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imthefailedartist · 2 years

Text

Rambling Thoughts. Spoilers.

Wow it looks like a real movie.

There is proper lighting and cinematography. Wow.

I hate how he's walking through this field.

Amira Vann is a performer.

Should've killed her grandaddy.

Too much narration.

These letters a little too detailed. Show don't tell.

I'm gon be honest, Tyler is the last person on earth who should tackling race.

I know Buster don't think Willie Earl is his child. Sir your colorism and self hatred can't be that severe that you think Bayou is half white. Sir! Open your eyes. He called him HALF BREED! Bruh. Delusional men are pure comedy.

I like that he calls her Lil Anne

Bayou is not it. I just don't think he's worth all the drama. He is boring. He doesn't even write songs. For a movie called A Jazzmans Blues Bayou has no interest in music. He doesn't write songs/music or play an instrument. Paper Airplanes isn't even written by him. He doesn't even really take singing seriously its just something he does.

Ooh he on that stuff.

Bucket better watch who she put her hands on. We know your truth and the only ones who gone help you.

Bayou has no stage presence. I'm not braving the Chicago winters to see a ni**a standing still. Willie Earl on the other hand, stage presence but I hate him so I never want to see him win.

"We don't allow coloreds to sit at our table". Sir that is the kitchen table! That is for the servants to sit and prep it is not the dining room table.

Soon as her momma said that lie Leanne should've blew up their spot. "Okay mama. Okay. Well guess what, we are negroes."

They stopped the car cut it off slammed doors, threw up, swap stories get back in cut the car back on and not once does Willie Earl wake up. Don't do drugs kids.

They never call it heroin. Why? It can't possibly change the rating to call it by name over showing the needle in his arm.

Ira do know he talking to a black man in the Jim Crow Era South?

Ira telling Bayou his survival story to tell him to survive so you can help others.

Me: Ira save that story for someone else. Bayou ain't got that dog in him.

Citsy is great. She needs more story.

This needs a good editing. It needed another script edit. Its much too long and the timeline gets a little jumbled. After Leanne comes back. I have no idea how much time has passed we needed more time with them at 16 & 17. This is where their performances shine. Also we needed them sneaking around more after she returns to see that it wasn't just puppy love taken too seriously.

This heffa bes better hope that baby don't come out chocolate.

Everything happens to Bayou. He is never in charge of his own story. He is very hard to root for. And the one time he makes his own choice it's the dumbest decision ever.

The Debbie Allen did the choreography for this movie and we never get to see it shine.

What is the audience of the Royale? Why are these white folks coming to see what seems like an all or majority Black Revue?

Only nine months have passed since he left?

Did she come to Hattie Mae for comfort and familiarity or because she was scared that baby was gon come out dark.

You can't take your aunty some money to make sure she is able to live and feed herself? Ni**a kill yourself.

How you the headliner but your brother, high out of his mind has more stage presence than you?

Bayou joins the military but it has no effect on his character. It doesn't make him braver or stronger or more sensitive. He just joins and immediately gets out.

Ira wasn't on heroin? Then what the hell was wrong with him? Heat stroke?

I think he's getting darker. She says about a baby the color of alabaster.

Baby the color of fresh fallen snow in Alaska, freshly painted apartment walls, unseasoned mashed potatoes, the color of the crowd at a Train concert

His momma: is he getting darker?

Ira saw him perform and thought he was the star compared to Willie Earl? Absolutely not. Now if it was that he had that sweet, innocent charm that would stretch across to white markets I could believe it but it wasn't so it's unbelievable.

Look I'm all for resilience in the face of adversity but as Tyler Perry himself once said. If you can't get peace where you are, MOVE. Hattie pack your shit and go.

How you mad cause you let heroin get in the way of you auditioning?

Being a woman is dangerous business. This man would rather kill her than just admit she couldn't stand The South. Imagine if he found out she was Black? He'd of killed her and the baby. Imagine if that baby came out brown. They'd have burned the city down.

Her mom's crazy for bringing them back to the South. That's the one place where black folks are in abundance. Passing is easiest when you isolate. That's what's missing from this story. The husband and sheriff are never suspicious.

This movie is too long to cut that out. We should've seen more of her life with her husband and bonding with Citsy.

So she's a quarter or a half? What is her mama?

Bayou is a fool. Not a fool, a damn fool. Why the hell would you go back to Georgia?

Willie Earl ain't shit.

Yeah, Bayou is not worth all this. Neither is Leanne.

There should've been more cuts to the eighties.

See you gotta be careful who you have ya kids around. How you 50-75% percent Negro and racist.

Tyler really put effort into this movie. The sets fell and look real.

Someone said Leanne aged like a yt woman and said that was her punishment? Y'all!!! I laughed.

Did Hattie give him the letters because he's her grand baby and she's tired of his racist bullshit or because she was serious about the investigation?

I did not need the nurse pointing out who he was.

The credit version of Paper Airplanes is really beautiful.

#a jazzmans blues #tyler perry #Joshua boone #amirah vann #solea pfeiffer #austin scott #ryan eggold #jazz music #blues music #1940s aesthetic #the south #georgia #historical romance #historical fiction #jim crow

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every1studio · 4 years

Text

“vampire lords” [ateez]

genre: misc. + a lil suggestive + otome-styled (reverse harem)

ficstyle: bulletpoints (fem reader)

prompt: inspired VAMPIRE PRINCES INSPIRED BY OTOME GAME ROYAL BLOOD

note: sorry for the wait! I’m officially back and I’ll be posting as often as I possibly can!!!

Let’s meet the heirs of the vampire lineage. Who would you choose to be your lover and take over ruling the vampire clan?

-HONGJOONG

(type: the reliable, “leader-worthy” heir that gets picked on by the other princes; known for being a flirt)

(special power: psychometry - the ability to learn anything about the past or future of an object by touching it)

the one that you met first

after talking with your father, the Earl, about your living conditions here at the estate, you took it upon yourself to explore the premises

upon walking around the vampire estate, you heard a dramatic yet gentle melody that belonged to an old harpsichord

the melody sounded nostalgic even though you don’t remember hearing anything so hauntingly beautiful

you followed the sound into a glass greenhouse where the harpsichord sat in the middle of the room

you were entranced with the man playing his heart away

all you could see was his body swaying to and fro with his fingers dancing across the keys

his hair was slicked back and shined sapphire blue in the moonlight

his strong brows furrowed as he played the instrument

the keys he played were furious yet calming; like the beginning of a storm

his hands were adorned with black, sleek gloves

as if he was telling a story about his life; the good, the bad, and the bloody

you don’t know how long you were standing there but when the music stopped, you met the eyes of the man playing the harpsichord

“you must be Y/N...” he asked as he stepped towards you; his footsteps echoed in the spacious greenhouse

his eyes glimmered red every time he was in the moonlight

you nodded but unable to speak or move

his aura was intimidating yet alluring

but the moment he smiled, you felt like you were safe in this unknown place

“I’m Hongjoong~ I’ve heard all about you from the Earl! let me know if you need ANYTHING!”

you broke out into a smile but before you could say anything...

Hongjoong brushed the hair away from the nape of your neck with his gloved hand and leaned in real close, so close that you could feel his breath of your skin

“and when I mean, anything.. I mean anything... princess~”

you stumbled back away from him, “I-I’ll make s-sure th-that I’ll let you k-know when..”

he was good-looking; seemed playful and almost flirty behind his initial scary demeanor

he had you flustered

Hongjoong chuckled as he took off one of his gloves and reached to place his hand on your face

but....

will you choose his story?

or will you choose someone else?

-SEONGHWA

(type: an enigma, no one really knows about him except for the other princes; the oldest)

(special powers: shape-shifting and illusion-making)

“stop teasing our guest..”

you heard a voice coming from behind you

Hongjoong dropped his hand and cocked his head in annoyance, “I’m doing no such thing, I’m just making sure our guest is welcomed, that’s all..”

you saw a living and breathing sculpture

you felt your jaw gaping; you couldn’t help it

“you can do that with your gloves on.. you don’t want to invade our guest’s privacy, don’t you?”

as soon as the mysterious man’s sharp gaze lowered to meets yours, you quickly looked away

“I hope he wasn’t making you feel uncomfortable.. please excuse his behavior..I’m Seonghwa..” he places his hand on his chest and gives you a curt bow

you returned the bow, “I’m Y/N..”

Seonghwa gives you a subtle smile that you didn’t know he could be capable of, “I know who you are...”

he adjusts his outfit and held his hand out for you to take

“do you mind if I gave you a little tour, miss Y/N?”

you nodded as you placed your hand into his

“tch.. I was gonna offer if you weren’t already here... when will you stop having impeccable timing..” Hongjoong rolled his eyes as he walked back to the harpsichord with his hands in his pockets

“when you stop flirting as much as you breathe”

with that Seonghwa led you away from the greenhouse

he gave you a grand tour of the estate starting from the gated entrance

Seonghwa was short with his words but they were endearing

but as he gave you the tour, you noticed a couple of things

he always had a couple of crows fly to him every so often

and he seemed to have a problem with mirrors and reflections

usually every time you come across one, you would at least give a quick look but Seonghwa seemed to avoid them as much as possible

“miss Y/N.. is there something on my face?”

“hmm? no? why do you ask?”

Seonghwa leaned in a little closer to you and said, “you’ve been looking at me more than you’re looking at where you’re walking...”

you started to become a tomato and you could see him sneak a subtle smile

“just kidding, miss..” he murmured and continued to give you the tour

he was truly mysterious; he was friendly but you could tell that he wanted some distance between how he seems like to you and how he really is

....

will you choose his story to find out why?

or will you choose someone else?

-YUNHO

(type: boy-next-door; doesn’t seem like a vampire at all, but has a sensitive, fragile and frightening side)

(special power: alchemy)

“Seonghwa~ the Earl is calling for you- oh! hi Y/N!” the voice came from a tall man

out of two of the other vampire princes that you met, he seems the least like a vampire; he seems like he would be in on a college campus getting some beers for a party

“oh is that so.. please excuse me, miss Y/N.. I will have to conclude this tour to a halt-”

“a tour? I can guide her through the rest of the way.. leave it to me~” the tall puppy-like man gave a comedic salute to Seonghwa

Seonghwa nods, places his hand on his chest and bows, “I apologize for the unexpected inconvenience.. I’ll leave this miss Y/N in your hands, Yunho”

with that, Seonghwa left

leaving you with a giddy Yunho, “I’m guessing Seonghwa started the tour from the entrance right?”

“yeah he did!” you couldn’t help but answer with a smile since he’s already smiling

“so all that’s left is the east wing~ shall we?” he stuck his arm out for you to loop your arm through

you giggled at his enthusiasm as you looped your arm through his

you realized that he’s not the textbook definition of what a vampire looks like

which played pretty well since you could feel comfortable talking to him just about anything

the way he talked felt so familiar even though it’s the first time you met him; he was probably going to be someone you can lean on

you two made a final stop in front of a pair of heavy-set steel doors; no other room in the estate had these kind of doors

“this is my room~ the one room you CANNOT enter.. NO MATTER WHAT! OK?” Yunho tried to be playful to lay down the rule because he didn’t want to seem pushy

“what if I need a late night chat?” you tried to match his playfulness but that backfired

his eyes hid behind his bangs and he stood between you and the door

“my room is none of your business.. there’s no need for you to waltz inside, just knock on my door.. but you better not go inside, Y/N.. promise me you won’t come into my room...promise me now”

his voice lowered a couple of octaves and even though he hid his eyes you could see a red glow through his bangs; this scared you, it was like he was a different person; he really seemed like a vampire

“I-I promise..”

and like a flip of a switch, Yunho went back to smiling and his eyes weren’t glowing blood red anymore, “good, well that’s the end of the tour! let me know if you need anything~ is there any place you want to check out?”

you were still shaken up by his switch in character, you needed a break from it

“I’ll just walk around.. don’t mind me.. thank you Yunho~” you waved at him and went on your way...

...

will you choose his story and learn his secret?

or will you choose someone else?

-YEOSANG

(type: shy but romantic; a bookworm)

(special powers: telepathy and telekinesis)

to take your mind off of things, you went to the library and thankfully you were blessed with good memory so you knew where the library was

you pushed the heavy doors of the library and you were amazed; it was better than any library you’ve ever seen

there were bookshelves that were lined with books all the way up to high ceiling

you walked around the library like it was an unknown wonderland

there were spiraling stairs and aesthetic reading areas; this library would rival any others out there in the world

you were running your fingers along the spine of the books until you came across a secluded reading area

there were two tall leather armchairs; one of them were stacked with books and the other was occupied by a sleeping beauty

it seemed like he was sleeping; his head was rested on propped up arm with his book in his lap

you got closer to him and squatted down to see his face; you thought his profile was beautiful enough but now that you’re closer, he’s even more beautiful than you’d ever imagine

you went to reach his face to see if he was actually real or not

“I’m not a statue..” he murmured as he caught your hand before you touched his face; his eyes were still closed

“h-how did you know I was here? do vampires have super-heighten senses?” you were caught by surprised and was rambling

you calmed down a little when you saw him open his eyes

all of the heirs probably had different colored red eyes but his were different; it was a true red with gold flecks that made it seem like he had gold splinters stuck in his irises

“you could say it’s something of the sort..” the man sits up straighter and cracks his neck to relieve some tension

“nice to meet you, miss Y/N.. I’m Yeosang..” he turns to face the books on the other chair and the books start putting themselves away on the shelves

then he turns to you and reaches his hand out

you take it thinking that he’s only reaching his hand to shake it but he pulls you up from the ground and wraps his other arm around your waist

“do you really think I look better up close?”

“HUH?” how can he read your mind? is this another vampire ability?

Yeosang realizes that he’s being more bold than he usually is and let go of you immediately and starts to fumble with the hem of his sleeves

“ ..it’s a special power of mine, my powers are only exclusive to me and no one else.. I apologize for intruding in your mind space.. I won’t do it again!”

apparently he was so embarrassed by his previous actions that he ran away, giving you no chance to say anything

“Yeosang?!” you reached out for him but he ran away at the speed of light

what a character, you thought to yourself

...

will you choose his story and find out what he was reading?

or will you choose someone else?

-SAN

(type: looks edgy and grungy at first but is really sentimental; is also the Phantom Thief, the modern-day Robin Hood)

(special power: magician)

after you left the library, you felt a little hungry so you went to go to the kitchen to find something to eat

the kitchen staff were exceptionally nice to you and left after they offered you a midday snack; there were finger sandwiches and cream puffs that were exactly made to your taste

“for a little one like you, you sure eat a lot”

you turned after choking on your cream puff from being startled

“hey, miss.. you okay?” the boy offered you some water to clear your throat

“y-yeah.. thank you-” you paused to wait for a name from the strong-featured man

you were slightly embarrassed to have such an exceptionally looking guy see you being a mess

“the name’s San, at your service, miss~” he showed an unexpectedly cute smile

geez are all the heirs perfect looking?

yes, yes they are

“sorry you had to see all of that..” you murmured at the raven-haired boy

it seemed like he just came from an intense workout; sweat glistened all over his body but he smelled like he just came out of a Versace cologne commercial

“it’s alright, miss.. hey, miss.. you okay?” he got close to your face after inspecting your flushed face and reddened ears but you nodded as you made space between the two of you

he thought maybe he made you feel uncomfortable or maybe it was just a little awkward or maybe he made you upset in anyway; he needed to break the ice

“hey miss, do you like magic?” San sat in the seat next to you as he crossed his legs

“magic? like harry potter’s kind of magic?” you pondered as your doe-eyes sparkled in confusion but your eyes couldn’t meet his

“no like, a magician’s ”magic”.. you know like rabbits in a top hat and stuff like that..” San started to get giddy

“oh... yeah... I know what you’re talking about.. but why did you ask?”

he was ready to knock you out of your socks; he stretched out his arms, pretending to stretch

“well you seem a little..” softly brushing your hair behind your ear, “distracted..”

he pulled a beautiful amulet from your hair; your eyes widened in shock

it’s not like he’s wearing sleeves to hide such a fairly large amulet; the jewelry really appeared out of thin air

“you can keep it, miss~ think of it as a welcoming present from yours truly~ see ya later~” San waved at you as he walked out of the room

“wait! this looks expensive! where did you get this? how did you do that-” when you walked out of the room to chase after him, he was no where to be found

...

will you choose his story and find out how he did that?

or will you choose someone else?

-MINGI

(type: gentle beast; only smiles for you; known to others as the vampire assassin)

(special powers: invisibility and hawk-eyes; can switch eye-sight from x-ray, temperature, to long-range)

you were still confused about San’s magic trick

unable to pay attention to where you were going

cue the cliche scene where you trip on your way downstairs to the large dance floor of a lobby

you squeeze your eyes shut but instead of a deadly and nasty fall, you fell onto someone with a strong build

“miss Y/N, you should watch where you’re going..” the deep voice of your savior made you a little too scared to open your eyes

“are you hurt, miss Y/N?” although his voice was deep, it was filled with care

you slowly opened your eyes and saw his soft eyes that looked like they were a pair of Madagascar rubies

“n-no.. I’m not.. I’m sorry.. I should’ve watched where I was going..” you tried to shift yourself away so that you weren’t leaning on him for support anymore but you almost fell, again

the deep-voice man held your hand so that you wouldn’t fall, “let me at least escort you down the stairs, we can’t have anything bad happen to the Earl’s daughter...”

“thank you... I’m not used to these steep stairs yet..” you murmured; you probably have a permanent blush by now

“it’s nice to finally meet you, miss Y/N.. my name is Mingi-”

the sound of the harpsichord could be heard from where you two were

“Hongjoong must still be playing music...”

Mingi nods and turns back to you, “he could play for hours.. miss Y/N? since we’re here on the dance floor, would you mind if I asked for a dance?”

you looked everywhere but at him, “i-if you insist.. it would be a waste of this music and this dance floor...”

without another word, he slips his hand on the small of your waist and interlocked your small hand in his

you felt like you were Belle and he was the Beast; from Beauty and the Beast

it was like you were at a ball, wearing a stunning dress that swayed to follow Mingi’s lead

the fact that he was only looking at you and smiling at you made you believe that Mingi wasn’t as scary as you thought

he spun you out but you felt another hand take you away from Mingi’s

...

will you choose his story and continue to dance with him?

or will you choose someone else?

-WOOYOUNG

(type: kind of childish; is uninterested in many things except for you because he’s met you before)

(special powers: teleportation and mind-control; to control someone physically but not mentally/emotionally after consuming their blood)

you completely let the other person pull you away from Mingi and carried you like a princess

“you should be careful of him, miss Y/N.. he’s a very dangerous assassin, you know~”

you looked up as you were still being carried; if looks could kill, you would be dead by now

but from your angle, you can’t really make out his full face

“if miss Y/N should be careful of anyone here, it would be you...” Mingi rolled his eyes as he got closer to you and your carrier

the male stuck his tongue out at Mingi and started to dash away

“you’re just mad because you got her taken from you.. sorry, not sorry, but dancing with Mingi is one of the most BORING thing you could ever do~”

before Mingi could get to you, you were shrouded in a poof of a cloud

when the cloud cleared up, you could tell you were in another part of the estate

“you can teleport?” you asked

but then when you saw his face clearly, you wanted to ask another question, sadly you missed your timing

“wow, you’re not even gonna ask what my name is..” the man places you gently onto a plush sofa

you looked around the room; this must be the common area

“I’m Wooyoung, at your service~” he bows quite dramatically

“I’m guessing you already know my name..” you grabbed a pillow for comfort

Wooyoung sat right next to you and started to twirl with a strand of your hair, “I know more than your name..”

your eyes opened and got close to him, “you can read minds too? have we’ve met before? did we meet in another life?”

Wooyoung started to laugh at your cute remarks, “no I can’t, that’s Yeosang’s thing... but I’m glad that you were thinking about me~”

Wooyoung cupped your face with his veiny hands and got real close, “we’ve met before.. when we were kids..”

your excitement caused your forehead to slam into his

“really?! when?! what happened?! I don��t really remember!”

although you were fine, Wooyoung’s forehead was throbbing

“my head is spinning now, there’s no way I can tell you~” he half-teased, half-spoke the truth

“what?! no way... is there anything I can do to help you?” you were concerned; you have always been hardheaded... literally

Wooyoung lowered his chocolate red-brown eyes and snickered under his breath, “if you give me a kiss and make it better, I’ll tell you~”

you got up from your seat; blushing, of course, “what are you a kid?! forget it!”

“wait, miss Y/N.. I was just kidding!”

you darted out of the room

...

will you choose his story and go back to find out how you two met before?

or will you choose someone else?

-JONGHO

(type: rarely talks but watches out for you; unlimited strength and does anything you ask of him)

(special power: blood absorption; the ability to absorb blood and/or use it to convert into anything)

you didn’t know how long you ran for but you turned up in the rose garden, which looked exceptionally beautiful at night; your heart stopped beating at the speed of light and you felt relaxed in the midst of the rose bushes

there was an exquisite gazebo in front of a moonlit-sparkling lake so you sat there and thought about how you got to this place

how you left the place you called home to get back in touch with your father

how your father was the leader of vampires; which meant you were half-vampire, half-human

how your were suppose to marry one of the vampire heirs to stay protected from the other creatures who want your powers

it was a lot to take in

you walked closer to the lake to look at your reflection; looking at the glowing red eyes you were always made fun of for, wondering where you got them from

sure they weren’t as bright as the other vampires but they were still red

you were lost in thought; unable to detect the large man-eating koifish swimming up towards you

by the time you realized there were another pair of eyes staring back at you from under the water, it would be too late to jump back to safety

you felt a fast gust of wind as someone got in front of you

they placed their hand into the fish’s mouth and pushed it down; causing the lake’s water to form into tsunami-like waves away from the person in front of you

the fish shriveled up and turned to ashes that blew away with the night’s cool breeze

everything happened so fast; your knees finally gave out from shock and you sat onto grass that thrived next to the lake

“miss. Y/N...” the person called out

because of the moonlight, all you could make out was a man with a muscular build and a pair of glowing dark red eyes

he reached out for you but you flinched

this man had incredible strength and was scared that if he touched you, you would become like the fish

he was hurt by your action but took his hand back, “there are dangerous creatures lurking in the waters.. please be careful.. miss Y/N..”

you couldn’t help but feel bad, he saved you but you can’t even bring yourself to even thank him

“um thank you!” you finally had the courage to get up to talk to him

that was when the moonlight hit his face and not his back, you could finally see his face

he had his own charming looks; despite of his physically and powers, he was pretty baby-faced and when he smiled back at you, you felt your heart skip a beat

“you’re welcome, miss Y/N.. my name is Jongho.. welcome to the Aurora estate..”

he walked alongside with you back into the castle but never said a word

sure, it was quiet.. but it wasn’t awkward

...

will you choose his story to find out more about him?

or will you continue the story to choose later?

[ masterlist + guidelines ]

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raccoon-wizard · 5 years

Text

Crossovers no one asked for:

MCU × Good Omens

(Imma ignore the entirety of IW and Endgame for this)

Loki is best friends with Crowley (misundrestood chaotic snake bros!) and they share the stories of their Traumatic Past with each other.

Aziraphale is the first person ever to actually sit down and help Steve (and later Bucky as well) catch up on everything he missed. Crowley helps too when Azi trails off too much, but the boys actually enjoy listening to the tiny details that the demon rolls his eyes at. It makes the stories feel much more real.

Wanda and Anathema hit it off super well (witch sisters!), making Newt feel a little jealous.

Tony tries to (hopelessly) teach Newt to do some basic computer stuff, but after an incident involving Friday's server and a soggy Earl Gray teabag, he gives up.

Pepper immediately bonds with Natasha, becoming even scarier than before after spending some time keeping her company while training.

Wensleydale sneaks into Bruce's lab and almost gives him a heart attack, but after he realises that the poor boy was just curious, he hesitantly shows him around while he rambles about comic books.

Peter introduces the Them to the Spidey gang and they become best friends.

MJ shows Pepper some trivia about her favourite murders and she becomes evEN SCARIER SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE THIS CHILD AWAY FROM HERE, screams Tony as he hides Morgan behind his back.

Ned is really intimidated by Adam at first, but soon he finds out that he is also a huge nerd and loves sci-fi so they become really close.

Peter shows Crowley the Snek video (you KNOW which one), to which the demon only sighs in exaspearation. He attempts to adopt the boy (we all know that this moron has a soft spot for kids) and Tony beats him with a broom when he finds out.

Newt kind of... turns Vision off. That's it. Tony cries. He has never seen such a disaster of a human being.

Dog, for some reason, gets really attached to Thor, which pisses off Rocket since there's something about that weird thing that he can't quite put his finger on. He is also drawn to Adam and even lets the boy pet him, confusing everyone present.

Azi tries to impress Stephen with his magic tricks and when it doesn't work, Crows shows up with some real convoluted demon magic, freaking the poor man out.

On the other hand, Anathema's sweet curiosity absolutely charms (pun intended) Stephen. He agrees to show her some basic stuff and is surprised to find Agnes Nutter in one of his books. Anathema is as shocked as he is.

Clint trolls the shit out of Shadwell. Scott helps him.

Mantis takes it as her responsibility to make the Ineffable Idiots realise their undying love for each other. She tries to be subtle, but it only works on Aziraphale since he is Totally Clueless. As is Crowley, but even he can decipher the bug lady's hints. He blushes and one time, he turns into a snake out of embarrassment.

Groot attempts to befriend Dog. He succeeds.

Pepper and Pepper cause a whole lot of confusion.

Loki forms a strange bond with Madame Tracy since she reminds him of Frigga despite NOT being able to do magic like she says. She calls him a "dear boy" and makes him tea. Loki smiles at her softly and laughs his butt off when Thor tries to achieve the same but gets rejected.

Azi and Scott show each other their magic tricks. The angel is happy to finally have someone to share this interest with. (Looking at you, Crowley!)

One time, Drax unknowingly picks up snake Crowley up to befriend him (he likes snakes ok) and the demon is too embarrassed to change back, so he patiently waits for someone (Aziraphale) to save him.

Crowley meets Killgrave and chaos ensues.

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hatingwithfears · 5 years

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Top Albums of 2018: 10-2

10. EARL SWEATSHIRT- SOME RAP SONGS

I know there’s been plenty of articles written over the last few years about the Odd Future collective growing up and making more mature music (Tyler The Creator’s album from last year was a welcome surprise, and Frank Ocean’s Blonde is on it’s way to being era defining album), and Earl Sweatshirt’s new album is his strongest album yet, and one of the best to come from the collective.

In less than half an hour, Earl Sweatshirt and his producers bring back the soul sample beats that JDilla was well known for. Some Rap Songs wouldn’t exist without JDilla’s work, and the respect for older hip-hop and R&B is distorted by Earl with each song being stunningly short. Earl’s songwriting is potent, dealing with his father’s death, depression and doubt. The simple title Some Rap Songs is direct, and misleading at the same time.

Rating: 9.4

9. THE 1975- A BRIEF INQUIRY INTO ONLINE RELATIONSHIPS

Is this the millennial OK Computer? How insincere is that criticism? Am I assuming this based off the the middle track “The Man Who Married A Robot”? (Or the fact that the song goes from being Radiohead’s “Fitter Happier” to the final moments of “Motion Picture Soundtrack” in five minutes).

Is this a rock album? Of course it is. (Note: if you think this band ISN’T a rock group, your ideas what rock and roll is are too constrained).

The criticism about the album’s structure isn’t working for me. This album’s strongest moments are it’s biggest, from the frantic “Give Yourself A Try”, to the straight ahead lounge jazz of “Mine”. While some of the ambient moments from their other album are here, A Brief doesn’t was much time, even in it’s ballads, like the closer “I Always Wanna Die Sometimes” (it sounds like “Wonderwall”!). “I Couldn’t Be More in Love” is a great gospel, R&B sounding track complete with backing choir. And yeah, “Love It If We Made It” is one of the greatest songs of the year.

Rating: 9.4

8. KAMASI WASHINGTON- HEAVEN AND EARTH

An album that throws together the biggest sounds that jazz can currently offer, this album isn’t quite up the grandness of Washington’s previous album, The Epic. Heaven and Earth is still a huge undertaking that respects where jazz has been with artists like Coltrane, Sun Ra, and Keith Jarrett being referenced, but the fury of the times shows up in Washington’s playing. The grand scale carries for two and half hours (there’s a bonus disc that has nice rendition of “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow”). Many of the songs here are eight, nine minutes long, even moments that are more relaxed are grand sounding.

Rating: 9.4

7. DAUGHTERS- YOU WON’T GET WHAT YOU WANT

On their first album in eight years, noise rock group Daughters hold nothing back here, as they pummel through these songs with urgency. The noisy guitars, and angry vocals are still here, but it’s more constructed than their previous works, thanks to the perfect production (the bass on some songs drones on while still keeping the beat). The clarity in the production also show how the group has changed their dynamics, with this even more industrial sound that could soundtrack an apocalypse. There’s no two songs that are alike, but the overall feeling is a suffocating one that never settles.

Rating: 9.4

6. GAZELLE TWIN- PASTORAL

Experimental noise artist Gazelle Twin takes the horror of her music, and applies that energy to make an album critical of Brexit, and England. Pastoral is the jittery, messy album that takes current times, and distorts them into older ideas. The artist’s look is one of a court jester, and the album cover has countryside look with a distorted font in a yellow box, similar to one classical music label.

Gazelle Twin takes these “classic” touchstones and fucks them over. It’s a brutally critical album that never sacrifices musical experimentation for powerful lyrics. Pastoral’s Brexit landscape is a gross one, but it’s also very, very real.

Rating: 9.5

5. TIM HECKER- KONOYO

Tim Hecker’s work as a composer has always been a play between light and dark (look at the darkness of his 2014 album, Virgins, or the brightness of his 2016 album, Love Streams). Konoyo goes down the same path, but it’s a more meditative state (NPR says the album “beckons the sublime”) than anything Hecker has worked in before. This album was recorded mainly in Tokyo using a traditional Japanese instrument, a gagaku, that Hecker distorts, slows down, and lets drone over a good portion of Konoyo. It’s a creepy album that never quite settles, even when it seems like it does.

Rating: 9.5

4. MOUNT EERIE- NOW ONLY

A year after putting out A Crow Looked At Me, Mount Eerie’s new album continues the subject matter of his wife’s death. It’s a bleak look at times, Now Only isn’t quite as mournful, as the songwriter seems to have taken a page from Sun Kil Moon and rambling lyrics about whenever one is at that moment. Some songs are huge pieces that have the songwriter still singing directly to his late wife in second person. The emotion has shifted, The mourning has changed leaving us, the listener, going through these six songs in a less intrusive manner than Mount Eerie’s previous album. With these longer tracks, like “Two Paintings By Nikolai Astrup”, art itself is used to remember.

Rating: 9.5

3. LOW- DOUBLE NEGATIVE

I haven’t heard an album sound this goddamn good on headphones since Fever Ray’s debut in 2009.

Damn it, I’m not even terribly familiar with the band’s catalog (They’ve been around for 25 years). This doesn’t change the fact that I heard some of the greatest production of the decade on Double Negative. This album is heavy, distorted, hypnotic, even ominous at times. The songs here work more as sound experiences than songs, even with the great single “Always Trying to Work It Out”.

Rating: 9.6

2. BLOOD ORANGE- NEGRO SWAN

Blood Orange has crafted a work that goes through many stages, but places importance behind all of them. With the care of a classical musician (yes, while there instances of strings and winds on this album, the care is more minute, and only started to make sense after many, many listens (there’s also a video of Haynes interviewing Philip Glass, so he carries an understanding of classical music)) Haynes has put together an album that’s somehow even more relevant than Freetown Sound. It’s a softer album than his other work, it’s also more spiritual and open than anything else that he’s done.

Rating: 9.7

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