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peakyblindersxx · 3 years

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come home with me - finn shelby x reader

a/n: you have @michaelgreys to thank for this one (& the gif!!! check her out she's amazing). s5 finn cause god damn!!1 i honestly dont have much to say about this one other than it's definitely self indulgent and not even god can help me at this point. i'm working on p4 to whiskey buisness rn as well as some requests, thank you for all the sweet comments!!

love, abi xxx

my masterlist

prompt: finn hates you so much he might want to fuck you.

warnings: nsfw!! smut, pretty fluffy cause he's baby 🥺

Working for the Shelby Company wasn’t difficult, except for one thing: Finn Shelby. You were one of the many secretaries, in charge of conveying messages, filing papers, and many other important things, such as making sure the glass decanter of whiskey sitting on the bar cart in Tommy’s office was never empty. It wasn’t a very taxing job, but Finn went out of his way to get under your skin in every way he could. Maybe it was the fact that you wouldn’t back down, having a quick retort to anything close to disrespectful that he said to you. The other brothers never said a thing to intervene, Arthur even telling you he was glad you had a backbone.

“Finn’s a cocky thing, eh? Too cocky for his own good. A girl like you’ll put ‘im in his place,” he had slurred, while you collected the letters he’d asked you to mail.

“Dunno, Mr. Shelby,” you’d mused. “Seems like he’s got some sort of problem with me.”

“Don’t even bother with that, he’s just an arrogant fuck. Probably got some sort of crush on you an’ is too shy to do shit about it. You know, first time he fucked a whore, he said sorry,” Arthur grunted. You’d chalked up his admissions to the half empty bottle of whiskey that he was clutching and the light dusting of snow on his right nostril. Still, you couldn’t help but wonder if the looks Finn shot your way, though seemingly out of irritation, meant something more. You couldn’t lie, you’d thought about what it’d be like to feel the youngest Shelby brother’s bow-shaped lips on your neck, his hands on your waist. It couldn’t be true, you resolved; Arthur was just wasted and you were delusional.

Monday came, and Tommy had asked you to work in the betting shop for the next few weeks. “Make sure Finn’s not fucking up,” he had grunted, taking a long drag of his cigarette, clear blue eyes barely leaving the stacks of paper that littered his massive desk. Of course you’d agreed, but you were nervous. Something about it made your heart beat faster in your chest. You took a shot of whiskey before you left, hoping the dark liquor would help calm your nerves. Isaiah insisted on accompanying you, telling you there were too many people that didn’t like them around there and to make sure someone was always with you for the next few weeks. You were grateful for his presence, the jokes he cracked easing your mind as the two of you walked briskly along the cobblestone streets. It didn’t take long to get there, Isaiah holding the door open for you as the warm air inside the betting office washed over you. Finn turned to see who it was, a scowl tugging at the edges of his mouth once he saw you.

“Why the fuck is she here,” he drawled, sitting at his desk with his feet up, a half-finished cigarette dangling from his fingertips. As much as you hated to admit it, he looked fucking good, hair neatly combed back, smelling of expensive cologne in a pressed navy blue suit. He was tall, legs stretching across the desk as he sent a glare in your direction, you rolling your eyes in response.

“Tommy said,” Isaiah interjected, sensing the tension in the air. “He said you said you needed more help, or somethin’.”

“Fuckin’ christ,” Finn mumbled, taking a drag from his cigarette before putting it out on the crystal ashtray that sat on his desk, standing to grab a stack of books from one of the shelves behind him.

“Jesus, it’s like I’m the fucking plauge or something,” you retorted, Isaiah stifling his chuckle as he looked anywhere but at the two of you. Finn ignored you, instead setting the pile of books on his desk.

“Come look at this, before I change my mind,” he said, instead. You obliged, walking behind his desk to see what he was gesturing to as Isaiah excused himself, something about “gettin’ fucking plastered, mate!” Finn was easily a head taller than you, so he practically towered over you, engulfing you in a cloud of his intoxicating cologne as you stood so close to him that you could practically feel the heat emanating from his body.

“So, these are the bets, and those are the outcomes,” he explained, arm brushing against your body slightly as he pointed to the different columns written out in the log. To your chagrin, your skin prickled in response, your body unable to control itself. Yet, you pushed it down, not wanting to give Finn the satisfaction of knowing that you wanted him. God knows he’d hold it against you forever. What he was explaining was simple enough, and you were able to grasp it fairly quickly. He was all business, handing you the logs he needed you to double check, as you sank into the desk adjacent to his, pouring over the books and coming to him to confirm small corrections.

However, after a couple of drinks of whiskey (some of which you admittedly consumed), Finn started talking. Small things, like how irritating Tommy was or how much they’d made off a certain horse. He’d never opened up to you like this; it was always a snide remark that usually set off an argument, since the two of you were fairly hot-headed. This time, it was different. Finn was still looking at you, but with slightly rosy cheeks and a smile threatening to spread across his face every time you made a witty remark. This time, you liked the way he was looking at you.

***

Two thirds of a bottle later, you were both on the floor in front of the fire, laughing at something Finn had said. Admittedly, he had said it just to see you laugh. He liked when you laughed, he realized. It was much better than the irritated look on your face that he usually saw. In all honesty, it was probably his fault, he thought to himself. Maybe it was the whiskey talking, but he really wanted to see you smile for the rest of his life. You sat next to him, shoulders brushing as the two of you talked, your jacket long abandoned, revealing the flimsy straps of the black lace dress. You looked so fucking pretty, he couldn’t help himself.

“You’re fucking beautiful, you know that, right? Always wondered why you hung ‘round us lot, bunch of mean fuckers.” The words fell out of his mouth, hovering in the air between the two of you. You stared at him, slightly taken aback, but the liquor was doing the talking for both of you, it seemed.

“Look who’s fucking talking. Half the girls in Brum would gladly fuck you, even just for a night.”

Finn paused, lighting a cigarette and offering you a drag.“What about you?”

You accepted, taking a puff before passing it back. “What about me?”

He cracked a grin. “Would you fuck me?”

His bluntness took you aback, but you were too far gone to think properly. “Maybe,” you admitted, a coy smile playing at your lips. Finn’s eyes darkened, closing the distance between the two of you until his body was almost touching yours, the tension between you crackling like the fire just a few feet away.

“What about now?” he muttered, lips brushing ever so slightly against your neck, causing you to shiver. He noticed, his hands finding the curve of your hips, searing through your dress. You couldn’t help but tilt your neck back slightly, a gasp leaving your lips as Finn pressed an open-mouthed kiss to your skin.

“Finn,” you moaned quietly, the smile on his lips growing wider as his hands fiddled with the hem of your dress, fingertips sliding underneath to grip lightly at the soft skin of your thighs. “Fuckin’ do something already, christ.”

Finn grinned. “Always got a fuckin’ mouth on you, eh? You’re lucky I find that attractive,” he teased. You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could, his fingers found your silk panties, pushing them to the side to rub lightly against your clit, causing you to jolt in pleasure. You were already wet, to Finn’s satisfaction, and he had no trouble pushing a finger inside of you. The moans that were leaving your mouth were sinful, and he savored each one, watching the way you squirmed when he added another, curling them inside of you.

“Look so goddamn pretty, stuffed full of my fingers,” he crooned, sending your eyes rolling back in your head, eyelashes fluttering.

“Finn, please,” you whined, his nimble fingers deftly unzipping your dress and sliding it off, leaving you in your black silk bra and panties. Finn paused, taking a second to drink you in before pressing his lips to yours. They were softer than you could have imagined, hands gripping at your waist as he tugged at your bottom lip for access. You let him in, melting at his touch like butter.

“Want you inside me,” you mumbled against his lips, causing his muscles to stiffen as he sprang into action, pulling you on top of him, lining his already hard cock up with you. He was big, and if you weren’t already so ready for him, you might have been a little nervous. He slowly pushed inside of you, helping you sink down on top of him with one hand as he swore under his breath, using his other hand to unhook your bra, throwing it to the side and exposing your breasts to the cool air, nipples hardening at his touch.

“Fuckin’ gorgeous,” Finn growled, unable to resist from taking one of them into his mouth, rolling it between his teeth. The sound you made in response was pathetic, but fuck if it wasn’t fueling his appetite for you. He couldn’t help but push up into you, a tight grip on your hipbones, holding you up as he rammed into you, cock pressing up against your g-spot, sending your vision spinning.

“Fuck, Finn, m’gonna cum,” you cried, eyes sqeezed shut, overwhelmed by the sheer amount of pleasure he was giving you. Finn grunted, somehow increasing his pace, pressing kisses to wherever he could.

“Go ahead darlin’, want you to cum all over my cock,” he cajoled, the words sending waves of pleasure through you. You couldn’t help but follow his orders, colors flickering across your eyesight. The image of you cumming just for him sent Finn over the edge, groaning your name as he finished inside of you, dripping down the inside of your thighs. You looked so fucking angelic in the firelight, he had the sudden urge to take care of you.

“Y’alright?” He asked, reaching for a rag to clean you up. You nodded, smiling softly down at him as he couldn’t help but press a kiss to your hipbone. He looked up at you, eyes full of adoration.

“Come home with me?” Finn murmured, hands fidgeting.

“Yeah,” you replied, a glow tinging your cheeks as you looked at him the same. “Let’s go home.”

#finn shelby imagine #finn shelby smut #peaky blinders imagine #finn shelby x reader #peaky blinders smut #peaky blinders x reader #finn shelby x y/n

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jannwrites · 3 years

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ask meme: GROUPCHAT EDITION.

part i don’t even fucking know anymore

[TEXT]: tony the tiger tops

[TEXT]: choose NOT to see jesus !!

[TEXT]: god if i wanted to be called slurs i’d just go to hurlock

[TEXT]: drugs, a safer alternative to dabbling with the occult

[TEXT]: stay ignorant to own the libs

[TEXT]: the people Needed to know you could fuck the android

[TEXT]: we are all mothman kin here in the bone zone

[TEXT]: stayhydrayed

[TEXT]: I WAS RUNNIN ON VODKA SPRITE AND TORTELLINI

[TEXT]: geoff beesüs.........

[TEXT]: pov: ur a small dog hunting ronald reagan for sport

[TEXT]: i'm about to beat up a senior citizen

[TEXT]: going to therapy: cool. old people: fuck off.

[TEXT]: we all kin the party mouse in the bone zone

[TEXT]: he is every awkward gangly teenage boy’s fursona

[TEXT]: see I'm fuckin right. this man will never watch doctor who because he has too much anime to watch.

[TEXT]: we are all just plants with complicated emotions

[TEXT]: atitpl (assigned trans in the parking lot)

[TEXT]: i purchased a new gender at the walmart

[TEXT]: literally an hour and a half ago i thought i was gonna crawl into bed but now i'm caffeinated and enraged for multiple reasons

[TEXT]: cant talk rn, im doin hot girl shit [proceeds to lick the tiles]

[TEXT]: we are all god's personal muppets, waiting to be vored

[TEXT]: I CAN ONLY HANDLE SO MUCH VORE-RELATED TOMFOOLERY AT ONCE

[TEXT]: DONT TALK TO ME ABOUT FUCKING VORE UNTIL IVE VORED THOSE FUCKING HAMS

[TEXT]: humiliate the left, guillotine daddy bezos

[TEXT]: guillotine ceos to own the libs

[TEXT]: his ass is juicy and has ruined lives

[TEXT]: one foot in the grave and the other in an ice skate

[TEXT]: are we not all, at our core, crunchy little raviolis

[TEXT]: we are All the man in the mirror

[TEXT]: i cant have common sense AND a fat ass thats just not how it works

[TEXT]: i’ve got a fat ass and i will use it for evil

[TEXT]: i think crowley would kin [name]

[TEXT]: thanks now i'm gonna be thinking about his big ass mouth for the rest of the night

[TEXT]: bernie sanders saying "the entire nation of ireland makes my dick soft"

[TEXT]: "piss? stored in the balls. semen? stored in the neck."

[TEXT]: livin with ur piss rice (and piss rice related crimes)

[TEXT]: mustard crimes are a misdemeanor, piss rice crimes are a felony

[TEXT]: thank u for my sexy muppet rights

[TEXT]: awab (assigned wolverine at birth)

[TEXT]: every day i log into twitter and i simp for fucking vampires

[TEXT]: live ur best muppet gas station cashier life

[TEXT]: assigned rancid at birth

[TEXT]: STOP SCREAMING AT THE FRIDGE IT WONT FUCK YOU

[TEXT]: i am. in love with a cowboy.

[TEXT]: moose hunts you for sport [ASMR] (deep sea edition)

[TEXT]: mothman has done nothing wrong ever and moose have done many things wrong

[TEXT]: anti-moose propaganda in the group chat

#rp meme #rp ask meme #text starters #rp text starters #rp text meme #ask meme #these groupchat memes just grow exponentially more stupid with each one i post #* mine.#meme: text.

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silenceismychoir · 4 years

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50 questions you've never been asked before

thank you so much for tagging me @silverkasienka and @pomegranatecurses ♡

1. what is the colour of your hair brush? black

2. name of a food you never eat? far too many lmao im incredibly fussy

3. are you typically too warm or too cold? too warm

4. what were you doing 45 minutes ago? just gave up writing an essay after writing one line but thankfully the class rep got the due date extended to monday and not tomorrow so i can forget about it for a while.

5. what’s your favourite candy bar? i love all so much and my fave changes from day to day lmao but rn my faves are top deck and chocolate log (pretty sure these candy bars arent available everywhere but yeah they're amazing)

6. have you ever been to a professional sports event? nope, i was so close to going to one of the cricket test matches in december/january but Life happened lmao

7. what is the last thing you said out loud? i think i said something about how amazing my president is lol

8. what is your favourite ice cream? chocolate

9. what is the last thing you had to drink? dalgona coffee (i can't stop making this these days)

10. do you like your wallet? i guess so lmao

11. what was the last thing you ate? chips

12. did you buy any new clothes last week? nope

13. last sporting event you watched? hmm...the womens t20 wc final? i dont remember anything after that (also damn, that's so long ago adgdkskal)

14. what’s your favourite flavour of popcorn? sweet popcorn or salted popcorn, i cant choose

15. who was the last person you sent a message to? a friend

16. ever go camping? nope, dont think i want to either

17. do you take vitamins? nope

18. do you go to church every sunday? nope, im not christian so that would be kinda strange if i did...

19. do you have a tan? nope, im almost always indoors (quarantine or not lmao)

20. do you prefer chinese food or pizza? i dont eat a lot of chinese bc most chinese restaurants arent halal here so i guess pizza

21. do you drink soda with a straw? dont drink soda anymore

22. what colour socks do you wear? any colour?

23. do you ever drive above the speed limit? do i ever drive? no.

24. what terrifies you? many things. the future. heights. snakes. looking back at my life with regret. many things.

25. look to your left what do you see? the wall

26. what chore do you hate? the dishes. i dont know how that shit is therapeutic.

27. what do you think of when you hear an australian accent? 5 seconds of summah / the aussie cricket team.

28. what’s your favourite soda? dont have one

29. do you go into fast food places or drive thru? usually fast food places

30. who was the last person you talked to? my sister

31. favourite cut of beef? i dont have one lol. dont really like beef either.

32. last song you listened to? never seen the rain - tones and i

33. last book you read? i was reading No Friend But The Mountains by Behrouz Boochani in december last year but i didnt finish it. the last book i read before that was Educated by Tara Westover

34. can you say the alphabet backwards? i thought i could but i tried now and nope i cant lol

35. how do you like your coffee? black, no sugar.

36. favourite pair of shoes? my boots

37. the time you normally go to bed? 11pm or later

38. the time you normally wake up? depends, it can range from 4am-6am some days and 1pm if i dont have to go to uni

39. what do you prefer sunrise or sunsets? sunsets

40. how many blankets are on your bed? 1 duvet

41. describe your kitchen plates? we have all sorts lmao from plain white to plates with floral patterns on the edges idk im not gonna describe every plate we have lmao

42. do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? nope

43. do you play cards? not really

44. what colour is your car? dont have a car

45. can you change a tire? nope

46. your favourite province? this is ... an odd question lmao ... the province i live in? im not american so i could say Gdksodhwk province and yall would have to accept that what im saying is real and true

47. favourite job you’ve had? havent had a job

48. how did you get your biggest scar? my dad was fixing some things around the house and i found a saw that he left lying around and basically cut myself on it on the lateral, distal aspect of my right arm.

49. favourite day of the week? i dont have one?

50. what did you do today that made someone happy? i complimented my sister on the pasta she made which i guess made her happy? she seemed happy?

im gonna tag @talksopretty @calum-uncrowned @wastethen8 @themightyhemmings @myloverboyash @heartbreakgirlisagoodsongcalum @calumhoodaf - only if you want to lovelies!

#tag game #this was fun lolol!

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mickadamz · 4 years

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Okay, you're my go-to for Supernatural stuff, and I'm in need of some hurt/comfort destiel. do you have any fics you can recommend?

im ur go to........

OK but fr i'll hook u up bro... im probably missing a few thins bc i sometimes read while logged out and i lose shit all the time but here r the best ones i have rn.. i hope they're sufficient LMAO

semi canon compliant:

I'm Extremely Old, I Think I'm Entitled by sandean_cas is short and a little funny and not rly hurt/comfort-y until the very end but i like it

Counting Every Blessing by tale_to_tell fucked me up but its RLY good. it's a case fic and boy it hurt but its worth it

All the Poor and Powerless, also by tale_to_tell is another OUCH that HURTS. they have an entire series of fics like this but all the ones in the collection end w/ a happy ending otherwise i wouldnt be giving you this

EDIT: I FORGOT THIS but the cost of a thing ALSO by our dearest wanderingcas had me so fucked up. loved it. i cant remember what season it was based around but i think it's an alternate season 9 au.

AU:

if u have a lot of time and patience, Stay With Me, Sweetheart by @a-mandala-rose . the tags say it all but quick disclaimer, it's a(n almost) painfully long slowburn edit: it's finally completed.... god bless

la haniste by @wanderingcas is another multi chapter slowburn + mysterious backstory kinda fic and im really enjoying this one so far. it is updating weekly tho so its not done yet but again, if u have patience, read it.

also written by Tumblr User Sam WanderingCas is Passing Ships but ive never read it myself so i cant say anything other than she recommended it herself (its true check the notes)

#fic rec #destiel

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kumoriyami-xiuzhen · 5 years

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Hakuoki Short Story: Saito-san’s Days of Practice

First translation posts of the month (1 of 2 for translations +1 update [that one will not be tagged with hakuoki]), so please support me if you can either on ko-fi (https://ko-fi.com/V7V2W0HO) or through paypal (paypal.me/KumoriYami )…. also let me know if you have any hakuoki drama cds that you’d be willing to share that are on my looking for list since i don’t have the audio for those…..

In regards to this translation, I honestly don’t know where this short story came from, but I’ve assumed that it showed up in one of the Dengeki or B-log magazines as they, in the past, have had other various Hakuoki short stories in them....I think? If anyone has information in regards to this, I’d appreciate it to put that down here....

Aside from Saito’s story, I’ve only been able to find Chinese translations for Souji and Heisuke for these (don’t have a timeline on those right now, cuz holy shit these feel extreeeemely long. seriously!).... and have no intention of looking for the others at the moment (i gave up after more than an hour). If anyone does happen to find the others in Chinese... feel free to send them my way since I will add those to my list of torturous translations (i don’t wanna update my lookout list rn + plus I don’t want to add these to that list without knowing where these come from).

Anyway, this story is told from Chizuru’s point of view, also the image is not mine.

Enjoy~<3

Hakuoki Short Story - Saito-san’s Days of Practice

Translation by KumoriYami

The silence of the temple was disturbed by the sound of Saito-san slicing the air with a wooden sword. He repeated his movements smoothly, from top to bottom, [then] from left to right.

During this quiet morning, after hearing the sound of sword practice in the temple as I was heading to the kitchen to prepare breakfast, I couldn't help but stop.

"Ah......Saito-san?"

“Yukimura, today you woke up early? Are you going to prepare breakfast?”

"Yes, Saito-san, you are also up early."

Before my arrival, Saito-san had been practising for a while, [and] his cheeks were sweaty. I handed him the handkerchief I had with me to him, tilting my head as I asked:

“Why are you practising so early? What's the matter? [alt: Is there anything going on/something wrong?]”

“Yes, I was thinking about something.”

“Thinking about something?”

“A few days ago, vice-commander asked me to train some of the new recruits..... but I don't know what training arrangements should be made.

Saito-san frowned slightly and continued to speak.

From his words, it sounded as if the new warriors who joined [the Shinsengumi] had good swordsmanship.

“Sword skills can be ordinarily improved through normal training, but mental capabilities are different to improve, [and/but I] don't know of any good methods to improve them.”

"A good method...."

Early morning birds chirping echoed in my ears, I looked over the Nishi Honwanji temple courtyard together with Saito-san thinking of his concerns.

After thinking for a moment, I clasped my hands together and spoke: "Ah, I have heard that the monks of Nishi Honwanji usually sit in meditation to improve their minds.

"Indeed, meditation can really improve/hone a person's mind. However, merely siting in meditation does not seem adequate, and something else must be done."

------------

Regardless of if it's plants [says trees] or animals, all living things will hide themselves until spring as it was winter

The wind blowing off the river wasn't just cold, but painful. Just breathing made my throat feel frozen.

——Even so, today Saito-san was only wearing a single strip of cloth [fundoshi... probably?], tightly holding his arm(s) [probably: tightly crossing his arms], quietly looking down towards the torrential waterfall before us.

"Sai-saito-san, you truly want to sit underneath that waterfall?

Yes, since ancient times to the present, when it comes to mediation, it's best to use a waterfall.

"But, the weather is so cold, you might die accidentally...."

If there is no risk to one's life, then it will not be training.

Saito-san nodded seriously, then went towards the cold river. The moment his toe touched the water, Saito-san shook violently. I was absolutely not imagining it.

Saito-san continued his movements, obviously stiffly because of the cold.

I worriedly called out to him:

"Saito-san, d-don't do this....."

"It's okay, do not worry."

"But......"

"Do not worry."

Saito-san whispered to himself, then showed no hesitation as he put one foot into the water.

He used his frozen legs to wade through the river and after, moved underneath the waterfall without hesitation.

"If, if only one's mind [thinks it] is cold, [then] even fire can be [thought of as] cold...... [the tl i saw had the word “cold” in place of where I put in “fire”, and the 2nd 'cold’ that I wrote as “fire/hot,” so I switched these around]

Saito-san endured waterfall falling down on his head, softly/gently [slowly] closing his eyes.

「……」

“No, no [don't do this] Saito-san! Now that you've meditated, hurry up and get out, or you really will catch a cold."

「……」

"......Saito-san?"

「……」

"Saito-san? Saito-san——" ------------

"Therefore/as a result/so, in order to improve one's willpower/mind, not only meditation, but also doing that beneath a waterfall [will help]?

"That....the last part is too dangerous..."

"It was only because the water was so cool and comfortable, that I almost fell asleep.”

Almost froze to death—— though that could not be said, I was once again made aware of the present.

"Now that it is no longer winter, it is now longer possible to ind a cold waterfall."

"Yes. other methods to practice need to be thought of."

What other ways were there? We fell into deep contemplation again.

The time, the first who thought [of something] was Saito-san.

"It would better to go into the mountains to live in seclusion, this is also [a] basic [form of] training."

------------

Through the roof made/built of tree leaves and branches, the familiar sunlight, only the sound of birds from the quiet mountain roads/paths, shrouded [the area] with a tranquil/quiet atmosphere.

[Alt (since my ^ tl for this was more literal): The sunlight passing through the roof made of tree leaves and branches and the sound of birds chirping on the mountain paths created a tranquil atmosphere.][also im guessing they built a shelter?]

[We have] Been living in seclusion in the mountains for [a few] days [now].

Saito-san and I were living(/surviving) in the mountains by picking wild vegetables, and fishing to eat.

"......[I] Really didn't think/expect that it would be so quiet."

"Yes..... Saito-san, is this also a form of practise/training?

"In a sense, there is no type of training stricter/more rigourous than this, than/with just the two of us living secluded in the mountains."

"Eh?"

I couldn't help but make a sound as I looked at Saito-san, however I didn't understand why he looked away.

Then while not looking at me, whispered.

"I mean, there is nothing here, I don't know if you're bored being together with me......"

"There is no such problem, I like being together with Saito-san."

"Is, is that so? That's good... Well, actually, me being together with you also...." [alt: being together with you, I also...]

Just now [he] said——

Saito-san's voice was muffled by another noise, [one] that suddenly [started] coming from the rustling of the nearby bushes.

The sounds coming from the bushes got louder and louder, until finally, it turned into the low roar of a wild beast.

I immediately assumed a defensive position, [and] at this moment, I saw a giant beast with sharp claws appear.

"Sai-saito-san, there's a bear! Quick, run away/get out of here!"

I hurriedly pulled at Saito-san's sleeves, trying to pull him so that we could escape together, but I don't know why he wanted to continue what he was saying to me, and did not move.

「……」

It absolutely wasn't because of fear that he refused to budge. Because he was glaring straight at the bear with a terrible look.

"Yukimura, retreat."

"Are-are you going to fight it? You might not be a bear's opponent...."

"Encountering these type of circumstances should be avoided, [alt?: Coming across /having such an opportunity is rare,/This situation was supposed to be a retreat/ I was supposed to be getting away from these types of situations,] but I am suddenly, no, I am very angry."

[^ if you can’t tell, i had looots of difficulties with the first half of this, lol. so I just put down all my interpretations... though I'd assume it's probably more along the lines of: Having such an opportunity (with you) is rare, so I am suddenly...]

Saito-san looked straight at the bear with a sharp gaze and put his left hand on his katana's hilt, emitting killing intent/a murderous aura, as if the bear was a punching bag.

"Living in seclusion in the wilderness requires fighting a bear——Prepare to die, bear." [may say: To live (in seclusion) in the mountain wilderness is to fight a bear/means fighting a bear]

------------

".....Well, we can discuss about how else to hone/improve one's mind/willpower. Will it/should it need to involve fighting bears?

Ordinary humans should not be able to defeat bears, but Saito-san is not without the possibility of winning. With these types of thoughts, I lowered my head.

"Disregarding minor details, we cannot be away from headquarters for long, [and] living in seclusion in the mountains is not realistic.”

"Yes, to hone your mind/will, you shouldn't need to go living in seclusion in the mountains."

Once again, our thoughts were disrupted, [and] we sighed, together looking towards the sky again.

"[This is] Really difficult. Is there an effective training method that doesn't require [a lot of] time?"

Thinking about this general idea, I thought:

"Nn.....what about fasting? A few days ago, Heisuke-kun, Harada-san, [and] Nagakura-san didn't eat anything for the entire day, [and were] so hungry that they cried."

"Fasting? This sounds worthwhile, though I do not know its effectiveness."

After hearing this, I suddenly remembered, this talk about eating——

"Ah, that's right! I need to go make breakfast!"

“Sorry, I have kept you for so long. What is for breakfast today?"

"Turnip soup, [and] Kyoto-styled cooked vegetables [lit: Kyoto cooked vegetables]. Although it's yesterday's leftovers, the taste is very rich and is very delicious."

Ghrgh....

Saito-san responded to what I said with his stomach, which sounded like the stomach of a hungry animal.

"........It appears that my training is insufficient, [and that] I must correct what I said as fasting appears to be an effective form of practice/training."

Saito-san turned his head and blushed because of his stomach's gurgling.

I responded with a smile and looked away.

"Breakfast will be ready soon, please wait a moment."

"Today I'll help you cook, as thanks to you for speaking with me."

"Ah......okay, I'll be troubling you Saito-san!"

Saito-san spoke as he quickly walked forward, and I hurried to catch up.

the end

--------

The title of this might actually be Day of Practice instead of plural days... but I left it at days since I think it made more sense.... Unfortunately, identifying if something is either singular or plural in Chinese isn’t the easiest thing to do unless there’s more context.... and titles certainly lack that. Nouns without context... it’s like they’re all like the word ‘moose’ (only English comparison I can think of off the top of my head atm...). It’s both singular and plural and without further information, it’s impossible to figure out if one moose is being talked about or multiple moose....

^I only wrote this blurb cuz i spent a good 5 min pondering about what the title should be lol. Using day sounds better, and I’m kinda particular about how the way things both look and sound, but days did make more sense.....

^^i’m kinda feeling random rn... and i’ve probably had too much sugar just now. tired too. also i don’t have a habit of writing translation notes like this nor do i really intend to do so notes like this again in the future... though perhaps again when im felt like i’ve had too much sugar? lol w/e...

>_<

nother post will be up shortly. tsukikage countdown.

#Hakuoki #Hakuouki #Saito Hajime #Hakuoki Other Translation #Hakuoki Short Story Translation #Yukimura Chizuru

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kuladia-a · 4 years

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this is really long and heavy um tw for a lot of things mainly mental illness and disability and related stuff and honestly its not necessary at all to read im just mostly saying it to make sense of things for my personal benefit

the important take away is that im going to be archiving this blog and i wanted to say thank you to everyone who’s written with me here even though i havent written or posted very much here ksdjlf

for months i have just been getting more and more frustrated with myself and my writing, it feels like the things i write don’t make sense and i’m always unsatisfied i can never manage to live up to my own expectations?? i used to write kinda good i think at least i wasnt always so unhappy with what i produced but every time i log on here and try to draft or respond to something it’s jsut so frustrating and embarrassing because it is so Bad

and tbh its been following a self dissatisfaction ive been having for months, in general i suck at articulating and talking and being clear. i dont really know how to start interactions on this blog or irl and i am so awkward and make a fool out of myself every time i try to reach out to people, and so much stuff has been going on in my personal life that has been really stressing me out and making everything worse

and it’s a bit dumb of me to unload here but i don’t have anyone really i think i can talk to about stuff like this and i wont be coming back on here so idk. fuck it i guess. it’s weird bc the rpc is where ive made a lot of friends despite how hard it is for me to make friends. and i’ve made a lot of good ones and i love them all so much and im super grateful for those moments where i feel successful like im actually doing things right and accepted and welcomed by other ppl. but i also have a lot of setbacks and rn ive just sort of hit that point where i dont think its even worth trying anymore.

i dont get anything i dont get starting conversations or continuing them or making friends or understanding when someone is your friend or just being polite or how much to say about something before it gets annoying nd its useless to think abt but i really hate being autistic i just wish that i was normal. ive tried a lot of stuff recently like dumb stuff like herbal supplements and shit just cuz i rly rly wanna change and i kinda was like let me at least exhaust all my options but . well like obviously those dont work and like. i guess it is what it is thats what this disorder does it ruins your ability to connect with other people. i cant really change my not understanding social cues or. all the annoying stuff i do and dont even realize til people point it out

talking to people and sharing things i think and things i’ve done and putting myself out there feels so paralyzing. and i have been trying to act like everything is fine bc i thought maybe if i did things would work themselves out and be fine but that isn’t happening. living itself just kinda feels like its crushing me at this point like it’s kind of a lot of constant pain and i just. need one less source of humiliation i think.

so like yeah long story short im not going to be on this blog anymore. i might log on every now and again jsut bc i like reading my mutuals writing i love all the stuff you come up with and to see it you are all incredible writers and storytellers. but im not posting or roleplaying anymore. if u have my discord we can still talk if u want but im not gonna be doing anything here

#negative tw #ooc

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cromslowglogbob · 4 years

Text

Thank you for the lovely chat, @kind-of-obsesive

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say STAND WITH HONG KONG AGAINST THE CCP!

You both like harry potter.

You: hey

Stranger: hello

Stranger: whats up?

You: im listening to 80s metal

You: chattin with someone on omegle

You: oh wait

You: you>

You: you?

You: what up wit u

Stranger: laying in bed pertending to be alseep,

You: ah hidin from the parentals?

Stranger: talking to strangers

You: whoa same

Stranger: why of course what else would i be dping

You: nice

You: you like homestuck?

Stranger: i dont know anything about it sorry

You: oh ok

Stranger: you like harry potter?

You: yes thats why it says "You both like harry potter." at the top of the page

You: so yes

You: what house?

Stranger: hufflepuff, you?

You: slytherin

You: hold up i have, on my phone a gc of just slyths and puffs and claws

You: this is interesting

You: and i am chatting w them rn

You: many puffs surround me

Stranger: sounds like an awesome group chat

You: it is

Stranger: and yes we are many

You: its me and a bunch of pan and bi girls

You: one of them is married to all the others

You: question

Stranger: yes

You: do you know what this quote is from:

You: "HUFFLEUFFS ARE PARTICULARLY GOOD FINDERS"

Stranger: harry potter? idk

You: It is from a hp parody musical called A Very Potter Musical

You: its hilarious and you can watch it for free on yt

You: its 1 hour

Stranger: ohhhhh ive been meaning to watch that, its by starkid or something

You: YES! do you know what homestuck is

Stranger: nope am very uncultured

You: do you like reading?

Stranger: yup!

Stranger: do you?

You: yes

You: are you up for reading a 8129 page webcomic with 815,000 words

You: if so i would suggest homestuck

Stranger: i mean comics arent tipically what i read but ill give it a shot

You: nice

You: it has images and like. long blocks of text sometimes

You: most of the words are in the form of chatlogs

You: like this one

Stranger: thats good i typically only read chunks of text, and chat logs are always fun to read

You: ni8ce

You: nice

You: what time is it for you rn

Stranger: 23:31

You: same

You: what country do you live in

Stranger: canada, you?

You: america

You: yall have provinces right?

Stranger: and territories

You: ah yes

Stranger: and you guys have states

You: indeed we do

You: and some territories i believe

You: theyre like probation states p much

Stranger: nice, our territories will always be territories cause its to much work to change them

You: haha

Stranger: :P

You: are you a minor

You: i am

Stranger: as am i, young one

You: hell ye

You: im 13, you?

Stranger: 17 you little baby, imma adopt you

You: i,,,dont think thats legal

You: anyway if ur nice sure ill take it

Stranger: probably not but the rest of my children enjoy it

You: ah

Stranger: and i think im pretty nice

You: well come on down to Massachusetts and adopt me then

Stranger: come on up to ontario and join the cult

You: whee the name of my state was taken from the name of a tribe that white pilgrims pushed off their land where did the name Ontario come from

You: oh whats ur gender

Stranger: idk, its not really discused where the provonce names come from, and female

You: ok liy

You: lit

Stranger: god you type fast, im impressed

You: thank you very much

You: i learned from type to learn 4 when I was in 4th grade

You: but i didn't learn very well so there are a lot of typos sometimes

Stranger: oh i taught myself to type so theres lots normally

You: oh lit

You: do you like percy jackson?

Stranger: ive senn the movies and i liked those

You: oh shit

You: oh no

You: crap

Stranger: what?

You: i have to try v hard to not click the "stop" button

You: bc the movies

You: were not good, from the frame of reference from the books

You: but

You: opinions valid

Stranger: the movies are never as good i just cant get my hands on the books

You: oh thats sad

Stranger: legally at least

You: ah

You: have you read Ready Player One?

Stranger: noppe havent even seen the movie and for that i am sad

You: ah

You: well

You: if ur gonna watch the movie and want to like it, don't read the book

You: they are very different

Stranger: i live a sad life and will probably end up only seeing the movie

You: oh well

Stranger: blep

You: blep

You: do you have tumblr

Stranger: yes i do

You: niiccce

You: do you follow biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

Stranger: hell yah i do

Stranger: do you?

You: oh fuck yes

You: so im guessing you're not on the hipster side of tumblr\

Stranger: im rarely on tumblr, mostly on the fandom shit

You: if you wanna follow me, my account is frogtryinghisbest

You: i shall follow you back

Stranger: mine is kind-of-obsessive

You: nic

You: nice

You: boom

You: followed

Stranger: same here, also onl y two posts down and i already love your account

You: thank you

Stranger: i just forgot how to form a sentence

You: oof

Stranger has disconnected.

#omegle #omegle conversations #percy jackson #pjo #fun #harry potter

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shurisneakers · 6 years

Text

espresso [6]

Summary: In which your best friend’s brother begins to set you up on dates when you mention that you haven’t been in a relationship in years, but things don’t go as expected.

Warning: swearing, near panic attacks, angst (?)

A/N: this is my entry for the exuberant @odinhson‘s writing challenge thank you to @samingtonwilson for beta-ing this for me

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous part- Part 5 || Espresso Masterlist

Becca: binch

Becca: if i don’t get my nourishment i will Wilt and Die

Becca: if i get out of this bed rn i will literally Cry

Becca: pls get me a coffee kind sir,,, i will be gr8ful

You: um

You: i’ll get it later ok lov u

Becca: wtf why

You: im going to meet fucky at the library

You: *bucky

Becca: youre going to meet my brother again?

You: yes he said he was studying there anyway so I could go meet him there

You: why

Becca: nothing it’s just

You: it’s just?

Becca: nvm it’s nothing go see that smelly bitch biscuit

Becca: but get me the drugs when u come back

_____________

The library was fairly populated for seven in the morning. And, though everyone looked like they could use at least a week’s worth of sleep, they trudged on.

Walking through the aisles, you let your fingers run over the spines of every book, relishing in the feel of their old leather under your touch. It didn’t take log before you found Bucky in the classics section, his back leaning against one of the bookshelves as he scanned the ones in front of him.

“Looking for something specific?” you asked quietly, making him snap his head towards you. He gave you a tired smile before reverting to his original state.

“The Catcher in the Rye. I wanted to borrow it again,” he sounded distant, like his mind was preoccupied.

“Again? You’ve read it more than once?”

“Three times,” he answered, eyes lighting up as he reached forward and grabbed an old, worn out book with a tearing paper cover. His fingers dusted it gently before he opened to the last page, his eyes skimming over the words.

“It’s your favourite book?”

“I wouldn’t say it’s my favourite book, to be honest.” He flipped it, examining the cover from back to front. “Just the most memorable one. It sorta stuck with me throughout.”

“Why?” you asked curiously, watching as he flipped through the pages, seemingly searching for something within the lines.

“Don’t ask, it’s just gonna come off as pretentious as shit,” he chuckled, shking his head bemusedly, but you could detect a hint of something else behind his words. Bucky loved writing. He loved words. This book obviously meant a lot to him.

“I don’t know who hurt you Bucky Barnes, but I’d sure as fuck want to know why you love that book so much.” You heard a hush on the other side of the bookshelf, making you peep through the shelves only to catch the disapproving glare of the librarian who apparently caught you using unparliamentarily language.

“No one’s hurt me, it’s just-“ he paused to scratch the back of his neck awkwardly, letting his hand linger there. “I didn’t think anybody would care.”

“Oh.” You nudged his foot with yours, making him look at you in surprise. “Well, I care, so go ahead.”

He eyes never left yours and you could see a faint blush spread across his cheeks. Cute ass motherfucker.

Wait-

“Um, I guess it’s kinda because– the thing is– see, I–“ his mouth was moving at a speed much swifter than his brain, you could see it. It was like he had so much to say, almost too much. You gave him an encouraging smile as he took a deep breath to calm himself down before beginning again.

“I’ve read it three times. Every single time it means something different to me, you know? It’s like the words are familiar but everything’s changed,” he tried to convey what he was thinking, but it was clearly something hard to talk about because Bucky rarely ever ran out of words.

“‘Don’t ever tell anyone anything, if you do you start missing everybody.’,” he recited from memory finally showing you the page he stopped on. You shuffled closer to him, leaning on his shoulder to get a better look at the book in his hand. “It’s really hard for me to let others in. Everything becomes too intimate and when they decide to pack up and leave because they can’t handle my shit, it just—it hurts. It’s one of my favorite quotes.”

“It’s beautiful,” you said softly, as he looked at you for a few seconds in silence, not making an attempt to say anything.

“Right, so-“ he cleared his throat, pulling away to put the book back where it belonged. “His name’s Loki. He’s slightly difficult at first, but all he needs is just a little love and attention and he’s good to go.”

“Are we talking about a succulent or a person?” You remained where you were, feeling strangely lightheaded. Bucky glanced at the big clock overhead before returning to you.

“You’ll see.” He winked, shifting from one foot to another. “Now go! I have an hour to spend with calculus and you are going to be late for your first class.”

“You got a shift at the coffee shop today? I could come see you after,” you asked, facing him while walking backwards, your feet moving automatically.

“Not tonight, fam. I’m busy,” he said, looking down just for a second.

“Whatcha up to, barista boy? You got a hot date?” you teased him lightly, shoving your fists into your pockets, delaying your exit.

“I do, actually,” he fired back, making you freeze in your tracks.

“You’re going on a date?” you asked incredulously, your eyebrows shooting up in surprise.

“Yeah. Met an old friend of mine last week and we’re going out tonight.” He shrugged, giving you a half smile.

“Oh shits.” Well, that was new. It had been ages since Bucky had gone out with someone. “Use protection, ya nasty. Don’t want any mini versions of you running around.”

“Yeah, totally. We’re gonna go grab something to eat and fuck behind the church in my pickup truck.” He rolled his eyes, laughing to himself as you snorted.

“You’ve always been a huge part of the Jesus fandom,” you called out, grimacing when you heard the librarian hiss a ‘Quiet!’ at you again.

“Have fun, James. I’ll catch you later.” You shoved your hands further into your pockets, turning around and jogging out before he could get another word in.

_____________

You didn’t expect the goth version of Sabrina the Teenage Witch at the entrance of your building that evening, sporting a look of disdain with a hint of boredom, gracefully covered up with a smile. He was dressed to the nines in all black, which matched his dark hair and starkly contrasted his fair, almost too pale skin.

“You’re Y/N, I presume?” you could hear the remnants of an accent that wasn’t common to your area. He sounded tired but it looked like he was making an effort, so you weren’t completely put off.

You nodded, giving him a small smile. “Loki, right?”

“That’s me. Did James tell you where we’re going tonight?”

“Bucky doesn’t take the effort to tell me anything useful, so I’m pretty uninformed.” You followed him as he walked towards the gate of the compound, his fingers toying with the hem of his sweatshirt.

“That’s weird because I swear he asked me for everything ranging from my birth certificate to my social security number. He wouldn’t even give me your dorm address without it,” he said drily, his smile actually making him look really nice.

“Oh, wow.”

“Yeah, so there’s that carnival or a fair or something that’s come up. I figured we could go check it out.” He gestured to his car.

“Sounds fun.” You offered him a helpful smile, accepting his invitation without much hesitation. Maybe a distraction was exactly what you needed.

_____________

The whole fair was illuminated with lights from the different stalls and you could smell the calories in the air as kids ran around with cotton candy and popcorn and funnel cakes. The ratting of the roller coaster tracks and peals of laughter subconsciously made your heart lift and a grin settled on your face.

“What do you want to do first?” you asked loudly, trying to speak over the crowd.

“I don’t know. It’s so noisy. I wish everyone would just shut up.” He scrunched up his nose in disdain, leaving you to stare at him.

“How about grabbing something to eat first? I’m starving,” you suggested, earning a nod from him as you both made your way down to where most of the food stalls were.

Churros, funnel cake, caramel apples, popcorn and just about everything deep fried was put on display and it smelled pretty fucking great.

“D’you want to try out the hypertension or diabetes on a stick?” you laughed, eyeing everything separately.

“Uh—“ he paused, flinching. “I think I’m good.”

“Not even cotton candy?”

“Definitely not.” He shook his head, eyebrows crinkled in disgust.

“Well, okay, man.” You shrugged, not letting his preferences stop you from going ahead and buying the first thing that caught your eye and had your mouth watering.

He followed you silently through the entire process, only passing an occasional comment on how greasy it was or how unhealthy it was. You took it as a personal challenge to count how many times he nearly gagged.

“Rides or stalls?” You could already predict the kind of night you were in for and at this point you were too tired to not have fun with it.

“Rides, I suppose. We’re too old for the stalls.” He clicked his tongue, putting his hands into the pockets of his skinny jeans, staring disapprovingly at you.

“Oh, you are so right. Papa forbade me from playing games lest I fall victim to pride and immaturity. So pleased that throwing balls into holes is age restricted.” You threw some more popcorn into your mouth, feeling his stare burn into your face as you looked at him without any emotion.

“Didn’t you grow out of them after you turned, I don’t know, fifteen? How old are you?”

“You’re absolutely correct. We should hit the rides soon. I may not last fifteen minutes more. I’m practically decomposing as we speak.” You grinned at him making your way to the roller coaster, leaving him to match your pace.

“Roller coasters?” He called after you, rushing to catch up.

“Yes. Do you not like them?”

If this somehow greasier Tommy Wiseau said anything worse, you swore you literally would tear-

“I just think they’re too jumpy. And erratic. And noisy.”

You spun around wildly to face him, mouth dropping open. “What exactly did you expect from a fair, Lucky?”

“Loki.”

“Gesundheit. Have you ever been to a fair before or-“

You were just about to launch into a large rant when someone’s grip on your shoulder cut you off.

“Mario? What are you doing here?” The all-too-familiar voice made you instantly calm down as your best friend’s brother, your lord and savior, stepped near one of the most annoying people you could have met.

Which would be met with a more enthusiastic response had it not been for the presence of a girl with the most curly red hair accompanying him. She had her arm around his waist whilst his was secured around her shoulders and you immediately felt your words die down in your throat.

“Ah, James. We were just on our date.” He narrowed his eyes at you and you rolled yours at him, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Hey, man. I thought you were taking her to that restaurant down the road?” he questioned as the girl with him sent you a smile. Of course she’d have dimples.

“Thor told me this would better fit her,” Loki replied wearily.

“Wait a minute- you know Thor?”

“Know him?” Loki scoffed. “He’s my brother.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Given, we’re adopted siblings but I have to put up with his nonsense regardless.”

“Oh my fucking God, you’re the bitchy drama goth brother Thor talks about.”

“Bitchy drama goth— you’re lucky you got set up with me and not our sister.”

“I guess this date went super well?” Bucky piped up before you both clawed each other’s throats out.

“Simply wonderful.”

“Great.” He smiled awkwardly, before seemingly remembering who he had with him. “Oh shits, yeah—this is Dolores. Dot. Doll. I don’t know-“

“Dot is fine.” She smiled again, extending her hand in a shake. She had a flower tucked into her ear, matching the colour of her long skirt. Of course she did.

“This is Y/N, my sister’s best friend and that’s Loki,” Bucky introduced live-action Merida to you, as she gracefully replied with a small nod.

“You guys done?” Dot asked, switching her gaze between Loki and you.

“Yup, just finished. Loki was about to drop me off at my place. How about you?” You ignored your date altogether, instead focusing on how relaxed Bucky looked, none of his usual creases to be seen on his face. You liked it.

“I think we’ll hang around for a bit more. What do you say?” She looked up at him and Bucky nodded, a soft smile taking over his face.

“Sounds good to me. Text me when you get home, okay?” he reminded you, suddenly meeting your gaze. Your eyebrows furrowed at the intensity with which he was looking at you, but you gave him a thumbs up, agreeing.

“See ya tomorrow, Mario. Get home safe, please?” He waved one more time, as did Dolores, before they both made their way into the crowd, but not before Bucky threw you one more glance over his shoulder.

“Are you this hostile with every person your friends date or only James?” Loki sniggered from besides you, earning a sharp glare.

“One more word from you Severus and I will buy the oiliest piece of funnel cake and shove it down your throat.

But his words didn’t go over your head. You knew exactly what he was talking about and apparently it was so glaringly obvious that even others could see it.

Yikes.

Part 7

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #mcu fic #bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff #bucky angst #bucky barnes angst #college!bucky #college!au #college!bucky x reader #kumis5kchallenge

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crybabybyee · 2 years

Text

today is another day of great news for my pomeranian and i. her blood count has gone up to 16% from 12% in 2 weeks. im so so happy for her. she still has a bit to recover but she has so much more energy now, running around, barking and playing. i love her so much and its the best gift that this year has brung. for my dog to be getting healthier, and the rest of my family/animals are healthy and happy too. i feel like im really living presently this month. accepting things as they, not jumping forward or back, just being grateful for the present.

its strange, what being single/out of a toxic relationship and environment can really make you feel like. i have never felt ‘present’ for the last 3 years...constantly living in the past, constantly worried about the future.

but here i am, on a cold january day (but the sun is out) and im enjoying the day. ill be walking up to the horses soon with my baby to do all the chores, as no chores were done this morning due to vet appointment, and im happy to go out and enjoy the time with my baby, mum, and horses

i have no desire to check steam or twitch or anything, to see what hes playing, like who gives a fuck rn?

and i could have woken up so angry today. he texted me last night and said “have you been tampering with my accounts?”

i simply looked at it like “...” and resumed watching breaking dawn

he’s fucking desperate for my attention, isn’t he? at first i was so angry and wanted to reply but was like ..no. thats what he wants, you to simply reply and hes coming up with such bullshit now. ofcourse, i haven’t tried to log in on any of his accounts. why would i care or give 1 fuck, who hes talking to and what hes saying? he already made that blindingly obvious to me, im not that self loathing to try to log into his accounts. he really aint shit. he really thinks he is, tho. so, i let it slide...even if for some reason he thinks i ‘tampered’ with them, oh well. i clearly can’t give much of a shit if i havent replied to your last 4 messages or even opened them. im actually dreading seeing his name though now. what will be next? hes clearly a narc, and he’ll think of something that will grab my attention.

but anyway. even tho i woke up with that shitty message in my head, it didnt bring me down, i didnt think about it too much, and just had positive thoughts for my dog’s appointment. and it went great, there’s no way a crappy text from a boring, deadbeat, doing-the-same-thing-forever ex is going to take away my good vibes and positive thoughts. :)

i might draw some cards today

7 of pentacles

5 of swords

what are the odds of pulling that again...

i guess im really not supposed to pick that fight with him. and maybe thats why ive been given the strength to not respond to his texts that are trying to start a (pointless) fight. if he continues it i might say to check the privacy settings/log in history so he can see that ive NOT. cuz no way do i want him to believe i am some desperate ex stalking him cuz boy, im not.

thinking a lot of the future: investing time and effort into a long term goal. keep progress slow. perhaps that means my dogs, horses/new horse, working on loving myself...?

0 notes

ts-akhmim · 4 years

Text

Episode 8 | ”Being a muppet is a contagious disease. ” - Ali

omg so?! i need to do a proper long confessional and go through my thoughts because i just got like a tsunami of information but... jake lived?! and idoled out scott who i thought was gonna win?! hello?!? i'm so so so excited because now i get to work with jake and he is SUCH a shield, and me/him/autumn are gonna ride off into the sunset im manifesting it.

what the HELL is going on here first jake pulls out an idol (which i was JUST gossipping with jordan pines about him having it because i know just how he plays and would ya look at that!) i was so ELATED to read he did that, thinking ok, i gave him a fair warning those false beauties we're gonna get us all, and they voted him unanimously so surely he'll take one of them out and ... HE TAKES OUT SCOTT?? i dont even have time to process this bafoonery yet because here i am, minding my business, trying to watch micronesia to heal the hole in my heart left by w*nners at w*r, eating a piece of pizza and then BOOM we merge?? but oh ok! they said we get a nice little break, lemme not stress and go back to eating my piz- NOPE THERE IS SO SUCH THING AS A BREAK IN SURVIVOR GORL I SWEAR I PUT MY PHONE DOWN TO GET ONE BITE, I COULDNT EVEN ENJOY MY EXTRA CHEESE BECAUSE MY TELEPHONE IS BLOWING UPPPP people are spilling tea left and right, i probably dont even have time to write this so i gotta keep it short and sweet; the false beautys are really trying to slide in my pms and sing kumbaya and if they wanna sing with me, bring it on because they are not a songstress like i am, ill riff run and harmonize yall right off this island. PERIOD. ive been REALLY trying to play up this card where im just some dumb bitch, let everyone keep thinking im the mayor of boo boo the foolsville, but i know a lot more than i let on so catch the tea on that

i swear for it being our "day off" this sure has been the most work i feel like ive had in a hot minute first of all fuck the tomb but FUCK this pyramid even more the second it was announced i found the extra link to the slide puzzle on the blog within SECONDS but 1) i suck at slide puzzles and 2) MY COMPUTER CRASHED HALF WAY THROUGH IT SO I HAD TO START AGAIN. literally took me 2 hours to finish, so that was embarrassing, then much like how the tomb had questions, this pyramid has a hashi puzzle to solve in EIGHT MINUTES....which i dont even know what the fuck that is sorry to this hashi man i gave a good effort but didnt get it in time, so im gonna try again tomorrow of course but im sure someone who isnt a dumbass had better luck than me and got it so thats that on that ....also gorl some of these people aka kendall really got the audacity, she messages me today and is like IS JAKEY COMING TO YOU SAYING STUFF ABOUT ME TRYING TO PIT US AGAINST EACH OTHER oh gorl, if only you knew its ME going to jakey saying shit about YOU trying to get him against YOU, because your first mistake was trying to prepare an alliance to vote me out, your second mistake was running around telling everyone i have an idol, and your third mistake was making an enemy of jakey, now there's this angry jakey on the loose and im gonna just try to work my magic to tame him and keep him like a pet dragon on my side to get them out and then deal with whether i think ill be able to trust him going foward, but again, i know i voted him out last game so i cant rule out him trying to target me already, especially if somehow worst case scenerio people try to pick us off first for knowing each other also had a call with augusto which was.... interesting, look, i genuinely like him as a person even though i still feel some type of way about him turning fake on me, so i definitely want to maintain a friendship with him even if it's hard for me to just stomach talking to him because of how stupid he must think i am, keep your friends close but your frenemys closer!! then i just had a call with devon too which was also interesting because, i do like him as a person, but idk how to feel about it!!! after all of them lying to me in the beginning im already feeling PTSD and dont know if i can trust anyone, but he gave me some valuable information even more so just reaffirming them all thinking i have the idol which i know is a crock of bs because DAMMIT IVE TRIED I JUST DONT HAVE IT. I know amir has it, it's so obvious to me, maybe augusto?? but i think amir. apparently devon also just kinda said he think he could see the first vote coming down to me or jakey or even him which.......makes me really nervous, i wasnt planning on fighting for immunity at the auction i wouldve rather had an advantage of some sort, but i think with this cast, and the amount of intertwined relationships going into this first tribal, i want that immunity necklace and im gonna do my damndest to get it OKAYYY this game is going to drive me insane, i feel like ive been running my mouth TOO much and talking to too many people and am gonna get voted out for it but i also simultaneously feel like i havent talked to people no where near enough and, am gonna be voted out for it so ???buckle the fuck up ladies we've officially boarded the confusion express so im just gonna try and sit back and enjoy the ride ig

Welp we are on the bottom... shit. I'm going to be honest, this week has not been great for me. Like my real life is slowly going to shit and now my fake life has been screwed. Thanks Jakey... you dick. All is not lost, because out there in the distance is the iconic duo of Jordan Pines and Kendall Duffy AKA Sarah and Woo. You know, Sarah and Woo. That iconic duo in Cagayan. Remember that one time Sarah walked up to Woo and said "Sup I'm Sarah," and he nodded and said "Woo". And that other time they were sitting on the same log laughing at something Tony said? That is stuff of legends man. Okay so genuinely Jordan meant to say Tony and Woo but he accidentally said Sarah and Woo and now this is our legacy. The plan is to play it both ways. As this isn't going to be a simple Pangonging. Obviously a beauty is going to leave but before we all go, they are going to try to get rid of some of the brawns. The goal is that the beauty isn't me and the brawn isn't Jordan. I know you're legally not supposed to trust Jordan Pines but it's never really been the case for me? IDK maybe it's cause he always gets sniped before I betray him. Maybe it's cause the one time he voted me out it was cause I committed suicide by cop. But for the most part he's a realible ally. Also this would be a shitty and stupid lie right? Like he knows I don't have an idol, literally everyone knows that! Trying to get in my good graces is a terrible fucking idea, Jesus. Right now I'm just going to market myself and the others as a free vote. I know it's not realistic to get Augusto and Amir to the finals but it's all I really want. We've been through shit together. I don't want to be put in a position to get them out. I also believe that either Jakey and Ali has the idol. So this round I'm going to flush it. I'm not going to be able to get him out, I just need him to believe he's going to be voted out. He's a very paranoid individual, it shouldn't be too difficult.... I am not going home tonight. I refuse to.

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okay so i haven't done a good typed confessional in a WHILE and i have thoughts. so i'm basically really frustrated with a lot of this tribe and i don't know how to vocalise it. but first the positives.. the fact that i have an alliance of me/autumn/jake brings me such a rush of seretonin, i love them both and i will fight my hardest to get the three of us to the endgame of this game. i think rn my goal final five is me/jake/autumn/adam/devon, adam because i dont think he is playing this game as well as he necessarily thinks he is, but i also think we have trust and he is someone who is scoop-up-able? and then devon i get good energy from him and his straightforward energy i'd like to see in the endgame. the rest however.... whew. well actually Liam is fine, he is sweet and doing his best. of the rest tho... hmm. kendall's energy doesn't quite land with me, her dry sense of humour doesn't really work with me ha so i feel like we are gonna struggle to gel as allies (especially since we are either side of the weird brawn/beauty divide). augusto is very chatty but its a lot of chatting for... the sake of it, like his social game is to just overwhelm you with lots of messages but its nothing of substance. amir i actually like!! he has me-energy, i would actually like him to stick around (he is a good shield too). duncan i am still sus about from premerge, but i'd love to mend that bond because i might need duncan?! tj and jordan both give snake energy... tj is suddenly back to being non-commital with me and it frustrates me, i wish he would like... talk to me KJLSADF. jordan is the same i always get weird energy from him and he was in that weird alliance during the swap and didn't tell me... feel a f10 boot for jordan ideally. honestly its just frustrating i feel like everyone on this tribe is so cagey and like just thinks talking a lot is social game?! and its... not. but yeah ideally first four merge boots: kendall, augusto, tj & jordan (tho the last two is open to consideration if they stop being shady to me KJSDFA).

I just got immunity in the auction and I feel like I wasted a chance to get some long term for my game. Because I wasn't going anywhere this round (I don't think), but like at least it prevented some other people from getting it which allows me some room to make a couple moves without too many repercussions. In terms of social standing, I truly think I have put myself in a good spot. Jakey and Jordan have both said they want me to be their number ones; Devon also has said the same and has told me that he holds the Double Vote. I know that Autumn and Duncan are both willing to work with me in our alliance with Jordan. Liam and I have bonded quite a bit. And I get good vibes from Augusto, Kendall, and Adam. So the big question now is, my target at the moment is Amir... how do I get him out? I need to break up Amir, Augusto, and Kendall so that I have a better chance of working with Augusto specifically down the line and hopefully Kendall as well. I have a feeling that Adam will push for one of the trio and the trio will push for Adam or Jakey, which should give me plenty of ammo to try and make that move. Correction to my last confessional... the trio can't target Jakey because he's immune. Suck it!

i really... really just got my second idol huh... i cant believe it. i bodied that idol hunt, i sat their trying like six hundred combos for the morse code, got that demonic tile and did that evil hashi puzzle... im so happy hehe okay so ignore my super jaded confessional from yesterday im back in again akdjfsaf im literally on a reign of terror doing harsh confessionals then apologising but askdjfafa we move. so yesterday was a real busy day, we had the auction, i called lots of people and... i got myself a little bit of bling. with the auction first, it was really interesting. i misunderstood the "idol block" so i snatched it up, but then it just blocks hunting for the idol versus playing one, but for my mental health am glad i have that. i also got the vote revealer, which was like a mid-tier thing that im happy to have just got a second thing tbh. then i had like six hundred calls kaljsdfas. i called with devon first, he is really sweet and we had a great talk tbh? i really like him and hope we stick together. i did then go on to have very similar conversations to the one i had with him, with augusto and amir, but i felt best about the conversation me and devon had tbh. augusto is sweet, and very social. like i'd prefer to vote him to kendall, but i like him ha and feel like we have a bond now. i think i could be a good number moving forwards (i wouldn't want him gone 11th/10th). amir is also very nice, we are calling tomorrow, and i just dont think targetting amir is in my best interest rn? like what's the end goal in doing that. so then right now. i think i want the merge vote to be kendall? i feel like if we let that trio slide, its scary, and i have a closer connection to amir and augusto of the three. i think then the brawn tribe can turn inwards, but im eager to push the brawn tribe like "implosion" until after that trio is taken apart (to the style of splitting up alex c/jones/mo from montenegro) also otherwise i got an IDOLLL, or rather my second hehe. i put in a LOT of work to get it, i translated morse code, i did a demonic hashi puzzle, i got the 2048 tile. i earned this idol and im very proud. now i have two idols so have such wiggle room. and i'm building bonds across the tribe... im not saying im set, but... im covered for the time being

okay so im a clown and got frustrated with jordan for telling jake he was hesitant to keep me in... jordan just told me he has been downplaying our connection to people like jake KJLSDAFA so i fully just bought into nothing.

i am starting to feel my standing in the game rise, like im building bonds... everywhere. like im starting to become set to go the distance because i have lots of lowkey social bonds and because im not overtly super strategic i dont think i seem as threatening.

okay so ideal merge bootlist: f4: me/autumn/jake/devon, adam (5th), liam/jordan (6th/7th), amir (8th), duncan (9th), augusto (10th), tj (11th), kendall (12th) and then at the moment the order i would vote for people as a juror (bringing this back from montenegro): jake > autumn > amir > jordan > duncan(?) > devon > augusto > adam > tj > kendall > liam because i think jake has already idoled someone, and to make it to f3 after that is super impressive. autumn is a queen, has real strategic savvy and will have made moves to get to the end. amir is very much like autumn and him making it to the end. jordan is an amazing player and tbh deserves a win. duncan is really in game-mode and id love to see him in FTC (what a role reversal), devon has a real rootable underdog story, augusto is a social king, adam needs to pick it up beyond just targetting beauties to get my vote. tj/kendall are question marks for me, and then liam i LOVE but he doesn't necessarily 100% want to be here so i would be tentative to vote him. but its crazy because i think: jake/autumn/devon/adam/liam/jordan/amir/duncan... all trust me to some extent that's... such a large portion of the tribe. so i need to be careful im not scorning people too much, but this is a real work-able situation i think ahh

Interesting development that both Kendall and Amir want/wanted to call and talk to me. I just finished talking to Kendall (she is so sweet, I enjoy talking to her!) and I definitely see an avenue where we work together, but I am concerned that there does seem to be a guard up, which I totally understand given that we haven't been on a tribe together. We both kind of mentioned that Liam has been flirting with the idea of asking to be voted out which gave me an avenue to not say that the name I would throw out is Amir. I do hope that Liam isn't adamant about going because I truly do care for him and want him to stay in this game. I picked up a great ally in him after the initial Brawn vote and losing him now won't be fun. It does dispel this Brawn alliance people probably expect to be happening, but am I at ease with Liam going to facilitate that? But if that happens, that delays the fight between Adam/Jakey against the trio of Augusto/Amir/Kendall, which in fact would be good for me as it allows me to slide by for another week... ugh, decisions decisions. Why do I feel like this first vote could determine the rest of my game?

So Liam still wants to be in the game, which is good. I can easily work with that. Yes, I feel awful telling Kendall I thought the vote would be Liam, but now that he seems to want to be in the game, I think I can work with Liam possibly staying. I still have to wait it out and listen to what some others think, but I may be back on the board of going for one of the trio. I know Jakey wants to do Kendall, but I don't want her to go just yet. Eventually, yeah probably, but I do want her here.

Whew merge merge merge. Tonight is the first night to play my legacy advantage, i could block a vote but honestly im probably not going to. Id be pretty caught off guard if i was the target tonight and I think id rather let it fester to an idol, whether for me or someone else later tha depends on my game play. Last night was the auction and boy did jordan win big, i got a whole vote steal that im pretty sure no one knows about. I created a believable (i think) lie about what i bid on and spread and thankfully adam came out the gate with a super fact checkable lie about the auction so i think most of the heats on him. For the vote it could be a beauty butpart of me really sees liam going home just cause people are so scared of how many brawn are in the game, and like thats fine i can deal with that. I am slowly building my relationships to the point where i can get the ball rolling enough to do some damage. Ive been biding my time in the shadows for most of this game, but Jordan Pines is about to rise!

this round is what we call a mixed bag like the auction? hated that girl. I saved my money and all I got was a drawing like sis this is the Survivor Auction not an actual auction ;-; but other than that, I’ve felt really good about how I’ve been playing? Like always, I’m trying to be the Belle of the Ball and have everyone want me as a date yknow? Currently, I have my main allies (Amir, Kendall, Devon) but others (Autumn, Duncan, Ali, Jordan, Jakey) have expressed that they want to work with me which is cute! I don’t know who to trust tho ngl but yay? My main priority is getting my footing in the game this first round and hopefully getting out a Brawn. The main two I want gone from the Brawns are Liam M and Jordan Pines. Liam M is the easier sell and I don’t mind that, Jordan Pines is someone I want gone soon though. I also want Adam gone if at all possible sometime soon but we shall see!

i take it back jordan and duncan can go again...? literally like both of them preach up and down that we are gonna work together, then pull shady stuff like saying me and adam are a duo in their alliance chat of gremlins with love of my life autumn and professional robot tj?! literally just because y'all linked up at swap and think you are gods gift to alliances doesnt mean me and adam are a duo? i just talk to him and actually give him a chance in this game unlike like... 99% of this cast. now i cant really defend adam at all or people are gonna try and snap my neck? which sucks... adam was in my endgame but because i see him having a losing finalist arc versus me being a duo with him. so that sucks but well. it just reconfirms to me that i have to trust autumn. which is not hard because i literally love her sm and i want to see thrive in this season. so i am praying it works out. this cast continues to prove that being a muppet is a contagious disease.

im absolutely LIVID right now.... i dont even know where to begin ?? let's start with this: are we playing SURVIVOR or are we playing america's next top CLOWN?? because based on how silly all these people are it doesnt seem like survivor. this is my 3rd time playing this game, and never once have i ever made it to a merge where .... every single person wants to just settle on one name since they're the "easy" vote.... and yet that's all im being told with people wanting to vote liam?? at this point i hope the plan is to vote ME out and everyone is just telling me liam because i dont want to play the game with a bunch of feeble minded school of fish who have no backbone. first of all everyone has wanted to do nothing but play that ANNOYING ass "ooh its been quiet i havent heard a name yet" game for the entire day. We're 3 hours before tribal and all the sudden everyone wants to sing kumbaya and vote for liam??? because he's not around, which guess what it does make him an easy vote but....this is survivor why would you EVER vote that person off in the merge right away, he can literally go next or any other time. I refuse to sit back and just conform to it, ill probably end up having to, but im gonna try to push what to ME makes the most sense, not only for myself but for everyone... to get one of those 3 false beautys out. I've been going to a lot of people and basically saying "Let me break it down for you: one of them 150% has the idol??? and thanks to the suvivor auction, and based on what ive gathered from people they probably have advantages too.....why waste this vote being "easy" because then next round....they're gonna know it'll be one of them and so......they're gonna play all their shit and take someone out, and i absolutely reserve the right to laugh at whoever it is because theyre an idiot and didnt want to wake up and play the game (unless it's me of course oop) I've approached, jakey, autumn, duncan, jordan, ali, devon, tj, pretty much ANYONE who has a brain to just state the obvious.....its stupid getting liam out. literally the stupidest and quite frankly downright embarrassing move to make for a group of players of this caliber. and you know what responses ive gotten? "oh its too soon to rock the boat" "we have to get one of those brawns out" "yeah we just have to go with the brains on this one" ??? too soon??? at merge??????? to play the game of survivor??????????? at this point im about to try and just tell liam with the very slim chance that he has an idol and can use it on himself because how am i supposed to try and play the game of survivor with people who dont want to play its frustrating. **update as i was writing this i just had a call with jordan pines, im not as mad anymore after smoking weed with him for like 20 minutes ahfdd but its BORING LIKE WAKE UP PEARL LETS PLAY SURVIVOR...i probably made a big mistake pushing those 3 to as many people as i just did but whatever hopefully it at least planted seeds with people and people actually try and approach me in the future rounds with that idea again in other news, the auction happened and i got the power to go to the prejuror island and plead my case with them regarding this next vote, no one was even there so that was lovely i felt like i was talking to myself so nothing new there, i peeped connor was online but didnt have anything to say when i showed up, much like how he never had anything good to say in the game and that's why he was voted out, but ANYWAY. im pissed i made a case to them to vote for amir and now no one will even make the move with me. I also bought a challenge advantage which i wanted MOSTLY so i could just tell people thats what i got from it because to me i suck at challenges anyway, so it shouldnt paint as much of a target on my back and i want people to know i dont have one of those really scary ones (and i also want to keep making people think amir or kendall has something good), but ali did confide in me he has the vote reveal which made me trust him a lot more, and i dont plan on revealing to anyone what he told me so anywho, tribal is NOT gonna go my way tonight, i tried to make a move but liam is unfortunately completely unsaveable because he's not around even though i do like talking to him personally, i opened the door to people and it just got slammed in my face but in this game you have to learn when to drop it so im hoping i dropped it fast enough to not be a future target because people could still very well vote me out next because they'd be taking out the only real beauty left!

tj, jordan and duncan are all going home as soon as possible. they really think they are slick and they are not. they think they can badmouth me, my game and my position and it wont get back to me. there is a word for it and it is clownery. one of them is going to get to stepping really soon. maybe jordan.

also i cant be too mad at liam because im voting him but i wish it wasnt like this. well. what can you do. if he plays an idol im playing mine.

Now that we're told the right day... Well, it looks like most people are back on the Liam Train, and damn I really don't want this move to be made. Like, yes, it will set me up well moving forward: less "Brawn Alliance" hype, more battles between Adam/Ali vs. Beauty Babes, and a decent amount of social mobility for me. But this just feels like a giant waste and I don't know how to stop this at this rate.

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First of all: YAASSSSSSSS WE LOVE MAKING THE MERGE!!!! I’ve gotten over my Scott grief and actually am pretty content with him out of the game since he was a big contender to win it all. The time I’ve been able to spend talking to people has been amazing and I feel like I genuinely have a good relationship with everyone on the tribe besides Liam, which is why I’m happy to see him go. He’s a really nice guy but he’s not adding anything to my game. I expect the vote to go 11-1-1 tonight. I could always get idoled out or blindsided and that would suck but you try your best and do what you can! I think I have EXCELLENT relationships with Amir, Jordan and Autumn and that’s like the kingpins of each group so if someone comes after me hopefully I’ll hear about it one way or another. I need to get my head out of Amir’s ass though, I’m most excited to play with him and we called for literally 2 hours and 50 minutes yesterday. I’ve always thought he was cute and intelligent from when I was in the community before and I fangirled getting to play with him. I like to think I’m in a good position in this game so far, we’ll see as the game progresses. One last thing? ADAM!? SIS?!?! EVERYONE IS AWARE YOU LIED TO THEM! YOUR ASS IS GOING HOME NEXT! PERIODT!! (Hopefully I’ll be here to help vote you out lol

Well, here we are? This is where my game was MADE back in Guyana, however, I clearly don't have a solidified alliance I am willing to take to the end at this stage. We have 5 Brawns, three former winners, a person I voted out in Guyana, two people that voted me out, and a person I tried voting out last round all still in the game. Still, I am going to make the best of it. In the short period of time this game has provided, I have been able to make REALLY solid connections. Not all of them are 100% genuine, but the hope is that they're enough to gain trust and information that I can use to advance my game.

if i go home tonight im gonna lose my marbles

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so basicallyyyy jakey is gathering intel from the other sideand apparently theyre all scared of me, grow up??? im literally harmless wtf

HOHOHOHOOGO WHO WANTS SOME TEA ? SO DUNCAN SPILLED THAT back long ago on original hathor, remember when I was losing my mind thinking aj ratted everything to Adam It was THE TRUTH and I’m glad aj has been dealt with. It’s what he deserves .

adam thinks hes so fucking slick running around telling everyone i gotta go and that i have the idol, and then messaging me in my pms trying to call and have a "tea-spilll uwu" when hes just going to use that against me anywayyyy honey u arent as smart as u think u are, and when the time is right, you're getting crucified ADAM CAME TO ME TO BE LIKE "FUCK JAKEY WON IMMUNITY" and im like "ik :( " and he runs to jakey and goes "THE RATS ARE MAD U WON" mark my words if im leaving this game i will blow him tf up on the way out

these people are all rats ALLIANCE: Threats R Us members: jakey ali autumn Source: jakey ALLIANCE: (name unknown) Members: Autumn Duncan TJ Jordan Source: Autumn so autumn ratted on an alliance to me and not the other, which lets me know that she is far more invested in Ali that she is in Duncan. Working with Duncan is not going to save face with autumn, i have to treat her as a separate entity and work with her genuinely if i want safety from ali, like she sold duncan tj and jordan down a river to me so fast i love her so much, i want to work with her but i have to see how far it goes people i want out : adam tj liam ali jordan but rn ill settle for anyone but me cuz no one is talking to me

devon wanted to talk real quick and tellin me that there was a whole ass plan started by adam to get me out, like say the vote is kendall but actually vote for me, and the plan was entertained by brawn, also i told jakey i have the idol, and jakey told me ali has 2 idols a vote reveal and an idol block

#BackWithVengeance

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asteralien · 6 years

Text

wolf 359 liveblog

hey uh so wolf 359 is a special thing for me and i want to record my reactions to it for my own personal posterity or w/e so spoilers only below the cut. merry christmas and merry surviving-wolf 359-finale night!

(pre-episode listening to the one-last-thing ep) michelle agresti made goddard futuristics badges she’s SO GOOD and i’m crying a lot. and everyone was there. a wolf 359 reunion. i’m crying. “the wolf of wolf street”

okay episode time

this music signals nothing emotionally stable

is cutter the old man. did pryce give him a new body. OH GOD CUTTER IS THE OLD MAN AND PRYCE GAVE HIM A NEW BODY RED ALERT

they’re telling their stories and telling each other’s parts of the stories this is the creepiest shitting thing

fuck off cutter no one has lived happily ever after i hate you SO much. i hope pryce stabs you through your throat before she conveniently dies too

“let’s get started” fuck me.

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i have some genuine concerns right now about evil and plans

TELL THEM MINKOWSKI!! GET THEM!! CUT THEM DOWN WITH ONLY YOUR RIGHTEOUS ANGER!! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!

eiffel talking about the alien!!! ayyyyyyyyyyy boi!!

god emma sherr-ziarko is just.... so good. she’s SO good. minkowski is strong and commanding but there’s this very slight tinge of fear and desperation and i love her SO much i love her and her va so much she’s SO good

eiffel’s and hera’s conversation :’)

.......uh yall hey quick question did we time travel or time loop or is this just a flashback. i’m too trained for panic to trust this and i’m weirded out akshkdjh

....but hera’s and eiffel’s first meeting......im crying......bye.........im out....... “it’s good to know you’re around” :’) :’) :’) let’s see how far we’ve come

is this scene gonna be kepcobi #confirmed i’d scream. OH SHIT THO JACOBI LAYING DOWN THE TRUTH. BLESS IT.

EIFFEL AND LOVELACE ARE BEING FRIENDS!!! IT’S BEEN SO LONG!! I LOVE THEM!!!! EIFFELLACE FRIENDSHIP LIVES!! oh god they brought up his alcoholism and i’m crying again. also like. eiffel appreciates lovelace being there and it’s SO pure but i’m also really really really glad someone expressed some appreciation that eiffel is there too. like. he needs that. the boy needs that.

MINKOWSKI. MINKOWSKI. BABE. YOU’VE SAID THREE WORDS BUT I LOVE YOU AND SUPPORT YOU FOR WHATEVER YOU DECIDE.

EVERYONE’S REACTION WHEN SHE SAID SHE WAS GOING TO STAY. GOD BLESS. GOOD MOMENT. GOOD TEAM MOMENT.

“destroy an entire species” oh GOD pryce&cutter you’re trying to kill the aliens??? what the?? what the shit??? why??? god why

minkowski’s speech.... minkowski trying to get kepler and young on her side.......everyone grOAnIng when rachel quotes princess bride (shut up eiffel u don’t even get that groan privilege)...... good stuff........

jacobi......babe..............! your unrequited love is showing..... not to mention.....your humanity....

“thank you daniel... and goodbye” SHOT! THROUGH! THE HEART!! and unrequited kepcobi is to blame!!!

jacobi: yea so i’m a real mean dude jacobi: but also hey i just met you and this is crazy but i just swore undying loyalty to you so love me maybe

oh SHIT. OH SHIT. OH SHIT. EIFFEL’S LOG. NO. I’M. THAT WAS A FUCKING LOW BLOW. SHIT. OH SHIT. HE BELIEVES HE’S GOING TO DIE. GOD. GOD. JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL.

okay look. look here. douglas eiffel is so damn strong. douglas eiffel is so damn strong. he can sit there believing in his heart that he is going to die today at the hands of depraved and relentless villains and still speak words of strength and encouragement and love for his daughter who he hasn’t seen in years, and then come out only to encourage his commanding officer as well. there’s a reason douglas eiffel fulfills the communications officer role in this show and it’s because of this. it’s because he’s tough enough for this: he’s tough enough to smile for the sake of other people.

OH MAN!! OH MAN!!!! THE LES MIS QUOTE WITH MINKOWSKI AND EIFFEL! I’M DOWN! ! PERSON DOWN!!!!! BYE!!!

.................................no. no. NOPE. he called her renee. she loves him so much. she just wants to know he’s happy. he. she. he. he. she. she. i’m. no.

SHIT lovelace backing minkowski up. that’s what i’m HERE for.

RENEE MINKOWSKI LAUGHING!! SO MUCH OF RENEE MINKOWSKI’S LAUGHTER!!! I’M SLAIN AND I’M IN LOVE!! SHE’S PLAYING COMMANDING OFFICER! SHE’S BEAUTIFUL AND GOOD AND ADORABLE AND PERFECT!!! whenever minkowski calls it “her” station i cry because minkowski deserves like a whole planet to command not just a station but she is so good at running her station. i love her. she’s good. she’s good.

i’m fricking. i’m fricking proud of myself. i heard that music and loved it and then cutter said it was based on a shakespeare play and i thought “that’s the tempest music.” and it was fuckin tempest music. this isn’t about wolf 359 i just gotta yell that even before cutter quoted it i felt that tempest feel in my soul.

i swear to pan The Harpoon is one of my favorite wolf 359 characters

jacobi!!! a great soul!!! maybe not a good one but a great one!! blowing that kazoo in victor’s face!! classique DID JACOBI JUST GET SHOT. SHIT. PLEASE TELL ME THAT WAS LOVELACE SHOOTING VICTOR. WHAT’S GOING ON. WHAT.

so like is eiffel/jacobi a rarepair. idk i feel like they might mesh well together under better less morally suspect circumstances. the whole “want to turn my shit around and do some good for a chance” thing. and also the idea of jacobi being a bad influence on anne and completely destroying her chance of being an Upright and Morally Child Who Doesn’t Like Setting Things On Fire (At All)

*takes the deepest possible breath* AALLLEXXAAAAAANDDEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRR

ssshshiiiiiiiiitttttttt that’s what decima was for

BOB’S BACK and god what i would give if bob would just. just. fuckin flatten them. just break past their shitting scienceyfied weapons and flatten them.

OH MY GOD EIFFEL WHAT. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT. IM SCREAMING. DOUG. DOUG NO. NO. NO YOU TERRIBLE CHILD.

“with my life, darlin. with my life.” douglas f. eiffel..................!!!!

jacobi no!! stop hurting him!!

cutter just.........???? killled????? an alien????????????????????????

....................shit. shit. NO. don’t........take.....his memories........shit.... this is bad this is bad this is SO bad. this is SO SO BAD. pryce. pryce needs to die. she needs to die nice and quick ok she needs to go HERA!! HERO!! THANK GOD!

this is the scene where kepler comes and saves jacobi??? right???? right

the eiffera is so strong and i’m SO weak for it he believes in her so much damn......... and pryce can get bent hera IS the army

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIT WARREN!!!! DAMN! WARREN!! GOD i knew his monologuing would kill him. i knew it. he should have just walked out. kepler. damn kepler. DAMN kepler. SHIT. SHIT.

jacobi.... jacobi no.......... jacobi don’t....................... J A C O B I [LONG UNENDING SCREAM]

M I N K O W S K I !!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SHE TOOK MONTY PYTHON AWAY FROM HIM!!! HOW DARE SHE! HOW FUCKIN DARE SHE!!! NO!!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!!! HARPOON TO THE RESCUE!! SHIT MAN!!! HOLY SHIT!! HARPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!! [AIR HORNS BLARE]

uhhhhhhhhh i don’t like the way he said “let’s finish this” oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no HIS MEMORIES OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO OH NO EIFFEL NO!!!

and he’s awake for it. shit. oh god. oh god. oh god. he’s saying his final words. shit. shit. shit.

[SCREAMS FOR AN ETERNITY] HE NEVER GOT TO SAY HIS WORDS TO HERA

AND NOW EIFFEL AND MINKOWSKI ARE MEETING HE COMPARED HER TO KIRK AND HIM TO UHURA I’M DYING

...

....

they’re all gonna die aren’t they.

fuck.

NO! THEY’RE GOING TO GO THROUGH THE STAR! THEY’RE GOING TO GO THROUGH THE STAR!!

minkowski is completely and totally alone right now and i’m crying abt it. i’m crying a lot abt it rn. everything is going to shit. hell. HELL. this is my christmas present from gabriel fuckin urbina and co. hell. hell is my present. thanks gabriel urbina and co. this is some sweet sweet hell you’ve giftwrapped all pretty and nice for me.

minkowski and lovelace are okay.........................?

HOLY!! JACOBI!!! JACOBI’S GOOD!! HOLY SHIT!! I’M BEAMING SO HARD RIGHT NOW!!!!! OH MY GOD! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

eiffel calling her renee in that gentle quiet cautious voice is going to be the death of me. it is. i’m going to literally implode.

they’re............they’re going home...................they’re going home and alan rodi’s music is going to kill me..... doug just wants to stay with his friends......even now when he doesn’t really know them.........

okay. this is going to take some time to absorb. i feel incredibly..........something. i don’t feel quite the sense of loss like i did at the end of taz balance because that was a definite end of something, i knew it wasn’t coming back because it was over (for the most part). this..... it’s probably not going to come back but their story isn’t over. douglas eiffel’s story for sure isn’t over, it’s just starting over again because he was a hero. they’re all heroes.

“that was... wolf 359.”

#language cw #i'm.......................................................hmm #talk to me tomorrow #i have a lot to process emotionally speaking and it's going to take a while #i need some headspace time.

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