#feedback appreciated <3

[becca-alexa]

Baby, It's Cold

Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

Summary: You’re snowed in with no heat, so you suggest sharing body heat to keep from freezing - but how far will things go between you and Steve?

Word Count: 6.3K

Content Warnings: p in v sex, general smut, cursing, consensual touching

Author’s Note: feedback appreciated!! i don't have much experience writing stuff like this, and i figured practice makes perfect 💗

    It was a miracle Robin had managed to snag the cabin - who in their right mind would ever rent out an entire villa in the woods to a bunch of twenty-somethings? It was unheard of, or so she claimed, because none of them could get her to shut up about how well she'd haggled for the place, how she'd bartered with the owner over coffee and used her mile-a-minute voice to confuse them into signing off on them staying the weekend.

    The place was far, far outside of Hawkins, an urgently-welcome retreat for all of you after what had proved to be the most difficult year of your lives. Nancy, Robin, Jonathan, Argyle, Eddie, you and Steve - you'd all made plans to meet up and drive over together; Eddie had given his van a well-needed tune up specifically for this trip, so that it could handle everyone and everything in one go. But, as was quickly - annoyingly - becoming the norm with your group, your plans fell through… sort of.

    "What do you mean, you're stuck in Indy?" Steve tried to keep his voice down as he balanced the payphone receiver against his ear, hands shoved into the pockets of his jean jacket as he braced himself against the cold. "Robbie, we've been planning this trip for weeks-"

    "I know, I know!" Robin hurriedly replied; you tried not to giggle too loudly as Steve rolled his eyes. "But Nancy had this thing she needed to pick up, and Eddie had offered to drive us, then Jonathan and Argyle wanted to tag along-"

    "What, so you didn't think to tell me about your little day trip?" Steve dragged a hand through his styled hair, shifted from one leg to the other, slapping a hand against his thigh in exasperation. Can you believe her?, he mouthed to you, biting back a grin when you shook your head.

    "Just go with [Y/N]!" Robin insisted - and in retrospect, you'd realize she'd insisted a bit too intently, but you weren't thinking of that now.

    What you were thinking of was how in Heaven's name were going to survive the entire three-hour drive up to the cabin, alone with Steve Harrington.

    Your best friend, your bat-wielding protector, the sole object of your desires - Hell, he was the only crush you'd ever had, and even after so many years, your affections for the man still ran as deep as ever.

    "Robin says they'll meet us at the cabin tomorrow." Steve asked, holding the phone away from his face as he turned toward you, head falling to the side, hair bouncing over his face. "That okay with you?"

    "T-That's fine." You reply with a nod, staring at the lock that had fallen over his forehead, and you prayed he hadn't picked up on how your voice had cracked.

    "You owe us, Robbie." Steve replied gruffly, but you knew there was no bite to his words. "Seriously this time."

    "Sure, sure! Whatever!" Robin hurriedly replied; from where you were standing, you could barely make out what sounded like Argyle… shouting at someone? "Drive safe!"

    "Rob-" The line went dead, loudly buzzing in his ear; Steve groaned as he all but slammed the receiver against the payphone, his brows furrowing as he began to lose himself in his thoughts. You took a step toward him, bridging the gap that'd been left between you; your fingers were soft as they brushed over his skin, trailing over the soft hair covering his forearm, pulling him out of his own head.

    "Steve, it'll be fine." Your voice was quiet, and you hoped it'd calm him down - the last thing you needed was Steve driving up a rugged, unfamiliar mountain upset. "We'll try calling again when we get there, okay?"

    He nodded, blinking at the warm smile you gave him - your smiles were always warm, always gentle, but every time he'd be graced with it, he'd remind himself not to get too excited.

    You smiled at everyone like that, he'd convinced himself, desperate to believe it were true, that the look of pure sunshine on your face wasn't just for him - because how could it be?

    It was, but that's another story.

    You walked to his car, your pace picking up to a jog as the bitter cold sunk through your clothes. Steve beat you to it, holding the door open for you.

    "Ever the gentleman, huh?" You teased, climbing into the seat and pulling the heavy thing shut behind you.

    Had you hesitated just for a moment longer, you'd have caught how Steve burned at your words, how he'd licked his dry lips nervously as his mind froze up, hands trembling as they fisted at his sides.

    You weren't the only one with a lingering crush.

    Taking a steeling breath, he walked over to the driver's side, hands cupped over his mouth as he shut the door, working desperately to stave off the chill biting at his fingertips.

    "Ready?" The car roared to life beneath his hands, the sound a welcome comfort ahead of your long journey; you cranked the heating up to the highest setting. Again, you smiled at him, fuzzy and soft; he smiled in return, and he pulled the car out of the gas station parking lot and onto the main road.

    You'd been driving for hours.

    "You find it yet?" asked Steve, glancing at you for what felt like the millionth time as you scanned the map creased and wrinkled atop your lap, your brows furrowed in concentration as you traced your finger over one of many wiggling lines.

    "There should be a road up ahead on the left…" You mumbled in reply, flipping the map upside down, this way and that. Should you have brought a compass? "Maybe the right…? No, wait, definitely the left."

    "You sure?" Steve asked hesitantly - he'd driven through more open country roads and empty spatterings of woods than he could remember; in the dark, he couldn't even tell he was driving uphill.

    "You don't trust my cartography skills, Harrington?" Your lifted your brow, your tongue sticking out of the corner of your pressed lips. "Take the next left, then it should be at the end of the road."

    "I trust you, but this baby's only got so much gas." You laughed at him, clear and pleasant, his smile widening at the sound of it. "Here?"

    "Yeah, turn here."

    The car jumped as it crossed off the main road and onto the dirt, leading up the side of whatever mountain you were on; Steve's hand flew out to hold you down before he could think to stop himself, and you clung to him as the jolting continued on, both of you only relaxing when the cabin finally came into view.

    And, boy, was it a view.

    "Robin got us this?" You exclaimed, gaping at the expansive cabin before you, eyes sparkling as Steve turned the interior light on. "This is amazing!"

    "It's a cabin." Steve shrugged, and your head snapped to look at him - he sounded… unimpressed? "What? I think it's nice." You rolled your eyes at him and climbed out of the car; he followed closely behind, insisting he carry your bag, ignoring your protests against it altogether.

    As though the outside of the cabin wasn't impressive enough, the inside was lavish enough that even Steve was taken by surprise. Two floors, six bedrooms, wall-to-wall log paneling, a massive fireplace across the main living room stocked to overflow with cut firewood.

    "'S it still just nice?"

    "It's really nice."

    The both of you explored the space, running from room to room, gawking at the luxurious kitchen and the equally-massive wraparound deck leading out from it. And, having taken in your fill, the two of you begin making dinner - rather, Steve was making dinner and you were relegated to chopping and slicing duty, the conversation between you lighthearted and teasing.

    Midway through your simple stir-fry dinner, seated in the kitchen, you were the first to notice the change in the weather.

    "Steve," You nudged him, and he gave you a questioning look, stopping mid-chew to look at whatever you were pointing at. "It's snowing!"

    "Huh." His brows furrow, his gaze dropping to nothing. "The weather report didn't mention snow."

    "It shouldn't be too bad, right?" You tried to reassure him - and yourself, too - as you followed his train of thought. "They'll make it by tomorrow, for sure."

    "Yeah, for sure…" Steve didn't sound too convinced, but you didn't push the conversation further. Seeing as how he'd made dinner, you volunteered to do the dishes. And, ever the good friend, he'd kept you company, even drying off and putting away whatever you'd finished washing.

    "Steve, I said I was doing the dishes…" You huffed, pulling the damp towel slung over his shoulder and giving his chest a light-hearted swat.

    "What, I'm not allowed to help?" He danced around you, snatching back the towel, and you swiveled around to reach him; he lifted the towel far above your head, well out of your reach, laughing as you tried to jump for it.

    "Steve Harrington, give that back!"

    "Just let me-"

    Stricken mid-sentence, the lights flickered.

    You froze - you both did, Steve's arm an instant vice as he held you against his chest. Neither of you spoke, neither breathed as you listened for the tell-tale sounds of danger, of an unholy nightmare resurrected. You buried your face into the solid safety of his chest, clinging to his shirt as his eyes scanned the room. Several painful, heavy minutes passed before you slowly began to feel him relax, his hold on you loosening ever so slightly.

    "Let me go check the power…" he mumbled, his reluctance palpable as he left you alone, all but running down the hallway to where he'd remembered seeing a breaker box. Throwing it open, he flicked through every switch, yet the cabin remained shrouded in darkness.

    Shutting the panel door, and rounding the corner back into the kitchen, he narrowly missed being hit across the eye by the empty vase you'd commandeered as a weapon.

    "Whoa! Watch the face!" He jumped back, falling out of your swinging range. "The power's out. Snow must've knocked down a line or something." He explained, voice assured, and you sagged in relief at his words, hands visibly shaking as you set the vase back atop the counter. Without missing a beat, Steve stepped toward you, taking your hands in his own, enveloping them, his touch silently pleading you to look at him.

    "Hey," His voice was buttery-soft, gentle in a way he only ever used with you. "There's nothing here. It's just us."

    You shake your head, swallowing dryly, your head falling to your chest as you steadied the erratic beating of your heart. "Y-Yeah, you're right."

    Steve nodded, calling forth every fiber of his being to let you go, to lose the warmth he'd found in your touch. Together, you'd made the most of things - you remembered seeing a box of candles in one of the closets, a pack of matches tucked away between them all, and in no time at all, the living room was bathed in the flickering, golden glow of over a dozen flames. You sat atop the supple leather couch, a blanket wrapped around your shoulders as you watched Steve light the logs in the fireplace.

    You were cold, your hands tucked against you, the tips of your toes already feeling numb - and from the way Steve rubbed at his arms, he'd felt it, too.

    "Should we… uh…" You tried to ask, your own embarrassment shriveling your words before you could get them out, hands shaking as you tugged anxiously at your fingers. "I-I mean, it's cold, and the fireplace-"

    You gave him an exasperated look, but Steve - bless his athletic soul - wasn't following.

    You groaned, dragging your hands through your hair as you blurted out, "We should sleep here."

    "On the floor?"

    "Yes, Steven, on the floor." You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his shock. "We can take a couple blankets and make a bed. It'll be warmer here than in the bedrooms."

    Steve turned away from you, staring into the cackling fire. To you, he was considering what you'd said, his expression pensive, almost blank - to him, he was failing to quell his boiling panic at the thought of having to sleep with you… beside you? Whatever - either way, you would be much too close to him and he was not prepared. There were only so many rooms - and therefore only so many blankets - in the cabin, so he knew you wouldn't be able to make two separate beds.

    He had to sleep with you.

    "I-I mean, you're right…"

    You gave him a confused look. "...But?"

    Steve took a deep breath, turning back toward you, and he swore you could see the way his heart pounded in his throat. "No, nothing." He stood up, brushed off his jeans, tried for his best smile - which came through as more of a lopsided grin, but that's beside the point. "Let's get those blankets, huh?"

    Between the two of you, you were proud of the bed you'd made, cozy under the pile of blankets and pillows; splitting for a minute, you both readied for bed, changing into your pajamas, brushing your teeth in the kitchen - Steve sensed your lingering unease at being in there, so he stood closer to you than he normally would, his hand finding the small of your back as the two of you walked back to the living room.

    "Which side do you want?" You asked him, suddenly feeling shy at seeing him in nothing but a pair of loose sweatpants and an old Hawkins Phys-Ed shirt - and, unbeknownst to you, your clothes were having the same effect on him, your oversized shirt reaching your knees like an old nightgown.

    "Doesn't matter." He pulled at the drawstring of his pants, suddenly intent on looking everywhere but at you. "I'll sleep like a rock, anyway."

    You snorted a laugh and crawled into your side of the bed. "Yeah, and you'll keep me up all night with your snoring."

    "I do not snore!" Steve exclaimed, and you laughed even harder at him, obviously having touched a sore spot. "I don't!"

    "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Steve." He gave you a withering look, and you collapsed in a fit of giggles - nervous giggles, but he didn't need to know that. He shook his head at you as he crawled in under the blankets, close to you yet still keeping a respectable distance.

    "Candles stay on?" He knew what your answer would be, but he asked anyway, his chest tight as you nodded.

    "Unless it bothers you-"

    "Doesn't bother me, sweetheart." He froze, his breath catching - he'd overstepped. Called you the wrong thing, gotten too comfortable. He waited for you to shake your head, to roll your eyes at him and turn around.

    But, nothing came.

    Steve watched, hands itching from the ferocity of his fraying nerves as you nodded, quieter than usual, curling up on your side as you continued to face him. He laid on his side, toward you, hands bunching the blanket up to his face as he tried to relax - not that he'd be getting much sleep around you, but he could pretend, for your sake.

    Minutes pass, the soft sputtering of the candles a soft harmony to the loud, almost rhythmic cackling of the fireplace. Even in the muted light, you notice Steve trembling beneath the blankets.

    He was cold.

    "Steve?" you whispered, moving closer to him, the sudden drop in temperature making your stomach flip. "Steve, are you okay?"

    "Hm…?" His eyes are slow to open, his voice much more tired than it had been mere moments ago; he'd curled up tighter - you just barely felt how his knees were tucked up to his chest. "What?"

    "You're shivering." You continued to inch closer, your body all but touching his, and for the life of him, he couldn't remember how to move. "Why didn't you say anything?"

    "I was fine before…" he grumbled, shaking his head, his jaw clenched to keep you from hearing his chattering teeth. "'M fine, just go back to sleep."

    You gave him a hard-pressed look, gaze narrowed at the top of his lowered head; before you could convince yourself to do otherwise, you began to fumble about beneath the blankets. Steve cracked an eye open to watch, only to catch you flinging your shirt somewhere off to the side.

    He swallowed audibly, his mind racing - and crashing - as he felt your arms envelope him, your chest pressed to his with only the thin barrier of his shirt between you.

    "[Y/N], w-what are you-"

    "Body heat." Your answer came quickly, much to his surprise, your hands leaving smoldering trails as you rubbed them over his back. "You need to stay warm, Steve."

    He nodded, two thoughts about you dominating his mind:

You were much more selfless than you gave yourself credit for.

You weren't wearing much of anything under that shirt.

    He tried to think of something to do, something to say, but the unfiltered heat radiating off of your skin was too enticing, too overwhelming. He tried getting closer to you, chasing your warmth, but something felt off; something was holding him back.

    In a flash, he'd tossed his shirt aside, the aged fabric landing somewhere near yours.

    "Steve-"

    "Body heat, right?" God, he hoped he didn't sound too breathless. "We can keep each other warm."

    You weren't about to fight that logic, were you?

    He shuffled closer to you, arms settling loosely around your waist, the frigid feeling of his hands trailing over your bare skin sending a shiver through you. Between you, you'd moved your hands up - almost as a buffer, ridiculous as that seemed. But, now you were in a new predicament - your fingers wove through the matte of hair on his chest; you could feel each curl, each wisp as he breathed, your touch both featherlight and branding. His head fell to your shoulder, and his arms tightened over so slightly around you.

    "How are you so hot…?" Steve asked; his head shot up, and you were given an excellent view of the blush spreading up his neck as he quickly amended, "Warm, I mean. Shit, I- You're really warm. N-Not that you're not hot-"

    You giggled, the movement brushing your chest against his, pulling out a gasp from somewhere deep within him that he'd just barely managed to catch. "You're not half-bad yourself, Harrington." Feeling you relax, he tried to do the same, leaning further into you, the scent of your citrus shampoo lulling him into a pleasant sort of halfway-sleep.

    "Uh… H-Hey, Steve…?" He could hear your voice, distant and somewhat muffled, and he grinned against the comfort of your shoulder. "Steve, are you awake?"

    "Yeah…?" He peeled open his eyes, pulled away enough to look at you, confused for only a moment as he tried to follow the way your gaze flicked to the space between you - and when he did, he stopped breathing, his stomach dropping to his half-thawed toes as he sprang away from you, his scalding face clear in the candlelight, hands pressed tightly between his legs.

    "Shit! I- Goddamnit, [Y/N], I didn't… I swear, I wasn't-"

    You watched on, stunned silent as Steve worked himself into a whole-hearted frenzy, shaking as he desperately tried to explain away why he'd gotten hard sleeping with you.

    "Was that… is it my fault?" You couldn't help yourself - here you were, sharing a bed with the man of your dreams, who'd gotten painfully aroused with you in his arms. Your words were barely above a whisper as you continued, "Are you like that because of me?"

    Part of you wished you'd disappear, another thinking of what you had within arm's reach that could be used to tear your own tongue out because who in their right mind asks something like that? You stared at him, lip worried between your teeth, eyes catching the light like a million stars in the night; Steve realized he was at an impasse - you both were.

    It was now or never.

    "Yeah, I… I am."

    Nothing could have prepared you for his answer; you felt as though the floor had collapsed beneath you, turned to quicksand and swallowed you into its grainy depths.

    "Steve-"

    "I like you, [Y/N]."

    You couldn't help the gasp that tumbled past your lips, nor could you quell the sudden flood of tears swelling in your eyes. His words flew around in your head, dominated your thoughts, demanded every ounce of your attention.

    I like you.

    I like you.

    I like you.

    "[Y/N], don't… don't cry- Shit, I didn't…" He'd moved back to you the instant he'd caught the first tear, his arms wrapping back around you - he'd kept his hips turned away from you, the angle awkward, but you didn't notice. "C'mon, baby, I'm sorry-"

    You shook your head, your breathing hiccupped, stuttered as you wiped at your dripping face. To his surprise, you'd laughed, the sound as wet and sodden as it was bubbling.

    "Steve, I'm not… I'm not upset." You tried to tell him, reassure him, meeting his concerned gaze through glossy lashes.

    "But, you're crying-"

    You took his hand in both of yours, held it between your bodies like a tether between souls; he could feel your pulse through your palm, quick and solid and strong.

    "[Y/N]-"

    "I like you, too, Steve."

    He barely believed what he'd heard - you liked him? You'd reciprocated his feelings? The crush he'd been achingly, lovingly nursing since high school was… mutual?

    "Y-You… You do?" He hated how insecure he sounds, how hesitant and uncertain he was; you gave him another blinding smile, dropping your hands as you pressed your bare chest to his.

    "I do." You thank the Heavens above that your voice hadn't wavered - he heard you clear as day, the fluttering he'd feel whenever he was near you now a full-on avalanche of jittery emotion. "I… uh… I have for a while now."

    "Really?"

    You nodded, hiding your face into a lump of bunched-up blanket.

    "How long have you…?"

    "You first." You insisted, your stomach in knots at his shy smile.

    "Since freshman year, at least." Steve replied smoothly, his confidence returning in drips and splashes - it was better than nothing, he'd conceded. "Never thought you'd give me a chance, though."

    "God, I've liked you since, like, fourth grade…" You'd groaned into the blanket, goosebumps running over your body as you caught his soft exhale.

    "Seriously?" He couldn't believe it - you'd been hiding your feelings for him for almost a decade?

    How had he not noticed?

    You'd pulled your head up from the blanket pile just enough to look at him, and you both collapsed into a fit of nervous, giddy laughter, the little space left between your bodies shrinking away. Steve was the first to settle down, staring into the depths of your eyes with the look of a man drowning in his love; he brushed a lock of hair behind your ear as your legs tangled together, his rough and pleasantly scratchy against yours, and he waited for you to quiet down before asking, 

    "Is this alright?"

    His hands were at your hips, his thumbs running over the thin elastic band of your underwear. So elated were you, you'd almost forgotten about his… situation.

    Almost.

    Calming yourself, you shifted, slowly pressed your body to his - your hips firm against him - as you nodded, cheeks pink as his rock-hard length throbbed against your stomach.

    "[Y/N]?"

    "Steve, I…" You couldn't bring yourself to ask for what you'd wanted - but, God, did you want to. Lord knows you did. Your head fell to his chest with a quiet groan of frustration, but he understood all the same.

    "[Y/N], look at me."

    You lost yourself in the endless depths of his eyes, your only thought to keep breathing as he reached for your hand.

    "If you don't want to, tell me to stop."

    He watched every flicker of emotion on your face, every expression, every feeling play out in vivid detail; he brought your hand - so small in his own - to the throbbing between his legs, his eyes fluttering shut as you wrapped your fingers around him, holding him through the soft material of his sweatpants.

    "God, Steve…" You whispered, giving him an experimental squeeze, your body sweltering with heat as he moaned - it was quiet, just barely louder than an exhale, but you'd heard it all the same.

    You had done that to him, brought him to this, and you ached for more.

    "Take it off." Your tongue poked out to swipe at your lips; he swallowed at the movement, every nerve in his body alight, aflame at the feeling of your hand around him. "Please."

    He didn't need to be asked twice.

    In a single movement, Steve pulled off his pants, chucking them somewhere across the room; you gasped as you realized he wasn't wearing anything underneath, naked as the day he was born.

    You looked at him, he nodded, and your hand was on him again.

    God, Steve thought, his head pressed to your shoulder, breathing heavy as you began to stroke him, it's never been this good before. All you'd done was touch him, and he could already feel himself begin to unravel, his stomach coiling with his building release.

    You stared down between you in open-mouthed awe, feeling the weight of him in your hand; he actually keened when you'd brought your other hand to cup him, pushing his hips into your grip, chasing more of your touch - of you.

    "B-Baby…" He barely recognized his own voice from how weak he sounded, his hand shaking as he wrapped it over yours, stilling your movements. "Baby, please, I… I can't-"

    Your hands flew off of him, raised up to your chest, a pang of fear seizing your chest at the thought of having hurt him. Were you moving too fast, your grip too tight? "Steve, I-"

    "No! No, sweetheart, it's… It's not you, I swear." He pulled you close, buried his nose in your hair, his voice quiet with embarrassment as he continued, "If you keep doing that, this'll all be over way too fast."

    You giggled at him, your smile broad and beaming as he moved away to look at you, going stiff in more ways than one as you brought his hand to your chest; he could feel the thrumming of your pulse beneath the softness, keeping pace with his own.

    What, like you hadn't heard about his boobies monologue from Robin?

    You felt his fingers twitch against you, desperate to squeeze, but he held himself back, restrained himself.

    "I won't break, y'know."

    God, you were going to kill him, he swore, shaking his head, a nervous grin stretching across his lips - and it was then that he paused, his hand stilling over you as the shameful realization dawned upon him.

    He hadn't even kissed you yet.

    Where's your game, Harrington?

    He'd gone shy on you again, you noted, feeling how his breathing turned slow and deep. "Steve?" You brought your face closer to his, hands at his jaw, thumbs caressing his cheeks as you urged him to look at you. "Steve, do you-"

    "Can I kiss you?"

    Your silence stretched out for what, to him, felt like hours. Had he pushed you too far, assumed too much? Was kissing too personal for you? His first instinct was to backtrack, to make amends, and he hurriedly mumbled, "I-I mean, it's fine if you don't-"

    "Do it, Steve."

    Your words were clear, demanding in a way that made him shiver in anticipation. Slowly, carefully, he trailed his hands over the softness of your waist, pulling you flush against him, his length trapped between your thighs.

    "You want me to kiss you?" He needed to hear it from you, needed you to say it, to know you wanted this just as much as he did.

    "Please."

    Of all the times you'd imagined kissing Steve, of daydreaming about what he'd feel like, nothing could compare to the real thing; you melted against him with a sigh, arms settling around his neck as you pulled him impossibly closer, every pore on your body screaming for this moment to go on, for him to kiss you like this forever.

    And for Steve, kissing you was a miracle - he'd long since resigned himself to wanting you from afar, to watching you from the sidelines, content with the way things were. He didn't think he'd ever gather enough courage to confess his feelings to you, terrified of losing one of the closest friends he's ever had. But, now?

    Now that he's tasted you, he's insatiable.

    He was the one to deepen the kiss, to lean into you, press his body against you, throbbing between your thighs and hissing as his sensitive head caught on the fabric of your underwear. You pulled his hands back to your chest, his tongue tracing over your lip as you pulled off the lacy thing and tossed it aside.

    Your kiss had started saccharine, gentle, coy, but it had devolved into something carnal, primal, fueled on by years of pining and longing and want.

    "[Y/N], can I…? Can- touch you?" Steve panted, his words beginning to fail him, his hair already damp with sweat as it fell over his eyes. You pull one of his hands away from your chest, biting back a moan at the feeling of his calloused palm dragging over your nipple; you guided him between your legs, your breathing labored, eyes clenched shut.

    When he touched you, you screamed.

    Painstakingly, sobbingly slowly, he worked you open, his pride growing tenfold as he felt how wet you were, how slick his fingers were quickly becoming as they moved over you - and all because of him. He brushed his fingers lightly over your clit, his touch barely a touch at all, yet it drove you nearly to the brink of insanity.

    "S-Steve…!" you cried, screamed, no longer caring about the volume of your voice as you ground your hips against his hand, fingers clawing at his back. "Mmm…! Fuck, Steve…!"

    "Talk to me, sweetheart. How's it feelin'?" The closeness of his voice, of his lips pressed to your ear did absolutely nothing to veer you away from the edge of ecstasy you were barreling toward. You could feel him circle a finger around your dripping entrance, teasing you, your body writhing atop the blankets.

    "S… Steve, please…!" You shook in his arms, your face buried against his chest as you begged him for more - and when he finally pressed his finger into you, you both moaned.

    You were so hot, so tight, around his finger, sucking him in, your velvety walls pulsing against him - he could feel his cock weep as he imagined what it'd feel like to be inside of you.

    "Hmm…! A-Ah- Shit, Steve, I…!" Your head began to swim, your breathing rough as he worked you, one hand holding you by the hip while the other thrust into you, his thumb pressing down on your throbbing clit all the while.

    "Where you at, baby?" he panted, his focus breaking away from the sinful squelching coming from between your parted legs.

    "'M close, Steve… Fuck, I- I'm so close…!" You threw your head back, your body arching off the floor as Steve's kept his pace steady, looking very much satisfied with himself as you fell apart in his hands; with a final, trembling moan, you collapsed, panting for air as the sweet thrill of aftershocks shot through you; absentmindedly, you could feel him slide in behind you, holding you against his chest, hands moving idly over your sex-warmed skin.

    Still, even in the rose-colored haze of your mind, you knew you wanted more.

    "[Y/N]?" Steve watched as you turned around in his arms, pulling him into a sloppy, wet kiss. It didn't take much for him to turn to putty in your hands, and he offered no resistance as you nudged him onto his back, legs straddling his hips. "Fuck, baby, I…" he breathed, eyes wide as his gaze moved over you in reverence - bathed in the candlelight, flushed from the bliss he'd given you, he swore you never looked so beautiful.

    You moved your dripping core over his cock hesitantly - unlike Steve, you had no prior experience to draw from. Did it feel good when you pressed down on him? When you sped up? Slowed down? You stared at where your bodies connected, not realizing Steve's eyes had clenched shut, sweat beading down his brow as he tried to keep himself from losing it.

    "Sweetheart, please, I…" Steve moaned, his hands leaving you to drag through his hair. "You're killin' me-"

    "Yeah?" you panted, pushing more of your weight down onto him, your heart soaring at the litany of curses that fell from his lips - and even a few that weren't in English. "How's it feel, pretty boy?"

    At the name, you felt him jump against you, and you swore on your mother's life you'd never seen him flush so red.

    It was as though the very room had gone still, the snow outside ceasing to fall, your breath catching as you lifted yourself off of him; holding him in your hand, you lined him up with your entrance, your eyes shut as you tried to calm your nerves, but you paused at the feeling of hands running over your sides, gentle and soft against you.

    Steve looked up at you, cheeks bursting with color as he held you steady, an unspoken question clear in his eyes.

    Do you want it?

    You nodded, your lips breaking into a smile as you kissed him - and all at once, you pushed yourself down, crying out at the feeling of him stretching you, filling you.

    He was big, and you were loath to admit that the rumors you'd heard about him all throughout high school were true - he deserved to be called "King Steve".

    You fell against him, shaking at the sudden intrusion as his hands soothed over your back, your waist, your thighs, your face, guiding you down onto him, whispering praises into your ear.

    "You're doin' so well, baby. You're so good to me, taking me like that… Fuck-!"

    You were struggling to breathe, face pressed against the crook of his neck as you waited for the pain to melt away - and Steve waited with you, peppering your face in kisses, his hands smoothing over your hair.

    "Do you want to stop?" he asked, his voice softer than silk, his concern washing away the lingering traces of your discomfort. You shook your head, biting your lip as you pulled away from him, wiping at the moisture clinging to the corners of your eyes.

    Steve felt his stomach drop. "[Y/N]-"

    "I'm okay." you reassured him, your voice all but gone, eyes fluttering shut as you settled back against his hips - he'd buried himself completely into you, the feeling of you enveloping him almost too much. He waited for you, for your sign that it was alright to move - because once he started, he wasn't sure he'd be able to stop.

    You accustomed yourself to the feeling of him inside of you, thick and hard and throbbing. "S-Steve…" you moaned, your hands steadying yourself against his chest. "You can… You can move-"

    And you fell over when he snapped up into you, breaking out into fits of bright, sparkling laughter.

    "[Y/N]!" Steve couldn't help but laugh, too, feeling your walls squeezing around him. "Baby, you alright?"

    You nodded, still smiling as you threw your arms over your heated face.

    "Keep going, Steve…" you sighed, peeking at him from between your fingers - and his heart swelled, leaning over to kiss you stupid as his hips pounded into you, one of his hands moving down to your clit, rubbing you in time with his thrusts.

    He wasn't going to last - he knew he wasn't - but he'd be damned if you didn't finish before him.

    Your mouth fell open with a wanton moan, hands fisting the blankets at your sides as he gripped your hips roughly enough to bruise, his pace already beginning to falter. He kissed you everywhere he could reach, covering you in his love, his breathing coming out in grunts as he felt himself nearing his end.

    "Baby, I- I'm so fucking close-"

    "Steve, I- Ahh…! I can't…! Steve, please, I'm…!"

    And you reached your peaks together, screaming as you throbbed around him, as he painted you with his release, your bodies sticky as you collapsed onto the blankets, chests heaving for air as you floated back down from the Heavens.

    He was the first to speak. "You still with me?" Steve asked, still winded as he rolled onto his side, his hand moving up to roll a lock of your hair between his fingers - you still smelled like citrus, like sunshine and light.

    But now you smelled like him, too.

    You turned your head to look at him, eyes lidded, your grin blissfully lopsided as you kissed him - gently, sweetly, relishing the feeling of his chapped lips, of the warmth of his breath over your face. "I'm still with you, Steve."

    "Yeah?"

    "Always."

    He pulled you into his arms, his face pressed to your neck; you nudged yourself against him, exhaustion settling over you both like the falling snow.

    Before you'd drifted away, you heard his voice, quiet and meek as he whispered, "I love you."

    Your hands moved over his chest, and you kissed him one final time before falling into oblivion, your sigh of, "I love you, too." barely slipping past your parted lips, Steve chasing after you.

#becca.fic #steve harrington #steve harrington fic #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve x fem!reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington x reader #steve x reader #stranger things smut #if any of you read my encanto fic you would know how disastrous my last attempt at writing smut was so i figured practice makes perfect #and i swear i'm still writing Ride the Lightning i just needed to get this off my chest #feedback appreciated <3 #also just imagine if you will robin and the gang arriving the next afternoon all aware of what likely went down #and when they find you two AWFULLY close they all know their little plan succeeded #the group has been trying to get the two of you together for years and figured this would be the best chance

[megafreeman]

SAINTS ROW

#saints row #saints row reboot #OC: Jonathan #my edit #hey besties I'm trying a new way of making gifsets #feedback appreciated <3 #sr

[tyxoxo]

RxLuSTx0_

pairing: jeno x fem!reader

genre: smut, cam couple!jeno/reader

words: 2.5k

warnings: pwp, degrading, erotic asphyxiation/breath play (choking, headlocks/chokeholds), facefucking/throat fucking, spitting, slapping, near unconsciousness, reader wears eyelash extensions (didn’t know if this needed to be mentioned but its necessary to the story trust me!!) 

a/n: horny JAIL!!

playlist: deftones - beware • she_skin - 55

“alright baby, tell ‘em what you told me earlier.” jeno’s words were sinfully sweet, filled with excitement to hear you voice your death wish to thousands of people. 

“i want you to go as hard as you can on me. don’t. hold. back…” you ended your request with a giggle, knowing the audience got a kick out of your boldness, which would only get stomped in the dirt by your boyfriend later. 

currently, the two of you were in your bedroom, only in your underwear: him on the ottoman at the end of the bed, and you sitting back on your heels in between his spread legs, both facing the camera. 

the stream had only started minutes prior. the first ten were usually spent sitting leisurely in front of the camera, drinking sips of water to hydrate for the scenes ahead. it was definitely unassuming at first, but once the comments started flooding in, any outsider would realize that this side of the internet was nothing but filth. 

you didn’t even have to look behind you to know that jeno sat there, eyeing all of the comments with a smug look of satisfaction, cock growing harder and harder by the second. even if there wasn’t a camera lens to glance at the top of the laptop, you would still be able to sense his anticipation. 

raddad234: can’t wait to see you destroy her pretty little mouth today _

vix3n11: what’s daddy have planned for his girl today? so happy to see you two after a long day of work - xoxo

those were just a few of the many subscribers tuning in for the night. just from the sight of your two faces alone, money started pouring in. 

01bbyGirl: just sent $50!!

prXncesS666: just sent $25!

“01bbyGirl, prXncesS666, we haven’t even gotten started yet! you’re too kind, thank you so much!!” you attached your hands to your mouth, followed by blowing a kiss to the screen.

jeno’s remained quiet, leaving you to do most of the “thank you’s” for any of the gifts or money sent, as you were more eloquent with your gratitude. truthfully, his job of looking delectable for the camera was more than good enough, and you always made an effort to mention that to him. 

he continued to caress your shoulders, slender fingertips tapping along your curved skin ever so often. 

“for those of you that just now logged in, i hope you all are having a good day/night, wherever you are. you haven’t missed anything, we’re just waiting on a few more people to join before we get started!” 

the viewers continued to rise with every blink: 

2,033

3,455

4,550

it was astonishing to say the least. every saturday, at 11pm you felt pampered. so many people—strangers who were obsessed with watching jeno manhandle you for however long he saw fit.

his stamina was never short of amazing, making you dazed, confused, cock drunk…whatever words described your undoing the best. 

“repeat it again baby…” jeno’s “strong but silent” façade was wearing thin as the stream progressed. as soon as the night of debauchery began, he would turn into a degrading machine. 

just as you set your bottle of water down from taking another sip, you smiled for the camera, eyes fluttering at the upcoming repeat of your death wish.

you looked back at jeno, who’s eyes had already transformed, pupils dilated to the size of a marble.

he smiled at your intentional doe-eyed expression, nodding his head to signal that you should and will repeat it.

“don’t take it back now.” he chuckled after, offering the right amount of lightheartedness. he nuzzled his face into your neck, rubbing his nose up and down the smoothness of your skin. he inhaled deeply, catching the scent of your pleasant perfume.

“i’m nottt. don’t worry…” you giggled, leaning into his feline embrace.

“i’m sure you guys can tell jeno’s excited. reiterating from earlier, i decided that i want him to go as hard as he can on me tonight. no holding back…”

jeno missed the comments that flashed by, as he was too absorbed in wrapping his arms around your neck, lips barely grazing across your warm cheeks.

uKKixo_9: are you sure can handle it babygirl?” 

osAkalov3r: woww, you’re such a perfect sub! ur gonna do great! i know you will!! 

the ability to read more of the comments were becoming increasingly difficult. it was evident from the fact jeno had strengthened his hold on your head and neck. 

he had only did a few chokeholds in the past, but this seemed different. 

he was hungry; starved to see you gasping for air at the very start.

the fluorescent colors of the vaporwave inspired chatroom began to melt in front of your very eyes, becoming blurry from his relentless affliction. you immediately brought your hands up to clasp onto his veiny arms, breaths getting hollow with every attempt to wiggle within his broad frame.

“you asked for this. let’s see how good you do.”

his tone had dropped an octave deeper, hitting against the vein that was now bulging from your temple. 

he had clearly done this on purpose, catching you off guard like this. you couldn’t even clear your throat, let alone speak. you attempted a shallow breath as he held you in place, saliva bubbling out past your trembling lips.  

“if you fucking pass out, i won’t get to use this throat now will i?” he spat against your ear, taking a peek at the chat. a devilish grin spread across his face, resonating through the laptop screen, completely high off of the comments plastering on the screen like bets. 

bets to see how long it would take for you to tap out.

you would go against all odds, no matter the sting, no matter the lack of oxygen. 

“you make me so fucking hard baby…mmh, all this cock is for you.” 

the ability to comprehend anything that came out of his mouth was nearly non-existent. you slammed your eyes shut, hoping to sacrifice your sight for the ability to hear, as the ringing got louder and louder.

as a result, you missed the chat,

1hEllygrrl0: i can’t help but touch myself, this is so hot

kInKstarxx77: you weren’t joking, jesus christ

you were sure your face was contorted into an unsightly expression from the pressure against your entire jaw, but the self-conscious thought didn’t matter. all that mattered was jeno’s love for seeing you struggle from his brute strength. 

just as you tried to hook your nails deeper into his arm and claw away at his taut skin, he released, arms flailing back, hitting against the arm rests of the velvet ottoman. 

you persevered through the burn surging from your trachea, making sure to keep your teary eyes glued to the screen. chest heaving, ragged breaths escaping from your glossy lips. 

now you understood the science behind being addicted to this; head spinning, ears blaring, skin tingling, heart racing. 

being on the brink of consciousness felt better than any runner’s high. more fulfilling than a wrestler on steroids. 

and you wanted more.

a single, heavy cough from deep within your chest was all that you were allowed to do. as jeno had already hooked a single arm around your neck, this time rising to his feet, and pulling you up to be face-to-face with his bulging cock. 

the viewers were no stranger to your boyfriend’s strength, especially the frequent donator’s. every now and then he would gift them with videos of him exercising at the gym, coming up close to his phone screen so people could see the sweat practically streaming down his chest and abdomen.

they all knew he could destroy you. 

the chat had an excellent view, now that jeno switched the position of the laptop so everything could be watched from the side. they all tuned in as jeno stood above you, running his fingers through his hair, before taking off his boxer briefs. you used that time to take as many deep breaths as you could, fearing that there wouldn’t be much opportunity left. 

his length stood loud and proud against his navel. his girth alone took up most of the view of his chiseled face as you panned your eyes upward.  

your star-crossed eyes still showed admiration behind the angst, waiting for his next command.

he was painfully hard, tip pink and leaking down the pulsing veins on his shaft. 

there was anything but self-control as he forced your head forward onto his groin, arousal immediately coating your eyelids, balls pressing against your closed mouth. fortunately you were still able to breathe through your nose, as you would grow accustomed to by the time this was over. 

he directed your head like a rag doll, smearing your face back and forth across his length.

“she’s gonna let me use this throat any way i want to…isn’t that right baby?”

all you could do was nod violently, not having the power to speak past his balls that were prodding at your lips.

your hands remained on your thighs, clawing at the skin to take your mind off of your own arousal, that was now leaking past your underwear. 

jeno peaked over at the laptop, smirking to himself at how pathetic you looked—being controlled like the useless slut you were always meant to be.

he found himself satisfied from that little show, knowing it was time to get down to the real art. 

with his left hand still locked onto the back of your head, he pulled you back, enough to give you whiplash from the sudden movement. 

“open up. tongue out.” 

those four words were all it took for you to obey, letting him guide his tip onto your drooling tongue. he didn’t bother starting off slow; all of the subtlety could be left to rot for all he cared.

he pushed past your lips, tip hitting your uvula in a single blink. you gagged instantly, heaving further onto his length. 

his let his head fall back, finding instant gratification in your supposed journey towards resilience.

what a sick joke, jeno thought, as he let out a sigh of relief. 

he kept you still for what felt like minutes, eventually using both of his hands to usher you closer to this bare groin.  

“be a good fuckdoll…show them you can take it.”

jeno was somewhat surprised you hadn’t tried to back away so soon, but considering the years of training that led up to this point, it had definitely paid off. 

though, he could tell when it became too much. the way you began to tap his thighs over and over, was a telltale sign that even your nose breathing didn’t offer invincibility to his wrath.

your taps had turned into slaps, somehow keeping a steady rhythm despite the world spinning around you.

he ignored you, just like you expected.

it felt too good to let you go, especially with the way your tongue spasmed along the underside of his shaft. 

you used all the strength you could muster, grasping his thighs and pushing your head back against his palms. 

mau5Queen: uh ohh, she’s in trouble now hehe!  

a coughing fit ensued as you successfully managed to release yourself. your hands remained on his toned thighs, head staring down at the floor where tiny little puddles of his essence had remained. 

he used his left hand to grip your chin, squishing your face together like putty. you held your breath as you met his eyes, brows furrowed in disappointment, lip upturned in a snarl.

the tears that stained your cheeks made a connection with his right palm, a single slap that was enough to make your head turn. 

“don’t try to run from me bitch. who said my cock could leave your mouth?” he growled, patience hanging by a thread that would soon snap into seething anger if you didn’t pull yourself together quick.

he grasped his dick once more, attempting to put himself back inside where he belonged.

you purposefully pursed your lips together with a shake of your head, preventing him entry…hoping he would slap you again.

he winded his hand up and brought it down on your cheek as you faced the laptop screen. giggling to the audience, and to your sadist boyfriend that your wish had been granted.

a scornful smile adorned his face, with only the nose-down of his figure being available to the camera, which made it all the more hotter. 

you kept your head facing the camera as he finally found himself inside, knowing he loved the sight of his dick poking through your cheek from this position. for once, he thrusted slowly, letting his cock slip out with a pop, occasionally directing his tip to rub against the corners of your mouth. 

you kept your hands locked behind your back to show obedience as he continued his playful actions like constant rewinds on a videotape. your saliva and his precum formed a delicious elixir, decorating your breasts in a lustrous shine.

“turn towards me, i wanna fuck this pretty little face…” he whispered into the cold air. you complied, opening your mouth wide. 

this was considered take 2 as he started up again. you made an effort to maintain eye contact this time, wanting to witness his looks of pleasure. 

he was unreal, managing to rough you up with so much finesse, keeping you hungry for more. 

the disgusting sounds of him fucking your throat not only filled the room, but the ears of all of your viewers. you wished to read more, but keeping your eyes locked on jeno was more rewarding. 

his mouth hung open, tongue darting out to lick along his upper lip every time you bobbed your head to match his momentum.

he reached one hand down to cup underneath your jaw and the other to rest on top of your head. this headlock was rare, only on the special occasions that he knew he would reserve all of his cum for just your mouth. 

your eyes started to burn as he used his middle finger to prop your eyelid up as high as it could go, the air from his thrusts brushing against your cornea. the most fucked out expression you could ever make, was there for all to see. wearing eyelash extensions was clearly a mistake, as you felt them detach one by one from his harsh pull on the delicate skin.

“look at you…so fucked up, just for me.” he choked up the words, feeling his orgasm approaching in the pit of his stomach. 

now you felt numb, not even realizing that your eyes had rolled back into your sockets. 

your chest had grown tight, body going slump from the spent ability to breathe in through your nose. your ears rang louder than ever before, a sign that this may be the last you would ever hear for a while. 

“i’m almost there, fuck!!” 

with one final thrust, jeno flooded your mouth with his cum, a string of groans overpowering the sounds of it bubbling inside your abused throat. spurts of milky white stirred you from the light that almost consumed you. 

“drown in my fucking cum…” 

he backed out in a flash, watching you stumble backwards onto the floor. 

your sprawled body was just out of view, leaving the chat to wonder if you really were unconscious. 

you weren’t, but lying there for a while sounded the most appealing.

prXncesS666: is she dead wtf? 

~

//tagging: @glitchfiles @jasminexox5

lmk if you want a part 2 of aftercare/subspace, cuz this was pretty hardcore sksksk.

#jeno smut #lee jeno smut #jeno x reader #jeno hard hours #jeno x you #nct dream smut #feedback is appreciated <3 #just realized i missed adding fem!reader #just fixed it :))

[leafsfromthevine]

are we about to kiss rn? (based on that one photo... you know the one)

#get so nervous posting art like hahahahahahaha what am i doing #even though art is not my medium i will keep trying. and i will keep practicing <3 #so you are all allowed to point and laugh it is permitted and welcomed and any feedback is appreciated mwah #i just had to put this into the world #anyways!!! #zukka #zukka art #zuko x sokka #zukka fanart #2024 is the year of creating with no shame right

[synthwayve]

Many Laurences! Playing around with my designs for him and trying to settle on one. Please let me know which one looks best, I’m curious 👀 Color alternates of Pg 1 below the cut because indecisiveness:

#my art #doodles #bloodborne #bloodborne fanart #laurence the first vicar #bloodborne laurence #character design #oooh what the hell does this guy look like #tbh the deep red of 3 is growing on me but I’ve always seen him as blonde-ginger so I’m unsure #a dilemma indeed #any and all feedback is appreciated! I’m also open to new ideas

[solarisfortuneia]

— 𝐢 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧.

✦ info: this is a piece for @soleillunne's event, saudade. the first half was written by @llovelessly and i picked it up from there.

✦ featuring: kamisato ayato.

✦ warnings: some angst (?), not proofread.

✦ notes: hi hello my apologies for the lateness life has been life-ing real hard </3 i've done my best, but i still think it could've been better lmao

it’s strange, you think.

you sit in the comforts of expensive silk and lustrous linen, being doused into the arms of sleep and the soft sheets bit by bit—yet your eyes are laden with everything anxiousness has to offer. with a stifled sigh, your hand moves to lift you off the bed, and your feet start its nightly spiel. wooden floorboards creak beneath your step, and you do your best to focus on the crevices of your timber footing rather than the unease that begins the prelude of many, many endless and sleepless nights.

the hands of the clock by your bedside dance between the hour of midnight and eleven thirty, with a sharp yet almost inaudible tick when each second passes by.

it’s driving deeper into your anxious spiral.

why is your lover, ayato―not home yet? oh, but he promised he’d be here some time after dinner, saying in-between a quiet laugh that by the time he greets you with a sarcastic bow the food is still warm and you’d have plenty of time to ramble on about what happened in the midst of your day—however he’s nowhere to be seen. your ears are accustomed to the sound of his grimy soles, always noticing the close sound even in a crowded room—so he couldn’t be inside the house (and the chances of him toying with you were low since he loves you like the sun).

but—of course, finally—the impeccable timing of the clicking of key and lock never fail to snap you out of your strung-out haze, a welcomed arm pulling you by the waist into a quick hug before your lover places his muddy shoes under your shared bed and asks,

“how was your day, darling?” with that familiar, august tone you know dearly. you pull him into a sweet yet short, kiss—and glance at his soiled shoes.

you note they’re less dirtier than usual, and when you check upon the doormat by the entrance, it’s smeared with less sod and ground than the night after you washed it.

“. . . it was nice.”

a smooth, somnolent voice drawls between your worry and gut; reminding you that the carpet doesn’t matter more than the hours of slow dawn with your lover—so you prompt yourself to bed and forget anything but him the next morning. . . . . . it’s strange, you draw out on the patterned cloth, leg bouncing up and down from both stress and strain.

ayato has yet to arrive at the restaurant you sat in—with your hair done the way he likes it and clothed expensively in his gifts from various other nations. you bit your bottom lip each time the rusted bell that hung atop the door jingled, only to signal someone else entering and not him.

you straightened your posture, feeling your spine protest while you shift in your seat; moving your hands to either fidget below the table on your lap or on the table, where the knitted red material creases because of your awaiting and nervous actions.

just when will he arrive and kiss you like the sun?

it was as if time had grown languid with a single flutter of your lashes, watching painfully as each shift and hail had amounted to mere seconds when even just one breath had begun to feel like it weighed an hour of misspent moments on your shoulders. the quick veers from an edginess bordered by humiliation to a forced politeness (that you try to keep as light as possible to make it more believable), become more and more habitual with the minor bow of your head at the waitress checking in on your table, asking if you’d like to order something or be served more water—to which you answer that you’re good,

you’re fine,

you’re just waiting for someone—and she asks who it is—but your vocals thin to prevent you from saying anything other than,

“oh, just someone i know.”

then she nods and goes back to the mazes of the dirty kitchen, leaving you to count how many minutes it’ll take for her to come back again and ask the same questions again.

—

and so the ticks continue to sound in your head, a clock of your mind’s own making reminding you of the passage of time far better than the sounds that chime through the restaurant. and your presence feels like a statue made of stone, weighing heavily into the fabric of your surroundings. the eyes of people who entered long after you linger on the empty seat in front of yours, pity and curiosity dancing together in their gaze. 

 it’s strange, you think. he promised to be here before eight.

you’re intimately acquainted with waiting for him, the sounds of time passing by a bosom friend, the silent agony of anticipating his presence a slowly compressive pressure on your being. but he’s never made you wait this long.

not without a message, a lick of correspondence, an apology via one of his assistants, something, anything. 

where is he? 

anticipation twirls and swirls until it turns to anxiety, a glossy spill of viscous worry atop clear thought.  

where are you, ayato?

the grandfather clock made of gilded oak chimes nine, and you rise. you cannot bear the waitressess’ pitying looks anymore. to wait alone is easy enough, but under eyes that glow with condolence?

there is lighter torture in hell.

tears prick the back of your own eyes, and you cannot tell if they’re of frustration, worry or a combination of both. nevertheless, you hold your head high. the screech of the chair as you move it back rattles your skull.

the wait makes the journey home feel as if it merely flew by, as fast as lightning, the briefest flash of white in stormy skies. yet the ticks of the clock you cannot see haunt you all the same. 

hours later, long after you reach home, the hurried footsteps beyond the door, the click of the keys in the lock and the turn of the handle alerts you to his arrival.

“kamisato ayato.” you say, without bothering to turn. “where were you?” a waver betrays your emotions, your concern, your worry.

he rushes to grasp your hands in his, rare sincerity in his eyes. the raw emotion etched across his face, a clay tablet engraved by a stylus, is uncharacteristic.  “look at me, please.” his voice breaks.

slowly, you raise your gaze to meet his own.

“darling, i—” he pauses to swallow at the sight of sadness lining the rims of your eyes. “i’m so sorry.” 

“you said you’d be there before eight.” your words sit heavily in the air, laden with emotion you can’t quite verbalize. “i waited.” like i always do, you think, bitterness sharpening the edges of your thought.

“i know.” he hangs his head, moving to look at the silken lavender sheets. “i…i fell asleep. on my desk, after a meeting.”

the admission takes you by surprise. 

you glance at the shoes by the fireplace. though the luster of shoe-polish is no longer as distinct, you cannot see any evidence of dirt or sod or sand marring the sleek blackness. he really was in the office, you think. 

he loves you like the sun. you know he does. but not all of us have the luxury of basking in it when we want to. life binds our hands and our feet together in the dark.

and just like that, your heart softens against the resolution of your mind. the bags under his eyes are heavier than you’ve last seen them. “you look tired,” you murmur.

“i’m never tired for you,” he replies.

“i was worried.” you say, holding his hand tighter. i was worried about you not sending a message. i was worried that you forgot about me. i was worried that i’m not as important to you as the things that occupied your mind. 

he pulls you closer. i’m sorry for making you feel that way, he says wordlessly, with the way he draws circles on your skin.

and at last, his lips are upon yours, desperate, wanting, rushed despite exhaustion, so unlike the thorough, careful, controlled man he is. 

 “i’m sorry,” he whispers fervently, over and over, as his hands worship your skin with reverence. 

“i’m sorry,” he whispers against your shoulder when you lay fast asleep. 

“i’m sorry,” he whispers to your hair, in hopes you hear his apologies in your dreams.

this time, he makes another promise. to never promise you time out of his schedule that he cannot give. to never make you wait longer than you should. to learn to put his burdens into the hands of those willing to help, so he can swear to devote days to you, and only you. he knows both his happiness and his love revolve around you, and they will for as long as the heart in his chest beats.

after all, he is but the earth to your sun. 

#saudade; milestone #—🖋 #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #ayato x reader #kamisato ayato x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin x you #ayato x you #kamisato ayato x you #so uh this definitely could've been better #but i tried my best #as always feedback is always appreciated <3

[liliansun]

NEVER LET ME GO | LDH

pairing | lee haechan x fem reader

synopsis | it’s pretty much a given when it comes to friends of a long time that one will fall for the other, so you’re not surprised by how long you’ve kept it to yourself. unbeknownst to you, you’re not the only one holding things back and once the truth is out there’s no going back.

genre | university au, childhood/best friends -> lovers, fluff, angst

warnings | swearing, haechan is kinda rude, mentions of sex (non-detailed, just briefly brushed over), winter calls jaemin an idiot (playfully)

featuring | nct dream, heeseung from enha, chaewon from lesserafim, winter from aespa, ryujin from itzy

wc | 6.2k

a/n | shoutout to ash for beta-reading this for me and screaming in pms as she did so 🥺❤️ @ethereal-engene

I. WHEN WE WERE YOUNG

Ever since you were a kid, you always looked forward to growing up. Even if it was just a couple years older than the age you were at, you were constantly thinking about what milestone you would accomplish in the following years. You wouldn’t say this all changed when you met Haechan at the ripe age of 9, but he definitely did hinder your outlook on growing up. Haechan was the type of kid to live in the moment, never once taking the day for granted which truly made the phrase ‘opposites attract’ led you two into an unbreakable friendship from that point on.

As you two sit on the set of swings at a park near your neighborhood, you ponder on what will happen to the two of you as you enter high school in the upcoming semester. “You’ve got your thinking face on.” His voice snaps you out of your thoughts, feeling more relaxed under his tender gaze. “What’s going on in that big brain of yours?” He adds on, playfully flicking your forehead. You wince, rubbing it with a slight pout. “I’m just thinking of what’s gonna be of you and I when we get to high school.” You never could hide from Haechan, always being an open book when it came to talking to him. When you look up from the ground, you can see his eyes soften at your worries.

“I don’t know what’s gonna happen when we get to high school, but I can promise you that I’m always gonna be by your side.” You knew he was sincere, his words putting your heart at some ease. Unexpectedly, he raises his hand and holds out his pinky, something he’s always done when he makes a promise and keeps it. Smiling, you brought your hand up and interlocked your pinky with his. “Me too hyuck.” You said softly, giving his finger a gentle squeeze.

If someone passed by and saw the two of you, they would’ve assumed you’d been in love and are on your way to a relationship. They wouldn’t entirely be wrong at first glance, because you were on your way to being completely head over heels for your best friend and no one could’ve prepared you for it. When you look back to that pivotal moment in your friendship, you’d say that was the first time you finally got a taste of what loving someone could feel like and if you’re honest, you never wanted it to change.

Not much has changed over the years between you two, you’re still pretty much still stuck to the hip and spend a lot of both down and social time together. Even now that you’re both juniors in college, the two of you have found ways around your schedules for one another. While you sit on his bed, going over some notes for an upcoming test, Haechan lets out a loud sigh while slumping his head toward you. Most people would be concerned, quick to ask what was wrong and offer any help, but you knew him all too well to know this was one of his desperate attempts to get your attention. With another loud sigh, you ignore him as you turn the page in your notebook.

“Are you really ignoring me in such times?” He asks, grabbing his shirt as if he was shocked. You smile to yourself, looking up to meet his eyes and straighten your expression. “Have you ever considered that maybe I actually enjoy silence?” Haechan scoffs, turning more toward you as he sits in the chair at his desk beside the bed. “But I’m hungry, let’s go get something to eat.” You can’t deny how incredibly cute he is when he pouts, but that’s something you’d never say out loud. “I just got here 20 minutes ago and now you’re hungry?” As he pulls your notebook from your grasp, he carefully sets it on his desktop. “What if I pay?” Rolling your eyes, you let out a singular huff as you get off his bed.

Haechan takes this as a win, jumping out of his chair with his wallet in hand. “I’m picking dinner tonight.” You tell him, slipping your shoes on. He nods, grabbing his coat and shoes. “Okay, but nothing crazy expensive, I’m using Renjun’s card.” As the two of you leave his dorm, you decide somewhere on campus would settle for the two of you. “Why are you using Renjun’s card again?” You said, watching as he shoved his hands in the front pockets of his coat. “We made a bet and he lost, but I’d feel kinda bad if I blew his bank account.” You nod, continuing to walk beside him as he greets people that pass.

You’re not bothered that almost everyone on campus knows Haechan, I mean he was pretty well liked. He got along with almost anyone due to his outgoing personality and sunshine-like essence. He was essentially a charming guy who knew his way with words and it definitely worked on the girls who spared him a glance. Now that definitely bothered you, but who were you to be jealous of pretty girls wooing over your best friend? Instances like now really reminded you that you’re just the friend that’s been by his side for so many years and that the girls who call him late at night get to experience what you could only imagine, if you were imagining it.

You had continued walking when Haechan suddenly stopped to talk to what you suppose was one of his flings. She had caught his attention by calling him over and in typical male fashion, he followed the pretty girl with the pretty face. You would’ve waited for him, but who knows how long that would’ve taken if he even would’ve made it back. You entered the dining hall alone, looking straight ahead at the selection of food they have out. “What’s a girl like you doing out alone?” A familiar voice appeared behind you, bringing a small smile to your lips. You grabbed a tray and started to get items to accompany your main dish.

“Oh you know, I’m just enjoying the silence before a hurricane comes through.” You said, watching out of your peripheral view as Jeno cracked a similar smile. “Oh yeah? Where’s he at anyway?” He said, grabbing something for himself as he followed behind you. “Talking to some girl by the lab hall.” You stated, going down to pay for your food. “Figures, I bet he was the one who opted for food too.” He says, paying behind you as you wait for him. You give him a nod, following beside him as you two walk to the table where the rest of your friends were sitting.

“Well well well, look who’s finally alone.” Jaemin announced upon your arrival. “She’s not alone if she’s with Jeno, Nana.” Winter said matter-of-factly. “Lover boy is shooting his shot outside and left this gem by herself.” Jeno sat beside you, clicking his tongue as he talked. “Yeah well, one man’s loss is another man’s treasure and I’d like to be that woman.” Ryujin said, playfully winking at you. You laugh, rolling your eyes as you’re about to dig in. Just when you bring the food to your lips, Haechan brings his hands down to your shoulders with enough force to startle you.

“Why’d you get food without me, I said I was gonna pay!” He says, whining as he looks at your plate. You turn your head, staring at his almost guilty expression. “Hyuck, you were off doing your thing so I came to get food.” He sits on the opposite side of you with a frown, picking some food he knew you only got for him off your tray. “Since some of us are here can we talk about the back to school party this weekend?” Winter announced. Jaemin whipped his head toward her slowly, squinting his eyes. “You do know it’s been a month since school started right?” His lack of ability to pick up the slight sarcastic meaning by the party title earned him a punch to the shoulder by Winter. “Yes you idiot, god why do you even talk.”

Jaemin winces as he rubs his shoulder, mouthing to you with a smile that Winter was apparently in love with him. You giggle, continuing your meal till it was nearly done. When you finally notice that Haechan took the cake you had, you frown. You could’ve easily gotten another one, but the one you had was one of the last few on display. Jeno noticed your sudden sadness and put his cake onto your tray. You flash him a smile, mentally thanking him. The rest of the table watches the exchange happen and even more so how Haechan’s expression changes while watching. As you look up confused as to why everyone was eyeing the three of you, you then turn your head to Haechan who was giving Jeno a hard stare.

Putting your hand on his shoulder, he seems to visibly soften at your touch while shifting his gaze onto you instead. “Okay, now that whatever that was is over, I’m gonna go.” Ryujin says as she gets up from the table. You give her a questioned look as she signals for you to follow her. Winter does the same, stealing your cake off your tray. “My cake!” You say, quickly walking around the table to get your dessert. “Sorry hyuck, I’m stealing your girl!” She says as she and Ryujin giggle while leaving the dining hall. You have to jog to catch up to them, finally getting the cake from Winter. “So are we gonna just ignore that or what?”

“Ignore what?” Ryujin scoffs as Winter looks at you in shock. “C’mon y/n, you can’t tell me that boy isn’t head over heels for you.” You don’t comment, staring down at your cake while following along the girls. “Jeno was just being sweet, don’t read too much into it.” “No girl, not Jeno, Haechan!” Winter says, smiling at you widely. “Even I saw those heart eyes throwing fireballs at Jeno when he gave you his food, man was saying ‘don’t touch my girl’.” You shrug, trying to shake off the sickly sweet feeling you have in your stomach. As much as you’d want Haechan to reciprocate your feelings, you don’t ever see it happening.

“He’s not like that, we’re just friends.” Judging by the way the two of them look at you, you know they don’t buy it. If you’re honest, you don’t either, but purely from a one-sided point of view. Only in your dreams will you ever be more to Haechan and throughout the years you’ve learned to accept that. “Whatever you say girl.” Winter says, interlocking her arm with yours. “Speaking of, when was the last time Haechan ever got jealous, do you know?” Ryujin asks, slinging one arm around your shoulder. You smile to yourself at the thought of the memory in mind. “When we were young.”

II. HEADACHE

The next time you saw Haechan was days later when he showed up at your dorm unannounced. You were sitting in bed, headphones in with your calming playlist on mid volume in attempts to soothe your headache. You took some pain medicine to help aid your throbbing head, but nothing seemed to relieve the misery. Your roommate Chaewon decided to go out to study so that you could lay in the dark till you were feeling better. As she opened the door with all her books and bag in hand, Haechan was the last person she expected to see behind it. “Oh, uh did y/n call you over?”

“No, I came to surprise her.” He said, holding up a bag with some of your favorite snacks. He sensed you weren’t in a good mood through the way you were responding to his texts earlier and he did what he thought would cheer you up and bought you food and a drink. “Take care of her, yeah? Her head is hurting badly.” She said as she walked past him while he entered. He saw you laying in bed with the blanket up to your cheeks, the curtains covering the windows beside your bed. Quietly, he takes his shoes off and sets the bag down by your bed. You had yet to notice his presence while he started taking the snacks out and laying them on your bedside table.

When you turned over, you weren’t entirely surprised to see him beside you. You paused the music, taking a headphone out to hear him humming along to the music that was playing. “What are you doing here hyuck?” You asked as you moved over in your bed to make room for him. He pushed the cover back gently, climbing into your bed and taking the headphone you had offered up. “I noticed you were off in text today so I brought you some stuff to see you smile.” You were truly down so bad, the simplest yet sweetest gesture had you flushed in the cheeks and you couldn’t help it. To hide how hot your face got, you pushed your head against his chest once he got comfortable.

“Just a headache is all.” You mumbled, listening to his heart beat inside his chest. You felt your mind start to relax under his touch, the feeling of him rubbing the back of your hair had you hyper aware of his gentleness. A comfortable silence continued on between the two of you, just the sound of music and soft breathing filled the room. “Are you planning to go to that party Winter mentioned?” You suddenly ask, feeling his chest rise a little more at your question. “Dunno, you going?” You nod, blinking at the fading light peeking through the window by your roommate’s bed. “Maybe I’ll go just to protect you from any wandering eyes.”

You sat up, smiling down at Haechan. “Wandering eyes? What are you now, my father?” You said, laughing a little as he sat up. “I’m serious y/n! Some guys are out to get pretty girls like you who just so happen to be all alone.” You said that so confidently that you couldn’t help, but to laugh. “Why are you laughing, huh?” With one brow raised, he eyed you as you started to calm down. “Nothing, you’re just too funny.” Haechan sat up quickly, switching the way you two were positioned in your bed. He was now hovering above you, hands immediately finding their way to your most ticklish spots. “Oh so I’m funny now huh? Do you find this funny?”

You couldn’t stop laughing as you tried to fight off his devilish hands. After what seemed like nearly 10 minutes of being tickled nonstop, Haechan moved his hands away from your sides to let you catch your breath. Unbeknownst to you, he was watching the way your eyes crinkle when you smiled. Bringing one hand up to your cheek, he pulls a piece of your hair away from your face. You suddenly went stiff, watching his eyes shift from yours down to what you could only imagine was your lips. Your breath seemed to be caught in your throat as you noticed how he didn’t look up nor did he move.

You didn’t know what to do, whether to move in and close the space between you or to make your way from underneath him and pretend this didn’t happen. Your heart was saying one thing, but your mind opted for another. You cleared your throat, bringing Haechan to his senses as he got off from above you and stood beside the bed. His cheeks were a light shade of pink as he rubbed the back of his neck. “So yeah, uh as I said earlier.” He said, shifting his eyes around the room to ease the awkward tension. “The snacks, yeah..the snacks.” He could feel your gaze on him, but he couldn’t bring himself to meet it.

A couple minutes pass while silence fills them before either of you speak up. You’re about to try and change the subject when you hear his phone go off. Normally when he was with you, he’d only have select contacts on for notification so you assumed it must’ve been his roommate. Glancing at the caller ID when he pulls it out, you knew whoever it was that she must’ve been important. Something about his expression makes your heart sink into the pit of your stomach. He almost smirks at his phone before realizing where he’s at and what had just happened.

“I think I’m gonna go.” He said, shoving his phone back into his pocket. Silently, you nod without meeting his eyes. You could practically feel the tears starting to sting as they welp up, opting to not cry in front of Haechan over something you consider dumb. He can sense the change in atmosphere, your posture and sudden energy makes his heart break, but he’s too scared to comfort you after what happened just moments ago. “I’ll see you at the party y/n.” He said as he left while you looked over at the way he laid your snacks. Part of you wonders if he knows what he’s doing to your heart and part of you thinks it’s just how he is and that maybe you’re not as special as you hope you are to him. Either way, he has your heart in his hands and it’s too delicate now compared to your reappearing headache.

III. FAIRY GODMOTHER

“So you’re telling me that he was about to suck your face off, but for a message from his booty call and left?” You stare at your roommate, quite shocked at the way she worded everything from what you all told her. “Yeah, pretty much I guess.” You replied, throwing your head back onto the bed with a groan. You could hear her laughing, lifting your head to see her hysterically laughing into her hand. “I don’t see what’s so funny.” You continue, trying to hold back from joining her. As she calms herself down, she straightens up while wiping away her tears. “I knew transferring to SMU was gonna be different than HYBE-U, but y’all are a different breed on this campus.” She says, getting up from her chair that she pulled beside your bed and made her way toward your closet.

“What exactly are clothes gonna do to salvage what dignity I have left?” You asked, getting off your bed to meet her in your closet. She rummages through your clothes in the back, a section of clothes you never really wore unless you wanted to feel extra pretty. “We’re gonna make him jealous at the party tonight.” She said as if that was the most common sensible thing. You stare at her worriedly, especially with the outfit she had chosen. “C’mon y/n, haven’t you ever read those fanfics where the girl gets the guy jealous which lures him into confessing his underlying love for her and they live happily ever after?”

“This isn’t a fanfic nor is it a fairytale chae.” You said, watching as she turns to you with a bright smile. “C’mon, I know a couple of people who can ease your mind.” Hesitantly, you followed her across campus to one of the halls you had only been in once. You were starting to get a nagging feeling of where she was taking you, but you tried to relax and follow along with her. You entered the same dorm hall you knew that Chenle and Jisung stayed in, walking past their door with a small smile on your face. As she continued down the hall, she stopped at one door that you knew was most likely a single room.

After a few knocks and the loud music from inside the room stopping, a very tall and yet handsome guy opened the door. “Oh, hey Chaewon.” He said, instantly smiling down at her. “Heeseung, this is my friend y/n who also doubles as a roommate and we kinda need your help.” She says, walking past him to enter his room. Unfazed, he steps aside and gestures for you to enter the room as well. Upon entering, you recognize almost immediately that he was a music major. He had music sheets laid across his desktop, an acoustic guitar on his bed and the stereo where you could only assume that the music was coming from was on his bedside table.

“Heeseung also transferred from HYBE-U, mister smarty pants graduated early so even though he looks older, he’s a year behind.” She said, taking his chair as her seat from his desk. He smiles at you, shrugging as he walks over to sit on his bed. “I just got lucky is all, don’t listen to the fairy tales she tells.” You nod, leaning against the wall while still observing his room. “So she is a fairy godmother after all?” This made Chaewon laugh, nodding in agreement. “So what’s up, did you need something or do you just enjoy my company?” Heeseung asked as he leaned against his pillows. “My dear y/n here has a case of the lovesick for her best friend who just so happens to be a fuckboy.” You groan, dropping your face into your hands while Heeseung surprisingly listens without comment. “So I need you to come to the party with us tonight that he’ll be at to kinda spice things up.”

You could hear some shuffling, but nothing was said by either of them. Just as you’re about to look up, Heeseung grabs your wrists and pulls them from your face. “Are you okay with this y/n? I know we just met, but I don’t want to tag along if you’re not down.” You had to truly think about your answer for this because this could make a lot of both good and bad things happen between you and Haechan. Part of you was too scared and slightly insecure to try and get his attention on you, but you also felt like you waited so long for this and if not now, then when. You finally nod, giving both Heeseung and Chaewon the green to get ready and go. After you and Chaewon had finished getting dressed, the two of you met Heeseung down by his car for a ride.

Winter and Ryujin were texting you nonstop on the way asking why you didn’t ride with them and once they were filled in, they completely understood. You were typing away on your phone to your friends, not noticing Heeseung smiling softly at you. “How long have you two known each other?” You look up at him confused until you follow his eyes to your lock screen. It was a picture you and Haechan took over the summer when you visited your hometown, the sun kissed his skin beautifully while you hid from it with glasses and a hat. “Over 10 years.” You answer, looking up to meet his eyes for a second. “I hope this goes well for you.” Your heart melted at his words, reaching over to give his shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Me too because if I’m honest, I’m tired or watching you two shoot love arrows with your eyes.” Chaewon said as she got out of his car.

Both you and Heeseung got out of the car, making your way into the NCT Fraternity house. Heeseung was always one step behind you, playing into the whole idea that he was your plus one for the night. You could see some familiar faces throughout the crowd, looking around to see if you could spot one of your friends lingering around. “You two have fun, I’m gonna go find a drink.” Chaewon said, barely audible over the music before she slipped off into the crowd. “You’re not weird are you?” Your question makes Heeseung laugh, shaking his head as you seem pleased with his answer. You grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the side of the house where the kitchen and typically a pool table was at.

Just as you turn a corner, you spot Renjun and Winter talking over by the kitchen entrance. “I found some of my friends.” You said, getting a nod from Heeseung as you made your way through the crowd. “There she is!” Winter said a little louder than you expected. She throws her arms over your shoulders, pulling you into a hug. You smile, returning the hug as she laughs into your hair. “Do I know you?” Renjun asks, immediately eyeing Heeseung down. “He’s my plus one, Jun this is Heeseung, Heeseung this is Renjun.” You say, prying Winter’s arms from around you.

You fidget under Renjun’s questioning gaze, knowing he has more questions that you’d rather not answer. He senses your shift in demeanor, rolling his shoulders back in attempts to relax. “Did you already meet up with Haechan?” He says to which you answer him no. “Last time I saw him, he was somewhere out near the rooms.” You nod, bidding goodbye as you decide to take the way through the kitchen to avoid less people. “People have been eyeing us since we walked in, just a heads up.” Heeseung says as he leaned down near your ear. You start to turn to face him as someone behind you nearly knocks you over.

You shut your eyes, waiting for the impact of the floor to hit until you realize someone is holding you up, or rather someone. You can smell Haechan’s cologne behind you, making your lips instantly curl up into a smile. Just as you’re about to say something, you follow his hard gaze to Heeseung who was holding onto your wrist and hip. “Are you okay y/n?” Heeseung’s voice snaps you out of the fog that the situation puts your head in. You nod, standing up with a little more effort as Haechan’s eyes move between the two of you. “Why are you still touching her?” Haechan’s tone was something you’ve never heard before. He genuinely looked like a million things were going through his head and one of them was about to be directed to the boy beside you.

“I was helping her up, who are you again?” Heeseung asked, feeling slightly intimidated and confused as to why the boy in front of you looked like he was going to go to war for you. “I’m her best friend, Haechan, you are who again?” You put one hand on his chest, feeling how tense he was as he took deep and shaky breaths. “Heeseung, her date for the night.” When you felt his warm hand on your shoulder, you didn’t know whether to push him away or accept the warmth. “Do you mind if I steal your date then?” Heeseung looked at you, asking through his eyes if you were okay. When you gave him a nod, he slowly backed away and eventually made his way through the crowd.

Haechan grabbed your hand as soon as Heeseung was out of sight, bringing you along the back of the house and into the back yard. You immediately start to rub your arms due to the slight breeze blowing your way. “Wanna explain who the fuck that was or do I need to guess?” You were genuinely shocked by his sudden hostility, crossing your arms over your chest. “Excuse you? What’s your deal hyuck, he’s just a friend that came with me to the party.” Haechan laughed, a little too unsettling for you to digest before he looked back at you. “Oh so he’s a friend huh? Is that what you do with all your friends now, nearly kiss them in your fucking bed before moving on to the next?”

You felt so many emotions that took the blow from his words. You could feel your eyes start to sting as you drop your arms. “You’ve been fucking some girl or many to be exact so why the hell does it matter when one guy caught my attention, huh?” This seemed to set Haechan off more than you’ve ever seen. His cheeks were a slight shade of pink from both his anger and the bite of winter winds. “You’re in love with me y/n, we all see it and yet you go fucking around with other guys so you might as well not feelings for me!” You couldn’t tell if the city around you went silent or were his words just that loud, but you could hear your heart shatter inside your chest.

Haechan didn’t seem to register his words until he looked up at your broken expression. The tears that were now flowing freely down your cheeks stained your skin as you let go of your clenched fists. “So you knew..and you didn’t say anything?” You couldn’t bear to look him in the eye, feeling almost embarrassed at how easily you had been strung along. “Y/n, I didn’t mean it like-“ “You knew how I felt about you and instead of rejecting me you played around with girls in front of me?” You didn’t notice how close he was getting to you till he was within arms reach, so you stepped back. “Please let me explain, I’ll-“ You couldn’t be here any longer, you didn’t want to see him nor did you want anyone to see you like this.

“Fuck you donghyuck.”

IV. WHEN YOU’RE GONE

You inevitably spent weeks dodging Haechan at all costs. Since the night at the party where you two had a major falling out, you’ve spent your days in class and headed right back to your dorm if the coast was clear. If it wasn’t your roommate, it was one of your friends who kept an eye out for Haechan lingering around your door. From what they were trying to tell you, he sounded pretty desperate to see you, but you just weren’t ready yet. You stayed huddled up away from your usual spots where you know he could find you and slip away whenever you could.

Your pillow had become your best friend when you couldn’t stop yourself from crying each time your mind wandered back to that night. Chaewon did her best to comfort you and even laid with you on some nights till you fell asleep, but nothing she did could fill the void in your heart that had been caused by Lee Haechan himself. You were so hurt, so many questions that you had for him and you’d be damned if he didn’t answer them. More than that, you were confused as to why he did what he did with the information he had. He could’ve told you he wasn’t interested, he could’ve causally kept you in the friend zone instead of giving you the slightest bit of hope.

You were starting to get a headache as you sat on your bed, scrolling through videos on your phone. When the caller ID came down, you saw that Heeseung was calling you so you picked up. “I’m glad to see you’re still alive”. He says, laughing a little to lighten the mood. You let out a soft sigh, fiddling with the blanket between your fingers. “If that’s what this is called then consider me living like Larry.” When the line went silent, you could practically feel the disappointment through the phone. “Didn’t like that one?” You said, laughing as Heeseung let out a heavy sigh. “That was so bad, so so bad y/n.”

“Hyuck would’ve gotten it.” You mumbled, hoping he didn’t hear you as the tears you thought would have dried up start to reappear. “He misses you.” All of a sudden, you couldn’t think. The thought of him missing you wasn’t hard to imagine, but it made your heart ache so much more when you let yourself feel bad for creating such distance between you two. “He comes to I guess his friend’s room just down from mine and from what I’ve seen, he looks rough.” The two of you went silent once again, only untold thoughts filling in the gaps of the conversation. Heeseung takes a deep breath, about to say something when you hear a knock at your door.

“Coming!” You yell out, getting out of bed while wiping your face with your sleeve. “Are you expecting someone?” Heeseung asks through the phone, strumming on his guitar. “I ordered takeout earlier.” He only hums, bidding farewell as you throw your phone onto the bed and go to open the door. As you open the door, you don't know how exactly to react when you see Haechan standing in front of you holding what you assume is your takeout. “I paid him extra to let me be the one to deliver it, he kinda looked at me like I was insane, but he got a good tip.” He said, trying to get any form of a smile out of you.

You stare at him, nodding slowly as you take in his appearance. He looked a little thinner, the bags under his eyes slightly darker and his hair not as shiny as you remember it. Instinctively, you want to reach out and touch his cheek, but you hold back and try to figure out what to say from here. “Can I come in?” He says, fidgeting with the plastic bags in his hand. You can’t pinpoint what washed over you for you to step aside and let him in, but you’d have to face him eventually so opting for it now isn’t that bad of an idea. He looks around the room as if he’s never been inside, trying to find little things that he might’ve missed. To him, nothing changed. Your pictures of your friends are still up on the wall, your desktop is still oddly as neat as ever and the picture you two took on his family vacation is still in its frame next to your bed.

“What are you doing here?” The lump in your throat was keeping you from speaking any louder than a not so soft whisper. When he finally turned back to you, he could see how his much presence had affected you. “I needed to talk to you, I can’t keep going on like this without seeing you y/n.” You didn’t wanna be a fool, hesitant to accept the truth lying behind his words. Instead, you cross your arms and press for more out of him. “So then talk, but if you’re gonna waste my time then you might as well go now.” He sets the bag on your desktop, running his free hand through his hair as he gathers his thoughts.

With a deep, shaky breath, he meets your eyes and in that moment he felt like the world around him was falling apart. “I want to start off by saying how sorry I am for being the biggest asshole in the world. I never meant to hurt you or make you feel like I was stringing you along because I couldn’t get it shit together and figure out my feelings for you.” You try to keep it together, wiping away the tears that threaten to fall down your cheeks as he continues. “I love you y/n, you’re my best friend in this entire world and I can’t- I can’t stand not being next to you anymore.” His voice sounded strained, as if he couldn’t get the words out.

“I was scared to admit that I had the same feelings you had for me and I know that sounds like a fucked up excuse, but I mean it when I say I love you. Jealousy took over the worst part of me and when I saw you with any guy, I felt like you’d fall for them and leave me.” You could tell he was crying, his hands were constantly wiping away his tears and brushing them on his cheeks. Your heart was broken, you never imagined that you’d be having this conversation with Haechan, let alone watching him cry and be so emotional with you. He walked toward you, trying to control his emotions while taking your hands into his.

“I don’t wanna know what it’s like when you’re not here, when you’re gone it’s like I’ve lost a part of me I’ll never get back and I know I don’t deserve any of it, but if you can forgive me, I promise I’ll make it up to you.” You were a little taken aback by his sudden confession and the overall moment. You wanted to believe him and take him into your arms as if nothing had happened, but you were still very much hurt and cautious for your fragile heart. When he felt your arms wrap around him, he blinks away the tears. “Promise me that you’ll never do some dumb shit like that again and maybe we’ll talk about this being more.”

Hearing his soft laugh made your heart swell. You couldn’t tell if you had done something right in your past life or if you were just this lucky to have him with you, but you were hoping nothing would change. “I promise as long as you promise to never let me go.” You lift your head, bringing one hand to his cheek. “I promise, you better be lucky I love you.” He smiles, leaning into your touch while closing in on the space between you two. “I am extremely lucky to be loved by you and to only love you.”

©️liliansun., 2022

#anddd that’s it! #I hope you guys enjoy reading this <3 #feedback is appreciated 🫶 #haechan fluff #haechan angst #haechan oneshot #haechan au #donghyuck angst #donghyuck au #donghyuck fluff #donghyuck oneshot #nct dream au #nct dream fanfiction #nct dream fluff #nct dream angst #nct dream haechan #nct 127 haechan #nct dream donghyuck #haechan fanfic #donghyuck fanfic #university au #university ff #childhood friends to lovers #©️ liliansun

[blackjackkent]

Giffing BG3, part 2/?

Meeting Us

#my gifs #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 gifs #baldur's gate 3 gifs #bg3 us #gif feedback appreciated as always c: #also making this at midnight again but scheduling it for a more sane hour this time XD #giffing BG3

[samandmaxsecretsanta]

Secret Santa complete! Thank you to all who participated, hope to see y'all soon, but for now! That's all folks :D

#my true agenda was getting 16 pieces of sam and max content to look and read this whole time i hope u know #a nefarious scheme #sam and max #this post kinda late but work has been hell this last week lmao #pls send any feedback/criticisms! #might do this again but we'll see #love u guys and so so appreciate everyone who particpated fr it was so fun <3 #my art #EDIT: I FORGOT MAX'S TAIL #a tragedy :'( #its just behind him ok leave me alone #edit again: i just changed history shhh abt it

[bl-inkstone]

changed my tune so fast just bc of youtube autoplay lmao ok here have some sagau diluc thoughts

the player, diluc thinks, is an incredibly endearing being.

he's come a long way from the curt and wary attitude he used to put on around the traveler (and by extension, you), and today is one of those days where he finds himself privately thanking whatever powers there may be that allowed your paths to cross, with him staring at the reflection of you hidden deep within the traveler's eyes in the wake of his fight with the abyss that fateful night in mondstadt.

as one of the first people to have their constellations manifest in the sky of teyvat, diluc is more than aware that the fact that you still choose to ask for his company in your (or, well, the traveler's) journey is a gift he must treasure deeply. he knows that it is your presence in this world that gives vision bearers a chance to become something greater than they presently are. he also knows that he is no longer as impressive of a companion in battle as he used to be from back when the sky wasn't as bright as it is now (when the world you knew was smaller and he was still a figure that you could look to and proudly call "your main").

but you always come back to him. when he least expects it, you invite him back to your party and diluc can't help but privately think, privately wish, that it's because you're as fond of him as he is of you.

standing in silent prayer while you bestow upon him artifacts that thrum with divine power is an experience he can never tire of. the claymores you give him, the food he eats, all the materials he needs to reach a breakthrough in his capabilities... he understands that you aren't teyvat's creator, but this world and everything in it seems to exist just for you. you, the provider, the sustainer, the beloved of all. sometimes, diluc feels that everything he has and ever worked for have all been for the sake of one day meeting you.

he's not a religious man by principle, and he loathes people of absolute power. the only exception to this, however, is you. he's not foolish enough to believe you're some omnipotent, omniscient being that lords above all. no, you're not like that. he knows this because the longer he journeys with the traveler and feels their bond strengthen, the faint whispers he used to strain himself to hear grow clearer and clearer until finally, one day, he hears you.

you're both nothing and everything he thought you'd be. you view the world of teyvat with so much awe and joy that it's infectious, and he finds himself smiling more often than not to the privilege of finally hearing you. the traveler always looks at him with an understanding smile when diluc slows down in their travels to listen to you. he lives for the moments when you talk to yourself or to someone else (a companion of your own, maybe? from your place beyond the stars?) because this is how he learns. your favorite food, your favorite nations, your favorite "characters" and more. he holds every morsel of information you unknowingly give close to his chest where all his affections and wishes hide. he likes to think that this way, he can be closer and better for you.

but he knows he's not the only one who hears you, and it is the traveler that is closest to you out of all them. even so, diluc harbors no ill will to the avatar you chose to see and travel the world through. you're so fond of the traveler, and how could he ever come to loathe anything graced by your love?

he knows how to play nice. it helps that most of your other chosen are people he can find himself enjoying the company of as well. diluc understands that as much as he wants to be the sole holder of your attention, the world does not function that way. he's willing to extend an olive branch so long as they can all work together to keep you present in teyvat. he can worry about his more aggressive competition later when they aren't at risk of being caught in such an unsightly state by you — all that matters to him, right now, is how to keep your gaze on him for just a little longer and keep you from leaving him again.

it's a daunting thing to be so close to your grace. you take diluc to lands he'd never thought he'd visit again, to ruins of civilizations long past, domains with unimaginable horrors and have him run, claymore and vision burning at his hip, into fight after fight at your command. it's tiring at best and painful at worst, but you always take care to heal him and his companions before leaving, and you always lead them somewhere safe to rest until teyvat brightens and you come again.

his current companions (his "supports", he inwardly preens) rest and talk amongst themselves once they feel your presence leave. it used to be something they, your chosen, would panic over, but now that they've gotten more used to you and all the signs that pointed that yes, this is your will, they've grown to be able to tolerate the harrowing chill that comes when your warmth leaves them. diluc leans back on his chair in front of good hunter to observe them. they're all people he's come to grow fond of in time: diona was prickly, yes, but ha become pleasant to be around once they grew past their misunderstandings. the young master of the feiyun commerce guild, xingqiu, was also a reliable companion both in and outside of battle, and for all his faults, venti has proven himself to be a devout believer, unwilling to be a burden to you or the party you've guided him towards.

under normal circumstances, he never would've met and forged such strong bonds with these people. if not for your own interference, he never would've bothered getting to know any of them at all. though he may have his own gripes and complaints at times of how their dynamic works when you're not around, diluc is still fond of them. he's grateful for the opportunity to grow close to people again, and traveling the world alongside them and the traveler has become one of the few things he's begun to look forward to outside of his duties as "diluc, master of dawn winery." when the day is done and he can sit and relax with them in the tables in front of good hunter, he can rest in the company of others who understand the near-maddening pull in his chest that draws him to try and get closer, closer, to you.

it's days like these where diluc quietly thanks whatever it is brought you to them, and prays that one day, he will no longer have to search through the traveler's eyes to see you.

#miyo.muses #diluc.togo #i wrote this all in one sitting please i love him so much #i hope my research did you justice sir #if he sounds awkward or anything id appreciate feedback on how to improve! #diluc is one of my faves honestly and i wanna write more for him #and as you can see #he is a very generous muse #this is worse than when i wrote for zhongli oml #i wanted to keep this short n sweet #just a silly little hcs or brainrot post #but no #this happened #but im not that mad lmao diluc gets a free pass <3 #also pls dont flame the team ok i asked a friend what their diluc team looks like and they said “diona + xing + venti” #dsdhewu i have a very skewed view on what's considered a long or short post but just to play it safe #i added the read more this time bc id hate to be the person who clogs up the tags with super long posts #ok thats it rambling over i hope u guys enjoy <3 #genshin impact #sagau #self aware genshin #genshin diluc #diluc x reader

[aster-bluejay404]

“We could’ve been… u s.”

HI! I came back after being semi-inactive for practically 4 years sobshwhwhhw. This is the portrait of the Crowley cosplay I put together for my photography practical exam during November of last year and have been my pfp for a good while now 👀 I had so mcuh fun making this cosplay, and I have an Aziraphale one that will be coming soon 🥹🥹🥹 Will be cosplaying with one of my best friends as well 👀

Me and my good friend Mars had a sleepover together during the last week of October and binged the entirety of Good Omenns! The ending absolutely decimated us 😭😭😭 The fandom is also quite homey and fun— and has similar vibes as the moomin fandom 👀 WHICH IS FUNNY BC HHHH— THERE ARE TOO MANY PARALLELS WITH THE FANDOMS AND ITS TWO MAIN SHIPS AUGHHHH (the lines are blurring help me aaagh) /lh /pos

Anyways, I’ll be linking the full analysis of Crowley’s character that I made alongside this portrait~! I hope you enjoy it! 🥰🥹🫶

No Nightingales: A Crowley Inspired Photojournal

#SOBS IM WRITING & POSTING THIS AT 3 AM SORRY IF THE ENGLISH MAY BE A BIT WONKY #FEEDBACK WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED AAAA! #THEY🥺🥺🥺 #ghh these two ineffable idiots occupy a space in my brain rent free- #alongside hemulector and snufmin i sob #Good Omens #good omens crowley #anthony j crowley #Crowley #crowley cosplay #fem crowley #good omens season two #good omens season 2 #good omens: the nice and accurate prophecies of agnes nutter

[illarian-rambling]

Writing question for any adhd-ers who take some sort of medication for it: how does it feel to be off your meds? I have a character who had to leave behind all her belongings, and one of those belongings happened to be her fantasy Adderall. Google has given me no straight answers :(

#any feedback is appreciated <3 #writing #writerscommunity #writblr

[tsumus-babydoll]

FAMILY TRIP - ATSUMU MIYA

wc: 1.3k  l fluff ᓚᘏᗢ l gn!reader

tw: reader and atsumu have a child, lots of fluff

a/n: this is my first ever writing on tumblr. i hope it’s alright, if i missed anything please let me know. i would kindly appreciate any kind of feedback! thank you for reading!

sighing you take your hat off of your face. being on vacation with your husband and your chubby little toddler, of course meant, that your husband decided to visit the beach before it’s time to leave.

atsumu loving the beach was nothing new to you, so you were fine with it. even though you hate getting sand stuck everywhere, let alone the amount of people, and having to bear the sun all day long. for him you’d suck it up though, knowing he loves a good opportunity to play beach volleyball while his family is watching, and getting a tan to drive every single fan – aiming at you though - even crazier, (you could see the edits coming, please, you weren’t complaining though). so here you are; laying on a big blanket with an umbrella protecting you and your little family from the sun.

you looked to your right where you saw the great grand miya atsumu laying on his stomach with his hands tucked under his head fast asleep. cute – you thought to yourself, not that you would ever mention it in front of him. on his back laid your one-and-a-half-year-old son, kaito, sprawled out into a starfish position, resembling just his father.

it was about time to leave, the radiant sun setting in with its yellow pinkish lights, but before you just needed to admire the sight in front of you for a few more minutes. a few minutes more wouldn’t hurt anybody, right?

gazing at the father son duo you couldn’t help but coo at them both drooling, one more than the other. you decided to take a few pictures of them. seeing your son with his baby hat, a piece of fabric over his back and his favorite little giraffe doll held onto with a strong grip in his tiny soft hand, made something inside of your heart bloom, you couldn’t be any happier. while you were in awe of your little troublemaker unknown to you your husband was awake watching as your focus was on them.

the sound of giggles fills the air. looking down you are met with the most beautiful pair of eyes you had ever seen, the kind to make your stomach fill with butterflies. “mornin’ baby,” speaking with his groggy voice, you could see, that he’s looking at you like you are the source of beauty.

“mornin’ tsum’, did ya have a good nap?”. a hum and a slight nod are all you get before you let him rest his head in your hand. while closing his eyes you tell him “we should get going, ya know. It’s gonna get dark and you need to drive carefully, sumu”. he opened his eyes “I know, I know. can’t we just enjoy the last few minutes watching the sunset, angel?” he pouts. knowing you cannot resist atsumu you turn, sitting up so you can look at the ocean reflecting all those pretty colors of the sunset.

you feel big arms engulfing you from behind, he rests his head on yours. looking to your side, you realized your lover boy somehow managed to put your still sleeping kaito into his baby seat.

you let yourself relax in his touch, as strokes your arm. feeling his chest with your back, rising and falling, you sink into the of comfort he is providing. both of you sit there, swaying side to side, enjoying the birds chirping in the silence of your toddler’s nap.

“I love you,” he says it like it’s an obvious statement. not like he’s confessing, but like it’s a fact. turning your head, you kiss his bicep acknowledging the love and care he holds for you “I love you too, sum’”. smiling to himself he takes your hand, kisses it and goes ahead to ask you, “why the hell are ya so gorgeous?”

laughing you spin and cradle his lap. he’s grinning at the sound of it, because for him it’s the most beautiful thing in the entire universe.

you gently hold his face like it’s the most precious thing in your palms and realize how warm his skin feels compared to yours. “what?”, he asks looking like the innocence that’s lacking in his personality (smh). “nothin’.”, you say, though the dorky grin on your face tells otherwise. losing yourself in his chocolate brown eyes you murmur, “so pretty.” he flusters, of course he does. no matter how much of an act atsumu puts on to impress you or how tough he acts around you, you simply know he will always be your dear husband, whose age shrinks to teenage boy atsumu, when you’re flirting with him.

he takes your face into his hands and looks down before looking up again. he slowly approaches your soft velvety lips, and you seal the kiss. it’s messy, but surely full of love. you heavily breath out of your nose, grasping onto him while moving your lips to the rhythm he has set. breaking apart you lean onto each other’s foreheads, trying to steady your breathings.

hearing him let out a breath before smiling he asks “let’s get going shall we, baby?”.

before you know it, kaito is awake. groaning you stand up and take kaito into your arms, “hi baby, did ya’ have a good nap? yeah? are ya’ hungry? c’mon let’s getcha something ta eat, huh?”your husband watches you and laughs wholeheartedly. he would’ve never imagined seeing you this swoon over your little family. he grabs the baby bag with the backpack, to pack the blanket in it, after shaking the sand off.

after finishing doing so, he picks up the baby seat and walks towards you, where he sees the love of his life showing his son the birds. he gives your shoulder a peck, “let’s get into the car, hmm?”. you follow him to the parking lot.

once you arrive at your car, he opens the door for you and kaito. putting your toddler into his seat and handing him his play doll you go to sit into the passenger seat. watching atsumu get in as you are ready to go, he puts on his seatbelt and starts the engine. he takes your hand, kisses the top of it – a habit he has made over the years - and puts it on the gear so he can hold it throughout the entire ride back.

the plan for now is to return to the hotel and get ready to fly home to osaka. the car stops at a red light. you see atsumu admiring you. “I’m so lucky to have you as mine, doll.” laughing you respond, “it wasn’ luck sum. you were making a fool out of yourself. I needed to stop you.”. the top of his ears change into a red color recalling all of his embarrassing moments trying to ask you out. you hear you toddler letting out a giggle. surprised you both look back. kaito’s biting his hand and grinning ear to ear, “pwaah...pahahh” is all you hear before atsumu parks the car and starts celebrating due to the first word his son just gave from him. you’ll do your best to make sure you won’t miss your flight; after the celebration that is of course.

 ⇒ back to m.list !!

© do not steal, repost, or translate anywhere. do not share or recommend my work on other platforms. reblogs are appreciated <33

#atsumu miya #atsumu x reader #miya atsumu fluff #atsumu fluff #atsumu x y/n #atsumu x you #haikyuu msby #msby atsumu #haikyuu dads #haikyuu!! #feedback is appreciated #thank you for reading #:))) <3 #have a wonderful day #miya twins #miyans #tsum tsum #sumu #tsumu

[tyxoxo]

Feel It

pairing: jaehyun x fem!reader

genre: smut, pornstar!jaehyun au, 00’ dream inserts

words: 5.1k

warnings: pure filth, exhibitionism/voyeurism, degrading, choking/breath play, humiliation, dacryphilia, sex toys, ball gag, shibari, allusion to cum play, unprotected sex

a/n: san francisco armory, das the setting lolol (thanks kink.com 🫡)  also!! since the reader would have no way of knowing the names of 00’, hopefully i did a good enough job describing them for you all to know who is who sksks.

—

“okay, we’ll just have you sign this.” the producer with the name tag K said as he handed you a clipboard with a pen; the two of you sitting across each other in a large auditorium. 

you were fidgeting the more you sat there in the middle of the “playroom”, excitement rising with every glance of the various s&m props placed on  antique plaques. whether it was the torture rack, assorted floggers, or cattle prods, you couldn’t wait to try it all.

never in your years of living did you expect to be at an armory-turned-BDSM studio, preparing to do your first adult scene. yet here you were, only wearing a pair or your underwear, completely bare everywhere else. 

the use of a National Guard armory was oddly fitting for the company—20th century Moorish Revival architecture, albeit refurbished, still gave a sense of “grittiness” and rustic charm.

 “i know that you already submitted your online waiver but we just like to have an additional one for in-person. physical signatures are always preferred.” K snapped you out of your thoughts for a second, though your mind couldn’t help but drift back into the depths—thinking yet again to your upcoming scene.

the single sheet of paper reiterated everything you read through just a week prior:

“Mission Statement and Company Values”

typical header to start a waiver…littered with the expectations to provide a “consensual and safe space for all participants.”

your eyes scanned further down, taking a few minutes to read their “Right to Distribute Media:

By signing here, you agree to having any and all media in your presence posted to our website Kink.com, with potential distribution to other pornographic partnerships…”

you provided your signature for the two spots provided, officially sealing away what modesty you had left.  

as soon as you handed the clipboard back to K, he spoke into his bluetooth earpiece, presumably notifying the other producers of your newly sealed fate, “you guys are good to head this way.” he said before placing the clipboard on the floor next to his water bottle. 

“in a moment you’ll be able to meet your partner, and go over the do’s and don'ts, that kind of stuff.” he said, followed by a closed-mouth smile.

you smiled back, trying to hide the anxiety creeping under your skin. there was no telling what kind of man would appear through those doors, meters away from where you sat.

you kept your eyes trained on the entrance, tapping your leg up and down to pass what seemed like hours.

but then again, this was a four story building…maybe it was just taking them a while to get to where you were. 

just as you looked down at your twiddling thumbs, the heavy sound of the double-doors filled the room. the man that appeared was unlike anyone you’ve ever seen. 

he was gorgeous…

and he smiled as soon as he laid eyes on you. his dimples being the first feature that caught your attention. 

he strutted towards you, confidence exuding with every step. he only sported boxer briefs, definitely nowhere near as self-conscious as you, now that you saw his toned body. 

you tried not to make it obvious that you were eyeing his subtle six-pack. but it was hard. his body was perfect; not too overbearing, not too ordinary. still, his biceps and his quads showcased the work he put in to maintain his physique. 

the last you could observe before he stopped in front of you, was his happy trail, leading all the way to the package he had confined in his briefs. he completely ignored K, standing right in front of his field of view. 

your eyes slowly made their way to his face, still smiling so bright, with ivory teeth to match. 

“hello, my name is jaehyun. nice to meet you.” 

his voice was velvety deep, baritone. 

another surprise to you. 

jaehyun held out his right hand, but you noted the single platinum band adorned on his left ring finger, to your disappointment. 

your thoughts were outlandish, there’s no way you’d have a chance with him even if he wasn’t taken.

you returned the handshake, voice visibly shaken as you gave him your name.

“i’ll go ahead and let you guys have the floor. i’ll be back in 10.” K said with a clear of his throat. he then gave up his seat for jaehyun, making his leave towards the double-doors.

jaehyun looked back at the medieval-styled chair before sitting down, chiseled thighs growing in size once he found a comfortable position.

“so tell me a bit about yourself…”

he leaned forward in his seat, placing his hands criss-cross in between his thighs. 

the simple action of trying to close the distance between the two of you, paired with his now sultry-tone, caused you to gulp quite noticeably.

“i uhhh, this is—s-sorry i can’t form my words today.” you covered your mouth as you laughed, embarrassed by the effect jaehyun had on your intelligibility.

if only you noticed his faint smile. 

“would it be better if i asked you something different?” he spoke with a tilt of his head, bangs sweeping softly across his eyelashes.

“no its not that…i’m just not super interesting.” you pursed your lips together, shameless in admitting how average you were. 

“i highly doubt that. for you to come here, i know that you’re more interesting than you let on.”

he smirked to himself, dimples even more pronounced as he looked down at your feet.

“so what do you like…don’t like? or what are you willing to try today?” 

he looked back up at you, but the ability to maintain eye contact with him was becoming harder and harder.

but for you to have come this far, sitting almost-nude in front of a stranger…there was no use in being shy anymore.

“i’ve just always wanted to be controlled, dominated, humiliated…reduced to nothing, pretty much.” you spoke matter-of-factly, knowing he’s probably heard this all before. 

you decided to keep your eyes on his mouth, and then his sharp canine’s that gleamed under the warm sepia light as he licked his lips. 

“what about degrading?”

“definitely.”

“shibari?”

“yes.”

he continued to list everything that came to mind, making it somewhat easier for you to communicate your needs and expectations.

by now, barely 7-minutes in, jaehyun learned that you were practically open to anything. 

“one last thing. the most important.”

you raised your eyebrows at his sudden announcement, already having an idea of what it could be.

“what’s your safeword?”

“olive.”

                           —☽༓☾—

“alright, we’ll go ahead and get started. if you at any time need to take a break, just let us know. remember, there is no time limit, and most of all, enjoy yourselves.” one of the producers said while adjusting his camera.

now in the auditorium with you and jaehyun, were two different producers, with the names I and N; an obvious attempt to mirror their company, which definitely made it easier to recall. K was nowhere to be found this time. but you weren’t concerned about that anymore. 

the entire auditorium was now your’s, filled with all the props to make your fantasies come true. the chairs were pushed away, and the camera’s were now rolling.

jaehyun stood face-to-face, still in only his boxer briefs. he studied the floor beneath you, seeming to psych himself up with a smirk. 

you didn’t even really know how to stand, or carry yourself, fearing that too much focus on the lesser details would ruin your adrenaline. 

just as you watched his head rise to your level, you were swept away by a kiss.

he was as spirited as you hoped, using his left hand to hold onto your cheek, and the other to rest against your hip. still through the shock of how soft his lips were, you managed to taste the balm that he chose to wear—peach with a hint of vanilla. 

you raised your hand to wrap around the wrist that kept hold of your cheek, eventually closing more of the gap between the two of you. 

despite how delicate the kisses were at first, you could hear them echo throughout the auditorium, surely to get louder once you could taste more of him.

you tried your best to keep up with the different angles that his head moved, but thinking back to the fact that these were among the first kisses you shared, you could bear the inconsistencies until you found a proper rhythm. 

so far, he did everything right. starting off slow just how you liked it… just how you told him just a few minutes prior. 

his left hand caressed your cheek back and forth, brushing against the small hairs in front of your ear. the other made its way down to your ass, gripping tightly, but not without your breath hitching through the fiery embrace.

he took the opportunity like you had guessed, to brush his tongue against your own, finally gaining more out of the subtle start towards your undoing. 

you had only known him for roughly half an hour, yet you already felt in tune with his way of leading you to pure bliss. 

he intertwined with you effortlessly, regardless of the mess the two of you made with just your lips. combined saliva pooled at the corners of your mouth, and you found yourself whimpering at his attempts to clean up the remnants with his warm tongue.

“you’re making a mess already?”

he spoke against the corner of your mouth, the smell of vanilla becoming even more evident from his suckled lips. 

you didn’t want to give in so soon to his early teasing. he needed to do more.

though you realized within a flutter of your hooded eyes, that he needed just as much as you. without any warning, he flipped his warm persona, the hand that held your cheek moving down to grip your throat tight. 

his fingertips knew exactly where to apply pressure, causing you to wince as the sting resonated on both sides of your neck. your hands immediately wrapped around his, knowing he liked to see you struggle.

you had made a point of that too. 

“you won’t say anything? what about when i do this?” his face remained mere centimeters away from you, denying you of any further kisses. 

you could see through the haze that his dimples were still just as evident from his now-sinister smile. 

his right hand cupped your clothed core, causing you to shudder against his palm. 

he would definitely be able to feel your growing arousal through the thin material. 

“maybe you don’t deserve any of this…i should just leave you here.”

he backed up his shaming effortlessly, all the while palming you through your damp underwear. 

the friction felt electric against your clit, causing you to buck against his touch.

“ride my fucking hand.” he smirked right in front of your face, like a complete switch from the gentleman you just met.

you were sure that you looked pathetic, getting off to just the palm of his hand. practically humping to get some sort of release. 

being self-conscious no longer mattered, not when he provided you with a means to an end. proving not only to yourself, but to future viewers that you were outwardly desperate.

the more zealous you got with your gyrating hips, the more jaehyun was inclined to stop and just watch you yearn for it.

he decided immediately, stilling his movements. 

for the first time, you whined.

“please let m-me cum.” your voice barely produced any sound, restricted from his hold on your throat. 

“should i?” 

“mmh, yes. please…” 

you hoped that your look of pity was convincing enough. 

“go on and show me then. show me that you deserve it.” 

he gave you free reign, lessening the hold on your throat, and continuing to keep his palm still against your aching core.

you were practically salivating, trying your hardest to hit a certain spot along your sensitive nub. with a few more hellish rolls of your hips, you succeeded, feeling that familiar high surge through your body. 

jaehyun was beyond satisfied, enjoying how you broke down from barely nothing. his eyes drifted over every part of your trembling body, mentally noting the parts that would be destroyed by the time he was done with you.

as you started to come down, he had already tugged your underwear off, even taking a moment to smell the now-ruined fabric. he could’ve spent longer doing so, showing off his guise for as long as he wanted.

but you were fidgeting quite noticeably, shifting your thighs to subdue the constant throbbing of your clit. it was obvious there was more to come.

once he tossed the flimsy fabric to the side, he ushered you towards the far left of the room where two red velvet sofas were positioned against the wall, and a small antique dresser sat in between. 

you could barely keep up with his stride as he interlocked your hands together. but you let him control your movements, until you were centered in the middle of the makeshift formal room.  

on top of the dresser were bundles of rope, a ball gag and a vibrating wand, with images of all the ways you would be ruined flooding your brain. your eyes then drifted up towards the ceiling, immediately catching sight of the metal ring hanging just above you.

the cameras were paused momentarily; had the recording continued, the producers would’ve captured your look of wonder as you watched jaehyun gather the jute material onto his arm to begin the process. 

you’d only had a few experiences with bondage, but all of the preparation seemed to come naturally as you followed jaehyun’s instructions. he was patient and soft-spoken with his directions, all the while marveling at how pretty you looked while listening to him. 

it was evident he was experienced in the art of shibari, as he adjusted the intricate designs to fit the contour of your body within minutes. your eyes were conflicted on where to look, whether it was his concentration or the way the rope cupped your breasts perfectly. either way, you felt beautiful. 

“take deep breaths for me, you’re doing great.” 

his sultry tone was enough to relax you as you felt gravity disappear under your feet.

your eyes remained shut as you inhaled and exhaled, gradually soaking in the feeling of complete ascension. 

you were in the most exposed position—frogtied. suspended upwards, arms secured behind your back, knees bent, and ankles bound to your thighs. 

even though it took a while to get into this arrangement, he made you feel comfortable, and you were still just as wet, eagerly awaiting his next move.

“how do you feel? talk to me.” he stood in front of your suspended body, watching your face for any signs of discomfort. there was anything but, you surprisingly felt purified, as if a literal weight had been lifted. 

“i feel good.” 

you weren’t the best at exclaiming your feelings, but you could tell that jaehyun sensed your approval.

“anything pinching or pulling?” he asked again, leaning in close to inspect the knots littered across your body. 

“nope.” 

“okay good. just wanted to check before i put this on.” he replied while giving the “ok” hand signal for the producers to resume rolling. 

he stepped over to the dresser, grabbing the black leathered ball gag. your pussy involuntarily clenched around air at the sight of the large red ball, and the realization that you were now being filmed in suspension, every bit of your cunt on display for the world to see.

you licked your lips one last time before he placed the gag. the taste of plastic overtook your senses, unfortunately masking the remnants of his lips balm. nonetheless, you felt complete, relishing in your own fantasy being brought to life.

saliva managed to escape not even seconds later, dribbling onto your chin. jaehyun eyes grew dark, switching back to the sadist he truly was.

your eyes tracked his every move, watching as he finally exposed himself.

you wished you were well-spoken enough to describe how perfect he was. but you could only manage whimpers through your restraints, hoping that he heard your reaction to seeing his lower half for the first and probably only time.

you were finally able to see where his happy trail ended, branched out into a sea of nicely trimmed hair. his length stood proud, snapping back onto his outie bellybutton as he kicked his briefs off to the side.

he stepped over to the dresser one last time, grabbing the vibrating wand. you were expecting the sound of the device to come to life, even squinting your eyes to brace for the feeling of it hitting your clit. but instead he kept it down by his left side, while his right finger came up to collect the saliva that had now leaked down your neck. 

“not yet…you’ll have to prove that you’re worth my time. i don’t reward sluts that whine in my face.” his words hit you hard, but his finger worked even harder.

your body began to shake as he used his slicked forefinger to paint a trail down the center of your chest. he eventually found your nipple that had swelled through the coarse rope, pinching hard.

he released quickly, doing the same to the other. 

his right finger continued its descent, now finding your cunt that was glistening under the warm lighting. he seemed satisfied enough from the sight of your juices dripping onto the floor meters below you. 

your breathing grew ragged as you felt him group his digits together to press against your sensitive nub. he leaned further into you, preventing you from seeing him work your pussy into overdrive.

the filthy sounds of your essence sloshing against the flesh of his fingers filled the room, even overpowering the pathetic moans that tried to escape through the soaked ball gag.

“think you could cum again? hmm?” 

he cooed against your ear, determined to kick all of your senses over the edge.

you failed miserably at producing a coherent “yes” through the pleasure, and you feared this would have consequences.

the high was building up a second time, but unfortunately it was met with jaehyun’s cruelty.

he backed away from you completely, leaving you there to wiggle in the ropes that kept you hungry and docile.

“yes…i can do it.” you words were muffled at best, barely audible. but your body showed enough of your desperation, trying to move within the confines of your unrelenting submission. 

“fucking filthy whore…you’re too late.” 

jaehyun tortured you by staying back, twirling the vibrating wand in his hands. 

regardless of the fact you were granted an orgasm moments ago, you made it known that you deserved another.  

tears began to pool in your eyes, eventually flowing from your eyelids onto your warm cheeks. breathing seemed more difficult, as you sniffled and heaved against the ball gag.

jaehyun looked down at the floor, in awe at the amount of your juices that had hit the floor. you were more than soaked, practically painting the floor in an abstract design of delicious filth. usually he was able to drag out teasing for a while with his other “co-stars” but for you, his patience was wearing thin; not out of distaste, but out of the eagerness to finally feel your walls around his cock. he would have to fuck you soon, so he could see if you felt just as good as you looked.

he had done plenty of scenes, even similar to this; more than he could count. and none short of bragging, he ruined every single one of them, and you were no exception. 

without a second thought, jaehyun stepped up to you, placing the vibrator on your engorged clit. a shriek escaped through the gag as you slumped in the ropes, head falling backwards as a wave of relief hit you. 

finally, you were given more.

through your hooded eyes, you were unable to see his erect tip awaiting your entrance. 

“are you happy now? what do you say?” he gripped your jaw hard, forcing your head forward to stare into his dark eyes. 

“thank you s-so much…thank-...”

your gratitude was cut short as he pushed himself inside you. 

a guttural groan fell from his glossy lips as he paused halfway, utterly amazed by the way your walls welcomed his cock, trying his best to draw out the way you sucked him in. 

he could’ve stayed like this forever, relishing in your ability to grip him for dear life. 

“you’re so fucking tight…did you save this pussy for me?” his voice was just as shaky as yours, completely high off the energy that filled the room.

you nodded your head up and down, mind too absorbed in the pleasure that overtook your body.  

your eyes blew wide as he continued to inch himself further inside your dripping hole; beyond satisfied from being stretched full. 

you watched his jaw go slack as he bottomed out, pupils dilating not only in front of you, but the cameras too. 

the realization that everyone would witness his transformation, caused you to contract around his length; the vibrator intensifying your actions as if you no longer had control. 

he wasted no time thrusting inside you, hips snapping against yours in an immediate, steady rhythm. your body recoiled against his tireless momentum, eventually swinging from the metal ring every time he connected his tip to your cervix. 

“do you think you could hold out sweetheart?” 

you were sure that you could, but you couldn’t help but entertain the idea that it was much deeper than that. 

nonetheless, you mumbled “yes”, hoping to prove your worth so that he would never stop fucking you senseless. 

yet again, your head fell back, pitiful howls escaping through the gag as you felt your orgasm building up a second time. 

“come on, look at me. watch me fuck this pussy.” he used his non occupied hand to usher your head forward, watching you choke up as many moans as you could through the soiled gag. 

he continued to support your head, and it became obvious that it was done for a reason. the sound of the double-doors caught your attention soon after, echoing through the auditorium. your eyes looked past jaehyun’s broad shoulders to catch sight of the four attractive figures that appeared. 

their presence would be burned inside your mind forever—an aura of complete deviance, walking towards your suspended frame with an obvious intent to ravage you beyond repair. 

your eyes couldn’t look away, not even with jaehyun still drilling inside your pussy. 

you noted the two tallest, one with wavy silver hair, and bangs long enough to cover his dark eyes. he had the most  chiseled features out of the four, with full lips to complement his sharp jawline. the other didn’t look nearly as intimidating as the first, with rounded facial features despite having a broader frame. he adorned blue eyes, which you assumed to be contacts. either way, the sky blue color fit his chocolate hair, setting him apart from his yang counterpart.

the third reminded you of a sunset, with golden skin that radiated far beyond his charming presence. his jet black hair offered contrast to his warm exterior. 

the final one—the blonde, surprised you the most, he didn’t seem like the type to present himself in this type of environment, but maybe that was his ruse—to deceive anyone into thinking he wasn’t as filthy as the next. he made sure to be the last one following behind in the ensemble, but you still noted his elfen-like appearance, seeming delicate yet playful. 

they were all just as flawless as jaehyun. 

you would have to refer to them by their features, as there was no indication of their names. truthfully, the idea that you may never know, made this all the more fulfilling. letting four strangers do whatever they wanted to you, was the pinnacle of desire. 

the silver-haired boy made sure to greet you first, standing next to your right side. though you weren’t sure if gripping your chest through the rope was a proper greeting, it still caused you to whimper from his robust touch. he squeezed your nipples harder than jaehyun, watching you crumble from his assault. 

“another slut for me to fuck with hmm? you better hope you make this worth my while.” he snarled against your ear, taking the time to tug your earlobe between his teeth. the kisses that followed were messier than the brunette that stood to your left. you made sure to make eye contact with him and acknowledge his existence despite his silver-haired fiend stealing the show with his unhinged words. the blue-eyed boy had a smug grin on his face, caressing your cheek with no care in the world that your saliva had covered his fingers. 

he began to pecker along your collarbone, keeping his eyes locked onto your own, tongue swiping upwards to taste the sweat that had formed on your flushed skin. 

“i bet she’s been good so far?” the brunette’s voice caught you off guard, completely teasing, even mocking your predicament. you saw him look forward at jaehyun, then down at the vibrator that was still pressed against your clit.

you hoped to god that he would grab and use it on you. that any of them would use it on you.

“hell yeah she’s been good. taking my cock like a good little slut.” jaehyun licked along his upper lip, baring his canine’s again. 

“here...i know she’s close.”

jaehyun offered the vibrator to the brunette, the sensation temporarily leaving your core. you whined in dissatisfaction, hoping it wouldn’t be off you for too long. 

“you’re so pretty…” 

the blonde haired boy soothed your worries, coming up beside the brunette. his hands were noticeably smaller than the rest, but still just as skillful. he took his slender fingers and began to rub your abused clit in circles. the pads of his fingers were a few degrees colder, but it soon warmed up after making contact with your heated skin. 

you jumped, as best as you could, when he increased the pace, and began swiping his entire hand across your wet mound. the sounds of your juices splashing past his digits bounced off of the walls of the auditorium. 

he truly proved your point of his devious nature. 

the golden boy rushed to jaehyun’s left side, getting a clear view of the mess you kept making. his hands trailed down to palm himself through his black denim jeans. even through your tears, you watched him bite his lip, hard enough to make the skin underneath go pale.

you were so close. 

“pl…please. i’m cl…” you thought your words had drifted off into the void, overpowered by the multitude of bodies in the room, but they didn’t go unnoticed. 

“awwh, she’s gonna cum. so wet, so pretty…” the fairy teased, taking the time to lower his mouth to your knee, making sure that he had made at least one mark on your skin by the time the evening was over.

the familiar band from within your core snapped. a wave of pleasure surged from your core all the way up to where the silver-haired boy had gripped your throat. moans managed to escape through the hold he had on your neck, stinging against his palms as he squeezed harder and harder.

the sea of white that flashed across your vision had turned red when the fairy’s hand left you and the vibrator took his place. the brunette’s smile grew wide when he witnessed first-hand what overstimulation looked like, and for him to be the one to blame, made an obvious power trip show across his cheshire grin. 

you were completely ruined. it was evident by the way you began to convulse, the way you cried out, the way your walls continued to contract around jaehyun’s cock. 

“fuckkk, just like that. you're sucking me in so hard. keep doing that sweetheart…”

jaehyun chanted out, an indication that he was close to exploding inside of you.

“take that ball gag off, i wanna hear her scream…” the golden boy directed the fairy to do his bidding, not wanting to pause on his own self-gratification. he had already freed his cock from his boxers, nowhere near patient enough to pull his pants the rest of the way down. 

you weren’t still enough for the blonde as he tried freeing the clasp behind your head. eventually with the help of his silver-haired friend, you were finally able to voice your sounds of another orgasm. 

“i’m gonna cum again!!” you screamed out, making the rest of them smirk with pride.

“are you even gonna say thank you? ungrateful whore…” the same one that had been giving you the most hell, spat against your ear. his words made it all the more damning; you enjoyed how he tested your mental stability. 

“thank you! thank you so much!” 

you were sure that you looked broken, slumped from the actions of these four strangers and of course, jaehyun, who was just as close.

his thrusts were beginning to show cracks, losing the rhythm he had held onto for so long. the two of you stared at each other, in your own world as you both came. 

with one final snap of his hips, he let out a moan, pumping you full of his seed with every inhale and exhale. 

your voice gave out, vocal chords spent from all of the prior screams you produced during your time of luxury.

your mouth hung open as you felt him fill your walls to the brim, creating a salacious mixture that bubbled inside your painted walls.  

even though the vibrator had stopped, a phantom sensation caused you to tremble against the now-still wand. 

all that remained was the comedown. and you weren’t sure you wanted it to end.

jaehyun remained inside you, drawing out the aftermath of your back-to-back orgasm. a thin sheet of sweat decorated his chest, illuminating under the tan lights.

your breathing had finally calmed down, and by the time you tried to get a good look at everyone, they were already huddled around jaehyun, waiting to see the creampie. 

their eyes followed jaehyun’s every move, watching as he exited you with a single plop.

“i’m first.” the silver-haired boy spoke quickly, immediately lowering himself to be level with your weeping hole. 

it was obvious that this wasn’t over. and you were more than okay with that.

_

//tagging: @pradajaehyun @glitchfiles @stargrll13 @the-universe-in-you-jjh

#jaehyun smut #jeong jaehyun smut #jaehyun x reader #jeno smut #jeno x reader #haechan smut #haechan x reader #nct 127 smut #nct dream smut #feedback is appreciated <3

[waterfallofspace]

When H/awks gets a voice message from D/abi, he doesn't have a clue what he's getting into. (Strongly implied kink!Hawks)

First H/otwings wav~ (and content at all~). It's nothing super big, just a little idea I've had for a bit, and I had time to throw something together~ Mayyybe the fact (most of) it's a voice message can forgive the quality issues? <3

#waterfallwav #I've been wanting to do another wav for a little bit #and finally got the house free to record! #i find their voices SO much fun #even if im not GOOD at them #i have a blast trying hahaha~ #also wanna give a lil 'in-the-tags' thank you to people who have requested wavs #or given feedback to any of them!! #it really means so much to know people not only LIKE them #but care enough to say 'hey- heres my suggestion on what to work on to get better' #im the type to not realllly believe compliments (even tho i do APPRECIATE them) #so having someone (especially someone ID consider talented at it) #be like hey. this is how you can get better but its still good either way #that means the world to me <333 #ALRIGHT ALRIGHT I'll stop rambling in these tags hahaha~ #you know who you are and if you see this- thank you <3 #thanks for listening and I hope you enjoy!! #d/abi #h/otwings #h/awks

[zepskies]

Absolutely LOVING the take me home series so far 💚💚

Thank you so much, lovely!! I'm very glad to hear that you're enjoying Take Me Home. 🥰💓💓

It's been such a fun series to work on while getting a feel for Beau's character! And I can't wait for you guys to see what I have in store for Part 7...

#ask me stuff #reader appreciation #take me home feedback #Part 7 coming soon! #beau arlen #beau arlen x reader #beau arlen x you #beau arlen x female reader #big sky #big sky season 3 #😘 #zepskies answers