#i also know how this ends. 💀

[rapidhighway]

Anon back again, what's the story to your organic metal au?

The last ask response has given me many questions, why does Metal seem nervous when Eggman greets him?

Eating up this AU, looking forward to whatever you're cooking

i mean theres a lot that has changed and a lot that i havent worked out but the basic idea was that metal somehow became organic (i have no idea how that happened xd) but because he's got no programming eggman cant force him to do his bidding and he rebels against him. He still wants to kill sonic. badly. but doesnt want to be eggmans lapdog anymore. most of this is just pure self idulgent stuff bc i want to put him in situations. a little bit of plot is in there

#i just kind of wanted some free will metal sonic #i kind of struggle with writing robots with free will #its all just tainted by programming i think and i thought it would be interesting to try writing him as a person with actual brain chemistr #lmao #ofc lets not take this too seriously its all just for fun #though i've been planning to reread the neo metal sonic parts in idw #and i wanna play heroes hihi #ALSO i just really wanted to make a design for him hehe #i made that one comic some time ago you can just search organic metal sonic on my blog and youll find it its like 3 pages #and it started with that bc i just saw that in my brain and it kinda went hard xd #(i say all of this softly and scared) #sorry im always very embarassed to share my aus ive been working on this for years TwT but im trying to free myself and be more self- #indulgent #okie bye hihi *hides* #i also know how this ends. 💀

[sopuu]

sketch dump of some guys

#i’ve been hoarding…again…..one of these dates back to june it’s time i cleaned it up💀 #also practicing how to draw these guys bc i need them for au comic purposes #mcsm #minecraft story mode #mcsm fanart #mcsm jesse #my doodles #mcsm lukas #mcsm jack #mcsm petra #mcsm romeo #mcsm admin #still don’t know what those things on jack’s pants are?? #i just went for pockets for now but err might change in the future #oh and happy bday mcsm it’s the 14th on my end but it’s gotta be the 13th elsewhere soo i’m technically not late right #edit: goddamit there was a mistake in one of them HELP #it’s gone now but if anyone noticed no you didn’t 😊 #sopuuart

[leverage-ot3]

okay I’ve seen a lot of posts about sterling just being crowley and. guys. the implications just hear me out 😭😭😭

bending lore slightly here BUT let’s say crowley’s body was once inhabited by a human and crowley is possessing the body (maybe he kills the initial inhabitant bc he doesn’t care)

but he still has the guy’s memories. he doesn’t bother keeping up appearances with his ‘ex wife’ because he is too busy building up his hell empire. BUT for some reason he can’t quite identify, he still feels something towards his ‘daughter’. he lets the divorce happen and doesn’t feel the need (or desire) to fight for custody, but he can never quite forget her, to cast her out of his mind for good

some hijinks ensue with the leverage team. it’s mostly because even a grind culture demon wants some off time every once in a while, and for him the insurance investigator stuff is more of a hobby. interacting with the leverage crew is very low stakes for him, and honestly, quite amusing. they aren’t on his level power-wise, but that ford character gives him the mental exercise he hasn’t experienced in, well, he can’t even remember

he can feel their frustration and anger when they learn he has become employed by interpol and feeds off it. it’s great, and relaxing in a way he is never able to achieve while conducting hell-related business

one year he gets wind that olivia is in a really bad situation associated with his ‘ex wife’s’ new husband. he’s selling vital hardware to terrorists, and while that might actually be the kind of chaos he would normally support or be entertained by as the king of hell, something feels wrong about letting olivia stay anywhere near that man

he calls upon the body’s adversaries. he wouldn’t admit it, even under duress, BUT he feels slightly fond of them. nate for the three dimensional chess they play, sophie for her ability to charm and disguise, parker for her chaos and slightly unsettling nature (it’s the autism swag and being bad with human interaction but he doesn’t know that lol), hardison for his unapologetic intelligence and eliot for his hardened violent past and take-no-shit persona (he’s fun to tease)

they perform exactly as he expected, right into his carefully crafted plan. and then olivia is under his care and things get more complicated. he keeps her FAR, FAR away from anything related to the supernatural (heh). no one can find out about her, ESPECIALLY not those imbecile hunter brothers (if for nothing else than the embarrassment in revealing he has a weak spot)

not sure how to work it into this post but I also want to add that somewhere along the way he develops feelings for nate and sophie. the frame up job is near and dear to my heart and you can’t convince me that isn’t fighting as flirting behavior. his interpol persona is more of a side hustle so to speak, but he finds it fun (relaxing, even) to fill that role. there aren’t any obligations of other demons, bothersome hunters, or anything like that. nate and sophie are low stakes, except, they aren’t, really. they make him feel things he can’t ever really remember feeling. his heart beats fast when sophie sat in his lap and cradled his face, his hands sweat when nate gives him that certain smug look. he’s exasperated by the way they can run circles around him like no one else has ever before. they annoy him and get under his skin in a way no one else can and it’s infuriating. but also not, at the same time. maybe he likes it

and then the long goodbye job happens

hear me out and suspend your belief here for a second, because I can’t remember if crowley supernaturally knows when ppl die/are dead or not.

so nate is in interpol custody and the interviewer is obviously out of her depth. (most people are, when it comes to nathan ford.) he walks in and pours the man a drink, but he’s fuming. somewhere along the way he came to care about the team. hell and suffering is literally in his (official) job description, but he can admit (only to himself) that he admires what they do. it’s not for him, not anything close to where his passions and interests lie, but he respects their drive and purpose. he is also aware enough to acknowledge that they are a family, a group of misfits that never belonged quite anywhere except to each other.

and nate fucking blew it up, ruined it, because his vice is being so obsessed with the end game that he is apparently willing to let his team, his family, the people that anchor him to reality, die because the ends supposedly justify the means.

not this time. not to sterling crowley

he is enraged. he can admit within the confines of his mind that he cares for nate, for sophie, even for the other three (though nate and sophie have somehow made it a hierarchy where they are more important to him. which he will dissect later in private. maybe.)

nate let them die, he let sophie die, and for what? the black book? hell below, crowley would have made things easier somehow, if he knew that this was where nate’s sights had lied. he would have prevented this somehow. he wants to have prevented this. he doesn’t want any of them dead and is too afraid to check and verify because that would make it real. the idea of sophie (or any of them) somehow making it to hell instead of heaven would probably break something in him he might not be able to repare fully.

he yells at nate- he’s angry. hellfire burning in his heart because everything is ruined. the deaths aside (however hard it is to set them aside in his mind), nate will not recover from this, not ever. this will be the start of the end, he is sure. a miserable, guilt-ridden existence where he drinks himself to death and nothing will save him. it plays out in crowley’s mind in a thousand different ways that are beyond painful to conceptualize, even in theory.

the story starts to unravel and there is a game afoot. a solemn, miserable, infuriating game because the con is still in session because parker is alive and in the building- which sets another fire alight in his chest. ‘parker even know you got hardison killed?’ he rages for her grief when she finds out. he knows it will double when she finds out eliot has perished, too, because he isn’t fucking blind.

but nate is a brilliant man, lest he forget too quickly. they are all alive, and somehow still the entire crew slips through his fingers. he’s not even angry (he never would have been- he doesn’t actually try too hard to catch them. it’s about the game, not the consequences). he lets them keep the black book because he’s fucking exhausted and honestly, they more than earned it.

‘now we’re even. tell sophie to drive carefully’. they will never be even, not really. crowley would never admit or agree that being human is the superior state of being, but that have made him feel human in a way he doesn’t actually mind. they keep him on his toes and match him in a way unique to them, they remind him that there are other things than the realm of hell. not necessarily bigger than hell, but maybe just as important in a different sense.

watching the van drive away, something inside him settles. when he walked into the interrogation room that day he thought this was the beginning of the end. it’s not the end at all, not an end to anything. it’s a continuation of their story. maybe, he thinks, a beginning to a new era in it

#before anyone says anything YES I KNOW HOW SPN LORE WORKS I WATCHED IT FOR MANY YEARS #I am just making this silly post for my own (and possibly your) amusement #I’m not digging too heavily into spn plot because I haven’t watched in forever and don’t trust my memory to make accurate commentary lol #also I know it’s probably layed but lied looked better somehow don’t worry about it #sorry this is so long I wasn’t sure where to break it to a read more bc all of it was too important to me 😭💀 #tell me in the comments if you’d prefer a read more and where you think it should go #I haven’t been into spn for years HOW DOES THIS AU HAVE SUCH A CHOKEHOLD OVER ME #eliot spencer #parker #alec hardison #leverage ot3 #parker x hardison x eliot #(background) #nate ford #sophie devereaux #jim sterling #nate x sophie #nate x sophie x sterling #crossovers #leverage x spn #leverage x supernatural #supernatural #crowley spn #crowley supernatural #crowley #leverage #mine #not even queueing this I need it posted immediately. instant gratification #pls like rb comment etc I need the validation #I ended up putting a read more for the long goodbye job

[reineydraws]

shanks reminds me of jmw turner's paintings so i wanted to put them together 💥

sketch for the painting under the cut!

#shanks #akagami no shanks #red hair shanks #red haired shanks #red force #one piece #one piece fanart #op fanart #it's kiiiiiiind of what i wanted #i was thinking about how people's eyes flash red when they use conqueror's haki #so i wanted to marry a red sunset by turner with a shanks portrait but it proved kind of difficult to balance the degree of abstraction lol #he's not as terrifying or scary or intimidating as i wanted to convey but the pro of that is that it looks more like a turner portrait #maybe one day i'll try again with a more stormy vibe but yeah the colours and emotion were pretty difficult to put down #i love turner #i tried to explore the more painterly brushes in procreate but i just ended up falling back on my favourite ones aha #the vibe i tried to capture is better conveyed in the sketch 💀 it's the shading. the shading helps convery it better #and i had to sacrifice the shading for the abstraction around his eye. ah well; learning experience! #anyways i know i just posted smth yesterday and also three hours ago but this is my blog and i will post if i want to #(i have to affirm this to myself literallt every single time i feel like im posting too much lmao) #i digress #oh btw that's a marine ship on the left about to go down from haki. jsyk.

[bevioletskies]

gemini & fourth + favorite videos (in no particular order) ↳ praew talk ep. 60

#geminifourth #fourthgemini #gemini norawit #fourth nattawat #gemfourthfave #mygifs #i love how most of this interview was about their dreams and worries and expectations and reflecting on their careers so far #and then they ended it with this 💀 #also i never know how to color videos with washed-out lighting #i always overcompensate with saturation and contrast lmao

[purple-st4rz-556]

I keep forgetting to be active here whoops....anyways it's Gorillaz Phase 1 OMG!!!!

OMFG I JSUT RELIZED THAT I DREW THE THUMB FACIND THE WROGN DIRECTION 💀💀💀

#I love 2d noodle and murdoc sm omg (sorry russel) #especially murdoc and 2d cause why are they kinda.../hj #I literally just discovered this band a week ago yet I want to go to all their concerts and buy all their merch and dvds #was gonna draw them all in a group photo but then i didn't know what the background would be so then I drew murdoc #but then I hated how I drew murdoc so I started drawing noodle #I tried experimenting a bit and used a watercolor brush for the background and for a bit of shading on noodle #also I did a thingy with her hair where I drew individual strokes of her hair cause it's really fun to do trad. #her hair ended up looking like omori hair 💀 (I still need to get into omori ngl but I'm terrible with horror) #I'm sorry if I butchered russel I cannot draw other body types at all #also drew with a crunchy pixel brush this time which it rare! #been in an art slump again so I think my art looks the same next to each other :( #anyways I need to stop yapping!!!! actual tags now #gorillaz #clip studio paint #digital art #fanart #my art #art #doodles #gorillaz phase 1 #gorillaz noodle #gorillaz fanart #gorillaz fandom #woowowowo

[skitskatdacat63]

Hey do you remember all those videos of Fernando smelling flowers? Haha yeah....

#posting this both while im asleep and after whatever bee event ends up happening #so who knows what will happen! will we get nothing? will we get eye contact? will we possibly get an interaction? its a surprise!! #anyways this is basically me hearing about seb's bee event and he said the drivers will be there #me deep in my vettonso brainrot: OH MY GOD THEY'RE GONNA BE IN THE SAME VICINITY #will be so funny for me if when i wake up i find out fernando didnt even go 😭 #but we remain hopeful 🙏 #also this is just very funny to me bcs like both seb and fernando have very specifc quirks #and what are two of their specific quirks? seb and his bee thing. fernando and his flower thing from this season #so this fanart is perfect y'know 🥰🥰🥰 #also screeching over how this is the first canon au drawing ive ever drawn. ive literally never drawn non-au until now 💀💀💀 #okay and now some horrible jokes thay happened during the process of this: #thesis of this drawing: whats Fernando gonna do? Pollinate him? 😏 #C. why did you have to make me think of bees that produce sex pollen 😭😭 this is gonna haunt me forever. but also vettonso post-japan fic- #and then also the barry benson thing. im like what do humanized bees look like and then realized 'oh no....oh no.' #fernando to seb at the bee event: 'ya like samurais...?' SORRY 😭 #also having to pick the colors from one of my historical au drawings was haunting. just the sheer difference btwn them yknow...... #anyways please take my old men yaoi. took a break from historical yaoi to draw this 😭😭😭😭 #this is my peak vettonso fanart cannot improve from here. also a fever dream #vettonso #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #catie.art. #*not gonna edit the tags bcs i like the time capsule of it all but like. yeah. we were fed. #*catie from 2 hours prior(atm its 3 am) would be so pleased right now i think

[silenthillbunni]

🌧️🫧💭

#i shouldnt have fav mutuals bc i get sooo sad when they soft block me #which *always* happens like im not joking the day will come when they're just like nahhh bye #🥲🥲 nd i cant help but get sad #nd i dont even agree w that anon who said that 'no wonder everyone blocks u' bc im never mean to anyone #i think it's just bc im fundamentally unlikable and unlovable and the time will come when smth abt me #ticks them off nd nothing abt me is ever tolerated i always have to be perfect for everyone so then i just get cut off like dead weight lmao #also it shows that i get attached so easily but in reality ... ppl are not at all as attached to me 💀💀 #like i care abt them but they dont care abt me nd it makes me feel so stupid #why do i so easily care for ppl?????? why do i have to care nd like ppl when it's always gonna end the same way #me being me is bad nd wrong and nobody could ever truly know me nd still like me #i have to live my life constantly hiding parts of myself and making sure im not too authentic or too open bc then i will make ppl dislike me #it rlly is that. im never mean. i never fight. ppl just see smth abt me nd go 'oh ewwwwww' nd then leave #nd if it hasnt already happened it will at some point nd im constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop #whenever i realize i say or did smth wrong im tense waiting for the moment where they'll leave me will arrive #ok this might sound silly bc i was like 'triggered' by smth small but like #all my life thats just how it's been. im not even mean or cruel. i just exist and ppl dont like me or who i am or what i think #i can never be truly myself anywhere. that is sure to result in being all alone 4ever. but i dont like hiding parts of myself #but i have to. but its hard when im trying to hide nd be lowkey but i still manage to make ppl dislike me T-T #idek what im supposed to do bc i just exist nd im not likable. i try to be that but im still not. idk what to do #anyway.. who cares.. j'appartiens seul #but yeah it is bc it's like this for me all the time nd ig that triggered me lmao #i mean just w my sisters.. their issue is just who i am. my personality. i havent been cruel to them. or bullied them. or put them down #they just get irritated from my personality nd who i am. thats what makes them mad. nd they kinda want me to just stop being me nd idk how #to do that and therefore we arent even talking. havent talked for a year #i wanna cry like????? what am i supposed to do??????? im so extremely fucking horrible that just by exisiting nd not being mean or cruel mak #es me unworthy of everything. idk idk like. omg i feel so stupid for being triggered by that #maybe if i had irl friends and a job and a life i wouldnt care but im a fucking loser failure worthless good for nothing idiot. ofc im this

[chibishortdeath]

Some attempts at a design for Selena :3. The second image is inspired by the wedding in Haunted Castle, but I changed Simon’s outfit cause idk I just can’t picture him being comfortable in a suit.

The last two of these are way more headcanon-y lol. They’re under a cut mostly in case my headcanons and story ideas change d(^^ ). One of them was inspired by a Kikuo song I was listening to while drawing lol, the song “Let’s Go to Heaven”.

#castlevania #castlevania games #selena belmont #castlevania selena #castlevania ii #castlevania 2 #castlevania simon’s quest #simon’s quest #castlevania ii: simon's quest #haunted castle #simon belmont #akumajou dracula #akumajo dracula #art post #my art #I remember seeing someone make a post somewhere about how it was weird that #a lot of the cut items from the first Castlevania were things like high heels and a love letter and stuff #I wonder if Simon’s wife/girlfriend was supposed to be a character at one point in it and she got cut for some reason #idk it’s interesting to me that she’s only ever appeared in like deliberately noncanon content ya know? #like Haunted Castle was even called not a Castlevania game by its own lead director #the two novels with Simon girlfriends in them were never intended to be canon just fun side stuff #especially the ones that were choose your own adventure books lol I love the art style in one of those #anyway I’ve been trying to think of ways to write her lately but its so easy to end up accidentally falling into annoying tropes alas 💀💀💀 #especially ones the series has already used before oof #currently my idea so far is since Simon himself is kinda the chosen one hero guy trope in CV1 #and ends up subverting that trope by genuinely failing a ton getting hated by the public and possibly dying at the end #maybe Selena might work as initially the damsel in distress and call to action trope and subverts that later???? #I also have always thought she ends up the Mysterious Woman somehow hmmmm #it’s a hard headcanon to incorporate without just pulling a Dracula X chronicles and oh no she’s a vampire aaaaa but that’s been done 💀 #I am also aware that not everything you write has to be 100% completely new and original and perfect but aaaaaaa

[todayisafridaynight]

would it be okay if u told me why u like aoki😭/gen😭😭😭😭BEEN TRYNA LIKE HIM FOR SO LONG I JUST CANTT but i love ur art so much so i still consume it otherwise lol

i liked tohru adachi in high school and tbh i think that alone is enough of an explanation for why i ended up liking aoki

#snap chats #haha see i told you last post's tags were relevant #anyway vLKVJEVLKAEJVLKJ IM CRYING ANON youre so funny. this is the funniest ask i coulda got thank you so much #i dont know why i like him either <- yes i do #fine lets get Real Talk about it #well first off all i thought he looked hot rolling out the elevator and i was playing the eng dub and i think his voice sounds hot there #and thats like. not athing that happens to me ever <- literally thought sawashiro was hot two frames into the game but anyway #i like politician characters. or characters that are in a position of power ESPECIALLY if they have to act like they dont suck balls #like i very much love the idea of the power of charisma and that type of thing not to mention the 'strategizing' as aoki puts it #that comes with politics. LIKE HE SUCKS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE SUCKS BUT //shrug emoji// #like its why i love the mine rggo stories i like seeing mine's thought process and how he uses his intelligence #smart's sexy to me idk what to tell you but moving on #its fun watching him lose his cool too ESP IN HIS FIGHT LMAO HE STOMPIN HIS FOOT LIKE A TODDLER SHUT UP #i also really love the arakawa family in general and thinking of aoki's relationship with each of them makes my brain explode #especially him and sawashiro that shit is painful to watch and i love it so much #i also thought him going from goth to republican was the funniest shit in the world like i howled at that AND i was distraught #aokis so interesting to me from the notion that he IS loved by his family but he has so much hatred for himself it eats him up #and as a result he cant be happy no matter what he does- how hes constantly seeking validation even if it's nothing meaningful #his lil. Dog-Eat-Dog world world belief to ichi also appealed to my edgy depressed high schooler brain. sorry. #his speech at the lockers also got to me. unfortunately. sorry everyone i empathized too hard it got too real it wasnt funny anymore #like as much as i complain bout the very end the ending is what solidified me liking aoki if not also cause of ichi's impact in those scene #plus... analyzing him and the environment around him is so much fun too.... #idk reasons for why i like aoki also boil down to personal reasons. he still sucks tho so i cant be upset when people hate him LOL #i probably have more reasons or could elaborate more i love rambling but i mean. who really wants to read all that 💀💀 #maybe for a character that WASNT the worst but. aoki is so LMAO #thank you for loving my art regardless :) im sorry i have to be attached to the worst guys ever

[hauntingblue]

chopper has become catholic

#poor chopper :((( also sanji hutting soldiers with zoro lmao #how is chopper soloing perospero AND queen??? wtf someone help him??? #nvm sanji is here.... queen taking all the arrows cause sanji applied a tangential force to his neck ahdjahskajskq #helicopter helicopter..... 🚁 🚁 🚁 #sanji you tell em.... luffy will rise jusg like jesus christ once again. gum gum amen. #zoro bandaged as a cross represents his unwavering faith in luffy. sanji carrying the cross represents how strong his faith in luffy is. #oh jesus kinemon...... yamato come back...... yamato....... #kinemon you ate this child's father now..... konemon get up!!!! KINEMON!!!! #kinemon dead kiku dead and momo hears luffys voice... he will come back omg of course 🥺🥺🥺 i might have shed a tear.... but god... #i am more defeated than anything.... luffy won't die but kiku.... kinemon.... damn.... #talking tag #watching one piece #episode 1036 #YAMATOOO!!! YAMATOOO!!!!! momo to the sea too??... jesus..... #ZEUS SOUL HAS MERGED WITH THE CLIMA TACT???? #big mom and kid just yapping..... get to the fighting!!! law joined in!!! another yapper.... #toko....... where is hiyori.... #ULTI AGAIN???? ZEUS ATTACK!!!!! OH SHIT!!!!! END HER NAMI!!!!! #they found luffy <3 YAMATO GET KAIDO!!!! well get momo.... #episode 1037 #who designed the heart pirates submarine.... [DEATH]💀😁💀 [DEATH] #luffy is above water and so is momo..... oof. #nami's face naming zeus ajdhssjsbshs ooooh nami's bolts now have redirects akdhakajak YEAAHHH!!!! #tama what a powerhouse heehee #oh yamato.............. #episode 1038 #hamlet just beating up all his own soldiers... #the snake one too.... also his animal is so funny.... the snake makes both of his legs and also a cunty accessory.... #usopp ajdjahjsajaj sanji will save his babygirl... i know it.... YEAAHHH!!!! #CHOPPER TURNED EVEN SMALLER AKDHAKEJSK

[quarterprioritymidnight]

people who assume laura palmer is about one of dan's girlfriends seeing the 'i killed laura palmer' merch

#personal #i love that hes now just selling knock off twin peaks merch as bastille merch and hoping no one notices #love the concept #unfortunately do still think its ugly #does this band know how desperate i am to give them my money i literally hoover up the old bastille merch on depop #and yet i have bought NONE of the bbx merch so far #and i know i will at tour for the nostalgia™ #but like same for gmtf like i just ended up going with the least ugly thing cause it was all so bad 😭 #also 'one of dan's girlfriends' was meant to be like ex or current not to imply polygamy 💀

[skillzissuez]

Depression is all fun and games until your skipping school even though you’re weeks behind because you quite literally can’t get out of bed

#god I hate it here #not to mention you mother and father #SEEING this #simply decides to ignore you like your Alr dead #like damn okay 💀💀 fuck you too ig 💀💀 #I don’t know how to fix this #I’m literally gonna be held back or taken to court bc I’ve missed so many days #but oh well the sillies r keeping me alive #Also I told myself I wouldn’t vent online anymore but I honestly don’t care anymore 😭 #it’s so bad though #I tried to do some of my homework last night and ended up throwing up from the stress #and it’s not like my friends just forgot about me they are GOOD friends I’ve just been pushing them away; telling them I’m just sick etc. #it’s my fault so I’m not mad at them for not knowing what to do. The closest ones try to call me #sometimes I answer and we talk. sometimes I don’t and they leave me a message abt how their a good listener and they KNOW something’s wrong. #Truly I love my friends but at this point I just need to be medicated or in a mental institution ong #but again; it’s not like my parents actually care. they canceled my therapy that was court appointed to me #My support system otherwise is gone; my older siblings have moved out and I’m supposed to protect my younger ones from my parents #but deadass my entire family is well aware that I’m useless in that department #I shake scream and sob everytime my parents yell at us so I’m no help; really #I mean recently I’ve been able to keep my emotions under control but the only reason why is because I’m dead inside 💪 #As I’m typing this out I’m realizing that I should be telling the world this especially not in my mental state but like. I dunno 🤷‍♂️ #I know most of you don’t care or if you do your just concerned or feel bad bc you know what it’s like and I thank you. #seriously; I thank you for being human and reminding me the world can be kind #if anything im just distracting myself from whatever this is. whether it be playing a silly game or drawing about said silly game it helps #but it also makes me feel guilty bc I RLLY should be focused on trying to pass this year. but I’m pretty sure it’s too late now. #anyways; that’s why I’ve been inactive lately so I apologize #it’s funny bc I’m typing this out but I rlly don’t feel anything while explaining this to you guys #I’ll tag this properly; I don’t know why I’m posting this and I might delete it later I dunno #tw vent #tw mention of abuse

[chrisbangs]

hello... (and bye ig 👋)

#👋😭 hi... #i haven't come on in about a month and i didn't realize a month passed by like that... i've kinda stopped using any apps on my phone #i barely even talk to my friends anymore lol 😭 #i just saw my follower count this morning and realized i hit 13k and i was like 🥸 huh... #uhhhhhhh 😭 idk i wanted to say thank you i guess 🫂 #i'm done with stayblr and tumblr in general 😭 this much has been obvious for a while now... i tried to fit myself back in during 5star but #i think i realized i've outgrown the vibes here and in online spaces in general... i don't really enjoy it anymore 😭 which is weird cause #i've used tumblr since i was in middle school so 🫡 end of an era some would say... #i think it sucks because i don't have the same feelings about this place or skz or anything in my life right now... i tried to ignore it bu #it's so obvious now that the entirety of december passed without me really talking to a single person / without me using social media / #without me really doing much except for like homework and assignments lmao #i think genuinely i've stopped enjoying everything i used to like and i don't know why 😭 it hit me the other day bc i don't even enjoy #pc collecting anymore which is CRAZY considering how much time and money i've put into that hobby so 👋🥸 who knows what goes on #i haven't consumed any skz content since rockstar dropped 😭 and that also feels weird to me... idk... i would say maybe i'm going through a #depressive episode but i don't really feel how i do then... i think i'm just tired like i always am and that's just how i am now .. i think #i'm just not really interested in things anymore? weird but .. yeah idk😭 if i knew what was wrong i would Fix It sndjdndkd mostly i'm just #sad because i haven't been talking to friends... i keep ignoring everyone and not replying to any texts from anyone because ???? #i tell myself i will do it later but i know i won't ... idk i genuinely don't know why i'm struggling to talk to ppl anymore 😭 i've become #even more of a reclusive hermit than i already was 💀 and the worst part is i feel normal abt it #i don't feel /bad/ i just feel guilty that i'm not replying to ppl bc i don't want to hurt ppls feelings... on my end i feel Normal abt it #like i ??? is it weird that i'm so detached from everything that not even a month ago made me so happy..? that's weird right 😭 like idgi #i don't feel (as) depressed (as i usually do) but clearly ?? smth is wrong ?? like ik i'm not a clingy sentimental person but ? it kinda #makes me sad wondering if i really don't care abt ppl anymore ... but i think 😭 it's also the object permanence issues that come with adhd #not seeing or talking to the ppl i love . not doing my hobbies or seeing the groups i care abt . makes it easy to not care or forget what #they make me feel etc etc ... i get it... but idk 😭 if that's what this is . well wow it sucks ASS.. cause i feel guilty for not feeling #anything at all ... 😭 idk how to explain that HENSKDNISJS anywayyyy 💀 #i came on cause i wanted to say thank you for 13k followers 😭‼️ and that i probably will not be online anymore unless i really want to say #this was a really long winded way to say i feel bad but i'm done with stayblr fr 👋🥸 i tried so hard for the last 2 years to make it feel #like home again but it stopped ages ago so 🥹 that's ok.. i still cherish my memories here 🫂 anyway thanku and sjsjsksksks bye i guess 😭 #who knows maybe i'll enjoy it one day again and come back :') never know what the future holds 🫡

[leafeonb]

once again thinking of the armor timeline is both funny and sad but for now let's think of whats funny i think that there are probably rumors that x dungeon or place or something in the area is haunted by what looks like a cursed armor and then the armor listens to that story replying "damn that's crazy... we should never go there"

#lulu.txt #when it's in a town to collect information or just to hang out it wears different pieces of armor so its like #no one will know that's The Armor 💀 #hmmm idk how long the timeline for them is but it is long enough for them to not remember how they ended up line that (☹️) #dont worry i will make friends for the armor. in the current time they meet two siblings called may and belle 👍 but i need to #think about their characters more... bc both of them were actually from a separate oc story but then i was like hm the armor world is so #lonely. and i wasnt doing anything with those ocs they kind of were just sitting there as concepts #i also already said this before but i need to make a blacksmith oc that will be the armor #s longtime friend... idk if they would know the armor isnt human or not but after some years they would probably #joke like haha how come i have never seen you without the helmet! #fuck it. ocs tag #ocs tag

[no1ryomafan]

hate ever since I finished giant robo yesterday my train of thought hasn’t been a critical analysis of what I consumed despite acknowledging both the show’s strengths and weaknesses and instead going back to my Imagawa Armageddon drama conspiracy board and going “okay no way in fuck he didn’t have Kei as Genki planned after the fucking family drama plot line in giant robo being similar to what we got in arma and it’s likely that the team got away with this idea after he left because they might’ve been in production for ep 4 but had to rewrite it and the show after onwards to fit the new direction”

or in simpler terms my brain activates “how do I make this about getter robo”

#meg text #mecha rambles #getter robo #giant robo ova #I think I ranted about this on here before so I won’t rant about it in the tags again but GOD #it didn’t help I found out genya was voiced by gos va too (fucking seki is in everything ever) #I’m now slightly convinced the reason imagawa even made their hair green was to reference genya and ginrei #originally I thought he based at least gos hair off of one manga cover ishikawa did for the manga but this seems more likely #I never even seen anyone mention the fact genkis hair was always green- or the fact how his va was always keis #And given she also voiced ALLENBY prior I don’t think imagawa would wanna waste a talent like that in a child who hardly speaks #also just remembering how the show of giant robo we got was somehow the 6 part out of 7 and needs 5 other parts for context #and how the end teases the last part even if it still is conclusive it just as my friend put it “apart of a anime that doesn’t exist” #and people thought the moon war stuff was complicated 💀 (still nice to have the context but- at least it would just need to be ONE show) #Oh and I heard genya and ginrei were completely original characters he made so that’s how he could’ve gotten away with it #next to it being a reference #tldr will never know the full context of the arma staff drama but Im now convinced Kei as genki was always planned #and likely the show we would’ve gotten would only be different in tone the hayato shit being address and way way more convoluted