#i havent drawn them in so long…. but now i may just have to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

c0rvidbones · 2 months

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hello I love your art a whole lot!! tell me more about Wit (he's hot and evil and I require more juicy details) and Ruby (his design goes so hard) please?

oh my god hi i did not expect to come back to 20 notifs. (/pos) youve given me a much needed ego boost tonight thank you. is it bad i cant remember having ever posted ruby art?? ive only ever gotten One comm of him which is a crime, my violent martyr son should rly get more love than i give him 😔 but thank you for asking! buckle up this is gonna be a long fuckin post ♡ everything under the cut including relevant character art

WIT

behold, all art of wit i have including one i havent posted here bc i never actually finished it and the wip of him being a silly giggly boy. pls know i came up with him like MAYBE a month ago. two, tops.

SO wit is actually a what-if au of another oc of mine, his name is doodle. doodle (seen below) is a very robin-hood-esque oc, honorable thief and kindhearted, swashbuckler rogue that dual wields rapiers bc hes insane. but hes insane in like a normal way. he was a horrible child but he did grow out of it and its rare to see him w his hair down so pardon me making him look absurdly pretty in that one.

as you can see there are some (but not MANY) differences between the two. kid wit does have the starry hands/peets im just forgetful dont @ me about it djdjdj

ANYWAYS so the what-if of the au that wit is, essentially, little singular things didn't happen to people in that au world. it goes like so;

wit: never met his childhood best friend when he was a freshly injured orphan. was alone from the (elf) ages of 0-16. ended up studying magic (illusion wizard) since he didn't have someone to lean on for that sort of thing.

laika (wit's mom): never truly broke out of an archfey's madness curse. stuck with a very twisted version of the spell Tasha's Hideous Laughter burned into her mind. everything is funny and if it's scary? even funnier. she died briefly. shes back now, but still madnessed.

perseverance (wit's dad): never saved his mother from a death blow in the be-all end-all fight to save his home. was held back by someone who he thought was a friend, killed that person and then ultimately spiralled so hard that he became a lich. may or may not have accidentally killed laika.

something something one decision can change your whole life, me and my friend loved playing with that concept.

okay now that you know a lil lore/history i can dive into what wit is like.

as a kid (drawn with the short megafloofy hair) he's very mischievous and bastardly, almost always smiling or grinning but it's more to lean into the uncanny valley effect his eyes cause than out of any actual joy or anything. he doesn't Blink and he knows it unnerves people because he also has a freakishly high insight (i think its like a +9 or smth??? at level 9??). he loves to come up with fucked up spells, like. for example i saw a silly post on here the other day that was very jokingly having a wizard cast a spell of "10000 bricks until you die" but then i was immediately aware wit would (1) come up with that spell, make it functional, and have it unfortunately obliterate everyone that gets hit with it, and (2) he would call it Wit's Bricks which i think is fuckin funny. he would also come up with spells of like. cause heatstroke. boil all fluid in your body. FREEZE all fluid in your body. he's a little freak with extremely low empathy for those he isn't connected to with blood ties. that said, he's kind to his family (albeit very blunt and will call them out if theyre being stupid) and inquisitive. he DID look his dad in the eye when he met him for the first time and went "are you dead?" which. again, hilarious, but BRUTALLY blunt. he then called his dad cool because yes his dad is now a lich and therefore undead. he's a little freak but he's still a kid and that is ultimately his saving grace, what small child isn't a little freak.

as an adult (long ponytail) i get a feel of him being aro and using romance as a way to manipulate people. he's definitely still not a good person and far more stoic than he was as a child. also he most definitely maintains a constant illusion to make it seem like his eyes are always closed, which lends an air of mystery to the strange elf that seems to always be standing right behind every throne in every kingdom of faerun. i say this because i like to think he would become what's called a King's Wit, which is like a combo of royal advisor, court mage, and "guy the regent has insult other nobility since insults are beneath the reigning royal". he uses all of that to his advantage, gaining the ear and trust of every single person of noble blood that is part of any royal or ruling court, and he will bend and twist their choices so subtly that they won't realise he led them to ruin until it's already too late. which is his ultimate plan. he's STILL somewhat a robin hood style of character, but he takes it a bit further and with far less kindness to the nobility. he guts their coffers completely and every hoarded coin down to the last copper inevitably will land its way conveniently into the lap of the common folk. he does take a healthy chunk for himself - did you know being a wizard was EXPENSIVE in dnd btw? i didnt until i made wit - but most of it is for the local citizens. he does this everywhere he goes if he sees that it needs to happen. fucker topples kingdoms For Fun, because he never gets caught or credited with the ruin he leaves behind himself. he's awful. he probably still comes up with fucked up spells and he manipulates his way into wherever he wants to be. i love him.

---

RUBY

behold! @polterpumpkin drew my (not very) little guy for me! this is part of a greater set but this is the fully coloured one and arguably my fave bc it captures the absolute batshit energy ruby brings to the table.

ruby is a tiefling that was born in a lab. voluntarily, his parents participated in a sort of study that wanted to eval why it is tieflings could be born to non-tiefling parents. (both his parents are half-orcs, interestingly!) he participated in it up to a certain point, before he got sick of being poked and prodded and Watched. that's when he demanded to be released and, when he wasn't, both his parents helped him escape, unfortunately leaving his other two tiefling-born siblings behind in the process. both parents Died helping him escape, and he was embittered as is by the whole study bs, and then to have his parents die Saving him? it left him with this sort of hole he didn't know how to feel.

so he fills that hole with every vice he finds agreeable. he drinks, he fights, and he drinks again. he's a drunken monk, and one full of unbridled rage and a death wish. he isn't my happiest oc but he isn't my worst off (that would be talisman bloodhunter). he's constantly seeking a grand and worthy cause to die for, literally. he's a wannabe martyr, because he doesn't think he has anything to live for. no lovers, no friends, no allies, MAYBE a coworker or two on the occasion he's needed (he is so not needed most of the time, because it isn't often any job needs an angry monk tief to glare around the place). he has just those two sides to himself - party animal and underground drunk brawler - because he doesn't want to think about the pain underneath them both. he's tragic in a very human way, hilariously enough, but he's not a bad person. even if he's being dragged by the tail to do a job, he's ultimately going to be helpful and he ALWAYS keeps his team alive. he'll grumble about it but he'll do it, and if you thank him he brushes it off, muttering something or other about how it's just his job, don't Thank him for that. i think having a friend would Fix him but fuck if i know what would get past his thick skin 😔

i dont get to play or write ruby really, not for any specific reason other than the dnd games im in have been going for So long, and that i havent really been super inspired to write him. but i love him! literally my car is named after him! i have so many feelings for him and i hope one day i get to play/write him so he can be more fleshed out.

#c0rvidspeaks #ask me about my ocs #and-a-pidgey-in-a-wepear-tree #ruby #wit dalca #oc #i was almost done w this like an hour ago but the fucking APP CRASHED and ate my whole reply #also the tags is where i realise i never gave ruby a last name oh noo

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a-very-tired-raven · 9 months

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Okay, since ive been getting a lot of love for my ary lately, id like to give you guys some top ary blogs ive followed for years, that i feel they dont get enough love.

Keep in mind that these are not in order from best to least, just in numbered order to make things easy.

(Another thing! While i may have found the majority of these blogs from undertale content, i need you to understand that a lot of these either dont do undertale art as frequently as they used to, or not at all. So please dont go in expecting that these are all undertale blogs based on MY intrests. Thank you.)

1. @springbon-t-art /@thecoolerspringbon-t has WONDERFUL roundhouse like style, and her fanart and characters range from all over(cuphead and bendy and the ink machine are just two examples, she has so much more unrecognized works and animatics on youtube that i think deserves much more love)

2. @twitchydoodle i havent visted this wonderful blog in a while, but i have followed for a good time(lets just say for a few years lol) so i cant say for sure what art is posted there at this moment, HOWEVER, i CAN say that twitchy has a Breathtaking art style, and has some of the most interesting and fleshed out ocs!!! Definitely check em out!

3. @calcium-cat i know cals been gettin a little bit more attention over the last year or so, but i still think she deserves much more recognition for her art. She has wonderful and thought out fanfics, not to mention the funny and well drawn fanart she posts for them!

4. @glitchysquidd I dont pop in as often as i used to, but glitchy's blog is one ive looked up to for a while. Here you can find very well written fnaf fics and fanart, chill energ(not to mention hilarious shenanigans),and a very unique and distinct artstyle.(seriously broski ive used your art for reference so many time 😭🤚🏽-). I suggest you guys head down to the basement and enjoy the tour.

5. @meatygutsy oh gee where do i even start- this blog has some of the most unique and well thought out ocs i think ive seen in a very long time. The artstyle here and style of coloring and shading is like nothing else. All of the colors pop and go together just right, not to mention the well fleshed out backstorys of each character.

6.@glaucus22 while this blog certainly isnt as active as it used to be, this is yet another artist that ive used as reference for countless times. They have a very distinct artstyle, and put much thought into their characters and their lore. I highly recommend going through the art tags here and taking a peek, along with a reblog or two!!!

7. @ijustwannahavefunn another blog with VERY well thought out and styled ocs, and a to die for artstyle. I also recommend checkjng out their youtube channel, which has VERY smooth animations and animatics. Definitely a hidden gem.

8. @vrnicky is a very good friend of mine that is WAY WAY WAY too unrecognized. They dont get NEARLY enough love for the anount of love and hard work they out into their characters and art. Please show em some love for me!!!

9. @loupy-mongoose is a favorite pokemon ary blog of mine. While you might find mostly mewtwo and mew stuff, please know that this is because of this creators mewtwo comic. You may know what im takling about if you know about similar more popular blogs (@/xxtc-96xx @/mewtwoandme and more ) but what separates this blog from many others is their very very different story, and an artstyle that'll put you at ease. Not to mention unique and well thought out mew and mewtwo designs.

And lastly, for now at least ,10. @whiteartblood an art blog that i havent visted in a couple months. This creator has some of the best undertale art i swear. One of my favorite styles!! A very lovely and instantly recognizable artstyle(that again, i have used for reference...i dont even know how many times), and even better ocs.

Now i know there are so many more blogs that are deserving of recognition, but its late and i cant look up 50 usernames at the moment.

However, while you are not obligated to, I sincerely hope you go show these guys some love(and reblogs!!!!!!!) For me. These guys have been a very big influence on my art, artists ive looked up to for YEARS now, and luckly for me some of them even being friends of mine, which im so very thankful for.

Ill definitely be making another post like this, with more writing inclusion and even more deeply hidden gems that require some digging.

I apologize for any typos that are unfortunately guaranteed as thats kind've what im known for lmao <- has made a fool of herself countless times) and i cant help but feel nervous that these talented people will see them, but know ive done the best ive can.

Thank you, and have a great time everyone!

#jeep.jeep #covencalls

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adanaac · 10 months

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Could I ask about your OC's? Specifically Ophicucus and Tsuru, I love how majestic Ophi is drawn and Tsuru fascinates me both with the concept and also how lovely you have illustrated him.

I hope you are well, and thank you again for helping me with my questions o7.

Sincerely HMAD.

oh good i get to talk about my son!!

my blorbo my beloved my babygirl he means everything to me

i made him in 2017 so hes sort of grown up with me (or i've grown up and realised things about him that i couldn't have when i was younger. i have so many complicated feelings abt this that i made a short comic about it last year)

to preface this im not a great writer dont expect good writing from me lol all i have is my personal experience and stealing tropes from stories i like

(got a lot to say so its all going under the cut. also a lot of death mention)

So. who is this dude

Tsuru (not his real name in-story, i havent come up with one im happy with), 18 years old, a ghost

he has a little sister, Ori, 15, who was meant to be my sona but then i just drew him more and like drawing him more anyway

first 2 drawings i ever did of him. he was based off natori natsume yuujinchou at this point, i dont remember why or if i even liked natori that much, but i remember distinctly hes based off him

u may have noticed he sort of looks older in my older art. this is because first of all art style drift lol but also as ive gotten older ive figured out that 18 isnt actually that old.

theres also a black haired version of him (two actually) its basically something like this ⬇️

important to know that everything about this dude is a convoluted metaphor

i lovingly summarize white tsuru as "people pleaser" and black tsuru as "nihilist prick" in my head and those are the things consistent throughout all the AU versions of him

(important differences only to me) alive tsuru doesnt act like black tsuru at all thats just his warped self perception (he also doesnt act exactly like white tsuru either)

also alive tsuru has black eyes and the shortest hair, black tsuru has blue eyes and slightly longer hair (also white tsuru is slightly taller than both of them)

if they all existed at the same time they would hate each other on sight but fortunately (unfortunately?) he is just 1 dude with issues

the general vibe is white tsuru is the "yippee floaty trickster" brand of ghost and black tsuru is the sort of ghost in horror media that stands just outside your field of view in the darkness dripping with blood

for the longest time only white haired tsuru was a "character", "black haired tsuru" existed just as his corpse at most, a footnote

but over the past 2 years ive figured that hes actually really fun to draw and play with, and in a different way than white tsuru

(wait fuck isnt this just abe trio. i do always almost accidentally draw tsuru when im trying to draw haruaki.... fuck.....)

(ive had tsuru for long enough that i just keep tacking details from my fav characters onto him.....)

halls smp

so ive been on this minecraft roleplay server called halls smp with other artists for the past 2 years, theres a new season of it every few months with a different theme each time to keep things fresh and ive just been making AU versions of tsuru for it so ive had a lot of opportunity to think about him

season 1 - halloween - jiangshi tsuru

this one is almost entirely unchanged from his base characterization because i didnt want to rp too much and also didnt know there would be future seasons at this point (also basically after the first day i gave up on being called "tsuru" bc its too hard to pronounce and everyone called me canada anyway)

same basic story, guy dies and theres now a white haired version of him (actually this is the same for all the AUs). in fact im pretty sure the black haired version of this one is exactly base alivetsuru. basically what ive been interested in exploring is different kinds of death, the events leading up to it, and what kind of person he becomes afterwards (but also in equal amounts im interested in making fun designs and playing minecraft and fucking around)

(this feels like the start of the beginners guide...)

i associate him with doves and at the time, tarot card 18: the moon, but in retrospect i now think he's card 0: the fool.

season 2 - winter - ishmael

guy who died at sea and eaten by a interdimensional whale and got isekaied. loosely conceptually based off moby dick, although i havent actually read it LOL but i did spend a week reading up on drowning and hypothermia

strangely, his death didnt create a white haired version of him, perhaps because he didnt have anything in life to give up his identity and replace it with. (and also remember the hair color doesnt actually mean dead/alive)

im only calling him ishmael now in retrospect, at the time he was just tsuru/canada

while designing him i had the biggest crisis bc i didnt want him to look to much like this old old oc i had (pic 1) but then i sucked it up and went with it anyway

i never got around to drawing it but his fingers are black from frostbite thats why he wears gloves all the time.

hes one of my favorite iterations of tsuru he looks so mad or upset all the time it makes me want to tease him, and also i think the grey skin and eyebags are very cute

i associate him with whales and tarot card 18: the moon

season 3 - golden grove - fox tsuru

honestly i think this is my favorite design of him i kinda popped off. i think im just a lot more comfortable working with warm colors. and also i associate white tsuru with foxes anyway (black tsuru is totally a catboy btw) (why is he not associated with cranes if his name is tsuru you ask?? bc cranes are hard to draw next question. he did start out based off cranes tbf, thats where the white hair and the tallness comes from)

dead fox possessing his dead human friend's body (although thats only the most literal interpretation of events; in all these iterations there's only ever been 1 person) the white tsurus are mostly interested in "moving on", whatever that means to each of them

btw my banner on this blog is him

hes sort of a set with s2 tsuru to me, mostly bc theyre the ideals that "white tsuru" and "black tsuru" hold taken to the extremes, and also theyre on opposite ends of the "hates people hates talking" and "loves to talk and mess with people" scale

anyway. hes tarot card 10: wheel of fortune to me

season 4 - wild west - mirage

the desert dragon, mirage. this is the season i started giving them actual names that arent "tsuru" and putting actual thought into the story lol previously it was just vibes-based character design. i have a short thing written about him thats meant to be the script for a comic, but i never got around to drawing it.

a sandworm-esque dragon that got tired of being a dragon and took up a passing witch's offer to give him a human form. this is all a metaphor i think. he has longer hair bc i wanted to spice things up a little

(also i consider this a form of death bc he left behind a giant sandworm/dragon skeleton somewhere in the desert)

the mirage-dragon thing comes from the shen 蜃 (which is used in the chinese word for mirage, 海市蜃楼 haishi shenlou, literally translating to "ocean city and shen's castle"). it's a clam-like dragon that produces foam that creates mirages over the ocean.

if u read "even if you slit my mouth", this is what the "shinkiro" or "shin" in recent chapters is. (i had one of those "smug because i already know all about the mythological creature a story is referencing" moments, which i also had with the four gods in yohaji bc i used to translate a game that mentioned them too)

isnt it romantic in a way? that the two places mirages are most known for happening are the ocean and the desert.

i dont have too much art of him because around this time i was uhhh (checks calendar) got back into yohaji and got consumed by it for a couple months lol (can u even blame me. it was july to september that was when like chapter 91 came out lol)

an earlier version of his design that i didnt end up using but i still really like this art

hes tarot card 9: the hermit to me

season 5 - fairytales/medieval - ophiuchus

NO FUCKING WAY YOURE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE THIS for this one i actually ironed out what kind of people the black haired and white haired versions of him are. and also specifically this one isnt black tsuru but alive tsuru

i have a short poem thing about him, to summarize its like so many other fairytales about grateful animals granting their saviors something, but it doesnt end well for anyone

hes based off ophiuchus and asclepius of course, but also a lot of other snake stories in general, like the lindwurm and baishezhuan

to reiterate, for none of these stories do i consider there to ever actually have been 2 separate people, its always just 1 fucked up guy

i also sort of consider him to be a set with mirage, for both being serpents, and also for being "black tsuru whose personality is like white tsuru" and "white tsuru whose personality is like black tsuru", thereby codifying for myself that to him, someone who's stuck in his own head a lot, what matters most to him is his ideals, what all his actions are in pursuit of

he's tarot card 12: the hanged man to me

bonus: dnd character - alba

i also have a version of him i play for dnd, named alba to match with my party who all have color themed names. a halfling ranger who's very small and very loud. except he has amnesia and cant remember anything from before he was 12 (hes around 18 now according to him), including that he's actually a changeling who just transformed into a halfling to seem older than he is to work at a bar and nearly died in a bar fight.

(if you spend as much time fretting over semantics as me, you may note that changelings are medium sized and cannot transform into halflings which are small sized, for which my explanation is that he's been in halfling form since he was a kid, and after the amnesia he thought he actually was a halfling. this is also why his hair is white btw bc changelings have white hair. pre-amnesia in his "actual" halfling transformation he had black hair. i care too much about semantics but hey isnt dnd the semantics game anyway?)

anyway congrats alba for being the only version of tsuru that hasn't outright "died"!! if only because dnd has actual rules and i can't pull my usual death-ghost nonsense as easily!!!

hes very ship of theseus to me, all versions of him are. what makes up a person? what defines them? is it their face, their appearance, their name? their personality, their memories, their ideals? if you slowly replace each of those, one at a time, with a copy thats very similar to the original, at what point are you a different person?

as thanks for reading all of this i'll reveal what some of the metaphors are, the core of who tsuru, as a character, is to me. maybe this is fairly obvious, but all the death and personality weirdness stuff is a convoluted metaphor for depression and autism, as well as the experience of reading the things you've written years ago, seeing old photos and others talking about who you were years ago and finding that person wholly unfamiliar, that you understand the thought process of that person no more than you would a stranger's, as a result of having taken apart your identity and replaced it piece by piece with things from people you like more than yourself.

im always scared of scrutinizing tsuru too hard because he's just a weird reflection of myself, and i think i'll only be able to write a version of him thats more of a "whole person" once i figure that out for myself. the only way you see your own reflection is through a mirror after all, a flattened 2D surface.

haha this got kinda weird and depressing and personal at the end (mostly bc ive been writing this in the middle of the night, its now 4am)

after seeing my soul laid bare like this, if theres one takeaway, i think its pretty obvious why i'm so enamored by the parts of yohaji that i talk about often (huh wasnt this a post about my oc why did it become about yohaji)

oh yeah i just realised u probably also wanted to hear more about my yohaji version of tsuru specifically. honestly theres not really more to it i just like drawing him in situations. like of course the same themes apply but i just like drawing this dude thats 90% the reason hes my sona. like heres a pokemon au of him i drew recently bc i wanted to draw them as kids and also as pokemon gijinkas

anyway thats all. not really bc i could go on and on about him but this is way too long and also way too personal at this point. i think about him a disproportionate amount, i only have 2 other ocs i remotely care about and the extent of my thoughts for those guys is "i think hes fun 👍"

this has probably also been like, the 3rd most comprehensive description of tsuru that ive made, 1st being the thoughts in my head and 2nd being the past 5 years worth of DMs with my friend who i talk about tsuru with

(why was this sort of structured like the beginners guide. if youve seen the beginners guide tell me if im right or delusional. if u havent, go watch a playthrough of it, have an existential crisis, and then afterwards tell me)

#canada art #canada ocs #this hit the 30 image per post limit lmaoo

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spamgyu · 21 hours

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Hi love,

Alright, I'll start off with this, the wonwoo fluff, girl, I hope you know that good fluff IS about the most mundane things and yeah, you got me all giggly while reading this one, so I'd say you're fucking good at writing fluff( as if your pretty boy series isn't enough proof of that).

Next, the Alex Kwon update, it's absolutely hilarious, but the way I can totally see this happening, like, alex having to pay them to stay away from Alex!yn and telling her they're all red flags. Also, Andrew, Sam and Chris not being on his close friends, loll, girl I was laughing reading them complain. The cutest thing though, the Alex or alex✨️ was so adorable and I loved the update, it felt like early compensation for the pain you're about to put us through with the hoshi idol angst.

Now, minghao with lv, god I've been wanting to see this happen for so long but oh god, ge looked so gooooood. Seeing him Jackson makes me so happy, I love seeing the members interact with their friends. You see, I have quite a weird connection, I started off as a bts and blackpink fan, got to know Jackson through namjoon and then svt through jungkook, so watching all these groups interact is like my source of happiness. When I tell you, I was over the moon seeing lisa and mingyu interact, they're absolutely hilarious, the way gyu looked so done with her while she seemed to have the time of her life annoying him. Sorry, I got distracted, the whole point is Hao looked absolutely fucking amazing in that denim on denim look.

Okay, I see people talking about how they can't afford to stan more then one group, and I totally get that, like I have serious brainrot because of stanning more than one group(can't say I regret it though). To give you an idea of how deep my brainrot runs, I stan 5 groups, 4 boy bands and 1 girl group. When I tell you that I'm rotting, I mean I genuinely am, because just one grp is enough to drive someone crazy and yet, I choose to do so with 5 groups. The fact that I started off as a cubic doesn't help my case either, because I was instantly drawn to these 13 men being unhinged. It's been years and I still haven't gotten used to this, and to be quite honest, idk if I ever will.

As for disconnected calls part 2, umm, I would actually love you even more if it was angst(just a personal opinion) but like, I can't guarantee I'll be alive to tell you how much I love it, because, well, cheol angst is one of my weaknesses, I can't say I've fully recovered from the pain from the 1st part and the apartment we don't share.

Anyway, how have you been?

hi omg – wow im so late replying buuuut

thank u i KDNWKD i think i think too much about fluff bc ??? idk ?? i hate cheesy things and i feel like people wont like what i think is cute so then i never actually go through with it but AHHH THANK U

alex kwon just dont want the boys annoying him in the gc bc lbr the guys wont ever comment or swipe up on Alex!yn bc like theyre dumb but theyre not pigs... anyways its alex's way of not wanting to show his lover boy side to the boys

i loooveeddd the denim look sm and i loooove when we get svt interactions with other idols (imo it humanizes them) anywaysss

KFNENF yeah i stan multiple groups and im mostly casual stan for all but svt (but tbh some carats may think im casual for svt bc i dont really go crazy with purchasing merch) anyways now that it's concert season my pockets are HURTING

LASTLY disconnected calls pt2 will be angst and maybe equally as painful as the apartment we wont share....... i havent fully written out ehe BUT NOTED

also i am.......... okay ish.... work is.... work and i am ....... surviving lmfaoooo

#spamasks

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fairy-switchblade · 3 months

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sorry if youve addressed this and i havent found it yet, but i was reading your post about stone butches transitioning out of stone. i am a femme coming to terms with the possibility i may be a stone femme and i was just wanting to hear others thoughts about what transitioning in and out of a stone femme identity might be like. maybe this doesnt make sense and im overthinking my identity somehow since im already thinking in terms of leaving it before ive even accepted it. as i am now i dont have any reservations about accepting the identity of stone besides somehow hurting or misrepresenting the community by viewing it this way. i wouldnt want to rush leaving stone behind either your post just sparked me to think long term what i may feel and be like. sorry this was probably unreadable, thank you for reading anyway if you did! it was nice to even write it somewhere at all. thank you 🙏 🩷

Hey there! Sorry about the late reply, it’s been an intense few days at work placement.

First of all, no I have not addressed this yet, there’s no need to apologise. The idea of ‘transitioning’ in and out of stone identity, either butch or femme, is an interesting one. It’s a way of acknowledging that accepting and taking on of this label is a process that takes time, as is the release of that same label.

I believe this is a fairly unique process to each of us, as individuals. Heads up I am not stone, but I am partnered to someone who is currently negotiating with their own use of the term. Much of what I can share on this is based on discussion with them, and is drawn therefore from a stone butch experience, not a stone femme experience. I would strongly recommend you reach out to other stone femmes for further support, if you feel confident doing so.

That being said, I feel that considering the ‘lifespan’ of your own stone identity is not an unreasonable thing to consider. This is something which you may feel differently on at different points in your life. It is important to extend compassion to yourself, not judgement, as you navigate this. Some people might arrive at stone identity feeling soothed by it, and more secure within it, more able to function, or be themselves. Other’s will arrive at it with mixed feelings- there is self-knowledge and empowerment in the term, and yet also for some, exhaustion and hurt, and a need to rely on it temporarily. You will know in yourself whether stone feels like a temporary shelter, or home. It is okay if it’s home. I feel like I can’t really stress that enough.

You can know in yourself that you might want to leave stone behind one day, even as you are just embracing the term. It would hurt if you were discussing stone as something that can be ‘cured’ or something that’s wrong with you that you need to get rid of. But it seems clear to me that is not what you’re doing.

I’m really glad you were able to share these thoughts with me. I hope they provided some release, and I sincerely hope my prior post was helpful to you. Good luck with everything, and remember to take your time figuring all of this out.

#Stone #stone femme #asks #anon

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meikostan · 1 year

Text

OK finally watching oshi no ko anime, it turns out all i needed was to go outside for like an hour and im normal again

my thoughts under the cut (writing as i watch) (long) (lots of thoughts) (beautiful and true?) (manga reader) (don't read if anime only) (spoilers) (seriously) (i talk alot) (lots of thoughts)

at this point i've reread oshi no ko enough times that even if i didnt already know japanese i could probably make it without the subs SDJLF but its so cool to see lines and panels that im so familiar with brought to life!! i also liked goro's death scene, especially the way they used static and cut between shots. i keep on pulling out my physical copies of onk (well mostly vol 1) and pointing at my screen and the corresponding part of the book like

2. AIIIII little known fact about me is that ai is genuinely my favorite character... WHICH SUCKS BECAUSE SHE DIES IN THE FIRST VOLUME. seriously we only ever get to see her after this when a. her name or demeanor is invoked by another character b. aqua has his numerous mental breakdowns or c. flashbacks (including but not limited to aqua's mental breakdowns). i am always down for ai content!!!

3. its so much easier to ignore the weird vaguely sexual stuff from their babyhood because i know the rest of the series is normal and cool and not into that sort of stuff👍

4. speaking of normal yayayay it's aqua back when he was actually normal and not "normal" :D like he is just a baby. do you think now that oshi no ko is popular people will get into internet arguments about whether you can ethically have aqua as your favorite character post-normalification. actually wait this may already have been happening in the dark depths of some discord server out there.. but i dont use discord so im blissfully unaware

5. OH i dont think ive seen all of the OG b komachi before? or at least not in high detail. epic!

6. infant ruby telling people on the internet "kys" before age 2... truly a model twitter user

7. not gonna lie i havent really ever liked the way babies are drawn here (including manga)... idk their heads just look way too big like adult heads drawn on toddler bodies then ""cutified"". but this is a personal gripe

8. do you think because of infantile amnesia the twins forgot about the whole pretending to be amaterasu moment. do you think miyako still remembers. can you imagine being the foster mother of two kids who you believe to be gods sent to earth. do you think she remembers that she was "charged by the gods with keeping ai's secret" and then aqua. you know.

9. imagine: you married the ceo of a mid production company because you want to date hot men. there are no hot men in sight. you have to watch over one of the idol's twin infant babies. they reveal to you that they are divine messengers of god and also they can speak normally. there are no hot men in sight. you tend to their every need because you don't want divine retribution. you explain the intricacies of the idol industry in detail every couple of days when they complain about the injustices of the world. there are no hot men in sight. you become their foster mom after they witness the traumatic death of their mother, whose secrets you where charged with keeping safe. at least 12 years pass. they never mention any of this again. you manage the idol group one of them is in. there are still no hot men in sight. your name is miyako. every day you wake up.

10. i like how gotanda gives his business card to a toddler. whats he gonna do, call you on his fisher price dial phone? well actually nevermind aqua is probably the only other toddler (alongside ruby) who could make use of a business card

11. KANAA LETS FUCKING GOOOOO but also nothing will ever top 'lick a lying snitch/flick a crying switch'...... nothing ever... :( also taking the opportunity now to say ive always found it hilarious she assumed 'aqua' is his stage name and not his actual legal name, that's how ridiculous it is DSKLFJ

12. sobbing at the ruby ai dance... dont even have that many words i just really like it.. do you guys think ai was thinking about her own mom [& abuse/lack of relationship thereof]? not even just in this scene but in her more serious moments when she's thinking about her kids it's like "i want to make millions so they can go to the nicest schools and have the nicest things" "i want my daughter to dance freely and happily and i will support her in this" which ig can also be excused as 'thats just what a normal parent wants' but idk i like taking into consideration her own past and lack of parental support when looking at the way she tries to raise her children (not that she exactly got a chance to, even while still alive)

13. also i realized at this point that ep 1 is like an hour long not just because of the whole 'we gotta make sure no one drops this before the reveal that shows what this story's actually gonna be about', but also because it would be kinda awkward to have cut any of these scenes out? or not like out completely but like from each other. like if we had ended ep 1 at for example where they do their silly baby dance and go twitter viral (chapter 5 aka the midpoint of vol 1). that wouldve been terrible. but we can't cut it any earlier, or any later. ai's death feels like the natural conclusion to this problem. also i can't really see much of the other sections being stretched out to fit a full episode length being done very well. having ep 1 be a full 90 minutes lets them be as long as they need to be, aka a 1:1 adaptation of the manga.

14. oh boy chapter 9 time

15. i don't have anything to say about ai's outlook that has not already been said but this is the scene that made her my favorite character. not being able to tell at what point your lies become reality.. not really knowing if you've ever loved or been loved truly because your entire concept of 'love' was based off insincerity necessary for survival.. and now not ever being given the chance to explore what 'real love' means to you. FUCK

16. aww i love all these little family moments they added! very cute ^_^

17. yayy go kids get traumatized ^_^ also for some reason i remember the stalker as having really light hair o-0 fascinating. i remembered his name though!! just like ai fr

18. speaking of hair i also did not realize saitou was blond i thought he had brown hair..

19. hey the bandana (? i forget the word) guy holding the ai fan sign during the news montage is from one of the intros to the vol 1 chapters where hes like 'oh yeah i wonder where those dancing babies are now'!

20. another part of that montage shows a house with a wii in it, which came out november 19 2006. characters are shown using twitter which started earlier that same year; it was a pretty popular website even in 2008, but the mobile app only became a thing in like 2010. i'm seeing a mix of flip phones and smart phones so this has gotta take place sometime around 2010. it's kinda difficult to tell exactly what age the twins are in the main story because like the first page of vol 2 has ruby listing her age as 14, but - and the proof is not at my finger tips rn - i swear to god they're like 16 at this point. i have legitimate reasons to believe this but i need to grab exact proof adding to that we also have 15 years of lies, which if im remembering right would be referring to the twins age? i was trying to logic out exactly what year oshi no ko takes place in even though i already know the answer is 'in the modern day' but anyway yeah i'll just finish my episode and move on

21. THE IPHONE RUBY IS HOLDNIG HAS A HEADPHONE JACK. i want so badly to say that's an iphone 4 but there's like a separation between that and the power button. i also dont have an iphone 4 with me so i cant check it irl :( but anyway the iphone 4 was released in 2010, meaning the evidence is piling up for this part of the story taking place some time around 2010. or maybe i'm looking too deeply into this and should go back to actually watching the episode.

22. this is reminding me i was gonna write a fic specifically about this time period where the twins go to therapy and have to adjust to life without ai, having miyako graduate from fake mom to actual mom, aqua faking being fully recovered from the incident so he'd be released from therapy (fic concept was inspired from him stating this in like vol 6), etc. i never did because i spent like 3 hours researching play therapy and never got anywhere with it.. but maybe...

23. THE KIDS HAVING TO WATCH HER FUNERAL THROUGH THE FUCKING CAR WINDOW... I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF

24. YESS AQUA NORMALIFICATION COMPLETE

25. AM I INSANE OR IS THAT AKANE? HER HAIR COLOR IS THE SAME BUT IT'S SO SHORT

26. MEM!!!!

27. AHHH POST CREDITS AI MAKING HER VIDEO FOR THE TWINS "i don't think i'll still be an idol by then" YEAH BUT AT WHAT COST 😭

FINAL THOUGHTS: i liked it alot ^_^ i dont really watch that much anime anymore (not that i watched an incredible amount before, but i am familiar with it) but i really liked this. i think they did a very good job of adapting the first volume! i know the rest of the episodes will be not-film length which does make me a bit sad because i think it would work out well, or at least not badly, if they were. it does also make me really excited for the future, seriously i will actually explode when i see the theater arc in full. cannot wait to see aqua mental breakdowns and ruby evil arc and and and and

the only thing i would've liked is if they could somehow have found a way to incorporate the pre-chapter intro scenes from the manga where they're talking about 15 years of lies, interviews with their pre-school teacher, etc. though both the pre-school teacher and the aforementioned bandana guy appear which may have been their way of doing it? like adding a fun detail for obsessives like myself to point at like 'my god it's those guys from exactly 2 panels in the manga'

tumblr ate my post and erased everything up to #2 while i was writing it and i was about to flip but it turns out that it automatically saves posts while youre writing them now and it was in my drafts safe and sound soooo crisis averted ^_^ anyway those were my thoughts on ep 1

#oshi no ko #animanga

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moochio7 · 8 months

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can we get more coach content ?? :D

teared up seeing this in my inbox /pos

get ready for way too many words...

I never had any ocs that stuck around before making coach for the stupidest crack fic with my friends,, so idrk how this is supposed to work but whatever. He isn't a very nuanced character yet, but he'll get there eventually.

on the google doc for planning False-hearted (the insane crack fic) this is what was written for coach a while back

"Coach: (deals with some behind the scene shit and plans “plays” to do in battle) {Boss Man} He plans plays for battle but also is in battle observing and making plans on the spot- like we all have radios and hes armed creepin around being like oooooo we got an abandoned sentry ill get that which opens up a space for someone else to come in and yada yada u get the idea (long story short i'm specifying that he gets a gun and gets to be in battle cause teehee silly) YOOOO HE CAN LIKE TRAIN THE MERCS N SHIT BY ANALYSIZING THEIR SKILLS IN BATTLE AND SEEING WHAT TGET CAN WORK OJ AND RAAGGHH cuz they got that training gym area right? coach the personal trainer lol"

Also have I mentioned its a self-insert? I think I may have just said oc but no yeah this guy is just me.

in terms of who this guy is, he gets along well with pretty much everyone, bullies scout like a brother a lot tho. no hard feelings ofc. since a very young age he had a lot of pressure and responsibility dropped on him, so while he is immature and messing around sometimes, he is wary of being too obnoxious, is never vulnerable with others, and puts up this false rigid cool leader guy persona. For now at least.

He may not talk to others about his emotions or whats going on with him, but he doesnt just bottle it up and never think about it. Hes got an over analytical brain and has looked into every single thing hes ever done or said and seems to truly understand so very much about himself. Hes knows the issues he has but cant bring himself to fix them because that takes being vulnerable and brave. Some things he cant be. He appears brave to others in your typical "do whatever it takes to help others and jump into action without worry" way tho.

In terms of backstory and what growing up was like? I havent decided yet lol

theres some older posts on my page under the false-hearted tag to (maybe???) give you more context of the strange world this guy is in.

heres pretty much every time ive drawn coach 👍👍im still working on figuring out his exact features so theyre pretty inconsistent.

quick sketch n colour

this one is inspired but an amazing song "La guerra di Piero" by Fabrizio De André

another sketch, and some images i cooked up for sending as reaction images to friends. (Coach brutally killing Blu scout with scouts own bat, and then coach being the innocent kid he is)

#ty so so so much for asking this #and sorry if this makes no sense #i mean he was created to be a character in smth that makes no sense sooo #tf2 #false-hearted #moochiposts #my art

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mikoriin · 9 months

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draw your other ocs: crissiana and kmiko wearing 2000s fashion with heart sunglasses

the fact that u know who these two ocs of mine are because i havent posted about them in a REALLY long time but!!! i do have some good news for you anon!

so crissi and kimi are from an ancient story my childhood best friend and i worked on back in middle school. we've revamped the story countless times over and over again and we were never satisfied. its been ESCC, With Love, and now its...something new again!!

here's their newest designs i just did the other night! these are just rough sketches of their basic looks. i plan on copying the silhouettes to put clothes on them for a reference for style. may do a couple examples actually. but either way here they are!

kimiko is now Kammeron (Kammie for short) because she is no longer strictly japanese, but white-japanese mixed. Crissiana is not hispanic anymore but rather a mixed girl. theyve been aged back down to high school age simply because the story we want to tell is kind of a fun, comedy, coming of age thing. its actually a...IDOL BAND STORY NOW! :D here's 5 out of 6 of the main cast so far:

we got kammi and crissi who are virtually the same as theyve always been, same for lucas and reilly, (aka rei), but this time theyre back to being twins! and abbigail, aka abbi, our wonderful little church singer! shes got a lot of powerful vocals in that tiny body. the only one missing from this group sketch is her twin brother antwan, but he will be drawn next :3

kammie, crissi, and abbi are all in a girl group together led by kammie. there's two more people in the group but they havent been designed fully yet. we have a picture in our minds, but no concrete drawing down yet (bc u see, im the artist and my bestie is the writer :3) but its been so fun so far to work on this in private with her, so if yall are interested just based on this post, then u will definitely be seeing more of it from me.

#doots #ocs #wip #concept art

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freezeriafan · 1 year

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Johnny anon here! Fortunately other characters I have brainrot for include robby and timm so, have you got some Robby headcanons?

ROBBY!!!

- He is Allan's intermittent roommate in Allan's tastyville ranch style house. I think this may have come from in the first papa louie platformer they were roommates BUT I THINK THAT ACTUALLY It was Allan and Taylor who were roommates becasue I remember drawing things on my whitebaord about that (Allan and Taylor were roommates for a while before Taylor and Chuck became roommates and I have headcanons about that but they're brief but now is not the time) BUT that was a long time ago and I havent looked it up in a while so. I dont know. I dont know why I wanted Allan amd Robby to be roommates. I dont rememebr what connection those characters have, but I see them paired together as a duo a lot in fanart, so whatever it is, it's not just me. And I dont know why I decided that Allan has moved out of the apartments and into a ranch style house. I have no clue where that came from

- Robby is out in the ocean for long periods of time but sometimes he gets shore leave /is in for the season, and when that happens Allan wakes up and finds his kitchen a mess and Robby on the couch. With the window broken in

- Robby keeps forgetting that Allan leaves a key for him under the welcome mat. Allan suggests that maybe Robby keep a key on him when hes out, and Robby says that the ocean is a ravenous mistress, who holds herself in no fault and no blame, carrying a necessary self-righteousness, who has stolen too many things from him already. So hes not interested in risking that.

- They're friends IDK they're bros. They eat poptarts together. Robby tells him ocean stories that are exaggerated / made up / just straight up myths and tales that have been passed down.

- Robby experiences what he dubs "ocean madness" which between you and me is bipolar disorder (extreme troughs and crests, he feels like the Mother Mar owns his soul, everybody serves somebody and he is a patron of the sea foam spawn Aphrodite, on various levels he sees within himself a lost soul, a loyal servant, a beast, a mermaid, etc)

- in his flipdeck it says that he first got a job on a shrimp boat in order to pay his rent becasue he spent all of his money on pizza. This occured during a hypomanic episode, the one thing I cant explain is how he managed to eat all that pizza with a muted appetite but I know he blew all of his money in the upcoming throws of mania.

- Then he got shipwrecked on an island for 3 years and HE WAS NEVER THE SAME!!! Now hes a boat dude. He knows pirate lingo. On that island all of the madness came together into a unified philosophy and he left it knowing deeply and intimately who the ocean is and how he is intertwined with her, shes a capricious deity and his happening upon the deckhand job was a matter of fate.

- He met Allan after returning to Tastyville after being a closer on Freezeria. The story goes that Robby was drawn to the lights of the Hockey Stadium like a moth, was denied entry, fell asleep in a nearby dumpster, and after the game Allan was walking out with his teammates and they were discussing pizza plans. Robby woke up when he heard "pizza" so he clambers out and lands on two feet and Allan, who sometimes talks to bums and hobos for fun on the streets of Oniontown, says "Howdy!" And then they get pizza.

- Robby ... he will give you good solid advice ... but it just sucks sometimes becasue of how stony it can be ... it's not always applicable ... he tends to jump the gun on assumptions... hes like "ay... Allan... I loathe to see you break your heart on this siren .... you're much too good for this dastardly world... me advice is to run free ... break from the wench's chains before it's too late..." and Allan is like "I'm not dating her or anythign but she left her xbox here I'm just asking you if you can give it to her if she comes by asking for it? I'll for sure keep that all in mind though. You're very wise Robby."

- "We all got a little fruit in us." <- Robby quote

- "Ay, yer milkers be ridiculous, miss" <- Robby quote

- hes feels very tender about Allan TBH like hes never had a friend like that. And he feels like Allan is too good and too pure for this world and secretly he believes that he hinself is too maligned and bastardly and rotten and mad-stricken for Allan ... but Allan is in fact his equal age and he in fact knows the rough-and-tumble of life and yes hes got a tenacious and optimistic heart and it's just comical the way that Robby gets drunk and sentimental sometimes and he languishes on the couch and mutters things like "Oy the curse of the killer whale .. he cannae change his nature .. oy the scorpion and the frog ... he cannae change his nature ... if he knew best he would stay away from the frog lest they both perish ... oy the scorpion must stay out of sight of Hercules in the sky.. lest we see the most tender hero fall .." and Allan is in the kitchen in his boxers calling over his shoulder "Did you say strawberry poptart or smores I dont remember"

- the dynamic is sometimes that Robby is burned and rotten and wisened so he'll stand like a proper captain (hes a deckhand) and call Allan "boy" or "son" (but not "kid" becasue that implies distance and disrespect) as a nod to Allan's purity and innocence of heart, but other times at weird hours and when life gets strange he'll call him "love" and paw at his chest like a damsel and he may beg for forgiveness for things he hasnt done and cant help, though he deosnt believe that people can change which gods and forces of nature and stars and philosophies control their undercurrents, he can still apologize as a conscious man out of his own prerogative. And again Allan comes across as ditzy sometimes and he does have a sweet forgiving heart but obviously hes seen the dirty alleys of life and he knows the art of self-preservation. And hes also very transparent, and he is impervious to whatever layers of life Robby is on. So again it's like Robby is waxing poetic about beauty and the beast while Allan is just some guy who eats pizza and plays hockey like .... hes chill. IS THIS MAKING SENSE? I know that Robby's Venus is in like... Pisces or Cancer or something.

-Allan looks up to him and thinks hes wise. He also knows seamlessly what his faults are and through his own lense it's sympathetic and considerate, rather than self-burning and dramatic like how Robby tends to paint his flaws. Robby isnt self-deprecating by nature but he is fiercely introspective (water signs) and he perceives seas when there are only ponds. Allan hates to see him rot on his couch during a trough and Robby isnt around much during a crest and Allan just thinks that that's just his personality like it's fine. Robby thinks very tenderly of Allan and holds the lad in high regard, I think on some level seeing hinself in him, the seperation of beauty from the beast, the days when he was a normal Tastyville lad before the ocean stole him. Yeah I think Robby has some identity issues deep down. Hes taken on this persona becasue he feels it's all that's left of him and is what he deserves. He mourns what hes lost and his only solace is the ocean within and out of him, a higher power who plays him and whom hes meant to serve. Hes kind of like a mermaid. On some level he keeps himself away from Allan to keep him safe from the wickedness within and in other ways he cant help but to rely on him. All happening within him BTW becasue again to Allan it's very simple. They're bros. 🤜🤛 🤝

- the only songs on my Robby playlist are "G.U.Y." by Lady Gaga and "FROOT" by Marina.

- in Transfem Allan AU Robby is of course supportive like it's nothing but ... the way he feels about women and the way he feels about men is different .... but he and Allan are already bonded ... and my personal headcanon is that it's not transfem like "woman" it's transfem like "nonbinary and female aligned" and I think that Allan (Jacklyn if you will but she'll respond to both she doesnt give a shit) would have a very colorful and interesting way to explain that and Robby would think that it's beautiful and is the only thing that's made sense since the earth was pure ocean. He has a drag queen locked inside of him (a pearl locked in a shell) so I wonder if that plays into his perception of it, something about the mistress majesty of the ocean fair and her eternal dance with the Lady Luna and the active hot pink of ferocious sharks and desperate mermaids ............................. yknow

- I wish I knew anything at all about ships and ship culture from fucking any era and pirate lingo and stuff like that. Then I could really spin you a story

Maybe I should post the section of my old unfinished papa louie fanfiction that was about Robby and Allan... good way to procrastinate methinks .

THANSK YOU!!!!

#allan #robby

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commander-gloryforge · 2 years

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I really like Jue, and their armour and colour scheme, and that big hammer. Tell me more about them. I know you said they're a work in progress, but I want to see more photos and hear more.

thank you sm for asking about jue omg! theyre very dear to me since ive had them for a looong long time <3

ive got their story down relatively well, though their personality isnt the most consistent yet and there are a bunch of things here and there i havent really figured out </3

jue basically was disowned by their own family for not being able to use magic like the rest of the family did, and instead turned to become a scientist. but i guess mixing various toxic chemicals, a love for explosions and hatred for the family that one was abandoned by can create an interesting personality, and certainly a lack of morality.

jue is technically of krytan nobility, born as julia flame. the flame family has fire running through their veins, quite literally. theyre a family of pyromancers, controlling the element of fire, some of them even having power over all elements, making them elementalists.

not jue though. they werent born with all that arcane magic (unlike their older sister, whos probably one of the most skilled elementalists of the family), they werent born with... any kind of magical knowlege. no matter how much her family tried to teach fire spells, or any magic for that matter, jue just couldnt do it.

so, the second child of the flame family was forgotten. in secret, jue was given to another "family member", an aunt of jue that had met a similar fate, though instead of not being able to ever learn any magic, she had become a necromancer instead (what a scandal!). jues aunt was bitter towards her former "family", but loving to her new child. violett, their bigger sister, would still visit them in secret, playing with them, bringing expensive gifts. it was a loving relationship between them that would however fade as the two grew older, and violetts visits stopped.

jue may not have inherited the fire magic of her family, but certainly the fascination of flames. jue didnt need magic to play with fire. they became an inventor, engineer, scientist. jue, still under the name of julia at that time, left home at a young age to see more, the grand things tyria had to offer. they were drawn to asura tech, all those floaty cubes with funky colours, flashy alchemy and golems that listened to their owners every word, it drew her in. but shed soon find it to be a bit boring. they needed more kaboom. the charr had that needed kaboom. war machines, tanks, flamethrowers. jue liked the big things.

it was probably in the middle of their big search for more explosives throughout tyria that scarlet began terrorizing the world. oh scarlet. she was crazy, sure, dangerous, absolutely, a danger to the world, yes. jue didnt like all that much her. but they couldnt help but idolize her nonetheless. the descend into madness had started.

"julia" became "jue", to create more distance between them and that damned "family". violett was long forgotten, after all, vi didnt seem to care. jue collected more weapons. favoured was anything that could create explosions, fire, sparkly colourful lights. making elixirs became a great passion of jue, and an even greater passion was testing them on unsuspecting subjects.

but between all that sparkly glitzy alchemy, their trusty hammer remained jues favourite. why? well, because it killed instantly, and it killed properly. there was nothing technical about it. just pure violence. one would wonder how killing because fire and explosions are pretty turned into killing for the sake of killing. who knows. jue certainly doesnt. she doesnt think about that though. they just do what they want, and they just so happen to want to smash peoples skulls. maybe its just fun to do.

after all, to jue, everything is about fun. fire is fun. alchemy is fun. murder is fun!

my hand slipped and now here a post longer than anticipated! i wish i could simply stop talking sometimes.

like many of my characters, i kind of dont know what jue did during more recent events. they do spiral into evilness more and more though, and go so far that even violett snaps out of her little disney villain phase to try and save jue (or save tyria from jue, who knows)

its hard for me to portray them just the way i want: unhinged, not giving a shit about other lives, and obsessed with the beauty of destruction. as long as i havent figured out more about her, i also struggle giving them a proper outfit, which is why they run around in the scientist outfit for now!

some more screens of them! one of these is another old pic from 2017 and the other is the skins theyre wearing rn under that outfit

i do rly want to get back to that pink and blue colour scheme i used to have for her but also im obsessed with the purple hair <3

thank you again for asking and also thank you for reading my brainrot if youve made it this far <3 <3

#dio answers #guild wars 2 #gw2 #dios ocs #gw2 oc #thats a temporary tag until ive figured out what shell go by #demolisher jue

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cariseca · 2 years

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Tintin and Haddock for the character opinion thing

A little long to my tastes, heres a readmore

Tintin! tried to give him eyeballs but gave up bc he looked like an illumation entretainment background character lol

He looks. Terrible. I havent drawn him years

ALMOST BINGO'D

wasted potential: I just think if hergé hadnt been a weirdo catholic on a mission, tintin would've been more interesting and have more emotional depth even if it is clear he has some underlying personal issues it is never actually Seen bc he's suppossed to be the paragon of virtue and strenght and all that. I havent read the comics in years so i may be wrong but that was my impression then and thats my impression now

not as deep as they seem: honestly! i can see where everyones coming from bc obviously a kid going around and doing whats correct on impulse or trying to decipher mysteries etc is bound to have some trauma but he rlly isnt all that in canon. He's just a Good and Strong and Pure Catholic Boy :))))) (rage)

nothing i like about them is technically canon: yes and no. I will admit theres some aspects of canon tintin that make him likeable like hurrying to help or being pretty reckless, but it's more about the implications i can come up with??

why do they look like that: im joking i know why they look like that but still. He looks so bland in comparison to the rest of the cast....

they work better as part of a dynamic: HONESTLY you can make him interact with any character in the series and there will be a fun back and forth, even with snowy it's funny/sweet how they interact with each other. Tintin rlly needs the other characters to actually shine bc to me he's kinda bland, like theres a wall and theres nothing that bounces back against him if his family or friends arent there

they got too much screentime: im joking BUT this isnt even exclusive to the story hes in i mean like theres too much of him around and i find him kinda overhyped and overrated sdsfsdsdsfsf no offense to ppl who like him im just like "i want that kid obliterated"

i actively dislike them sorry: SORRY sdfsdfdf it's so bland to say but i think im just soured about the work itself and its transformative works featuring him! nothing against the fans whenever i see his face im like "him? again?"

Free Space: the tibet adventure could easily be an adventure/romance movie like just thinking of the implications of dreaming of someone u havent seen in a long while and going by your gut that they are in danger... IT EATS ME how dedicated tintin is to his friendships in general but i will always think him and chang would develope something more.... (sighs) young love (cries)

Haddock! I just drew him from memory too

Now I didnt score but heres a little explanation to each space:

they are soooo cool looking: I just really like how hes so scruffy looking and has that blue/black color scheme is very simple but effective :) i also just like sea themed characters in general and middle aged characters with Issues:tm:

everyone but me is wrong about them <3: NOT really true im just thinking of common mischaracterizations i used to see or seen in bad fanfiction bc otherwise i think theres a lot of ppl that really "get" haddock's essence

if they were real i would be afraid of them: half true, i would be more irritated by him than afraid of him. Like shut your mouth old man! type of way

they are like a blorbo to me: for a long time haddock was a blorbo to me, im not tht attached to the character anymore but i do think of him fondly

not as deep as they seem: i had to repeat this to myself bc even if he is plenty fleshed out in the actual works i think as fans we see More than there actually is.

free space: pretty sure ive said this before but i will always see haddock's personal journey as healing from the abusive rship he had with Alan Thompson (which was a catalyst to substance abuse) and seeing value in himself bc the people around him value him (his cat, tintin, prof calculus) basically that found family goodness lol

#tysm!#ask #archibald haddock #tintin

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kendev · 1 year

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⋆｡°✩ dev log 03 ✩°｡⋆

updates and general rambling under the cut!-

ok. havent updated in a bit but talking to myself. yeah. im very good at that. reminder that there's no rush to progress and things take time first of all Carly!

but anyways. first!) i've gotten a lot more character designs and motivations fleshed out but i can admit some routes definitely have a bit more poored into them than others atm and thats something im trying to fix. not force. just... add a lil something more yknow. bcuz there ARE many pieces of media like that where you can tell that a creator just had more care for one thing than the other and I dont at any point want to come across that way bcuz i do genuinely love all these characters, and I think they each deserve to be enjoyed and loved by someone that isnt just me! so I want other ppl to feel the love as well through ALL routes! not just a "Oh you can tell these handful of characters are the creators faves" So essentially not favoring certain kids over others like good parents would lol

secondly) I've started properly separating routes in different documents... lol. I'll be honest I had EVERYTHING. and i mean EVERYTHING all stored in one document. Names, notes on things, character bgs, clothing inspo AND the actual routes all on one big document. at some point i was like ok there needs to be some separation here. OBVIOUSLY. so I did that, and now i'll be able to actually say like "Oh Reapers Route is now currently at _thousand words making good progress there :)"

but yeah. theyre separated by:- -a document just for writing tips/advice/things to remember -a document just for character profiles (what they like, family bg, info like that etc etc.) -a document just for route plans. like an outline ig. briefly with notes like ok I want X character to have X arc, and X happens and progresses enough until they get to X -separate routes for each character in a diff document -and then just a main document to fall back on and compare notes or there's a few extra things there. like for example, im still not sure on some names. In this doc there's a section just for me to look at a long list of names i've saved to mull on later. :)

it's kind of still. a lot. but ideally more organize,, for me at least

third) lost contact with that one project manager i'd gotten </3 I still have their info yeah but ig due to the fact that there's not much I've given them info wise theyve left me to my own devices (which makes sense(?). but thats fine. I may reach out again when things are a little more fleshed out i suppose. I definitely do run off of compliments and people expectations unfortunately, so having ppl interested and asking things is what keeps me working. im not as much of a 'do it yourself for yourself satisfaction person anymore, I need outside sources to drive me so that I can feel like I'm actually leaving a proper mark on something

WHICH. I know is not good, but that's been my process while working on the game and most things. -I share a little tidbit (but not too much with friends or mutuals. -They express interest or tell me abt which characters they feel drawn too -I feel good and want to keep working harder! its like that and lastly) concerning things going on with the relationship between creators and other ppls entitlement to their OCs (which i will not name directly), that is something ive talked abt in depth in private but I would like to at least put this down somewhere one day in case anyone finds it. Please do not treat my OCs like they are yours. its much different as a small indie creator to have characters than to claim a character from a big company game or series is your OC. I'd feel so bad if people overlooked what I say and cross boundaries

#gamedev #devlog #kendeavor

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xcrystalzero · 3 years

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it's called a starconch

pairing: childe x gn!reader

summary: a seashell shouldn't hold as much meaning as childe lets it. and yet, he can't seem to let go.

note: i think i'm going through my angsty teenage stage as a literal adult.... also this shit long, good luck! also SPOILER WARNING HERE FOR THE LIYUE ARCHON QUEST DONT READ IF YOU HAVENT FINISHED IT!!!!!!!

Childe had always loved the ocean. Coming from a little fishing village on the coast, the Snezhnayan ocean had always felt like home, but that wasn't the ocean he was talking about.

It was so warm here compared to his homeland, the coasts lined with fine golden sand that crumbled under his feet and shells of every color under the sun scattered about. One in particular caught his eye and Childe knelt down slowly to take it in his hand.

"It's called a Starconch!"

He nearly spun around in panic as the voice seemed to echo around him. He hadn't heard that voice in long enough that it almost sounded real, and yet, there was no way that could have been the case.

With a soft sigh, he turned his gaze back out towards the sea. Starconch...

~~~

Liyue was a country of colors. The moment he had first stepped off of the boat and into Liyue Harbor, he had been awed by the way that city seemed to shine. The warm light of a thousand lanterns hanging from every building he could see pushed back the darkness of night, bathing the place and the people in a golden glow.

And in that golden glow, he saw you.

"Welcome to Liyue Sir Tartaglia!" Your smile was warm like the city around you and yet, Childe sensed that it wasn't entirely genuine. "I am [name], a representative on behalf of the Liyue Qixing. It is an honor to have you in our harbor." Ah, that was why. Well, you were smart not to trust the Fatui who had just docked in the city you were meant to protect.

Well, two could play at that game. It took him but a moment to pull his usual grin to his face as he extended a hand. "Quite the warm welcome! Trust me, the honor is all mine."

He didn't miss the way the side of your mouth quirked slightly upwards at that as you regarded him with a somewhat bemused expression before returning the gesture.

"And please, call me Childe."

~~~

"Fancy seeing you here." Childe had been heading out on a request to monitor a Fatui base near the coast and had thought to grab some food for the road before he left when he saw your figure weaving between the various stands set up around Liuili Pavilion.

He wasn't sure how to feel about the way his heart seemed to jump at the sight of you though. It wasn't as though he didn't see you often. His position as a foreign diplomat and your role as a representative of the Qixing made it so that communication between you two was an all-too normal occurrence. Almost every day as luck would have it and yet, he wasn't sure if he would ever get bored of the prospect of running into you.

You turned to face him and Childe couldn't manage to hold back the laugh that erupted out of him. Your cheeks were puffed out like a chipmunk, likely filled with a huge bite of the pastry you were currently cradling protectively in your hands as though you thought he was going to steal it from you.

Your cheeks went red as you threw a hand up in front of your face as you finished your bite before turning a glare back on him. "What..."

"Hungry?" He teased, stepping around you to scan the stand's wares as he pulled his wallet out.

"Shut it..." You muttered, promptly folding the wrapping of your pastry up over the top and slipping it into your pocket. "I thought you were Ganyu... She's always yelling at me not to eat so many sweets but they're just so good..."

Childe chuckled at that, earning him another sideways glare from your direction. "Ah, so is that your weakness then?" He plucked a handful of fruits from the stall as well as a pair of lemon tarts sitting in a small container to the side, offering the money for them to the stand owner as he stowed them in his knapsack.

"What do you need to know about my weaknesses Fatui?" Ah yes, there is was. The thing that had drawn Childe to you in the first place. The city of Liyue was warm and so were the people, but there were times when for you, that warmth rose into a heated blaze. You weren't afraid to challenge him, to dart across the line drawn by diplomacy and come just close enough that he was tempted to chase after you when you retreated.

There was a slight smirk on your face as you waited for his answer. He sighed, shrugging with a soft smile. "I mean, it can't hurt right?"

"You're insufferable." He might have been offended if you actually meant that. Thankfully, that smirk was still there so he had nothing to worry about.

"Say, I'm going out to the coast right now for some inspections. You think you can spare a moment to come with me?" The question was out of his mouth before he could stop it.

"Why me?" You questioned immediately, suspicion evident.

"U-Um... Well it'll be a little suspicious if a Fatui Harbinger just takes off out of nowhere right?" An awful excuse truly. There had been multiple instances already in his short time in Liyue that Childe had just taken off to get done whatever it was that he needed to get done. In fact, it was something of a known fact within the Bank that he enjoyed heading out for smaller tasks every once in a while just to get some combat practice and stretch his muscles. That being said, there was no way you knew that so...

"So you want someone to account for you, is that it?" you remarked, crossing your arms over your chest as you studied him.

"Well..."

"Okay sure."

He shouldn't have let his gaze fly up to meet yours as quickly as he did. He shouldn't have let the jolt of happiness he felt show in his eyes, or allowed his smile to become the slightest bit more real. But he did, and he was sure that you noticed.

"A-Alright then, let's go!"

~~~

"Well, that went well." You clapped your hands together, brushing off any dirt that had accumulated as you made your way down the shore, taking a seat on a small outcropping or rock placed conveniently in the shade of a large tree.

Childe trailed after, taking big, dramatic steps as he tried to keep the ever shifting sand out of his shoes. "Sure did..." He heard your laughter and despite the fake pout he wore, the sound was nothing less than heartwarming.

"Take your shoes off!" you encouraged, kicking your feet up to show that you had already done a much. After a moment of hesitation, he complied, slipping his boats off and tossing them to the side as he took a seat beside you, staring out at the ocean.

Childe would have loved to say that the silence was comfortable. However, the truth of the matter was that he felt strange. The crash of waves onto the shore was nearly drowned out by the pounding of his own heart as though the thing were beating inside of his head instead of his chest. Well, they had been moving for a while, maybe he was just tired. Or dehydrated. His palms were sweaty though, that was new... Likely just the fact that he was wearing his coat. He wasn't built for the warm Liyue climate after all!

"Childe?" Oh no, your hand was on his shoulder. His already deafening heartbeat felt as though it was speeding up further, the heat in his body seeming to concentrate at the point where your hand made contact with him.

Wait. None of this was normal. All of these feelings seemed to be related to you in some way or another. How strange. Was he ... nervous?

"You called?" He didn't recall thinking those words, but they were already out of his mouth, complete in true "Childe" fashion with a teasing tone and smile. Wow, he was even better at faking it than he thought.

"You were completely spaced out... Don't tell me a little inspection is all it takes to tire out a Fatui Harbinger!" It sounded like just another dig at him but Childe was sure that he heard just the slightest bit of concern hidden in your joking words. The realization did not help his current confusion in the slightest.

"Nothing wears me out! You on the other hand, look like you could use a snack. Now, if only someone brought one..." He tossed back before digging into his bag and pulling out the little carton holding the pair of lemon tarts he had purchased earlier that day. He didn't miss the way your eyes lit up before you pointedly glanced away.

"You think you can bribe me into being nicer to you?" you scoffed.

"Whenever did I say anything like that?" Childe popped open the top, holding the tray out to you. After a moment, you hesitantly reached out, plucking one of the little tarts out.

"Thanks..."

Childe smiled as he took the other half of the pair, immediately taking a huge bite out of the side, savoring the way the tartness of the lemon contrasted with the buttery, flaky crust. "Anytime!"

"I have something for you too..." Popping the last of the treat into his mouth, Childe turned to face you only to see that you were holding something out to him. Taking it immediately, he held it up to his face, turning it about in his hands in confusion.

"Is this, a shell?"

When he looked back at you for confirmation, he was somewhat surprised to see a slight blush beginning to spread over the tops of your cheeks.

"It's called a Starconch! They're native to Liyue so I didn't think you'd seen one before." you offered as clarification as Childe continued to inspect the little thing.

"It's pretty. But why for me?"

There was a pause. "It may have reminded me of you..."

There it was again. The panicked rhythm of his heart and the warmth and the confusion. "Oh? This shell did?"

"It... It looked like your eyes. It's kind of pretty..."

Childe's gravestone was going to look so stupid. Here lies Tartaglia, 11th Harbinger in service of the Tsaritsa. Defeated by a seashell and a compliment about his eyes.

"What are you looking at me like that for Fatui?" He was drawn back to his present, sadly still alive self and your blushing face as you awaited his reaction. He attempted to pull a self-satisfied smirk to his face, combing his mind for a response that was just the perfect balance of confident and joking and accepting, and came up empty.

He tried, he tried as hard as he could but he couldn't think of anything. Anything except you that was. Slowly, he set the Starconch down beside him as he turned fully to face you.

"[name]?"

"Yes?" To your credit, you showed no sign of wanting to retreat. He could see the flash of panic in your eyes as he suddenly came closer and yet, you made no move to pull away.

"Do you really think of me as just disgusting Fatui?"

"Huh?" Apparently, that had not been what you were expecting. You blinked twice, evidently confused.

"Is that what you think of me?" he reiterated, not daring to break eye contact in case it gave you a chance to pull away.

"I mean, you are definitely Fatui but I don't think of you as disgusting or anything..." You offered, eyes wide as though you weren't sure what answer he wanted from you.

"And just to be clear, an honorable representative of the Liyue Qixing wouldn't want to be seen with the Fatui right?" There was a slight waver in his tone that he couldn't seem to get rid of it. He hated it. Rather than the usual confidence that oozed from his every word, he sounded unsure. Hesitant even.

It was you who broke eye contact then, glancing down at your hands as you kneaded them nervously in your lap. "Well, they probably shouldn't..." His heart dropped. "But..."

Childe's eyes flew open as you pressed your lips against his, your own eyes squeezed so tightly shut he was sure it hurt. It took a second of coaxing but he found himself slowly leaning into you, hands coming up to wrap around your waist as yours coiled over his shoulders before traveling up into his hair. He felt you smiling into the kiss and the thought spurred him on as he pulled you in until you were all but sitting on his lap.

It wasn't particularly fiery or passionate or anything he believed your first kiss would be like, but there was something else there. It felt like release. When you began to pull away, Childe let out a soft whine, lips following yours as you drifted tantalizingly out of range.

"Relax harbinger." you drawled, glancing up at him with half-lidded eyes, your expression tempting enough that he almost threw himself at you right then and there. "We have all the time in the world. I'm not going anywhere."

~~~

"I think this is turning into an actual problem."

Childe pouted in response to your remark as he continued to organize all of the starconches you had collected into neat little rows on the sand before you. There had to be at least 50 of them, all in different shapes and sizes of every shade blue one could imagine.

This had become your new ritual. Every free evening the two of you had, you would come back to this spot, the location of the first starconch exchange. What had started as a cute little bonding activity though, as with anything with Childe, had quickly become a competition. Now, it was a contest as the two of you continuously tried to one-up each other in finding the most beautiful starconch.

"It's fine! They're pretty right?" He turned towards you, stupid shit-eating grin plastered on his face. "They remind you of my eyes remember?"

You rolled your eyes as you straightened out the harbinger's less-than even rows. "Ah, how I regret saying that..."

"Rude!"

When all of the little shells had been perfectly arranged, the two of you stood back to consider them.

"I call the top right."

"Hey, I wanted that one!"

"Too bad, I was quicker."

Childe pouted again but didn't protest as he bent down to pick up the shell you had chosen and then one that he liked as well. When he reached out to offer it to you however, you reached for his other hand, grabbing the shell he had picked.

"Huh?"

You smiled. "You like this one and you like me, so I get this one. "

"I am ... confused," Childe confessed, though the smile adorning his lips contrasted his words. He reached for your free hand, intertwining his fingers with yours, tugging you away from your little shaded safe-haven and towards the water.

"Hey!" you protested though you let him pull you there, laughing the entire time. "What are you doing, we don't have a change of clothes!"

"Doesn't matter! It's a waste to come to the beach and never touch the water, don't you think?" Childe grinned as he pulled the two of you into the waves just in time for one to crash down, instantly soaking the two of you from waist down.

You gaped in faux shock as you swatted at the man's arm. "Childe!"

He laughed, a free, unrestrained sound unlike the one he was so used to performing in front of others when trying to remain the ever charming and relaxed Fatui diplomat the people of Liyue had to see him as.

Childe. He had told you to call him that. That was what everyone called him after all, and yet, it didn't sound right anymore. Not coming from you.

"Childe?" It was a question this time, as though you had been able to sense that something was amiss with your lover.

"Ajax," he replied.

"What?"

"Ajax, that's my name. My real one anyway."

Your eyes widened as you stared at him in shock, the hand you had resting against his arm slipping slowly down back to your side. "Is... Is it okay for you to tell me that?"

Childe scoffed, running a hand through his hair. Damn, this was more embarrassing than he thought it would be. It was just a name! "It's my name, and I want you to call me it. There shouldn't be a problem with that right?"

You stared at him for a moment longer before leaning in, placing soft lips against his for just a moment. "Alright then, Ajax. Don't regret it."

And then you dunked him, pushing him down the moment the enxt wave crested over you two. When he pulled himself back to the surface, sputtering in shock, there was a dangerous grin on his face.

"Oh, it's on now!"

~~~

"What's happening with that traveller you've been talking to recently?" There was nothing accusatory about your tone and yet, Childe couldn't help but hear is as an accusation.

"Nothing much," he shrugged. "They're looking for someone and the information they've dug up has been pretty useful so far."

"Useful huh..." Well now you were definitely suspicious. Childe felt bad about it, he really did, but there was no way he could involve you in any of this. His loyalty was to the Tsaritsa and he was required to carry out her orders. With your loyalty in line with the Qixing, he had no doubt that you would be at odds with the Fatui's plans in the coming weeks, but there was nothing he could do about that. What you didn't know couldn't hurt you.

If worst came to worst and he was forced to attack Liyue however, he had already made preparations. A quick look at your schedule for the coming weeks had confirmed that you were going to be taking a quick trip to Fontaine for some business you had chosen not to disclose with him. Not that he particularly cared what it was that you were doing, just that you would be gone when everything went south. As long as you weren't hurt, everything would be fine.

"They're a nice kid honestly! I introduced them to Zhongli yesterday and they seem to be getting along quite well!" Childe offered. You quirked an eyebrow at him, recognizing an olive branch when you heard it.

"I mean, Zhongli is a hard man to hate." You took the branch.

"Which reminds me, we're still on for dinner tonight right?" Childe could pat himself on the back for how smooth that conversation shift was. You seemed less impressed though as you rolled your eyes at him.

"I guess if I have to..."

"Hey!" You were laughing again and Childe felt his heart soften. He hated this game of keeping secrets from you, but if it kept you safe, kept you happy and content and laughing, he might be able to play the game for just a bit longer.

~~~

It felt like you were going to crush his ribcage, but Childe wouldn't have it any other way. He was sure that his grip on you was just as strangling as he buried his face in your neck.

Slowly, you pulled yourself away from him, eyes sad even as you mustered a smile to your face. "I'll be back in 3 weeks max okay! That's not that long!"

"Yes it is." Childe didn't mince his words and didn't miss your flinch at his statement. He wanted to badly to grab onto you and not let you take a step closer to that boat. To drag you back to his apartment with him and sit you down there until this was all over. But he couldn't.

You would be safer in Fontaine. You wouldn't be part of anything that happened. And best of all, if this all went fine, you wouldn't ever have to know what he did. He didn't want to lie to you, but he couldn't see a way around it this time.

Instead of voicing as much, he pulled you back in for a final kiss, not caring that there were definitely people watching and gaping at the show he was putting on. You hummed softly but didn't do much to fight him, letting him press himself into you as you gently brushed some stray strands of his way hair out of his face.

He only let go when the ship's captain sounded the horn in impatience, though his half-smile made it clear that he wasn't particularly mad at the young couple's display. You squeezed his hand once more.

"I'll see you soon okay Ajax."

"Be safe [name]." You nodded smiling at him once more before slowly detangling your fingers from his and making your way up the ramp onto the ship.

Childe waved until the ship had completely left the harbor, even when it was clear that there was no way you could still see him. When the shape of the ship had finally faded behind the sea fog, he grudgingly turned to make his way back to the Bank, only to be faced with a nervous looking Fatui recruit who nearly jumped when they made eye contact.

"M-Master Childe! There's some new information you should probably know about."

Childe raised his eyebrows in a silent question and when the recruit nodded, he took a slow breath it. So it was starting.

~~~

"Master Childe!" Ekaterina greeted him the moment he stepped through the doors of Northland Bank. He mustered the strength to give her a quick wave, even as his entire body ached at the slightest movement. The Foul Legacy transformation really was something but he wasn't sure he would ever truly get used to the backlash.

"How are you feeling?"

"Well enough," he lied. After that stunt that Signora and Zhongli had just pulled on him, he wasn't in the best mood at the moment. "What is the situation like?"

Ekaterina paused and Childe narrowed his eyes at the way some strange expression had crept suddenly onto her face. "What happened?"

"Well, you're quite the wanted man... It seems word has gotten out about your involvement in all this, though I'm not quite sure how..." The traveller huh? Well, that much was expected considering how things had gone. If only they hadn't gotten in his way. Of course, he had relished in the battle they had been able to share, but it would most definitely have been cleaner if they hadn't been around.

"That much is expected," he said with a soft laugh. Ekaterina offered him a thin smile, and that was when he knew that something was wrong. "There's something more isn't there?"

"Um... There was something..."

"Well, spit it out then."

"There were a few casualties in the event..."

"Really?" Childe was genuinely shocked by that. "Outside of the Millelith? I thought the adepti would have been able to protect everyone within the city."

"Yes well, most of the people in the city were fine... It's just, there were some just outside of the border..." Ekaterina fumbled with her words, eyes downcast in a way that was starting to worry Childe.

"Like?"

"Well, there was a ship that turned around because of a storm up ahead and ran straight into Osial's torrents," she finally spit it out, eyes flashing with panic when she finally looked back up at him.

"A ship? A ship..." Childe's blood ran cold. "A ship going where?"

"... Fontaine sir."

The next few moments may have been filled with silence to an outsider watching, but Childe's head was filled with a roaring. He heard voices and people and the sound of his blood rushing through his body and the air filling his lungs as he heaved in breath after breath. It was all just noise, there was so much noise.

Childe grabbed onto the counter as his feet collapsed from under him, breath coming in thick inhales as he struggled to gain purchase. No. This, this wasn't happening. There was no way.

"Where is the ship?" he managed to get out between breaths, eyes flashing up to Ekaterina. He wasn't sure if she squeaked in fright or it was just his delirious mind playing tricks on him, but she answered him anyway, hurt registering even in her voice.

"It washed up on shore this morning... There was no sign of anyone who had been on-board..."

This wasn't real. Childe's vision was starting to go dark, black edges creeping slowly inwards as he struggled to sit back up.

"That... That can't be possible. They're here. They probably made it back. They're waiting for me. I have to get to them." He attempted to push himself to his feet but all the strength in his body was gone. The black in his vision was growing and without warning, he found himself slumped against the cold tile of the Northland Bank floor.

"Master Childe!" Ekaterina's worried voice registered somewhere in his brain but the darkness was slowly encroaching.

His fingers attempted to clutch at something, only to find the chilly smoothness of tile beneath him. This was a dream, some fever nightmare brought on my the transformation. It was fine, he would open his eyes and everything would be fine. He could already see you, the little smirk on your face as you teased him for getting so worked up over nothing. Oh, you'd have a good laugh about this one.

And it was with the image of you in his mind that Childe passed out.

~~~

Childe barely remembered the weeks that had followed. He distinctly remembered not going to the funeral, partially because he would be arrested on the spot, but mostly because that would mean accepting it all, and he was not ready for that.

He still wasn't sure he accepted it.

And so, here he was. This wasn't your spot, the little cove with the rock and perfectly placed tree where you were constantly unearthing the most perfect starconches, but it was the Liyue shore, and that was all it took. Childe studied the shell in his hand for a moment, brushing the remaining flecks of sand off slowly as he did.

This was the prettiest one he had seen in a while. There weren't any visible cracks and the color was the richest blue, exactly like the one you had given him so long ago.

Childe considered the conch for a moment longer before sliding it into his pocket and turning away from waves.

"Why? Why won't you move on?"

Childe sighed, shoving his hands into the pockets of his coat as he trudged up the shore. The little shell rubbed against his fingers and even though he knew there was no one there, he spoke out loud.

"It reminds me of you. Everything does."

#genshin impact #genshin imagines #genshin fic #genshin impact fic #childe #tartaglia #genshin tartaglia #childe genshin impact #genshin childe #childe x reader #childe x you #childe x y/n #ajax #genshin ajax

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