going through it.

Krieg to me is a very private person. He puts on a persona to people for defense. The fact that Maya can see right through it makes him WILDLY uncomfortable. Cus he's always been taught that in order to be a good partner for someone (a man with a woman specifically) you cant act dangerous or threatening at all to them or else its predatory and youre seen like an abuser. He thinks his whole being is dangerous. Its not really that he struggles with masculinity, thats not a problem for him really its more like hes been told that he SPECIFICALLY is undesirable, he specifically is overly violent, hes too big, hes too unhinged to be in a healthy relationship with a woman. (This goes back further than the experimentation i feel like his mother specifically had something to do with his self image + why he became a mercenary in the first place.)

Maya doesn't care about that. Shes had like . 0000000001% of the romantic/sexual experience that he's had she does NOT know what a typical relationship looks like whatsoever. She doesnt even call him her boyfriend she doesn't define relationships like that at all. They're partners thats what she sees. Theyre equals to eachother. Mayas just as if not more fucked in the head as he is, and twice as dangerous.

She'll support him through anything he needs and she loves him for his uniqueness and his roughness and his WHOLE personality not just what he thinks is likeable about him. His thought process getting with her started as " she can see that deep down im not a monster" to "shed still be there even if i was a monster and still feel the same way" its subtle but its emotionally wrecking to him because that means she's really not there to coddle him. Its not tough love like you and i would say necessarily but he has this image in his head that if he found true love hed go "back to normal" and if he doesn't then hes not trying hard enough. He's gotta accept he'll never be normal and that's completely fine.

With that though comes loneliness. Even if he accepts hes different its still very isolating. It doesn't have to be though, especially in borderlands.

Krieg is still human. Thats probably the most important thing to me. He looks a little funny but his heart beats red blood and his head is full of deep philosophy and love and emotions that only people can experience.

Sentience is a blessing and i feel like he needs to learn that that blessing includes him :) thanks for reading.

#me rambling #borderlands #krieg the psycho #maya the siren #psyren #now pds is a different story thats Mayas Story #his part of it i still think holds these themes but its definitely mostly about her #i can go into that more later if you want but if you havent read it yet i wouldn't want to spoil #thanks for sending this btw it makes me feel warm inside

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aajjks · 2 months

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i’m finally back!! out of respect for ramadan, i will pick back up on “you know who” later 🤫. for now, we’ll take a trip back in time to when jinseoul was just a wittle babyy. AKA first-time dad!jk~

TC!dad!JK

“YOUR HIGHNESS!! QUICK!! QUEEN Y/N HAS JUST GONE INTO LABOR!!” says a nurse who barges into the king’s very important meeting. despite knowing her abrupt interruption could cost her head, had the king not been informed of the birth of his first-born, then he’d have everyone’s head.

it may seem hard to understand how you and jungkook had gotten to a point where you are giving birth to his child but it’s simple: you started softening up. you began listening to him and in return he started listening to you and eventually, one thing led to another and you unexpectedly got pregnant. the birth of your first-born child was never planned. it was so unplanned that when miriam kept insisting you could be pregnant, you kept going on with your day to day life without paying any attention to the constant nausea, light headedness, and missing menstrual.

it wasn’t until 2-weeks later that you visited dr. lee and he confirmed that you were indeed pregnant. feeling shocked, scared, and nervous, you kept your pregnancy hidden from jungkook for the first four months. all the progress you both made was thrown out of the window when miriam told jungkook. he was hurt that you hid it from him for so long and refrained from talking to you but still took care of any and all things needed for you and his growing child.

here you are; both are, 9-months later with you yelling at the top of your lungs with miriam holding your hand while jungkook rushes to your aid. you pant “i-i can’t do this. it hurts. IT HURTS SO MUCH!!!”

“it’s okay, y/n. just breathe, okay?” consoles miriam as she uses her free hand to caress your wet face that’s mixed with tears and sweat. “you’re doing great—”

“we can see the baby’s head! keep pushing, queen y/n!!” the doctor encourages.

“you ready? take a breath, 1..2..3 PUSH!!!!”

you do as miriam and the doctors instruct you and continue pushing with all of your might.

“everyone, the king is here! king jungkook is here, make way please” says the nurse as she moves aside so jungkook could see you. miriam lets go of your hand and allows jungkook to take your hand instead.

~🫧

As soon as he enters your chamber where you’re giving birth, he’s… he’s shocked. He actually cant believe that you’re giving birth to his child right now.

But all of it feels too real, and he feels a little lightheaded. you’re definitely screaming in this bottle of the people are excited nervous and he can also see the doctors face.

Are you all right?? a lot of things are going through his head right now, but he’s going to keep it together for you because you’re the one that’s giving birth, not him.

Jungkook immediately grabs your hand as he prepares for his princess- yes, he wants a girl. You squeeze his hand so tightly and it almost hurts, but it’s OK because you seem to be in a lot of pain right now and it’s- too much for him to see even though he’s seen a lot of gore.

No one could’ve ever prepared him to watch his wife, give birth to his first child.

He exhales and looks at you. Even though he has been angry with you for the last 5 months, but right now? Everything is about to change forever.

He wishes he can take pain away from you, but he cannot.

He’s still mad at you because you didn’t tell him that you were pregnant when you first found out- you didn’t let him experience the joy of that.

And although this is the first time that a king from the Jeon Dynasty has entered the chamber where his queen is giving birth, but he’s always been the one to break the rules.

“Y-Yn… you can do this- see our child is almost out- oh my God I see the head- o-oh look yn- it’s body- I see it.” he chokes out, this is so real, and

His biggest dream is coming true right in front of his eyes.

Jungkook feels tears well up in his eyes as he witnesses the birth of his child.

You give his hand one last squeeze before you push one more time, The screams of agony are all he can hear from your mouth, but then suddenly all of the sounds die down in the room.

There’s the baby.

His baby.

He’s just 24 right now, and he’s become a father.

You’re two years younger than him and it’s even worse for you, but this is a really good thing, because this child will fix everything between you two. Jungkook feels a wave of overwhelming emotions hit him as the doctor pulls out the child.

Jungkook cannot stop watching- he hears everyone congratulating him but he’s just so focused on the baby right now.

He feels tears run down his cheeks.

“Congratulations my King.. your majesty- the queen has given birth to a prince.”

A son. You just gave him a son. Jungkook cries, squeezing your hand ever so tightly.

He’s become a father now.

#oh my God welcome back I was starting to get concerned 😭🫶🏻#also he’s become a DILF at 24 YALL #ask: tc!jungkook #this is going to be really fun #aw jinseoul welcome to the world you have no idea what chaos await u #🥺🥺🥺🥺

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winderlylandchime · 7 months

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2/2 Hunter showed up now all dressed nicely and showered ‘he looks like he’d knock on my door to talk about the big guy. I like him..little shit’ ‘oh Ted. *starts shaking his head* this hurts a lot. Emmett come on baby, please get rid of him until he gets better. This is not okay. Oh fuck you Ted! WHY IS HE MAD THAT EMMETT IS SUCCESSFUL?! He deserves good things! WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ME? This fucking finale for this fucking show better be good or im gonna be so fucking pissed at them for making me sad all the time’ ‘FUCKING TRUMP BITCH! WHY IS BRIAN HERE?! what the hell is going on? Oh he looks pretty. *looks at me and puts his hands up in defense* dont take this wrong but leather looks good on him. I mean he looks nice in suits but this *waves at brian in stockwells office* Bellissimo!! I like his hair, its all spikey and shit. OH FUCK YOU, you cant do shit for him! *does a little cheers to him with his soda* yeah! No apologies and no regrets. I should live my life like that too *long pause while he goes to get his pills in the kitchen* but i got anxieties bro. HE is offering BRIAN his job back? After he caught him fucking on his own troll posters? Oh he is SCARED!’ The Ted/Em party is on ‘this is killing me. Drugs are evil and so is that fucker! Ted come on! WHY IS HE BEING PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE?! Emy baby, sugar, you deserve better please.’ ‘YES BRIAN! I KNEW YOU WERE SMART! EVEN THO FOR SOME REASON THEY MADE YOU DUMB IN THE BEGINNING OF THE SEASON! *looks at me and pauses tv on Brian again* okay be honest.. could i pull off that type of leather jacket like him? Like that brown one is my new favorite thing. I want it. *points at me while continuing to watch ep* that b-t-w is what oxford dictionary would call a hint. Carl stop being stup- HES DEAD?! THE COP IS DEAD? Suicide? But he made sure to wash his car? What the fuck?’ *once again pauses tv on Em and looks at me with a big smile* ‘i think i have a new idea for a shirt (me: please no, youve done too much already) oh come on! Little mary go fuck yourself sounds hilarious. You’re no fun.’ ‘AW BLONDIE TOOK OU-HIS BOYFRIENDS ADVICE! Thats right Blondie! Gotta take care of your education so that you can be successful and be successful boyfriends with your succes-well currently unemployed boyfriend but oh well. THEY WANT HIM TO WHAT NOW TO WHO? Oh hell no! Absolutely not! Fuck you all.’ ‘Full offense but I wouldn’t allow this doctor mark or whatever to put a fucking bandaid on me. Emmett please im begging you leave him. You deserve way better. Ted *points at him* get fucking help. NO EMMETT NO YOU ARE NOT ANY TYPE OF TRASH FROM ANYWHERE! You dont need him! WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ME?!’ Hunter was told to make a wish for something he wants more than anything ‘wanna bet that his wish was for Brian to fuck him? That’d be mine. Okay Mel is on my good side again.’ ‘ITS JUSTIN AND BRIAN AGAIN! *said with a goofy smile on his face* Brian cares so much about Blondie’s education, it’s actually adorable. I don’t think he cares about anything as much as him doing good in school and being successful. AH-DOR-ABLE! (Justins says sometimes you have to sacrifice everything for what you believe in) *stands up quickly* AND THATS WHY I SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO EAT A PICKLE! Because i believe I am way better than some weird allergy! (I go to say something and he immediately stops me) shhh- hold up, Brian is gonna do something cute. OH DAMN LOOK AT THAT KISS AND HUG! I was right. Put on the next episode, i already miss them’

Put on the next episode, i already miss them is the biggest mood ever

Uhh, remember what I said about hearing him wail all the way in CA? Well “this fucking finale for this fucking show better be good or im gonna be so fucking pissed at them” is making me more worried. Maybe you should have some fanfiction all pulled up and ready to go, just shove it in his face while he’s still crying.

The Ted and Emmett party is so so cringe and awful. Poor Emmy.

He wants Bri Bri’s leather jacket (Gale looks so good in leather) for christmas? From you? Oh lord.

I will take a Team Brian and a Little Mary Go Fuck Yourself t shirt when he sets up his etsy store.

I don’t think Justin’s “sometimes you need to sacrifice everything for what you believe in extends to your brother eating a pickle.

#ask winderlylandchime #dear sweet anon #queer as folk #a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023

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captainmera · 2 years

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Hey! Love your comic <3 as someone in the same age gap as you, I was wondering how do you go about making time for adult responsibilities and a webcomic, I find it very hard to work on one while having a dayjob and household chores

Hello! Thank you for enjoying my story! :D

Unfortunately, my living situation is a bit different. So my answer might not be very helpful.

But in order to be transparent and maybe share what my life looks like, here's a long answer! Hopefully this insight gives you some clue on what you can do for yourself.

this is long. But bear with it!

First of all - I don't have a job.

I live in Sweden and I have benefits, which means minimum wage.

The thing is that IBWR is what I do to not go completely silly in my home. Most of my life is within the boarder of my home [for reasons] and I am either struck with the whispers of depression going This is all there ever will be, or the whimsical story of IBWR. And one doesn't want me to walk around anymore, the other wants me to walk around long enough to finish what I've started. Between the two, the later sounds more appealing. I like living.

I have a schedule,

and this is the key to getting anything done.

A common misconception is waiting around for the muses of art and writing to waterboard you in their fountain. This is incorrect. You have to make appointments for that sort of thing and believe you me when I say this: If you make an appointment with them, they will show up with more creative tools to torture you with than water.

If you have an appointment with a friend, you show up. If you have an appointment with your doctor, you show up. If you have an appointment with the story that is in your heart and constantly on your mind, you have to show up.

You have to make an appointment with yourself and you have to show up for it. I promise this works. Open up your art program or writing document and I promise things will happen. If you have difficulty getting started anyway, you are missing either a hot beverage or a hat.

If it is important to you, you make time for it.

And if you, for some unpointable reason can't seem to make yourself show up for your own appointment and keep rescheduling, you might have a case of lacking reason.

What's a good reason, you ask?

Well... Why do you want to make your story? It's going to be easier to show up for it if you know why you want to sit down with the story. Is it to be popular? to meet friends? to get rich? to just make something creative as a hobby? To build a portfolio? To get into the art industry? Maybe it's not even a webcomic you want to do, maybe it's comic strips or animatics. Why did you show up to your meeting today? And, mind you - all reasons are valid. There's no moral compass that determines which is more noble a cause or not. Put that nonsense in the bin. This is a judgement free zone. Dreams has no judgement. Be you, do you, chase your happiness. I am rooting for you!!! If you are dreaming about being popular due of something you have created - that's cool! Great! Now you know how to approach your appointment and how to schedule the appropriate amount of time and energy for it. Knowing is just going to make it easier for you to know what you need to do to get where you want with it.

I have chores too, and I live alone.

Chores are.... Chores. I don't like doing the dishes (Laundry is fine, and vacuuming too!), I don't have a dishwasher and I can't afford one. But it needs to be done. Sometimes you just gotta roll up your sleeves and get it over with, maybe buy a new scrub brush. I live alone so it's not a lot, but after a week there's still a wee lil' pile there staring at me as though it had hips to put it's hands on and ask me where I've been all night. I really should schedule to do dishes twice a week, but you don't want to have a meeting with dishes twice a week lest you want it to zap away the little energy of joy you've gathered thru the week. You got to live a little too, damnit! It cant be all chores and responsibilities! My rule is that cleaning takes maximum 20 minutes and minimum 5 minutes. And knowing how little time that is in comparison to an entire week, as well as having a scheduled date and hour for it, helps tremendously.

Besides, you probably have two hells to knock on. My second one is the gym.

Oh, Hell. Turns out you can make an appointment with hell, show up at its door and think "Ah, Monday. I hope the leg-press is available."

But really, again, making a scheduled time for chores - as well as anything else - does help a lot. And most importantly, sticking to that schedule.

Schedules are sacred.

I know some youngins are anti-schedule and think routines are what makes you dull and boring. In truth, routines that YOU have made (not someone else) for yourself are a blessing. It gives you control over your life when it feels like things are going too quickly downhill on a bike without breaks. Having a routine gives you a sense of respect for the things you do, at least if you commit to following up on them. When YOU make decisions of when you wake up, when you sleep, when you eat when you work when you make time for beloved people, etc.. It will teach you self-respect and the gratification of sticking to a promise you made for yourself. To recognise you can keep a promise to yourself, repeatedly, to commit to yourself is a gift nobody but you can give yourself. This gift will seep into everything you do. This will be the soil to a seed that's been waiting to grow for a long time:

Confidence.

And you need confidence to post something as vulnerable as a story. It starts small - choose when you wake up, that's easier than choosing when to sleep. Once you've taught yourself how to wake up at 7am, consistently, suddenly this determination seeps into other things that needs to get done. Like chores. Tasks at work. Making nerve-wrecking calls. buying food. Making a webcomic. And then, one day. There you are. Going downhill, with breaks you've made yourself and think "what a nice road." You get to choose what is a priority, who gets to have a piece of your time (that isn't obligatory like a job or kids), and it will teach you that your time is valuable. Your schedule is sacred. And it will teach you that not everyone are privy to your time. People who try to bully you into giving them a time in your schedule will never have time available to them. Bullies already steal enough of your time as it is, after all, by trying to get your attention. And! it will make the people you choose to make time for feel more important to you and they will feel important to you as well - you chose them, after all, for no other reason than that you want to spend your time with them. People like to feel important to others, it makes them feel loved. Schedules will give you a peace of mind. And the best thing about schedules is that they are forgiving when you are forgetful or life happens. It's called rescheduling. So there's no need for guilt or shame. As long as you make sure to show up next time.

So when should you schedule doing a webcomic?

You don't have to start with drawing everyday. You can start scheduling once or every second week. Heck, once a month is a good start too! As long as you show up for it. Set the bar where it feels like you will actually show up for it, consistently. Every time, on the dot. Like a friend for a coffee.

And, if you by some unknown reason, still find yourself rescheduling your own appointment with the webcomic over and over.. You need to face the reasons why. Do you think it will fail? Are you scared nobody will like it? Do you feel like your skill isn't good enough to begin yet? Do you think you need to know stuff about things before you begin? Why are you afraid?

I was afraid too.

Not to get too tmi here, but I had gotten it into my head that I had to compensate, somehow, for being alive. That unless I was a normal adult (whatever that means), if I didn't become what was expected of me - then I had failed. At life. And I had some debt to pay to... I don't know? The universe? Something. I had to be convenient to be loved and accepted. When you have to plan your life around someone else's unpredictability you lose yourself in the process. When you plan your life around abstract things like "success" you will quickly find yourself lost and feeling very, very, alone.

IBWR came to me anyway, even when I felt worthless, voiceless and unimportant. And it told me things I needed to hear, needed to see, needed to understand. I felt like I had waited for this story to give me a hug for a very long time. And one of my driving forces to continuing to make IBWR, to continuing showing up for it's appointments, became "maybe someone else needs a hug from my story, too."

You dont need a big hearty reason to write a story.

You just need a reason, any reason, that makes show up and want to show up - for yourself.

Nobody else is going to show up to write this story. Nobody else will feel like this story is important to make, until you make it important to yourself to work on it. Nobody knows what this story is about yet, but you do - You are this story's only voice.

Make an appointment with it.

Open up your scheduler and find an hour to sit down and just think about the story. Maybe doodle for it. Make w.i.ps and sketches. Make reference sheets, make notes, write a chapter with words first, maybe write the chapter youre most excited about and work your way backwards! "working on the comic" means any of those things and more. Working on a story means work before the work.

Start anywhere, but begin with an appointment.

I promise it works.

Oh! And, if it doesn't - hot beverage or a hat. Trust me. It's one of those things.

#ibwr #mera writes #liveblogging #personal #writing #write a webcomic #draw a webcomic #schedule #schedules are sacred #captains logbook #captains log #captain's log

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intersex-support · 2 years

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hi! im sure you get sick of getting this but i need some help as im questioning intersex after many years and lots of research. specifically im question if i have swcah. ive had pots symptoms for as long as i can accurately recall and am close to constantly in some level of adrenal fatigue, im always craving salt and having electrolyte imbalances as well as feeling dehydrayed easily and having awful circulation.

physically, i had a lot of early growth spurts and was one of my tallest classmates, but now as an adult im barely average, about as tall as my dad who is kind of short for his circumstances. ive been growing facial hair since middle school, and now that i identify as some? flavor of trans masc? almost everyone ive met in recent years asks me how long ive been on T, based on my voice and amount of face and body hair. ive never in my life had access to T, i havent started it, and people are genuinely shocked by it.

[possibly tmi trying to be medical]

i also absolutely have clitoromegaly, thats another reason partners as well have asked before if i have been on T, as well even growing up and before i had any concept of what intersex conditions were, i knew there was something off there and i would awkwardly (like a very small child) tell people i *actually* had, um, "both" when i was gendered as a kid, until i got told by my parents to stop because i was wrong.

final thing probably: i had to get a full physical at 11, including genital physical, and there was a point that my mother was pulled aside and whispered something that she never told me no matter how much i asked. ive been growing increasingly worried lately that it was related to an intersex condition in someway, even if not using those terms, but since im no contact i cant ask now. sorry, i know that one is anecdotal, so feel free to ignore it.

i just want to know why i am the way i am

hi! again! i forgot to mention that i started puberty around 10-11 and ive never had a very normal cycle, sometimes it would be almost normal for a few months then i would go months without anything again, and eventually a really short but really intense, painful, heavy cycle after so long of nothing, its always been like this for me. 2/2

Hey anon!

So, I've done some research to answer this question but I am not an expert on salt wasting CAH and def would reccomend checking things with a doctor if possible. It defintely sounds like you have a lot of symptoms of CAH. Having clitoromegaly, growth spurts but now mostly average, having body hair, the irregular periods--all of those things really stand out to me as symptoms of CAH, and also especially the doctor keeping something secret from you, cause that happens to so many intersex kids.

What I'm less certain about is if you could have gone this far into life without being diagnosed with salt wasting CAH. I know that newborn screening for salt wasting CAH started in the 1980s, but I entirely believe it's possible that it could have been missed, or wherever you were born didn't screen you, or something like that. My understanding, however, is that salt wasting CAH is life threatening if not treated and I'm wondering if it is possible that you could have gotten into adulthood without ever going into adrenal crisis. From everything I've read, it seems like salt wasting CAH is usually diagnosed in childhood because people with salt wasting CAH will go into adrenal crisis without treatment. Honestly, the only way I really think that you could have salt wasting CAH is if you had gone into a salt wasting crisis while you were a newborn but it was treated, and it was hidden from you. It sounds like there's a complicated relationship with your mother and already a pattern of hiding some medical info from you, so I suppose it could be possible that it happened but the info is not in your medical records. Have you ever been on hydrocortisone, prednisone, or dexamethasone long term, as well fludrocortisone? I'd say only if you have been on those medicines long term and had salt wasting crises, that you could possible have salt wasting CAH.

However, what I think is more likely is that you have a variation of CAH that is not salt wasing and also not NCAH. My first guess would be that you have simple virilizing CAH, which is still considered "classical CAH" but is without salt wasting crises. With SV CAH, people usually have a less severe aldosterone deficiency. This means that you might still have symptoms like hyponatremia (low sodium), hyperkalemia (high potassium), hypoglycemia, dehydration, and could also maybe even cause your poor circulation. Usually, this doesn't progress to the point of salt wasting crisis and is more mild than swCAH, but is generally more severe than NCAH. Besides sv classical CAH, there are also rare forms of CAH caused by defienciencies in other enzymes, which have a wide variety in presentations of symptoms.

Another thing that I just learned about is CAH X, which is a variation of CAH that's comorbid with EDS. If you also have Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, it might be worth looking into. With CAH X, there's a specific genetic cause that causes EDS, CAH, and most people are also comorbid with POTS.

Also, there is a chance that you could just have more severe symptoms of NCAH. I just read a study that says 1/3 of people with NCAH have a cortisol insufficency. Cortisol insufficency can also cause weakness, fatigue, dizziness, electrolyte imbalance, low sodium--so there may be a chance that you have NCAH and a more severe cortisol insufficency. Anecdotally, a lot of people with NCAH have POTS comorbid (I do as well!) and there really hasn't been a lot of research on NCAH and POTS. It looks like there might be more of a connection between NCAH and adrenal insufficency then previously thought, but there isn't a lot of research done on NCAH. I read another study talking about how a lot of research papers do not specify whether they include NCAH in their numbers of people with CAH.

Basically, I think that it is unlikely that you've made it to adulthood without getting diagnosed with salt wasting CAH, because salt wasting CAH is basically life threatening if untreated. It is more likely that you have classical simple virilization CAH, a rarer subtype of CAH, or NCAH with severe symptoms.

Please feel free to ask if you have any other questions, and good luck!

-Mod E

#asks #actuallyintersex #cah #ncah #cah x #also: if you haven't ruled out Addison's disease you def want to look at that #bc that's the other main adrenal insuffiency thing #addison's isn't intersex tho #but still adrenal

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nb-peace · 2 years

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And Now My Pointless Thoughts I During Thor: Love and Thunder.

Spoilers. Duh.

Has Christian Bale always had that mole near his eye?

Did they just flip that shot of him because now the moles on the other side

Huh I could of brought mum with me Korg just explained everything you need to know

What do I know that blue guy from? Checks IMDB. STEPHEN CURRY!!

I love when random Aussies show up in this shit.

I missed Jane in Ragnarok. I’ve shipped them form the start.

Hey did Darcey ever bring up what happened in Westview?

Darryl!! hey you know he Produces Bluey!

Well the Gradians went here that long were they. They had to come to Australia for that

Did Jeff Goldblum have to come to Australia just to be cut?

Hey Sif got her Comic book Costume.

So why did Thor have to change in to the blue and gold outfit.

How come we have never heard of Heimdall’s son before?

I like Jane and Val are friends. We Don’t have enough female friends ships in the MCU.

This place looks cool and I cant wait for New Rockstars to tell me who everyone is.

Were do I know the blond next to Zeus from. Checks IMDB. BELLA FOR H20 JUST ADD WATTER!!

I don't know what Russell Crow is doing here but I'm for it.

That's Australia's ass.

I like how may cuts to the Maori goddess there was I see what you did there Taika.

Yay they kissed. But sad because she's sick.

Well the shadow realm looks sick. But is it as sick as Yu-Gi-Oh ‘s shadow realm?

Where did tent come from? they were just out side now there in a tent?

Fuck Christian Bale is killing this shit.

So now the axe stops acting like a bitch.

Don't do ultimatums that doesn't end well.

I am all for the kid fighting these cunts. Especially the girl with the bunny and the one dressed as a fairy.

“IT IS MIGHTY THOR. OR IF THATS TO HARD DOCTOR JANE FOSTER”

This place looks the opposite of the place you go when you get the soul stone.

Fuck Then for killing Jane but wouldn't be surprised if Natalie didn't want to come back for another movie.

So Val still didn't get a girlfriend.

Gee Taika must love a good pun whit the Dwayne the Rock in this and the German Shepperd's joke in Jojo Rabbit.

So Sif cant get a robot arm Like Bucky?

And are we going to find out where she was during Ragnarok?

It is very cute that Chris's daughter is playing Love.

And she still has her Aussie accent.

Thor you were just holding the box you count get Pancakes right?

Well the name is very literal isn't it.

Hey its the guy from Ted Lasso.

Okay this might be a long shot but. Isn't it in Norse Mythology that they don't believe Valhalla is forever? Don't they believe Ragnarok will come and they will be reincarnated? and hasn't that happened in the comic books?

So is there a possibility that Jane and Heimdall and the other gods could be back?

Also if they have to die in battle to get to Valhalla dose that mean Odins not there?

And lastly WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DICKHEADS ON ABOUT THAT MOVIE IS GOOD!! SOMETIMES THINGS CAN JUST BE FUN!!

Now to get to fanficton to get back on my Jane and Thor shit.

#thor love and thunder #Thor #Mighty Thor #jane foster #marvel #thor/jane #thane #MCU #avangers #taika waititi #chris hemsworth #natalie portman #Christian Bale #movie

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